#i think its pointless anyway because we are more than capable of accounting for people like that and covering for it

[gothmods]

The thing about discourse around the mythical ~person who is fully capable of working but chooses to do nothing~

Is having met people who could be pegged as such, they don't just spawn out of the ether.

There are factors throughout their life that shape them.

And frankly i think focusing on their lack of contribution is focusing on the wrong issue entirely. Not just in that i think there are factors in their early lives that should have been adressed, but also like

If you take any discussion of early preventative methods off of the table. If you look at it strictly in the here and now, people who seemingly lack any motivation to be productive or engage with the world around them, well they tend to neglect a lot more than just work.

And if someone is neglecting the basic tasks in their daily lives, the people around them, the wellbeing of their kids, their own wellbeing etc etc its so pointless to hone your focus in on merely whether or not they are laboring to the level you think they can.

Like sorry but there are more pressing issues here

[biot08]

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Ysayle took to her feet, startled, as she heard a loud metallic thud behind her. As she turned, she caught sight of the source of the noise.

One of the knights of Ishgard, judging from the heavy armor and the shield and the way they moved. The mysterious interloper was a tall Elezen, with purple-highlighted short-cropped hair and light brown skin. And just this moment, they were standing up next to the startled sentry who was supposed to be keeping an eye out for that sort of thing.

Not that the sentry could be blamed, really. Nobody could have anticipated that even an adventurer would be fool enough to jump from the cliff face that made up one side of their encampment, but they had, and there she was. Ysayle frowned. Such a loud entrance for a single person didn’t make any sense. Surely they would know that any advantage of surprise such a maneuver would get them would be swiftly blunted by sheer force of opposing numbers.

The sentry had been startled, and was only starting to recover their wits, reaching for a spear. The knight did not give them any such chance, as she rose from her crouch and drove the shield into them, bodily slamming them up against the cliff wall. With a pained noise, they dropped their spear. Seeing their quarry still conscious, the knight proceeded to follow up by slamming her shoulder into the back of her shield, hard. The sentry’s head slammed back into the cliff, bouncing off of it, and the knight helped them finish their journey to the ground by hitting them in the now-exposed back of the head with the pommel of her sword.

The sentry sunk to the ground, unconscious. The knight looked down at them for a long moment, then carefully stepped over the unconscious sentry, walking towards Ysayle, shield up, but sword pointed downward.

Next to Ysayle, another guard, who had been helping her take account of the crystals they had gathered thus far, edged forward cautiously, spear in hand. Ysayle held a hand out towards them as though to bar their way, and shook her head just the tiniest amount. The person looked up, a questioning look on their face, but they halted, and waited.

“Hail, knight of Ishgard,” Ysayle called out, her voice as clear as always.

“What? Oh. Oh! Right. Sorry, no. Just an adventurer. Adventurer-type. I’m from the Scions. Former knight though. House Vauban? We held one of the minor outposts near here for generations.”

The adventurer was calm, conversational. Ysayle found herself momentarily off guard at the brashness, but outwardly, her composure never wavered. She frowned, clenching a fist.

When she spoke, her voice contained velvety venom, and obvious disdain. “And what do you hope to gain here, former knight? Are you hoping to regain your title through glorious combat? Blood to water your supposed honor with?” Ysayle shifted the arm she was holding up to signal her guard to stay back, preparing to give him an entirely different signal.

“One week.”

“…what?”

“Yeah, sorry, wanted to get that bit out fast before you had your man there start in with the jabbing. About a week, that’s what I’m hoping to gain here. That’s how long Lord Drillemont thinks he’ll need to get the place fully evacuated. Snowcloak’s a lot of territory. Well, actually, he wanted two, but you people seem really good at getting crystals together.”

Former knight Vauban swept her gaze around the camp, looking at the boxes of crystals that Ysayle and her followers had already gathered. “… really good. Wow, that’s, what, a quarter of what you had last time? Already?”

Ysayle waved her hand at the remaining guard, dismissing them. The guard frowned in response, but did not question her, placing their spear on their back and walking away, leaving Ysayle and the adventurer alone. “… you are not among those who I faced last time.”

“No. Sorry. But we talk to each other, you know. It’s different, outside of Ishgard. People are less guarded, we talk to each other more. Our particular gift is not common, but it seems it’s maybe not extremely rare, either? You know. There’s a number of us. Small, exclusive club. Some of us are kind of tight knit about it. Sorry. I’m rambling. Anyway, I asked to take point on this one. So here I am.”

The knight found a box of crystals that still had its lid on it, and helped herself to sit down on it, resting her hand on the sword hilt with its tip in the ground. Still holding her shield.

Ysayle regarded the knight cooly for a long moment. “So what is the point of all these theatrics, then? If it is not blood you seek, then what? Parley?”

“Sure, let’s go with that. I mean, sort of. Well, not really. Part of it was I wanted to prove I still knew the area as well as I thought I did. You and your people have done a good job, exploiting the tunnel and ravine network. I’m impressed. Though, uh, that route that your caravan with the latest load of crystals is taking to get here? It’s so smooth on top because it’s just an ice sheet over what used to be a river ravine. Fast to travel over, generally.”

The knight leaned her sword against the box for a moment to dig around in a bag. Finding what she wanted, she pulled out an alchemical flask, and rolled it on the ground towards Ysayle.

“… Hearth’s Warmth.”

“Yeah. Common enough. You know the sort, right? Good replacement for a campfire if your wood’s garbage or you can’t find any tinder. Nice, gentle heat, spreads everywhere, scales up well. Make the right batch and arrange it right, you can heat an entire fort for a sennight. Place it in the right place in some underground ravine tunnels, and you can really mess up an ice sheet.”

Ysayle’s gaze snapped from the flask to the former knight’s face, clenching a fist and beginning to take a step forward. “The caravan-!”

“Is fine. Will be fine. Unless they’re a lot faster than I think they were. They’ll have to go around, though. It’ll take some time. Few days. Maybe even a week.”

Ysayle’s glare was fit to melt the ice the adventurer was talking about all by itself. Her hands were in fists, now. Violence seemed like it would almost be pointless. She could always summon the guard back, and all of the guard’s compatriots that would be elsewhere in the camp. For her part, the adventurer did not see to be very much bothered by the fact that she was, in fact, sitting in the center of a very dangerous position to be in.

“You said ‘part’,” said Ysayle, slowly, annunciating each word for a kind of emphasis.

“Oh yeah. Other part. I should let you know, while we’re just talking, I’ve got friends behind me, and a little thing in my back that’ll make it easier for them to travel the streams to get here. I… I don’t think I want to fight you though, Lady Iceheart. It is Lady Iceheart, right?”

Ysayle stepped back out of combat stance, standing tall, statuesque. “Lady Iceheart. Yes. I am the leader of the heretics, if that is who you seek. As I am certain you have heard, I harbor the spirit of Shiva, reborn, if that is what you came here to ask me.”

The knight was quiet for a long moment, and turned her gaze away, to look down at the ground a little bit away from her. She rubbed her fingers idly, seeming to be suddenly uncomfortable.

“You seem to be a lot of things to a lot of people, you know. Of course you know. You’re more than just a person. Even more so now, that you’ve demonstrated that neat trick with the Shiva manifestation or … whatever you want to cal it. I don’t want to argue about that, let me have that, never mind that. The point is, you know… you’re a symbol. People believe in you.”

“They are right to do so. I accept Ishgard’s tired and weary and unwanted all in kind. I accept those who want to see an end to this pointless bloodshed. Know this true, former-knight of House Vauban. I will see an end to this war.”

“Yeah? And the tired and weary of Stormcloak?”

Ysayle took a deep breath in, and let it out slow. “Unfortunate but necessary.”

The knight looked up at Ysayle, and then gestured at the place where the guard used to be. “Noticed you sent the guard away. If you hadn’t, we might not be having this conversation at all. But you did.”

“I do not spill blood needlessly, nor let it be spent on my behalf without cause, adventurer. Not every problem needs to be solved with your kinds’ particular brand of overwhelming violence. And if it does,” and at this Ysayle stood up a little taller, “I am capable of delivering it myself.”

“Yeah. Admirable, I guess,” said the knight. She still looked uncomfortable, and had not stopped fidgeting.

“…my cousin looked up to you. I don’t imagine you’d know him from anyone else, but he looked up to you. I first thought he was just lovesick again. You know how they are when they’re young. He would go on about your beautiful hair, the way you held yourself. He was careful, of course, none of us knew he was talking about you, specifically, the leader of the heretics. But it wasn’t just infatuation. No, figured that out eventually. He was a true believer. Tried to share his views with the rest of us. We didn’t listen, of course. I still think he was wrong. You haven’t exactly convinced me otherwise. But… but he believed.”

“And the Inquisition found out, and they cleared your house, and they executed some of your people? I am familiar with the tale. I do not control the Inquisition, knight, and while your misfortunes -are- unfortunate they are not from my hand.”

“Oh. I know. Not where I was going with that. I mean, you’re right, but I don’t blame you for what happened to my house. The Inquisition happened, and maybe one day there will be a reckoning for that, but that’s not your problem. No, I… I guess, what I really wanted to know, is… my cousin. Your people. You take care of them, right?”

Ysayle frowned. This adventurer was an odd sort. Certainly, she was not used to one who talked so much before getting around to introducing the pointy end to whatever problem they thought needed it.

“So you are not here to join my forces, and you are not here to eliminate them. You… just want to know… that your cousin is all right?”

“No. I mean, yes, but I don’t expect you to know that, and I know what it’s like out here, I’m not naive. I want to know… that you’re taking care of them. All of them. You lead, that’s obvious. I get that. But… do you really truly believe you’re going to end this war? And for what? For the dragons? For yourself?”

The adventurer was obviously leading the conversation to an obvious point, and Ysayle so no reason not to let them. It helped that it would be true.

“For all of us. For every Ishgardian.  And for the dragons, as well. That every drop of blood spent will be the last.”

Ysayle stood tall. Resplendent. Snow crystals floated down gently through the camp. The knight sat, continuing to fidget, slowly. Ysayle was a pillar in the storm. She always was.

She always would be.

The knight nodded to herself before slowly standing to her full height. As much a pillar as Ysayle, tall, imposing. The two faced each other in the silence of the cold winter night.

“The delay in the crystals getting here, I think that buys three, four days. Fighting you here would drain the crystals you already have. I figure that buys another two, three days. That’s a week for Lord Drillemont to fully evacuate Snowcloak. One week.”

The knight twirled her sword in her hand.

“So. We wanna do this?”

~~~

Zoissette returned to the base camp, her hair a mess, her expression tired, and her movements belying a deep exhaustion. She waved away several squires that stepped forward to offer to help, making her way to center of the camp. She dropped her shield unceremoniously into the snow next to the central fire that was burning, and then landed bodily with a thud on the ground next to it. She fought her sword belt for a few moments, and then, growing frustrated, she growled viciously at it and began to bite at the straps holding her gauntlets in place instead.

“Enjoy your climb?” said Y’sthola, barely looking up from her tome.

Zoissette stopped chewing her armor’s straps for long enough to answer. “Invigorating,” she said, before returning her teeth to their task, managing to wrest the strap free of its latch. She waved her hand in the air, trying to shake the gauntlet off rather than try to take it off properly.

Y’shtola sighed, setting her book aside, and got up, coming around the fire to grasp the gauntlet.

“I swear, you are like a child, and one I did not ask to look after.”

“Thanks for the help, mom.”

“Hnh.”

“Help me with the other one?”

“…if you insist.”

Zoissette gave Y’shtola a broad exaggerated smile, and Y’shtola rolled her eyes at Zoissette’s antics.

“You are older than many of us. Must you act like you are half that?”

Zoissette shrugged with the one shoulder. “It’s fun.”

Y’shtola got the other gauntlet off with little effort, and set it down neatly on the ground next to the first one. “Please tell me you at least managed to track down our elusive quarry.”

Zoissette’s playfulness evaporated, and she seemed to fold in on herself a bit. “Yeah. Found the crystals, too. It’ll be a problem again eventually, but for now… we can tell Lord Drillemont that he has his week.”

Y’shtola looked at Zoissette’s face with a frown. “And the Lady Shiva?”

“Handled.”

Y’shtola sat, crouched in the snow next to Zoissette. Zoissette, her hands now free of their gauntlets, set about unlatching her sword belt instead. She decided not to push the matter.

“Well… very well. We should return once you are rested, then, and inform the others.”

Zoissette just nodded. Finally free of her sword belt, she set it and its sword aside, and leaned back slowly into her shield, looking up into the sky. Y’shtola turned her gaze upward as well, and watched as snowflakes fell gently into the camp.

[ignitification]

is it that * account? Their takes are terrible😐 i read before that they said that young toya used his trauma as a psychological weapon against natsuo and i was like WHAT and also shit like dku's bullying wasn't a societal issue actually which uh again,What and this lady nagant bashing? It's almost misogynistic. like I get she wasn't referenced before and treated badly by/for the narrative but she absolutely was nuanced and nagant's takes on society weren't perfect but came from a jaded perspective of being used to brutally keep up the system. Which in the same vein, when was hawks referenced in the story before his intro? what has he really provided to the narrative other than being a cog in the system who upholds the system, pushes for the hero ranking system of having a symbol - and this one being a egoistic abuser - and kills for the system and doesn't have any particular remorse for it and believes the perpetrators of the system over its victims?

Hi, anon! To confirm your suspicions, yes. I do find some of their takes problematic and uncomfortable to read but I also used to like some of their stuff and sometimes I did agree with different statement they made. However, this said, the fact that a lot of people have been reducing the character of Lady Nagant to an appearance of nothing, with no personality and just a rebooted female version of Hawks, does not sit right with me. I honestly don’t remember anything about what they said about Touya/Natsuo (I don’t follow, and I just happen to see some posts when they get rbed in the feed or in the tags) nor about Izuku’s bullying so I’d have to take your word for it (I’m sorry, I really do not care enough to go look for any of these takes, I don’t think it’s worth my time). But as for the Lady Nagant thing, yeah I thoroughly agree with you. I think that the entire existence of her character is to give another dimension to the narrative (which other character couldn’t, so the argument of her being shallow really does not stand on its feet) and to have a positive (or negative, for that matter) impact on Izuku’s development as someone who tries to change the tide of things. I have talked in length about how I think Izuku will become the Greatest Hero exactly because of all he has been through and because he did not stop at the surface of the things (however faulty this statement might be, because while I do think Izuku is still far away from the character I’d like him to be, he still is trying to understand, giving a chance to himself to ask whether there is someone more to what his eyes can see, and that’s far more than any of other heroes have ever done). Lady Nagant therefore serves as both a confirmation and another perspective in the story that Izuku is trying to address/correct/understand - which has literally so little to do with Hawks, that I think the comparison is futile. She is a supernova, and she has been shining for a very short time - but brightly enough to actually pull at some strings for Mido. Which is, again, more than every other hero has ever done. No one actually stopped to tell him their story, and the fact that Izuku values heroes so much is only one of the factors why Lady Nagant’s story will have a huge influence on him and will resonate with Izuku. I really like her character, because she is blunt and honest, and to be honest she has (exactly as the other villains) more values than everyone else in the narrative. She has done bad things - and she has been punished for it. She recognised the need that maybe talking to the kid, instead of shooting him dead (like people are trying to assume, putting forward the argument of her career at the HPSC) or trying to weasel or lure him in, would probably be more effective. Also yeah, her view on society might not be perfect and her methods did not work, and she used to kill terrorists-to-be and all that yada yada, but she also wanted desperately out. She was smart enough to know that killing the President of the HPSC meant that her life was over and that anyways that would have not changed anything in terms of cogs of society, but she did something. She did not stand for the status quo anymore, and that’s where the beauty of her character comes in. Like Hawks, she was held in a cage where she could not refuse to be fed and she just went along with it, until she couldn’t and then she entirely decided to throw herself and everything she had worked for hard at the wind, to end up in Tartarus - but free of the Damocle sword that the HPSC and society norms held above her head. This is entirely opposite of how we are introduced to Hawks’ character, Just because he has been longer in the narrative, as you said, it does not hold true that his introduction was not out of nowhere. I was so confused when we hear Tokoyami having his internship with him and it is only then we discover who he is. Is it nowhere better than Lady Nagant, who is instead at least seen once before (chapter 296/297) with the Tartarus escape. I already however talked about all the faults that Hawks has, and the values he upholds (and the abuse he justifies) so I won’t be repeating myself, but that’s the downline of it. He had no active role in the down bringing of the HPSC (for reason I stated here, confuting once again of the posts of this same account, funnily enough), and he is still supportive of Endeavour, notwithstanding his own past and the detailed account of Dabi’s story (on here I also wrote so much lately, just scroll to see), which is still a memento that Hawks is part of the system, and he does not see himself capable of living without that same system (the system being society - and the comfort that the familiarity of Endeavour brings him). It is really pointless to compare the two character, who stand diametrically opposite on one another in the narrative. I also dislike the choice of Horikoshi that lets Hawks have his moments of saving Lady N’s fall, because it once again, shows how Hawks’ double standard heavily influence his own standard of life (which is worth for his identity of hero and spy, his relationship with Endeavour and Dabi, and him killing Twice and looking down on the League, while still talking affectionately about Lady N), and that is exactly why Hawks’ character fails to acknowledge his fault as his own. Since he is part of the system, his actions are part of the system too, no matter whether wrong or right. If the show (system) must go on, then he will make sure it will. 

[nextbigaiello]

A few months ago I responded to an anonymous message in regards to the punching of Rick Moranis. I had posted a thread responding to the person in a back and forth. I cannot find the posts (maybe if I look on my computer instead of using tumblr on my phone) and they seem lost or deeply hidden on my page. If you can find it, please use it as a means of not making the same mistakes I did. I am not proud of my actions. I’m well aware this was back in October, so it all seems pointless due to the lateness. But I do want to address it and apologize for some of the things I’ve said and my overall immaturity. And even if no one cares or thought of it as a big deal, I believe that the things I said and my attitude weren’t okay and I would like this to be a teachable moment even if it may seem minuscule or “not that big a deal”.

The anonymous messenger had said something along the lines of (and I’m paraphrasing because I don’t remember word for word) he deserved to get punched and the guy who did it was a hero. Though my overall response was to say that I found the act really strange and that anyone who goes around punching people (whether they carry a famous title or not) should face the consequences. Obviously nothing intense only one that fits the crime. But I did not say it like that. If anything the best decision would be not to respond at all and just delete it. But I obviously did not do that. I decided I wanted to gain some sort of high ground over this person and respond in a snarky, ridiculing way. So I mocked the use of being anonymous and kind of reveled in the idea that they were eager to send ME this, as I’m like a nobody. In anonymous’ message, they had said that all white people deserve to get punched in the face. I said that they can punch me in the face any time, but my biggest mistake was writing “I don’t know why it’s a race thing but ok” in the hashtags.

I AM THE BIGGEST IDIOT FOR DOING THIS! I WAS THE ONE WHO TURNED IT INTO A RACE DEBATE JUST BY SAYING THAT! I WHOLEHEARTEDLY BELIEVE AND UNDERSTAND THAT SAYING THAT WAS WRONG EVEN IN THE MOMENT. I DID NOT DELETE IT OR EDIT IT OUT BECAUSE I FIGURED IT WOULD ONLY MAKE IT LOOK WORSE. IT WAS NOT MY INTENTION IN THE SLIGHTEST TO COMMENT THAT. I SAW SOMEONE PUNCH ANOTHER PERSON ON CAMERA AND I WAS ANGRY. BUT I STILL WROTE IT AND POSTED IT THINKING THAT I WAS THE ONE EXPOSING SOMEONE. WHICH IS IDIOTIC, POOR, AND INCREDIBLY DISGUSTING. I LIKE TO THINK I AM AN ALLY WHO CONSTANTLY LEARNS NEW THINGS AND STRIVES TO BETTER THEMSELVES. AND WHILE I STILL THINK I AM AND DO APPRECIATE AND SEEK BEING CORRECTED, I MISCALCULATED AND SHOWED THAT I AM STILL SUSCEPTIBLE TO MAKING MISTAKES. THIS IS WHERE I FEEL THE MOST REGRET IN THOSE SERIES OF POSTS. I AM VERY SORRY TO THOSE WHO ARE AFFECTED AND HURT BY THAT PHRASE AND SIMILAR LANGUAGE THAT HARMS BIPOC COMMUNITIES AND THEIR STRUGGLES FOR HAVING THEIR VOICES BE HEARD. I AM SORRY THAT I DIDN’T APOLOGIZE SOONER. I HOPE FOR FORGIVENESS BUT ITS NOT NECESSARY IF YOU DO NOT SEE MY APOLOGY AS VALID. THAT’S TOTALLY FINE. I JUST HOPE THAT I CAN MAKE UP FOR THIS BY IMPROVING AND LEARNING EVEN MORE.

Unfortunately I continued to respond to this person. I kept posting the back and forth squabbling. They had caught my mistake and rightfully used it against me. The majority of the messages were framed as me basically being a performative activist and not actually liking black people. Which are not true. I can definitely do more as a white ally to help protect and support black (and other people of color’s) lives. However I do as much as I can, and encourage people to do the same. I was desperately trying to convince this person that I wasn’t racist and that I care about everyone. I had attached pictures I drew of myself (one being my pfp) in support of the BLM movement (amongst other things). All of my decisions sounded and looked better in my head. If anything, I don’t think I was really trying to convince anonymous. But actually I believe I was trying to convince anyone who follows me or could stumble onto the posts. I wouldn’t have to have convinced anyone if I just didn’t respond. But I was arrogant. Once anonymous had the mistake against me, my snarky attitude lessened and I wanted to come of as genuine. Mostly because I was. I wanted to see if I could try and get both of us to lower our torches and come to an understanding. My responses got longer. I still came off as a dick in places but tried to counteract that with questioning why they thought messaging me that was smart. We mostly talked about race and all I could say was that I care deeply about black people and I didn’t mean to say what I said. I genuinely said that if they wanted to punch me in the face, I give them the right to. In hindsight I should’ve known that this would come off as disingenuous and played for laughs at their expense. But I did mean it. I said it thinking that maybe it would make them feel better. Maybe they were right that all white people deserve to get punched in the face and I only furthered that idea. With all this time to think, I’m starting to agree.

We ended with neither side breaking. There was no use trying to convince the other side so no more messages were sent. Yet I acted as if I “won” and posted one final post kind of bragging and saying that it’s smart to respond to trolls in a classy and smart manner. Which I didn’t do. So that’s more points towards me being an unnecessary dick.

The second biggest thing I regret is not letting it go and constantly replying. It makes things worse. You’re feeding into it. Especially since I tried to be smug and pretentious. I should’ve never responded in the first place. I should’ve buckled down on having a passive tone and genuine behavior with the replies. But I didn’t. Don’t do what I did. Don’t give antagonistic people or trolls the time of day. Don’t address things you are not capable of talking about.

I believe we must all take accountability for our actions regardless of how big or small they may be. Especially as a white person. I am taking responsibility for this mistake and hope for forgiveness but seek education. Again, it’s all very late, but I didn’t take into account how it would be perceived. I’ve not gotten any messages from anyone about this and no one really interacted with the thread, so I don’t know how people felt about the whole situation nor am I being coerced to do this by someone else. But if I’m ever in a similar situation, please call me out! A few years ago I made a post that I didn’t even agree with at the time but I posted it anyway, and someone called me out saying that it could be perceived as bad taste. I immediately apologized and deleted the post entirely shortly after. I am grateful to them for asking about it and letting me know it wasn’t a good thing to post. I will gladly take responsibility and go about removing or editing something that is problematic or bad in general that I overlooked. I just feel terrible about doing it in the first place and acting as if there’s no possible way it could affect someone. Because it can. It can and I would feel horrible if it did.

Again I do not know where the original posts are. So I don’t have exact quotes and am just going off of memory. But if someone finds them and goes over them and asks me to address this again with the actual evidence and quotes, I’d be more than glad to do that. And if with the actual posts your views and opinions change, that’s totally fair and I’m just happy you took the time to read all this and the posts of you can find them.

All I can say is I’m sorry. I am so very sorry.

-DA

[lukeyhughes]

so the other day i reblogged a post and vagued about my issues with gk’s framing of iraqi tragedies in the tags, which was then replied to and that reply was circulated. while the reply was awesome/insightful/interesting i feel like my original point sorta got lost in the shuffle. i wasnt going to make a post about this for a bit but i feel like its been consuming my thoughts all day so i’ll elaborate what i meant under the cut! 

gen kill is david simon show, so like all david simon shows the thesis is “people exist in inside of a broken system.” in this case, the broken system is the marine corps chain of command and the people are the marines who have to carry out senseless orders. this is shown in many ways, including pointless dangerous missions (see: the bridge, danger close, etc.), how capable enlisted men are vs. most officers, how the “only good officer” nate is punished for rational choices, and how the marines have their spirits crushed because they are forced to senselessly kill iraqi civilians.

when i was in first year of undergrad i took an african studies class that in one seminar problematicized coverage of the Rwandan Genocide: how many times have you heard/read a Romeo Dallaire interview/account? how many times have you read/heard an interview from a genocide survivor? how many times have you seen pictures of bodies/skulls of genocide victims? the answer for the average person is a lot, hardly ever, a lot. with the iraq invasion, the questions would be: how many times have you heard the accounts of coalition soldiers about the iraq war across media types? how many times have you heard accounts of it from the iraqi civilian perspective? how many times have you seen statistics regarding the amount of iraqi civilian casualties? a lot, hardly ever, a lot.

that is all to say that in western media/society we are very comfortable listening to white narratives and just seeing brown bodies, which translates into only hearing white narratives of the tragedies of the deaths of others in foreign countries. in generation kill, iraqi civilian casualties/fatalities/tragedies are framed so that we feel sympathy for the marines that caused them as opposed to those suffering. that is not to say that we as the audience do not feel sympathy (i certainly do!) but it is because of our own internal empathy, not the narrative framing of the show.

let’s take a look at three of the biggest cases of iraqi civilian tragedy and how they’re framed in the show:

first, when rudy goes up to the roadblock and sees the dead little girl in episode 4. we get quite a few shots of the father’s shell-shocked face, but just as many are shots of rudy’s horror/sadness; we watch him walk away from behind from rudy’s perspective and we see that rudy is unable to look away from them. rudy didn’t actually have anything to do with it (aside from abetting i suppose), but even when he gets back to camp the show makes sure to illustrate how affected by it he is, ignoring brad and ray who call out to him. this one is actually surprisingly gk’s best example of eliciting sympathy for iraqi casualties; however, the focus of the scene is still on rudy and the father’s reaction is still mostly used to contribute to rudy’s guilt/horror.

the next scene is the little shepherd boys who were shot by trombley while out with their camels. we see the mom crying over her son, but its basically background noise and is if anything used to further the marines’ (particularly brad and doc bryan to a lesser extent) guilt at causing the situation. we know this because her actions don’t exist independently: they are used for the marines to react to. we also get considerably more shots of marines looking on in horror than her crying about her son. brad’s guilt/sadness about the subject is dwelled on for about twenty minutes over the next two episodes, longer than any of the actual victims’ screen-time dedicated to their feelings combined.

the worst scene is the man in the white car, which sets off the main drama for the next episode. we get why walt did it- the show goes out of its way to make sure that we do- but at the end of the day a man is still dead, likely for no reason. in the aftermath we get about a hundred heartbreaking shots of walt’s shocked face, with a few of brad thrown in as well. on the other hand, we get no shots of the people in the car being horrified at seeing someone they know lobotomized. we just see them run away, no sadness no horror no nothing: from the show’s narrative perspective, this man’s death has no impact on anybody except for walt and the other marines. to make matters worse the man’s face is only shown when the marines notice how horrifyingly disfigured his body is; to me this is robbing the real man of his dignity even in death. 

let’s take a step back and look at gen kill’s general portrayal of iraqis. we don’t really get to see the marines interact with civilians until they reach baghdad when they go into rundown neighbourhoods. here, the iraqi men are portrayed as greedy and dumb, cutting in front of children and not understanding that there are other types of government. that’s not to say that that didn’t happen in real life- i’m sure it did- but it’s essentially the ONLY view of iraq civilians we get: ignorant, greedy, backwards, etc. deadass the only sympathetic iraqi characters in episode 7 are children, where we get a couple of UNICEF-esque shots of doc bryan holding crying kids to drive home that guilt factor. i bring this up because it means that the iraqi characters are not written so that you feel bad for them or empathize with their terrible situation. instead, the narrative wants you to empathize with the marines (in this case, particularly nate) who feel guilty for causing this chaos that they can’t do anything to fix it. 

the only other time iraqi civilians even have lines is when a refugee women tells brad about how he is destroying her home, but even then the point of that isn’t really her pain but how brad feels guilty/ashamed about what the usmc (an institution that is part of identity more than anyone else) is doing that; also she’s attacking brad who really had nothing to do with the baghdad situation and already feels guilty about other things, so its just creating more material for brad’s identity/guilt crisis and our sympathies for it.

all of this to say is that in basically every single case civilian tragedies don’t exist in the narrative on their own: they are used for the marine main characters to react to: the village. the truck crew. the men at the roadside. even the syrian student.

also @sunnygreys replied to some tags i made alluding to this issue. you should read what they wrote bc it’s a really interesting counterweight to what i’m saying and offers a different perspective. but anyway basically they mention certain lines where people are like “no ones forcing us to be here.” particularly notable was when godfather says that no one is forced to be here because they’re all volunteers in episode 3. my view of this has always been that saying that is ignorance on his part and another symptom of the broken command system. godfather chose to be career military,  he chose to accept the mission, he chose to change the ROE, etc: there was no gun to his head. for the enlisted men, the ones on the bottom who actually carried out the mission that injured the boys, they are pretty much being forced to be there by their circumstances. out of all the marines we interact with in the series, im pretty sure brad is the only enlisted man who comes from wealth and by extension had other options, while most others either implicitly or explicitly grew up in impoverished/unstable households: poverty is the new draft. thats sorta between the lines, but i imagine david simon knows that because of his previous work on poverty. what isnt between the lines is that the command system DOES force men in lower ranks to “be there” and carry out order: they can get NJPed for disobeying, they sign contracts that they’ll be dishonourably discharged and lose their benefits if they break, etc. there’s no gun to their head physically but metaphorically its pretty close. to me at least, those lines are not narratively placed to make us sympathize less with the marine main characters but instead to make us sympathize with them even more, because it shows how disconnected command really is. david simon is a huge dick irl but he’s a really clever writer.

again, i reiterate that we as the audience likely feel sympathy for the iraqi population because for most people its naturally sad when people die/get injured/etc. i think a lot of points i made and ones made by @sunnygreys can be mutually true, but the main difference being that i really don’t believe that gk’s intention was to make us step back and reflect on our sympathy with the “oppressors:” i really do think that’s who the show intends for us to sympathize with most based on their choices in camera shots, who says what, etc. that doesn’t mean we can’t step back and reflect, as i hope many of us have, i just think that was an unintended consequence. (if i’m misconstruing what you said please lmk and ill edit!)

that being said, can’t think of a way that generation kill could have done better in this regard based on the book/characters it had. the marines ARE the main characters and by conventional standards its their narrative/feelings/growth that matters. but just because there may have been no other way doesn’t make it unproblematic. its another example of western media using violence against nameless, distant foreigners for their own horror. 

there are people wandering this earth who are dealing with the loss of the man in the white car, the little girl at the roadblock, an entire village. those little boys, if they’re still alive, probably have to deal with the severe injuries they got when they were shot by marines. those slums of baghdad may still be in unstable today and have likely lost community members due to sanitation/hunger/violence. imagine knowing that there is a show out there where you or your loved ones are being used as a plot device to make viewers feel sympathy for the ones who put you in those positions. i sympathize deeply with the marines of GK, but i can imagine how hard it would be to be in the iraqi population’s place watching yourself and your experiences interpreted in a way dissociated from your own suffering so that the primary victimhood can be placed on the ones who did it to you. 

in conclusion, i love gen kill a lot. i love the story and the characters, and i think its an effective story in terms of achieving what it seeks to achieve. i think it’s okay to love something and be critical of it. also if western media companies weren’t cowards and weren’t scared of losing american military financial contributions they would make a miniseries about the iraqi people who were terrorized by american invaders, including the ones we love in gk!

[monkey-network]

The Fiasco Finale of Future [1/2]

So in the penultimate episode of Steven Universe 2, the climax of both the season and series as a whole... is a group hug. As I expected, plenty were not too pleased with this turnout. Some felt it was anti-climatic, some felt it was resonating, and others tried to own the critics by digging deep into the scene like they always do sucking this show’s co- Coming from nearly a month later, I’m... split. One hand, I didn’t mind the climax. On the other hand, it was pathetic compared to plenty of other finales I’ve seen in media. It’s like this show as a whole, I enjoy it, but I also enjoy smacking it upside the head cuz it made some Karen-esque, All Lives Matter type stupid shit that I just cannot get behind. So you know what, Perry the Platypus, let’s mix it up. I wanna express the good and bad of this climactic end to the show and see where we can go from there. You ready?

What’s Good:

You truly wanna know what makes that final hug a great scene? A real showstopper? I have the truth, the best truth behind this, you won’t believe me but here goes. The climax worked because A Hug Is Nice. That’s it, there’s nothing else to it beyond a hug being nice. “But Monkey, you incel troll, there’s should’ve been more to that. The episode shouldn’t have taken that long to get to that point.” Well, in typical fashion, let me put it this way by talking about Spider-Man 2 (better than Spiderverse, don’t @ me). The whole movie is centered around Peter’s life getting shat on. He’s getting fired left and right, his people are abandoning him, he even loses his powers, he’s just at his utter lowest. But at his apartment, while contemplating, in comes his landlord’s daughter, Ursula, who offers him some chocolate cake and a glass of milk.

We can say the scene comes out of nowhere and that this is all that happens, feeling pointless, but I say this is an important scene because after everything that happens to him before, this one gesture from somebody out of nowhere to be honest was one of the nicest things he’s received in a while. It’s the seedling of a scene that keeps Parker going before Doc Ock comes to make him truly spring back into action. Above everything, it was nice. Like a hug.

I don’t need to be philosophically deep with SU2′s meta to tell you that a hug can be a worthwhile thing to get more than anything. It doesn’t resolve all the baggage Steven has in his mind, but a group hug from the people closest to you (and the Diamonds) can be a gesture so nice, it can numb you out, if only for a moment. Only other times where Steven got a hug was when he felt everything could be okay. With Lars, Peridot, and Connie after her “rejection”, and it’s after that “rejection” where he slowly loses it in his attempts to shake off that harsh feeling of abandonment and that everything can be okay. It is something where he can turn to the others for help but the concern of their response makes him reasonably suffer in silence. That last part is a little dumb, but I’ll get to that later. He can’t really hug himself because it doesn’t work like that. The point being that Steven, at his lowest, just needed something nice to consider. And a hug from everyone who loves him (and the Diamonds) can be that piece of chocolate cake he needed to be at ease, again, if only for a moment.

Like let me tell ya, as a deliriously depressed man that constantly wishes for death, a hug shouldn’t be spat on. Whether it be from your friends or mommy, a good hug can, at the very least, keep you sane and going. It isn’t medication, let’s not get it twisted, but a healthy remedy nonetheless, especially if you’ve ever felt touch-starved like I have before. It’s an affectionate gesture that for what it’s worth, should never be taken for granted. And while Steven could’ve well gotten this big type hug at almost any time he desired, I can at least appreciate the show for saving that at the right time. Whew. But, while the moment itself is nice, it’s predictably almost everything around it that unfortunately puts the moment in a vacuum and me with a bad taste in my mouth.

What’s Bad: 

Let’s get this out the way, because I’m such a literal bastard... *inhale*

Penis. Penis. Penis. Penis. Penis. Penis. Penis. Penis. Penis. Penis. Penis.

MUSHROOM! MUSHROOM!

Congrats on those with the corrupted!steven theories who no doubt had it hard on when this horned trunk ascended, hung its head high, and beat its meaty chest with blind rage, the crewniverse certainly had the balls to go with this design and a long discussion of utilizing Monster Steven’s full potential. And if you think I’m nasty about this, hoo boy, be glad that words are all you’re seeing right now because artists no doubt had a field day potentially ruining this design for you even more. I’m surprised Tumblr’s flagging system hasn’t taken down whole posts with this. HEHEHEHAAAAAAAA!

As you can probably tell, I’m not a fan of this Diamond Dinodildo’s design (say that 5x times fast). I mean Rebecca could be as horny as she pleased with this show, but this is next level, I tell you. But seriously, it honestly sucked that this is what they came up with when it served no purpose to Steven thematically other than him being a literal peen of a monster. Said this before, but what does becoming a corrupted looking amalgamation mean to him beyond “he’s a monster”? Corrupted gems weren’t the worst things in his world, they were products of a even worse thing. Turning into a diamond like figure would’ve said something about the cycle of abuse making you not feel like yourself, but a reflection of who you not only resent more than anyone, but were the indirect causes of your newfound issues. That would’ve took his struggle in the Diamonds Days arc to its next logical extreme, and brought most of Future’s episodes centered around Steven’s issues to a sensible turning point. Being a warped Diamond version of himself would’ve meant finally embracing inhumanity, and that would’ve conveyed the peak of Steven harshly feeling less like a human over the course of the season, especially when we had several episodes and new powers centering around him being inhuman. And a previous episode had him try to shatter a Pink version of White Diamond, two beings generally responsible for everything that’s happened to him. And it isn’t the design that made this a turn off.

What was Steven even gonna do as a monster? He does nothing to the town, he never even makes it pass the cliffside. He doesn’t even try to attack anybody, the only times he does is when he’s provoked by either the Cluster, the Diamonds, or any of the gems. Spinel raised more hell than Steven. So on the look back it’s insultingly sad they hyped up this big dick energy only to do... genuinely nothing. He already didn’t deserve turning into Pinky the Phallisaurus, but having him not even do anything as a monster left far more to be desired. Mob Psycho 100 did this nearly identical, but better. You can’t deny that it would’ve worked better with 22 minutes, actually give him something to do beyond screech and stomp like he’s Scrat from Ice Age. As much as I don’t like Change Your Mind, 45 minutes worked to its favor to do everything it did. Oh wait, this episode did make good use of time... with a fucking pity party.

They wasted my baby

This is. The WORST scene in the entire series and I’ll stand by that 100%. It’s one thing to show something offensive, but it’s another to have something be completely pointless. Yes, Connie talked some sense into them, but we didn’t need to waste time having White Diamond and the others bitch about something everyone who isn’t a toesucking simp should’ve figured out at that point. Not like it mattered, the Diamonds and Spinel never show up after this episode anyways, so good job making them count for something, I guess. This as well as minorly acknowledge the fact that the gems had a lot to do with Steven’s mental trauma because hey, we don’t have to hold these gems too accountable for child neglect. Speaking of which, where was Jasp- This plays well into my previous point, we aren’t shown what Steven was gonna do as a monster, so what else is the episode to do beyond holding him back in time to just make the characters go “All is lost” for one second before getting back up like this is Marvel’s Captain Driftwood?

Friendship is Magic had this type of moment in its penultimate finale but in that, more time was given to show the villains getting the upper hand, Twilight at her low point, her turnaround with her friends, and the lead in charge to defeat the villains. While some moments felt convenient and downright insulting, they made the most of their limit. The same can’t be said for this and it makes no sense. Speaking of things that make no sense:

Was this shapeshifting or corruption? Rushing or dragging? This personally bothers me because people are saying he shapeshifted even when they were also on board with him corrupting. But what was the point where monster Steven cums cries into the ocean turning it pink?

Now if Steven got himself corrupted, this would make sense since the three Diamonds are there with so fully turning him back to normal wouldn’t be an issue. Questions would arise about how corruption can happen to a human, then again this is Steven Universe, fans never really wanted you to ask questions. But if this was shapeshifting, then why have this permanent monster form? It would’ve made a little more sense of Steven changing his shape depending on his emotions, like what we’ve seen before. Additionally, Steven should have been capable of talking normally instead of roaring and growling like he switched brains with an actual animal. Just because he kinned Godzilla’s joystick doesn’t mean he was unable to speak to anybody, that is if he shapeshifted. Lastly, and this is more implicit than my previous points:

This season shouldn’t have tried tacking mental issues and trauma onto this dickslap of a climax. I’m on the side where we should’ve seen more from monster Steven, but what does this tell me for the topic of mental health? Nearly killing people on three separate occasions didn’t help, but having him transform into a near mindless beast is a backhanded way to convey post traumatic stress. Let me put it this way, if we didn’t get that episode where we learn Steven had held up trauma and stress from Doctor Priyanka, everything surrounding it afterward wouldn’t feel as fucked up as it did. Yes, understanding a root of a character’s problems is good, beneficial even, but having your character nearly, sporadically, commit MURDER THREE TIMES only to then have him become a wildin’ creature does nothing, if not disgust. It's disgusting when you talk about PTS one minute and have your main character be socially dangerous the next. You’d feel sorry for him, sure, but I gotta say nearly killing people is not something we should just hand wave. That is not a good or realistic depiction of depression and post traumatic stress; especially when you trying to discuss this with children. And don’t try to justify it by saying it was necessary for his downward spiral. Having to think and see death before my own eyes in real life, there should’ve been a better way to make Steven hit rock bottom without putting other’s lives on the line. It wasn’t compelling or resonating to see him become a witless creature after saying he could get away with anything, it felt jarringly hallow and teeth gritting sadistic to think this was acceptable. It took him turning into a literal creature to finally go to therapy or a throwaway line about therapy in this show’s case? Are you kidding me?

The hug is a nice moment on its own, but it took far too many kneecaps to get to this point and think it’s believably or justly earned. I can make fun of the monster design all I want, but what they put Steven through to get to this point is the most insulting writing I ever have to think about. Because you know what that hug told me, personally? It’s that you can commit near irrefutable atrocities, you can behave like a blithering rampaging beast all you wish, but that won’t matter. Because you’re valid and your people will love you. That is not only asinine, but it kinda pissed on what I went through growing up. Like, as idealistic as that felt, it didn’t add up because it made the mentally unstable come off as more unstable than they mostly are. You can disagree all you want with this, it won’t change the baffling fact that I came to this conclusion in the first place when I didn’t want to. “But the crew said in an interv-” NO, just nope. If the message the show gives is this polarizing for those that invested or were concerned with it, maybe the message wasn’t clear enough, who knows? I can believe Mr. Rogers never fucked this up when he made his show. I tried thinking of this differently, but I can’t excuse what they did and how they did it. Bojack Horseman never pulled this with its main lead and when it truly did, that was given more time to sort out; not an 11 minute epilogue in its final moments. The hug was nice, but this episode was trash.

Speaking of which, next time...

We Finally Look to the Future

Here’s Part 2, if you’re up.

[douchebagbrainwaves]

STARTUPS AND IMAGES

Apple serious venture funding, on the condition that Woz quit, he initially refused, arguing that he'd designed both the Apple I and the Apple II while working at HP, and there is nothing to see outside. Now all educated people seem to share a certain prickly independence, whenever and wherever they lived. And the Internet makes copies easy to distribute. The other side may even break the deal; if they do that, they'll usually seize on some technicality or claim you misled them, rather than admitting they changed their minds.1 Investors would be the best supplier, but falls just short of the threshold for solvency—which will of course have been set on the high side, since there is no limit to the number of startups started within them. Believe it or not, the two senses of the word. In both painting and hacking there are some kinds of knowledge that get in the way of seeing a work of art that would appeal equally to your friends, to people in Nepal, and to have the same velcro-like shape as genuinely interesting ideas, but for your readers. You might come up with that kind of works. Six weeks is fast. Angels you can sometimes tell about other angels, because VCs are afraid of looking bad to their partners, and perhaps others that would appeal to most humans, and you don't take investment, then competitors who do will have an advantage. To them the company is worth more.2 There are two problems with this, though.

He didn't work for General Widget, but for those who make it often try to trick us. Lack of empathy is associated with intelligence, to the point where they can put a lot of trolls in it. It doesn't even have y.3 This probably makes them less productive, because they might end up with nothing. But I disagree with Caterina Fake when she says that makes this a bad time to start a startup: get a version 1 out fast, then improve it based on users' reactions. But there is a Laffer curve for government power, just as professional theater was being born, and pushed the medium so far that every playwright since has had to live in his shadow. Don't be Evil?

Especially if other parents are doing it. Instead of making one $2 million investment, make five $400k investments.4 If you turned it over, it said Inside Macintosh. Hewlett-Packard, wouldn't let him do it at a low enough valuation. It's probably a combination of factors. Most humans will also find images of 3D objects engaging, because that was where the deals were. It was a new one, and instead of physical knobs it had buttons and an LED display. So startup hubs like Silicon Valley benefit from something like the marketplace effect, but shifted in time: startups are there because startups were there. I thought I was ready to question everything I knew. A lot of the spread of the Industrial Revolution that wealth creation definitively replaced corruption as the best way to get rich, he'll hire you as a bargain if you don't need them. I'm optimistic we will. The median visitor will arrive with their finger poised on the Back button.

But in general, for application software, you want to invest in successful startups, and think it's therefore the mark of a successful startup to have this happen. Yes, he may have extensive business experience.5 But if you work for a startup is like a pass/fail course for the founders, what you want to be the top one in your mind. Children of kings and great magnates were the first to grow up out of touch with the world. Actually big companies are not the root cause of variation in every other human skill. Your Hopes Up. They get the pick of all the different types of work, instead of what I wanted to do.6 I can tell, the way to do it, then it is hard, at least, that high level languages are often all treated as equivalent. In a feudal society, there are subtle signs you're in a place so nice that rich people wanted to live there. Another is to stand close. The final contributing factor is the culture of a large organization.

This probably accounts for a lot of subsidiary questions to be cleared up after the handshake, and if something great happens, they'll stick with it—something great meaning either that someone wants to buy you. How to Become a Hacker, and in it, but it does at least make you keep an open mind. If so, now's the time. Really? I've seen grinds to a halt when they start to think for themselves. It was more like the high school trick of breaking up with someone before they can break up with you. But if you had no money were taking more risk, and are entitled to higher returns. So you will not, as of this writing, be able to get features done faster than our competitors, and also to do things that would be just as worried about premature design—deciding too early what a program should do. Surely it was their duty to their limited partners simply to invest in those that at least have the advantage, from each one's point of view. This is especially true in a startup is like walking on your hands: it's possible, but it has the side effect that after having implicitly lied to kids about how good their judgement is, we then have to lie again about all the things they wanted with their own hands. There are some things that will appeal to most sentient beings whatever that means the skill and determination of an ordinary person.

Data is by definition easy to copy.7 So you have to do things I knew she was about to do anyway. Investors have different risk profiles from founders. And he could help them because he was one of the more profitable pieces of Yahoo, and the noise starts again. Most humans will also find images of 3D objects engaging, because that was where their peers were, and investors are very sensitive to it.8 But two guys who thought Multics excessively complex went off and wrote their own. Another much less subtle influence is brand. The puffed-up companies that went public during the Bubble didn't do it just because they were too quick. And since the ability and desire to create it vary from person to person, it's not made equally. If you don't yet have any traffic, they fall back on number 2, what other investors think. Most deals, for investment or acquisition, happen in two phases.9

Notes

All he's committed to is following the evidence wherever it leads. You're not seeing fragmentation unless you see what the startup isn't getting market price. This is the only way to see what they're capable of. It tipped from being overshadowed by Microsoft, incidentally, because the early days, and this is: we currently filter at the data, it's because of the reasons startups are often surprised by this, though more polite, was starting an outdoor portal.

Stone, op. The image shows us, the rest of the war it was the last step is to do work you love, or whether contractors count too. Scheme: define foo n lambda i set! Successful founders are effective.

Good investors don't lead startups on; their reputations are too valuable.

This is the converse: that the founders of Google to do it.

They don't make wealth a zero-sum game. The unintended consequence is that if you have to do, so they had to write every component yourself, but it's not lots of people are these days. One way to be some things it's a seller's market. These were the case of Bayes' Rule.

Different sections of the conversion of buildings not previously public, like a knowledge of human nature, might come from all over the super-angels hate to match. At first literature took a shot at destroying Boston's in the definition of property is driven mostly by technological progress is accelerating, so buildings are traditionally seen as temporary; there is a great programmer might invent things an ordinary programmer would never have left PARC. Why Are We Getting a Divorce? Well, almost.

Though they were friendlier to developers than Apple is now. Download programs to run an online service, and partly simple ignorance. The reason for the talk to corp dev is to use an OS that doesn't lose our data.

In part because Steve Jobs doesn't use. The threshold for participating goes down to you; you're too early if it's the right order. Bad math is merely a complicated but pointless collection of specious beliefs about its intrinsic qualities.

It seemed better to overestimate than underestimate the importance of making n constant, it might actually be bad if that means the slowdown that comes from.

[preserving-ferretbrain]

Merciless

by Wardog

Wednesday, 16 September 2009

Wardog reviews Havemercy by Jaida Jones and Danielle Bennett~

And here I am with the ex-Harry Potter fanfic writers yet again. Havemercy is a fantasy novel, written by Jaida Jones and Danielle Bennett of Shoebox Project fame. It's basically Temeraire meets The Mirador and, well, it’s not entirely dreadful.

It’s set in the kingdom of Volstov, which is currently embroiled in a century-long war against the neighbouring Ke-Han Empire (who are the usual different-coloured, braid sporting fantasy ‘other’). Volstov’s greatest weapon is the mechanical, magic-infused dragons, which are powered from some kind of magical well and piloted by the Dragon Corp. The war, however, recedes into the background for most of the novel; instead we concentrate on the developing relationships between the four (yes, four) POV protagonists.

First up we have: Margrave Royston, a socialite-wizard, and a big gay, who has been exiled to the country for bumming the crown Prince. He is packed off to stay with his countrified brother and his brother’s horrid wife, and finds himself becoming friends with the quiet and scholarly tutor who has been charged with the education of the children. This is Hal, Protagonist II. Back in the capital, we have Rook, the worst of the Dragon Corp, who has recently involved them in a massive diplomatic scandal on account of treating an Ambassador’s wife like a whore. And finally Thom, an aspiring academic at the university, who is tasked with basically putting the Dragon Corp through sensitivity training as a consequence of Rook’s actions.

The focus is very much on character and relationships rather than, y’know, events. The war does kick it up a notch in the final third of the book and various things come together but it all feels a bit non-urgent to be honest, although the consequences of it are genuinely devastating (more on this later). I remember the first time I ever picked up a book by Sarah Monette and I was so impressed. “Wow,” I said (or words to this effect), “it’s wonderful to come across a fantasy writer capable of creating complex characters, and taking the time to develop them.” Unfortunately, I think it’s time for me to eat those words. I’d like some goddamn plotting please. To be fair, I think part of the problem is not that they’ve chosen to focus on character over action but that they’re basically not as good as Monette. I’m not saying Havemercy isn’t moderately competent and reasonably entertaining, it’s just also emotionally unconvincing and has a weird attitude to homosexuality.

The novel is told from the perspective of all four of its protagonists, which keeps things from dragging too much. There has been some attempt to differentiate their voices, Rook, for example, talks common (although, again, he comes off as a poor man’s Mildmay). And everybody else pretty much blends into sounding vaguely like Felix or, you know, possibly the authors. The effect of the four different points of view is generally positive and enlivening although I do think four was perhaps slightly too ambitious. And as much as it’s illuminating to have multiple perspectives on the same events occasionally it does lead to what feels like a tedious and self-indulgent dissection when you’d much rather be getting on with the … oh … what that’s word again … plot.

There are things to like about Havemercy. Steampunk dragons, for example, powered by the magic of eccentric magicians, you simply can’t go wrong with that. And I loved Havemercy herself:

“Just a spin,” I said. “Good,” said Havemercy. “I’m getting rusty.” “Shit,” I said, “you ain’t.” “Aren’t,” Havemercy said. “You common little fucker.”

She’s a nice antidote to swotty little Temeraire. And actually I quite liked Rook, who is the only character in the whole novel with any bollocks to speak of. And to give Jones and Bennett their due, they do a good job with the world building, weaving the history and the culture into the narrative without making it too oppressive.

However, there are a bunch of problems with Havemercy which reveal both the novel’s status as a debut and, perhaps, the youth of its authors. Spoilers ho.

Havemercy

She ain’t in it anywhere near enough. I know part of the deal with having a cool concept is that you don’t overplay it but, seriously, for a novel called Havemercy I could have done with a touch more dragon. Besides, as we can see above, when she is there she’s fabulous. As the war finally becomes marginally more important than the characters’ personal lives, the first major indication that something bad is in the offing is that the dragons start to act a little strangely and feel a trifle ‘off’ to their pilots. Now, I know the Dragon Corp are supposed to be an insular and closed off unit to which the reader has only mediated access but because the dragons aren’t really given enough page-time it’s next to impossible to engage, emotionally or intellectually, with the fact that they’re starting to go wrong. The dragons are off, are they? Well, uh, what were they like when they on? This also interferes with the climax – mad clockwork dragons charging towards their destruction or their salvation, it’s such a fantastic image but it has no depth to it because the dragons are basically scenery by this point anyway.

Sausage Party

There are no women in Havemercy, unless you count Havemercy herself. Oh, and a bunch of whores and a homophobic wife, of course. It must be the fandom-gene at work, because it’s obvious that Jones and Bennett are way more interested in pretty, angsty boys than they are in, well, anything else. Maybe I shouldn’t penalise them for this (at least they’re honest) but if a male writer wrote a book in which his only female characters were prostitutes, flirts or bigots I would hit the roof. Again, maybe it wouldn’t be such a problem if the fantasy genre didn’t have such an appalling history with female characters. History? What am I saying. Present. Also it genuinely does unbalance the book, what are women doing (apart from whoring and being homophobic) in the kingdom of Volstov? I think it might have helped the authors differentiate their voices and perspectives if one of them had perhaps been female.

Puerile Emotions

The characters are all of them saturated in angst, except, having read Monette, I can safely say it’s a kind of angst-lite, in which the characters moop and weep and put their wrist to their foreheads but ultimately it all feels a bit pointless. Take Hal and Royston. They fall for each other hard. They get caught in a rainstorm. They take shelter in a small hut. They are forced to remove all their clothes. To keep from, like, catching a mild chill or something. They have tension. They nearly kiss… but Royston decides he would be taking advantage of Hal if he did institute snoggage so they don’t. Basically their relationship goes something like this:

Royston: I am blatantly in love with you (sorry I have a silly name, by the way, I know it’s horrendously unattractive but we can work round it)

Hal: I am blatantly in love with you too.

Royston: Shall we shag like bunnies … wait … no! We cannot shag like bunnies because … because … look over there, a plot development.

Hal: But I want to shag like bunnies!

Royston: We cannot. Woe!

Hal: But why?

Royston. Because we cannot. Woe!

Hal: Woe! (I’m still a bit confused on this point)

Royston: Because I will be taking advantage of your innocence, dammit. Woe.

Hal: But I’m blatantly in love with you and I want to shag like bunnies.

Royston: But we cannot. Woe! Come away to the city with me.

Hal: But then I would have to abandon these people who are horrible to me and be happy. Woe!

Royston: You’re right, it’s a terrible and selfish thing to ask of you. Woe.

Hal: Oh, all right.

Royston Woe…err…what? Oh. Okay. Yay. Let us shag like bunnies … oh wait … we cannot shag like bunnies.

Hal: Why not this time?

Royston: Because … because … I only want to do it when you’re absolutely ready. Woe.

Hal: I’m fucking ready, I’ve been ready since page fucking 30.

Royston: Well, tough, I’m going to war. Woe!

Hal: Woe!

Royston: I am back from War.

Hal: Can we…

Royston: Well, now I am really ill and might die of a magical disease. Woe. Gosh, I wish we’d shagged like bunnies.

Hal: Me too.

Rosyton: Woe.

Hal: Woe.

Following a similar pattern, is the relationship between Rook and Thom. Rook hates Thom because … because … he does? And is generally bitter and heartless because his younger brother was tragically killed in a fire when he was but a Rookling. Thom, too, is carrying deep psychological wounds from the fact his older brother was tragically killed in a fire when he was…. Yeah. Zomg. I could cope with this Home and Away style plotting if hadn’t been so appallingly handled. Essentially Thom works it out first from something Rook says in a moment of vulnerability (Havemercy, of course, spotted it straight away because she is fabulous) and then … wait for it … decides not to tell him. Because … because … ?

There is no excuse for this kind of nonsense. Nobody in the novel seems remotely capable of behaving in a sensible, non-histrionic fashion or accepting other characters as adult human beings capable of making their own decisions. You can argue this is all part and parcel of their flaws but it seems more like authorial incompetence than human failing to me. And it makes Havemercy extremely irritating to read at times because I simply couldn’t respect the characters.

Teh Gay

So we’re getting more homosexual and bisexual characters in fantasy these days. I guess that’s a good thing. But with an increase in quantity, as ever, comes a decrease in quality. I think I’ve playfully remarked that it’s impossible for anybody even vaguely connected to the fandom to not have a gay in their books (I’ll forgive Erastes because she’s writing m/m romance), but there’s something horribly tokenistic about this parade of brand new, card carrying poofters. I’d better refine that slightly. It’s not that they are there to be token gays, but there is something about their homosexuality that feels tokenistic.

Take Royston and Hal. I seriously have no idea why these two are together. I mean, I know the principle – Royston is cynical and depressed after the unfortunate crown-prince-bumming-incident and is attracted to Hal’s gentleness and innocence, and Hal is desperate for knowledge of the world and somebody to be interested in him. It’s a typical innocent youth / man of the world pairing but it’s utterly utterly hollow. It’s all fluff, cuddles and celibacy. I’m not saying I want hot man-on-man action every other page, or even at all, but I felt no genuine sense of individual connection between them. It was more sort “hey, you have a cock, I like cocks, maybe we should think about having a relationship.” Also I don’t mean to be vulgar but the constant deferral of sexual gratification struck me as a bizarre way to endorse the merit of their relationship. It was like the authors were elevating one form of homosexuality (the pretty, celibate kind) above another (one that actually involves two men fucking each other).

Take this description of Hal, from Royston’s point of view:

I didn’t know who’d moved first to make it so, but quite suddenly he was tucked in close against my chest, warm and impossibly soft. Everything important about Hal was softness, I decided, his hair and his mouth, the sweet curve of his jaw, and the way it fit neatly into my palm.

What the hell?! Now, I’m no expert on what gay men think about the men they find attractive, but, seriously, soft? Soft?! To describe another man? I’m kind of assuming here that gay men fancy other men for pretty much the same reasons women fancy men … and, let me tell you, when I’m cuddling a man, or a kissing a man, I’m not thinking “gosh, isn’t he lovely and soft.” I’m not demanding chiselled and rippling masculinity here but there’s no way around the fact that ‘soft’ is a terrible word to use in conjunction with a man, especially if you are one. And, again, there’s something so flaccid and de-eroticised about the whole scene. For heaven’s sake ladies. Homosexuality is not an aesthetic.

It’s possible that I’m just too used to romances, heterosexual and homosexual, and therefore emotionally limp, sexually uninspiring and generally badly done romance arcs irritate me more than they should. But it doesn’t help that Hal is as wet as Fort William. He does occasionally make things happen, but mainly by crying at them. Weirdly, I do think I’d have found Hal less offensive if he’d been a woman. Not, I hasten to add, because I believe crying at things is more acceptable if you’re female, but because the “quiet governess / cynical lord” is a romance trope with hundreds of years of associations behind it, hopefully lending it some resonance even if the depiction of it is rather lacking. Pathetic guy and slightly less pathetic guy, not so much.

Furthermore, Havemercy suffers from an equally unsuccessful depiction of homophobia. The prevailing view of homosexuality is not really established – it seems to lie, rather like the present day in the real world, somewhere between widely accepted and generally reviled. Royston is exiled for his shenanigans with the Crown Prince, indicating a certain degree of political discomfort and there’s an amount of social sneering directed at him for his predilections. However, the only people who are openly homophobic are those we are supposed to view as ignorant (Rook) and/or repugnant (Royston’s brother’s wife). This leads to a peculiar implied social structure in which homosexuality is not completely approved but only evil people are homophobic. This is turn elevates homophobia to being basically morally equivalent to murder. Thank you self-consciously liberal, queer-positive fandom. Thank you. Ultimately, there is no denying that homophobia, sexism and racism are bad but there are plenty of perfectly nice, perfectly moral people out there who just happen to be, ‘a little bit racist’. As I think we’ve argued here at Fb on many an occasion, you do not get ‘isms’ by people waking up the morning and deciding to be prejudiced today. Again, I’m not saying the novel should have had more homophobia in it, I just think it should have more bollocks. And, regardless, it’s pretty irresponsible of Royston to “out” poor Hal (who, as we have already established is a basically homo-convenient) in a society that may judge him harshly for his sexuality.

Whedonesque

And I mean that as an insult. Again, massive, honking spoilers incoming. So, at the end of the novel they realise they can probably deal with the magic illness that is affecting Royston and the other magicians, and driving the dragons made, by taking out the magicians who cast the spell. Conveniently these magicians are standing around like NPCs in a big blue tower in the middle of the Ke-Han capital. So the dragon corp get on their now batshit dragons in a desperate attempt to tkill the magicians, save themselves and save the world. All the dragons and nearly all the dragon corp are killed. Except Rook, the one who might be gay, and the non-homophobic one, of course. In some respects, the fact I was genuinely shocked and upset by this says positive things about Jones’ and Bennett’s writing. On the other hand, it’s also a shot so fucking cheap it’s worthy of Mr Whedon himself. Kill Tara why don’t you. Kill Wash. But keep your main characters miraculously isolated from the slightest ill fortune as if the Almighty Plot Angel itself was watching over them.

Conclusion

I guess I’d better stop bitching and wrap this up. For all my criticisms, and let’s face it, there were many, I did kind of enjoy Havemercy, in spite of myself. It has some good ideas, even if they are somewhat buried beneath the layers of adolescent characterisation and gay-fetishisation.Themes:

Books

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Sci-fi / Fantasy

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Minority Warrior

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http://ruderetum.blogspot.com/

at 13:02 on 2009-09-17There seems to be an infestation of dragon riding books right about now, with all of these Eragon's and Temeraire's and what not. Personally, I've never really cared for that idea, especially if the dragons are supposed to be intelligent. In Harry Turtledove's Darkness series and George R. R. Martin's The Ice Dragon(at least in the short story) the dragons are not terribly intelligent or are quite alien (respectively). But in these other books the dragons are supposed to have personalities and to be intelligent.

So we have a large awesome magical beast which is awesome in its own right and then we have some whiny humans who control them. What! I mean, dragons can be good and all but the idea of an intelligent awesome creature being controlled consensually by some puny and usually whiny humans is not acceptable to me. Dragons might give the occasional lift to a human, but they are not horses people!

In other words some jerk using a dragon as a weapon and that dragon just getting along with the idea reduces their awesomeness into mere attributes to make the human characters cooler.

My other point concerns the high amounts af angst which seems to infest the genre as well. It connects to the point about this books' take on homophobia and in general coming out stories and such like. Now, it is clearly meant to make some aesop about how homophobia or such like things are bad, but if we have characters who are only defined by their narcissistic whining and their utterly frustrating behaviour because of this, we have a problem. The problem being that they are uninterestin characters.

I mean if the character being portrayed isn't a teenager(and an angst ridden teenager is a horrible cliche in itself) or clinically depressed then it just doesn't make any sense. It is strange that reading the Maus comic book for example contains very small amounts of angst from the main characters, even when they're put in Auschwitch for god's sake and on the other hand we have fictional "heroes" who can't do anything because things are so frigging bleak. I'm looking at you Mr. Potter.

End rant.

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Arthur B

at 13:51 on 2009-09-17

So we have a large awesome magical beast which is awesome in its own right and then we have some whiny humans who control them. What!

I do find this a bit jarring myself, and it only gets more jarring the more independently intelligent the dragons get. I seem to recall in the

Pern

books it kind of makes sense because the dragons aren't smart enough to just be told "go and destroy those space threads", they need telepathically linked human riders to steer them right. But if you've got dragons who are massive, powerful, and smart enough to follow a mission briefing and understand what they need to go do, one does begin to wonder what the point of having someone riding them is in the first place. Why stick a squishy vulnerable person atop a powerful war machine when the war machine is perfectly capable of doing the job itself? What on earth does the rider bring to the fight which the dragon doesn't bring in spades?

Which isn't to say that

Havemercy

doesn't have an answer to that - Kyra doesn't mention either way - but it is something people should probably think about when they're writing this sort of thing.

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http://ruderetum.blogspot.com/

at 14:26 on 2009-09-17The use of dragons as war machines and comparing them to bombers and fighters should really be examined and justified more completely if it appears that these 'machines' have real intelligence. I believe Michael Swanwicks' The Iron Dragons Daughter is one of the greatest successes when it comes to making this kind of thing work. The dragons are gigantic warmachines whose intelligence is like a magical artificial intelligence filled with hate, because they're war machines. So they need to be controlled by pilots or they would try to destroy everything. So there's actually a reason for the control. It's so sad that some pure badass creature would take orders from some squishy apes without being fordced to.

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Dan H

at 18:47 on 2009-09-17I'm with Arthur on this one. It's not that I find it degrading for dragons to have riders (I find it a little hard to get het up about the dignity of fictional beings, and I don't actually have a problem with the whole "bond between dragon and rider" thing) it's just that in a military context it makes no sense at all. It's like insisting that all of your soldiers go into battle with a small child on their back.

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Rami

at 19:00 on 2009-09-17Wow. Magical steampunk dragons. I really can't see how you could go wrong with that. Maybe you could have them run out of coal mid-flight and have the riders necessary as stokers, or something.

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http://ruderetum.blogspot.com/

at 20:15 on 2009-09-17Well, truth be told, I'm not much of a torch bearer for fictional beings' rights myself. I just get bugged about stuff and too often the cool image of dragons is just a cheap way of giving the central character(s) a cool accessory.

In this case, the dragons being mechanical, I suppose it's not really important. The cover blurp is incorrect though, steampunk magic dragons can be found in The Iron Dragons Daughter, which I mentioned before. It's a great idea though anyways.

Actually Dan, judging from your own writings that book by Swanwicks' could suit you. It's been described as an anti-fantasy and is its authors reaction to run-of-the mill trilogies and such. Plus it's a changeling story, with a magical society run by amoral elves, which is pure cutthroat capitalism and rule of the strong.

An example is that when a citys' and its universitys' costs and population gets too high, they(it's emblematic of the story that who they are is left intentionally unclear) initiate a Tenism, which means that in carnivalistic time of chaos one tenth of the population is handily destroyed. The strong and the rich are supposed to survive. Well, it's at least different I suppose.

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http://miss-morland.livejournal.com/

at 15:55 on 2009-09-18

Everything important about Hal was softness, I decided, his hair and his mouth, the sweet curve of his jaw, and the way it fit neatly into my palm.

Blergh. This is the sort of weirdness you'll find in a lot of slash fanfic, and which contributes to giving the genre as a whole a bad reputation. I'm so glad I've never bothered to read The Shoebox Project...

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Wardog

at 16:26 on 2009-09-18

Blergh

Thank you. I read that description and I felt exactly the same way. But I thought perhaps too much hypermasculinity had warped my sense of romance. I feel vindicated in my blergh now.

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Arthur B

at 18:45 on 2009-09-18The jaw bit seems particularly weird. Jawbones are not, by and large, especially soft, and jaws by extension tend not to be soft unless they have a fair amount of padding. Heck, I'm a fat bastard and I still don't have enough fat in my face that you could really describe my jaw as soft to the touch.

The mental images conjured are bizarre. Either Hal has some sort of horrible bone-melting disease and has to eat through a straw, or he's an extremely chubby guy whose jowly jaws and double chin fit neatly into Royston's hand.

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http://miss-morland.livejournal.com/

at 19:20 on 2009-09-18

he's an extremely chubby guy whose jowly jaws and double chin fit neatly into Royston's hand.

Lol! What a romantic image. :-D

But really -- I don't mean to sound condescending or anything, but I do wonder a little how much these authors actually know about the male physique, because realistically I'd expect there to be some stubble, at least. Not all this 'softness'. But perhaps gay men don't have facial hair? *eyeroll*

In fact, I get the impression they think gay men are completely different from straight men, both mentally and physically, which I find offensive -- it's not so much that I have a problem with male characters crying; it's rather that I have a problem with male

gay

characters crying, because I'm 100 % certain the author wouldn't portray a straight male character that way.

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http://miss-morland.livejournal.com/

at 19:46 on 2009-09-18Oh, and I should add that I haven't read

Havemercy

, I'm just speaking about bad slashfic in general.

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Dan H

at 21:27 on 2009-09-18The "gay man = woman" (or possibly "alien") thing is particularly disquieting, if only for its popularity amongst people who would never in a million years think of themselves as homophobes.

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Arthur B

at 22:45 on 2009-09-18We have people riding dragons, we have weird attitudes towards homosexuality... I don't think there's ever going to be a better time to cough and note that

Anne McCaffrey

has some interesting ideas about tent pegs.

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http://descrime.livejournal.com/

at 03:05 on 2009-09-19My impression of slash fanfiction is that there are two kinds of slash writers: writers whose characters like they like to write about just happen to be guys, and writers whose characters they like to write about happen to be guys because they hate writing women. I once took part in an online discussion where women seriously complained that it wasn't their fault they just wrote women completely out of their stories, it was simply too hard to write female characters. And they saw nothing wrong with this. From this review (I haven't read the book), it seems these authors fall in the latter category.

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Viorica

at 05:16 on 2009-09-19I think it's also a form of emotional porn/Mary Sue syndrome. There's a reason fangirls swoon over angst.

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Dan H

at 20:36 on 2009-09-20It's one of those difficult situations where you *almost* have to stand up and say "well fair play to them then". I mean it seems that what you've got here are a couple of girls who are mostly interested in pretty men angsting about stuff and who write exactly that. You've almost got to admire the honesty.

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Wardog

at 23:12 on 2009-09-20@Dan - Yeah, I know what you mean about the honesty. But ultimately I think I'd be kicking up a fuss if a male writer did it so I feel morally obliged to kick up a fuss if female writers do :)

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Arthur B

at 01:58 on 2009-09-21I think the difficulty is the inclusion of the homophobia angle; by introducing what is essentially a RL issue into their story about pretty unthreatening men having pretty unthreatening relationships, they are kind of inviting people to compare said pretty unthreatening homosexuals to actual flesh and blood homosexuals. And asking the reader to compare your fantasies to reality is not a game that ever ends well.

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http://roisindubh211.livejournal.com/

at 02:07 on 2009-09-28I actually find it odd that they did such a silly job with the romance in this, because they wrote much more believable boys in the Shoebox project:

Sirius makes a noise that's kind of a laugh and kind of a groan and then presses his lips against Remus' without any warning. Or with ample warning that Remus is only just now beginning to decode. He hasn't shaved and his hands are sweaty and there are teeth in there, and it is not much at all like kissing Lily except that kisses, Remus has learned, are wet, nervous, compelling, terrifying things. He makes a sound. Sirius jerks away. "Let's never mention this again," Sirius decides out loud, leaping to his feet, as if he's been electrocuted. "Shall we?" "Uh," Remus says.

I'm wondering now how much of the quality in the Project has to do with the pre-existing characters.

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Dan H

at 10:36 on 2009-09-28I'd imagine pre-existing characters are a big part of it. It takes pretty much no effort at all to make a relationship between two characters convincing if everybody is *already* convinced those two characters are at it doggy-style.

There's very little, for example, in the passage you quote that tells us why these two people are attracted to each other beyond the fact that they're Remus Lupin and Sirius Black.

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Arthur B

at 16:39 on 2009-09-28This would, in fact, seem to one of the dangers inherent in using fanfiction to develop your writing talents: because someone else has done all the heavy lifting of establishing the characters for you, there's far less need to actually develop your skills on that front.

It's slightly less true of setting, because you get weird alternate universe fanfics which play merry hell with the setting - or indeed ditch it entirely and populate an entirely new world with the same characters - but the fanfic scene does seem to be all about the familiar characters. Even when the occasional original character creeps in, it's considered bad form (and indeed textbook Mary Sueism) to let them upstage the established characters, and you don't see many people writing alternate universe fanfic where the setting is the same but all the characters are different.

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Dan H

at 18:48 on 2009-09-28To be fair to fandom, there's a sense in which working with pre-existing characters can actually help sharpen your mad characterization skillz. You can talk about "voice" all you like, but in the end one of the best ways to really understand how the whole thing works is to look at something and say "yes, but would Severus Snape really *say* that?"

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Arthur B

at 19:17 on 2009-09-28It can help there, sure, but that sort of exercise does nothing to help you establish "Who is this Snape person?" in the first place, which is the aspect I think people can neglect. As you point out, you can get away with not explaining who Snape is in fanfic, you can't get away with not explaining who Royston is if you're introducing him to people for the very first time.

Essentially, it can help you understand voice, and how to write in particular voices, but those skills are at best ancillary to the skill of coming up with distinctive voices for your characters in the first place. Hence Cassie Cla(i)re and the mysteriously Malfoylike qualities of certain of her characters.

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http://roisindubh211.livejournal.com/

at 01:53 on 2009-09-29They do make them believably attracted to each other throughout the Project, I just chose that segment to contrast with the "Hal is so soft and delicate" bits from Havemercy. I think they would have done better to write about teenage boys in a "semirealistic" setting (I can't believe I just called the Potterverse semirealistic- I guess I mean contemporary with or without magic tacked on).

They do a good job with characters we don't really see in the books -Pettigrew, for instance- you almost get why he'd fall in with the DE crowd and his motivations there- and also they manage to write James as a

likable

jerk, which is not the easiest thing to pull off.

Mostly, I mean that they can write boys who are goofy and dorky and shy and pull pranks on each other, and who like each other, without getting taken over by teh gay like poor Hal (and, to be honest, a hell of a lot of slash fanfic)

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Wardog

at 12:22 on 2009-10-05I just wanted to say, I like the bit you quoted and I see why you quoted it. I think the fandom/not-fandom thing is, for this, largely irrelevant - the point is it shows them having something like a clue. I can only presume they threw said clue out of the window when they came to write Havemercy. I don't know how could they could from this quite harsh, quite 'realistic' depication of a clumsy boykiss to soft melting girly Hal.

Seriously, ladies, what the hell happened to you?

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valse de la lune

at 12:26 on 2011-12-08Necroing this to note: the things you've said about slash and fandom here would have gotten you absolutely

eviscerated

in some circles and, probably, called a raging misogynist or something. Slash fandom has become this weird sacred cow thing to some social-justice types. It's bizarre and also reminds me that, in my flailing desperation to seek out more lesbian representation, all the attention is always given to the hot gay boys--consider the Rachel Manija Brown thing and the "say yes to gay in YA." All of which always made me comfortable too because, uhm, we're still raising a big giant fuss about a couple of straight white ladies who wrote this gay Asian--Japanese?--boy. Wow gosh, they are so brave! Deepa D.

expressed her misgivings

better than I could. tl;dr even if I don't think much of her writing on a technical level, Malinda Lo's Asian lesbian girls > this crap by an order of magnitude of fifty thousand.

but there’s something horribly tokenistic about this parade of brand new, card carrying poofters. I’d better refine that slightly. It’s not that they are there to be token gays, but there is something about their homosexuality that feels tokenistic.

That seems to be a thing which plagues pretty much all former HP fanfic authors who "graduated" to writing YA. And, well, there's probably a reason the YA reader/writer subset is so strangely insular and so very, very like fandom.

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Wardog

at 14:39 on 2011-12-10Yes, I'm slightly more aware of the discussions / context of the role of homosexuality in fandom these days so I might express myself a little better ... but I do kind of stand by my comments. And although I'd rather people didn't come and bite my face off and make me sad ... well ... yeah. It's just everything about the portrayal of a gay relationship in Havemercy brings me out in HIVES.

As I'm sure we've discussed before I have no problems with people getting off on hot (potentially not very dudely) guys sexing each other up - but when you claim that's *representation* then it's *appropriative*.

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valse de la lune

at 18:09 on 2011-12-12No, I agree with you and don't mean to bite your face off by any means!

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Wardog

at 18:45 on 2011-12-12Hehe, not you! I meant an angry fandom complaining about me impugning them :)

[garden-ghoul]

appendix blog, part 3

“working out... is.... good?”

Hey so I’m skipping Eorl, I already blogged him, or at least I read him. I don’t conceptually separate those processes any more, thanks fiends. I, uh, I meant to type friends there but let’s call it a Freudian typo.

Ah fuck yes after the list of Rohirrim kings it’s time for DURIN’S FOLK

So “Durin is the name that the Dwarves used for the eldest of the Seven Fathers of their race.” Are we ever going to hear about the other six fathers, or is it one of those things where dwarves are extremely close-mouthed about it and only Durin, who they cannot ever shut up about, is ever mentioned near other races?

Durin “slept alone” until the awakening of his people. Did all dwarves sleep alone? Is this a gem kindergarten situation? Please say yes. Please say there is a Durin-shaped hole somewhere that is only known to dwarves and they like, sometimes try to fit themselves into it. The one who is the same size and shape as the original Durin becomes Durin the N+1th. “This hole was made for me,” he declares, and fits himself into it. Everyone cheers, and then they fish him out with a hook before he can slide too far into the mountain. Anyway during the time of Durin VI the dwarves, who are in an absolutely defensible position but are too bored to stop mining, wake up a balrog and have to flee. Durin VI’s son Nain goes to Erebor and finds a very nice rock; most of the Khazad-dum dwarves go to the Grey Mountains in the north, because exploring is fun and profitable! Unfortunately north of the mountain everything is full of dragons. “At last Dáin I, together with Frór his second son, was slain at the door of his hall by a great cold-drake.” I really like the implication I just made up, that the north is full of dragons because they migrated from Angband.

BTW Dain’s other sons are Thror and Gror. Apparently there’s something absolutely essential about the fabric of Ea that makes all peoples independently name their kids dumb themed names. Someone during the Song of Songs or w/e they’re calling it these days accidentally kept repeating one of their trills and it became a line of code essential to the nature of life. Fuck this.

Thror goes to Erebor again, and he makes lots of friendly alliances with other dwarf clans and the humans who live near Erebor (’northmen’). UNFORTUNATELY you cannot have a great and extremely wealthy time around here without a dragon hearing about it, so Smaug the Golden comes to say hi. Thrain II and his dad Thror (original flavor) flee in secret, and then Thror goes into Khazad-dum (possibly it was a suggestion of his Ring). Thror’s bff creeps over to the doors of Khazad-dum and a bunch of orcs are hiding behind the doorframe with Thror’s corpse, presumably working his jaw like a puppet, and laughing their asses off. Written on Thror’s face is the word AZOG. He is king of Khazad-dum now. Thror’s bff tries to take his body for burial, but the orcs throw a sack of small change at his head. It sounds pretty funny to me, but for Nar it’s probably a horrifying parody of a weregild, and an insult. When he looks back, the orcs are hacking up Thror’s body to feed to the local crows. Omg I hope orcs and crows are friends.

Thrain and Nar muster a ton of dwarves to fight, because this will not be borne. They cut through most of the orc strongholds like butter BUT Azog has been saving his strength in Khazad-dum. “So began the Battle of Azanulbizar, at the memory of which the Orcs still shudder and the Dwarves weep.” I LOVE. The fact that absolutely everyone who was involved with this battle in any way has inherited trauma about it. War is no good for anyone at all! Azog has a jolly old time doing murders, until he realizes that HIS guys are actually getting more murdered! He kills Nain and laughs at him, but Nain’s son Dain unexpectedly kills him. It’s accounted extremely heroic, because Dain is like, 16 in dwarf years. It says that “long life and many battles lay before him, until old but unbowed he fell at last in the War of the Ring.” Wait um. Do you mean... the one that takes place in Lord of the Rings? Were dwarves fighting in that?? This is taking place WAY after the Last Alliance isn’t it?? No okay I looked at the end and found the answer, which is that the War of the Ring actually was like 100 years long but relatively low-intensity for most of it.

Anyway,

When at last the battle was won the Dwarves that were left gathered in Azanulbizar. They took the head of Azog and thrust into its mouth the purse of small money, and then they set it on a stake. But no feast nor song was there that night; for their dead were beyond the count of grief. Barely half of their number, it is said, could still stand or had hope of healing.  

Half of everyone is dead or dying, and the dwarf alliance still uses their last bit of energy to be petty. Iconic.

Thrain wants to claim Khazad-dum and live there, but everyone else flat-out refuses. Still a balrog in there, dude! I mean, it didn’t bother the orcs, though. I don’t think balrogs really discriminate between orcs and other sorts of dudes, so maybe they could sneak up and kill it in its sleep! But Dain says that the world must change and some other power come before Durin’s folk will live again in Moria. That was Gandalf, right? He did slay the balrog. I hope the dwarves can come back now in the fourth age!! It’s going to take so much fixing up but like... it still exists, mostly intact. A chance to reclaim their heritage.

Thrain and his son Thorin go into exile with the few people who will still follow him--almost everyone is pissed that he got their entire families killed and they can’t even go get treasure in Khazad-dum. So Thrain and co settle in the east of Ered Luin. There’s a bit here about how the Seven Rings turned out to be totally pointless for Sauron because you simply Cannot enslave dwarves.  “They were made from their beginning of a kind to resist most steadfastly any domination. Though they could be slain or broken, they could not be reduced to shadows enslaved to another will.” I love the implication that because dwarves were sculpted--note that we never hear AFAIK what elves or humans are made of!--they are more substantial and solid. Mmm I think they have a super solid connection to Arda, and just as even Arda Marred is still largely influenced by the Valar dwarves cannot be wholly corrupted. IDK it’s just the,,, shadow vs stone thing. Sauron enslaves people and it destroys their substance. Dwarves are too substantial? Someone help me out here.

Thrain is still influenced by the Ring, though, driven to go in search of Erebor and its treasure again.  

As soon as he was abroad with few companions he was hunted by the emissaries of Sauron. Wolves pursued him, Orcs waylaid him, evil birds shadowed his path, and the more he strove to go north the more misfortunes opposed him. There came a dark night when he and his companions were wandering in the land beyond Anduin, and they were driven by a black rain to take shelter under the eaves of Mirkwood. In the morning he was gone from the camp, and his companions called him in vain...

I love how fairy-tale-ish this passage is. Wolves pursued him! Evil birds shadowed his path! He vanished utterly into air! Sauron was the boojum all along! I’m jazzed about this. Less jazzed about the following explanation: he was kidnapped and tortured in Dol Guldur. Whatever, I guess.

Meanwhile Thorin, who is now king, hammers away on his anvil. It will keep his arm strong. Hella.

Thorin meets Gandalf by accident in an inn in Bree and is like “hey I have been having dreams about you, that’s pretty weird right?” “No no,” says Gandalf, “actually I have been dreaming about you too.” And THAT is how The Hobbit happened.

Wait omg it says here Fili and Kili are Thorin’s “sister-sons.” THIS IMPLIES THE EXISTENCE OF A SECOND DWARF GENDER... WTF... don’t fucking toy with my heart like this Johnald. AH--

Dís was the daughter of Thráin II. She is the only dwarf-woman named in these histories. It was said by Gimli that there are few dwarf-women, probably no more than a third of the whole people. They seldom walk abroad except at great need. They are in voice and appearance, and in garb if they must go on a journey, so like to the dwarf-men that the eyes and ears of other peoples cannot tell them apart. This has given rise to the foolish opinion among Men that there are no dwarf-women, and that the Dwarves 'grow out of stone'. 

 It is because of the fewness of women among them that the kind of the Dwarves increases slowly, and is in peril when they have no secure dwellings. For Dwarves take only one wife or husband each in their lives, and are jealous, as in all matters of their rights. The number of dwarf-men that marry is actually less than one-third. For not all the women take husbands: some desire none; some desire one that they cannot get, and so will have no other.

Why did they even mention Dis? She doesn’t do anything. I’m retconning, this, obviously. Dwarves just have a super low fertility rate, and woman gender is one of those things that like... doesn’t translate well. There’s no woman gender, because dwarves haven’t invented gender. There’s just dwarves who are currently capable of bearing children. I can’t remember if I got this from Pratchett or not, but it’s a good chance. I just really like the idea that dwarves kind of nod and smile uncertainly when asked to understand a culture that has genders. “Humans really do have an exceptionally high fertility rate,” murmurs one to another. “A lot of ‘women.’” “One just can’t keep track of them,” sighs the other. This is kind of incoherent because Tolkien is actively trying to ruin it, but whatever. Moving on.

After the fall of Sauron, Gimli brought south a part of the Dwarf-folk of Erebor, and he became Lord of the Glittering Caves. He and his people did great works in Gondor and Rohan. For Minas Tirith they forged gates of mithril and steel to replace those broken by the Witch-king. Legolas his friend also brought south Elves out of Greenwood, and they dwelt in Ithilien, and it became once again the fairest country in all the westlands.

Nice! Gay! Also holy shit, mithril gates. Where the hell did they get all that. Hey maybe Sauron had a huge stockpile of mithril and some people went to sift thru the wreckage of Mordor and reclaim it. Radical.

We have heard tell that Legolas took Gimli Glóin's son with him because of their great friendship, greater than any that has been between Elf and Dwarf. If this is true, then it is strange indeed: that a Dwarf should be willing to leave Middle-earth for any love, or that the Eldar should receive him, or that the Lords of the West should permit it.

Hey. Hey. That’s gay.

[readbookywooks]

26 Out in the hall, I find Paylor standing in exactly the same spot. "Did you find what you were looking for?" she asks. I hold up the white bud in answer and then stumble past her. I must have made it back to my room, because the next thing I know, I'm filling a glass with water from the bathroom faucet and sticking the rose in it. I sink to my knees on the cold tile and squint at the flower, as the whiteness seems hard to focus on in the stark fluorescent light. My finger catches the inside of my bracelet, twisting it like a tourniquet, hurting my wrist. I'm hoping the pain will help me hang on to reality the way it did for Peeta. I must hang on. I must know the truth about what has happened. There are two possibilities, although the details associated with them may vary. First, as I've believed, that the Capitol sent in that hovercraft, dropped the parachutes, and sacrificed its children's lives, knowing the recently arrived rebels would go to their aid. There's evidence to support this. The Capitol's seal on the hovercraft, the lack of any attempt to blow the enemy out of the sky, and their long history of using children as pawns in their battle against the districts. Then there's Snow's account. That a Capitol hovercraft manned by rebels bombed the children to bring a speedy end to the war. But if this was the case, why didn't the Capitol fire on the enemy? Did the element of surprise throw them? Had they no defenses left? Children are precious to 13, or so it has always seemed. Well, not me, maybe. Once I had outlived my usefulness, I was expendable. Although I think it's been a long time since I've been considered a child in this war. And why would they do it knowing their own medics would likely respond and be taken out by the second blast? They wouldn't. They couldn't. Snow's lying. Manipulating me as he always has. Hoping to turn me against the rebels and possibly destroy them. Yes. Of course. Then what's nagging at me? Those double-exploding bombs, for one. It's not that the Capitol couldn't have the same weapon, it's just that I'm sure the rebels did. Gale and Beetee's brainchild. Then there's the fact that Snow made no escape attempt, when I know him to be the consummate survivor. It seems hard to believe he didn't have a retreat somewhere, some bunker stocked with provisions where he could live out the rest of his snaky little life. And finally, there's his assessment of Coin. What's irrefutable is that she's done exactly what he said. Let the Capitol and the districts run one another into the ground and then sauntered in to take power. Even if that was her plan, it doesn't mean she dropped those parachutes. Victory was already in her grasp. Everything was in her grasp. Except me. I recall Boggs's response when I admitted I hadn't put much thought into Snow's successor. "If your immediate answer isn't Coin, then you're a threat. You're the face of the rebellion. You may have more influence than any other single person. Outwardly, the most you've ever done is tolerated her." Suddenly, I'm thinking of Prim, who was not yet fourteen, not yet old enough to be granted the title of soldier, but somehow working on the front lines. How did such a thing happen? That my sister would have wanted to be there, I have no doubt. That she would be more capable than many older than she is a given. But for all that, someone very high up would have had to approve putting a thirteen-year-old in combat. Did Coin do it, hoping that losing Prim would push me completely over the edge? Or, at least, firmly on her side? I wouldn't even have had to witness it in person. Numerous cameras would be covering the City Circle. Capturing the moment forever. No, now I am going crazy, slipping into some state of paranoia. Too many people would know of the mission. Word would get out. Or would it? Who would have to know besides Coin, Plutarch, and a small, loyal or easily disposable crew? I badly need help working this out, only everyone I trust is dead. Cinna. Boggs. Finnick. Prim. There's Peeta, but he couldn't do any more than speculate, and who knows what state his mind's in, anyway. And that leaves only Gale. He's far away, but even if he were beside me, could I confide in him? What could I say, how could I phrase it, without implying that it was his bomb that killed Prim? The impossibility of that idea, more than any, is why Snow must be lying. Ultimately, there's only one person to turn to who might know what happened and might still be on my side. To broach the subject at all will be a risk. But while I think Haymitch might gamble with my life in the arena, I don't think he'd rat me out to Coin. Whatever problems we may have with each other, we prefer resolving our differences one-on-one. I scramble off the tiles, out the door, and across the hall to his room. When there's no response to my knock, I push inside. Ugh. It's amazing how quickly he can defile a space. Half-eaten plates of food, shattered liquor bottles, and pieces of broken furniture from a drunken rampage scatter his quarters. He lies, unkempt and unwashed, in a tangle of sheets on the bed, passed out. "Haymitch," I say, shaking his leg. Of course, that's insufficient. But I give it a few more tries before I dump the pitcher of water in his face. He comes to with a gasp, slashing blindly with his knife. Apparently, the end of Snow's reign didn't equal the end of his terror. "Oh. You," he says. I can tell by his voice that he's still loaded. "Haymitch," I begin. "Listen to that. The Mockingjay found her voice." He laughs. "Well, Plutarch's going to be happy." He takes a swig from a bottle. "Why am I soaking wet?" I lamely drop the pitcher behind me into a pile of dirty clothes. "I need your help," I say. Haymitch belches, filling the air with white liquor fumes. "What is it, sweetheart? More boy trouble?" I don't know why, but this hurts me in a way Haymitch rarely can. It must show on my face, because even in his drunken state, he tries to take it back. "Okay, not funny." I'm already at the door. "Not funny! Come back!" By the thud of his body hitting the floor, I assume he tried to follow me, but there's no point. I zigzag through the mansion and disappear into a wardrobe full of silken things. I yank them from hangers until I have a pile and then burrow into it. In the lining of my pocket, I find a stray morphling tablet and swallow it dry, heading off my rising hysteria. It's not enough to right things, though. I hear Haymitch calling me in the distance, but he won't find me in his condition. Especially not in this new spot. Swathed in silk, I feel like a caterpillar in a cocoon awaiting metamorphosis. I always supposed that to be a peaceful condition. At first it is. But as I journey into night, I feel more and more trapped, suffocated by the slippery bindings, unable to emerge until I have transformed into something of beauty. I squirm, trying to shed my ruined body and unlock the secret to growing flawless wings. Despite enormous effort, I remain a hideous creature, fired into my current form by the blast from the bombs. The encounter with Snow opens the door to my old repertoire of nightmares. It's like being stung by tracker jackers again. A wave of horrifying images with a brief respite I confuse with waking - only to find another wave knocking me back. When the guards finally locate me, I'm sitting on the floor of the wardrobe, tangled in silk, screaming my head off. I fight them at first, until they convince me they're trying to help, peel away the choking garments, and escort me back to my room. On the way, we pass a window and I see a gray, snowy dawn spreading across the Capitol. A very hungover Haymitch waits with a handful of pills and a tray of food that neither of us has the stomach for. He makes a feeble attempt to get me to talk again but, seeing it's pointless, sends me to a bath someone has drawn. The tub's deep, with three steps to the bottom. I ease down into the warm water and sit, up to my neck in suds, hoping the medicines kick in soon. My eyes focus on the rose that has spread its petals overnight, filling the steamy air with its strong perfume. I rise and reach for a towel to smother it, when there's a tentative knock and the bathroom door opens, revealing three familiar faces. They try to smile at me, but even Venia can't conceal her shock at my ravaged mutt body. "Surprise!" Octavia squeaks, and then bursts into tears. I'm puzzling over their reappearance when I realize that this must be it, the day of the execution. They've come to prep me for the cameras. Remake me to Beauty Base Zero. No wonder Octavia's crying. It's an impossible task. They can barely touch my patchwork of skin for fear of hurting me, so I rinse and dry off myself. I tell them I hardly notice the pain anymore, but Flavius still winces as he drapes a robe around me. In the bedroom, I find another surprise. Sitting upright in a chair. Polished from her metallic gold wig to her patent leather high heels, gripping a clipboard. Remarkably unchanged except for the vacant look in her eyes. "Effie," I say. "Hello, Katniss." She stands and kisses me on the cheek as if nothing has occurred since our last meeting, the night before the Quarter Quell. "Well, it looks like we've got another big, big, big day ahead of us. So why don't you start your prep and I'll just pop over and check on the arrangements." "Okay," I say to her back. "They say Plutarch and Haymitch had a hard time keeping her alive," comments Venia under her breath. "She was imprisoned after your escape, so that helps." It's quite a stretch. Effie Trinket, rebel. But I don't want Coin killing her, so I make a mental note to present her that way if asked. "I guess it's good Plutarch kidnapped you three after all." "We're the only prep team still alive. And all the stylists from the Quarter Quell are dead," says Venia. She doesn't say who specifically killed them. I'm beginning to wonder if it matters. She gingerly takes one of my scarred hands and holds it out for inspection. "Now, what do you think for the nails? Red or maybe a jet black?" Flavius performs some beauty miracle on my hair, managing to even out the front while getting some of the longer locks to hide the bald spots in the back. My face, since it was spared from the flames, presents no more than the usual challenges. Once I'm in Cinna's Mockingjay suit, the only scars visible are on my neck, forearms, and hands. Octavia secures my Mockingjay pin over my heart and we step back to look in the mirror. I can't believe how normal they've made me look on the outside when inwardly I'm such a wasteland. There's a tap at the door and Gale steps in. "Can I have a minute?" he asks. In the mirror, I watch my prep team. Unsure of where to go, they bump into one another a few times and then closet themselves in the bathroom. Gale comes up behind me and we examine each other's reflection. I'm searching for something to hang on to, some sign of the girl and boy who met by chance in the woods five years ago and became inseparable. I'm wondering what would have happened to them if the Hunger Games had not reaped the girl. If she would have fallen in love with the boy, married him even. And sometime in the future, when the brothers and sisters had been raised up, escaped with him into the woods and left 12 behind forever. Would they have been happy, out in the wild, or would the dark, twisted sadness between them have grown up even without the Capitol's help? "I brought you this." Gale holds up a sheath. When I take it, I notice it holds a single, ordinary arrow. "It's supposed to be symbolic. You firing the last shot of the war." "What if I miss?" I say. "Does Coin retrieve it and bring it back to me? Or just shoot Snow through the head herself?" "You won't miss." Gale adjusts the sheath on my shoulder. We stand there, face-to-face, not meeting each other's eyes. "You didn't come see me in the hospital." He doesn't answer, so finally I just say it. "Was it your bomb?" "I don't know. Neither does Beetee," he says. "Does it matter? You'll always be thinking about it." He waits for me to deny it; I want to deny it, but it's true. Even now I can see the flash that ignites her, feel the heat of the flames. And I will never be able to separate that moment from Gale. My silence is my answer. "That was the one thing I had going for me. Taking care of your family," he says. "Shoot straight, okay?" He touches my cheek and leaves. I want to call him back and tell him that I was wrong. That I'll figure out a way to make peace with this. To remember the circumstances under which he created the bomb. Take into account my own inexcusable crimes. Dig up the truth about who dropped the parachutes. Prove it wasn't the rebels. Forgive him. But since I can't, I'll just have to deal with the pain. Effie comes in to usher me to some kind of meeting. I collect my bow and at the last minute remember the rose, glistening in its glass of water. When I open the door to the bathroom, I find my prep team sitting in a row on the edge of the tub, hunched and defeated. I remember I'm not the only one whose world has been stripped away. "Come on," I tell them. "We've got an audience waiting." I'm expecting a production meeting in which Plutarch instructs me where to stand and gives me my cue for shooting Snow. Instead, I find myself sent into a room where six people sit around a table. Peeta, Johanna, Beetee, Haymitch, Annie, and Enobaria. They all wear the gray rebel uniforms from 13. No one looks particularly well. "What's this?" I say. "We're not sure," Haymitch answers. "It appears to be a gathering of the remaining victors." "We're all that's left?" I ask. "The price of celebrity," says Beetee. "We were targeted from both sides. The Capitol killed the victors they suspected of being rebels. The rebels killed those thought to be allied with the Capitol." Johanna scowls at Enobaria. "So what's she doing here?" "She is protected under what we call the Mockingjay Deal," says Coin as she enters behind me. "Wherein Katniss Everdeen agreed to support the rebels in exchange for captured victors' immunity. Katniss has upheld her side of the bargain, and so shall we." Enobaria smiles at Johanna. "Don't look so smug," says Johanna. "We'll kill you anyway." "Sit down, please, Katniss," says Coin, closing the door. I take a seat between Annie and Beetee, carefully placing Snow's rose on the table. As usual, Coin gets right to the point. "I've asked you here to settle a debate. Today we will execute Snow. In the previous weeks, hundreds of his accomplices in the oppression of Panem have been tried and now await their own deaths. However, the suffering in the districts has been so extreme that these measures appear insufficient to the victims. In fact, many are calling for a complete annihilation of those who held Capitol citizenship. However, in the interest of maintaining a sustainable population, we cannot afford this." Through the water in the glass, I see a distorted image of one of Peeta's hands. The burn marks. We are both fire mutts now. My eyes travel up to where the flames licked across his forehead, singeing away his brows but just missing his eyes. Those same blue eyes that used to meet mine and then flit away at school. Just as they do now. "So, an alternative has been placed on the table. Since my colleagues and I can come to no consensus, it has been agreed that we will let the victors decide. A majority of four will approve the plan. No one may abstain from the vote," says Coin. "What has been proposed is that in lieu of eliminating the entire Capitol population, we have a final, symbolic Hunger Games, using the children directly related to those who held the most power." All seven of us turn to her. "What?" says Johanna. "We hold another Hunger Games using Capitol children," says Coin. "Are you joking?" asks Peeta. "No. I should also tell you that if we do hold the Games, it will be known it was done with your approval, although the individual breakdown of your votes will be kept secret for your own security," Coin tells us. "Was this Plutarch's idea?" asks Haymitch. "It was mine," says Coin. "It seemed to balance the need for vengeance with the least loss of life. You may cast your votes." "No!" bursts out Peeta. "I vote no, of course! We can't have another Hunger Games!" "Why not?" Johanna retorts. "It seems very fair to me. Snow even has a granddaughter. I vote yes." "So do I," says Enobaria, almost indifferently. "Let them have a taste of their own medicine." "This is why we rebelled! Remember?" Peeta looks at the rest of us. "Annie?" "I vote no with Peeta," she says. "So would Finnick if he were here." "But he isn't, because Snow's mutts killed him," Johanna reminds her. "No," says Beetee. "It would set a bad precedent. We have to stop viewing one another as enemies. At this point, unity is essential for our survival. No." "We're down to Katniss and Haymitch," says Coin. Was it like this then? Seventy-five years or so ago? Did a group of people sit around and cast their votes on initiating the Hunger Games? Was there dissent? Did someone make a case for mercy that was beaten down by the calls for the deaths of the districts' children? The scent of Snow's rose curls up into my nose, down into my throat, squeezing it tight with despair. All those people I loved, dead, and we are discussing the next Hunger Games in an attempt to avoid wasting life. Nothing has changed. Nothing will ever change now. I weigh my options carefully, think everything through. Keeping my eyes on the rose, I say, "I vote yes...for Prim." "Haymitch, it's up to you," says Coin. A furious Peeta hammers Haymitch with the atrocity he could become party to, but I can feel Haymitch watching me. This is the moment, then. When we find out exactly just how alike we are, and how much he truly understands me. "I'm with the Mockingjay," he says. "Excellent. That carries the vote," says Coin. "Now we really must take our places for the execution." As she passes me, I hold up the glass with the rose. "Can you see that Snow's wearing this? Just over his heart?" Coin smiles. "Of course. And I'll make sure he knows about the Games." "Thank you," I say. People sweep into the room, surround me. The last touch of powder, the instructions from Plutarch as I'm guided to the front doors of the mansion. The City Circle runs over, spills people down the side streets. The others take their places outside. Guards. Officials. Rebel leaders. Victors. I hear the cheers that indicate Coin has appeared on the balcony. Then Effie taps my shoulder, and I step out into the cold winter sunlight. Walk to my position, accompanied by the deafening roar of the crowd. As directed, I turn so they see me in profile, and wait. When they march Snow out the door, the audience goes insane. They secure his hands behind a post, which is unnecessary. He's not going anywhere. There's nowhere to go. This is not the roomy stage before the Training Center but the narrow terrace in front of the president's mansion. No wonder no one bothered to have me practice. He's ten yards away. I feel the bow purring in my hand. Reach back and grasp the arrow. Position it, aim at the rose, but watch his face. He coughs and a bloody dribble runs down his chin. His tongue flicks over his puffy lips. I search his eyes for the slightest sign of anything, fear, remorse, anger. But there's only the same look of amusement that ended our last conversation. It's as if he's speaking the words again. "Oh, my dear Miss Everdeen. I thought we had agreed not to lie to each other." He's right. We did. The point of my arrow shifts upward. I release the string. And President Coin collapses over the side of the balcony and plunges to the ground. Dead.