#i struggle voicing this stuff but wow i love it sm

[msp9]

THIS IS MY LIKES AND DISLIKES OF CHAOS THEORY ⚠️Spoilers below cut⚠️

When i first finished this season, I too like some people, was skeptical about it. I get why some people say its bad, I just thought it was very different from cc. At points the characters didin't feel like themsleves, the way some of them were written and the designs gave me a real hard time to get used to them. Also i felt as if it was just too much to process at times so i rewatched it and my final answer is that its a good show the pacing is incredeble, the plot, the suspence and character development. i just had a hard time getting used to everything new? Ig. I'm still doubting whether its a 10 but sure thing is that it was a very good first season its a easy 9/10. So here are the thinks i liked abt it:

-THE WAY THEY POTRAYED EVERYONES TRAUMA/STRUGGLES , Sammy having anxiety, Yaz overcoming her ptsd, and KENJI. MY BOY. That must have been the best breakdown i've seen in animated series. Whoever wrote that scene. Wow. It was the best thing in the whole show honestly. His vision gtting blurry, having truble breathing. The panick. Wow. I CANNOT SAY THIS LOUD ENOUGH.

-Ben and Sammy duo? Hello? Im srry to say but you might just be better than Yaz and Ben duo. Idk i really loved them.

- "Benjamin."

- Showing Yaz is doing better. Despite her ongoing struggles, she has clearly grown and matured the last 6 years, and the way she calmed Sammy in the sinking van? Ig all those therapy sessions and college paid off. That scene is a clear illustration of the progress she has made. I mean sammy did say "i can tell shes still struggling" but there wasnt really a clear scene of her getting stuck in place as she used to. So my guess is that it was just Sammys anxiety and the fact that they didint talk much. Bc then Sammy was surprised how she kept herselve together. So yeah

-YASAMMY. NOTHING MORE TO ADD.

-UM SAMMYS CHARACTER?? HELLO? GLOW UP, CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT, i loved her sm. She moved up to my top 3.

And her anxiety? It was so well shown too

-the fight between Sammy and Yaz felt so natural and not at all forced. They both had valid points and in the end they did understand each other and were on the same page.

-Ben being Ben in almost every episode

- Yasmina's "boo."

-Brooklynns design?? Majestic to say the least.

- ingore what i said ealrier abt the acting out of character. They do remind themsleves they just grew

Well, all except Ben...

-Kenjis new voice actor, he did a real good job, as much as it doesn't sound like him, he really captured some emotional scenes very well.

- The robot lady. THEY REALLY SAID TAKE A WOMAN AND MAKE HER CREEPY ASF. I was genunanly creeped out. And the detail that at the ranch if u listen closesly u can hear the whistle. Hell nah that was scary.

-Benrius Ben and Darius friendship, okay actually u can't tell me u didint feel it too, the tention between ben and Darius cmon we all know what u are Ben stop making up girlfriends in Europe

-Brooklynn turning bad, or from what we are told worked for bad people ig. Personally as much as it shocked me, im sure theres a good reason as to why and i cant wait to hear more abt in season 2.

-I can now undertand what everyone meant in reviews saying "its more mature" not only in the more death and dinos but it woyud be kind of confusing for a younger audience to undertsand some stuff in this show.

-I really liked Daniels kon death, maybe it wasn't necesarry but im all in for that dark death scene.

-Lastly the comment Sammy makes when Ben asks how bumpy got pregnant, and the yazs smirk. Gurl i was suprised they added that but i loved it

Now, the things that i didint like and why:

- First of all, Darius being in love with brooklynn. I mean i get it but i also dont get it. In my opinion, there shouldn't have been a different reason as to why Darius was the most effected by her death. They were close and she died. Its okay to be really effected by someones death and not bc u liked them, and i also do believe that the reason for him not showing up the night she "died" should have been smth more serious. Then again i get it bc now he felt a lot more guilt bc it was for a not so important reason he didint show up and thats why he didint tell anyone. Well axtually it isnt that bad, but i just felt it was forced for the plot. This again could be bc i started to like kenlynn and now they turned the tables completly but sure.

-Brooklynns voice actor. I just couldn't connect her to brooklynn? She sounded a lot different, not a major bad thing it was just hard to get used to.

-Ben having a gf, or supposedly having one, u telling me this man has a gf:

I thought it funny but yk that man is a homosexual

- and lastly, Brooklynn being alive. This might sound bad but it made sense for her to die. And i was kinda lamed out that she wasnt dead. (Pls ironically enough, just weeks ago i begged for her to be alive.) But like the way everyone suffered bc of her death, going throught the 5 stages of grief, and the way the show was played. It just would have been better if she died, all those flashbacks, the emotional moments, i mean its not gonna be the same when i rewatch it bc i know shes alive. Anyways enough abt this.

Actually i have nothing more to add to my "bad stuff" list but i might come up with smth later. Bc i will be rewatchibg it obviously. Ig lastly i just wanted more episodes how dare they cutting the season of right there.

[cosmobrain00]

wanna talk about your ocs some moreee? (plsplsplsplsplsplspls)

DO I. vibrating at incredibly high frequencies rn what better place to start than once again w the yarrow siblings bc WOW. THEY DRIVE ME NUTS!! like. for example ive been thinking of bella again more recently n feel incredibly sick ovr it all, ik I briefly mentioned sm stuff abt her before BUT? shes actually the eldest sister of all time guys n let me explain:

where to even begin. she was the first of her parent's eventual "failures", while being graced w gen love n kindness at first from them they quickly grew "tired" of her n she could never understand why. one day they were indulging her whims, pinching her cheeks n letting her come everywhere w them, n the next she was tugging at her mother's skirt hem n her fathers hand asking to be picked up n they only tiredly looked at her this time n told her to "stop being fussy" n that was that. when she heard they were having another kid it felt like she was being "replaced" n her chest hurt so bad and her eyes welled up n she ended up running to her room n slamming the door n crying into her pillow bc she just wanted her parents back n knew that now she'd really never get to have them again. when her baby brother was finally born tho, her mother made her hold him n at first bella only frowned sullenly down at him bc really- this is what they were replacing her with? but something inexplicable softened inside of her against her will when he softly smacked his little fist against her chest n ended up snuggling closer to her, n she ended up walking around the house simply carrying him for a while until he fell asleep so her mom could rest. when they eventually realized there was something wrong w myer- that being his near inability to see pretty much anything- suddenly he wasnt their cute kid anymore he was something that was "too much work" bc of this, n so what do they do? they pawn him off on bella of course, n u can guess how well that goes over. not only have they replaced her but now they've turned her into myers sole caretaker pretty much bc theyre gone so much of the time (AT AGE 8 MIND YOU.) once, bella shut the door in myers face n told him to go away, only to open it hours later n see him sitting right outside fiddling w the carpet in the dark. she felt so guilty tht she started crying n hugged him close n said she was sorry over n over. like she really felt like he “took” her parents love at first, but now? it feels like he's simply in the same boat as her n she has no choice but to step up for him bc if not her then who else. tht doesnt mean she still didnt struggle w him, far from it in fact, but while she has these mixed emotions, she also knows that despite myer not being able to see her much, whenever he hears her voice its enough to bring him running from the opposite end of the house to her n that means something to her. AND I HAVENT EVEN GOTTEN TO KEITH N LORELEI YET THE FUCK OF IT ALLLLL. when bella once AGAIN hears tht her mom is having another kid, TWINS this time she nearly loses it because she simply doesnt understand why both her n myer arent good enough n why theyve been discarded. when keith n lorelei arrive ofc its only a matter of time bf theyre all but pushed onto bella to take care of, n shes so so tired at this point but she simply steels herself n accepts bc she wont allow them to be abandoned. keith is a sullen little brat who's too angry so much of the time but she understands bc shes like that too deep down still. lorelei nearly never sleeps n her n keith cause so much trouble tgt but shes also the one to hug bellas leg n tell her she loves her no matter if they just fought or not. n bella may feel bitter but she'll still read them the books she found at the dump at night n listen to them all n let them pull on her apron n whine when shes trying to make things n like. they annoy her so much she wishes her parents never had them she doesnt know how to live without them now she'd do anything to protect her broken little family she wouldnt know what to do if she lost any of them, n all of these feelings just explode when the draft comes n her parents abandon them all n now its officially her turn to be the head of their fam. do not even get me started on bella being the one to go to the war in place of myer either bc I will not stop SOMEBODY SEDATE MEEEEE

[c-kiddo]

I love your neurodivergent/mental illness headcanons 💜 I love how they're so non-judgemental about even things that people usually say are inherently bad, like beau being low empathy and struggling with tone of voice to not sound grumpy etc. I'm autistic and mask constantly (I don't think I know how to stop masking at this point) and it's such a relief to my brain to read about people like me just existing in their natural ways as a neutral/good thing.

aw :''-3 wa, yea. . like beau not realising her tone is so canon i think.. like theres one time she asks essek i think if he wants to stay for dinner and literally sounds Do you want to stay for dinner 😠? and also times where fjord n caleb point it out and she totally overdoes it in the other direction. .. .audhd beau so real.

also ya i think low or confusing empathy rep is important n good, because like, people are so weird about it.. sometimes, when youre autistic empathy is just confusing n thats just true. like i get mega hyperempathy sometimes (struggle sm with any second-hand embarrassing things,, get hyper-empathy abt fave characters n stuff and animals and people irl sometimes too) but also like, sometimes its just??? blurry? i guess. doesnt help that its hard to read people so like, how do you empathise with them if you cant even tell what their emotions are in the first place ksjnfskfks. its tricky, and also a totally neutral thing, just depends what you do with it i guess :-o

also ya ya ay masking is tricky n im sure i do it but i kinda forgot a bit , so my little treat to myself is headcanon that cad doesnt mask vry much at all except for when he goes into like emt mode grief counsellor modes. and he has his scripts n stuff (thats nice. wow thats nice. thats a lot.. for example),, but apart from that he makes noises for fun all the time n stims n stuff because its just good and fun . only sometimes needs some help through conversations :'-3

[pelagaios-a]

what if Percy had been the one to help Kronos instead of Luke ?

finally some dark!percy content || accepting

my dude my bro my homie you dont know how pleased seeing this ask in my inbox made me highlight of my slow trip home before my phone died. but I have many thoughts on this topic. just to keep things organized I have these posts: [ Percy’s thoughts on Luke ] [ their parallels ] [ on him being a hero ] [ this post on Luke’s fate ] [ would Percy switch places with Luke ] just to keep things consistent…. also [ this recent post on this exact thing bless ] okie dokie now thats done, here we go !!!

okay so to start this off I just want to make it clear that, at least to me, it seemed Percy had every reason to do so. just looking at whats happened to him alone ??? and we know canonically Percy holds a lot of anger and resentment at their actions and choices. to me, I think the main reason Percy doesn’t end up joining Luke and Kronos’ army is two things

Percy’s fatal flaw is literally personal loyalty. the idea of turning his back on people you care about — no matter the circumstances / end goal — is so unfathomable that it’s hard for him to understand Luke’s actions. 

Luke betrayed Percy’s trust early on ( if we remember the scorpion at the end of book one when Luke tries to kill him before disappearing from camp ). Percy had put a lot of faith and trust in Luke alongside the fact Luke was someone he had looked up to. I think if Luke hadn’t pulled that stunt then Kronos would have had a much better chance at recruiting Percy to their side rip

but god like, think about if Percy gets so tired of it ??? everyone at camp expects something from him and not only does Percy not know what that is, but he gets consistently treated like someone different over it. if we remember anything from earlier on in the books Percy is someone who sticks to the back and tries not to draw attention to himself ( having grown up being a constant target for bullies and with an abusive stepfather ). at camp Percy is the center of attention and it’s a lot to put on him. Percy breaking under that pressure ??? listening to Luke’s words ??? finding relief in the fact all those people and expectations and voices are no longer bearing down on him to do something he didn’t think he could ??? Percy revels in it.

then there’s the whole thing where most gods have tried to off him almost. Percy’s powerful and they don’t trust him. why should he fight for those who don’t even give him a chance ??? it’s stupid to think he 1. doesn’t know what they’re thinking and 2. never debated another option for himself. imagine Percy turning his back on the gods ( once a twelve year old who overpowered Ares with no training ) and releasing his anger indignation on them. it’s stated that they’re scared because he’d much to powerful, they’re scared of the fact he can and will overthrow them. it just feeds to his feelings on the matter.

basically ignoring your question for a bit I love the thought of Percy joining Kronos because Luke’s words get to him, they’re that repetitive “what if” in his head every day. it haunts him enough to give into the voice in his head saying “Luke’s right, it will be better.” and Percy find’s it so freeing. Percy gives into the pieces of himself he represses because they’re not “acceptable” in the way that’s expected of him. he’s angry, he’s manipulative, he’s vindictive and vengeful and cunning. people forget that he laughed while fighting Kronos’ army with a smile on his face. Percy with Kronos ( assuming here that in this setting Kronos doesn’t use Percy as his vessel — as was the original plan ) unabashedly enjoys the destruction he causes. 

his loyalty just flips to the other side.

now, Percy instead of Luke ??? I’d say Kronos would have had to get to Percy first. honestly that also brings into the question would Percy even know he’s a demigod because Luke stealing the lightning bolt is the reason he’s brought into this mess in the first place. assuming there’s some event that triggers Kronos and his army finding Percy first ( and something happens within they earn Percy’s trust ) then we know how catastrophic that would end up being. Percy himself is a one man storm who has little training and understanding of his powers — Percy under Kronos I would bet money would have much more training both in swordsmanship and his powers. that alone is enough to show the mess he will cause. I’d imagine Kronos would also cause Percy to mentally feed on more darker aspects ( read: like the Tartarus stuff ) which would in essence transform him into a very willing and very skilled killer.

the Percy we know has grown to be a better person. he is someone who cares about others and works to help people. Percy under Kronos ??? someone who has learned to grasp his hate instead of letting it go. knowing the Kronos stuff to I’d bet Percy winds up at the hand of some mental conditioning, too. the world falls — maybe he dies — but he enjoys every moment of it. for what greater achievement is there then to topple the gods with your own hands?

[talsiaa]

Tattoo Shop AU - wolfstar

*not my art but it’s stunning <33 it’s by @savysami !*

Pairing: Sirius Black x Remus Lupin (I love wolfstar sm)

Summary: Sirius owns a tattoo parlour. Wolfstar fluff ensues. Also, they’re not wizards and Remus isn’t a werewolf :)

Warnings: tattoo stuff -needles, blood, pain. 

Word Count: 1420

A/N: This is apart of @band--psycho​ ‘s bingo challenge, I’m so excited to be apart of it :)) Disclaimer though, never once have I ever been into a tattoo parlour so this is what I assume happens but I could be wrong so read it with a pinch of salt if you actually know about tattoos. Hope you all enjoy <3

The soft glows of sunset brushed upon Remus’ skin, bringing out his freckles, as he paced back and forwards in front of the tattoo parlour he was booked into about 15 minutes ago. At first, he had not been phased by the idea of getting a tattoo - ever since he was a teen he thought they looked incredibly attractive and was so sure he wanted one. Now, however, as he stood reaching for the door handle for what must have been the fifth time, he was unusually nervous. What if it hurts too much? What if he hates it? What if he flinches and causes the artist to mess it up? With the many doubts running through his head, he had not yet spotted the amused-looking tattoo artist watching him through the window from the front desk. Deciding he could no longer sit and watch his 5 o’clock appointment pace in front of his shop, Sirius Black made his way outside, startling Remus as he opened the front door.

“So are you going to pace out here all night or would you like to come in?” Sirius mocked, still giving the other young man a warm smile as to not scare him off. 

“S-sorry, I just, erm...well...” Remus stood like a deer in headlights at the (rather attractive) man in front of him, not really having a reason for his pacing that wouldn’t completely embarrass him.  

“Don’t worry, most people who come in are nervous for their first tattoo.” Sirius reassured him, nodding his head into the parlour and holding the door open for Remus who very uncertainly took the hint to go inside. 

The parlour was unexpectedly cosy - a small fireplace opposite the front desk making the art-covered walls glow orange. Pictures of past work hung above the desk and Remus couldn’t help thinking how beautifully talented you must be to be able to do any of it.

“I’m Sirius, by the way.” Sirius walked past Remus, towards a crooked spiral  stair case in the corner of the room. Remus supposed he should follow.

“I’m Remus. Sorry, I am quite late.” Remus with his six-foot-something frame struggled to fit in the passageway at the top of the stairs, ducking his head when he went under a light.

“Oh, it’s okay. You’re my last appointment and anyway,” Sirius now turned around to smile at Remus once again, walking backwards through a door that let to a tiny break room. “I enjoyed watching you pace, it was cute,”

“Oh, er, you saw the full fifteen minutes, huh?” Remus decided to chuckle instead of just combusting with regret, scratching at the back of his neck. Sirius hummed in response, flicking a kettle on.

“It’s okay, though, honestly. Loads of people get nervous coming in for their first tattoo...” the reassuring speech Sirius started was muted in Remus’ mind as he finally got to look properly at the artist.

Sirius Black was covered with tattoos. Tiny doodles peppered his skin, filling the space between some of his bigger pieces. On his forearm Remus noticed a constellation, although half of it was covered by the white shirt arms he had rolled up and untidily buttoned halfway up his arm. His skinny jeans didn’t quite go with the rather smart looking shirt, but once again Remus’ mind was racing because wow, Sirius Black was hot.

“So yeah,” Remus tuned back into Sirius’ words, both of them sitting round a small coffee table in the middle of the room on battered leather armchairs. “Drink your tea and we’ll talk about what you actually want tattooed. I’ll draw some designs and you can pick your favourite - oh, you don’t take sugar, do you?” Sirius asked just as Remus put his mug to his lips and shook his head. “I’ll answer any questions you have too, it might make you less nervous?” 

Remus gave a small, grateful smile at this and murmured a thank you, placing his mug onto the table while Sirius opened his sketch book. “I actually had a few ideas, but I’m not sure which I’d like to go with. So, one of them was the phases of the moon, maybe just below my collar bone. Or, this on my bicep,”

Remus quickly took out his phone and showed a picture he’d saved a few weeks prior.

“Not the writing, though, sort of just the circle bit,”

“Alright, great. Here, might be able to choose if you can see them drawn out.” Sirius thrust the sketch pad at Remus and he took it, biting his lip in concentration. The paper showed the tattoos he wanted drawn onto a rough sketch of both body parts. “If you want both that’s okay too. Like I said, you’re my last appointment so I really don’t mind if it takes a bit longer than expected.”

“Erm, can we do the moon phases one today and the other one another time? I’d hate to keep you late.” In reality, Remus wasn’t sure he’d stay 100% conscious if he got both done one after the other. He had just a little fear of needles. Sirius could definitely sense this was the real reason but didn’t push it.

“Definitely. Come on, we’ll go into the studio.” Remus followed him back out of the room and into the tiny corridor again but luckily went straight next door. In this room, everything was sleek and clean and smelled like disinfectant. A black couch stood against the wall, facing the tattoo chair. Drawers and plastic boxes of various equipment were organised about the room.

“Jump on the chair and pop your shirt off,” Sirius flicked the lamp attached to the chair on and sauntered across the room to get the tattoo gun, ink and disinfectant. 

Pulling his David Bowie tshirt over his head, Remus started feeling even more shaky and nervous. A pit was starting to form in his stomach and he didn’t like it one bit.

“Nothing to worry about, okay? You’re perfectly safe, I promise.” Sirius had made his way back to sit on a stool next to Remus with everything he needed sprawled out next to him. His voice low and soothing, making Remus suppose that even if he was in an unbearable amount of pain in the next five minutes, at least he’d have a really attractive man telling him it’s okay in the most enchanting way he’d ever heard. “If you need me to stop for a few moments just tell me. Afterwards I’ll get you a lolly if you’re a really brave boy, yeah?”

Although mocking, there was a quite a suggestive undertone to Sirius’ words. Remus took a deep breath and nodded while the other boy got to work, cleaning the area under his collar bone. The tattoo gun then graced his soft skin, making him wince and screw his eyes shut, tensing up a little.

“Just try and relax for me, Remus. You’re doing great, it’ll be over in a minute.” Sirius’ soothing words caused Remus to relax into the chair a little, the pain becoming a little duller as blood prickled to the surface of his skin, making it numb. 

After not long at all, the pain stopped and was replaced by an ache instead. Looking down, a perfect depiction of the moon phases was etched into his collar bone and he immediately loved it, even if it was reddened at the present. 

“There we go, all done. See, that wasn’t too bad was it?” Sirius started cleaning the gun, putting various bits back where they came from and helping Remus out of the chair. “You good?”

“Yeah, yeah I’m alright. I really like it, thank you!” Remus was grinning at him, and Sirius couldn’t help but grin back. 

Another five minutes and Remus had had his tattoo carefully wrapped up and was at the counter downstairs again, being given instructions on how to look after his tattoo until it heals.

“That’s a pack of all the stuff you’re gonna need to keep it from getting infected and swollen.” Remus was handed a plastic toiletries bag of different lotions and anti-bac stuff. “As promised, a lolly for being brave,” Sirius smirked as he handed Remus a strawberry flavoured lolly. “And, er, this is my number.” A small piece of paper with small digits was also handed over. 

“In case I have any problems with it?”

“Yeah, I suppose that too. But also,” Sirius leaned in over the desk separating them, his smirk only growing. “In case you wanna text me so I can ask you on a date.”

Remus had never blushed so hard.

[loves124]

Neighbor’s ch.1

Warning: language (sorry if it bothers you all but I usually sing like a sailor and tried holding back a bit more this chapter but there are still some word in here.)

Kinda fluff?

If there are any errors or mistakes please don’t hesitate to let me know :)

Also don’t hesitate to give me some fresh ideas

Thank you,

Love you,

Enjoy!

(Shouta Aizawa x fem!reader)

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

It's been a long day for you. As soon as you walked out the door this morning, anything and everything has been going wrong. You were running late and had to skip breakfast, you missed your train, you got scolded by your boss for showing up late, and you even grabbed your least favorite pair of socks. They have a little nub in the corner that always feels super weird on your foot and makes you feel uncomfortable in your body. As the day progressed, nothing got better. You just wanted to come home and cry on your couch while watching Ghibli movies and eating a pint of ice cream for dinner.

You could feel the familiar lump in your throat forming, and your eyes were stinging from holding back your tears. Today was just so frustrating, and all you wanted was for it to be over. The more you thought about it, the heavier your emotion was. Thank God that your shift was finally over with. Looking at the time, you saw that it was 7:30 and you needed to hurry to catch the last train home.

As you headed home, you could feel your feet dragging behind you, sniffling and letting some tears fall. You finally reach your complex and continue walking to your apartment door.

A man is standing by the railing near your apartment door. He has a cigarette hanging from his lips. Taking a second to lean away from the railing, he pulls a hairband from his wrist and gathers his long ebony hair pulling it back into a messy bun. He looks a little disheveled: wearing some black slacks to pair with his black V-neck shirt.

You can see some cardboard boxes packed around him as well. It takes you a second to realize that the apartment next to yours has been vacant for weeks now. Mrs. Honda, your landlady, might've finally found an occupant.

Great. Your first impression to your neighbor is going to be when you're a total mess. That's just fan-fucking-tastic.

You try to compose yourself as you make your way closer to your apartment, and it isn't working too well. The man picks up your movement and gives you a gaze as he flicks the built-up ashes of the end of his cigarette.

You give a bit of a nod and mumble a quiet hello as you make your way closer to your apartment. You fumble through your purse, trying to find your key card for your door. Huffing in frustration, you realize that you most likely locked it in your apartment. 'This day just can't get any better,' you think to yourself.

You dig through your purse and grab your wallet, pulling out a dunking donuts gift card. You attempt to fiddle it in-between your door and the frame. You were struggling as you fiddled with the handle of the door. You are just about to try and kick down the door before a voice interrupts you.

"Aren't burglars supposed to be good at picking locks?"

You look over to see the man leaning back on the rail, amused at your feeble attempt to break into your own apartment.

Flustered, you stumble to find your words. "Ah well, you see... this is actually my apartment. I just locked my card inside. I was running late this morning and didn't have time for breakfast. And breakfast is the most important meal of the day, and it probably is a reason why I forgot my card. And my boss didn't make it any better by being such an asshole-" you glance at the man again and compose yourself. "I'm so sorry. You don't need to know all that. It's just been a long day," you sigh.

"Hey, I get it. It's been similar for me. I usually don't smoke, but it's been a bit of a rough day, so I thought I deserved a bit of a break," he signals to the cigarette intertwined between his fingers.

"I would offer you one, but I take you as the type who doesn't smoke."

"After the day I had, I am very tempted for any sort of relief" you sigh and drop your bag, joining him over by the railing.

Lazily putting the cigarette back in-between his lips, he extends his hand out to you. "Shouta Aizawa, I guess I'm your new neighbor."

You reciprocate and put your tiny hand in his "(F/N L/N, it's nice to meet you. Sorry, you had to see me when I'm such a mess."

"If this is you when you're a mess, I'd love to see how you are normally," he says.

Both you and Aizawa chit chat a bit before a gust of wind flows by you, making you shiver and cover your arms to receive it a bit. I guess he picks up on it because he offers you to come inside his apartment for a cup of tea.

"If that makes you uncomfortable, though, you are more than free to refuse. I won't take any offense," Aizawa says as he stubs out the remains of his cigarette into the ashtray he has sitting on a cardboard box.

"I'll take you up on your offer" you smile. "Just to let you know, though, I judge harshly when it comes to people's tea-making abilities."

"noted," he chuckles as he holds the door open for you with one arm while holding the box in the other.

You both chat for hours. Talking about anything and everything, you learned that he is a teacher at UA. Commending him at his accomplishment for having a job at such a prestigious school, but he doesn't seem to be interested in his accomplishment. Even with all of the talking, he seems like he isn't too interested in talking about his own life but more interested in finding more information about yours.

It's sweet, but you would like to know more about the man in front of you. You are surprised with how comfortable you are with him. He is a little intimidating. He's got this dark and broody sort of personality, and that's disregarding his looks. This man is the definition of sexy.

You are just admiring him and all of his details while he is sipping on the chamomile tea he made for you both. You notice the scar that's on his left cheekbone, and you're tempted to run your fingers across it. He also had some pretty prominent eye bags. You usually think eye bags are unattractive. That's ever since you developed some from working overtime at your job. Waking up and seeing the dark circles under your eye made you feel so insecure. Looking at Aizawa though, you can't help but find them beautiful. They add to his charm a bit, and you realize he most likely has them from putting in so much effort into his work. His dedication is more than admirable.

You take your time basking in him, thinking to yourself, "why is he so goddamn pretty?"

Only to realize that his expression changes, and you just said that out loud. Flustered, you try and explain yourself, "Sorry, I just- I didn't- God, this is embarrassing."

He grins. "Never would have thought I would be described as 'pretty. Usually, I get 'jaded' or 'dull.'"

"Really?" you say, shocked. "But you're so handsome?"

"With these dry eyes, thanks, but I don't need any pity compliments" you go to defend yourself but are interrupted by him.

"speaking of dry eyes," he rummages through his pockets. "Where did I put them?" he questions before picking up a box and setting it on the counter, rummaging through it.

"What are you looking for?" you question.

"Just eye drops, I get some pretty mean dry eye, so I usually have some on hand," he huffs.

"Well, I don't think you are going to find them in there," you nervously laugh.

"Why not? I'm pretty sure I put them in here."

"Do you... um usually put your eye drops in with uh- your butt plugs?" you question

"My what?" he stares incredulously, and you respond by pointing to the scribbled sharpie written on the side of the box. He flips the box around to see written in big bold letters' Aizawa's Butt Plugs FRAGILE'.

"Hizashi," he quietly sighs while pinching the bridge of his nose.

"Hey, it's totally okay. I don't kink shame here. I would just say its a little unsanitary to put your eye drops with-"

"I don't have but plugs," he quickly says. "I have never once owned but plugs; it's just my coworker is a piece of shit and doesn't know how to stay out of someone else's stuff."

"I like his humor. Seems like my kind of person," you chuckle.

"You would eat your words if you met him in person. He is kind of a loud person," he sighs as he continues to dig through the box. "Finally," he puffs as he pulls out a small little bottle. Unscrewing the top, he attempts to drop some in his eyes but misses.

Some mumbled swears later, and you offer, "Would you like some help?"

"only if you're comfortable though," you add on.

"Could you? I can usually get it first try since I do it so often" he hands you the tiny bottle. You look around and move to sit on the counter, waving him over to come in-between your legs. You cup his face as if it were a natural thing you would do on a day-to-day basis without even thinking. You have your thumb laying on his cheekbone, and you drag it over his scar, feeling some of the grooves and divots within it. He leans a bit into your hand as you caress the scar, but you realize you are getting a little carried away and continue. Dropping a couple of drops in each eye, he sighs in relief.

"Thanks," he says with a smile. You both look into each other's eyes before you cough and look over at the time to see it is already 1 am. He follows your gaze.

"Wow, have we really been talking that long?" you question. "I've probably more than overstayed my welcome" with a laugh, you hop off the counter and stand under his gaze. "Thank you so much for listening to me and being such a wonderful host. I should probably head back over though" you point to the direction of your apartment. "You might if I use your balcony to hop on over?" You ask.

"Sure," he breaks from his trance. Leading you to the balcony, you throw your bag over the railing to your side and follow in suit. He gives his hand and aids you over the railing to your side.

With a thankful smile, you give a quick thanks and goodnight. But before you go in, they capture your attention once again.

Rubbing his hand on the back of his neck, he says, "just so you know, you're welcome here anytime you get locked out again, or even if you don't get locked out."

You smile. "I'll take you up on that, but you might get tired of me pretty fast." You open the back door and make your way into your apartment, but before you close the door, you hear him say

"I doubt it."

[queenrisa14]

2020 Fanfic Year In Review

Wow. What. A. Year. 

I wanted to do this since I love seeing summaries of a year and what a year it’s been. Also this is super last minute lol

List of fics completed this year: 4

“We Pretended it Could Last Forever”

“Stay”

“Checkmate”

“Moonshine Chapter 5: Never Been Kissed”

I am fairly proud I even completed this many fics with the year I had lol I’m especially proud of finishing Checkmate!!

Number of words written: 49,219 words 

I am in so so so so much shock that I wrote this much this year. Definitely higher from last year and I’m so happy with the total. 

Your most popular fic written this year: 

“We Pretended it Could Last Forever” had the most reviews and Stay had the most favorites.

Of all the stories Checkmate was the most popular but I didn’t write it this year since it has been ongoing so I didn’t think it would count lol

Your personal favorite this year: 

I really liked “We Pretended it Could Last Forever”! It was a very stacked fic with lots of scenes but it was such a fun fic to write the fic for Antigone2!! 

I do go back on it and read some scenes that I liked. I also don’t get to do a lot of canon multi-chapter stuff so this was super challenging to write and I’ve always wanted to do an R-Break-up twist fic!

Your favorite scene:

My favorite scene has to be the memories coming back in “We Pretended it Could Last Forever”:

----

Once those red boots hit the pavement, the monster set its sights on Sailor Moon, shooting its slimy appendages left and right attempting to capture the superhero.

They fell into routine then, like it was old times and one of Beryl's minions instead. He distracted the enemy while she was the one to finish the thing off with a wave of her glowing, gold tiara until the ghastly thing was reduced to nothing but a flimsy card that released a black gas when it struck the ground. 

Their heavy, ragged breaths pierced the silence as they stood across from each other, their bodies recovering from their first fight in years. As his brain finally settled, he looked up to see her staring at him, mouth hanging open.

He dropped the transformation, coming back as Mamoru with his jeans and T-shirt.

A ripple happened in the air a second later and her body was bathed in bright pink lights, Usagi emerging seconds later with wet, disbelieving eyes and a flurry of emotions painted on her face.

She remembered, too. The same thing happened to her, the assault of memories of their lost year and lost lifetime together before having to transform. She knew all of it.

Every smile, the pain they both had felt, each moment they shared together that year was flooding her mind as much as it was in his. He could practically see the moments flashing through her eyes. His heart was beating faster and harder, waiting to walk up to her and finally act out that scene from his imagination.

------

I really liked how it turned out and it may seem more of a simple scene to point out, but I just really really liked it lol Again I don’t do serious canon A LOT so this was fun to dive into with the Tux/SM and Usagi/Mamoru dynamic and adding in the canon storylines. 

A fic or scene that challenged you:

Checkmate had challenged the fuck out of me. I struggled hard with finishing the last chapter and for once, I actually pushed back and made it through writing. 

I guess you can say that both me and Mamoru had breakthroughs with that end lol

A line of writing you’re proud of:

This actually goes to “Stay”:

-----

And she could finally say it.

"Can you please stay?"

"Yes," he answered, voice relieved, immediate, no hesitation. And he held her so tight and close, and it made her want to believe that he'd been waiting for the question, and had been hoping for the chance to hold her until morning ever since that first night.

------

So not just one line but I really like this little dialogue exchange at the end!! I felt like the emotion went through and this was the one story that I didn’t struggle so much for a proper ending lol I think I had the ending down more than the beginning when I first started writing it lol

BUT I guess a more fitting answer would also be the very last lines of the Stay as well:

The words burned in her throat like they always did.

Can you stay forever?

A comment that touched you:

This is always so hard to choose!

I get really touched when ANYONE reviews or comments or sends in an ask on here or even reblog or replies to my chapter saying they liked it.

I instead like to use this question as a way to shine on reviews that I can’t reply too but nevertheless mean so so so so much to me. That is guest reviews!

The last guest review here was recent and on Checkmate and I was really really really touched by it and Hannah if you see this, I so SOO so appreciate you!!! ♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️ 

Something that inspired your writing this year:

Dash and Lily on “Checkmate” actually!! Such a cute show and because it had the Checkmate vibes, the show is what filled me with inspiration again to finish off Checkmate. 

Your proudest accomplishment (that one scene, finally finishing that one fic, posting your first fic, etc.)

Finishing. “Checkmate.”

Biggest damn accomplishment and I’m so so so proud of finishing it. 

Also super proud of “Stay” since I was super nervous to get back into smut!!

Do you have any writing goals for the next year?

Obviously to write more but to also finish more fics! I have so many unfinished fic and I would love to see the endings of all of them. 

And also do some more angst and one-shots and just dive into more genres and canon storylines.

------

I looked back at my 2019 Year in Review and it kind of gave me that heavy feeling of how excited I was for this year and all the stuff I had planned in life and writing and it never really panned out. But I am extremely grateful and appreciate what I do have and what I got to have this year. 

Thank you to everyone on here and in the fandom for keeping this year somewhat sane for me ♥️♥️♥️♥️���️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️

I’m ready to take on 2021 lol 

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!! 🎊🎊🎉🎉🎉🎉🎊🎊🎊🎊🥳🥳🥳

[radiorenjun]

Lavender Antics.

→ Pairing: Han Jisung x Reader

→ Summary: Shooting in a drama with him was your absolute nightmare. Working with your enemy and pretending that you were love interests has been the most frustrating experience of your life. Though, after saying your farewells, the scent of lavender never leaves.

→ Genre:enemies to lovers au, idol au, romance, angst, slowburn.

→ Warnings: Very hurtful words. Antics. Mentions of insecurity. Alcohol, Swearing, Making out. Suggestive?

→ Word Count: 3.5k

→ Credits to: @c-sanshine for giving me reference photos

→ Chapter: 1, 2

As you ran your fingers through the soft petals of the lavender standing up right in the pot before you, you gazed up at the soft colours of the plant, admiring how calming they look basking underneathe the ray of sunshine.

"Hey!" a voice called out, tearing your gaze away from the plant towards the voice, you spotted a familiar male with a bright smile on his face. He showed that silly toothy smile of his, waving from the window of your bedroom, his other hand gripped the bike in his hands tightly to keep it steady.

It seems as if the world had stopped moving whenever the scent of lavender reaches your nose. "Ready for school?" the sound of his honey-smooth voice barely made through the glass. The scent of lavender never left you as you picked up your bag from your bag, slinging it over your shoulder with a soft grunt before walking out of your room.

You walked out of the house with a soft smile on your face at the sight of the boy, "you know, you didn't have to wait all day for me," you sighed, pushing his shoulder gently with your hand. "Oh I know. I'm just doing this so you could give me those delicious omelettes you usually prepare for me." he chuckled, earning a hard punch from you.

You ignored your friend's dramatic groans of pain as you went inside your garage where your dad was working to fix his car, grabbing your own bike and getting on with ease as you rode down the streets with nothing but the sound of the strong wind hitting your cheeks and the sound of the paddles of the bike.

"And cut! Take 10 people!" the director announced through his megaphone. You sighed, rubbing your eyes in exhaustion with your hands as you found the director's disappointed eyes glaring down at you from afar. You knew what was about to come with that look.

"Y/N, you forgot your line. Again." the director stated as he marched towards you. You took a deep breath, looking down at the floor in shame. "I know, I know. I'm sorry," you groaned, your voice evident of exhaustion. "It's just-" you tried to reason before the director cuts you off with a sigh, rubbing his temples with his fingers.

"Listen, take a break and go home. You're done for the day anyway, you look as if you had slept for decades. Maybe that'll help you get back to your senses," he suggests with a small smile. "But-" you tried to reason, gripping your script in your palms only to have it snatched away from your grip. "Na-uh, Y/n. Mr. Director is always right!" the boy from earlier, your best friend in the whole studio, Yang Jeongin, tutted with a shake of his head.

"Go rest or eat, you look like you're about to faint. We can't have you, the star of the show, become the next Sleeping Beauty, can we?" Jeongin joked. "Was that suppose to be a joke or an offer? You know very well I wouldn't miss the chance to just collapse on a bed and be willing to sleep 1000 years." you rolled your eyes sarcastically, erupting a laugh from the director.

"You should recite your lines with someone who's equal to your levels of acting, y/n. It might help you and them improve at acting," the director suggested, looking at your script once he struggled to get it out of Jeongin's grip.

"Oh yeah? And who would that be?" you asked, unbothered as you grabbed your cup of cold milk and brought it to your dry lips. "Oh, I don't know. Maybe Jisung?" he spoke with such calmness that you couldn't help but widen your eyes as you choke out the milk.

"What? Han Jisung?" you croaked in a hoarse voice. "You two are love interests in this drama, you might as well recite lines with each other to help each other improve and to get a better outcome for the drama" he said with a shrug. How could he suggest something so vile with a casual tone?

Jeongin couldnt contain his laughter as his gaze to your shocked, open-mouthed expression laced with 'are you serious?' all over it. He howled with laughter as the director looked at the both of you in confusion, not knowing what was the problem.

"What's wrong?" he asked, finally looking up from the script. "Sir, are you serious? That man hates me! I hate him! We both hate each other! I swear I'd rather go crying and bawling my eyes out in public!" you exclaimed. "That delirious donkey from Shrek couldn't even hold his hatred towards me to save his life!"

"I'm right here, L/N. I'm not deaf, I can hear your dying whale of a voice from Pluto." a familiar voice hissed behind you. You gasped silently in alarm, turning your body to come face to face with Han Jisung and all of his amazing glory.

"Jesus Christ, what are you, a sasaeng fan? Don't creep up on people like that, it's rude!" you exclaimed angrily as Jisung calmly sips his expresso, glaring down at you with pure boredom in his eyes. With a raise of his eyebrows, he let out a smirk, "Jesus Christ, what are you, a shallow snob? Don't talk trash bout people behind their backs like that, it's rude." he mocked, showing his pearly white teeth.

"See!" you turned towards the manager who was looking at you two with an unamused expression. "He hates me!" you exclaimed, "says the girl who talked trash about me first!" Jisung hissed in response.

Jeongin, during your bickering, was having the time of his life, laughing at all of the drama that was happening before him. "Oh my God, you two deserve an Oscar. You two act so lovey dovey when you're in that 'platonic state' on set while here in real life you're bickering like an old married couple, it's priceless!"

"Jeongin!" the two of your exclaimed angrily. The director gave out a soft sigh before walking away from the whole arguement, not wanting to cause some trouble since he had other errands to do.

"By the way. In a week, we're going to shoot somewhere in Tokyo for the camping scenes since you guys are gonna have more screen time there. I already informed your managers bout it, therefore you just need to go over the details of the scripts I gave you this morning." the director spoke in a serious tone as he walked away.

"What? For how long?!" Jisung whined loudly, making the director sigh and look back at the boy with an unamused expression. "It's only a month, then we'll be back to shoot here for the last few episodes," he replied shortly before bolting off somewhere to answer his ringing phone.

"You kidding me?" you mumbled to yourself, scratching your neck. "A whole month with you? I barely last 10 hours!" you groaned as Jisung rolled his eyes at you. "Shut up, y/n. I'm as thrilled as you are bout being stuck with your whiny ass for 30 days straight." he spat, his head turning to give you a death glare.

"Whatever, you ass. I'm going to my trailer and get my stuff so I can squeeze in some practice before Kiyeon locks me out from the dorm from the inside again." you huffed, grabbing your jacket which you placed hanging on the chair nearby.

"No one asked, y/n." Jisung replied, a small smile appearing on his face. You muttered incoherent swear words under your breath as you stretched to put on your jacket and head to the makeup room. "What did you say?" he asked with a smirk. You look back at him with half lidded tired eyes, giving him the middle finger before turning to walk away.

"Shut it, donkey"

Since you were a part of a girl group named Mythical Refrain in SM Entertainment, you still had to practice for your upcoming comeback for a few hours. God, can life get any tiring? You went out of the car after you parked it right outside of your dorm.

After a whole 6 hours of practice and 8 hours of filming, you felt like you could sleep through the whole decade. Your feet ached with every step you take, your muscles were sore from all the dancing and your voice was hoarse from the loud singing.

Your hand twisted the doorknob and your body came in contact with the fresh air conditioned room. As you entered, you slipped off your shoes and tossed your jacket to the sofa. You collapsed onto the soft cushions with a loud exhausted groan, ignoring the sound of your leader, Cheonsa, typing away on her laptop.

"Yeah, but you should get some rest if you ever want to perform again." your eyes glanced over to her bandaged ankle laying on a pillow on the floor. "Says the person who smells and looks like shit," she laughs, finally taking a break from the typing to look at your messy figure.

"Welcome back! How's your day?" she greeted, taking a sip of her coffee. "It's like 1 Am why are you drinking coffee?" you asked, looking up as you lay your chin on the pillow. "Wow. Not even a 'hello' or 'my day went absolutely shit and tiring'? Also, just because my ankle is injured, doesn't mean I get to slack off and not produce more music, Y/n." she chuckled, not tearing her gaze away from her laptop.

"Wouldn't want that boy to ruin your pretty mane, huh?" she teased, going back to her endless typing. "Shut up! You better go fucking rest or else I'll tell manager-nim that you stayed up writing and making songs again." you laughed, moving to the fridge to grab a cold bottle of water.

"You look as if you just dug yourself out of a graveyard. What did that director made you do?" she jokes. "It wasn't me, that terrible bastard couldn't stop bothering me I almost pulled my hair out" you complained, finally getting up to grab a towel.

"That cute rapper from Stray Kids? What was his name, again? Jinseul?" she asked with a comforting smile on her exhausted face. "It's Jisung and he's a fucking donkey. But, yeah, it is because of him." you grumbled, clutching the pillow in your fists at the thought of him. "He's really pretty though," Cheonsa chuckled.

"Excuse you, Ms. I-have-a-secret-boyfriend." I added in a sarcastic tone, making her laugh. "Oh hush, I'm 23. I wouldn't be dating someone younger than me, I feel old enough when fans call me noona during fansigns." she jokes, making you giggle at the memories you had. "But still, I look like shit when he ruffled my hair when I was on the way to the dance studio" you complained.

You entered your shared room to see your roommate, Haneul, playing on her nintendo switch. "Hey, you're back! How was the shoot?" she said, sticking her tongue out in concentration. "Stressful" you replied, turned on the shower and laying your hand under the running water to test the temperature.

"As your leader, the Mythical Refrain's most trusted, I'm doing what's best for the group and our fans. Therefore, you are not going to get rid of me that easily and go take a shower you piece of shit!" she exclaimed, throwing a pillow at you. You laughed as you ran for your life to miss that one single pillow that was thrown at you.

"You know. In a week, I'm going to be flying to Tokyo for a shoot. Wouldn't be back in a month, so don't miss me too much." you joke, grabbing the pillow on the floor and placing it back on the couch. "Trust me, we wouldn't even think about you for those 30 days of freedom. Have you told PD-nim yet?" she asked with a laugh.

"I don't think so. But the director and manager-nim said they'll take care of it. They'll announce that I'll be on hiatus during our promotions for the following month," you picked the dirt off of your nails as you spoke, hearing Cheonsa let out a hum in response.

"A hiatus announcement? Isn't that a bit too far? I mean, Park Jinyoung from Got7 and D.O from EXO didn't go on breaks when they shot their dramas." she asked with furrowed brows. "It's a pretty long drama. With three idols in the same drama!" you exclaimed, stretching your arms out as you collapsed once again into the cushions. "I see. Now go sleep and take a shower," Cheonsa nodded her head towards the direction of your room.

You huffed at her stern tone, pushing yourself up as you glared at your leader who was typing aggressively on the keyboard l with no intentions of stopping anytime soon. You sighed before walking away.

"Is it because of that boy?" she yelled through the sound of running water. You felt your blood boil at the sound of his name being mentioned, your mind replaying the many insults and arguements that happened today. All because of that donkey.

"That boy, or in my case, donkey, is the reason why Im losing hair!" you exclaimed in a dramatically angry tone. "No wonder, I thought you were just bleaching your hair too much that it burned off" she laughed. "Very funny, Haneul. Could you pass me my phone? It's in my dufflebag." you asked.

"Chill out, y/n. Boys are wierd anyways. But like, he's your sunbaenim. Shouldn't you at least, attempt to be nice?" she chuckled, walking into the bathroom to hand you your phone. "Im always nice to him. He started the arguements, anyways!" you shot back.

"You're no different, y/n. You called him a donkey less than 30 seconds ago." she chuckled, crossing her arms on her chest. "Well he is a donkey. Very accurate to the one in the Shrek movie!" you laughed.

"What? I'm just stating facts, who knows, it might actually happen in real life. Plus, I'm disgusted at their public display of affection. Ten is actually a good dude to hang out with," she grinned, leaning her head against her palm. "Hanuel. I have a toothbrush nearby and I will not hesitate to shove it down your throat! I shoved a paintbrush down someones mouth and I'm not afraid to do it again!" you threatened.

"This is ridiculous. Sooner or later you will have to do some lovey-dovey stuff with him on set, since you know-" she taunted with a smirk. "Don't even say it." you clenched your jaw at the thought. Sooner or later you'd have to kiss Han Jisung, you'd rather lick the bathroom floor.

Haneul couldn't stop staring at you with wiggling eyebrows and that annoying smirk across her face. "God, you're disgusted whenever Cheonsa brings her boyfriend in the dorm but you're, somehow, not disgusted bout shipping me with a guy I hate?" you complained.

Hanuel giggled, waving off your small threat with her hand. "Sure, go shower. You reek of boys," she chuckled with a raise of her eyebrow, exiting the bathroom. . "I'm going to go sleep. And I advise you to do the same after you shower, considering you have a photoshoot tomorrow." Her head popped out from the door way. "What photoshoot?" you asked with a slightly raised voice. "You know, that photoshoot for our next comeback concept?" she stated as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. "That's tomorrow? I thought I'd finally have half the day off" you groaned, running a hand through your hair in frustration.

You let out a loud scoff for her to hear before shutting the bathroom door and proceeded to take a cold shower.

"Bitch, you thought. It's only a couple of hours. Plus it's near the set so you could immediately head to there after you're done," she shrugged. "Oh my god," you groaned, rubbing your eyes. "How many episodes have you shot? The whole group wants to watch and 'clown you'. Cheonsa's words, not mine," she teased.

"Probably not much. Since I have to go to Tokyo next week!" you snapped, clenching your fists. "Woah, Tokyo? I wanna come!" Haneul exclaimed in astonishment. "You've been there, why are you acting as if you're a child locked up in some prison cell? We debuted a year ago and just finished our tour, for fucks sake!" you exclaimed.

"Why though?" she asked, ignoring your statements. You gave out a big exasperated sigh, "I have to shoot some scenes there for a month. So I won't be joining Mythical Refrain's promotions this month," you rubbed your face in frustration.

,"Oh. Well look on the bright side! At least you get to go sightseeing in Tokyo. The last time we were there, we barely had time to go around." Hanuel exclaimed with a bright smile. You grabbed the nearest toothbrush and raised it over your head angrily, causing Haneul to let out a small squeak and running to her bed.

Tomorrow was gonna be a heavy day.

"You're late, y/n." Jisung chuckled as you sat down on a chair in front of the mirror in the make up room. "I am aware of that, Jisung. It's not like I don't know how to tell time." you spat angrily as a make up artist approached you with brushes in hand.

"I know. Just thought that I'd remind you," he grinned. You rolled your eyes at him as the soft brush slide against the skin under your eye, covering up your eye bags with foundation. You grabbed your script and started reading, ignoring Jisung's eyes on you.

"What do you want now?" you sighed, looking away from your paper to give him a half lidded stare. "You look like shit, even with makeup on. No offense Eunbi, you're doing a great job" Jisung smiled at the makeup artist who just chuckled and continued on with her job.

"God, why didnt I just get my make up done in the trailer?" you mumbled to yourself, feeling soft pats on your shoulder given by your makeup artist. "Yeah, why didn't you? I lost my appetite just breathing the same air as you," Jisung mumbled loud enough for you to hear.

"Can it, you dick-" you growled, about to say some random comeback when the director came in with a wide smile. "Jisung! Y/N! Be out in 5, alright?" he exclaimed before shutting the door.

Your makeup artist bowed at you before exiting as well to catch up with the other makeup artists. "Great. See you there, y/n." Jisung laughed at your pouty expression after being cut off.

You groaned in annoyance as you watched his figure skipping out of the make up room, sticking your tongue out at him despite his back turned to you. You read through your script once again before getting up to walk through the door.

You jogged towards the set, highfiving your co-stars who gave you encouragement to do well on the next scenes, making you smile. Of course, that smile faltered when you remembered it was a scene you had to do with Jisung and you being friendly.

Your eye twitched at the thought as the staff gave you the school bag you were suppose to use for this scene since you played the roll of a young highschool girl. You gave Jeongin a thumbs up who responded with a salute as you walked up with a stem of lavender in hand.

You stood on the sidewalk as a few people came up to retouch your make up. You sighed, looking back at Jisung who was playing his phone to wait for his appearance on camera. Once you felt the soft feeling of sponges caressing your skin, you took a deep breath and clapped.

"You ready?" the director yelled through his speaker. "Hell yeah!" Jisung exclaimed from afar, tucking his phone into his pocket as he waved his hand with a thumbs up. "Let's get it! " you clapped enthusiastically before getting into position.

"Lights."

You see the lights being adjusted to get a better lighting of your surroundings to give it an aesthetic vibe. You cracked your knuckles and took deep breathes, reciting your lines to yourself in your head.

"Camera." You heard the sounds of camera being moved to your position, carefully recording your movements, your mistakes, and your acting. You gave a little smile at the staff who gave you a thumbs up.

"And action!"

[yootaesowlwrites]

Requested by;  @sunsetonmybreath​

Request; part two?????? i love danny sm

Note; part 2 for C38 & A20

A/N: I am so sorry that you’ve had to wait so long for this, you requested this months ago, and I said you’d have to wait until June, and June’s almost over, and I’m so sorry, but I struggled with a plot for it, but I’ve finally found one, I’ve finally written it, even if it took me months, also, I’ve added some prompts in this, hope you don’t mind.

Prompts Used: A91- “I Think I’m In one With You And I Don’t Know What To Do.” A185- “You Look… Wow, I Can’t Even Describe It. Wait, Did I Just Say That Out Loud?” A111- “You Don’t Know Half Of The Things You Do To Me.” A100- “You Keep Saying That We’re Friends But You Look At Me For A Moment Too Long For That To Be True.” A37- “I’m Going To Kiss You Now.” A36- “Is That My Shirt?” 

Warnings: Female Sanitary Products mentioned.

Word Count: 1K

PART 1 HERE.

【 • Primary Masterlist • Drivers Masterlist • Daniel Ricciardo Masterlist • Fan Fiction Masterlist • 】

【 • Prompt List • Smut Prompt List • Scenario Prompt List • Alternate Universe Prompt List • 】

【 • List Of Characters & Drivers I Write For • Rules & Request • 】

Weeks had passed since (Y/n)\s apartment was damaged, constructions had slowly started and she was informed that it would take months before it would be repaired,  (Y/n), however, was enjoying her time with Daniel, it was the first time that the two of them actually spent time with each other and really gotten to know each other, the jokes he always told made her laugh, she should be miserable about her apartment, but she wasn’t, and she had no idea if it was because she started liking Daniel, the way his eyes would light up when he spoke about his work, or the way his nose would crinkle when he laughed loudly, (Y/n) would have never noticed those things if she hadn’t moved in with him, As a month passed she slowly fell in love with him, his flaws and the little thing’s nobody noticed about him.

“Is that my shirt?” Daniel asks as (Y/n) steps out from the bathroom, there was a downside, he only had one bathroom and they had to share, meaning she had no idea where she should hide her sanitary products, (Y/n) looks down at the shirt loosely hanging from her shoulders, her hand's fumble with the hem.

“Uh, it is, I hope you don’t mind.” (Y/n) says, she looks back up at him, the rays of the sun hitting against her skin making it appear that she was glowing. “I uh forgot to wash my shirts.”

“No, no, I don’t mind, it’s just uh, you look… wow, I can’t even describe it.” Daniel says, (Y/n)’s eyes widen in shock as her lips part. “Wait, did I just say that out loud?” (Y/n) slowly nods her head, she had no idea how to respond, she wanted to, but she couldn’t find the words.

“I um, yeah.” (Y/n) whispers.

“I, uh, um, I don’t… you.” Daniel struggled to find the words, he had been keeping it to himself, but he had grown to like (Y/n), when he invited her to stay at his apartment whilst hers was getting repaired, he had never thought that he would love having her around. “I uh, I might as well confess.” (Y/n) could feel her heart hammering against her chest, she swallows anxiously. “I think I’m in love with you and I don’t know what to do, but what I do know is that I don’t want you to move out when your apartment gets fixed.” The outside world disappeared for a moment, (Y/n) replayed his words in her mind, hoping to heaven and hell that she didn’t just imagine it.

“I um, you think?” (Y/n) asks, her voice soft and uneasy, a lump had formed in her throat. “You uh think you love me?”

“Scratch that, I’m sure that I’m in love with you,” Daniel says. “And if you don’t feel the same way, that’s fine, but you deserve to know.” (Y/n) slowly nods her head, he felt the same way about her. “I realize we really just gotten to know each other and became friends, bu-“

“You keep saying that we’re friends.” (Y/n) cuts him off, he tilts his head in confusion, she clears her throat before continuing. “But you look at me for a moment too long for that to be true.” She wanted to facepalm herself, he was professing his love, and she decided to point out how she had noticed how he stared at her when they watched a movie, or when she would make them lunch or dinner.

“I uh, didn’t think you’d notice,” Daniel says, a soft smile appeared on (Y/n)’s lips.

“You’re horrible at hiding it, you stand out too much, your smile stands out a lot.” (Y/n) says. “Of course I noticed.” She could see the hurt flash in his eyes. “No, no, I didn’t, I don’t mean it in a rude way, I love your smile.” Daniel smiles at her, his teeth on display as his smile widens. “Yes, that exact smile, but when I catch you staring at me, it’s a softer one, and sometimes I just…” She trails off unsure if she should tell him.

“You just what?” Daniel asks as he walks towards her, curious about what she was going to say. “I can handle it, come on tell me, you just what?” Daniel stopped in front of her, she looks up at him as she begins playing with the hem of the shirt she wore.

“I just wish you’d do something, like pull e into your arms, kiss me, or hold my hand.” (Y/n) says. “I mean, you don’t know half of the things you do to me.”

“Oh, so you do feel the same way about me, huh?” Daniel asks, raising an eyebrow, (Y/n) chuckles at how silly he looked.

“Yes, you goofball.” (Y/n) says. “And I was wondering if you needed a roommate?” Daniel laughs, his nose crinkling as he did.

“Not really, but I think I can make an acceptation for you,” Daniel says, (Y/n) smiles up at him, wishing that she had befriended him when she had moved into the building. “When will you be moving in?” They move closer to each other, Daniel placed his hands on her hips.

“As soon as possible.” (Y/n) whispers, they slightly lean closer to each other.

“Then I’ll make some space in my closet for your stuff,” Daniel whispers. “And one more thing.”

“Mhm?” (Y/n) hums in response.

“You can put your pads and tampons underneath the sink, you don’t have to hide them from me,” Daniel says, (Y/n) lowers her head and leans her forehead against his chest as her cheeks heat up from embarrassment.

“Daniel.” (Y/n) whines against his chest, he begins laughing as he wraps his arms around her.

“It’s nothing to be embarrassed about,” Daniel says, she could hear the smile in his voice. “You don’t have to hide anything from me, I don’t hide anything from you.” She looks up at him. “I’m going to kiss you now.”

“Please do, I don’t want to talk about my stuff anymore.”

Daniel Ricciardo Taglist:

@hannahlfleming​ //

[la-luna-es-hermosa]

EXO Reaction to a Filipino Idol

Note: Bruh I think I have overdone this reaction. This reaction is made from a request by an anon! I am so excited to finally receive an ask! But yes I did make this reaction extra special because of my hiatus. Sorry for not being active anymore because I have been addicted to osu and other rhythm games (Arcaea and Superstar SM). I have also been in a new fandom (in my profile picture) I know I gotta stay loyal for my boy Jongin but I just can’t. For this blog, I will still accept requests, still active, but I will be more active in @kuwurapikaaa​ ! If you want hunter x hunter, the arcana, jjba and A3! content, check that blog up too! I am finishing drafts there as well - MeiQI

Junmyeon

You guys met at one of the designer parties he attends to. Despite being in the same industry, you guys haven’t really faced each other. He was probably too busy tending to his members.

In that moment, he finally had enough courage or time to actually talk to you. He really liked how you guys shared many struggles, from trainee days and even today. “I really understood your struggles back then. Adjusting to a new country and lifestyle is really hard.” He said to you as he patted your shoulders.

Junmyeon would give out flowers every promotion you had. Even if your group didn’t win, you always get a bouquet from him. Your members started assuming that he has a liking on you.

Your family started to notice his actions as well. “Are you sure that Junmyeon isn’t courting you?” Your concerned father asked. He loves his unica hija (lit. unique daughter, in context: only daughter) too much to just let her go with a mere guy. He has to know more about Junmyeon before letting his child date him.

It seemed like everyone around you are just beating around the bush because of his actions around you. But all that was worth it as he went to your parents and asked them if he can court you. “Mr. and Mrs. (Surname), I like your daughter (Name). Can I court her?” He asked them. - The parents did not even question it since Suho is such a sweetheart

Junmyeon also started exploring more about the Philippines, knowing that his beautiful girlfriend is from the country. He would firstly look up at pieces of art made by Filipino artists (with the likes of Fernando Amorsolo and Juan Luna), it would be a bonus if you’re interested in art as well. Most of your conversations would end up being about you guy’s cultures and how the painters showed the message they want to put out there.

He would also end up being really curious about the language as well. I can see him trying to learning the language just for you. “Sobrang mahal kita, ikaw ang aking mundo” He says with a cute bashful smile. It still sounded different because of his Korean accent. You found it quite endearing that he will go through all this lengths to impress you and show how much he loves you.

Minseok

For Xiumin... hmm... it’s hard because I can’t really picture Xiumin with a Filipino girl or a foreigner in general. It’s not that he doesn’t like Foreigners, but I am very unsure about it. Like Kyungsoo, he is really into girls that are more traditional.

Like everyone else, Minseok would be really interested in your culture. The delicious food, the language you spoke. He would always listen to the way your voice shifted when you speak to him and to your parents. “Ma okay lang ako... nag-iingat naman po kami ni Minseok.” You spoke to your worried mother over the phone.

Although I can see him trying to actually learn Tagalog just for you. He would learn it in secret until he was fluent enough to tell you that “(Y/N) ikaw lamang ang aking mamahalin” and write you a whole essay on why he loves you just in Tagalog.

In music shows, like Junmyeon, he will send you lots of flowers because that is exactly where you guys met at. Every time your group had a comeback that was around the same time as his, he will always look at you and got the courage to sneak in his phone number.

Minseok texts you a lot, telling you if you got his flowers or if your parents approved of him. - Of course your parents approved of him, even saying that you grew up too fast as you now have a boyfriend. 

You guys haven’t had the time to be together due to his military enlistement, but as soon as he can hold his phone again, you were the one of the first people he messaged. “Sorry I haven’t talked to you” He said.

But out of all the EXO members, he gave you the sweetest confession at a park at night. “I want to say that I enjoy your company and I am thinking about my future with you.” He said to you as his hands cupped your face.

Yixing

I remember the time he said PhiliPENIS, this man right here lol. Anyway, jokes aside I think Yixing would be really interested in your culture. It is a bonus point that both of you are foreigners and are in the same industry. Like Suho, Yixing met you in one of those luxury parties hosted by fashion labels.

You immediately caught his eyes, the look you were wearing really suited you. The colors were beautiful, just like you. When the cameras aren’t rolling, this is where he would move. He would DM you via instagram and that is where you guys will start to talk. It went from simple “how are you?”, to the more complicated topics. You were his home, the place he would go to if he’s stress.

It would definitely be a bonus if you like doing music. You would be singing many of his demos so that he can really see if he did a great job. His source of inspiration is you as he stays late at night to compose something for him.

Even if you’re an idol, your relationship would still be long distance as he is in China and you’re in Korea, promoting with your group. (With some sneaky flights to China), “I miss you Yixing...” You smiled at him as you looked at the screen, Yixing is working hard in the studio.

“I miss you too... I wish I can hug you.” He said to you, his eyes somber as he looked at the screen of his phone, seated at his studio, working on a new song. Every time you guys kissed, hugged or touched each other, it felt more electrifying as you have never met him often.

Since he had always been a dancer, I can see him trying to learn Cariñosa (I had a dream like this aaaa), he would be really curious at the many dances the Philippines offered.

(Note: I have to cut the reaction for Yixing because I might get political and I don’t wanna get in jail anytime soon lol)

Baekhyun

I feel Baekhyun would be a bit more safer with a Filipino girl (given what happened to his ex-girlfriend). I can see him being with one as he was the one who came up with the Phixo name in the first place.

He would protect you so much to the point that he will not reveal you guys are together. With what happened to Taeyeon and to think that you are a Filipino idol, which means you are certainly the pride of your country. He would rather reveal you at the right time. (When will that be at this rate)

You met him at a music show while promoting his solo stuff. He really enjoyed your group’s performance as well. You became immediately his favorite member for your talent and eye-catching looks. He knew you already since debut and thought you were really pretty, but it took to another level when he saw you personally.

His jaw dropped at your looks, you were unique unlike any other idols. With his social skills, he didn’t hesitate to talk to you backstage and that is where you guys really took off.

I can see you and him are variety idols. - Reminds me of Heechul and Momo. You guys would always come up with the stupidest jokes. Bonus points if you are a gamer as well. You guys would always fight at the latest RPG games out there. “I beat your ass!” You said to him while laughing at his loss in the game.

Baekhyun would also sing songs for you (like Kyungsoo and Chanyeol). He would sing all your favorite songs in Tagalog just for you!!!! I am fangirling in the inside as I imagine Baekhyun singing songs to make you sleep aaaa He would also try to explore your culture as he would try out your favorite food as well. 

“Wow this thing tastes delicious!” Baekhyun remarked as he poured the soup over the rice. A smile formed in your face as he eagerly ate the food. You looked at him, lovingly observing him. You were glad he really enjoyed the food you made.

In later years, when he finally think that you will be the one that he truly wants to be with forever, he will choose to settle in the Philippines as the media and paparazzi there is not as crazy as the ones in Korea.

Chanyeol

For Chanyeol, I think you guys met through MC-ing, You guys were partnered up to MC a music show. Since your cute bickering in the music show aired on TV, your fans started shipping the two of you. It ended up with you guys talking more to each other backstage. Recommending songs and telling your problems to each other were the most topics of you guys’ conversations.

He ends up giving his number as you guys message each other more and more often. He was the first one to fall for you. Falling for the first time your eyes laid on his. You fell for him in no time, enjoying his company.

Because of you, he would listen to Filipino music. Particularly, I can see Chanyeol liking old Filipino bands such as Silent Sanctuary, Eraserheads, Parokya Ni Edgar, and Orange & Lemons. He would always sing their songs to you every time you guys meet. You guys would even have Karaoke nights where you just sing songs. “I heard Filipinos are good singers.” He told you as he handed out the mic.

You laughed as you started singing. - Obviously you would be a good singer as you debuted in an idol group and is a known kontesera (a woman who participated in many singing contests). He was charmed by how captivating your voice was.

You became the topic of many songs by Chanyeol. Your eyes, your loving words, your everything. - He loved every single part of it. Hell he can even dedicate a whole album just for how much he loves you and how you are an important part of his life.

You went to the Philippines to have your vacation. As you were enjoying your family’s company, suddenly you heard a familiar voice. You stood up from your couch and looked down at the window. “(Name)! This one’s for you!” Your eyes widened as you saw that it was Chanyeol.

Chanyeol started strumming his guitar. The view looked amazing, the stars twinkled, he looked ethereal as he looked up to meet your eyes.Your parents peeked with you as their heard his voice. “Uso pa ba ang harana?” He started singing the song with his low voice. He was singing Harana by Parokya Ni Edgar. 

Kyungsoo

People would be rather shocked as Kyungsoo is the type of guy to date a traditional Korean girl. But I can also see him truly appreciating a Filipina girl. He firstly found you quite weird because he

It was you who made the first move. Your group is promoting your comeback at the same time EXO was. You hesitantly sneaked your phone number into his sandwich. You watched him open it, as you thought he was going to throw the paper away, he didn’t. He kept it in his pocket and went along.

With his sweet voice, like Chanyeol, he always sang many Tagalog songs with you. (I remember the time when they sang ‘Hawak Kamay’ in the dream concert). Your parents would’ve approved of him quite fast, being such a good, well mannered man. He is the dream son-in-law for every parent 

Kyungsoo had always been so protective of you because of you being Filipino, you had a lot of supporters since rookie days. Your kababayan would be really dismayed if there was bad news about you. He wouldn’t like you to lose your career. (Even more if you’re supporting your family)

“After boiling the tamarind, what comes next?” Kyungsoo asked you as he was chopping the spareribs in the battered cutting board. He always does this. He makes random food from your childhood. One day it was adobo, the other day it was caldereta, now it’s sinigang na baboy.

You smiled at him as you spoke a reply, “The ribs.” You clung to him as you wrapped your hands underneath his apron. Wrapping him in a tight embrace.

Jongin

In the Filipino side of the fandom, affectionately called “Phixos” by Baekhyun, Jongin has been called a Filipino. It was because of his looks (his charming eyes, his tanned skin) and his frequent visits to Cebu. Some fans even jokingly say that Jongin would settle with a Filipino girl or along those lines.

It wouldn’t be a shock for the Filipino fandom that Jongin chose a Filipino girl. It would be something that they would even celebrate, the fact that Jongin dated a kababayan. (Fellow Filipino)

You guys met in a photoshoot of a local magazine. He was impressed with your modeling skills, despite you being a rookie in it. Of course, you were intimidated with him as he is the Gucci ambassador. Right after the rather sexy photoshoot, you guys gave each other numbers. You guys started DM-ing each other via Instagram.

Jongin would be just as interested in learning Tagalog than English. In your very long conversations, he would always talk to you in Taglish (Tagalog and English) so that you are more comfortable talking to him. Rather than him talking in long paragraphs of Korean text. He finds it amazing that you speak more than two languages.

Your leader would joke about you being awake at ungodly hours listening to Jongin’s honey voice as he tries to sing when you can’t sleep. Or sometimes it would be his heavily accented English or Filipino. You wouldn’t say anything, but everyone already knows. As soon as your magazine gets through publication, everyone would start shipping you guys together. Searching the deepest depths of the internet for ship-able moments for the two of you.

“I’ve been to Cebu two times last year.” He said to you, smiling as he showed some polaroids from his Cebu trip. Your handsome boyfriend was seated on the couch. You were just chilling in your own apartment.

“You’ve been to Cebu two times in one year?! I haven’t even been to that place ever!” Your eyes were wide with shock, you almost dropped the popcorn you were munching on. How can someone travel twice to a foreign country? - You thought to yourself.

Sehun

It was love at first sight for the maknae. As soon as he saw you passing by on a music show, he cannot take his eyes off you, following all of your available SNS. His eyes were glued at you as he sneaked his number on an Inkigayo sandwich. He was also your secret fanboy, cheering and supporting you while you perform. Sehun always congratulates you on every comeback/release, messaging you on Kakaotalk on how are you doing that time or saying that he’s happy for you.

As soon as you received his number, you cannot imagine that out of all people, it was Sehun from EXO who gave you his phone number. It was like a dream come true. After emptying out your schedule, you immediately called Sehun. - From there, you guys started talking and having feelings developed.

He started being more curious about Filipino culture all because of you. He started researching it in his free time. - I can see Sehun date a foreigner, so I think the culture is not really a hurdle for him. 

Surprisingly, you were the one who made the first move. Not Sehun. You confessed to him very confidently. But since the cultural difference, he hasn’t met your parents. As soon as your schedules were empty, you guys went to the Philippines to find your parents and introduce him to them.

Sehun was standing nervously in front of your house’s gate. It was his first time visiting your family. He was shaking to the point that he cannot even move. You looked at him in the eye and asked him, “Is anything wrong?” you asked as you pat his shoulders, calming him down.

“No, nothing.” He said as he shook his head as he held the bouquet tightly in his hands. Then you saw your mother that opened the gate. - They were more than glad that they get to meet your precious Sehun.

“Why didn’t you tell me that your boyfriend is this gwapo?” Your mom asked you as you laughed. Then, you entered the house with huge smiles on your faces.

[someonexsomeone]

To My Best Friend

Title: To My Best Friend

Author: SomeonexSomeone

Word Count: 1609

AU: BestFriend!Johnny

Summary: It’s soft BestFriend!Johnny hours, where you both have to learn that separation is a part of growing up.

Authors Note: Wow! Another story without pairing. This was sparked from my roommate and I realizing one day we will have to live away from each other, which is absolutely heartbreaking. Tweaked a little to fit Johnny, but the feelings are still there. As always, comments and criticism are welcome!

When they first left each other after high school, they made a mutual promise to facetime once a week. Usually, this involved watching movies or tv together, but sometimes it would just be quiet - only scratching pens or the keys clicking away to fill the void of conversation. It was just as good as being in the same room, right? But Johnny’s dream took him to Korea, working alongside other students as they all worked towards debuting into the music world. 

That day...it was impossible not to think about it fondly. The day that Johnny left for Korea was monumental for two reasons. One, Johnny Suh was accepted into his dream company and had a high likelihood of debuting with major success. And two, Johnny Suh was a sneaky genius. 

"There's a flight that leaves in two hours to New York City," Johnny offhandedly mentioned as the two of you stood in front of the departures. Johnny was finally heading off to Korea of officially start major training, and as his best friend, you would be accompanying him up until the absolute last minute. How could you not? Your best friend in the whole world was leaving for a completely different country for who knows how long. There was no way you weren’t going to at least party it up a little with him before he was gone forever (and by ‘party it up’ it meant sightseeing and trying not to cry about his leaving). So here you now stood, feet planted firmly in front of the ‘Departing’ board, trying with minimal luck to find your gate. You hummed at his statement, but made no further comment, still searching the board. "You should take it." That made you look up at him instantly.

"What?” 

"I said, you should take it. The plane. To New York City." Johnny's voice was still unreadable. You scrunched your nose at his tone.

"Why on earth would I get on a plane to New York?"

"Because it's the best location for you to go." You finally turned your body fully to your best friend, but Johnny continued to stare straight forward.

 "Johnny, we're supposed to be dropping you off at SM, not taking a surprise detour to New York." Johnny signed heavily, his hands coming up to rest gently on your shoulders.

"You're my best friend in the whole world, and I hope you know I love you more than anything. But your ass is getting on that plane." You opened your mouth in protest, but all it took was a shake of Johnny's head to get you to shut up. "The lease on your parent's apartment is up at the end of this month, which, may I remind you, is in 8 days. I know they would love for you to continue to stay there, but I know you hate how closely they watch you. And I know you haven't been able to find another place - don't say anything, I'm still talking - despite your lame attempts to hide it. New York has everything you'd need, which includes tons of opportunities just waiting for you. You need to take that chance and go for it. You'll regret it your whole life if you don't."

Would you regret it? 

Yes, it was true that you hadn't been able to find another place to live, but nothing you had looked at felt right. It just felt wrong to stay in Chicago without Johnny. And yeah, you were slacking on school. It had been months since college started but you had put off applying for so long, too wrapped up in lame excuses - I'm tired, I have work, I can't do it right now. And after your horrible manager fired you for a mistake you were wrongfully blamed for, you hadn’t been doing much. Maybe jumping straight in would be the best option. You would have no excuse to slack off...

"But how would I even live there? I don't have enough money to live in New York," you finally said. Johnny gave you a sly smile.

"I heard there's a lady who owns a building in Queens who is renting to poor college students. Apparently, she has a real soft spot for struggling kids. Something about being a good person or whatever.” Johnny reached up and ruffled your hair playfully. “And, you know, since I already did all this research you should also know that your plane ticket can be exchanged for another flight.” Softly, he added, “If you wanted to, that is."

"Johnny, this is crazy!” You couldn’t help it. Your voice came out shrill, but the surprise was too much to keep your voice calm. It echoed off the walls of the large room, so in a quieter voice, you continued, “You want me to completely drop my life just like that? What about the rest of my stuff?"

"Come on, the flight is in two hours. Plenty of time to get back to the apartment and pack. I know for a fact that all of the stuff you really care about can fit into a suitcase."

You were spellbound. Your friend - your beautiful, kind-hearted, absolutely bat-shit crazy best friend - had gone out of his way in the most stressful time in his life to make sure that his best friend was going to be okay. The tears couldn't be stopped as they started to roll down your cheeks - huge, wet globs that turned black from your cheap mascara and formed a Y shape around your quivering lips. You couldn't help it. You threw your arms around Johnny, sobbing loudly in the middle of the airport for all to see. Onlookers starred as Johnny smiled and patted you gently on the back, stroking your hair.

You did end up taking that plane to New York. You had to practically beg to live in the house Johnny recommended, and spent your first day in New York sending out as many resumes as you could. Full-time, part-time, internships - whatever you could find, you sent. Worked as a waitress at a horrible nightclub near the apartment for a month. Lived like you were in college, with no solid furniture or regular eating habits. Even lived without heat for a while just to keep the WIFI running. But, you were happy.

Across the world, Johnny was thriving in his new location. You called as much as you could, which was a lot more than Johnny was available. Still, just the happy melody of his tone was enough to keep you relatively worry-free. Johnny told you stories of the amazing people he’d met already, a boy named Sehun was particularly fun to be around, apparently, and he made you laugh with all the crazy things he somehow managed to get up to. 

Months continued on and you got an internship position at a company for something you were really interested in. Unpaid, for the first six months, but better than nothing. You still worked as a waitress, thankfully at a nice restaurant that didn’t have men leering at you the whole time, waiting to apply for a full-time position. But, even better, the college in New York accepted your application, a hefty scholarship taking a weight off your shoulders and the answer much too easy. You remember the smile on Johnny’s face, megawatt despite the dark circles under his eyes, and congratulated you a thousand times over. A few weeks later, a package full of Korean treats arrived in the mail, a beautiful handwritten card with almost completely illegible handwriting attached along with it that only read ‘love you bitch’. You still had it to this day, hung up on the wall among your other photos.

And when you finally earned enough money, Johnny flew all the way from Korea during his break to help you apartment hunt. It was, of course, exactly like the movies portrayed with blue skies, mile-high skyscrapers, and bustling streets - except every apartment was dingy and small and could barely contain a person, let alone a bed. But you still laughed along with the realtors, both desperate and otherwise (because let’s be honest - most people would live in a roach-infested apartment just to stay in New York), ate cheap hot dogs in between showings, and even managed to drive down to Chicago so Johnny could see his family (which was practically your family too). 

And, for the first time since high school, you and Johnny were able to eat together, hug each other, and hang out day and night in person, not keeping your relationship of fast facetime calls with blurry images and indistinguishable audio. You realized just how much you missed Johnny Suh, just how much your life revolved around your best friend, and how much of a comfort Johnny was for you. When no one else was there, Johnny always was, ready to hold your hand our of the darkness.

In that quiet, black night, you rolled over and hugged Johnny close, just one more time. In the morning, Johnny Suh and you would once again be across the world from one another. In the morning, Johnny Suh would be boarding his plane back to Korea and you would be signing a form to stay permanently in New York, and your lives will once again be separated. But, that’s all for the morning. For now, you will hold Johnny close, listening to his deep breath as he finally gets a good night's sleep, feel as his soft hair glides through his fingers, smile as he wraps his arms just as tightly around you, and treasure the moments you still have left.

Masterlist

[appleflavoredkitkats]

sweeney todd manila review

okay, just a heads up, i don’t know much about sweeney todd outside of this production and of what little bits i’ve heard of the other productions, so this won’t be the most professional review. i watched the show on the twentieth of october and i believe the whole cast was there.

btw, this is gonna be really messy bc i still have lots of stuff to do so i’m speed typing this review out KDDLJF.

(hello, @thegirlisuedtobe, this is for you! sorry if this is very late, i was really busy!)

- the set is phenomenal. before the show started, there was the sound of rain while smoke scattered across the stage. it really gave off a very eerie vibe to the show, even if it hasn’t started, and i give huge props to the set designers for setting the tone of the musical!

- here’s what amazed me the most about the set-- FLOATING CARS. there were cars hanging up on strings and just... wow. absolutely breathtaking. there was also an upperstage that was build particularly for this musical which was also well done as well. on stage left, there was this platform in particular that intrigued me because it was slanted and only had a railing that could possibly reach below your thigh. it was risky, i might say, and because of that, huge appreciation to the cast because they were able to maneuver themselves on that platform without slipping or injuring themselves.

- another interesting prop which i’m sure many of you have seen in promos was the red car that both mrs lovett and sweeney todd used. in my opinion, at first glance, the car looked cool, but there were some pros and cons.

- pros of the car: the car gave some kind of edginess to the musical. the main characters rode the car into the stage as their introduction and it really left a good impact! additionally, i loved the way how they moved the car around. all transitions were so smooth and commendable and i praise the designer who thought of all of these up.

- cons of the car: it was awkward when the setting was at the bakery of mrs lovett. the car represented the second floor of the building and the chair of sweeney’s barbershop merely rested on top of the car. it was... kinda confusing at first, especially when it is really up to the audience on how they want to interpret the murders that occurred on the car (more on that later). additionally, the car served as a weird divider to the shop, the bakehouse, and the barbershop, and honestly, they should’ve placed the barbershop on the upperstage instead of on top of the car. (gurl, when i say i was confused, i say i was confused.)

- the keep your cellphone message was really funny to me but... kinda long? like it was so unnecessarily long that i was confused whether the show started or not. i also thought they were checking the set since there was many props littered around. but when they eventually get to the point of things, it was really, really funny, so i commend them for adding this small comedic scene just for audience members to stop taking photos. 

- the singing of the cast was phenomenal! these people are just... so great, and it was definitely the highlight of the show. 

- now... here’s where i get a little bit iffy-- the costumes. i don’t really know what to say because the costumes seem... laughable. but not in a good way. it seems like they wanted to modernize the costumes which is understandable but at some cases, it kinda fails? 

- pros of costume: mrs lovett and pirelli really have the costumes which i loved. lea salonga did not look like herself but my god, did her costume stand out from the rest. and pirelli, on the other hand, had a cape that wooshed around a lot alongside a skirt, and boio, did nyoy volante nail this costume well. the modernizing costume thing didn’t really work with the others besides these two. other modernized costumes that look passable were tobias’ costume and some of the ensemble. (also, jonas fogg wore a denim jacket with a junji ito screencap on the back of it? uh, okay, i love junji ito but why is his manga featured here...)

- cons of costume: oh boy. sweeney todd’s costume was... eh. jeans, really? out of everything they could’ve given to sweeney fucking todd, they gave him a polo under a denim jacket under a blazer and jeans? then there’s the mess that is johanna’s costume design. girl, the designer probably went to an sm sale and decided to just shove anything they found in the department store into their cart. johanna’s dress was. eh. her wig? eh. the costumes didn’t snatch my wig but i’ll let them snatch my wig just so that they can replace whatever the heck johanna has on her head. additionally, not all costumes were modernized... which is like... what? the ensemble who had victorian era-esque costumes looked fine! they even could’ve given sweeney todd one of their costumes because it looked much better than the denim outfit they gave sweeney. it’s just quite... odd to see a mix of modernized costumes and oldstyle costumes mix all together because they lowkey clash with one another.

- okay, let’s move on to the actors themselves. let’s start of with lea salonga-- oh my god, she is a legend. she easily adapted into being mrs lovett and that is so commendable especially when she isn’t used to playing an insane role like that. her mrs lovett had consistent, chaotic energy which i admired and she really was the one to eye whenever you see her in a scene.

- jett pangan was great but he isn’t as consistent as lea when he portrayed his character. sweeney todd was insane, he is angery, he is chaotic but jett pangan portrayed him as stoic and silent in some parts. i really enjoyed his more insane side during little priest but i wished he kept it throughout the whole performance. what i did like about him is his voice is just so, so great. his vibratos were so good y’all, his singing in general makes up for everything. additionally, when sweeney gets emotional, he did a really good job portraying a sadder and more depressed kind of sweeney, almost like he was having some existential crisis on stage. (he really looked like he was regretting life choices during by the sea and the ending, it was actually kind of amusing).

- now, luigi quesada, an underrated actor from this production. god... he was just so consistent and energetic and an absolutely great actor. he really portrayed a pure soft boi through tobias and when he started to become insane, he portrayed that shift of character so fucking well. the shift of character was my absolute favorite thing because, in my opinion, it is the scariest thing that’s happened in sweeney todd. tobias was a pure, innocent child who wanted nothing more but to have a smol job and serve others nicely and then, bam, when he saw the corpses, something snapped in his head and it was so horrific to witness his change. additionally, luigi had such a cheerful singing voice which embodied the character well and accustomed to both the innocent and insane side of tobias.

- nyoy volante was another great treasure in this. he wasn’t as seen since his character died midway through but his stage presence is so great. he was so flamboyant while also being very comedic, using his costume to emphasize the comedy. also, he didn’t die immediately when he got attacked by sweeney, and he did portray the struggling pirelli so, so well. 

- gerald santos was... okay. he has a great singing voice, they all do, so i tend to judge how good they are based from their acting. gerald was really good at portraying a panicky anthony who was desperate for johanna. his character was really consistent and i like that! my main issue with gerald is at some times, his diction isn’t too great. i know that some filipinos (even me) would struggle pronouncing words in english, but if you’re an actor who’s worked on many musicals in english, i expect a lot from you. i think he had a really thick filipino/tagalog accent and mixed with a really mediocre british accent, it wasn’t too... understandable. i couldn’t understand most of his dialogue and because he can’t do accents well, his acting becomes affected. 

- mikkie volante’s voice is so fucking beautiful, how do you even sing that high and make it look easy? anyways, she portrayed a very frightful johanna very well, and i can’t believe how much the costume and wig really affects my perception of the character. it’s just... i can’t take her seriously if she looks... like that. okay, enough about the costumes-- her johanna felt scared and i felt that, but when she fell in love with anthony, she was desperate, and i fuckin loved it. being isolated for your entire life will leave you desperate for affection and mikkie fucking nailed it!

- andrew fernando was so-so as the judge. he wasn’t... creepy, or disturbing. his character is disgusting and so close-minded but i never felt any eerie vibes from him. i also think the costume he had was restricting him from doing anything because he had layers upon layers of clothing and when he began whipping himself, he looked like he struggled a lot to sing and do the actions (the costumes for this production is just so off in general it’s a bit offensive). there wasn’t much stage presence from him and i just wanted him to act a bit filthier.

- arman ferrer as the beadle was a trip. he portrays the character as so dumb and i loved it, it’s just the idiotic energy really cracks me up. additionally, his singing, oh my word, his singing is so good. he hits high notes like it was no problem and it was jawdropping. there was not much to say besides his fuckin costume was whack why did he wear that-- but overall, he was pretty solid!

- ima castro was good! she portrayed a crazy beggar woman which was so chaotic and funny and just fucking bonkers and i loved the energy she had! the only thing i note is that, at times, her voice would stop and i’m not sure if it was intentional or not? even if it wasn’t, it actually added to her character rather than brought her down.

- ensemble was... phenomenal. ignoring the costumes for the hundredth time, i love the ensemble so much because they don’t get enough credit yet they nail it every time they get into a production. their acting during the asylum scene? iconic. their accents? iconic. everything was so iconic.

- now, imma just say a few points in the show that i remembered which is worthy enough to tell yall of.

- here i’ll explain how the murders work. it’s kinda... weird. the execution was inconsistent and i remembered three ways on how they were able to kill and cook their victims. firstly, the murder with pirelli is the only one of its kind. sweeney sliced his throat and threw him into the driver’s seat of the car which was confusing considering how the other murders took place. the second kind of murder and the more common one is when sweeney sliced someone’s throat, the victim would walk off the car and walk into mrs lovett’s oven by themselves. i’m assuming that with pirelli, they didn’t bake him yet so they just hid him in some kind of box or crate somewhere. the third kind applied to the judge and the beggar woman wherein when they killed them, it was implied that they were brought to the bakehouse and not burnt.

- here’s my interpretation of how the murders go. in the original, the bakehouse was the basement, but here, i assume since they claim it’s a “bakehouse”, there’s a secret compartment in the barbershop that brings dead bodies directly into the oven. i’m guessing that with judge turpin and the beggar woman, the oven was not on so they were just... brought there? it’s really, really confusing and i wished they cleared it up so i won’t keep wondering about what is where and how things work. i do think that the victims walking into the oven is really genius because it was a perfect mix of comedy and eeriness which i really commend.

- i liked the way they portrayed the streets in this. they used the upper stage and it really clears up where each scenery is set! it isn’t like the bakery and barbershop wherein the set is confusing, it was much better than that. when mrs lovett and sweeney walked up to pirelli’s barbershop, the scenery was so interesting because they walk from above and look down at them. i really, really liked it.

- additionally, the sprays tobias advertised were cleaning sprays found in ace hardware store, that’s funny. also, the only time their haggard wigs would be effective is when tobias used it and nothing else. (i’ve seen better wigs in beautiful, where did those wigs go?)

- the way they portrayed johanna’s place was so, so good. johanna’s room would be atop the upper stage and, ugh, it’s just so well put-together. this whole set was the work of god and no one can convince me otherwise.

- the lighting was great but the sound design was a bit off for me. the electrocution noises were smart to use but i thought it was a bit too loud? like it was really off-putting. i wished they added gross sloshing noises when they were handling the body parts just to add give a better effect when mrs lovett was holding actual intestines and organs.

- the opening of act 2 was hilarious and one of the more intriguing parts of this musical. pangan’s voice? spectacular. lea’s look of distress whilst serving pies? hilarious. the ensemble? god’s gift to mankind. it was so comedic because sweeney is calmly singing about johanna whilst he slices throats and the victims, in a daze, just walk into an oven while mrs lovett’s expression just screams, “yea, that’s life.”

- i can’t believe. they used handkerchiefs to express what a wig is during the asylum scene. like............ really. where are the leftover wigs from beautiful???

- also, it was weird to me that johanna was the one who shot jonas fogg. it was kinda badass of her and perhaps portrayed her character to become more brave but i still kinda thought it was ooc? (ALSO DEAN ROSEN IS GREAT I LOVE HIM HE POSTS CAT STUFF ON IG AND THATS ALL HE DOES)

- okay someone clarify with me because i initially thought tobias escaped the bakehouse, hence why they went looking for him, but they said it was locked from the outside and i’m left confused why they left in the first place...?

- btw whenever lea speaks, i become more of a lesbian, thanks lea salonga.

- when the plot twist was revealed and mrs lovett and sweeney were slow dancing, that was a theatrical experience. god, just... mrs lovett with the most fearful look in her face as sweeney slowly moves her into the oven is so iconic and that has to be one of the more chilling scenes in the musical. then, once sweeney kills her off, she holds the beggar lady close to him and he looks absolutely mournful.

- AND THEN TOBIAS FUCKING COMES BACK AND GIVES THE BIGGEST CHILLS EVER. will i ever stop talking about how good tobias was written/how good luigi quesada is? probably not.

- anyways, tldr; sweeney todd was beyond average but wasn’t perfect, the costumes were. eh. the singing was perfect, the SET was amazing, lea salonga, nyoy volante, and luigi quesada own my heart, and philippine theatre really needs better wig suppliers, someone please donate your wigs to them.

[satannedtrash]

a new year’s resolution | qian kun

summary: where you go out with friends to welcome in the new year, but you never expected to welcome something - or rather, someone - else.

pairing: qian kun x reader

word count: 3.3k/3365 words

genre: fluff. just fluff. pure fluff

format: dot points (still not experienced enough yet :|)

warnings: none unless mild to moderate swearing and total drunks aren’t your thing (also not edited oh dear) (and ooc kun cuz i suck at this ok)

author’s note: tHIS WAS MEANT TO BE FINISHED LAST WEEK BUT STUFF CAME UP SO IT’S HELLA LATE AAA but anyway at first i wasn’t entirely sure what member to write about, but then i remembered how sm didn’t even release a happy birthday post to kun (jan 1). so i thought that i can dedicate this to kun. happy (extremely belated) birthday to the butter-for-our-ears vocalist, angel and mum, kun! (also y/f/n means your friend’s name)

EDIT: just realised there was a whole section missing (i realised after a month because i didn’t want to read back on this - thing - until now) and without it the oneshot didn’t flow, so i added it in. hope it all clears things up!

11:19 pm

before this story starts imma explain sum stuff

first of all: bless kun

second of all: appreciate kun

third of all: say happy birthday to kun

oh and this is an au where the nct members aren’t idols so don’t expect to see saesangs or fans with their cameras out taking a photo of every move they make being mentioned in here

aaand i’m rambling so with that out of the way lez go

laughing at a friend’s joke, you lifted your right hand which held your phone, causing the screen to turn on

“gEEz okay then”

the bright, white light emitted from it shocked your eyes, making you blink furiously

when you could finally see without being partially blinded, you quickly checked the time and placed your phone face-down next to you

“what’s the time?” y/f/n asked, chin on your shoulder

not bothered to check again, you just say “11:19” and then leaned your head on theirs

“can you believe that 2018 is ending?”

“yep. this year sucked for me so i’m down for it to end”

“always looking forward, huh?”

you shifted your gaze from the city skyline to your friend. “have to. can’t afford to stick to the past”

pouting, y/f/n was about to respond when you lifted your head and stopped leaning back on your arms to sit upright

“besides, we gotta enjoy tonight, instead of moping around.” here, you noticed your friend eyeing the beers nearby you and sighed heavily. guess i need to be chaperone for the night

well considering that the rest of your friends and their friends were wasted might as well make sure they don’t mess the docks up

as you handed the bottle to your friend, their expression brightened as they snatched it from you

well damn aren’t they excited to get drunk

wait it’s not even 11:30 yet and we’re still going to a bar nearby after the fireworks wat

“er, shouldn’t you wait till after midnight to drink?”

“nah m8 tis the best time to have some”

(i have just realised that the vibe of this went from serious storytelling to a memey laidback sorta thing damn it)

(oh well i’ll roll with it)

not knowing what to do now that there wasn’t much to talk about, you brought out your earphones and decided to listen to some music to pass the time

calming music, such as a song with nine glorious men singing and some bed squeaking in the background

(i’ll let you guess what song i’m talking about)

you let your head bop to the song as you looked out to the sea port twenty metres in front of you, watching the dark waters ripple

11:48 pm

the next time you turned on your phone to see how many minutes left you had become a third wheeler

quite the strong third wheeler might i add

a few moments after the first song you were listening to finished, your good friend yuta had joined you and y/f/n because his other friends were “too rowdy”

but as soon as he saw the bottles he said “gimme”

so you were sitting there (barbecue sauce on my-) with two just barely sober adults acting like complete children

you had to wrestle out of y/f/n’s koala hug around your waist and escape yuta’s chin noogie to grab your phone

“oh for fuck’s sake” father why have you foresaken me

when you finished preparing yourself for another possible 27 minutes of torture, you turned around to see yuta and y/f/n throwing themselves at each other, singing like magpies

“wE wIsh yOU A mErrY chrIstmAsssss aNd a hAppY nEw yeeeEeAArr!!1!” they then took the opportunity to laugh, squeal and kiss the hecc out of each other’s cheeks

you knew that your friend was absolute shit at singing, but yuta was a whole different story good lord

you thought he was good???

maybe just when he hasn’t had a few drinks

you stared at the two dolphins then promptly stood up and sat down behind them because you had to make sure they didn’t do anything more than whatever the hell this was

not like it could get any worse

you could feel the gazes of pity the others were sending you, but frankly you didn’t care

before, you couldn’t wait for the new year to come, but now you were more eager than ever

someone please save my poor soul

11:59 pm

“yEEEE BOI a minute left!”

eleven minutes have passed and the final 60 seconds of the year were being counted down

you were less excited for the new year and more excited for the end of your chaperoning being closer

all you had to do was get through the firework display, watch the adorable couple in front of you until the bar and let them do what they want (there were sure to be other friends who were willing to let them join in)

it seemed like a simple, solid plan! :D

before you knew it, yuta and y/f/n had already started counting down from 15, so might as well start now

“13, 12, 11, 10...”

you took a glance at y/f/n, who grinned back at you and threw their arm around your shoulder

“7, 6, 5, 4, 3...” here we go

“1 - happy new year!!”

it was at this moment you realised that your eardrums were incapable of tolerating the two dolphins beside you

sINCE WHEN WAS YUTA ABLE TO SCREAM THAT LOUD AND HIGH THIS IS IMPOSSIBLE

yay to starting the new year with loud friends screaming like there’s no tomorrow amiright

you had trouble focusing on the fireworks to the point you could only hear most of the big ones

that’s how hard it was to be next to them but oh well

marvelling at the city skyline, the fireworks seeming like entirely new stars, you began having very deep thoughts

the typical ones, such as “ what will 2019 bring?”, “what will i be like by the end of the year?” and “will i be happy with someone?”

you had asked the exact same things when 2017 shifted to 2018 and found that you actually had an answer for all of them

2018 brought some crappy stuff but also some good stuff to balance that out

you were still sort of the same, because every time something major came up you only changed a bit then went back to normal

and you weren’t with anyone yet, which you had expected

but a little birdy on your shoulder said, “then get with someone in 2019! make it a new year’s resolution!”

your eyebrows furrowed at the thought, but you decided to focus on the sky for now

because since when did you ever make or follow new year’s resolutions?

12:16 am

“12:16 okay then”

turns out you didn’t consider the walk to the bar part of your chaperoning

by the time the display ended, yuta and y/f/n could walk, but not without wobbling and intense laughter

so guess who had to make sure they could at least make the trip to the bar?

“um, are you sure you don’t want to go home yet?” 

“nah, i caan’t, my sister was meaant to be at home-!”- y/f/n stumbled a bit but you caught them before they fell - “-but she’s not, and i can’t beeee home by myselfff”

no wonder

here, you were struggling to keep the both of them propped up as you walked along the road, so there was bound to be a slip up

“you should’ve seen their face! haHA-!” yuta laughed a little too hard and nearly fell over his own feet, prompting you to panic and scramble to keep him from falling to the ground

“oh shit oh shit oh shit oh shit-!”

but you didn’t need to because someone else already beat you to it!

sighing in relief, you looked up to see none other than the great qian kun putting yuta’s arm around his shoulder

he looked over to you gaping at him and smiled that warm smile that looked like it was sculpted by the gods

wow he looks great in this lighting

you were always attracted to kun, ever since you two began talking after stopping a full blown war between doyoung and ten

he appeared so soft and kind to you and you two seemed to have a lot in common

so naturally you hit it off

because who doesn’t love kun? :D

“you’re welcome?” oh shit i didn’t just stare at him for that long did i

“oh - sorry - thanks for that” nice going there y/n you idiot

kun just chuckled and hefted his drunk friend as he started walking, you doing the same

it became comfortably silent as your group made their way down the street and turned left into a reasonably sized bar, which as surprisingly not that busy

you set y/f/n down on a chair that thankfully had a tall enough back to keep them up and sat down next to them, exhaling

kun patted yuta’s back and went to sit down next to you

laying your head on the counter, you thought of striking up a conversation with kun

so, instead of saying things like “happy new year”, “thanks for helping me” or even “they’re hard to deal with anyway”, you just said “woah.”

yEAH AGAIN NICE GOING THERE Y/N

“‘woah’? what’s ‘woah’?” he responded, taking on a teasing, motherly tone

you could hear the grin in his voice

you panicked and stammered some illegible words before you could actually speak

“i meant like, woah, that was exhausting, they made things real hard and all that…”

then you thought of something brilliant

you took out your phone and googled “woah”, only to find that it wasn’t spelled w-o-a-h but instead meant to be w-h-o-a

you frowned but typed “whoa meaning” instead and showed the definition to kun

all the while still laying on the mahogany-coloured counter

to your surprise, he rolled his eyes, laughed and ruffled your hair

“that was a really bad joke but you’re lucky i have the same sense of humor” his laugh was infectious so you had to smile

then he asked, “are you okay? not too tired?”

sitting up, you put your phone back in your pocket

“nah, my arms just ache, but it’s fine.” your polite smile suddenly grew into a wide smirk. “thanks for worrying, mum”

“i’m not a mum!” his expression made you have the sudden urge to burst into endless chuckles

in the corner of your eye, you could see ten, doyoung and johnny elbowing each other, pointing at you and kun and singing “kiss the girl”

you then had the sudden urge to throw some hands

kun (obviously) overheard them and sighed

“why are they like this”

“i wish i knew”

you and kun talked some more, random topics like how uni was going for you, how his singing was, how your book was going, all that jazz

with some playful banter and the occasional jokes that made you laugh so hard your back hurt

“kun loving puns and dad jokes? a coincidence?”

“i only laugh at them to make you feel better!”

“gasp! how dare you!”

“only joking, y/n!”

while you two giggled, y/f/n suddenly turned to you and said, “i think yuta and i will be fine here…”

you stopped and looked back at them, concerned

“you sure?”

“we’ll just go sit with the boys over there-!” a hiccup. “-it’ll be fine!” then, it hit you

is this bitch trying to play matchmaker 

you grumbled “i’m not sure…” but then kun spoke up

“yeah, sure, that’s fine,” when you gave him a quizzical look, he added on, “as much as i don’t trust johnny, doyoung and ten, at least it’s not just the two of them?”

he phrased it as a question instead of a statement, his voice getting higher by each word spoken

you pondered over this

well, he’s not wrong

you exhaled in defeat, saying “fine, go ahead”

y/f/n grinned at you and gave a knowing wink before dragging yuta over to the three boys

two of whom were busy flirting to each other and the other one third wheeling

you raised your eyebrows up and down at them before turning back to kun, who was looking outside

“so,” you started, causing him to look at you, “are you sure you want yuta and y/f/n wreaking havoc with those three?” you nodded in the group’s direction

kun stayed silent for a bit, then said “yeah, i’m sure. it kinda looked like you needed a break from them.”

“true. there’s only so much you can take.” kun chuckled at that and looked outside again

it went silent, but in stark contrast to the vibe of the walk leading to the bar, it was very awkward

too awkward to handle

so you took the opportunity to debate with yourself whether or not you should study kun

damn what if he looks at me though i’m not really risking that

but how can you not look at him? and what’s there to talk about?

it’s not worth the embarrassment

look-

no

at-

no

him 

you were about to take a quick glance, but then kun spoke

“besides, i want to show you something”

once again, another puzzled look

“if you don’t mind, of course”

without another thought, you said “sure.”

“really? you’re okay with it?” you smiled at kun’s eagerness

“yeah, might as well, now that we don’t have anyone to watch over.” kun grinned and stood up, making sure to push in his chair (we love a polite king)

you two were about to walk out the door when you looked at a certain group three tables away from you

johnny and ten were still flirting and yuta and y/f/n were still laughing

but this time, doyoung wasn’t a third wheeler anymore, because a man who looked younger than him was having a somewhat civilised conversation with doyoung

you elbowed kun and made him look at them and made sure doyoung, johnny and ten saw you before both mouthing, “sha la la la la la my, oh, my~”

you took a mental screenshot of their faces before you and kun cackled your way out of the bar

12:47 am

“what are you planning on showing me?”

the two of you had been walking and talking for a while now, but kun still didn’t say what he was going to show you

you were waiting patiently, expecting him to eventually tell you, but you gave in

“it’s a surprise~” he said in a sing-song voice, which slightly irritated you

“i know that it’s at the docks, because that’s where we’re heading,” you gave him a light nudge with your arm. “so might as well tell me now!”

he stubbornly shook his head. “i refuse to tell you until you see it.”

pouting, you crossed your arms and muttered under your breath, “you’re lucky you’re adorable.”

to your relief, he didn’t hear you, because he laughed at your pout and pressed on

you lightly scoffed and picked up your pace so that you could walk alongside him

“can i at least have one clue?” you begged

“uh uh.”

“pleeeaaassee?” he looked at your hopeful smile and rolled his eyes

“fine,” you yelled “yes!” a little too loud, making people stare at you. “your clue is…

“...it’s big and sparkly.” you gave him a look showing that you weren’t impressed

“wow, kun, what a descriptive and totally-not-vague clue! i am sure to get it now!”

kun grumbled, “you sound like doyoung,” before remembering something

“don’t tell me the answer until we get there!” he quickly said, receiving yet another puzzled look. “so that i can give you the benefit of the doubt to make it all the more exciting! it’ll be fun!”

you in turn muttered, “well, you sound like y/f/n, and fine. i don’t wanna ruin the surprise. you look real enthusiastic about it too” he smiled gratefully before leaving you to do your thinking

thinking about that smile :)))))

damn his smile always gets me grrrrr

you pulled your mind away from kun’s personality and tried to think of a place with the clue “big and sparkly”

two came to your mind, the big ferris wheel and the big floating silver christmas tree out on the water

they’re both big and sparkly, but you couldn’t predict which one he was going to take you to

you were hoping the ferris wheel, but you just had to wait and see

“think of any places yet?” you jolted so hard, you threw your phone up accidentally

don’t worry, you caught it

kun looked at you, his eyebrows showing worry but his eyes glinting. “you okay?”

very nice going there y/n, how many more times will you mess up??

and my face feels like it’s on fire oh good lord 

“i’m fine, just got scared,” you had to take a breather before you put your phone in your pocket - where it should’ve been in the first place, but your dumb ass decided to hold it - and gave kun a thumbs up

he gave a thumbs up back and said, “surprised you didn’t scream.”

biting back a retort, you replied. “rude.” you sunk your hands deeper into your pockets. “and as for your question, yes, i did think of a place or two”

“good, because we’re getting close now”

you turned a corner and saw both the floating tree and the ferris wheel come into view

the ferris wheel carriages were lighting up one after the other, making it look like a loading symbol (great comparison there) from afar

a pretty and romantic loading symbol

while the christmas tree was dazzling, the rainbow lights getting brighter and dimmer like a pulsing star

while you two waited for the pedestrian light to turn green, kun said to you, “when we make it to the other side, make sure to close your eyes and keep them closed until i say so”

“let me guess, to ‘make it all the more exciting’?” he grinned and nodded

“yup”

you did as what he had told, closing your eyes and relying on kun to guide you the right way

“i swear to god if you push me off the pier i will drag you down with me”

“now you sound like ten, but don’t worry, i won’t,” he gently pushed you away from an upcoming obstacle. “thanks for thinking so highly of me.”

“no problem, mum” you grinned victoriously when you heard a heavy sigh

you knew you were close to the water when you smelled less alcohol and more salty sea water

“are we there yet?” you asked impatiently. you couldn’t be bothered to be patient anymore

kun said, “waaait,” and guided you a bit to the left. “there! now you can open your eyes.”

“finally, i was wondering when- holy shit.”

it wasn’t the ferris wheel that you were hoping that he’d show you, but it was something you decided was way more worth it

the floating silver christmas tree towered over you both, and it looked like it was the brightest and most colourful thing for kilometres (or miles, you choose)

coloured lines streamed down from the top to the bottom, like a very pink, purple and blue waterfall, while stage lights at the bottom smoothly changed from red to orange to yellow and more

it also reminded you of the windows screen when you used it for the first time (if that even makes sense?)

white light shone from beneath the many large stars decorating the tree, making them pop, and the wind revealed that the tree wasn’t made of smooth silver metal, but silver sequins that showed the water ripples and waves from below

the star at the top was the most intensely bright of them all, with a rainbow outline and a gold center

needless to say, it was pretty darn beautiful for a sight that would otherwise hurt your eyes

you stood there with your mouth wide open, looking like a pathetic fish, and almost missed what kun was saying

“i wasn’t sure if you would like the ferris wheel or the tree, but then i found out that the ferris wheel would be closed today, so i just chose this,” you felt his gaze shift onto you, and you tried not to get flustered. “do you like it?”

you took a moment before you spoke. “yes, i really like it a lot,” the view was that breathtaking it took away your ability to talk like a proper adult. you turned to him and gave a smile, trying to make it look as genuine as you could. “thanks for bringing me here, kun.”

he gave you an equally big grin and said, “you’re welcome. glad you like it too.” he turned back to look at the tree, and you did the same

but not without sneaking a glance at him in all his ethereal beauty

kun never failed to surprise you, whether it be showing you a very rainbow tree, being so kind and trusting or just being himself

your mind floated back to the three questions you had asked yourself earlier, “what will 2019 bring?”, “what will i be like at the end of the year?” and “will i be happy with someone?” and the new year’s resolution you made

you took another look at kun then whispered under your breath, “huh.

“guess i am on the way to completing one.”

[cottonblush]

wild(t) love | zcl, kjw

❧ word count: 1,414

❧ genre: crack lmao

❧ notes: ohmygod i can’t believe this is the first story i’m posting on here i literally wrote this for my friend at 11pm yw rochenle!!

when you first learn that you’re going to be working at sm entertainment you almost cry

bc you’re still in college and struggling™ and this opportunity is a blessing

and you can’t wait to start bc then you’ll get to see your childhood friend jungwoo again

also bc sm is so well known you get to travel with the groups and your college will like let you make up tests and stuff

let’s face it sooman is that! powerful ceo

anyway so you go into it thinking oh it’d be nice to see jungwoo like once in a while

bc you were told you’d be the assistant manager for the rookies

but last minute they’re like LMAO NOpe and they assign you to nct 127

and you’re like !!!! jungwoo is in that group wow am i blessed or am i blessed

so like a month into the job you go to this meeting and they’re like

for nct’s next concept we’ll be going to a jungle to take the pictures we’re going for that wiLDT concept

and you’re like ?? i mean extra but ok sure

and the next thing you know you’re on a plane with nct 127 going to some remote jungle

you, jungwoo, and doyoung are random stuff and like gossiping

also jungwoo is hitting on you and doyoung like at the same time

wow we love a flirt

haechan and mark are having their summer fight 2.0 bc haechan said there’s no difference between coke and pepsi and mark is like sTFU U DUMB BINCH OFC THERE IS I CAN’T ASSOCIATE WITH UNCULTURED SWINE UGH

taeyong, yuta, and jaehyun are watching a basketball anime and do some complex handshake every time the protagonist scores a point

johnny is sitting there still giggling to himself about that time ten said john’s banana even though it’s been like a decade

winwin and and lucas are conversing in chinese and to everyone else they sound like intellectuals bc like,,, the chinese language sounds bEAUTIFul don’t even deny it

but irl lucas is asking winwin how many calories are in a booger and winwin’s like idk man i mean probably like 2 they can’t be that unhealthy

this in turn causes lucas to think that one can survive on boogers bc they won’t gain weight but it’s still food

and then winwin has to explain that you need 2,000+ calories a day so lucas would need to pick 1,000 different noses every day

taeil is still sulking about the fact that yuta stole the seat next to winwin from him

he finds a little bug on the floor and somehow starts an inner monologue like ‘i feel u my friend i know how it is to feel alone and unwanted and not appreciated like this one sided love is really killing us buddy’

but like taeil, sweetie, it’s a bug so it clearly can’t relate

and then taeil sees another bug crawl up to the bug and they creep away together

and he goes ‘oh i see… i guess i truly am alone’ and like a single tear rolls down his cheek as he pulls out his phone and opens up his sad violin music playlist that has like 600 songs

yall get there in like 45 minutes so you’re like lol they said remote jungle watch it be like some dog park

but then you get off the plane and literally choke on your own words bc like,, issa jungle

you guys are told that there’s a secret cabin thing nearby and members will come individually to the jungle each day to take concept pictures so that the group can have a lil vacation

jungwoo is supposed to take his pictures on the third day and it’s finally time so he, you, another manager, and the photographer’s crew drive out to the jungle

and take some saucy pictures

but then a problem arises bc jungwoo sees a snake (it’s actually just a vine that fell from a tree but you figure you should at least save some of his pride) and screams but like soft screams so only you notice

and he like zooms,,, usain bolt? more like jungwoo bolt

you have to go after him bc otherwise you would probably be murdered if fans found out you let jungwoo go into a jungle alone

and somehow the crew just assumes yall ran back to the van so they take off without you

so when you two get back you’re like uHHHHH where yall @ stop playing

jungwoo starts panicking and genuinely thinks you two are going to die and you’re lowkey offended bc you’re thinking ‘my survival skills are excellent thank you very much at least i don’t have a heart attack every time i see a plant’

but all of a sudden you hear this really loud scream

or it’s more like a yell?? or like a cry or a shout? you honestly don’t know

it sounds like tarzan though and you wanna laugh but are also worried at the same time

the trees rustle a lot so you look up and you see some random boy with like

grass green hair and he’s only wearing a leaf skirt and a coconut bra

and you wanna question it like why the bra?? bc it just looks uncomfortable

anyway so this guy is like swinging through the vines when he sees you and he stops and stares for what seems like forever

he starts speaking but yall cant understand him bc somehow his sentences are a mix of korean, chinese, and arabic

you know it’s arabic bc you hear marhaba and you’re like ayEE shoutout to my foreign language teacher in 7th grade your class finally came in handy

so you try to speak back to him and he understands you bc he just launches off a tree, lands in front of you, and speaks fluent korean

and you just go ‘bro what’s up with the arabic’

and he shrugs his shoulders and explains that the last visitor he had spoke arabic and taught him the language

you and jungwoo share a look like,,, visitor? does he have a house or smth

and the guy laughs and is like i’ll take you there!! but i should probably introduce myself my name is chenle

you guys take turns sharing about yourself as chenle leads the way to some mystery location

which turns out to be this giant tree house mansion

and you’re questioning him like did u build this yourself bc no offense dude but ur kinda skinny’

and jungwoo is just in awe and he’s like heck yeah he’s skinny! a skinny leGEND

chenle’s like lol no the monkeys built this for me

uh?? monkeys

and sure enough a group of about 25 monkeys comes into the mansion and like surrounds the three of you and starts inspecting you and jungwoo

one of them sits on your shoulder and chenle smiles and goes ‘oh great they approve of u’

and you go ‘oh that’s chill i guess’

chenle: yeah it’s great it means they won’t beat u with coconuts

you, jungwoo: um wHAT

chenle: [innocent smile]

anyway it’s been quite a day and jungwoo says he’s tired so the monkeys lead him to a couch and sit him down

and you and chenle just talk about stuff and hours go by like seconds

and as you two watch the sunset through the trees

chenle turns to you and asks

i know we just met but i feel like we’re soulmates and u get me will u marry me

and you’re about to respond when you’re interrupted by jungwoo’s slightly sleepy voice saying ‘heCk no y/n is mine binch back off’

and you’re like ‘guys guys calm down let’s not-’

chenle cuts you off and goes ‘yeah you heard her let’s be calm there’s plenty of love to go around we can just share her affection’

jungwoo agrees bc he’s half asleep and bc he thinks that the lil monkeys that helped him with everything are so convenient and he could get used to this life

and that’s how you start the rest of your life with your two husbands in a remote forest in an undisclosed location

and like yall don’t know it but the rest of nct is going crazy trying to find yall but chenle’s monkey family keeps them away so you guys can live happily ever after

[i-might-be-a-kpop-fan]

KPOP SONGS! Part 2/?

So I thought I’d make a list of the songs in my „kpop“ playlist and write a little about them because I’m bored. These are supposed to be chronological, but after looking at the list I’m not so sure about it also because I love to buy music in bulks. 

PT.1

THESE ARE JUST MY OPINIONS/EXPERIENCES TAKE IT WITH A PINCH OF SALT AND DON’T KILL ME! 

Also write me if you wanna chat about it :D 

ZUTTER - GD & T.O.P:

 This song is a little scary tbh, apart from the badass vibes

I always loved T.O.P’s deep ass voice and with GD’s high pitched rap it’s just perfect

The MV is funny, creepy and a bit fucked up but what did we expect honestly :D

They rhyme aLOT in this song which makes it really interesting to listen to

made me addicted to the GD & T.O.P combination 

…..ZUTTER!

THE BADDEST FEMALE - CL:

 It took me a while to understand that this isn’t a solo version of „I’m the best“

It’s the queen saying she’s a bad bitch so you know it’s a banger

As almost all CL songs this is good to let off steam and regain your badass level after someone pissed you off

The MV is a sexual awakening on it’s own and performances of that song are also definitely worth a watch

„Not bad meaning bad, but bad meaning good you know?“

Perfect to practice bitch drops and feel yourself to

Burning Up (Fire) - BTS:

 So I don’t really listen a lot to it but I still like it

Has all kinds of badass vibes and I like the soft breaks in-between

RM’s part is by far my favourite his deep voice is so satisfying

The MV is also really cool

You can see from previous songs I had a badass song phase (I still have this phase, I love badass songs) where I only took badass kpop songs seriously

Growl - EXO: 

Okay, so I sometimes forget about this song haha

A good song that screams SM to be honest which I always thought was not that much the case with other EXO songs

The dance to this is really satisfying to watch and was probably the reason I bought this song

It shows EXO’s excellent vocals, has a nice feel and is easy to listen to 

Quite an early song too

I love that you could potentially dance really hard to this but still is very soft

Instantly recognisable and also a kpop classic I would say

GOOD BOY - GD & Taeyang: 

 Is this a kink? This is a kink right?

An awesome song i have bopped to a million times

I really love the „pretty/good boy“ trope and who is better for that then our bad boys™️ GD and Taeyang?

Their voices sound a bit alike and I sometimes had trouble differencing them….whoops

The dance is so so good and the MV is such an accurate representation of these two freaks

God I just love them and miss them so much

I am the best (JP. Ver) - 2ne1:

Welcome to another round of Aki isn’t capable of differencing Japanese and Korean lol

I must say I prefer this version though, I recently bought the korean version and it’s just not the same I got so used to the english parts lol 

This is also a classic, bow to the queens of badass girl group songs!

The MV made me fall in love with CL and the gang

„It’s 2 in the morning our bodies getting freaky, the beats bumping loud but this boy keeps talking! I can’t really hear him but I think he’s saying he loves me? Put his number on this paper but i throw it like frisbee, huh?“

I C O N I C this song raised me, fed me, dressed me and gave me the kick in the butt I needed.

Oh my god! 

BOOMBAYAH - BLACKPINK:

 Why of course after discovering 2ne1 BP wasn’t far behind

Recently showed this MV to a non kpop friend of mine and she drooled over all of them soooo, you can do that

Loved this song the second it started and love dancing violently to it

I now, btw, also own the whole album but it took me a bit to get into them (I was in girl group denial, don’t be like me show them girls some love!)

OPPA!

Being only four really makes it possible for all of them to shine, the vocals are clean and pretty but raspy enough to fit the concept and Jennie and Lisas raps are perfect as always

The beat is easy as is the whole song, doesn’t get annoying and is just a bop.  

Fantastic Baby - BIGBANG:

Nananananananana wow, fantastic baby!

Well well well if it isn’t history right there

Watch the MV, listen to the song! It’s mandatory to know this I’m sorry I don’t make the rules

Danceable, walkable just all in all go crazy(-able)

Boomshakalaka! 

A bit poppy so maybe not for everyone as it sounds a lot like stuff that is randomly on the radio

A dance song that probably was never intended to be more than that. Typically YG, a bit flatter than Bang Bang Bang

I’m repeating myself but you know I heard it’s also something non kpop people enjoy (Basically show them all of BIGBANG, lol)

Ice cream cake - Red Velvet:

Oh boy! My first Red Velvet song that I have because the refrain was stuck in my head and I wanted to know what it was

There’s way more RV later on but for now I think it was the only song

As I said I was in denial of girl groups that didn’t have a badass concept which was soooo dumb!

I love the song, it’s cute and easy to listen to

I love RV’s kinda cute-creepy concept and with the music box in the background it feeds into my liking very easily

I have moved on from it though after discovering other songs from them so I don’t listen to it as often

„I scream, you scream, gimme that, gimme that ice cream!“

Sherlock (Clue + Note) - SHINee:

I have known this song for years! Back when my best friend was into kpop and told me all about SHINee I looked into it, Youtube gave me this song and I instantly clicked. Didn’t like it clicked away and didn’t touch it for 5 years

Well now I love it and can’t stop dancing when it’s on

„SHINees back….“

The MV is confusing but god they’re all so cute in it! Taemin looks so adorable with long hair!

I have watched the dance practice about 100x times and you should too! (jk)

„Tonight, SHINee’s in da house! So give it up for SHINee!“

And as much as I love SHINee’s vocal squad and they’re great in this, Key and Minho really do it for me in this song

The song lives from the dance and the performance and makes it 10x better

It’s also good for just listening though but not really calm and casual so be prepared to break out into sudden song

„Oh I’m curious, yeah!“ (Is it noticeable that I’m listening to it while I write? probably not.)

Breaking News - SHINee:

 And my struggle with japanese songs continues haha

„Come on break down the walls!“

I really like this song though, especially the refrain it’s so much fun

It’s also really danceable (as I think every SHINee song is, I mean have you seen them dance?)

Partly really dramatic (slay Onew slay), partly badass rapping

I mean it’s SHINee it’s fun bright and has a dance rhythm what more could you possibly want?

Ring Ding Dong - SHINee:

 Yeah, i doubt you don’t know this one

Coincidently the first kpop MV I watched after deciding to dive deeper down the rabbit hole and well would you know it…now we’re here

It’s the one about the broken doorbell! Break it down!

This song and dance is Legendary!

Also a fun song that isn’t to be taken too seriously

The MV is kinda dramatic for this song lol

Good to listen to, has a nice beat and melody

There are these songs that every idol can dance to, this is one of them (In the list of “songs every idol can dance to” you’d find a LOT of SHINee btw)

„Ringdingdongringdindongringdigidingdigiding“

SHAKE THAT BRASS - AMBER (feat. Taeyon):

Amber…oh Amber. I love her really a whole lot and as I saw the MV I just had to have this song!

It’s a super fun and dancey song with (as the title suggests) a brassy sound

Much like Woof Woof I really enjoy this song bc of the MV, 

Amber is rapping and being the goofball she is ;)

BUT! As much as I like that song and think she deserves all the solo stuff she can get I like her new stuff more because it’s more „hers“. I really enjoy her singing as well.

And confession of the month: I don’t like f(x)’s sound so I’m happy she does solo stuff

She’s such an inspiration with her unique style and attitude (sighs in very gay)

 Lucifer - SHINee:

 I LOVE this song! OMG!

The MV is kinda uneventful but the DANCE PRACTICE!

Oh boy! Well first off Lee Taemin is very distracting in it but you have to see the dance to believe it! That’s what they perform with! On a regular basis!

The sound is very electric and theres a quiet electric melody running through the whole of it that kinda sounds like some alarm clocks lol

Edgy™️

You should absolutely watch performances! Jonghyuns high note is not portrayed well in the recorded version, boy has breath forever!

Apart from the vocals slaying absolutely every note the rap parts can’t be discarded by any means

It all just fits so perfectly

Oh and of course for a song of it’s time it’s just a little bit...nonsensical (especially the english parts lol: Loverholic, robotronic. what?)

Hero - MONSTA X:

 I’m thinking of a helicopter landing platform, pulled up shirts and a scared Wonho 

The dance to this song is…well do yourself a favour if you like abs and boys

Apart from the drool worthy performance, the song is super cool! Kinda chill, but still powerful and damn rapline went off!

This song really made them known more and it’s for a good reason

The sound in this is what is „typically“ MX for long time (Till up until Jealousy I’d say)

„I can be your hero, I can be your man!“

Sometimes a bit repetitive but what song isn’t lol?

Also still is in the „we all dress awful and don’t know what to do with our hands“ phase but that passes soon

Lead to many wonderful reality shows that makes it easy for new fans to get to know them better (Their group dynamic never changes they all just mature a bit it’s really nice to see.)

Also yes, Jooheon is kinda scary in this but I swear he a cutie

[jewel-s-blog]

about me + bias list

 hi there, I’m jewel :)

she/her/hers ・ 20 ・ kpop (writing) blog

Yes, Jewel is my real name although my parents admit I was supposed to be named elizabeth but changed their minds last minute after I was born how cute and I’m currently in university. I study political science and japanese for those wondering (because yes, I am japanese and it’s helpful when you live in hawaii to have that degree yk?). If any of this stuff is even mildly interesting and you have any curiosities, pls feel free to ask me!

I try to write some things when I can, so feel free to take a look at my masterlist. I also read A LOT of fics on this site, so also peep my recs if you feel like it. Warning: its mostly fluff and angst and almost always includes smut but there’s some really good stuff worth reading still! 

Feel free to talk to me :) i don’t have any kpop friends irl :( all my friends are locals smh 

I try my hardest to be active as much as possible but it’s taken me over a year to finally get used to tumblr lol marklee and i both struggle with complex technology i guess Of course, there are times when I get busy with college and will probably seem to drop off the face of the planet exam season kills but now that I’ve been in quarantine for a month, I figured now is the best time to start building an active tumblr routine. 

That’s all for now! Keep reading below for my bias list :)

xoxo, jewel <3

Bias List 

Before I begin, I will warn that this is basically a giant NCT shxtpost. With LOTS of hyperlinks for educational purposes and absolute crackhead-ery. I’ll eventually make a separate list for other groups I stan, but this blog is mainly NCT and this is already so long so I’ll leave it as this. Enjoy!

Biases are bolded in the beginning of each unit, so you can skip everything after if you don’t wanna see my ramblings following it.

A/N: After biasing nearly every member in NCT/WayV I’ve settled for now on my biases for each unit. This will most likely rotate fairly regularly as I literally fall in love with a different member every day cited here. solo stan? I don’t know her.

ULT

Jaehyun  *ahem excuse me i mean* 

Johnny Suh, it’s official. Don’t know how to explain, but I love everything about him. In the end, it’s always him. damn i sound like y/n thoughts but istg it’s true From SM Rookies to NCT Life to MV behinds, he’s the one. But I’ve also come to realize that I find myself most relatable to him as a person and I think that’s why no one else can trump him wow narcissist much jewel It’s kind of just my gut feeling. It also helps that hes the fluffiest tall, muscular tight booty hottie on the planet. See this black on black dance practice for further scientific explanation even in this jaehyun trying to wreck me so badddddd

Not gonna lie, I HAD IT BAD FOR MARK LEE still do and yet Johnny overcame that. If mark lee were my first love, johnny is my soulmate.

UPDATE! 

Lee Jeno has officially been added to the ult list. *See the entirety of my april activity on my sns accounts if you would like to see how this happened haha :)

NCT U  

im in love with him bc he literally reminds me of my boyfriend -- i like chill guys ok

Taeil is my little teddy bear who looks great in red hair and has a voice form heaven. Evidence? Here you go. He didn’t stand out to me much in the beginning because I was either deaf or blind but after Chain, the game was OVER. +moon taeil in shorts?? serve them thighs honey. Love you bebe tomato <3

BUT Doyoung is the #1 bias wrecker here because have you seen his cover of beautiful on masked singer?? have you?? if not, let me educate you. Also his collab with Sejeong?? Literally the cutest MV ever, perfect for Christmas, listened to it every year since it’s release.

Listen to Coming Home - NCT U for further scientific evidence that NCT has top vocals in the kpop industry.

NCT 127

THE Jung Jaehyun. For reasons that need no explanation. but ill give it anyway smh

After watching the performance of herin and jaehyun singing a whole new world I knew that was it for me. (I still watch it once a month for my jaehyun-related health and to honor SM’s biggest loss, seo herin and ji hansol but thats for another conversation) back to jaehyun His vocals are unique in NCT and bring a nice color to their songs, the man looks good in literally anything, and I’ll probably say this about every member, but I love his dance style--body rolls for days sis. Definitely my ideal type, which my boyfriend is 100% aware of; no secrets in my relationship ofc which explains the wreckage. Pretty sure 81% of the fandom gets wrecked by him daily, so I think I’ll stop here. 

NCT Dream 

Renjun.  why? i just think he’s neat but no really, it was this performance (ok actually this got me ALL SORTS OF WRECKED) and this fancam that had me falling in love with him but were gonna ignore the fact that I get bias wrecked DAILY by all the other members  GOd-tier vocals, personality for daysssssss, variety KING HUANG RENJUN. Safe to claim that I go into renjun feels about 3x a week. Check my twitter for proof. +dnyl renjun was a blessing and I sometimes cant believe that it actually happened. How do I explain?? He’s literally the best boy, but when he gets all worked up....let’s stop there before I have to go to confession again.

But for fun, lets list why I have biased every dream member at some point shall we? (in no particular order) Dream might just be my ult group, songs always bop, members at star quality 

mark- yes i am including mark bc he was the reason i even started stanning dream dreamies leader since mmc days, mentor, A1 rap skills, ad libs go crazy, unparalleled dancing style, hardest worker, cutest watermelon advocate ever, all around amazing person can you tell he used to be my ult? + he’s a good christian boy and my catholic *ss has to confess my sins for being a simp for him 24/7

chenle- vocal GOD, most steady live vocals in kpop, laugh to die for

jeno- i cannot resist his eye smile i wanna cuddle and onstage charisma-2:54 “let’s goooooo” and i alskfdfjlkdldkfa. 

jaemin- “other than my members, i don’t have any friends” and yet he’s literally the most caring and wonderful little puff in existence fight me pls dont im a pacifist 

heachan- idk why but donghyukie feels like he could be my best friend and also cant stop staring at him in their dance practices his body proportions are unreal and his vocal ad libs?? don’t even get me STARTED on heachans vocals

jisung- he is my son, but also my son’s vocals?? MWAH that voice got me second guessing if he’s really my son 

WayV 

Ten Chittaphon Leechaiyapornkul another member where it kinda just....happened? In the end I was like “damn, when did you sneaky bugger get in my heart?” He’s got a similar vibe as Johnny AND DO NOT COME FOR MY THROAT FOR SAYING THAT THATS MY OPINION Like Johnny, I see myself in Ten. There are so many reasons why I love Ten, so I’ll make it simple and provide them to you. 

Reason 1 - Performance/dance  he just hit different, he’s THAT good. Reason 2 - vocals the amount his vocals has improved?? UNMATCHED. Reason 3 - INTELLECTUAL (still trying to find the clip of him talking about different kinds of love) Reason 4 - multi-lingual KING ok so this vid is him struggling in mandarin, but imagine, you speak thai and english and learn korean to debut and all of a sudden your agency says “ok learn chinese now.” MANDARIN IS ONE OF THE HARDEST LANGUAGES TO LEARN. Reason 5 - bad b*tch he just radiates bad bitxh energy in everything he does, and I appreciate a bad bitxh

BUT I love wayv’s chaotic energy and chemistry so much that I literally love them all dreamies watch out 

+special shoutout to xiaojuns vocals in Love Talk

+kun being a dimpled zaddy (jaehyun&kun type CONFIRMED)

+lucas holding binoculars like THAT @ 1:10

+yangx2 doing THIS (prepare to be blown away)

+hendery being a the best teacher 

+winwin BEING WINWIN THE DANCE GOD 

+winwin AGAIN and with Ten here i don’t even think i have to say that i tweeted about this everyday for a month and im still not over it. This specific dance really allowed winwin to shine even though ten is my bias. It really allowed others to see the fruit of his classical training even in modern dance which he never trained in. Not gonna be repetitive and SCREAM  say that he’s underrated, because we all know that already. Just show winwin some love, ok? thank you.

And so finally, we’ve reached the end. Phew, this took me almost 5 hours to put together because I definitely got carried away. For those who made it all the way to the end, thank you, I love you. It’s so messy and I don’t have the mental capacity to do anymore editing but I hope you got something from this massive post <3 Feel free to let me know what you think! xoxo, jewel