#i think exploring her as trans in fic could be fun

[rearranging-deck-chairs]

i was joking, mostly, about the zephyr alexis navine thats such a trans name thing, but i am interested in the dysphoria aspect of bodyswapping which i feel like is almost never acknowledged in anything where bodyswapping happens. bc like, not even necessarily gender-related, getting suddenly put into another body would be distressing for a lot of people. and the nevers is the first thing ive ever seen that acknowledges that. "why are my hands so tiny", "this doughy frame", and the most visceral "this body that i cant fit into"

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

AITA for headcanoning deadnames for trans characters for symbolism purposes?

im a trans guy (minor if it matters) who's been a fan of this one show for a little over a year. none of the characters are canonically trans, but there's a lot of trans allegories to be drawn from the material if you're me or my mutuals at least. the two main characters are both male and i ended up developing an au where they're both explicitly transmasc as a way for me to just explore trans themes in an alternate narrative. i haven't begun writing it yet but definitely plan to once i feel like it's solidly locked in my brain, and i've been sharing snippets & concepts every so often.

part of this was thinking of how they would've chosen their current names, and name symbolism got me considering what they would've changed them away from as well. one character i thought could've initially been named after his mother so i can draw contrasts between the two, and the name i decided on for her has a meaning that highlights her relationship with her father (and the character's relationship with his father in turn); it's also the name of the character's daughter figure in the show. a lot of the other main character's backstory kind of revolves around his dead sister, so i thought by making his deadname that sister's name then i could turn that into an allegory about transness and childhood and sibling death (and sororicide but we don't have time to unpack all that). i don't plan on ever explicitly referring to the characters by their deadname in the narration, except maybe in an ironic tone, but i think it would be cool to sort of sprinkle in references as subtext to just give the readers something more to chew on.

the thing is i've seen posts around talking about how nice it is to make trans characters/headcanons without once considering their deadnames, or how weird it is for people to consider them, and i definitely agree with the sentiment; one of the biggest goals for many trans people is for their past selves to be completely irrelevant, and i feel a bit guilty for perpetuating something so painful for the general community.

but i still don't think i'm an asshole in any way since these are literally just characters and obviously i'm not going around talking about real people's deadnames or anything. i just don't want to make people uncomfortable/trigger dysphoria if they find someone talking about deadnames for a trans charactsr they're attached to (i've definitely had that happen myself when reading trans fics, enough that i had to stop reading, and i don't know how you'd even tag for something like that). if the general gut reaction to this ask is negative then i'll probably consider just not talking about the deadnames unless someone asks about it, since they're not crucial to the plot at all, just some uhh not so fun tidbits.

anyway sorry this is so long for something i feel like might be a non-issue that i'm overthinking. if you somehow guessed the fandom have a chocolate 🫀 if you're one of my few mutuals who knows who i am from the details of the au then um pretend you didnt see this post.

What are these acronyms?

[writingwhileblvck]

Hi I have a request. Could u pls do a short fic where an pre op MTF is making breakfast early in the morning in a lingerie thong and bra and bakugo comes up behind her and starts to touch her curves and breast pulling up her panties by the thong string while kissing her neck.

if u think this is too short you can add onto it or not. But thanks for giving space for trans readers 😇

yes of course! I hope you enjoy!

What a Surprise

Pairing: ProHero!Bakugou x MTF reader

It's been a tough week for your husband. Between long hours at the agency filling out paperwork, and villains just seeming to be coming out the woodwork, you've barley seen him. And oh how you've missed him. Fortunately for the both of you though, he's finally gotten some time off. So you decided that now would be the best time to give your man a little gift for all his hard work.

Since Bakugou went running every morning, it gave you plenty of time to shower, and put on the new lingerie set he bought you. You loved it because the lacey fabric made you look so delicate. It hugged your hips just right, your tits looked so suckable, and the thong panties were your favorite part cause they made your ass look juicy. You topped off the look with a pretty little see through robe, the wrapping paper for your... Gift. You drapped it over your shoulders and checked yourself out in the mirror.

This man was gonna devour you, okay?

So you make your way down into the kitchen to make you and your husband some breakfast while you wait for him to get home. As your chopping you hear the front door open, your heart was pounding with excitement as the footsteps got closer and closer.

"Holy fuck~" your husbands deep rasp filled the kitchen. He makes his way over to you and you jumped a little feeling a firm slap to your ass.

"You are such a fucking tease" you giggle a bit as he wrapped his strong arms around you.

"Well I wanted to surprise you" you say as you feel his warm lips against your neck, his touch turning you to putty. You feel his hands run up and down your skin, kneading your soft breast, gripping and pulling on every curve, and leaving a sweet burning sensation in its wake.

" and what a surprise it is, baby" he coos, pausing just long enough to spin you around to face him. His large hands continue to explore. He slid them up the curve of your ass, the fabric of the robe pooling around his arms as he did. He squeezed and spanked until your cheeks were red. Then he toyed with band of your thong pulling it higher and higher, watching you squirm from the friction. He loved how sensitive you were.

Then he stopped, folding his arms across his broad chest as he studied you.

"Strip for me. now. But leave the panties, there gonna look real pretty when my dick is inside you." he said with a smirk

God you loved this man, the way he spoke to you fogged your mind. All you could think about was his touch as let the robe slide off your arms to the floor. Slowly you unclipped your bra, the cool air making your nipples harden. Once you were done he sauntered up to you, gently gripping your chin to make you look at him.

"That's my good little slut, now I want you to go upstairs and wait for me. I'll Be up there in a second." He said with one final smack to your ass.

You could feel your husbands burning hot gaze as you slowly walked off. The excitement was bubbling inside of you at the thought of all the unholy things he was about to do to you.

Today was gonna be fun.

[jaquik]

Hi, I'm writing some Ranma 1/2 fanfiction

I suppose I might as well put this here too.

Hello, my name is Jaqui. I'm a transwoman and I'm a fan of Ranma 1/2 (I suppose that's redundant). I first read fanfiction for Ranma in the early 2000s while I was still firmly an egg. Then, in May 2020, a couple of years after I came out, I got back into it thanks to AO3. I devoured as many fics as I could and started to meet people on twitter and discord that were also into Ranma. Eventually, in early 2021, I finally decided to take a shot at writing my own fics. Now I find myself currently at 10 stories and counting. If you are interested, you can find my fics on AO3.

I also have commissioned several pieces of artwork for my fics, done by the fantastic writer and artist Fern Bedek, some of which are included below. You can find more of her work and commission her for you own stuff at https://beedokart.tumblr.com/

Finding Oneself (https://archiveofourown.org/works/29627430)

Akane is feeling down after the failed wedding, so Ranma (who is currently figuring things out about herself) offers to take her on a girls day out.

My very first fic, a post-canon story inspired by the common yuri staple of the two girls spending the day together on a definitely not date. While trying to figure out how to set up Ranma making the suggestion in the first place, I ended up breaking her egg wide open in the first chapter. Not much of a slow burn there. I still think I did well with the story and am glad my first attempt at writing my own thing was positively received.

Mothers and Daughters (https://archiveofourown.org/series/3412471)

What if Nodoka had some additional information before her first visit to the Tendo household? And what other secrets may she be hiding?

My first attempt at an AU. Basically, I wanted to try my own alternate take at Nodoka's first meeting where she realizes who Ranma is right away and is also completely accepting of her child. While working out the details for why she knew, I came up with a twist that seemed to throw everyone by surprise and let me take some interesting directions with Nodoka's past.

Genderfluid Mechanics (https://archiveofourown.org/series/3285123)

Taking things from the top with an extra twist: What if the youngest Tendo had a little something extra in common with Ranma.

Another AU, this time with Ranma and Akane's first meeting. I decided to explore what it would be like if both of them were actually genderfluid. Also my first time writing a story purely from one person's point of view.

A Butterfly's Wing (https://archiveofourown.org/works/38048443)

Ranma is given a chance to change one event from his past, and now is left wondering what the change actually was. As well as what surprise is in store for her next.

This time, I went a little further with the AU concept by having the character know they are in an alternate universe. This is my own stab at the 'character makes a wish and now things are different' subgenre. This has given me a chance to explore a bit of mystery writing, seeing what hints to give to guide readers as to what actually happened in this alternate universe.

An Honorable Lie (https://archiveofourown.org/works/42611670)

Shortly after her first meeting at the Tendo house, Nodoka has a realization about the girl named Ranko. Now she is ready to reunite with her child …as soon as she can figure out how to honorably deal with the contract hanging over both their heads.

Artwork done by the amazing Mariana Nicoleli

Another retake on Nodoka's first meeting. This time, she realizes who Ranko is a little later after already revealing the whole contract thing. While she's accepting of her trans daughter (as far as she knows), she feels she cannot reveal it out of fear that she would have to enforce that contract. This one is from Nodoka's POV and it's been fun trying to gauge her thought processes.

Musabetsu Kakutō Ryū Tenka'ichi Budōkai (https://archiveofourown.org/works/43678938)

Roshi ends up with a new student along with Goku and Kuririn. How will this strange gender switching martial artist affect things at the upcoming tournament?

First stab at a crossover, this one with Dragonball. A difficult thing with mixing these franchises is how to deal with power gaps. My solution was to go back to the beginning, as in the 21st tournament. At this point Goku, while very strong, was still quite beatable by regular humans. This also gave me the chance to play around some more with gender (Anyone order an agender Goku? Cause you're getting one).

Secrets and Truths (https://archiveofourown.org/works/43993947)

Akane has a secret meeting with a certain rival. Where they can openly discuss things that they cannot divulge to anyone else.

A chance to play around with Kodachi a bit, along with having her interact with Akane. I couldn't help but notice they shared a blind spot around not noticing someone's curse, albeit a different person each, so I decided to make a little twist on it.

Cute As A Pig (https://archiveofourown.org/works/45134467)

Akane makes a comment that Ranma does not take well. Will a certain sumo pig raising farm girl be able to clear everything up?

Inspired by this lovely art piece (https://www.tumblr.com/ylvasart/708079407910223872), I decided to explore what would happen if Akane and Akari were girlfriends before Ranma showed up, and what would happen to Ranma because of this. Being me, it naturally ended up very trans and lesbian.

The Wild Wind And The Scarlet Sea (https://archiveofourown.org/works/48352432)

What exactly did happen in the pasts of Haruka and Michiru? And how are those pasts connected to a certain pigtailed martial artist and their tomboy fiancée? A lot more than you might think it turns out.

Another crossover and my first attempt at a fuku fic. For this one, I set about making Ranma as Sailor Uranus, something I haven't really seen done before, which is very odd to me. Uranus is described as being both a man and a woman and Ranma and Uranus both utilize wind based attacks. So, this is my stab at writing it.

Dear Diary (https://archiveofourown.org/works/50489872)

A secret, hidden away diary, containing a single entry, written by a girl who no longer exists.

Based on the probably most well-known anime episode Am I Pretty, this was a chance for me to play around with formatting by trying to match the style of a teenage girl writing things down in a physical diary to a digital page.

So, if any of these stories have managed to pique your interest, please check them out and I hope you enjoy them.

[orcelito]

orcelito's trigun fic recs!

making this for @trigunfanfic's fic appreciation week! this is a nonexhaustive list & not in any particular order (aside from the smut fics, which i separated into another section). just a few fics i rly love & think should get more attention!!

so Here are the multichapters (some of which have smut, but it's not the focus):

someone to last your whole life by catchatter / @needlab7

this one is sooooooooooooooooooooooo 🥺 i was reading it as it was being released and MAN it drove me insane. every bit of the post-trimax love and healing i couldve ever wanted. genuinely one of my fav trigun fics. it's just so well written & evocative. it really does feel like Vash and Wolfwood... and just. aughghghgh im gonna have to reread it sometime bc it truly is something special

CAUSE OF DEATH (See instructions and examples) by neatrogenous / @floofyfluff

this is the other post-trimax fic that Changed My Life. i read it all in one go in one euphoric hyperfocus. i felt every emotion known to mankind. it is just. slkdfjsldfjlskdfj god. i adore how Vash is written here. both of them, really. it just feels so much like them. someday, i will reread this one Too...

Make it to Daybreak by @hypermoyashi (on both ao3 and tumblr)

god. what to say about this one. honestly i have never watched Demon Slayer so going into this fic i was missing that context, but i never felt like i was actually missing out on much. Allen does such a fantastic job at bringing u into the world without having to know anything about it at all. i LOOOOVE demon vash sooo much. so very much. im a little behind on updates rn sldfsdfkj but im excited to catch back up bc everything about this au is just Sooooo fun. everyone potentially interested in Demon Vash should read this. Do it. Right Now. 🥺 pls

Trillium and Ivy by @shastafirecracker (on both ao3 and tumblr)

AUGHHHHHH omfg this one was one of the first fics i read for trigun, and MAN it really set a high bar for me. im a little picky when it comes to modern aus, but this one is just so.... WONDERFUL... i read the entire thing in the first half of my day one day and spent the rest of my day in a fugue state. it was just SO SO SO good. i recently reread it and even having read it before, it was just as wonderful to read. realistic relationship development, compelling Saverem drama, all of it. it's also probably my favorite fic for the depiction of Vash's injury & recovery. the first time i read it i was just blown away by how realistic it felt, right down to the trauma memories of watching bargain bin movies while he was stuck in bed. honestly i could rant for forever about this one lol. it truly is special.

and RELATED TO THAT,,,

Wildflowers, also by ShastaFirecracker

i actually didnt know these 2 fics were written by the same person at first lol. Wildflowers got linked in my trigun server & i checked it out bc Fuck Yeah trans wolfwood. and then had my world just blown away. it's SUCH a good fic, & i really am such a sucker for fantasy au. and i was just absolutely gushing about how realistic the depiction of trans wolfwood was even before i finished the fic. SUCH a great fic. so imagine my surprise & delight when i went back to reread Trillium and Ivy and realized -- OH FUCK, it's by the SAME PERSON !!! such beautiful writing, For Real. i really do love these 2 fics.

Sun, Moon, and Stars by tragic_unpaired_electron (can't find a tumblr link on the fic or ao3 profile, so if anyone knows them feel free to share this with them pls !!)

WOW LOOK it's a fic that doesnt have VW as the main focus!!! unfortunately the only one of those on this list (i May be a tad predictable...), & it really earned its place here. it's just such a fascinating fic that answers the question of What If Tesla Survived? i adore the exploration of her strengths and struggles, as well as her sibling relationship with Knives and Vash. it's so INTERESTING, and it gets into the meat of fighting for the rights of Independent Plants (and plants in general) and just. man. i read this and wanted to devote my life to one Tesla Saverem. she is so precious and hard-headed and SUCH a good big sister. pls do read it, it's such a lovely fic

and NOW...

onto the smut fics lol.

there are Plenty of very good smut fics around, but these are the ones that really stuck with me. either for being Different than the norm, or just being very... well. ya kno lol.

dont worry about the picture this paints of me lmfaoooo

you'll never get enough by tagteamme / @phaltu

AGHHHHHHHHH oh my god this fic made me FEEL things. it's a boxer / gym au, and MAN does it do it well. u get the sweaty gym setting, u get the homoeroticism & horny pining, u get the blatant masochism that drives them both... im just obsessed with it. that stove scene is going to stay with me For Life. & the smut is of course VERY good, but the Vibes... oh the Vibes are so impeccable. obsessed.

there is a season for all things by SolidShrimp (cant find their tumblr on the fic/profile, but i Know ive seen them on tumblr 🤔 if anyone knows their url, pls do me a favor and send this to them!)

THIS ONE.......................... man. man. man. man. like i know xeno is The Average for fandom vash, except the normal flower "plantussy" doesnt really do much for me. im too much of a monster fucker for that i guess. it's not BAD, just not particularly exciting. this, though? now, THIS one left an impression. ive already gushed about it to the writer in the comments of the first fic (havent kept up with the sequel fics, tho i really should catch back up sometime) so i'll keep it brief here. just. such an UTTERLY delightful inhuman vash portrayal, to the point where his reproductive biology is just plain incompatible with Wolfwood & Meryl's (oh yeah, it's mashwood, which is WONDERFUL...). wolfwood and meryl are in over their head trying to figure out how to get vash off in his own way, but they do their Absolute Best!!! it's just rly sweet and i adore the way the writer went Full Ham into the inhuman aspects. utterly delightful.

Kick me once again, and say we'll never part by epsilontauri (doesn't look like they're on tumblr? there's just a link to their twitter on the fic. but if anyone knows them, feel free to send this to them!)

this one is. so. very. AUGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH. ok i will be honest this is probably my favorite vw smut. and it's barely even smut. the sequel is definitely much more sex, but this one is. well. it's some extreme, dangerous, and barely negotiated S&M. as the saying goes, it's neither Safe Or Sane, but it sure is consensual! it's just so. well looking at just the tags sure does reveal it. horrible coping, it's an intense fic, but it's just so.......... DELIGHTFUL........... i really really really love fics that stick to their guns like this. and i love how even though Wolfwood had a GREAT time, we get to see how it kinda freaked Vash out (he did Not like hurting Wolfwood), so the sequel is good for a fic where they're both genuinely having lots of fun. this one is actually rather not fun for Vash. but it's just. it's about the Extremity of it. the Possessiveness. pushing someone to their absolute limits!!!!!!!!! this is another fic that i rambled in the comments about bc. yeah. yeah. it's. just trust me. if ur into fucked up dudes being fucked up dudes, this is the fic for you.

& OKAY i think that's my list. again, it's nonexhaustive, but ive had enough typing i think lol

hope u guys enjoy the recs 🥺

[sunbunnyyy]

So I just saw your tags on the Mo Xuanyu art I reblogged - please talk Mo Xuanyu headcanons to me!

(I saw fanart with him and Jgy the other day and I'm like actual Mo Xuanyu is not explored enough. I need more of him)

Thank you ♡

hello friend!!! sorry I’m getting to this after so many days have passed—obligatory work life etc commitments that left me drained and not ready to answer!

I’ll list my biggest headcanons—I’ll admit that I haven’t explored him as much as I’d like, but these are the things I take into every scenario regarding him!

1. Mo Xuanyu is trans!

There’s something a little bit tragic to me about the way gender is handled in Ye Olde Ancient Societies. As much as I love what The Untamed did as far as removing some of the perceived gender biases of MDZS (such as female cultivators being Kept Apart in Cloud Recesses and showing us maybe?? one? female sect leader?) I do love playing around with two types of characters—those I can shoot with my “trans laser beam,” and tragic ones.

My specific headcanon for Mo Xuanyu (which gets explained in wi3!) is that his mother was told if her child was a girl, she would not be acknowledged and Second Madam Mo would be cast aside. Knowing what that would mean not only for herself but for her child, she raised Mo Xuanyu as a boy, and it wasn’t discovered until much later by a certain Jin that the truth was revealed. For his part, Mo Xuanyu never felt like a girl, and never wanted to portray himself as one.

I think Mo Xuanyu being trans also adds a fun little layer of struggle to Wei Wuxian’s return—he went from a cis man to a trans man and suddenly has to deal with that dysphoria, too.

2. Mo Xuanyu is a little crazy, but not the way he’s described in the books.

This is another thing that comes up in wi3–Mo Xuanyu’s mental health vs. his intelligence!

While Mo Xuanyu never thought twice about being a boy, it sure doesn’t change the dysphoria of being told you’re something that your body doesn’t reflect! Not only that, but the poor treatment from the Mo family against him and his mother that I can’t believe didn’t happen in the ten years between when Jin Guangshan abandoned him and when he brought Mo Xuanyu to Carp Tower? During such formative years, it’s not a wonder to me that Mo Xuanyu’s not quite all there.

(I resonate a little with this headcanon. Okay, I resonate with this headcanon a lot, actually.)

But! I don’t think Mo Xuanyu’s unintelligent. The opposite, actually—I think he’s very intelligent, although not quite as smart and calculating as our boy Jin Guangyao. Because of the treatment at the hands of the Mo family, I don’t think Mo Xuanyu’s mother was healthy enough to have as much of a hand in Mo Xuanyu’s life as Meng Shi did with Jin Guangyao, but he was a young master of an affluential family who were under the belief that Jin Guangshan could, at any point, come back and claim Mo Xuanyu like he said he would. They would’ve given him at least some education, because it wouldn’t have reflected well on them had they not. And, given that they were an affluential family—they have a Manor and a Village, after all—they likely could’ve afforded much better learning materials than Meng Shi (who did her best!).

3. The Incest.

The allegations that Mo Xuanyu came into Jin Guangyao and whether or not they’re true are such an interesting thing to play around with in my brain.

I think this aspect for me will vary greatly depending on what I’m writing. They may be true in one fic, or completely fabricated in another. Or maybe they’re only slightly true! As mentioned previously, Mo Xuanyu isn’t quite in full control of his cognitive thought processes. I’m not sure if I read it as a headcanon or part of canon or one of mxtx’s interviews or even a different fanfic or the wiki, but I read somewhere that Jin Guangyao was actually quite kind to his half brother, despite the pointed way with which Jin Guangshan brought him around as a way to bully Jin Guangyao. I think that would have a very lasting effect on Mo Xuanyu, who likely only saw kindness from his mother by that point in his life.

Whether or not Jin Guangyao takes advantage of it… 🤷‍♂️ again, varies on the fic I’m writing, I think!

These are my big three at the moment. I’d love to hear any that you or anyone else might have! I really want to write a modern fic and it’d be fun to have Mo Xuanyu in there being the annoying younger brother to Jin Zixuan and Meng Yao* he deserved to be.

[1000dactyls]

i want to consume your art into my very soul by the way. it’s amazing and you draw them so well!!!

also yeah i love seeing your headcannons and ideas about trans astrid because i feel like we don’t get that a lot in the fandom. it’s very interesting to see how you perceive astrid’s growth as a character from building herself into the most fearsome warrior of her generation and that all being torn down, and how she finally has her girlhood but doesn’t know what to do with it

anyway ty for reading this rambly ask!!

hello i am so sorry for having this sit in my inbox for so long!!!! I really wanted to think of a good response to this ;___; it means a lot that you enjoy my art and how i draw them. I’m still working on aligning the dragon riders’ younger teen selves to how they appear in httyd2, i think, but hopefully drawing more of them will mean that their shape language also begins to come naturally to me…. I HOPE……….

i think trans astrid having 3 fics on ao3 is hugely a shame and the lack of it in the fandom makes me so sad. not that i think a lot of astrid characterizations are the best, anyways… astrid is one of those characters that i think is hard to nail down, in part because canon itself doesn’t really know what to do with her — is she the girl that the hero gets? is she the heart of the team? is she a girlboss? is she a damsel? the series kind of loses itself here trying to answer these questions. but i think the most compelling and consistent narrative about astrid is her coming of age: how she navigates being a member of a community shaped overwhelmingly by loss now faced with sudden abundance

and i think trans astrid in specific is one of the most fun lens you could explore that arc through, in part because you get to explore the httyd-verse with questions like “how are queer people who are not the child of the chief of berk treated” (not that berk, in my head, cares all that much for what bits you’re born with). but if astrid’s most consistent piece of core characterization is her finding her way to adulthood when she hasn’t quite fleshed out what childhood means to her, then giving another layer to her finding out what exactly “girlhood” means in all senses of the word can only be a fruitful experience.

at least, that’s the way i view it! especially since astrid is so much the it girl on berk — except berk’s it girl can’t cook and puts on smudgy dark eye makeup and wears skirts that seem impossible to sit in and reaches up to touch the clouds that always seemed impossible to reach. so in some ways, astrid’s figured out bits and pieces of what girlhood means to her. now she just has to figure out the rest of it

[vaudeville-moggie]

16. 17. 18. 19. 20. 21. 22. 23. 27. 28. 29. 30. 31. 32. 33. 34. 35. 36. 37. 38. 39. 40. (For the tmnt ask thing)

KELP THATS TOO MANY NUMBERS LEE

16.) Rise version of Casey, and her son are the coolest I think but I love them all they're my babies... The one from the 90s films is the hottest tho WHO SAID THAT

17.) I love 1987 shredder he's so sillies dad of two <3

18.) my favourite villain... Hmmmm 2003 had some really well-written villains I think? Baxter Stockman is one of my favs all-round maybe because he's abused a lot and he isn't really able to dig himself out of that... He gets really fucked up in 2003 but he kind of has a redemption in the future? Unfortunately 2003 didn't really explore that and I think it was more put in for laughs...

19.) my fav ally is probably Casey Jones or timothy (not including April because she's more like a main character, idk) or!! Carter, who appears in 1987 and then never again. I miss him 🥺

20.) theme song... I love them all... Rise's is objectionably the best but damn 2003 had some damn good bangers. I could listen to "back to the sewer" on repeat forever.

21.) favourite story arc? Like... Idk, one that appears a lot is the farmhouse arc (or country arc or rural arc whatever) that first appeared in the 90s movie (although it was probably in the comic first) and Leo or Raph is injured, and one sits by the other while they heal... It's a very soft moment for the brothers because they're usually fighting... If Rise gets renewed I'd love to see this arc again.

22.) I wasnt really a pizza eater before TMNT, it's not a big thing in Australia compared to NYC. I LOVE margherita!! Basil and tomato and boom, ya got yourself a pizza. I'll eat any pizza except any pizza with that horrid ham. Or anchovies. (Who does, wtf)

23.) fav TMNT fic dude idk I should read more... Uh tangledinink's teenage mutant what now?

Lots of TMNT fic recs on my side blog pinned post :3

27.) something I love to see in TMNT art/fics? Tails!! Hehe they deserve tails :3 also any references to sci-fi because that's very TMNT coded, it has a long history of star trek references

28.) what is one thing I'd like to see explored more in art/fics? uhmmm idk 🧍‍♂️as long as people are having fun idc... Maybe villain redemption? Like they did that in rise with draxum canonly so...

29.) what is one headcanon that I have? Uhmmm trans Leo I mean, always... Always.

30.) idk of any common headcanons that I reject... Every headcanon I've seen I've gone like, yeah, I can see that. Might not fully incorporate it into my headcanons but I've never blocked a headcanon or cringed at anything...

31.) one piece of TMNT canon that I dislike/ignore? Say it with me folks: Donnie's crush on April

32.) uhmm idk lol I think I got into it with rise so my first thing would be the thing I just redrew here the original being here

33.) my favourite thing I've made??? idk. I really like the pokemon au I haven't posted about at all and this!!:

only piece of my art on mah wall

34.) what character do i draw/write most often? it might... be mikey? idk... i think I draw them all evenly but i'd predict if you went through an actually counted out of the things I've posted, it would maybe be mikey.

35.) which character relationships are my fav to write/draw? idk I really like how mikey interracts with his brothers and sister(s) which is something I've found I enjoy playing with in my magic au... but I'm literally always drawing rise leo and yuichi usagi together in my tmnt sketchbook so

36.) which character I have the hardest time writing/drawing? Rise Raph for BOTH... sigh, I think I'm definitely better at drawing him than I was, but I've got a lot of practise to do. and in terms of writing, hes a very multi-faceted character and while he's the big brother and he has to responsible, he's also a kid and he can be silly and fun too...

37.) I write/draw multiple iterations of tmnt, but so far I've kind of only posted rise and 2012 drawings so...?

38.) Do you generally stick close to canon, or diverge from it?

my first instinct when writing fics is to make it canon-compliant... but I've made Aus too, so, both?

39.) Do you have any TMNT OCs?

ya, Jim (general tmnt sona or oc, and was my fursona for a bit) and this bat yokai oc I've only drawn like once, her name was ghost I think. I've also made an Usagi character for magic au 2012 leo... spoilers teehee

40.) Do you give the turtles tails? YES OFC!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! unless I forget teehee

YAY!! happy 40 years TMNT!!!!

[bartholomew-junior]

23 25 26... hmm. maybe sips ANd erina And gothi (unless you dont feel like that feel free to just choose one of them cause. 6 entire different answers to think) <3<3

EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE thank u circular 4 ur boon of kindness. it is appreciated. apologies for the wait, as i had to let the ideas for this ripen be4 properly answering. i’m gonna start the first ask off with gothi from ep.10.

first of all, i just love her mask and am permanently sad that she never gets to wear it again. bonus for foreshadowing face reveal a few episodes down the line and making her an incredibly ominous cryptid like presence kind of. i just think she’s neat. next is erina in ep.32:

honestly i was really tempted to use a frame from when she was xanu possessed cuz it looked real fuckin cool, but i think this one’s more meaningful. she’s sympathizing with sips for once instead of trying to one up him (at least after a bit) and realizing how tough shit must’ve been for him. agh they make me insane. next is sips from ep.15:

from right after he ate bou claire’s heart. the buildup narration to him looking into the mirror is, ,, agghhh. the fact this was used to promo merch is funny also.

now for q. 25: technically, my first impression of gothi was her getting sips to do karaoke while drunk (lol) and that being the catalyst for EVERYTHING (this campaign is the equivalent of a snowball rolling down a hill). but now, it was her kind of managing and trying to quell sips’ anger best she could along with erina.

erina was just a memelord to me lol. sips wasn’t in the best condition the first few episodes, so my first impression was just that he was a bottomless pit of rage. now looking at the early episodes feels like looking at alpha minecraft in comparison to 1.21, especially without xanu or abby. sneeze was just a little guy.

ok freebie question time. i’m gonna pick q. 22 even tho there hasn’t been a new fic at all on ao3 since i updated my own fic (which makes sense considering we’ve kinda already met the goal of the series even if there’s a lot of stuff on the horizon). and i’ll pick all 3 of them + xanu for this cuz. why not

sips: a lot of the fics on ao3 4 this fandom are oneshots, so there isn’t much they’re able to explore if they’re low word counts, but my dream sips-centric fic would be like. a collection of missed/deleted scenes from his early life and time in ammurin with a kind of dream/void/death motif. bonus points if he’s trans

erina: i haven’t seen ANYTHING about her early life in kylandria being the child of busy royal entertainers, hell even her weapons are like a carnival trick, so i’d really like to see a bit of early life stuff again. are you sensing a trend. also her just dealing with royalty is fun and i have many ideas

gothi: early life again. listen she was a whole ass princess who was allowed to exist only because of her rank she was under so much pressure all of the time, especially with being buddies with xanu. did she ever talk to another defective foreclaimer. who are her parents. did they love her. ugh. also, seeing her interact with vicky is something i haven’t really seen before, so that’d be fun.

xanu: listen. i feel like he’d be the hermit on the high mountain type never interacting with anyone like thanos after killing half the universe. also, i feel like a lot of aspects of his character get discarded in favor of making him easier to digest and write, which i’ve done, and this does not do him any service. i think making all the fools gold cast kind of,, mlp headcanon designified is also fun and i want to do it. also bonus vicky

in conclusion: thank u circular <3333333 :]] :), i hope this isn’t miserably long. i’ve been all worded out for the day. do u ever think abt how vicky and sips are parallels and

[thestobingirlie]

Saw someone like. Enraged by what I can only assume was your post about transfem Stevie and the possibility of romantic stobin. It's kinda weird because clearly the majority of people headcanoning Steve as transfem are not doing it to ship stobin? It's a semi-popular interpretation of the character, which obviously can be done poorly but is usually fine. and just because I love and adore platonic stobin, doesn't mean there isn't any possibility of it becoming romantic if Steve were a girl, or that it wouldn't be interesting to explore that, which is what most fanfiction is. "What if blank?". Calling it idk unkind or whatever they did when literally you were pointing out something about fandom is uncharitable. there's such a wide range of interpretations and depictions of these different relations that claiming no one outside a certain group should be able to explore that is silly. People interpret platonic stobin so differently in fandom that it could be a different relationship. As though many people don't ship variations of the party together but still hold their platonic friendships dearly.

yeah, a lot of people seem to think i was saying that they have to ship transfem stevie with robin or they’re a transphobe. when really all i was saying that the people writing robin as feeling disgusted and sickened by the idea of feeling any form of attraction to stevie should think a little about why they’re writing it that way.

like, there aren’t any stevie and robin fics (i don’t think?), so clearly no one’s transitioning steve just for romantic stobin, but the way some people write their relationship in steddie fics with stevie is weird and uncomfortable. and is what prompted me to make the post.

the irony is i’m not really even that into transfem stevie, but i’ve seen so many transphobic takes on her that it’s actually painful.

obviously i don’t think everyone has to believe that stevie and robin might be romantic, or that they’re automatically terrible people for preferring platonic friendships (i prefer platonic to romantic!!), i just think if people are writing a trans stevie fic, they should examine the way they’re writing her a little more.

like you said, fandom is for exploration, ‘what if’ scenarios. unpicking and diving into characters and relationships, and having fun! but it’s also really easy to start regurgitating popular fandom hcs and not realise how problematic they may be. and i think we should just all be aware of the tropes we’re writing, and how we’re writing them.

[petalkitshadow]

I haven’t read anything about this au other than the fic itself, so I had no idea Applekit and Eeltail were trans! I love the culture you’ve given RiverClan, with the influence of Riverstar having made them diverse compared to ThunderClan. It’s so cool! I hope Appledusk gets walloped so hard that Mapleshade manages to kill his body and his spirit in one fell swoop and he doesn’t even get to experience an afterlife.

heheh I think some people may have picked up on Applekit/Applefrost being trans, since he's described as a tom by word-of-god, but I initially described him as a she-cat! Or maybe not, since Applefrost, Willownose, and Shyheart never appear on-page, and are only named in the family tree, and some people didn't even know they were canon characters haha

And Eeltail, I wanted to bring it up in the story eventually. I always pictured her taking the foster-queen role because she's unable to have kits herself, but really likes caring for them and along with it being fulfilling and enjoyable, helps her feel assured in herself as a she-cat. AND it provides a good support network for cats like Darkstar, who didn't want kits, or Reedshine, who wanted to be a mentor alongside raising her kits. But she's not a full-time queen, she likes being a warrior too, when there's no kits to be cared for! I really love Eeltail, she's grown to be one of my favorites as I write. I low-key kinda ship her with Reedshine... I could see the two maybe having crushes on each other as apprentices, and there's still some lingering affection from that. (they're the ultimate bi4bi femme couple)

I also wanted to add some contrast between ThunderClan and RiverClan!! Petalpaw's lived in RC longer than she was in TC, but her super early moons spent in TC still really set the tone for what she expects haha. I see Oakstar's ThunderClan as a very utilitarian society. You get up, you eat, you work, you go back to bed, you repeat. This is a result of Oakstar and his predecessors, Seedstar and Redstar, who I imagine cracked down hard on Making ThunderClan Strong after Morningstar's feeble borders causing famine. Overall, the culture is very conservative and xenophobic! (But that's not to say all ThunderClan cats agree with this - I will be exploring it more in my FreckleFic, how the TC cats cope with living in such a strict society)

Meanwhile, RiverClan is a more generous, "relaxed" society - they have ample food, usually even in leafbare. They've managed to hold on to Riverstar's original mission, which was to provide a home for cats of all kinds. Thunderclan would consider them indulgent and lazy - RiverClan cats love things that are fun and beautiful. They think there's more to life than just the bare necessities. even things that ARE required, they like to take the extra time to make it beautiful, like their nests and dens. They're also more accepting of cats being queer - though this is a bit generational, as the elders are still iffy on it.

And oh yes, Appledusk will get his just desserts. But how will Mapleshade's Vengeance vary from canon? We'll just have to wait and see. Well, I don't have to wait. I already know what happens. But the rest of you gotta sit tight while i write it! Thanks so much for reading my fic, so glad you enjoyed it <3

[practically-an-x-man]

Talk Shop Tuesday for creating Quinn? (If you haven’t answered already!)

Thank you!!!

Talk Shop Tuesday, and a link to Quinn's OC bio here

Long ramble ahead... they're a fun one :D

I actually created Quinn while writing my other 6 Underground fic, Nom De Guerre. I enjoyed writing that story and that OC, AJ, but partway through I got to thinking about a character who, rather than meeting the Ghosts during a mission, knew one of the characters before they joined the Ghosts and had a reunion after the fact.

Naturally, this character had to be Billy. He's my favorite, and his backstory as a parkourist who fell in a botched mission was just too good to pass up.

The base idea for Quinn as a character was this: they both fell in the botched job, but Billy got lucky and she didn't.

As with most of my characters, the rest of the details came... well, not exactly at random, but I picked them based on what felt right and seemed interesting to explore. She's punk because that seemed like a fun character design, and it's rare that I see genuine hardcore punks represented in fiction. She's a non-op trans woman for the same reason - it gives depth to her story, and I've worked hard to convey it as accurately and respectfully as I can, but it began with the understanding that characters like Quinn rarely get the chance to be protagonists.

I tend to see a lot of "everyman" OCs, particularly in fanfiction, and that's just not my style. For one thing, that's just not interesting to read, let alone to write. And for another, that "everyman" idea is typically based on this super heteronormative, cis-normative, white Western-focused idea of what makes a "default" character, and that's ignorant if not outright damaging to the millions of people who don't fit that mold. I don't want to make a character that some blank-faced Western suburban audience can project onto, I want to make a character that compels the audience to their story. That's not specific to Quinn, but it is a lot of what went into her story.

Once I decided how Quinn's fall would affect her, I did a lot of research into the medical side of things in an effort to portray it as accurately as I could. I looked into the physical side of things, like the specific damage that occurred to her body, but I also looked into a lot of personal stories from people with similar disabilities. I found blogs talking about mobility issues, the proper ways to depict crutches, canes, and other mobility devices, and descriptions of the various types of hallucinations from people who experience them regularly.

The one thing I've found that didn't exactly line up about her story is that traumatic head wounds aren't known to cause lasting hallucinations like what she experiences, but the brain is a complicated machine and it's very possible that Quinn had a latent schizotypal disorder that was expressed after the head wound. Uncommon, but not impossible - and isn't that all you really need from fiction? It's more realistic than House MD, at least XD

Quinn's experience with her disabilities is an interesting one to write. In some ways, her experience is very different from my own - her physical injuries are more severe, she regularly uses mobility aids, and I've never experienced hallucinations like she does. But in other respects, I do pull from my own life when I write her - I have congenital joint problems that do cause me pain and difficulty and a lot of Quinn's emotional responses to those issues are reflections of my own, and I have experienced some small sensory disturbances from time to time (particularly when I'm sleep-deprived).

And like Quinn, I was a very active person (martial arts, American Ninja Warrior training, etc.) and I still struggle with the idea that I've already lost some physical mobility and will continue to lose more as time goes on. I'm still a very active person and I work hard to try and keep my body in good shape while I can, but there's only so much I can do and it's tough to come to terms with that.

Quinn as a character is a bit of a journal for me. Her being transgender and struggling to feel like she'll be known and accepted and loved by the people around her, her experiences with disability and trying to accept that she is limited, and her being punk and the social judgement that comes with that, all of that are things that I experience and I work through those feelings by writing them out in Quinn's story. It takes a different shape in her than it does myself, but the intent and emotion behind it is the same, and it ends in some of the most raw and emotional scenes I've written.

Thank you so much for the ask!! I really appreciate you asking about my different OCs, and Quinn's story especially is one of my favorites!

[fanonical]

Hi. I literally put in "transfem link" into the search and you were the first to come up. I've been going through your entire trans Hyrule tag and I'm loving it all! I can't wait to read the fic.

This also reminded me of my time playing breath of the wild. A couple years after I finished it I discovered how to mod the game. The first thing I did was download the female link mod. It changed the model, voice, and even text to she/her. But it didn't change the link model for the flashbacks. But it also kept the new pronouns. So I came up with a story in my head about it just being Link at the start of her transition. I liked to think that Mipha, with her healing powers, could probably do something similar to magic hormone therapy for link. After all, Mipha was going to propose to link, and I thought her helping her partner through her journey was amazing.

Anyway I know that was long but I wanted to share. I'm actually trans and growing up with how androgynous link is normally portrayed and then finding that mod really helped me discover who I was. So reading through your tag just brought me back to those happy memories. I'm really looking forward to reading your fic. And thank you for bringing me back to those times.

aw, thank you! i'm so glad that so many other trans people have similar relationships to Link as a character -- i've gotten a lot of similar asks like this from trans guys too saying that my AU feels empowering to them even though they see Link as a trans guy, and i'm so glad that i'm having THAT effect too, like it makes me so happy that trans people across the spectrum are finding fun in my transfem Link au stuff, especially when i haven't even WRITTEN anything yet!

also glad to hear people are finding me from the tag!!! the more people who positively respond to my #trans hyrule stuff, the easier it will be for me to write more, and the faster i will write it -- it just motivates me that much.

i like your idea about Mipha, i'd never considered transition through healing magic! maybe that's something i could explore in my fic to a degree.... 🤔

[spectralquartzafterdark]

In the Rosie Megatron interfacing fic you mentioned something about her body being similar to the cybertronians. What did you mean is she trans or???? I'm curious because I've not read that sort of thing in such a normal context.

Rosie here to answer this because I didn't expect people to pick up on that particular little line. But, no she's not trans! She's intersexed. Specifically she has an "undetermined" intersexed condition. Putting this under the cut. She is based on myself and is a self insert so take this as a small peak into my life as well.

While it could fall under 46 XX due to how her enlarged her clitoris is and the fact her reproductive system is functional. But, like myself there's two weird twists in this that have had my Dr's say I fall into undetermined. So, that's where I put her too!

I have a Y chromosome and my adrenals over produce cortisol and hormones not under produce. But everything else falls into the 46 XX because of the physical appearance (at least for Rosie. The doctors fixed my parts to look normal and did so without my mother's consent and it has caused issues. Scar tissue down there hurts if you know you know.) And the fact her reproductive system functions normally inspite of endo and pcos.

So, when Megatron first saw her naked he was delighted to see her array was similar to a standard mech. He didn't have to do guess work he knew how to take care of her. And he is appalled when Rosie reveals that her array has uh been questioned in a not so fun way. Megatron deeply enjoys it and makes sure she knows her body isn't some weird thing to be ashamed of.

I don't see a lot of casual intersexed characters so when making Rosie I decided to make sure she got to keep her differences. Even if its not super explicit. And this sort of this is why I think self inserts should be normalized. It allows us to explore more personal aspects of ourselves and even write about things we normally wouldn't.

I was unlucky with what happened to me. Rosie in writing gets to keep her autonomy.

If you want more info on the common intersexed conditions here are two links.

https://medlineplus.gov/ency/article/001669.htm

https://interactadvocates.org/intersex-definitions/

And since this was a heavy topic here's a funny thing I've been told. Apparently when I was first born and grandma saw me she said, "OH wow she was almost born a boy! Are we sure shes not?" That's how different I looked in comparison to a "normal" AFAB baby lmao.

[monty-glasses-roxy]

Anyway. Fun thing while I'm still stuck in brain fog land.

Trans Femme Freddy from a while back. Ya know, Francine Fazbear? Now that I like to give Freddy and Roxy a 'fuck you. FUCK YOU TOO' kind of relationship, there's some new layers to Francine to explore.

My Roxy is trans. She has a fun gender, and she does what she likes. She is not male or female, she's not a man or a woman, she's not a secret third thing, she's just Roxy. That's it. She has problems with the gendered aspects of her body, and if she's able to change that? She's very well supported and is clearly over the moon about it.

She said she liked any pronouns, but still favoured she/her and there was no name change. She didn't want any of that! She's always been Roxy! She just gets to decide what that looks like now! She can be as masc or as femme or as gender neutral as she wants! She will do whatever she wants and still be Roxy! By the time this stuff happens, she's been dealing with this gender stuff for so long, and understandably, kept the majority of her thoughts and feelings about it all to a very close circle of friends. Of which Freddy is not a part of.

Now, if we take Freddy and sail him down the river towards Francine, in my head, I get something that'd be interesting to explore in a fic of sorts.

After Roxy is free to do whatever she wants with her presentation, and makes a few changes to her body she's wanted, it gets Freddy thinking. He's barely seen the tip of the iceberg of her gender related problems, but now that he really thinks about it, the few issues he did see start to make sense. Truth be told, Freddy has always struggled a lot with his own assigned gender, something he's vaguely expressed to Bonnie and Chica, but never said outright. He never let himself wonder what he could be. He never took the time to really consider what he wanted because it would never be possible. There would be no point. All he knows, is that he's not a boy. He's not a man. He's not a dad or a boyfriend either. Those words just don't fit. A lot of things just don't fit, but there's nothing he can do about it.

But Roxy has just shown him something can be done. He's there in the group as she briefly talks about how she feels about it all, saying that she doesn't know exactly how she wants to present, but that she's got ideas for days and she's ready to see what sticks. He's there when she talks about the various attempts to do something like this before (against Fazbear Entertainment's wishes) that have gone South, and even remembers a few of those instances himself. He'd never understood why she did those things and he'd wondered at the time why she clammed up and gone completely quiet when he confronted her about damages, rule breaking or going against the company. Normally, she would have told him straight away why she'd done something. She was always loud and proud but not in the moments she talks about. Now Freddy gets it. For once, Roxy makes sense to him. He gets it.

And he doesn't like it.

He's staring at himself in the mirror. He's worried, he's nervous, and he keeps thinking about how Roxy did it. How Roxy is happier now. How she said she took her time, went slowly with it and had DJ and the Minis he very rarely sees behind her every step of the way. How Roxy has what Freddy wants but not quite.

He tries not to think too hard about it. Convincing himself that it's still not possible. He's Freddy Fazbear! He can't be anything but Freddy Fazbear! That's just how it is! It's not going to change!

But he keeps thinking. The questions keep coming and the answers aren't there. The words 'boy' and 'boyfriend' and 'man' start sticking more. He can see Roxy getting referred to as a boy sometimes, with he/him pronouns, they/them and even some random ones he's never heard of and he's starting to get so fucking jealous and it spikes every time she smiles after someone uses she/her for her. He wants so badly not to be bothered by any of this, but he is and it's starting to hurt when there's someone right there that might have the answers he's looking for... but fucking hellfire does he hate her. He's painfully aware that feeling is mutual.

He can't just go to Roxy. They're not even allowed to be left alone in the same room together after they got into an actual, physical fight a few years back. The tension has dwindled since then, but it's never left. They still fucking hate each other. That will never change, he's sure.

But no one else has the answers. No one else could possibly have the answers. No one else has done it before. He wants to know what he's feeling is okay. He wants to know that there's an option and he needs someone to be there that understands. But he'd rather die than rely on Roxy, and he's sure she'd rather die than help him. He's certain that out of everyone, she'd be the one to turn him away. He's certain she'd use it as her next backhanded compliment, or ammunition in their next sniping match. Why wouldn't she? She uses everything else against him, and he's just as guilty of it, so he won't ask. He won't say a word. He'll watch, he won't be sad, he won't think about it, and he'll occasionally seethe with frustration and envy right beneath the surface.

Until it's just too much.

Freddy was there when some bigotted parent started shouting. That this gender stuff is a game. It's all a money making scheme. It's all nonsense and it's just a phase. They shouldn't be encouraging any of it! Why can't they just be normal about it? It's making kids believe it's okay to throw their lives away because everyone else is doing it! I mean, what's next? Freddina Fazbearella? He says nothing. For the first time in his life, violence feels like the only good response. The thought scares him, and he does nothing.

Roxy steps in. She laughs in their face with all the confidence in the world and says "Lady, gender is a race and I'm winning. Don't be a sore loser now!" and a few minutes of her taking the abuse with a smirk on her face later, they're removed to the sound of applause. Little kids that had barely paid Roxy any attention before were suddenly enamoured. She's not a boy or a girl?? You can just be anything???? Wow!!! That's so cool!!! Suddenly she has a group of little kids, trading dolls and toy trucks and playing a game called Anything where they can be anyone they want. Chica and Sunny are there now, rallying them to play dress up and have fun with who they are and Freddy just watches on in silence. Little boys in dresses are princesses of the castle, little girls are racing trucks with fake moustaches. Two kids swapped names and shirts. They're all encouraged to try everything and find what they want to be and the game is so full of fun and laughter. He leaves when no one is looking. He has a lot to think about. Is it really that easy?

No, he decides. It's not. That's a simplified version for the kids. Roxy didn't teach them about her issues, or walk them through any feelings. She just taught them to be themselves, like she's always done in her own way. Would she do the same for him? He doesn't think so... but that person's words are on loop in his head. He can't just ignore this anymore. What he felt in that moment wasn't who he is, he can't let it go on like this. So he takes the gamble.

He shows up after hours. She's on the roof of her salon playing her keytar. She's not supposed to be up there... A Mini Music Man alerts her that he's there and he remembers she's territorial. She doesn't like anyone walking in after hours unnanounced. Monty's the same. She sets her keytar aside and leaps down. He can already tell she's angry and he wonders for the millionth time today if he's made a mistake. He hears her growling and demanding to know what he's doing on her turf, she barely tolerates him during the day, and he wants to answer 'Nothing. I am sorry to have bothered you.' but he doesn't. For once he can't say a word. He doesn't know where to start. He's frozen and while he wants to back out, he can't move. She gets louder and he notices the Minis have pretty much vanished. Are they scared too...? She gets closer, gets in his face and asks if he's fucked up his ears or something. She jabs at him and he can't keep the impassive mask in place. He expects her to grab him, to drag him out of her territory like she's done a few dozen times before...

Instead, Roxy pauses. She looks him up and down and takes a few steps back with narrowed eyes. She looks around and suddenly looks uneasy. "You're alone." she says. "I am." he answers. She's expecting the worst, he's sure. A death, or something, perhaps. "Why." It's not even a question. It's a command. It kicks something in his head and suddenly five words spill out of him and he turns his head down to glare at the floor and brace himself for whatever her repsonse may be.

"I am not a boy." He'd said. He's not sure if he wants to cry, melt into the floor or just be happy he's finally said it. There's such a long silence. He's never felt afraid to look before.

"You're not...?" She sounds utterly lost and he shakes his head. Why does she sound like that? Does she not know this feeling? He was certain she would! "Okay... so... w-why are you telling me...? Of all people??" she asks. He looks up and she recoils in shock at what must be a mess of emotion on his face, a far cry from the controlled mask he always wears with her. Never before has he felt so exposed and so afraid of what he's doing.

"What do I do?" He feels like he's almost begging. Perhaps he is. He's been ignoring this for so long, he needs an answer. What does he do now?

Roxy's face falls thoughtful. She leaves him waiting for a while, and for once, he's glad she's taking the time to find her words. She sighs and nods to herself. He's left staring in confusion as she turns and walks towards the salon entrance. She looks back at him after he doesn't move and gestures more pointedly for him to follow. And follow he does. Without a word. She takes him into the back, through a door he noticed behind the shelves before, and into the warmly lit tunnel system of play areas he's never really been in before. They sit in a comfy, surprisingly cosy spot and she starts to talk, or more accurately, starts prompting him to talk.

It's awkward. It's difficult. He's never struggled to articulate himself before but he is now. She doesn't just hear him like she always does. She listens. She nods, and offers comparisons so she can clarify what he's saying and it's like she knows and like she gets it. She tells him that nothing will leave this spot that he doesn't want to take with him and while they've never been close and he's never truly taken the time to know her, he knows she'll keep this promise to the bitter end. Like he knows she always does. She answers when he asks about her own experiences, but noticeably keeps it brief to focus on him. A few things suddenly seem obvious to him, while others still make no sense, and she stops him every time he insists he can't be who he feels he truly is. He fumbles a few times, says he shouldn't be telling her this and she just shrugs and tells him this isn't exactly something she thought she'd be doing either, but now that he's here, she wants to do it. He didn't believe her, but he's still here. And so is she, her full attention on him.

He doesn't get an answer to his question. She can't give him that, he's learned. Yet, he leaves Roxy's territory a little lighter than when he went in. He's learned a lot, about himself and Roxy too. He wonders as he walks if maybe Bonnie rubbed off on her just a little bit. Or maybe she's not as bad as he's always believed she was...

And maybe she's right. If gender is a race, then maybe it's about time he got off the starting line.

[batwynn]

are people still into drarry at this point? as far as i know the entire hp fandom basically died when a certain someone spoke her political opinions. anyone still talking about hp gets harassed to oblivion and so many callout posts pop up saying that if you still like the franchise you're supporting terfs. i honestly don't know how to feel, i'd simply deleted all my hp content on my blog because seeing them just makes me uncomfortable in hindsight :/

So, I wasn't planning on replying to this because I didn't want to hurt anyone by sharing it, or by my reply. It's something that calls for some nuance that I worry I won't be able to explore properly. But I had a thought and I wanted to share it. Trigger warning: Mentions of transphobia, JKR, and suicidal thoughts. Note: This has been tagged for black lists so people can avoid it. Apologies for those in the fandom tags.

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So, I'm trans. That's something I'm always pretty open about online, especially as I haven't had much safe space to be open about it in real life. My transition process has been somewhat public, even if I've been pretty quiet about things in the past few years. If you search my blog, you can probably find the posts where I started exploring my gender around 2016-2017ish. They're posted along side Drarry posts, among other fandoms I was in. You will also find that I stopped posting as much Drarry a few years later, with little correlation to what the author was saying or doing at the time because I wasn't on Twitter and hadn't heard the news yet. I drifted fandoms a bit, then I went on Twitter and... yeah.

Now here's where it gets a bit complicated, and personal. A Drarry fanfiction saved my life because it helped convince me that I could transition. That I could be trans and it was okay. A Drarry fanfic told me I wasn't too old, I wasn't wrong, it's not too late, and it's okay to do the things that make you happy even if you spent half your life doing the things that people told you were right but were wrong for you. I'm not dramatizing this in any way. I read this fanfic when I was in a really bad place, when I was figuring out I was trans and in a horrible relationship with a shitty person and I was scared to death. All I could think was that there was no way out for me. I'm not saying this to guilt anyone for not liking Drarry/Harry Potter. I'm not saying it to defend JKR or any of the things she's made, said, or done. I'm not saying it because I'm a traitor to the trans community or that Harry Potter is even that important to me. I'm saying it because a writer out there wrote a Drarry fanfiction with no intention of it being life saving, and yet they did save my life. They just wanted to create something fun, and meaningful, with two characters from some books. Did it have to be Harry Potter? For them, yes. They read those books and saw more to the characters than JKR ever could, and they gave us a story that is so meaningful and transformative that I literally did the thing JKR hates with her entire bitter, little heart. Because of a person in the fandom. Now, I personally feel a disconnect from those books these days. She's really, truly ruined those memories for me in ways I can't even put into words. Worse even, was seeing that there were bigotries in those books that I was ignorant to, as a child. Things I didn't see because I didn't know. And knowing now that it was always there, the hatred and ugliness, makes the original material poison to me. And god, don't get me started on messy fandom spaces. Don't look towards the Interview With a Vampire fandom at all. It's, unfortunately, a large part of being in a group space with people who like a thing. There will be hateful people, there will be Bad people. But there are also NOT those people. There are queer people who still love their fandoms. There are people writing trans Harry Potter fics. There are people cosplaying Draco in a skirt and fuck gender rolls we're vibing here. There's also a massive difference between enjoying a community built by fans, and directly supporting JKR with money and attention. What you do in response to her cruelty is totally valid, however you decide. Deleting the content is completely understandable. Not wanting to see anything Harry Potter related is also valid, especially when so many of us have been seriously hurt by her. Not supporting JKR in views or money is important to supporting trans people. But I can't tell people how to respond, how to behave, or how to experience the fandom. Trauma responses vary by person. Being angry and yet completely embracing the fandom to the point where it belongs to the fans is also a super valid reaction. People are a complex system of experiences and reactions. There is no one set way to respond. There is always room to learn, there is always room to listen. The unfortunate truth, however, is this has happened before with creators who we learn are complete assholes, and will happen again. The best we can do is support one another and regularly tell the people who are out to hurt us to fuck right off.