#i struggled with this one for some reason
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3liza · 13 hours ago
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surprisingly mortalityplays is not my blood sibling but rather a precious mutual i have never met, because my childhood was nearly identical. I wanted to reblog this with an actual post because I want people to know that parents like this exist in more than one place and it is not just one mythological occurrence. anyone can raise children like this and many people choose to do so! if your parents mistreated you in the name of "discipline" that was fucked up and you didn't deserve that, but you do deserve to know about it. also I was extremely well behaved as a result of all this. other adults would routinely compliment my behavior to my parents, I was not a spoiled hellion as a result of this star trek style parenting. it does work and it makes polite, reasonable, cooperative children who are easy to raise.
I am exceptionally lucky in that my parents never hit me, grounded me, confiscated my things, banned me from my hobbies or threatened any of these actions to make me behave as a kid. as an adult it has made me realise how very very long a road most people have to traverse before they can take a statement like 'no rule that must be enforced by threat is legitimate' seriously.
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bunnieswithknives · 2 days ago
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I did not mean to cook this hard but I am genuinely astonished with how this turned out. Like oh my god??
Anywayyyy inspired by this fic
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salemlunaa · 1 day ago
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𓆉 ˚∘YOU ARE NOT BOUND TO THIS REALITY࿐
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stop acting like this place is your home, it’s not. Same thing with those trying to manifest things. You’re manifesting a new body but You believe that your home is the reality where you hate your body and that you’re doing something grand and groundbreaking by trying shift from that. You want your dream life through the void state. But you believe this reality you’re experiencing right now is your home. Your base point. Your starting ground. And you think that because you are so tied to this reality by scripting and shifting to a new life you’re doing something crazy and out-of-body like.
Let me tell you something. You aren’t. This is going to sound insane but you are as close to this reality as you are to your dream life. You are as bound to the reality where you have your dream green eyes than you are to the “current” where you have blue eyes that you don’t want.
The only reason that us bloggers use the term “current reality” is because this is the reality where your consciousness lies. I will say this again: there are multiple different versions of you reading this that you aren’t aware of and they’re probably not aware of you. Think of the country you live in right now. There’s a version of you that is from somewhere else and may know nothing about the place you call home and haven’t even stepped foot there. It’s so trippy to think about but what i’m trying to get at is that this isn’t your home. It’s nothing to be scared of, shouldn’t it be empowering and comforting to know you could be anyone you want to be?
like this is literally you:
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(found this from @shiftinglea)
It’s so easy to shift your consciousness it’s not something you need to mentally prep for, there’s nothing to do. As soon as you want and intend the shift, it happens, regardless of what you’re seeing. You aren’t stuck here, and it pains me when you guys speak about circumstances as if they’re permanent. They don’t have to exist at all. There is no journey, it’s just immediate teleportation. Think as if. Think of your “desired reality” and your current. Place your awareness there.
The reason you have so much resistance is because you believe you have to. Deep down, you believe effort is needed to leave, you believe you need some extravagant journey as you’re leaving the place you felt bound to all this time. You don’t, you’ve left. you’ve shifted. You can’t grasp that nothing, absolutely nothing needs to be done to enter the state of pure consciousness, your literal naked self.
You believe it needs to be hard because it’s too good to be true.
Leave that belief behind. You aren’t far from your life. The life you intend to have. In fact, you’re right there. Think of all these realities like your children. All of them are related to you in the same way. You don’t have one child that you’re absolutely bound to, assuming you’re a good parent with no favourites. They’re ALL close to you in the SAME PROXIMITY. They ALL have the same relation to you. It’s YOUR BLOOD aka YOU running through their veins, all of them, the veins of all these realities, even the ones you aren’t conscious of yet. You aren’t just bound to one.
So you don’t need to work super hard for that body, that shift, that face. When we say it’s yours we aren’t just trying to be encouraging it’s just facts. I’m not the most well versed marvel fan, but does Dr. Strange have a hard time shifting or does he just know where he wants to go and opens those portal thingys? Be like him. Know where you want to go and leave.
Wash your hands of what you don’t want and think as if. Thinking as if = placing your consciousness in desired state = you are in desired state = 3d will follow.
This isn’t home base. There isn’t a home base. Take that into consideration when you’re struggling to truly “just be” while trying to induce the void.
THESE REALITIES ARE ALL THE SAME. ALL YOU HAVE TO DO IS DECIDE WHERE YOU WANT TO BE ࿐
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lazysoulwriter · 3 days ago
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In the Quiet Moments - Drew Starkey.
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She hadn’t realized how long it had been until she saw the calendar on the wall. Almost a month. A whole month since she’d felt Drew’s touch, heard his laughter echoing in her apartment, or seen the warmth in his eyes when he looked at her. The constant whirlwind of interviews, photo shoots, and events had swept him away, and she tried to convince herself she understood. His career was booming, and the attention he was getting was deserved—he worked so hard for it. But that didn’t make it any easier.
She sat on the couch, scrolling through her phone, but the truth weighed heavily on her heart. She was fine on the surface, managing work and life just as she always had, but underneath it all, there was this ache. A quiet loneliness that had crept in, something she hadn’t felt before when he was around. Drew had always been a constant—his presence, his voice, his smile. Now, it felt like he was slipping through her fingers, no matter how hard she tried to hold on.
She knew the game. She knew how it worked. Drew wasn’t the first person in her life to put their career first. But with him, it felt different. There was something unspoken between them, a bond that had never been just casual, even though they weren’t officially anything. Yet.
The pain of the distance between them didn’t come from lack of affection; it came from the lack of him. She missed the way he’d brush her hair from her face as they laughed about some silly thing, or how he’d reach for her hand during those quiet moments when they didn’t need to say anything at all.
Her phone buzzed with another notification, but she ignored it. The screen blurred as her thoughts wandered to him again. To Drew. She hadn’t heard from him in a few days—no surprise, given the hectic schedule he’d been navigating. But as much as she tried to bury the feeling, a part of her longed to hear his voice. To be in his arms. Just to know he was still there.
She took a deep breath, convincing herself she was being ridiculous. He had his reasons. She would wait. She could be patient.
But then, the sound of the doorbell rang out, sharp and unexpected.
Her heart skipped a beat.
She wasn’t expecting anyone, not at this hour. Hesitantly, she stood up, her feet carrying her to the door. She opened it without thinking twice, and there he was—Drew. Standing on her doorstep, his face softer than usual, eyes slightly downcast. He wore that familiar pouty face, the one he always did when he knew he’d messed up or let something slide. But now, it felt different. It was almost as if he was apologizing without saying a word.
She didn’t speak. She didn’t need to. She just moved aside, silently inviting him in. Drew stepped over the threshold, but neither of them said anything at first.
The silence in the room felt heavy, thick with all the things they hadn’t said, all the emotions they’d kept buried. Drew shifted, running a hand through his hair, his gaze lingering on the floor, not sure how to begin.
“I know I’ve been… distant,” Drew said, his voice low, but clear. He didn’t need to say more. She already knew. “I just… I got caught up in everything. And I know that’s not fair to you.”
She stayed quiet, watching him with a mix of sadness and understanding. She could see the way he was struggling with his words. He had never been good at expressing his feelings, but this time, it was different. She could tell.
He stepped closer, closing the gap between them, and when he reached for her hands, it felt like an unspoken plea. His fingers brushed against hers, his touch tentative at first, almost as if asking for permission.
“I love you,” he said, his voice stronger now, more certain. “I know I haven’t shown it the way I should have. And I’m sorry for that. But I love you. And I want to do better. I want to be better… for you. For us.”
His words hit her harder than she expected. Her throat tightened, and her heart swelled. She could feel the sincerity in his voice, but there was also the sting of the last month—the distance, the silence. She tried to swallow the lump in her throat, but it was hard.
“I love you too,” she whispered, barely audible. Her voice cracked, betraying the hurt she’d been trying to hide. “But I’m hurt, Drew. I needed you here. I needed us.”
Drew’s expression softened, and he took a step closer, his hand gently cupping her cheek. “I know. And I’m sorry,” he said again, his voice filled with regret. “Please… let me make it right. Let me take care of the hurt I’ve caused. I’ll do whatever it takes.”
Her breath hitched, and she closed her eyes for a moment, trying to steady herself. He was here. He was here, and that meant something. It meant he hadn’t given up on them, even if he’d been lost in his world for a while.
Without another word, she let herself be pulled into his arms. Drew wrapped his arms around her, holding her close, his warmth flooding through her. She could feel his heart beating against hers, the steady rhythm grounding her. They stood there in silence for a moment, just holding each other, as if they could undo all the hurt by being together again.
And then, Drew leaned in, his lips brushing gently against hers, soft at first, as if testing the waters. But she responded immediately, her arms winding around his neck, pulling him closer. The kiss deepened, becoming more urgent, more desperate, as if they were both trying to make up for the time lost.
It wasn’t just a kiss. It was a promise. A promise to love, to be there, to make things right. It was a kiss that spoke of longing, of everything they hadn’t been able to say until now.
When they finally pulled away, their foreheads resting together, Drew’s voice was low and full of emotion. “I’m not going anywhere,” he murmured. “I promise. We’ll figure this out. Together.”
And for the first time in what felt like forever, she believed him.
・῾ ᵎ⌇ ⁺◦ 💘 ✧.
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blenderbender1811 · 2 days ago
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Depends what the book is about and who you are. Sometimes we DO need a book to reflect our own experiences back at us. I'm not even talking about 'relatable = good'. I mean sometimes we need something similar to our experiences to remind us we're not alone and others have dealt with similar struggles. It's why some of us cope by reading books about what we're dealing with, whether it's new parenthood, a mental health diagnosis or a struggle like homelessness. It's one of the reasons people have pushed for more diverse books. That's a mirror.
We also need books to show us different worldviews. Hell, even in a book with an experience we've had, we need to see different ways that issue can manifest or be experienced. And sometimes we feel better by looking at something completely different - maybe you have a crappy family and you like to look at close families in fiction. Maybe you had a bad break up and so you want a really good romance. That's a window.
Ideally, a good media diet should be full of mirrors and windows. And, I get it, there's been so much focus on mirrors lately that people have been neglecting windows or acting like windows are bad, but that doesn't make a mirror useless.
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so i started watching the fran lebowitz show and .. yeah. everyone say thank u fran <3
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peachesofteal · 2 days ago
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Tip of my Tongue - Azriel/single mom reader
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He puts you out of his mind. 
Or tries to, at least. His thoughts stray, at night, in quiet moments, and he catches himself thinking about you, wondering if he should have done more, pushed harder, tried to get you to talk to him even though he understands your reluctance. It didn’t surprise him how you avoided his eyes, turned away. 
Illyrians both hate and fear him, and Azriel despises them in return.
Cauldron only knows how you may have suffered in their hands. 
It’s not his business. 
Illyrians are not unwelcome in Velaris, it is your right to live in the city if you so choose. 
Let it go.  
His effort is in vain, crumbling only two days later when he comes across you on the street, half open bag spilled out across the sidewalk. 
Leave her be, it’s not your business, not your-
You’re crouched, baby in one arm while trying to gather up your things with another, and without thinking, he swoops down at your side, picking them up quicker than you can protest. “Are you alright?” 
This time, there’s no opportunity for you to cut him off, or run. He’s holding a stuffed rabbit in his hand. 
“Yes, I’m…” you reach for the toy, rising to stand at the same time, and blood rushes in his ears. “We’re okay, thank you.” You watch him carefully, but for some reason, less guarded than that day in the market, a little more brave, open. 
“I’m Azriel.” You probably already know that, he’s sure. 
You bite your bottom lip and practically whisper your own in return before bouncing the baby on your hip. “This is Luna. Or Lulu.” You cup her cheek, and her head tips back, wonder in her eyes as she stares at you. 
It does something to him, breaks a dam of emotion inside his heart, warmth flooding through his body from fingers to toes, and his voice is rough when he speaks.
“She’s beautiful.”
“Thanks, she’s a handful.” You hoist her higher, wincing. “And heavy. Aren’t you, Lu?” You smile, but it barely touches your eyes, their corners tight with stress. 
He wants to know why, wants to know you- 
wants to fix it. 
“Thanks for,” you gesture to the bag with your free hand, “helping. And for yesterday, too. You didn’t have to.”
“He was ripping you off.” He’s stern, almost reproachful, and you avert your eyes, guilt pinging through his bones as a result. He shouldn’t expect you to be able to hold your own in a city who undoubtedly turns their nose up at you. You’re vulnerable here, to no fault of your own. He shouldn’t chastise you for it, so he switches tactics. “Do you live in the city?” You nod. 
“We’ve been here for a few weeks.” You shift uneasily. There’s so much left unsaid, and he wants to peel away the layers hiding it all, dig to the bottom and learn every bit of it. 
Of you. 
“Which village?” Your gaze turns bleak and then clears, clouds revealing the sun. 
“Stoneguard.” His control is the only thing that smothers his surprise. Stoneguard. 
No wonder you were so tense in the Palace. No wonder you practically ran away. 
It’s an insular northern village with its own camp, positioned deep in the mountains, sheltered by rock and forest. One of the most brutal, and backwards, one of few still left unchanged. The miniscule progress happening in Windhaven and Ironcrest is still progress, but it doesn’t reach the more isolated villages or their camps. Rhys’ and their efforts to corral them, change them, have been in vain for centuries. They subscribe to the traditional practices, brutality and clipping, abuse running rampant without care. 
You grimace, like you can read his mind, and another thought occurs, striking his soul with dread. 
How did you get here? You have no wings. Did you walk, all this way, with Luna? Alone? 
“I have to get going,” you break through his spiral with an apologetic glance, “she’ll need to go down for a nap here soon.” As if she insists on making your point, Luna’s lashes flutter, eyes struggling to stay open. 
“Right, of course.” He should let you go, should be satisfied by your answers, but the brief interaction only leaves him wanting more. Leave her be, leave her be, leave her- “Have you seen much of Velaris?” You blink, and shake your head. “I could… show you around, if you’d like.” Luna hiccups, a high pitch frequency akin to a squeak, and a smile tugs at his mouth, trying to pull it upward into something genuine. It’s a hard fought battle for a male who rarely does such a thing. You stare at him, considering, examining, like you’re trying to peer inside his soul and determine if he’s to be trusted, and then you sigh. 
“Okay.”
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justmeinadaze · 3 days ago
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Curiosity (Eddie X Plus Size Y/N)
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A/N: When I tell you that this did things to me...omg.
I was going to do a one shot but there's a few stories to tell with this two (and I love them already so bleh!)
There is a small glimpse into future steddie activity ;)
I dedicate this to the older girlies looking for their own Eddie Munson <3
Warnings: Younger (Early 20s) Daddy (kinda camboy) Eddie & Older (early 30s) Plus Size Sub Fem Y/N, SMUT, SO MUCH dirty talk <3, daddy kink (cause I'm me), praise, semi-public (back of his van), big dick Eddie Munson, squirting, etc. FLUFF, these two work together and talk about being each others "work spouses".
ANGST, Y/N stumbles upon Eddie's "second job" on OnlyFans, struggles with the notion of telling him, reader (like myself) makes jokes about being older, weight doesn't play a factor in here and its barely mentioned. Eddie does say how beautiful and sexy he thinks her body is. I think that's it.
The main angst here is her stumbling onto his account and not telling him.
Word Count: 7874
Donate to Me <3
"Yeah, she's got those pretty eyes
But behind them lies
Thoughts of him at night she can't seem to fight
Feelings that she knows she's gonna have to feed"
You hated call center work but it paid alright and it was something you could do while you worked towards your goals of becoming something more. While the work and customers were tedious, the environment wasn’t too bad. Your manager was a sweet girl a little younger than you and the company did a bit more for its employees than the typical “You did well this quarter. Here’s a pizza party.”
Your head falls on to your desk as you hang up the phone after one of the rudest customer experiences in your life. 
A slight draw back was, like your manager, a lot of the coworkers around you were younger, ranging from just graduating high school to their mid-twenties. Listening to most of these kids talk made you feel old as hell which is part of the reason you connected to the boy on the opposite side of your cubicle. 
While Eddie Munson was in his early twenties, he had a slightly older soul. When he wasn’t talking to you or anyone else, he had hair metal playing in his headphones and even had that long, wild hair to match. He talked about things you remembered growing up with fondly as if he was born around the same time and when you questioned him about it, he just said he was “raised right.”
“Fun chat?”, he teased as he leaned back in his seat.
“Exciting!”, you mumbled into your arm that your head was resting on. 
Eddie’s warm laugh filled your ears as his palm extended out to rub your back. 
“I know, sweetheart. These fucking people can be real pricks sometimes.”
“Edward Munson.”
“Mrs. Angela.”
“Language. Just because you aren’t on the phone doesn’t mean people can’t hear you on the other end.”
You laughed as you sat up, meeting his radiate grin as he chuckles. 
“Yes ma’am, Mrs. Angela. I apologize for the foul mouth I was born with.”
Your manager mumbles a soft mhmm and he continues to smile as he leans in closer to speak at a much softer volume. 
“Don’t let these people walk all over you. Remember, they need your help.”, he winks before lightly poking your nose. 
As the day came to a close and you both walked out together, you asked him what his plans were for the evening and he responded the same way he always did. 
“Um, probably going to put in some hours at my second job. I want to put in more recording time this weekend and the fucking manager at the studio is demanding we put down payments before we can use the equipment. It’s fucking stupid. I mean it’s not like we’re taking the stuff home.”
“One day, you’ll have to let me hear you play.”, you smile his way as you throw your things into your car. 
“And one day you’ll finally accept my invitation to come see us play on stage.”, he grins as he opens your car door and rests his chin on the top while he watches you put your things away. 
“I think I’m too old to be hanging out in a bar.”, you giggle. 
“Says who? Definitely not me because if I met a pretty lady like you at The Hideout she’d never go home alone again.”
Eddie’s smile widens and he sticks out his tongue through his teeth as you roll your eyes. 
“I’ll see you tomorrow, weirdo.”
“Bye, babe.”
After he closed your door, your eyes followed him as he pulled his cigarettes out of his pocket and lit the end on his way to his van. 
He really was a good man and utterly adorable. People in the office called him your work husband which gave you secondhand embarrassment till he himself began playing into the role. 
“Hey now Mrs. Angela, don’t talk to my work wife that way. Don’t worry, baby girl, I got your back.”, he joked with the manager as he slid his arm around your shoulders. 
Eddie made you laugh constantly and when you had a hard day, he was your sound board allowing you to vent. A part of you felt guilty because he seemed to know more about you than you did about him besides the fact that he wanted to be a rockstar. 
You genuinely did want to hang out with him outside of work but the insecure part of you couldn’t help but always wonder why he’d even want to spend his free time with someone your age when he could be giving his attention to any of the slimmer, more attractive women his own age. 
The sound of him slamming his car door brought you back into the moment as you pushed your gear into reverse and sped to your home. 
***
“Hey, can I use your laptop to watch a movie in bed?”, you ask your roommate as her heels click along the floor behind where you were sitting on the sofa. 
“Seriously? That’s what you’re doing with your Thursday night?”
“Relaxing after a long day at the office? Yes, Kelsey.”
“Why don’t you go out on a date or something?”
“So is that a yes or…?”
Your roommate sighs as she scurries somewhere before she wiggles the device in your peripherals and you thank her. 
“Don’t judge me when you open it. I was watching this sexy guy on Only Fans. Hot damn.”, she swooned making you laugh as she quickly hugged you and hurried towards the door. “I love you! Don’t wait up for me!”
Shaking your head, you take her laptop and throw yourself on your mattress as you flip it open. 
Images of cute people caught your attention and you couldn’t stop yourself as you nonchalantly began to browse. You had never signed up for one of these let alone really knew anything about the platform besides the obvious. You weren’t a prude by any means, you had just never gone down avenues like this.
There were probably millions of people on this site… so the chances of your eyes landing on a face you knew had to be astronomical.
Yet as you clicked a “featured” link, a face you very much recognized appeared front and center. 
Eddie or as the name read, EddietheBanished, was smirking up at the camera with his upper torso bare showing off all the muscle you were completely unaware he had.
You should have let it go; respected his boundaries and closed the browser but it was like autopilot moved you as you clicked his link.
There he was.
The metalhead was sitting at a desk in what you assumed was his bedroom with his head hanging and hair in front of his face as he strummed his guitar. Shaking his mane, his gorgeous eyes met the camera before that sexy smile painted his lips. 
“I see a lot of new ‘faces.’ Welcome. I’m a nice guy I swear. I’ll be getting started here in a minute so take your time, relax, get comfy.”
You immediately backed out and slammed the computer shut, powerwalking into your kitchen to get a glass of wine. 
“No, no Y/N. He’s your friend and your coworker. Don’t invade that boundary. Don’t…”
As you took a sip of your beverage, you glared at the device that felt like it was taunting you from your bed. 
“Maybe…I can make my own account and just…see what he does. Maybe he just plays guitar without his shirt on. People do that right?”
Sitting back down, you reopened the laptop and logged out of your roommates account, selecting to create your own. 
“Name…name…I need a name…”
Um CurvyCorporateMillennial.
“God that’s dumb.”, you sigh at your internal thought as you upload a picture of a random flower as your profile pic and search for his name after you set everything set up. 
“Alright, friends, you know the drill. You get an hour to ask me questions and tip if you wish. The private group session will begin after.”
Over the course of the hour, you listened to him talk about music and his instrument, strumming along to random songs you definitely recognized, making you smile as you watched his fingers moved. Eddie was incredibly charming, replying off every innuendo with something cute or sassy in return. You enjoyed the regular answers more than anything as he came out of his shell a bit differently than he did at work. 
“Yeah, a lot of these tattoos I got because I had the money and I wanted it.”, he chuckled. “But this one here… I got for Master of Puppets and that album. Do you guys know who sings that?”
“Metallica.”
“Damn…CurvyCorporateMillennial answered that quick. Good girl.”, he chuckles making you smirk before you internally panic. 
“Shit. How am I the only one who answered that, that fast?”
“My mom and my uncle really loved all kinds of music. Inspired me to learn to play…”, he sighed as his eyes went a bit glassy. 
Your heart broke for him as you listened to the sad tone in his voice, wondering if something happened there. He never talked about his parents but to be fair you also never asked. 
“You play very well.”
A soft smile spread across his lips as he winked at the camera causing you to bite your own lip at how fucking sexy the action genuinely was. 
“Alright, we’re nearing the end of this hour. It was nice talkin’ to you guys. To my special group, I will see you in about five minutes. I hope to see you there to, Millennial.”
With that he turned off his stream, leaving you dumbfounded as you stared at your screen. 
“No…there’s no way he was talking to me. There have to other people with Millennial in their name… Y/N, you’ve been here long enough and you even engaged. You need to back away now.”
The entire time you went on the hunt for your credit card, you had that debate with yourself, down to the last minute and point you hit enter. 
When the new room opened, he was smiling at the camera as if he had been waiting just for you before they flicked down to the monitor in front of him. Instead of having a guitar in his lap, the metalhead displayed his palm absently rubbing his crotch through his sweats.
“Hey, guys. Thank you for your time and money. This is where the conversation gets fun.”, Eddie chuckles. “Ask away.”
“I shouldn’t be here.”
You can’t see anything displayed on the screen but you can see the reflection of words glisten within his chocolate eyes. 
“Aha, no. No, Steve tonight. I did ask but he said he’s incredibly busy this week…Ok, JulieGirl, I’ll let him know you miss him. Shit, I miss him to. Man definitely knows how to leave me a mumbling mess… Yeah? You’d sit on Daddy’s cock?”
“F-Fuck me.”, you panted, completely frozen as you watched him reach into his pants and take out his dick to spit over his tip, stroking it along his shaft. 
You had never thought about Eddie intimately like that but seeing him wrap his large palm around his girth had your pussy clenching around nothing. 
“Fuck, no, wrong!”, you shout as you close the browser and slam the laptop closed. 
##################
“Hey, sweetheart.”, Eddie murmured while his hand rubbed along your back as he flopped down in his seat beside you. This was an action he did everyday which is why he was startled when you gasped and jumped in your chair. “Whoa! You alright, honey? Too much coffee?”, he joked, nervous when you didn’t laugh.
“I’m fine.”, you replied curtly, choosing to focus on your computer in front of you. 
For the rest of the day, you avoided his gaze and kept your head down to work. During your lunch you two would usually sit together but today when he asked if you wanted to go anywhere, you declined and gestured towards your monitor.  
As soon as he clocked out, you waited for him to exit the floor, clocking out as well before following. You hid when you noticed him waiting for the elevator, counting to 30 after he got on and the door closed before pressing the button to ride your own. 
You breathed a sigh of relief as you prayed you’d miss him coming back in, your eyes widening in surprise when the elevator door opened and Eddie was leaning against the opposite wall. 
“Hey, um, oh fuck. I forgot something—”
As the doors began to close again, the metalhead took long strides forward and his palm loudly smacked against the bumpers causing them to slowly open once more. 
“Did I do something to make you mad?”
“What?”
“You heard me. Did I say something or do something to offend you?”
“Pfft, Eddie, what are talking about?”, you reply as nonchalantly as possible while stepping around his broad frame and heading for the parking lot. 
“Oh, come off it, Y/N. You’ve barely said two words to me and now you’re avoiding me.”
“I’m not avoiding you—”
“Just tell me what I did wrong—!”, he shouts as he reaches for your bicep to get you to slow down but pauses when you abruptly turn and glare his way. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to…grab you… I just…I don’t like this…you treating me like most of the people in this fucking town.”
“Huh?”, you inquire, genuinely confused. 
“Shit. I forget you’re not from here sometimes. Um, let’s just say I don’t have many friends. I know we don’t really hang out outside of the building but I like talking to you. It would seriously break my heart if you never spoke to me again.”
Your own heart cracked hearing the sincerity in his voice as his gaze shifted to his feet like a nervous kid. 
“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to make you feel bad or anything. I’m just…I have a lot on my mind.”
“Do you want to talk about it?”, he asks. “As your work husband it’s my duty to hear about my work wife’s woos.” As you laugh at his joke, a sigh of relief leaves his chest. 
“No, I’ll be alright.”
“Ok…may I buy you lunch, my lady?”
***
You exhaled as you got home and threw yourself flat on your bed, exhausted from the day and your constant thoughts about what you had seen the night before. 
You considered just telling him what you saw but you didn’t want to embarrass him nor did you want to come off like some kind of pervert. You knew he had a “second job” but you never asked what it was mostly because you didn’t want to pry. 
He seemed so hurt today when you ignored him and it didn’t help that you were now pent up, needing a release after hearing him talk the way he had. 
Your phone dinged and originally you ignored it, thinking it was most likely your roommate who was letting you know that she got to work safely like she always did being that she worked a late-night shift at one of the restaurants nearby. 
When you finally looked at the screen, you were surprised to see a notification from the OnlyFans account. 
Your private session with EddietheBanished starts in five minutes.
“Huh? I didn’t…”
Once again you debated with you internal self as you got to your feet and headed to grab your roommate’s device. 
“I can log in and just tell him ‘Hey it’s Y/N. I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have clicked on your thing…’ Yeah…Ok, Y/N.”
As soon as you opened the browser and signed in, you made sure the camera was off as you entered the session link sent to you. 
“Hey, Millennial.”, Eddie’s sultry voice cooed as he smiled at the screen. “I hope it’s alright. I scheduled this session here. I noticed you left the group thing before it really started and since you paid for it, I thought it only fair to do this so you don’t feel like you wasted your money.”
Your face softened at his kind confession as you sighed and began to type. 
“You didn’t have to do that. You seem very sweet. I wouldn’t have felt like I wasted my money at all.”
“Aw, thank you, sweetheart. I appreciate that. May I ask why you left so abruptly?”
“I…”
“It felt wrong.”
The metalhead blinked as he nodded and leaned back in his chair as his palm absently rubbed his tummy, the action in itself filling your own stomach with little butterflies. 
“You’re not an OnlyFans normal, are you, honey?”
“Not really no. I was borrowing my roommate’s laptop and when I opened it I saw your face. I got curious.”
“It’s alright to be curious. I’m sorry if I made you uncomfortable. I seem to be unintentionally doing that.”, he chuckles causing your head to tilt. 
“What makes you say that?”
“Oh, you don’t want to hear about my problems.”
“No, please. Is everything alright?”
“Yeah, I just… I work at this boring ass job during the day but the only person that keeps me sane seemed upset at me today…kinda scared me. My coworkers call her my work wife.” 
“I’m sure she just had a lot on her mind.”
“Hm, that’s what she said but…she doesn’t really talk to me about her personal life. I hope everything is ok. I invite her out sometimes but she always declines…says she’s ‘too old’.”, he laughs as he shakes his head. 
The two of you casually talked for what felt like minutes before you glanced at your phone and realized it had actually been over four hours. Eddie opened up to you, talking about his family especially his uncle, his dreams of being a rock & roll legend, and things he enjoyed like D & D. 
“I know absolutely nothing about that game! Lol. I wish I did though. It seems like fun.”
“Oh, baby, it is. Maybe you’ll let me teach you one day…see that pretty face behind the flower…”
“Pfft, how do you know my face is pretty? Lol.”
“Because how can a gorgeous soul like yours not be gorgeous.”
Eddie’s words gave you pause as your breath caught in your throat. He had said it with so much confidence to that you couldn’t help but physically hide behind your hands.
“I hope I’m not being too forward. I don’t mean to make you nervous or anything.”
“No…you don’t make me nervous…I think you’re just wasting that charm on someone my age.”
“Hm, well, I may be younger but I can still be Daddy.”
As he winks at the camera and smiles your whole body comes to life. 
“Eddie…there’s something I should tell you…”
“Did I move to fast? I’m sorry. It’s so weird but I feel like I’ve known you for years, you know? Fuck, probably sounds like a line.”
His hair moves from side to side as he shakes him head in shame and laughs making you laugh along with him. 
“It does but that’s alright. I’ve never done anything like this before. Not just the whole online thing but…the Daddy thing… God, that sounds so stupid.”
“No, no, baby, you don’t sound stupid. May I ask, sweetheart…did you like it?”
“Like what?”
“Hearing me refer to myself that way; as Daddy.”
“Yes.”
Eddie’s smile stretches across his face as he bites his bottom lip and leans back in his seat. 
“I wish I could see you. I’m picturing you like blushing and being all giggly. Fuck, the thought of seeing you like that turns me on.”
Your breath shakes at his words as your thighs rub together. 
“You’ve spent so much time talking and getting to know me, baby, I’d like to return the favor.”
“How?”
Scooting his chair a bit closer to the camera, he adjusts his body so you can see more of his lap and chest. 
“How’s this, sweetheart? Got a good view?”
“I can’t see your face very well.”
You vaguely catch it as his cheeks turn a bright crimson and he smirks as he messes with the camera once more so you can see all his face a bit better. 
“Most people on here want to see my abs or my cock.”
“With partners, I like seeing their eyebrows scrunch together or their mouth fall open.”
“Hear that whimper most men try to hide under their heavy breaths.”
“Fuck me, honey. You definitely have a way with words. I like it. What, um, damn, you threw me a bit off my groove there.”, he chuckles as his palm rubs up his pec and over his opposite shoulder. 
“Hey, don’t worry about it. Maybe…we can talk next weekend. I can schedule the session myself this time. 
“Would it be too forward if I asked for your phone number? I’d love to talk with you through the week.”
“I’ll talk to you later, Eddie.”
“Sweet dreams, baby girl.”
####################
You tried so many times to tell him about finding his account and how you were the girl he spoke with that Friday night, you really did. But the longer you waited, the harder it became. 
When he came in that Monday morning, Eddie had a different glow about him as he lightly tugged your hair and said hello. 
The week went by like normal and you spent every day hyping yourself up, finally deciding you would tell him on Saturday after surprising him by seeing him play at The Hideout. You figured he’d be in such a good mood that you showed up to see him, maybe he wouldn’t be so angry after you told him the truth. 
When you opened the bar entrance door, you were met with loud blaring music and a lot of young voices chatting over the music. Mumbling small apologies, you pushed past people to find a table near the stage hoping you’d be able to catch his eyeline so Eddie knew you were there. 
Lucky for you, they were already on stage preparing their equipment so you hastily snuck to the corner and called his name. When his chocolate eyes met yours, he smiled wide before seeming to freeze as he took you in. 
You weren’t sure what was normal for bar attire so you went with a green spaghetti strap dress with matching heels and light make up to accentuate your features. 
“Hey! I hope I’m not distracting you. I just wanted you to know—”
“Hey, no. No, no. You’re not…distracting me…”, Eddie interrupted as he jumped down from the stage to give you a hug. 
Fuck, he smelled amazing.
“Wow, sweetheart, you look gorgeous. I’ve never seen you in a dress before.”
“I wasn’t sure what was normal or…”
“Pfft, fuck normal.” As his eyes continued to run along your face, you both seemed to realize he hadn’t taken his arms off your waist after your embrace. “Fuck…I’m sorry… I don’t know what’s been going on with me lately. Usually, I’m a lot smoother than this.”
“Are you?”, you tease causing his grin to reappear as he takes a step back and pokes your nose. 
“There’s my work wife I know and love. Alright, I have to finish getting ready but please stay afterward and let me buy you a drink, ok?”
***
“Eddie, oh my God, you were amazing! I didn’t know you could play like that!”, you continued to compliment as he laughed, chugging back another bottle of beer in his grasp.
“Thank you, baby. Now, if you could advocate for us to get more record time so we can actually get something out.”
“Whatever you need. Do you have a shirt or maybe I can get a tattoo on my forehead.”
You giggle as he laughs and shakes his head. 
“No, Y/N. Would be a shame to damage a gorgeous face like yours.”, Eddie smirks as you bite your lip. 
“So, did your mom teach you to play guitar like that or did your uncle?”
The metalhead blinks, slightly taken aback. 
“What would make you say that? My mom or my uncle and not like my dad?”
“Oh, um, we’ve talked about your uncle before and you’ve never really mentioned your father so I just assumed… I’m sorry.”
“No reason to be sorry.”, he sighs as his gaze shifts to the table.  “My mom got me into music but my uncle taught me to play my guitar. My dad taught me other bullshit like how to hot wire a car and how to spend the rest of your life in prison.”
Your heart breaks for him and on impulse you lean your head on his shoulder as you place your palm over his.
“Yeah, this is why I don’t usually talk about myself.”
“You can always talk to me, Eddie.”
The man smiles softly as he lifts his arm to wrap around your shoulders and pull you closer to his side. 
“I’m glad you came, Y/N. It was nice seeing you out here bobbing your head and cheering for me.”
You laugh as he tilts his head against yours and his hand slides from your shoulder down your bicep. 
“I’m your wife. I thought it was about time to come see my husband play his loud records for the youngens.”
Eddie’s throat vibrates as he chuckles through his teeth but you barely notice as you nuzzle your nose into his neck and inhale the smell of his cologne. 
“You always talk like you were born in 1943 or something.”
“Psh, my body makes me feel that way sometimes.”
“Now why do I doubt that? With a body like yours, honey, I bet you feel better than any of these other girls.”
Leaning your head back, your eyes lock with his as your hand comes up to rest on his cheek so your thumb can caress his bottom lip. 
Just as his mouth is about to press to yours, you gasp as you push away from him. 
“Oh my God…Eddie…I’m…I’m so sorry.”
As he watches you panic, confusion floods his face and freezes him in place until you hurriedly push out the front door. Before you make it to your car, a ringed palm grabs your arm, pushing your back against an adjacent van as he crashes his lips to yours. 
It was a messy kiss but fuck did it taste fucking good. 
Pressing his forehead against yours, he allowed you both a moment to catch your breath as his tall, broad frame kept you boxed in.
“Please, Y/N. I want this…I want you…I want to feel you…”, Eddie whispered as his mouth ghosted your neck to your ear and your eyes rolled shut at the sound. “I want to taste you and hear all the noises you make, baby.”
“F-Fuck…Daddy…”
“Uh my God.”, he breathily panted as his hand absently reached for the door handle and opened the back. “It’s ok…this is mine…I promise.”
The metalhead didn’t even wait for a response as he lifted you by your waist and placed you inside, shutting the door behind him. 
As you crawled backwards further into the back of his van, he hastily climbed up your body to attach his mouth to yours again. Placing his knee between your legs, you took advantage desperate for friction to relieve the ache making you dizzy with need. 
“That’s it, baby girl, use Daddy’s leg. Fuck, I can feel how wet you are.”
Your fists grabbed at his shirt as you moaned against his lips. 
“Are you gonna cum, sweetheart? What a desperate little thing.”
The rhythm of your hips hastened as your grip on him tightened and your back arched as the coil snapped. 
“Good, good girl. Fuck.”
As his mouth attached to your throat, your fingers reached between you two and sloppily fumbled with his belt as he reached back to help you pull his pants just below his ass. 
“Holy shit.”, he whispered as your palm took hold of his incredibly hard cock and moved the cotton blocking your core to the side to allow him entry. “Fuck, baby.”
Your arms came around to cling to his shoulders as his head fell into your nook and he set a steady pace.
“Oh my God, Eddie…your dick is so big…” He grunted at your words as he rolled his hips, pushing his length as deep as your pussy would allow and then some. “I’ve never…I’ve had anyone so… fuck…”
“Tell me, honey, please.” When you don’t immediately respond, he lifts his head to kiss you. “You can do it, beautiful.”
“I-I’ve never had anyone so deep.”
“Fuck, baby girl. Tell Daddy how you want me to make you cum again. Do you want it slow?”, he asks as he gradually pulls all the way back till it’s just his tip before thrusting back into you. “Or do you want it fast and hard?”
“Faster, please.”, you beg as you wrap your legs around his waist.
Eddie does what you ask, his head falling again as he roughly pounds into your cunt. Your fingers tangle in his hair and his own palm slides behind your back, holding you to him as your body trembles and your pussy squeezes him like a vice as you cum. 
“Shit…good, baby. Fuck, you choke my dick when you cum…so fucking tight…where do you want my cum, honey.”
“In-Inside, Eddie, please.”
He started to lift his head to make sure you were sure, but your hand kept him against your throat as you rolled your hips to meet his eliciting a loud grunt from him as his mouth fell open.
His whole frame collapsed on top of you as his pace faltered and you felt his release paint your walls. The strangled groan followed by his heavy pants were the sexiest things you had ever heard and as you lazily turned to look at his face his mouth was waiting. 
Compared to his other kisses, this one was much more tender. 
A soft kiss between two people who had known each other and been friends for a long time. When he pulled back, his chocolate eyes met your irises as his fingers caressed your cheek. 
After a few moments, he silently pulled out of you, kissing your forehead when you winced before crawling towards his glove box and rifling through it. 
“Shit. I thought I had tissues… Ok, um, let me grab some napkins real quick from inside and then…if you’re up to it…maybe we can go to the diner and have some dinner…talk?”
You nod, smiling as he fumbles with his own pants and belt while almost falling out of his van before catching himself on the door. 
“Fucking shit! Uh, I swear I’m more, uh, graceful than that…ok, I’ll be right back.”
################
Eddie was an absolute gentleman that night; taking you to dinner where you got to know him a bit better. Afterward, he drove you home and walked you to your door with a smile that you returned with a soft kiss. 
After closing your door, you looked through the peephole to find him beaming wide before throwing his hands in the air in victory and heading back to this car. 
You dreamt about his arms around you and thought about him all morning, the subtle soreness between your legs a constant reminder. 
“Hey. Just wanted to let you know I was thinking about you and I hope you’re feeling ok. I have to work tonight for a bit but maybe after I can call and we can talk?”
You smiled at his text before the realization hit you that his “work” was the website and he still had no idea you were one of the accounts he was talking to. As if to emphasis that a point, a notification flashed on your screen reminding you that you had a session scheduled with Eddie the Banished later that evening. 
Opening the computer, you sat there preparing your speech and apology, ready to tell him everything but when his face illuminated your screen it gave you pause. Before when you saw him online, he usual had on just sweats or boxers but this time he was wearing a long sleeve shirt with a Dio album on the front. 
Still donning black sweats, he had his hair pulled up and out of his face making you smile. 
“Hey, sweetheart. I hope it’s ok but I need your advice.”
“You want my advice?”
“Yeah. You seem incredibly smart and with our last conversation I know you’re easy to talk to.”
As Eddie grinned nervously, you couldn’t help but blush as your fingers flew along the keyboard.
“How can I help?”
“Ok, so I was playing my show last night and this girl…woman…I work with finally showed up to see me. I’ve been asking her for months to come and each time she said she couldn’t for one reason or another. Usually because she said she was ‘to old’.”, he laughs, rolling his eyes. “She’s not. She’s probably the same age as you since she’s a Millennial to but anyway… I loved seeing her come out of her shell, you know? She danced in her seat and headbanged; it was so fucking cute.”
As his smile grew at the thought you bit your bottom lip at the sight. 
“After the show, things got…intimate… and, um, so I guess my question is…how do I tell her about this?”, he asks as he gestures towards his computer and camera. “I don’t want her to think I’m like…a whore or something. I do this for the money because call centers pay their fucking employees jack shit. Add in the fact that I still kind of need to do it because my band and I are SO close to finishing this record but I don’t want her to be uncomfortable or feel like I’m cheating or something. I’m not my dad… I don’t fucking know…”
“Honey.”, you type as he covers his face with his palms. “Breathe. It’s ok. The fact that you’re even thinking of all this I’m sure will mean a lot to her. Eddie, I have to tell you something.”
“I just don’t want to lose her. No one has ever made me feel the way she does. At work I get a glimpse of what a relationship with her would be like and I love it. She’s so funny and sweet. Whenever she’s frustrated, her cheeks puff out like a chipmunk and she sighs like she wants to throw her computer out the window. When she smiles, the entire room lights up. She’s so beautiful, you have no idea.”
“Have you told her any of this?”
“Before last night I didn’t think I stood a chance. In my hometown, people don’t exactly like me. The Munson name carries a lot of weight because of my dad. He conned so many people here and add in the fact that I grew up in a trailer… they see me as trash. It would kill me if she saw me the same way. 
“No, Eddie. She would never think that.”
“Then she makes jokes a lot about her age and sometimes I get worried that she’d see me as like a kid or something. I’m highly aware that a man her own age could probably give her way more than I ever could but… I don’t know. Maybe if she can call me Daddy like she did…she can see me as someone who can take care of her because I will, honey. I don’t care what I have to do.”
“Sounds like you already know what you have to do :). Just talk to her, baby. She… she may surprise you herself.”
“She surprised the hell out of me last night. When she called me Daddy, I almost fucking came in my jeans. I’m sorry. Don’t mean to be crude.”, he grins as he sticks out his tongue towards the camera. 
“It’s ok lol So it was good? The intimacy?”
Eddie’s gaze shifts off camera as his teeth drag along his bottom lip. 
“We’re friends right?”
“Of course.”
“It was the best I’ve ever had, Millennial. Fuck, her lips tasted amazing. I can only imagine what her pussy tastes like. Shit… It happened so fast I wasn’t able to take my time with her but next time… I’m going take her on a date Friday if she says yes. I want to take her to dinner and really make her feel special. She deserves that. Then I’m going to explore her gorgeous body till she’s begging me to stop.”
 Your thighs rubbed together at his words as that similar ache between your legs lit a fire in your belly. 
Without thinking about it, you grabbed your phone and texted his number. 
“Eddie when will you be free??”
Instantly, you heard vibration on his side of the stream and watched as he leaned forward to grab his device. As he smiled down at the screen, you felt your need for him rise as you watched his long, thick fingers fly along the phone’s keyboard. 
What is it about this man that has you feeling like this?
“I can be free now. Why? Everything alright?”
“Yeah, I’m fine. I just…”
“Do you think you could come over?”
“Hey, uh, Millennial, I have to go but I’ll keep you updated. Maybe next time you can give me your number and we can keep in touch. I may need more advice!”
Your brain is too foggy to register how that will be a problem later as you type out your goodbyes and he signs off. A moment later, another text from him comes through to your phone. 
“Yeah, I can be there in ten minutes. Are you sure you’re alright?”
“I need Daddy.”
The three dots flash on you screen for a millisecond before he replies, “I’m on my way, baby.”
***
Eddie’s fist barely has a chance to knock before you’re opening your apartment door and tugging him inside by his collar, roughly bringing his lips to yours. 
“Ro-Roommate?”, he asks as his eyes briefly notice the two bedrooms. 
“Work…works…overnight…”, you answer between passionate kiss as you tug off his leather jacket and he lifts up your shirt tossing it aside. “Need you…please…”
“I got you, sweetheart. Daddy can take care of you.”
You practically melt into his embrace, backing him into the living room wall and yanking off his shirt so you could drag your lips down his chest as you start to descend to your knees before he grabs your arm.
“No, no, honey. I said Daddy is taking care of you.” With one swift turn he spun you around, placing his palm beside your head to steady himself. “You’re so beautiful, Y/N. Can I taste you, baby? 
Eddie smirks when you emphatically nod and places a soft kiss on your forehead. 
“Can you say it?”, he whispers. “Tell me what you want.”
His eyes stay on yours as he slowly falls to his knees and his palms reach up to pull down your underwear till you were completely naked. While his lips gently pecked along your belly, your own hand reached out to pet his head. 
“I want you to feel your t-tongue in my pussy.”
As his smile grows, Eddie abruptly lifts one of your legs over his shoulder and dives into your cunt, doing what you requested. With every flick of the muscle between his teeth, you felt yourself falling deeper into euphoria. This metalhead definitely knew what he was doing and reveled in it as his tongue roamed. 
“Oh…Oh my God, Eddie. Just like that…” 
Your fingers pressed him harder against you and his moan vibrated through you at the sensation. As he picked up his pace, his mouth overwhelmed you as he sucked and made out with your clit till he felt your body quiver as you came. 
Rising to his feet, you circled your arms around his neck as he slid his middle and ring fingers inside of you trying to elongate your high. 
“I knew it. I knew you tasted like fucking heaven. Fuck, such a good girl.”
After pushing down his sweats, you licked your palm and wrapped it around his girth, his glassy eyes fluttering at the feeling. 
Eddie’s free hand cupped your cheek, tilting your head so he could see your face. 
“Daddy’s gonna take real good care of you, pretty girl. I’m gonna make you cum so fucking hard on my cock. Goddamn, I keep thinking about how tight your little pussy gets when she cums. Fuck, baby, you drive me crazy.”
You suddenly let him go as your hand flew down to grab his wrist trying to push him away as you whined.
“No, no, sweetheart. Don’t run from it. Daddy’s got you. Give in to it. I’m right here.” At his murmured words, you continued to cling to him as your hips rolled against his fingers. “Atta girl. I know, I know. Cum again for Daddy, baby.”
A string of uhs left your lips as his eyes remained glued to your face and your nails dug into his skin as the coil snapped. 
“Goddamn, you are so fucking sexy.” 
You couldn’t help but giggle as his mouth latched onto your neck and you carefully guided him to your bedroom while tried to stumble out of his pants. 
“Motherfuck—I swear I can walk.”, he jokes as you both fall naked onto your bed. 
“Well, only if your pants are on correctly.”
Eddie laughs as he pushes up on his forearms to look down at your beaming features. Your index finger gradually extends to caress his cheek and along his chin, grazing the light stubble that clung to his skin. 
“You’re handsome.”
At your compliment, his jaw flexes as he tries to contain the obnoxiously huge smile that wants to stretch from ear to ear at your adorable tone. 
“Thank you, sweetheart.”
“I mean it. I always thought you were.”
“Yeah?” You nod, biting your bottom lip to contain your own smile. “You want to know a secret?”
“Hm?”
Eddie crawls a bit further up your frame, gently kissing your jawline till he finds the shell of your ear. 
“I always thought you were beautiful to, baby.”
Utilizing his knee, he pushes your legs further apart as he grinds his cock between your dripping pussy lips but before he could guide himself inside of you, your hand lightly pushed on his hip as you gently pulled his hair. 
His face flooded with concern as his eyes scanned you over. 
“I want to see your face this time, Daddy…Please…”
A relieved chuckle left him; thankful you were ok. 
“You’re going to kill me, honey.”
Licking his lips, you watch as Eddie’s eyes momentarily shifted to the void as he reached between your bodies and pressed his mushroom tip to your entrance. When his irises found yours again, he brought his arm back around and tenderly petted your head as he slowly thrust his cock inch by inch. 
“You’re doing good, baby girl…taking me so he well.”, he praised when he noticed your eyebrows twitch in what appeared to be pain. “Talk to me, sweetheart. Do you need me to go slower?”
“No…No, Daddy. You’re… you’re just…”
“Yeah? Just what, princess?”
“You’re so big.”
“I know, baby, I know but you’re doing so good. I’m almost all the way in.”
“Y-You can…you can go harder…you d-don’t have to be so—fuck—gentle.”
Eddie stops moving for a moment as he smirks down at you before suddenly smacking his hips into yours eliciting a loud moan from deep within you. 
“Like that?”, he teases as he pounds into you again. “I told you…Daddy’s got you.”
Finding a faster rhythm, he kept his intensity as he repeatedly abuses that sensitive, spongy spot deep within you that has your mind reeling. 
Pushing upright onto his knees, the metalhead pressed your thighs flat into the mattress as he watched himself disappear inside your cunt. 
“Shit—your pussy feels too fucking good. Cum again, Y/N. Cum on Daddy’s dick, baby.”
“Something…something’s different…”
Eddie slows for a fraction of a second before he realizes what’s about to happen. 
He sees it all over you scrunched face. 
Licking his thumb, he presses it to your clit as he keeps a steady pace. Again, your hand tries to grab at his wrist but he’s much stronger than you as your movements don’t deter him. 
“It’s ok, sweetheart. Daddy’s right here, baby. Just let it happen.”
A wave of pleasure stronger than you had ever experienced before washes over you as the ball in your tummy drops and you scream his name. 
“Atta girl! Fuck, Y/N.”, he groans, his thrusts faltering as he pumps his release deep inside you. “Fuck…it’s ok…you’re ok.”, he pants. “I’ve…I’ve never made a girl squirt before.”
It took him a moment but it was only then that he realized you were crying. 
“Hey. Hey, hey, what’s wrong, baby. Talk to me.” Your arms wrap around his neck as you hug him and he continues to try and comfort you. “Everything’s alright, Y/N.”
“I-I-I’ve never done that before. I…ruined the moment…”
“Oh, honey, no. No, you didn’t ruin anything.”, Eddie cooed as he moved back to allow you to sit up and he could wipe your eyes with his thumbs. “What just happened was incredibly fucking hot.”
“It was?”
“Yeah, beautiful girl, it was. I’m honored to be the first guy to make you cum hard like that. I mean…of course being your husband only IIII can do that…”
At his joke, you laugh as you reach out to lightly hit his bicep as he giggles along with you. 
“How about this? Let’s get you into a bath and all clean, then I can change the sheets and get you in some nice comfy pajamas.”
“Will…will you lay with me after?”
Caressing your cheek, he leans towards you to gently kiss your lips. 
“Of course.”
After your bath, Eddie gave you some alone time to complete any needs you felt you needed to complete before bed and as soon as you were done, you stepped out of your bathroom to find him just finishing making the bed.
“I hope this is alright. I found these sheets in a closet in the hallway.”
“These are actually my roommates.”
“Oh… well…sheet.”, he jests, smiling when you breathy laugh. “Sorry, bad joke.”
“I like it.”
Stepping towards him, you grab his arm and push him under the covers so you could curl up into his side. Lifting his arm, he circles it around your shoulder and you pleasantly sigh as he plays with your hair. 
“At some point, sweetheart, we’re going to have to talk about this…us…”
“Is that bad?”
“No, fuck, I made it sound like it was going to be. I just…there’s some things I need you to know…about me…my life—”
Your palm cuts him off as your eyes meet his. 
“Later. Tonight, I just want to be close to you like this.”
“Yeah…”, he sighs before craning his neck to kiss your forehead. “Me to.”
###################
@dashingdeb16 @myherometalhead @fireeyes-on-teller-dixon-grimes @twirls827 @micheledawn1975 @chelebelletx @hardladyheart @spiderxbatty @twirls827
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sillymommy6969 · 2 days ago
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.𖥔 ݁ ˖ THE BISHOP & HER QUEEN ᝰ! S.L.
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your superhero love story with kate bishop sophia!
˚⟡˖ ࣪ ⋆౨ৎ ❪ ℎ𝑒𝑎𝑑𝑐𝑎𝑛𝑛𝑜𝑛𝑠. ❫ 。 katebishop!sophia x f!r 𖥔 fluff, hawkeye au ── disclaimers: mentions of violence, trauma, injuries, kissing, harsh language, enemies to lovers, yelena belova!reader / ℭatalogue
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✵ KATEBISHOP!SOPHIA, of all the enemies you’ve faced during your time as an assassin/spy, is the hardest to kill for some odd reason. she was one quick, stupid little amateur
✵ KATEBISHOP!SOPHIA, who was so offended the first time you refused to fight her because you “didn’t have time for it”
✵ KATEBISHOP!SOPHIA, whose mentor was the one you were really looking for in hopes of getting some answers regarding the whereabouts of your sister. when you broke into the underground training facility her frequented, instead of finding him and torturing the answers out of him like you had initially hoped for, you found her eating pizza
✵ KATEBISHOP!SOPHIA shot up with her mouth full and her cute chow chow, charlie nibbling on some crusts
✵ KATEBISHOP!SOPHIA, who scrambled for her bow on the opposite end of the resting couch behind the boxing ring. by the time she had her weapon in her hands, you were already gone, no longer standing where you were mere seconds ago
✵ KATEBISHOP!SOPHIA, who couldn’t put up much of a fight when you pinned her to the ground in the flash of an eye
✵ KATEBISHOP!SOPHIA’s bow and arrow being kicked as far as you could with her under your knee. you leant down, shushing her as her dog barked feverishly at you. once she ceased her grunts of struggle, the hand you had pushing her head into the wood let go. you asked, “where’s barton?”
✵ KATEBISHOP!SOPHIA, “why the fuck would i tell you?”
✵ KATEBISHOP!SOPHIA, who mumbled curses and yelled at you to get off as you looked around for any clue or signs of the man you were hunting. when you noticed a surveillance camera at the very corner of the gym, you turned back to her
✵ KATEBISHOP!SOPHIA, who promised to not making any stupid decisions when you started playing with charlie, scared you’ll hurt her big, fluffy boy if she made the wrong move
✵ KATEBISHOP!SOPHIA who shot death glares at you as you sauntered around and examined the place, she rubbed her sore neck as you took in every detail you could, all the while eating a stolen slice of her sausage and mushroom pizza
✵ KATEBISHOP!SOPHIA absolutely hating your guts
✵ KATEBISHOP!SOPHIA immediately whining to clint about you pinning her to the ground with ease once she warned him of your arrival. for somebody who just heard they were being hunted down, he was very comfortable teasing sophia for her lack of skill when it came to physical altercations
✵ KATEBISHOP!SOPHIA who started training harder after
✵ KATEBISHOP!SOPHIA did lots of research on you, initially finding nothing, you were a nobody with no records and no names (which frustrated her to no end) until she snuck into the cia compound with clint once for a mission and found your file amidst those of wanted fugitives of the nation
✵ KATEBISHOP!SOPHIA who disliked you more upon reading your file; you were wanted in more than 40 states, for crimes like treason, massacres, and terrorism. not a single police force in any of those states, with help from fbi, cia and secret services has anybody successfully been able to catch you. so she made herself a promise then and there
✵ KATEBISHOP!SOPHIA vowing if she ever saw you again, she’d be ready--she was going to put you away forever so you wouldn’t be able to hurt clint, or anybody else for that matter
✵ KATEBISHOP!SOPHIA who goes to the gym more often
✵ KATEBISHOP!SOPHIA who forced clint to help her better her agility, her speed and her aim. she was getting much better by the second month since her run in with you
✵ KATEBISHOP!SOPHIA who found out about the red room through clint. she did her own research, reading about the horrific and tragic simulations young girls and women were subjected to for the sake of creating the perfect weapons. there were two names at the top of the best graduating classes of the programme--natasha romanoff and you, named the deadliest pair of siblings, dead or alive, internationally
✵ KATEBISHOP!SOPHIA who came home one day to you
✵ KATEBISHOP!SOPHIA immediately drawing her bow, her glossy lips pursing at the smirk you threw her way. you had a pot in your hand, stirring whatever was inside casually, as if she weren’t one release away from kebabing you in the heart
✵ KATEBISHOP!SOPHIA clenching her jaw, muttering, “what the fuck are you doing here? how’d you know where i live?”
✵ KATEBISHOP!SOPHIA feeling like just killing you before you can answer when you laughed at the question. you rose the fork, licking off whatever cheese was on it as you stared right at her. you smirked at the visible gulp from her. you set the pot down onto her dinner table, grabbing the bottle of sriracha. you continued prepping your meal, unfazed by the sharp tip pointed straight at you. “you’re cute, baby archer. you should really learn some survival skills, if you had people following you, you’d never know.”
✵ KATEBISHOP!SOPHIA, taken aback by your statement, felt her hands shake at the tightening grip she had on her bow
✵ KATEBISHOP!SOPHIA who had no choice but to put down her bow when you started feeding charlie some mac and cheese. “you’re a smart girl, laforteza, i trust you know you’re putting more than yourself in danger if you keep pointing that little toy at me.”
✵ KATEBISHOP!SOPHIA standing still. “what do you want?”
✵ KATEBISHOP!SOPHIA rolling her eyes at you explaining your grudge with clint whilst playing with charlie. the poor chow chow was a sweet dog, but right now he doesn’t seem to realize he was playing with the enemy. “i’m not here for you, laforteza. i work off an eye for an eye. and barton owes me his.”
✵ KATEBISHOP!SOPHIA insisting there is another way for you to get even without killing him. you shook your head at her pleads about him having a family, a life, yaddy yaddy yaddah, you kicked the chair opposite to you, gesturing for her to sit
✵ KATEBISHOP!SOPHIA obeying your instructions, sitting
✵ KATEBISHOP!SOPHIA who whistled, finally getting her hands around charlie to keep him away from you. the dog hesitantly leaped away from you, tail wagging and traces of mac and cheese around his lips and panting tongue
✵ KATEBISHOP!SOPHIA not being able to do anything when you stood to leave, pushing the empty pot towards her. you gave her a cheeky peck at the corner of her lips, hand patting her cheek. you blow her one last kiss before waving goodbye, dropping out the window and disappearing into the night
✵ KATEBISHOP!SOPHIA hating herself for letting you go that night when you left her apartment
✵ KATEBISHOP!SOPHIA had a feeling you would be coming by her apartment again one way or another. her and clint were no longer training together because you had tabs on her, which meant she could lead you to him. she could tell you were growing desperate because she was keeping her own tabs on you; she found out the fake identity you used off the id she swiped from you last time, and she tracks your paper trail
✵ KATEBISHOP!SOPHIA greeting you with a smile the next time you snuck into her home. charlie immediately pounced to greet you, pawing at your knees and licking your hand. you glanced up at her, reciprocating the smirk she was throwing your way. “well, look who’s all dolled up for me… am i really the special girl in your life, laforteza?”
✵ KATEBISHOP!SOPHIA kicking her pizza box towards you. “you loved my order the first time we met, thought i’d save you a couple slices.” you nodded, amused at the foreign behaviour
✵ KATEBISHOP!SOPHIA leaning over her couch, urging you to sit and you do. what can you say, you loved a woman who bosses you around. her hands grabbed the back of the couch, standing over you from behind as her head dipped to whisper in your ear, “look, cherry gordon,” she spat your fake name like it was venom, “you’re going to stop looking for my friend and you’re going to sit here because shield is on their way. we’re gonna have a chat here, and you’re gonna listen up.”
✵ KATEBISHOP!SOPHIA who thinks she has the upper hand, which you found absolutely adorable, but was so oblivious to the fact you’re always one step ahead. but you thought she was too adorable to ruin the fun for, so you let her feel like she knew what she was doing for another fifteen minutes
✵ KATEBISHOP!SOPHIA, who was super offended when you asked her if she was done with her little spiel
✵ KATEBISHOP!SOPHIA who didn’t even have time to react when you grabbed her neck that was over your shoulder. you flipped her over, standing from where you sat to pin her over the coffee table. you had her in a headlock, leaning down to, just like she had, whisper in her ear: “i’ll give it to you, baby archer, you found more than i thought you would when i left those little crumbs for you to nibble at. the thing is, i’ve found barton for weeks already. i’m just here because i couldn’t resist seeing you again--also, i brought you a gift, since you so kindly welcomed me into your home with the best kraft i’ve ever had.”
✵ KATEBISHOP!SOPHIA sighing in defeat at you managing to pin her again. she wasn’t one to give up, but she wouldn’t want to embarrass herself more by struggling and failing to free herself from your grasp
✵ KATEBISHOP!SOPHIA getting tied up, like a good girl
✵ KATEBISHOP!SOPHIA being strapped to a chair with a bruise forming around the cut on her forehead. her head hit the table a little too hard, but she was putting up a tough front for the sake of her aura. you grabbed her a bag of peas from the freezer, holding it up to her head as you cooed. “oh poor baby, you bruise like a peach,” you pouted, tending to her head, “if you didn’t try acting all cocky like that, this wouldn’t have happened. i did think it was incredibly cute, but i left more than three hints here and there.”
✵ KATEBISHOP!SOPHIA who was scared you had already hurt clint, but you assured her he was safe--“oh, barton? he’s just fine, laforteza, don’t worry. as long as you sit and listen for the next…” you check your watch, “ten minutes? before the shield team you called shows up? they’re horrible agents, really, just absolutely terrible.”
✵ KATEBISHOP!SOPHIA unsure of what to do, but obeys
✵ KATEBISHOP!SOPHIA not knowing if you were still trying to kill her or if you were just hitting on her so she calls you out on it. you laugh at the suggestion, “kill you? honey, when have i ever tried to kill you? if i wanted to kill you, you would’ve been long dead by now.” she was stupid, she knew you were right
✵ KATEBISHOP!SOPHIA who couldn’t understand why you were treating the bruise on her head, but you started talking
✵ KATEBISHOP!SOPHIA who couldn’t help but feel her heart race more than just because of the adrenaline, but because you were practically sitting on her lap as you spoke: “y’know, i really am flattered i seem to be on your mind, laforteza. food is the way to a woman’s heart,” you nodded towards the pizza, “but you’ve been such a delightful nuisance, i can’t have you tailing me and making my life just that bit harder anymore. so as much as i’ve loved this little game we’ve been playing, i’m making it clear it has got to stop.”
✵ KATEBISHOP!SOPHIA, noting the closing proximity between the two of you, she could hear the blaring sirens in a distance, as well as the helicopter buzzing closer with each passing second. you didn’t fret, very calm and collected
✵ KATEBISHOP!SOPHIA who watched you set the bag of peas on her lap before bidding her the last few words; “don’t worry, archer, i’ll be back when i get the agents off my back. until then, take care of yourself and little dani… i named him dani, i think it’s fitting. thanks for the pizza.” you leant forward, kissing her, long and slow on the lips. she didn’t flinch, she didn’t reject you--given, you already knew of her little crush when she acted like a boy picking on a girl on a playground--instead, she closed her eyes, savouring the taste of your lips on hers. deep down, she regretted calling shield now, even though you tried killing clint. she couldn’t wait to see you again
✵ KATEBISHOP!SOPHIA looking like a teenage boy who just got his first kiss, jaw dropped and in disbelief as you pulled back, hand tracing from her jaw down to her chest. your nail against the lining of her suit, she felt her skin crawl. you blew her a kiss, folding your fingers in a small wave. “until next time, cupid. try reading a spy 101 book, you might learn a thing or two about being subtle and secret.”
✵ KATEBISHOP!SOPHIA feeling her stomach flutter instead of churn watching you leave
✵ KATEBISHOP!SOPHIA feeling her bounds loosen
✵ KATEBISHOP!SOPHIA realizing you never tied her up in a dead knot, but was still found and humiliated in front of all the shield agents as she wrung herself free. she had to explain herself to the agents, and they were not happy to leave empty handed after the promise of returning to their headquarters with you in cuffs
✵ KATEBISHOP!SOPHIA desperately trying to find a way to contact you after, silently praying you’d come by her home, but she knew her place would be heavily surveilled. and she knew you were much smarter than that, you were no novice
✵ KATEBISHOP!SOPHIA misses you… will you swing by?
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˚⟡˖ ࣪ ⋆౨ৎ ❪ 𝖈alliope 𝖘peaks! ❫ 。 oh kate bishop sophia, how i long for the day i get to see you… thor!dani is probably next on my list so LESSSGETITTTT anyway hope you guys are enjoying the hero posts so far i’ve had a lot of fun making them. happy reading! xx
@sillymommy6969 © ──────────── Feb 2025
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pollen · 18 hours ago
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people are upset at this post and i wanted to say something about it because it directly pertains to the reason i wrote it in the first place.
some are frustrated at the post because they believe they can't live their lives because they have adhd. some are angry at the post because they believe they can't live their lives because they have chronic pain.
i have adhd. i have chronic pain. i am disabled. i wrote this post, in part, to encourage myself to approach my life as it is and do what i can within it to make it my own. it's awful not being able to be the exact person i wanted to be. i still have a life anyway. it's different than i planned, but it's still my life. and no one will live it for me, so i might as well start doing the living myself.
if you're neurodivergent, have chronic pain, struggle with your mental health, and/or are in any way disabled, this sentiment absolutely applies to you and was written with you in mind.
it indescribably sucks when we have difficulty existing in our lives for whatever reason. said with the most love possible, it's still up to us to do what we can to make space for ourselves within the life that we're given.
what are you waiting for? someone to grant you permission? the perfect and permanent emotion? a shooting star to magic away every problem you have or ever have had? alright, wait away then. but no one is going to live your life for you while you wait to become someone else
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marsdql · 2 days ago
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Keep It Together [Y.JW]
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Synopsis: Struggling with your boyfriend’s new choreography, you throw a tantrum in front of his members, only for him to shut it down. His strictness stings, but when he realizes he hurt you, he softens—reminding you that he’s not just your leader but your biggest supporter. | @teddybeartaetae
Stern Boyfriend!Jungwon × Bratty Dancer!Reader | genre: Fluff, Light Angst, Established Relationship | wc: 1.3k
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The practice room was filled with the steady rhythm of the bass, the sound reverberating through the floor as the team worked through their latest choreography. Everyone moved fluidly—well, everyone except you.
You weren’t a bad dancer. In fact, you were one of the best among your peers. But for some reason, today just wasn’t your day. The steps weren’t syncing, your turns felt sloppy, and your footwork was just a beat off. No matter how many times you tried, you just couldn’t get it right.
“Okay, let’s run it again!” Jungwon called out, his natural leader mode in full effect.
The members groaned but got into position anyway. You sighed, shaking out your limbs before the music started again. This time, you were determined to nail it.
Except—you didn’t.
Halfway through the sequence, your movements tangled up again, and you tripped over your own feet. The frustration that had been simmering beneath the surface all practice boiled over in an instant.
“Are you serious?!” you yelled, ripping your in-ear out as you stomped away from the group. “This choreography is so stupid! Who even came up with this?!”
A chorus of surprised reactions followed.
“Oop,” Sunoo muttered under his breath.
“Heeseung, get the popcorn,” Jay whispered.
“Someone’s about to throw hands,” Jake chuckled.
Ignoring them, you ran a hand through your hair, pacing as your breaths came in quick, angry bursts. Your chest tightened, frustration crawling up your spine like fire. It wasn’t fair. Why was everyone else getting it so easily while you looked like a fool?
“You’re being dramatic,” Sunghoon said, tilting his head.
That was the last straw.
“Shut up, Sunghoon!” you snapped, throwing a towel in his direction. He dodged it effortlessly, laughing under his breath.
You, on the other hand, were fuming. You wanted to scream, throw something, maybe even flop on the floor just to get your point across. Your fists clenched, body tensed, and you were seconds away from doing something embarrassing—
But then a firm hand wrapped around your wrist.
“Enough.”
Jungwon’s voice was calm, but there was an undeniable edge of authority beneath it.
You froze, breath hitching as he pulled you toward him. His grip wasn’t painful, but it was firm—unwavering. His dark eyes met yours, sharp with disappointment, and suddenly, all the fight in you wavered.
“Everyone’s watching,” he said quietly, voice low enough that only you could hear.
You swallowed, suddenly hyperaware of the room. The others weren’t even trying to be subtle as they watched the scene unfold, some looking amused, others slightly concerned.
“You’re acting like a child,” Jungwon continued, voice unwavering. “This isn’t how you handle frustration.”
Your jaw clenched, lips pressing into a tight pout. You hated being scolded, especially in front of the others. Your first instinct was to argue, to defend yourself, but Jungwon’s firm stare made you hesitate.
“I—I just don’t get it,” you mumbled, voice losing some of its earlier fire. “I’ve been practicing for hours, and I still look stupid.”
Jungwon’s eyes softened slightly, but his voice remained strict. “Then you try again. You don’t throw tantrums and embarrass yourself in front of everyone.”
That stung.
Embarrass yourself? Was that really how he saw it?
You pulled your wrist from his grasp, suddenly feeling small. Your earlier frustration morphed into something heavier, sitting like a rock in your chest. You didn’t even feel angry anymore—just… humiliated.
“Whatever,” you muttered, stepping back. “I’ll just figure it out myself.”
The teasing atmosphere in the room shifted. The others seemed to pick up on your mood change, their smiles faltering. Sunoo looked at you warily, and even Sunghoon—who had been poking fun earlier—straightened up, sensing that maybe this wasn’t funny anymore.
Jungwon exhaled, his posture loosening just slightly. “Y/n—”
But you were already grabbing your water bottle, turning away so they wouldn’t see the sting in your expression.
A few seconds of silence stretched before you heard footsteps approaching.
Then, warm hands settled on your shoulders.
You didn’t have to look up to know it was Jungwon.
His grip was much softer this time, his thumbs brushing against your skin in slow, comforting circles. You stood still, refusing to meet his gaze.
“Hey,” he murmured, voice no longer stern. “I didn’t mean it like that.”
You stayed quiet, staring at the floor.
Jungwon sighed before gently turning you around, his hands sliding down to hold your wrists. His grip, once firm and commanding, was now soft and careful.
“You’re not embarrassing yourself,” he said, his voice lower, meant only for you. “I just don’t want you to beat yourself up like this.”
You swallowed hard, feeling your earlier frustration ebb away, leaving only exhaustion behind.
“You were so mean,” you muttered, pouting.
Jungwon let out a quiet chuckle, shaking his head. “You needed to be stopped before you threw yourself on the floor.”
You huffed, but the warmth in his tone made it hard to stay mad. His thumbs rubbed slow circles against your wrists, grounding you.
“Listen,” he said, voice gentle now. “You’re frustrated because you care. That’s not a bad thing. But throwing a tantrum won’t help you get better.”
You knew he was right, but that didn’t make it any less annoying.
Still, as you glanced up at him—at the way his usually stern expression had softened just for you—you couldn’t hold onto your pride anymore.
“Will you help me?” you asked quietly.
A small, knowing smile tugged at Jungwon’s lips. “Of course.”
With that, he pulled you into a quick hug, pressing a soft kiss against the top of your head before stepping back.
“Alright, let’s go again,” he called out, his leader voice returning.
The others, who had been trying (and failing) to act like they weren’t listening, quickly got back into position. Sunoo gave you a thumbs-up, while Sunghoon mouthed, “Sorry,” with a sheepish grin.
You rolled your eyes but smiled a little. This time, when you danced, Jungwon stayed close, guiding you through every step.
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As the others took a break, Jungwon stayed close, resetting the music just for the two of you. His hands found your waist again, his touch softer than before—careful, almost like he was making up for how harsh he’d been earlier.
“Ready?” he asked, voice quieter now.
You nodded, though a part of you was still a little sulky. “I guess.”
Jungwon sighed, then suddenly pulled you in by the wrist, pressing a quick kiss to your temple. The warmth of it lingered, and you barely had time to process it before he whispered, “I’m sorry.”
You blinked up at him, caught off guard. Jungwon wasn’t the type to apologize unless he really meant it.
“I was too harsh,” he admitted, brushing his thumb over your knuckles. “I just didn’t want you to get stuck in your head, but I should’ve handled it better.”
Your lips pressed into a small pout. “Yeah, you should’ve.”
He huffed a quiet laugh, shaking his head. “Are you gonna stay mad at me forever?”
You held out for a few seconds, arms crossed, but when he leaned in and bumped his nose against yours playfully, you couldn’t help but smile a little.
“There it is,” he murmured, brushing a stray hair from your face. “Much better.”
Jake, who had been watching from the side, snickered. “Man, it’s crazy seeing Jungwon be all soft with someone who isn’t Jay.”
“Yeah, I thought he was about to scold y/n into the ground,” Sunoo added.
Jungwon shot them a warning glance. “Do you guys need extra practice too?”
They quickly shut up, but you could still hear them snickering.
Jungwon turned back to you, his fingers intertwining with yours for just a second before he gave your hand a squeeze and let go. “Let’s try again,” he said, his voice warm now, no longer strict. “No pressure this time. Just dance with me.”
And this time, when the music started, you didn’t overthink it.
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hamzaheaven · 22 hours ago
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Haiiii im scouring Tumblr in search of friends to lovers! or besties with feelings! hcs for Hamzah and im pretty sure ive read all of them lol so could you make do one pretty please??? 🤭
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friends2lovers!hamzah headcanons
a/n: oh my fingers have been ITCHINHGGGHGHG for something like this .. i couldve written an entire book on this but let me calm down . HOPE U ENJOY !! thank u for the req anon :-) warnings: none
SFW <3
─── ・ 。゚☆: .☽ . :☆゚. ───
friends 2 lovers!hamzah headcanons<3
friends but crushing:
gets increasingly more nervous around you the longer he knows you
looks at you for just a little too long sometimes
hysterically denies it when you do catch him staring 
literally doesn’t know how to act around you lol
will absentmindedly play with your fingers or the ends of your hair when sitting near him, and will then silently freak out as he zones back in and becomes too aware of what he’s doing lmao
a plethora of edits on tiktok shipping you two, speculation of “are they dating???” “did you see how he looked at her” galore
WAY too shy and awkward to make a move
makes many feeble attempts at flirting a little regardless
flirting to bf-gf !!!!:
freezes completely when you start flirting back
youre a little more bold about it, and he sometimes doesn’t know what to do with allat
making funny, suggestive jokes at him while filming videos or during the podcast, causing him to be even more flustered as it is on camera lol
gets a little unsure and anxious when it comes to physical affection, so it took a lot of pining and hesitation and yearning and frustration before the first kiss :o
after the first kiss yall beat around the bush like a bull in a china shop LMAO
however, slowly but surely, you naturally gravitate towards each other, and absentminded hand-holding and kisses on cheeks start to occur more often
at some point, it all flows so easily, he starts kissing you when he comes (the sfw one yall) and goes
 tbh he just starts introducing you as his girlfriend one day
“since when am i your girlfriend?”    “uhh… now, i guess…? if you want to, i mean…”
you say yes, of course
bf!hamzah:
still a little clueless on how to act now that he has you 
like he’ll quickly look away after kissing you, struggles to maintain eye contact for too long, gets flustered so easily it actually frustrates him a little
HATES pda, but is the clingiest, neediest mfer behind closed doors omg
loves laying with his head between your thighs so you can play with his hair (when he still fucking had hair .)
not that into petnames… finds it more meaningful to call you by your nickname <3
literally stuck to your side once you both touch the sheets
always falls asleep with his head on your chest, so you can, again, play with his hair (or caress his now bald head like polishing a billiard ball idk) 
loveeeeeees your perfume and your scent in general
becomes the actual textbook definition of ‘clingy’ when he’s gone on a cousin walk if u know what i mean hehe
half-lidded, red eyes, a sheepish grin on his face, shamelessly staring at you
followed by a hazy, dreamy, slightly sloppy make-out session iktr
we all know that man has a tendency to whine and moan and whimper no matter the situation so just imagine what he would sound like when kissing........... and other things LOL
he loves to slide his hands underneath your shirt 
ass & thigh guy for SUREEEE woah
a lot of unserious play fighting, verbally and physically
which of course causes him to gag for absolutely no reason
doesnt have a lot of experience in the love department but he feels sooo comfortable with you and you make him feel like he doesn’t need any experience at all to know how to treat & love you so good <3
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myerssimp21 · 2 days ago
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Iceberg's Jewel pt. 1
This is just another idea rattling around in my head! While this is still yandere Batfam, the premise is slightly different—here, they haven’t quite met you yet. The focus starts with Oswald Cobblepot and the Iceberg Lounge, but trust me, the Batfamily won’t be far behind. Timeline-wise, this would technically come first, even though in my other yandere Batfam fics, Tim and Jason have already had their moments with you. So yes, there will be a plot hole later where they’ve somehow already hooked up with you—just roll with it. Consider it canon-ish, but mostly just me playing around with ideas. tl;dr: This is a prequel of sorts to my other yandere Batfam fics, but I’m mostly here to have fun with the concept. Hope you enjoy! 💙 word count: 3201
Oswald Cobblepot prided himself on running a tight ship. The Iceberg Lounge was a beacon of opulence in Gotham, catering to a clientele that wanted their danger with a side of champagne. When he put out that little “Help Wanted” sign as a joke—an amusing way to signal to the people he was looking for that he was ready to onboard—he hadn’t expected someone like you to waltz in.
You were nervous but bright-eyed, clutching a copy of your résumé (how quaint) in one hand, wearing a Gotham University sweater that screamed student loans and part-time hustle. The smile you gave him when he walked into the lounge floor was disarming—too genuine for this city. You asked to speak to someone about the janitorial position, and Os had to bite back a laugh.
“A janitor? Here? Sweetheart, you might be too good for this place,” he muttered under his breath, too quietly for you to hear, before waving a hand dismissively at one of his goons. “Send her to my office.”
His office wasn’t where interviews were usually held—far too personal, far too… revealing. But for some reason, he wanted to gauge you himself. Maybe it was your naivete; maybe it was the way your gaze lingered on the crystal chandeliers and plush carpets like you’d never seen luxury this close before. You were looking at him as a normal boss, not a criminal mastermind, and he realized he might like that.
By the time you’d been seated in the chair across from his polished mahogany desk for only 15 minutes, he was already hooked. He asked simple questions at first—your availability, your experience—but quickly veered into territory that let him know more about you. Your classes at Gotham U were interesting, but you worked too much to fully appreciate them. You loved your psychology major but struggled with scheduling, hoping that the pay here was more than the measly pay you scrounged from your other two jobs. He listened with great interest as you spoke of your genuine excitement to be working in a "classy place like this."
He didn’t have the heart to tell you this place wasn’t really classy—just good at pretending.
Cobblepot tilted his head, the curiosity in his expression sharpening as he tapped a finger against the arm of his chair. “You’re not from here, are you?” he asked, a sly grin forming. “So, what do you think of our little city?”
“Oh, uh…” You laughed nervously, shifting in your seat. “It’s… something, that’s for sure. Gotham’s kinda like… I don’t know, a scrappy mutt? It bites, like, a lot, but you can’t help but wanna pet it anyway. It’s scrappy and loveable.”
Oswald chuckled, the sound low and genuine. “Lovable?” he repeated, shaking his head. “You’re a strange one. Most people run for the hills when it comes to Gotham.”
“Yeah, well…” You shrugged, the faintest smile tugging at your lips. “I’m already here, so I might as well figure it out, y’know? Plus, it’s not all bad. I mean, the people are tough, and the city’s got… personality. A weird, messed-up personality, but still.”
He found himself appreciating your honesty. It was a rare thing in his world—people who weren’t either trying to butter him up or wring him dry. And that smile… Hm. Something about it didn’t belong here.
Then, the door to his office slammed open. A goon stumbled in without so much as a knock, huffing like a dog chasing its own tail as he fumbled a thick stack of papers in his hands.
Oswald snapped to attention so fast it was animalistic. One second, he was relaxed, bemused by you—the next, his face contorted with fury, his lips curling back in a snarl that made the dim office feel suddenly suffocating.
“What?” Cobblepot snarled, his tone cutting like ice. The very air in the room seemed to turn electric, humming with the promise of violence.
The goon froze mid-step, eyes darting between you and his boss. He looked like he’d just walked into an execution chamber by mistake.
Oswald’s teeth clenched so tight a vein throbbed visibly in his temple. “You knock before coming into my office,” he seethed, voice dropping to something far more dangerous than the initial explosion. Cold. Calculating. A blade slipping between ribs. “You wait. You don’t—”
Then, out of the corner of his eye, he saw you.
Frozen.
Wide-eyed.
And just like that, the change was immediate.
His snarl vanished. The storm passed in an instant, like flicking off a switch. The barely-contained rabid rage that had been twisting his face smoothed into something almost… embarrassed. Guiltily casual.
Cobblepot glanced back at you, then at the goon, then back at you. For a brief, telling second, he looked—not regretful, but calculating. Then he sighed through his nose, rolling his shoulders like he was shaking off an unpleasant thought.
"Handle it later," he ordered, voice abruptly warm. Silk-soft. As if he hadn’t just been inches from taking a man’s head off. His hand flicked lazily toward the door, a dismissive gesture. “Can’t you see I’m with someone?”
The goon scuttled out of the room like a kicked dog, the papers in his hands rustling violently as he clutched them to his chest.
The moment the door shut, Oswald let out a measured breath, as if centering himself. Then, in a whiplash-inducing shift, he turned back to you with an awkward, almost sheepish smile.
"Sorry about that,” he said, voice dripping with artificial sweetness, as if his outburst had never happened. He waved a hand, dismissing it entirely, his gaze keenly watching your expression for any lasting tension. “Some of my employees just don’t have any manners.”
You offered a polite, thin smile, still shaken, but brushed it off with a shrug. You had already figured this place wasn’t exactly warm and welcoming, but the speed at which his fury had vanished was... unsettling.
Oswald noticed.
He noticed everything.
And for the first time in a long, long while… he wasn’t sure if he liked the way your smile still had a hint of nerves clinging to it.
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The Batcave was unusually quiet, save for the faint tapping of Tim’s keyboard and the low hum of the monitors. Bruce sat at the console, watching the live feed from Oswald Cobblepot’s office. You were seated across from the Penguin, a mixture of nerves and polite excitement etched on your face. The Iceberg Lounge’s chandelier lights reflected in your wide eyes as you gestured animatedly, your Gotham University sweater and résumé betraying your earnestness in a city that thrived on deception.
“Can’t decide if she’s brave or just clueless,” Tim remarked, leaning back slightly as he toggled between camera feeds. “She walked into Cobblepot’s lair with a résumé. A résumé, Bruce.”
“She’s a student trying to make ends meet. That’s not bravery—it’s necessity.”
Damian’s voice crackled through the comms. “She really responded to a ‘help wanted’ ad? Tt. Typical. Of course that bloated bird would choose a naive one. She’ll probably end up scrubbing vomit out of his VIP lounge carpets.”
Tim tutted thoughtfully at Damian’s comment. “I mean…..he’s probably aiming higher than janitorial work for her. Did you hear the way he sweetened his voice?”
Damian scoffed but didn't reply. 
A new voice broke in over the comms—Dick, speaking from his position on patrol. “You think she knows what she’s getting into? Working there isn’t exactly safe.”
“She doesn’t,” Bruce answered simply, “But that doesn’t make her unique. Plenty of people stumble into Gotham’s underworld without realizing it. We can’t save everyone.”
Tim muttered, “Still doesn’t mean we should ignore it. If Penguin’s targeting her for something, we’ll want to know why.”
Damian chimed in again, his tone slightly mocking. “We already know why, Drake. He likes his toys naïve, optimistic, and disposable. She won’t last a week before she gets a reality check—or worse.”
Bruce’s eyes flicked toward the feed as Cobblepot stood, offering you a hand and gesturing toward the door. “They’re moving,” Bruce said. “Tim, keep the office feed rolling, and find another camera angle.” 
“We won’t have audio and depending on where he’s taking her, I’m not sure we’ll have visuals either.”
There was a moment of silence, the kind that spoke volumes in the Batcave.
Dick broke it. “She’s smart enough to know what Cobblepot is, right? I mean, who walks into the Iceberg Lounge thinking it’s just a nightclub?”
“People who don’t know Gotham,” Tim replied, scrolling through files, soaking in what he can on you. “..She’s a psych major at Gotham U, full-time. She’s been juggling two jobs already, so she’s probably just desperate for the paycheck.”
Damian’s tone turned sharper. “Desperation or not, she’s still a fool. You don’t wear a sweater with your university’s name on it when you waltz into the lion’s den.”
Tim smirked. “Guess she didn’t take Gotham’s prerequisite: Street Smarts 101.”
The screen now displayed the empty office, Cobblepot’s desk abandoned. You were out of their sight, and for the moment, out of their reach. But the Batfamily wasn’t about to let you disappear into the darkness of Gotham without a trace. Tim was scrambling to find a feed that would give them info as to where Cobblepot’s taking you, but at the very least, they have relevant info on you.
Dick’s voice again. “Did you hear her in that interview? ‘Lovable but scrappy.’” He smiled faintly at the words. “She actually likes Gotham. We should keep it that way.”
Tim again, confirming some details. “Transferred to Gotham U from out of state. No criminal record, no red flags.”
Damian’s voice cut in, sharp and dry. “Other than walking into the Iceberg Lounge with a résumé. That’s a red flag for stupidity.”
Dick countered, his tone softer now. “She doesn’t know any better. Give her a break.”
Jason laughed, his voice snarky over the comms line from his own patrol. “Oh, sure, Grayson. Let’s all gather around and shield her from the big bad city. What’s next, care packages?”
Dick sighed audibly, “Don’t you have a crime boss to scare right now?”
Jason chuckled, the sound low and warm. “Already done. You should’ve seen the look on his face. Priceless.” Another faint noise came through, likely the reloading of a gun.
Bruce’s voice cut through before Dick could respond. “Enough. Focus, Jason.”
“Whatever you say, B,” Jason replied breezily, though the teasing lilt was still in his voice. “I’ll keep an eye out, too, just in case our scrappy little friend stirs up any trouble at the Iceberg.”
Damian snorted. “I’ll enjoy seeing Cobblepot’s face when she quits.”
Bruce didn’t respond right away. His eyes lingered on your face, captured mid-smile on the monitor. Quietly, he murmured, “She’ll need another job. A safe one. I’m sure Wayne Enterprises will have something available for her.”
“Keep me updated,” Batman ordered as he stood, his cape swishing as he headed toward the Batmobile. “If she gets in over her head, we’re pulling her out. No debates.”
Damian’s voice came back, quieter this time, reluctant. “She’s already in over her head.”
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Little did they know, Oswald Cobblepot’s schemes for you were the furthest thing from exploitative labor. In his mind, the idea of you actually toiling away with a mop and bucket was quickly becoming unthinkable—borderline offensive, even.
The moment he saw the way your eyes sparkled with hope and determination, and saw the way you'd listed your good grades on your resume in a hopeful attempt at impressing him and proving your aptitudes, he’d decided he’d let you sleep on the job if you wanted to. Hell, he’d set up a whole suite in the back of the Lounge if it kept you close and content. You could waste time dusting the empty liquor shelves or filing nonexistent paperwork all day if it made you feel productive. What mattered to him wasn’t what you did—it was that you were here, where he could keep an eye on you.
But of course, Cobblepot wouldn't admit that to himself. Not yet, at least. No, this was just “good business,” he rationalized. You were a valuable asset—your charm and friendliness were enough to lighten up even the Iceberg’s darkest corners. You had a way of making the whole place feel... welcoming and warm, like you were untouched by Gotham’s grime and crime. Plus you wanted to be productive. He scoffed under his breath, amused. Of course one of the first fresh faces ready to work at the Lounge was also someone who he didn’t dream of involving in his actual operations. Just his luck.
So, if you decided you needed an afternoon nap in the dusty janitorial closet? He’d send a goon to bring you a pillow. If you scoured the cleaning supply catalog for hours without actually ordering anything? He’d find it endearing. As long as you were happy and oblivious to the underworld swirling just beneath the Lounge’s polished surface, you could do whatever you wanted.
Unbeknownst to them all, while they debated your safety, Oswald was sitting back in his office, already plotting ways to make your life easier. Sure, he’d keep up the charade of being your boss for now—keep you busy with harmless tasks so you didn’t get suspicious. But he wasn’t about to let you work too hard. Not his sweet, naive new hire.
You didn’t belong in Gotham’s shadows. And as far as Oswald Cobblepot was concerned, he’d make sure you never had to find out just how dark they could get. Or at least, he’d try. 
By the time Oswald walked you to the janitorial closet—a tiny, forgotten room in the back of the lounge—he was already plotting how to keep you close. The closet was practically empty, a detail that normally wouldn’t bother him, but the way your face fell at the sight made him want to slap whoever was supposed to manage the damn place.
"Um… is this where I’m supposed to… work?" you asked softly, your voice unsure as you peeked into the empty closet. Your eyes darted around, taking in the barren shelves and dusty floor, as though you’d missed some hidden stash of supplies. "It just… doesn’t look ready yet?"
"Ah… this won’t do," he said quickly, covering his irritation with a smooth smile. "Looks like someone’s dropped the ball here. Don’t you worry about this, darlin’. I’ll get one of my guys on it—someone reliable. You’ll have everything you need to get started." 
His tone was honeyed, and though he aimed for casual reassurance, his sharp eyes flickered to the shelves like he wanted to set the whole closet ablaze for offending you. For fuck’s sake.
“No, no, this won’t do at all,” Oswald said again, shaking his head and clucking his tongue like he was personally offended by the state of the janitorial closet. “You deserve better than this mess, darlin’. I’ll have it sorted by tomorrow, you have my word.”
You blinked at him, “If you want me on the job today, I can make something work,” you offered tentatively, gesturing toward the dusty shelves. “I’ve been in worse spots before.” You gave him a sheepish smile, trying to seem accommodating.
Cobblepot scoffed softly, waving a dismissive hand. “No, no, absolutely not. I won’t have my new employee starting off in such... subpar conditions. It’s a poor reflection on me, and I can’t have that, now can I?” He straightened his tie with an air of exaggerated importance before leaning on his cane. “Here’s what we’ll do instead. You take the night to get familiar with the Lounge—on the house, of course. Have some drinks, relax, mingle a bit. Consider it my way of welcoming you to the team.”
You blinked again, even more confused. “Oh, um, that’s really generous, but shouldn’t I, like… fill out some paperwork first? Or sign something?”
Oswald chuckled, a warm, low sound that almost made you feel silly for asking. “Paperwork? We’ll handle all that boring nonsense tomorrow. No need to rush into the dull parts of the job, eh?” He gestured toward the door, ushering you back into the main lounge. “For tonight, enjoy yourself. Swing by the bar, meet some of the staff, maybe say hello to the security team. It’s important to me that you feel comfortable at the Iceberg.”
You hesitated for a moment, unsure if this was some sort of test, but his expression was disarmingly sincere. “Well… if you’re sure…”
“Positive,” he interrupted, clapping a hand on your shoulder with surprising gentleness. “Now, off you go. The night’s young, and the Lounge is at your disposal.”
As you stepped out of the closet and back into the opulent main floor, you glanced over your shoulder to see him watching you with a smile that seemed too genuine for someone of his reputation. You didn’t know him, but you’d heard some things. 
Unbeknownst to you, Cobblepot wasn’t just offering you free alcohol or a night to relax—he was staking his claim. He wanted you to feel at home, to see the Lounge as a safe haven, a place you’d always want to return to. Sure, there’d be paperwork eventually, but for now, the only thing that mattered was keeping you here, comfortable and unaware of the darker dealings hidden beneath the glamour.
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Tim leaned back in his chair, toggling between the camera feeds inside the Iceberg Lounge. He was alone in the Batcave now, the others out on patrol in the city. “Well, there she is,” he muttered, zeroing in on his view of you at the bar. You were perched on a sleek barstool, your Gotham University sweater a stark contrast to the high-end fashion of the Lounge’s usual clientele. “She’s… drinking. A lot.”
Jason, freshly back from patrol—or what little of it he actually bothered to finish—sauntered into the Batcave, pulling off his helmet and setting it down with a thud. “That’s her?” he asked, nodding toward the screen.
“Yeah,” Tim replied without looking away. “You decided to show up?” His eyes flickered to the time down at the bottom of his monitor. "Thirty minutes early? B's not gonna be thrilled."
Jason ignored the jab, stepping closer to get a better look. “Huh,” he muttered, crossing his arms as his sharp eyes drank you in. You were laughing at something the bartender said, your cheeks flushed. You gestured animatedly with your glass while saying something they couldn't hear. “She doesn’t look like much.”
Tim raised an eyebrow, glancing up at Jason. “That’s what you cut patrol short for? To see her in person?”
Jason shrugged, his gaze fixed on you. “I was curious. Heard you and Damian going back and forth about her. Figured I’d check it out for myself.” His lips quirked into a faint smirk. “Didn’t expect her to be… this.”
Tim tilted his head. “This what?”
Jason gestured vaguely at the screen. “This… normal. Sweater, messy hair, drinking like she’s celebrating her midterms being over. Doesn’t scream ‘Iceberg Lounge material,’ y’know?”
Tim chuckled, toggling to another camera feed for a better angle. “That’s kind of the point. She thought she was interviewing for a janitorial position, Jason. Janitorial.”
Jason blinked, then snorted. “You’re kidding.”
“Wish I was,” Tim said, leaning back in his chair. “She walked in there with a résumé—an actual paper résumé—and asked about cleaning floors or whatever. Cobblepot probably laughed his ass off before offering her a drink.”
“He’s footing the bill by the way,” Tim added, toggling to a feed that showed the Penguin subtly watching you from across the room as he conversed with some guests. “She hasn’t reached for her wallet once. He’s just… letting her.”
Jason’s eyes narrowed as he studied the Penguin’s expression. There was no malice there yet, no obvious scheme in motion. Instead, Cobblepot looked almost… satisfied, like he was pleased with what he was seeing. “The hell’s his angle?” Jason muttered, his top lip curling in disgust at the possibilities.
“No idea,” Tim replied. “But if I had to guess? He’s trying to butter her up. Make her think the Lounge is a safe place, keep her happy and oblivious while he decides what to do with her.”
Jason scoffed, leaning back against the console.”She won’t last a week.”
Tim smirked. “You’re awfully invested for someone who just met her. Maybe you should prep a care package.”
“I didn’t meet her,” Jason shot back, though his eyes flicked back to the screen almost involuntarily. “I’m just saying, someone needs to give her a reality check before she gets eaten alive.”
“Maybe,” Tim said, watching as you swayed slightly to the music, chatting with another patron who’d joined you at the bar. “But she doesn’t look like she’s in danger. Yet.”
Jason grunted, pushing off the console and grabbing his helmet. “Yeah, well, I’m keeping an eye on this one. If Penguin tries anything, I’m ending it.”
Tim raised an eyebrow. “Oh, so now you’re helping? Didn’t you just skip the last half of your patrol?”
Jason smirked as he turned toward the exit. “Hey, monitoring Gotham’s underworld is part of the job, isn’t it? I’m just doing my part.”
Tim shook his head with a laugh as Jason disappeared up the stairs. “Sure you are.”
Back on the screen, you were oblivious to the scrutiny, to the way the curiosities of Gotham's vigilantes were beginning to blossom into something more.
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kimberellaroo · 10 hours ago
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Just a fun fact to add to all of the above, equestrian events are one of the few Olympic sports that are not segregated by gender (for the riders or the horses), and yet it's a sport that is so dominated by women by sheer numbers and achievement in recent years that there has been some complaints that there should be more effort into "empowering" men and boys to take up the sport to maintain gender equality. Which is just interesting in regards to points above about people getting upset when men start to get dominated in sports by women
It's not that men aren't allowed to compete, and the barriers to equestrian sports are much more along the lines of wealth and facilities to care for and train with the horses rather than comparative muscle mass and physiology of the human rider, so there seems to be relatively little reason for the gender disparity in that regard. So is horse riding considered to be emasculating now, is that the barrier? Is toxic masculinity holding them back, or something else?
Previously women hadn't been allowed to compete in equestrian events up until 1952, and even in that year they could only compete in dressage. And you know, once upon a time women were meant to ride side-saddle, if they were allowed to ride at all. So I just find it interesting that in this one sport where genders compete freely that there's been this total reversal of gender domination
call me ignorant but i genuinely don’t understand why sports have to be split up by gender.
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ycoil · 22 hours ago
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thankyou everywon, for coming to my show today! ^w^ it is me, your host! hiii my name is whimsy!!! ✨ hahaha~ ♥️ (applause follows that quickly trickles away as i abruptly grab one of the audience members and put them in a chokehold and they keep tapping out but this only makes me strangle them harder and we're struggling and thrashing about on the stage, i lock my legs around theirs to stop their increasingly desperate flailing kicks from connecting and their eyes are bulging out of their head as their complexion pales but for some reason no one is stopping me)
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onceinamillionposter · 1 day ago
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Yandere!L&D band headcannons
a/n : i literally just felt silly so I mean why not
Lead Vocalists : Rafayel
Drums: Sylus
Guitarist : Zayne
Guitarist : Xavier
Lead rapper : Caleb
With you as the manager !
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Right off the bat, it was hell. You got hired from your last gig because your last managing job didn’t quite work out with a whole money laundering scheme being run behind the scenes and you having no idea, you were broke to say the least.
That was before you got that DM, the old manager of the L&D boys is retiring , and apparently you would be a good fit- although your face was all over the news. You practically jumped to the opportunity, signing your life away as you knew it.
You got situated slowly, being introduced to the members - Caleb and you hit it right off the bat , as well as Xavier and Rafayel but Zayne and Sylus were quite distant.
You learnt about them, Caleb would often pick on the others , Rafayel would be trouble just for the fun of it , Zayne was busy reading books and sketching new designs for the band and Sylus was often talking to two twins? You never pried and he never told. Xavier would always be asleep on the common room couch but would wake up when you were desperate for things done.
You had gotten used to the routine, managing accounts would have Rafayel sitting scrolling on his phone in your office often asking ,”Do your eyes not get tired looking at the screen? Why don’t we just go out!” Often you were able to get him to stop bothering you but sometimes he would drag you out regardless making it a bit too intimate.
When it was spring cleaning day , you and Zayne often bonded in silence, sometimes you asked the him about his interests, learning he’s a fan of medicine and drawing anatomy which garnered your attention so you would discuss about what you knew.
Sylus and you would work out at the gym, turning into a competition sometimes. He would help you box and you would show him pilates which he never (openly) struggled with. Sometimes you guys would go on morning runs - very early runs just so people don’t get the wrong idea.
Caleb, and you would bond over board games - monopoly, uno, hell even chess! Anything to keep the day moving. Also investing in the newest consoles (he has the bank of a billionaire he just wanted to tease) , and surprising you with them became normal. Just dance was an interesting time!
And finally Xavier, you and him watched movies and shows together and it was so fun - for you - often enough Xavier just fell asleep but when he woke up, you would cook together or at least try. He burnt more than cooked but that way okay, cause in the end the cupcakes were edible- sure they weren’t the best but they were consumable (when you look past the dark crust)!
You usually had to help them get things set up, stages, events and outfits. Everytime the tailor came in you figured that you would be sitting in a different room but for some reason or the other, everyone - minus Zayne - found a reason for you to be taking their measurements. Shirtless , might I add.
Rafayel claimed the tailor was incompetent - as if a novice like yourself would be any better , Caleb said that the tailor kept scratching at him - you took a peak at the nails and they were the dullest acrylic’s you had ever seen , Xavier said they made him uncomfortable but they had a squeaky clean record last time you checked and Sylus - ever honest - simply said “I hate them.” (you had to make them sign a non disclosure agreement after all of this)
One way or another you slowly were apart of their daily routines. But then the stranger things came, the weird lack of dating claims, back before you became manager there was tons of women that were accused of being with them but suddenly it was quiet. Too quiet, and then the first leak of you came with you and Sylus in an uncomfortably ,weirdly, intimate position. Slowly the media turned heads, it was strange it had been awhile since they had been in. any romantic spectacles and the media love drama.
Another time was Rafayel holding your hand and you holding his plushies he won at the arcade, him dragging you to the next stand. At the time it was anything but romantic but now it looked like a common date? To say the media blew up was a surprise, you had to practically beg Rafayel to make a video clarifying it was just getting him new stuff for his room.
Again a stupid photo really, Caleb holding your clip board so high you had to get on your tippy toes, it was backstage so you had to guess it was the people backstage who were working that took that awfully blurry photo- a pain it was really.
You and Zayne- to your surprise- also got a photo! Hooray! You took him out to satisfy his sweet tooth, he insisted he couldn’t work without it - (he just wanted you to himself) - maybe it was the setting? It being a kitty cafe but you know what - you still don’t know but it garnered attention , another tweet to the main profile for the boys.
But the worst, Xavier resting his head on your shoulder after a long day at the studio. He was so close, too close for you to even make an excuse at the time. But either way the criticism rolled in,
“L&D boys pass around,” “Manager managing all 5 boys”, “Common whore?” It frustrated you so deeply you wished to quit the job as much as you were payed , deciding it wasn’t worth it. But you didn’t know , they weren’t giving you up like that. Not when they slowly loved you, not yet.
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curious about your take on riddle's dream. i have seen people en masse claim that riddle yearns to a deliquent/"if he wasn't traumatized, he would be in a pop music club" and... it feels like such a literal interpretation (although there are some who are obv just joking) to the point of misinterpretation? i'm not very invested in riddle's story arc, but to me it read like a pretty clear "what if i was the worst version of myself (which riddle has been raised to see as being disobedient) and i was still loveable".
[You can read my thoughts on the book 7 chapter 12 part 3 update here!]
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I think there’s a lot of different ways to interpret the dreams because of how… vaguely they’re written + their length + every player coming into the dreams with their own experiences which inform their POVs. For this reason, I don’t feel comfortable outright stating X or Y interpretation is “wrong”, and nor do I wish to be used as a means to validating one interpretation over the others. All I’m going to do this ask is explain how I personally interpreted Riddle’s dream. That’s all.
I don’t think Riddle wants to be a delinquent; this would be conflating a child’s desires to that of a delinquent. Yes, Riddle was detained be a police officer—but not for any violence or serious criminal actions. He was detained for singing in front of the police station (without a license) and causing a public disturbance (because of his amplifiers). Furthermore, Riddle doesn’t engage in any other criminal behaviors (unless you count not going to school, but a minor isn’t usually held liable for that; the onus is on his parents for not sending him). I think it would be more accurate to say that Riddle’s wishes are very child-like ones. He wants to be able to play with his friends all day, he ignores studying and obeying rules, he can eat tarts and drink sugary tea whenever he wants, he has doting parents that are always emotionally there for him, etc. These are not marks of delinquency, they are the innocent longings of an inner child that never got to be recognized.
While I don’t think it’s a guarantee that Riddle would be in Pop/Light Music Club had he had a more lenient mother, I do think that Riddle would want to explore creative outlets. He is noted as having a very strong imagination, but is limited in his life experiences and struggles to think for himself or to act outside of the concrete, as is defined by rules and laws. If these restraints were loosened up and he had actually been allowed and encouraged to explore other avenues, he might have found an interest in the arts and expressing himself through that. It could be a visual medium, a written medium, a musical medium, whatever.
I think music is what we jump to right away because he has a band in the dream, but I could easily see him dabbling in other areas too. Maybe music was chosen because it’s a group activity, and Riddle longs to be that setting. A happy family, a boy with lots of friends, you name it. You could also argue that Riddle went with music because that’s what he knew from his dorm members. Adeuce are in athletic clubs, which Riddle is sort of rubbish at, and Trey is in Science Club, which of course covers topics Riddle would already be studying irl. Cater’s club is the only one with a significant degree of creativity allowed. Riddle might have based his hobby in the dream off of Cater’s experiences. One telltale detail that supports this theory is that Riddle mentions people keep leaving because the band can’t stick to one genre, which is also true of Cater’s irl Pop/Light Music Club. Another thing to consider is that Riddle is able to conjure the look of delicious cakes and cookies but not replicate the taste because he’s not familiar with it. You could say this is also true of his being in a band. He looks the part, but we never hear him participating in it—perhaps because Riddle could have seen Cater rushing to a club meeting in his outfit, but not have actually heard him play. Therefore, it’s possible that Riddle’s dream is just pulling from his shallow understanding of what “being in a band” is about… the camaraderie of it. This, again, loops us back to Cater’s relationship with his fellow club members. It’s less about the actual playing and more about the vibes and hanging out with one another. Maybe Riddle heard stories from Cater about this and got curious? This same logic applies to other aspects of his dream. He seems to emulate what he has heard from his dorm members in general. Loving parents who are there for him (like Trey), the bout of delinquency (like Deuce), the ability to speak his mind (like Ace). Riddle is wanting to be more like his peers, who were able to have “normal” experiences. To me, it feels like he used his dorm members as templates (which he combined with his own desire to have a fulfilling childhood) because Riddle himself doesn’t have a clear concept of what it means to live freely. After all, he only has like 1-2 months of playing with Trey and Chenya to go off of compared to a few years with his Heartslabyul classmates.
As I said earlier in this post, I don’t think the Riddle we see in the first layer of his dream is meant to be “the worst version of himself” or “Riddle but disobedient”; it reads as more of Riddle indulging in everything he missed out on in his childhood. Sweets, parental love, playing all day with friends, loudly and openly expressing himself through music, exploring creative ventures, making happy memories… I don’t believe these are bad things or borne out of Riddle wanting to be rebellious or disobedient, they’re just consequences of acting like a kid.
I do find it interesting that so many aspects of himself were entirely written over. However, I don’t see it as Riddle thinking he has to be a different person (as in, having a different personality?) in order to be worthy of love. Riddle was definitely still able to make friends as a child even with the quiet personality he had then. It was possible. Nothing in his backstory makes me think Riddle believes he wasn’t deserving of love—but he may think that love has to be earned, that love is conditional. And what is that condition? Following the rules, obeying, performing well in exams. That’s what he was taught would earn him success and his mother’s love and that’s what he enforced in early book 1. I think… Riddle definitely wants to be someone else, but in the sense that he wants to be born into different circumstances. Parents that get along, a dad that has time for him, a mom that dotes on him, no magic, no expectations to shoulder, lax rules, etc. This ties in with Riddle wanting to live the childhood he feels he never had. A childhood where he had no friends, where he studied all the time, where his mother calorie counted for him, where he was not allowed to play video games or watch movies, where he was not allowed to choose his own clothes or career or anything. Several of these sentiments were expressed post-OB.
Now that being said, everything I just discussed covers only the first layer of Riddle’s dream. I see the idea of Riddle thinking he has to be someone else coming through a little stronger in the second layer of his dream. That’s the part where everyone is being chased through the destroyed rose maze. Here, we see a much more extreme and even more domineering Riddle than what we saw in book 1. He lords over his students such that even his versions of Ace and Deuce have fallen into line and mindlessly follow his commands. The mob students are scared of him—and though Riddle is aware of it, he is content. They salute him and praise him for his iron fist. He is the most correct, after all. He is ruling just as his mother would, he is being the person his mother wants him to be.
This is expanded upon further in the third layer of his dream, in which he faces his inner darkness. Riddle confronts the truth: that he is desperate to cling onto the dorm leader seat, because that’s all he has going for him. He has driven away his classmates, who fear him and resent him. There’s his mother, but she has not granted him the affection he craves, and her approval is conditional. He is alone and unloved. This potentially recontexualizes details seen in earlier layers. Why is Riddle in a band? Maybe because he wants to be like Cater, who seems easygoing and approachable. Why does Riddle live many other aspects of his dorm members’ lives? Why do the characters conjured by Riddle’s darkness to fully believe that Cater wants to transfer to Scarabia—a dorm known for having a friendly and relaxed leader? It could suggest an insecurity in Riddle, a worry that he, as he is, is not enough. Not smart enough for his mother’s approval, not kind or cheery or normal enough to make friends. So all he has is his crown, which he reverently claims to. It’s one of the few things he has to call his own, a decision he made for himself and something he earned through his own merit.
But ultimately, I see Riddle’s truest desire as… being his own person, having his own independence and things he chose for himself. Not letting himself be ruled by the shadow of his mother. (His Phantom fittingly seems to dangle him on strings, as if Riddle is its puppet or marionette.) It doesn’t mean complete chaos or anarchy, and it doesn’t mean being like other people. It means defining his own rules for how he should live. Walking forward on his own path. Making his own identity, not tied down to that of his mother. Riddle is so used to being to do what to do or how to be—by his mom, by some arbitrary set of rules. The fact that he confesses to the things he actually wants after his OB… that he wants to stand up to his mother over winter break… that he confronts the dream version of his mom with the declaration that he will open this door with his own hand, that he will walk forward on his own path… I think that says a lot.
…. Weeeeell, like I said at the start, that’s one interpretation 🤷‍♀️ It’s not necessarily “correct”, and it’s liable to change (especially since all of this information is still very fresh; I’m still taking the time to digest it myself). The wibbly wobbly dream magic is open enough to invite all kinds of interpretations, so I encourage you to take this all with a grain of salt and to come to your own conclusions?
I think it’s interesting that it’s Riddle’s dream that has resulted in many different interpretations, especially on the English speaking side? I wonder if that’s because the average EN player skews younger, so those fans can relate a lot with the struggle for identity and finding freedom from one’s parents, even if their circumstances aren’t exactly the same as Riddle’s. We project our own experiences and feelings onto Riddle, which informs our interpretation of his dream.
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