#i think im one of them but ive also never wanted bigger lips really

[brunetterightsactivist]

the beauty that would be revealed in the world if all lip filler dissolved overnight. i would love to see it

[uptightgirl]

What way or ways do you like to masturbate? And if you’re comfortable explaining why you’re scared to penetrate yourself (finger or object)?

thank you for the ask, i really liked this one! so this is how i masturbate:

1. sit or lay with my back in my bed, spread my legs and touch my clit with my right hand, usually in circles, until i cum, but i think I take so many time this way

2. also in bed, im on my knees, face resting in a pillow, and rub my clit, also with my right hand, usually in circles until I cum. i think this way is so much better because my clit doesnt get trapped between my lips, it also gets more sensitive for some reason i dont know, and the lubrification from my vagina goes directly to the clit

i like to touch myself reading some erotica about female orgasm denial or something, i like to imagine that situation, to feel what they are feeling, but I usually cum while they are being denied, i cant control, its bigger than me

if you have more questions about my masturbation, dont be shy, you can ask anything!

about penetration, i dont know why exactly :( growing up in a christian house, going to those young christian meetings the church forces us to go for catechesis and listen to them talking about how bad masturbation is, etc, probably have some influence, but many people from the same background can do these things without shame, so idk.

i think the main reason is because I never wanted to be on trouble, so i never did things that maybe i could regret. i remember, when i was under 18, to be very afraid of braking the hymen just for riding an exercise bike or siting at some low wall, because a hypothetical doctor would see it and dont believe that I was a virgin.

but now im 20 years old and I want to know how it is inside of me, if I like the sensation, if it feels good or bad, but I just cant! i know there is a hole somewhere, but maybe its too small? sometimes i like to imagine that there is a dick or a dildo inside of me, in and out in my pussy, and it helps me to cum faster. i think i have the potential to cum only with penetration, I just cant penetrate!

lately ive been thinking about those pussy dilators, but I dont have a place to hide at this moment, so it will keep in my imagination

maybe it is just fear of the unknown, also i need to try to finger myself more often. i think would be easier if i had a partner, but I dont have any, so I need to find something else to motivate me. if you have any suggestion, any tip, anything that could help, I will be very happy to read!

[proxythe]

Any headcanons for the sees members?

Also plus piercing/ lgbt hcs as well 🫣

yessuh let me think … u gotta stay with me here bc i’m so bad at just thinking of regular headcanons

- im ngl ive been big into aki being a glasses wearer lately … like he seriously needs them but never wears them. just stubborn and blind as hell

- this is a popular one but i feel like i haven’t said it in a while: minato & kotone being twins. they obviously look nothing alike canonically but i try to give them very similar features when i draw them (like their nose and mouth) as well as a little beauty mark by their lip

- i love aigis wearing kotone’s clothes. i usually draw this represented by aigis wearing pink to imply its not her own clothes (cuz we all know she normally loves a blue outfit) but i think it’s super cute to imagine. oh & in general i like to give aigis a lot of baggy casual clothes instead of her usual dresses and whatnot. i just like to picture all of sees fashion senses rubbing off on her in different ways

- yukari is scared of ghosts but not horror movies, while junpei doesn’t believe in ghosts but horror movies scare him. im not sure at all if horror is ever brought up honestly i can’t remember but i always thought it would be funny that yukari is so jumpy about ghosts but she’s unimpressed with horror movies, while junpei teases her about ghosts but then a horror movie will have him up scared for a week. trust, he stays denying it scared him

to not make this long as hell, i’ll stop there and get to the rest of ur ask… cutting it bc i always feel like a long ass post will look so cluttered

for my lgbt hcs i kinda fluctuate but its fine:

minato/kotone: bisexual … basically canon for kotone, but i see it for minato as well. i’m pretty open to any kotone gender hc, i personally never thought about it for her. minato tho i think i mainly enjoy nonbinary or transfem minato 😭 but it still is the same that im pretty open to any gender hcs for him as well

yukari: lesbian. immediate answer. i’ve brought this up before feels like forever ago but i am a transmasc yukari enjoyer. it sucks because when i thought about it the first time i remember i had a really big explanation for it that had me hype as hell but now i can’t remember and i just passively enjoy it LOL

junpei: he’s all over the place. i think the cishet ally junpei is really funny just bc it makes me laugh when the whole lgbt friend group just has the one straight guy BUT i also enjoy junmina in every sense so i think i dabble in a little bisexual junpei sometimes …

fuuka: she kinda just gives me unlabeled vibes in sexuality. i had an initial sexuality hc for her but junfuuka started growing on me so i changed it in my head … but i really really love trans girl fuuka i think it’s one of my fav hcs for her <3

akihiko: i feel like i view him gay but i also refer to him as bisexual when i think it’s funny LMFAOOO one thing i keep consistent is that i think he’s trans. basically canon to me. i know the boobs and gorgeous face combo throw some people off but i never imagined he’d want to cut them off so i don’t depict that

mitsuru: lesbian & trans woman. i think oomfs have made transmasc mitsuru grow on me too but i personally mainly view her as a trans woman. also basically canon to me. it’s another one that just comes so naturally that i forget it’s not true

shinji: i don’t imagine he would really care about labels. i think he’d fall in line with being a guy, he/him, whatever but like deep down i don’t think he’d really give af. same with sexuality. he likes who he likes i don’t think he’d make a big deal of it. his gender and sexuality is summed up to “i got bigger things to worry about than this”

LMFAOOO sorry long ass section but for piercings i think it’ll be shorter STAY WITH ME!!!!!!! tbh i think most would just be a normal ass ear piercing so i’m sorry in advance …

- first off… i can see yukari and mitsuru with regular ear piercings. yukari maybe a cunty belly button piercing but i think only like post canon/p4au yukari would get it tbh

- mitsuru with a nose piercing maybe … i honestly can’t imagine mitsuru would ever have many besides the regular ear ones but i can see her with like a stud… i feel like it’s one of those piercings a person would never realize she had unless they looked really close at her face. it’s on her emo bang side so it gets covered

- i can actually imagine junpei with some normal ass ear piercings. but that’s as far as he’d go bc i think the piercing gun/needle would make him cry a lil bit

- kotone seems like she’d do ears as well 😭 if im leaning into a Way more emo minato then i can actually see him with a few like ears/lips/etc. but regular him i don’t think he’d do any … im so sorry omg

- i draw/imagine shinji without any but ive seen people depict him with a tongue piercing before. i lowkey fw it. it’s hidden so i think he’d like something like that … otherwise i can’t imagine him with much

i’m sorry from the bottom of my heart for the lackluster piercing hcs bc i also enjoy piercings a lot visually but realistically i felt like sees wouldn’t really do much 😭😭 they’re too boring !!!

anyways this was long as hell but super fun so thank you for asking !!! i love going to my mind place

[lunatic-fandom-space]

Ludwig (1973)

I went through so much trouble to watch this stupid film and it took me so long to watch it because its four hours long and I kept getting headaches while watching and had to keep taking breaks, but it was all worth it because this film was so unbearably unbelievably good, its my favorite thing in this whole marathon so far by a long shot

Its so good Im actually having trouble talking about it because I truly have no complaints, but I cant just talk about what I liked either because its basically everything. The pacing was great, it could get slow at times but it was never unengaging and if it werent for my headaches I wouldve definitely been able to watch the whole film in one sitting, which is high praise coming from my low attention span-ass. I feel like I never really mention the cinematography in these posts because its usually just fine in a very unremarkable way, but it was absolutely amazing in this one, the framing and composition of every scene felt so deliberate, its like every shot was a painting.

The acting was incredible, I was a little unsure about some of the performances initially because this is an english-language film mostly starring actors who are very noticeably not native english-speakers and I thought it would interfere with their acting because idk, some of the early line-deliveries had that kind of stilted kid-having-to-read-something-outloud-in-english-class quality to them, but that ended up not being the case at all. Helmut Berger as Ludwig was especially great, he did such a good job capturing him, both in the very beginning when he's this naive romantic/idealist and later in the film when he becomes more disillusioned and unhinged. He was also very babygirl, similar to the actor who played him in Ludwig — Glanz und Ende eines Königs (1955), so I liked that. Romy Schneider of the Sissi-trilogy played Elisabeth here as well and I really liked her too, she's still very charismatic and I think she did a great job with this more flawed and less romanticised portrayal.

To be honest, I was really expecting Elisabeth to play a bigger role in this film, I think the synopsis that I read gave me the impression that it would show both of their lives and sortof parallel them or something, but that wasnt the case, it was really just Ludwig's life, from his coronation to his death, and Elisabeth was in it sometimes because theyre important to each other and like to spend time together. They have some romantic tension and they even kiss each other on the lips in one scene, which suprised me, but it wasnt really elaborated on, it causes some drama between her and Sophie when she's engaged, but after they break it off the film mostly focuses on Ludwig's relationships with men while focusing less on Elisabeth as he starts to isolate himself. Also, speaking of his relationships with men, I am very disappointed to tell you that there was not nearly as much sexual tension between him and and Richard Wagner as in the other film. for shame.

Anyway, I cant really think of a way to organically transition into the next section, and theres really only one last thing that I wanted to talk about, so Im just gonna talk about it. I said earlier that this was an english-language film but it also has a lot of sections in italian and bits in german. Now, the german bits are like, theres a scene where Sophie sings a song from a german opera and whenever theres large crowds shouting stuff theyre shouting in german (like at the very end when theyre all looking for Ludwig after he went outside with his doctor), which I like because I feel like it adds a certain authenticity to those scenes, but the italian parts are just kinda confusing to me. The film has these little talking heads segments where its characters from the film, usually right before they take an active role in the story, talking about like, Ludwig's downfall is how I'd describe it (except for Richard Hornig, hes just like "Ive been his confidant for 10 years and thats all Im gonna say" which is cool), and the first few of those segments are in italian while the rest of the film is in english, so I initially assumed that those would be the only italian parts, but then we get a scene of Ludwig and Elisabeth talking that starts in english but then in the middle of it, theyre just suddenly speaking italian. And thats something that keeps happening throughout, sometimes theres just random italian scenes or scenes that randomly switch into italian, and some of those talking heads segments are inexplicably english, its very strange and honestly pretty jarring, I had to keep switching between the raw film and a version with english subtitles to properly keep up. So I guess that would be my one complaint for this film, but honestly Im not even sure if it was meant to be viewed that way ?? Like, the wikipedia page doesnt mention the fact that this movie was filmed in two languages even though I feel like that would be worth mentioning, and the italian parts all have this dubbed-in quality to them, like the audio quality is a bit different and Ludwig's voice sounds completely different when he's speaking italian vs when he's speaking english, its weird. But I mean, it didnt disturb my experience watching this, its basically just giving me an excuse to make my very own subtitles which Im looking forward to because itll give me the chance to rewatch it

So yeah, that's it. In conclusion, this film is really great and you should definitely watch it if you have four hours to spare and no headache

[vensulove]

2022’s favorite skin care, makeup, and fragrances

i was tagged by @chiveburger (💕🌸💗✨🌸💗) and i really loved reading through theirs and the user that tagged them and on and on! i love makeup and skincare, but it can be hard sometimes because I have really bad eczema and get it on my face and neck a lot!! i tag @cheekblush @artismonkeys @nosekiss and anyone else who wants to (seriously) bc i want to see everyone’s faves!!!!

s k i n c a r e

1. vanicream gentle facial cleanser for sensitive skin

$9-14 average

this face cleanser was like a miracle for me!!!! it’s really hard to find good facial cleansers for people with really dry and sensitive skin like mine due to eczema, but this one ticks all my boxes! it’s gentle, but still leaves my face feeling nice and clean!

2. cetaphil eczema restoraderm soothing moisturizer

$18-$25~

so this pretty pricey to me for a face moisturizer, but it is really is worth it. i was having the worst dry skin and eczema with flaky and dry skin on my face and after one night of using this i instantly saw results. so it’s definitely worth the money if you get eczema on your face!

3. chapstick total hydration soothing vanilla moisture

$ average around 7ish

a really good and solid chapstick. instantly made my lips feel sooo much better and kept them better! also good for small places on your face that are dry as well!

4. jasmine tea lip mask moisturizer

$12 on colourpop

Idk if this works or not. I bought it mainly for the packaging because it has uncle iroh on it. it’s really soft and feels good putting on though!!

m a k e u p

5. between the sheets super shock blush

$9 on colourpop

the best blush omggggg will never go back to powder !!!!! so soft and velvety !!! you just dab a little on your fingers and then tap tap tap and blend it onto your cheek wherever you want it!! can be super subtle or super prominent depending on how much you use. oof I love it so much

6. revolution golden bar eye shadow pallet

$6-$20~

my go to eye shadow pallet. like if you have green eyes these are some of the best daily colors for you!! i mainly use the three golds in the middle and the brown on the bottom for everyday looks

7. too faced triple scoop hyper-reflective highlighting pallet

$ i can’t find it new anywhere so i don’t think they sell it anymore :(

literally smells so good. all the colors look super good as well!! im pale (aka white) and even the brown highlighter is cute on me! great for matching highlighters with your outfits hehe

8. total temptation washable mascara

$8~

my favorite mascara ive tried. the brush is a perfect size, the application is great, and I love how it makes my lashes look!!!!

f r a n g r a n c e s

9. coach dreams sunset

$ averaging around 50 bucks, but the bigger the size the more $$

so i first got this in one of those little sample bottles you keep in your purse because I just could not help myself it smelled sooo gooodddd. and then my parents got me a big bottle for Christmas and I almost cried! I love this scent so much like I can’t even describe it tbh it’s just goodness~

[frogtanii]

hi! noah anon here again, um ahaha, i may have been inspired to write a part 2 to my previous atsumu hurt/comfort drabble, i hope that's okay! ive been living for protective!y/n ever since they fought meiko for suga, so i wanted to sort of portray that!

-

from the way atsumu's breathing had evened out, you assumed he'd finally fallen asleep. exhaustion from the rough night he had taking over as he laid in your bed, wrapped up in your comforting embrace. atsumu's forehead rested in the crook of your neck and his nose pressed up against your collarbone, soft breaths tickling the sensitive skin. his arm laid across your stomach, keeping you close. for the first time since he walked into your room that night, he looked peaceful.

you on the other hand, were pissed; still stewing with rage over the events of the night. the main target of your aggression being none other than miya osamu himself. how could someone be so cold to their own twin?

the more you thought about it, the more restless you got, a pit of frustration growing and twisting uncomfortably in your gut. laying still was starting to prove a difficult task. with all of this frustrated energy you just needed to move — do something, before you went insane. so as carefully as you could, you slipped out from under atsumu, gently pushing a pillow under him for support.

shutting your door as quietly as possible you padded your way into the kitchen to grab a glass of water and an aspirin for atsumu. he'd probably need it for when he woke up, and it was the perfect excuse to get up and move around. however, as you neared the kitchen, you noticed a figure searching through the snack cabinets, grey hairs poking out into your field of vision. of course now of all times you'd run into the object of your current frustration. did you universe hate you or something?

just ignore him, you thought to yourself, no sense in getting into a conflict tonight.

as quietly as possible, you pulled a glass cup from the cabinet and filled it up with water. you had asprin in your room, so there was no need to grab any from the common area. your next objective was to exit the kitchen as quick as possible before your urge to punch osamu in the face increased any more. at this moment, his mere presence was enough to up your anger levels.

however, the second you spun on your heels to leave, osamu was also making his way out of the kitchen, causing the two of you to almost collide. luckily osamu reacted quickly, stepping back and preventing anything from being spilt.

"fucking watch it!" he spit out, expression twisting into one of contempt.

you scoffed at his outburst, ready to hit him with a few choice words, but by the time your lips parted he was already storming out of the kitchen and into the living room. a high pitched voice could be heard when he entered, sending another wave of fury coursing through your veins. "thank you 'samu, you're the best!"

"of course baby," osamu responded, "now let's start our movie."

the noise of some cheesy romance movie soon filled the living room and all surrounding areas, way too loud for this late of an hour in your opinion. it only added to your irritation, and without even thinking you were marching yourself to the living room with conviction, glass of water left behind on the kitchen island.

usually you never sought out trouble, and you weren't too fond of confrontation when it could be avoided. in the beginning of your time in the hyper house, maybe, but as time passed you soon learned nothing you said would change anything. so to save some sanity you resorted to short quips and just plain ignoring your housemates, once your contract was up none of it mattered anymore anyway. but after holding atsumu for an hour while he sobbed, and osamu's entitled attitude, something in you snapped. fuck being the bigger person.

so with your shoulders back and head held high you stormed into the living room, snatching the remote from coffee table to pause the movie playing.

that certainly grabbed their attention.

"the fuck is yer problem?" osamu vetted, standing to square up to you, fists clenched at his side and jaw tense. meiko followed suit, but took her position slightly behind osamu, nimble fingers gripping his bicep.

"my problem? hmm let's see, maybe my problem is the fact that i just held your brother as he cried himself to sleep while you were out here cuddled up on the couch!"

meiko snickered from behind him, and you had to stop yourself from lunging at her. how dare she laugh at his pain?

"'tsumu's fine, he'll get over it. now leave so we can watch our movie." your eyes went wide at osamu's response. did he really not care?

"he's your brother, and you hurt him." the annoyed expression on osamu's face fell slightly at your statement, but he quickly recovered, expression morphing into one that could kill.  "don't act so innocent, you were probably in there twisting his mind with your little lies. you know everything that's happened between us has been your fault? you're the one that turned him against me!" his voice was gradually increasing him volume and malice, you obviously getting under his skin.

"oh please, you're still telling yourself that?" you inched closer to the pair, chin lifting up to meet osamu's steely glare, your attempt at intimidation working only on the small woman behind him.

"'samu, shes scaring me, please make her leave," meiko whimpered. Osamu placed a protective arm around her, pulling her into his side, "don't worry baby, i won't let her near you." you rolled your eyes at meiko, her feigned fear sending your patience over the edge.

"oh shut up, meiko," you snapped, causing her to coward further into osamu.  "hey, don't talk to her like that!" he shot back at you, eyes darkening as he towered over your form, but you refused to back down.

"i'm texting iwaizumi, he can make her leave." meiko began typing furiously on her phone.

you chose to ignore her, prioritizing getting in your final words before iwaizumi could come to their resuce. "you've got your head completely up your ass if you think anyone but yourself is to blame for your broken relationship with 'tsumu!"

"you have no right to—"

"what the hell is going on here?" iwaizumi stormed into the room, large arms crossed over his chest as he placed himself between you and your victims.

"iwa, thank god! me and 'samu were trying to watch a movie when y/n just came in here and started attacking us! it was so scary, please make her leave!"

you scoffed at meiko's fabricated story, but before you could even begin to defend yourself iwa spoke, "y/n, go back to your room before im forced to take action." despite his dagger sharp gaze, you refused to shrink. you were going to get your point in regardless of any threats iwaizumi threw your way. so shooting him a quick and dismissive glare, you turned your attention back to osamu and meiko to get in one final blow.

"look, i don't know what your problem with me is, and frankly i don't care. but leave atsumu the fuck out your sick little games." the venom in your voice was enough to strike real fear into meiko, who was now completely hiding behind osamu for protection. even osamu's intimidating demeanor faltered at your protectiveness over his brother.

iwaizumi was the first to break the tension, "y/n, go—"

"yeah yeah, i got it, im leaving." your cut him short, giving osamu one last glare before exiting the living room, stopping to grab the glass of water from the kitchen before heading back to your room.

in your frustration you'd completely forgotten atsumu was asleep, accidentally shutting your door back with a little too much force. "angel?" atsumu's sleep drenched voice pulled you from your stewing thoughts, and you felt any and all anger melt away when you locked eyes with him.

"where'd you go off to?" he asked, rubbing at his eyes and sitting up. you snatched a bottle of asprin from your night stand and extended it to him along with the glass of water, "figured you'd want this when you woke up."

the corner of his mouth lifted up into a lopsided smile as he accepted your offer, downing a pill and half the water in one go, "yer too good to me, angel."

you offered up a soft smile as you took the glass and pill bottle back from him and set them on your nightstand. you took a seat on your bed next to atsumu, pushing back his disheveled hair back with one hand, prompting him to let out a content hum.

"i'm sorry for waking you," you whispered, letting your hand trail down the side of his face before coming to rest against his jaw, "how are you feeling?"

atsumu leaned into your touch, "much better, thanks to you. but, can we lay down again?"

you nodded, falling back to a laying position with atsumu following suit. however, this time he pulled you into his chest, holding you in his arms. you sunk further into him, finding it much easier to sleep this time as his warmth surrounded you and calmed your nerves.

-

i got a little carried away and this ended up a little longer than i intended, oops, oh well! i hope you like it!

— noah anon

hhhh,,, BESTIE OMFG UR SO SO SO TALENTED WTF???? do u have a blog cs if so sharty drop the @ ahaha (jk only if u feel comfy!!) i just mean WOW WOW WOW WOWIE

[samwritesforyou]

We’re gonna be okay

Diego x reader

Summary: You and Diego worked out a system for a situation if he ever comes to your place while being in the highest form of distress and needs your help. He assured you it won’t happen often. Until one night, it finally did.

A/N: i feel like i’ve read the whole tumblr dot com worth of diego x reader fanfics and yet i still wanted more, so the desperate need to finally write something myself has been fulfilled. i would actually love to take requests, so if you want, dont hesitate to message/ask me! im ready to write fics and headcanons :) (my blog might seem new but ive been on tumblr for years and years and i finally dedicated a new blog to mostly reader inserts, either my own or reblogging others)

Warnings: Mentions of a panic attack, gender neutral reader

Wordcount: 3,350

There was a knock on the door.

It was pretty late, but not too late for it to be Diego yet.

Or so you thought.

You got up kinda lazily from a comfortable chair you had situated in the corner of a room, at first designed mainly for reading or napping, but ending up doing absolutely whatever you could on the spot. Eating pizza, watching netflix, browsing through the internet after long working hours that you put in into your tiny art selling business.

You slightly opened the door and already plastered a semi-fake smile for a possible neighbor, but in front of you stood Diego.

Your dear friend, who was at the moment soaked from the rain outside, with big eyes, fast breathing and bloody hands.

Bloody hands?!

“Hello to you too, friend!” you said quite worried, quickly patting him down for signs of any physical pain. For the first time in a while he seemed fine, unscarred.

Your eyes finally went up, literally scanning his face but it was completely unreadable.

His eyes were wide and he looked as if he couldn’t comprehend what was going on around him.

You looked down again and took his fists into your hands. His own palms unclenched and you could see that they were heavily bloodied.

“Diego.. whose blood is it?”

No answer.

You rushed him inside and closed the door behind the two of you, facing the damn vigilante again.

“Diego, I need to know who’s blood is on your hands,” your voice grew steadier as you knitted your brows together in worry and confusion.

Only then the guy decided to move his arms and you noticed how shaky he is. He connected his two index fingers in the form of a cross, pressing it to his chest.

Your own eyes went wide now as you stumbled back a few steps and your mind went blank.

.

.

.

You instantly remembered a night that happened a few years back. He has come in crumbling through your window and was obviously in some new form of distress, that you couldn’t quite understand yet.

“Diego?” it seemed like your voice didn’t reach his ears, so you tried calling out his name again, getting up from the couch and patting him lightly on the body, to determine any sign of an injury.

It looked like there was none, so you tried to reach his gaze that was somewhat absentminded, all over the place, scanning everything but not meeting your eyes.

He was a tough guy, and you knew it. You knew that if you want to get answers, you need to either get them yourself or make yourself heard, until he cannot ignore you any longer.

“Diego Hargreeves, what is going on?” your voice was soft yet determined.

His dark orbs finally stopped on your face and he just shook his head, his breathing oddly fast for a man who was just simply standing.

You continued to push. You didn’t have the best day either, and to be interrupted at 1am by his visit was nothing new, but you couldn’t let him have this behaviour. Even though you’re friends, that didn’t automatically mean that he could do whatever he wanted.

Throughout the whole night he didn’t say a thing, but when you started adding volume to your voice, he.. he just broke down.

That night, you’ve witnessed Diego experience a panic attack. Caused by yourself.

You couldn’t fall asleep that night, even after you eventually calmed him down and the only thing that was left to do for you was to watch him sleep and slowly rubbing circles on his exposed arm out of the blanket.

It felt like neons before you noticed a first ray of sunshine drawing from the half-closed curtains, making you spring to your feet and drag your ass to the kitchen, trying to think of what to do for breakfast.

When you figured the recipe out and finished cooking, Diego was already up and joined you near the kitchen counter, next to which you had two stools.

He settled on one of them, looking at you.

“Hey.”

“Hey,” you couldn’t muster anything better, so you just put a plate in front of him and then sat next to his side, simply digging into your portion of scrambled eggs.

“About last night, y/n..” he drifted off, probably at first deciding that it’s better to fill his stomach a little bit.

In the meantime you didn’t dare to speak up and just waited for him to say something, anything.

When he finished his meal, he finally turned to you with a sigh.

“You know that one guy I told you ‘bout? That we.. we do some vigilante shit together from time to time?”

You just nodded, not meeting his eyes.

“Well. I guess I could count him as a close friend. You know.. and,” this was followed by a slight pause and clearing of the throat.

“He died yesterday. I couldn’t save him.”

Your eyes immediately shot up to Diego and all that vulnerability and hurt that you’ve clearly seen yesterday just overtaking him were completely gone. Now present only a strong facade that he mastered whenever he needed to hide from showing emotions. You hated it.

“Shit, Diego..” you spoke quietly and softly, all the words seemed to have left you in all the things unsaid in your throat. But you tried to continue.

“I’m sorry. And I’m also sorry for pushing you over the edge. I.. I didn’t know what happened so I just acted how we would normally do,” he smirked at that, merely for a second, but you still caught it.

“Look, I.. I know, “ he simply said and then it felt as if he was weighting pros and cons of telling you something else that was clearly on his chest.

“You always help me out. Every single night I come to you.. Why do you do it, y/n?” Diego’s eyes were steadily turned your way.

At the sudden question you raised an eyebrow, “well, I.. I care about you.”

He lightly bit his lower lip and turned his gaze away, clearly thinking about something really hard.

“Okay,” he finally said, “y/n, do you think I could ask you for a favour then?”

At that your eyes met and you felt nervous, for some reason.

You really liked him. Not just like a friend. But you understood that there probably won’t be a chance for you two to ever become a couple (mostly considering that you didn’t believe that he could feel about you this way), so you settled for friendship anyways, since you two really got along well.

And having this handsome tough guy as a friend? Damn, just that is already some kind of luck swinging your way.

But your feelings of course meant that.. you’d do more for him than what you’d do just for a friend. You would get out of your comfort zone just to help him with injuries or hear him talk about his girlfriend (at the time, now they were broken up) and how they argued so much that he ended up on the streets and didn’t really want to go to his lonely place at the gym.

And you took him in. You always did. And since the day you became friends you always care for him.

And you’d care now once again.

“What is it?” in your tone danced a question, troubled with what he might ask for.

“Well, yesterday-“ he cut himself from finishing and cleared his throat, starting over.

“I imagine we’re gonna be friends for a long time, right?”

You just pushed your brows up with a small nod in affirmation.

“I never had.. anyone, really, to help me with the states I often got into,” you immediately thought of Eudora, wasn’t his ex-girlfriend supposed to be his support pillar? Or is he just making you feel sorry for him-

“Or I didn’t ever trust anyone that much, you know,” oh, okay, that kind of explains that then.

“And I guess.. I trust you enough? To share this?” he talked quietly and mumbled a lot so you realised soon you won’t be able to hear him at all.

You grabbed his hands with yours and caught his attention this way.

You were never really touchy together, but occasional hugs and even holding hands was kind of a standard for you from time to time.

His eyes met yours again and you cursed yourself for your heartbeat getting faster. This is not an appropriate moment to get butterflies in your stomach, dammit.

“I’m listening, Diego,” you confirmed, nodding again.

“Okay. It’s- it’s just really h-hard to talk about this,” he stuttered a bit, but with the next breath continued again, “When there’s some situation that’s just completely fucked up, like losing someone close to me, or- or somethin’ else, I don’t know.. I finish what I need at the scene where it happened but when I come home I just,” he breathed some air in and you felt his hands squeeze yours a bit tighter, “I just break down, you know? Sometimes it’s just all too much for me and I don’t know how to deal with it and I would just wanna.. someone to hold me, I guess? Otherwise when someone’s trying to talk at me or somethin’ I just get even more worked up and it’s even worse.”

It all started to come together in your mind. Even though it sounded really strange to hear Diego talk about things like.. wanting to be held and shit. But you always guessed there’s a far bigger sweetheart and a soft boy underneath all those harness and knives.

You tried to pick your words carefully.

“So when I started to ask you shit.. You just flipped. Basically because I was talking at you a lot and you couldn’t take it anymore, right?”

He sighed and looked somewhere up, nodding bit by bit.

“Yeah, yep. That was it.”

You clapped at his hands lightly, to bring his focus back again and he looked at you and mustered a sad, faint smile.

You did the same. In the world you lived in, unforeseen and unfortunate events were happening left and right and thinking about his childhood and everything.. no wonders he developed such a huge reaction and coping mechanism to something catastrophic happening.

“That’s okay, Diego. I’m here for you, I mean it. Let’s just talk about some things what I should and shouldn’t do when you come here in that state, alright? I just want you to feel comfortable.”

“Alright. Thank you, y/n,” he was looking down now, the whole morning kinda failing to meet your gaze and just rubbed his thumb across your hand, which send you heart into a race again.

You slowly let go of him, making an excuse to go wash the dishes.

After a while you looked behind you where he sat and said, “We also need some sort of a sign that you can easily show me, since you’re not really talkative when you get like this.”

Apparently he already used said “sign” somewhere, because he had it on the ready.

It was his hands clutching in fists, index fingers crossing each other in a form of a cross, pressed to his chest.

“Something like this. But don’t worry, I don’t think it’ll happen often. That would be really sad,” he laughed a little and then looked at you somewhat longingly and you averted your eyes back to the sink, nodding.

.

.

You almost forgot about that and now it all come flooding back.

Something terrible must’ve happened. You were panicking, but you had to stay strong, for him.

He was still standing in your hallway, with a crossed index fingers pressed to his chest.

“Okay, okay..” you mumbled more to yourself than to him, taking his hands into yours and looking him up and down.

He really seemed.. disconnected. It was kind of scary and you tried so hard not to think about what happened. Or about who died.

“Here, come with me, Diego,” you led him by the hand towards your couch as he was holding onto you, but his usual grip was gone.

You both ended up on a sofa and you really didn’t know how to act around him now, because.. he didn’t talk, didn’t look at you but when he did, his eyes were wide and big and he just seemed suddenly like a small boy to you.

Hopefully he won’t remember this tomorrow, you thought and tried to smile a little bit at him.

“Okay. Can you get your hands up for me, baby boy?” You’ve decided to approach this situation as if you were just babysitting an overgrown child.

Because nothing bad happens to children normally, right? And if you kept thinking about him as usual grown man Diego, you’d lose your mind in the process, wanting to scream and shake him by the shoulders until he spills you what happened.

Being Diego’s friend pushed you to new limits each day, truly.

He didn’t bat an eyelid at your tone change and word choosing, just obliging and putting his hands up.

You helped him to get his knives down and put his black turtleneck over his head, so now he sat shirtless right next to you, hands still smeared with blood.

Goddamit the blood!

You took him by the elbows and lead Diego to the bathroom, where you helped to get the red out of his hands. At the sight of blood dripping down into the sink you deciphered a whimper from him, even through the sound of running water and looked up.

Diego couldn’t stop looking down at his hands and tears were running down his cheeks.

You quickly took his face into your wet hands from the water and forced him to look away and lock his gaze with yours.

“Hey, don’t look at it, okay? It’ll only make you stressed. Until I’m done you can just close you eyes, okay?”

“Oh-okay,” he said and just closed his eyes here and there.

You sighed and tried to finish washing his hands as fast as possible, cursing under your breath pretty often.

“I’m sorry..” you heard him mumble and when you looked up, his eyes were still shut.

“Nothin’ to be sorry about.. We’ll talk about this tomorrow, right? Don’t worry. You’re safe now,” you smiled as you were already wrapping his hands in a towel and his eyelashes fluttered, eyes opening.

You stayed looking at each other for a second longer than necessary, but then you already lead him away to the bedroom area, where you actually tucked him in, wrapping in a soft blanket and then rushed to the kitchen, grabbing a few cookies and then leaving it on a plate next to him on the night table. 

 You almost made yourself comfortable on the couch, when he suddenly called out your name from the bed.

You sprung to your feet, thinking he’s actually hurt but you didn’t notice or that- “Can you... stay with me? P-please?” he asked, disrupting your train of thought. You did expect this, but still felt really shy about that.

Diego is vulnerable right now and does need your help and presence though.

And there wouldn’t be anything you wouldn’t do for him.

“Sure,” and after this simple answer you carefully climbed in next to him covering you both with a blanket and he curled up closer to you, almost immediately falling asleep.

From one point of view it felt like you wouldn’t sleep at all tonight, but from the other one.. you actually fell asleep just as fast as he did.

.

.

To nobody’s surprise you woke up first and actually flinched at the sight of sleeping Diego inches from your own face.

Your mind went running with ideas what happened and what’s going on until you realised the real deal and your brain caught up to yesterday’s shenanigans.

It was a wild ride and you were thankful that now it’s - most probably - over.

Your eyes were subconsciously scanning his face, until you realised what you’re doing, but you didn’t stop even then.

You’ve never been this close to his face yet and now you could admire and explore every part of it.

Having feelings for a friend that’s laying in the same bed with you at the moment is really not the healthiest thing that could’ve happened to you, huh..

You actually froze and your heart started racing billion times faster when you realised that you have a weight of his arm around your waist, pulling you closer from his sleep.

He grunted and his nose was now in your hair, shuffling a little to get more comfortable.

You had no idea how to change positions, especially when being held by such a strong arm as his and you got a feeling like Diego might actually wake up just about now, so the best solution that came into your mind was to forcefully close your eyes shut and pretend that you’re still sleeping.

He did, indeed, wake up. You were suddenly pushed to the other side of the bed, arm disappearing from your waist and a waterfall of curses fell from his lips quietly.

You used up all your acting stamina to make a believable scene of you gaining your conscious from the deep slumber that you were obviously in, stretched your arms for a good effect and finally opened your eyes.

You immediately signed up for a staring contest as soon as you looked at him and smiled a little. His face remained unreadable but perhaps a little bit flustered?.. But you may be reading too much into it.

“Hi,” you said with a higher tone than intended and Diego just nodded at that.

You tried your luck by addressing the elephant in the room right away, you never liked ignoring the problems that were always looming over you, “care to tell me what happened yesterday?”

He drew a big sigh and rested his head back on the pillow, looking up at the ceiling.

You couldn’t stop looking at him. At first because you really wanted to know the mystery, but the longer you looked at him, the more you realised that you’re just admiring the beauty that he holds, until his words fell like a dead weight right onto your shoulders.

“I found Eudora’s body yesterday. I couldn’t get to the place in time and someone killed her.”

What?

It felt like what he said was simply a trick of your imagination. You liked Eudora yourself, she was a very intelligent and an interesting person, you two often hung out and that feeling didn’t cease even after you found out that she and Diego started dating.

And even when they broke up some months after, you still found your way to spend time with her. So did Diego.

You wanted to cry, but thought that it might be insensitive towards him, because he was much closer to her than you were, so you tried to swallow your forming tears down.

“I’m.. I’m so sorry, Diego..”

“It’s your loss too, I know it, y/n,” he looked at you with much softer look this time.

“Come here,” he said a little bit hesitantly and opened up one arm towards you.

This was unusual, but maybe last night’s events tore down some walls?.. Who knows.

You almost threw yourself into his embrace and once your forehead rested on his chest, you started crying.

From everything, honestly. There’s been problems at work, your seemingly unrequited feelings for Diego didn’t help much either and now you learned that you lost one of your friends.

He started rubbing circles on your back, just letting you get those emotions out, while you two were hugging each other on the bed in your apartment.

And as you slowly started to calm down, he said a gentle, “it’s gonna be okay. We’re gonna be okay”

[happytsukki]

common sense

k. tsukishima

you were a fool. but only for tsukishima. (f! reader)

a/n: ive been reading the manga and chapters 370+ literally have me bawling, im so emotionally attached. also fun fact you cant get your drivers license in japan till you graduate high school,,big rip for (y/n) and her food.

someone with common sense would’ve ran home to avoid the predicted forecast. they would’ve enjoyed safely arriving home without getting a single drop of rain on their uniform. but you lacked common sense.

the steady beat of raindrops hitting the ground accompanied by a strong gust of wind greeted you as you exited the school. you stood waiting, a bright green umbrella painted with purple triceratops in one hand while you rocked back and forth on your heels.

“what are you still doing here?” a voice suddenly asked, snapping you out of your trance. looking up you locked eyes with tsukishima causing a champagne pink hue to creep onto your cheeks.

“oh, i-uh, knew you didn’t have an umbrella, so i figured i would wait for you and we could walk together,” you beamed. tsukishima rolled his eyes and adjusted his glasses, but you swore you could see the corners of his lips curl up.

you knew tsukishima. you knew he hated the rain and deep down, he appreciated your kind gesture even if he didn’t say it.

he grabbed the umbrella in your hand and opened it outside the safety of the building. he took two steps into the rain before turning around to realize you were still frozen on the steps of karasuno high. there you were, an idiot shivering from head to toe in the cold weather, yet you still had a smile painted across your face.

“are you gonna just stand there or are you actually coming?” he muttered, his eyebrows furrowing in slight confusion.

“coming!!” you cooed before running down the steps and practicing colliding with him as you pressed closer to him under the tiny umbrella. maybe you should’ve packed a bigger umbrella, but you definitely weren’t complaining.

you walked in unison, small drops falling onto your sweater as you could barely fit under the umbrella with the beanpole. you took notice of one hand tucked away in the warmth of his jacket and the other clutching the umbrella for the two of you. and with your warm gloves, you placed a hand over his.

“sorry, your hand seemed a little cold” you blurted out, slightly afraid he would take his hand away in disgust. but he didn’t, he let you hold his hand. you could finally release the breath you were holding and smiled. rainy days never felt good. the sky may have been dark and gloomy, but being with him felt as if it was another spring day, the sun beaming brightly and the birds chirping.

your walk consisted of asking tsukishima about his volleyball club season and him asking about your classes. you wanted to amuse him, to hear his laugh just once, so you told him the story of how you went to school thinking you math test only to find it was actually an english test, receiving a grade no higher than your age.

and miraculously, he laughed. it was subtle and quiet, but it took away your breath and made your heart race.

tsukishima halted, finally arriving at his home. he glanced up at the sky before catching it slowly transform from a color to a baby blue.

“it stopped raining—“ you cut him off midsentence, grabbing the sides of his face and pulling him closer before you placed a quick peck on his lips.

“bye!” you shouted as you ran away. leaving poor tsukishima standing there, dumbfounded as to why his heart was beating so fast and why his knees turned into complete jelly.

you liked tsukishima. and luckily, he liked you too.

someone with common sense would’ve finished their homework and took advantage of a night free of worry. they would’ve enjoyed a full eight hours of sleep while dreams danced through their mind. but you lacked common sense.

the kitchen clock read 2:18, you were growing impatient waiting for cookies in the oven. before your crazy attempt to make lunches and treats for the entire karasuno team, you studied for your history test and finished a 10-page essay due the next day.

with your apron stained with all sorts of condiments and food, you glanced at the pile of bento boxes placed on your dining table. each decorated with a name of every player on karasuno’s mens volleyball club, of course including the cutest managers and best coaches.

the lunch box on top, reading my tsukki, my moon made with extra love and care for you boyfriend.

tomorrow was the miyagi prefectural qualifiers and as much as you wanted to be there, you had school. you longed to be in the crowds, screaming for tsukki and karasuno at the top of your lungs. so of course, you felt guilty for not being able to give your support. an alternative? food.

beep beep. the timer of the oven finally went off and you breathed a sigh of relief. you weren’t sure how long you could keep your eyelids open. your tiredness must’ve gotten to your head because without a second thought you opened the oven and reached for the scorching pan.

you spewed a variety of curses quietly in an attempt to not wake your parents, but the pain was intolerable. after taking the cookies out with the opposite hand, throwing them in a container and trying to type out ‘how to deal with burns’ with your pinky while one hand held ice (not a good idea) to the burn— you fell asleep on the couch.

not even 3 hours later, you woke up. oh the things i do for this boy. you shook your head, a smile creeping onto your face just thinking about him. you quickly throw on a hoodie and carefully place the food into a basket attached to your bike.

the sun had barely come up, just peeking from the horizon. it was way too early. riding your bike to karasuno while you rubbed your eyes constantly and yawned nonstop was a challenge. you almost tipped over several times. but once you arrived you were greeted by a horde of “hey it’s y/n!!” but the only thing you could really hear was “y/n what are you doing here?”

“well, good morning to you too, tsukki,” you chirped, taking the food out of your basket and carefully distributing it to everyone.

“wow y/n, you really didn’t have to do this.” daichi said. “but this does look amazing.” sugawara butt in, admiring the cute design. “y/n you’re the best, seriously!!” praised hinata, already shoving a small bite into his mouth for a quick ‘taste.’

when you handed tsukki his, confusion and worry came across his face. “but— look at you y/n. you look terrible.” he spat, reaching over to inspect your face. he titled your chin up and pulled your eyes wide.

“is that what you tell your girlfriend after she spent all night to make you lunch?” you pouted, slightly hurt from how he reacted.

“i think y/n looks pretty, like always.” yamaguchi gushed from afar.

“shut up yamaguchi.” “sorry tsukki!!”

“but you know thats not what i meant. i’m just worried about, you look like you haven’t sleep at all.” he shook his head.

“hey! technically i slept for 3 hours.” you argued, earning a signature tsukishima eye roll from the man himself.

“you’re an idiot, y/n. but thank you.” he muttered and placed a kiss on your forehead. suddenly, coach ukai cut in and yelled for everyone to get in the van. groaning, tsukki squeezed you into a hug.

“sorry i can’t be there, but win for me and i’ll be there next match. i promise” you pouted, adding an extra boost of encouragement for tsukishima. these days, you’d noticed how passionate he’d become about the sport and no words could describe your happiness over this.

after waving bye to the team and wishing them the best of luck, you stood alone in the parking lot. happy and excited for what was to come for the karasuno boys volleyball club. but stupid for thinking you could make it through the rest of your day on the mere 3 hours of sleep.

you were an idiot— a fool, perhaps.

someone might as well hand you a jester hat and shoes, bells included, of course. because you were a fool, for tsukishima kei only.

someone with common sense would’ve followed the sign saying “only players allowed on court.” they would’ve yelled praises of encouragement from the stands and just sent a text. but you lacked common sense.

as soon as you saw red liquid ooze from tsukishima’s hand, you hoped out of your seat and grabbed your belongings without hesitation. oh no. your heart sunk and before yachi could even try to calm you down you were already running.

past the crowds and down the stairs leading to the court. you sprinted towards the karasuno team, completely ignoring the officials yelling at you.

you gently pushed through tsukishima’s teammates and an angry expression reached your face once you met eyes with the boy.

“tsukishima kei, are you stupid?” you cursued at him. his face turns a slight pink as his teammates snicker at your typical girlfriend antics. meanwhile, several tournament officials walked over to check on tsukishima’s condition and kick you off the court since you weren’t a player. but you didn’t care. you took his hurt hand into yours, putting your face closer to examine the extent of his injury.

he winced in pain causing your anger to melt away. “you almost gave me a heart attack, you have no idea how worried i was up th-“ you blab on before tsukishima reassures you.

“y/n i’m still breathing, right? you care about me that much huh?” tsukishima smirked as he tried to hide the pain he felt in his right hand.

“okay lovebirds, why don’t you go to the medical office together and get it checked out? we’re going to need you back on the court, tsukishima.” coach ukai quickly sends the two of you away in hopes of him returning by the fifth set.

akiteru and yachi anxiously follow as you and tsukishima rush to the medical office. they wait outside and the doctor tells you two that only his pinky is discolated and the rest of his fingers are fine, so he can still return but he has to wait for the bleeding to stop. the doctor excuses himself to get more bandages, leaving the two of you alone.

you stand up from your seat to stand in front of tsukishima. his face is serious, clearly still fixated on the game still going on at the moment. you wanted to give him peace but you couldn’t hold in how proud you were.

you go on to explain how amazed you were. “and when you jumped up to block, i knew ushijima had no chance— then BOOM! his spike goes straight down into the floor. i think i broke yachi’s eardums with my screaming. not to mention how hot you looked out there like what the hell??” you gushed, making tsukishima smile amidst his pain.

he pulled you in closer and wrapped his long arms around your torso, tucking his face into the comfort of your neck. like muscle memory, your hand finds its way to his back and began to rub circles.

“you’re really sweaty, tsukki. its kinda gross.” you whisper into his hear making him click his tongue in response. but despite the perspiration dripping down his back, you honestly didn’t mind.

tsukishima pulls away, his eyes wander around your face. his breath hitching at your every feature, especially at how your eyes possessed a unique twinkle that didn’t just resemble stars but the entire galaxy. then he remembers the day he fell in love with you, that day you walked home together in the rain.

“god y/n, you’re crazy you know that, right? but i love you.” he chuckles. “i know.” you proudly state while you try to hide the fact that your heart was physically hurting from how fast it was beating. “and i-“ you sprinkle a dozen kisses all over tsukishima’s face. one for eveything you loved about him.” love you too, kei” you say before pressing your swollen lips against his.

“now go out there and beat shiratorizawa’s ass!”

and that’s exactly what he does.

[honestlyimstilllivinginthe90s]

Golden |Drew Soulmate AU| Two|

A/n lowkey ngl im like really proud of this chapter. i really hope y’all like it. also idk if i wanna write a smutty chapter for the next part. i’d love to hear your opinion on if i should or not because ive never written smut before so itd probably be trash so...... whatcha think?

Warning: Swearing, kinda fast paced (wish it was slow burn but i dont have the attention span for that), mentions of vomit (at the end)

Word Count: Approx 1.9 k

APRIL 22ND 2020 12:32PM

“I’m going to shit myself.” Y/n said, moving the same strand of hair out of her face.

“Well that’s a really cute dress, you better fucking not.” Naya tutted from her position leaning against her bedroom wall.

“Okay. I’ve got this, right?”

“Yes! Now go get yo man! He’s still outside waiting for you.”

Y/n smiled at her reflection and let Naya drag her out into the hall. Naya walked over to the door and looked out the peephole.

“You didn’t tell me that he was that hot.”

Y/n pushed her out of the way to look through the peephole. Drew was leaning against a street pole and damn did he look good.

“Go get him girly.”

Y/n opened the door, Drew standing up straight at the sound of the door being opened. Drew’s heart stopped. She looked gorgeous and damn red was definitely her colour.

“Wow, you look, wow, you’re gorgeous.” Drew smiled as Y/n did a little twirl in response.

Y/n giggled and linked her arm through his. They walked down the street together to a small coffee shop that Drew said sold “chocolate chip cookies so good you’ll never be able to eat another cookie again”.

“The outside of your apartment looks nice.” Drew teased as they rounded the corner together.

Y/n blushed, sputtering out an apology. Naya hated having guests in their apartment even if it was for a few minutes.

“You’re cute when you blush.” Drew smiled down at Y/n, his hair flopping down against his forehead.

“You’re cute.” Y/n stated, spinning around so she was facing him while she walked backwards in front of Drew.

Drew reached out and took Y/n’s hands in his to make sure she wouldn’t fall over. Y/n’s skin tingled as their fingers interlocked. Damn, she could get used to this.

“Am I now?” Drew chewed on his lower lip as a rosy blush grew across his cheekbones. Drew chewing on his bottom lip when he got complimented made Y/n wanna compliment him for the rest of eternity.

“I suppose.” Y/n shrugged.

Drew gently tugged Y/n’s hands in protest, laughing along with her.

"How long have you been living in LA?" Drew asked, still holding Y/n’s hand.

"About a year or so. Naya, my roommate, we went to high school together and we were best friends. She wants to sing and well her dream brought us here."

"What about you?" Drew asked, tilting his head to look at her.

"What about me?"

"You told me why Naya's here, why are you here?"

"I wanna write. Or paint. I don't really know. Naya knew what she wanted, I'm just along for the ride." She shook her head in embarrassment. "What are you doing here?"

Drew smiled. "I'm an actor. I moved here from North Carolina to find my big break." Drew chuckled.

“Have you found it yet?” Y/n looked up at him as Drew stopped outside the coffee shop. It was a small building on the corner of the street, with window boxes filled with artificial blue carnations.

“I don’t know.” Drew smiled a sad smile before reaching forward and opening the door to the coffee shop, the smell of freshly baked cookies hitting Y/n instantly. Although the place was small, the inside felt bigger than it actually was. There were an elderly couple sitting in the corner beside the door and a young woman sat in the far corner working on a laptop with a forgotten cup of coffee beside her.

“This place is beautiful.” Y/n sighed in pleasure, Drew grinning as he took her hand and pulled her over to a table in the left hand corner beside a small window. Drew pulled out Y/n’s chair for her, she laughed.

“And who said chivalry is dead?” Drew sat down across from her, trying to focus so much on how beautiful she looked when she laughed.

“It’s easy to be chivalrous when it comes to you.” Drew shrugged, looking down at the table trying to ignore the rising blush on his cheeks. He had never felt like this about anyone before, they barely knew each other but already he craved to be closer to her. He needed to know everything about her, he needed to touch every inch of her skin, he needed her like an alcoholic needed a shot of whiskey. And with every passing second it just got worse. He was addicted. And so was she.

APRIL 22ND 2020 2:56PM

They walked out of the café, giggling and talking about everything and nothing at all. All they knew was that this date couldn’t end, not yet anyway.

“Wanna go to the beach? My car is parked around the corner.” Drew asked standing in front of Y/n, basking in her presence, their fingers still interlocked.

Y/n couldn't agree fast enough. Drew’s car was parked just a few feet down the street from the coffee shop, “I might have gone in before our date to ask them to save that table for us.”

Y/n climbed into the passenger seat and Drew drove them to the beach. Y/n reached over intertwining her pinky finger in his as he drove.

She stared out the window, hypnotised by the passing trees. Drew sneaked glances at her, hypnotised by Y/n.

From the Dining Table softly played in the background of their moment. Y/n basking in the presence of her soulmate, Drew basking in the presence of a girl he wished to know. So far from each other despite their interlocked pinky fingers all because of a bond meant to bring them together.

APRIL 22ND 2020 5:57PM

“You’re so golden.” Y/n muttered at Drew as she ran her fingers through his hair. They lay beside each other on an old ratty blanket Drew found in the trunk of his car. Drew’s hands were placed firmly on her waist, rubbing small circles on her still slightly damp skin from when he chased her along the shore.

Drew stared longingly at her lips, trying to tear his gaze away. He was not one to kiss on the first date and the last thing he wanted was to scare her off.

“Am I now?” Drew teased, tugging on his bottom lip with his teeth.

Without thinking Y/n reached out and removed his lip from between his teeth. Him chewing his bottom lip did unholy things to her.

Drew swallowed as Y/n kept her thumb on his lip, carefully rubbing it before moving her hand to rest on his jaw.

Drew’s voice was hoarse, sending shivers down her spine as he said, “I really fucking want to kiss you right now.”

Y/n licked her lips, as Drew’s hand made their way to rest on her hips. “Please,” she whispered, taking in shallow breaths, “kiss me.”

Drew pulled her into him as he pressed his lips to hers, her hands instantly found their place in his hair. The kiss was slow and soft, all movements gentle and cautious despite the hunger in both of their chests.

Drew slowly pulled away, resting his forehead against Y/n’s as the both tried to collect their breaths. It was pointless as the more they tried to catch their breath, all they could smell was each other and before they knew it their lips were crashing back together.

This was needier but slow and sensual. Drew lay on his back, pulling Y/n on top of him to straddle his waist.

One of her hands was under his chin, ensuring that his lips never left hers. Drew’s hands were on the small of her back until one slowly crept up to her hair and the other under her jacket, pressing her even closer to his chest.

Drew slowly pulled away, taking Y/n’s bottom lip in between his teeth, drawing a moan from her as she devoured his lips again.

The connection between them, their soulmate connection, tugged at Y/n until they separated, Drew held her close to his chest. As he told her a story about his time in college, Y/n couldn’t ignore the fear that he’d never realise they were soulmates. Remembering the address that Naya wrote in her phone, Y/n swallowed her fear and enjoyed this moment with Drew.

APRIL 25TH 2020 1:28PM

“Mrs Lopez, I’m Y/n L/n, I’m Naya’s best friend. I need your help.” Y/n stood on the steps outside of a two storey house with vines growing on the walls and an arch of flowers over the front gate.

An elderly woman of average height opened the door, she had dark skin which was wrinkled with age although she held a youthful aura about her.

“Of course, soulmate problems eh? Come on in Chiquita.”

Y/n walked into her house, silently wondering how she knew that she had soulmate problems. Mrs Lopez led her into a small room at the front of the house that smelt of incense. Mrs Lopez gestured to Y/n to sit down at a small table as she took a seat across from her.

“What’s wrong, honey?”

“I, well I, I think I found my soulmate.” Y/n stuttered, she felt foolish but she was desperate.

“Bonita that’s wonderful. What’s worrying you?” Mrs Lopez reached over and took Y/n hands in hers.

“He doesn’t know. He has no clue we’re soulmates and it’s killing me.” Y/n groaned, the pain in her chest returning.

“Oh you poor thing. That is unusual.” Mrs Lopez clicked her tongue, she released Y/n’s hands and poured her cup of hot chamomile tea.

“Are you sure that he’s yours? Sometimes emotions can cloud our spiritual judgements.”

“Yes. I know. He’s just, I know Mrs Lopez.” Mrs Lopez smiled a sad smile when her nose scrunched up suddenly.

“What age is he? When’s his birthday?”

“Em, November fourth, I believe. He’ll be turning 27.”

“Oh Amor.” Mrs Lopez shook her head as she stood up and started rummaging in her drawers.

“What? What’s wrong?” Y/n sat up, watching as Mrs Lopez walked around the room with surprising grace for her age.

Mrs Lopez didn’t respond as she walked back over to Y/n, a small bottle in her hand.

“We have the same soulmate through every lifetime. We may have different bodies, but the soul remembers. Something must have happened to him in his past life that is blocking him from remembering you in this life. You need to get him to remember what happened.” Mrs Lopez handed Y/n the bottle, “A few drops of this in a drink or in food until the memory returns should do the trick. It should take about three months to work. It’s just a herbal remedy, so it’s perfectly safe.”

Y/n held the bottle in her hands, she could solve this.

“Sometimes, the universe is wrong. Make sure you actually want this, you have the choice to choose if you want him to remember you. Some people don’t get that luxury.” Mrs Lopez sounded like she spoke from experience.

“But what did you need to know his birthday for?” Y/n watched as Mrs Lopez’s face fell in melancholy.

“Have you ever heard of the 27 club?”

“You mean the conspiracy about a bunch of celebrities dying at 27?” Y/n chuckled in confusion.

“There’s a reason. Soulmates are precious and rare so you only have so long to form the bond with them.” Y/n felt sick, “You have until their 27th birthday. But sometimes we run out of time and sometimes people can’t handle it.”

“Why? What happens if I can’t get Drew to remember me before his 27th birthday?”

“Amor,”

“Please. Mrs Lopez tell me.”

“You’ll forget. Both of you will forget that you ever met each other and every memory you have together, will leave you. You’ll only be left with a feeling that something is missing.”

Now Y/n was going to be sick.

Taglist: @butterfliesinthenightsky @netflix-imagines @copper-boom @starrystarkey93 @drew-starkey @maybanksbaby @poguequeen @prejudic3 @nxsmss @ilovejjmaybank

AHH!! did you like it??? i really hope you enjoyed. thank you so much for reading and feedback is VERY appreciated!! thank you and stay safe!

[randomsevans]

Pain of being in love part 3

Original apart of @jtargaryen18 #30daysofchris2020

Two weeks had dragged by as you felt like an empty shell going day by day . You hadn't spoken to anyone apart form Scott ,you haven't left the house unless it was for a good reason. You would constantly forget to eat so Scott became like your own personal chief.

And all this because the time had finally arrived where your love for chris was outshone by his own love for someone else .

Scott had told you that Lisa and Minka have been planning a engagement party much to chris dislike as he sees the announcement as an engagement party .

Chris had tried to call you but you always let it go to voice mail as it was probably an invitation to the party next Saturday. You really didnt want to go . The pain in your heart was begaing you not to as it cant take anymore hurt . But you knew as being the brothers best friend and a family friend you need to go . Because as much as it hurt you . You know that this will make Chris happy and you need to be happy for him even tho you are dying inside .

++++++++++++

It was the day before the party so the Friday and some how Scott had managed to get you out of your bed and house only to be in his house on his couch . Currently eating too much mint chocolate chip ice cream along with this stuiped movie Scott forced you to watch

Love Rosie .

"How fuckin ironic "

You knew that Scott put picked this movie on purpose . Whether it was for the both of you to make fun or the movie like you usual do or let you watch it because it was so fuckin relatable. Either way you too had ended up watching the movie in silence with a few mumbles about food or if one was getting up or not and even a giggle or two when Rosie was struggling with a new born .

It had got to the part of the wedding and oh by god how you related to it . Rosie speech on how she loves him no matter where he is or who hes with .. your heart was yelling someone gets it . You were stuck in your own your head focusing on Rosie words until Scott spoke up.

"How ?" He ask

"What ? " you were confused and faced him as he faced you turning his body as the movie played in the back ground .

"How , when, why ?" He stared directly into your eyes with the soft blue shade he shares with his brother

"What ? " you asked again

"When did you begin to have feeling for my brother and why ... and how much because not to be mean but iv never seen you like this not ever so his engagement clear has affected you " he said softly

You hadn't yet actually spoken the words I love your brother to Scott or I'm in love with him to be more exact but Scott had guest it never asked about it until now .

You were silent for a moment thinking ... well more like your head was empty of thoughts you just liked the silence.

"Who said I have feeling.... "

"Y/n " Scott cut you off

You shift in your seat turning to face Scott legs cross over each other and hands in your lap looking down .

"I .. I had always had a crush on him you know ... who didnt " scott hummed in agreement

"But do you remember that day when I...was ment to have my first date but he never showed up "

Once again Scott hummed

"Well Chris picked me up... and he tried cheering me up .. and it worked "

You glanced up a Scott who looked softly at you as your eyes hot glassy . You looked back down to your hands as there stared nervously fiddling with the ends of the blanket that was wrapped around you.

"Well we were at a dinner ... and do you know in movies it like you have loved someone and you always new . Well it wasnt like that ... "

You took a deep breath.

"I hit me .. like a truck ... he was sitting at the other side of the table... and it hit me everything flooded I... love him but not just that . Because I love you ."

That caused Scott to scoffed as if ' I know you do who doesnt '

"It was more ... well more like a different type of love ... or more like . I was in love in love with him ."

You glance up at the ceiling letting the tears sink back into your eyes as you shake your head .

"I AM in love with him "

You looked at Scott who now had tears in his eyes ..and red showing he was trying to hold them back .

"And I think I always will . "

You were both silent for a seconde

"No matter where he is ... or who hes with a will always love him "

That caused you both to giggle as you made your way into Scotts open arms

"Quoting are we " he chuckled as your head landed on his chest as his arms wrapped around you .

"Well you know me "

You heard him sniff as you felt a tear drop into your hair .

"Oh .. god ... how have you kept it in for so long... that was like ... .... we were 14 or 15 fuck how ? Why ?" He said softly as tears clouded his voice .

"I didnt say anything or do anything because he will never and has never felt the same I'm... im like a sister to him ...in a weird way... and I'd never deserve him ....."

You left your head and looked at Scott .

"And at the same time I realised iam in love with him I also knew nothing would become of it because... " tears bow fell down your eyes .

"Because it was better to have both of you in my life then not to have neither of you ... and I wasnt willing to risk it ..... and I knew ... I knew this time would come .... but it dosnt stop .... it doesn't stop it hurting " you couldn't help but let it all out as you tucked your self back into Scott

He placed a kiss in your hair

"Your a silly one ain't ya ..... I will always be here you know that " he said softly

"You do know that right ?"

You just nodded as your tears drained his shirt .

++++++++++

You stood at Lisa front door with Scott by your side much like that dreaded day three weeks ago . You were in a blue floral dress in small pumps waiting patiently as you heard the party already up and ready with in .

"Its not late to turn back " Scott whisper in your ear just before the door swang open. To reveal Minka at the door with a giant smile and an even bigger diamond on her left hand . That had somehow made your heat beat pain through out your veins.

"It is now " you whisper back before putting a wide fake smile on

"Minka .... contagralations " you tired your best not to sound bitter you really did .

"Y/n right ? " she asked looking you up and down . You just nodded your head

She was about to speak again when Chris practically ripped the door hinges off as he opened the door wider . As his eyes landed on you there grew and his month hung open as he let out a deep sigh . Making your heat beat fast instead of the numb feeling it has had over the last three weeks .

"Y/n " was all he said a small whisper .

You and Chris eyes were locked missing the fallen smile of Minka as she looked between the two of you here eyebrows knitting . While Scott had a small smirked placed on his lips due to Minka reaction

"Chris I thought we agreed I'd do the door " Minka snapped at chris . Breaking his eye contact with you . To glance at Minka for a split seconde

"Um yeah sorry " he said quickly and looked back deep into your eyes , with the softest blue shade "I... I just heard her name ..." he sighed and he said it slowly and softly . He tilted his head almost like a child went there feelings are hurt . "I haven't..... I havnt see you ... heard form you ... I tried calling but ..I always ... "

"I was busy " you cut him off

Before chris could answer or even process what you said , Lisa pops her head at the other side of the door

"What are you all doing out here ! ... come on come in "she took at step back with a wide smile , as you stepped in .

She pulled you in to a tight high as she always does "isn't this amazing.... finally get to celebrate my boy with hes wife to be "

You closed your eyes as your rested your chin on her shoulder and sighed "it sure is "

You took a step back and put on the widest smile .

What you didnt know was as you were facing momma Evan's. Two blue eyed boys looked at you with soften eyes but both for different reasons .

"Come on let's join the others " lisa said to all of us.

"I couldn't agree more Mrs Evan's " minka replied

"How many times Lisa or even better mom " lisa laught her and Minka walked side by side to the garden

"Ma! " chris said .

"What she will be my daughter in law soon so she better get use it " both lisa and Minka laught and diserperared into the garden . Leaving you , Scott and Chris still in the hall way of the front door .

"How soon exactly ?" Scott asked the fill the uneasy silence .

"Um its gonna be a fall wedding " chris replied

"Oh " was all you said as you felt the pit in your stomach grow and your heart beating fast

"Like .... next year or two ?" Scott said slowly shrugging with his hands in his pockets .

"Uh no " Chris paused and took at quick glance at you and looked at the floor . "This year .... in 3 months " he sighed.

And as if it wasnt possible you felt your heart crack more .

Scott only let out a deep sigh and grab your arm " come on y/n let's get a drink " you nod you head and began to walk to the garden . But you turned your head over your should and with a deep sigh , you dry throat and stinging eyes .

"Contraglation Chris " you sighted, eys watery " I'm... happy for yo... you ... sh ...Minka is a lucky girl " you choked out as Scott pulled you futher away as he tried to save you from futher heart break or for you to continue lying .

"I'm...not " Chris mumbled silently as you were out of earshot .. and took a deep sigh and then finally followed your direction and headed for the back yard.

The never ending growing pit in your soul and tears in your heart was growing more painful as you chuged down your first of many drinks of the night. But what do you expect it's the pain of being in love

Ps I didnt realise that the actress (lily colin)that play Rosie in the movie love Rosie actual dated chris

[anythingandeverything1d]

SNL

You were lounging on the couch trying to watch the bachelor while Harry was anxiously pacing in front of the tv. His head was down and he was talking to himself. You sighed loudly trying to get his attention but he continued pacing and practicing.��“Babe.” you tried. Again, nothing. “Haz.” He didn't even look your direction. “Harry.” He actually turned his back to you. “Harry Edward Styles.” you said louder. His head snapped up, his green eyes full of anxiety as they set upon yours. “Babe what are you doing?”

“Practicing. I have SNL to film tomorrow.” He turned to go back to what he was doing but you stopped him again.

“Harry.” He looked up again. “I asked what you were doing. Not what you think you're doing.” You stood up, walked over to him and held tightly onto his hands, pressing a gentle kiss to them. He sighed and pulled you into a tight hug. 

“I just want to be good. I don't want people to doubt me.”

“Since when have you cared what people think?” you asked while tracing lines in his back.

“I don't..I just - ugh. I have loved SNL for so long. I want to be the kind of person I enjoy seeing on the show. I want to be funny.” 

You smiled and looked up at him. “Haz you are funny.”

“No everyone thinks its cute I try to be funny. I want to actually be funny.”

“I think you are actually funny.” you tap his nose. “You make me laugh everyday.”

“Yeah but your my girlfriend you have to laugh.” He half smiles and kisses your forehead. 

“I don't have to do anything just because I’m your girlfriend.” Harry was a little calmer so you stepped and pulled him to the couch.

He sighed and stood back up. “Im not good enough for this. I don't know how to be funny.” He had tears in your eyes and your heart lurched a little wanting to make it better. 

“Harry don't ever say you're not good enough. You're freaking Harry Edward Styles. You were in the BIGGEST boyband in the world. You topped charts with your solo career. You've traveled all over the world, seen things people can only dream of seeing. You get to do what you love. Harry your incredible. You're a down to earth person. If you just be yourself and don't worry about what you think people are going to think of you, you will kill SNL tomorrow. I promise.” 

You stood up and circled your arms around his waist. You placed a gentle kiss to his lips and he smiled. “But what if people don't think I’m funny?”

“Then they don't think youre funny. What are you going to lose? You love SNL. Its been a dream of yours to do and now youre actually doing it. It doesn't matter if youre good or not because youre going to have fun doing it.”

He sighed and nodded. “I know. I just want to feel prepared...”

“Then lets practice. Come on.” You turned the tv off and dragged him to the piano. “Preform your monologue for me.”

Harry stood there anxious and nerves but you nodded and pushed him along. He smiled and took a deep breath. “It is so great to be here hosting Saturday Night Live for the first time.” You smiled and asked him to continue. “I am so excited to be here as more than just a musical guest. It-it feels” he stumbled and looked at you.

“What does it feel like?”

He thought and then smiled, “Kinda like the feeling when you know I found out you liked me as more than just a friend. Like when we are taking things to the next level.” 

You smiled and laughed. “I love that. So restart from It feels like..”

“It feels amazing to be here. Just like the feeling of finding out someone likes you as more than just a friend. SNL and I are taking things to the next level.” You grinned and gave him a thumbs up while taking a drink of water. “And just like all my serious relationships, we are all going to spend one incredible night together.” You spit the water out of your mouth choking and laughing. Harry laughed as you wiped your mouth with his sleeve. 

“Is it too much?” he asked worried he had crossed a line. 

“No. I loved it. It was a very you type of joke.”

“Okay are you sure...you are dating me..I don't want to make you feel a certain way..”

“Harry keep it seriously I loved it.”

He nodded and continued on. “This is a new territory for me. I get to do some comedy tonight but I do want to make one thing clear to everyone. My priority is the music. It goes music, then comedy.” He smiled as he said the next part, trying not to laugh at his own jokes and that made you smile even bigger. “Well let's me honest. It goes music, then fantastic hair, then comedy, and then family and then friends.” You laughed and could tell he was feeling more confident in himself. “But ultimately I am a very serious musician.” Harry gave you a very serious face you and laughed harder wiping a tear from your eye.

“Harry-” you started but he interrupted. 

“And nothing says serious musician like talking and playing the piano.” He sat at the piano next to you and smiled, bumping your shoulder. “Oh yeah that feels good he” he started playing some keys while he continued talking. “You know.” he looked at you with a raised eyebrow. “In Britain we play piano on the other side of the road.” You laughed again and he took that as a sign to continue. “Now you know that I’m not in a boyband anymore. I’m in a man band now.”

You stood up laughing and trying to catch your breath. Harry was laughing at his own joke but more at your reaction. “A man band” you cried. Harry laughed and looked confused. 

“I am a man.” He argued.

You smiled and took a breath. “I know but Ive never heard that before. It was a good one. Continue.” you told him catching your breath.

He cleared his throat and looked at you. “I was in a band called One Direction. How crazy would it be if they were here tonight.” 

Your mouth dropped. “How did you arrange for tha-”

“Well they're not here. But wouldn't it be crazy if they were though?” You smiled and rolled your eyes sitting next to him again. “They're not. But I love those guys. They’re like my brothers. Niall, Liam, Louis, and uh -oh yeah Ringo.” You smacked his arm laughing but he continued on. “Yeah thats it. We're just so grateful Simon Cowell grew us in those test tubes.”

“Harry!” 

“You know for me its not about the fame or the money.” you nodded your head. “Its about the music, and the art. The art and the music and the music and the art. I believe that music is universal in language. Especially music performed in English because thats the only language I understand. Now maybe some of you aren't convinced I’m a serious musician. You may be asking yourself is he really playing that piano right now? Well if in doubt take a look. Read them and weep. I love being here at SNL, so much history.” He paused and looked at you. “I have learned so much this week so heres a few secrets about the show. Did you know they put make up on the boys too?” you laughed and he smirked. “That is funny. In fact the make up team is so talented, I’m actually Kate McKinnon. And heres a secret about the Rockefeller Christmas tree. It’s Jewish. And also, everyone thinks the cast does a lot of cocaine.”

“Oh my god Harry-”

“They don't. Thats why the shows not good anymore. Except tonight. I think im just about ready to take you home. Mmm yeah that is music. We've got a great show so stick around well be right back.” He stood up and waved. You clapped and stood up, wrapping your arms around his body so that you were climbing up his back. You pressed a kiss on his cheek and laughed. 

“Harry that was so good. You have nothing to worry about.”

“Did you like my jokes?”

“I loved them. I think you're going to momentarily disappoint One Directions fans but they will talk about that moment for weeks.”

“Which part the boys being there or Ringo?”

You laughed and shook your head, “All of it.” Harry sat you down and you hugged him tightly again. “Im seriously so proud of you.”

“Don't be too proud yet. I haven't done it yet.” He blushed but still held his smile.

“Babe you're going to be amazing. I don't even doubt it.”

You pressed your lips to his and he smiled, kissing you back. “Thanks for being the best cheerleader.”

“Anytime Haz, now can we finish the bachelor please?”

Harry nodded and scooped you into his arms, carrying you back to the couch. “Which fool do we have tonight.”

“Still Peter. He’s playing games though telling all the girls he loves them.”

“Psh what a fool.” Harry kissed your face over and over and you laughed. “Do you really think I’m that funny?”

“I think you are hilarious.” You kissed him again and smiled before turning your attention back to the tv.

Harry smiled and nodded, all the anxiety he originally had was gone. He seemed more confident as he settled into the couch with you. “Im gonna kill this monologue. I’m going to be the best host.”

“Yes you are.” you smiled brushing his hair back from his face. “If the music thing ends up failing at least you have comedy.” Harry laughed shaking his head and watched tv. 

“Im just glad I have you here through it all. I love you.”

“I love you too. Now shhhh its about time for the rose ceremony.” 

---

Got this request. Hope you enjoy!

xoxo

[cloudy-ocs]

— masterlist

1. The Survival Show

mari and jisung were aware of the mutual hatred between each other, they tried not to let it show during filming, but they did have their slip ups.

mari and felix were eliminated together, this was shocking to not only the boys but to everyone watching. for their to not only be two eliminations in one but to also have both the foreigners be eliminated, this wasn’t supposed to happen.

and unfortunately, someone had very strong feelings about it.

when jyp walked out mari was the first to let her emotions free, she covered her mouth as she began crying, arms automatically locking around the boy next to her, both shocked and disappointed.

the two got around, saying their goodbyes, hugging each of the boys, apologising profusely. there was really only one person left to say goodbye to, and that was jisung, who had his arms crossed as he tried not to cry.

when mari pulled him into a hug he didn’t refuse, though he didn’t make an effort to hug her back, only leaning in to whisper his disappointment to her.

“maybe if you listened to me and tried harder, you wouldn’t be leaving us behind.” and with that he pulled himself away from her, ignoring the look he had received from chan.

“i’m sorry.”

2. When They Became 10 Again

there was no way to describe the feelings she felt, the support from the audience, the boys, jyp, it left her feeling warm and excited.

felix, minho and mari all shared a hug, gripping each other tightly, almost as though letting go would mean one of them would leave again. they felt the others crowd around them, forming a larger hug around the three, everyone smiling from ear to ear.

the group dispersed into smaller groups, everyone celebrating the return of the three members with cheers and hugs.

that night was truly a night of surprises for mari, as jisung walked up to her, though he didn’t look too happy, and gave her an awkward hug, patting her back before letting go.

“welcome back, not that i missed annoying you or anything, i still hate you.”

and for once, mari didn’t take offence to it, giving him a smile she shook her head.

“i hate you too.”

3. That One V-Live “iM AUSTRALIAN.”

“who’s that behind the door? oh there’s someone behind the door ?” mari didn’t actually think anyone was behind her, she focused on the screen trying to watch for any movement and when she came up short she went back to the comments, not realising that there in fact, was, someone behind her.

he creeped up behind her as slowly and quietly as he could in a dance studio, though halfway through his patenience ran thin and he decided to just bolt at her instead.

he ran up behind her and slammed his hands against her as he yelled out, successfully scaring mari and making her drop the device she was using.

“jisung, what the hell!” clearly he was amused as he was now clutching his stomach whilst laughing.

“you should’ve seen how high you jumped, you were like a cat.”

unamused, mari got up and grabbed the gym ball closest to her, the camera capturing both of them perfectly in frame.

“yeah you wanna see what’s funny?” and without giving him a chance to respond, she threw the exercise ball, watching as it hit him square in the chest, laughing at him as he fell back.

however, the ball had rebounded off of him and was now about to hit mari square in the face.

without a second to dodge, mari was hit by the ball, also falling back from the impact.

the two, now both of the floor, looked at each other for a moment before laughing, not together but at one another.

“imagine being dumb enough to get hit by the balk you threw.”

“imagine being so weak you literally fly from the impact.”

“i’M NOT WEAK, I GO TO THE GYM WITH CHAN.”

“i’m gonna tell him you didn’t use formalities.”

“you never use formalities, hypocrite.”

“i’M AUSTRALIAN.”

4. Learning How To Produce

“you’re so bad at this, it’s actually painful to watch.”

“jisung, shut up, ive never done something like this before.” he laughed at her as she pouted, eyes still focused on the screen as she tried adding more bass to the song.

“you’re gonna overdo it.”

“i like a heavy bass, stop distracting me.”

“you’re gonna make the bass too overpowering and it’s gonna sound bad.”

“you sound bad.”

“i do not sound bad, thank you very much.”

“okay, sungie.”

he smiled triumphantly as she continued to work on the song, her mind solely focused on the production of the song, her eyes zoned in and her tongue slightly poking out between her lips.

“i think i’m done.” mari smiled proudly at the screen, then to jisung, who was already staring at her in amusement.

“okay, play it.”

so, jisung may have been right on the overdoing it, but mari wasn’t about to let him know that, he didn’t need a bigger ego boost.

“i love it.” she said whilst cringing outwardly at the sound.

she huffed, pausing the song before sheepishly turning towards jisung.

“can you help me fix it?”

“what’s the magic word?”

“...please?”

“wrong.”

“i-”

“tell me i am the most talented, amazing, handsome all rounder idol you’ve ever met.”

“lying is a sin, jisung.”

“i hate you.”

“it’s mutual.”

he glared at her then at the screen where the composed song was layed out, his glare turning into him trying to hold back his laughter.

“i’m sorry, i really don’t want to laugh but, it’s so bad. i didn’t even realise someone could make a song composition this bad.”

mari frowned at him, this time she was genuinely upset. sure it wasn’t the best, but she tried, and she was proud of herself, or was proud of herself.

she wasn’t necessarily angry at jisung, but her feelings were hurt and her ego was crushed, she sniffed before pulling the keyboard towards her, deleting the whole song before grabbing her hoodie and walking out of the studio.

she ignored jisung’s calls of her name and continued towards the elevator, okay so maybe she was being over dramatic, but she didn’t like being laughed at, no one likes being laughed at.

“mari i’m sorry, it wasn’t that bad, i was just teasing.”

“go away, i’m going back to the dorms.”

“please don’t go back with puffy eyes, they’re gonna think i made you cry and then felix is gonna get mad at me.”

“you did make me cry.”

“i said i’m sorry, here, i’ll help you make a better song, free of the magic word.”

“it wasn’t even a word you idiot.”

“that’s bullying.” he shut his mouth as she glared at him, wiping her tears as she held his gaze, he sighed before grabbing her wrist and gently pulling her back to the room, forcing her to sit back in the chair.

“i promise i’ll help you, and i won’t laugh, i know how hard it is when you first start.”

“exactly, you jerk.”

“i was just tEASING YOU.”

“yOU WERE BEING MEAN, you laughed at me.”

he let out an exasperated sigh, rubbing his face in annoyance before exhaling once again.

“okay, i’m sorry, i swear i won’t laugh.”

mari went quiet, looking down at her hands before slowly looking back up at him, holding out her pinky.

“pinky promise?”

“i-” he rolled his eyes, trying to hold back his smile as he linked his pinky with hers.

“pInkY PrOmise.”

“dONT MOCK ME.”

5. The Sydney oPrAh House

“i love sydney.”

“i know you do, mar.”

“i’ve missed sydney.”

“i know you have.”

“i want to go see the sydney opera house, jisung.”

“i know- wait what.”

“the sydney opera house? i wanna go see it.”

“opera? wait i’m so confused, i thought it was the sydney oprah house...”

“...”

“it’s opera?”

“are you dumb?”

“DONT QUESTION MY INTELLIGENCE, IM VERY SMART.”

“YOU THOUGHT IT WAS OPRAH THIS WHOLE TIME? WHAT NEXT, ‘oh i thought it was one of oprah’s houses’?”

“... maybe.”

“you’re annoying.”

“how do you even know that word? your korean isn’t even that good.”

“i take full offence to that.”

“good, you were meant to.”

“i hate you.”

“don’t worry mar, it’s mutual.”

and as the two bicker back and forth, chan and minho stare at them from a distance, watching in amusement as they argue.

“they love each other.”

“oh for sure, if something happened to mari, jisung would go wild.”

“same goes for mari.”

“ah, kids.”

[shhh-no-ones-home]

fuse (2/2) slash x reader x izzy stradlin

+++++++++

part 1 part 2

a part two was suggested by @slashscowboyboots "izzy and reader are both miserable without each other."

i know its not a request but i couldnt help myself. i appreciate you for the ideas and really enjoyed writing this. i hope you like it

song: heather by conan gray

tag list: @cynic-spirit @satans-arse @slashscowboyboots @littlemisscare-all

+++++++++

i seethed as i watched izzy flirt with the groupie; him and axl both gently touching her arm as she laughed with them. slash just pulled me closer to him, resting his head into the crook of my neck.

"i still think you need to talk to him. this has gone on long enough."

i crossed my arms over my chest.

"what do you care? you're getting laid."

i hissed. he rested his hands on my hips, leaning back to look at me like i was crazy. i sighed in defeat.

"youre right, im sorry. he just makes me so mad."

he shook his head before resuming his position.

"and you dont think you make him mad? you told him off less than a month ago and neither of you have talked since, just aggressive glances at each other across venues, buses, and restaurants."

he snaked his arms around my torso in a hug and i ran my hands lightly across them, closing my eyes and leaning into his touch.

"yeah but weve been over this, he hasnt let up with them though."

i said motioning to the group of girls now surrounding them, begging for attention like dogs.

"but he hasnt been with any of them since the fight, cant you see that?"

he asked and turned to look at him a little bewildered.

"what do you mean?"

he sent me a knowing look.

"we both know hes dying without you. he may still party and flirt and get off, but he hasnt been with any of those girls."

i looked back over at him longingly, catching him glancing at me before looking away quickly. i tapped saul's hand gently, asking to be let go as i stood upright. he held my hand for a second, trying to study my face.

"ill be back, i need some air."

i said slipping my crew pass out of my pocket and onto my neck.

"ill be here when you get back."

he said, letting me leave. i stood up tall, walking with power and my head held high as i walked past the group of them to the door. i pushed it open, squinting my eyes as the setting sun glared in my face. i sighed in relief as the warm evening air engulfed me, the breeze pushing my hair around my shoulders as i leaned into the banister in front of me.

"dont you know its dangerous to be out here by yourself? we have some pretty crazy fans after all."

i heard izzy say behind me, hearing the door click closed a second later.

"its nice to know you still care."

i quipped back, not looking at him as he appeared next to me, lighting a cigarette before mirroring how i was standing.

"of course i do, im just surprised you didnt bring slash out here for a make-out session or something."

i snorted, shaking my head as i looked to the concrete below us.

"guess i just needed a break."

i saw him nod out of the corner of my eye, blowing smoke out into the open air.

"how much of  break?"

he asked hesitantly. i finally looked at him and he looked as lost as i was.

"not sure yet, it depends."

he looked at me quizzically.

"on?"

i breathed deeply.

"on you."

he smirked at me.

"is that so?"

i held a finger in the air.

"before you ask if he's not doing it for me i need you to know that we've only slept together twice in the last month and he is just comforting me cause youve been an asshole this whole tour."

he drew his brows in protest.

"hey! if anything, you started this!"

i leaned back.

"oh i started this? if i remember correctly, you were the one sleeping around after confessing your undying love to me. i had every right to find someone new!"

he scoffed at me, rolling his head to the side.

"is that so? well why did it have to be slash?"

i motioned to the door.

"would you rather it have been axl? steven maybe?"

i said angrily.

"of course not!"

i threw my hands in the air.

"who then? who would you rather i be with?"

he groaned.

"me god damnit!"

he yelled, and i froze.

"i want you to be with me!"

he stepped closer and i stepped back. i watched with wide eyes as he shook his head.

"i do love you, and im an idiot for not showing you that sooner, okay. i will admit that. im an even bigger idiot for not saying something sooner. ive been miserable without you. i cant sleep, i cant eat, i cant think straight."

i sighed heavily.

"and i havent slept with any of those girls since our fight. it just ruined me knowing how mad that made you. and evey part of me wanted to, to make you jealous or get rise out of you but you seemed so happy with slash. its been eating away at me."

i looked down a little ashamed.

"im not happier with slash, izzy. i love you. hes just a friend at best but he was also there when you werent. and hell yeah i was jealous, i was pissed that youve been surrounded by other girls this whole time. it made me so mad cause i missed you. i missed us."

i confessed, looking up at him with sad eyes. he put his cigarette out against the metal banister before flicking the filter away from him.

"i missed us too. can we please go back to what we were doing before? i dont know if i can stand much more of this tour without you."

he said a little broken. i nodded, letting him step closer this time. his hands found their way slowly to my hips as he looked down at me endearingly.

"im so sorry."

he said sincerely, touching my face gently and running his thumb over my cheek. it was a touch i had missed so much and it made me want to cry. i could feel my heart pounding in my chest as he leaned down and kissed me softly. i hummed in content against him as our mouths moved together, my fingers finding their way to the hair at the back of his neck.

"oh, fucking finally."

i heard from the door, both of us pulling away from each other. there was slash standing in the doorway, grinning from ear to ear. i couldnt help the blush creeping its way to my face as izzy held me to him.

"uh, yeah. sorry i didnt come back, i was a little busy."

he raised his beer bottle to me in cheers.

"no worries babe, take all the time you need, im just glad youre fixing things."

i looked up at izzy who was smiling down at me.

"yeah, she might not be coming back to you."

he said before kissing me again, making me giggle into him. i heard slash laugh and then the door clicking behind him as he went back inside. izzy rested his forehead against mine.

"im never letting you go again."

he said pecking me on the lips quickly. i looked between his eyes.

"you promise?"

he nodded against me.

"i promise."

[marshmallowprotection]

I... okay. I can't stop thinking about it. The sadist me and the shy me are in conflict over this fr

So, I dress rather modestly (not that I have much to show in the first place but im happy with that lol), i dont really like wearing v-necks or short shorts, stuff like that. Although i do love ripped jeans/shorts uwu. But all this time in lockdown, being home more, made me realize that, within the comfort of my home (even with a friend over), i rather like looser clothing. In particular, wearing pull-over sweaters without a shirt underneath (with the exception of two, which are too thin). And i even got a new pair of shorts last month which are definitely my favourite (i get a tiny bit nervous tho because if you look close enough you can see some of my scars, but ive gotten pretty careless about all that with friends cos eh theyre old scars), even though they are a little shorter than im used to, like a little bit above mid-thigh when standing. Theyre this really nice shade of grey, with rips in the front and deep pockets which make a nice barrier between my skin and the rips cos i'd feel a little too exposed otherwise lol. They're loose, too, and just... i dunno, i love 'em! Although they tend to ride up quite a bit when i sit down ^^"

As for the sweater, I'm actually wearing my favourite rn; it's also new but not as new as those shorts. Black ripped jeans, black undershirt, blue-to-grey gradiente sweater (which is also v soft on the inside uwu). Except, once online classes are over, or if im not going outside, i take the undershirt off. And this sweater has a wide v-neck and is short; like standing normally it covers everything, but when i raise my arms up to stretch (which i do frequently cos UGH my back), it shows like an inch or two of skin--

You can probably see where I'm going with this.

The shy part of me is like, "u have to wear the undershirt"; "u cant wear shorts that short/that ride up like that"; "dont even wear a choker like u do in 1/4 ur outfits its DANGEORUSSS"

The sadistic part of me, however, is grinning. "Nah u would totally wear it without the tank top"; "wear those shorts, see how he reacts"; "tomato boy saeyoung is ur fuel source cmon just do it"

I honestly have no idea what i would do. Although it would probably at least start with the former. And for the latter, i wouldnt bring any attention to it lol. Id just... wear it. And of course bite my lip, trying fruitlessly to suppress a grin if/when i get some tomato-faced reaction lol

[417]

(Aaaand i probably over-explained that... but my brain sometimes can't tell which details are relevant and which aren't, sorry ^^")

It's clothes. You can wear whatever you want to wear and you don't have to explain your style or why you're doing it to anyone. There are no rules and if someone tells you that you can undress the way you want then you punch them in the face. Okay, maybe not punch, but you get the point. Wear whatever you want. If you wanna be comfy, be comfy.

That's what I tell myself. For the longest time, I was a bigger girl until I got sick, and people never let me think I could wear a crop top. I felt like I'd never look good. Well, I got one, I wore one, and it felt good. WEAR CLOTHES THAT YOU WANT TO WEAR. Ideally, I would have big skirts and sweaters but I'm too poor for my aesthetic, but still. Wear what you love!

The only thing that I can say that would bother or get to Saeyoung is if you wore a sweater and you stretched and he saw your stomach. He would be flustered and hastily look away because he's chugging respect women juice. He just thinks you're adorable. He'd be flustered if you wore a sweater or a chicken suit, don't get me wrong here. That's Saeyoung for you. Loves you no matter your style.

[diamondcamefromhell]

Timeless love

Jaskier x female reader series part 3

[PART 1] ; [PART  2]

Summary: This is an AU, where Y/N is a young woman, trying to make ends meet with her freelancing writing job. She lives in her small Nottingham studio apartment along with her cat Apollo. Things change when one evening as she is waiting for her taxi, she meets what she thinks is Joey Batey, but the man in front of her is convinced he’s Jaskier, a character from her current favorite show. Y/N now has to figure out what to do.

Warnings: Swearing, vomit, alcoholism and alcohol-related borderline abuse

Word count: 2,251

NOTE:

This part has some heavier stuff than any other work Ive written, so please, proceed with caution for your own sake. nothing too graphic happens, but still want to make sure you know that it does have a certain character that could be triggering to some. he wont be a dominant feature in all parts, but i feel it’s important for Jaskier to interact with people like that, as he continues to learn about our world. 

hope you enjoy this part nonetheless. feedback, as always, is greatly appreciated <3 [im really nervous to see what yall think]

I don’t know when, but I managed to get some sleep. Not much, as it was just 7 am when Apollo started meowing and jumping on me, asking to be fed. I sit up, my gaze immediately going to the coach, where Jaskier seemed to be sleeping soundly.

I crawl out of the bed, going to the kitchen, where I see lute back by the fridge. He eventually put it down last night. I wonder how long did it take for him to fall asleep. I sigh, as quietly as possible pouring some food for my cat, who purrs as a thank you.

I stare out the window, as cars start going up and down the street. The town is waking up. I tiptoe around my apartment to go get my laptop from the coffee table. I am surprised Jaskier didn’t ask about it last night. But then again, he didn’t know most of the things in my apartment, he probably was overwhelmed.

I go back to my bed, opening and booting up my old friend. As I enter the password, I am greeted with a picture of him and Geralt on that rock, at the end of episode 6. I loved that whole scene so much. I stare at it, not believing the same bard is sleeping on my coach. I know better, so I change the picture to one of the default ones.

I open chrome, exiting the youtube page that has his song on it. He is not ready for that.

Or maybe I wasn’t. But it didn’t matter.

I go to email, checking for work. I have a few requests, and I decide it’s best to get some work done before Jaskier wakes up and we have to have more awkward conversations. I manage to write two articles, and then he awakens.

His face, for a second, is full of confusion, but then he seems to remember where he is. Now, his expression grows sad. I know he probably wished this were just a nightmare. I know he wished to wake up, back home. With Geralt and even Yennefer. But instead he got me and Apollo, who was already jumping on the coach, greeting Jaskier.

“So that wasn’t a dream,” he murmurs, but I catch it. I close my laptop.

“I’m afraid not.” I respond, as he looks at me, his expression still cold. “I’m sorry.”

“Well, what can you do.” He forces a smile, which I don’t really like, but I decide it’s best not to comment on that. Instead, I nod.

“I wish I could do something. Anyway,” I clear my throat. “Are you up to trying something new?”

“Depends on what it is.” Jaskier perks up, his clouded gaze clearing a little.

“Dirty beans.” I say, jumping out of my bed, I smirk at him. “Or as people call it – coffee.”

“I think I will pass on dirty beans.” He frowns and I giggle.

“You will not.” I say, as he smiles, just a little. And I know it’s genuine. A little hope in these dark times.

I go turn on my coffee maker, putting in the capsule. I decide to make him a latte, nothing too strong. I make myself giggle, when I realize he may be lactose intolerant. I guess we will find out. I stare at him, and decide to add two sugars.

For myself, however, I go black, with one sugar. I need the energy, as I feel absolutely exhausted. I take the drinks, giving him his cup. He sniffs the drink, taking a sip. I don’t sit down, closely watching his reaction.

He doesn’t frown, and actually looks pleasantly surprised. Smile curls his lips, and I catch myself smiling too.

“Glad you like my dirty beans.” I say, finally sitting down, sipping my own. The bitter taste hits my taste buds, waking me up in an instant.

“It’s nice. Thank you.” I smile.

“You are welcome, Jaskier.” I say, leaning back on the couch. “Let me know if you are hungry, I will cook something.”

“I will, thanks.” I glance at him, realizing how surreal it is. Yet we both seem calm.

“Then we might need to go out. Try to see if we can find something around here.” I feel anxiety rush over me. “It’s best if we do it in a day too. Safer.”

“What will we look for?” I shrug, closing my eyes.

“We’ll see it when we find it.” I look at his attire now. “However, you will have to change.”

“Sorry, I didn’t pack anything.” He says, smirking, and I feel a wave of ease wash over me. I am glad he is making jokes.

“I have some clothes that should fit you. I think.” He looks confused, nearly scared, so I continue. “Not my clothes, but I buy some for Dave, he sometimes needs them, because well… he doesn’t have that much.”

“Dave?” I cant read Jaskier’s tone, but he seems confused.

“He lives in the apartment in front of mine. We are… acquaintances at best.” Jaskier nods, as I place my coffee down.

I rush to my small wardrobe, going to the second drawer, where I keep clothes for Dave. Poor guy vomits on himself so often, and he doesn’t know how to wash clothes exactly. If they’re not too disgusting, I wash them, but I keep fresh ones at hand.

I get them at a thrift store, so most of them aren’t to fancy or anything.

I pull a pair of old black jeans, trying to imagine if Jaskier could fit in them. I think he should, but then again, I didn’t exactly examine how he looks that much. I’ve seen it for hours on tv. Dave is not a big man, and I thank my angels for that, as I pull a white shirt that should fit Jaskier too. I dig around to find a pink hoodie.

For a moment I think he wouldn’t wear it, but then I remember what he is wearing now and realize he probably would be fine with a bit of pink. I turn around, revealing his outfit, but Jaskier looks confused.

“Please tell me you know how to dress yourself.” I tease, and he laughs.

“I do, if you can’t tell, I dress nicely.” I chuckle, but don’t respond. “This is weird.”

“Just change.” I throw the clothes to him, and he starts undressing before my very own eyes. It takes me a moment for shock to pass away, before the blush rushes to my face. “In the bathroom for Christs sake!”

I point to the only other room in my apartment as the bard looks very confused. But one look at me, flustered and red sends the message, as he smirks, gathering his clothes and leaving the room. I fan my face with my hands.

Now I don’t meant to act like such a loser and fear seeing a man’s nipple. It’s just that I know I might have to stay with him for a couple more days, so it might make things weird. Also, I already had a crush on him, kinda, and I didn’t want to deepen it even more.

When he comes out, I am already seated, calmed down and drinking my coffee. I turn my face and immediately feel a wave of something rush over me. He looks so different. The pants are a bit big, I notice, but nothing a belt cant fix. The shirt, however, fits perfect, hugging his body. And the zip up hoodie ads a familiar pop of colour.

I feel my face become hot again.

“Verdict?” He asks, twirling around.

“You need a belt.” I say in one breath, rushing to get him the damn thing, before his pants fall off. Which, they nearly did already. When they are secure, I give one final look. “You look normal, so you’re good, I guess.”

“I don’t feel normal.” He says bitterly, and I sigh.

“I know, Jaskier. Not your usual attire, but this way, you will stand out less.” I stare at him, knowing there is a way bigger problem at hand.

He now literally looks like Joey Batey. An exact replica. And if someone, who has seen the hit show, sees him, it will be bad. I suddenly get a headache.

“We have a different problem. You look exactly like someone well known. That’s why I mistook you when I saw you last night.” I say, rubbing my temples.

“Who?” I sigh again.

“Joey. Joey Batey.” I grunt, closing my eyes. “If people recognize you as him, there might be… trouble.”

“Do townsfolk know him that well?” I glare at the man, but then I remember he seemingly knows nothing about my world. So I ease up.

“Yes. He’s like Geralt.” I compare. “The world just knows him. I guess we will have to stay close to home. And wear your hood up.”

I ignore my headache, chugging down my coffee, as Jaskier puts his hood up. He looks adorable, but I don’t say that, instead I nod, approving. I decide to go without breakfast, as the more I think about having to go outside, the more anxious I get.

And I am out of my medication, since I don’t like going to a doctor.  I silently curse myself out, as we make our leave. The corridor still stinks, so I give Jaskier an apologetic glance, who in return gives me a soft smile. I feel a chill rush down my spine, when the door behind our backs open. I drop my keys, thankfully after I already locked the door.

I quickly pick them up, turning around to face my neighbour. Dave is staring at Jaskier, his eyes wide with surprise. He has never seen me bring a man home.

Dave is wearing grey joggers, with various stains on it. I notice some blood, but realize it’s best not to ask, not with Jaskier in the earshot. His shirt also clearly has dried vomit on it, and he oozes of vodka and something else. It makes me dizzy and sick.

I try to imagine what the bard is seeing. A frail, tiny white male. Bald, but with a black creepstache. Shaking uncontrollably. It must be so confusing. I want for us to get away, only then I notice Jaskier shielding me ever so slightly. My heart beats faster.

“Hello Dave.” I say through my teeth, stepping in front of Jaskier, so now I would shield him from the curious stare.

“Y/N, sweetheart. Didn’t know you had company.” He says, holding on his door frame, stabilizing himself. I force a smile.

“Yes, well. He’s a friend.” I say, stepping in front of ‘my friend’ more. Dave wasn’t generally violent, but he could get jealous and insecure from every male person who ever walked this earth. Let’s say he has a fragile ego.

“Introduce us, then!” He smiles, and I notice he’s missing his front tooth now. Poor man.

“I’d rather not, Dave.” I say, firmly, as he takes a step forward, using me as a stabilizer now. I want to step away, but I know it would cause a scene. And he wasn’t generally violent, but there instances.

“C’mon sweetheart.” He leans in, whispering. “Your friends are my friends.”

“I said no.” My voice comes out weak as the stench from his is making me feel dizzy. I feel like I am about to throw up.

“She has said no, Dave.” Jaskier speaks, startling me. I almost forgot he was there. He steadies me, as I didn’t even realize I was drifting back. Then I notice my hands shaking. I’m beginning to panic. Fuck.

“We are in a rush, Dave.” I deescalate the situation, as my neighbor was shooting daggers at Jaskier. “Next time, I will introduce you two.”

“Where are you going?” Dave steps back, but he grabs my upper hand. I get startled, squirming a little. That seems to tip off Jaskier.

“Let go.” He steps in front of me now, his voice firm. Dave, to my surprise, listens, letting me go immediately.

“You got yourself a good man, Y/N.” He says, laughing. He steps in his apartment, slamming the door. I lean on the wall, taking a couple deep breaths, which don’t help as it stinks in here.

“Are you okay?” I shake my head.

“I need fresh air.”

I practically jump down the stairs, and when I reach outside, I go around the corner to throw up. My stomach hurts.

Dave is usually kind. He rarely ever lays his hands on me, but whenever he does, it’s never nice. I wish Jaskier wasn’t there to witness this. I glance over my shoulder, to see his worried look, I straighten up, wiping my mouth.

“I’m fine.” I grunt, ignoring the fact that his gaze doesn’t change.

“You shouldn’t have to deal with that, a lady like you…” I lift my hand, annoyed. He get’s the hint, shutting up.

“In this world, Jaskier, I’m no lady.” I put my hair behind the ear, anxiously looking around. “Get used to that.”

“It’s not fair.” He argues, worry not leaving his face. I sigh, walking past him.

“The world isn’t fair.” I bitterly say, before taking a deep breath. I face Jaskier again. “Now let’s look for something that could help you.”

He knows this conversation is over, as I feel anxiety come back. I have no idea what to look for or where to even begin.

[PART 4]

~~~~~~~~

TAG LIST [if you wish to be added or removed from the tag list, lmk]

@ultracolorfulnerdcollection ; @viyamystic ; @sleepyblossom ; @killjoy-acid-crash

[angstalottle]

Lana On The Case

Part 3

Lana knew she shouldn’t have been expecting much, especially after spending the last week lying in bed stewing in her own filth and misery.

That didn’t change the fact that her current appearance still shocked her.

Her skin had gained an ashen quality about it and dark circles under her eyes.

She was sure is Red hadn’t practically force fed her she was have lost much more weight then she already had.

She felt drained and heavy, like her life was sucked out from her when Hannah left her…

Keith showing up had given her a small glimmer of excitement perhaps even hope but as soon as he was gone and she was left alone to her thoughts they turned right back to the fact that her best friend was gone from her life forever.

That thought hurt even more than knowing her sweet wonderful Hannah killed people.

Job offer or not Lana likely would have spent the rest of her life lying in her bed if her aunties hadn’t decided to do something about it.

One moment she's dozing staring into space, the next Blue has pulled her covers away while Re dumped a bucket of warm soapy water over her.

The two manhandled her out of bed and into some clean clothes before giving her two options.

One was to stay cooped up inside and suffer through them inviting every nosey friend they could think of over to omard her with questions and pinched cheeks followed by of course the dreaded relationship advice that everyone over a certain age believed they knew.

Or go down to the police station and actually do something with her life/

Though neither option was particularly fun in the end Lana chose to go out mainly because Red had also made a swinging joke which of course practically sent her bolting through the door.

The police station like everything else in the village was only a short walk away from the Altea estate, you could get pretty much anywhere by cutting through the large gardens that have unfortunately fallen into a state of disrepair.

The lady of the manor had died when Lana was away and since then the place hadn’t been the same, like some of the beauty of the world left when she did.

As far as she knew the only daughter of the family Allura was away for school or something while her father worked in London.

Lana had fond memories of Allura, being a few years younger then the girl and quite a bit poorer, she always seemed like this fairy princess that could have anything or do anything.

Looks like not even princesses could escape tragedy.

Lana hiked up her skirt as she climbed over the thick mess of weeds and flowers careful not to disturb anything as she passed through.

Even if everyone took the shortcut it was an unsaid rule that you were not to disturb the gardens or ever go close to the house.

Of course when Lance got her foot caught in a bramble and fell face first into the ground she broke that rule by flattening at least a dozen flowers beneath her.

“Oh dear are you alright?” A woman wearing a veil and long white gloves asked as she hurried over from the main house.

Odd appearance aside what really caught Lana’s attention was her snow white hair. A characteristic that was common amongst the Altean family.

Going off her build she could have been anywhere between 20-30 but without the face or hands it really was impossible to tell.

Lana felt her cheeks burn as she pulled herself up and dusted herself down frowning at the rip that now worked its way up her blue skirt.

The woman put her hands on her dress and examined the rip tutting softly “we really must get the gardener back in this place really has fallen to ruin.”

Now that she was closer Lana could smell the sweet scent of roses coming off her in such a large volume it would almost be suffocating if they weren't outside.

“Do you work here?” Lana asked trying to swallow her embarrassment while this strange woman kept hold of her skirt.

One strong breeze and she would see next weeks washing.

The woman chuckled “not exactly. I used to live here I never actually planned on returning but in light of my father's disappearance I suppose I didn’t have much choice.”

Lana couldn’t help but flinch, since what Hannah did came to light any case of men running off in the middle of the night or simply not returning after a day out is now considered suspect.

Their still digging up all the bodies and people have been flocking from all over in search of their missing husbands, fathers and brothers.

Lana then realised something very important.

Mainly that if Alfor was missing and this woman was his daughter then it must have been Allura!

“Allura?”

Lana couldn’t see her face but she imagined a smile on those pretty pink painted lips she used to know very well.

“That’s me, im sorry but who are you?”

Lana had her suspicions of course that this was all a scam, someone swooping in to steal the Altean family fortune, but she wasn’t really in the mood for any other mysteries right now.

That and according to Keith she was pretty forgettable.

“Oh im Lana… I used to play with you in the garden as a kid.”

“Oh my i'm so sorry Lana, im afraid my memory hasn’t been that good since the accident. She gestured to her veil and gloves “I got caught up in the Blitz and i'm afraid my appearance paid a higher price then by mind.”

Lana felt guilt crawl into her stomach, well at least she didn’t outright accuse  her of being a con artist. Besides Coran was a dear friend of the family, there's no way someone would be able to just take over Allura’s life without him noticing.

“Im sorry, I didn’t realise.”

Allura waved her off finally letting go of her skirt “don’t worry about it, ive made my peace with my situation, it is a tad lonely though, people aren't exactly eager to visit the manor these days.” She sounded so sincerely sad that Lana couldn’t help but feel for her.

She knew what it was like to lose everything because of a situation out of her control, the war had stolen many things from them, Lana was lucky to keep her beauty at least.

“Well then I suppose I have no choice but to come round for tea, I would invite you to my aunts cottage but they tend to get too excited around anyone they used to know.”

Lana gave her the best smile she could manage and was rewarded by Allura taking her hands and kissing them.

Once again her face turned an interesting shade of red.

“That sounds simply wonderful Lana, how about Thursday at 8 o'clock?”

Lana had lost her ability to form words so simply nodded earning her a small chuckle in response.

“I don’t want to keep you if your busy so ill just see you Thursday?” Allura asked startling Lana out of her stupor.

“Yes I should go, but i'll erm see you then I promise.”

Lana stuttered deciding it was best to continue on her way before she made an even bigger fool of herself so mustered up what grace she had to give an awkward curtsy realising that was dumb halfway through and instead turned and hurried on her way hitting herself muttering “stupid stupid stupid” over and over again until she finally arrived at the police station.

As expected of a small town the police station was fairly quiet this time of day home only to the drunks that were picked up the night before and only now being released to go back to their family or in some cases the church.

Of course one would expect it to be much busier with the number of bodies being dug up but unfortunately since Hannah left and it became national news the investigation had been taken over by some fancy out of state law enforcement that walk around in nice suits and a stuck up attitude to match their overall pompous appearance.

Going off the sour atmosphere in the station no one was too pleased to have the villages first ever big case stolen from under them.

Lana did her best to smile politely as she made her way to reception preparing herself for awkward small talk with someone she really hoped wouldn't recognise her.

“Hello im here-”

“If you got a crime to report fill out the form if not get lost.”

The woman behind the desk looked too young to be working, her slight frame and big doe eyes making her seem like she couldn't be much older than 15 but then again looks can be deceiving. Like the fact that despite wearing big round glasses and squinting at a book in front of her the glass within the frame appeared to be purely decorative and not actually serve any function.

Lana cleared her throat “no actually i'm here about the job. Im expected.”

This time she at least bothered to look up from her book and glanced Lana up and down “what they replacing me with some tramp, i've worked here ten years and they bring in some totty to take my job”

Lana quickly held up her hands feeling actually pretty threatened by this tiny angry lady “no! No i'm the new consultant im supposed to be working with Keith and-”

“Oi Keith! Some broad here says shes your new partner!” She yelled and just like that, all eyes were on her.

Lana smiled awkwardly at them really wishing a hole would appear beneath her and swallow her up whole so she could escape this situation.

However the only thing the universe sent her was a very flustered keith running in from the back.

He was carrying a stack of papers and had that god awful mullet tied back in a ponytail that honestly didn't look half bad on him.

“Thanks Katie i can take her from here.” Keith dropped the papers on her desk “Also Griffin needs you to file these for him.”

“He could do it himself” Katie grumbled grabbing the papers and flicking through them “he didn't even bother filling some of these out!”

Keith quietly grabbed Lana’s arm and pulled her towards him as Katie got distracted with her angry mutterings “Sorry about her, she's just pissed that her dad lost his job to a hot shot whos dad just happens to be a governor.”

“Ah where would be be without nepotism” Lana chuckled letting Keith led her back into a small office where five other people were sat. She assumed the cells were behind one of the closed doors and perhaps the archive room behind another.

It had been a long time since she had been back here, it was certainly before the war was even a possibility and she had broken the wrong persons window and ended up having to wait for her mother by Corans desk.

People tend to say that places from your youth always seem so much smaller when you visit them again. Until now Lana wasn't really sure she bought into that nostalgia fueled nonsense.

But seeing the row of chairs her feet used to dangel off while she prepared an excuse for her behaviour for her furious mother now looked like they would fall apart if she just got too close let alone sat on one.

At least not all the changes were bad. Coran really did deserve that nice office and the title Detective neatly painted above his name.

“You know I was starting to think you wouldn't be coming” Keith said as they came to what Lana assumed was his desk. It was a little away from the others and scattered with paper work in various states of finished. It lacked much personality beyond a couple of knives and oh boy keith standing next to an incredibly attractive man that Lana realised fairly quickly must have been his older brother.

“To be honest i wasn't sure either, my life kinda went to hell but Aunt Blue and Red practically shoved me out of the door.”

Keith chuckled in response as her perched on the edge of his desk “that sounds about right. Though I hate to say it but you've kind of come on boring day. Everyones so desperate for something to do that their even taking the grunt work from me.”

“So what your just sitting around all day?” Lana asked right as a hand collided with her behind.

Lana likes to think herself an understanding woman. Or at least she tries to ever since the instadent where what she thought was a gropper on a train turned out to be a blind man having dropped his cain. So rather then turning around and grabbing the arm of whoever just did that to break over her knee she calmly turned to them.

She came face to face with a tall man that she unfortunately recognised.

James Griffin top of the class when they went to school together and by far the most arrogant man she ever met. And that was before he got a cushy job thanks to his dad.

Lana glared up at him giving him a chance to apologize or say he had mistaken her for his girlfriend that was into that kind of thing.

Instead he just smirked “wow Keith how did you find yourself this hot piece of ass.”

Ok she was going to break his nose now.

Unfortunately before she got the chance keith stepped in front of her “don't talk to her like that Griffin, Coran hired her himself as a consultant and i'm sure he wouldn't take that kind of behaviour.’

James rolled his eyes but did visibly tense as he shot a glance at the closed office door. “Whatever. This whole thing is just for press, whoever heard of a woman police officer. Their far too emotional.”

“Last I checked you were the one that cried when i kicked you in the nuts as kids.” Lana huffed crossing her arms.

“Ah buck teeth Lana! My my you did fill out nicely. How about after work I take you out?” Jame smiled looking her up and down in a way that made her skin crawl.

“How about I tell your mother that you slap my ass, if i remember right she was a reasonable woman.”

Oh how quickly his attitude changed. He swallowed whatever response he had ready and scurried off to his office next to Corans.

“What a creep.”

“Yeah but a rich one.” Keith sighed “you ok?”

“Yeah just kinda pissed i didn't get to make that jerk squeal like in highschool.” Lana noticed a small smirk appear at the corner of keiths lips at that and decided to take it as a win even if she could still feel his disgusting hand on her.

Unfortunately the next few hours were not as exciting.

Lana pulled up a chair across from Keith and kept herself busy by flicking pieces of paper at him, an activity that he avoided joining in with for exactly ten minutes.

They were so wrapped up in their game that they didn't notice coran standing next to the desk until after Keith made the winning shot and jumped up to let out a victory cry.

“It's nice to see you've found a way to keep miss Mclain here entertained during our slow day.” Coran chuckled as Keith startled and quickly cleared his throat trying to hide the blush quickly creeping up his face.

“Detective i can explain”

Coran held his hand up quickly cutting him off “no need, I understand the importance of a bit of fun to avoid dying of boredom. The time for that has now sadly passed im sending you to look into a missing persons cases.”

Keith and lana exchanged a look, while lana’s was excitement Keiths was confusion.

“Sir while im happy for a case why not give it to someone else? Im sure all the others would kill for a case right now.”

Coran simply chuckled to himself handing over a case file “because Kogane your the only officer here I trust not to get side tracked while investigating. That and i'm sure Lana here will make sure your eyes don't wander too far.”

Lana wasn't really sure what he meant by that until they got to the scene of the crime.

Or as everyone else calls it the ‘Galra Gentlemens Club’.

When the club first opened it was met with outcry from the church and the school boards and well anyone with too much time on their hands.

Now after being open for more than a decade, those same people have become the most lucrative clientele, who know stuck up prudes could have such deep pockets for the sinful arts.

Keith had kindly offered to give Lana a ride on the handlebars of his bike since the club was located uphill from the station and there was no way the poor old police car would make it up the whole way. Apparently a replacement was on its way but they had been promising it since before the war.

Lana had of course told Keith that while she appreciate the offer she would find the very idea outlandishly improper, so of course made him ride the handle bars while she put her years of missing the bus and not wanting to be late training to good use.

After a quick check with her compact and a nod to Keith they entered the club.

Lana was no stranger to Gentlemens clubs, she had been to more than a few during the war to meet with people who were usually a lot more willing to give up information when they had a few drinks in them.

This club was no different, everything was a sickening deep purple as if the colour alone could make it classy or hide the disturbingly prominent wet patches on the couches.

Lana tried her very best not to stare at the men already here this early on a weekday morning and instead focused on following Keith back to see the manger.

“Just let me do the talking, guys like this aren't always that nice to women” Keith whispered as he knocked on the door and it swung open to not show a greasy man but instead a very tall muscular woman with short black hair wearing a suit.

Lana felt her mouth go dry just looking at her.

“A-are you the manager here?” Keith asked clearly feeling equally intimidated and aroused as Lana was.

“Yeah i am, who wants to know?” She asked leaning against the doorway and looking down at him. Her gaze however moved quickly from keith to Lana and a smile spread across her face.

“Usually we don't hire new talent outside of auditions but for  a beautiful girl like you im willing to make an exception.”

“I” Lana squeaked finding herself speechless for the first time in a long time.

Thankfully Keith came to her rescue before she could actually contemplate working for this greek god of a woman.

“Actually we came from the police station. You called about one of the dancers going missing?”

The woman nodded and stepped back into the room hurrying them inside before closing the door.

“Yeah my best girl Ezor, she was seen leaving the club last week but no one has seen her since.”

“Does she often disappear like this? Perhaps to visit a gentleman caller miss...?” Keith asked pulling out a notebook while Lana looked around the office.

“Zethrid…. And trust me she's not the sorts to make house calls.”

It was fairly empty save for a punching bag in the corner and a few pictures on the walls. Most of them were group shots of all the dancers in costumes. But those actually on the desk seemed only to contain Zethrid and a slim woman with pink hair tied in a high ponytail. It was just the two of them over and over again smiling like they didn't have a care in the world.

“Is this Ezor here?” Lana asked picking up one picture showing the two in the park, judging from the bunting and celebrating in the background it was the day the allie ‘won’ the war.

Zethrid nodded “yeah that's her… we actually live together and yeah she disappears sometimes but never for this long and never without contacting me.”

“Is it possible she ran off with a sweetheart?” Keith asked taking the picture.

“She wouldn't. I know she's been taken its the only explanation.”

Something told Lana that this relationship was deeper than friendship “The last night she was seen, was there anything unusual happening?”

Zethrid thought for a moment “now that you mention it there was a black car parked outside the club all day. I didn't give it much mind incase it was a customer trying to work up the nerve to come in but it left right after she did.”

“Did you happen to catch the plates?” Keith asked hopefully only to let out a disappointed sigh when she shook her head no.

“But the car was old looking with a dent in the drivers side door.”

Keith noted it down “thanks we will be in touch.”

He led the way out but Zethrid grabbed Lana by the arm before she could leave “please i can't imagine life without her… she's my best friend.”

Lana knew what it was like to lose one of those. So she smiled and put a hand over hers “I promise ill do everything I can to find her.”

Once they were safely outside keith let out a groan “you should promise people anything, it just means you'll get attached to the case.”

“Isn't that the job of a detective though? How can i love a case if i don't care about it?” Lana huffed hitching up her skirt and getting on the bike.

“I'm just saying that it will end up hurting you more if we find her dead in a ditch somewhere.”

Lana rolled her eyes “ever the optimist huh Mullet. Besides we have a lead how many people in town have old black cars?”

“Excluding the police cruiser i'd say seven.” Keith noticed the sceptical look Lana was giving him and rolled his eyes.

“My brother owns the mechanics remember, i help out sometimes and not many people really have cars round here.”

Lana sighed “maybe we should get a second opinion from your dreamy brother.” she batted her eyelashes playfully at him as he climbed onto the handle bars.

“Shut up and pedal we've got a lot of groundwork to do.”

Five hours!

It took five hours to find all the cars, to check for dents and alibis.

In that time Lana fell into two ditches, got attacked by a chicken and the rip in her dress traveled up to past her knee.

As her mother would say she's only some red lipstick away from looking like a whore.

Lana wished she could say that time was well spent and while watching Keith getting chased by an angry family of pigeons that had taken resident in one of the old cars they ultimately ended up on a dead end.

So while the light began to fade and the two slowly walked up to the station the mood was sour.

“It could always have been someone from out of town?” Lana suggested holding the split in her dress to try and keep it from travelling any higher.

“No they would have been too noticeable. If someone from out of town drove through here everyone would know about it by now. We must have missed something.”

Lana shivered in the cool air and was surprised when Keith handed over his jacket without taking his eyes off the path.

The red really did suit him better but the warmth from his body made her feel better.

“We should check surrounding houses tomorrow, maybe one of the cars was taken without the owner realising.”

“And what they dented it and then undented it?’ Keith snorted “no if the dent was fixed it would have had to come through the shop. Shiro may be able to help.”

“I'll try to hide my disappointment” Lana laughed earning her a playful push from Keith which she returned.

The two were laughing and having a moment of fun that when cold hard reality finally came crashing down Lana felt like she had been punched in the face.

Just as they walked in the car they were looking for pulled in behind them.

Old, black and with a large dent on the side.

The only problem was that it was Coran driving it.