crackinglamb

[crackinglamb]

ok anyways. post this beast

[crackinglamb]

"kung pow penis," a phrase commonly used in reblogs to indicate utter disdain for OP, has twelve letters, each of which (traditionally) must be supplied by a different user. the unanimity of disdain indicated by these twelve unrelated users has strong parallels to the requirement of unanimity for a jury—also traditionally of twelve—to arrive at a verdict. in this essay i will

[crackinglamb]

People who call u without warning for non serious reasons are so scary like if you call me without texting me first im fully assuming you’re in a saw trap or something

[crackinglamb]

I think a lot about how we as a culture have turned “forever” into the only acceptable definition of success.

Like… if you open a coffee shop and run it for a while and it makes you happy but then stuff gets too expensive and stressful and you want to do something else so you close it, it’s a “failed” business. If you write a book or two, then decide that you don’t actually want to keep doing that, you’re a “failed” writer. If you marry someone, and that marriage is good for a while, and then stops working and you get divorced, it’s a “failed” marriage.

The only acceptable “win condition” is “you keep doing that thing forever”. A friendship that lasts for a few years but then its time is done and you move on is considered less valuable or not a “real” friendship. A hobby that you do for a while and then are done with is a “phase” - or, alternatively, a “pity” that you don’t do that thing any more. A fandom is “dying” because people have had a lot of fun with it but are now moving on to other things.

I just think that something can be good, and also end, and that thing was still good. And it’s okay to be sad that it ended, too. But the idea that anything that ends is automatically less than this hypothetical eternal state of success… I don’t think that’s doing us any good at all.

[crackinglamb]

It's such an amazing feeling when someone picks up on something in your writing that you 100% intended but didn't think people would notice. Like, YES!! My writing properly conveyed the thing it was supposed to!!! You are so awesome for noticing that!!! I am so awesome for writing that!!! I feel so good about my story now!!!!

[crackinglamb]

I am exceptionally lucky in that my parents never hit me, grounded me, confiscated my things, banned me from my hobbies or threatened any of these actions to make me behave as a kid. as an adult it has made me realise how very very long a road most people have to traverse before they can take a statement like 'no rule that must be enforced by threat is legitimate' seriously.

[crackinglamb]

I was not made for capitalism I was made for having tea and cakes and talking about fictional man cock

[crackinglamb]

req'd by @vinegar-on-main

it's acceptable range

text: Half Full? Half Empty? It's .005" out of tolerance

[crackinglamb]

Celestine. Deposit : Balkan velayat, Beineu-Kyr. Turkmenistan

[crackinglamb]

I am begging the FDA to require that companies CANNOT just put "spices" as an ingredient but have to label the spices.

"Spices" can mean "this has some oregano and black pepper in it" or it can mean "this has cumin cayenne and paprika and if you eat this you will be sick in bed in pain for a week" for me.

Seriously, this is an allergy issue and a huge oversight on the part of corporations.

Require detailed labeling of spices used in packaged foods NOW.

[crackinglamb]

Congratulations! You have been magically transported into the world of a vintage tv series. The universe has also decided that you’re going to be a new plot important character and regular on the show.

Spin the wheel to see which show you are transported into.

Thought it'd be fun to make one of those spin the wheel polls using some of the many shows that were submitted for our hottest vintage tv star tournament.

[crackinglamb]

What a nefarious little face

[crackinglamb]

*faux leather no animals were harmed! :)

[crackinglamb]

*faux leather no animals were harmed! :)