#i think eating at court should be allowed
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aftgficrec · 2 days ago
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Hi do you guys know of any fics where neil ends up in Easthaven (or similar) because years of ignoring his trauma and refusing Bee finally catches up with him and it’s andreil focused?
There’s plenty about Neil and his mental health around, but most fics where Neil is in Easthaven or a similar institution are AUs. We’ve got some postcanon fics for you here where Neil has neglected his mental health to such a degree that the consequences are fairly disastrous (even though often he finally agrees to go to therapy). So, beware of the trigger warnings! - S
Also see these previous recs:
(see top of posts for further recs)
Neil & Bee here 
Neil goes to therapy here
Neil attempts suicide here
You might also like…
Andreil and eating disorders here
Andreil meet in Easthaven here
Neil with depression/mental illness here
Neil with anxiety attacks here
Some more fics featuring Neil struggling with his mental health/seeking help:
‘cracked but not smashed’ here
‘I No Longer Feel Things (I Know I Should)’ (since updated) and ‘I can feel you under my skin’ here
‘I'm Not Okay (I Promise)’ here
‘yes, I’m still trying’ here
I feel the burden now (it’s weighing down my soul) by Loverz_rock [Not Rated, 3238 words, complete, 2024]
Neil broke away from Andrew’s gaze to stare out the window. “Will you keep me from killing myself? Ever since you gave me a key and told me to stay I’ve been fighting to do just that. But I don’t have it in me to do it any longer. I don’t know how to live now that I’m allowed to.” Neil let his fingers run through his hair as he returned his gaze to the blond. Andrew’s hand twitched to reach out. Instead he took a long drag from his cigarette, focusing on letting the smoke out. “Don’t ask for stupid things. I’m not going to make a deal about that” Neil didn’t push, he just stood there staring at Andrew while inhaling the smoke to keep him grounded. “I’m already doing that, idiot.” Or: Neil is sinking down a dark place during his last year of college, but Andrew is there to catch him.
tw: suicidal thoughts, tw: panic attacks, tw: implied/referenced self harm, tw: ptsd
I Am A Forest Fire by hetheylecter [Rated M, 3558 words, complete, 2024]
Everyone was staring at him, he knew. They were thinking how stupid he was for all this. He was Neil Josten. He was Nathaniel fucking Wesninski. He should not be breaking down over a few friends family moving on with their lives.  or. it’s neil’s senior year. he’s totally coping.
tw: suicidal thoughts, tw: ptsd, tw: vomit, tw: dissociation, tw: blood
Neil Josten is Not Fine by the_greater_grief [Rated T, 3365 words, complete, Aftg Then & Never 2024]
After weeks of nightmares and an embarrassing discovery, Neil finally decides to pay Betsy a visit.
tw: implied/referenced torture, tw: implied/referenced rape/noncon, tw: nightmares, tw: bedwetting
i'll take anything you have (if you could throw me a line) by ifitmeanslosingyou [Rated M, 923 words, complete, 2024]
the sunrise can be pretty, neil thinks, but instead of the pinks and oranges washing him with ease, neil can’t help the panic at the thought that he’s been up here for longer than he planned to he wonders if anyone has even realized he left the dorms in the first place, wonders if andrew even looked when neil left the bedroom, wonders if he gave up, wonders if he finally came to his senses and realized neil was more trouble than he’s worth wonders if the roof of the court is high enough that the fall would kill him
tw: suicidal thoughts, tw: implied/referenced self harm
help, I've lost myself again (but I remember you) by abitsillygoofy [Not Rated, 5320 words, complete, 2024]
“Neil we have to talk about it,” Betsy said “I don’t think so” Neil replied “Nope, not happening” He popped the p at the end trying to make the woman mad at him. “You just tried to kill yourself, so I think we have to have this talk” Betsy didn’t seem bothered by his act and kept her nice, neutral facial expression, but unlike on his session looked worried too. or Neil wakes up in the hospital after his suicide attempt and has to face what he did.
tw: suicide attempt, tw: self harm, tw: blood
I Quit Talking Again, I Know You're Still Listening by Hyalophagia [Not Rated, 36085 words, complete, 2024]
"Andrew didn’t know how to stop something from breaking; he’d nearly died trying. But Neil had taught him it was possible to put the broken pieces back together, and he was determined to return the favour." Neil was only a freshman and a rookie when he made his deal with Ichirou. He hadn't stopped to consider how much pressure he was putting on himself; he'd lived in danger his entire life and was used to fighting to stay alive. He'd be fine. He'd always been fine and he always would be. Right?
tw: self harm, tw: dissociation, tw: disordered eating, tw: ptsd, tw: panic attacks
hand. cheek. trigger. bang. by tae_doelee [Rated T, 3980 words, incomplete, last updated March 2022]
(NB: fic is marked as complete, but the storyline is left unfinished)
Neils struggle with depression post-AFTG, things have changed but maybe not as much as he thought.
tw: ptsd, tw: depression, tw: dissociation
You Still have me by Marydu [Rated G, 3826 words, complete, 2022]
Neil is missing again Andrew is worried Where is Neil? What the hell is going on? Andrew is furious that he doesn't know
tw: dissociation, tw: alcohol abuse, tw: minor character death
bullet point fic/headcanon by nightquills [Rated T, collection, complete, 2021]
Chapter 8: out of touch
neil knew that things couldn’t stay the same forever. he knew he and his foxes, his friends, his family would be leaving palmetto soon to start the rest of their lives. 
tw: depression, tw: dissociation
Choices by Tori_Scribbles [Rated T, 3306 words, complete, 2019]
Part 6 of In A Foxes Hole
“You walked into Evermore, knowing full well what they were going to do to you. You left with your father’s people not expecting to come back out alive. But Betsy is what you’re terrified of?”
tw: anxiety, tw: ptsd, tw: implied/referenced child abuse
Neil & therapy by @queer-lovebot [tumblr, 2023]
Knowing Neil, he isn’t getting therapy post-canon for at Least 5 years. He is, however, extremely curious about the effects it has on literally all the other Foxes.
AU-setting:
you make your hand a gun (you lie to everyone) by superache208 [Rated T, 13740 words, incomplete, last updated Jan 2025]
When Andrew arrives at the Columbia Psychiatric Hospital, he feels nothing but numb. That is until he meets his roommate Neil. Neil has been in the hospital for two weeks, and he's determined to escape. Unless someone gives him a reason to stay. Or: where Neil and Andrew first meet in a Psychiatric Hospital before ever meeting the Foxes and slowly learn to heal.
tw: suicide attempt, tw: anxiety, tw: ptsd, tw: eating disorders, tw: paranoia
more than enough by drunk_poet [Rated M, 6114 words, complete, 2024]
In the shadows of a quiet mental hospital, two broken men find themselves adrift in a world that doesn’t see them. Andrew Minyard hides behind silence, having long forgotten how to connect with anyone. Neil Josten wears his scars like armor, each one a piece of his fractured past. Neither of them expects more than solitude within these walls. But when their paths cross in the silence of an empty room, something unexpected stirs—an understanding, a shared darkness that only they can see in each other. Drawn together by wounds that refuse to heal, they begin to find solace in each other's presence, their guarded hearts slowly thawing in moments of quiet connection. Their bond is fragile, threatened by the very ghosts that brought them here, yet they find themselves clinging to it, both terrified and mesmerized by the possibility of love in the unlikeliest of places.
tw: self harm, tw: implied/referenced suicide attempt, tw: panic attacks
5 Meter Walls | 5 Meter Mauern by jetblackromance [Rated E, 7570 words, complete, 2024]
Teen Neil and teen Andrew meet in a psychiatric ward. Neil’s mom died at the beach after an encounter with Neil's father's men. Neil's own wounds were more severe than he had thought. He passed out in a motel and the owner called child services on him. They found him just in time and called an ambulance. After a few weeks in the hospital, they decided a stay at the psychiatric ward would be best for him. Andrew was staying with Cass and Richard. He had accepted that he had to deal with Drake if he wanted to stay with Cass. He found his own way to cope with it. Usually he hid it well enough; no one but Drake knew about it, the armbands covered the evidence. But one day, Cass saw and signed him up for an eight week long stay at a psychiatric ward.
tw: implied/referenced rape/noncon, tw: implied/referenced self harm, tw: implied/referenced child abuse, tw: graphic depictions of violence, tw: scars
Sunrise by hetheylecter [Rated M, 4459 words, complete, 2024]
Freedom was… not what Neil was expecting. It wasn’t as… freeing?  or. neil navigates the hell that is middle school, mental health, and freedom.
tw: self harm, tw: suicide attempt, tw: eating disorders, tw: implied/referenced bullying
Butchered Bloodline by starrycassi [Rated M, 26472 words, incomplete, last updated Oct 2024]
Nathaniel's life is pretty boring. He has been a long-term patient in a mental facility for the last half of a decade, after all, so there aren't that many options to entertain oneself with. That is until Andrew Minyard breaks into his life — along with a serial killer, a chance to rebuild his life and a truth for truth deal. Or the one where after being captured along with his father, Nathaniel attempts to keep up with his own existence.
tw: graphic descriptions of violence, tw: implied/referenced murder, tw: implied/referenced dismemberment, tw: cannibalism, tw: ptsd, tw: implied/referenced torture
Baby, We're Both Crazy by Detective4 [Not Rated, 7806 words, incomplete, last updated Jan 2023]
“So...Have you been here before?” Neil’s eyebrows furrowed, “What?” “To Orchard Respite. Or any other hospital I guess. This is my second time here, sixth time in a psychiatric hospital in total.” Daniel said, far too cheerfully. “This is… My first time.” “A first-timer?” Daniel’s eyes widened, “Boy, are you in for a treat."  -- Teens Andrew and Neil meet for the first time in a mental hospital. They've both been committed against their will and both for different reasons. With all their multitudes of issues, can they find love?
tw: implied/referenced suicide attempt, tw: implied/referenced self harm
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elektricangel · 2 days ago
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All valid points! I sincerely hope we can enact stricter regulation around gen AI, especially when it comes to the spread of falsified or misleading information. I have deep concerns about people no longer being able to tell the difference between what is real and what is artificial, and what that would do (and has already done) to our society.
I suppose I’m simply more pessimistic. At least in capitalist systems, the incentive has always been to replace people with cheaper alternatives, and I see no reason why that would change with gen AI. It genuinely seems to be the dawn of a new sort of industrial revolution, poised to leave a lot more workers ground up in the gears of the corporate machine. (Which is not to discount the many ways the technology can improve our lives, especially in specialized fields like medicine.) Sure, we have more workers’ rights now, but regulations still tend to encourage competition over cooperation. I just don’t see governments restricting the use of a technology simply because it allows companies to downsize their work forces and gain a competitive advantage. And I say that in all empathy with everyone out here struggling in the current labor market—I’m right here with you.
I take some solace in the fact that gen AI is currently restrained by its own technological limits. If AI-generated content is all that’s out there, then gen AI becomes a snake eating its own tail and the quality of its output begins to degrade. In an isolated system, entropy can only increase. Gen AI needs human input to keep improving, and perhaps it always will. Perhaps it simply can’t replace us all. Or perhaps that’s wishful thinking.
AI theft is another issue, one I am currently of two minds on. As a fellow creator, I also take umbrage with artists and writers not being fairly compensated for use of their work. However, I have yet to hear a compelling argument that makes a clear distinction between human and machine learning. Human writers read a lot of other writers’ work to improve their craft. Human artists observe and study a lot of other artists’ work to hone their skills. Gen AI basically does the same thing. If it’s used to reproduce a creator’s existing work, that is blatant theft and plagiarism. But if it has learned from a multitude of creators whose work is openly accessible in order to produce something “new,” that doesn’t seem like theft to me. That seems like a totally normal thing that human creators do, too. Every creator is influenced and inspired by (i.e. "trained on") other creators' work. (What is actually new or original is a whole other debate, one creators have been having since long before gen AI. Are there really only 7 stories that we just keep retelling a little differently? Is there anything new under the sun? It’s a very human quandary.)
I suppose what I’m missing is the legal argument for theft, and if anyone has a clear grasp of it, I’d be interested to hear it or to check out some recommended sources. (I haven’t actually read the relevant court cases yet.) My understanding is that a human writer doesn’t need my permission to read a story I posted publicly, and learn something from it that they then apply in their own writing. Why, then, would a machine need my permission to do that? Honest question! Not to mention, as a fanfic writer, transformative works are a legal grey area that I thrive in, and I am leery of more restrictive regulations around IP that may have wider-reaching consequences beyond AI-generated works. Not to say that such regulations shouldn’t be put in place. Only that we should be very careful about them.
pls stop having ai profile pic
Since there’s a “pls” in here, I’m going to treat it as a polite discussion starter. If anyone else actually cares enough to voice an opinion. Here’s where I’m at on gen AI:
1) I’m not a visual artist and I don’t pretend to be. I didn’t replace a piece of commissioned art, either. What I am is a writer, and I think it’s neat that I can make a picture from words in a literal sense. That’s all.
2) As a writer, I share the fears of visual artists that gen AI will replace me someday. But I don’t think it’s pragmatic to believe we can turn back the clock on the technology. We can either adapt to it or get left in the dust. (Remember the Luddites?)
3) Not that it’s really anyone’s business, but I don’t have money to spare on commissioning art currently. Like a lot of people in the entertainment industry, I lost my job this year in the mass layoffs.
4) The argument I’m most sympathetic to is the environmental one. Gen AI needs to become more sustainable and energy efficient. That’s why I’ve only used it sparingly (3 times this year, to be precise.)
All that said, I’m always willing to hear respectful opposing arguments. If you’d actually like to make one, you’re more than welcome to.
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chemilico · 1 month ago
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Doodle page and food court (haha get it)
(also random song for u to enjoy)
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justaz · 1 year ago
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country bumpkin merlin not knowing anything about city life and accidentally courting arthur without knowing
merlin, watching gwen give lancelot her favor: why do you do that
gwen, heart eyes at lance and not paying that much attention to the conversation: so he knows i’m rooting for him
merlin, with an Idea: ah.
gwaine, lover of chaos, pisser offer of nobles and royals alike, ultimate wingman: merlin…you have such lonely lips. shall i introduce them to mine?
merlin, unaware of the game gwaine is playing: so you can steal my breath away? i think not, scoundrel
arthur, crushing his goblet in his hand:
merlin: arthur’s been in a bad mood recently :( i should cheer him up
merlin, remembering when arthur was put out when merlin brought morgana flowers and not him: i know just the thing
merlin, bringing a bouquet of carnations, roses, and tulips and setting them on arthur’s table while he’s eating breakfast: good morning, sire
arthur, trained on flower language in hopes that one day when he was to take a queen he could woo her easily, trying not to audibly choke on his sausage as he reads merlin’s declaration of love sitting in front of him:
arthur, who recently found out about merlin’s magic and was trying to find a way to bring it up, catching him in the act and watching merlin panic to explain himself:
merlin, Freaking: and i swear to you arthur, i have only ever used it for you. my magic is yours. my life is yours. i am yours. i would never do anything to harm you. i have protected you for years and will continue to do so at your side if you’ll have me
arthur, already believing them to be courting, desperately trying to figure out if that was a proposal for marriage or not but tired of being confused and deciding fuck it: here.
merlin, taking it: i…uh…huh?
arthur, watching merlin with hawk eyes and trying to figure out what he’s thinking and feeling: it’s my mothers sigil
merlin, confused as FUCK but is focusing on the fact that arthur is handing him something of his mother rather than a death sentence: my…my lord?
arthur, realizing how scared merlin’s must be about him finding out about his magic and trying to comfort him while also proposing, killing two birds with one stone: i will always keep you at my side, merlin, so long as we both shall live. if you’ll allow me.
merlin, almost collapsing with relief and tearing up, smiling at arthur as if he had parted the storm clouds to allow sun to shine down on them in that moment: of course…of course, arthur. always and forever.
merlin, watching the castle staff rush this way and that: wow. this banquet must be incredibly important
sir leon the long suffering, day one ride or die, one of the original merthur shippers: banquet? merlin, this is for your wedding
merlin, overworked and exhausted: my WHAT? to WHO??
leon, regretting everything he’s ever done in his life that led him to this moment: to…arthur?
merlin, over joyed but also absolutely befuddled: i’m getting married to ARTHUR?????
leon: you two have been courting for the past year or so, have you not?
merlin: i’ve been COURTING ARTHUR?????? FOR A YEAR?????????
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undertheorangetree · 8 months ago
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Tantrum
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Summary- Art’s girlfriend sucks at tennis. He helps her feel better.
Warnings- MDNI 18+ NSFW. Female reader. Stanford era Art. Exhibitionism. Body worship. Cunnilingus. Wee bit of fingering. P in V sex. Riding. The fluffiest giggliest sex you've ever seen. Me not knowing a damn thing about tennis.
Author's Note- Hi idk if you noticed but i have Challengers brain rot rn specifically for Art Donaldson :// As a theatre kid I simply had no choice it was always gonna be him. Read the full fic on AO3.
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When Art had looked up at her with big pleading eyes, all but begging her to allow him to teach her the basics of tennis, she was in no position to refuse. It had been sweet, how badly he wanted to share his passion with her, the kisses he had peppered across her neck and chest in order to entice her into it, and she couldn’t so much as imagine denying him. Forget the fact that she had never held a racket in her life, that her strengths had always been rooted in academia rather than athletics.  If allowing him to teach her would make him happy, she would do it.
Though not without complaint.
She lets out a frustrated grunt as the ball hits the net- again- before turning her head up to glare at Art when he barely manages to stifle his laugh. He smothers it immediately when he catches sight of her glower, hand coming up to rub at his mouth as if he can physically wipe away his smile and she feels her teeth grind together.
“You can’t laugh. You’re the one who wanted me to do this so you’re not allowed to make fun of me,” she complains, her voice half petulance half hurt and immediately his face morphs into something more apologetic.
“I’m sorry baby.” He makes his way closer but she simply rolls her eyes, turning her nose up when he reaches out to her. He takes it in stride. “I’m not laughing at you, you’re doing very well. It’s just funny to see you so frustrated.”
It’s her turn to laugh, though it is little more than a humourless bark. “I am not doing very well. I suck.”
He makes a sympathetic noise as he attempts to reach for her again. She allows it begrudgingly, resisting the urge to roll her eyes as his hands close around her elbows, face dropping into her neck to press a kiss there. She thinks that he’s about to praise her further, try to coax her back into committing herself to the game, but he stays silent, continuing to lavish her with silent kisses.
She’s happy for the odd hour they decided to come here, the tennis court completely devoid of any other life. It’s a colder night than it should be for mid spring, the floodlights and moon the only two things to provide them with any light, and she’s grateful finals have chased everyone else away. She’s glad to have this time alone with him, despite her frustration. To feel like they are the only two people in the world.
“You’re just hitting the ball too hard,” he explains, face still half buried in her throat. “And you aren’t even attempting to aim. Putting everything you have behind the hit doesn’t make it a good one if you don’t know where you’re sending it. There’s more to tennis than just force, you have to be smart about it.”
She scoffs, reaching up to press her palm against his forehead and shove him away, ignoring the shit eating grin that’s made itself known on his face. “Just go over there and hit the damn ball. Before I leave you here by yourself.”
The grin doesn’t fade, his amusement more than clear, but he does as she asks, returning to his side of the court. She lets out another aggravated sigh as she returns to the position he had told her to wait in, knees bent as she waits for him to serve, realizing more and more that she prefers to watch him play tennis rather than do it with him. She finds far more joy watching him from the stands as he chases after the ball, sweat dripping from his curls and grunts echoing in her ears. Here, where she is the one chasing the ball like a damn dog and failing to send it sailing over the net when she does manage to catch it, there is no time to admire Art in his element.
She almost feels bad for her poor attitude, wishing she was less competitive so that she could simply enjoy this quality time with him, but every failure does nothing but enrage her further, sending her spiralling further into frustration.
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Read the rest here :)
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ervotica · 7 months ago
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milf!reader fucking coach!patrick because she wants her son to get accepted into his tennis program and they’re old friend who used to fuck in college but she despises him but she’ll do anything for her son👀
warnings; smut, 18+, p in v sex, unprotected sex (wrap it b4 u tap it), cum eating, a smidge of foot stuff if you squint, hate sex, exes (ish) to lovers (ish)
a/n; your honor i need him actually
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imagining him wolf-whistling at you when you seek him out on the courts, racket strapped over your shoulder, hand limply holding a basket of tennis balls as you watch him practice his serving, trying and failing not to ogle his entire body through his clothes.
a sweat soaked tank top, slick and transparent. the smell of musk and man and tennis. thick corded thighs dusted with dark hair as he moves fluidly, as though the racket is an extension of himself. a thick bulge in his shorts that, no matter how much you hate him, you want to have your mouth on.
he’s all fire and passion and heat, and you know from experience that trait rings true in all areas of his life.
“so, you’re a milf now,” he drawls, beckoning you closer with a tip of his chin. your mouth is dry, chest so hollow it feels like you’re about to crumble from the inside out.
you roll your eyes, hoping to look more confident than you feel, taking place on the other side of the net.
“and you’re still a prick. your point?”
“why are you here?” he presses, tossing the ball up and catching it with a skilled ease that has your stomach flipping.
“how do i guarantee my son a place in your tennis program?” the words feel heavy on your tongue, struggling not to curl your lips into a sneer at the sight of his smug expression.
“you think i’m a prick but you want me to teach your son?”
“i think you’re a prick but i know you’re good at tennis. and you’re a good teacher. and i want him to be good.” his brow quirks. at least you’re honest.
he discards the tennis ball behind him and crosses the distance between you, long legs coming up to step over the net.
“i can think of a few things.”
that’s how you find yourself at his place, legs slung over his shoulders. it’s wet and dirty, each rock of his hips squelching as he feeds you his cock into your needy cunt inch by inch.
“yeah, know this pussy missed me, baby,” he rasps, pinching at your twitching clit. his throat works around a thick swallow, lips parted in a groan when you clench your cunt round him, shifting your hips upward to allow him to sink further into the wet clutch of you.
“stop talking to my pussy, you freak,” you hiss, quickly silenced as he flattens his thumb over your swollen bud, rolling it in tight circles until you’re creaming round him, wailing with the sheer force of your orgasm
he lifts your ankle, turning his flushed face to mouth at the smooth skin there, huffing hot air against the sole of your foot that has you squirming.
there are some perks to fucking patrick zweig.
he knows every inch of your body, knows what makes you tick and which buttons to press to keep you babbling nonsensical filth beneath him. knows your pussy, knows how to fuck you until you cry.
you’re clinging to his shoulders, almost drawing blood as you dig your knuckles further into that skin, because you know him just as well. know that this gets him going, keeps him rutting into you with that fervour that - despite yourself, despite hating him - you’ve missed so desperately.
because despite hating patrick zweig, no one fucks you like he does.
when he cums it’s in excess, spurt after spurt of it until you’re plugged full and it’s flooding you, dripping out of your spasming hole and gathering over your furled asshole. he gathers some of it with two fingers, feeds it into your eager mouth.
“i’m sure we can work something out about those tennis lessons, sweets.” and he grins, all teeth. the look should have you balking, send you running, but you find yourself drawn to it, clinging to the familiarity of him.
you’re caught in his honey trap once again, and he has no plans of letting you get away this time.
because you both know, no matter how much you claim to hate him, he’s the best sex you’ve ever had.
and he’s sure he can make you love him. just with a little time.
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silverfairywings · 1 month ago
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— IN THE WAKE OF FLAMES. PT III
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eris vanserra x archeron!reader
summary: even before you became fae, your favourite season was autumn. it’s a little hard to hide this when your least favourite newly appointed high lord has made it his life’s mission to be the most annoying male in your life.
a/n: sorry for such a long break!! pls let me know what u think and again if you’d like to be added to the tag list send me a message or ask as I rarely check my notifs and go back to them. also sorry abt the cliffhanger uhmmmm also unedited ok bye
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“You look like crap.”
Your eyes flutter open to see Mor scrunching up her face as she peers at you from her seat across your own at the dining table. It takes a second for her words to register and you throw a belated scowl her way.
“Good morning to you too,” you mumble, sitting up to continue swirling your spoon around your bowl of barely eaten oatmeal. Your appetite seems to have vanished over the past week, but you try and force a spoonful down your throat, nearly gagging.
Mor narrows her eyes at you and her lips press into a thin line of concern. “No, you seriously look like crap. You’re not eating lately and you were literally asleep at the table when I got here.”
“I wasn’t asleep,” you say, defensively. “I was resting my eyes.”
“You sound like Cassian after a three hour afternoon nap.”
“I’m just having a little trouble sleeping.” You set your spoon down and push the offending bowl away from you before slumping in your seat. You brush off her skeptical look with a wave of your hand. “I’m always like this after absorbing Fae magic.”
And over the last few days you’ve been absorbing a lot. All in an attempt to find out as much as you could about the Fae rebel group that had been attacking the borders of multiple Courts, in order to weaken them and make a point against you.
Well, you and your sisters. Not all of Prythian was accepting of Feyre for how she was Made, and even less so of you and Nesta and Elain. Instead, they viewed you as unnatural mutations and the whispers had only become worse after the War. It seemed that the lack of conflict looming over Prythian was unacceptable in their eyes.
With the help of your powers and Azriel’s shadows, you were closer than ever to finding them. Truthfully, the idea that there were Fae out there who hated you didn’t bother you so much in the sense of feeling like outcasts, but you couldn’t lie. They were starting to be a giant pain in your ass.
“You’re never like this,” Mor scoffs, gesturing to the bags under your eyes and the hollowness of your cheeks. As her voice raises, the pounding of your head gets more intense and you attempt to hold back a grimace. “Why is it affecting you so much this time?”
“It’s the type of magic I’m absorbing,” you practically whine, abandoning all pretences of being okay and allowing your shoulders to drop. “It’s so angry and harsh and impure, Mor! It’s literally making me sick because I have nowhere else to redirect it.”
At that moment Rhysand and Feyre walk in to join you at the table.
Rhysand, having overheard you, chimes in as he reaches for a plate of fruit. “Good news, our little Siphon,” he nudges you lightly, the nickname making you scrunch your nose up in mock annoyance. “We have enough information now to move forward using Az and Cass and resources from other Courts. The only thing we need you to do now is rest.”
Rhysand’s upbeat tone brings a weak smile to your face. You know that he’s being flippant to make you feel better, like he always does when you’re stressed or unwell and you’re nothing but appreciative as he whistles under his breath, nonchalantly piling some fruit onto a plate for you.
“You should have been resting days ago,” Feyre eyes you from beside Rhys with furrowed brows, taking in your tired form. “We told you yesterday would be too much.”
You groan, burying your face in your hands. “Give me a couple hours and I’ll be fine for the meeting in Summer.”
Mor snorts and looks up at you, amused. When you raise an eyebrow, her smile drops into an incredulous expression. “You’re not serious.”
“I need to be there to discuss what I siphoned from that knife we found at the border of Dawn,” you say, holding up a hand and rushing out the rest of your words when Feyre opens her mouth to speak. “And Rhys promised me I would be there since it’ll be all the High Lords, Court informants and even soldiers. I couldn’t possibly not go.”
Feyre sighs, sensing that you’re not going to back down. She nods slowly, pointing at your plate. “Finish all of your breakfast and your lunch later on and then you can go.”
You let out a breath, feeling nauseous when Rhys slides your plate closer to you and simply shrugs when you glare at him. Traitor, you speak to him in your mind. He suddenly becomes very interested in a strawberry.
“Watch me,” you say confidently, waving your fork at Feyre who rolls her eyes at you and goes back to her own breakfast.
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Summer court is your least favourite court at the best of times, though you’d never admit that to sweet and kind Tarquin, who’s arguably one of your favourite High Lords.
The beautiful, shimmering lagoons aren’t of interest to you as large bodies of water have always unsettled you. The warm breeze that everyone welcomes always reminds you of the times you had to suffer through sweltering heat when foraging for food with Feyre in your adolescence. You’ve always preferred a colder climate and appreciated a more muted daylight.
Considering your current health, the ripples in the water make you dizzy and the light salty breeze nearly brings your breakfast and lunch up.
You’re thankful for the sheer, thin material of the sage coloured dress that Nuala and Cerridwen chose for you because you suddenly feel a sheen of sweat covering your body.
“Are we done sightseeing?” you ask weakly, desperate to be inside already.
Elain turns to you and winces. “You don’t look too good….”
“Aw, thank you, Elain.”
“That’s not what I mean,” she tuts, coming over to fan your face with her hands. You swat them away, sputtering and try to catch Rhysand’s attention to move things along. He reluctantly agrees and gestures everyone to move along, too used to your aversion to Summer.
As you all enter the palace made of gleaming marble, you hang further back to avoid the watchful eyes of Feyre who seems to be waiting to send you right back home to rest.
The palace is beautiful and you push down your nausea to look around and take in the tall arched windows. The jewelled embellishments adorning the frames trail higher and higher and you crane your neck to see them.
This turns out to be a mistake when your vision starts to blur and another wave of nausea causes your steps to falter, the world tilting sharply.
A firm hand grips your elbow in an all too familiar fashion, steadying you before you’re sent flying to the ground. Another hand settles around your waist where the cutout of your dress exposes your now damp skin, glittering with sweat.
You look up and find Eris’ amber eyes locked onto your own.
“Foolish,” he mutters, his voice sharp with irritation, yet his hands remain steady in their position, holding you up. It’s the first word he’s uttered to you since your encounter a couple of weeks ago in the Spring Court where he’d left on frosty terms. You had seen him twice since then, but it was in the middle of meetings and siphoning sessions and he had barely spared you a single glance.
Your lips part but your senses are too overwhelmed to think of a response before he carries on, lightly shaking his head at you. “You overexert yourself all week and then travel here? What are you trying to prove?”
“I’m fine,” you manage to say, pulling away from him, but his grip only tightens. You can’t help glancing around and noticing that the growing crowd of all the Court officials has separated you from the Inner Circle. You huff out a breath as you register his words. You knew Rhysand had to communicate with the other High Lords with updates, but you didn’t know that included your physical state. “Gods, High Lords are such gossips…”
“You’re not fine,” he says, scowling like you’ve dreadfully inconvenienced him by nearly collapsing. His gaze flickers over the pallor of your skin and the way you’ve started to shiver slightly. “You drained yourself dry this week. And for what? To impress Rhysand? To prove something to him?”
“Let go of me, Eris,” you attempt to snap at him, but even you can hear the lack of strength in your voice. His eyes soften slightly when you say his name without your usual bite. “I can’t have this same conversation with you when I’m like this.”
“You think I want to be the one always catching you from falling on your face? Trust me when I say I have things I would rather be doing,” he mutters, narrowing his eyes.
You grit your teeth at the reminder and heat flares in your cheeks, whether it’s from embarrassment, anger or the climate of Summer, you don’t know.
Before you can retort, Eris sighs and straightens you up, still not fully letting you go. Releasing the hand around your waist, he loops your arm in his own and makes you lean on him for support. To your utter surprise, he doesn’t say anything as he starts walking towards the meeting room where everyone else files in. Despite your frustration, you’re grateful for his strength.
The moment of blissful silence doesn’t last too long, however. As he begins to lead you to where your family is stood and clearly looking around frantically for you, Eris leans in to whisper in your ear. “You need to sit down at the table,” he orders quietly, High Lord behaviour on full display.
You’re about to argue that no one else is going to be sat and he immediately catches this, cutting you off. “Don’t be stubborn for once in your life,” he murmurs, breath warm against your ear, making you shiver more than you already were. “Please?”
You quickly turn your head to meet his, shocked at the pleading in his voice. You didn’t realise how close this would bring your own face to his and words leave you. Thankfully, you’ve reached your family as you hear Cassian’s loud voice and it snaps you out of your little bubble.
“Finally!” he exclaims, throwing his arms up in exasperation. “We were about to send a search and rescue team, thinking you’d finally collapsed.”
“Why didn’t you?” Eris asks, coldly.
Cassian merely rolls his eyes at Eris’ attitude and gestures at Azriel.
Feyre comes forward to take your other arm in hers and explains. “Azriel’s shadows informed us that you were with her, Eris.” She smiles warmly and sincerely at him and Rhysand nods at him in recognition of his actions. “Thank you for looking after my sister.”
Eris shakes his head. “Don’t thank me yet. I foresee many falls in her near future that I’m sure I won’t be present for.”
Feyre’s mouth twitches, but she quickly smoothes her face into an expressionless one when you frown at her and she busies herself with disentangling you from Eris.
He takes a step back, dark and fiery hair catching the sunlight through the tall windows and glances at you once more, not breaking eye contact, yet his words are directed towards Feyre. “Just make sure she sits down. The Night Court doesn’t need a martyr,” he says drily, before walking away.
Your mouth goes dry at the double meaning in his words, but you can’t shake off the shock at seeing genuine concern in his eyes. You must have looked practically near death, but you appreciated it all the same and you don’t even realise your eyes are lingering on him as he walks away until Feyre sits you down next to Nesta.
Your older sister raises an eyebrow at you, always so intuitive and you swat weakly at her to look away from you. Cassian’s eyes flit back and forth between you two, confused.
Before he can say anything, the meeting commences and you feel a shift in the energy of the room, full to the brim of Court officials, emissaries, a few warriors and of course, the High Lords around the table.
Your turn to speak comes fairly quickly since the most information regarding the Rebels is from you and Azriel. As per Rhysand’s instructions, you don’t go into any details regarding your siphoning powers, instead just sharing the information you gained due to them. You try to ignore the way people are staring at your weak form, but you continue to speak with all the strength you can muster. Evidently, you’re doing a convincing job as people start to nod, satisfied and scribble things down.
When Azriel’s turn arrives, you zone out a little, already having heard everything a few times over. Your ears only perk up when everyone is discussing plans of action against the Rebels and a question is asked in your general direction.
“Who are we thinking is to be at the front lines of this hypothetical mission?” The question comes from one of the Spring Court advisors, Vaelith, an older Fae with silver hair gathered in one long braid down his back.
His gaze lingers on you for only a split second before moving onto Rhysand and you feel compelled to answer. “Myself and Azriel,” you blurt out, before you can think twice. “And others of course, but the two of us are the most familiar with-”
“We’re all aware of the Shadowsinger’s abilities,” Vaelith interrupts you, holding up a hand to stop you from talking. You hold back a scowl. “What makes you suitable to lead such a mission aside from your… familiarity with a selection of items left behind by these Rebels?”
“I’m more than able to-” you cut yourself off and swallow, gaining yourself a second to think of a way to defend yourself without giving away your powers, as per your High Lord’s request.
Careful, Y/N
Rhysand’s voice sounds clear as day in your head and you try not to wince at the volume considering the silence of the rest of the room. The other High Lords knew of your powers, but Rhysand had requested they keep it to themselves, even from their own Court officials. Whether or not Rhysand had used his Daemati abilities to ensure this, you didn’t want to know.
“I’m more than able to assist in a plan of action,” you continue firmly, voice hardening. “I’m not sure if you remember a certain War we just had, but you may wish to remind yourself who was at the front lines of that.”
A few laughs break the tense silence and some people start muttering, slowly raising the volume of the room. You almost don’t hear Vaelith’s next words. “You haven’t really answered my question.”
“Let’s use our senses, Vaelith,” a voice rings out from further down the table and you’re startled to realise that Eris is speaking up. The room finally quietens down and you sit up impossibly straight, surprised that Eris is about to defend you.
You couldn’t be more wrong.
He only spares you a fleeting glance, but even from your seat you could see it’s full of amusement and mocking. The thing that surprises you is that the mocking is directed at you. “Look at her. Are you really questioning the abilities of a female who barely has the strength to sit up in her seat, let alone fight?”
Your stomach drops, a ball of humiliation unfurling in your chest as he continues to speak.
“I’d like to believe Rhysand has more sense than to send someone on the frontlines who would just be doing the rebels a favour,” Eris drawls, raising an eyebrow at Rhys, still avoiding your gaze.
Rhysand nods. “I can assure you I’ll only be sending my strongest soldiers, Vaelith,” he smirks, faintly, as though the implication he’d do anything to suggest otherwise is laughable. “Now may we discuss matters of actual importance? Tarquin, what have your soldiers been preparing?”
The tension dissolves almost immediately, but you’re still shellshocked, shaking with anger rather than weakness now. It’s as though you’ve been pumped with a burst of adrenaline and it doesn’t seem to be dampening.
After the conversation has shifted to a completely different subject, you shift from your seat as discretly as possible and mutter to Nesta that you need some air before standing up.
You look at the High Lord of Autumn before you walk away, but it only infuriates you more. Eris doesn’t look anywhere near you, but his jaw is clenched all the same, as though he can feel you glaring at him.
Mor catches your arm as you’re walking out and hisses in your ear. “You’re still not well,” she turns her body fully towards you. “Wait for me to come with you.”
“Don’t worry,” you say, shaking your head and clenching your fists to keep them from trembling as you speak through gritted teeth. “I feel suddenly energised. I’ll only be outside.”
Mor gives you a once over and is clearly satisfied with the fact that you’re unlikely to collapse again as she nods and releases your arm, allowing you to rush through the crowd of people and push through the guards.
You walk briskly away from the doors of the meeting room and further down the empty hallway until you’re satisfied that no one will hear your heavy breathing.
You lean against a pillar, exhaling in and out to control your anger and keep the tears at bay. Gods, you feel so stupid. Of course, Eris is incapable of being a decent male to anyone, let alone to you. Damn him and his cruel smirk and damn Rhysand too for allowing it to happen.
Brushing away the tears that have managed to fall, you curse yourself for not just pushing him away and allowing yourself to collapse on the hard marble flooring. It was giving you whiplash the way he could be so full of concern one second and practically call you useless in front of a room full of officials the next.
The longer you stand against the marble pillar, the weaker you begin to feel and that burst of adrenaline you previously felt is no longer present. The anger that fuelled you mere seconds ago is now winding you and a rising sense of panic begins to consume you.
You decide to turn around to walk back so you’re closer to the doors of the meeting room in case you embarrassingly do collapse.
However, the second you take a step, a flash of movement in the corner of your eye is all the warning you get before strong arms clamp around you from behind and a cloth is pressed against your mouth and nose, preventing you from breathing. You can’t even scream as the scent of something strong and chemical floods your senses, making your vision blur.
You thrash around in an attempt to use the little strength you have left to escape, but the arms only grip you harder and the world begins to spin. The last thing you feel is the cool marble floor as your knees give out and no one bothers to catch you as you hit the ground, darkness swallowing you whole.
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tag list: @fabulouslyflamboyant @deepestmentalityperson @lilah-asteria @kitsunetori @abysshaven @nayaniasworld @rcarbo1 @paleidiot @tenshis-cake @bunnyredgirl @goldenmagnolias @whydohumansss @fandomtrash465 @mrsbarnes32557038 @aaprilshowers @scarsandallaz @-im-fantastic- @cat-or-kitten @annamariereads16 @adelina-127 @onlymexsarah @puddlesplasher17 @eyes-capone @hermaeuswhora
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shmalk · 10 months ago
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141 is filled with alphas, not a single omega in sight. there are a few betas, but they're either low-ranking or transfers that were never going to last.
like you! (beta!reader) who works at reception and takes calls, scans badges and is the first point of contact for the task force.
none of them know your name, none of them even speak to you - maybe price, when you transfer a call to him, he'll mumble a thank you. or even laswell, when you bring her a coffee.
it's nothing, really, you don't mind.
only, one day, a totally normal friday, you've done the exact same style in your hair you always have, and you're wearing more clothes than you were yesterday.
price wants a coffee, sure- you make it, just the way he likes, and head towards his office. you knock, and wait a few seconds until you hear 'come in.'
the office is silent, it usually is - but this time there's more than just price inside.
they're finishing up just as you enter, soap and gaz sitting in front of the desk whilst ghost leant against the back wall.
"my apologies, captain." your voice isn't exactly quiet - why should it be, you've done nothing wrong, but its still respectful. price just nods as you place the cup down on his desk.
"thanks, that's all." he dismisses everyone in the room, and you wait for the boys to file out before you do, soap and gaz both giving you a cheeky smile.
ghost is the one to hold open the door, standing just adjacent to the doorway with his arm sprawled against it. its a heavy door, and you swallow as you pass him.
"thank you," you all but mumble out as you rush past him - straight into the break room.
you can't help but rant about the situation to your roommate whilst you're packing up your things, your phone tucked between your jaw and shoulder.
"i mean- he held the door open for me and i couldn't even look him in the eye to say thank you!" you stress, throwing your bag into your passenger seat before leaning back against your car. "god, all i wan't right now is a plate of sushi and some boba."
"too bad its pizza night, dweeb."
"thats not fair! i could loose my job, i should be allowed to eat my comfort food when im stressed out."
you stress about it over the whole weekend, and when you return back to work on monday you try to act as casual as possible. of course, you don't see ghost - price doesn't order a coffee, and youre break time comes around quicker than you expected.
you had brought- oh, theres- your favourite sushi, and a boba drink sitting where your food was supposed to be. in somewhat messy hand writing, on a small piece of paper, theres your name.
signed ' s. riley. '
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i am a sucker for sweet lil moments like this !!
in my head i think that simon would like a beta, or an alpha, but in this lil snippet (which is CERTAINLY getting turned into a fic) he's big and broad and gets worried when he's with alphas because they can't think straight, he tells them what to do and he does it.
but you? you dont react to his scent or chase him down to get him to court you - so, of fource, he courts you. <3
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lyrefromthesea · 5 months ago
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oh! Since you also do requests with hybrids, could I ask for wolfhybrids (or fox) hashiras x reader? Like hashiras see the reader as the perfect mate material, so they try to get closer to them by courting them in their own ways
Male Hashira x Reader - Prey tell?
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author's note: the title is a pun, my humor is dry. i fell down the stairs and sit in a hospital since yesterday.
pairing: Tengen x reader, Obanai x reader, Rengoku x reader, Sanemi x reader, Giyuu x reader, Gyomei x reader
content warning: wolf!hybrids, a/b/o, kny!au
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i've been thinking a lot about this idea now, especially which rank each hashira would have. alpha? beta? omega? it was quite hard, but i allowed myself to create a little au for better understanding.
to not mess things up, i decided that the reader will be an omega in this au. all the hashira are considered alphas, which of course has a reason too.
i've went through the a/b/o thing over the past two or three days and to put it simply: alpha is the equivalent to strong, omegas are weak in comparison.
the hashira are the strongest swordsmen in the corp, it would only be right to rank them as an alpha (or a beta).
you, on the other hand, have been fighting your way to the top. omegas are weaker than most, but you possess a strong mind, which helped you work your way up.
naturally, the day will come that you catch their attention, if only for the fact that you're an omega. i also imagine omegas to be more rare than alphas and betas, since they take on a weaker role in this au.
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Tengen:
• he's smitten since day one - an alpha different from any you've met yet. smug smirk and tall body towering over you the minute your scent hits his nose.
• your scent gives him the same feeling the scents of his three wives do. you're so small, perhaps not physically, but your weak omega presence makes his protective instincts flare up.
• just another day or two and three women are by your side, two betas and another omega looking at you with happiness and a feeling of finally coming home.
• you'll learn to love all of them - courting one is courting all. Tengen's not surprised to come home and find all of you nuzzled together in a cuddle pile.
• and if that isn't enough to turn you into a proper mate of his, shiny presents and lots of time squished between four other people will surely do it.
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Obanai:
• small and weak. how did you end up near the alphas? he's suspicious when he heard of you, no omega would be able to turn into a hashira. he needed to see that for himself.
• nearly falls off his spot in the tree when he sees you and a comforting scent hits his nose. he's almost embarrassed by the way his fluffy ears are twitching, trying to listen to your conversation with Rengoku.
• he follows you around for a few days, mustering up the courage to talk to you after nearly a week. you looked up when the man sat in front of you, another bowl of food in hand.
• he doesn't talk much, only telling you that omegas should eat more than you do. you awkwardly look at him for a while, taking the bowl after another minute and thanking him.
• the action alone got him blushing under his mask, bringing you food for the next month when he finds you eating somewhere around the training grounds.
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Rengoku:
• he's one of the calmer ones when he hears about your rank as a hashira. an omega got ranked this high? what incredible talent you must possess!
• he's by no means against your way of living, but he can't keep his mouth shut about how "you should stay home and get protected by a proper alpha!" it's no insult and you can sense that much, but you find yourself disagreeing.
• once he's sure that you're the perfect material for a mate, he'll court you the proper way, just like his mother once told him.
• it's just that his "proper courting" nearly has you running away in embarrassment.
• "dear [name], allow me to show you my interest through the traditional ways of courting one's future mate!"
• your agreement only came a day later, after you survived his booming voice right behind you in the midst of a forest's silence. next time he shouldn't sneak up on you like that.
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Sanemi:
• hah? ridiculous. a small thing like you is supposed to work midst the likes of him? don't make him laugh, he could eat you up for breakfast.
• with that attractive smell reeking from your body, you wouldn't survive a day. he would see you become a demon's snack sooner than later.
• his jaw nearly hits the ground when he sees you outsmart the lower rank demon in front of you with speed and flexibility instead of strength.
• he grumbles about your stupid cute presence, sweetly roaming around him. you're truthfully just going on about your day, but it's enough to make his mind go blank.
• you're the perfect mix of strong and obedient for him, listening so well to him, because "he's done this job longer than you and you were happy to learn."
• internally smacks himself when he tries signalling his courting intentions by gifting you clothes heavily drenched in his scent.
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Giyuu:
• he didn't voice his worries, but an omega living this kind of life? any alpha would be worried, right? especially since omegas have gotten so rare these days!
• but, oh, you're so sweet and nice. you once cooked him some soup and he swore you needed an alpha's protection - his protection.
• if he could just steal you away and ensure your safety, but he knew that would make you unhappy. so he makes sure to keep you safe by following you like a lap dog.
• it's not uncommon to see the new omega and the gloomy hashira take a walk together. people tend to avoid you, feeling unwell because of the intense stare the alpha behind you gives them.
• some of them swore they have seen the two of you nuzzle against each other. a hint of his scent had previously started lingering on your uniform too.
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Gyomei:
• is it just your imagination or have you been joining missions with the stone hashira more often? no, it's definitely true.
• ever since he has taken a liking to you, he had started courting you by ensuring your safety and happiness.
• he doesn't know a lot about proper courting, mostly because it didn't interest him for most of his life. his courting is really special, but you don't mind.
• instead of bestowing gifts upon you, he takes you to special places he has found, most of them with a unique smell - a waterfall or a meadow full of flowers.
• he tries to gouge your reactions, mostly trusting his ears and tail, because he sadly can't see your beautiful face.
• you find yourself blushing with the way his ears often twitch around you, trying to listen to your every breath and laugh.
• your favourite times are when a protective tail brushes against your back, inviting you into a long session of cuddling.
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readychilledwine · 11 months ago
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Could i request something where az and reader are mates. They have a huge fight and “break up” and reader leaves the court. She finds out that she is pregnant and writes him a letter. He never shows up so she thinks he doesn’t want the baby. Rhys visit the court she is in and sees her with a child maybe a couple months old. He is mad because she didn’t told him and when he ask her why she keeps his nephew away she tells him that she wrote az but he never answered. Rhys is mad and ask az what is up with him to just leave his pregnant mate. Unbeknownst to him that az was searching for her the whole time. Az tells him that he never got a letter and they find out that maybe elain burned it. It takes some time for them but they find their way back and just fluff azriel dad who teaches his son how to fly.
( you could write more angst between reader and az because of elain or you could use a maid or something who wants az)
Here Without You
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Summary - Being a single mother was more painful than you'd ever thought it would be, especially when your son's father was just a court away.
Warnings - Angst, Elain showing those claws, single mom status, a child, PPD and the thoughts that come with it, **edited to add** cheating
A/N - I had one of my friends who is a single mom help me with this one while also imagining my life without baby daddy, and um, yeah. We cried a lot, so hopefully, you all do too.
*message from Liz regarding the ending at the end*
💙Peep my Azriel Masterlist Here💙
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You had decided whatever you had done to offend the Mother must have been truly unforgettable and unforgivable as you sank against the wall of your family chambers in the Day Court Palace.
Being a new mother was the hardest thing you had ever and will ever do. You had finally gotten Nox down after 3 hours of fussing and tears, and now you waited. He'd sleep 2 hours if you were lucky, wake up crying, and you'd start the process over.
You had wished for your mate more times than you could count, but that bridge was long gone and burned. He had ensured of that by not coming when you wrote him, by not even bothering to write you a response.
The last fight between you and Azriel had been ugly. Glasses had been thrown, a bottle of wine knocked over in rage, cruel words you would both have to live with ringing in your ears like a scream. 350 years. Gone. Thrown away like garbage. All for Elain.
Selfish, plotting, destructive Elain.
You stood, body swaying with sleep deprivation setting in before sitting at the table where your now cold food set. You were too tired to eat, choosing to instead drink the water you had been desperately craving 4 hour ago.
You had wished you could turn it to wine, drink it with no consequences, and still feed Nox when he woke, but that was not the reality of the world. So, instead, you allowed the room temperature flavorless beverage to slide down your throat before moving like a ghost to the couch. There was no point in getting comfortable in your own bed. You would have to be up soon anyway. It wasn’t as if you had help.
You were alone.
And that wasn't even the most painful part of it.
The most painful part was setting in doubt. The growing disbelief that you weren't capable of this, that Nox deserved more, that you should have dropped him at the cabin you had no doubt Elain had moved into, leaving him with her and Azriel to allow you to-
You cut your brain off, refusing to put those words into a full thought. Refusing to believe that your disappearance or death was better for your son than this.
This had to be enough, you had to be enough, because Gods if it wasn't and you weren't, then what truly was the point in living any longer.
Helion entered your chambers the next morning, eyes falling to where you were sat on the floor, shoulders shaking as sobs tore through you. He placed a large warm hand on your shoulder before taking Nox from your arms. "I know I can not offer much of a break due to his feeding cycle, but when is the last time you ate a hot meal, y/n?"
You shook your head. He was 2 weeks old. You supposed it had been before labor. Since then, it had been moments begging for just a second of deep sleep. Moments begging for the Mother to help you, to guide you. Moments where those prayers went unanswered as if they were just thrown into a void. "I don't remember."
Helion could have killed Azriel for you, for Lucien, for Nox. He almost had when you had winnowed yourself here, collapsing in his arms from the exhaustion magic and a growing babe had caused your body.
You hadn't known when you came to the Day Court, begging your oldest friend for a week of safety and healing that you were pregnant, but the High Lord had scented it the second you appeared.
It left him wondering how the hell Azriel hadn't.
"Let me hire a wet nurse for you," he offered again, knowing you would turn it down since your depressive state had you hyper fixated in this belief that all you were good for now was your breasts, and if you gave that duty away, what purpose did you have? "At least for the next few hours. To give you time to rest?"
You still shook your head, messy, tangled hair trying to sway. "I can't. I can't burden someone else."
Helion turned his head away from you, willing himself not to cry at the emptiness of your voice, at the lifelessness you had become.
"The Night Court and Spring are coming today," he started slowly. "I am the magic selected neutral ground for Tamlin and Rhysand to begin setting a peace treaty and trade routes." He waited for your reaction, almost breaking further as you gave him none. "Do you want to see any of them?"
"Lucien and Tamlin."
Helion felt his heart shatter for Cassian, the male who had been asking about you for months now. "The general-"
"Is Azriel's brother. And probably has taken his side. Attempts to see me are probably to give him some sick sort of satisfaction."
He dropped the subject immediately. Nox was asleep, content in the High Lord's arms. "I have time before they arrive, go nap." Helion ordered it, eyes blazing a soft gold and forcing you into submission.
Your bed had never felt so soft.
Helion was walking with Nox around the Palace, smiling and cooing the little male. He was always content when he was being held, and you were so deeply asleep you hadn't even noticed Helion holding the boy to your chest as he nursed. He walked towards where Lucien and Tamlin were.
His son, his pride and joy, looked just radiant in his Day Court attire. The soft, off-white pleaded fabric draping him showed the new healthy build he had gained since Azriel and Elain's transgressions, a golden snake wrapped his bicep, new golden earrings adorned those many piercings.
Lucien paused, a look of concern etching his face when he saw Nox before shaking his head rapidly.
But it was too late, Helion was already in the room where Rhysand also stood with the Inner Circle. The Lord of Night's face fell as he looked at the Illyrian boy, looking so happy up at Helion as he dozed off.
Cassian had frozen, mid sentence with Nesta. He had tried to take a step, wanting to see the babe he immediately knew was his nephew. His eyes met Helion's pleading with permission to approach. Elain's face had paled. A mix of guilt and fear running across it before she schooled it into a faked look of hurt and sadness.
But it was Azriel's face the broke the High Lord. It was a look he knew all too well.
The look of a father who missed the birth of his child.
The look of a father who didn't know he had a child.
The look of a father mourning lost time.
Lucien moved to Helion, taking Nox before leaving the room quickly. The boy did as he always did when his head found Lucien's warm bare shoulder. He released a heavy breath, snuggling into that familiar scent and warmth. "Your mother did not call for me last night," they all heard his soft voice trailing off, speaking to their nephew softly.
"You will tell me everything I do not know," Rhysand demanded as if he was in his own court. "When the fuck was he born. Why were we not informed of her pregnancy?"
Tamlin looked to Helion, digging the shit further. "Is she in the same room as last time?" The Lord of Day nodded. "I will go see her while you all deal with this."
Helion didn't answer, walking to the centered round table and taking the head seat. "To begin, Rhysand, this is my court. You will not make demands of me in my home." They all sat, aside from Azriel. His gaze was locked on the hallway Lucien and Tamlin had gone down.
If he ran, he could catch them. He could see you. He could-
The slam of hands on a table ripped him from his thoughts, and his head snapped to Helion. The High Lord was blazing, glowing like the sun itself, heat radiating from him. "Sit. Down."
An hour later and Rhysand had the bridge of his nose pinched between his fingers. "You saw her send each letter?"
Helion rolled his eyes, nodding again. "Every month after every check up and once after the birth."
Rhys pointed to Azriel. "But you never got them?"
"My son wouldn't be in another court if I had," Azriel's voice mirrored yours. Broken, empty, mourning. Mourning what was, what he had missed and would never get back. "You're sure she sent them to me?"
Helion could have snapped his neck. "Who else would have fathered her babe? You are the one who stepped out of the bonds of marriage and mateship. Not her."
Azriel paused, a sudden look of anger gracing his face as he looked up at Elain, shadows curling his ears. Nuala appeared, setting envelopes down in front of Rhysand. "In her room. Under her bed in a locked chest. Along with every communication you had tried to send to y/n, my lord."
Feyre gasped, turning her back to Elain and leaning further into Rhysand, holding Nyx tightly between them. She remembered those first few weeks. The sleepless nights, the pain, the emotional down pour. She would not have survived without Rhysand. Without Nesta and Mor. Without Cassian and you and Azriel. Her sister, the one who had held her as darkness swallowed her mind after her son's birth, had allowed you to endure this alone.
Azriel's hands shook, reaching for that stack. He separated out the letters. 10 for him. 2 for Rhysand and Feyre. 2 for Mor. 2 for Amren. 4 for Cassian and Nesta.
Helion stood. "I will let you all process this. Call for me when you are ready to do negotiations. The sooner you all leave, the better for her."
Rhysand's eyes shot up. "You won't let us explain to her-"
"Does it change the fact that he took Elain to their marriage bed? Does it change that he signed the annulment papers." Silence filled the room. "I believe that's why she left. Correct?" Rhys grit his teeth nodding. "Then all this changes is me, someone she trusts and feels safe with right now, informing her of what happened and allowing her to decide if she wants to reach out again from that point." He made a pointed look at Elain. "Which would not matter since I cannot see you removing the parasite from your court."
Helion walked into your room to Lucien and Nox laying skin to skin, a blanket over them as Tamlin held you, long fingers running through your dark hair. "And?" His son said.
"Your mate hid the letters regarding her pregnancy." Lucien whistled. "She's a snake hiding behind beautiful scales."
Azriel had tracked down your room with his shadows easily. The inner circle had been excused for the negotiations and allowed to explore the city. Cassian had flown Elain home, Mor and Amren winnowing Nesta behind them. Cassian wanted Elain out of his house, and Azriel could not have been more grateful to his brother for having his back.
He entered the room slowly and quietly. You were placing the babe in a crib on the balcony. It was shaded from the sun, shielded to remain the perfect temperature, and yet gave him access to fresh air, to the breeze.
You turned, eyes wide the second you saw Azriel. He moved to you so quickly that you could hardly process it. One second, your feet were on the ground, and the next, arms held you tight against him. Azriel was breathing deeply, memorizing your scent all over again.
He set you down, keeping you close to his chest, and sent a prayer to the Mother. "Elain hid all the letters," he began slowly. "She kept them all in her room. I didn't know. Had I known about you, about him, I would have crawled the very depths of hell to bring you back home to me."
You didn't answer. Tears fell as your body relaxed into him. It wasn't fair. The hold he had on you. The need you still felt in your bones when he touched your skin. You ached for Azriel so deeply it echoed into your bones. You longed for his smell. His voice.
Azriel took your silence as permission to continue. "I made a mistake. I will never be able to make up for it. Elain knew the second you left, I wanted to correct this. I was so blinded by her, by the feeling of being needed like that again, that I forgot how precious your independence was. How beautiful it is."
He couldn't stop himself from kissing the top of your head. "You are all I think about. Morning, noon, and night, it is always and will always be you. I am so sorry for what I have done. I am sorry for hurting you, for ruining us, for hurting the family we should be raising together. There are no words for my remorse."
"Why?" Your voice broke as you asked. "Why wasn't I enough?"
Azriel pulled back to look at you, hand raising to hold your chin and force eye contact. "Y/n, you are not at fault for my actions. You did nothing wrong. There is no partial blame, no what ifs. I fucked up. I made a mistake and it cost both of us everything. You are the victim of my actions, not the catalyst."
He saw you process those words and saw as they sunk in. "You were and are more than I will ever deserve. I want to spend my lifetime making up for it. Becoming a male you are proud of. I want to be the father I never got to have. I want to be the husband and mate you deserve. I know it will take time, and I do not expect your forgiveness today, but if you give me a chance, I will go to my grave worshipping the ground you two walk."
"Do you want to meet our son?" He broke at the question, feeling the bond opening back on your end. "This doesn't mean we're back together. It means we need to coparent for him while we work on things." He nodded rapidly, following you to the bassinet.
It felt like the world was coming full circle. You knew it would take time, that you two had many things to discuss first. This was a needed good start, though. Your pain eased slightly as you pulled back the curtains to the crib and whispered, "Azriel, this is Nox, your son."
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@hnyclover @glitterypirateduck @slytherinindisguise @mischiefmanager @bloodicka @starsinyourseyes @the-sweet-psycho
**I have received some pretty nasty anon asks, some unconstructive comments, and a good amount of general negativity regarding this fic. If you are unhappy with the ending and want to know why I made the choices I made as the author, click #discussingherewithoutyou. Unconstructive comments will be receiving the same copy and paste answer from here forward.
My time and content are free. If you do not like them, scroll.
General Taglist:
@mariahoedt @rinalouu @sarawritestories @starryhiraeth @starswholistenanddreamsanswered @cumuluscranium
Azriel Taglist:
@elle4404
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jenicaclarisse · 6 months ago
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YUNO GRINBERRYALL
Dating the notorious Yuno!
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summary: dating the vice captain of the Golden Dawn is an experience you don’t want to let go.
genre: fluff (obvi) had to get him on here. How can he be so pretty? fanfic + headcanons cause I spoil all of you
A/N: I’m still an active member of the BC fandom and I’m thinking of making this a series. Please send requests of characters you want me to do!
;not proofread (💨)
———
Yuno isn’t the type to actively seek relationships, mostly just the type of person to reply and talk to somebody when first approached. And or somebody paired him up for a mission. So taking an interest in something other than being the best of the flock is new territory.
Getting to know him is getting to know him entirely. Despite his detached nature, Yuno is actually very open to getting to know you. Already seeing you as a romantic interest despite his goals, ambitions and dreams.
When actively entering the courting stage, Yuno is very competitive. Striving to let you know that you are one of his priorities and doesn’t see this “courting” as a one time thing. Don’t even bother speaking with other guys, Yuno will let you know he is interested.
His behavior changes, his demeanor is different too. It gets to the point his squad notices his absence after being done with a mission and is somehow nowhere to be found.
Klaus and Mimosa are naturally curious. What was he doing? What was he thinking of? Or who?
It’s perfect timing he was back in town.
“Do you think Yuno’s been disappearing lately?” Mimosa asks, walking with Klaus in the hall. She looks up at Klaus who was comically adjusting his glasses and posture.
“Yuno is responsible! We don’t need to worry! I think we should mind our own business!” Klaus shouts as he looks back at Mimosa who clearly knows better.
“You’re curious too.”
“..I’m not.”
Klaus continues to deny but is inevitably shut down. Mimosa has seen through anyway as he adjusts his glasses again with a resounding cough.
-
“Where do you think he went?” Klaus nervously asks, both he and Mimosa hiding behind a wall. Yuno looks to be waiting for somebody as he decides to indulge himself in some bread.
“Do you think we should even be spying? He’s a good man I assure you. Do you honestly think he’s being suspicious? Why do you-“
“Shhh shush!”
Mimosa puts a finger on her lip, effectively shutting Klaus up as he grumbles.
They continue to wait until they heard a voice. A magic knight from another squad! A girl…
“Yuno!” You happily greet him as you hugged him. Yuno is quick to reciprocate, patting your head as you let go of him. Yuno is seen with a soft smile as well.
“WHat!” Klaus’ voice breaks.
“Shhhh!”
Mimosa is quick to shut him up, but this time she puts a hand on his mouth to shut him up. Maybe she should’ve done the spying with a different partner.
“…They’re on a date.” Klaus surmises. After an hour pf following You and Yuno around town, he had made his conclusions. Klaus and Mimosa obnoxiously disguised themselves with accessories to prevent being recognized. Seeing the both of you holding hands and buying street food was convincing enough.
“Obviously!” Mimosa replies, holding a pair of binoculars as she continues to zoom on the both of you.
“Ahhm” You feed Yuno a piece of your crepe as he leaned down to eat his share. He goes back to his position as he hummed.
“Yummy.” Yuno wipes a piece of whipped cream from the corner of his lip.
Klaus is appalled!
Pointing and looking back to both of you, then mimosa, and again.
“Will you please calm down?” Mimosa exasperates.
“I just find it hard to believe!” Klaus is practically hyperventilating. “I didn’t take Yuno for the type!”
“He’s allowed to date.” She deadpans.
Eventually, the date comes to an end as Yuno walks you back to your headquarters. Dutifully letting you ride on his broom for more convenient travel. And an excuse to hold him (wink wink).
Both You and Yuno get off the broom as you dust yourself off. Yuno is quick to ruffle your hair again. Affectionately smiling at you as you hugged him goodbye.
“I really enjoyed my time.” Yuno tells you as you nodded.
“Thank you. It was really fun.” You smiled back at him and by the lords. You are beautiful.
Yuno gives you forehead kiss goodbye as you waved back at him and begin to enter the headquarters’ gates. Gazing at his back for a few more moments to savor more time to look at him.
You definitely have a story to tell much later.
Yuno stops in his tracks as he deadpans.
“I know you’ve been stalking me.” Yuno lets out a heavy sigh. Somebody flinches from behind a wall as a guilty Mimosa and Klaus makes their appearance. Klaus is adjusts his glasses again and clears his throat.
“We congratulate you!” He obnoxiously bows, as Mimosa scratches the back of her neck in an embarrassed manner.
“Impossible.” Yuno sighs and walked past the both of them.
“We did not think this was your after duties!” Klaus is quick to follow as well as Mimosa who right behind.
“How could you never tell us! We are your friends! Squadmates!” Klaus goes on a full rant. “We are supposed to tell each other everything! Aren’t we closer now?”
Before he gets to shout any further, Yuno was already on his broom and leaving.
“What idiots.”
———
HEADCANONS
When push comes to shove, you were eventually revealed as Yuno’s significant other. Causing an uproar with the people he was close with, particularly a certain sylph and an obnoxious person.
Needless to say Belle wasn’t the most happy. Grabbing and pulling Yuno’s face and hair in protest about getting a girlfriend. Her obvious glares towards and sometimes even stomping her feet.
“This is fairrr!!!” Belle screeches. “I was supposed to be your only love! Not that witch!” She grabs a fistful of Yuno’s cheek as she complained and complained. Glaring at you once again.
“Who even are you?!” She accuses you with a finger as you chuckled. “This isn’t a laughing matter!”
Yuno pushes away with his hand eventually, causing her to quiet down as she settles on his shoulder. She still doesn’t like you, but is afraid of Yuno’s disapproval. So she keeps put. But the jealousy is bleeding.
Meanwhile, Asta is swearing up and down like crazed man as he confront Yuno as they come across each other again.
“You jerk! You weren’t supposed to beat me in that department!” Asta holds his head as he rolled around on the ground. Passerby’s whisper as he whined. A child throwing a tantrum? Yeah. Looks like it.
Yuno merely smirks triumphantly.
“You pretty jerk!” Asta exaggerates. Continuing to get up on Yuno’s face as Yuno smirks, lifting his head up when Asta moves closer. But his screams eventually reside.
“But I’ll be wizard king! I’ll definitely surpass you!” Asta declares.
“No way.” Yuno counters.
“I’ll definitely will!” Asta is dragged off by Noelle. “Do you hear me? I definitely will!!”
Noelle slaps him across the head.
Yuno is genuinely so sweet to you as well. You cannot even deny the fact that he puts in effort to understand you more than he does with others. He makes you feel seen and heard.
And if you are the tempestuous type, he’s definitely the cool that’s gonna make you see reason.
He mostly calms you down with a gust of wind to your face and or he playfully teases you by messing your hair up.
You guys indulge in little challenges! Who gets to the end of the bridge first, who can finish a mission the fastest, or who can unlock a new spell in your grimoire. Let’s be honest, you loss on most of these things.
But Yuno lets you win from time to time, purposely running slower or maybe even challenging you to more activities. But don’t be fooled, it’s just a five second head start before he overpowers you. (Haha)
What he loves about you is that he feels comfortable around you (which is canon btw. His type is somebody who makes him feel comfortable. Which I believe you influenced that)
The fact that he can also participate in a conversation with you and or listen actively to you is his favorite past time.
He loves picnic dates because he gets to view the sky (and you)
He thinks you are the most beautiful woman in clover.
Belle still does not like you (lol) but Yuno is starting to slowly change her mind. But as of now she merely tolerates you.
Yuno absolutely loves food dates. Believe it or not he actually likes to get some scrub himself. As per charmie’s constant food she often gives. But mostly to restore his mana.
He loves trying new things with you. The relationship is rarely boring.
Whenever he’s busy he communicates with you with the communication wand. Often in private as he wonders off from the rest of his team. He definitely uses that communication device to his advantage to keep himself updated with you.
He thinks his fangirls are a pain.
Charmie wasn’t too happy with the news. She fainted with heartbreak but eventually accepted the power of the fates.
In conclusion Yuno’s a great boyfriend
———
reblogs, comments and likes are very much appreciated!
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Halloween prompts year 2 day 29
Dont get him wrong, Danny had some big feelings about finding out his mom had cheated on his dad. He had even bigger feeling about the divorce and the whole shipping him off to live with his bio dad.
He wasn't going to lie. The new school was actually really nice and he had made friends quickly, though at first it was tough to weed out the ones who just wanted to get close to the Wayne family name and not him as a person. He didn't get to chat with Tucker and Sam a whole lot due to thier schedules but he and Jazz always made time for eachother.
His life had surprisingly taken a massive upturn. Vlad had been arrested soon after Danny warned the Waynes about him, making Danny believe either his dad it felt wierd calling him that but da-Jack made it perfectly clear he should never call him that was Batmans sugar daddy or somthing or maybe the Waynes got kidnapped so much that the bats bugged the whole place. Danny hoped not, he had done a whole karaoke thing with Jazz during thier video call the other night and he really didn't want anyone to hear thier shared cat screeching.
Jazz was super happy to learn Danny had joined the Volleyball team and Astronomy club. He used to play Volleyball in middle school and played defense a lot. He was even the best on the team but he stopped playing after one too many times of his parents forgetting to show up or causing a ruckus whenever they thought a ghost was nearby.
But it was better now
The portals were shut down by the bats. The GIW where expertly obliterated from existence. His parents are getting court mandated mental help. There are no more ghosts. No more ghost hunters.
And no need for Phantom
Danny doesn't think he's ever felt this free. He could go out to eat with friends with his way too big allowance that his...dad gives him and he didn't have to worry about having to ditch them to go fight a bad guy. He could eat dinner with a family who was a little awkward but surprisingly open to him and the food was delicious and didn't attack him. He could actually sleep at night and feel safe doing it. His siblings liked spending time with him and getting to learn anout him and thier "bonus sister" Jazz.
He had no reason to use his powers.
Until the grandfather clock he was walking past swung open like a door and he locked eyes with Nightwing coming out of it. They just stared at eachother before Danny just said, "I don't want to know which one your dating. Just know I have a bat and im willing to use it in the most ungodly of ways." And walked back to his room.
He wouldn't be a superhero, but he was willing to be a supervillian to protect his new family. Or in this case make sure Nightwing, a rumored playboy, knew better than to go breaking hearts in this household.
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enviedear · 6 months ago
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oh em geeeee… honestly part of me wishes to train with him a bit. or like just watch him train,,, idk why… jace is eating at my brain for no reason. srry this isn’t a lot 😭😭😭 let me think — 🦢 (if nobody has used this one already)
i also want to train with our communal baby daddy, here's some fluffy training with jace. i hope you love it swan nonnie! enjoy the hints of societal misogyny i added in <3
request ⊹ send me your thoughts
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night grips the entirety of the red keep, castle almost eerily quiet. you glance around your chambers, heart pounding. the court expects you to be confined to traditional duties—embroidery, etiquette, and endless tea lunches. despite your betrothal to the future king, education for your regency remains lackluster.
but tonight, you have other plans.
carefully, you slip out of your chambers, the soft rustle of your plainclothes barely audible. you navigate the winding corridors with practiced ease, the flickering torchlight casting long shadows on the stone walls.
each step bringing you closer to the training grounds, where your betrothed awaits.
as you approach, the sound of steel clashing and the grunts of exertion reach your ears. you quicken your pace, eager to see him. rounding the corner, you spot jacaerys in the courtyard, his sword slicing through a practice dummy with precision. he looks every bit the warrior prince, his dark hair falling into his eyes as he moves.
"you're late." he teases, a playful glint in his eyes when he sees you.
"i had to make sure no one saw me… or followed me." you reply, grinning. "wouldn't want to ruin my prince's reputation with my unladylike behavior."
jacaerys laughs, the sound warm and genuine. he steps forward, handing you a practice sword. "let's see if your skills have improved, my lady."
you take the sword, feeling its weight in your hands. despite the countless hours of secret training, the weapon still feels foreign compared to the delicate quilting needles you're expected to master.
but as you face jacaerys, determination sets in. you refuse to be underestimated.
he takes a offensive stance, and you mirror him. the first clash of your swords sends a shiver down your spine. the thrill of combat, the crash of steel—it’s intoxicating.
jace had mentioned the fact the first night he decided to train you. he was adamant, talking out of his head, rash yet horribly kind.
your prince has never fully bent for the rules. while the rest of court frowned upon their future queen welding the weapon of men, your love did not. he seeks only to encourage you.
jacaerys pushes you, sending you backwards, testing your limits. his movements are fluid, graceful even, but he holds back, allowing you to find your rhythm.
"you've improved!" he says, parrying a particularly aggressive strike. "but you still leave your left side vulnerable."
you huff, annoyed at his observation. "show me how to fix it, then."
with a grin, jacaerys steps closer, his eyes locked onto yours. he adjusts your stance, his hands firm and guiding. "like this..." he murmurs, his breath warm against your ear. your heart skips a beat, the proximity of his body sending a jolt of electricity through you.
you nod, trying to focus on his instructions. he steps back, and you both resume your positions. this time, you're ready. when he strikes, you deflect, moving with more confidence.
slowly, jace’s hits grow less suppression— his eyes alight as you begin to match his pace. his true equal.
jace finally errs, striking out hastily and allowing your to draw back. quickly, and before he can recover, you leap forward and strike him. your swords’ edge pressing lightly into his practice chestplate. you lower your sword, panting. jacaerys stands opposite you, a proud smile on his lips.
"using my own teachings against me." he says, voice filled with admiration. "should i be wary of your true plans with these lessons?”
you laugh, shaking your head. "never, my prince. i simply mean to protect at your side."
he steps closer, his expression softening. "that's all i could ask for." he whispers.
"perhaps one day." you reply, a smirk playing on your lips. "save you ever entertain the notion of a mistress."
jacaerys chuckles, a twinkle in his eyes. "i would sooner seek the fate of dragonfire."
you can't help the foolish smile your lips curve into, “i’ll hold you to your promise, my prince."
he bows slightly, his dark hair falling back from his face. "i eagerly make this oath,” he looks up at you, soft smirk on his face, “my queen.”
you pull him into a hug, free of the watchful eyes of the usually bustling castle. he melts into your embrace, agile hands finding home at the small of your back. the pair of you stay like that for a while, fueled purely by each others company.
"i should probably head back before someone realizes i'm missing," you say reluctantly, already dreading the return to your stifling halls.
jacaerys nods, understanding flickering in his gaze. "until next time then, my lady. on time, perhaps?"
with a roll of your eyes and a soft smile, you hand back the practice sword and turn to leave. you feel his eyes watch you as you disappear into the castle’s walls—and somehow, the knowledge of that feels much more powerful than any weapon.
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yaksha-lover · 9 months ago
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Thus Always to Tyrants
Summary: Lilia has always been an enigma to you; slipping through your fingers at every attempt to get close - follows fae!reader’s relationship with lilia from childhood to the war to present day in briar valley
Lilia Vanrouge x Fae!Reader, small background Meleanor x reader hehe
wc: 3.8k
cw: i’m too into medieval fantasy so i created unnecessary lore (clown noises), also i haven’t read book 7 so prob butchered canon, (but spoilers), angst, grief, unrequited (?) love, pining, mild description of war events/tragedy
Even then, he hadn’t seen you. Before the wars and before the bloodshed, when there’d only been long grass to tickle your ankles and azure skies allowing you to guess at clouds, Lilia had never seen you.
There’d always been something, someone, to distract him.
At least, that’s what you tell yourself. It’s easier this way, to imagine that there’s something other than disinterest and disgust keeping you apart.
The forests of Briar Valley are filled with pine trees, their scent so potent you wished you could bottle the air and take it home.
That was where you and Meleanor had met Lilia. You’d grown up in the royal castle, the two of you spending afternoons giggling about the latest court gossip and eating all the sweets you could before the queen could scold her daughter.
That day is one of your fondest memories, and not entirely because of him. The trunk of the giant oak tree was hard against your back, but you hadn’t been able to think about anything but the feel of your princess’ head in your lap. She’d simply closed her eyes and demanded you read to her, dark hair spilling around your legs.
“As you wish, Mel,” you’d agreed, gathering up one of her favourite books.
She’d only popped an eye open to tease you. “Mel, is it? Not princess? Perhaps I should have you punished for such transgressions~” She giggled.
“If I am to be placed in the dungeon, then who will feed you ice cream and read to you, dear princess?” you countered, ruffling her hair.
“Hmm, I suppose your insubordination will have to forgiven…but only if you allow me to remain on your lap for an adequate amount of time. Any sooner, and I’ll have to punish you myself~”
She was temperamental yet whimsical, delighting you as much as she terrified you. Mostly, Meleanor was your best friend. Your only friend, truly. There weren’t many children your age around the castle; you were only there because your father sat on the high council as the master of coin.
After you’d been reading aloud to her for some time, a sudden rustle in the trees caught the both of you off guard. The princess had jumped up quickly, all the combat lessons she’d taken with the head of the Queen’s guard finally paying off.
Out from the vegetation, a short, dark-haired fae who looked to be around your age emerged. He was fitted in what could only be described as rags; torn and stained all over. Despite his disheveled look, you thought he had a certain charm about him.
Meleanor, who’d grown taller than you ages ago, towered over him. It was almost a pitiful sight.
The princess had narrowed her eyes and asked: “Where have you come from?”
“Nowhere,” he’d answered simply, looking down at his feet. “I’m no one.”
That was the meekest you’d ever seen him, no indication of his true vibrant personality.
From that day in the forest, Lilia had been with you. Meleanor had begged the queen to let him stay in the castle, to grow up with you and her as another companion. The princess’ tears worked especially well on her mother, so of course she’d gotten her way.
As she grew up, the princess only became more and more beautiful. You weren’t the only one who noticed, either. The three of you were still young at the time, but Lilia seemed fond and more than fond of Meleanor. The princess returned his affections, but perhaps not with the same intent; she almost smote him when he’d jokingly proposed to her with a ring of grass. It made you angry, for a while. She was your friend first, and now Lilia had come to hog all her time and attention.
It was hard to see your only friend pulled in a new direction, especially one that seemed so far away from you. That was back when you were small; things settled quickly after that, with the three of you falling easily into friendship. There would still be times, occasionally, when you were envious of the friendship shared by Meleanor and Lilia, but it was on both ends. You simply wished to be included, not to have the princess or Lilia all to yourself. That was never a possibility, after all.
As you grew, it wasn’t long before Meleanor fell in love with Levan. You’d been…annoyed, at first, at how fast your friend had seemed to leave you behind yet again.
“You promised to take me flying today, dear princess,” you’d said, trying and failing to keep the gloom out of your voice. “Don’t you remember?”
Meleanor looked up from brushing her hair, making eye contact with you through the mirror. “Forgive me, I cannot turn away Levan…my heart will not let me.”
“But it will let you turn me away?”
She turned now, facing you directly, some of her signature anger evident in her expression. Her violent temper only seemed her grow with her adolescence. “Stop this foolishness! You are my friend, but Levan is my beloved. If you find issue with that, you will leave my castle at once.”
As though you couldn’t feel more humiliated, she’d moved, stopping in front of you and tilting your chin to meet her gaze. “Do you understand?”
“Yes,” you’d whispered, wondering when things had changed.
And then she’d pulled you into her arms, and suddenly she’d felt all too familiar again, hugging you and telling you she loved you, asking you to always stay by her side. As her dearest friend.
Being cold to Levan only pushed you further from Meleanor, so you were forced to accept his presence. Once the initial hostility dissipated, you found that Levan was quite pleasant.
If Meleanor was always destined to be with another, then you were happy it was someone as great as Levan, at the very least. With your princess’ time now being taken up by her lover, you and Lilia spent much more time alone together than before.
The first time you had the courage to broach the subject of marriages and pairings had done nothing but splash the cold water of Lilia’s indirect rejection on to you. With how cold and empty you felt, it was as though the shivers went bone deep.
Your father had insisted on looking for a match for you. A political marriage to improve your family’s standing, surely. You had protested and held it off as long as you could, but now his asks were becoming unavoidable.
You’d thought - hoped - that Lilia might be interested. He wouldn’t be your father’s number one choice, but he would still accept it; Lilia may not have been of noble birth, but his status as a respected general amongst the court bought him points. Marrying him would certainly be better than any stuffy old fae you’d be forced to settle down with.
It wasn’t just avoiding others, either. You wanted Lilia, as loathe as you were to admit. He was your friend, a close companion, and perhaps you’d even desired more.
It was difficult to voice to yourself that your affections went beyond platonic when you were not so delusional as to imagine that he felt the same in any way.
No, you felt like an afterthought to Lilia. As though you were merely Meleanor’s friend, and not his own. He wasn’t so kind to you as he was the princess, and the affection he held for her, although now platonic, went beyond anything you could imagine receiving from him. Even Levan seemed to bond with him easier than you had after knowing him for years. It was like he tolerated you more than anything; when Meleanor was off with Levan, you were the only option left.
It shouldn’t have hurt so much when he said he didn’t wish to marry. The ‘you’ part seemed unspoken, even though he claimed reasons of freedom and lifestyle instead of saying anything about you.
Regardless, he’d made the decision for you. Your father would ship you away from the castle, to be married to a stranger, leaving behind your beloved…friends.
At least he would have, had the war not begun so suddenly.
-
If you believed Lilia had hardened his heart to you before, then becoming a war general had hardened his heart to the world. Although it was the last thing on anyone’s minds, had you tried to bridge the gap between the two of you, not only would you have failed, but you might’ve gained a nice scar along with it.
To the untrained eye, Lilia seemed to thrive on the battlefield; swift with strength that went unmatched by any. But you knew better. There was a sense in which Lilia lost himself in action, where he seemed so distant from the boy you’d grown up with; perhaps it was his own way of coping with the horrors he’d been forced to experience, fae he fought alongside being slaughtered. In the end, it hadn’t mattered who they were before the battlefield; nobles and common folk alike fought and fell.
It was torturous to wait out the war in the castle. Every letter that came made your heart race, fear taking ahold as you read through the list of your fallen companions. It almost seemed inevitable that one day Lilia or Levan might appear on the list and send you into despair. Your only saving grace was Meleanor, the two of you keeping quiet company during this time, both not allowed to join the conflict and feeling useless for it.
You begged your father to let you join Lilia; you weren’t the most skilled fighter, but your healing magic excelled beyond any other, and you could hold your own for the most part. He’d denied you until so many had been lost that the queen asked for your service. None of you had known just how close tragedy was, how your departure for Lilia’s camp would mean leaving behind your beloved princess to die.
-
“Go back,” Lilia had growled at you. It was the very first thing he’d said since you’d come to his camp.
“I’m here to help, instead of rotting away in the castle while my people suffer!” You’d followed after him as he strutted between tents, giving orders to the other soldiers.
He’d shook his head, glaring at you. “You’re a spoiled little noble, you know nothing of the battlefield. Go back home. It’s not safe here.”
“I know I’m sheltered, but I’d like to try and help where I can! I don’t care what happens to me.”
Lilia stopped in his tracks, not facing you as he spoke.
“You don’t care? You’re selfish, you know that? What would Meleanor do without you? What would I-” He shook his head. “I don’t have time for this. Go back. Don’t make me make you.”
“Perhaps I am selfish, but what about me, Lilia? Shouldn’t it matter that I can’t possibly imagine a life where we’re not together, fighting side by side?” Your voice goes quiet. “I had a dream, an awful dream. One where you were dead…I’m afraid. I don’t want that dream to become real.”
You’d thought, for a moment, that his hardened gaze had wavered, but the next second, he’d ordered one of his subordinates to take you back to the castle. Perhaps the softness you believed you saw within him was only a trick of the light.
-
You’d been a fool. A fool in grief and despair, but a fool nonetheless.
Meleanor’s death had pulled you away from yourself, made you into some automaton which possessed none of your good qualities, for which you had to wonder if there were any to begin with. She’d been your friend, your only family. You should’ve been with her; you should’ve died with her. You should’ve done anything you could, and you’d failed.
It was only by a day that you’d left the castle and missed the fight that occurred.
Meleanor fought bravely, a knight had told you. And Meleanor died.
You waited for Lilia to come back. To come home to you. Your heart sang, a brief reprieve from all the aching when you found out he was alive; he was all you had left.
He never came, at least not to see you.
You fled the castle. There’d been no goodbyes to your father and no concern for Meleanor’s child.
If she’d been around, she surely would have killed you for your selfishness, but your head swam with grief and so you left everything behind.
-
It had been…surprising, to hear from Malleus. You’d heard amidst your travels that your father still sat on the small council, so perhaps he’d heard of you from him, considering they were together in Briar Valley. Who else would have known about you and your relationship with his mother?
There was General Vanrouge, but he…why would he even mention you at this point?
You’d taken to calling him that in your mind, if only to distance yourself a little more from your past. You heard he’d returned to Briar Valley years after you’d departed, but other than acting as a guardian for the prince and a curious human boy, you had no idea what he was up to.
It was a wonder the world was as big as it was, meaning you’d never run into the general during your travels.
And here, on the desk of your hostel, sat a letter from the crown prince. Your Meleanor’s son. The one you’d left behind.
With the distance of time, a new feeling stirs in your chest. One of unease and shame, yet another failure to the Draconia’s. You hoped the boy was doing well. Would it even be possible to accept if he wasn’t?
Well, he was asking, along with Meleanor’s mother, that you pay them a visit once again. The Queen…you’d abandoned her too, in a way. You dared not hope that she thought of you as another one of her children, but in a way, you’d loved her as a mother.
Heat burned at your cheeks. With your focus on Meleanor, Lilia, and Levan, you’d forgotten there were more people you considered your family. More people that you’d left behind in Briar Valley.
After all this time, you owed them an explanation, no, an apology. You owed them your return home.
-
Malleus greets you at the gates.
You’re stunned, for a moment. Dark locks of long hair sprawled elegantly across his shoulders, two curved horns peaking out from his head. Piercing green eyes that look into your soul.
He’s the spitting imagine of your best friend.
You try to move forward, but a green-haired fae stops you in your tracks, moving between you and Malleus.
“Keep your distance! Have some respect for your Prince!”
Malleus is quick to shake his head. “Leave them be, Sebek. This is Lord Tyrell’s child. My mother’s childhood friend.”
Sebek is quick to step-aside, bowing before you in apology, allowing you to step forward and hug Malleus. He’s motionless for a moment, and you’re worried you’ve crossed his boundaries, before he slowly slides his arms around your back, returning the hug.
“The resemblance between you and your mother…it is truly incredible. Pardon me for getting emotional, but I wasn’t expecting you to look so grown up…last I saw, you were merely an egg.”
He looks at you, smiling gently. “It’s nice to meet a friend of my mother’s. I feel I hardly know anything about her. Even Lilia refuses to speak of her.”
Your heart stirs at the mention of your former friend’s name. “I hope I can provide some memories of her.” You look away from him. “I only wish I could’ve done so sooner…I apologize, Malleus. I should have been here for you, just as Lilia was. I should have taken care of you, not left you behind when you were only a child…”
He shakes his head once again. “You are here now. That is all that matters.”
“Thank you, I hardly deserve your kindness.”
He returns your smile. “It is what my mother would have wished for, is it not?”
-
He leads you through the halls of the castle, but you wouldn’t have needed his help to get around. Every wall in the castle is burned into your brain, engrained with a variety of memories.
The halls are vastly the same as you remember; the same silver trim, the velveteen carpets, and the Draconia sigil hung on banners.
Only one thing stands out as different to you: there’s one more portrait than before.
Normally the Draconia family portraits were done about every century, so it made sense that one had been added semi-recently. This one is just of Malleus and Maleficia, occupying a rather empty-looking frame. Even if you didn’t know about Meleanor and Levan, you would know something was missing from it.
Your train of thought is interrupted by the appearance of a Silver-haired boy. He pauses to stare at you for a moment before smiling.
“You must be MC. Father has told me so much about you.” He bows lightly.
“You’re Silver? Lilia’s boy?” You take his hands in yours. “It’s very nice to meet you.”
“And you as well. We’ve promised to help some of the younger knights with their training, so Sebek and I won’t be able to stay for dinner, but I hope you’ll stick around. It would be nice to hear about you from more than the stories my father shares.”
“I’ve been gone so long, I certainly intend to stay for a while. Maybe I’ll be able to tell you some stories of your father when he was younger.”
With a nod, Silver is off.
Malleus leads you into the dining room and you catch your first glimpse of Lilia Vanrouge in over a century.
-
He’s different and the same, all at once. He’s maintained his youthful looks, but his hair has radically changed; cropped and pink, where it once flowed in its red glory.
You turn to greet Maleficia first, bowing in front of her. “It is an honour to dine with you, your grace.”
“Stop that nonsense. Come to me, my dear. It’s been ages since I’ve seen you.”
The queen embraces you gently in her frail frame.
“I am truly sorry,” you whisper.
“It’s already forgotten,” she whispers back. “The past is the past, and we are here now. Please, take a seat, so we may dine together once again.”
Maleficia and Malleus sit at the head of the table on each side, so you take your place across from Lilia.
“It’s nice to see you again,” you offer.
“You as well,” Lilia replies, seemingly at a loss.
The dinner proceeds, Maleficia and Malleus asking questions about your travels. Lilia chimes in occasionally, but he’s uncharacteristically silent. Or perhaps characteristically? You hardly know him anymore, after all.
Once the final course comes and goes, Maleficia stands from the table. “Malleus, let us take our tea in the garden today. I believe these two have a lifetime of catching up to do.”
With that, the two of them are off.
-
“I missed you.” You don’t intend the words to come, but they spill out of your heart anyway.
“As did I.”
You fidget with the cutlery in front of you. “You’re still so formal with me after all this time. Have we truly become strangers?”
“You could never be a stranger to me. Not a day has gone by without you being in my thoughts.”
“And yet you never went looking for me. You returned to the castle only after I left, starting a family, raising Silver and Malleus…”
“They needed me. You know that.”
“You left me. You were all I had left after…I would have done anything, followed you anywhere. I would have helped you take care of Silver, Malleus. But you left without saying a thing.”
“I never knew…”
“Of course you did. Everyone did.”
“Nothing good would have come from us being together.”
“At least you’re finally being honest about your feelings. If you hated me as I feared, you should have sent me away the moment I came.”
“Hate? No, it was never like that. The distance between us…it seemed quite impossible to traverse.”
“Distance? We grew up in the same castle for hundreds of years…”
“That’s not what I was referring to.”
“Then to what?”
“You know how they all thought of me. The senate, your father, all believed I never deserved to be so close to you and Mel-” Lilia takes a moment to breathe. “To you and the princess.”
The mention of her name has you squeezing your eyes closed. Even after hundreds of years, it hurts to remember your beloved friend, her sweet memory tainted with the despair of her death. “Why does it matter what they thought?”
“They never would have allowed it. You know that.”
“No, that’s not true. My father said…”
“He lied. He was the first to send me away after her death.”
“He what? I- I was told you left, torn apart by grief.”
“I was in pain, but I always planned to return home…return to you. But the senate, they declared that there was no place at court for me anymore. That I failed- I failed at protecting Meleanor.”
A short silence rings between you. It’s perhaps the first time either of you have heard her name said aloud in centuries.
“I’m sorry,” you say. “I never knew.”
“I never wanted you to. I’d rather you hate me than your family.”
“I understand. But you were my family, too. Perhaps the only one who truly had my best interests in mind and not some political scheming or such. And now look at you: Silver, Sebek, Malleus. Against all odds, you’ve found yourself a new family.” While I’ve ended up alone, you don’t say.
“You know I’ve always said, families are better the bigger they are. Perhaps it’s far too late, but-”
“Later’s better than never.”
A moment of understanding passes between you two, perhaps for the first time.
“Your hair…you look quite different from when I last saw you.”
“Hmm, Red was going out of style, I suppose. Although I’m sure you wish I hadn’t changed it. You always did prefer red.”
You shake your head softly. “Perhaps in the past, but we’ve both changed, haven’t we? No, I was going to say that it becomes you.”
The silence that settles between you is filled by an exchange of gentle smiles and a skimming of one hand over the other, until the two finally link together.
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shytastemakerthing · 6 months ago
Note
hi!! How are you? I hope you have a great day! ^^
Ngl, i'm in love with the Albino!reader series
So, can you do a Albino!reader with a pomefiore dorm (like imagine Vil first time meeting them) orr a diasomnia dorm (some of them might think that they are a fae) orr maybe Rollo (he might think that Albino!reader is an angel at first)? (You can pick one you like or all, it's fine!)
Thank you! And keep it up with your writting talent! ( ^∀^)
A/N: We are now on dorm number 4 with our albino!reader series! I am so glad that you guys are rather liking this one, I am enjoying it as well! As I have already done Pomefiore dor, I will be doing Diasomnia + Rollo for this request!
Tw: None
Request: Diasomnia family + Rollo with albino!reader
Headers and dividers made by @blueberry-pride and @cafekitsune
(I apologize for the constant tags, I simply wish to give credit for the lovely headers and dividers :) )
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Instantly captivated by you the first time he had laid upon your form
It was late in the night, the moon high in the sky when he had first seen you out walking along an older pathway that was slightly hidden underneath overgrown vegetation
Underneath the light of the silver moon, the flickering of fireflies, he found himself utterly speechless and completely drawn to you
At first, he thought you to be a diurnal fae, until he gazed upon your very human ears
Albinism you say?
It was the first he had heard of such a condition
And the light of the sun and the heat that it emits can be very dangerous for you? Damage your skin and your eyes?
Well, that just won't do
Hence why you are often seen more around Diasomnia (after managing to talk him out of keeping the sun away as we know how this fae's mood can affect the weather)
It is usually quite dark there and there is a certain chill in the air that should keep you nice and safe
Simply say the word and you will have a full, new wardrobe that will cater to keeping your skin safe from the sun
He grows to enjoy each visit you grace him with, looking forward to each one
Yes, his grandmother knows of you
And yes, she wishes to see you when her beloved grandson invites you to Briar Valley during the next school break
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This fae is essentially 700 years old, you are not the first person he has seen with albinism
But you are certainly the first he has seen where he nearly mistook you for a Diurnal fae. Everything about you just radiated the presence of one
But when you were now facing him, able to see your human eyes and ears, he was pleasantly surprised
Will absolutely charm you to the moon and back without hesitation, he has no shame
Will be the epitome of a gentleman, and you will have the pleasantries of being courted the old fashioned way in fae culture
At his age, there is no time to dally around, and Lilia finds himself fully captivated by you
Do you like children?
Also, keep him away from the kitchen and do not eat anything he has made if you value your life
He often invites you for tea in the Diasomnia lounge room, something the both of you rather enjoy
Oftentimes, when you fall asleep when with one another, he allows a gentle smile to come to his face, brushing your hair back before holding you close
Perhaps you would like to travel with him? With his life soon drawing to a close, there is no one else he would rather spend it with (aside from silver, that is)
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He has heard the tales of Diurnal fae from essentially everyone in his family, from Lilia, others in Briar Valley, and even in books that he has read
And from afar, everything about your appearance screamed that you were, in fact, a Diurnal fae
One whose beauty that could be described as ethereal
......what do you mean you're human?
You, a full blooded human, look more akin to a fae, than him, someone who is half-fae
No, he is not mad.....
Maybe a bit self conscious about it, but not angry
.....are you sure that you have no fae lineage in your blood? It was always a possibility
Albinism?
Ah, he had briefly heard of such a condition, but had never seen it before with his own eyes
Instantly thought that Diasomnia would be the best place for you after hearing about the damage that the sun and heat can do to you
Gathered advice from Lilia
Good or bad, you can decide
But you two are often either seen in Diasomnia together in the lounge with small snacks discussing books or in the library further away from the windows studying
Has offered his jacket to you on more than one occasion to cover your skin from the sun
You complimented his skill as a knight (in training), and how much for a gentleman he was, you instantly saw him fighting that grin on his face as he straightened himself up quite a bit
Lilia commented that he looked like the cat that just got the cream once he was back at the dorm
Was this how his mother felt when she fell in love with his father?
He will have to inquire more information for the future
Always commented on how Briar Valley would be the perfect place to be. The weather was cooler, and the sun wasn't as bright. Even then, the forests helped to block sunlight in most places
Not to mention, he thought you would look absolutely stunning in Briar Valley clothing
Already planning on getting pictures, he wants to carry one around with him like the knights of old did with their loved ones when they were sent out
Perhaps you would like to come with him back home during winter break?
His mother is absolutely dying to meet the human who has softened her son's heart
The entire family is (even good old grandpa Baul)
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Sevens, help anyone who manages to see both of you together. Between his calm aura and gentle beauty, and your ethereal glow, there's no doubt that you two are seen as the most captivating on campus (even Vil believes that after seeing both of you together)
It all started when he was returning from club activities, on the verge of falling asleep once more before something rather bright caught his eye
For once, it woke this man up as he made his way over to see who happened to be behind such an image
Only to see you, moving to sit in a meadow underneath a tree, pulling out a book, seeming to relax
Thought you to be a fae first as well, Diurnal, in fact based on your appearance
But after correcting him, he let a slight smile come to his face
Seeing the drowsy look return to his eyes, you offered a spot for him to lay, he did, you read, and the rest was history
Silver always helped to keep you protected from the sun, covering your shoulders with his jacket, informing you of the weather for the day, and anything in between
His father raised him to be a gentleman
You are often seen accompanying him to various places, even helping him after he had just fallen asleep
Lilia is begging you to marry his son already, you are literally perfect
Perhaps you would like to join Silver on a trip back home? He is certain you would quite like the quaint little cottage he calls home
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An angel, that is the first thing that came to his mind the moment that he first laid eyes upon you
It was weeks after what happened during the Glorious Masquerade when he found himself now at NRC
He was still trying to find his way around this rather large school (he really underestimated the size of this college, especially when taking into account the pocket dimensions that held the dorms), when he first saw you walking through the courtyard with a parasol over your head and books in your other hand
Everything about you seemed to just be glowing
Oh
....oh
You're looking in his direction
No
You're looking at him
That smile would be the end of him, he could see it all happening now. and now you are walking towards him
Is he lost?
What did he do to be blessed with your presence?
Thus, he found himself being led by you to class and after, a full tour to help him remember where everything was
It was where he asked if you truly were an angel
Tried not to be disappointed when you denied, discovering that you had merely been born with albinism
Well, it looks like there was more to you than what he had first thought
Perhaps you would like to join him one day in the City of Flowers? He is certain that you would enjoy yourself, he would make sure of that, himself.
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Thank you for your request! Is it easy to tell who was my favorite? Have a wonderful day/night!
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j-k-writes · 3 months ago
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The Bronze Targaryen - 6
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Summary - The year 115 AC brings about many changes in Westeros.
Warnings - character death, childbirth, general HOTD warnings
The bed was cold when (Y/N) awoke. He reached out to where Rhaenyra was laying, only to find empty sheets. He groaned, burying his face in the pillow. 
“I’m over here.” Rhaenyra said, hearing his movements. He mumbled into the pillow in response. “What was that?” 
(Y/N) turned onto his back, “It is too early for you to be up.” 
Rhaenyra stood, walking over to the bed. “It is nearly midday.” 
“Oh.” 
Rhaenyra sat down next to him on the bed, “Oh.” 
He sat up on his elbows. “Why didn’t you wake me?” 
She reached out, running her fingers through his messy hair. “You looked like you needed sleep.” 
(Y/N) smirked, sitting up further and grabbing Rhaenyra, pulling her onto his lap. She yelped indignantly, smacking him lightly on his chest as he laughed. He pressed a kiss to her lips, and she smiled against his mouth. “I think we both need sleep.” 
“That is not what I meant and you know it.” 
He pulled back, “I am fine.” 
“You have not been sleeping well,” Rhaenyra said. “You have been stressed since your cousins left.” 
“I am just worried about my grandsire. He is not well.” 
“And Gunthor.” 
(Y/N) shook his head, “Do not worry about him.” Rhaenyra frowned, opening her mouth but before she could speak (Y/N) captured her lips in his. He pulled away, resting his forehead against Rhaenyra’s. “If you worry about him, I must worry about him. And I do not wish to, I want to just be here with you.” 
Rhaneyra frowned, but nodded nonetheless. She untangled their legs, standing up and grabbing (Y/N)’s hand. “You should eat.” 
He broke his fast as Rhaenyra’s handmaidens moved in and out of the room, helping Rhaenyra properly dress and leaving clothes out for (Y/N). Rhaenyra helped (Y/N) dress when she was finished. They did not leave the room after they were finished, they had not been asked to court since their wedding. (Y/N) did not mind the break from the court, allowing him to spend his days in the yard and with Harwin, checking on the knight’s wounds. Rhaenyra did not share his indifference, feeling like once again her father was neglecting her role as heir. She refused to listen to (Y/N) when he tried to soothe her worries, but (Y/N) could not blame her. The two heirs were in different situations and (Y/N) had only words to offer in ways of comfort. 
Ser Erryk entered the room, drawing the attention of the two teens. “Prince Daemon is here to see you both.” 
Rhaenrya looked to (Y/N) who nodded, before speaking, “Let him in.”
(Y/N) frowned at his father’s demeanor as he entered the room, waiting for the door to close behind him before opening his mouth to speak. “A raven came for you, (Y/N).” 
(Y/N) gestured for his father to hand it over, and as his father placed the letter in his hand he said, “You must leave for Runestone at once.” 
(Y/N)’s heart dropped, and he opened the parchment. 
Prince (Y/N), 
It is with a heavy heart that I write to you. Your grandsire, Lord Yorbert, Lord of Runestone, passed during the hour of the owl. He went peacefully, and he is with your ancestors now. I am aware you are in the first days of marriage, but with your grandsire’s passing you are now the Lord of Runestone. 
Maester Pate 
“Your cousins have not yet reached the Vale.” Daemon spoke. “If you take Vermithor you will get there to claim your seat before they even cross The Trident.” 
“Claim your seat?” Rhaenyra looked between the two men, and (Y/N) handed her the letter. She read it quickly, eyes widening as she took in the words. 
“You must claim your seat.” 
“Uncle his grandsire has just died,” Rhaenyra objected. “Let him mourn, the politics of the realm-” 
“This is not about the politics of the realm.” Daemon spat, turning to (Y/N). “This is about taking your rightful place before Gunthor learns about your grandsire’s death.” 
Rhaenyra frowned, “(Y/N) is the rightful heir, Gunthor would not be so bold as to try to undermine that.” 
Daemon gave his son a pointed look, and (Y/N) sighed letting his hand fall into his hands. He did not know his cousin’s intentions, he did not trust him, but a simple feeling did not prove anything. In fact he barely knew his cousin, having only met him half a dozen times in his youth, but the unfamiliarity only fuled his distrust.
He rubbed his face, groaning, “I cannot take that chance. I must leave for Runestone.” 
Daemon nodded, “I will make sure your things are packed.” 
Daemon turned on his heel, walking out of the room. Rhaenyra turned to her husband as soon as the doors were shut. “I am coming with you.” 
“You must stay here-” 
“You are my husband.” Rhaenyra stood, standing directly in front of where (Y/N) was sitting. “I should be at your side.” 
(Y/N) sighed, reaching his hand out and Rhaenyra gently grasped it. He looked at Rhaenyra, “You are the heir to the Iron Throne. You are already uncertain of your place in this court. I do not know how long I will be at Runestone, but you cannot afford to be away from court for too long, not now.” 
Rhaenyra scoffed, and (Y/N) continued, standing up from his seat, “I will fly to Runestone on Vermithor. I will secure my seat, our future child’s seat, and then when that business is done I will return to you.” 
Rhaenyra cupped his cheek, bringing their foreheads together. “Take what is yours, and then return to me.”
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“Lord Royce.” 
(Y/N) looked up from the books he was looking over, placing down his quill. The boy standing at the door looked between (Y/N) and Maester Pate nervously, holding a piece of parchment in his hand.(Y/N) recognized him as the young page that had been attending to Maester Pate in the rookery. 
Maester Pate cleared his throat, “Well, what is it?” 
“There is a raven for Lord Royce.” 
“Give it here.” (Y/N) waved the boy over. The boy placed the rolled up parchment on the desk. “What is your name?” 
“Jasper, my lord. I mean- my prince.” 
(Y/N) chuckled, “My lord is fine, thank you, Jasper.” 
Jasper bowed, practically tripping over himself to run out of the room. (Y/N) picked the parchment up between two fingers, it bore the seal of House Targaryen. He’d received many ravens from Kingslanding in his absence, many from his father, the most from Rhaenyra. 
He kept them both updated on the situation in Runestone. Not that there was much to update, Gunthor was still playing an active role in the governance of the keep, much to (Y/N)’s frustration. He had no real proof that the man was up to anything, other than his odd actions during his grandsire’s final months and the queasy feeling that settled in (Y/N)’s gut anytime the man opened his mouth. 
He picked his dagger up off the table, carefully prying off the wax seal before unrolling the parchment and reading the letter. 
Valzȳrys, 
I hope you are well, and that Runestone is prospering. 
I have been quite ill these past few weeks, the maesters could determine no cause. Until last week. 
My maids were dressing me when Elinda pointed out that my dress did not lace as tightly as it had before, and that I had not bled since before the wedding. Immediately the maester was called, and it is Grand Maester Mellos opinion that I am with child. He estimates that I am in my second moon of pregnancy, and my father already suspects the babe will be a boy.
I apologize for not writing of the news sooner, but to tell the truth when I first heard the news, and even now, I am not sure how I feel. I am overjoyed at the idea of a child with the best features of us both, a future dragonrider, and the future heir to The Iron Throne. But my mother died on the birthing bed, and suffered long before then through countless unsuccessful births. I do not wish to die in a puddle of my own blood as she did. But despite my fears, I am happy with the news, as surprising as it is, and I hope that you share my feelings. 
I think of you every night, and miss your presence by my side. 
Olvie jorrāelagon, 
Rhaenyra 
(Y/N) read the parchment three times, dissecting every word written by his wife. He looked up at where Maester Pate was still standing. “Bring me my cousin.” 
“Gunthor?” 
“Gerold, Pate.” 
The maester bowed, exiting the room, and (Y/N) sighed leaning back in his chair. He resigned himself to getting no more work done today, and started to put the books away. When Gerold entered (Y/N) did not speak, he simply handed him the letter and watched his cousin’s face as he took in its contents. 
“I wish to return to Kingslanding.” (Y/N) said when it was clear his cousin was finished. 
“Of course.” Gerold said. “I do not blame you.” 
(Y/N) bit his lip, pinching the bridge of his nose. 
“Will you not be returning?” Gerold asked, taking in his younger cousin’s tense posture. 
“What do you think of Gunthor?” (Y/N) asked, deciding it was better to be blunt than to beat around the bush. Especially if he wanted to make his decision. 
Gerold paused, opening his mouth and closing it multiple times as if he was struggling to articulate his answer. 
“Speak honestly, cousin. I will not fault you for your opinions.” 
His cousin took a deep breath, “I do not know what to think.” 
(Y/N) motioned for him to elaborate. 
“I had not seen him in years until your grandsire fell ill. I wanted to write to you to tell you of his illness, since as his chosen heir it would’ve been your place to take over the responsibilities of Runestone. But your cousin Gunthor urged me not to disturb you.” 
(Y/N) nodded, “Can I trust you, Gerold?” 
“Of course.” 
“I fear Gunthor may have ambitions above his station. I cannot prove it but-” He paused, unsure of how to continue.
“You do not feel comfortable leaving Runestone unsure of his intentions.” His cousin finished, and (Y/N) nodded. 
“You must understand,” (Y/N) said. “I wish to see my wife, and help her through these times but I cannot in good conscience leave Runestone when my position is not yet secure.” 
Gunthor frowned, “What will you do then?” 
(Y/N) groaned, dropping his head in his hands. “Can I not send him away and be done with it all?” 
“Sending him away will not stop him,” Gerold said. “It may just incentivise him further. It is easier to keep him close where you can watch him and those who may support him than to send him away to move in secret.” 
(Y/N) sighed, looking up at his cousin and taking in his expression. Defeated, he leaned back in his chair, “I cannot leave can I?” 
“I cannot tell you what to do, (Y/N).” 
“Just-” (Y/N) closed his eyes, frustrated with the entire situation. He longed for Rhaenyra, wishing to be there to see her through her pregnancy. “Just be honest, Gerold.” 
“No, you cannot leave.” 
(Y/N) nodded, reaching for a blank piece of parchment and his quill. “Thank you for your counsel, cousin. Tell Maester Pate I wish to send a raven to Kingslanding with my decision.” 
Rhaenyra would have to understand, securing his position was for the good of their future family. Their second child will inherit Runestone after him, and (Y/N) would stay for as long as he needed to ensure that.
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Rhaenyra’s labor had begun only hours after (Y/N) had set foot in Kingslanding. Viserys and Daemon had been thrilled at the news, but Rhaenyra’s fears of the birthing bed had not at all ebbed throughout the many moons of her pregnancy. (Y/N)’s absence from court during those moons had not helped her trepidation, but as the labors started (Y/N) assured her he would pick her over any babe. 
(Y/N) was not allowed in the birthing room despite his protests, after a particularly rough scream tore itself from Rhaenyra’s throat (Y/N) had pulled his dagger on one of the guards, which subsequently caused his father to drag him even further away from the room. 
His father and Ser Harwin were watching the young Lord of Runestone as Rhaenyra’s screams and curses echoed throughout the halls. Daemon was silent, wincing at his nieces wails every so often, while Harwin had taken to whispering words of comfort to (Y/N). 
“She is strong.” Harwin said, hand resting softly yet reassuringly on (Y/N)’s shoulder. 
“Cunt!” (Y/N) chuckled softly at Rhaenyra’s words, and Harwin smiled. 
“See.” Harwin said, “She is doing well.” 
Footsteps sounded down the hallway, (Y/N) looked over to see King Viserys and Queen Alicent approaching the group of men. Alicent was holding her own swollen stomach as she approached and (Y/N) was reminded that she too was soon headed toward the birthing bed once again. Alicent frowned at Harwin, and (Y/N) narrowed his eyes at the young queen. 
“Ser Harwin,” Alicent addressed the knight, “Does Rhaenyra need her sworn protector-” 
“I wished him to be here.” (Y/N) cut her off, and she looked at him, frowning. 
“Of course.” 
Viserys paid the three of them no mind, he looked exhausted. (Y/N) had heard from both Rhaenyra and Daemon about the king’s deteriorating health these past moons. The letter had given no justice to truly how bad Viserys looked, although he still insisted on acting as if he was alright. 
“How is she?” 
“Well,” (Y/N) replied, “I think. They would not let me in.” 
Viserys gave him a sympathetic look, as the cry of a babe captured all of their attention. (Y/N) pushed himself quickly off the wall rushing into the room, Daemon and Viserys following closely behind him. 
Rhaenyra lied in bed, face pale and covered in sweat, her normally perfectly styled hair was messy and sticking to her skin. She lifted her head at the sound of people entering the room, smiling and relaxing at the sight of her husband. The maester handed the babe, wrapped in a deep brown cloth, with a mop of dark curls peeking out, to (Y/N). 
“A boy, your grace.” 
(Y/N) stared silently at the babe, still crying although slowly but surely calming, (Y/N) looked up to Rhaenyra, who the midwife was attending to. He traced his son's features gently, fearful of hurting the precious bundle. He had not understood the fear his father spoke of until the babe had been placed into his arms, and he remembered that Daemon had been no older than he was now when (Y/N) was born. 
“He’s perfect.” 
Viserys and Daemon came up next to him, and (Y/N) remembered he was holding the future heir to the Iron Throne. He gently handed the babe to his uncle, and he smiled, allowing his brother to peer at their grandson over his shoulder. “What is his name?” 
(Y/N) looked to Rhaenyra, “Whatever you wish.” 
Viserys handed the babe off to Alicent, whose frown deepened. Daemon spoke before Rhaenyra, “He should have a name fit for a king.” 
(Y/N) shot his father a dirty look, already knowing that his father was implying his son should not have a Vale-like name. “Rhaenyra labored to bring our son into this world, she shall pick whatever name she wishes.” 
“Jacaerys.” Rhaenyra said, motioning for the babe to be brought to her. (Y/N) took the babe from Alicent, her expression making the Lord of Runestone uneasy. He handed him to Rhaenyra, pressing an affectionate kiss to the top of her head, and Rhaenyra laid down head resting on (Y/N)’s side. “His name will be Jacaerys Royce.” 
Alicent did not linger around any longer than she needed to, exiting the room as soon as attention was on Rhaenyra. Viserys gave his daughter a kiss on the forehead before following after his wife. Daemon lingered the longest, looking adoringly at his grandson. (Y/N) had feared his father’s reaction to his son’s more Vale-like features, but Daemon did not seem to mind. 
“Congratulations.” Daemon smiled, pressing a soft kiss to both of their cheeks before taking his own leave. “I will fetch someone to clean the sheets and help you dress.” 
Rhaenyra nodded her thanks before the two new parents were left on their lonesome. Rhaenyra, wincing, sat up further, handing the bundle off to (Y/N). (Y/N) smiled down at Jacaerys, tensing when the babe opened his eyes, big and brown, but instead of breaking back into sobs he just stared up at his father. (Y/N) reached down, smiling softly as the babe grabbed his finger placing it in his mouth. 
“I think he is hungry.” (Y/N) chuckled. “Shall I fetch a wet nurse?” 
Rhaenyra nodded, and (Y/N) handed the babe back to her. He opened the door, looking at Ser Harwin who was still waiting outside the door. 
“Would you like to meet him?” 
“Him?” Harwin asked, and (Y/N) nodded. 
“It is a boy.” (Y/N) smiled, “I am going to fetch a wetnurse, but I am sure Rhaenyra would be delighted to introduce him to you.” 
As Harwin gingerly stepped into the room, (Y/N) tracked down a wetnurse. As he returned to the chambers, he took a seat by Harwin and Rhaenyra’s side as Jacaerys was handed off to the nurse. As soon as the nurse was out of earshot Rhaenyra turned to her husband. 
“How long are you staying?” 
(Y/N) frowned, “Nyra-” 
“I will not beg you to stay, (Y/N). I know you will not.” Rhaenyra said. 
“That is not fair. You know-” 
“The complexities of politics are not lost on me, (Y/N).” She was obviously tired from her labors, but (Y/N) could tell he was not getting out of this conversation. “But what of our son? Will he grow up without you because you were too busy infighting with your cousin?” 
“I am doing this for our son.” 
Rhaenyra sighed, the fight going out of her at his comment. “Yes, I know- I just- I want Jace to grow up with a father.” 
“He will.” (Y/N) promised. “But not until I am sure Gunthor will not undermine me at the first opportunity. I will return to you, I promise. And Harwin will be here watching over you both to make up for what I am missing.” 
He turned to Harwin, who nodded a silent promise to the prince. (Y/N) took his hand in thanks. 
“Did you see Alicent’s face when she held him?” Rhaenyra looked across the room longingly at where their son was now asleep in a cradle, the wetnurse long gone. “I am sure she is already spreading her poison.” 
“Fuck Alicent.” (Y/N) spat, causing both Rhaenyra and Harwin to laugh. “She can spread whatever rumors she wishes, they will go nowhere. Our son is a Royce, he has Vale-blood, that fact alone will be enough to quell her whisperings.” 
Harwin squeezed his hand in reassurance, bringing it up to press a soft kiss to its back. “I have missed you, (Y/N).” 
(Y/N) smiled at the knight, before turning to his wife. “I do wish I could stay with you three.” 
Rhaenyra reached for (Y/N). “We will pray for your success, ñuha jorrāelagon, and await your triumphiant return to us."
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Translations -
Valzȳrys - Husband
Olvie jorrāelagon - Much love
Ñuha jorrāelagon - My love
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