#i still have a lot on my to read list AHH need to get through them all one day

[lottiies]

shyly blowing a virtual kiss to every leon smut fanfic writer that has made my clit act up bc of their writing ໒꒰ྀིっ⸝⸝⸝ ꒱ྀི১

[kitthepurplepotato]

MWRMI Part 6

My Weird Roomate, Midoriya Izuku

Week 3 part 2 / Meet the Gang!

~•🥦•~

Summary: Y/N learns about Midoriya’s past and the gang’s secret tattoos. …?!

Also, why is Kirishima half-naked all of the sudden?!

Warnings: Swear words, hints of suggestiveness (they tell “funny” stories, 2 sentences, really.) a tiny hint of platonic (?) jealousy.

First Part Master List

~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~

“OH MY GOD, THATS RED RIOT THAT’S FUCKING RED RIOT, Midoriya!”

Okay, listen.

Red Riot doesn’t have a fan base; he has a fucking cult.

That guy had the glow up of the century after going through puberty.

Red Riot? More like Red Daddy.

No jokes, people say that quite a lot when they are talking about the hero. He’s so liked for his looks he actually managed to beat Dynamight and Deku on the “best looking bachelor” charts.

Red Riot barely had any presence in the hero world for his first few years; he had no confidence and he really didn’t think he can be a good hero or at least that’s what he’d said in the interviews. Then Dynamight took him under his wings, took him away from his last agency and that’s when the name Red Riot became a phenomenon; he got even more ripped and grew his hair out but still kept it red, just one shade darker; it’s shorter at the front and really long at the back which makes him look like a lion; majestic and frightening when fighting a villain. His close relationship with Dynamight also helped the blonde to get a better reputation, which he definitely needed at the beginning of his career; Dynamight might have been the one who saved the redhead first, but to be honest, they both saved each other from themselves.

Needless to say, the two heroes are constantly shipped by the fandom, and reading Bakugou’s rants on his official social media about it always makes your day better. Once he posted a picture about Red Riot sprawled out on his lap after a night out, drooling like a Rottweiler all over his trousers with the caption “Do you really think I would ever kiss that mouth?”, but people focused on the intimacy of the photo instead of it’s meaning. The blonde got so furious he deleted himself from the internet for two weeks.

Red Riot also admitted that he absolutely lives for Dynamight’s rants, so sometimes he stirs shit up just to get a reaction out of the blonde; he posts domestic pictures of Bakugou making breakfast in nothing but boxers and other shenanigans like that. The picture is usually followed by a selfie of him being beaten up by his best friend for being a menace or a screenshot of him being blocked on every social media when he’s away on a mission (because of course he has a secret stash of domestic pictures hidden in his phone, who wouldn’t?)

Ahh, you can talk about these two for ages, they are the funniest pair, like ever.

Midoriya giggles at your sudden outburst while you try your best to hide behind the sofa out of embarrassment.

“Aww, thank you!” The redhead smirks. “It’s always a pleasure to be adored by a beautiful lady like yourself.”

You don’t have time to really react to his sudden flirting because the air fills with tension for some weird reason; Midoriya stops smiling, black whip caresses your back and wraps around your body protectively. He looks furious and also does Bakugou, but his anger is pointed at you; if looks would kill, you would be dead by now.

“It’s a bit cold, isn’t it, Y/N? You should change into something warm before you catch a cold.” Midoriya smiles, but it’s more frightening than cute this time. Damn, if you would be a villain and he would look at you like that, you’d 100% piss yourself.

“I have no idea what the actual fuck is going on right now but I’m gonna sit down.” A purple haired, tired looking guy sighs and makes his way to the sofa like the time didn’t just freeze for a second. Honestly, you have no idea what’s going on either.

“Let me explain!” Chargebolt claps his hands happily. “Bakugou’s being a a possessive dick over his best friend, and Midoriya is the same with his roommate. Why? Don’t ask me.” He gives you a reassuring smile.

“This is why I’ll be single forever, Y/N. Don’t be like me.” The redhead sighs, also sitting down. Midoriya lets you go while mumbling ‘sorry’ but he doesn’t look sorry at all.

“What do you mean, Eijirou? Is Katsuki’s marvelous presence not enough for you to be happy? Aww, poor boy.” Pinky speaks up, clearly enjoying the drama. She looks even prettier in real life.

“Say another word, you pink bitch, and I’ll mount your stupid horny head on my wall.” Bakugou snaps, his face a lovely shade of red. Chargebolt blurts out a quiet ‘damn’ and hides behind the sofa, right behind the purple dude who just sighs at Kaminari’s shenanigans.

“Aww, is my face is so pretty you want to see it every day? That’s so cute, Bakubro!” Mina coos and that’s when shit hits the fan; you quietly leave the room to change as per Midoriya’s advice (what the fuck was that about? Yeah, you are wearing comfy shorts but so is he.) while Red Riot hardens between his two friends, acting like a shield to stop them from killing each other. After a few minutes, the yelling stops; apparently, their pizza order is more important than an impromptu mass murder.

It takes you a while before you have the guts to go back so you can properly meet Midoriya’s chaotic friends; you still have no idea what made the two friends so mad, but to be fair, Bakugou is known to blow up for no reason at all, so maybe you were just at the wrong place at the wrong time.

“Hey.” Midoriya’s green head pops in through the door. He looks a bit flushed and a little bit guilty. He’s absolutely adorable. “Can I come in?”

“I was just about to go out, but yeah.” You mumble, your voice strained from the stress. Deku closes the door and leans back to it; his face is contorted into a frown but he tries his best to give you a smile.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to do that to you. I had no right to treat you that way.” The greenette is clearly beating himself up for his actions and it brakes your heart.

“It’s fine.”

“No, it’s not.” Midoriya jumps in. “Eijirou is a nice guy, he talks like that to everyone. Bakugou is a possessive asshole over all his friends, especially him. I was so excited for you to meet my closest friends yet I fucked it up.”

Oh no, not the teary eyes. You can’t handle the teary eyes right now.

“Midoriya…” you move closer to the slumped greenette, taking his hand into yours. He looks at you with the cutest lovelorn expression. “Stop looking at me like that. I really want to hug you tight when you do that.”

You really didn’t mean to say that. You really didn’t.

“Then hug me, Y/N.” Midoriya says, a new kind of emotion swirling in his beautiful eyes. Your body moves on its own as you embrace your favorite hero with such passion that Midoriya’s back hits the door with a loud bang from the force of it. You can hear his heart beating loud and fast when your face hits his chest as you squeeze the shit out of the poor guy. The hero’s hand ends up in your hair, slowly massaging your scalp while he takes a deep breath to calm his racing heart. Midoriya lets your hand go and pulls you even closer by the small of your back; your bodies clash with each other completely as Midoriya melts into your touch; his muscles feel amazing under your cheeks. You’ve never felt so content in your life.

Okay, this hug is way too passionate to be called “friendly”. You are about to pass out. He smells so amazing, like pine and sea salt with a hint of spice, masculine and earthy. The world stops for a second, Midoriya’s friends on the other side completely forgotten as the two of you embrace each other, your true feelings showing without you even saying them out loud.

This is when reality really hits you; you don’t just have a crush on this guy; you are absolutely fucking smitten with him already.

Ahh, you are so fucked.

“STOP MAKING OUT, YOU FUCKERS!” Bakugou ruins the moment with his yelling. When you two realize the situation you are in, you jump away from each other with a “sorry”, like two emotionally constipated teenagers.

“Maybe they are just having a fight.” A tired voice mumbles, probably the purple haired guy you don’t know yet.

“With their mouths, yeah.” Pinky giggles mischievously. If your face wasn’t red enough before, now it is.

“I mean, can you blame him? Y/N is cute as hell.” Motherfucking Red Riot comments and that’s when Midoriya opens the door with a flushed face.

“Can we start this all over?” Midoriya yelps. His friends try their best to not comment on their disheveled appearance for the sake of you and nod in unison. “This is Y/N, my FLATMATE. She takes care of the flat when I’m not around.”

“She takes care of more than that by the look of it…” Chargebolt whispers into Jirou’s ears, who slaps the guy on his head to shut him up. Jirou is a great friend. You love her. “You know Kacchan and Jirou already, then you have Kirishima Eijirou, but you also know that, Kaminari Denki, Ashido Mina, Shouto Todoroki who doesn’t speak too much but he’s one of my closest friends and Shinsou Hitoshi who you might remember from the sports festival. He works with Aizawa-sensei as an underground hero so his face isn’t well known but he’s amazing.”

“I still don’t know why am I here today” Shinsou mumbles, clearly hating the fact that he was forced to come over. He doesn’t look like a guy who enjoys being in a large group.

“You are here because you are important to us, and I can’t believe I need to have this conversation with you after all these years.” Kaminari sighs, looking at the purple haired hero with disappointment in his eyes. Shinsou looks back at him with a guilty expression, showing the yellow haired man with his shoulder in a silent sorry.

Wow, you ship them. So much.

Damn, you really need to stop reading gay fanfictions when Midoriya is not home.

“Now that we all said hi, it’s time to embarrass Midoriya!” Chargebolt speaks up energetically. “Which story should we start with?”

“Guys, please!” Midoriya pulls you to the sofa while hiding his face with his other hand in embarrassment. You sit down next to each other while the group fights over which story should they tell.

“His first almost-kiss!”

“What about the time when Katsuki saw him doing nasty things in his room?”

“That’s not an embarrassing story, I literally thought he’s not into that shit until that moment. I was proud of him.”

“KACCHAN!” Midoriya hides his face in your neck in embarrassment and you try your best to not explode. Jirou looks at you with pity in her eyes.

“What about his secret tattoo?” Kirishima chimes in, and you perk up; you really like tattoos and you always wanted one. “Ahh, she likes that! So it happened on Katsuki’s 21st birthday…”

“Oh my god…” Deku mumbles, still hiding in your neck. “You might not like me that much after tonight, Y/N” he sighs, making your whole body tingle with his hot breath caressing your sensitive skin.

“I’m a loyal fan.” You deadpan. It’s really hard to concentrate on the story right now to be honest.

“So we were really drunk when Tetsutetsu and his gang came over and challenged us to a fight. The loser gang had to get a tattoo. The fuckers knew we are too drunk to realize they are all sober so they beat us to pulp. We woke up the next day with new tattoos. On our… bottoms.” Kirishima looks down with a flushed face. “I have a rock, you wanna see?” Kirishima excitedly jumps up, ready to show you his sick tattoo, but Bakugou is having non of it.

“Eijirou, if you pull your pants down in front of everyone I’ll absolutely kick you out of my house.” He whispers threateningly, his hands ready to block the view. Kirishima sits down with a sad puppy look.

“It’s not that far down!” The redhead whines, but gives up anyway. “Please, don’t kick me out, I fucking love the sauna and I also own the half of the flat.”

So Red Riot and Dynamight bought a flat together. Interesting.

Would it be weird to write a fanfiction about that, now that you know them in person? Probably.

The life of a hero fangirl is really hard sometimes.

“I have a Pikachu!” Kaminari chimes in proudly.

“I have a Hypno. Thanks for that, Denki…” Shinsou mumbles, clearly hating his teen self for being so stupid.

“I wanted us to match!”

“You have no reason to moan, Hitoshi, I have a fucking pinky tattooed on my bum.” Mina admits shamefully. The whole team bursts out laughing at the old memory.

“I have a picture of soba noodles. That’s my favorite food.” Todoroki declares with a straight face, like it’s a pretty normal thing to have your favorite food tattooed on your bottom.

“I have headphones! Like the ones I use when I fight the bad guys!”

“Mine was a small explosion but it was too boring so I made it into a massive one.” Bakugou pulls his shirt up, showing off a massive tattoo on his side. Wow, it’s really hot in here. Like, really really hot. Damn. You can’t believe no one ever realized that Dynamight has so many tattoos hidden under his shirt. The other side of him is also full of ink, but you can’t see enough of it to be able to decipher what it is exactly.

“Why can you show yours but I can’t show mine? It’s not fair!” Kirishima grumbles. “You know what, you can’t tell me what to do.” Kirishima slowly unbuttons his shirt and shows you a massive black and red dragon on his chest. So this is why the hero changed his costume into something less revealing. He’s hiding a fucking beast under it.

You might die tonight.

There is no way your heart can take more of this shit.

Where is the water? You are kind of thirsty. Respectfully… thirsty. For water.

Yeah.

“Can you guys stop stripping? I have a broccoli by the way. Not like anyone cares at this point.” Midoriya pouts and it’s the sweetest thing you’ve ever seen.

“Midoriya, that’s so fucking cute!” You yell, the two stripping heroes long forgotten. “Colored or black and white?”

Midoriya perks up now that your attention is back on him, a shy smile decorating his face.

“Colored. It matches my hair. I know most of us are ashamed of these tattoos but I really like it. It reminds me of my friends. It reminds me that I’m not alone anymore.” Midoriya smiles into the distance. “It reminds me that whatever happens, there will be someone there to catch me when I fall. We are a family.”

“That was so manly, goddamn it!” Kirishima cries, tears falling down his cheeks.

“What the fuck, shitty Deku, this was supposed to be fun, now I want to throw myself off a cliff!” Katsuki rolls his eyes aggressively but he can’t hide the fond smile when he looks at his crying flatmate.

“No worries buddy, Midoriya will be there to catch you!” Mina giggles, clearly having the time of her life as she looks at the three boys.

“Now you ruined it.” Midoriya mumbles, unimpressed. You really tried not to laugh, but seeing all these people taking the piss out of each other made you laugh out loud. You’ll never forget tonight, that’s for sure. These people are truly amazing.

After a few more minutes of banter the pizza arrives; Midoriya puts in a DVD with some old interviews and they all laugh at their awkward faces on the screen. The whole situation is so intimate, everyone is so close to the other, limbs and arms intertwined with each other while fond smiles are being exchanged when someone new appears on the screen. The guys tell you about Ingenium’s matching bum tattoo - he has a pair of glasses -, and about the time Jirou fell on the stage; you hear a bunch of stories the public have never heard about while Midoriya snuggles closer and closer as the night turns into an early morning… your heart swells from the happiness to be able to be a part of something so private without feeling like an intruder. The group welcomes you with open arms, letting you in without a question.

“Can I tell the story about Katsuki almost exploding his dick of when he tried to…” Denki mumbles half asleep, but Katsuki gives him a massive slap before he can finish the sentence.

“Midoriya had a girlfriend in high school for a few weeks but he was so wind up about their first kiss he threw up right in front of the poor girl. We haven’t seen her since. She changed schools.” Another half asleep mumble, this time from Kirishima, who somehow ended up sprawled out on everyone’s laps on the sofa.

“I think Denki’s bisexual awakening is a good story to tell. It was the first time I actually laughed in front of everyone. He’s helpless.” Todoroki chimes in, probably the only one still fully awake from the team.

“Says the guy who wanted to call an ambulance on a girl who blushed and didn’t even realize she was trying to ask him out.”

You have no idea who’s talking anymore. It’s almost 5 AM and Midoriya is so warm next to you, you can’t help but hide your face in his arms. You can feel Midoriya’s hands stroking your hair, the affectionate caress slowly lulling you to sleep.

“I’ll put Y/N to bed, you guys get comfortable. You know where to find the spare bedding, yeah?” Midoriya takes you in his arms, moving you towards your bedroom. The group mumbles incoherently, clearly ready to sleep as the hero puts you down on the soft sheets, tugging you in like a child. Something soft touches your forehead but you are too sleepy to react; it feels nice and warm like the sun on a breezy afternoon.

“Sleep tight, sweet pea. See you tomorrow.”Someone whispers. The nickname makes you smile subconsciously. “I don’t want to leave, to be honest. I always want to be around you, I wonder why.” You can still hear the mumbles but you can’t understand the words anymore; it’s too late and you are too tired to keep listening.

You dream about green curls and soft touches, about the stars and the moon, so close yet so far away, you dream about touching the sky, about reaching out for the brightest star only to fall back down on Earth, but you stand up and try again, until your hand reaches the one with the scars, until your fingers intertwine and you never let go again.

~•🥦•~

“Maybe it’s the cold of the night. Such a drastic change compared to the warmth of the day… I’ve never felt cold before but I probably didn’t even know how the warmth felt like on my skin until I’ve met you. Now that I know, I’m craving it. So much. You are like the sun, Y/N. Please, never change; and stay by my side for a bit longer, until I’m strong enough to let you go. I hope you’re sleeping. It will be really awkward if you’re not.” Midoriya giggles and leaves the room, closing the door behind him.

Midoriya Izuku really needs to get a grip, he thinks as he makes his way to his own bedroom, already hating the cold feeling of his sheets.

… Next Chapter!

~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~

Potato ramble:

Damn, that ending. DAMN.

Fun fact, that bit wasn’t planned. At all. It just happened. The hug wasn’t planned either. It’s all Midoriya’s fault.

- I also feel like I owe you guys an explanation for the iffy jealousy scene: in Midoriya’s case it was 50% jealousy and 50% protectiveness. He doesn’t really understand his own feelings yet and he couldn’t really handle that situation very well. He’ll get much better at it in the future. Midoriya was never a possessive person but Y/N told him he can be a bit selfish sometimes and he listened. He’s growing as a person it’s just really hard to tell. He’s such a weirdo I love him 🥦

- Ao3 is down and I want to cry.

Likes, reblogs and comments are appreciated as always 🥦💚

Taglist: @porusuniverse @stickygumchewer @sixxze @mily-moo @momothemasocist

[mysteryshoptls]

SR Riddle Rosehearts - Lab Coat Vignette

"This is my 'intuition.'"

[Heartslabyul Dorm – Riddle's Room]

[knock, knock]

Riddle: Please, come in.

Trey: Excuse me. Riddle, have you finished filling in all of the paperwork for the Housewarden meeting?

Riddle: I've long been finished. Here you go.

Trey: Oh, wow… That's a lot. This all goes to the Headmage, right?

Riddle: That's right. There are still other documents I need to finish tidying up, so I'll be counting on you.

Trey: Got it, I'll bring it to him right away. Make sure you don't push yourself too hard.

Trey: I'll be off then.

Riddle: Goodness… Trey has always been a bit of a worrier.

Riddle: Although, if I rest now, I won't be able to get everything done according to my schedule. I'll try to finish this up quickly.

Riddle: Hmm, all that is left now is… the registration forms for the Inter-Dorm Magical Shift Tournament.

Riddle: …I see, since Azul prepared these, there are an abundance of regulations to go through. It will be quite a lot just to read through it.

[rain starts to fall]

Riddle: Hm, is that rain…? I was so focused on checking the documents that I didn't even notice.

Riddle: It's coming down pretty hard. The forecast hadn't even given any warning for this.

Riddle: I wonder if Trey brought an umbrella with him when he left...

[Cafeteria]

―The next day

Trey: Achoo!

Riddle: !

Trey: Whew… Sorry for sneezing over the food.

Cater: Trey-kun, you sick?

Riddle: Really, now… This is why I told you to stay warm and sleep early yesterday.

Trey: Haha, that's my bad. I wanted to finish all my assignments, so I ended up staying up later than I meant to.

Trey: So it's just a self-management issue. Riddle, it's not your fault.

Riddle: Humph…

Cater: Hey, wait! Why's Trey-kun apologizing when he's the one who's sick and Riddle-kun is perfectly fine?

Cater: Obviously, there's something going on here that I don't know! Tell mee, let me in on it～

Trey: I mean, it's not really anything important…

Riddle: Yesterday, it started raining while he was out running an errand for me.

Cater: Ahh～ yeah, I guess I remember it raining. That was super unlucky, huh, Trey-kun?

Trey: Yeah… Achoo!

Riddle: Trey, do you have a fever?

Trey: I took my temperature this morning, but… I think it's looking good for now.

Riddle: Once you finish dinner, you should check your temperature once more. It doesn't seem like you have much of an appetite, either…

Cater: He's right, you haven't eaten anything. Why don't you go to the infirmary later?

Trey: Both of you are overreacting. I'm fine. I'm just a little lethargic, is all.

Cater: Then at the very least, you should have some soup, or something else good for you like that. Want me to go buy some for ya?

Trey: Like I said, you're blowing this way out of proportion. You don't have to do anything that… Achoo!

Trey: Urgh…

Cater: Uh-huh, see, like I said. Hey, Riddle-kun… I'm going to go take Trey-kun back to the dorm.

Riddle: …

[Library]

Riddle: Trey's cold has completely taken a turn for the worse. At this rate, my own ability to care for my own dorm residents will be called into question.

Riddle: Let's find a home cooking recipe book… Here it is. Hm, the soups listed here that would be good to help warm up someone with a cold are…

Riddle: Spicy curry soup, tomato and chili soup, leek and pork habanero soup…

Riddle: These all seem like they would warm anyone up, but they don't seem very gentle on the stomach…

Lilia: You there, boy, is something troubling you?

Riddle: Oh! You are Lilia-senpai from Diasomnia… Whenever did you get behind me…?

Lilia: Your nose was really dug into that book. What're you looking for?

Lilia: …Oh, you've got a recipe book there in your hands, I see.

Riddle: Ah, no, this is…!

Lilia: So, are you trying to cook something? I thought that was your Vice Housewarden's job.

Riddle: …Ordinarily, it would be, yes.

Lilia: Haha, I see. Looks like Trey really got hit hard by his cold despite his protesting.

Riddle: Eh? How did you know of that?

Lilia: We're in the same class, after all. He'd been sneezing all morning, so anyone'd notice.

Lilia: Which means, I guess you're in here searching for a light soup that would be gentle on his stomach to make for him?

Riddle: …He came down with that cold because of me.

Lilia: Hmm, seeing you so distraught and out of your comfort zone brings back memories.

Lilia: It takes me back, how old was Silver back then, again…?

Riddle: I believe it would be a major over-exaggeration to say I am distraught. …I will be fine once I find the right recipe.

Lilia: I bet you won't find it.

Riddle: Wh-Why would you say that?

Lilia: Kufufu. Because I've searched for one before, too.

Lilia: A mild soup to chase away a cold is much too easy to be found in recipe books.

Lilia: You can just feel the arrogance of those professional chefs.

Riddle: No… Well then, I'll simply have to think of another dish.

Lilia: Wait, wait, no need to rush off. How about I help teach you something you can make instead of soup.

Riddle: Eh!?

[Heartslabyul Dorm – Kitchen]

Riddle: I never realized how cold the kitchens get at night…

Lilia: Well, yeah, there's a lot of things that use fire here. Obviously, it'll be colder when there's no one else around.

Lilia: Anyway, let's get down to business. We need to finish making the soup before Trey goes to sleep.

Riddle: Right. Let me think, first… Should I retrieve the pot?

Lilia: Mhm. And you'll also need water and the seasonings.

Riddle: How much water should I use? …And please don't just say "use your intuition."

Lilia: You can just measure out how much you want him to drink in a cup and add that. As for seasonings, that'll be based on how much flavor you want to give it.

Riddle: How much I want him to drink… Would three cups be enough?

Lilia: Oho, jumping right in. Well, that should be fine. As they always say, "go big or go home."

Lilia: Next, you'll want to add a few spoonfuls of consommé for each cup of water… How many spoonfuls was it again? Eh, probably about 4.

Riddle: I understand. Then that would be a total of 12 spoonfuls.

Lilia: Now all that's left is to season it and let it simmer, but now comes the hard part. Everything from here will be gut feeling.

Riddle: Urgh… That is what I was hoping to avoid… Can one really create a delicious dish while relying on instinct…?

Riddle: So then, what would my intuition say to put in the soup? Should I start with salt?

Lilia: Hm. Salt is a fundamental ingredient, but the best ingredient is putting in what you want to. For example… What is your favorite food?

Riddle: That would be a strawberry tart for me. However, that cannot be added to a soup.

Lilia: You think? I think it would increase your appetite if it's made with something that you truly like.

Lilia: Choose ingredients chock full of nutrients to also add to the soup. Like ginger, eggs, garlic…

Lilia: Oh yes, bananas and yoghurt were common ingredients in my home.

Riddle: You'd really put those in as well…?

Riddle: Although, it is important to consume the proper nutrition efficiently, so you may have a point… How much should I put in?

Lilia: That's where your intuition comes into play!! The more nutrition you put in, the faster he'll get better.

Riddle: Is that so… Then, I'll add more…

Lilia: Back when I made this, I remember I added chili peppers.

Lilia: With one bite, Silver jumped out of bed as if whatever curse he was under had been lifted.

Riddle: W-Wouldn't a stimulant like that be detrimental here? …Alright, I think that's enough seasoning now.

Lilia: Oh, you're not going to add anything else?

Riddle: That's right. I pictured Trey and what I thought he'd like… This is my "intuition".

Lilia: I see, then. Well, all that's left is to bring it to a boil and it'll be done.

Riddle: I understand. Is medium heat alright…? …For some reason, I feel like the smell its giving off is… too intense…

[Heartslabyul Dorm – Trey's Room]

Trey: …Achoo!

[knock, knock]

Trey: Hm…? Who's knocking at this hour?

[door opens]

Trey: …Ah.

Riddle: That's my line. You shouldn't still be up "at this hour."

Trey: I had been sleeping ever since I got back to the dorm, I just woke up. I felt a little bit better, so I was just finishing up some homework.

Trey: But never mind that, what do you have there in your hands…?

Riddle: …It's soup. This is the first time I've made anything like this, so I can't vouch for the taste…

Riddle: If you don't want to eat it, you don't have to. I can eat it for breakfast tomorrow.

Trey: No, I'll take it. Thanks for making it for me.

Riddle: Right. Well then, goodnight…

Trey: …[slurp]

Riddle: W-Wait, why are you eating it right now!? Go relax and eat it after I'm gone!

Trey: [slurp… cough, cough] Well, you went through the trouble of making it for me, so I thought I'd tell you how it came out.

Trey: It's not bad for your first time. Thanks.

Riddle: …There's no way… Achoo!

Trey: Riddle?

Riddle: Urgh… Your room is a little cold, Trey. It'll be hard to get better when it's like this.

Riddle: You should raise the temperature and go to sleep quickly.

Trey: Right, you too, Riddle. It looks like it'll be pretty cold tonight.

Riddle: Even now, you're still… It's fine, you need to worry more about yourself than me, Trey.

[School Infirmary]

―The next day

Riddle: …Achoo! Urgh… I feel so cold…

Jade: Riddle-san, please take care. I shall return to the classroom, now.

Riddle: Right, thank you for bringing me to the infirmary during class… Achoo!

Riddle: It doesn't look like the nurse is in, but there are beds available. I can probably take care of myself from here…

Riddle: Whew… First, I need to check my temperature… And get an ice pack…

Riddle: How negligent could I be? I never thought I would catch a cold as well…

Riddle: Ah, I forgot… to change out of my lab coat…

Riddle: But it's… too much work… to take off…

Riddle: …Zzz… Zzz…

Riddle: …Hm?

Riddle: Ah! Oh no, what time is it!?

Trey: School has already ended for the day, Riddle.

Riddle: Trey… Why are you here?

Trey: I heard that you were resting here in the infirmary, so I came to check up on you. How are you feeling?

Riddle: I'm feeling much better now… Achoo!

Trey: It looks like its not gone yet. You should take the rest of today to sleep. We can head back to the dorm once you're doing better.

Riddle: Hah… Looks like we've completely swapped positions from yesterday…

Trey: Haha, guess you're right.

Trey: Thanks for the soup. I drank it all.

Riddle: …You're a fool.

Trey: Hm?

Riddle: Nothing. I can walk with no issue now, so I'll return back to the dorm to rest.

Trey: Do you need someone to hold on to?

Riddle: I don't ne… Achoo!

Requested by Anonymous.

[needleanddead]

I always love when you post, it's such a delight! You're one of the few blogs I actually have notifications on for. (:

That one ask from anon intrigued me, though. So, Lucas wouldn't ever bring his captive to the hospital unless he thinks they are dying but then.... what happens after? After they potentially had surgery? Would he let them recover in the hospital or would he be insistent on bringing them back home? What if the doctors can't let them go because they need to check in with them every day because of the severity of the surgery? Would Lucas then stay at the hospital to watch over them aka make sure they keep their mouth shut?

And most important of all: would Lucas learn his lesson? That he does have to bring his captive - if they do have reoccurring health problems - to a doctor very few months so they wouldn't need surgery again? (I highly doubt it, though.)

I apologize if all these questions might be annoying but it's such a fascinating concept!

Ahh hello beloved anon! That is so nice. I am sorry that I post so much nonsense in between actual content. And you are not annoying at all I LOVE talking about my OCs and it makes me so excited other people read about them!!! ;w;

If his darling is quite thoroughly Stockholmed, if they truly believe the things Lucas says to them and he knows they can be trusted - they're allowed to stay in hospital for a little bit. He's still there every single moment, of course - but he's willing to give them the tiniest bit of slack on the chain. If they haltingly ask him for grapes he's leaving to buy them, immediately. He listens to everything the doctors say with a chilling intensity.

Of course, if they've been as thoroughly Stockholmed as he would like, they're desperate to get home too. The doctors are nice, but they've bought into what Lucas says about humans being rotten to the core, and they can't help being on edge. They get Lucas to help sign them out, probably sooner than they really should.

If they're not, if he's brought them in because the only other option was 'death' and he's had to jump through hoops - he's not leaving them for a fucking second. Hard enough to stop him from being in the surgery room, the moment they're out he's by their side trying to comfort and hush and remind them that they're on thin fucking ice. He's sleeping on the floor if he has to. The closest hospital is very small and Lucas is a recognisable and fairly respected figure in town (a veteran, after all!) so he gets away with a lot of shit that in bigger hospitals or for other people would be an absolute 'no'.

And no. He doesn't learn his lesson. He's stubborn; he thinks of it as one little blip. While he was in the hospital he listened to as much as he could about their condition, he memorised things to check for, made a mental list of supplies he's going to need to get just in case it happens again . . . so. Good luck.

[ladyinbooks]

i just devoured all of ur works and they’re AMAZING (like ‘i’m seriously considering learning how to book bind so i can have physical copies’ level amazing). i can’t stop rereading them. i just had a four hour flight and all i did was reread icarus burning on it. also your love in chains au (jay being a prisoner but STILL in charge? chefs kiss) and anything to do with samiel/jay/pallas (i get it pallas) are especially interesting to me with how they change the main story dynamics while still keeping true to the core of the characters. your writing is honestly incredible and ill read anything you write forever. i can’t wait for more of rarely pure and going down (hades and persephone references?? hello)

Ahh, oh my gosh - what a lovely message! Thank you! ❤️❤️❤️

Firstly, I'm sorry but I was grinning so much when I read that you'd spent your four-hour flight re-reading IB. I mean... honestly, that's just so lovely. (And the idea of someone loving it enough to be reading it on a plane just makes me mind-bendingly happy - you have no idea!) I have a similar length flight tomorrow, and now I'm going to spend most of it grinning to myself thinking someone chose to spend their time travelling by reading something I wrote. (Sorry, I can't explain it, but it just has really made my day to know that.)

The Love in Chains AU still sits frequently in my head, and the dynamic is exactly as you described. I've had a rough little draft in my 'random stuff' folder for a while now, that I think I need to tidy up and post. Basically a tiny sequel where everyone thinks Samiel is the most dangerous man in the room and... mm. No. It's the man who comes in halfway through the meeting, distracts 'the most dangerous man in the room' and then quietly derails the whole operation. Jay vs. Samiel in this scenario is... well. I have a whole lot of thoughts about Jay weaponising affection against Samiel in a viciously calculated way, purely so he can continue to undermine Samiel's rule. (And, let's be honest, there's also a part of him that very much loves the idea of having that power over the 'most dangerous man in the room'.)

I'm glad someone else is on team Pallas! (I have such a soft spot for him. He's such a poor bewildered sweetheart! 😂)

The good news is that there is - at last! - more Rarely Pure. I've got another 30k written, so I'm happy I can start posting again now. Which means there will be a chapter up this Sunday.

As for 'Going Down', it's still next on my list, and I'm quietly picking away at all the angst and drama in an outline. (Poor Jack. I'm enjoying making him suffer!)

[irregulardiaryposts]

01:37 16/02/2023

Well... its obvs been a while since i updated huh. reading back on some of those .. some of its nice ig and some of it is quite articulate but looking back on some of it with my perspective now, idk its sad but also a little cringe lol. but thats the point of a diary to keep it cringe and truthful to how im feeling in the moment. well anyway

its 2023 woooo im in my second year of uni and things are pretty okay i guess. im still a litlte lonely dont get me wrong but im sure things will get better. um. ive got an essay due at midnight on the 16th (technically today) and im like a third through it? but the first 1/3 is the easiest part cos its just explaining the concepts. anyway im behind on a lot of uni work. for no reason. at all. like theres no good reason behind it other than i need medicated i guess. maybe i really should get meds im an adult now so im hoping they can. its genuinely really affecting my uni performance i cant get out of bed most days during the winter cos its so so cold. why is the world so so cold. my feet are also so so cold. can you tell im procrastinating :P unis still lonely but also i barely go anyway so what would i know anyway. i got some hobbies i guess. anime has revived my want for a tumblr blog so in november i made a new blog for anime ToT. its fun tho i really do enjoy it its so fun and silly and i can be as insane as i want to over fictional characters. better than twitter by a mile cos well yeah. it has also reignited my want to make art, cos then i can post it and other people who are also insane about the same characters can enjoy it too. even if its kinda bad idgaf. the whole 'oh shit two cakes' meme constantly runs through my head.

ahh anyway i also like playing video games too, or ig the difference is i have the money to buy them and a decent laptop to run them on. so that helps fill the void of community im missing. i really miss people. and im a huge introvert for the most part (unless im drunk but shhhh) but i miss not being in my room 24/7. i guess the theme of this update is i need meds ToT. not that it will necessarily be a perfect solution sometimes theyre not but ig it doesnt hurt to talk to a doctor about it. that depends on if i can actually get an appt ahhhhh. i dont have too much to talk about ig just that im alive and barely staying afloat but not actively suicidal so *thumbs up*. i really do need to write this essay i would dislike to get an extension because then i would just put it off again until next week lol. im such a good procrastinator :D this definitely isnt detrimental to my non-existent work ethic.

maybe i can talk about something thats itching at me from my philosophy course. my essay isnt exactly on this topic but i rlly wanna formulate some thoughts on it lol.

so we're talking about what exists in the world right? things people would easily say exist are things like tables, chairs, frogs, dogs, atoms and molecules. things that are a little harder to figure out if they exist are things like love, morality, goodness, numbers, gender. the lists are not exhaustive but that kind of thing. and there's this concept of Ordinary Objects(OO) and Extraordinary Objects(EO). the first list has almost all OO, which are defined as being highly visible objects right before our eyes (that do not escape our notice). the atoms and molecules make things tricky in philosophy as nothing can ever, ever, be simple in this subject. anyway. EO are objects that are also highly visible objects that do escape our notice. you're thinking how can an object, a physical object, that is so obviously in front of us, escape our notice??? well you're not alone in thinking philosophy just makes up things along with justifications of said things just for shits and giggles, and calls it a day, cos that's exactly what i thought when i heard this the first time. and genuinely so much of philosophy is just postulating and theorising about this thing and that thing but its done with such earnestness and sincerity that i get endeared by these stupid dead guys. ANYWAY. the existence of EO are obviously controversial (of course) and even OO are argued too. but yes what are EO exactly? the example given in the reading was a Trog - an object that is composed of a dog and a tree trunk. no, they are not connected in any way, and no they don't even have to be near each other but they can compose this object called a Trog. this is what you can call an EO. it is highly visible (assuming the dog isn't microscopic and the tree is not invisible) and it is right before our eyes yet we never notice it. well of course, who would? but the question is do EO really exist or is it a baseless theory. well...

another example of an

[leewonkyeom]

Your bias line is so good and you're so real for being Seokmin biased dk biased creatures are my favourite 😍 my svt bias unit (there are so many i decided to make a whole unit) has Jeonghan, Scoups (remember the green room aggressive 'gwiyomi' video??? Yeah I fell in love with him after watching that) Hoshi and Vernon (he was actually my first bias in svt i religiously watched every YT vid they put out because of him, Jeonghan and Hoshi)

Your neo bias and bias wreckers line is so good too you have TASTE ma'am and we also have some common biases! In the neo bias unit there's Taeyong, Jaehyun, Yuta (127) Jeno and Jaemin (dream), Jisung (U), YangYang (WayV) but despite all these biases my fav member has to be Mork (I'm sorry to all my biases 😭)

From Riize i thought i would end up being Sungchan or Shotaro (still can't believe they aren't in NCT anymore...) biased but I ended up being Wonbin, Sohee and seunghan biased

Other than that it's Hyunjin (stray kids) Mingi (Ateez) i don't really have a bias in got7 they are kinda like big brothers?? But my fav is bambam! Hyungwon and Shownu (monsta x), we have the same bias in Shinee (Key and Jonghyun 😭) Minho is the bias wrecker, Sehun (Exo), Taehyung (BTS), Soobin (txt) Jake (enha), Jihyo (Twice), Seulgi (RV)

Dw I had fun reading through your bias list! I think I gave you an even longer one 😭

FR 7th sense is so perfect i would give up my kidney function privilege to see them perform this live <33

Oh Christopher Nolan! I love his Batman movies and i watched inception which was good too! Which movie of his is your favourite?

Ahh the 00s classics! I love all those movies you mentioned! I really love watching films and TV shows (smth me and Vernon have in common) and one thing that's important to me is the fashion I am a big fashion lunatic and looove to see a good outfit on screen with that being said some of my favourite 'comfort' films are Clueless (1995), Fight club, Adams family (both 91 film and 60s sitcom), funny face, breakfast at Tiffany's, Heathers, pretty woman, the devil wears the prada, mean girls, pulp fiction, fallen angels (1995) and more. My favourite directors are Wong kar wai, Quentin Tarantino, Satoshi Kon and Hayao Miyazaki (maybe Martin scoresse too)

"dk biased creatures"😭 (sums me up though). you're bias line is also so good though😭 but either way i support stanning everyone in svt so ig i would say that anyways🤧🤧 my first biases (as far as i can remember) were wonwoo and shua, and then dk just took over at some point😭

we have so many in common for nct lmao😭😭 i support that a 100% as well. you have taste fr

but omg i get what you're saying about riize. like i for sure believe at this point i'm shotaro biased, but i keep looking at wonbin more and more👀👀

i get what you're saying about got7 being big brothers, but i was also at my peak ahgase at like 15 so ofc i have a bias😭 and i considered writing hyungwon for my bias in monsta x😭😭😭 like i love him sm, but my og bias was jooheon... i'm so illoyal when it comes to them

Sehun was my first bias in exo omg😭😭 (and exo was the group that got me into kpop) and i think taehyung was my first in bts?? because of the war of hormone mv lmao. and omgggg jihyo in twice!!! same!!! i forgot to mention her. and seulgi omg😭😭 you also have taste!! loved reading your bias list as well♡♡♡

omg what wouldn't i do to see 7th sense live😭 it's not a want, it's a need !!

the batman movies are def my least favorites of his bc i just cannot get into action movies😭😭 (except spider-man which is 🔛🔝). but i think memento might be my fave from the ones i've watched

but yess😭😭 i just love those 00s teenage romcoms😭 they just give such good vibes. bridget jones is also an honorable mention. like other than that i like horror movies, esp. cult classics like scream and jennifer's body, but i don't tend to watch those on repeat😭

omggg i love a lot of the movies you mentioned !! we def have similar taste. i don't think i've watched anything by wong kar wai though, what's your favorite movie?? (i love those other directors you mentioned though !)

btw i looked at your profile, and just to make sure, do you go by jolene?♡♡

[panevanbuckley]

hello! do you have, mayhaps, any hotchreid fic recs? 👀

ahh okay I am so sorry it's taken so long for me to answer this but I still had a few unread fics I knew I would wanna include in this list (that being said, there's still so many fics i haven't read yet!). I hope you enjoy these anyway 🥰

I also did a hotchreid fic rec list in december so please go check these fics out too!!

Out of the bag by akitsuko

Reid gives up on undressing, and collapses face down on his own bed, passing into a drunken unconsciousness within a matter of seconds. 

Under the influence of alcohol, Reid reveals something about his personal life. Now, Derek needs to know - is Reid really in a secret marriage?

very cute! i love secretly married hotchreid with all of my heart + protective!hotch is top tier hotch

of planes and sweatshirts by word_processing

The team gets a case in the middle of the night and they have to meet on the plane. Spencer spent the night at Aaron's and got dressed in the dark. It wasn't until he got on the plane that he realize he'd made the wrong clothing choice.

the entire idea of this is perfection. also clothes sharing will always be a superior trope don't fight me on this

Following a Bright Shiny Thing by travelinthedark

Wherein Reid feels like 6th grade girl, the girls squee from time to time, and there are little blue drinks.

cute, mutual pining. awkward flirting. team as a family. what's not to love?!

Roommates by Tifer14

When Spencer Reid finds out his boss is living at the Holiday Inn, he offers him a place to stay. He didn't know it would be a long term thing.

okay this fic is so cute and funny and hotch lets out his chaotic side that i strongly believe he has when he's off work. also the old married coupleness radiating off of hotch and reid is perfection

Catalyst by Dhae

Jack has a secret and he tells Reid. How will Reid handle said secret? And how will it impact Hotch's relationship with his girlfriend?

i don't dislike beth but for purposes of this fic i do because the bon between jack and reid is so cute and this whole fic is adorable!

Let the Children Lose It by KiljoyTrout

Hotch: Stuck in a meeting with Strauss.

Jack: Waiting to be picked up at school.

Prentiss: Waiting for Reid to get over his crush on his boss.

Spencer: Done with everyone’s bullshit.

this fic is soooo cute and funny and uGH- if you haven't read it ready what are you doing reading my thoughts on it?? click the link!

Dare to Know by TobiasHankel

Hotch moves in with Spencer and finds out a lot about the young man, including who he has a crush on.

Prompt: Person A finds out more about person B since moving in with them than they ever had through years of working together/friendship.

more hotchreid roommates!! so cute! spence does yoga and hotch is madly in love with him. precious babies

Technologically Challenged by EloquentDossier

Dr. Spencer Reid is the new AP Language teacher at Finn Bailey Institute, and he is absolutely terrible with nearly every piece of technology in his classroom, as well as the ridiculous online systems the school likes to use.

Dr. Aaron Hotchner is the ridiculously handsome AP US History teacher whose classroom is across the hall, and on the first day of school, he offers to help Spencer if the younger man ever needs anything.

And Spencer finds himself taking Aaron up on that offer far more often than he'd like to admit.

i love i love i love this fic!! i didn't even know i needed a teachers au hotchreid fic until i read this and now i just need more!

Don't Say Ass by PseudoName (Sambender)

Jack gets sick at a friend’s house while his dad is out of town. Spencer is called to help despite his best wishes. It's awful until it's not.

AKA

Jack Hotchner is a little shit with good intentions and the adults are disasters.

teenage jack is honestly hilarious and dad hotch comes out in full here in the softest sort of way 🥺 also dad reid even though it's pre-relationship. basically hotch and reid are married already and jack is their chaotic son

Shall we talk? by Anastasia_Dumarque

The story of Dr. Spencer Reid being interviewed for the role of the profiler for the FBI’s Behaviour Analysis Unit.

okay the idea behind this fic? perfection. like literally i love it, and i love how it was written too

Talking in My Sleep (Confessing All My Secrets) by GarlicBreadforJuliusCaesar

“FBI field protocols allow for a childcare worker to accompany the team on interstate travel. They keep the children out of the way, away from crime scenes, but close by enough that they can still see Daddy when they want to.”

It sounded like the perfect solution. Gideon even agreed to find the paperwork for him. There was just one problem.

“How am I going to find a nanny on short notice?”

---

AKA How Spencer Reid became Jack Hotchner's Nanny

ahh so i just read this fic and if you know me you probably know i'm a sucker for reid with kids - especially nanny!reid fics because i just think that's a cute idea. throw in baby jack and i am a goner. you must read this wonderful fic if you haven't already

this is only a handful of the hocthreid fics I've bookmarked, if you dare to explore those you can find them through my ao3 page ✨️

[sitp-recs]

Happy writing anniversary @sweet-s0rr0w! It’s been great to get to know you and also have a partner in crime to boost other authors 💜 I know how much you love your five faves lists so of course that’s how I chose to celebrate your milestone today. My header is not as striking as the ones you make (how do you do it?! Some URLs are impossible to materialize!) and it was hard to pick only five fics among your amazing shorts but I did my best. Would love to see your own selection someday! Thank you for sharing these with us, here’s to another year full of Drarry writing and reccing!!!

Dangerous (2021 | T | 1k)

Draco's always on the run. Harry's never far behind.

Perfect enemies AND lovers on the run, fuck the police and all that jazz - short and sweet and full of promise!

Nice (2021 | E | 2k)

Twenty years later, Draco still can't forget.

Ahh yes this one hits straight in the feels, so much longing and gentle heartbreak! Great choice for angsty hours, love the introspective narrative and that hopeful ending.

Not Waving (2021 | M | 3k)

Draco and Harry have been together for a few weeks now, and everything's going swimmingly. Or is it?

This fic blew my mind and I read it three times in a row - bold and visceral and deliciously disturbing, with an intriguing atmosphere! Sexy n’ creepy, my favorite combo 💅

Crash (Into Me) (2021 | T | 14k)

Harry’s done plenty of ridiculous things for charity over the years, but Robards’ latest scheme really takes the biscuit. Or rather, the teacake. Good job Malfoy’s there to suffer alongside him this time, eh?

One of my favorite Quidditch fics, so funny and charming I wanted to live inside this verse forever! Clever concept, hilarious back-and-forth dialogue, a fabulous Draco and a lovely get together. I don’t need anything else!

Nor All That Glisters (2021 | E | 110k)

Lonely and frustrated on house arrest, with no prospects for the future, Draco begins brewing Felix Felicis in an attempt to improve his lot. Just in the short term, of course. He isn’t a total idiot.

L’s first long fic is such a banger! Deliciously angsty in a very tender, cathartic way, this is a gorgeous redemption story with a well-earned healing journey and an amazing Harry helping Draco through it. If you’re a h/c fan this is a must read!

You can check her full catalogue here! 💜

[clairecrive]

can u make a nikolai x reader based on the song mr perfectly fine by taylor swift?

Mr Perfectly fine

A/n: Ahh, thank to you friend, I've been jamming to this song every day lmao Hope I've done it justice x Also, I've left out some parts of the lyrics to make it better fit the story.

(if you want, you can add yourself to my taglist here)

for my other masterlists, you can find them on my navigation page

Word count: more than 7K (ikik it took a life of his own, what can I say)

Warnings: bit of fluff, angst (like a lot), character's death, spoiler if you haven't read Siege and Storm

Tagging: @jupiterandbutterflies (Thank you so much for your comment! I saw it and it made my day✨)

(I don't remember where I took this from so if you know pls lmk)

Most people knew of Nikolai Lanstov. He was a prince, the second born and the most charming. Most people knew him thanks to the countless rumours that went around at court: supposedly he was not of royal blood. "Sobachka" was what they called him.

No matter how though, everyone knew of the last Lanstov prince. But very little knew him.

Meeting him wasn't difficult. Since he had been of age, Nikolai had always been out of the Grand Palace and among people. He’d also volunteered to enlist in the first army, refusing any kind of special treatment and fought beside his brothers in arms in the infantry. That was part of the reason why everyone outside the court loved him so much.

Being Grisha meant that fighting in the Second Army was mandatory. Not that you minded. There was nothing you wanted more for your people than to finally be free. Also, that Shadow Fold needed to go and as the Darkling has always said, all efforts are necessary.

That’s how you met Nikolai the first time. Generally, the First and the Second Army were stationed in different parts of the campsite. Numerous quarrels between oprichniki and Grisha had rendered the separation necessary. However, you never liked crowds much and living in the Little Palace meant that you were always surrounded by people. So, every chance you had to draw away and be by yourself for a while, you took it. Also, being a Healer meant that you’d spent more time in your assigned tent taking care of soldiers than among them.

Word had gone around that everyone in need could come to you. Usually, you had been instructed by the Darkling that your powers were reserved for Grisha. However, what good was it to have the ability to cure people and only take care of a selected few that very rarely got seriously injured? Meanwhile, soldiers of the First Army often suffered from severe injuries, fatal gunshots or knife wounds. You could help them and possibly save their lives so why shouldn’t you?

That was why Nikolai found you one night. Sure at that point it was just another nameless soldier to you. He had never been in your tent before so you had never seen his face before. The boy whose arm he had draped on his shoulders though, was a usual visitor of yours.

“Oh, Petyr, what happened this time?” gesturing to his blond friend to lay him down on the table, you started gathering everything you needed. Not that you needed much but you had found out that Petyr was absolutely incapable of bearing having his bones or injuries in general repaired without having some kind of pain reliever before.

After a few tries, you came up with a herbal composition that dulled the pain but didn’t make him unconscious. Using kvas would mean that Petyr would be knocked out for a couple of hours. That would put him in trouble with his superiors.

“He’s a fool, that’s what happened.” The explanation came from his friend after he put him down gently. Despite his words, you could hear in his tone worry and guilt?

“If saving your life makes me a fool then go ahead and call me one,” Petyr huffed in pain.

“Who knew you were so brave, uh?” After quickly shredding the herbs you needed, you poured hot water on it and brought the cup to Petyr’s lips while helping him keep his head up.

“He’s the bravest of us all,”

“If I knew it took a bullet wound to make you hand out compliments so easily, I would have done it sooner.” Scoffed Petyr after sending you a thankful look.

“See? What did I tell you? A fool,” his friend said dramatically and you smiled amused at their playful banter.

“Let’s see what we’re dealing with, shall we?” You said out loud to warn both Petyr and his friend. Letting them know what was about to happen was best, your experience taught you. Both for the person on the table that could brace themselves for what was about to happen and for the person with him that was filled with worry and cautiousness. Oprichniki didn’t trust Grisha that much.

After assessing the damage, you let out a relieved sigh as the bullet had gotten through and it had not hit any major artery. It had already got infected though, so you knew it would be a painful one to treat.

“So, did you receive any letters lately, Pety?” You ask, suggestively wiggling your eyebrows while your hands cover the wound. You had your eyes closed to better focus but you were sure that he had rolled his eyes.

“Only from my mum.”

“Don’t tell me you didn’t write her back,” you said, opening your eye just in time to send him a glare.

“Ugh, not this again, y/n, please. Have mercy on me, I’m bleeding all over the table.” Petyr moaned making his friend snicker.

“You’re not bleeding all over the table and if you didn’t notice, I’m already taking care of you, am I not? That doesn’t excuse you for being an idiot, though.”

“Are you two in cahoots or something? It’s not fair. Wounded man over here.”

“Oh shut up.” Both you and his blond friend said at the same time. Petyr moaned once again and you sent a little amused smile to the blondie.

“Should I leave you with a cool battle scar? Maybe acting like a war hero will give you the balls to write to her.” You harmlessly threatened him but your hands were already reconnecting the tissue of his skin without letting it scar.

“I’ve told you, y/n. She deserves better than what I can give her. I am, who knows if I even make it home? I’d be only stringing her along.” Now Petyr was dead serious. It was true, you had talked about this often since he was a regular you got to know him better and he had soon told you about his sweet Katia.

While his friend chanted “fool” like a mantra in the background, you took his bloodied hand in yours, his wound fully healed.

“Petyr, how do you think she’s gonna react when she learns that there hasn’t been any delay to her letters but you’re just ignoring her? Besides, you should let her make this decision too. Who knows, she’ll surprise you.” Squeezing his hand you turned to let your words settle and to put away your utensils. You knew you had given him so much food for thought so you didn’t address the subject anymore. His friend helped him off the table and that’s when you noticed that he was injured too. He had a pretty nasty cut on his lower lip and there was already a bruise forming on his temple.

“Petyr, you can sit on my chair while I take care of your friend. You should be fine but for at least a while don’t stress your body.”

Mentally making a list of the things you need to tend to this kind of wound and where you kept them, you started collecting before heading back to them.

Petyr had sat down but his friend was still standing.

“You don’t have to lie down if you don’t want to, but unless you don’t want me to go take a ladder or something, it would be best if you sat on the table.” You gave him your best reassuring smile as you mixed the healing paste. Sometimes, men didn’t like to put themselves in a vulnerable position with someone they didn’t know and had learned to fear. He wasn’t that badly hurt and it would only take a couple of seconds to fix but not every oprichniki was comfortable with being healed by Grisha power. So the paste would do your job for you. It would take longer, sure and it would also sting a lot more but at least he’d be healed at last.

After looking at you for a little while, the blond man did as you instructed, giving you a dazzling smile in return when you settled between his legs to fix his cut.

“The name is Nikolai or handsome if you prefer.” It was not the first time a wounded soldier tried to flirt with you. IT didn’t bother you, you found them amusing more than anything and you knew it was the allure of someone taking care of them speaking more than any real interest.

“Let’s hope you won’t be around here much for me to learn your name.”

“I’ll have to find another way to make myself unforgettable then.” He winked at you before hopping off the table.

You didn’t address his words, only gave them the paste you had prepared. It would prevent any wound from being infected and would be able to cure small cuts and bruises if applied for a couple of days. With that, you sent them both on their way. Petyr waving you goodbye while Nikolai sent you another wink.

And so this was how it all started.

Mr. "Perfect face"

Mr. "Here to stay"

Mr. "Looked me in the eye and told me you would never go away"

Everything was right

Despite your fellow Grisha, military life could be a bit alienating. Which sounded like a paradox, sure, but everyone had their own way of processing trauma and emotions and of course there were plenty of those during the war. If the best way to come to terms with everything that happened was to distance yourself from others and try to find the solution in solitude, it could get to the point where you’d feel alone in a room full of people.

To get a little respite, you’d usually go on a long walk or resort to stargaze. Sometimes, depending on where you were posted, it wasn’t safe to leave the campsite. So, that’s how Nikolai found you one night. Even he had to take a breather once in a while. Being a different version of yourself based on who you’re interlocutor was must be exhausting. Of course, you didn’t know this. You knew nothing about Nikolai at that point if not that he was Petyr’s friend and a socialite, according to other soldiers.

He seemed to be at the centre of gossip no matter what group of people you found yourself with and there also seemed to be a consensus about him. Everyone liked him. Even if it was rare for some Grisha to appreciate oprichniki, you knew they somewhat respected him because if they didn’t praise him out loud, they didn’t speak ill of him either.

“Not a fan of crowds, are you?” he announced his presence before sitting down beside you.

“I love them, I really do. It’s just that sometimes it gets too much.”

“Yeah, I know how you feel.”

“You do? Everyone seems to think you’re a socialite.”

“It’s what I want them to think but alas, I enjoy being more complex and multifaceted than that.” He lightly bumped your shoulder with his, eyes aflame with mischief.

“I bet.” you simply smirked. Despite how everyone seemed to think they knew him, you got the peculiar vibe from him, like there was a lot more to him than what he let everyone see.

“No one seems to know much about you.”

“Maybe you’ve talked to the wrong people.”

“Well, then I guess it’s better if I got straight to the source, don’t you think?”

“That will surely be a better start. Not sure you’ll find what you’re looking for though.”

“We’ll see.”

That night had been the first of many. It had become a sort of an unspoken arrangement between the two of you. While it didn’t last long, you sensed that you got to know him better than everyone. There was something about late nights meetings under the stars that prompted deep and meaningful conversations. It wasn’t hard to form a solid bond with him after a few nights.

The conversations weren’t always personal in the conventional sense. You’d often stray and talk about the most bizarre things. Like why something had the name it had or how cool it’d be if it was possible to pass through surfaces, which led to imagine all the uncomfortable situations one could find themselves in if they were to simply go into a room through its wall.

Nikolai was witty, overly confident and ambitious and he knew a lot of things. You always wondered how he had learned them since he was so young and been in the army for a couple of years already. But Nikolai was never too forward on certain topics, his family and childhood being some of those. You understood, those were sore subjects for you too. So you never insisted. It was much more interesting to listen to him rumble about impossible future projects of his, like a flying ship.

"When people say impossible, they usually mean improbable." He’d say whenever you’d point it out to him. Somehow, despite the absolute absurdity of them, the sheer confidence that he seemed to constantly exude, made you consider the possibility of his success.

You got the distinct feeling that there was nothing this man couldn’t do.

But that was when I got to know Mr. "Change of heart"

Mr. "Leaves me all alone," I fall apart

It takes everything in me just to get up each day

But it's wonderful to see that you're okay

But, alas, as all things do, these encounters of yours also got to an end. You knew it would happen, you were both soldiers so your lives were both heavily characterised by uncertainty after all. However, you were not prepared for it to end so abruptly though. And without an apparent reason. Because Nikolai’s unit hadn’t been posted elsewhere and he hadn’t been fatally wounded. You would have heard of it were that the case. But it wasn’t.

You thought that he had come to cherish your nightly encounters too. Some of those had been full of his promises. How he’d love for you to be around when he’d eventually find the time to work on his ideas. How you had been a nice surprise, a most interesting person among so many dull idiots you were surrounded by every day. How he’d come to value your opinions and presence in his life and that he was going to find a way to make sure that that would never change. Promises that turned to be empty.

You had never allowed yourself to fully believe him. It wasn’t the first time that a boy had made the same kind of promises but Nikolai looked sincere. Honest enough to be believable. But, of course, you had been wrong.

You didn’t realise just how much you had come to rely on him until he was gone. You tried to keep your mind off him and luckily the perfect distraction came your way. The Darkling had scheduled an attack on the enemy’s army and had posted you to be on the field to take care of everyone promptly. You had never been more grateful to the man, even after he had given her a home and a purpose.

Ever since your first encounter with Nikolai, you had thought it had been a blessing. However, you had soon changed your mind and now considered a curse more than anything. Why? Because as soon as you got to the field you couldn’t help but scour the troops for a familiar mop of blond hair. Many looked like him and being this far you couldn’t be sure that he wasn’t one of them but you certainly despised the leap your heart made every time though. That was a distraction you couldn’t afford. Besides, it wasn’t smart to let your heart get involved in times of war.

The battle began, Inferni and Squallers were working together to impair the enemy’s visual so they couldn’t shoot or use their cannons while the First Army marched after them to swap in as soon as the air cleared to catch the enemy by surprise. While your role wasn’t active per se, you were a Corporalki after all, and even if you had been specifically trained as Healer, you had also got one of your friends to teach you the basics of an Heartrender’s work. You weren’t a powerful one but you could hold your ground in a fight. Especially since they weren’t expecting you. And you were still far from any real threat.

The battle dragged on and soon there were wounded soldiers that needed your attention. You hated this kind of work, it was messy and dirty and had to be quick because spending too much time on one soldier could mean dooming another to death. You were accustomed to it by now and soon found a rhythm focusing on ensuring everyone’s survival and not bothering with the aesthetic side of healing. That could be taken care of later if they wanted to.

As soon as your eyes fell onto a crouched figure you sprinted towards them. It was dirty and you didn’t recognize them but you got the feeling it was a life or death situation. Oh, how you wanted to be wrong.

The person crouching turned out to be Nikolai and he wasn’t alone. He was kneeling beside someone, Petyr.

“Where are you hurt?” you hurriedly asked as you tried to assess the damage. His uniform was dirty and full of blood but you couldn’t figure out where it was coming from. Trying to answer you, Petyr opened his mouth only to let out the most gruesome gurgling sound as his respiratory tract was flooded by blood.

“He got shot in the gut.” Nikolai offered.

“Is the bullet still inside?” Opening his uniform jacket you tore a piece from his shirt to use it to put pressure on the wound.

“It’s too late,” Nikolai uttered.

“No.” You strongly refused as you removed the cloth and focused on the wound. His heart was straightening and he had already lost a lot of blood. If the bullet was still inside that it was going to be a problem, if it wasn’t then you still had a fighting chance.

“I removed it earlier.” So that was why he had lost so much blood. Nodding your head to show that you had heard him, you set out to stop the internal bleeding. Slowing his heartbeat so that it was pumping less blood and thus eased your endeavour. You were still in the middle of the field and while you were keeping up with the warfare but in the back of your mind, you registered the sounds of screaming and of gunshots getting closer. A bullet hit you in the shoulder propelling you forward over Petyr’s body. Grisha’s kefta were bulletproof so you weren’t worried for your incolumity but for the harsh movement you had made.

Leaning back, you heard Nikolai calling for you but your eyes were trained on Petyr. You tried to listen for his heartbeat but could only hear two instead of three. Nikolai, who had never left your side, immediately understood what had happened by the fall of your shoulders and the tensing of your hands.

He kept calling for you but the only thing you could focus on was that you had let your friend down. Now there will be one more family crying for a loss, another girl mourning a lost loved one. And it was all your fault. It was because of you that Petyr wouldn’t live to see another day, to write another letter or to fight another battle. It was on you.

The details of what happened next were a bit blurred. Someway you must have found your way back to the campsite. Whether you did on your own after tending to everyone else, you didn’t know. Your memories picked up after you woke up in your tent. Someone was calling your name, saying that the Darkling wanted to see you.

Mechanically you raised and made your way to the Darkling’s tent but your mind was elsewhere. Your thoughts were plagued by Petyr’s face, by that godforsaken sound he made when he tried to speak. The realisation that he was gone hit you like a wall of brick that would have made you stumble if you weren't’ sat in front of the Darkling’s desk. Whether he was speaking and stopped after seeing the forlorn look in your eyes or he hadn’t been speaking at all, you didn’t realize. You did hear him say that you were going to be posted somewhere. Under different circumstances you have said something, anything to not let him send you away. Your mind immediately went to Nikolai. You’d be leaving him behind along with the campsite.

However, you now realised that you had already lost him. Losing Petyr had been the last thing that had completely severed your bond. There was no turning back now and part of you was grateful.

Hello Mr. "Perfectly fine"

How's your heart after breaking mine?

I've been Miss "Misery" since your goodbye

And you're Mr. "Perfectly fine"

You couldn’t know, of course, but Nikolai had left not long after you did. Albeit for a different reason. He had finally earned the Major rank and as such, he took a step back from military life deciding that his skill would be better suited for a life on the sea. Assuring Ravka the supply she needed but in ways that weren’t exactly suitable for a prince but worked just fine for a privateer. And thus Sturmhond came to life.

As for you, you kept doing your job at your new post but were relieved when a letter came from the Darkling instructing that you were needed at the Little Palace. Part of you had relegated Nikolai to that part of your mind where the unmentionable was, however, a traitor thought whispered that maybe there was a chance that you could see him at the royal grounds. Sure, the possibilities were close to zero but it was still possible, right?

No.

You already were ashamed of the fact that you’re still suffering because of him. And yes, you missed him but you weren’t going to indulge the pathetic hope of seeing him again.

He doesn’t want to see you. If he did, he would have already found you. Or write you a letter if he couldn’t, but he didn’t.

You were right. You knew you were, nonetheless, the thought only brought you a bittersweet feeling.

You found the Little Palace just how you’d left it and yet it seemed changed in a way. The insane amount of work you found there waiting for you helped you drown the feeling that it was you that had changed.

Months passed this way, sometimes the Darkling would post you with him or outside the Little Palace. All in all, you’ve kept busy. When news of the little prince leaving the Palace reached you, you let it wash over you. It wasn’t like it mattered much, whether he was a few feet away or in another nation, Nikolai wasn’t part of your life either way.

When the whole expansion of the Fold happened, you were stationed at the Little Palace. Chaos and terror ensued as soon as the news reached the capital making most of the Grisha flee. Most of them went looking for the Darkling while others simply ran away and hid. You were amongst the first group.

Soon, your life was radically changed. The shift in the Darkling was palpable and it didn’t have anything to do with the scars on his face. You had tried your best to heal them and Genya to tailor them away but somehow, they could not be removed. It was an unsettling thing to realize that they didn’t take away his beauty. One could even say that they enhanced his attractiveness.

He was certainly more powerful. None of you knew what had happened in the Fold that day, just that the Sun Summoner had fled and that there were no survivors apart from him. However, as your journey in pursuit of Alina dragged on, you were soon witnesses of his newfound power.

The nichevo’ya, he called them.

He had always been immensely powerful. One of a kind. But this- this was different. And as dread settled among your group as you watched them in action, realisation sat heavily on your shoulders.

He soon found a trail and traced Alina in Novyi Zem and set out to reach the island by hiring Sturmhond’s crew. He was a famous pirate after all and despite his unreliability, the Darkling was sure that as long as he got his money, he wouldn't be a problem.

In the round trip, you didn’t see much of the captain anyway. Some members of his crew were amiable enough, particularly the Yul-Baatar twins. You had even asked Tamar to spar with you from time to time. Your lessons with Botnik were a distant memory and you knew that mastering combat training skills could increase your chance at survival.

When Alina and Mal were held captive though, that’s when Sturmhond made an appearance. He looked younger than you’d thought and there was something oddly familiar in the way he held himself. Still, you didn't talk with him much. Your job was to take care of Alina and so you spent most of your time in her room.

It wasn’t until the Darkling asked Mal to track Rusalye and consequently spent more time with Alina that you had a chance to talk with him. It was during one of your night shifts when he approached you, the Darkling had wanted some of his to always be patrolling the ship.

“What could possibly make a little thing like you be amidst this wretched company?”

“It’s all a matter of perspective, I guess.”

“The thrill of adventure?”

“There’s plenty of it everywhere you go if you’re Grisha, even if you just go on a stroll.”

“Is that why you follow him?”

“I owe everything to him.”

“I’m sure you realize your role in this.”

“Of course I do. I’m not some naive girl who has a crush on her general.”

“Ah, so who, pray tell, do you have a crush on then, beautiful lady?”

“You’re certainly noisy for a pirate.”

“Privateer,” he corrected you, “there’s not much to do around here is it?”

“Not if you have everyone taking care of it, no.”

“Amuse me.”

“It isn’t wise to let the heart get involved in times of war.” That was all you were willing to share. Yes, he was handsome. Yes, the twinkle in his eyes was oddly familiar but he was a stranger. A dangerous one.

“Those sound like words spoken from experience.”

“Maybe.”

“Well, I’d say it’s no fun to only think about war. Life is so much more.”

“Believe me, if I could, it’d be the last thing on my mind. But, alas, l don’t have the privilege to do so.”

You had already lost too much time speaking with him. If someone were to see you or tell the Darkling you’d be in trouble. And you had made it your goal to never put yourself on the path of the Darkling’s anger. So you excused yourself and went back to your rounds.

If only you had stayed and talked to him more maybe you would have understood what was about to happen. Maybe you would have had an enkindling of Sturmhond’s plans. Instead, you were taken by surprise, just like everyone in your group, when Rusalye was spot and a shot was fired. You had found yourself in the uncomfortable position of having to fight against people you had grown to like.

“I don’t want to hurt you, y/n,” Tamar warned you as you stood face to face on the sinking ship dock. Her trusted axes in her hands while your hands were raised ready to attack.

“I don’t want to hurt you either.”

“Then you don’t have to. Come with us.” Her proposition made you gasp.

“That would be treason,” you whispered hoping that the Darkling wasn’t around to hear you. A shiver ran through you as you thought of the punishment he’d give you for even thinking about leaving his side.

“Then you leave me no choice.” She said lowering her arms. Was that guilt you heard in her voice?

Before you could voice your question though, she shouted for her brother and not even a second later, you felt your body grow still. Your eyebrows faltered as you felt your heartbeat slow down.

They were Grisha.

They must have seen you realise because you heard Tamar apologize before everything went black.

Mr. "Never told me why"

He goes about his day

Forgets he ever even heard my name

Well, I thought you might be different than the rest, I guess you're all the same

You didn’t stay out for long though. As soon as Sturmhond’s crew had left the Darkling’s ship and had safely made it onto the Volkvolny, the privateer had asked for you to be awakened.

There wasn’t enough light for you to realize you were on another ship, what alerted you of your new situation were your hands. They had bound them behind your back. Immediately you started to struggle, hoping to wiggle out of the restraints. To no avail though. Huffing out in frustration, you settled for looking around you and see if there was something you could use. That’s when you noticed him.

“Release me- this instant, or else-”

“Or what? You’re a Healer. Not exactly a violent job, is it?” Sturmhond interrupted you, a smirk on his face since he had the upper hand.

“I don’t need my powers to kick you in the ass, do I?” He laughed but didn’t look remotely threatened. Rather amused, actually.

“Please, you have to let me go. He’ll kill me if-” Panic started to build as you realized that there was no way you could successfully escape.

“He won’t touch you.” A solemn glow took over his eyes. “He won’t ever hurt you again, you have my word.” He promised, looking subtly at your left shoulder. You winced as you realized that he must have seen your scars. The ones left by the Darkling’s niche’voya.

“How can I know if you’re trustworthy? You don’t exactly have a good score, you know?”

“You’re going to find out soon enough. Don’t worry.”

Of course, he didn’t bother offering further explanations. He’d left it at that. You weren’t a captive per se but he left your hands bound, only freeing them when you needed to eat or relieve yourself.

Fruitless were your efforts in making you tell more. He often ate with you and would check in at least twice a day but that was it.

It wasn’t until after you had landed after that forsaken vehicle of his had gotten you through the Fold that you understood. His coming out as Nikolai Lanstov, prince and second in line for the Ravkan throne, had shaken you all to your core. However, you doubted that it had sent a pang to the others’ hearts as it did with yours.

Nikolai Lantsov. The man you had been dreaming about, the one that had left you behind without any sort of explanations, the one you missed so dearly, had been by your side all this time.

You weren’t sure how you felt. It made sense now why his eyes looked familiar and his posture. You then connected that the vehicle you had used in the Fold had been one of the many projects he used to geek about with you. It tasted a lot like betrayal. Not because he had lied to you about his name but because he had tried to get close to you again and had managed to somehow break that growing bond again.

'Cause I hear he's got his arm 'round a brand-new girl

I've been pickin' up my heart, he's been pickin' up her

So dignified in your well-pressed suit

So strategized, all the eyes on you

Oh, he's so smug, Mr. "Always wins"

So far above me in every sense

So far above feeling anything

Even if his secret had been outed thus causing some shift in the dynamics between Nikolai and the two new members of his crew - you suspected Mal was closer to punching him every second that passed- not much had changed for you.

On the outside, you pretty much looked like a prisoner. Albeit a very clean one. You rode with them, hands still bound, scowl ever-present on your face.

Nikolai had not come to see you ever since that night after the Fold. And now it had been almost a week since you had started your journey back to the capital. Whether this was all part of his plan to make you look the part of the captive even more or he was just gutless, you didn't know. It was working either way though.

You liked to think that his reason was simply that he didn't care. He had far too much on his plate right now as it was. Going back to court after years of absence while also making claims to the throne and trying to sway the Sun Summoner your way. It was no easy feat. But hadn't he always liked to say that impossible often meant improbable? A lot of things had changed since that night but even so, you'd still pose your bet on him that he'd be able to achieve anything he set his mind to.

It wasn't exactly that thinking this way brought you actual comfort. Of course, not. But it was better than foolishly hoping for him to still care about you the way you did for him. After all, he had sent plenty of signals that pointed in the other direction.

But then why did he kidnap you? Why take you with him? You weren't that close to the Darkling to be of any use to Nikolai in that way. And, as a matter of fact, no one had come to interrogate you regarding his plans or whereabouts. Then why?

You still couldn't figure it out.

Some days your anger shifted more to frustration and you were ounces away from asking for him yourself. Almost as if he had heard you though, he gave you the final push.

It was the usual day, Nikolai and Alina were riding in the carriage, stopping in every village we passed to meet with the locals. However, this time, before climbing back into the carriage, they kissed.

You were too far to figure out who started it and the details. The gist of it was enough though.

You most certainly were a fool. Still thinking about a guy who didn't give two shits about you, who had kidnapped you putting you in a dangerous situation and you were still wondering whether he felt something for you or not? Pathetic.

You had to do something about your situation and quickly too. Officially, you were a traitor. You had fled and joined the Darkling, that wouldn't make you look good in front of the king. He was a lousy bastard anyway and will probably sentence you to death to set an example. You hadn't survived so much shit to end up at the end of a rope.

So, even though you had initially thought against it since you were so close to home, you decided to escape. You were already headed towards certain death so what was the worst that could happen?

Your hands were left unbound when you were in your tent. One less problem to solve. Closing your eyes, you focused on listening for any nearby heartbeats. You heard two, those of the guards posted outside your tent. Maybe you could find an excuse to call them inside, put them to sleep and then slip away.

That was not exactly what your powers were for but you were desperate. You had to at least try.

And so you did. You called them in and immediately set out to slow their heartbeats. You had almost succeeded in putting them under when someone else slipped in. The last person you wanted to see.

"Am I that bad of a host?"

You didn't meet his ruse though, you knew it would make you lose focus.

"I'm afraid I have to ask you to release my soldiers." As soon as he said it though, they fell unconscious at last. Your chest was heaving by now, using so much power in such a different way was costing you. But you couldn't back down now. It was one on one and you were Grisha and a woman scorned. He stood no chance.

"Move out of my way, your highness."

"I'm afraid I can't do that."

"You can or I can make you. Your choice." The venom in your voice was unmistakable and it took him by surprise. He gave you a curious look tilting his head to the side like he was seeing you for the first time over again.

"I didn't realize ruthlessness was one of your personality traits."

"You know nothing about me," you seethed. The tip of your fingers flexed, the tension in the room could be cut with a knife and you were already weary.

"It may have been a while y/n, but I like to think I know a good deal about you."

"And I would like to completely erase this last year but you don't hear me yap about how shitty it has been, do you?"

"You never did like opening up much."

"I'm well past the point of sentimentalism, Nikolai. It is coming far too late anyway. And whatever my feelings for you may be, I won't let you put my life on the line." Your posture straightened, stance ready for battle.

His eyes flashed, jaw clenched. His hands closed in fists and he almost looked hurt. But why would he?

"Is that what you think all of this is?" Nikolai always acted aloof. He was always composed and dignified. You had thought it was for his insane amount of self-confidence but now you understood it was for how he was raised. But you recognised the pout on his lips. It was the expression he’d always have whenever he tried to get something from getting to him. To prevent himself from showing emotions.

"You're holding me captive while you go around Ravka parading your latest conquest, flashing your return everywhere. I don't know why you're doing this but I don't care. I've stopped waiting around for you and I certainly won't let your father put me to death."

"You think I'd let him?"

"So you want to do this?" you threw your hands up in exasperation, "Fine. You really want to know what I think?"

"Be my guest."

"I think that the Nikolai I knew would have left out of the blue without so much as a letter. I think that the Nikolai I knew was ready to go to any length to achieve what he believed in. However, I thought that the Nikolai I knew cared about me and what we had but look at me now. So maybe, I know nothing at all."

"You certainly do seem to know a lot of things. But you’re not wrong."

"If this is the way you care about me," I gesture to my tent, "then I'm not sure I want this Nikolai to care for me."

“This,” he said, emulating your gesture, “is to keep you safe. This is my way to ensure that if the Darkling got news of your whereabouts, he’d be sure not to think you willingly left his side and betrayed him.”

“That’s because I didn’t!” You raised your voice in outrage. The nerve of this man.

“Spare me your indignation. I know you hate being at his beck and call, to do his dirty work and be constantly surrounded by warfare.”

“Do not presume to speak for me.” You snapped. You knew it was best to keep a cool head but his cockiness was getting on your nerves.

“Didn’t you? Hate it, I mean.”

“We’re at war, Nikolai. Being away or close to the Darkling won’t change that. At least with him, I was safe.”

“You can’t be that delusional to think that he was protecting you.” He scoffed at your words as if they were the most absurd thing he had ever heard.

“And you can’t be that delusional to think that bringing me back won’t result in your father killing me.” You fired back shifting on your feet. He winced as if you had physically hurt him.

“You have so little faith in me?” His voice was just above a whisper and you knew that your words had struck a chord.

“How can I have any, Nikolai?” your voice softened a bit. “One day you’re telling me how much you value my opinion, you promise me a future where I’d be the first to see your project come to life and then you left. You just left, Nikolai.” And when I was starting to make my peace with it that’s when you come back? Also, let’s not forget about my abduction and your flirting with Alina.”

“So yes, I don’t trust you.” You concluded, crossing your arms on your chest with finality. He just stared at you for the longest time. If someone would come in now, they’d think you were in the middle of a staring contest. Then he sighed and started talking.

“I had to go away. I had already pushed my parents’ limits when I said I wanted to be part of the infantry. So, one day I got a letter written by my father personally and I knew that my time was up. I had been Nikolai for too long, now I had to start being a Lantsov prince.” His eyes were on the ground now, shame making her way in his words.

“So that’s what I did,” he went as he started pacing,”I went to Kerch to study, just like my father wanted. I did what he asked, he couldn’t reproach me anything now. I could never stay too still though, a life of adventure was calling me and I could not ignore it. It was only then that I realized that I could do so much more than sitting in a class, to realistically help Ravka.”

“I couldn’t take you with me. You had such a larger role to play in the army and besides, there wasn’t much I could offer you. So yes, I left. I left thinking that I would find my way back to you eventually.” He had stopped by now, regret was swirling in his shining orbs as he looked at you.

“You could have told me.” You contestated, taken back by all the information he gave you. “I would have waited for you.” A whispered promise for something that would never be now.

“I was afraid, y/n. That’s not my best moment, I know and no number of apologies could ever make it right. But I was afraid of your answer. I knew I’d be asking for a lot and let’s be honest-” the desperation in his tone was evident now, he had unconsciously started to lean towards you but you knew what he was about to say.

“You weren’t sure if the future you were offering me would just end up with me being your mistress, am I right?” Your tone hardened but despite the insulting implication of what you said, you weren’t made at him.

“I’m a prince, y/n. We do not marry for love and this country cannot afford to disregard the advantages that a political union could bring.”

His honesty was as refreshing as it was unsettling. He was right. As soon as you had learned he was a prince, you realized just what kind of future you could have with him. But then he left and that problem did not exist anymore. Neither of you spoke, both of you were seizing the other. You had laid it all out, defences were down putting you both in a vulnerable position.

And someday maybe you'll miss me

“You should have talked to me, Nikolai. We could have figured it out together. If it came to being your mistress to stay with you, then that was my decision to make.” You said softly after a while. It pained for you to say this, you would have never thought that getting closure would hurt this much.

Tears streamed on both of your faces, in front of you had been laid what your future could have looked like. It was everything you had wanted, you could still do your job and have the man of your dreams. You were surprised to find that you wouldn’t mind sharing him with his supposed wife. You had been at court for enough time to know how most marriages went. If he assured you it was only a diplomatic affair but that his heart was yours, that would have been enough. Who knows, maybe she’ll get a lover too.

But now… now you didn’t know if you could ignore everything that happened. You did not trust him nor could you ignore how hurt you were by his lack of communication and thus of trust in you.

But by then, you'll be Mr. "Too late"

[jekde04]

Home

One-shot for Gruvia Day/Greige Day/Gruvia Family Day 2021

Summary: Coming home from a mission is always better when there's someone waiting for you.

Word Count: 2,483 words

You may also read it on FanFiction.net and AO3! Check out my master list for other Gruvia fics.

Tag List: @shampooneko @fbflame94 @juviaafullbuster @unvalley @gruviaftw11​ (Wanna be tagged, lemme know)

“Mommy, we’re back!”

Looking for her blue head of hair had become second nature to him, so he quickly spotted her among their friends as she stood up to gather the running Greige into her arms. He followed right after, though a lot calmer.

“I finished my mission with Daddy!” the four-year-old boy with dark blue hair exclaimed as he reached his mom, still a little breathless from running. “I made big blocks of ice for the party, and Daddy crushed them to make snow cones for everyone!”

Greige prattled on excitedly, demonstrating each point with his hands and arms and making Juvia smile. Arriving at her side, Gray put his arm around his wife’s shoulders and kissed her temple. She embraced him back, giving him a quick squeeze before letting go and turning back to their son.

Gray chuckled. It seemed like ages ago when Juvia would welcome him with a half-hug, half-tackle to the ground while shouting, “Gray-samaaaaa!” Now, all her attention was on their son.

“That’s great, darling,” Juvia told Greige as they all sat side by side, with both of her boys on either side of her. “You didn’t get hurt, did you?”

Gray rolled his eyes. It was so like Juvia to get worried over a simple mission of making ice sculptures and snow cones for kids at a birthday party, even though she was the one to spot it on the job board.

At first, she got really excited as she saw it as an opportunity for family bonding. But with her six-month pregnant belly, Gray wouldn’t risk it even if it was just an easy and harmless mission.

It ended up being a father and son bonding with his little ice mage apprentice.

“Relax, Juvia. As if I would let something happen to our son,” Gray answered after taking a gulp of the ice-cold water waiting for him at the table. Mira passed by and set a hot bowl of udon in front of him, giving him a light pat on the back.

“Of course you won’t, Gray-sama,” his wife answered with a smile. “But Juvia will always worry for you two. It’s just the way it is.”

She turned to Greige and held his elbow to pull him closer but was surprised when he yelped in pain.

“Greige-kun? What’s the matter? Where does it hurt?” Juvia asked in a concerned voice, trying to look for any bruise or cut on his son’s well-covered body.

Gray also turned to look at him with worry. “Did you get injured, buddy?”

“N-nothing. I’m okay, Mom,” Greige answered, squirming from Juvia’s fussing and a bit embarrassed about his outburst.

“Don’t ‘nothing’ me, young man,” Juvia said in her stern mommy voice that meant business. She rarely used it to both Gray and Greige, so both of them knew better than to defy her in any way when she was in one of her moods.

And being pregnant, those mood swings escalated tenfold.

Greige let Juvia remove his outer coat, allowing her to quickly spot the source of the problem: a scratch on his elbow. It wasn’t that deep or big, but it definitely should be cleaned, or else it would get infected.

Suddenly, Juvia snapped her head towards her husband and glared at him with her fierce blue eyes.

“Gray-sama! You said you won’t let anything happen to our son!”

Gray gulped and scratched the back of his head. All they did was make snow cones, how the hell did Greige get that?!

“Juvia, I swear, I didn’t let him out of my sight! I don’t even know where he got that,” he answered as he moved to Greige’s other side, examining the wound. “Besides, it’s just a small scratch. It’s no big deal.”

He immediately regretted his words the moment they came out of his mouth. He felt goosebumps prickling his skin as Juvia’s glare intensified.

Really, this woman means the world to him, but she could be scarier than Erza sometimes.

But before he could appease his wife, Greige said in a small voice, “This was from yesterday.”

Juvia turned to their son. “Yesterday? What happened? And why didn’t you say anything about it?”

With his head bowed, Greige mumbled something he couldn’t hear. Gray was about to ask him to speak louder when he saw him chance a glance at the pink-haired girl just three tables away from them...

And blush.

Holy Mavis.

He knew that look. He used to steal glances at Juvia with that look.

But his son was just four years old!

“What did you say, Greige?” Juvia’s voice broke through his thoughts (and internal panic), and he tried his best to focus on his son’s answer instead of his pink cheeks.

“I-I... scraped my elbow while Nasha and I were trying to hide from Aunt Lucy,” Greige answered, and Gray swore his son’s cheeks flushed some more.

Okay, he and Greige need to have a long talk when they get home. He was just four, but who knows what ideas and thoughts were running through his head now? Better nip it in the bud while it was still early.

And maybe he would tell Juvia tonight, but he had to be really careful because it might trigger the waterworks. And God knew how extremely sensitive she was, especially now that she was pregnant. Just last week, they ran out of milk, and she bawled her eyes out over it.

“Next time, be more careful, darling,” Juvia said, seemingly oblivious to what just happened and already arms-deep into her first aid kit.

Juvia had always been like that whenever he returned from a mission. She would have a first aid kit by her side and a glass of cold water and a serving of whatever the meal of the day was already ordered for him. At home, there would always be a feast.

He had to thank her failproof Gray-sama radar for always getting the timing of his arrival right.

She started dabbing alcohol on Greige’s wound while blowing at the spot to ease the pain. Greige flinched a little, but he put on a brave face while his mom cleaned his wound, his eyes traveling now and then to the nearby table where his bubbly friend was busy playing with her mom’s keys, unaware of his stolen glances.

That talk was definitely happening the moment they get home.

“All done!” Juvia exclaimed, lightly patting the band-aid she placed over the abrasion. “Now, for the finishing touches.”

She puckered her lips and lowered it to Greige’s elbow to kiss the boo-boo away, as she always did whenever her son injured himself. But just when her lips were a mere inch away, Greige saw Nasha looking at him with her big brown eyes, causing him to push his mom’s lips away from him.

“Ahh, stop it, Mom! I’m a big boy now!” Greige blurted, crimson cheeks and all.

Lisanna, who was delivering some drinks to a nearby table, smiled widely and ruffled Greige’s hair. "Aww, you are so cute, Greige-kun!" This made the boy even redder.

Surprised, Juvia locked eyes with Gray, and he tilted his head towards the table where his rival’s family was staying. She saw Nasha looking at Greige, and she looked at her husband and raised one of her eyebrows.

“Okay, Mommy understands,” she told Greige as she smiled at him and smoothed the band-aid on his elbow. “But promise me one thing, darling.”

Greige looked up at her and waited.

“Promise me that even though you’re a young man now, you won’t give Mommy a grandchild yet, okay? Mommy’s too young for that.”

Greige just continued looking at her, brows furrowed in confusion. Gray, on the other hand, almost choked on his udon and shouted, “Juvia!” at his giggling wife.

“Really, I can give Mommy a grandchild? How?” their son asked, excitement twinkling in his eyes.

Gray took a gulp of cold water before turning to his son. “Alright, that’s enough. Greige, don’t listen to your mom. And Juvia, stop putting ideas into your son’s head!”

Juvia covered her mouth with her hands. “Juvia’s sorry, Gray-sama. Juvia just thinks it’s so cute that Greige-kun already has a --”

“Greige?”

A little girl’s voice interrupted them, and they all turned to look at Nasha, who had quietly made her way to their table. Gray stole a glance at his son and saw him giving the girl the tiniest of smiles.

Just like the smile he used to give Juvia when he was still fighting his growing feelings for her.

All of a sudden, the innocent-looking girl jumped on Greige and locked his head under her arm, a mischievous smile on her lips. “Aunt Juvia, Uncle Gray, can Greige and I get some ice cream?”

“Ow! Let go!” Greige exclaimed, suddenly finding himself in a headlock with a giggling Nasha. He escaped her grip and glared at her while his mom answered, “Of course, sweetie. Just don’t go far and don’t take too long.”

“Yes, ma’am!” Nasha excitedly answered, dragging a sulking Greige after her. “Come on, weirdo. Let’s get some ice cream!”

“But I just ate a snow cone!”

“Whatever, you’re coming with me!”

Gray followed the two kids with his eyes, watching them hold hands as they made their way to their Aunt Mirajane.

That was his son, alright. Before long, he would be all grown up and meeting Nashas from different worlds and seeing snow dolls of Nasha and having enemies conjure up fantasies of him and Nasha in a perfect, happy world and --

“Relax, Gray-sama,” he heard his wife say, bringing him back to Earthland. “It will be a long time before all your thoughts would come true.”

His wife’s Gray-sama radar probably got an upgrade as it apparently developed mindreading powers now. And since when did his mind start running off to fantasy world? After all these years, Juvia’s powerful imagination must have rubbed off on him somehow.

Gray stretched his sore muscles and popped the joints in his neck. “Don’t joke about grandkids again. It’s scary.” He placed his hand at his wife’s round belly. “‘Sides, we’re not yet done having kids.”

Juvia looked at him, the most beautiful smile gracing her face. “Juvia knows. Now, get naked.”

“N-now?” Gray stammered, surprised at his wife’s sudden request. Sure, he would love to try having more kids, but --

“-- so Juvia could examine you thoroughly for any wounds. And change your bandages,” she continued, eyes feigning innocence. But he could see a small smile tugging at her lips, satisfied with the little joke she pulled.

Gray rolled his eyes and took off his shirt. He let Juvia’s light fingers explore his body and carefully remove the old gauze wrapped around his broad chest. “It’s almost healed already,” he remarked.

Juvia just continued applying antiseptic on his injury, not looking up at Gray. His wound was by no means fresh, but it was a deep gash he got from one of his missions with Team Natsu. He threw himself in front of a kid to protect her from one of the bandits, which earned him a cut over his breastbone. Good thing Wendy was with them; it could have been fatal if she didn’t treat it right away.

“Still not totally healed. Gray-sama should keep the bandages clean to avoid infection.” She looked up at him and added, “And Gray-sama should be extra careful now that our family is growing.”

Despite her steady tone, he could see her eyes glimmering with unshed tears. He remembered the first time she saw his injury and how she tried to muffle her sobs so that Greige wouldn’t think something was wrong.

Gray wiped the tears that escaped her eyes and kissed her forehead tenderly. “I will. And no matter what, I will always come back home to you.”

Juvia nodded and gave him a small smile. She wrapped fresh bandages around his chest in silence.

“All done now, Gray-sama.” She patted her handiwork and started putting all the stuff back inside the first aid kit. When she was done, she stood up and was about to return the kit to Mira when Gray thought aloud, “How come she does it for Greige but not for me?”

Juvia turned to look at him. “Are you saying something, Gray-sama?”

Gray looked at her sheepishly while scratching his cheek. “Ah, nothing.”

“Juvia’s sure she heard something about doing it for Greige but not for you. What is it?”

Gray’s cheeks turned pink. “Well, it’s just that...” He puckered his lips towards her.

“Eh?” Juvia asked incredulously. “Juvia’s not sure she understands what Gray-sama’s talking about.”

Gray sighed and picked up his shirt. “Forget it. It’s silly.”

Juvia sat beside him again, thinking aloud to herself. “Hmm. What does Juvia do with Greige that she doesn’t do with Gray-sama?” After a few moments, her face lit up. “Aha! Does Gray-sama want Juvia to kiss his boo-boos too?”

Gray’s face flushed some more, but he couldn’t help the smirk from crawling on his face. “Well, you used to do it, right? I’m just curious how come you don’t do it anymore.”

It was now Juvia’s turn to blush. She put her hand over her mouth and said, “Is Juvia hearing this right? Gray-sama wants Juvia to kiss his body right in the middle of the guild?”

Realizing what she was saying, Gray suddenly burst out, “What? No! I was just asking!”

But it was too late. Juvia’s lips were already pressed onto a scar by his collarbone.

“Does this still hurt, Gray-sama?” She then moved lower to his chest where the bandage started, and kissed it softly. “How about here, hmm?”

Gray froze as Juvia’s lips traveled even lower, now kissing his hard abs covered by his bandages. He clenched his fist as he could feel something else hardening.

“Is Gray-sama feeling better now?” Juvia asked in a sultry voice, looking up at him with those beguiling eyes, a tiny smirk on her luscious lips as if challenging him.

Oh, she was definitely teasing him.

But why did she have to look this sexy?

Around them, he could hear some of their guildmates snickering and hollering.

“Get a room!”

“They’re being lovey-dovey again.”

“Give your wife what she wants, Gray!”

He was flustered alright, but he only knew of one way to turn the tables on his wife.

He grabbed her shoulders and straightened her so that they were at eye level with each other.

“You missed a spot right here,” he said, pointing to his lips. But before she could react, he angled his head and kissed her full on the mouth.

That will teach her, he thought.

Amid all the teasing, gagging noises, and catcalls, a little boy eating his ice cream a few tables away yelled, “Eww, Daddy and Mommy are being gross again!”

***

Happy Gruvia Family Day, loves! 😘

[honey-milk-depresso]

Stuck with Heartslabyul

I also procrastinated on this for so frickin’ long. I made two other series of being home dorm quarantined with other TWST characters like Octavinelle and Savanaclaw which you can go read if you want! I hope you enjoy this one! ^^

Riddle Rosehearts

He still somehow carry out his dorm leader duties-

Let us shed a tear for this young boy-

also there is from head to toe neatly

V e r y  neatly 

placed in order

organized files, books, documents-

What tf is this an office or a dorm room?????

well whatever-

He thinks that this is the perfect opportunity to bake things.

With you!

Well, truthfully he can’t really bake as well as Trey but he tries,

and if you are by his side baking,

he feels a little bit more confident, and a lot more happier!

Unbirthday parties can’t be carried out since

ya know,

no social contact :’)))

so, he’ll just have daily unbirthday parties with you!

And lemme just tell you,

after so many hours of baking,

he’s getting the hang of it-

And you realized he’s actually really good in setting a tea party atmosphere.

Like he knows how to arrange the teacups,

he prepared frickin’ napkins my lord this Ciel Phantomhive kid is extra-

But not going to lie, 

It’s really pretty the set up.

AND HE GOT THEM ROSE PETALS ON THE TABLE-

EVERYTHING IS ARRANGED SUPER PRETTY-

Buuuut, his baking still needs some work going-

D A N G THO-

“RIDDLE, THAT’S A LOT OF SUGAR-”

“Oh? R-really? Didn’t it say 5 tablespoons?”

“You poured 5 whole cups-”

“Ah-”

Trey Clover

Listen,

being stuck with Trey is the best option-

He bakes

A SHIT TON OF PASTRIES-

And I’m not saying he baked a lot of pastries equivalent to how much he bakes for unbirthday parties-

Oh no non no-

It’s frickin’ thrice the amount-

THE ENTIRE ROOM SMELLS LIKE EVERY SWEET PASTRIES OUT THERE-

He experimented a lot-

From baking macrons, chiffon cakes, frickin’ candy art-

You are blessed when you’re stuck with him, s/o-

seriously-

“Holy shit Trey, what is that??”

“Oh, I’m just carving the chocolate.”

“Honey, that looks like you just created Van Gogh shit, that looks fancy and really hard to do-”

“Sugar, I’ll make your food look and taste like ‘Van Gogh shit’ for you anytime.”

“OH MY SHIT YOUR SO SWEET, I CAN’T-”

Cough cheesy Trey cOuGH

And he’s like a housewife not gonna lie-

he wakes up earlier during quarantine surprisingly, 

maybe cuz he always finish schoolwork MUCH earlier now-

and he doesn’t have much to carry out as Vice dorm-

so he wakes up early,

and cooks frickin pancakes whatever delicious shit that comes to mind for you to eat for breakfast

cbdhidcchnff hnf

W H A T-

Also brush your teeth after you finish eating-

Cater Diamond

Man-

Cup noodle game is strong-

Unhealthy, yes-

but you do all sorts of things with it,

to which he’ll always post on Magicam.

Like you guys make curry instant noodles,

salad with the dry instant noodle bits for salad toppings--

list goes on my dude-

bruh-

and not only that, 

he posts all those like daily life at home (or in this case his dorm room-)

and he’s gonna be posting about E V E R Y T H I N G

From what you both had for breakfast, what you guys did at 3 pm,

Every. Second. Of. Being. Stuck. With. You.

B R U H

“CATER, I LIKE SOME PRIVACY-”

“I know, that’s why I’ll post it in my private account which is my diary btw~”

“First off, your private account has like at least 1000 people in it, secondly, buy yourself an actual book diary, and thirdly, I’m liTERALLY IN THE TOILET WITH UGLY ASS BAGGY PANTS TRYING TO FIX THE LIGHTS-”

“BUT BABE-”

Because of this incident, you bought him a plain writing book online.

You know he wouldn’t like writing with a lot of words,

soooo

Scrapbooking! *Cue the glitter filter*

he has so much fun!

Decorating, pasting all the photos he took with you and printed them out.

He loves it so much! Being stuck with Cater is productive and maybe a little tiring, but hey! Works for the both of you!

Deuce Spade

This boy-

Oh my god-

He’s absolutely so sweet and adorable-

I can’t-

He’s not the best, he knows,

sometimes he wonders why you would ever want to be stuck with him-

but this man puts in more effort than he can to make sure you are comfortable during the pandemic time-

like his cooking went from a C to S class dear-

Although they are egg based dishes, there is

A  w i d e variety in each dish-

And it really tastes good-

But you can tell he’s really tired trying to perfect his dish,

he wished he was Trey my lord-

DONT EVER THINK THAT BBY

YOU ARE PERFECT JUST THE WAY YOU ARE VSJVSWEADFGFHFTYKV-

Cuddle him please,

every day at every hour at every second just pleaseeeee

he needs it-

and he wants it-

but is just shy about it-

GIVE HIM THE CUDDLES-

ahem sorry-

continuing,

he surprisingly took up knitting and wanted you to join in after browsing online for more recipes to which randomly stumbled upon knitting basics videos

So arts and crafts time!!! ahh children-

He knits a very simple cloth at first-

which escalated to become scarves, blankets , mittens, sweaters like-

w o a h

Grandma Deuce-

and he also found these charity organizations who sold homemade products online to collect money to raise funds to give to people in need.

Let us put it as it’s not a scam website.

Soooo he published some of his hand made scarves, blankets and sweaters online-

And I swear this man is so sweet I can’t-

“Well, we have to do something to help these people! And they’re giving us a chance to give them our support!”

YES DEAR U ARE ABSOLUTELY RIGHT

YOU ARE GONNA BE MODEL STUDENT EACH YEAR-

He also used the first handmade blanket he knitted with you as your official sleeping blanket.

With shit tons of cuddles.

Being stuck with Deuce is honestly just so sweet and wholesome.

Ace Trappola

This idiot-

This absolute h e a t h e n-

I just wish you good luck man-

He just absolutely LOVES to prank you.

“ACE WHAT THE FUC-”

“What the fck what?”

“YOU PUT THIS WATER BALLOON ABOVE MY DOOR DIDN’T YOU?!”

“Huh? What makes you think that?”

“WE’RE LITERALLY THE ONLY ONES IN THIS ROOM WHAT YOU MEAN HOW WOULD I FCKING KNOW-”

You just gotta survive by pranking him too.

Also this man-

LOVES

G A M E S

And not just video games,

Oh non no no-

Hide and seek, chase-

ya name it.

At every hour-

You also play virtual UNO with the whole Heartslaybyul gang sometimes-

“WTF GIVE ME A GREEN-”

“AHAHAHAHHAHA-”

“Riddle, lower your microphone level-”

“TREY SHUSH, I’M NOT LETTING THAT ACE BASTARD WIN, SO I WNT THIS STUPID CARD DECK TO GIVE ME GREEN-”

*Pulls a green card*

“FINALLY!”

*You put in the green reverse card*

*Switch back to poor Riddle lmao*

“NOOOOOOOOO, WTF GIVE ME A GREENNNNN-”

“AHAHAHA NICE ONE S/O-”

Cuddles

every night-

moving on,

He’s also the type who will make memes of the two of you when being stuck together lmao-

As for food-

either take out or you cook-

He cannot be trusted with the kitchen-

he can’t take one step in it no joke-

All in all, being stuck with Ace is really just crack level head energy soraing through the sky with his love dovey antics.

[crackinglamb]

Fic Author Self Rec

Tagged by @dreadfutures, thank you! 💕💕💕

Tagging @ir0n-angel, @fasterpuddytat, @pikapeppa, @sinsbymanka and @sorrelchestnut. No pressure, as ever.

When you get this, reply with your favourite five fics that you’ve written, then pass on to at least five other writers. Let’s spread the self-love.

I've written a lot, you know, over several fandoms. This was incredibly hard. In the end, I determined my own favorites are the ones I have reread over and over. And even then I'm gonna cheat with some honorable mentions at the end.

In chronological order:

1 - Unexpected (FO4, F!SoSu/Kellogg, rated E, 30K words, 'ware the tags). Listen, sometimes you just need to be the change you want to see in the world. Kellogg's arc disappointed me on many levels. From the standpoint of him being a 'villain' to the possibly haunting everyone's favorite synth bait. This was my first truly canon divergent AU, and I never meant for it to become a full fic, I honestly didn't. But I ended up falling in love with the concept I'd created, so I had to see it through to the end. I have a weakness for the broken ones. Tien Xu remains the OC with the darkest backstory. Seriously, pay attention to the tags if you read it.

2 - Accidental Synchronicity (ME, Jack|Subject Zero/Thane Krios, rated E, 17K words). Ahh, rarepairs. Completely unplanned ones, at that. To date I am still 22% of the ship's authors. A one off line in the main fic of my Shakarian series became a plot bunny that wouldn't quit. It grew into a slice of life romance that covered the events of ME2 and ME3, leading to canon's hamfisted ending for Thane. The only reason I didn't change it is because it was already established elsewhere. Still, it remains one of the fics I am most proud of.

3 - Hope Is a Fragile Thing (DA:I, Solas/OFC, rated T, 13K words). In a lot of ways this fic was an experiment. I love to write MCIT's, but it's hard to come up with a backstory sometimes, so I didn't make one. I wanted to write something post-canon, a favorite trope of mine. And I wanted to completely finish a fic before posting it. Many, many of you have found me because of Twist, which is light and relatively fluffy, to say nothing of its sequel that is pure, unadulterated sugar. But angst with a happy ending is my bread and butter.

4 - Of Ruins and Restoration (DA:I, Cadash & Solas, rated G, 3870 words). If you asked me where Lark Cadash came from, I would immediately blame Manka (with all the love, of course), because without her whole entire throng of Soladash works, I wouldn't have fallen down this rabbit hole. Suffice to say, I got hooked. And then I got Ideas(tm). OR&R is the culmination of many headcannons about dwarves, the desire to have more content for a ship I didn't know I needed and the feverish grip of the Muse that sprang out of my head wholecloth at the end of 2021. It is the introductory work for this character I've absolutely gone to pieces with love for. Eventually there will be more of it, but for now it stands alone as a oneshot. There is a companion oneshot that falls outside of her 'canon', as well.

5 - What a Wicked Game to Play (DA:I, Solas/OFC, rated E, 278K+ words, current WIP). 😏 Did you really think this wasn't going to make the list? WG is everything I have ever wanted to put into a fic, and Imogen is the character I have always wanted to write. Aside from being the new shiny (because it really isn't at this point), I have enjoyed almost every moment of digging into the lore and rebuilding it from the ground up. I have so many plans and so much left to tell for my curly haired girl.

Honorable Mentions (in no particular order):

Junkyard Dogs (FO4, F!SoSu/Hancock, rated E, 107K words) my very first fic.

No More My Heart Beats Without You (DA:I, Solas/F!Trevelyan, rated E, 5555 words), sad, angsty pwp. 'Ware the tags.

Unrepentant (DA:I, Solas/F!Lavellan, rated E, 3096 words), smutty dark!Solas Fade shenanigans.

And Maker Damned Fools (DA2-I, Varric/F!Hawke, rated E, 16K words), my vector into writing DA. I will go down with this ship.

[shigaeru]

I just discovered your art recently and I love your style and composition and expressions and everything? The way you draw Shizuo and Izaya is amazing and I admire the huge project you've taken on with adapting ACI, your comics are so much and I'm so looking forward to seeing your take on certain scenes if you ever get to them. I was staring at some of your pages again the other day and I just noticed that Shizuo still seems to have that scar on his chest from when they first met? Ahh that's just such a neat detail, I'm just generally in awe of all of the little things like that that make experiencing the story again from you, a lot of fun. Anyways, I'm kind of curious if ACI is (still?) your favourite fic and if there are any particular reasons why or why not.

AAAAA that's such a nice message to read, this really brightened my day thank you;;

As for your question, I don't think it is my favorite fic, but it's very high up my list! I don't think I could rank them, actually. I just have some sort of big "fics I utterly love" aquarium and they're all swimming around in there, for various different reasons, tropes, scenarii, writing styles.

But there ARE particular reasons I always come back to it.

it's the most well-paced enemies-to-lovers story I've read. It's a very long book and it never takes shortcuts. It takes all the time it needs to establish the colossal character development they have to go through.

The characterization of Izaya and Shizuo feels ON POINT. They're assholes to each other, to other people, so far in their own head they don't see the big picture, they're very serious about wanting to kill each other. But they've also known each other for 10 years and you can just feel it in every interaction.

The dialogue are snappy and every line calls for the next one (which makes the adaptation job really hard btw because sometimes I HAVE to scrap bits of dialogues for the speech bubbles and 1) it breaks my heart, 2) every line is SO important, I can't scrap a sentence without having to rewrite the whole bit, or its answer, or the joke it announces for 3 chapters later)

The writing is so good. It looks pretty simple at first glance, but the description job is very effective. And more importantly everything's a mesh of foreshadowing and hidden references. The dialogues, the imagery, don't get me started I could write a paper on this. There is SO MUCH stuff you have to read between the lines to catch. Izaya and Shizuo are unreliable narrators, how they interpret the situation, what they take from it, a lot of it is incomplete. I've first read ACI in 2017, and I've read it so many times by now, both for myself and for the comic work, and every time I find something new I had not noticed. It's FASCINATING.

The scenario itself? Chef kiss. The balance between horror, angst, genuinely soft interactions and humor is great, and it's actually THE long fic I can't choose a favorite chapter from. Every chapter has at least one very good thing in it.

This is very summarized (i could go into so much depth, i'm not joking about the paper thing gdjjhfd) and of course there are things I like less in it. Stuff I already worked my way around, and plan to work my way around in future chapters (it's mostly the way sexuality is treated I'm a bit uncomfortable with, but Spoon gave me her authorization to take artistic liberties so *WINK*) What you said about experiencing the story again from me got me emotional, thank you a lot again;;

[starfire-s]

here’s a list of the best, mediocre and worst kdramas i watched in 2020

no one asked for this but it’s happening because i have thoughts (also all opinions are my own if you disagree then get well soon i guess... no i’m kidding make your own posts about it don’t hate me please) ahsjsj anyways click to read a lengthy post and if you actually read the whole thing then thank you i hope you enjoy this wild ride! 

THE BEST KDRAMAS -

mystic pop up bar - this show had everything i ask from a kdrama literally i can name it all found family (to real family), well thought out characters, a mystery plot, special effects, soft romances that were well written, a happy ending! no show in 2020 even comes close to how good this one was! the writers literally guided you throughout the whole thing so you could come up with theories and didn’t do a ‘aha! gotcha’ thing where they want to prove the audience wrong but they wanted us to be right and satisfied! the worst part about the drama is that it’s still so underrated and people just brush it off as some random fantasy show but it’s so much more than that! 1000/10

flower of evil - who doesn’t want to see lee joon gi being the son of a serial killer, living with the name of a man who is in a coma, and hiding his real identity from his wife who is a detective? this show constantly had me at the edge of my seat on a weekly basis so the emotions i went through while watching this are unparalleled! the writers also did such a good job on writing a coherent story that made sense and tied up all the plot points in the end. just a really satisfying show to watch! 10/10

where your eyes linger - i literally bought a $8 viki pass to watch this show so it should tell you everything you need to know about how i feel ahsjsj the episodes were 10 minutes long but we got a good story with well written characters who got character development in a total of 80 minutes it’s insane! honestly it’s still hard to believe this show had rookie actors because they were just so emotive that you could feel all the happiness, sadness, yearning and pining! probably one of my fave kdramas this year because of the acting that i always constantly rewatch! would recommend 10/10

crash landing on you - okay so this drama was actually released on my birthday last year and it was a time in my life when i was going through a lot so maybe it’s the comfort this show provided me through that time this is why i have such a soft spot for it? like the romance was good, it was funny, there was found family, the nk soldiers were all softies, there were strong female leads, soft male leads!!! ahh!! no other show on this list made me think about the unification of south korea and north korea irl because i wanted se ri and jeong hyeok to be together 4ever! but the only issue i had with this show was the ending they gave seung jun if they didn’t do that i’d give this show a 10/10 but just for that they get a 9/10

psycho but it’s okay - this was one of those shows where you’re literally like ‘wow everyone here needs therapy’ but this show was amazing i loved the story telling and how each episode related to children’s book/fairytales! the writers also did a good job with how carefully they talked about mental health in depth without villainising their characters but actually tried to make the audience understand why they were this way which included all the side characters too who had a well thought out story in each episode! also the dynamic between moon young, kang tae and sang tae was everything to me the actors all did an amazing job portraying their characters, it truly was a healing drama. the only thing i didn’t like about this show was the whole plastic surgery plot with the mother like that was very far fetched but it provided drama so i’ll let it slide because the rest was amazing. this show is a solid 8.5/10

18 again - another underrated gem! who would’ve thought a remake of that zac efron movie could be this good!! lee do hyun stole this show for sure the way he portrayed his character and gave heart eyes to his kids (when he’s only 25 irl was the best thing i saw this year ahsjs) i loved the family dynamics in this show, i loved how it talked about what it’s like to be young parents and how society still think it’s taboo to be divorced! it’s a show that makes you laugh and cry at the same time and that’s why everyone should watch it! however, the biggest clown thing this show did to me though was that i got sls for the first time while watching a kdrama... hwang in yeop if u’re reading this i love u and u deserved better 🤡 that aside this show was a 8/10

itaewon class - i actually didn’t watch this drama as it was airing because i thought i wouldn’t enjoy the plot but when i watched it i binged the whole thing in 2 days and my biggest regret is i didn’t watch it sooner! everyone knows i have a soft spot for park seo joon since he’s my favourite actor i’ve literally watched all his dramas like he could star in the trashiest drama out there and i’d still watch it and be like wow (looking at she was pretty 👀) this show aside from the acting had one of the best revenge plots in a kdrama! just watching a character realistically hustle his way to reach the top while fighting the corrupt man whose son killed his father was so so satisfying to watch! however, the love triangle in this show was questionable idk what they were trying to do with that but it personally annoyed me! but still i’ll give this show a 7.5/10 because i enjoyed it a lot!

do you like brahms? - kim min jae and park eun bin.. that’s all you need to know about why this is a good kdrama! i’m usually not a big fan of melodramas and everyone knows i prefer rom coms but this show was just so perfectly melo that i loved all the angst and pain we got!! also just watching two introverted people awkwardly fall in love was amazing! the characters story arcs were also handled pretty well with song ah finally learning to speak up for herself and joon young learning to express how he truly feels! but... the love square? was probably the most annoying thing the rest in my opinion was nicely done! i know people had mixed feelings about the ending but i loved that after all the pain joon young and song ah went through they got a happy ending together! 7/10

find me in your memory - okay this show started off very slow and it was confusing at the start but as it progressed everything in the plot started to fall into place! i mean this show really took opposites attract to a new level where the male lead could remember every single detail from his life but the female lead had to forget some of her traumatic memories to help her cope with her life! they were also tied together through a mutual character who was a big part of their lives in a different way! just an interesting melodrama with interesting characters i liked it! and moon ga young... i love you queen!!! 7/10

THE MEDIOCRE KDRAMAS -

more than friends - was the storytelling in this show groundbreaking? no. was the acting decent? yes. also probably the main reason i stuck with this show until the end! i think we can all agree lee soo had the best character development on this show he started off as a bad boy who wore one ear stud to actually becoming a well liked character... who else did it like him? no one. also the chemistry between the mains was 🔥 but the second male lead was so annoying is there a opposite word for second lead syndrome because i had that for sure! i think the best part about this show was the people i watched it with on here... shoutout to the five of us ahsjsj also this show introduced me to a talented actor/singer like ong seong wu (y’all know my kpop knowledge is nonexistent so no i didn’t know he was in a band called wanna one) all in all a predictable show but i had fun watching it so 6.5/10

tale of the nine tailed - i didn’t actually watch this show i watched it through gifs and instagram posts ahsjsjs so am i qualified to talk about my opinion definitely no... will I talk about it anyways yes lmao. lee rang deserved better that’s all goodbye and take care. 5.5/10

start up - probably one of the most awaited opinions. y’all thought this would be in the worst kdramas section but i decided to give this show some rights. the show started off strong, lost it’s way after episode 6 and then the last episode gave me what i wanted so i have mixed feelings. the writing was not the best i think we can all agree, love triangle as a plot device? wow so groundbreaking 🤡 the characters on the other hand... i loved every single one of them i mean ship wars? i don’t know her. the show had a lot of potential that was wasted but we also got some cute moments between the characters so there was really no winning or losing with this show? but in all honesty you can’t put a talented cast together like this and then just decide to give the audience a mediocre plot but the writers did exactly that! i think i can redirect y’all to my ‘crimes this show committed’ post for a in-depth analysis. lastly nam do san was a GOOD and REFRESHING male lead and ji pyeong was also a GOOD and FUN second male lead!!! this show gave me the ugliest ship war ever that i was transported back to my high school tvd days so thank you for that!! but the cast was loveable and all had a lot of chemistry together so here’s a 5/10 maybe that's too generous but... i think the reason why i didn't enjoy watching this show as much was definitely because of the tag on here lmao

THE WORST KDRAMAS -

the king eternal monarch - i miss clowning this show so much. the amount of braincells i lost while trying to understand this plot... i should be compensated by the writers. however, woo do hwan was a treat to look at on a weekly basis... however the writers kept decreasing his screen time even though he had a dual role... make it make sense? and i cannot comment on the plot of this show because i still don’t understand anything? also in my opinion tae eul and lee gon were the most bland couple of 2020, there was no chemistry between them and there was just a random kiss in episode 5 and they randomly said i love you... where was the development? also lee gon was soooo boring and such a one dimensional male lead! literally all the side characters were so much more interesting and the cast was good... but this plot. 2/10

do do sol sol la la sol - i wanna fight the writer who decided that the plot twist on the show would be that jun is a minor? i had no expectations from this show but it looked cute and nonsensical but that plot twist made me run the other way so fast that i never looked back! just because jun is a boy they really thought this would be excused like lmao we all have critical thinking skills???? the clown behaviour. a solid 1/10

record of youth - i hate this show so much. imagine not utilising park so dam who just starred in the biggest oscar winning movie to her full potential. imagine just making her a love interest to park bo gum’s character in the year 2020. i watched it up until episode 6 and i kept waiting for her character to get development... but it never happened so i dropped this show. also this show featured the MOST useless love triangle i have ever seen in my life like what was the point? also park bo gum’s characters family was straight up annoying (minus the grandpa) but they got so much screen time like that should’ve been given to park so dam... also villainising a gay side character for no reason at all in the year 2020? this show was a waste of my time i want the 6 hours i spent watching this back. -100/10 

backstreet rookie - i watched one episode of this and literally wanted to rip my eyeballs out of my head. idk what ji chang wook was thinking when he signed this drama i think he lost his ability to read because that's the only reasonable explanation for why he chose to star in such a dumpster fire show! this show had a racist character... had a high schooler kiss an adult... sexist jokes... just the worst things you can think of in a drama... this show had it. i still can’t believe so many people watched this show to the point where it had better ratings than pbio... really made me question everyone’s taste? but sorry can’t relate my taste is excellent so here’s the rating this show actually deserves -1000/10

if you made it this far... thank you for reading. let’s continue to love some kdramas together and get clowned by others in 2021! looking forward to it 😅

[jabbagabba]

La La Land

Read Prologue

Warning ⚠️

Triggering subjects: disassociation, manipulation, mind control, grief. (READ AT OWN RISK)

Wandavision: spoilers (up to episode 6 - just to be safe), violence

———

Pools Of Despair

You weren’t sure how long it’d been, the drive feeling as though it had taken a lifetime. It might have been just down the road and you wouldn’t have been able to tell; time seemed to move torturously slow under Wanda’s control.

She tried to keep herself calm besides your frozen body, already thinking of a way out as she turned the steering wheel. But it was too late to go back.

‘No other way. No other way.’ The words replayed over and over in her head as she finally made it to the front of the building, and it was the first time she fully looked at you. Your face was stoic, the only sign of life being the soft breaths escaping your mouth. You couldn’t look at her - even if you wanted to - and as she reached a hand to your face, the feeling of complete numbness returned.

During the drive there had been small moments of clarity; moments where for the first time you felt in control. It was almost euphoric being able to push through the fog.

But then, as quickly as it had subsided, she would crawl her way back in.

Even now as she turned you toward her fully, you tried to swim through the heaviness, but the black swirls of grief and anguish just got tighter the harder you fought.

Wanda sighed in annoyance. “You can’t go in looking like that.” She pulled at a strand of her hair with a small huff. “Need glasses.”

You were sure if you had control of your body, the pain of your neck would be unbearable, the awkward angle surely making every muscle strain as you were forced to watch her pull apart the car.

This had to have been owned by the only man on the planet that didn’t carry sunglasses in their car. Wanda almost laughed, a punishment for stealing it? She couldn’t be sure.

“Well...” Wanda pulled the blue and white baseball cap by the brim from under her seat. “Better then nothing.” She gave a small smile as she adjusted it on your head, pulling back and grabbing your hand and letting it rest in her lap. “If there was any other way, I swear, I would let you go. But... I just... I can’t live without him.”

You said nothing as she cried.

———

“Head down, get Vision. Leave.” Her voice plagued your every step, each word carved into your brain as you finally reached the front desk.

‘Sword’ was a nice place - or at least had nice flooring - and from the bright light that filled each and every inch of the glossy tile, you knew there had to be a lot of glass. It was a government building after all.

“Can I help you?” Her voice is chirpy, a polite smile painted on her lips, you don’t need to see her eyes to know it wasn’t anything but genuine. She lets the wheels of her chair carry her forward, her computer forgotten besides her as you near the desk.

“Do you have... a meeting?” She smiles again, more forced and you’re able to see the golden pin on her chest that proudly says ‘Mary’ and try once more to float above the darkness.

“I -“ The word leaves your lips aprubtly and the fight drains from you just as fast. “I’m here to inquire about some of my father’s equipment. I’d like it back.” You let the darkness swallow you whole.

“And who are you again?” Mary is quick to pull her deskphone to her ear, hand hovering over the numbers.

———

The name that fell from her lips made Mary freeze. She looked up with wide eyes, both fearful and exited.

Starks were top priority at ‘SWORD’ - she was sure they were top priority everywhere - and as she desperately tried to recall if her boss mentioned anything about Stark equipment, the girl’s patients quickly wore thin.

“Can you please just tell me where to go? I have a long drive ahead of me.” Her voice was a sharp contrast from her apparance. The girl’s voice was stern and loud while her body was scrunched in on itself, eyes glued to the desk. Mary took a glance over the desk and saw the dark fabric of a dress, the hat didn’t even match the girl’s shoes.

“Right.” Mary said. “I’m sorry, just a little... starstruck.” She tried to keep her cool, turning again in her chair and started typing as fast as possible on her little keyboard. The atmosphere was thick with uncomfortable silence and Mary had to make sure not to shiver in the girl’s presence. She scrolled down the list of names and let out a small “ah” when she found your name. Just as quickly as she clicked on it, a pop up window filled the screen

STARK - Access Denined. Call Security

She felt sick; her nerves making her skin pucker as she tried to keep calm. When Mary finally found the courage to move, bile reached through her throat as she saw red eyes looking back.

“Ahh!” Mary was quick to jump out of her chair.

“Fine.” The girl sighed, hand flat on the counter as she took long strides around it. “If you won’t help me.” A red trail flowed through one of the doors; slithering like a snake as it wrapped around the shell shocked receptionist. “I’ll do it myself.”

———

Wanda’s mind had warped, grief and anger become one as she ripped through each and every room of the building. No one was safe from the witch’s wrath as she swung them through various glass panels and equipment. By the third turn she took, guards had given up, opting to instead try desperately to get out of her way.

She had left you at the desk, too transfixed to care and as she heard the various shouts of alarm from down the hallway, she was glad you weren’t in her way.

———

The group of four man were shocked; watching as the two guards dropped their guns and put their hands up for mercy.

“We’ll give you what you want. Please!” One of them - Felix - cried as the woman barreled through the double doors.

Wanda simply flicked her hand and he was sent flying to a wall, his partner following.

“Where is he?” Her accent was thick and the youngest tech almost asked her to repeat herself. “Where is Vision?” The stunned silence only fueled her anger. “You.” Red swirled under one of the men’s feet and lifted him from the ground. “Where?”

If the man could have, he’d be shivering in fear right about now. His life was in the hands of a deranged woman who with a simple flick of her wrist could send him plummeting down ten floors.

Wanda tightened her hold on him in warning and he knew he had to speak.

“Behind us.” He said. “There is a set of double doors, turn left and there’s an examination room.”

“He should be there!” A colleague on his left was shaking as she turn to face him. “He’s not lying.” Wanda let her power swim under him once more beofre gently letting him go.

“Thank you.” She gave a small smile. “Now, go.”

They didn’t have to be told twice.

———

Wanda felt as though she couldn’t breathe, the sight of her dead lover on the table was crippling. Vision was a dark grey; his eyes blank as they stared into her. If it wasn’t for the table itself she would have probably collapsed on to the floor as sobs took over her.

“I cant. I can’t. I -“ The words fell from her lips like a mystical chant. She couldn’t look at him anymore, his body was nothing but an empty shell of parts.

When her body turned to ash; Wanda was ready to die, her last shred of humanity died with Vision. The battlefield would be her final resting place. She chose to spend her last moments hoping that If there was a God that they’d be merciful, that she’d be allowed to spent her afterlife in blissful ignorance.

But instead she woke up.

Five years had passed and she was still there, only now she was alone. It was only after the death of Tony Stark that she let the floodgate of loss fill up her veins. While Thanos was alive, she had a mission; kill him and reverse the snap.

Wanda never imagined the pain that followed. She should have died that day, why couldn’t she have died that day?

Grief had a knack for turning the strongest people into helpless pools of despair.

Vision deserved better. That was what go her up, got her to calm her tears and push herself up. She wasn’t going to let them win. Vision was hers to mourn, to love, and hers to take care of.

She had a new mission, one that was stronger then her need to submit to pain.

But... she needed help carrying him.

———

Your body moved through the halls, following the tethered rope of energy that wrapped around your waist. If it wasn’t for your boots, your feet would have been covered in cuts from the sharp edges of the broken glass that filled the hallways.

The fog had cleared more then before and if you tried hard enough, you might’ve even been able to pull free completely. Wanda was exhausted and the fight had been ripped from you So you let her pull you, let the fog seep through every inch of you.

And as you entered the small room, you forgot you were suppose to care anymore.

“I need you to hold onto his legs.” She said softly, hand stroking his cheek. “Easier to carry both of you.” Your body moved again and you placed a gentle hand onto vision’s ankle.

Wanda wiped the last of her tears away, grabbed onto his arm, and all three of you were lifted off the ground.

———

Hot air blew through Wanda’s hair making her hands continuously push back strands from her face as she walked. The afternoon sun was unrelenting and she had to take several short breaks.

The car was too dangerous to return to - a swarm of agents was not something she wanted to deal with - and controlling someone for almost 24 hour straight took a lot out of her. Her hold on you was weak enough for you to sometimes fully take over, her control turning into a dull ache at the back of your brain.

As she walked in front of you thoughts of running flooded through your brain but the walking had tired your body out, and you were sure that if her little pushes weren’t there, you’d have already collapsed. Even if you had the strength to do it, the empty roads had long ago turned into tall trees and bush. You were in the middle of nowhere and getting loss in the woods with a heartbroken witch was not something you wanted to deal with. So, like a trained puppy, you followed silently behind Vision’s dragging body. It wasn’t hard to keep up, she was as slow as she could be while Vision’s body left a dirt trail.

“Break.” Wanda breathed. Who knew an empty little spot of grass would be so inviting? “Sit.” You felt a small push and follow it down to the ground. You let your fingers grip the direr under them, the cool breeze making you sigh.

“Where-“ The sound of your voice startled both of you but she stayed still. “Where are we going?”

She said nothing, choosing to instead turn on her knees and pull Vision forward by the arms.

“When I was little-“ Wanda smiled to herself as she stared down at Vision. “- I use to dream about this field. Me and Peitro went past it everyday during the summer. It had all these small flowers growing.” You listen intently as she giggles, eyes losing focus as she is hit with the memory. “I always tried to sneak past the fence... but, I was alway stopped by someone.” Her mouth twitches and you feel the pulsing return in your neck. “It’s probably nothing but dirt now, like everything.”

“Where are we going, Wanda?” You try to keep your voice soft, afraid of ruining the small moment as you reached out for her but she was quick to stop you, hand glowing red and inches away from your face.

“Don’t.” She warns. You nod in silent apology.

“We’re not far from a road.” Wanda let’s her hand fall back to her side. “I want you go and call whoever you need to.” You’re almost startled when her control leaves fully from your body, it almost feels empty. “Tell them what I did, or don’t, I don’t care. I have what I want.”

“Wanda -“

“Please.” The crack in her voice makes tears pool in your eyes. “Just go.”

You stand on shaking legs. The world was spinning and you felt as though you had just gotten off a rollercoaster but you tried to steady yourself. Unsure of where to go, you turn to her once more for guidance and she simply points behind you.

Your conscious wouldn’t let you leave. Wanda was tired and you were afraid of leaving her alone. Regardless of what she did; you knew you couldn’t blame her, she had lost everyone.

In a way, so did you.

“I’m sorry about Vision.” Wanda looked up again and gave you a small nod. “About Pietro, about everyone. I wish it was different.”

“Me too, Stark.” She let her fingers wrap around your hand and squeezed. The warmth from the dock returned and you couldn’t help but give her a small grin of gratitude. “I meant what I said at the funeral.”

Both of you were so wrapped up in your own little bubble, you didn’t even question why the birds stopped.

————

Tag list (open, just ask)

@white-wolf-buckaroo @y-napotat

All my stuff is open, and I’m always happy to hear from people so feel free to let me know what ya thought. I always get stuck halfway through writing but I hope it wasn’t too hard to read.

Next chapter will be fun.