#i swear i think about it every month
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If I die, I’ll bring you with me. Then... kill me.
Nana, Ai Yazawa.
#this panel is my undoing#i swear i think about it every month#every day#once a day#los amo#nana#ai yazawa#shoujo manga#manga#josei manga#nana manga#shoujo romance#shoujo#shoujo cap#shoujosei#ren x nana#ren nana#nana x ren#ren honjo#nana osaki#osaki nana#josei cap#josei romance#josei#manga aesthetic#manga cap#manga panel#manga art#manga caps#mangacap
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I can't imagine being anywhere near as insane as Trump supporters because my dad told me that he, earlier, drove past a guy putting a "Harris Walz 2024" sign outside his house and decided to yell out at him "TRUMP 2024 YOU COCKSUCKER" and flip him off. And he laughed when he told me because he thinks that yelling at a man (emphasized man because he thinks men should be "better" than women, and "better" would be voting for Trump in this case) who is voting for a "whore who slept her way to the top" (his exact words) is funny. And expected me to laugh with him. And got angry when I didn't and just stared at him in disbelief. Even though he already knows that I don't like Donald Trump. These people fully expect others to find their weird ass derogatory words and behavior FUNNY. Donald Trump is leading a cult of old people who he brainwashed into being delusional with him.
#vote blue#harris walz 2024#kamala harris#tim walz#i know some fucker is gonna be here saying like “it's true i was the tree”#i didn't see this with my own two eyes but i've lived 21 years with my dad and i HAVE seen him do shit like this#but it was mostly just honking at random people on the sidewalk or yelling “WHERE Y'GOING” in their direction out the window#like it's still embarrassing and weird but not derogatory#and since being retired and having nothing to do all day except watch trump and more trump and more trump he has gotten worse#not a day has gone by in the last four months where he hasn't insulted joe biden or kamala harris#and every single time he has expected my brother and i to laugh at his insult even though he knows that we don't like trump#it's so depressing watching your own parent become a worse person#he was already one of the insufferable republicans before trump and now he's a trump republican which is even worse#and yk what's even worse it's that my mom has no spine against men so if her boyfriend asks for her to vote trump she'll be like “okay”#she's not a republican she just doesn't care because she thinks voting doesn't matter#my aunt who i have always loved so much now calls up my dad to talk about trump with him and i never heard her swear until this year#my other aunt makes talking about trump her entire personality when she has a gambling addiction she should be treating instead#my dad's side is a bunch of trump supporters and my mom's side just doesn't give a fuck#and i can't vote because i'll get kicked out of here faster than the speed of light the second my dad sees#the paper in the mail saying that my voter history has been updated#even if it's not public who i voted for because he knows that whoever i vote for will never be trump#sorry#tag vent#this sucks#please vote
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Re: the latest helluva boss short, i REFUSE to believe that blitzø is bad in the sack. i just refuse that notion all together. i do believe he has zero technique whatsoever though, because he relies heavily on confidence and on his excellent capability of reading people.
See, thats all you need to be a sex god imo. If youre skilled enough at reading peoples reactions properly, you dont need technique because you dont need generalisation, you figure out what that SPECIFIC person likes. and that makes you invaluable to their eyes. i do believe two things, one is that blitzø enjoys cracking open that mistery and exploring what makes someone tick, two is that he is extremely observant and good at reading people/situations (exes and oohs is a great example of this, both in how he clocked the drugged drink right away and how he slept with chaz to get info), aside from also being quite versatile, handy and extremely adaptable.
Third thing i believe is that blitz is also DEFINITELY all over the place, so sometimes he may also be bad at sex because he can also be selfish and self centered, so he may not care enough to pay attention to the other person at times. But he has the capability to be great in bed is all im saying.
So what i believe happens in the short is, first of all as other people have said he has some complicated feelings about this crystal. Because of course. So maybe he doesnt even feel like pleasuring a stupid crystal when he should be pleasuring stolas, thank you very much!! And also the crystal is an inanimate thing, he cant really gauge a reaction from it so he would have to rely solely on technique, which he lacks 😋
#i love this clown so much i swear to god. IM A TOP MOXXIE!!!!#i refuse to believe he pulls so many people and SUCCUBI while being bad at sex. he also clocked chaz right away as horrible in bed#im team blitz might occasionally be bad at sex bc hes too self focused that evening#but normally hes a great fuck. just like everything about him its about polar opposites. like how he craves and chases intimacy but then#runs away. like how hes both sweet and open and closed off and aggressive. he is everything to me#blitzø#helluva boss#mission: antarctica#text pots#comment#*#ive started this show less than a month ago and it has occupied every last braincell i possess for the entire time ever since i caught up#blitzø is so me coded i will never shut up about him. also i simp for him because i am also stolas coded i contain moltitudes#i think about blitzs sex life WAY too much hes just a bunch of lines and shapes and colours i shouldnt be like that#some messy liveblog tag
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halloween thing i drew for an art trade with @cherry-207 ! she asked for edgar and scri dressed as angel and devil . you can see her part here !
edgar vargas belongs to jhonen vasquez
scriabin belongs to @zarla-s
#hello . uhhhhhhhhhhh#UHHH WAIT WAIT I CAN EXPLAIN I SWEAR#i know i haven't posted a thing since like A MONTH AND I'M SORRY BUT i have a really nice excuse for this . yes .#right after posting devi's drawing my mom BROKE HER FOOT ?? WOAH !#and idk maybe i was sad or . stressed because i had to do a bunch of things my mom used to take care of and it was really stressing#this + school stuff + a drawing a day + some other things pretty much started killing me#and suddenly i was getting hives every single day after 11.30pm . yeah . it was TERRIBLE#so uh . i had to stop doing some stuff for my own wellbeing . like . drawing . for example#but it worked !#now i just have a bunch of mosquito bites on my hands . they seem to like them .#OH SO well um YEAH DRAWING#an art trade with one of my friends !!!! drawing this was honestly so fun#as you can see this is from october 25th . but i wanted to wait for brusk to finish her piece before posting it#te quedó precioso emily . valió totalmente la pena la espera . tqm#edgar's costume looked so boring next to scriabin's#he looked way prettier with wings but if i wanted to add them i would have to erase 90% of scriabin and he came out so pretty to do that#so . instead of making him wear something pretty and detailed like scri's costume i had to make him wear something you could see and think#“ oh yeah that's an angel ”#i explained this to brusk after showing her the drawing and she said#“ if you think about it . him having a traditional costume fits his character "#and i was like OH#ACTUALLY YEAH THAT'S COOL#anyways i really like this one . the colors are so pretty . i finally found a way to make my colors warm and pretty .#WELL UH THAT'S TOO MANY TAGS BYE#vargas#zarla s#vargas zarla#scriabin vargas#edgar vargas#sunny's art
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Dude what the fuck is Art School?
#heyyyyyyyyyy it seems that I have left this blog for a month aha my baddddd rawr#but I swear I am actually very busy and on the verge of crying every 10 seconds#anyway did anybody missed me while I was fighting for my life at school????#if not then would you change your mind if I say I also got into an accident and fucked up my car a bit???#would you still love me if I am a worm???? would you?#but anyway how is everyone doing while I was away????#i vant promise yall I'll be active I am kinda tired with school and im just too stressed out to think about selfshipping in general zzzz#i actually havent draw selfship for like.... uh... since 2 months actually thats insane hmmm#okay anyway i hope everyone had a good day please enjoy this silly update by me#asuka speaks
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Ohhh I am trying so hard not to get mad at people online you have to believe me but that post about bloodborne liking women is driving me a little bit crazy not gonna lie. We can all so clearly see and point out misogyny in ds (um. Im hoping at least) so why can't we ever do it in bloodborne? Even though its the same people? What about bloodborne makes you think theyre feminists all of a sudden. Because it talks about women? Okay, but that's not how that works, a work that disregards women is misogynistic, that much everyone knows, but a work that does talk about women but portray them in a weird light can also very much be. Also whenever people say bloodborne is about women or femininity, a huge chunk of the time what they mean is bloodborne is about motherhood and pregnancy. Which is true, but thats... Not what womanhood is thats not what women are about you can't just reduce women as a concept to birth. And motherhood. And being caretakers. Almost every woman in bloodborne has less agency than their men counterparts, most of them are more strongly abused, shown as complacent and weak and only exist to serve. Even maria has no agency and is constantly driven back to the fact she was gman's apprentice and following he and laurence's orders. She has little identity outside of them in written down ingame lore and the one time she did something outside of them, is the one time she became a caretaker (because all women are it seems). The fact the og lady maria npc even exists is even worse on that part. I'm using her as an example because shes the one people most often take as an example of bb being good about women (look theres a strong female character!) but it's obviously much more than just her, just look at arianna and adella for more than one second. The only npcs i can think of that i would consider Actually Good And Normal About Women are eileen and fauxsefka. And i mean actual npcs im not counting bosses that we dont know much about on a personal level (like rom and amelia)
What I'm trying to say is, i think it's awesome when people have feminist interpretations of bloodborne and i think its a good thing to take those female characters for yourself and its a good thing to make the game as transgender and gay as you want it to be, and its perfect soil for that too, i do it all the time and find many many themes in it by myself, but we can't keep lying to ourselves that it was any good at it on its own. It's soulsborne for fuck's sake it has Always been Really Weird about women and minorities just look at ds look at firekeepers and gwyndolin and many other examples. Bloodborne isnt exempt from that just because men are writing about pregnancy as horror.
#i swear i say this every month but like i feel strongly about this#slsborne isnt 'inherently gay' WE made it#and thats a compliment to us and not the writers#the writers did not intend to make it as gay & trans & feminist as we interpreted it#that much is very clear to me#its completely ok and awesome to celebrate bb as like trans culture and whatnot#i do that too im always talking about how its an extremely trans game#but we have to remember its because we saw ourselves in it and made it so not because the writers made it so#miyazaki is absolutely not a feminist icon or whatever#theres always more i have to say about this but i cant ever figure out how to word it#the thing is the way women are in this game are fine if they were isolated cases#but its the fact that they almost all are Like That that makes it bad#cuz believe me i love women with issues and women that r horrible people and women that are doomed to have no agency#i think theyre always the most interesting characters. but thats in cases where its not All Of Them#when its All Of Them that r like that it says something abt the writers more than anything#my worst curse is that i badly love female characters that are forced to be serviceable#im the blood saints fan im the firekeepers fan. but i see and know how absolutely fucking shitty of a trope they are#bc they dont exist in a vaccuum
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I swear if my period doesn't start tomorrow im gonna kill myself (hyperbolic) ♡
#two days ago i was having All the symptoms and was absolutely ready for it to start#now look at me in my clown make up and clown costume still waiting for something to stop the torture#of pms#something that will be Way more painful but still be better than THIS#i swear it's weeks like this that make me think of doing chasteberry again#(yes i like to talk about it like it's a drug habit. i hate chasteberry. it sucks. it leads to other horrors#but it Does kinda alleviate the horrors of pms so i gotta pick my poison i guess. but then again. getting a period Every month seems just#way too excessive. i can't deal with that shit. BUT THEN I'LL HAVE 3 WEEKS OF PRE PERIOD HORRORS AND IDK IF THAT'S BETTER RN)#end me#void screams#tumblr. my personal period tracker app ♡
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do you think while they were at the palace for however long it was, asra would see lucio being all plague infested or whatever and get a little sick to his stomach because in the back of his mind he knows that mc went through the same thing and didnt have anyone to take care of them
#the arcana#the arcana game#the subconscious guilt mustve gone crazy huh#like. yes it's lucio so he feels next to nothing when it comes to him but also. this is exactly what mc mustve been going through#ive been thinking about this game a lot recently. idk#when you really think about the implications of certain plot points you will never stop thinking about them i swear#i have a mental breakdown over the lore every other month. fuck dorian for real
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Your essay on Joong's underrated acting skills deepened my Joong appreciation so much, that I watched Mafia the Series, I'm watching Ploy's Yearbook (even though there is a serious lack of Joong so far), and I'm planning on watching The Warp Effect too. I haven't watched het shows in over ten years, so this is a big deal! 😂 I really liked him with Dunk in their shows, but MTS gave me another facet of him, because he's so timid in it, unlike in SIMM and HA, where he's (seemingly) very cool and in control. So thank you for making me a full time Joong (and Dunk) girl 💜
i saw this message first thing in the morning when i woke up yesterday and it instantly put me in a good mood!!! <3
YESSSSSS I'M SO HAPPY TO HEAR THAT
mafia the series might actually be my absolute fave thai het-show, it's just SO funny!!!! and the entire cast is so great, like, not just joong but the entire cast plays off each other SO well. and don't even get me started on gina virahya and her portrayal of anna kondra!!!!
you know, when i went into mafia the series i saw the poster and was like "ughh i really am gonna have to sit through this standard (overly) dramatic mafia show just for joong, huh. the things i do for my boy..." and then. AND THEN. you can imagine my surprise. i was crying tears of laughter throughout the show and i was actually laughing so hard that my mom made a comment about how she could hear my laugh in my room
beam is my loser boy and joong portrays him in such an adorably awkward way, i love it <333
and yes there IS a serious lack of joong in ploy's yearbook so far :((((
it was quite funny tho bc in the one scene where joong does show up i immediately recognized him by the back of his head, like!! i saw this:
and instantly went "OH there's my boy!!!!!" 😂😂😂
and i can't wait to see him with film bc film did extremely well with gun in not me and i feel like film and joong will also work together really well
you know, i'm always happy to turn people into full time joong (and dunk) girls!!!!!!
i've adored them ever since simm which i watched live from ep2 onwards. fun fact, actually: when i started simm i actually had no idea who they were (even though technically i'd seen dunk in bad buddy already, except i wasn't paying attention to the random high school bandmates and so i didn't actually recognize dunk and only realized later on ahahah)
aaaanyway, i had no idea who they were, right? and so in 2022 my mom and i spent two nights in prague during easter and in the evening we were in our hotel room and we were kinda looking for something to watch. and i was like "hey look, gmmtv has a new bl out and it looks kinda cute and fluffy judging by the thumbnails?? and like something that doesn't require too much brain power?? plus, there's also only two eps out so far, so we'll be caught up right away" and so we watched the first two episodes and then the two of us ended up watching every new ep together every week hahaha
i actually didn't really talk about it on tumblr back then and when you go back on my blog you'll see that there are hardly any simm post. but really, with every new simm episode that aired i liked joongdunk more and more. and especially once the characters started dating i was actually so in awe about just how comfortable joong and dunk were with each other and how they absolutely weren't afraid to touch? like, their physical affection was just so casual, like it was the most natural thing in the world to them in an "i'm-not-even-thinking-about-it-bc-it's-so-normal" kind of way and that was just soooo refreshing to watch?? i was (and still am) truly amazed
and when just a couple of months later, at the end of 2022 gmmtv announced joongdunk were gonna get another show together i got SO excited!! and also when it was revealed that simm was included in our skyy 2!!!!
and then hidden agenda started airing and then i was tagged in that tag game and then i went to watch joong's entire filmography and then i ended up falling into a joongdunk rabbit hole and here we are...
anyway, i have multiple agendas and one of them is turning people into joong fans and dunk fans and joongdunk fans sllksdfd
and my other agenda is getting people to watch mafia the series, bc it's truly a gem of a show!!!!
(speaking of agendas: the only thing that's missing in your message is you telling me that you approve of my fight for a sexy joongdunk vampire bl, like... that would have made the message and the influence of my joong/dunk/joongdunk blogging complete 😂😂😂)
#you know when i saw your message first thing in the morning my immediate thought was#''ok nothing that happens today can top this like. my day is ALREADY made and i only just woke up''#your message set the bar very very high for me tbh#but then in the afternoon my crush unexpectedly called me after we barely talked the past 3 or so months and we spent 1.5h on the phone#and well i'm really sorry but THAT was the actual no.1 highlight of my day yesterday dfjkkjdfkfdg#i swear your message is a close second tho!!! ��😂#asks#anon#joong archen#adrm#no but every time someone tells me i turned them into a joong fan/dunk fan/joongdunk fan i get such a rush of satisfaction lmao#i'm desperately waiting for summer night#i might just go off about dunk's acting after that#we'll see#bc i REALLY wanna see what dunk can do without joong and if he'll be as good#my money is on ''yes'' but i also don't wanna say anything to avoid eating my own words kdfkdf#but in reality i see many qualities to him as an actor that i think he should be able to do keep even without being opposite joong#besides he's now done two series as a lead character so now he has a lot more acting experience than he did going into simm#his acting was already so much stronger in hidden agenda then it was in simm (hello?? yank-kiss-yeet?? ep9?? ep11??)#and i trust that he's not just gonna lose it all in summer night all of a sudden#god i'm immensely excited to see him act in summer night you don't even know
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i wish it was acceptable to ask to dtr friendships
like are we treating this as bfs or acquaintances or talks casually every other month or every day gm and gn or what
like please tell me what amount of energy and care you are willing to reciprocate without pingponging between loving me and not even giving a fuck if i die, just stop with all this hot and cold bs
#like okay i get going into depressive slumps or shutting off sometimes but fuckin tell me#so i dont think you are ghosting me again with no forewarning or reason#its not like it'll be the first time#it's been more than a week#and going from gn gm and every single detail about your day from straight up no reply?#is it gonna be like last time(s) again then#dropping me for months and then getting all sorry and self destructive#its already been twice (ik i am pathetic for forgiving her but ffs i thought you had changed)#argh#ARGHHHHHHH#friendships#i swear#i hope she's just busy and nothing jas happened to her#rant#but just in the tags the post i still think is fair#thoughts#desiblr#eph#</3
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i think ive mentioned this before but like i cannot stress enough how fucked up i think it is that i started dissociating at such a young age and continued that for months and never realized
#crunchyposts#me ventilating#the mental illness chronicles#not as bad as others but like i was so young. im still young and this happened years ago so#and throughout those months i was like 'maybe the situation isnt as bad as i think it was'#meanwhile every time my brain tried to remind me of the situation i immediately started to forget that the world around me was real#tw dissociation#tw derealization#i was constantly saying to myself 'maybe youre overreacting' while i wandered through life feeling weird when people said my name#because i forgot that other people were aware of my existence#this did also make me a worse person i am a lot meaner to strangers now bc i forgot that they were also real#im better now i swear i know yall are real i know that im typing this#i know my name i dont feel as weird when i see pictures of myself#but i just get really mad on behalf of younger me being put in a situation that forced their brain to dissociate#there was probably someone i couldve talked to about this but i was barely aware of anything happening aroud me let alone the concept#of dissociation so#i say im ok now bc i dont want yall to worry im really fine now i just wannt to rant#wow i found old messages saying it caused me physical pain#and the next message was 'nevermind we're back to everything feeling fake we're good now' isnt that fucked up. trauma babyyyyyy
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Wait I think I missed something in this incredible saga. Are you going on a date with the coworker??? I swear the last thing I saw was “no I would never” lmaoooo. If so, I (like the rest of snzblr) are anxious for updates about your love life. You’re one of the top snzblr couples now, enjoy 🤙
I did say I would never and I was a fucking liar apparently 😔 it's not technically a date tho bc I never told him it was bc I need to be so casual and mysterious ahdkaksk but it's a date To Me lmao. It's tomorrow tho bc we're still at work rn and it doesn't look like we're leaving anytime soon so at least I have that to look forward to I guess lmao
#not snz#we're not a couple tho nooooo 😭😭 lmaooo#it's just me being delusional#like he's literally not into me i stg i think y'all are gonna be more disappointed about the outcome than me#OH but he did hug me tho so I'm riding that high rn actually ahskamsk#lowkey have just been leaning against him half the shift but we've been watching videos and stuff together bc it's been slow so#that means nothing probably#also he looks at me like 😒 every time i ask one if my stupid little debate questions ahsakslsl#today was if ceral is a soup and if ketchup is a smoothie#please know that i ask these randomly literally out of nowhere like it's a normal thing to bring up lmaoooo#i have negative flirting skills ahdkaksk#this is the opposite of pulling a bad bitch by being autistic this is making the coworker question why he puts up with me lmaoooo#but he's the one who said yes to dinner so 😌#you know what he's never seen me in a cute little outfit before actually 👀#it's always been either the work uniform or hiking clothes#which to be fair my hiking clothes are kinda cute but they're hiking clothes nonetheless#like he saw me in normal clothes a bit ago but i was actively dying so they were just the most comfortable clothes i could find#so like maybe i can wear a skirt i have cute skirts i like wearing out with my bestie#and they're like. very specific kinds of skirts so maybe that'll tell him something ahskasmks#help why am i thinking so hard about this ahdkalslal#like it's literally actually not even a date it's just me flipping out for no reason while this guy is clueless 😭#like I'm telling y'all he's not into me and i don't understand why I'm being like this about it lmaoo#I'm always like 'fuck i wish my coworkers wouldn't crush on me to the point of asking me out that's awkward i don't date coworkers'#AND THEN I TURNED AROUND AND DID IT MYSELF#why am i like this#why am i so 👀 when he's one of the few people i shouldn't be 👀 at#i swear i should give it a couple months bc maybe I'm just feeling some type of way about him bc i was sick#but noooo i just HAVE to be insane about it now 😭#i should really have a tag for me being a pathetic wreck but idk what it would even be lmao#no matter he'll probably figure out that I'm being a freak sooner or later and shut that shit down so it won't matter 😔
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anyway as soon as i pry myself off this couch im gonna share some screenshots of bg3 protags on my sideblog. just gotta like. reach the desk first.
#all i can think about is the shelves im gonna get installed here over the next little bit fdghj#yall dont understand its so hard to keep things clean and brain friendly when you just dont have anywhere to put stuff.#hellish#& then i get overwhelmed and turn into a massive bitch when i try to get it under control fdgh#instead its been like. 2 straight days of dopamine i fucking swear?? my body probably definitely wouldnt let me do this for a living#(my hip is screamingggg dfghgjj) but actually if i could & if i could work in a team then yeah. ykw i enjoy it.#organization go brrrrrrr#i dont think she was expecting me to work that fast either but ive been like a feral animal. skittering over clutter.#finding Spots for Things#okay i lied the flood was actually beneficial in one way to me specifically.#estranged father just forgot a Bunch of tool sets here & ive claimed them now fdghjk#that nail gun is MINE#she suggested i look out for an actual tool chest/bench thing (ykw the ones with wheels and stuff) for everything and i havent been that#excited for anything in months fdgh tools are expensive alright. too bad he took the table saw.#i dont talk much abt my Masc Hobbies as i call them lmao no real reason to but hoooboy i love to Build Things#give me that ikea desk ill have it done in an hour or less every time#maybe trade school is still on the horizon for me gfhj always wanted to Weld Stuff i think id be good at it#as much as i fuckin loathe yard maintenance i was a real garage sooooo bad its not even funny#shame i wasnt just inherently expected to know car stuff tm i feel like i would have loved it too#scarrier to learn on your own later in life especially with a lease vehicle but ill get there eventually#anyway yeah bg3! new mods. new ocs#have not done much with them yet but they Exist and theyre pretty
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wot r some of ur favorite habits that lin has?
the tongue thing - probably my favourite but also the worst (you know what i mean... jail for this man)
whatever the hell he is doing with his hands every time he speaks or when he raps like... damn, his hands are everywhere & i love it, the chaos of it all
back in his long hair days he used to randomly tuck his hair behind his ear & i find it very cute & kinda awkward at the same time (i may have a few gifs)
i don't know if you can call it a habit but every time he speaks english & just randomly throws in spanish words i swear to god my brain stops working
#i could probably think of more#but those are my favourite things#i swear to god i feel like i've been studying him for months#i need help#what about you anon?#lin manuel miranda#anon#i saved every letter you wrote me*
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Been thinking about the several Zombie AUs I've had over time and listen. Roxy and Cassie both being canines and Chica having to deal with them both giving her puppy dog eyes for food. Both of them looking up at her from the couch with just the biggest, saddest eyes you've ever seen while she eats something she made before they got there.
Chica's wife came back from the zombie war with a little sister and now there's two soppy idiots begging her for food all the time.
#lmao I love them I think they'd have fun doing this shit#roxy has had cassie for three months and they're already taking after each other like they've been sisters their whole lives#it's weird cause I feel like Chica would take a parental role pretty easily but I feel like while Roxy COULD she just sorta wouldn't#one of those family dynamics that makes sense to them and no one else. as it should be really#the other zombie au with the train has them doing this too but it's monty instead of chica#and sometimes monty does the big eyes with cassie to convince roxy to share her copious amounts of sugary food#honestly those two found sugar ONCE and now if they ever run out of it monty SWEARS roxy's never gonna stop crying about it lmao#should be the same for peanut butter honestly cause she's a canine#LISTEN IF THE COOKBOOK IS SO GOOD WHY DOESN'T THE DOG HAVE PEANUT BUTTER HUH???? WHY NOT????#<- tortured by every single fucking book in this fucking series#fnaf security breach#roxanne wolf#fnaf cassie#because this works for every anthro au really lmao#fnaf zombie au#don't remember my tags for this at all my bad
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I'm going to say again like I know it is really dumb to feel this way, but I finally put into words why I get so annoyed when people ask me for a part 2 to one of my works. Like I explained once to people that writing is a very slow and arduous task for me, but it's more than that?
Picture you are an artist working on a painting. You spend months on it to get everything just right. You pour time and energy into getting the perfect composition, the perfect lighting, the perfect shades etc. And then finally, you finish it. After a year, you finally finished your masterpiece. And your work is a hit. People really like it. But then.... Someone comes up to you and says, "Gosh, I really love this painting! But you know what? I love it so much that I think the painting is much too small. You know what? You should add on two extra feet of canvas onto the right side of your painting. That way, you can add on more to your painting and it'll be even bigger and more enjoyable!"
To me, that's what it feels like when someone asks for a part two. Like this last fic honest to God I started on more than a year ago. Granted, I'd pick it up and put it back down, but I put a lot of work into making sure everything was as perfect as possible. It's not an amazing fic, mind you, but it still gave me a lot of trouble. But eventually I finished it into a COMPLETE work. It's a finished painting. That's the story I wanted to tell in its entirety.
I get why people want a part two. I get that the story ends to leave you wanting to know what happens next. But that's the point. That's the story I wanted to tell. It's complete. This isn't supposed to be pure romance. It's supposed to be more on the comedic side. But when people ask for a part two, it's like they're telling me that they're not satisfied with my artwork, that it's not perfect and needs more work for it to become perfect. It's like they're ignoring all the year's worth of effort I put into making sure the composition, wording, humor, etc was just right. Not only that. I should put another year's worth of work into making it truly perfect. It's insulting and exhausting.
Granted, like I said, I do understand people completely do not intend to make me feel this way. I'm not irritated with these people directly. I know it's supposed to be a compliment. But like.... Maybe it's because I'm prideful but I really can't help but be insulted. It's telling me that I didn't do a good job as a writer.
#rambles#'but a good writer makes people want to read more!!'#that's true but i still dont like it#i have a feeling if i explained this to my grandpa he'd understand what i mean#i think another reason why it rubs me the wrong way is... the attitude people have to fanmade content in general#people on this site have no appreciation for hard work#this site is mainly greasy fast food when it comes to reader-insert fics#when they ask for a part two it feels like they're putting in an order at mcdonalds#they're only doing it to reap the rewards of my hard work#i can't spit these things out in one sitting#i swear to god i take an average of eight months or more to release any long work#asking for a part 2 really isnt a compliment at all#you're just giving me an order#you didn't tell me a single thing about why you liked my work. just that you want more#like does this make sense?#istg writing this is like.... i am so my grandfather's granddaughter#both prideful obsessed loners that cant take a compliment#also if its not clear if you added two extra feet of canvas to the right of a painting like....#you essentially have to rework the whole thing#might as well start from the very beginning#every intentional choice you made in your painting is ruined#i know it sounds like i'm exaggerating but that's what it feels like being told to add a part two#i cant just simply add on a chapter#i have to reframe everything from the ground up#do you realize how daunting that is?
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