#i think the other reason it rubs me the wrong way
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Oh damn!! Mind if I just explode into particles about the latest Circuits and Wires??
BOOM!! 💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💕💕💕💕💕
I love it so much
Wheeljack’s always been a favorite, just that optimism that’s undiminished no matter how many times his projects literally blow up in his face.
Also: Let’s see how many of these I can update in a day
Circuits and Wires Pt 10
Wheeljack x Reader
• Shifting to sit curled up in his lap, you’re aware of him shifting his arm as if wanting to touch and not sure where is okay. Biting into the inside of your cheek as he struggles, you reach back and pull his arm around you, pressing his big hand against your hip and feeling him shiver under you. Because one of you is going to have to be assertive and you’re almost positive it’s not going to be him. Reaching for his other hand, you pull it to you and play with his servos, fingertips tracing over the softer metal mesh at the inside of his wrist as you lay your head against him.
• You’re so soft and warm against him, he wants to tip your head up. Explore your soft mouth and let his hands wander. Would you let him? Optics dim, he doesn’t dare try to find out. Too afraid of being rejected or ruining this. Glossa sliding against his bottom lip remembering the feel of your mouth on his, he flexes his servos when you run your fingertips against the inside of them. And you look up at him, head against his shoulder. Slowly, he presses his palm to yours, intertwining his servos with your fingers, the difference in how much smaller your little hands is, shocking. Even mass displaced, you’re so delicate compared to him. And a part of him thrills at that difference.
• Breath catching as you stare at your hand trapped in his much bigger one and feel the servos of the hand on your hip flex against you. Making you wonder what those big hands would feel like on you. “I keep thinking I’m going to break you,” he says, vocal indicators flickering mauve. Embarrassed? About breaking you? Why would he even-oh. Heat spilling through you, his awkwardness twists, takes on a new meaning. Not even sure how that would work between you two. Though, those big fingers could be put to use. And now the thought is there as your face heats.
• Head ducking against him as he catches a glimpse of how red your face just got, he frowns. “I promise you won’t break me,” you mutter, avoiding looking at him as your fingers squeeze his. Venting, he absently rubs against your hip and rests his chin on top of your head. Loving the feel of you against him and not quite believing that he’s allowed this much.
• “I hope not. I like having you around,” he says as you cringe. Because nope. It’s going right over his handsome, dense head unless you spell it out for him. Maybe he’d hadn’t meant it that way after all. And asking about it? Bluntly telling him that you’re interested in him that way? You’d rather curl up and die of embarrassment right now. So you’re right back to square one, you too shy and him too damn oblivious.
Previous
I am all motors and gadgets
Organically designed to last a finite length of time
Locked in this rotary motion, the wheel spins round and round
I comprehend it all but still can't make a sound
I know there's something wrong within my faulty brain
I lack the proper behavior
My temper-addled tongue can't seem to force it out
The words that linger inside me
Can't speak, can't speak, can't speak at all
Don't even think you know the reason
Can't speak, can't speak, can't speak at all
Don't even try to understand
I am all circuits and wires
Conducting symphonies of heat exchange energies
My temper-addled tongue can't seem to force it out
The words that linger inside me
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close to you
in which fred weasley and his best friend are oblivious to each other's feelings
PAIRING: fred weasley ii x gryffindor!reader, fred weasley ii x fem!reader
WARNINGS: fluff, angst, obliviousness!!, arguing, misunderstanding, poor theodore nott jr
WORD COUNT: 3.0k
“Godric.” James groaned, holding his head between his hands. “They’ve been arguing for hours.”
Roxanne laughed. “You think we’d be used to it by now.” She crossed her arms. “What are they arguing about this time?”
James scoffed, leaning back into the plush Gryffindor common room couch. “Oh, you weren’t listening?” Roxanne shook her head. He smirked, sighing as if he was disappointed. “Allow me to enlighten you. Your darling brother brought up the fact that Ophelia Scamander was going alone to the Yule Ball.”
“Alright?”
“I’m almost certain he brought that up to get a reaction from Y/N.”
Roxanne laughed. “Is that what started this then?”
James shook his head, thoroughly entertained that Roxanne hadn’t caught on yet. “What started this was that Y/N brought up she already had a date.”
Roxanne’s jaw dropped. “You’re joking.”
“I wish I was. Your brother overreacted…”
“Typical.”
“Hence the argument we’ve been spectators to for roughly-” He checked his watch. “Ten minutes.”
“That’s it!”
They looked over, surprised that steam wasn’t hissing from Y/N’s ears. Her voice was shrill, ringing through the otherwise empty common room. “Come find me when you become an adult.” She stormed off, her gaze fixed on the exit.
Fred scoffed, yelling after her. “Jokes on you. I already am!”
The portrait door slammed shut, and an uncomfortable silence fell over the room. James coughed. “Trouble in paradise?”
Fred glared, plopping on the couch beside him. “Shut it, you.”
Roxanne sighed. “Freddie, why do you think you were so upset about this?”
“I assumed we were going together.”
James grinned. “And why’s that?”
“I know where this is going, James. We’re best friends.” Fred almost looked dejected as he said it. “Nothing more.”
Roxanne laughed. Godric, it was a miracle he survived day to day with how thick he could be. “Do you ever stop and think that perhaps the reason you and dear Y/N/N argue so often is because you fancy each other?”
“Rox…”
James sighed, looking at his cousin guiltily. “She’s not wrong, Fred.”
Fred groaned. “Not you too.” He stood up, his hands on his hips. “I’m off to find Y/N.”
“Have fun!”
“Bugger off, James!”
The library was quieter than the Gryffindor Common Room, that much was evident. The majority of the student body could be found there at any time of day staring at textbooks, committing their information to memory. She smiled to herself, it was nice to have the solitude the library offered compared to the chaos her home brought contained. It almost made her laugh: Fred had no right to be that upset, but she couldn’t help but feel butterflies erupt in her stomach whenever he had an overprotective stint. He was gorgeous, anyone with eyes knew, the way his eyes lit up when he was passionate about something. And the fact he was so annoyed with her choice of date made her dare to think that-
“Y/N.”
“Fredrick.”
He sat down, carrying a look that mirrored that of a kicked puppy. “I shouldn’t have reacted that way. It wasn’t fair.”
Ah. She felt disappointed. “That’s very… responsible of you.”
“Do you, do you have anything to say?”
“Do I?” She scoffed, setting down her quill to see if he was being serious. “Am I supposed to be apologizing as well?”
He sighed. “I didn’t mean for it to sound like that. I just-”
“What?” She snapped. “What did you just-”
“I can’t stand you being mad at me.” He hissed. “I know it’s my fault, love.” He reached out, holding her hand and rubbing the back with his thumb. “You’re my best friend, and we can’t be mad at each other forever.”
It was like a bucket of cold water thrown on her face. Why had he always felt the need to break her heart? “I don’t know what gave you the impression I was mad at you Fred.”
“Oh, I don’t know.” He laughed. “The fact that you stormed off and have been avoiding eye contact this entire conversation.”
She stuck her tongue out. “You’re my best friend too. And trust me, I could never be mad at you.”
“Good.” He smiled. “Have you found a dress yet?”
She shook her head. “I haven’t, actually. Would you want to come along? Roxie already got hers, and the rest of the girls had them shipped in.”
“Sounds like you've already planned my Saturday.”
She shoved his arm, glaring. “Oh, because you had such compelling plans.”
“Godric, woman, stop pulling me,” Fred whined.
She rolled her eyes, pushing open the door of Gladrags. “Would you rather have frozen? Really, you should be thanking me.” She let go of his hand to remove her coat, and Fred almost outwardly whined from the loss of touch. “It’s not my fault you walk slower than a flobberworm.”
They strolled through the aisles, and every so often Y/N handed Fred a dress to hold. “Are you excited?”
“To watch you play dress up for two hours?” He smiled sarcastically. “Ecstatic.”
“Guard my room will you.” She yelled through the curtain. “Do you swear?”
He nodded, smiling to himself. “I solemnly swear.”
She rolled her eyes, laughing to herself. “Is that a reference to that stupid map?”
“Love, they’re all starting to look the same.”
Y/N glared, visibly defeated by the many hours of trying on dress after dress after dress. “If I knew you would be so unhelpful I wouldn’t have brought you.”
He held his hands up in surrender. “Do you trust me?”
“You know I do.”
Fred stood up, and she naturally followed after him. “You need something different. Not something you find at first glance.” She smacked his arm, obviously taking offense. “I wasn’t saying you have bad taste, I’m just-” Her eyebrow raised impatiently. “Getting to the point.” He stopped, pulling out the most stunning dress she’d ever seen in her life. “I know that I don’t have the best taste-”
“It’s perfect.” She squealed, kissing him on the cheek. “You’re perfect.”
He laughed, handing her the dress. “Go on, then.”
She ran to the dressing rooms. The dress he'd picked was white, with (what looked like) a thousand layers of tule, all coming to an end at an empire waistline. Jewels had been expertly sewn in, and as she looked closer, she realized they were snowflakes.
The back would prove to be an issue, she thought as she closed the curtain. She could lace most of it herself, but- Godric, she would need someone else to help her. “Fred.”
A beat of silence. “Everything alright, love?”
She took a deep breath. “I need your help.”
“With?” His voice sounded tight.
“I can’t-” She huffed, picked up the front of the dress, and walked out of the dressing room. “The lacing...” Fred stared, and her heart skipped a beat, there was that look again. “Stop looking at me like that.” He stepped forward, whispering gently.
“Turn around.”
“Excuse me?” She tilted her head.
“The lacing.” He reminded her why she'd even called for his help. “Turn around.”
She obliged, smiling to herself as his fingers grazed her back. “You picked the perfect dress, Freddie.”
His cheeks felt like they were on fire, tightening the laces once more before tying a bow. “It’s nothing…” She turned around, and he realized how serious this moment really was. “You know, you look like the moon itself.”
She laughed, actually laughed. He almost glared, here he was complimenting her, and she laughed at him. “What’s so funny?”
“I’m sorry, it’s just that you looked so serious when you said it.”
“Oh really?” He raised an eyebrow, a smile creeping on his face. “Well, remind me to never compliment you again.”
“No!” She begged. “Please, don’t.”
“Fine, fine.” Somehow his arm had found its way around her waist, and time seemed to stand still. It felt natural almost, like her waist had been made for his arm to be draped around it. “You’ve convinced me.”
“What are we doing? This is-”
“Y/N." He swallowed, his mouth felt dry. "I need to kiss you now. Is that- okay?”
She nodded, her eyelids lulling in anticipation. “Yes.”
“I- I’m going to-”
“Fred, just kiss me!” Her voice was ruder than she intended, her eyes widening. “Sorry, I-”
“I don’t think we should.” He whispered. “It would only-”
Tears pricked at her eyes, and she felt like she could die right there. Her voice broke as she spoke. “Can you undo the laces please?”
He nodded. “I’m sorry-”
“Fred, just do it.” Her voice was harsh, and his fingers fumbled with the strings. “Don’t apologize to me. We both wanted to, just…” The dress was loose, and she crossed her arms, barely holding it up as she turned around. Her eyes were glassy, and Fred had never felt this guilty in her life. Tears were steadily streaming down her face. “Promise me you won’t tell anyone about this.”
“I-”
“Promise me!”
“I promise.”
She shoved past him, pulling the curtain shut. “I think you should leave.”
“Y/N…”
“Fred, go away.”
Her tone dripped with venom. He’d never heard her sound that betrayed, more angry, and it made him want to stay even more, to help her and make up for his cowardice. “Love, let me-”
“Just stop!” She screamed. “I think it’s best if we take a break.”
“A break?” His voice sounded nervous. Good, she wanted him to squirm like she just had. “From what?”
“Whatever this is Fred. I’m tired of it. You- You coward.” She walked out of the dressing room, glaring at her best friend. “I have feelings for you and I can’t- I can’t be around you like this. So please just don’t talk to me.”
She stormed out of the shop, leaving Fred alone with his thoughts. He was empty, he realized. It was stupid: honestly, the most foolish thing he’d ever done, backing out of something he knew he'd wanted to do for ages.
She was right, he was a coward. How many, he asked himself, could stand in the face of perfection itself and not crumble? He pushed open the curtain, frowning at the dress that had been thrown on the ground.
“Excuse me?” He stood up, turning around to see an older witch looking at him with blatant concern. “Is everything alright, dear?”
“I’d-” He took a deep breath, folding the dress delicately. “I’d like to buy this dress please.”
The older witch nodded, leading him to the register. “She’s very lucky.”
He laughed, shaking his head. “I’m the lucky one.”
“Y/N!” Roxanne called out from the bottom of the stairs. “There’s a package for you.”
Her mother wasn’t due to send her a care package for another week. Her eyebrows furrowed as she climbed out of bed. She’d wanted to sleep as long as she could before getting ready for the ball, but the universe had other plans for her. “Who’s it from?”
Roxanne shrugged. “Don't know.”
Y/N laughed. “A lot of help you are. There’s no note?”
She shook her head. “It’s a pretty big box.”
Y/N nodded. “Thanks, Rox.”
“Can I-” Roxanne smiled. “Can I come with you?”
“Do you even need to ask?” Y/N wiggled her eyebrows, racing up the stairs, with Roxanne hot on her tail. They jumped onto Y/N’s bed, ripping the box open eagerly.
“A note!” Roxanne grinned. “Any idea who could be your secret admirer?”
“Not a clue.” She was lying through her teeth of course, but she couldn’t tell Roxanne this secret. This one had to be just for her and Fred. Taking the note from her friend's hand, she carefully opened it, her cheeks flushing at its words.
“You were right?” Roxanne murmured. Y/N turned around, glaring. “Sorry. It’s just so interesting.” She pulled the dress out of the box, smiling softly. “It’s a beautiful dress.”
“It is.” Y/N stood up, holding it against herself as she looked in the mirror. “It really is.”
“I’ll see you down there, yeah?” Roxanne squeezed her hand. “You look radiant, truly.”
“Thanks, Rox.” Y/N squeezed back, taking a deep breath. “I’ll see you soon.”
It was a few moments later before she felt brave enough to walk down the grand stone steps. She could hardly breathe, and wearing this dress- Merlin, she hoped tonight was perfect. She rounded the corner, gripping the railing with all of her strength. The crowd at the bottom of the stairs hadn’t turned around in awe, which did wonders for her nerves. She would have hated for people to fuss over her.
What had made her nervous was the fact that ever since she’d stepped out from behind the corner, Fred had been staring at her so intensely, that she thought she would burst into flames.
Behind Fred, was her date, Theodore Nott. Much like his father, he was stoic and knew what he wanted. When he’d asked her, she thought it had been a joke. But he'd proven to be a kind man underneath it all, and she knew she would have a nice time with him.
Now, she was dreading seeing his face; there was no way that he'd see past her evident feelings for her best friend.
When she finally reached the bottom of the stairs, they was practically standing face to face. Her heart lept, frozen in time. Fred was just standing there, staring at her as intently as before. She quickly stepped around him, making her way to Theo before she would do something she'd regret.
Her date was rather cheery, which made her cheery as well. He bowed, taking her hand and kissing the back gently. “Your beauty rivals that of a veela, Y/L/N.”
“Flattery will get you nowhere.” She grinned, standing on her tiptoes so that she could kiss his cheek. “But thank you.”
He smiled, extending his arm. “Shall we?”
“We shall.”
“She looks perfect,” Fred murmured, watching her walk into the ballroom.
Roxanne nodded. “She does.”
“I’m an idiot, Rox.”
The girl smiled. “We all make mistakes, Freddie.”
“I should’ve kissed her.” He whispered so quietly she almost hadn’t heard him. “Has she-”
She shook her head, and Fred laughed. “How did you know?"
“She’s my best friend, and you're my brother. I know you two better than I know anyone." She smiled, hooking her arm through his. "I knew something was wrong the minute she came back without you."
“I love her.” He practically whined. “Do you know what it feels like to not be with the person you love?”
She shook her head once more. “I don't. But I can imagine that it’s painful, and it hurts. But then you realize that you would go through it all again…” She leaned her head on his shoulder. “Just for the chance to be with them.”
“Are you having a good time?” Theo felt helpless as he watched his date stare at another man. “I’m sorry if I-”
“What?” She shook her head. “Sorry, you were saying?”
“Are you having a good time?”
“I should ask you that.” She frowned. Theodore hated it when she frowned, she was too beautiful for that. “I haven’t been a proper Yule Ball date.”
He smiled, murmuring to himself. “I should have known.”
“I’m sorry?” Her heart stopped.
“I never should have asked you.”
“I’m confused.”
“Well, it’s obvious you wanted Weasley to ask you. Right?”
“I-” She looked out at the dance floor, smiling faintly at his horrible dancing. “Unfortunately.”
He nodded, standing up. “You won’t mind if I-”
She shook her head, “I’m really sorry, Teddy.”
He laughed. “You’re the only person that calls me Teddy.”
“Go talk to her.” Roxanne nudged her brother. “If you keep staring at her from across the room she’s going to think you’re obsessed with her.”
“I am.” He corrected. “Obsessed with her.” He looked back, tilting his head. “You think I should?”
“Freddie…” James groaned. “Go talk to her before I do. I’m getting sick of this back and forth. OW!”
Fred looked over, laughing as Roxanne smacked their cousin over the head. “Fine, fine. I’ll go. Just stop fighting.”
“She’s waiting for you.” Fred tensed at the familiar voice. “Nott.”
“Weasley,” Theodore responded. “I need you to swear to me that you won’t hurt her.”
“What are you-”
The Slytherin’s eyes looked dark, and a chill ran down his spine. Theodore stepped forward, whispering. “Swear it, Weasley.”
“I swear.”
Theo smiled, not bothering to address Fred any longer, and waved goodbye to the two spectators. “Roxanne, Potter.”
James glared at their peer as he walked away. “What an odd bloke.”
She looked radiant. The wind elegantly blew what hair had fallen out of her updo. She looked straight out of that muggle film she’d forced him to watch.
The dress was glowing in the moonlight, she looked like pure magic, but he knew there was no way she wasn’t cold. She always had a shiver, even if it was bright and humid outside. He shrugged his suit jacket off, walking beside her and draping it over her shoulders.
“Thank you, Freddie.”
Merlin, her voice was like music to his ears. “Anytime, love.”
She hadn’t bothered to look over, and it brought comfort to him that she knew it was him without looking. He took a side step closer to her, whispering so that only they could hear. “You wore the dress.”
She nodded. “You have great taste.”
“I do, don’t I?” She rolled her eyes, finally looking at him, and he smiled, even if her look was a glare. He held his hands up in surrender, which seemed to be a common theme between them. “All jokes, love.”
“Did I-” She sighed, turning toward him. “Did I read it wrong?”
He shook his head. “No.”
“And if I want to kiss you again-”
He lunged forward, he couldn’t help himself any longer. He was a coward then, but Godric help him if he was a coward now. Their lips were still touching when he spoke next. “I love you.”
Her eyes were teary. “Fred…”
“I know you love me too.” He smiled, kissing her again lightly. “In my soul, I know it.” Grabbing her hand, he pulled it up to his chest, placing it directly over his thumping heart. “I’m sorry I didn’t realize it sooner, I’m sorry that I ignored it, but I’m here now, and I-” He grinned, kissing her again. “I love you.”
“I love you too.”
“Yeah?” He nudged his nose against hers. “You do know you’re stuck with me, right?”
“Freddie…” She laughed. “We've been stuck together for eighteen years. The chance to lose me has passed."
"I have never..." He whispered. "And will never want to lose you."
Her heart fluttered, caressing his cheek gently. “It’s snowing.”
He nodded, placing his arm around her waist, swaying back and forth. “It is.”
She giggled. “My, you’re smooth.”
“I pride myself on my charm.” He whispered, leaning down.
Her eyes fluttered shut. “As you should.”
He smiled, their lips barely touching. “You know, you really do look like the moon.”
taglist: @beebeechaos
#literature#fanfiction#harry potter#x reader#angst#fluff#harry potter x reader#harry potter next gen#harry potter next generation#harry potter next generation x reader#fred weasley ii x reader#fred weasley the second#fred weasley x reader#fred weasley II x reader#harry potter fanfiction#🪩! fics#christmas
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what i want out of helluva boss?
for Stolas to acknowledge any of the significant people in Blitz’s life. like he supposedly has strong feelings for him yet does he know the names of anyone in IMP? does he know Luna’s name?? how does he feel about Blitz’s obsession with Moxxie and Millie’s relationship??? like we literally know he’s aware of these things; he’s met Moxxie and Millie and Luna multiple times, he seems to know who all of them are, he even was dragged by Blitz to be a plus one to his lil spy session for Moxxie and Millie’s anniversary. he must have thoughts on this, and yet i feel like he never interacts with them. which feels significant bc if you like this guy so much you’re certainly not even trying to get to know the parts of his life that aren’t even a secret!! even fucking Verosika, she was also there that night and that wasn’t addressed.
like sure i wonder how Stolas would feel about Blitz’s relationship to Fizz or even his sister but that all makes sense for him to not know about bc Blitz goes to extreme lengths to not talk about them. but cmon man not his daughter? not his best friend?? shaking my head.
that and real Millie development but that’s a given
#i actually like the ship#it’s probably the ship i’m rooting for the most in vizzie’s universe#which is why i want this addressed so badly#i think the other reason it rubs me the wrong way#is that it feels like a class thing#like he’s sort of blind to it when it comes to blitz bc he has feelings for him#but he just sort of ignores moxxie and millie like they’re any other imp#which they’re not…#i would think he’d want to talk to them bc they’re his real ticket to learning about blitz#i want to believe stolas is sorta above the classist mindset but he’s sure not making a great case for himself#how many times has he literally been in the same scene as the imp crew and never once has he actually spoken to them#beyond maybe asking a question#again does he even know their names#i got so excited when i realized that moxxie and millie were going to be the ones to rescue him#and yet they still barely interacted#we’re sitting on a gold mine of fun interactions#!!!#helluva boss#txt#stolitz
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You ever just see a Mouthwashing take that makes you want to bang your head into a wall? I literally just saw someone claim Curly couldn't have been emotionally abused by Jimmy before the crash because he was in a higher position of power than Jimmy.
-Shrimp Anon
The mouthwashing fandom has shown me that people genuinely do believe that certain types of abuse are not as detrimental as other types especially when they deem those immune/resistant, ergo, believing one is objectively worse no matter how it affects the person nor the intersections of power, history and dynamics at play.
Get ready cause this is a yap session:
Cause like it's heavily implied that Curly and Jimmy's friendship was toxic and abusive, pointedly in the direction of how Jimmy uses Curly's belief/comfort in him. Curly wasn't forced to enable Jimmy but he was emotional and mentally on edge around him in almost every scene in some way. Mental and emotional abuse are not contingent on what positions you have at work. Yeah, he's Jimmy's boss but he was Jimmy's friend first and it's like getting into Psych discussion to talk about how social power tends to overshadow any perceived organizational power in the human mind. People are concerned about their jobs ofc but they tend to hang onto and put more value/investment into their personal relationships, hence why there tends to be laws and restrictions around mixing the two.
I always see the sentiments that "Curly is a grown ass man", "Curly is bigger than Jimmy", "Curly is Jimmy's boss", "He just needed a backbone" as criticisms of Curly and while I do agree that on the surface level all of these to be true and viable ways Curly could've taken more control of the situation, I often look at the parallels of Anya and Curly as victims of Jimmy pre/post crash.
The way Jimmy talks to Anya post crash is how he talked to Curly in the pre-crash segments. It's hard to pin-point mainly because we know he hates and wants nothing to do with Anya compared to his contrary but similarly handled obsessions with Curly. It's a weird sort of "honey-moon" effect of abuse Jimmy does in terms of emotional and mental victimization. He is always horrid to Anya, always talking down or questioning her abilities and thoughts in a situation, this of course includes the harassment and assault. However, he has a moment of attempted gentleness/conditioning when he question her about the mouthwash when she's contemplating drinking it at the table. The key difference is he has no personal investment in Jimmy outside wanting nothing to do with him, meaning there is no sort of romanticized version of him that he can condition her off of. He knows this, hence, why he always reverts to trying to make her to scared to oppose him.
This sort of give and take of "kindness" doesn't work on her because she knows he is just doing it to take more from her than whatever he could possibly give but it reflects even the "softer" scenes between him and Curly where he always rewords or rephrases Curly's sentiments and concerns to sound more shallow. He is feigning a deeper understanding by reworking Curly's emotions into something bad and needing to be hidden. Everything is laced with envy and resentment, an outburst just around the corner, I mean he even slams the table in the birthday party scene, a tactic in emotional manipulation to set the victim on edge and cloud their ability to respond. Even if Curly knows Jimmy won't get physical in that moment, the physical actions is intended to make him back down in the confrontation in case it does. This is something that is just not person specific. It ingrains itself into how you interact with the world and life and it shows in major and minor ways with Curly.
Post-crash, the abusive nature is more in tandem to the physical victimization Anya went through and the stripping of voice and autonomy we see take place. Like the parasite in HFIM, Jimmy speaks for Curly most of the time and puts words in his mouth, similarly to how he takes Anya's plans as his own. He very commonly, with the both of them mind you, supplements the worst aspects of himself into them; pettiness, selfishness, lack of understanding... And tries to cover himself with their best qualities; kindness, planning, initiative, etc...
These parallel are just to say that positional power has little to do with if a person can be abused and how it can even be flipped to further the abuse. There is no doubt that Curly could've picked up on Jimmy's envy of his position hence another reason he never confronted him as a Captain but as a friend as doing so would immediately put Jimmy in a space to be confrontational/combative.
I think the disdain some people have when they talk about the heavily implied if not implicitly stated emotional/mental abuse Curly experienced being Jimmy's friend is when treating it as an excuse to why he didn't do more. I can understand that completely because it is not an excuse to why he didn't do more but is a very real reason people in his position in these scenarios can experience whether in the context of a work or social environment. However, I also think the way people talk about it really does demonstrate a bigger problem when talking about abuse when somehow who is/was abused is either part of the issue or enabled it.
Harkening back to the sentiments about Curly's inaction regarding Jimmy, I think the exact phrases I used/have seen show how there is an inherent belief that it is easier to overpower the effects of emotional/mental abuse that go in tandem with the perception of Curly as someone who should be able to. There is not an age you suddenly stop being susceptible to abuse nor a set point or low where you realize how it has affected you. You don't suddenly know to stand up or put a face on to face your abuser nor admit that you inadvertently enabled them to subjugate someone else to the same treatment. Maybe it's my psych brain but their is this growing belief that direct action is somehow easy or always the best method with the game shows you instances where it is not always the case. In real life that rings true too. He should have done more, but it's not impossible to see why he struggled to find a way or didn't even if it makes us mad.
It's not easy to suddenly gain a "back-bone". You don't immediately want to resort to aggression, especially if it mirrors the type you were a victim to. You don't want to believe you allowed yourself to be treated this bad, let it get that bad or allowed something bad to happen to someone else. It is easy to be in denial, to retreat to your thoughts or make excuses to avoid the painful truth. It's frustrating but in a way we know is relatable. It why we both hate and love Curly for it. We know we'd be better, we think we'd be better, we like to think we wouldn't falter in the same ways but it's always easier to say that from the outside looking in. It's easy to see what he was doing wrong because we are seeing it, not him, but the game really does make you picture what you would do if this was your raw reality and it's why this debate about Curly seems so never ending/contradictory. We can all say what we'd do but bottom line is that's much different when you're in the moment with all the emotions and human feelings attached.
I personally think Mouthwashing tackles the themes of rape culture, enabling, toxic masculinity, types of abuse and patriarchy in ways that are meant to deconstruct the typical straightforward views we mostly have of these concepts and how little subtilities of them are just as, if not more, detrimental than the overt/obvious parts. The game deals with the idea of little details and bigger picture in a way to show that sometimes the bigger picture is not the issue but the little details that make it up. It's why I have a personal dislike of depictions of Jimmy as the typical horrible person who would of course do something like this because the game is about noticing the little warning signs, the foreshadowing and foresight.
It's why I dislike the typical discussion of "bro code" and "boys will be boys" for the game because the game makes a point to avoid the standard depictions of such. It is about the type of men who still enable despite not condoning, agreeing or even perpetuating harmful beliefs because they can't see the little details or the ways it seeps into their everyday. The severity is not obvious to them as it was not obvious to Curly, Swansea or even Daisuke the way it was to a woman like Anya. There are little details about Jimmy that should ring alarms but if you are too naive like Daisuke, too distant like Swansea or too conditioned like Curly, they are just off markers.
There is 100% more constructive/concise ways to say "Curly was a victim of Jimmy's abuse on an emotional and mental aspect that clouded his judgements and perceptions in the scenario" while also critiquing on the side of "Curly still had a responsibility to protect Anya as a crew mate and Captain that he failed to do due to biases and stigma's he failed to surpass" without the weird condemnation people give him about should've knowing better than to let himself be manipulated by a person he considered a close, if not family/best-friend and had his own reasons to trust initially. Also stop being weird about victims of abuse in general with this fandom, like sorry not everyone has a like social epiphany the moment someone's nasty to them. People are treating it like you immediately know when you are in a toxic relationship immediately or comprehend when a person is actively dangerous and either it's your fault for not knowing how to leave/cut them off or you deserve it. Like the hypocrisy of people believing how certain fans treat the story reflect their irl views but not their own is crazy.
End statement is: I honestly don't even know man, I've been writing this too long and just like no man on that ship was perfect or really helped Anya when it mattered and I feel like pitting them against each other in discussion on who did the least or most or how it was justified sucks cause in the end Anya always did the most and best thing for herself.
#i also think it is because mouthwashing is first and foremost a game about rape culture and the patriarchy especially in work spaces#regarding women and centering conversation around Curly a man rubs people wrong because it does overshadow that commentary#but it still mixes other topics into its initial theming and message on how abuse conditions you to accept certain things that are harmful#and how getting used to a culture/enviornment does not mean you are happy healthy or most importantly safe in it. I personally like to#explore those aspects where it mixes all the themes so we can discuss the ways you have to watch out for things because there is a differen#in the idea Curly enabled Jimmy just because they were bros and because he was an example of another man afraid to step out from what#is a still oppressive system that does try to punish those who act against it even if they fall in the category of those who would benefit#from it as Jimmy and PE 100% represent that sort of misogynistic system where men that would be “good” are altered until they follow line#in a way both on the personal and professional level as PE is the corporate lock out and Jimmy represents the social and its just the issue#that the discussion of it sounds like “in defense of men” when I am more so trying to discuss how it is much deeper than men being scared t#upset other men but complacency is rewarded by not becoming another person subjugated hence as all the moments Curly does try to do#something we can tie it back to how Jimmy reacts and a possible penality from PE where we now need to address the ways to combat those#two concepts so we dont get cases like Curly or Daisuke or Swansea where male avoidance of the issue is considered neutral or even good.#i think most of this boils down the perfect victim mentality to where if someone who underwent or is being abused is not a perfect example#or accpetible type than their abuse can not be considered a valid or substantial reason for effects on their behavior compounded with the#fact that Anya's abuse at the hands of Jimmy is a systematic issue that Curly is a part of even if unwillingly and was more physically#violating and topical cause sometimes i have to remind myself that all media is still critiqued through the lens of the culture it came out#in cause i do think about what if this game came out inlike 2014 like the conversations would be sooooooo different could you imagine it?#but back the before statement Curly isn't perfect but I feel like boiling it down if hes a good person or man is not the point of the game#but more so good people can still be part of the problem and the idea of condemning a person for one act creates a false sense of#rightouesness and justice that does not aid the victim and in fact aids the abusers in escaping blame for their mulitple behaviors as we se#how the men on the ship tend to blame Jimmy for just one act against them including himself while there is a plethora of things Anya is#concerned about with Jimmy#and its not that Curly just made one mistake with Jimmy but more so we consider his actions more damning because he didn't stop Jimmy#instead of focusing on the fact Jimmy did what he did regardless of Curly and the consequence because we already know he's bad n maladjuste#which is problem in the conversation where the individuals are blamed but the system and perputrator are overlooked in a sense of acceptiab#complacency as we know how they are and the lack of tangibility to personally affect them on a larger scale like I should just make a post#on like cutting out the face when it comes it confronting systems of oppression rather than tag talking but just ask me to clarify if#you want that like im jus trying to say we avoid talking about Jimmy and PE so much cause it is obvious what they do wrong that we make#the initial and inherent problem out to be one aspect someone in this case Curly does and the the constraints they use to force actions
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Just to throw my two cents on the Rat Grinder discourse: They weren't worth the Intrepid Heroes' time. We didn't get the full picture of what's going on with the Grinders until the last quarter of the season. Before that they were just this other clique that hate the main characters, so in-character why would the Bad Kids bother giving them so much attention when they've got so much of their own crap going on. Kristens quest to get Cassandra back and her presidential campaign, Gorgugs courseload, Riz's million and one plates that he's been spinning all season, Adaines financial problems, Figs curse and her doubts about what she wants to do with her life. Fabian's the only one who might have had the time, but he had to be Maximum Legend. There genuinely was no time or even an incentive on the IH's side to develop the Rat Grinders characters.
I still think it's fucked up that these teenagers got taken advantage of by adults they trusted, but we didn't learn any of that until we only had two roleplay episodes left. Too little too late to even try anything diplomatic even if they didn't spend all their time after the Last Stand in hiding.
And a thing about Ivy that no one is roasting her about and really should: An elven archer? Really? Wow, never seen that before.
Yeah totally. Like, from a meta level, I see where the players themselves could have been more curious about the Rat Grinders. There are obvious plot threads that could have been teased out there (though, in fairness to the cast, the adult manipulation aspect didn't become clear until way later in the season--the rivalry and foil aspects were more obvious). This final confrontation could look really different if they'd played that all the way out all season.
But in character? The Bad Kids really didn't have a good reason to waste time on the Rat Grinders. They came into this school year already burnt out from their Night Yorb quest and wanting a break. But they don't get that because they immediately are beset by problems they have to deal with--Kristen's god is on death's door from neglect and she's on the brink of expulsion, Riz is running himself ragged trying to boost his resume for college, Fig is having a whole ass existential crisis, Adaine is struggling with money issues she doesn't want to talk about, Gorgug is taking FOUR YEARS of school at the same time, and Fabian is multiclassing and dealing with his empty house/not having parental support (or Cathilda's support) for the first time. They are dealing with SO MUCH high stakes, personal stuff before the plot even kicks in. And, mechanics-wise, this is represented with the downtime system that means that any time they spend on the RG's is time they can't spend on something that matters more to them. IMO, not prioritizing your haters is actually pretty mature. Like, they weren't proactively using their free time to bully them or anything (except for arguably Fig). They were snippy with them when they crossed their paths and that was it. As opposed to the Rat Grinders who literally had to be told by Jace to stop antagonizing the Bad Kids (though they must have been pretty ineffectual at it because the Bad Kids hardly noticed, which I bet stung considering they were so obsessed).
And also, it's not like they didn't try at all with the Rat Grinders. Early Insight checks on Kipperlilly just got, "This is a polished steel orb of a personality" which doesn't sound very worth interacting with in a sympathetic way if at all and then the next big thing they learn is that she had hated Riz since Freshman Year and that she wants Riz and Kristen dead. And that's AFTER we saw her smile and kill her party cleric. In their position I'm not spending further time trying to empathize with this person, I have made my judgement and it's up to the Jawbones of the world to find if there's something in there to be rehabilitated.
And that's not the only case. Adaine straight up saved Ruben from disintegration during the Frosty Folk battle when she easily could have saved the spell slot, but that didn't soften him towards the Bad Kids any. Adaine also was really keen to Scry on the Rat Grinders to find out what was happening at their meetings. But, in scene at least, she was never able to do that so we never got a scene of them, huddled together, clearly unsure about the path they're on but not feeling like they can walk it back or say no to the authority figures in their lives. She didn't get anything humanizing that would cause her to rethink their position on them the way that she did with Aelwyn for instance. So why would they think they're anything but gleeful co-conspirators?
Hell, the one RG Adaine was even slightly curious about was Oisin and now we know that he was feigning interest in her which, man, can you imagine how much worse that would have felt if she'd actually taken the bait and pursued him beyond just thinking he was cute? Of course, it's possible that her interacting with him more along with some good charm rolls could have changed the narrative in some way but we can only go off of what we know to be true in canon and those facts are (1) He tried to get closer to Adaine while actively planning the downfall of her and her friends, (2) he (along with Ivy) was mean to Buddy behind his back while tricking him into a plan that would force him to go against his religious beliefs, and (3) he called his KVX related dragon ancestors to try to kill the Bad Kids and endanger the entire student body population. Three strikes, you're out. If I'm a Bad Kid I'm not super interested in whatever else is going on with him. And again, literally all of Adaine's friends (except Riz) gave her help to do an Insight check on him during their confrontation in the hallway so she was looking for something there worth engaging with, but she didn't get much.
Fig was fully doing CIA, MKUltra, Fantasy Geneva Convention violations on Ruben to try see if she could get information or flip him. I think she did it in an objectively insane way so I'm not entirely shocked that it didn't yield the exact results she was looking for. But she never found the smoking gun (or whatever the opposite of that is) in his head that would absolve him/show the Rat Grinders were being controlled and her messing with his dreams never flared his conscience enough to make him try to break free (as far as we know) which is what I assume she was going for. If I was Ruben looking for a way out but scared of the repercussions, I might go to Adaine who saved me from certain death earlier the same year and has helped saved the world 3 times with her party and their friends in high (and low) places. Maybe that's what Fig thought might happen but it didn't so from Fig's POV? Gave him a chance. Time to start blasting. And again, at that age, if I walked in to the first day of class and the first thing this random boy does is sneer at me and flaunt his musical success, I'm popping up on his Nemesis Alert at that moment. Doubly so after he tries to trick me and my friends into doing drugs so we get expelled. I'm surprised she tried at all with him.
Fabian absolutely tried to interact with Ivy--in large part for self interested reasons of course, but that doesn't change that he did it. And she came across as callous and unkind from the jump. Their final conversation before the latest episode is the one where she talks about wearing Mazey like a sweater and then says that Fabian missed his chance with her before stalking off. That's a pretty open and shut interaction. No way 17 year old me is like, "Hmm, but why is she acting so mean? Perhaps I should examine that more closely to further understand her." Nah, I've decided she sucks.
And Kristen has tried with Buddy literally up until the last moment. She rolled an Insight check on him right before the fight started and she got a 1. She got nothing from him.
Mary Ann is actually the only Rat Grinder who hasn't done anything to make a bad impression on the Bad Kids--the only thing she did was have a really good Bloodrush tryout. So no reason to hate her specifically (and, in fact, she is also the only Rat Grinder that at least half of them are positively obsessed with), but no reason to explore her further. And Kristen still tried giving her a stuffed animal and her response was that she already had that one and that she was going to give it away. What are they supposed to do with that?
Even when they tried, they didn't get information that was worth chasing when they were so busy and had to manage their free time. Gorgug didn't even slot in downtime to talk to his bio parents when they visited. Why would he spend any time on Mary Ann to figure out her deal? Maybe if they were given more explicit opportunities to interact with them in passing. If Mary Ann was shown at Bloodrush Games. If during class time Oisin tried to interact with Adaine. If Kristen ran into Buddy and Bucky talking. If any of their forays into talking to them or looking into them yielded anything actionable or that piqued their interest--they opened the door for Brennan to give them something more than once. But they never got anything that was worth investing more of their limited time into.
(And also, they didn't learn that Porter was involved until WAY into the last quarter of the episodes. Which absolutely could have changed things since, as far as they knew the RG's were working alone to raise this god which isn't crazy for them to think because Kristen literally did that last year and it was of her own free will. If they knew early that the RG's were smaller players in Porter's plot then maybe they would have been in more of a rescue mindset--especially since Fig has always mistrusted him--but that's not information they had and by the time they got it, the RG's were in deep hiding, like you said.)
And so, coming into the last few episodes, that's who the Rat Grinders are to the Bad Kids. A group of kids who they first heard about in the context of, "they famously hate you," even though they'd never interacted before. A group of kids who they already thought sucked even before they tried to kill the entire study body an hour ago. A group of kids who are trying to doom all of Elmville to eternal rage and who are willing and ready to kill them to do it.
With that context, yeah I think their actions are pretty understandable.
(Also, lmao. Yeah, I think calling Ivy basic would probably hurt her more than most things you could say to her.)
#asks#farmer-10#dimension 20#fantasy high#d20#spoilers#d20 spoilers#dimension 20 spoilers#dimension 20 fhjy#fhjy#and they knew the rage crystals existed for a while#but they had no reason to believe that the rage crystals are a thing that happened *to* the RG's#rather than being a thing that they're doing to others#so like yeah I totally get it wishing that they players had delved deeper into their whole situations#that's the fun of narrative foils after all#but I don't think the bad kids themselves handled this situation unreasonably#when ppl rub me the wrong way/are rude to me irl I avoid them#if they have hidden struggles that's between them and their loved ones and their therapist#and if I was a bad kid after such a stressful year even if I heard their tragic backstories at this point I'd be like#cool motive still murder
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There are two wolves inside u: One wants to write a lengthy bitch post about everyone fighting since the tickets went on sale and the other one is just sad they’re never going to do a tour like this for Danger Days cause it would never sell.
#mcr#I just don’t think it’s fair to get parasocially mad bc one other band has fought the monopoly so bad it’s under investigation by the feds#and just so happened to win#and the overplayed comments just rub me the wrong way cause#the only other acceptable era to do is three cheers#if it was bullets or danger days ppl would ask why it wasn’t black parade or three cheers#and I know it’s fair to be sad or disappointed or upset bc u feel like this was a new turn in the bands behavior#but I miss when we were excited. cause I’m still excited!#and I don’t feel like the reasons to be excited went away nor were they overshadowed by anything we weren’t expecting from launch
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To whoever made the creative decision for Aizen's characterization this season: Congrats, you've achieved the impossible. You've managed to turn me into an Aizen girlie.
#well not really lmao#i think it just feels that way to me because of my own character development. we've come a long way.#i used to haaaaate him#like not love to hate. just straight up hate hate.#like fake karakura town arc? when he just kept talking for like fifteen episodes?? i just wanted him to shut the fuck up already XD#and then yhw//ach showed up and i was like:#........... i retract all my previous statements please bring aizen back aizen come pick up me i'm scared#sorry not sorry but our og villain did it better you wish you were him#add to that the fact that he was right (i always knew he was right about soul society but then when we saw the soul king)#(and what kyo//raku admitted in the light novel)#(that was a whole other level of him being right)#plus i'm older now so#i can now see and acknowledge that one of the reasons he rubbed me so wrong is that we'reactuallytoomuchalike#(don't tell my sis that she was right all those years ago XD)#so yes. he's not a fave but i've accepted him 😔#and he's still not a fave but i never thought i'd be invested the way the past two episodes made me#so props to whoever did that lmao#withoutwords
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*long, deep, belabored sigh*
#discourse#<- except not really bc i am vagueing#idk im just tired. and sad#for a lot of reasons. some of which are i think v much not the reasons other ppl are mad rn lmao#like. yes it has problems yes i wish it could be better yes this absolutely sucks shit#and that is all v much part of the reason i am tired and sad#but the constant neg abt every aspect of the server also has started grinding on me. well always has i think im just reaching a limit#bc i like it! i do! theres good parts and i like them a whole lot!#idk it just rubs me the wrong way bc even if i do agree with a lot of the criticism whenever it comes from this side of the community#it always kinda feels like its in bad faith to me. like its in desire to watch it burn first and actually improve anything second#and its just like. argh#and like on the flip side. god i love this server but why does it have to be run by a guy who is the way he is#negative#yeah i think this needs that tag too lmao#idk ive been thinking abt taking a break for a little bit here and i dont think i am#mostly bc it would involve unfollowing 90% of my mutuals and i dont really want to do that#but i just wish casually sticking around like this didnt also involve. all the bullshit that comes with being in this fandom(s). lol. lmao.#anyways. i am going to go eat dinner
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#i don’t wanna get jumped so i’ll censor this but i have opinions#so much of what * have done in these past few months has caused i*llit to get so much undeserved hate and i gotta confess that because of it#* is starting to rub me off the wrong way#and i understand the brainwashing that went into it so i am not hating or mad or anything of the sort#but i am a little :/#they’ve been doing so much with that greeting situation and first of all i think they are pushing it and showcasing their naivety#but other than that all the attention they’ve been bringing to it has caused i*it to get so much hate for no reason#and i dont even know that group but i think it’s surreal for u to make such a big deal of how u were ‘bullied’ (which we could discuss at#length) and then do things that only cause people to jump another group that has absolutely nothing to do with the situation#and all for that damn hag#like fuck all the adults first and foremost but u should also not make the situation worse for somebody else who has nothing to do with it#the comms major in me hates this so bad#i dont wanna say things i may regret but im slightly annoyed
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i’m all for people having their diff headcanons for characters but some people have such a visceral disgust for the concept of spock being attracted to women and it makes my bi nose wrinkle
#...not just a concept either. there are three main spocks and they've all expressed attraction to women#does that mean i'm against ppl hc-ing him as gay? fuck no. have fun!#but holy shit some of you guys are MEAN about it#plus i've been thru plenty of people being awful to ppl who ship him with women#(the way ppl used to treat spock/uhura shippers is deplorable. legit fucking bullying)#so it extra rubs me the wrong way because of that#anyways yeah i see spock as a bi. i think it suits his character in terms of themes too#im not gonna Force people to see things my way. i just don't like seeing people be dicks to each other for no reason#also haven't we as a fandom evolved past the ''ewww het is gross!'' phase yet. some of y'all taking me back to 2007 i swear
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Common Misconceptions: A Post
Henry is an adrenaline junkie.
Nah. He is a risk-taker, but not a risk-seeker. He will take risks to get to a desirable end result but he does not seek out ways to put himself at risk for the sake of the thrill. He does like adventure, but adventure doesn't have to mean life-at-risk. If anything that's an unfortunate side effect. Also worth noting that Henry (though often underestimated) is capable, experienced, and confident in his knowledge and abilities: there are things he does which other people consider dangerous that are, by virtue of his experience, not actually a significant risk to his person. Many of the places he occupies have some level of risk inherent to them that he is fully equipped to navigate. Henry's cautious is the common man's uninhibited, in these places. Because of his knowledge & experience, his scale is different. Sometimes he misjudges! but it's not his ambition to make things a close call. In fact, the really close ones shake him up in a bad way.
Henry is a Martyr/has a Savior Complex.
False!! In his words: "he'll never stop" fighting for his loved ones. Sometimes this means taking hits, or putting himself between them and something dangerous, or stepping into a bad situation on their behalf, but it's never his intention to be cut down or any such thing. He, emphatically, wants to live, he just really doesn't want to do it alone, and can't stomach the idea of standing idle when people he loves face threat or insult. A way to shorthand remember this is something like "he is not him-last, he is his-people-first." Another important way to distinguish this from martyr-styled characters is he will not (typically) tell people to leave without him. He may encourage them to go first, but it is always with the intent to follow them out. "Go first" can be an inch in front of him, hands locked, just go first. Additionally, his family have just as much right to come back and fight for him — he won't decline help or a rescue, and he really doesn't want to be left behind. He wants everyone, himself included, to walk away.
Henry has a Hero Complex.
Not even a little bit. He absolutely does not have to be the one to save the day. Anyone else is just as welcome to do what they see fit, in this regard. And they can make as much or as little fuss about it as they want. As long as he does what he can for the people he loves, it does not matter to him one bit where the 'credit' or the praise or whatever else goes. If they are well, he is well. Honestly, if his people aren't in danger, it's a coin toss whether or not he'll involve himself at all (barring verses where it's his literal job to get involved, obviously.) In every case, it has nothing to do with external perception or accolade or praise, it's entirely because he cannot self-reconcile inaction when it comes to defending his loved ones (/people he is responsible for.) He's not answering to a perception, he's answering to his own conscience. Not "I have to save everyone in the world" savior or "I have get all the glory" hero, but to and with himself "If I can do something to help, why wouldn't I?". There are answers to this question, sometimes. Mostly, if the response to "why wouldn't I?" is "because it will endanger/abandon someone I love", then he won't act. He might not be happy about it, or even be very miserable about it, but that's the main line.
Henry is a perfectionist. (thanks uquiz)
Nope. Henry is an idealist, and to a lesser degree an optimist, or like... an optimism-leaning realist. He wants problems to be solvable, though he knows they aren't always so cut and dry, and he has an imagined version of the world that he believes is possible to achieve. He works very hard to get to that version! but it's not a fixed state and things don't have to fall into some strict order to achieve it. There is no perfect standard and no uniform measure, no exact thing-to-do, there is just Possibility, and the idea he can get to it. Things can be so good, if you work for it. If you let them. Nothing has to be perfect, but if something could be better, why not try?
#i was digging on my old blog for reasons (dwbi) and i found this and i went YEAH so i touched it up n now its here#good post past-me#there's a light that never goes out ( hc. )#note: i can see! how people arrive at these though!! i think the first time i posted this a couple people got rubbed the wrong way#but like i fully get how people land on these it makes sense it's just that nudge of nuance that argues it#i think the martyr/savior complex one is the one i bump into the most but i simply do not think it's like that#no self-sabotage only uplift of others (because he's got the strength)
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Can some inclus maybe stop acting like identifying as a gaybian is the new, cooler, "more queer version" of identifying as "just" (boring old) bisexual :^)
#obviously this doesn't apply to all inclus or ppl who genuinely do not identify as bisexual 😭#but I feel like a lot of ppl use lesbian/gay as synonymous with bisexual now which rubs me the wrong way#there's a distinction between monosexual and multisexual identities for a reason#and it is important to me and many other bisexuals who do not identify with being lesbian or veldian/gay#I also feel like people prioritise saying lesbian over sapphic and veldian/gay over achillean#like sapphic/achillean are objectively more inclusive terms especially for multisexual individuals#but people will always just say lesbian/gay and assume that is inclusive of all bisexuals when it's Not#idk#I just often feel like bisexuality is somewhat treated as an afterthought in the inclus community#I think 'people can identify however they want'#and 'some people will go out of their way to avoid labelling themselves as bisexual' (because of [internalised] biphobia)#can co-exist#SHRUGS#luka rambles
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Thank God I'm not the only one who did Not like Paintbrush's EXIT interview. Like wtf was that???? They were so ooc?? Why did they change their personality so much I do not like it I'm sorry..
Also not them saying the Bright Lights was the best team they've been on?? The "og fam" as if their experience in that team wasn't hell for them. Majority of their time in that team was them getting pissed off at their teammates and being misgendered by the other contestants.
The only thing I can think of that could possibly make Paintbrush even consider Bright Lights being the best team is they were in that team whenever they came out as non binary, and it wasn't even like they came out to everyone in the team, it was just to Lightbulb. Plus they were eliminated that same episode.
I'd think The Thinkers (hell maybe even The New Pinkers) would've been their favorite. They seemed to have the most fun there PLUS nobody misgendered them (except for technically Yang?? But he immediately corrected himself, which was nice). Ofc Silver Spoon exists, but even they had their moments together. I dunno, felt like they just made them say the Bright Lights cause that team's a fan favorite and for nostalgia points.
Also not someone asking what their opinion on kitkats is--chances are ae doesn't know why that question was asked considering how Paintbrush responded. Oh, I wonder if they'll find out...
Anywayz ae did Paintbrush dirty in their EXIT interview and I'll forever be disappointed. Paintbrush I'm so sorry you deserved so much better💔💔
#ngl it was kinda hard for me to get through#I don't even remember if I made it through the whole thing tbh..#but I made it far enough I think#I'm not in the osc anymore btw but I do wanna keep up with the shows like tpot and ii#which is why I wanted to try and watch Paintbrush's exit interview#and it sux#sorry painty#ALSO#episode 14.. ..... I don't like it that much#the nickel and balloon conflict is just annoying GOD DO YOU HATE EACH OTHER OR NOT???#PICK ONE JEEZUS#cabby and bot's interactions rubbed me the wrong way#I feel like they meant for it to be wholesome but it just kinda gave me the ick#CABBY. HAS. MEMORY ISSUES#SHE HAS THOSE FILES FOR A REASON???#and bot giving her false information was just awful#��if you forget I'll just tell you again! 😊😊😊” BOT THANKS I GUESS?? BUT I DON'T THINK YOU UNDERSTAND#them interacting would've been so interesting but ae ruined it I'm so sad :( cabby my girl I'm so sorry you deserve better#anywayz I rambled sorry#ae what are you doing#literally. what#I'm not even in the osc anymore I shouldn't be so passionate abt this#I'm going back to my stick corner sorry#ii neg#I still enjoy ii don't get me wrong#but honestly. I think I'm too blinded by nostalgia to really see all that's wrong with the show#bcz I started watching it when I was rlly young#OKAY I'M DONE NOW#I have a few mutuals who also like ii if you see this I'm so sorry#💬
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p sure everyone has at least one tumblr meme they vehemently loathe but yeah for me it’s “if you even care”
I absolutely will straight up not reblog a post I was going to bc it has that phrase on it, or if I do it’s only bc otherwise the post was really fuckign good
don’t get me wrong it’s not like I actually am upset if I see it (otherwise I’d filter it) but also I am killing it with hammers. biting violence etc etc
#this is meant in a lighthearted way#though the bit about not reblogging is true lol#I just. he no like the banana#but also no judgement if you do lol it’s just a meme#like yeah the reason I don’t like it is probably bc it is a joke guilt trip#but that also doesn’t mean that I think it’s at all equivalent to a real guilt trip??????#just that even in a joking context it rubs me personally the wrong way#but that doesn’t mean it can’t be funny to other people#456 words
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Y'all need to stop with the felon shit, you just look stupid.
#my post#likeeeee y'all can't pick any other talking points?#hate the guy too but 'how can a FELON run for president??' is not the talking point you think it is#to be clear I am not like. defending Trump or anything. business fraud is bad#so don't put words in my mouth over this#but look... quite literally every man in my family is a felon(for various reasons) and it just?? rubs me the wrong way#y'all add acab to your post but cannot kill the cop in your head- kill the prison ward too!!#christ I have not slept in 40 hours so this may be unintelligible but I hope I at least somewhat made my point#just like... you cannot pretend to give af about these issues if they become irrelevant once you can make it 'ironic'#this rhetoric does not suddenly become good or even funny when you get to spin it around y'know?#again do not gaf abt Trump personally this is moreso about the wider implications
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woah,,, bad decision star real?! /silly
-mod toast
Don't idolize me lol
Obviously I make bad decisions
Do I try to be a good influence? Yeah
Do I also make bad choices and sometimes not care? Yeah
This is a bad decision, and you shouldn't be following my example /srs
That being said
I'm going to bed now
So gn
#ik youre joking and probably dont idolize me#but tbh its kinda something thats been on mh mind for a bit#i dont think im worth idolizing#but i do try to be a very positive influence#so others have someone to look up to.#that being said#i dont like jokes abt me not being perfect#or being surprised if i make bad choices#bc its something i struggle with#in terms of trying to not idolize myself#and expect myself to be perfect#idk#im rambling#but just#yeah#keep that in mind#i like being looked up to#but just. yeah#not perfect (no one is)#only reason im bringing this up is bc it did kinda rub me the wrong way#sorry#ill stop now#important
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