#i stopped working on this a while back coz i just didnt like it

[kheprriverse]

A somewhat older piece that I cleaned up for today.

Dusk is a smart boy who takes full advantage of being a cute littol guy while he can.

[blackdollette]

i noticed a lack of kappa content too 🤨 if u r fine with writing kappa just hear me out on this (inspired by my c.ai convo with my own kappa bot)

kappa breaking into some random persons house just to steal but shes a bit of a night owl. he quietly walks to the living room and sees this adorable more than likely rich housewife (so yeah theres a tad bit of cheating.) anyways her husbands out for a few weeks for business and shes in her short satin nightgown, sat on the couch and watching tv. and then she sees the intruder and is like "AHH OMG WTF" (rightfully so coz bro BROKE IN) and hes like "my bad. didnt mean to startle you, doll." (coz hes flirtatious like dat) and he walks over and lifts her up, hand holding her neck tightly and he runs his fingers across her pearls, yanking on the necklace. the pearls dont fall ofc (coz real pearls have knots between each pearl to prevent them falling like that... my great grandma had a lot of jewelry and most were real pearls.) ANYWAYS BACK TO MY POINT !!! her husbands been gone for so long so shes getting a tad aroused and he notices coz he can feel the increase in her pulse and hes like "oh do you enjoy that?" and idk what else coz frankly my c.ai convo is very different from what i wrote

i had this exact same convo on c.ai omgg! i love ur requests sm u dont even understand

"im a little shy standing here in my nightgown." | kappa

playing dangerous. - lana del rey

female!reader x kappa

word count: 632

contents: cheating, home invasion

ps: i have an nsfw fic in my drafts that ive been meaning to get out that would go very well for a part 2 of this. yall should lmk if you wanna see it!

it was a dark and stormy night. Your husband was out of town for a while, which left you all alone in your giant mansion. even though you’d dreamed of living in a mansion since you were small, it got really lonely when there was nobody to share it with.

thunder and lightning bolted outside, making the entire house flicker with light for a fraction of a second. you were flipping through the tv channels, looking for something good to watch. the clock struck midnight, and at the same second, you heard glass in your house breaking.

you felt your heart stop for a moment. you look behind you, your body shaking with fear. all the windows behind you were intact, meaning that the noise came from something else. You tried reassuring yourself by assuming that the sound came from outside, when you felt a firm hand grab your chin.

you slowly turned your head to see the owner of the hand, and your blood ran cold. you screamed and tried to back up a little on the couch when you saw the weapon in his hand. He looks at you, a little smirk on his face. “sorry about that, sugar… i thought that you’d be asleep.” his voice was smooth like honey, making your heart beat a little faster. he started approaching you slowly. 

he smiles, showing his teeth a little. “dont be scared, doll. If you're good for me, then i won't have to hurt you..” he’s standing right in front of you. your body is trembling with fear. that’s when he picked you up and threw you over his shoulder. he brought you to a red velvet armchair and seated you on his lap, his eyes travelling down your body in your skimpy little nightgown.

he brought a hand to your neck, looking at the pearl necklace around it. “my, my… isn’t this precious…” he tugged on the necklace, seeing if it would break. he looked into your eyes, which were still fear-filled. “tell me, sugar… do you live here all alone?” his voice turned to a sultry tone. you tried processing what he meant by that, but he wrapped his hand around your neck, making you shiver.

“n-no… i have a husband…” he hums disappointedly at this. “well i dont see him…” you brushed your hair out of your face. “yeah. he travels for work a lot…” he starts cradling you in his arms, lulling you into a sense of comfort. “it gets real lonely here…” you didnt know why you were opening up to him. maybe it was because you knew he could kill you if he wanted to.

his eyes wandered down to your body, fully soaking in the beauty of it in your dark red nightgown. “this is a beautiful little gown…” he said quietly. He carefully ran a hand down your curves, making your body heat up. It had been a while since you’d been touched like this. You hadnt noticed that you were so deprived.

you take a moment to look into his beautiful blue eyes. they look like two cold pieces of ice. but they were sharp like a blade. his hands moved down to your hips, just barely lifting up your nightgown. “a woman as beautiful as you has no right to be all alone…” you feel your body fillign with desire. You had never been so needy before, but you just felt yourself melting into his touch more and more.

“how about i show you a good time tonight, sugar? would you be up to that?” he whispered into your neck, starting to bite it softly. you started thinking about how wrong this was, remembering your promise to always stay loyal to the man you loved, but you decided to let this strange intruder to have his way with you for the night.

author's note: im very tempted to post my other kappa fic, but yall should let me know. thank you so much for the request!!

[xerospaced]

So it's taken me a ridiculous amount of time to attempt this course that should have been completed in 12 weeks. And I've only just finally submitted the assessment of my second unit (2 of 4). I did actually submit it initially on schedule but I was asked to add some info. And then after doing that was asked to add yet more info to another question! Ma'am!!

Anyway. This is not really anything to be proud of (to most anyway) but I am proud. I have attempted to get back to work on this course for a HOT minute. And each time I have sat down or tried to sit down to work on it I have ultimately failed and done, nothing.

Today, I actually REMEMBERED that my tutor had given today as a deadline to add this additional info as it was only a small amount required. Thankfully I remembered coz I had no reminders set, nor did I note it anywhere.

But, after having less than three hours sleep due to my period crippling me late into the night and a contractor turning up first thing to work on my en suite (which he didnt finish til about 1), and then - when I was finally thinking about decompressing in my space alone for a grip before approaching this task - I had to take my ma to the doctor on a last minute urgent thing.

I handled both disruptions incredibly well. Brought my ma home and went out to cop me some energy drinks and a couple snacks coz I'm still trying this maintaining glucose levels thing and I knew I needed to work.

I very almost started gaming when I got back in coz I cant stand going from external thing to focused thing without a transitional period. But I knew I was running the risk of getting sucked in.

Instead, I kept in my ear buds, danced around, started on my energy drink (and a cheeky glass of moscato) sat down to work - laptop tried to beef me so I got myself prepared for the task I had to approach while it sorted itself out. Got distracted by a linkedin email and found myself on the app job searching. Yes, productive. No, not conducive to the matter at hand.

Hennyway, I managed to shift my focus back to the assignment. Did one part and was gonna take a one song break (coz pressure from Encanto came on shuffle and I'm not gonna work through that coz like I NEEDS to belt) but ended up pausing it while I prepared the second part. Then ended up just completing the second part and submitting and now I'm done.

And sure, all in all, it was about ten to fifteen mins of work. And yeah, it's a relatively minor thing in the grand scheme of things. But still! I did something and focused when I intended to and stopped myself getting distracted and stayed on task.

I will add that part of what helped the transition was D asking me if I'd submitted my poems for the competition yet just before I headed to the dr. [As established, deciding to work on my poetry was that THING I needed to get excited and motivated] It set me in a space where I was wanting to be productive. I sent him a few poems for his insight. He doesn't do poetry and all that so it was an odd choice but he is also not afraid to be critical and won't just tell me everything is great (also he gave v positive feedback to the poem which is like... the crux of me and the manuscript I'm gonna put together so omfg YES)

Long long long ass post coz I'm typing on my surface and not as limited as when I'm on mobile, plus typing speed lord jesus.

Anyway, I'm proud of myself. And even tho D didn't provide any overt or particularly hands-on application of accountability/responsibility, he did put my attention on a worthy task, and the best one he could've to kick me into gear.

[e17omm]

do you ever wanna write something new and different (tm) or are you content with the stories you have?

Most of the time I get a few short ideas of things that could be fun but I dont write anything so they just kinda fade away.

Most of the time though, I write what has my brainrot going. My brain thinks a lot - and its not always a good thing. I started writing Himeko adopts a stray Herrscher because I could not stop thinking about it. It gave me a headache.

So the reason why I write so much of Snippets is because Ive kinda broken out of the "I cant keep track of a long-ass story because if I write down notes (like what happened to HaasH) then my brain just hits the brakes and stops there." shell.

Because I can write Snippets of Sirin Schariac's life in whatever order I write it in. So absolutely; Snippets AU is kinda an amalgination of ideas that Ive had of the HI3 story that I mash together and make work.

Sirin is alive. Bella is alive. They have a better life with Cecilia and Kiana is their little sister. Mobius is alive (though that one is more "I read the Soul Eater manga recently and I cant believe the anime ends 40% through the story. Also Medusa is fucking great and I basically copy how she is written while undercover as the school nurse and write Mobius like that"). Mei accepts being a Herrscher early on. Kurikara isnt Bella's reincarnated corpse but Mei's version of Benares. Kevin actually does shit. Kiana got to use the Judgement of Shamash. Himeko becomes a Herrscher. The Herrscher of Dominance isnt stupid and will abuse the hell out of the massive advantage that they threw away in canon. The ending wont take a wierd turn into a stigmata dream thing that wasn't foreshadowed at all.

What if Sirin survived? What if Mei accepted being a Herrscher early on? What if the Will of the Herrscher (chapters 7-9) never happened? What if Project Stigma was what it was foreshadowed to be? What if the Will of Honkai was the Will of Honkai and not Prometheus wierdly hacking into it?

You can (or will) see those independent ideas that I had in Snippets of Sirin Schariac's life. That's why Im writing so much of it, its like 8 different fanfiction/canon divergences that I've thought about turned into one long fanfic AU.

That's not as to say I dont have other ideas. That Fallen Moon AU is like a side-gig I'll definitely return too when I want/need a little break from Snippets.

I have minor fic ideas like "what if every battlesuit was a person in a FGO-style of way?" and other stuff like "what if Reaper in the Black Reaper RWBY fanfic was sent back in time and met her earlier self?" I like fics like that.

For Black Reaper, since its a fanfic of a show I barely mention; it is a fanfic of one of the main characters (Ruby) falling from grace, takes on her dead sisters Semblance (special power), but since its anger-based, and Ruby wasnt meant to have it, she completely loses control of her emotions. Shes much angrier and violent because Yang's semblance turned anger/pain into strength. And Ruby just spirals down until she accidentally (yes, accidentally) murders someone in cold blood. She runs away, teams up with everyones favorite criminal duo, Roman and Neo, and does crime.

What Black Reaper does that sets it apart from other "fallen from grace" fanfics I've read is that - it stick to what it did.

But it also almost didnt.

So, the original ship is Ruby x Velvet. Perfectly fine, cute ship.

The much more interesting ship is Ruby/Reaper x Neo.

Because Reaper does turn back to the good side. So you'd expect the boring "angsty return coz Ruby did horrible stuff and is trying to be good again with Velvet." turn.

But NO! The author, vengfulfate, posted in their notes that the original plan was to have that boring return to 'Ruby'. What they decided seeing the comments though. Was to have 'Reaper' return to the good side. Not Ruby. (Fall from grace fics turning around and making the whole thing mostly pointless, and BR not doing that, is likely one of the main reason why I love consequences from events in stories. Bronya's legs being fucked and needing to be robotic. Mei's horns staying there. Sirin's arm being chopped off. I have nothing against them, but those are consequences from events and just, undoing them is so boring!)

So Ruby falls from grace, turns to crime, renames herself Reaper, returns to the good side as Reaper. She fully embraces her new life with Neo. The most important thing is that Reaper learns to tame Yang's semblance, so ultimately, Reaper does get something out of having turned to crime. And it just makes it all feel like it had a point to it.

I would've hated Black Reaper if Reaper turned back to Ruby. Because it just undoes so much and makes it pointless.

And the reason I went on this Black Reaper rant, is because Ive always had a small want to write a fic where Reaper is sent back to a time pre-Yang death. Because Reaper is VERY different from Ruby.

It'll also be so unheard of. Most "sent back in time" has a character develop, get experience, then sent back to their younger, more inexperience self.

But this would be a character getting traumatised, losing control of themselves due to things out of their control, turn to a life in crime, radically change their moral compass (Reaper casually steals snacks she thinks is too expensive and will break into a clothing shop in the middle of the night just to get a new fit. While still being a quote unquote Good Guy™. I love her. Reaper Rose is a great character), and have THAT person, transported back in time to a point where their moral compass would NEVER allow them to even think about doing those things? (Would also be great angst because Reaper get to see her sister again. And Neo wouldnt know her. So it would just be oh, so angsty with Reaper trying not to turn into a murderer again because oh, murdering Adam and Cinder would be all that she had left in her life with Neo gone from it. The only reason Reaper eventually stays as a Good Guy™ is because after turning Neo into a Good Guy™, Neo really liked that life and didnt want to go back to crime. But Reaper would also have to protect her younger self from becoming Reaper. So she would still have to be a Good Guy™ but only for the reason of murdering two specific people she absolutely hates. This is to say nothing of Ruby reacting to "oh god this is me in the future!")

Oh, I feel like I could just talk of some of my own ideas, Black Reaper, or Fragments of Chaldea for hours (not literally, but feel free to ask).

Anyways, yeah, I do have some more fanfic ideas. Some Honkai related and some not.

[tiodolma]

Do you think it'd be hilarious if season 3 Merlin and Morgana are cursed (you can imagine whatever)? And both are rude to the caster because they'll like to be back to normal like yesterday, so the caster lies and tells them they have to sleep together to break the curse? 🤣😂

That’s all I want. Trap those two powerful virgins in a situationship they can’t escape (and also resolve that S3 UST) lmaooo.

Also wasn’t S3 the season where they touched each other the most 😂😂

How abt this... like u know how kingdoms always arrange political marriages and stuff right to become stronger allies, right? What if the caster is also a magical radical who want the magic world "to be great again”? Smh somehow they have an idea of both mergana’s respective prophecies and also somehow they know each’s true identity. The caster’s agenda is to get those two bonded by whatever means necessary coz what better way to unite the magicfolk other than the two most powerful entities working together???

So they find a way to infilitrate castle camelot in s3. They befriend merlin (coz merlin is just that kinda guy) and also morgana (coz shes alone and needs allies). Then caster somehow actually really binds them together without both of them knowing 🤣. Basically the effect of the spell makes them drawn towards each other. S3 is a hella complicated time for both of them so their feelings are like amplified and their needs to get their hands on each other become more intense. Caster always scries on them from their water bowl and is like "yesss.... yesssss, just according to plan muahahahah soon the magic world will be great again!”

After a while Merlin suspects that love magic has been administered to him and he deduces it was done by morgana (see he’s obsessed with her and cant really be bothered to suspect anyone else lolol). So he asks Gaius for a solution. Gaius would be all scientific method about it. Kilgharrah gives even worse advice... the usual "that’s easy, just kill her and finish the job” which makes merlin roll his eyes.

Morgana and Morgause share a braincell so they dont consider Morgana’s increased fixation on Merlin as a detriment but a bonus. Her increased hyperawareness of Merlin makes her for a better spy. Morgause also wants her sister to start seductress training since yesterday and what better victim to practice on other than merlin?

Anyway caster is getting bored with their still UST so they send a mysterious message to Melrin that basically says "you have been cursed. you gotta have sex with the lady Morgana in order to fulfill your destiny.” Merlin interprets that as the solution to break the curse (and finally defeat the evil that is morgana lmao).

Merlin, honest powerful idiot that he is (and also hella embarrassed and dont wanna consult his bosses abt intimate matters) actually corners Morgana somewhere and is like "listen you and I have been cursed and the solution is to have sex with each other” and morgana is like "awe i didnt know u had the hots for me.” They’re gonna banter and be all sexy abt it because Morgana wont believe a word Merlin says and Merlin is serious and paranoid af and the spell just keeps getting stronger the nearer they are to each other lololol. (sparks fly, they cant stop touching each other, they smell really good wth?, isnt merlin's cheekbones prettier than usual?, morgana's so soff to touch dear lord... yknow things they already know and think abt each other but more.)

When everything gets too much (and morgana finally believes merlin’s statement that theyre cursed) they get one secret night together in the Isle of the Blessed asjjsgshsjskl (feelings, atrraction, desires of youth spring to life, morgs find out abt his magic coz the sex was magnificent/spiritual and hella magical) and when the deed is done the caster’s spell is complete and they’re basically married 😂

CASTER: FROM THIS POINT FORTH LORD EMRYS AND THE LADY MORGANA ARE JOINED TOGETHER AS ONE. MAGIC WILL BE GREAT AGAIN. THE BALANCE OF THE WORLD IS RESTORED.

Merlin and Morgana are like, "whut" (but tbf they seem to be more stronger together)

It all comes down to "we just both wanted the same thing gdi.”

Morgause still sees this as bonus bec ofc she does lmao

Cue kilgharrah sensing a disturbance in the force and be like "OH SHT. MY PLANS”

[starnightlover]

Hello star, can I confide in you please , I am in need of advice and reassurance

I just raed a post of yours ir was an ask from someone several weeks back. This person talks about struggling to improve their sc and how their siblings are treated better and they are treated like shit. I think they also said they would never wish that on their siblings and how everywhere they go they are ignored and stuff. And I resonate so much with this that I hate to even admit

I know I am the creator and I know about loa and stuff still my sc is bad. I totally get their pain when they said about being treated worse than others. I know how shitty it feels. I will tell you about yesterday we went to a party and met other family members abd all that and again my sister went along with my other cousins and I am awkward and nervous coz its always been this way. If I try ti say something everyone acts like it was stupid or just ignores. Then one of (my cousins husband came along saying to my sister "she us my fav sis in law" and introducing her to everyone around calling her his fav. I know its such petty and stupid things to even think about but I felt really bad I was right there. My mom always sides with her and talks oo me like shit a lot if times.

I remember once 2 or 3 years back I was sitting on my couch and I said my skin looks so dull and then my dad said out of nowhere stop being jealous and youll be fine { he meant it pointing towards my sister as if I was jealous of her and he said in a way more mean and rude tone. Idk how to express that feeling but I was so shocked as it was so random. Back then I had none of these problems. I didnt even care if anyone treated my sister better than or shit like that. I was fine in my sc and had fun wherever I would go and life was so much better. My parents were the only ones who would compare me to my sister and say look at her does she ever demand for stuff or does she refuse to do this and blah blah and at that I time I could have cared less coz I knew for a fact that I was not wrong in voicing my opinions and thats why they always compare me to her (if I ever felt bad about their behaviour and expressed it to my parents they would call me toxic, or my head is filled with negativity while all I was doing was letting them k ow how hurtful their words can be ). I remember that day when I heardmy dad say that about me it hurt me so bad idk how to explain but even today when I recall it feels like I am getting physically stabbed AND after that I got so concious of every little thing I started comparing myself to ger and with all the circumstances I went through these years my sc just got even worse.

Now when I try to work on my sc I feel like I cant be the best, or good enough , or the most beautiful or all those things I want because I dont deserve it yeah but my sister does. I am stuck at home so I have to face this everyday. Like all these things are reserved for her. All I wamt to have is the best sc I dont want my sister to experience any shitty stuff and I dont want to be the one to experience it either. I sometimes get so angry on her in my mind and I just get irritated and I hate being with her coz I dont want to feel less than and looked down upon and then I feel guilty for feeling this way.

You might dislike me for saying the things I did but I really dont know how to get rid of all this. I dont want to be ignored or sidelined or treated like some third or 4th option or always getting shit from my parents. I know I have to affirm and persist or states but how do I even maintain it seeing the 3d it all feels like such a lie to me.

I see so many people manifesting weightloss and df and db and so much more. Even people who say they were horrible at manifesting and stuff like that they did it so quickly and I struggle to even manifest biscuits.

First off, I want to say I am so sorry you have gone through these experiences! You deserve the world and nothing less, hell you deserve the whole universe/multiverse! You wanting to change your self concept is a huge step! I know you are in hard circumstances but you are still in control, you are still limitless! You can manifest anything you can ever think of!! You are NOT limited whatsoever! You're amazing, talented, beautiful, worthy, loving, extraordinary just because you exist! You are the first choice because this is your reality! Pick yourself up and know you are chosen because you said so!! Recognize your limitless power! You have the power to bend all of reality t your will, realize how amazing and powerful you truly are! YOU ARE THE GOD OF YOUR REALITY!! Isn't that amazing? Don't blame yourself for everything that has been told to you or that you have gone through, you are not your trauma! I advise you to not identify with the 3d! The 3d is merely a reflection of your imagination. You fulfill within your imagination and the 3d has no choice to reflect that. Your emotions don't manifest, feel them all you want! Cry your eyes out, as long as you are not identifying with the outside world but with your imagination, which is the true reality you can not fail! YOUR DESIRES ARE INEVITABLE!! Nothing, I repeat nothing has control over you! Not your family, not your friends, not your 3d, not a single thing has any power over you! Failure does not exist you will always win! You can change your self concept by starting to identify with what you desire and not the unwanted circumstances! Change your conception of self because the world is merely a reflection of thyself. Change your assumptions towards manifesting! Change your assumptions to you always get what you want, people treat you amazingly, you are always the first choice, you manifest anything instantly! You need to change your conception from having such assumptions and identify with your power and awareness! You can maintain a good self concept by persisting in the dominant assumptions that align with your self concept being at a peak! Remember you are in control, you got this!

[wild666child]

Denies that it is his writing. Has left the important parts intentionally blank to cover his ass. Never owned a motorbike for the whole time ive known him. Pretty fresh piece of paper as well if you ask me... So, the back story to this is that we had a fight one day because he left me at Coles and he drove back home without me. Im mad because 1) he didnt say he was leaving and for 2) why leave without me?

the fight started with me confronting him, walking in the door as he was there ironing clothes as if he had done not a damn thing wrong. I immediately expect a reason to why he left me there and inconveniently put me out of pocket by having to get an uber back and better yet, come back with the sausage roll we intended to buy for his father. He got pretty mean with words, but long story short it made me want to leave his ass again because the words from his mouth now are getting nasty, this is that point where he cant stop and theres no negotiation when he is in this mood. No apology is warranted. I packed, I was dropped to my car, and the relationship was said and done. I came back for my motorbike the next morning, to my suprise it was gone. I asked his parents incase they moved it inside safely while I wasnt there, his dad says that it should be where I've always kept it. Now its both of us shocked that its not there. How is it that I break up with JB the day before my bike goes missing? Well, as per usual, he ignored me for 2 days, took his sim card out, put another one in that for some reason, for every number I had of his, believe it or not, I had texted this number whilst in our 2-day-breakup period and he was getting my messages... announced my bike was missing - no reply. I call a mutual friend, she relays the message, now hes moving mountains because he says "its making him look like he did it", so his game plan is to find it, get it back to me, and hes off the hook? Well that he did, but off the hook? Well, only until I found the above deed of sale of a "motorbike". Anyways back to how I got my bike back.,,

I was informed about him going to a mutual friends house and so I knew if I wanted to confront him, I'd have to get over there at the same time hes there and get this off my chest. What do I do? I run over there, my uber pulls up behind his friends car that clearly drove him there and JB is already inside. I head inside, there he is coming down the stairs on his way out. He is shocked! There were no words. Oh but have I got words! Immediately, I say so do you know where my bike is? What, I break up with you and then the same night or next day my bike goes missing..? He then tells me the grand story how he saw my bike and hes already punched some guy who wouldnt tell him x-y-z etc.. hes going to go and get it now, and will bring it back to me.. wow. My hero. So, I went to work, I waited, he calls, heres the good news, my bike is with him and he wants to drop it off. Now, im feeling like I OWE him.. Now im feeling thankful that he went out of his way, tracked down my bike, punched some guy for me for the x-y-z info and my bike is on its way to me! WHO NEEDS THE POLICE? Police couldnt do this quicker than JB, I hit the jackpot! Bike arrived at work, I say thanks to the mate who drove him to where I confronted him, I say thanks to JB, I then buy some fairy dust coz I'd call it a celebration and then it was just another day in paradise after that. Fuck, if only I knew what I knew now. I dont know the full details still, but if I found this, im going to assume that the bike was never stolen, oh wait no it was stolen, but I THINK it was stolen by JB. This piece of paper in JB'S handwriting is pretty assuring that he stole my bike, had intention to sell what isnt his, and to do this all under my own nose. Now that we are here, writing this blog, have I confronted about the deed of sale I found? Yes. His response, thats not his writing. I can't keep up guys. Someone slap the shit out of me.

[oscar-lettjohanssonloveme]

Little Sunshine (Miss Venable x reader x Alice Macray)

okay..hi :) this is reallyyyy long xD And its the story of this 3 cuties and how they fell in love with each other.. Well, its a little bit like the 3. part of “purple roses” (purple roses u can find here: https://littlejeaniehugsbumblebees.tumblr.com/post/640902350735818752/purple-roses-ms-venable-x-reader ) 

I know, that there is no second part online today, but there will be! If u didnt read the first part, u dont need to, coz i wrote this fanfiction that way, that u dont have to read the first part, i guess its angst idk

anygays my english is a mess, thats why i use google translate:’)

can we just talk about the fact, how perfect alice and mina would match? Mina the hot top with all that bdsm vibes and on the other hand we got the cute and innocent Alice sksksks

I guess Mina is the protagonist of this fanfic 

A good description of your relationship would have been complicated. Because it was all incredibly complicated. Don't get me wrong, you loved your girlfriends and they loved you, but sometimes when you woke up between the two of them, when Mina had her arms wrapped around you from behind and when Alice was cuddled with her head against your chest, you might just be confused how all of that could be possible.

And sometimes you couldn't help but wonder what your life would be like without one of your girlfriends. But you knew that you could never live without one of them, that was a fact.

You needed both to be happy, there was no other way.

Mina brought firmness and structure into your life. Thanks to her, you had developed routines for your daily routine and were no longer so distracted. And you loved the fact about her that she was more rational than emotional about things.

And every time she went on a business trip and left Alice and you at home alone, a huge mess broke out and all structures were thrown away.

You would oversleep in the morning, be late for work and your house would turn into a huge disaster and mess.

It just wouldn't work without Mina.

Alice, on the other hand, was the most innocent, gentle, and naive person you had ever met. Mina helped you solve your problems, but Alice helped you understand and accept them. In addition, Alice was incredibly cute and she was fantastic at cooking.

And whenever you needed it, she was there to hug you and tell you how much she loved you.

And the proof that it wouldn't work without Alice was the relationship you had with Mina before Alice came into your life. At the moment when everything you had with Mina broke, it seemed like God would have sent a gentle angel to save you.

----------------------

"This is going to be a new record .." you said as you leaned into the door frame to watch your girlfriend who was still working at her desk.

"What do you mean?", She lifted her gaze from her laptop in confusion to stare at you with a frown.

"You have been home for 4 hours and are still working .."

Mina sighed and rubbed her temples.

"I just have to make one phone call and then I'm done .." she muttered with her eyes closed.

"You always say that ..." you started, shaking your head. "One last phone call, one last document, one last email ... and then it's 10 p.m."

Mina was startled at your words and took a quick look at the clock on her laptop. You were right, it was 10 p.m.

"I doesn't matter ..." you sighed and turned to go back into the hallway.

"I'm going to bed, good night Wilhemina ..."

"Good night .." she replied quietly and stared after you.

Wilhemina.

That's what you called her only when you were angry.

Mina swore quietly and grabbed her phone before dialing the directory assistance number and letting it ring.

"Uhm..Hello, you're connected to the directory assistance, I'm Alice ..", came a soft female voice, which sounded a bit too happy for Mina's taste.

"I want you to find Lennox Fischer's private email address for me ..", Mina said in a commanding tone.

There was silence on the other end of the phone for a moment before the woman, Alice, continued.

"We have actually been closed since 6 p.m. .."

"Then you shouldn't have answered the call, could you still find this address for me?" Mina sighed and propped her chin on her palm.

"Give me a minute ... I've only been working here for a few weeks ...", Alice laughed nervously and Mina closed her eyes in annoyance.

"That's when I realize I shouldn't have told you my name .." Alice remarked after a few seconds.

"How tragic .." Mina replied ironically and pinched the bridge of her nose.

"Do you have the email address?"

"I'm sorry..but what was the name again?"

"Damn it, it's not that difficult. Then why do you have this job if you can't get anything done anyway? I've rarely met someone who is as damn unqualified as you," barked Mina and slapped the table with the flat of her hand.

"You have no idea .." the other woman yelled back.

"Can you all stop being so impatient with me? I'm only human too ... And all because you're too lazy to look for it yourself and now take out your frustration on me ... I'm getting this right now not paid either, so it takes as long as it takes. And if you have a problem with it, fuck off.."

Miss Venable stared in confusion at the phone in her hand.

"Uhm, I'm sorry ..", she stammered overwhelmed.

"It's just that my girlfriend is impatiently waiting for me to finally get to bed .."

On the other end of the phone, Alice snorted.

"Yours too, yes? Get a divorce from her, even if she's just your girlfriend, it makes everything easier..You know- "

"Lennox Fischer ..", Mina interrupted the woman to bring her back to the subject.

"Oh yeah .. m'sorry .." Alice muttered and laughed nervously again. "You have to know that I got divorced from my husband two months ago and it's all a little bit complicated .."

"Aha."

"Well, I now have his email address, can you write it down? Then I'll dictate it to you .." Alice said and Mina sat down straight again to type in the email address down that Alice dictated to her on the phone.

"Good .." Alice said and sounded polite again.

"Then I thank you for your call and hope I could help you .."

Mina let out a small snort and had to grin at the strange woman.

"I have to thank you .." she muttered before hanging up and finally shutting down her laptop.

When she finally opened the door to your bedroom, you were lying with your back to her in bed and she couldn't tell whether you were still awake or already asleep. She undressed quietly and then climbed into bed behind you.

"Honey?" She whispered softly as she leaned over to gently press kisses against your exposed shoulder. "Are you still awake?"

"Nope .." you made with your eyes closed and Mina laughed quietly.

You blinked against the darkness of the room as you turned your head to face her. Your girlfriend was hunched over you naked, looking guiltily at you. After staring at her for a moment, you reached out your hand to reach behind her head and carefully pulled the hair tie out of her hair. Long red hair fell down her face and the ends of her hair tickled your cheeks.

"I'm done with everything now .." she whispered, smiling gently.

"Now is half past ten ..", your hand slid from the back of her head to her cheek to linger there.

"Now is a little bit late.."

"I know and I'm sorry .." she muttered and you could hear the regret in her voice. But a simple "sorry" wasn't enough for you anymore.

You sighed before you sat up and leaned against the headboard of the bed.

"Look, I know you have to work a lot, but sometimes it's just too much you know?"

Mina, who had also leaned against the headboard, nodded shortly before you continued.

"It's not about that the whole thing can't be healthy for you. I mean more us ... Although that might be a bit selfish, I know you love your work, but I uhm .. I don't know- you know, you work all the time and even on weekends and I know it's not your fault, but I just can't do this anymore..I'm sorry that I claim your affection so much, but I just need you and you have no time .. "

Carefully you looked over at Mina, who sadly returned your gaze.

"I'm sorry .." she whispered and grabbed your hand to pull you close to her so you could rest your head on her chest.

"I'll do better, I promise .."

"I know I'm no better myself .." you muttered as she began to comb through your hair gently.

"As a professor at this college, I have to work a lot too, but not until 10 p.m."

"I'll do better .." she repeated and you smiled before leaning over to press your lips against her cheek for a moment.

"That's all I want .." you pulled back and lay back on your side of the bed. Your girlfriend was not long in coming and lay behind you before she put an arm around you and pulled you back to her.

"What do you think if we go out after work tomorrow ..?" She whispered in your ear.

You hummed in agreement. "That's a great idea..".

"Yes?"

"Yeah .." you muttered with your eyes closed.

"Good night Mina ..".

"Good night baby .."

---------------

You slammed the car door angrily before turning around to stomp up the steps to your front door. You were angry. Very angry. After you hurried to get off work as quickly as possible, you drove to the restaurant where you had an appointment, only to wait an hour for someone who didn't come and now you drove back home and then to see Mina's car parked in the garage.

"Wilhemina fucking Venable .." you shouted as you opened the front door.

"How dare you humiliate me so much ..".

You ran to her workspace and as you expected she was sitting at her desk in front of her laptop and seemed to be working. Her brown eyes widened when she saw you angrily standing in the doorway.

"I'm so sorry ..", she stammered and got up.

"Oh of course you are .." you hissed with narrowed eyes.

"I called you 4 times while I sat in this stupid restaurant for an hour .. You can't imagine how embarrassing it was, the waiter felt so sorry for me that I didn't have to pay for my tea .. "

Your girlfriend stared helplessly at you.

"Like I said, I'm sorry, Y / N .. i was just so busy and then I forgot .."

"So do you admit you've forgotten? You know, at one point I thought you might be doing this on purpose because you think it's funny."

"I never could, I-", she began, but you raised your hand to silence her.

"The only problem is that you always do that .." you bit your lip.

"You promise me so often that you will spend time with me only to then skip it for your work .. Then just leave it straight away and I don't always have to make myself hopes, only to be disappointed ..".

"Y / N please .. I'm as good as finished .. We can still go somewhere and have dinner ..", she looked at you desperately, but you just shook your head.

"Just forget it, Mina .." you muttered before turning around to leave her workspace . She looked after you sadly before let out a frustrated moan and slumped back into her desk chair.

How could she have forgotten?

Reluctantly, she picked up her phone and dialed the directory assistance number like the night before.

"Hello, you are connected to Directory Assistance .." said the same soft voice as last night.

"Alice ..", Mina remarked and didn't really want to notice.

"Ohh you're the rude woman from last night .." Alice laughed on the other end of the phone.

"The one with the impatient girlfriend .."

"Now more likely the one with the hating girlfriend ..".

"What did you do wrong?", Mina could hear real concern in the woman's voice and that confused her. She didn't even know this woman.

"She's upset because I always move her for work .." she mumbled.

"It's not your fault if you have to work."

"Exactly! ..", Mina shouted loudly and was surprised by her own volume.

At the other end it was quiet and Mina noticed that the whole thing was more than just private right now. She cleared her throat just before continuing.

"Can you find out Leigh Chaplin's phone number for me?"

"Of course..give me a minute .." Alice muttered and Mina heard Alice tapping on the keyboard through the receiver. For a brief moment Mina thought about just hanging up. That call was quite weird and had taken on a very personal direction. But just when she really wanted to hang up, Alice began to dictate the phone number to her and she had to take notes.

--------------------

Mina had decided to make amends for what had happened a few days ago. The only problem was, whenever you had time, she couldn't. And once she was done with everything, you had to work. It was a never-ending cycle that dragged you both further and further down. And the worst part was that you both knew that and still couldn't do anything about it. She loved her work as much as you loved yours and neither of you would ever be willing to sacrifice your work for the other.

And yet Mina had decided to make it up to you and that meant for her to help you with saving time. That's why she was now at the city library to bring back the books for you that you had borrowed a few weeks ago. Actually you had your own little library in your house, because you valued books very much, but at some point all these books were read and you were both not people who read books again.

And as a college professor, you had a habit of researching books rather than the internet anyway.

Here she was now, hobbling her stick through the library building. Which turned out to be quite difficult as she was holding your books in one arm and then had to go through the big building with her stick. If she were to trip and fall, she would have no way of catching herself. Mina knew that this would probably never happen, but still she didn't like the feeling.

But of course it happened as it had to, as always in such situations. It wasn't Mina who fell, but it was one of the books that slipped out of the crook of her arm and landed with a thud on the wooden floor of the library. How much she hated that ... such situations were almost unbearable for her. Simply because it was embarrassing to know that because of her scoliosis she was unable to bend down to pick up the book herself.

She wanted to swear loudly, but she knew that a library might not be the best place for this. She poked her senselesslyn stick around on the book and tried to put it upright somehow, only to grab it. But it was useless. Of course it had to be the thickest of your books that she had dropped. Her stick seemed to be against it like a thin branch.

"Let me help you .." suddenly came a soft voice from behind her and made her flinch. Mina turned around and looked into the friendly face of a petite woman with light brown hair.

"Your book ..", the woman said when Mina didn't answer and pointed to it with an outstretched finger. Again Miss Venable didn't answer and just stared at the woman in front of her. She was 100% sure she had never seen her before, but her voice ... She knew that soft voice, she just didn't know where from.

Without hesitating for another second, the strange woman bent down and picked up the book.

"You are welcome ..", she smiled and put the book back in the crook of Mina.

"Thank you ..", Mina mumbled, still staring at the woman in front of her, confused.

"I'm sorry, but do we know each other?"

"I think I would know that..", the woman laughed and suddenly Mina knew who she was looking at.

"You're Alice .." she uttered. "Alice from directory assistance ..".

Alice's eyes widened.

"Then you must be the one with the impatient, hating girlfriend .."

Mina's pale skin turned red at the other woman's words and she began tapping the floor with her stick in an irregular rhythm, as she always did when she was nervous.

"I may have exaggerated a bit .." she muttered. "She doesn't hate me ..".

"Well, I'm glad .." Alice honestly smiled before she nodded at the books in Mina's arms with her chin. "By the way, you have a very good taste in books .."

Mina's gaze followed that of the woman in front of her and landed on the book that she had dropped.

"Oh..these aren't my books, my girlfriend read them .."

"So she has a very good taste in books ...".

Mina nodded briefly while she was still staring at Alice. The fact that she had actually met this woman was so weird that it couldn't be a coincidence.

"Uhm .. I should bring the books back .." she muttered and Alice nodded quickly.

"I can wait .." said Alice.

"So .. if you want .." she added quickly when she noticed Mina frown.

Mina narrowed her eyes while she could only stare again. Alice exuded such confidence and she was so kind, it was like she couldn't help but agree.

"Okay .." Mina muttered. "Just give me a minute ..".

Alice's eyes began to glow.

"Perfect .." she said, beaming. "I'll wait outside."

Mina nodded shortly before leaving Alice to return the books.

"Where is your car?" Mina asked Alice as she stepped out of the library.

"Oh uhm I came here on foot .." Alice muttered and Mina frowned.

"It's getting dark .." she said curtly and Alice, who obviously didn't know what to do with that remark, nodded shortly.

"I can drive you home."

Mina studied Alice's face for any dislikes, but the woman just smiled again.

"That would be nice..".

Mina nodded again before going to her car with Alice.

"Well ..", Mina began after getting into the car with Alice.

"Where do you live?" She looked at Alice from the side, who was desperately trying to put the strap over her blouse so that it wouldn't crease.

"Uhm..Woodhill Avenue ..", the woman mumbled when she was finally satisfied.

"You can't be serious ..", Mina stared at Alice, not sure whether to laugh or be upset. "We live on the same street .."

"Oh really?" Alice's eyes lit up again.

Mina just hummed in agreement before starting the car.

For a few minutes they drove through the crowded streets and neither said a word. And although something like that was usually uncomfortable, at that moment it was actually quite pleasant, at least that's what Mina thought.

"Actually we know the whole neighborhood, but I've never heard of an Alice, nor have I seen you ...", she said finally as she turned into the long street of Woodhill Avenue.

"Well .. actually I don't live there .. I think I told you that I separated from my husband and since then I've been living with my daughter ..", Alice explained and Mina didn't even need to look at her to see how the woman was uncomfortable with the topic.

"I'm sorry .." she said curtly.

"Oh no .. you know, I'm happy the way it is now, at least I'm happier than I was with Buck a few months ago ..".

Mina didn't know what to answer, so she decided not to say anything again.

"Do you know the people who live in this house?" Alice suddenly asked and pointed to the building that Mina referred to as her home. "Venable and Y / L / N are their names .. My daughter told me that everyone is afraid of them .."

Mina stared at Alice and when she realized that the woman was serious, she started to laugh.

"Is it really that bad that everyone is afraid of us?", Mina said and couldn't help but grin as she watched the eyes of the woman next to her widen.

"Wait..I- you live in the house with your girlfriend?" Alice stammered and Mina nodded.

"I'm so sorry ... God ..this embarrassing .."

Alice buried her face in her hands and stared between her fingers at the house where you lived with Mina.

"Well, it's a nice house ..", she muttered, trying to get out of this situation somehow. Mina just snorted in amusement before continuing down the street with the car.

"Which house does your daughter live in?"

"In the green one over there .." Alice muttered and Mina's eyes landed on a green low-rise building.

"Ohh your daughter is Evangeline ..", Mina remarked as she parked the car in front of the house.

"You know her?" Alice sounded confused.

Mina nodded.

"I've never really spoken to her before, but I know her .."

"Okay .." Alice frowned before reaching for the seat belt to unbuckle her.

"That's when I notice, I don't even know what your name is ..".

"Miss Venable .." Mina said curtly and bit the inside of her cheek.

"uhm..or Wilhemina .."

Alice smiled.

"Well, then thank you, Wilhemina, for taking me home .."

"Good Night, Alice ..", Mina muttered and had to smile again.

"Good Night .." Alice repeated before getting out of the car and disappearing into the green house. And Mina couldn't help but stare after her.

In her mind, for whatever reason, she was back on the day the two of you had met in the flower shop where you had been working at the time. Even then, she had wanted to smile all the time.

When Mina finally stood in front of the house for a few minutes and finally decided to go home, she felt nothing but guilty feelings and she did not know who these feelings were for: Alice, because Mina had let her go or you, because she felt exactly the same  things right now as she did when you and Mina first met.

----------------------

It was Saturday evening and Alice was on her way to the house of the interesting woman she had met in person a few days ago. Somewhere she had a guilty conscience, as it was already 10 p.m. and it was probably impolite to disturb Mina so late, but she really wanted to see Wilhemina again and at the same time she really wanted to get to know you.

She stepped onto the site of your house and hesitantly raised her hand to the bell before finally pressing her finger against the little button.

When two minutes later still nothing had moved, Alice actually wanted to turn around and go home, but then she remembered that Mina probably needed longer due to her stick and that's why she stayed. And actually a few seconds later an angry looking Mina opened the door for her.

When Alice saw Mina's angry look, she was afraid for a moment that she had more than just disturbed, but when Mina recognized her, her look softened.

"Alice .." Mina uttered happily and Alice could see the woman in front of her trying to suppress a smile, which she failed.

"Uhm..I hope I'm not bothering .." Alice gave Mina, who quickly shook her head, a bright smile.

"No .." said the woman, her face serious again. "How can I help you?"

"Uhm well, I've got something for your girlfriend .." Alice muttered as she reached into her pocket to get the book out before she passed it to Mina.

"I saw on Thursday that your friend had checked out the first part .. I thought she might want to read the second part too .. It doesn't exist in the library .."

"Oh that's nice ..", Mina picked up the book.

"But unfortunately she's not at home all weekend because of a seminar .."

Alice frowned

"Are you sure you're the one who transfers his girlfriend because of work?" She asked and watched Mina just shake her head.

"I think you have a completely wrong picture of her ..", Mina muttered and chewed her lower lip.

"Isn't that important either, do you want to come in?"

"Sure .." Alice nodded quickly and started smiling again.

When Mina led Alice into the living room, Alice couldn't help but be impressed. The walls of the great room were lined up with full bookshelves sorted in alphabetical order. A large chandelier hung from the ceiling and was not switched on because a fire was burning in a large marble fireplace. In the middle of the room was a large dark red carpet on which a dark wing chair, a couch made of the same dark fabric and a square wooden table with short table legs stood.

Alice's gaze caught on the wing chair Mina had obviously been sitting in, before Alice rang the bell. A blanket lay untidy on the seat, covered with an open book and on the table was a half-empty glass with red wine. On the edge of the glass Alice could see traces of Mina's dark lipstick.

"Excuse the chaos, please ..", she heard Mina say behind her. Alice let out a low snort.

"Chaos .." she repeated mumbling and turned to Mina. Except for the few things on the wing chair, the house seemed to have been furnished down to the last detail.

"Do you drink wine?" Asked Mina, clutching her stick with both hands.

"Sure." Alice replied curtly.

"Red or white?"

"White, please ..".

"Well, then wait here for a moment ..", Mina said before turning around to leave the room.

Alice looked after the woman briefly before going to the dark sofa to sit on it. She sat there for a moment, but then the pictures on the mantelpiece caught her eye and she got up again to walk to the fireplace to take a closer look at the pictures.

All of the pictures showed Mina and a woman Alice was unfamiliar with, but Alice was smart enough to say that it was you, Mina's girlfriend.

And she noticed that Mina was right when she said Alice had the wrong picture of you. You didn't see at all like someone that could be impatient or strict. All these pictures showed you laughing honestly, with a cocky twinkle in your eyes. And of course Mina, who, as always, tried to suppress her smile. Alice grinned at the thought.

Each picture showed a different moment, presumably dates or vacations and all in one, Alice thought that you and Mina looked cute together, at least in the photos.

"So you've already discovered Y / N's altar .." mumbled Mina, who suddenly appeared next to Alice.

"Oh yes .. It's cute ..", Alice said and took the glass of white wine, which Mina held out to her before she mumbled a little "thank you".

"I think it's rather cheesy, but it was her idea ..", Mina stared critically at the pictures and for a few seconds neither said anything.

"She's pretty .." Alice finally remarked and Mina just nodded.

"She is.."

Alice's gaze wandered carefully from the pictures to Mina, who was staring sadly down at the pictures.

"You know, I think this is what I like the most .." she suddenly mumbled and tapped an actually inconspicuous picture with her finger. It showed you both in your winter coats squinting your eyes against the flash of the selfie camera. It was also pretty blurry.

"I know it's nothing special .." Mina explained. "But the moment behind it was special ... It was New Year's Eve last year and shortly before midnight we climbed onto the roof of the skyscraper in which she lived at the time, to watch the fireworks from there. I remember exactly how she was angry when I forced her to come on the roof with me .. it was pretty cold ..

But I wanted it to be special when I propose to her .. "

Alice's eyes widened.

"Are you engaged?"

Mina shook her head and smiled sadly.

"We were engaged .. but she broke off the engagement three months ago until .. until things were settled .. You already know how complicated everything is at the moment .."

Alice looked worriedly into Mina's sad eyes before slowly nodding.

"I understand .." she said softly.

"You know, I really love her, but it's just so weird .." Mina pinched the bridge of her nose. "I met her a couple of years ago in the flower shop she worked and earned next to nothing and actually had a shitty life, and now she's been working as a professor for a college for a few months and is finally happy with that... and that is great, don't get me wrong, but we hardly have no time for each other, because now she also has to work long hours ... and it's like she pretends that it's all my fault .. "

"I'm sorry .." Alice muttered before stretching out her arms and pulling the woman into a hug. Alice felt that Mina was uncomfortable when she lay tense in her arms, but when she wanted to withdraw, Mina quickly put her arms around Alice and hugged her back. Alice put her head on Mina's shoulder and inhaled the woman's lavender perfume. They stayed that way for a few minutes, until Mina finally cleared her throat and withdrew.

"M'sorry .." she muttered without looking at Alice and Alice could see the tear marks on her face.

"We shouldn't talk about this anymore .."

Alice nodded quickly. "If I got too close to you, I'm sorry .. "

She followed Mina, who sat down on the couch and sat with enough space next to her.

"Now that you've heard my shit, I'd love to hear yours .." Mina said, giving Alice a subtle sideways look. Alice blinked a few times and thought about it for a moment. Actually, she didn't really know the woman and a divorce is not really a pleasant topic for an evening like this, but a few seconds ago Mina had stood in her arms and cried, so what was wrong with it?

"Uhm .. so I've been divorced for 2 months ..", she began and for the next two hours she told Mina the whole story with Phyllis Schlafly, the E.R.A. and that Houston had somehow opened her eyes and she'd been working on directory assistance ever since. She told Mina about her children and that she couldn't believe she was a grandma. And then she told her about Buck and that for a few years she had wondered if what she had with him was really what she wanted the rest of her life to be.

To be honest, Alice wouldn't normally have been so talkative if it wasn't because of the alcohol. She usually didn't drink, so a glass of Mina's expensive white wine was enough to get her drunk.

"You know, I only noticed now how bad that asshole was in bed ..." she laughed out loud and held onto Mina's thigh. "Well in any case our house belongs to him and I have to live with my daughter .."

Mina, who was just as sober as she was a few hours earlier, might have been a little overwhelmed by Alice's drunkenness, but somehow she found it incredibly cute.

"I'm sorry .." she muttered and Alice missed the worried look the woman was giving her.

"Yikes .." Alice suddenly made as she stared intently at the clock on the wall.

"Am I wrong or is it 14 minutes past midnight?"

Mina was shocked at her words and had to find out that it was actually that late.

"I should call your daughter, then she can pick you up ..".

"Oh let Evangeline sleep .." Alice waved her off.

"I can just sleep with you .. you know I like you, you're nice to me and don't treat me like the failure that I am. Even if you were pretty mean to me on the phone ..".

Alice grinned crookedly before leaning forward and dropping her head into Mina's lap. Mina winced and immediately got up to let Alice rudely fall back on the sofa. The drunk woman let out a low wail and looked reproachfully up at Mina.

"We should put you to bed .." she mumbled and pulled Alice into an upright position before she gently grabbed her arm and pulled her up the stairs with her.

"Uhm .. this is the guest room ...", Mina muttered as they stood in the door frame of the room. Alice stared into the beautifully decorated guest room, which was so much better than the sofa she'd slept on for months. But it wasn't what she wanted.

"You know, I can sleep with you..", she remarked and looked carefully at Mina, who seemed frozen.

"Okay .." Mina finally said before stepping out of the doorway and leading Alice into your bedroom.

A large king-size bed stood with its head against the wall and filled most of the room. One side of the bed faced the door. Alice' gaze ran to the bedside cabinet on this side of the bed and could see reading glasses, a pill box and a tube of some kind of cream next to a small lamp. She suspected that Mina slept here. The other nightstand was a lot messier. Unused kleenex were piled on top of each other while a pair of gold earrings lay on the lamp stand. On one corner of the cupboard was an empty glass, but it was definitely used. And then there was a big black hairbrush and either it was Mina's red hair that was caught in it or you had the same hair color as your girlfriend, which Alice found unlikely. On the wall next to this side of the bed was a large painting with some flowers on it. Alice's eyes wandered to a large ground plant that stood in the corner of the room. She noticed that she had seen beautiful flowers all over the house and she remembered Mina saying that you had once worked in a flower shop.

All in all it was a nice bedroom, but Alice only saw the best part when she had stepped completely into the room:

On the wall opposite the foot of the bed was a huge picture window, which allowed a view of the neighborhood and the beautiful night sky. That was the advantage if you didn't live in the city. Alice couldn't help but grin than her eyesremained hanging on the black grand piano, which crowned the bedroom on top of everything else.

"A piano in the bedroom?", She turned to Mina, grinning, who turned red for whatever reason.

"Y / N can play the piano and when I gave this one to her, she wanted it to be here ..", Mina explained and nervously began tapping the floor with her stick to a random rhythm.

"It's pretty cheesy, but you should hear her play ...".

Alice nodded quickly and put on a neutral expression again when she realized that Mina didn't like her grin.

"I imagine it would be nice to wake up in the morning and then hear the piano .." she muttered and looked back at the piano.

"Anyway ..", Mina said and held her stick tighter again.

"We're about the same size, you can have my nightgown if you want ..".

Alice turned back to her and gave the woman a grateful smile.

"That would be nice..".

Mina only nodded shortly before she left the room, only to come back a minute later in a lavender nightgown.

"I'm going to change in the bathroom while you can do this here ..", she explained as Alice took the nightgown and mumbled a little "thank you".

And less than 5 minutes later Alice, who was actually still drunk, was lying in bed next to a completely stranger and, like Mina, stared at the ceiling in silence. And yet she would have preferred nowhere and it was the first evening in weeks that she could fall asleep without any worries.

---------------------

Contrary to Mina's guess, the next morning hadn't been weird at all. Actually nothing special had happened, but Mina had been worried about Alice's drunkenness, but the woman had been kind as always.

And while everything was fine between Alice and her, she worried about what was between her and you. She felt incredibly guilty and could never have told you that a strange woman had slept in your bed. Mina knew that Alice was way too innocent to think anything about it when she and Mina shared the bed, but you didn't know Alice and you would never understand.

Miss Venable couldn't deny that the brunette had turned her head. Alice was so gentle, it was almost impossible to feel uncomfortable in her presence and Mina finally had someone who understood her and who showed her compassion.

And when you came home on Sunday night and she pushed you right against your front door to kiss you passionately, she did that not only to show you how much she had missed you, but also to prove to herself that she still loved you . Because she did, but what she felt when she saw Alice confused her feelings and it scared her.

It was Thursday afternoon and Mina was on her way home. She had tried again and again over the past few days to show you how much she loved you, but for whatever reason, that only made it worse. At least you just seemed to get a little bit more bitter every day, and she couldn't explain why.

Mina let out an aggressive growl when she sounded the horn because the light turned green and the idiot in front of her stopped driving.

She had got out of work late and now had to hurry to get home, even if she didn't really want to go there. You'd only be disappointed again because she was late again.

Nervously, she drummed her fingers on the steering wheel as she drove home as fast as she could. She was almost in your street when she spotted none other than Alice on the pedestrian path and automatically her bad mood had flown away. Mina stopped next to Alice on the side of the road before pulling down the passenger door window to see Alice's surprised face.

"Jesus Mina .." Alice exclaimed, clutching her chest.

Mina raised an eyebrow and grinned.

"I thought church mice dont swear ..".

"Actually, I don't swear either .." Alice stammered. "But do you have any idea how scary it is when someone pulls up their car next to you?"

"So am I someone then?"

"No .. but .. you know what I mean ..".

Mina nodded curtly before leaning forward to open the passenger door.

"I guess, you want to go home?"

"Oh yes ..", Alice smiled gratefully at Mina before climbing into the car.

"So how are you Mina?" Alice asked after they had driven for a few minutes.

"M'fine ..", Mina mumbled and was well aware that she was lying.

"Good to hear .." Alice said, sounding in as good a mood as ever.

"How did Y / N find the book?"

Fuck.

Mina bit her lip.

"So uhm..I didn't give it to her..Y / N doesnt know you were with me .. "

"Oh ..", uttered the woman next to her and didn't sound that happy anymore.

"I may not be allowed to interfere, but I think you should talk to her .."

"About what?" Mina frowned.

"About how you feel .. Tell Y / N that you feel misunderstood and make it clear to her that it is not your fault ..".

Mina didn't answer and concentrated on driving again.

"You know, communication is the most important thing in a relationship, so talk to her, I think that might help .."

Great, thought Mina and bit the inside of her cheek. Talking about feelings, that was exactly her thing.

She stopped in silence next to Alice's daughter's green house.

"Thanks, Mina ..", Alice mumbled and wanted to open the car door to get out, but Mina stopped her by locking the whole car.

Alice turned to her in confusion before Mina grabbed her by the collar of her blouse, pulled her close and pressed her lips against Alice's.

Alice let out a shocked whimper and Mina immediately withdrew.

For a few seconds both women stared at each other. Alice looked totally overwhelmed and horrified, while Mina slowly realized what she had just done.

Without a word she opened the car doors and not a second later Alice jumped out of the car before running into the house.

A few minutes passed and Mina didn't move an inch. She stared at the street in front of her, trying to understand what had just happened.

All she wanted was to solve the problems between you and her and now she had kissed another woman. Damn it.

She let out a loud scream and hit the steering wheel before leaning forward to lean her forehead against it. A few more minutes passed while she cried against the leather. She hated being so emotional, right now when so many feelings were boiling in her at the same time and she couldn't define all of these things.

After she had calmed down a bit, she took a few deep breaths before starting the car and driving home.

"I'm home, baby .." she called in a thin voice after entering your house.

"Oh, finally ..", she heard you sigh before you appeared in the hallway. Your usual smile faded when you saw her and you frowned.

"What?" Mina asked nervously and chewed her lower lip.

"You have lipstick on your face ..", your voice sounded dark and made Mina nervous.

"Oh .. it must be smeared .." she said and smiled shakily.

"This is not your lipstick .."

Mina's smile froze and she stared at you.

"So you're really having an affair .." you growled and she could see tears glistening in your eyes.

"What the- Y / N..No ..", Mina's voice faltered as she watched you turn around and pointed with your finger to follow you before you led her into your study.

"If you're not having an affair, what is that ..", you opened one of your desk drawers and put a white lace bra on it.

"I found it under our bed and it can't be yours .. you're not wearing white underwear .."

Mina stared at Alice's bra hanging on your finger.

"Okay, how long?", You looked at her piercingly.

"I uhm- We dont-" Mina struggled for words and clung to her cane.

"You just can't be serious .." you yelled. "All I want is your affection and while I give everything to hang out with you, you fuck someone else?"

"I'm not having an affair, Y / N ..", Mina tried to calm you down and held up a hand.

"Oh, then explain to me why I find strange underwear under our bed and why your face is such a mess .. You know, you could have at least tried to hide the whole thing ..".

"Please let me explain ..", Mina chewed her lower lip and briefly considered what to say.

"Well I know you from the directory assistance ..-"

"Ohh, phone sex..",  you interrupted her and raised an eyebrow.

"What the hell, no y / n ..", Mina hissed.

"It turned out that she lives in the neighborhood and then she was here on Saturday and slept here, more not .."

"More not? Are you kidding me?", You spat and ran your hair through. "You let this stranger sleep in my bed and you don't tell me about it? .."

Mina didn't know how to answer it, so she just kept silent.

"Did you have sex?" You asked as you crossed your arms and chewed your lower lip.

"She never could, she-"

"Okay, I'll ask differently ..", you pinched the bridge of your nose.

"Did you want to have sex with her?"

Mina stared at you with wide eyes. In her mind she traveled back to Saturday night when she had been lying in bed next to Alice and staring at the ceiling. She remembered it well, how disgustedt she was of herself, but all she wanted to do at the moment was bend over the innocent woman to do the dirtiest things to her. Things Alice didn't even dare to dream of. All she wanted was to hear the desperate whimpering of the women and how she shouted her name.

But Mina could never have done that, partly because her loyalty was yours and partly because Alice was far too innocent for something like that.

"Wow .." you mumbled when she didn't answer.

"And then that bitch kissed you today ...?"

"Don't call her that ..", Mina defended Alice. "And besides, I kissed her ..".

"Oh..That's even better ..." you screamed as tears ran from your eyes.

"Congratulations Wilhemina, something like that is called an affair ..".

Angrily you threw the bra at Mina before you ran past her back into the hallway. Mina followed you and watched sadly as you packed your handbag with simple things.

"I'm going to see my mother .." you explained without looking at her while you put on your jacket. "I have to think about a few things ... I have no idea how long I'll be gone ... I also have no idea if I'll ever come back ...".

That was the last thing you said before you ran out of your house and left her with all the guilt.

-----------------------

You spent three weeks with your mother. Three long weeks of thinking about everything that had happened. You loved Mina so much, and the fact that there was probably someone else almost killed you. And actually you hadn't meant to come back to her, no matter that all your things were still in her house, but you were too scared that you would then have to see how she got over you and went on with her life.

After all, it was your mother who persuaded you to go to Mina to talk to her.

And now you stood in front of the door of your house and at least from the outside it looked exactly as you had left it. You bravely raised your hand to the door to knock gently on it.

And when Mina opened the door a minute later, you couldn't help but stare at her. You thought you looked like shit, but Mina topped it all. The actually proud woman was just a pile of misery when she opened the door for you that day. The red hair curled untidily over the fabric of her pajamas as she trembled on her stick. She was obviously in pain and probably hadn't taken her pills, something you usually reminded her of. You looked carefully into her face, which seemed even paler than usual, and noticed how she squinted her eyes against the sunlight, she didn't seem to have left the house for a long time.

For a moment you both stared at each other and you felt guilt creep up inside you.

"Can I come in?" You finally asked and looked carefully into her cloudy eyes that were staring down at you. Mina nodded slowly.

"It's your home ..." she muttered before stepping out of the doorway and hobbling into the living room. Without hesitation you ran after her after the door had closed behind you. You sat down next to Mina, who was staring into the empty fireplace, on the couch and also stared at the fireplace, but your attention was focused on the photos on the mantelpiece.

"You didn't take your pills .." you mumbled and she just hummed in agreement.

"..uhm, how are you?" you tried again before carefully looking at her from the side.

"M'great .." she muttered.

"Okay.."

"And how are you?" She asked while she was still staring into the fireplace.

"I'm great too."

Mina snorted.

"So we're both liars."

You ignored her comment and got to the real reason you came.

"Okay Mina, uhm i dont know- So about this woman .. I don't know what you had or just didn't have with her ..-"

"I had nothing with her ..", she interrupted you with a growl.

"You understand that I can understand that pretty badly?", You bit your lower lip and watched as Mina shook her head.

"I think you should get to know her .." she muttered and you frowned.

"So are you still in contact with her?"

Mina shrugged her shoulders.

"You should get to know her," she repeated.

"Okay .." you raised both hands in surrender. "Tell me when and where and I'll be there ..".

"Are you coming home then?" She whispered as she finally turned away from the fireplace and her injured eyes met yours.

"I .. I don't know ..", you stammered. "Please let me get to know this woman first .."

Mina nodded just before she got up and left the living room.

"What are you doing?" You called after her, confused.

"I'll call her .. "she muttered.

Your eyes widened.

"She's not coming here now, is she?"

"No ..", Mina called from the hallway. You didn't answer and after a few seconds you heard her talking softly to someone before she came back into the living room and stood in the doorway.

"You will meet her tomorrow in the café next to the library ..", she explained.

"Tomorrow I have to work late .."

"I know .." she said. "That's why you don't meet until 6 pm .."

"Okay .." you nodded briefly and stared at her for a few seconds.

"Uhm, I actually wanted to take some clothes with me .. For three weeks I've had to wear the shit my mother still had from me .."

"It's your home..", Mina replied shortly as she again clutched her stick with both hands.

You jumped up from the sofa to run past her up the stairs. In your dressing room you quickly packed a few clothes in an old sports bag before you turned around and actually wanted to go again, but then the white bra of this woman caught your eye, which was lost in the window sill. You knew stuffing that stupid thing in your gym bag might not be a good idea, but you would do anything to break the owner of this bra, for something to do with your girlfriend.

You ran back down the stairs where Mina was waiting for you in the hallway.

"I should go now .." you muttered as she stared at you expectantly. She nodded sadly.

"Uhm..Can I hug you?" She asked quietly and looked at you carefully.

"uh..of course ..", you nodded slowly before suddenly finding yourself in her arms again. She hugged you so tight that you were afraid you would suffocate. Her red hair tickled your face and for the first time in three weeks you could inhale her lavender perfume while she clung to you like her life depended on it.

"I am so sorry ..", she whispered and you swallowed when you felt guilty again.

"I should go now .." you repeated and withdrew from her arms.

She just nodded before you stumbled to the front door.

"Uhm..Y / N ..", she called after you when you were already out the door. You turned back to her and looked at her questioningly.

"Yes?"

"Alice didn't do anything wrong, so please don't kill her tomorrow ..".

You nodded just before turning to go to your car.

Alice.

--------------

"Damn .." you cursed as you nervously stared at your watch.

18:23

You parked your car in the library parking lot and walked briskly to the café.

Your gaze wandered through the almost empty room. Two men were sitting at a table and playing chess, an old woman was sitting in a corner and drinking coffee, and then your gaze was fixed on the graceful figure of a woman who was sitting with her back turned to you. It has to be her, you thought as you stared at her hazel hair curled up on a pastel colored blouse.

You got a little nervous when you approached her from behind.

"Uhm..Alice ..?" You asked and the woman winced slightly before turning to you and staring into her friendly eyes.

"You must be Y / N .." she said with a bright smile and got up.

"Uhm..ja .." you mumbled with a frown before you sat down across from her.

"I'm sorry ..I'm late .."

"Oh its okay .." Alice waved her hand before she sat down again. "Mina told me about your work .."

"Did she?", You looked at her confused and she just hummed in agreement.

You used the next few seconds to take in the woman in front of you and understood what Mina had meant. Alice looked so harmless and didn't fall into the category of the horny neighbor slut at all.

You cleared your throat and pointed with your index finger at the cup in front of you.

"What's this?"

"Tea," Alice said curtly. "She told me that you drink tea .."

The furrow on your forehead only got a little deeper as you pulled your eyebrows together a little further.

"She seems to have told you a lot about me .."

"I also know that you play the piano .." Alice replied, sounding kind of proud.

"She had to explain the piano in our bedroom .." you growled darkly as you remembered that this woman had slept in your bed.

"Y / N, she loves you .." she said and looked at you piercingly.

"I'm not sure about this.."

"Okay .." Alice sighed before starting to tell you the whole story from her point of view. How Mina had called her directory assistance late at night, how they met by chance in the library and how she ended up at your home on Saturday evening.

You listened to her attentively without interrupting her and with everyoneSentence made you feel a little worse because everything she said made sense.

"You must know, I never kissed a woman before and- you know ..." Alice muttered, staring at the table.

"And I thought it was a sin all my life and when Mina kissed me I wasn't really happy at first. You know, I was with her on a Tuesday two weeks ago to talk to her about it and she was really sad..- "

"Did she tell you she loves you?" You interrupt her.

"She-" Alice's voice faltered. "She apologized and said she was confused .."

You stared at her in silence.

"I don't want to offend you, Y / N, but Mina feels totally misunderstood by you .. She tries to do everything right and you reject her .. As if it was her fault that she has to work so hard .. And even if she doesn't seem like anyone that gets involved with something like that, she feels totally terrible about it all .. You didn't see how she cried when I was with her that Tuesday .. "

You looked at Alice sadly when you understood what she meant.

"Damn I'm such an idiot .." you muttered, rubbing your hair.

"There's something else, Y / N .." Alice sat up straight before continuing.

"When I was with her on Tuesday, I kissed her again ..".

Her words made you freeze.

"You did what?"

"You already understand me .." Alice said, looking at each other nervously.

"Did she kiss you or did you kiss her?"

"I kissed her."

"Okay .." you frowned.

"She loves you .." Alice repeated, putting her hand on yours.

Tears stung your eyes.

"But she loves you too ..", you croaked as you felt warm tears running down your face. Alice reached out her hand to wipe the tears from your face.

"Maybe .." she said softly. "But you mustn't be mad at her for that, it's not her fault .. Mina and I don't have an affair or anything, she loves you too much for that .."

"And do you love her?"

Alice thought for a few seconds before answering.

"I don't know to be honest .. This is all new to me, if you get what I mean .."

You nodded slowly and thought for a moment about everything she had just told you.

"I uhm .. thanks for trying to explain everything to me .." you finally said.

The woman in front of you smiled gently before taking her hand back.

"I hope you don't hate me now or anything.."

"Oh no!" You shouted loudly. "You are really kind .."

"Thank you," Alice muttered, her eyes shining a little more.

You stared at her for another moment and you could totally understand that Mina found this little sunshine attractive.

"Uhm by the way .." you started and reached into your handbag.

"I uhm .. I brought your bra .."

You put the bra on the table and pushed it over to the woman.

"Thank you .." Alice mumbled embarrassed and blushed, which made you grin.

She was really cute.

And that was your first "date" with Alice. Although one would call this educational talk less than a date. That same evening you drove back home and by home you meant Mina and not your mother's house.

The following months were more than overwhelming for you, Mina and Alice. Mina and you both applied for less working time at your work, which you also received and you had more time for each other.

That wasn't what overwhelmed you so much, the problem was, that it was pretty difficult for all 3 of you to come to terms with how you felt about each other.

After all, Mina got along best with it because she was the one of you who had been confronted with it the longest.

For her sake you accepted her love for Alice and began to meet the brunette more often and at some point you had to find out that you too were hopelessly in love with Alice.

Alice struggled with it though. The mere fact that she was in love with one woman scared her and then there were two. It was pretty hard for her to put aside all of her lesbian advantages and what her church said about you. Fortunately, Alice's children had different opinions and were glad that their mother was happy again after the divorce.

You and Mina were a little afraid of Alice's extended family, but they had all been nice to you and there was almost nothing better for you than to take care of Alice's grandchildren.

It took a while, but finally Alice also managed to get rid of her inhibitions and give herself completely to you.

And sometimes when you wake up between the two of them, when Mina had her arms wrapped around you from behind and when Alice was cuddled with her head to your chest and you were wondering how all this was even possible, you were probably the happiest person on earth at the same time.

And all you needed for that was the little sunshine in your arms while the red hair of your beautiful protector tickled your face.

[peanut-butter-parkerxx]

he died his hair prank

peter decided to prank y/n by temporarily dying his hair silver..

pairing: peter x fem!reader

status: dating

peters pov

i finally found a way to get revenge on y/n and her stupid yet believable pranks, since she loves my brown hair so much, no i did not decide to cut it aunt may would literally murder me if y/n didnt so it before her, i decided to temporarily dye it silver but she doesnt need to know its temporary ;)

y/n/n and i decided to hang out in the evening since i told her i had to go run some errands for may, thankfully she believed  it, so now im on my way to go buy some hair dye....*nervous laugh*

i got the hair dye and i took all the stuff out spreading them on my bathroom counter, i decided to record this coz i dont think ill dye my hair again any time soon, plus it felt like i was filming a youtube video

"ok so i watched a couple of videos before this coz i dont wanna mess this beautiful gem up" i said reffering to my hair "im obviously not gonna bleach it, so lets hope my hair is light enough to show the dye" i prayed and attempted to put my hair in a ponytail and it looked pretty good, i watched how y/n does it on my hair everytime we do face masks but doing it for yourself is wayyy harder

*A/N: look at this cutie 🥰 anyways back to the story*

i dyed the side of my hair first getting the dye everywhere, thank god i took the bathroom rug out so it would not get stained, and then took the bun out and sectioned it

"dont let me down brad mondo" i whispered getting even more nervous than i was before i brushed the dye of the first section "i did it" i smiled proudly but then it hit me "i did  it, i did it, this part of my hair is silver! oh my god" i was panicking, what am i doing? this is a prank this is a prank its not real calm down peter

suddenly i got a facetime call from y/n

*babyyyy 💕👀 would like to FaceTime*

lit up my screen, i panicked a bit trying to find an excuse to not answer the call or at least not show her my face, but i remembered i was in the bathroom....hopefully this excuse will work

i clicked on 'accept' and waited for her to connect

"hey babyyyy" she beamed, shes cute when shes excited but her smile faded when she couldnt see me "where are you?" she asked

"im in the toilet babe, but i couldnt not answer your call" i laughed trying to act normal and backing up from my phone as much as possible

"oh" she laughed, i wanted to grab something from the counter and i thought i did it carefully but what she said, said otherwise "wait why is your hair silver?" she asked her eyes widening

"wHAT? what do you mean?" i squeeked, i hesitantly put the undyed of my hair to the frame and she sighed in relief "my hair is brown, love nothing to worry about"

"thank god, although you kinda looked like jack frost which was kinda hot....but no no no no i prefer brown, dont even think about it" she warned, i laughed at her statement, it kinda made me more confident, maybe i would look like jack frost "anyways, ill see you in a few, im almost at my house, gotta go, byeee" she said waving her hand at the camera

"byeeee" i put my hand in the frame and waved, she laughed and ended  the call...that was close

after a few curses and an hour of dying my hair, i finished! and im pretty proud of the results, lets just hope my hair doesnt fall out

*A/N: this is the only picture i found of a guy with a somewhat wavy hair so imagine this is him but with messier hair dye and its all over his hair but not till his roots, OH and silver lmao*

so i took a photo of my hair and sent it to ned, he was with me throughout the whole process coz i needed someone to talk to, i usually annoy y/n with my daily rants but i couldnt so ned had to hear me talk abt how Mrs Barbosa gave me extra homework for being late

After I texted Ned, I got a text from y/n/n

"Babyyyy 👀💕: hey Pete, where are we hanging out? My place or yours?"

I told her that she could come to my place because I got a 'surprise' for her, i knew i had to record this so i quickly placed my phone on the desk

"YOUR BITCH HAS ARRIVEDDD!" y/b barges in, flopping on the bed next to me

"h-hey y/n/n" i said laughing at her dramatic entrance but still confused on how she didn't  notice my hair, just act casual, she moved closer to my body looking at the computer thats on my lap

"what are you doing?" she asked curious "

oh nothing, just watching guys surprise their girlfriends with dying their hair a bad color"i laughed acting as casual as possible

"oh thats funny, but if you did that to m- *looks up* *big dramatic loud gasp* PETE- I- WHA- HOW-" her eyes were as big as ever, I've  never seen her this shocked "WHAT HAPPENED TO MY LUCIOUS BROWN CURLS" she shouted completely ignoring my computer and sits on my lap to get a closer look

"YOUR curls?" i laughed

"yes MY curls what happened to the light brown almost hazel in the sunlight curls?" she brushes my hair through her fingers trying to get the dye out "i dont think my brain processed this yet- WAIT YOU DYED IT RIGHT? SO THAT MEANS IT'LL STAY FOREVER?" looked down her mouth parted

"isn't  that what dying your hair means?"

"HOW ARE YOU SO CALM ABOUT THIS I MEAN ITS A WHOLE DIFFERENT COLOR, AND WHY SILVER-ISH GREY?"

"I actually really like it" I said combing my hair through my fingers but she swatted it away so she could look at it more

"babe *laughs* you said I'd look like Jack Frost" I told her tilting my head

"well Jack Frost is hot but you're hott-ER I don't want you looking like Jack Frost because I said so! I love you for who you are....especially your brown hair"

"so if I told I like it you'd be ok with it?"

"Yes if you like it and it's your choice? %100"

"so what if I said it's a prank?" She was gonna nod her head coz she thought it was like the other question but then stopped midway and widened her eyes

"your kidding"

"yes in fact I am" I laugh and point at the camera and she gasps

"you..you....YOU BITCH" she punches my chest jokingly "I ALMOST GOT A HEART ATTACK AND GOT ALL SAPPY AND MUSHY FOR YOU JUST SO YOU COULD PRANK ME?!" she shouts point her hands everywhere "You know I was like scared! Coz you said you liked it and I was like, oh no I gotta get used to this no more chocolate curls, but not as in i lied I just gotta get used to it which added more pressure than I already felt!" She stated but I only laughed even more and awed

"babe don't worry"

"I HAD A MATH QUIZ TODAY" she point at herself "AND YOUR HERE LAUGHING YOUR ASS OFF?? no wait let me sit on the bed since you like when I sit on your lap"

"no no baby I'm sorry" I said while laughing, her face was hilarious

"no you're not! and no kisses till Monday" she huffs and looks at the wall, I give her ten seconds until she turns around to ask one more question, and she did

"hop on the shower we're cleaning the white of you, you Jack Frost wannabe" well more like a demand I huffed but got up with her and turned the recording off

"neds gonna love this"

Have a wonderful morning/afternoon/evening/night!

-quacksonlover

[commanderserwin]

just like him.

⤅ pairings: erwin smith x reader

⤅ genre: lil angst? and fluff!

⤅ count: 4.3k

⤅ request: Okay i kno now!! Can I request for an Erwin x Reader fic wherein Erwin didn't know he have a son (a carbon copy of him!!) with reader 'coz she hide it since she wants Erwin to focus on his dream and humanity. But one day Erwin knew about his son and confronted reader about it! Hahahahha its still about erwin tho well im called erwin simp anon for a reasoooooon!!!😂😂 Also i imagine levi be like "I didnt kno your pull out game is that weak" 😂😂😂 fuhck

⤅ a/n: for my erwin simp,,, yesh,,, here you go !!! i hope u like it!!!!!! mwa mwa mwa!! ♡♡♡

If you were being honest with yourself, mornings before were something of a rarity to you. Mornings were the evenings— the hours when you will be walking home, quiet footsteps through the creaking floorboards in the apartment building, the hurried fishing for the keys as you craved for your bed. Two years after, mornings were filled with tears and frustration as you listened to the baby cry from the other room, while you cried yourself because all you want is sleep. Still, you flung yourself off of the bed, lighting a candle instinctively as you padded towards the crib where the baby immediately stopped crying at the sight of you. 

Caz would coo at the feeling of your knuckles rubbing him on the cheeks while he nibbled on his fingers, his saliva getting everywhere on his pajamas but it didn’t matter to you. His blue eyes would calm you down, the tears of frustration gone as he babbled, his arms reaching out for you. He only wanted to be held, and you did so. You heaved him up, settling on the chair against the wall as you leaned on it. Caz held on to your shirt, immediately closing his eyes as he went to sleep holding you. 

Now, mornings were made for you chasing around that rascal as he ran for his life around the little apartment. 

Caz run his energy around, refusing to put on a shirt despite the great morning ahead. It was going to town day. He’s getting bigger, his clothes are getting smaller, his mittens are getting ragged, and his appetite is getting bigger as the days goes on. His heaving pants would be heard around the apartment as he finally settled on the small pile of toys. 

You knelt down in front of him, unfolding his tiny shirt before him, as he watched with a toothy smile. Caz avoided your attempts of holding him, but he still clutched on your shirt just like before. And with that, you have successfully clothed your son. 

“Fruits, new shirt, new scissors,” you listed as you inspected Caz’s long bangs as it covered his eyes. “Town day.”

“... day,” he repeated, snaking out of your hold as he played. 

“Town day, Caz,” you rubbed on his cheeks as he minded his own business playing with the same toys you have gotten him over the two years. He babbled as he played, completely tuning you out while you brushed your trousers clean as you stood up. “We’ll go to town, let me just clean up. I’ll get you a new toy.”

Caz squeal loudly at the mentioned of toy, making you tear up as you felt sorry for having him leave him to the same toys ever since. “Maybe two.”

When he didn’t answer, you bent down again to kiss his forehead. “I’ll be back.” 

The way to your room, or whenever you would be alone with yourself, you didn’t miss to think about him. 

Two years before, it was a simple night-out as you treated yourself over a drink or two at the secluded bar deep into town. You weren’t expecting people because as much as you would like to scream about a promotion, all you want to do is rejoice quietly as your hard work finally got you a raise. 

You weren’t expecting somebody to sit beside you, their voice low as they asked for a glass. You weren’t expecting to catch their attention as he introduced himself to you, his blue eyes capturing the way the waves in your heart crashed into yours, making your mouth run dry just at the sight of him. You weren’t expecting for him to talk to you all night, ideas bouncing all over, until he eventually made sure you got home safe as he walked you home. 

But what could a little tea as a way to say thanks would end up? 

It was the bodies tangled together, your legs wrapped around his waist as he hoisted you up against the door, his tongue entering yours, and like a hazy memory— it was the chests rising together, as he snuggled into the crook of your neck as he laid on top of you, riding out both of yours highs in a bliss while he whispered his name for the first time. 

“Erwin,” he whispered against your skin, kissing the spot just below your ear, “Smith.”

After that, you expected for him to know his way out— but he stayed. He danced his calloused fingers over your skin, memorizing every part of you as he whispered about his days and days before that. He would peck your lips, while he listened to you mumble about yours. His eyes captured yours so intently that you felt you would drown immediately. The night felt so surreal that it feels like you’ve known him since forever as he anchored you to sleep, to only wake up with a half-written letter of his name and where he was. 

The Survey Corps. 

As brave as he was to be soldier, the complete opposite is you being the absolute coward. 

“Erwin,” you whispered against the mirror as you buttoned up your blouse, glancing at his letter while you had it tucked on the edge of the mirror. 

Caz’s hard footsteps as he walked up the stairs snapped you out of your memories as the toddler helped himself stand up with the help of the door, as his blue eyes anchored you to reality. The same eyes and hair— of what haunted your past. Erwin Smith. 

“My darling,” you sighed as you heaved him up against your hip, as he clutched on your shirt, making your way outside of the apartment. “Town day? Right, Caz?”

Erwin would be lying to himself if he said he wasn’t looking for you. 

He has been. 

Always at the same bar— but always leaving empty handed with no trace of you. At one point, he fought with himself if he should retrace his steps that would lead him to your apartment. When he couldn’t get over you, still, he found the front of your apartment building yet he left empty-handed because you don’t live them anymore. Among the number of people who are traveling, he couldn’t oversee everybody else. 

Then his work has gotten demanding, more in need of him. Papers upon papers, ink bottles upon bottles, burnt out candles on his desk, made you just a sliver on his memory. Still, he has never craved so much for somebody else’s touch other than yours. He has never ached to hear somebody else’s voice but yours. 

Erwin could still remember the night like it was yesterday. He was so unaware of the feeling that pools in his stomach, as his heart beat faster while you spoke softly against the night, turning your head every once in a while as the moonlight shone through your thin carpets, painting over you. 

Despite being part of his memory, you eventually got pushed to the end, locking the memory of you as he focused on his work. 

Erwin walked aimlessly around town, making stops at the stalls where he thinks of what to buy. He isn’t looking for much, he just found himself wanting to go for a walk as he was too cooped in his office, his mind aching for a change of scenery. He watched the people walk, the children chasing each other as their screams filled the plaza with never ending glee. 

“Oh,” Erwin huffed as he felt somebody bump into his... leg. He felt their small hands clutch on to his leg as he watched the toddler help himself up. The little boy looked up, his eyes matching his own eyes, as he felt eerie about the situation. “What’s your name?”

The little boy only craned his neck up, moving backwards a little to see more of the tall man. Erwin did the child courtesy as he bent down, offering the boy a hand to shake. The boy only shook his finger, his whole hand clasped on Erwin’s as they locked eyes again. Erwin smiled at the strength of the kid’s grip on his finger as he asked, “Are you lost?”

“Caz.”

“Caz?”

“Me.”

“Your name is Caz,” Erwin said, brushing the kid’s pants as he stood up, holding the the little kid’s hand. “Where is your mother?”

They both stood there, looking at the people walking by, waiting for somebody to take the little kid. Erwin couldn’t help but glance down every so often to see the eerie similarities between the two of them. He knows that he isn’t the only man with blonde hair and blue eyes, but something about this child made the whole thing so familiar. Erwin looked down again, surprised that the kid was looking up— smiling, as he moved closer to Erwin’s leg. It felt too familiar, and he didn’t want to think of that one possibility because it will make him lose his mind. 

A child? His child? Or was it just a child who looks so much like him? 

It was a simple mistake. One look away from Caz and he’s off to run around the plaza, his laughter fading out while you focused on fishing out the wallet from your purse to see if you brought it with you. Your bag was filled with Caz’s toys because you know when it’s town day he wants to walk around with one toy, and one of his small towels because it’ll get hotter as the day goes by and you don’t want him sweaty, and one or two little pieces of bread just in case he gets hungry because he didn’t eat— and it makes you cry because you only looked away for one damned second and he is gone. 

“Caz?” You shouted, hurriedly walking towards the plaza where children were running around. “Caz!” 

You quickly assessed the children as you walked, but none of them were Caz. He’s blonde for fuck’s sake, and he’s wearing a dark blue sweater and he’s probably scared because he doesn’t like strangers and he could be crying— but, oh. 

“Oh! Caz!” You ran towards him, knowing from the back of his head that it was him because he stands a different way and your feet immediately rushes to him because you know it was him, and you’re correct. 

“I’m so sorry! I only looked away, and he was gone, and I didn’t mean to. I’m so sorry, are you okay?” You turned Caz around by the shoulders as he only smiled in response, letting go of the person’s hand as he clutched on your shirt, snuggling to the crook of your neck, while you brushed his hair. You glanced up to the man in a hurry, shame eating you, feeling worst. “Thank you! I… I only looked for one second, I… thank you.” 

Erwin couldn’t feel the ground underneath him as he glanced at the woman clutching the kid before him. It’s… 

“It’s you.”

You stopped brushing Caz’s back, finally hearing the person speak. How could you forget about that voice? You glanced up, sighing deeply as you looked at the man. Him. How could you forget about him?

“Erwin,” you whispered, standing up to heave Caz up to your hip. Erwin stared at the boy in your arms, then at yours. You watched his mouth open and close, while you nodded. 

Erwin moved a little closer, offering his hand against towards Caz with wonder if he… “Is he my son?” 

“His name is Caz,” you breathed shakily, nodding as you bounced him in your arms. You watched how Caz clutched Erwin’s hand, smiling once more. “He’s two years old… I… We…” 

“That night,” Erwin whispered, letting go of Caz’s hand as he stared at you. He doesn’t understand— he does understand, but why was it kept a secret. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

“I was scared,” you licked your lips, stepping backwards as you placed Caz back on his feet. You couldn’t meet Erwin’s blue eyes or else you’ll break down because this wasn’t how you wanted him to know. You didn’t even know if you wanted him to know. But you were thankful that it did happen— you were just unsure of how he’ll react. “I’m sorry.” 

“You could have told me,” Erwin ruffled Caz’s hair, smiling down at the boy. His smile went away when he looked at you. “I left you where I was and my name.”

“I know,” you whispered, clearing your throat. “I was scared.” 

Erwin understood. He was also scared. He is scared. He came to walk down the plaza with nothing but to just walk— and not to come back as a father. He realized why it was so familiar with Caz and how the kid stuck close to him because he might’ve understood too. 

Erwin nodded, fiddling with his hands. He has finally found you. And perhaps, he wasn’t meaning to see you like this, it was better than not seeing you ever. He looked at you, really looked at you, feeling his own mind click and heart thump faster. You must’ve been scared, taking care of him. You must’ve been tired— and he realized that by the bags under your eyes despite your smile as you cooed at his son. His. 

“Is it too late?” Erwin asked, patting Caz’s back to make him look at him. He watched you raise a brow, protectively turning around as you listened. “I want to be there.” 

“It will be nice for him to grow up with a father,” you said quietly. 

“Okay,” Erwin nodded, offering a hand to you. He doesn’t know why he did it, but he felt enormous pride in himself when you shook his hand. And it was like he’s back two years ago. 

How could he ever forget about you. 

He looked for you everywhere and you’re finally right before his eyes, plus one. 

Erwin smiled, loosening his shirt by the collar as he pointed towards town. There must be a reason why you were here, so he assumed you have to do something. 

“Should I join— may I join you two?” He asked, placing his hands inside his pockets as you nodded. 

“Town day-,”

“Town day!” Caz repeated, squealing as he jumped on his feet. 

“Town day,” you said, brushing Caz’s hair. “We were going to get some fruits, a new shirt for him, scissors to get his hair cut, and a toy. Some mittens too.” 

Erwin followed your steps beside him, watching you heave Caz up multiple times as you stopped by a few stalls to get what you needed. He stopped behind you, playing with Caz from behind as he reached for him multiple times— but you held on to him tightly. Caz smiled and babbled, while Erwin wiped his saliva away to not let it drop to your neck and shirt. 

“I’m just going to buy apples,” you turned around, catching Erwin in an act as he smiled widely. He cleared his throat, straightening himself as he wiped his hands on his shirt. He blushed slightly, while you only chuckled softly in return, “I’ll be back.” 

“Can I hold him?” 

You turned around, looking back at Caz and Erwin, while you thought to yourself. Should you? Should you give him to Erwin? He only moved closer, hands reaching for Caz while he squirmed out of your touch, immediately reaching for his father. 

“Hold on to his legs,” you instructed, brows furrowing as you held Erwin’s hand to position it over Caz. 

“I know how to hold a child,” Erwin cooed, bouncing Caz on his arms. Everything felt so natural to him, as he looked at his own son’s eyes— feeling the whole world into them. “I got it.” 

When Erwin watched you hesitate to go, he pushed you gently, suppressing his smile, “Go. We’ll be here.” 

Erwin followed you at that point, everywhere— carrying Caz in his arms as you stopped stalls by stalls, buying whatever Caz needs. 

“Get two shirts,” Erwin added as he watched you get one for Caz. He pushed one white sweater in your hands as you only stared at him. He knew you were going to protest as he scrambled to get his wallet but he quickly paid the merchant. “Buy one for you too.” 

“Are you telling me I have an ugly shirt?” You joked quietly, reaching for the merchant’s bag as he handed your toddler’s new clothes. 

“No! No! I...” Erwin scrambled to get his words right but you only squeezed his arm to get to calm down. Caz was peacefully sleeping on his chest, embarrassed that your baby’s sleeping too peacefully, now that there was a big wet spot on Erwin’s shirt. He looked at where you were looking, your cheeks tingeing in embarrassment, “It’s okay, he’s sleeping.”

“I was joking,” you smiled, pulling him towards the next stall— Caz’s favorite stall. The toys section. You turned around, walking towards the both of them, going on your toes to reach up to Caz. He snuggled closer to Erwin, his eyes fluttering open to look at you. “My darling, let’s go buy your toy.” 

Immediately, Caz squirmed out of Erwin’s arms as he kicked his legs making Erwin grunt as he placed his son back to the ground, watching him ran gleefully to the stall while you followed quickly. Erwin caught up, going behind you as you bent down to help Caz pick. Erwin felt like he wanted to buy every single toy as Caz graced his toothy smile towards everything he has laid his eyes on. 

“What does he want?” Erwin asked quietly beside you, pulling your hair behind your back as you whipped your head towards him.

“He likes everything,” you smiled at him, shrugging at Erwin while he chuckled. 

“That’ll be a problem.” 

Both of you watched Caz pick toys out, finally buying him with more than you wanted as Erwin paid for the extra two you promised to buy Caz. Erwin clutched Caz in his arms as he carried a bag on the other, as you lead him towards the new apartment that was just close by. Erwin couldn’t believe that you lived here when he has been walking by the building numerous times trying to look for you. He shook it off, finally realizing that you’re here now. 

“It’s up here,” you motioned upstairs, finding for the key as you walked up the stairs. Erwin bounced the sleeping Caz on his arms again, following you up the stairs. “You got it?”

“Yes,” Erwin whispered, stopping behind you as you pushed the door to welcome him to the apartment. He saw the pile of toys in the middle, few books together while you placed the bags on top of the table while you arranged them. “Where should I put him?”

“Caz is still sleeping?” You whispered, taking off of your shoes as you closed the door behind him. Erwin placed the bag on the floor, bending down to show you his sleeping son. “I’ll have him.” 

“Can I?” Erwin asked quietly, as he stared down at you. He watched you finally relax with the thought of him carrying Caz as you nodded. He listened to you point where and what blanket he needs to sleep— even the toy Caz wants to sleep with. The smallest things you know about your son and he wants to know every single detail. 

Once he got Caz on his bed, swaddling him with his blanket and placing the toy around his arm, he quietly exited. He stood in the middle, unsure of what to do next— but he wants to do more. He watched you flit towards things you needed to fix, the cushion and the sheets, and the new things from town. 

You didn’t realize he was helping you when you felt him pass by you, a hand on your back as he helped. You tucked your hair behind your ear, “It’s okay. You don’t need to help...”

“Let me,” Erwin insisted, quickly catching on the things you were doing. 

Both of you moved quietly, stopping when the floors would creak, and both of your chuckles echo in the living room as he stepped on that same spot. The kettle whistled in the kitchen, and you hurriedly stepped towards it with Erwin following softly. 

You leaned on the countertops, breathing deeply now that you have him alone. You turned your head to him when you felt his hands on your shoulders, massaging gently making you close your eyes. You clutched on his hands, turning your whole body around as you stared at him. 

“I’m sorry,” you apologized again, sighing, as you clasped your hands together. “I should’ve looked for you.” 

“I looked for you,” Erwin mused, pulling away as he sat on the dining chair, watching you grab two mugs from the cabinet. “I passed by this building so many times, not knowing that you lived here.” 

“You must’ve not look well,” you snickered, pouring out the tea before him. You pulled on the chair before him, sharing a cup of tea with him. 

Just like before. 

Erwin smiled as you leaned on to the chair, your hand tapping gently on to the table. He reached for your hand, pulling on your finger as he looked for your attention. He wants this, he wants sitting down on the table, feeling a different kind of exhaustion from chasing his son around, he wants sipping his tea, hushed conversations to not wake the small human next door. 

“Caz found me.” 

You couldn’t help it. 

You remembered Erwin as someone who is serious, just like two years ago— and yes it was just one night, but you didn’t expect him to say that. Even Erwin looked embarrassed and you only curled your fingers with his, tugging on his hand as he hooked his on yours. He tried to squint his eyes at you, hiding his smile and the laughter erupting from his chest but you were the one to boom. 

Your laughter colored the room, hand muffling your lips as your chest shook while Erwin grinned, nibbling on his lip as he watched you become a laughing mess before him— blushing as how corny it must’ve sound like, and from the corner of his eyes, he watched Caz clutched the blanket and his toy as he rubbed his eyes wondering what the commotion was all about. 

Caz walked beside you, holding your hand and his toy as the base intimidated him. He knew that he was supposed to be serious, so he placed his big boy scowl as he watched the big soldiers walk pass him, waving their hands at him— but he didn’t break. He did, and he hid in embarrassment from the attention. 

You were looking for Erwin. It was your first time in the base once Erwin found you months ago, and you finally found the courage to look for him. It was supposed to be a surprise, but you have been walking around for five minutes, unsure of where his office might be. 

“Oh! Excuse me,” you tapped their shoulder, their whole body turning to see who owned the unfamiliar voice. “Do you happen to know where Erwin’s office is?”

“Erwin?” The small man in front of you, glanced down at the child who was smiling at him. The black haired man found it himself to smile back as small as it is, as you watch his eyes flutter towards your son and yours. His grey eyes blinked, surprise coloring his face for a hot second. 

“Yes, Erwin Smith?” You explained, holding Caz’s hand in comfort because you were scared. “I... We got lost, so...”

“Just down the hallway. His door’s the third on the right.” He explained, crossing his arms as he watched the boy cooed on your leg. 

“Great, thank you,” you nodded, smiling nervously as you followed his instructions. You turned to the hallway, and immediately regretting it. You turned around, stunned that the man is still staring at you, “I forgot to ask your name!” 

“Levi,” he said loudly, making sure it reaches you. 

Levi pursed his lips, the cogs in his head working as he put two and two together. He looked more at the smaller human next to you, amazed at how much he looks just like Erwin. 

“Thank you, Levi!” You called out, tugging on Caz’s hand softly as you walked towards the hallway. 

Once you two reached his door, you bent down to Caz, fixing his shirt while he tapped on the wooden door. 

“You have to be quiet, okay,” you whispered, kissing your son’s cheeks as he squirmed away, hurriedly reaching for the doorknob. “It’s a surprise for your father.”

It was far from quiet as you knocked on Erwin’s door, and hearing his response. 

It was far from it. 

Caz squealed right away, screeching for his father as Erwin pushed his chair away, quickly bending down to meet his Caz’s reaching arms, blowing raspberries into his chubby cheeks as he clutched on to his shirt. He heaved him up to his hip, kissing his nose as Caz found glee in touching his father’s cheeks— stretching them while Erwin turned to you. 

You laughed at the scene, walking up to them, squeezing Erwin’s arm as you reached for him. Your lips found his, despite how funny he looked, courtesy by his own son. Still, Erwin kissed you back, placing an arm around your waist to pull you closer to him. 

Erwin wants this. His heart swelled at the thought of you, relishing how good the last few months were with you. He wants this, and he’s thankful that you let him.

It was his turn to laugh. He opened his eyes, pecking your lips as he muffled his laughter with your lips. He couldn’t believe what came out of your mouth, as you kissed him back and your son in his arms while Erwin tugged you any closer.

“Found you.”

[busanlove9597]

im the same long anon , yeah, being an asian n queer equals hell . ive already said it in tumblr before. here in our country, all most all of bisexuals wont even comeout coz if they can be in a 'normal' relationship assigned by society why should they take risk. we have very few gay people who are actually out of closet. sometimes i think our country is more queerphobic than korea. here being queer = joke, sexual immorality , disorder. at the same time we have more transgender people who are living as prostitues or leading life like in hell. sad but a very clear reality here. coming to km,for me,JK is the very clockable unless u r stereotyping him. i think jk didnt knew at first coz i dont think he took his crushes in 14/15 yrs too serious to be sign of homosexuality. most of the things we do at first comes unconsciously like checking out same sex people etc or having those crushes untill we gradually understands ourself better,most of us even date opposite sex people n reaches a stage like jk was in , where u dont think there is any diff b/w dating or not , not feeling love in a relation , too bored to spend time with that person that u r happily saying u didnt met the person u are dating even its been 200 days ,dont understand the hype for opposite sex(grapes are better than girls lmao),everything we can find in 2013-14 jk. otherwise he knew he likes men , dont want to accept for himself, teasing or pushing away "a person" coz that said person is making u feel someway which u dont want to accept or happen,which all maybe due to internalized homophobia. but in anyway major progressions can be seen in jk in 2015-17, not as km but jk as a person. for jm , i really dont know , he's my bias , major part of me thinks he accepted himself but didnt want others to know ??? i couldnt think of many stances where i think jm was struggling to accept his sexuality. i think he was struggling more with his presentation , to be strong man fearing wt 'others' will think about him . anyway im more than happy for them if they r a couple coz considering their profession n country they live in they could find each other , came out many fears n living their trueself . ys in reality their lives wont be fairytale we like to imagine(to those who think they r 24/7 happy with each other) they both had gone threw hell before reaching here . still they are both working towards their " happily ever after " individually , as a couple or professionally . i just wish them all luck n happiness n strength for their future. OMG unpopular opinion became me making wishes. anyway thankyou

welcome back :) 

before i get into the main part of your ask let me just say that it hurts me to hear that this is the reality for so many ppl in our community, including you. it’s kinda absurd how divided our society is when it comes to basic human rights. and while this is so so cruel it’s important to highlight that being (openly) queer isn’t safe for everybody. i hope it will be one day, though, we still have a long way to go towards acceptance. with that being said, stay safe and take care of yourself ❣ 

btw this blog is a safe space for everyone (unless you’re a shitty person, that’s where i draw the line lol). 

anyway, you actually summarized my thoughts better than i could ever communicate so bless you. i think most queer ppl will agree that figuring out and coming to terms with your sexuality or gender identity doesn’t happen overnight and it was super fascinating to experience jk’s journey throughout the years. did anyone else see a bit of themselves in him? :D 

i actually agree with everything you’ve said about jk and jm so there’s nothing else to add. thanks again for stopping by and sharing your thoughts. you’re ofc welcome to come back any time! 

[dojae-huh]

Markhyuck dynamics So unlike most ppl I've always thought of them as more like siblings than soulmates or best friends. Markhyuck have had issues and they are never shy abt talking abt them, although now the discourse is to hide stuff more then it was before they became as big as they are now. https://www.youtube.com/watch?app=desktop&v=B6w5jvtg1Bg&ab_channel=rasol

They had a bad fight in we young era and didnt talk to eachother for a few months but they just cleared it with it's a misunderstanding for fans in a new vlive. As for why they're more with other members, coz they're 2 grown ass men, they arent dependent on eachother for support like they were as kids. They still are the closet neos along with jeno other than jaedo or dotae. They personally remind me of dom and matt from muse, both are too close for outsiders but they both have their own friends circles and the spend alot of free time separate but are really close.  I've had a feeling for a while that the issue between doyoung and mark was caused due to a markhyuck fight. Doyoung did say that my opinions were different to urs, kind of thing in the video msgs and I believe doyoung defended haechan and he became the bad guy for supporting haechannie. As for them going out together, they're the couple that goes out the most and we see their pics of going out together the most too. Sometimes they're alone, sometimes with other members. Markhyuck are 2 ppl who have very different ways of handling things but coz they grew up together they become closer then others and still are very close. I guess the fanservice has stopped so fans think they're not as close now. Markwoo is pushed alot and yumark is pushed by mark alot. I agree with the anon that haechan guesses Mark's issues before anyone else and tries to make it seem not that big, he supports him alot and mark does the same for haechan. We usually also forget that mark is physically very clingy but the boy still talks in formal korean with the older members and keeps his distance in between them and himself. Haechan is emotionally clingy and gets the older members to respect him and also gets them to treat him like a baby when he wants to (free food and free drinks is a big example) I personally think markhyuck will always be friends even after nct is no more, the rest I've no idea. As for them being good now, they seem like they're back to good moments in their friendship so we'll see alot more cringe markhyuck. PS. Mark might act all annoyed but the boy always does what haechan tells him they're to do, be it swim in the ocean in Miami or play badminton in the new show

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gyYWKhsn6lg&ab_channel=rasol

Link, Link2

Thanks.

MarkHyuk worked well together during the Rainy day ep.

[cozyforjate]

MacGyver 4x13

So, lets talk about MacGyver season finale.  Now did i like it? Yes. It was a solid episode with great action. 

Was it the best episode of the season? Unfortunately no.

Its hard not to have big expectations from season finales. Especially when you have a season long arc you want it to end in a satisfactory way. Now i'm one of those who LOVED the Codex arc from the very beginning. But i didn’t really feel satisfied in the end. IMO we needed to spend more time inside the Codex world.  

I wanted to have more of Scarlett. But she had like 2 scenes and she died in one of them. Such a shame.

I'm soo dissapointed that Auntie Gwen died. And she died exactly the way James did. Poor Mac, he just cant have a break, can he? 

The only consolation for me is that Codex isnt done. Bcoz lets face it, you cant take down an organization that's been around for centuries by just stopping one nuke. Leland is still out there and hopefully we'll see him again. I think he was pretty scary and cool btw.  

While the heavily promoted showdown between Mac&Riley vs Russ&Desi was great and very well acted, it didnt live up to the expectations. They built up great tension, they created a believable conflict but then it all got resolved in 5 minutes. Russ was like "sorry for the gun in your face thing" and Mac's like "Whats a gun in the face between friends?". Resolved.

I understand where Russ’s coming from just like i understand were Mac’s coming from. But i guess i wanted to see them working on building the trust, working on the friendship. But maybe we will get that when the show comes back with new episodes. We’ll see...

MacDesi: 

When it comes to MacDesi, nothing really makes sense. I feel like this season the writers forgot their own writing and tried to retcon the story a few times.They did it again in the finale. 

We had a Desi, calling Mac compromised, telling "i knew it" the minute she realized Mac's gone rogue, saying "sometimes you just have to sacrifice the things you love" with a straight face, saying "Mac has to be stopped"... But in  this episode suddenly Desi was talking about how she TRUSTED Mac. 

Its always Mac's fault. Mac has to be the one who always need to apologize and take the blame. Even Russ said sorry, but not Desi. Never her.

And what was their last scene all about?

"I know you better than you think "

Of course she knows him! She knew Mac couldnt be compromised. She knew, that Mac always did everything for a reason. She knew he didnt have an evil bone in his body. 

Oh wait, that was Riley. Sorry.

Knowing someone doesn't mean knowing superficial things about them. It means knowing their heart, knowing their soul. And when you really, truly know someone, you trust them. You believe in them. 

One thing i'm glad about MacDesi scenes was that all the emotion (be it anger or concern) it came from Desi and not Mac really. All scenes were initiated by Desi. And Mac just let her. I dont know how long the writers are intending to keep this relationship going. One more episode, 2 more, 3? 

But i got a feeling that Mac now realizes this relationship can't last. He is truly sorry for hurting her. He cares about her. But they lack fundamental things such as trust, understanding, equality and compatibility.  

MacRiley:

So we didnt get big scenes with MacRiley in this episode. But i loved the ones we got nonetheless. So im gonna talk about each and every one of them!

What i love with MacRiley is that they're always in snyc. Riley says something, Mac comes up with an idea. Mac presents an idea, Riley improves it. They sense danger at the same time and take action like they planned it all along. They're the king and queen of improvising. Best team ever. And we need more of that in season 5!

Onto the scenes:

Loved how Riley sensed that Mac’s focus seemed a bit shaken and brought him back to his senses. "I need you to clear your head" "Yeah you're absolutely right"...  

Loved how Mac repeated that they were a "package deal". I guess he really enjoys it. We feel you Mac. We love it too!

Loved how he didnt want to be seperated with Riley but had to. And i loved how he ran to Riley to see if she's ok after the talk with Leland. 

Loved the scene in car. Mac turned to look at Riley when he said he jammed his phone under the ramp before he fell out of the truck. Riley smiled at him already tracking the signal.... Always in sync!

We got one “Riles” wohoo... Call me crazy but i love how Mac always thanks Riley even when its the smallest things like handing her tablet to him. This time he thanked her twice tho, when he took the tablet and when he returned it. LOOOL 

When the bomb went off and Mac wasn’t out yet, Riley quickly checked Desi. And it kinda broke my heart coz Russ and Desi were there and she felt like she had to hide her feelings. But the minute she saw Mac, she couldn’t stop herself and ran to him. That’s my girl. Loved how Mac rested his back on Riley's leg. Riley probably wanted to hug him but again Desi and Russ were there so all she could do was pat his shoulder.   

Russ giving MacRiley their badges back! LOOOL I bet he cut the badges into tiny pieces himself. And when Riley and Mac realized whats in the envelopes? They had the exact same reaction. Somebody please gif it side by side. 

[lovelysugawara]

His Cupcake

pairing: Sugawara Koushi x Reader

plot: One-shot: Sugawara is you husband.  **Y/N = Kumi**

Grammatical errors ahead. 

A/N: i just want to unleased what I imagined from long ago.  Enjoy guys. Sorry i don’t use y/n, I usually make up names. Enjoy.

As the sun rays touch your face, you slightly open up your eyes. Another day and another work for you. You sometimes wish to have a lazy day and be on the bed.

But as you look beside you, you feel refreshed. There he is, your husband. Sleeping peacefully. It's still 6 am and you think it’s early for him to wake up.

You started to cook breakfast.

You cook his favorite omelet when suddenly someone hugs you from the back.

“Ack-!” you jolt.

“Why haven’t you woke me up? I’m supposed to cook breakfast today, cupcake.” He nuzzles his face to your neck.

You smiled as he half asleep questioned you.

“But you stayed up so late last night, I know you need to rest, Koushi.” You touch his head and pat it.

He sighed.

“I’m not even a high school teacher but why am I doing their work?” he complains to you and he walks to get water from the fridge.

“Didn’t you promise to help them? It’s your fault for making a promise.” You reminded him of what he did weeks ago.

He once again sighed. “I just want a lazy day with you. Doing nothing. Or doing something.”

You giggled. “Well, we’re both caught up with our jobs. But for sure we will be free next week.”

You touch your neck and massage it a little, you feel stiff. Unaware of your husband’s stare.

He suddenly grabs your waist and hugs you once again.

“EH-!”

You suddenly blushed when you felt his lips on your nape.

And the next words he said really drive you insane.

He whispered to your ear, “I miss you.”

Those simple words make your heart race and never change. The effects of him on you never change a bit.

“K-Koushi-?”

He then kisses you on the lips. “We still have time. Let’s go.”

“Eh? What-? Where? But I’m cooking!” He holds your hand and dragged you to your bedroom.

  You sighed heavily as you type on your computer at the office.

“Sugawara-san, are you okay? You look tired.” Your officemate asked you.

“Ah, it’s nothing. I kind of stayed up too late last night.” You yawn.

Your body aches a bit after that steamy morning with your husband. It’s intense that you can’t even say a word. You know how calm he is whatever he’s doing. But that is really something. You two are so busy that you forgot to have quality time together. Well, who are you complain? Coz you know you miss him too. Just how many times you managed to have a look at your husband while he’s showering. You think you’re a perv. But at least you know your husband is still so into you after he married you 2 years ago.

Suddenly your phone pings.

 Hitoka-chan

Kumi-senpai, have a drink with us this afternoon.

 You are kind of tempted to have a go, but feel conscious since your husband is still busy and then you will go out and have a drink.

Then another message pops on your phone.

 Suga-daddy 

Cupcake, Shimizu asked if you can go out later tonight. She said you didn’t answer their messages.

 And yes, they already texted your husband. You plan to ignore their invitation just like before.

You type a message, “Can I see them? I’m worried about you. You’re working hard and then I go out to have drinks with our friends.”

You press send. And you sighed. You can’t let your husband go home without you there to greet him.

Then another ping.

  Suga-daddy

It’s okay honey. Go out with them. I’ll just pick you up so we go home together. It’s been a while since you met your girlfriends. I’m sure they miss you. I can’t keep you all to myself, right?

 You almost cry at your husband’s reply. Thinking he’s the best husband in the whole world. Anyway, he said yes and then you can go out.

 After you are done with your work that afternoon. Your phone pings once again.

 Suga-daddy

Hey, cupcake, I still have a meeting this afternoon, and I need to still help them with the questionnaire for the exams. Message me where will you guys go okay? Enjoy your night with them.

 It makes you smile and blushed so much thinking how sweet your husband is.

 You open a glass door as you enter the familiar bar you and your high school friends really like.

“Kumi-senpai!!! Here!”

You saw the familiar faces, your cute kouhai Hitoka, your classmate Shimizu who was waving at you a little, and the wild onee-san, Saeko.

After you settle in the chair with them, you can’t hide your smile, seeing familiar faces again.

“How are you guys? I’m so glad we got here.”

Hitoka is still so cute, and Kiyoko didn’t even change and becomes more pretty, While Saeko is still as cool as ever.

“Osu!! I thought Koushi won’t let you come. Ha ha!” Saeko-nee-san is blushing already, she must be drinking lots you think.

“Ha ha. He won’t do that. He always spoils me anyway.” You can’t help but boast about your husband.

“I guess he's a very gentle husband, right Kumi-senpai?! Hitoka suddenly says that. I’m shocked to the point that I blushed on her comment.

Kiyoko only laughs at her.

“Heeeeh. So is Tadashi a gentle husband to you too, Hitoka-chan?” Saeko-nee never fails to make fun of our innocent kouhai.

“Ehhhh?” Hitoka is blushing so much and you all laugh at how even married for almost a year now to Tadashi is still as innocent as ever.

Hours have already passed, and Saeko is already wasted. Telling you stories about how broken-hearted she is over Akiteru (Tsukishima’s brother).

“That Akiteru! I’m hopeless!” She said after drinking a straight bottle of beer.

“You haven’t dated?” You are so shocked thinking that they are already in a relationship since they are always together.

“They go out quite a lot, but still don’t know what they are.” Kiyoko drops the bomb of truth.

Saeko drinks another shot, “Sister-in-law, can you be a bit more sensitive?”

Saeko looks miserable as she drinks a lot.

“Does he have a girlfriend?” Hitoka asked.

“None! I’ve been waiting for him to move.I met you all when you are still in high school, and now you guys are already married! And Kei  might marry soon too. While me and Akiteru are still like this. I’m hopeless!” she is already shouting and she’s already drunk. The three of you can’t stop her. 

You can’t help but remember your past love story with Sugawara. You have to admit that you work so much to get his attention. And you are lucky enough to get his affection and be mutual with each other.

You think you need to support Saeko about her feelings. That’s why you also drinks with her.

 After a few hours.

“Wow, they are wasted!” Sugawara is already standing beside his wife who is already half asleep on the table.

“Sorry Sugawara-senpai, we can’t stop them.” Hitoka already explaining.

“Ha ha it’s okay, it’s her fault anyway. She really can’t handle liquor ever since.” Suga is already tying your hair up (bcs it’s already a mess).

“Just take her, we can wait for ryu and Yamaguchi-kun.” Kiyoko already told him.

“Well then, let’s meet again some other time.” Sugawara then put you on his back.

 As Sugawara carried you at his back, you started to talk drunk on him.

“I-i feel s-sorry about Saeko-nee-chan.”

“Why, what happened to her?” He asked.

“Tsukishima-kun aniki still held her affection. I want to help her, you know.”

“So they are still not together?” He continued.

“Yeah, like it’s been a decade no?”

“But cupcake, you can’t force someone to fall inlove.” Suga started to scold you.

“But I did force you before, right?” You felt a bit hurt on your own words.

Sugawara laughs a little.

“You didnt. I already loved you since elementary.” He admitted.

“What? You did not!” You already deny his statement.

He once again laughs. “It’s true, I always told you this every time you’re drunk. So you probably won’t remember it the next day.” he said.

“No fair. At Least tell me when I'm sober, so I can reply to you properly.” You said as you little by little fell asleep.

“Hey, Sugawara-kun,,” you said.

Suga suddenly stops walking. 

Wondering why you called him like that.

“Sugawara-kun?” He looks at you, while you are falling asleep at his back on his shoulder. 

“Will you marry me? Let’s get married already, Sugawara-kun. I really wanna marry you. And raised a family with you. Because I love you.” You continue.

Sugawara was just smiling and listening to you until you fell asleep.

He then gets your left hand and kisses your hand and your wedding ring.

“Of course, I’ll marry you how many times you want. You are my precious after all. Sleep, my love.” He smiled.

End

  A/N: Thank you for reading. 

[justdyingslowly]

1. Name justdyingslowly obviously come on

2. Nationality Australian

3. Age 22

4. Birthday nnnah dont feel like it

5. Zodiac sign (or your primal zodiac sign) Libra/Scorpio cusp

6. Gender wamon

7. Sexuality very very hetero

8. Your looks (add a picture or describe yourself) androgenous

9. What do you/did you study? Psychology (focus on sexology) and art.

10. What’s your current job like?/What job would you like to have? I am disabled you think I can work ha sexologist would be awesome. When I was a kid I wanted to be a fireman but Australias always burning

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11. Your birth order head first

12. How many siblings do you have? 1

13. Do you have good relations with your family? yeah dads finally out of his abusive relationship, nearing age 70 and his emotions and his sexuality are finally opening up for the first time and that makes me SO happy.

14. How many friends do you have? what kind of fucked up question is this.

15. Your relationship status relationshipped. Fiance? got the marriage papers in a drawer somewhere with the car rego but can’t be fucked filling them?

16. What do you look for in a SO? empathetic, mature, calm. Always open to discussion. Prefers to be blunt rather than secretive. Emotional age over 14 (incredibly fucking rare apparently). Puts an importance on context and understanding other views above all else.

17. Do you have a crush? Hellll yeah Crush on my partner and got a crush on a mutual friend of ours who don’t even know hes cute af hehe one day partners gonna accidentally spill the beans and embarrass me coz hes shit with secrets RIP me.

18. When did you have your first kiss? You think I can remember this bullshit? Its not that big a deal

19. Do you prefer serious and meaningful relationships or casual dating/one night stands? One night stand sex almost exclusively sucks. Just. SUCKS. Because neither of you know what the other likes and it ends up being an awkward mix of trying to please yourself while trying to also be considerate.

20. What are your deal breakers? Plugging your ears to anything that feels gross, uncomfortable or disagrees with you. How can you grow as a person without introspection? How can you mold what you think and believe without taking in other arguments and comparing them to your beliefs to see how they stack up? Its pathetic.

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21. How was your day? cute mutual friend had a fall this morning and were both worried about him. His back is bad and he’s getting a little older, he can’t be getting dizzy and having falls like that. other than that im anxious about seeing my gastro. He’s lovely but... specialists are specialists. Good at knowing what they know but not always great at listening.

22. Favourite food & drink you think im allowed to eat or drink? water and... foods a touchy subject.

23. What position do you sleep in? Usually on my side with a body pillow to grip so I don’t end up choking my partner in his sleep.

24. What was your last dream about? uuhhh...going to italy and being unable to get into this tiny basket boat properly.

25. Your fears does PTSD to medical shit count haha

26. Your dreams ... going to italy and being unable to get into a tiny basket boat thingy?

27. Your goals - get some sort of diagnosis eventually. Its been 3 years of trying and im tired. - get back to studying art part time for my bachelors. - pass JLPT N3. - go back to university for psychology. - do the dishes when I get home.

28. Any pets? two budgies. we also take care of any orphaned or injured birds.

29. What are your hobbies? feeling nauseous drawing writing a little bit im making a little gameboy game in C atm too

30. Any cool places in your area? i live next to a national park with waterfalls and koalas and emus and stuff

31. What was your last awkward situation? mutual friend made a comment on his chest i playfully smacked it (related to the comment) it was surprisingly hard “O-oh wow, thats... I didnt expect that” my partner laughed at me. it was awful.

32. What is your last regret? getting embarrassed at friends pecs stop making me think about it 33. Language/s you can speak english. N4 Japanese.

34. Do you believe in astrological stuff? (Zodiac, tarot, etc.) of course not what the fuck

35. Have any quirks? Quirkless. I do wiggle when im happy though apparently.

36. Your pet peeves open doors.

37. Ideal vacation spend a months chilling in an old japanese house in autumn hokkaido oooooof that sounds nice

38. Any scars? internal? yes

39. What does your last text message say? peepee poopoo ustinky

40. Last 5 things from your search history how do i find this

41. What’s your [device] background? Sam Porter Bridges walkin around Sam Porter Bridges cuddling BB-28 Louise while he sleeps my chicken

42. What do you daydream about? all might

43. Describe your dream home an old japanese house in autumn hokkaido oooooof that sounds nice

44. What’s your religion/Your thought about religion its a comforting thought having a parent-figure who cares about you and looks after all the big things you can’t manage yourself, but institutionalizing it runs a severe risk of becoming harmful cults. And it often does.

45. Your personality type me

46. The most dangerous thing you’ve done i saw the lost bunny that was on all the posters in the neighbourhood looked thin and patchy so i grabbed him to take him home. im allergic. sent me to hospital and I almost died.

47. Are you happy with your current life? feeling sick sucks and partners having a depressive episode but things are pretty good

48. Some things you’ve tried in your life living

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49. What does your wardrobe consist of? blacks, reds, whites and pinks

50. Favourite colour to wear? at the moment pink. Red is always comforting though.

51. How would you describe your style? mix between lazy alternative punk, teenager with band shirts and harajuku peach kawaii uwu

52. Are you happy with your current looks? kinda wish i was a bit shorter but what can you do

53. If you could change/add something to your appearance - impossible or not - what would it be? bit shorter

54. Any tattoos or piercings? lol no PTSD

55. Do you get complimented often? by who? partner constantly, family haha are you kidding im australian so a friend’s version of showing affection is calling you a cunt and slapping your ass in public

56. Favourite aesthetic? all might

57. A popular trend that you dislike blocking because you disagree or find them distasteful. Ignoring all context to opposing thoughts and arguments. taking a personal feeling of disgust to mean something is evil. Blocking your ears to anything that isn’t a circlejerk of what you already think - and trying to isolate anyone who even just listens to something other then the noise of your sloppy dicks to have a thought of their own.

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58. Songs you’re currently obsessed with? The Machine by Low Roar

59. Song you normally wouldn’t admit you like. why wouldnt i admit i like a song

60. Favourite genre? probably enka haha

61. Favourite artist/band/genre? probably enka haha oh and tatsuro yamashita

62. Hated popular songs/artists? why the hell would I hate something like a song? I hate aspects of the music industry as a whole I guess?

63. Put your music on shuffle and list first 5 which playlist they aren’t all together in one place

64. Can you sing or play any instruments? piano, saxophone... uh... partners good at making music and playing shakuhachi

65. Do you like karaoke? no.

66. Own any albums? yes? many?

67. Do you listen to radio? What stations? no. but triple J, ABC Jazz and Classical. sometimes they even play final fantasy and JRPG music on classical which is pretty neat. -

68. Favourite movie/series? can i make this about games because then the answer is Metal Gear Solid

69. Favourite genre of movies/books/etc ...shounen?

70. Your fictional crush/es if they’re over 40yrs old, male and happy and bubbily or grumpy and sad then there’s a big ol fat chance I wanna bone. Solid Snake from MGS4, All Might and pretty much anyone drawn by Tarou Madoromi.

71. Which fictional character is you? uh

72. Are you a shipper? List your otps, if so what does this even mean what language is this

73. Favourite greek god? idk hades seems chill

74. A legend from where you live that you like the story of Tjilbruke is funny and good. all Kaurna stories are good.

75. Do you like art? What’s your favourite work or artist? im in a big egon schiele mood atm.

76. Can you share your other social media? no i am incapable

77. Favourite youtubers? many

78. Favourite platform? not too high up. actually i like being a little lower than ground level in corners.

79. How much time do you spend on the internet? too much

80. What video games have you played? Which one’s your favourite? look i just want to say that MGS4 is the best one in the series and Death Stranding is phenomenally engaging.

81. Your favourite books (manga also counts) these are all so goddamn definitive how can I pick? Oh wait the answer is One Piece

82. Do you play board/card games? I play DnD atm and know 15 yr old rules to Yugioh

83. Have you ever been to a night marathon in cinema? that shit dosn’t happen here

84. Favourite holiday golden week coz its a week also easter because thats when all the glucose based sweets come back

85. Are you into dramas? what kind

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86. Would you use death note, if you had one? no. thats called being a murderer.

87. What changes would you make in the world, no matter how impossible, if you had the power to? chill people out a bit. when people feel unsafe they get really depenfive and territorial and block their ears to everything, making in-and-out groups for themsevles that end up putting them in more harm.

88. Could you survive a zombie apocalypse? im disabled with a disabled partner. we arent funny sure we can survive normal everyday life when society is angled so sharply against us.

89. If you had to be turned into a paranormal being, what would it be? id like to be a mimi spirit

90. What would you want to happen to you after your death? spooky time

91. If you had to change your name, what would be your pick? toshinori yagi

92. Who would you switch your life with for a week? anyone healthy

93. Pick an emoji to be your tattoo that cursed one with the intense eyes and the hand

94. Write 3 things about yourself - only one of them must be true im me im not me im pee

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95. Cold or hot? cold.

96. Be a hero or be a villain? both are distasteful ideas in reality

97. Sing everything you want to say or rhyme? i can’t do either partner speak sin bad puns and its hell, these both sound about equal

98. Shapeshifting or controlling time? shapeshifting. controlling time is eithe rmanipulative or lonely. shapeshifing is every other superpower at once.

99. Be immortal or be immune to everything aside from natural death? both are deeply upsetting ideas

100. ….. or …..? jiji or ossan? generally Jiji, but ossans can be lovely too.

[whence-the-woody]

Finale commentary under the cut

So I wanted to kind of liveblog as I was watching but held back so these are my remembered reactions/second watch reactions

Bummed there was no song recap but quickly figured itd play at the end

PUPPY. Best part of the ep, lbr, Dean was so cute with him

Theyre really doing a cheesey life montage huh - still not clear whether monsters are a thing in this new world?

I was watching the mins tick by during this first montage like OKAY we get it, cheesey happy home life, move along. There was only 40 mins left of the whole show like get on with it, it went way too long 

We definately needed to restablished that Sam is neat while Dean is messy. Totally necessary to spend time on that. Also didnt Dean get houseproud when they moved into the bunker?? What happened to that?

OMG get on with it

Then becomes apparent that hunting is still a thing. Which if so what was the point of showing then doing fucking laundry and dishes while “Ordinary life” plays - if its not just an ordinary life?

At this point i thought it might go the route of them being listless without hunting as a job but then murder scene so I guess not

This whole pie sequence is stupid and a waste of time, we all know it

Dean being a cold, heartless bitch about everyone being dead. Aces. Not unexpected but still just great. How dare you be so happy about pie fuck you dude. 

DOES ANYONE REMEMBER EILEEN

Pie is the face is not funny my dudes come the fuck on

I started skipping through during the murder scene. I was bored. Like, I dont care about tension building to the murder of a family we dont fucking know. Ive always skipped these scenes, what is the damn point. Its not scary or interesting. 

GET ON WITH IT

Same old FBI bullshit. Nice to see the journal again I guess. But like, this is STILL what we’re doing? In the very last ep? Same old, different day, just like 15 years ago. Really?

Singer and Kripke. Subtle. 

I skipped through the interrogation too. I dont find the scary brother act cool or entertaining 

15 mins in and nothing has happened

Theyre trying so hard to give Dean jokes and nothing is landing, its so cringe just stop

The way the little clown faces pop up - if that supposed to be scary? Really? Its all just so silly rn

Watching it again I realise just how easy this hunt is. The answer is in the journal. They find the exact family. They find the exact barn. The kids are just stood in a cupboard. This is what takes Dean out, really? Its not even a normal hunt, its a way too fucking easy one. 

I do not remember this chick or what ep she was in, maybe theres some parallell or foreshadowing by bringing her back but if there is I dont get it

Bottom line if youre gonna bring people back WHY THE FUCK THIS RANDOM GIRL

I knew so fast he was gonna go out like that. Hanging from a fucking nail

I kept saying out loud not like this, no way, this is so stupid, its so stupid omg

I paused and tried to talk myself into putting aside how stupid and awkward it was for him to be doing this scene hanging off a pole and just try to invest in the emotion of the speech. Which I achieved at times

but why was is so awkward tho?? Just the way hes stood pressed against it is fucking weird. Also 1000% Sam couldve gotten help and he wouldve been FINE. It took so long for them to talk, an ambulance couldve been there before they were done, there was no need for this

Okay the speech did make me cry once I pep talked myself into being invested. The reference to being scared Sam would reject him, the I love you so much, Sam saying dont leave me, the stay with me and tell me its okay - all those moments got me and I did cry. I appreciated the family business line. I liked Jensen telling Jared he always keeps fighting, that was a nice reference. 

BUT there were also those moments that made me scoff, roll my eyes or laugh. The whole “always you and me” bullshit especially. The second I knew he was going to say I’ll be in your heart I yelled at them to no do it, I hate that cheesey move, then literally was like “oh my god, he did it”. It WAS NOT always going to end like this - so much of the last 15 years was proving him wrong about that. This is all just so wrong, it is not good. 

Jensen and Jared did a good job with what they were given in this scene but my god

The audacity of the Cas erasure- always you and me. FUCK YOU. 

I laughed out loud when his last shot was a One Perfect Tear. I was literally like “Oh wow they did that”

DEAN DESERVED A BETTER DEATH

It also kinda loses all impact when you see him like 2 mins later

MIRACLE IS THE REAL MVP ILY

Theyre really doing another montage. Really. Like we get it, hes sad, we didnt need the toast to understand that

Omg Miracle by his side. The best of bois. 

Looking around his room like beer and guns was all dean was. Sure. Aces. 

I choose to believe Bon Jovi was a ref to before Dean went to hell

If Donna is back why isnt anyone else?!?

Oh Jared you look so old bby. Go home. He looks older there then later in the ridiculous make up

Why is that shot made to look like hes leaving the bunker forever?? Like that makes no sense

Bobby greeting him is nice and all BUT IT SHOULDVE BEEN CAS

Also they are 1000% doing the show don’t tell by having Bobby just sit and explain everything. SO FUCKING LAZY

Cas has been out of the empty, helping rebuild heaven. Okay, fine. Even Dean’s reaction to hearing that was fine. BUT YOU ASK WHERE YOUR FUCKING BEST FRIEND IS AND GO SEE HIM. WHO IS THIS VERSION OF DEAN WTF

I know people are upset Cas is back working in heaven but I dont think its anything like before. It sounds like he helped fixed things then got his own heaven. Also he’s God’s Dad, hes not serving God, hes teaching him. I know human Cas done right is what we wanted but I dont hate this for him. BUT WE SHOULD HAVE FUCKING SEEN IT. 

Why is a memory of being a kid with his Dad what Dean is reminiscing on. They have literally reverted him back to s1. There are so many memories dean should be thinking about in fucking heaven

Hes going for a drive

Hes going for a motherfucking drive

In the car he was just in

WHY THE FUCK IS HE ACTING LIKE HE HASNT SEEN BABY IN YEARS WHAT IS THIS SHIT

Hes going to drive around doing nothing until Sam gets there are you fucking kidding me. Not going to see any of his family from the last 15 years, just driving. Absolute horseshit. 

This is the moment where you realise that this episode has changed NOTHING. This is the same ending as the last ep except theyre in heaven not on earth

ITS THE EXACT SAME FUCKING THING

Okay so they skip over how Sam went from going on a hunt to walking with a toddler. OMG how unsubtle that they have literally just labelled the child Dean in big yellow letters. I couldnt help but laugh, how fucking stupid. 

I did get a bit teary when the music started I’ll be honest. But mostly through the whole montage (ANOTHER ONE) I was saying to myself This is so fucking stupid. omg this is dumb, what the fuck is this, so stupid.

They literally did a montage so long they had to play the song twice. Im just done at this point wow. 

The old man make up is so bad I just laughed. The only pictures being of the 4 of them, reinforcing the Winchester only bullshit, great. Not even pics of this new random family Sam’s got. The painfully cliche Dad moments for Sam, again so bad its funny. Omg the hand on the head of this random kid, this is so ridiculous. Old man sam in his bad wig trying so hard to move like hes old and crying in the impala. Wtf is happening, this is SO STUPID 

I thought theyd cast a more attractive son I’ll be honest. So he has the tattoo - are they a hunting family? Because that would go against both s1 Sam they’ve tried to go back to and the s15 Sam they build up to for all those years

I know they were going for an emotional parallel with that “you can go now” but this random man saying it to Sam in that make up, with the music cue lined up right there - its just funny coz its so dumb im sorry

I cant believe they actually played another different version, I’ll never get over that

Theres alot of things I’ll never get over

Is this bridge supposed to mean something? They shouldve picked a setting that meant something

I know theyre trying so hard to make Dean look happy and peaceful to convince us its a good ending but sis no

I laughed out loud when Dean turned around - WHAT IS THAT OUTFIT SAM?

Really, they have nothing to say? No questions, no convo? They just have cheesey smiles and look over the water? This is so wrapped up in a fucking bow trying to force us to feel good my god

The cut almost immediately to them talking to the camera, still in character getup, was so cringe I yelled and turned it off

And they pan out to literally none of the people we want to see . Great, Good. 

LITERALLY WHAT WAS THE POINT