#i still don't know why it accepted negatives as not being 0 when it was moving on diagonals and vertically but not horizontally.

[loveletterworm]

It's probably fine but everytime i do something like this i feel like it will be weighed against my soul one day

[beevean]

I've seen stans claiming issue #67 gets to take place after Frontiers and so there was a huge time skip of months based only in the fact Sonic called Amy to lunch as they apparently spend a time without meet each other (???) (Is not it some long running gag in the games that the characters can take long weeks or months to see each other again, thus being already used to this?)

But why?? Why is it so important to set this passage of time?! Do they are really desperate in make the link between games and comics? Because that really makes the comic's narrative sound and look pretty worse:

1- It would mean then that Surge and Kit has been a far more time hidding in Eggman's abandoned base than you would expect, that makes them look even more lazy losers than they already do and clash a lot more with the image of Thirsty For Revenge the comics insist in pass, since they moved NOT a finger in almost half a year (???) (Idk the exact time they want to claim and much less I care) But it makes the arguably near 0 effort of them become a surely negative effort.

2- So then, Blaze is still in vacation in Sonic's world??? Really? She just forgot her kingdom? Are the Sol Emeralds just in Sonic's world as if there was no risk of the universe to collapse (okay, that's a more overkill than what the game really states) if the Chaos Emeralds are reunited and put close to them? Just like that? As if she wasn't all afraid of get some vacantion in the start?

3- Then Mimic has already gone in missions with the DC for real, right? He's bonding with them, right? Surprisingly, there were NO real volunteers after all this time before Surge and Kit finally met Clutch, heard his plan, came to accept his conditions and just gone to the Restoration HQ by the front door, (assuming any of these step even passed by Surge's father head) right? Or, if had, then they left... Geez, guess a bossy rude bitch with a rock hard head can't be a inspiring leader after all, what a surprise, no?

4- The only positive thing of this time skip ideia is that it explains why everyone is so chill of the drooling psychic walking around as well as make no objections to him about use his powers... And why Silver is so chill after the whole fiasco... Buuuuuut, now he's acting Just Exactly the way Lanolin accused him to act when she made the scandal to kick him out the Diamond Cutters (Not only the absence of security helmets or vests, he's playing with the food of the thousands of hungry kids he meant to help, Ian Flynn, a master of self sabotage)

Btw, sorry for this rant, feel free to just ignore if you prefer... And sorry for bringing the Lanolin discourse all over again...

Now that I think about it, it's been a year since Frontiers came out and IDW still hasn't referenced it. Even considering that it takes multiple months for issues to be finalized, I'd say enough time has passed that anything Flynn and Stanley have written since, say, December 2022 has been released. So huh, not even a small reference to that talkative moon, or anything to reflect the supposed new life goal of the gang. It's like it's not canon after all :)

Anyway. Time skips in IDW are indicated. This is how we know that the camping arc takes place months after the beginning of the MV arc because the apocalypse lasted the whole winter, and how we can say that it's complete bullshit because Sonic should have been dropped dead from exhaustion. No time indication, no significant time skip. This is a moot point for me, so I don't have much to add.

[sophieinwonderland]

hi o/ jus wana start by saying dis is jus semi incoherent rambling of a sleeby oupy who didnt get to eat 5 borgars for dinner.

i find the anti endo point of “just doing it for attention” so weird

for one its really disconected from real life, like, attention is a basic need fir our body, its why solutary confinment is such good tourture. its like saying “theyre just doing it to get food” :l dumb argument, evyone needs and withholding food because someones starving is an evil thing to do, an so is ignoring someone who’s in need of social interaction.

and two, its blatantly wrong. like, we’ve told 0 people irl about being a system, we’ve only told like, 3 online friends, and we never talk about system stuff with them still cuz we’re scared of loosing those friends for being too weird. we pretty much never post about it on our blog an besides the blog description no one wud probably ever know. the one time someone guessed we’re a system in a discord servr i had a full anxiety attack an avoided any interaction for 2 weeks even tho they were accepting, an then when we finaly went back to talking there i made sure we had any trace of system stuff wiped from the servr profile an deleted the messages that made them ask and only just showed that all again after 2 months of keeping everything hidden. we’re terrified of people we know knowing we’re a system or getting attention cuz of tgat.

tho we’re definitly on the extreme end for that (mostly me tbh… the social isolation and abandonment issues exo-memories and the body’s trauma from similar irl stuff deff made me super scared about this) but its a pretty similar experience for a lot of systems from wut ive seen where telling ppl is pretty much an act of compleat trust an usualy very anxiety inducing.

besides, if someone really wus just after attention, they could just post a incorrect fact online or a really dumb take. thats much easier an will get a lot more attention than faking being a system ever could. like, saying something like “reading is bourgeoisie” on a semi popular post will be a thousand times better at getting u attention than being a system ever could.

theres so much more i wana say about this, like the ableism inherent to that argument point, or the way its linked to child abuse, but phone keyboard is stupid and terrible and im too hungy to think well enough to write out those points properly an do them justice.

anyways, i hope u have a great day/night depending on when u read this.

Right! And if they're claiming people are wanting positive attention, I don't see that as being that hard either.

Like, if someone wants to talk to people on the internet about stuff, there are spaces out there for literally anything and anyone. You're not going to get more attention for being a system than you would for being outspoken in a fandom or a religion or any other social group you're a part of.

People who want attention... don't need to pretend to have people in their head to get it. And the attention you would get for that is often going to be negative because a lot of people are sanist and pluralphobic. But as you mention, it's not even the best way to get negative attention when there are so many actual troll-y things you can do.

You can find hundreds of communities online with people who will support you and give you attention for your takes on various topics! Or you can find hundreds more who will hate you if you push the right buttons!

There's just... no logical reason to fake being plural for attention.

And isn't this, again, the very same claims that have always been made against the LGBTQ community?

It's actually kind of funny how that happens, isn't it?

The people who are getting attention are generally the ones who most conform to society. It's not plural or trans people. It's the ones who do their best to fit in and be like everyone else in their group. Meanwhile, people who have identities that diverge from the norm are often left outcasts and shunned by peers.

And yet it's the latter group that's accused of attention seeking?

It makes no sense. 🤷‍♀️

[recomvery]

Hi! Your blog is great! It really helps me because recently I started to go on dates again (the last time was before the pandemic) and I hear a lot of negative comments about my appearance... Men do comments about my gap front teeth, body hair on my arms, my short hair, thin eyebrows. Why are they doing this? I am not perfect, they aren't perfect. We are humans. Is it because they watch online all these perfect women with filters and makeup? I will never comment on someone's appearance in a negative way. And if they don't like me, it's okay, but why they ask me on date and be mean? It hurts hearing all these things... It took me years to build my confidence because I was very insecure when I was teenager. I take care of myself, eat healthy, exercise, reading books, have my job and I have a good character. I know I am not a 10 but they make me feel like a zero... I am very romantic and all I want is a good man to spend our lives together but I don't think I will find him. Do other women have similar experiences? And men too. Maybe women act this way too. Are people mean when they go on dates?

Hello dear,

First of all, this is such a good quality question and analysis and I love how vulnerable you are and I think a lot of people can relate to this a lot.

Dating men can be so difficult because a lot of men can be really problematic and sexist about womens bodies and I hate it. I actually found your description of yourself so endearing and cute. It makes me so angry that your dates have been negatively commenting on your body, that's SO messed up. Also it broke my heart when you said you were not a 10 because that rating system is so sexist and I think you are absolutely perfect and enchanting just the way that you are, like every other woman too.

To answer your question: There is nothing "normal" about people being mean to you on a date and you should absolutely not entertain it. Don't let people get away with this. Don't stay in contact or on a date where someone says mean things to you. Get up and leave. Block them. Stand up for yourself and show people that you are confident and love yourself and that you will accept 0 bullshit.

Personally, I have always used dating apps in a way where I texted for a long time with a person before going on a date to see if we are even compatible and so that I knew they were a good person. What I always did is ask men to play a question game and then ask them questions that were important to me such as their political affiliation, if they are ok with gay people, fat women, trans people, etc. I had a list of questions that were important to me in my notes and would try to ask them in a fun, lighthearted way to filter the people I would go on dates with, and STILL I have encountered people making comments about my weight and stuff. Of course, not everyone likes to date that way.

What's way more important than some mens opinion on your looks is your own confidence. It would be cool for you to get to a point where you are so damn confident about your own aesthetics that when someone sais something mean, you can straight up tell them: "LOL, you're wrong, I'm so cute." And leave and not be hurt by it. I am such a huge fan of women that unapologetically love themselves and are very confident, I think it's the best way to live your life.

I hope you're gonna find some cool and nice people to go on dates with ♡ because you are awesome and you deserve it and there is nothing wrong with you. When it comes to dating, know exactly what you want and what you will never accept.

[serenamerce]

a lot of sun conjunct natal aspects.

i really like it all.

i like that it's weird and terrible and alienating.

i like that i know i'll embrace it all and find a way.

it's just reeeeaally intense.

it feels like being on hard drugs in a quiet and small public setting or something.

sensitive. i feel my feelings physically and behold my awareness. too in tune to the feelings and sub/unconscious aspects of things. people.

constant reminders of how i'm hard to love. scary. weird. disruptive.

i feel like doing the strong thing because it'll hurt and also yield something good.

it's so weird when something good looks like empty hands.

i can appreciate this but it sounds so chaotic.

undone. it seems like i'm always healing. always overcoming.

everything got deeper, too.

i might be all of these things and more but i love and hold my innocence with an unmatched ferocity.

sitting in the darkkness, which usually i would explore lovingly, curiously,

yet too innately pure to go back to actually believing in pessimism and negativity.

a very small flame, in all of this depth in all of this

in this richness,

but too willing to love and be and accept and even enjoy and explore through it to be considered "among the perfect, the great, the "rich"".

i really just want to enjoy this. even if i cry all night. they're my tears so i love them.

i just want to feel good about all of me. even the parts of me that want to break everything just to match the outside with the inside.

i'll get barbell plates instead.

and i hope the entire universe knows i do it all for me. me.

i am my favorite piece of art.

when i'm undone and undesirable and tripping psychically/emotionally/mentally and the ways that be, when i'm a monster, when i'm broken or admitting to already being aware of that, when the optimistic demeanor wears off, when i'm so disturbed that i could puke, when i'm so disturbing that the mind rejects me

as if i am not

when all of my confidence is gone when i can't find or justify the reasons why when i don't care when i know it's temporary but it doesn't matter because it's horrible when my skin crawls when even a hater couldn't relate to me when i am the wrongest

i still sincerely love myself

i still honestly love time in the mirror

i still feel entitled to indulging my awareness in what i like

i still rub me and nurture me and welcome me and hear me out and bandage me and celebrate me and try not to take reaction from others so personally that i become an all powerful angry nerd i still do my best i still remember that i don't have a job i have a way i still honor what i think and what voice i want to express i still see the above 0 and i still raise me up to glory in debt i still remember the eternal knowingness i still believe i deserve accurate reflections of who i am i still won't sell my soul and buy into despondency i still listen to my inner child i still promise me the dreams i've always wanted i still am

i still love myself

i don't want to feel like i can only love myself unconditionally in isolation anymore

i don't want to lighten up and feel hopeful and full of faith once i've ran away from everything and everyone i like

i don't want to wait to celebrate me the way i feel inclined to once i've burnt every bridge

i don't want to feel inauthentic when i do things because i am intrinsically motivated

i don't want to feel like i can't be my self just because.

i don't want to wait until i'm all alone to make it clearer to myself that i can be unconditionally.

i don't want to alienate myself to prove that i don't need anyone and that i am the only one that can give me true love.

i want to be clear about the fact that i will love and romance and forgive and respect and protect myself unconditionally eternally.

it doesn't feel good but i'm here and that makes me happy. that makes, even this, a celebration.

[enjxxl]

|| jake x reader

genre : angst ; idol

pairing : idol!reader x idol!jake

warnings : crying ; reader is insecure about themselves : fluff towards the end if you squint hehe

word count : 2.2k

note : sorry for any miss spellings, i don't do any proof reading. also this is written to where corona never happened.

you never realized how hard it was after your debut, even harder than your trainee days. especially when you debuted through a survival show.

all throughout the survival show you were nervous if you would even make it to debut as you felt, compared to the other members on the show, you lacked talent. during the last episode of the show you had lost all hope as the members were being announced, your hope slowly going down the drain. and as you stood with one other person you felt it in you that you weren't going to debut. but as the last person was announced it hit with surprise. your name was announced. it all felt surreal to you and you couldn't believe what the judges had said. had they really said your name?

you had looked towards the other members standing to the side, grins on their faces as they motioned for you to join them. when it finally had hit you that you made it, you couldn't help but burst into tears as you thanked the judges for giving you the opportunity to debut and thanking all the fans who had voted for you.

now, as you sit in the waiting room after your debut stage you couldn't help but feel giddy. the sweat rolled down your face and down your back but you didn't particularly care, you were just happy you finally had the chance after the 5 years you had spent training and working for this day.

"how'd it feel, y/n," your manager sat down next to you as they scrolled through their phone, looking at what was next on the schedule.

"surreal," you sighed out, the exhaustion rolling through you in one hit. as much as you loved the feeling of performing and seeing all your smiling fans you couldn't help but loath the exhaustion that came with it.

"glad to hear, next on the schedule is a variety show so get ready for that," your manager walked out leaving you by yourself in the small room. because you were the only girl in your group, you had to use a separate waiting room from the rest of the boys but you were honestly glad as it gave a moment of peace from their loud and bubbly personalities.

you finished getting ready for the next schedule and walked out with your manager when he had come back to get you. you had dressed down in comfier clothing as you knew you were just going to change again as soon as you got to the other building.

"y/n! i can't wait to watch the performance of us tonight!" you met up with the other boys as you walked out of the building and you agreed with the tall boy. jake, the tall boy, was the first person you had made a connection with during the survival show. you were thankful that jake was the first since he had helped you all throughout the show. when you were struggling with anything, jake was always their to help you. you were growing so fond of the boy that you couldn't help but slowly grow feelings for him. of course you would never be able to tell him since you were both in the same group but you couldn't help what your heart was feeling for him. you knew you had a 0% chance with him and as much as it hurt to admit and come to terms with, it was better that way.

"i bet it caught you stepping on my foot, jake," you couldn't help but scold him and slap his arm as during the performance he had stepped on your foot twice.

"it was an accident," he pouted, rubbing his arm. you smiled at him and gave him a side hug while you walked outside the building, not noticing the cheeky smile he had given you as you wrapped your arm around him. however, what you had not expected as soon as you walked out was to be bombarded, the flashing lights shocked you and blinded you for a few seconds as you instinctively hid behind one of your members, burying your face behind his back so as to not be blinded again. you were pushed and pulled from every direction as you tried to hold onto him but you were soon separated from the other boys the only thing holding back the fans were two bodyguards, one on each side. you lifted your head and continued walking, trying hard not to stumble and fall from the blinding lights.

your heart race picked up as you kept walking as it felt like it was taking forever to get to the van which wasn't even parked far away from the building you were exiting. when you finally made it into the car you threw yourself inside and sat next to a worried jake.

"hey, you ok? who would've thought it would already be like this," he looked at you, a worried expression on your face as you breathed a sigh of a relief as you saw all seven of them in the car as well.

"yeah, im fine, i just got lost in there," you sunk yourself into the car seat as the van started driving to the next destination. the other members gave you worried expressions and after reassuring them once more they all either went to looking at their phones or sleeping during the short car ride.

the only one who never looked away was jake. he noticed your shaking hands as you held them trying to not make it too obvious you were so shaken up about what had just happened. he grabbed your hand in his rubbing his thumb across the back of your hand to help calm you down.

"i'm ok, really," you whispered out the reassurance but you honestly didn't know who exactly you were trying to reassure, jake or yourself.

the rest of the schedules wrapped up nicely and as you all arrived at the dorm you immediately went into your room, throwing yourself onto your bed. you were exhausted from the first day of jam packed schedules and all you wanted to do was rest as you had to be up in only a couple of hours. the dorm was filled with busy sounds as all the members caught up with each other before it finally died down as everyone had been tired and wanted to rest.

as exhausted as you were, you were anxious. the debut performance was finally up and you wanted to see what the reactions were so naturally you had searched up the performance. you watched the performance one time all the way through, beaming at your members. they all looked so good and you did in fact notice the camera was able to get in frame jake stepping onto your foot not only once but twice. you giggled to yourself as you saw your face scrunch up slightly in pain and jake showed a shocked expression. it only lasted for a second as the camera cut to a different shot but it was still a funny moment you caught.

your nervousness amped up as you scrolled through the comments, most of them were positive but there were a few that stood out to you.

sh**** commented

why did hybe even let a girl like that debut? she has no talent and she's so unattractive. ridiculous.

ex****** commented

the other members must be embarrassed to have a girl like her in the group, her dancing sucks and her vocals are non existent how is she even a main vocal???

even though there were more positive comments about the performance you couldn't help but let the negative comments get to you. tears welled up in the corner of your eyes and they finally started dropping as you kept reading the comments. all the negative comments were about you. your mind couldn't help but blur all the words together in your mind ; talentless, embarrassing, unfit, untalented. it was all overwhelming and you couldn't help the sob that left your mouth. you covered your mouth, looking up towards the door and waiting in silence for a few seconds to make sure no one was coming and let the tears flow down your face.

thinking about all the events that unfolded earlier in the day, you couldn't help but feel engulfed with all the emotions you had kept inside of you throughout the day. you had looked forward to your debut for years and even though you enjoyed being around your members and you know you had fans that accepted you and loved you but it still hurt to know you had so many who hated you.

a knock at the door halted your running thoughts and put them on pause as you looked up, finding a concerned jake peeking through the door.

"y/n? what's wrong, oh my god are you ok?" you were stilled in shock, not expecting jake to suddenly come knocking at your door. he came in kneeling down to your level and grabbing your face in his hands.

"i thought you were asleep," you muttered up a response as you tried to wipe your tears, failing in the process as even more tears fall down.

"hey hey, you're doing ok. i promise," jake tried wiping your tears but his efforts were in vain as his fingers were being drenched with your tears. as soon as those words left his mouth you couldn't but let out a sob as the weight of his words hit you. you didn't feel like you were doing ok and the thoughts went from still to running again.

jake, seeing that his words only made it worse, wrapped his arms around you whispering even more encouraging words in your ear. you wrapped your own arms around him and crumbled in his embrace.

"they don't like me jake, maybe i'm really not fit to be in enhypen," you stuttered out your feelings. once jake wrapped his arms around you, you knew it was over. jake knew how to make you weak and he knew how to make you vulnerable without him even trying. you hated how he could see through you but you were also grateful. grateful that even if he didn't reciprocate the same emotions as you did, all you really needed was his presence.

"i don't know what's going on behind that pretty little head of yours but i need you to know that you are fit for enhypen. it may not seem like it but we all need you and enhypen wouldn't be enhypen without you. you are perfect the way you are," jake always knew just the right words to make you feel at peace. your thoughts finally stopped and dispersed, his words filling the earlier negative ones.

"thank you, jake i don't know what i would do without you," you hugged him tighter than before and you both finally let go of each other, him wiping the last few tears off of your face.

"how about we get some sleep? we have to be up in a few so let's get as much rest as we can," you agreed with him and you both got up. he left your room not long after and you swiftly got into bed, pulling the covers up to your shoulders, the only thing peeping out from under the blanket was your head. not long after jake had left, he came barging back in, scaring you as you were just about to fall asleep. you watched as he laid a blanket and a pillow down on the floor next to your bed, getting under the blanket and resting his head on the pillow. you looked up at you as you were peeking over the bed and gave you a smile.

"what are you doing?" you whispered.

"im sleeping right here, i don't want you alone on your first night after debut and plus, everyone else has a roomate anyway," he gave you one last glance before closing his eyes and getting comfortable on the floor. why did he always know what to do? why did he always make you feel special?

you ignored your fast beating heart and laid back down in your own bed. after a few minutes of silence you still laid awake, staring at the ceiling of your room.

"jake?"

"hmm?"

"can i hold your hand?" you let your hand rest over the side of your bed as the weight of your words settled into the quiet night and you couldn't help but get nervous. you didn't know why you were getting so bold but you wanted to be comforted and held. and holding hands was close enough.

after a few seconds you finally felt his hands grip yours tightly and you felt his warmth comfort you in mere seconds. it wasn't long before you had fallen asleep, your body shifting closer towards the edge of the bed so you could hold jake's hand more comfortably. jake, however, had not succumbed to the night, him looking up at you as he let out a sigh.

"what do i do, y/n? i really like you."

[south-park-meta]

One thing I really don't understand is the common misconception about Kyle having to put up with Stan's emotional issues.

When it really isn't really all that much. And Kyle usually separates himself because he doesn't know how to deal with it.

Kenny dies, Raisins, Your getting old.

Where Stan has to put up with alot of more Kyles emotional issues. His rivalry with Cartman. I can see him bitching about it to Stan on regular basis.

Even if he disagrees with him Stan stays by his side.

Cartmanland, The List, CBAA, Obama Wins.

Also, Stan keeps it to himself. Kyle lashes out and causes havoc.

Could it be that Stan didn't really know very well how to give himself boundaries. Just the Cartmanland episode. We get Kyle whining about it how Cartman won a million dollars and he how is a good person and Cartman isn't, almost the whole episode. He even dies almost from overdramatizing so much.

Stan stays by his side, the whole time. He doesn't even complain once, that Kyle should get his shit together. If the roles where reversed Kyle wouldn't put up with this shit, even back in Season 5.

Is it because Stan sees himself more as the comforter and Kyle more as being comforted?

This is kind of tough because I agree that Stan has more patience than Kyle and is more emotionally mature than Kyle. And I agree that Kyle doesn't constantly put up with Stan's emotional issues, but I don't think the way Stan goes about it is healthy. I do think you're right that Stan would rather comfort people than be comforted, too. To start: I don't think Kyle should have put up with Stan in YGO/Ass Burgers. I don't even think he should have put up with him more in eps like Raisins. He tried being nice to Stan in both cases, he tried tough love in both cases, and in both cases Stan gave him squat for a response. In YGO in particular, spending time with Stan was actively keeping him from enjoying anything. Stan was actually mean to him in Ass Burgers, and Kyle values Stan's opinion of him a LOT. Like a lot a lot, like caring if Stan thinks his hat is dumb a lot. Kyle gets a lot of bullying from Cartman and feels the most an outsider because of his religion. I don't think Kenny or Cartman would've cared too much if Stan said 'Fuck you, you're a piece of shit', but this is a judgment call that Kyle expects from everyone BUT Stan. That's something that cuts DEEP. Cutting Stan off for his emotional health was fine. If Stan actually apologized and improved his behavior it seems like Kyle would've accepted it, too. Stan really wasn't negatively affected the same way. In Cartmanland, he gets Kyle's complaints even if he doesn't care nearly as much, and he's perfectly happy trying to sneak behind Cartman's back. In CBAA I think he keeps playing games while Kyle uses him as a sounding board. Kyle IS likely annoying him, but Stan knows he's working through his guilt to do the right thing. He knows that it is a temporary state and Kyle's coming around soon, versus YGO where it's just how Kyle thinks Stan is going to be forever since he got an official diagnosis. I think by and large these things honestly didn't bother Stan that much for one reason or another. Kyle complaining about Cartman IS a bit different, though, and it is something that we can see in more recent seasons. More recently, he's tried getting Stan to weigh in on his fights with Cartman, to act as tie-breaker, and Kyle's gotten an effective 'Why the fuck should I do anything?' in response. In the past I don't think Stan cared about Kyle complaining about Cartman either, tbh. He doesn't like Cartman and loves Kyle, so in the past it was probably more 'fond exasperation' coupled with getting in on it himself when Cartman annoyed him too, than really hating that Kyle did it. In recent seasons though, it's been like when you suddenly realize there's a little hum, a background noise, and all of a sudden it's LOUD because it's ALL you can focus on. Stan is sick of negativity. He's sick of fighting. He's sick of having causes. He's sick of having to seem functionally well. He is still hurt by Kyle, and that drains the 'fondness' out of the exasperation. I don't think that Kyle was crossing any boundaries with what Stan wasn't emotionally fine with, until Stan started shutting him down on complaining about Cartman in very recent episodes. Stan crossed emotional-burden boundaries for what Kyle found acceptable in Raisins and in YGO, and at least imo, when Stan is mentally in a good place, Kyle never did that. Maybe sometimes Stan should've redirected him, but genuinely I don't think it's beyond what he's capable of/what he likes dealing with when he's not in a very dark mental spot. When it came down to it, he did draw a boundary when he couldn't stand it by not getting involved in Kyle and Cartman's recent arguments. But Stan DOES have trouble with boundaries and he DOES like being more of a fixer than being fixed. He's grown up very aware of the fact that people have their own problems. And so they don't need his, so he does avoid complaining about his feelings, particularly when they're not connected to a cause that he intends to fix himself. And he wants people to like him, desperately. So if he can fix their problems, that will prove his

worth, it will prove his aptitude, it will prove he can fix his own problems, making the whole thing a terrible cycle. He doesn't want to ask for help because other people need help. He helps others, which proves he can do things without asking for help himself. Ideally Stan would be better at opening up when he has small problems, instead of only trying to talk about the ones that are so large that he doesn't even know where to even start in explaining them. When his feelings are big enough they're like 'How do I go on when nothing makes me happy' or 'I feel like my body's shutting down', that's just such a big difference from not usually talking about being sad at all. When it comes to Stan actually expressing emotions, not like, dumping on his friends calling everything shit, I do think he needs Kyle to be more receptive. And I do think Kyle gets uncomfortable when Stan's sad, and he doesn't know how to handle it, in part because Stan usually handles things well. But I also don't think it's fair to expect Kyle to know how to handle Stan's jump in emotions going from 'eh yeah that kind of sucks but it's fine' most days to all at once being more in line with 'How do I keep living?'. I think you're right that Stan really doesn't emotionally dump on Kyle or anyone else too much (though he's doing it more lately) but when he DOES he can go from 0 to 60 in no time flat. Having open communication about feelings is one of those things they both need to work on for sure. I want them to end up best friends again and I think time apart will help them do that. Coming back together as a choice instead of just because it's always been that way would be good for them. And hopefully they both get better at actually talking about feelings.

[eeemarvel]

In Hero Reform (and in one of your lovely replies to me), it's mentioned that Viktor wore a very revealing hero costume as a teen, which Yakov and Lilia allowed him to do once he threw a tantrum, because they wanted him to feel better .

In your very kind (and funny!) reply to the horror movie ask, it's mentioned that it didn't even occur to Lilia that Yuri P could find the horror movie scary.

What do you think of Yakov and Lilia's parenting style?

(No need to answer if you don't want to/don't feel like it, ofc!😊)

😂😂😂😂😂

This is fantastic. So, I have absolutely no idea why I made Yakov, Lilia AND Celestino Victor and YP's parents. It was just an unexplainable knee jerk reaction when I was first writing this and it's admittedly a bit silly but idc. Also, as time went on, it just made more sense in my mind for their characters. It was just easier for three out of depth, overworked adults to raise 2 kids than it was for one to do it by themselves.

Yakov was not always the parental figure that he is now, someone who is firm, but mostly fair, loving, and very protective. He originally tried to raise Victor and Yuri P. the way he taught heroes: with a firm fist and no mercy. He was far too emotionally distant for a father, unwilling to accept when the boys made mistakes, and valued discipline over everything else. But, of course, Victor and Yuri did not respond too well to being held under a thumb, headstrong as they are. Many many tantrums (Yuri's), fights, and slammed doors helped Yakov to learn that he needed to take a slightly more gentle approach.

Old Yakov: This is the second time this week that I've caught you sneaking out. That means you will spend two months in this room and you've got dish duty until I say so.

Lil' Victor: But—

Old Yakov: This isn't a discussion.

Lil' Victor at nobody because Yakov has left: YOU NEVER LISTEN TO ME!

After the terror that is Yuri P. entered their lives, Yakov quickly learned that some changes needed to be made...

New Yakov: Now, why am I watching you climb through a bedroom window right now, Yura?

Slightly smaller Yuri: .... the front door was locked.

New Yakov: Naturally. And what were you doing at this hour?

SS Yuri: Nothing... I just wanted to see Mila.

New Yakov: Unless Mila is a vampire, I'm positive she'll be more than happy to see you during the day, and if not, she's welcome to have dinner with us anytime.

SS Yuri: ...Really??

New Yakov: Certainly. That is of course after your punishment has lifted which will be two months from now. You're taking Victor's dish duty starting tomorrow. We'll continue this discussion in the morning. Good night.

SS Yuri: But—

Lilia is quite similar to Yakov when it comes to parenting but her thing is that she has a very skewed perspective about what she finds to be upsetting or triggering. So, while Yakov was unfazed by tears, Lilia was positively baffled.

Old Lilia: There will be no dessert until all of your toys have been properly put away, and that's final.

Teeniest Yuri: ｡･ﾟヾ(✦థ ｪ థ)ﾉ｡ﾟ･｡

Old Lilia: W-w-what? What's happened?? Are you hurt? Why are you crying?????

Teeniest Yuri: ｡･ﾟヾ(✦థ ｪ థ)ﾉ｡ﾟ･｡*intensifies*

Old Lilia: What did I say??? Celestino, what did I say??

Celestino, who is somehow more "normal" than Yakov and Lilia really helps out in situations like this so that Lilia can learn and adjust:

Lilia 2.0: Your dessert is waiting for you, Yura. We'll eat together when you've finished putting all of your toys away.

Teeniest Yuri who knows he's not gonna starve: °˖✧◝(⁰▿⁰)◜✧˖°

For Celestino, trying to parent with Yakov and Lilia is like Chris Pratt trying to subdue those dinos. Yakov is very militaristic, disciplined, and emotionally distant by nature. Lilia is the same, possibly more so as she was trained at the Guild of Champions. They're both not great at dealing with emotions: Yakov doesn't pick up on when people have them and Lilia doesn't realize that pain, death, mortal danger, and significant life events aren't the only reasons why someone may feel strong emotions. When Yakov does realize that someone is having BIG feelings, he sometimes just... ignores them/doesn't acknowledge them at all... something that he still struggles with but is better at now than before.

But Celestino is just a guy who has great abilities and trained those abilities at the Grand Prix like most heroes. He understands people. He understands when someone is hurt or when there is more to their feelings than what they express through words. So, like a normal compassionate/empathetic person. Celestino started at 0 (maybe 3 or 4) when he became a parent while Yakov and Lilia started at negative 10.

Celestino: Oooh, all dressed up? Where are you guys going?

Lilia: I'm taking the kids to see Naomi.

Celestino: ... giant mutant lizard owner Naomi or pastry chef Naomi?

Lilia: The former.

Celestino: Ok, perhaps don't????

Lilia, huffing agitatedly: Fine. But it's the pastry chef that has the license to kill.

It was also Celestino that reluctantly took Victor's side when he threw a tantrum over his super suit. Lilia and Yakov's argument was that a hero suit was a uniform, a mark of power and trustworthiness that should stand out in a crowd. And not stand out like that as a teenager in the fishbowl that is the world of super heroes. Celestino agrees with this but.... there are exceptions.

Celestino reasoned that a lot of Victor's choices were taken away from him as a kid and that he didn't have the chance to explore and grow the way normal kids did. Victor experienced a lot of trauma and he wanted to take control of his life again. He wanted to feel happy, confident, and strong again. If that meant Victor had to wear a slightly risque super suit... then so be it??? It wasn't too bad after all. And Victor was a good kid, a hero, and his taste in fashion changed like the wind. He'd want a new super suit by the end of the winter anyway. Teen Victor rarely threw huge tantrums. He may have shouted back out of anger, whined a bit, or tried to plead with puppy dog eyes, but he rarely ever went off on a screaming, tearful tirade. That was Yuri P.'s thing. So when Victor snapped, Celestino knew that this was a big deal to him.

Somehow the three manage to balance each other out. And the boys know that they are well loved even if 2/3 of their parents have a funny way of showing it.

[cosmik-homo]

I posted 21,560 times in 2021

1510 posts created (7%)

20050 posts reblogged (93%)

For every post I created, I reblogged 13.3 posts.

I added 1,828 tags in 2021

#undescribed - 1347 posts#cr spoilers - 111 posts#critical role spoilers - 104 posts#:0 - 48 posts#oh my god - 42 posts#deltarune spoilers - 39 posts#row spoilers - 38 posts#quotes - 37 posts#alfredcore - 32 posts#cowards glory - 30 posts - 1347 posts

#cr spoilers - 111 posts

#critical role spoilers - 104 posts

#:0 - 48 posts

#oh my god - 42 posts

#deltarune spoilers - 39 posts

#row spoilers - 38 posts

#quotes - 37 posts

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Longest Tag: 137 characters

#בלי קשר לזה שהיא משקיעה את כל הנשמה ואת כל הפאקינג בריאות שלה בסה וללמד זה החיים שלה ותלמידים שלה שכבר השתחררו עכשיו זוכרים אותה ומפרגנים

My Top Posts in 2021

#5

When people talk about "Star Wars Day" I like it but it's so funny to me they have one centralized day. Star Trek people celebrate seventeen times a year. Star trek people are always down to party.

242 notes • Posted 2021-03-16 10:56:23 GMT

#4

This is why Sazed didn't want to teach electricity to scadrial

296 notes • Posted 2021-05-28 05:42:22 GMT

#3

ok as local tmp apologist YES it is VERY MUCH aout spock being gay but its also bout spock being a GAY JEW. he is SEARCHING FOR A GOD TO CONDEMN OR ACCEPT HIM AND HIS LOVE. AND HE FINDS GOD IS NOT IN THE THUNDERSTORM OR THE DRY WORD, IT IS NOT IN DRY ADHERENCE TO THE RULES BECAUSE THEY ARE RULES, BUT PROTECTING THEIR BEAUTY AND THEIR MEANING OF THE WORLD

343 notes • Posted 2021-04-18 17:49:52 GMT

#2

Seriously I need people to understand that Spock being miserable in Vulcan society and it is a source of struggle in his life and what not does not mean Vulcan society and culture is inherently negative, wrong, negative and harmful. Not only is that. Completely missing the point of Star Trek and of, like, being a basically enlightened person when it comes to views on the human (e) condition and society and culture, it also dampens Spock's own narrative.

Spock is miserable in Vulcan society and with Vulcan norms because it is not right for him. Because his family and community sucks, because he is discriminated against for his mixed heritage, and not accommodated or given space for his human related traits and needs. He is miserable I'm Vulcan society and under the classic, rigid Vulcan philosophy of emotional inhibitions because of his own life story.

But the ideas themselves are not evil, thru work for some people without being unhealthy and serve their purpose. On a big red planet many people live their lives and let others live, and I can assure you there are communities on Vulcan in that era or after where people like Spock were living different lives.

In the end he still finds value in Vulcan teaching and adjusts them to his level of comfort- look at late movies Spock, making his own path and acting much less rigid, answering Amanda's "how do you feel" and engaging in tomfoolery with Kirk and McCoy while still being Vulcan in his culture and some others aspect of his speech.

Anyways why don't you watch some Tuvok centered episodes and embrace Surak into your hearts. No prophet has ever offered a path who harmed none and a religion that left no frustrated children on the side of the road; just because Spock needed to get out doesn't mean there is any moral basis for thinking you know better than an entire planet and all vulcans should act in a way that fits your worldview

514 notes • Posted 2021-07-10 16:47:49 GMT

#1

prologue to academic books on jewish masculinity im reading: “ In early modern eastern Europe, the ideal Jewish male, the Rabbi or talmudic student, was indeed characterized by qualities that made him very different from, in fact almost  the exact opposite of, the "knight in shining armor" heartthrob of our romantic culture. The East European Jewish ideal of a gentle, timid, and studious male-Edelkayt-moreover, does have origins that are very deeply rooted in traditional Jewish culture, going back at least in part to the Babylonian Talmud. These characteristics, however, were not supposed to render the male even slightly unappealing, let alone "very unattractive." For Peskowitz's American students, even American Jews, the gentleness of the rabbinic male can only be imagined as sexlessness, encoded as unattractiveness, because these students (like most of us) have been molded so thoroughly by the "dominant fiction" 2 of gender that our culture maintains. A gentle, studious, sweet man can only be imagined as old and nearsighted (i.e., castrated?) and could not possibly be attractive sexually. In the readings that follow this introduction, we will see that such a man is interpreted as anything but sexless within rabbinic texts; indeed, he is represented as the paramount desiring male subject and object of female desire.” (explains how this different VALUE and not content change is what we need to understand to understand and recreate in our imaginaitons what old jewish gender cultural view was like)

 Me: ....are you saying. does this mean the way Spock became a sex symbol is the best victory of jewish masculinity in years.

576 notes • Posted 2021-02-17 12:37:40 GMT

Get your Tumblr 2021 Year in Review →

[ramblings-of-a-mad-cat]

soo yeah, I don't know If I Actually gonna Work on The Hogwarts Mystery CYOA or If even Gonna make it public but Let's talk about The Personalities

For starters, The “Personalities” Mechanic affects relationships and The Backstory Of The MC in a way, I don't have names for it so I just gonna number them

Personality Number 1

short-tempered, studious, diciplinated, pessimistic

To start, This Personality Never could get their Potion ruined by Merula, apart from them being a Good student They Will notice it because They're perceptive enough and Will tell Snape, altought It Will depend If They're a Slytherin If Snape actually believes them.

Being in The lawful side of the bar, normally The Stats Relationship would be 0 Before You get an interaction with The Character, but This Personality Will have “-5” for default with Chaotic Characters, altought If The player want to befriend Them with This Personality Tulip Would pick on Them a lot

Also This Personality Is very conflictive so as Other personalities get “-5” in relationship Stats This One gets “-10” because realistically speaking They Will be a very hard person to befriend

Aligns with Gryffindor, Slytherin and Hufflepuff houses

Backstory Of The Personality: Comes from a Family well known in The Magic World, oh well, that was Before Jacob ruined everything. The Principal reason They want to investigate The Cursed vaults Is not exactly because wants to find their brother, Is More Like a Family Pride kind Of Thing, really resentful to Jacob for go with no explanation and leaving dirt in The Family name.

Personality Number Two

Kind, Servicial, Charming

As I Say Before, There's a change in The Relationship default points so Instead Of getting “+5” Relationship points They get “+10” Relationship points.

Aligns with Hufflepuff, Slytherin and Ravenclaw

Basically The Therapist friend, If The Player wants to be a prefect This One Is really indicated for This, Is aware Of People, feelings and wants really badly to help Others. Is probably The Personality that actually gets un Merula's head. Either in a negative way (She feels patronized) or in a “well, maybe You're no so bad” but Obviously to players who don't Like Merula MC totally could lose their cool and tell Merula Off What... yeah, it Will lead to a Situation where Merula totally breaks down, because If even The Most patient person give up on her She doesn't have to have regrets for being with R, r i g h t ?

Backstory Of The Personality: well, This Personality Is for default a Muggleborn who was adopted by a Pureblood Family, and Well, since They were saved They kinda got This Hero complex, Jacob was really protective Of Them and That's Why They want to return The favor to him “You saved me, I'll save You, Ok Jacob?”

Personality Number three

Brave, very black and White mentality, Superficial

They don't get along with shallow Characters Like Rakepick, Ismelda, Jae etc and have for default -5 Relationship with them, They're very distrustful for What gives Of Them in their surface, also They Can't accept The World if ull Of Grays because They either categorizar persons as totally Evil ior totally Good, that leads to idolize and hate when They don't have All The Facts, Lawful side Of things Again but actually can pull it off with Chaotic personalities as long as They don't have a Bad vision on them

Aligns with Gryffindor and Hufflepuff

Backstory Of The Personality: So basically They inherits their black and White Personality Of Jacob, who had a strong sense Of justice and kinda induced their sibling in The Thought there's only Villains and heroes, probably The Personality who has idolized Jacob to The point They Can't accept any despective perspective about him, Their Relationship with Jacob Is linda Like Harry and James in a way? Like their has something to use with discovering Jacob Is not a Hero and neither They are.

I Have ideas for More but I Will tell You Other day, ALSO, This personalities has their own Character Arcs for MC, They Can Get worse or evolve from Them All depends on players options

Okay before I go any further, I just want to say that I really dig this whole concept. It reminds me of the character building system from Oblivion. And speaking of the Elder Scrolls, I sure wish HPHM could be modded. I mean it can, of course, but not to the degree that something like Skyrim can, where people are overhauling the entire game to make it more polished and complex, adding hours worth of content. I’ve seen mods for Skyrim that do exactly what you’re suggesting to the character build system. It would be so cool to have something like this implemented. 

I guess the only issue with a system like this would be the inevitable restrictions that come from having to choose one particular personality type, and that would of course be the drawback. Does the archetype system box you in? Because if it’s just something as simple as starting bonuses and deficits, that works fine. Like if you had to work harder to get certain characters to like you, but it was still possible. If it wasn’t though, that might be a little limiting. People might gravitate toward type one but want to be friendly with characters from type two, and so on. In particular, this would matter for the core three - Jacob, Merula, and Rakepick. How your MC feels about them. 

In any case, I love this whole concept as a kind of “starting bonus” to help you characterize your incarnation of Jacob’s Sibling, because that secondary type? Has a lot in common with Luca. As for Gail, I’d have to say that maybe she’s a blend of types one and three? More aligned with three though. It all brings me back to the core archetypes in gaming: Warriors, Mages, and Rogues. Obviously every character in HPHM is a mage, but in terms of personality and soul, Gail is also a paladin. She may be a Slytherin but for the most part, she leaves all that sneaking and stuff to the gutter rats. Knock down doors and get down to business, that’s her way. Luca? Yeah they’re still a mage. And if a game has a personality system, where you can talk your way out of fights without drawing a weapon, they’d specialize in that. 

[thoughts-from-k]

How to make your friends turn away from you 21+1 tips and tricks

0. Find someone who likes you. It should be a "problematic" person., makes it easier to criticize them later, and show off your perfection (you support and accept every kind of people, and you say it often enough).

1. Tell them how desperately you wish for someone to give you help/advice/constructive critique about something you do. When they do it, turn them off every single time - without exception - telling them you disagree, and you wanted to do it the way you just did.

2. Tell them you wish to find people for things you like doing. If they go with you, and try, criticize them at every single opportunity. Make them really feel how their efforts are worthless, highlight yourself explaining how you do it (so much better, and how much more effort you put into that activity).

3. Try something they would like to do, and say you don't want more of it, because it isn't interesting for you. Find something you can point at as a reason, for example: you are not competitive, they are, and they do it to compete with you. [Ignore your behaviour in 2.] They are doing things wrong (how they organize a club or something) . Say it, even if they followed the advice you gave to them.

4. Be offended if they don't watch your 40 hours game videos, but when they mention you a book they liked, find superficial information about it, form a negative opinion, and tell them how you's never read anything like that. Generally do your best to break down their motivation and enthusiasm about anything they might like.

5. Be demanding. Demand information (more than you actually need), feelings (yep, you really want them to feel certain ways, if they can't they are not true friends). Above all! demand complete access to their private life, otherwise you have to believe they are hiding things from you, and you cannot trust them.

6. If they keep some privacy, or don't want to constantly argue with you, and don't say everything they think, then tell them you can't trust them.

7. If they defend themselves, or argue about your attitudes towards them always say: - you didn't say anything wring to them - you don't remember saying those things. Always come out of the fight as "the victim". Don't apologize! Never admit you did something wrong.

8. Tell them how badly they treat you, and how much you tolerate from them.

9. If they say you are angry, say you aren't, they can't make you angry. (In other words, they can't reach you, you don't care enough about them to take it seriously.)

10. Never admit you did something wrong against them, but if they confront you with a mirror, saying you think you are too perfect, then say: you are aware you aren't perfect, and make mistakes, and sometimes you say rude things to others purposefully in anger. (never admit you're doing this to them too, it's important)

11. After some fights, if you made them apologize a few times, and made them feel awful friends, you can start the next phase.

12. Tell them you can't talk to them about anything, because you are afraid of their reaction. If they say the same about you, call them idiots, and cowards.

13. Repeat it enough times, you don't trust them. You don't want them to think you changed your opinion about them.

14. ALWAYS - very important - in every conflicts they have or ever had, take the opposite side. Don't forget to point out they caused it all to themselves. And don't offer any help to heal from these.

15. After doing so, complain a lot about it how nobody supports you, and all you want, a caring friend.

16. Ignore them a lot. If they bring it up, say you thought they didn't need as much attention as your other friends.

17. Complain about lack of friends again.

18. Call them your friends, but continue to behave the same way. If they ask why you are with them, if there is anything you like about them at all, then respond with confusing silence, and don't give any clear answers, avoid the question. If they say something positive about you, you just nod, saying it's same on your side too.

19. Make them feel guilty about everything: about treating you bad, about not doing everything in life they "could" (according to you), not wanting to know about your sexual life... everything you can think of. Criticize them for everything you hate in yourself. But deny if they say you share that trait.

20. If they try to discuss the friendship problems, never take the blame for anything. But demand change from them. (5. + 10. combined)

21. Throw them away if you are sue they will come after you, trying to make peace with you. But you never go after anyone to apologize, nobody is important enough for you.

+1 If they reach the point of human endurance, and leave you behind, then show their messages to your still existing supporters, and make them pity you, and boost your ego. You'll be fine in no time.

Note: Sorry for the bitter humor. I had bad luck, I knew more then one of this type. In those friendships, even if I saw the person's value, I constantly found myself defending, explaining myself. Nothing was ever really good enough for them - except when they had bad times, and I was there to listen and help. And sometimes these people - because they are not monsters - actually helped, and I felt gratitude. And that made me stay around them longer than I probably should, because I felt it would be a betrayal. But there is a point, when it just doesn't work anymore and falls apart. Things happened like this: I shared common hobby with them, art. And if I didn't manage to say what they wanted to hear, and obviously I didn't, then at one point they said they hate my works, I shouldn't show them anything I created. Let's say I liked the landscape painting more than their character drawing. Or liked their own drawing more than their hobby translations. Or with one of them it was difficult, because the person really have a lot to improve and I didn't want to be too harsh, so just pointed out a few things... for the person's request. And the reaction was complete rejection, this friend said it was purposefully like that.

We played it a few times, and then I gave up. I am not an art teacher, I tried to do something good, in a gentle way, but even that didn't work. Soon the same person started to complain about the lack of support and constructive criticism. Tried to push me into giving critique again, and when it didn't work, I got the: "I hate commenting on your works" and ignored my works. I tried to be friends with a certain community. I didn't fit it, some thought it's fun to mess with my emotions, being rude. I grieved my father too, everything just came at once, and I talked about it to my friend. For a few moments the person said it was unfair, but then I could say something my friend didn't like, and then the opinion changed to this: I caused it for myself, that group's reaction is understandable. That's how dynamics change with this type. And if someone is more emotional - like me - it's likely they/we react to that, confront the friend, and then there is fight over fight until one has enough brain to leave it all behind and close the friendship. No other options left.

If you feel like you're reading about one of your relationships, then let it be a warning sign. If you are the one doing such things to your friends, then it's a mirror for you. Please stop doing it. Thanks for reading!

[dukereviewsxtra]

Duke Reviews Xtra: The Sorcerer's Apprentice

Hello, I'm Andrew Leduc And Welcome To Another Duke Reviews Xtra Where We Continue Our Look At Disney...

Last Sunday On Duke Reviews, I Reviewed Disney's Fantasia Which Features Mickey As The Sorcerer's Apprentice Well, Today We're Going To Switch Mickey With The Voice Of Hiccup From How To Train Your Dragon In Jerry Bruckheimer's Version Of The Sorcerer's Apprentice...

This Film Stars Nicholas Cage As Balthazar Blake, Who Is A Sorcerer In Modern Day Manhattan That Fights Against The Forces Of Evil In Particular, His Arch Nemesis And Former Partner, Maxim Horvath (Played By Doc Ock) While Searching For The Prime Merlinean, The Person Who Will Inherit Merlin's Powers...

This Turns Out To Be Dave Stutler (Played By Jay Baruchel) A Physics Student Who Balthazar Takes As His Apprentice, Giving Dave A Crash Course In The Art And Science Of Magic And Sorcery So They Can Stop Horvath And Morgana Le Fay From Raising The Souls Of Her Evil Dead Servants So They Can Take Over The World...

Will Dave And Balthazar Stop Them?

Let's Find Out As We Watch The Sorcerer's Apprentice...

The Movie Starts With An Intro By Ian McShane...

Balthazar Spends The Ages Trying To Find The Prime Merlinean With No Child Being Successful Until The Year 2000...

When A 10 Year Old Named Dave Stutler (Played By Ben Stiller's Son From Night At The Museum) Encounters Balthazar In His Antique Store, After Straying Away From His Class Field Trip. Giving Dave The Dragon Figurine, It Comes To Life And Forms A Ring On Dave's Finger, Revealing Dave To Be The Prime Merlinean...

But When Balthazar Goes To Get A Book Of Spells For Dave, Dave Accidentally Knocks Over The Grimhold, Releasing Horvath From His Prison...

(Start At 2:34)

Found By His Classmates And Teacher, Dave Is Ridiculed By His Classmates When He Tells Them What He Saw Only For The Shop To Be Completely Empty, But Either Way Dave Keeps The Ring...

Fast Forwarding 20 Years Later, Dave Is Now A Physics Student At NYU Where He Meets His Childhood Crush, Becky Barnes (Played By Teresa Palmer)...

No, Not Bucky Barnes, Becky Barnes Though The Possibility Of Relation Can Be Questioned...

With His Feelings For Her Quickly Coming Back, He Repairs The Transmitting Mast Of The Radio Station She Works At After It Is Struck By Lightning. Released From The Urn After 10 Years, Horvath And Balthazar Escape To Continue Their Missions With Horvath Being The First To Get To Dave..

(Start At 0:38)

Landing On Top Of The Chrysler Building, Dave Refuses To Help Balthazar As He's Been Under Psychiatric Care Since They First Met But Saying That Once They Get The Grimhold, He'll Leave, Dave Decides To Help By Taking Balthazar To Chinatown Where It Has Been Located While Giving Dave Sorcery 101...

But When They Get There They Discover That Horvath Has The Grimhold And He Has Unleashed One Of The Evil Sorcerers That Was Inside Of It With This One Being A Chinese Warlock Named Sun-Lok, Who Fights Balthazar Until It Ends Up On The Streets Of Chinatown...

(End At 2:47)

Changing His Mind After Defeating Sun-Lok, Dave Becomes Balthazar's Apprentice, Giving Him A Book That Holds The History Of Sorcery As Dave Agrees To Take On The Responsibility Of Being His Apprentice...

Meanwhile, Horvath Goes To Visit A Current Evil Sorcerer Named Drake Stone, Who Is A Criss Angel Type Magician (Played By Doctor Doom From Fan4stic) To Ask For His Help Against Balthazar And Dave...

Taking A Break On A Bench, Balthazar And Dave On A Bench Across From Becky's Radio Station. Figuring Out That Dave Likes Her, Balthazar Is Somewhat Negative On The Relationship Stating That Love Is Not Good For A Sorcerer...

But Dave Follows Her To A Subway Station Where A Mugger Robs Them At Gunpoint, Stealing Becky's Grandmother's Bracelet But Chasing After The Mugger, Dave Uses His Magic To Knock Him Out And Return Becky's Stuff, Impressing Her...

The Next Day, Horvath Plans To Use The Satellite Dishes In The Financial District When The Spell Is Cast By Morgana, While Balthazar Continues Training Dave Only To Be Interrupted By Becky Who Comes Over For Dave To Tutor Her In Physics. Despite Trying To Put A Dampener On Their Relationship, Balthazar Leaves..

Showing Off His Tesla Coils, Dave Uses Them To Make Musical Sounds From Stevie Wonder's Superstition...

To OneRepublic...

So He Can Impress Becky...

It's Not Quite Can You Feel The Love Tonight But...It Works...

But As Becky And Dave Start Somewhat Of A Relationship, Dave Gets Encountered In The Bathroom By Stone And Horvath, Who Ask Dave Where The Grimhold Is After Telling Him The Truth That Veronica Is Inside Of The Grimhold...

Saved By Balthazar, Who Traps Horvath Inside Of A Mirror Temporarily And Knocks Out Stone, Dave Tells Him That He's Tired Of The Lies And Wants To Know The Truth Which Leads Balthazar To Tell Dave The Entire Backstory Again So That Dave Will Know Everything..

Getting Ready For His Date, Dave Attempts To Clean Up The Lab But Frustrated At The Mess, Dave Brings A Broom To Life Which Leads To A Recreation Of The Sorcerer's Apprentice Scene From Fantasia...

(Start At 0:25)

And Yes, I Know That Some People Complained That "They F-ed This Up This Is In No Way As Good As Fantasia!" And While That's True I Still Like This Scene For What It Is, The Actual Sorcerer's Apprentice Scene With Hiccup From How To Train Your Dragon...

Chastising Dave For Using Magic As A Shortcut, Dave And Balthazar Get Into A Big Fight Which Leads Dave To Storm Out In Anger...

Seeing Becky With Her Friends, Dave Leaves In Defeat Feeling Like He Doesn't Belong But Following Him To The Rooftop Where Balthazar Had Taken Him, Dave Is About To Throw Away The Ring, But She Stops Him, Saying That Nothing Is Ruined And That She Really Cares About Him...

Disguised As Dave, Drake Traps Balthazar So Horvath Can Search The Lab To Find The Grimhold As Horvath Reveals That The Reason He Turned Evil Was Because He Was Jealous Of Veronica Choosing Balthazar Over Him...

But Freeing Himself Balthazar Fights Horvath And Almost Loses Until The Real Dave Arrives To Save Him But Unfortunately Drake And Horvath Manage To Find The Grimhold And Leave With It...

Following Them In Balthazar's Car In A Chase That Ends Up In The Mirror Dimension From Doctor Strange, Horvath And Drake Still Get Away By Turning A Person Into A Veronica Look Alike...

Knowing That Balthazar Let Horvath Go For That Reason, Balthazar Finally Comes Clean That Veronica Was His One True Love Which Leads Dave To Decide That They Are Going To Get Veronica Out Of The Grimhold And Destroy Morgana Forever...

Back At Drake's Apartment, Drake Wonders How They're Going To Open The Last 2 Shells Of The Grimhold Only For Horvath To Use A Parasite Spell To Steal Drake's Powers And Life Force...

So He Can Open The Next Shell Which Releases Abigail Williams, A Witch From The Salem Witch Trials Who Kidnaps Becky At The Radio Station But Unfortunately After That, Horvath Uses The Parasite Spell On Her So He Can Eventually Free Morgana...

I Guess It Just Comes Down To...

Arriving At Drake's Apartment For The Grimhold, Balthazar Gets Caught In A Persian Rug Quick Sand Trap While Dave Gets The Grimhold Only For Horvath To Enter With Becky With His Cane On Her Throat Stating To Give Him The Ring And The Grimhold Or Becky Dies...

Realizing He Has No Other Option, Dave Does Just That Only For Horvath To Fire A Energy Bolt At Becky And Dave Which They Dodge And Flee As Balthazar Escapes The Quick Sand Trap...

Apologizing To Balthazar For Failing, He Accepts Saying That He Would Have Done The Same Thing Before Flying Away On A Giant Metal Eagle To Becky's Shock...

Dave Tries Dropping Off Becky But She Won't Have It As She's Involved Now So They Come Up With A Plan To Use Dave's Tesla Coils Strapped To Balthazar's Car To Defeat Morgana As Horvath Unleashes Morgana From The Grimhold In Battery Park...

Finding Them, Balthazar Fights Horvath Off As He Raises The Bull Market Bull Statue To Life So It Can Chase Balthazar. Believing Himself To Be Victorious, Dave Arrives To Halt Horvath's Celebration By Using Tesla Coils To Destroy His Cane, Defeating Him And The Bull..

But As That Happens, Becky Disrupts The Spell By Moving One Of The Satellites Which Leaves Balthazar To Suck Morgana's Soul Into His Body, Freeing Veronica...

With Balthazar Not Breathing, Dave Uses His Magic To Resuscitate Him So He'll Live Happily Ever After With Veronica As Becky Arrives For Her And Dave To Live Happily Ever After By Taking The Giant Eagle To Paris...

We Get An End Credits Scene Which Reveals That Horvath Will Return In A Sequel That Will Never Happen Thanks To Everyone, Who Didn't Like This Film...

And That's The Sorcerer's Apprentice And How Could Anyone Not Like This Movie?

The Story Is Great, The Action Scenes Are Amazing, The Cast Was Good, I Just Honestly Enjoyed It As Much As I Enjoyed The National Treasurer Movies Who's Director Jon Turtletaub Directed This..

You Know Some People Consider This As One Of The Disney Reboots But I Seriously Don't And The People That Do Are Idiots Only Question I Have Is Why Did This Movie Not Do Great?, Is It Because There Wasn't A Nicholas Cage Freak Out In It?

Newsflash! We Do Not Need A Nicholas Cage Freak Out In Every Movie He's In!

The First National Treasurer Movie Didn't Have A Nicholas Cage Freak Out And Look How Well That Did At The Box Office Where The Second One Did And Look How Bad That One Ended Up, I Still Like The Second National Treasurer Movie And I'll See The Thrid One When And If It Comes Out But Still...

Either Way I Say Don't Listen To The Haters And See This Movie...

Till Next Time, This Is Duke, Signing Off

[raoulstardust]

DON'T PANIC!

Dedicated to Nikki Bella. Happy birthday. DON'T PANIC! This is an iconic. phrase appearing on the cover of one of the most iconic books, in science fiction and humor, of all time. This is also what I said to myself when my phone suddenly ran out of power and I was forced to write this blog from the start. They say life "Life is like a roller coaster, with it's ups and downs." Or that "Life is like a box of chocolates, you never know what you are going to get." Although they may cover some aspects of life accurately, I think they are pretty inaccurate. More like they feel a bit too stable compared to life. Cause, in life stuff just happens. And no one can do anything about it. And moreover, everyone is affected in so many different ways, I don't think there are enough flavors of chocolates to compare. The chocolate industry is trying really hard though.

I think life is more like a journey through the Galaxy with a two headed president and a depressed and nihlistic robot, in a ship with an improbability drive which is controlled by a malfunctioning computer. You don't know where you ever are because of the infinite number of reference points. Think about it, there is always someone in a better position than you in life and someone in a better position. All we know that there is a start. We don't even know if there is an end. Which makes me think if we even know if there is a start. And you never know when the improbability drive kicks in. Some people are unfortunate enough to start their journeys on a collision course with the Sun. They say you are more than the surroundings in which you were born. But, what about the children born in warzones? But for us normal people, whenever this improbability drive kicks in, we wish for a book with a panic button, to help us make some sort of sense of this randomness.

Like I mentioned earlier, when I was writing this blog, my phone just switched off all of a sudden. It somehow went from 20 to 0 in an instant, and I was frustrated as hell. I just wanted to punch my phone. Cause somedays it lasts till 0 , on others it switches off at 60. But the reason I started panicking was because the time I spent writing it gave me nothing. I started from nowhere, and the improbability drive took me to a nowhere somewhere else. And then I started having this unbearable anxiety about having wasted the limited time I had , on nothing. I began thinking of all the other things I could have been doing. Sure, starting it was important. Maybe I got more time to write a better one. But one of the major reasons we all panic is that even when we do everything right and come so close to what we wanted, we randomly wind up nowhere without a clue what happened. And even when something good happens to is unexpectedly, all we can think about is when it will eventually go wrong. And some would argue that it is this negative thinking which makes it go wrong, and though it's often true, I still think that what happens just happens. Out human minds often fail to grasp the concept of randomness. Even well defined patterns have randomly sprung into existence. Which is why I think our perception of existence is a joke. We often think of a beginning and an end, but we often fail to comprehend that when everything exists, there will always be something more or nothing at all. I have spent a part of my life thinking about this, wondering what the reason to live was. If it all is just random , why should I suffer all the trials of life when it all means nothing and everything at the same time. I've always thought how funny it is when people complain about their life, for if they finally got what they wanted they wouldn't be here to enjoy it. After a long period of depression and an existential crisis caused due to my personal life going from a 90% straight to 0%, just randomly, I panicked. I didn't know what to do. I put my whole life in perspective and declared it not requiring my participation anymore. But then my role model and hero, a legendary professional wrestler and iconic woman, Nikki Bella said something which got me back up on my feet.

She said, that we should have a purpose which drives us. Her purpose was to change the world for the better. That gave me direction. I too thought about my purpose and I thought how I have always wanted to make a positive impact on the world too. I became my purpose. And that's when I realized that my purpose was having me for itself. I thought that I would change the world by inventing something. I thought I would be the next Elon Musk. I became disillusioned into thinking that Science was the only way. And so I took science in school. And although I absolutely love studying science,as Stephen Hawking was my first science teacher, the school had a different idea about science. I soon became disinterested, until one day I realized I knew nothing for my tests. So I panicked pretty hard. And I failed my Maths exam. Because I procrastinated whenever I had no idea of what to do. I got jealous of everyone who was more successful than me at my age. I didn't want the world wanted to be changed for the better. I WANTED TO CHANGE IT. AND I WANTED EVERYONE TO KNOW I DID IT.

Knowing that my time was limited, I started panicking every time something didn't go my way. Time, it is the definition of 'zero empathy'. It is the only part of nature which has worked against the survival of life. So, I decided that I would spend my entire life for my purpose. A family? That's for losers. Love? It's not essential. Except for some romedy. Rest? Nas said "Sleep is the cousin of death." And I wanted everything to be perfect. I didn't want a second of my time to be wasted. Ironically, whenever something didn't go my way, I panicked and procrastinated making sure that nothing would happen. And eventually I went on this quest to change myself so that I could change the world. The only problem, I expected too much and when the results didn't happen, I did the usual. Panicked, procrastinated and gave up. Being overweight, I have always wanted to lose weight. Trouble is that I would expect to transform from Chris Pratt in Parks and Recreation to Chris Pratt in The Guardians of the Galaxy. Unfortunately , biology doesn't work that way. And nothing resolves the sadness of not hitting your goals than a nice ice cream, right? Well one of the main reasons for me wanting to lose weight was that I wanted some girl to get attracted to me. Yeah, I know love is useless, but the raging hormones in my teenage body strongly disagree. Also,whenever I see people like Greta Thunberg becoming more successful at my age, I seethed with jealousy. Whenever I saw a friend accomplish something I felt like I wanted to top that person the very next day. So I piled everything in my schedule. I wanted to be better at everything than everyone else. And of course as I've shown throughout, even when you have everything planned out, randomness happens at random times. And when your life is so tightly packed, you can't afford that randomness. So whenever, things never happened my way, I panicked and procrastinated like usual and the mammoth plans held up by a structure of order collapsed on me, crushing me with more anxiety and panic.

So my grades went down. My weight went up. I was not learning anything new. Not developing myself. I stagnated. And I started complaining, but whenever I did so , I started comparing myself to people who had it much worse than me and that just made me feel guilty. So the only thing I could think of to overcome this guilt was self pity, so I started looking at my situations for being worse than they actually were. So I just stagnated more and more in a pool of self pity, guilt, hopelessness, anxiety and lethargy.

So I retreated back into my head full of nihilism and depression and anxiety. So I started failing. But then I remembered that I had filtered a lot of what Nikki Bella was saying to me. She said that fearing failure only makes it happen. She also said that every journey into the unknown was magical. It gave you new opportunities to explore yourself and push yourself beyond your limits. So I started enjoying this journey into the unknown. And since life is so random, everything is the unknown. I learnt new things, because I enjoyed them and I wanted to explore them, not because I wanted to compete. I decided I wanted to explore this randomness, see the beauty in it. Nikki Bella also said that true success in life was happiness. And this is one of the very few things about life which made sense to me. Sure a purpose gave our life meaning and excitement and something to be happy about , but it's not everything. I realized I am made up of a lot more than my purpose. So I started doing everything I was doing earlier to make me happy, not to fulfill a purpose. I wanted them to make me think. To make me feel satisfied. To challenge myself. To explore. And I knew that happiness was not feeling accomplished at the time of your death, cause they meant nothing then. Happiness is to be at peace with yourself in the present. To be able to smile in the present. And like Nikki, I became Fearless. I stopped fearing failure. I stopped fearing regrets, cause even though regrets are the worst thing because of the nature of time, fearing them made them happen. And the worst enemy of happiness is the unrealistic expectations that go along with the idea. You can never be happy throughout your life. Happiness is the moments of peace and satisfaction which come rarely in this random world often driving us to nowhere, but it's the rarity and challenge of feeling happy that make it what it is. You wouldn't know peace without knowing the conflict and you wouldn't know the satisfaction without knowing disappointment. And so, I started to accept myself for what I am. I still panic and procrastinate , but that's just a small part of me. There's also a part after me that gets up from failure, a part that works towards making my ideal reality manifest itself. So, now I am doing things I want to do. I am exploring randomness even when I'm sitting in one place. I am doing things which feel honest to myself. What makes me HAPPY.

So , PANIC! BUT DON'T PANIC!Sure , time is cruel, existence is meaningless and random and we have no idea why we were born. But this unknown is beautiful. Life is beautiful, although more than often it looks ugly. It helps us appreciate the beauty. Don't panic even if you panic. We all panic, but it is not what defines us. Try and explore the unknown. Do what makes you happy. Moreover, do what you want to do. Do what is true to you. Be yourself, cause you don't know why you started where you started, but there are infinite places to go and you should reach the place which gives you peace as yourself. Stress and anxiety often wear us down , and hopelessness may always overcome us. But getting through these challenges make life worth living. The only way you can achieve true happiness is if you achieve YOUR DEFINITION OF HAPPINESS. And you can only be at peace with yourself is if you accept yourself for the beautifully flawed homo sapien you are. The feeling of happiness and peace with yourself and the feeling to be able to share this happiness with someone else, all make life worth living.

Thank you Nikki Bella.

Thank you Mom. Love you.

[theangrypokemaniac]

@its-whitetomorrow

I appreciate that you take the time out of your day to read my witterings, and respond to them in detail, but I'm somewhat intellectually limited and it takes a while to write an answer.

The final one is a bit of a problem. The original post is long, your bit is long, and my addition is probably twice both put together.

Did you know Tumblr has a limit: no more than two hundred and fifty text blocks per post? I discovered this from experience, unsurprisingly.

I think the only solution is to split it across several posts.

I wasn't going to say anything, but I suppose I should.

I started this blog last May, to relieve the boredom of my main embarrassment, whose only likes (all three of them) were from porn bots.

It wasn't even meant to be about Pokémon. I'd left the fandom years previously. It was odds and ends, but I happened to find a few silly screen shots so wrote a couple of joke remarks, not expecting a ripple of interest.

Within a couple of hours I got more notes than t'other's managed even to this day. I had the idea this was where I was more at home, so I started taking it seriously.

My pseudonym was just daft thing I'd made up previously, to reflect that, whilst still in love with old days, I'm not exactly pleased with how it's gone.

I thought it might stand out as memorable, plus I like acronyms, so it affords me the opportunity to call myself 'T.A.P.'

In the early days the focus was on the 'maniac' aspect. Anger as a description didn't fit at all. The farther back you go, the more stupid and clownish it gets. It's not been like this all the way through!

Seriously, it used to be an entertainment blog, designed to make people laugh. It's all ages: no swearing, no porn, nothing to put anyone off.

(This post under discussion contains the only profanity I've ever deployed. I thought saving it up might add some oomph.)

I mean it, it's was all light-hearted ridicule. Every so often, there would be a slightly cutting remark, but mild compared to now.

Then, last September, someone I spoke to regularly, who assured me we were friends, suddenly cut off all contact.

At first I wasn't aware of it, but by October it became too glaring a silence to ignore.

I thought rifts started because of massive disagreements, but as far as I remembered our last exchange ended normally.

I found out by accident that the reason for it was because I am repugnant and morally inferior and so swollen with my own ego that the existence of others doesn't register. Instead they are but soulless droids built to worship the great T.A.P. mollusc.

Well that was news to me. I had no idea I came across like that. As far as I knew, I was on my best behaviour when we interacted.

I was polite. I tried to be ingratiate myself. I kept talk to the fandom. I didn't pry. I attempted humour when the opportunity arose.

I thought I'd done all I could to be liked, but apparently I hadn't. It was a revolting experience for them, for all of saying they loved me and I was 'honey'.

It really, really, really got to me, and the feeling hasn't abated, if anything it's worse.

As I said, I don't know what I did wrong, and because I don't, I can't mend my ways. If I am this repellant waste of flesh I'd like to change, but if I'm not told my offence, what am I meant to do?

If what I thought was the best I could be wasn't good enough, and instead was so sickening I don't deserve their presence, then I have no idea how to interact with people.

Maybe every time I respond to someone, thinking I'm at worst, civil, is really grotesque conceit, because my arrogance is so extreme I'm not even aware it's there. In my head it sounds normal.

It'd be too easy to scoff that they were the one with the problem, but, given all the arguments that happen in life, it can't always be someone else's fault. It's got to be you at least once.

They obviously think they were justified, so who's to say they weren't?

You may say not to let it worry me, that I should just get over it, and you'd be totally right. Being bothered makes me feel pathetic and petty on top of the rest, but this is me you're talking to, not a sane person. Self-hatred is more instinctive to me than breathing.

I always dwell on the negative. If one hundred people were assembled, ninety-nine of whom declared me the most wonderful being ever to live, and one remarked I wasn't all that special, it's him I'd remember. 

It's called ghosting because that's what happens. There comes a moment when you accept that, no, it's over, rejected again, and it's like realising I'd died, and had been gone for a while.

Except I hadn't noticed the process, so I was always dead in a way, and they spoke to the silvery silhouette left behind, until that too dispersed into untraceable nothingness. Again,  the silence is my fault for dying, not theirs.

I feel there's no point in messaging anyone, because I'll only disgust them too. Some blogs encourage contact, and when I see it I always think:

Yeah, but they don't mean YOU.

If it's another person I already spoke to, I can't shut up. I bombard them with text in the hope they know I don't think they're a menial droid. Every one I immediately regret, and wish I could take back, because that will irritate them until I'm just a sad, nagging past.

The Ghost-Maker used to reblog 99% of my work. This dropped to nothing overnight, so not only am I worthless, but so is everything I do.

Posts G.M. didn't like got 0-5 notes. Ones they did had 20+. Many a time, it took their reblog for anyone else to notice.

It was like others used that blog as a filter to pull the fool's gold from the murk of this one. Once their favour evaporated, so did a lot of the goodwill from elsewhere, so it's was as if Tumblr agreed I was scum.

Saying that above just shows they were right, because it takes one smug bastard to believe their existence registers with anyone else.

Please don't think I'm demanding likes, that my stuff deserves them, although as I'm arrogant I am. It's just that 99% to 0% is a bit of a fall.

Up til then, I held back much of what I thought about the current state of the anime, as they liked it, but now I have no reason to stop.

If I'm to be accused of all these vices I might as well have them. I'm dead, so who cares what I say? No one listens to a ghost.

It's not that I'm unconcerned if I upset anyone, it's just the truth that I don't matter enough for what I write to be valued enough to offend.

As a ghost, I think of this blog as invisible. It's there, but not really, so how can anyone mind?

Incidentally, the first week I was here I got blocked by someone who hates all fans from the Nineties. I don't care about that, as they sound like a cretin, and I'd have to be defective to gain their approval.

I just want to say I find that moronic. I don't hate new fans at all. I wouldn't block someone because we disagreed.

Blocking denies people access to your blog, stating they don't deserve your ART. That's arrogant to me.

Blocker likes Ghost-Maker, but...

Ever since around October, I've progressively become angrier and angrier. Whenever I'm here or Pokémon enters my head, it just reminds that I'm pond slime, about the most crude, malformed half-life freak you can envision.

I don't like being here anymore. I keep intending to leave, the site and the fandom, and set fire to it all before I go, wipe away the slug trail to spare people's stomachs.

I kept quiet until now, but holding it in just made it more intense. If I may describe myself in ridiculously flattering terms, I feel like a shaken champagne bottle, but the cork is welded in, so the only option is for the glass to shatter.

If anyone's reading this, wondering where the fun went, well this is why I flipped. The red mist won't clear. I can't see beyond it.

I won't name Ghost-Maker, because I don't want to start anything, plus most will take their side. They may see this as they still rifle round these parts occasionally for posts that aren't mine.

Well done, Ghostie. You're the lucky one. We'll never meet and you haven't seen me. Pity the poor sods I've encountered. There must be vomit trails across the land provoked by my vile condition. I wasn't aware of this until you let me in on the secret.

There's an English television presenter called Caroline Flack. She killed herself yesterday and everyone loved her. I feel guilty that I'm alive and she's not.

[faiakishi]

Well Delilah was a child when all the horrors happened to her. I don't think she was upset that it happened to her, just that people allowed it to happen. and suddenly she is supposed to care about the same people who built the world she suffered in. Fat chance. If you have been never taught empathy, you will never learn to show it.

Okay, back the fuck up. I wasn’t really planning to go on My Delilah Rant tonight, but I guess this is going down.

Shit’s under the cut because I know this is going to be long.

“Well, these horrible things happened to Delilah as a child” You’re absolutely right. It is horrible. You want to know who else had a shitty childhood? Oh, about half the people in the game.

Let’s look at Daud, for instance. Daud canonically A) is a product of rape, which resulted in B) his mother literally murdered his father, (justifiably, but still) and raised him as a single parent in a foreign country where she was treated like dirt, likely didn’t even know the language, and had to be brutal just to get by, which ended when C) he was kidnapped as a child by a man who exploited him and likely abused him, and it’s implied that Daud ended up snapping and killing him before being unleashed onto the world. Yeah. Not really great formative years. Not a whole lot of teaching him empathy and personal responsibility, was there?

Or Billie Lurk. The child of two broke drunks who didn’t give a shit about her. Her mother physically abused her and her biological father isn’t even mentioned aside from one line from the Heart, so Billie quite possibly may not even know who he was. She was a hungry, homeless kid who at fifteen watched as her first love was brutally murdered by an aristocrat for-what? Annoying them with her presence? They literally killed her because they fucking felt like it and laughed about it. And when Billie retaliated-because she knew they wouldn’t face any repercussions for killing a street girl, people like her were disposable, those boys were supposed to be her betters-she was hunted down like a dog and spent a year on the run, completely alone, because she’d be brought to face ‘justice’ for doing to Radanis Abele what he did to Deirdre. She was taken in by a man who taught her she had to cut throats and be merciless in order to get ahead, and that lagging behind would mean a knife in the ribs for people like them. She learned she had to be terrible if she wanted to survive. Also not great for learning how to be empathetic, but she sure still managed it.

“Oh but those are the bad guys” Yep. That’s intentional. I purposely did not mention the ‘good guys’ to give this comparison a more even contrast. Billie and Daud both did terrible, awful things. What sets them apart from Delilah is that they don’t try and excuse it with ‘my childhood!’ Their brutal childhoods definitely played a part in their formation but ultimately, they accept that they are responsible for the choices they made and understand that their actions had a negative impact. And they care about that. They feel guilty. They both refer to themselves as evil people and see themselves as beyond redemption, but still try to make up for their sins not because they want to feel better about themselves but because they feel like they should. They still have a functioning fucking moral compass, despite the ‘bad childhood’ experience. They aren’t trying to say ‘my actions were okay because x’. (and likewise, nobody in the fandom really should either-their actions weren’t excusable, that’s the point) They still have a sense of empathy. That doesn’t make them good people or even redeemable, but it makes them understandable.

Now let’s look at Delilah. For starters-Delilah is a narcissist. She literally meets every criteria of Narcissistic Personality Disorder. (She’s also very obviously a sociopath and is probably host to multiple other mental disorders, but I’m just going to focus on the first one)Narcissists have, at best, a very warped sense of history, and are at worst delusional.

There’s absolutely 0 proof that Delilah is Euhorn Kaldwin’s daughter, for one. In fact, there’s evidence against it. She didn’t come forward to take the throne during the first game, the ideal time to come out as Euhorn’s long-lost second daughter-she doesn’t even say she’s Euhorn’s daughter until DH2! Her story is inconsistent. And she gets her father’s hair color wrong, which is weird; it’s kind of flimsy evidence but I’m pointing it out anyway.

But let’s assume that she is a Kaldwin, to make things simpler. That Euhorn Kaldwin knew she was his daughter, treated her like so and promised her shit, and that it all ended when she got in trouble for breaking a decoration and that was the sole reason her mother was fired and Euhorn Kaldwin decided to conveniently ignore the fact that his daughter and mistress were living on the streets. (yeah, there’s more to that story) At what point was that Jessamine’s fault? Jessamine was a literal fucking child. She didn’t lie with the intent of making Delilah homeless and getting her mother killed. She shouldn’t have lied, yeah, but she was a kid and didn’t understand. Delilah’s hatred of Jessamine is so strong that she plans to remove her daughter’s soul-her daughter, someone who wasn’t even born at the time and had nothing to do with it-and inhabit her body, and would have likely arranged to have Jessamine and Corvo murdered if Burrows hadn’t done so. She defaces her memorial and still rants about her even in the last mission of DH2-you know, after Jessamine is at peace. She’s been dead for fifteen years and has literally faded from existence, and Delilah still can’t get over her anger at her. For telling a lie. About forty years ago.

(also, I just want to point out, NPD on the level that Delilah displays it does not freaking happen overnight. Delilah was likely a child narcissist. So the whole “Daddy I pwoooomise I’ll be a good girl, wHaT dId I DooOOoO’ act-yeah, no, that’s complete bullshit, it did not happen like that. If it happened at all, she was using it as a manipulation tactic. I can tell you what I suspect happened but I know if I do someone will scream ‘you’re just making shit up’ and use it to discount my entire argument, so I’m just going to leave that bit out)

Alright, so we got that established. Delilah went through some shit. She’s angry about it. And that’s 100% understandable! Anyone would be mad!

The problem is what she did with that anger.

Delilah focused 100% on enacting pain to ‘make up’ for what happened to her as a kid. This included people like Jessamine, who her retribution against doesn’t, you know, really match the crime. But it also included people like Emily and Corvo, who had nothing to do with that. Included people like Billie and Daud, who were already fucked over by those same circumstances that fucked her over. Included the lower class who were actively being fucked over by those circumstances. They didn’t ‘build the world that made her suffer’. The world is making them suffer too!

I could understand if Delilah’s plan was ‘fire and brimstone to this because it caused me so much grief’, and then worked to build a better society where people like her didn’t get fucked over. I could understand if that was Delilah’s motivation to take the throne.

But it wasn’t. Delilah wanted the throne because it was hers. She’s the rightful Empress, she’s perfect and wonderful, she’s a literal god, don’t you see?! Why aren’t you worshipping her?!!

She did not give a single shit that this system existed. She did not care about all the people it crushed under its boot. She was angry because she was better than those people, and how dare they act like she isn’t!

“Buh-but she was never taught empathy!” We’ve already established that Delilah has no excuse not to have a sense of morality. People who survived much worse conditions managed to form one. And even if no one ever showed her kindness, it would only take a scrap of self-awareness to realize that she was making others suffer just as others made her. She just didn’t give a shit.

Now, let’s move onto Delilah as a ruler. She lets her coven run wild. They murder indiscriminately-rich folk, guards, peasants, doesn’t matter. They torment and kill because they enjoy it. She encourages Luca Abele to treat Serkonos as his personal piggyback and playground. She thinks it’s funny how he fucks people over. She never sees the irony of that. She’s incapable of seeing it because those people are just her subjects. Not even in the monarchic sense, she literally sees them as just objects to serve her.

The only person, by the way, that she doesn’t treat like a disposable commodity is Breanna Ashworth. She’s the only one Delilah seems to have any genuine respect and love for. (she still gets over her death quite quickly, which plays into her sociopathy, but that’s another argument) Even Luca Abele, she sees more as a pet than a lover and partner. She shows her coven some moderate respect, because they worship her indiscriminately, but even them she doesn’t seem to care about too terribly much. Her allies are nothing to her. She turns Ramsey to stone because-why? They let him out of the saferoom and his first action wasn’t to prostrate himself and thank her for gracing him with her attention? She does this to literally anyone who annoys her.

So all those people screaming “well Emily wasn’t a perfect Empress either” well, you don’t have to worry about the Empress daydreaming during court because Delilah had Parliament torched! Court isn’t held! Delilah kills anyone who ever even suggests she do her job, because Delilah has no actual interest in ruling. She just wants to take from Jessamine and be worshipped as the god she knows she is.

When Delilah got crushed under the boot of the Empire, she was not mad that it happened. She was mad because she wasn’t the one doing the crushing.

This all, by the way, isn’t me saying that Delilah is bad as a character. On the contrary, I think Delilah is a beautifully written character! It’s just that not every character is meant to be redeemable. That’s not a requirement of being a well-written villain. And that, ultimately, is my problem with Delilah’s depiction in DH2 and a lot of the fandom’s response to her. Because she isn’t redeemable. Trying to throw a sympathetic backstory at her in order to justify her actions just comes off as cheap, because it does not explain why she does what she did. It basically says she just did it all out of anger and hate, which is not really a sympathetic standpoint.

She’s an awful person who took joy in hurting others, not out of her own pain but because she enjoyed having the ability to cause it. She has no excuse for any of it. She doesn’t care to excuse it. In her mind, this is how things should be. She’s the god. Everyone else are just objects to orbit her. It’s a fantasy incompatible with reality. And in trying to make it a reality, she becomes the oppressor she always railed against. She never sees the irony of that.

That is why Delilah is a Bad Person.

[oh-my-otome]

Hello and I wish you to have a good day. I don't know if this question had been asked before, but when I read your post about the lords and their dere leanings...I couldn't help but to ponder a bit more. Can you give me your opinion on how good the overall psychological health of the lords and main npcs are, in a scale from 1 to 100 (1 being downright nuts and 100 being perfect)? Also maybe some reasoning behind your opinion if it isn't too much of a hassle. Thanks before~

Hello, my lovely! Thank you for your patience!

Purely for fun: 

0=unstable, 50=borderline, 100=normal

Mother (100):

She’s grounded, with her head on her shoulders, and her only negative characteristics seem to be the immediate acceptance of her daughter marrying the first man dragged over the threshold (gross Magistrate notwithstanding), and working so hard that she throws out her back. 

Yahiko (100):

Yahiko is spunky but humble, and also very brave. He doesn’t hesitate to defend his sister, and also the girl that he likes, even when his opponent is twice his size. He shows loyalty to Inuchiyo, who grew up along side him, but also openness to his sister’s suitors. Always willing to help out, Yahiko is developing steadily into a fine young man with his head on his shoulders.

Magistrate (20):

It’s bad enough that the Magistrate has his eyes on you, because of your beauty, but it turns out that you’re not the only one he’s interested. In Shigezane and Nobuyuki’s event story, it was revealed that the Magistrate is courting several other young beauties– who are willingly consenting! The Magistrate has other women whom he– ugh! –“spends time” with, and yet, you’re the only one that he levels his ire on, when you say that you don’t want to be with him. Since he can apparently have his pick (??), it makes no sense why he’s fixated on you.

Nobunaga (65):

Nobunaga’s got a lot on his shoulders, but he’s also part of his own problem. More than once, he’s gotten in his own way, with his rash actions. He also wallows in guilt so deep that it must be a struggle for him to decide if it’s worth coming up for air, or just sinking to the bottom. No amount of reverent sake sipping will bring his brothers back, and the cost of seeing his ambition bear becomes harder with each battle. Fortunately, he is surrounded by those who truly have his back.

Mitsuhide (85):

Mitsuhide is over-worked, and that’s exactly the type of masochism that gets him going. While anyone else would break under the pressure, Mitsuhide is in the zone when he feels he’s being depended on. He does have a stubborn side, on occasion, and has a tendency to let his co-dependent relationship with Nobunaga go to far by being so willing to accept almost anything.

Katsuie (85):

Sometimes a little hard-headed for his age, Katsuie is affable and warm, nurturing and kind. He provides the stability that many of the retainers need in their chaotic world, and is always willing to help out.

Yukimura (70):

What takes Yukimura’s score down is his bizarre relationship not with his mother, but with her memory. He purposefully distorts it to suit his needs, and everyone around him just lets him. The other thing is the glee he shows for giving his life for his lord which, while romanticized in the game, isn’t normal. His overconfidence hasn’t killed him yet, only because he has plot armor. 

Even with it, he shows disregard for the feelings of those who wish him to come home alive. What he says to his MC’s face about coming home safe is all well and good, but when he’s actually on the battlefield and eagerly throwing himself face first into a mass of swords, spears and guns, with a smile– if his MC could see him in that moment, his words would look like nothing more than platitudes.

Nobuyuki (15):

It’s all well and good to describe Nobuyuki as a yandere– because he definitely is one –but he’s even scarier than that. He lacks true empathy, but knows how to feign it well enough to get by, which only ups the creep factor. Not only can he can mimic the emotions that others display and mime them without detection, he doesn’t hesitate to ensnare another person and manipulate them to suit his needs. 

Without a hint of remorse, he also utilizes the help of others in facilitating the captivity of others. If he would do it to the woman he claims is “perfect” for him, imagine how he’d treat an enemy. 

Saizo (75):

Saizo refuses to let himself forget how he played a hand in the demise of his friend, even though he knows that not only were his hands tied, but that he was duped, to boot. In an odd way, his rehashing his guilt every time it rains serves to provide some measure of comfort for him, in his grief. 

Even when facing ridicule, Saizo is quick to step in to help those who need him, and his jealous streak rarely goes out of the bounds of what most would consider normal.

Hotaru (70):

If he would be allowed to actually learn things like a regular person, Hotaru’s score would be much higher. With his heart firmly in a good place, Hotaru’s mishaps stem from him being forcibly stunted socially, and his continued isolation, rather than from any fault of his own. 

Easily fixed with patience and kindness.

Kotaro (60):

Having the misfortune of being part of the Hojo clan, it is surprising that Kotaro is actually normal, when in a normal setting. Excluding situational triggers– such as being around Saizo, Ujiyasu, or when he has a migraine –Kotaro is basically a more world-wise Hotaru. 

When he’s around his triggers, you can forget it. He’s basically not even himself anymore, performing actions far removed from how he behaves when away from them. 

With the triggers, he lacks control, self-preservation, and empathy.Without the triggers, he’s calm, reserved, and respectful.

When he was crying out for his mother, in his event story, and apologizing for being alive, my first thought wasn’t that he desired to die because his mother didn’t like him for some reason, but that perhaps his mother was dead and he wanted to be by her side, but was still alive.

That’s my headcanon, anyway.

The way that Kotaro speaks of himself also reflects the Hojo way or thinking– that everything is beneath them. He refers to himself as a worm, and worms are literally beneath everything. It is when he meets his MC, in his event, that he walks straighter and taller, making the symbolic transition from the ground (worm) up (holding one’s head with pride)

Masamune (75):

Masamune is only holding it together, initially, because he’s propped up on both sides by Kojuro and Shigezane. He very strongly desires a relationship with his mother, but does little in being the forward-moving action to help get started on that venture, past brief chats avoiding the topic entirely, and merely nodding his assent.

Masamune is also passive-aggressive– sometimes even straight aggressive, with no sugar-coating –and is quick to pull a sword on someone for daring to give him a compliment.

Being around his MC gets him to calm down, and Masamune, having found someone his own age who truly cares for him, is able to display his feelings more naturally. He becomes calmer and gentler by comparison, and is able to open up more.

Yoshihime (30):

Yoshihime takes her grieving to the extreme, starting first with her child, whom she shuns out of ignorance, and then for her husband, believing the lies that her own brother told her.

Throughout the game, we see Yoshihime making very realistic strides.

Kojiro (100):

Caught between his brother and mother, Kojiro struggles to maintain two different types of loyalties, and does the best that he can. Generous and kind by nature, he desires stability.

Shigezane (80):

Shigezane clearly has his secrets, and even when it comes to his feelings of inadequacy, which he readily admits to, he appears to handle himself well. Shigezane is the type of person who knows exactly what he needs in order to be happy, but he remains respectful to others and doesn’t take what’s not his. 

He is more independent and proactive than Masamune, which is why his score is higher.

Kojuro (75):

He may have no house training, but Kojuro is very capable in other areas. Kojuro doesn’t work himself quite as hard as Mitsuhide, but he’s up there, diligently working away to buoy up his lord.

Kojuro admits that he occasionally has a problem nannying Masamune and shunning Shigezane, but he also knows where to draw the line, to let his lords figure things out on their own.

eta:

@saizoswifey How could I forget what you very helpfully reminded me: Kojuro’s undermining of Shigezane’s relationships!

He was unaware that he was doing it, however, and it is unclear if the women were potentially using Shigezane to get closer to Kojuro.

See this post.

Having the same type and moving in before someone else can is very similar to how Hideyoshi behaves with both his own MC and Toshiie’s, as in each route Hideyoshi makes the first move.

Thank you!

Hideyoshi (65):

Hideyoshi always has a ready smile and it quick to placate his lord, but under the surface, he can snap back quite easily to the scrappy young man that he used to be, left in the world to fend for himself. 

The difference is that now that he’s grown, he has a man’s strength to go along with that rage, and if one isn’t careful, they might find themselves on the receiving end of him having a flashback.

Adept at hiding the pain in his heart, Hideyoshi throws himself into performing acts of service to others, and appears confident even when he doesn’t feel like that on the inside.

Hanbei (95):

Coping with a terminal illness, Hanbei does all that he can to make himself of use to those that he cares about, even when the odds are against him. However, he is stubborn.

Toshiie (75):

Toshiie’s insistence that he tell his MC about her father “when the time is right” is nothing more than cowardice and selfishness, but he holds on to it as if keeping such a secret will somehow protect her.  What he doesn’t realize is that doing so will only make her trust him less, as the first thing out of anyone’s mouth would be “why did you wait so long!?”

Hopping around from father-figure to father-figure highlights his need to fill a void in his life, and is an area in which Toshiie misses a chance to strengthen his tie to the woman he loves.

Instead, he chooses to make stronger a bond that was never weak to begin with– by going to save Katsuie –rather than saving his MC, to whom he has already nearly broken his connection with, through his poor choices.

Keiji (80):

Keiji plays up the part of the wild, sloppy-kissing, lazy bones good-for-nothing, but it turns out that he has more stability and common sense than he’s given credit for. Throughout Toshiie’s route, Keiji is there to bolster the MC’s confidence in herself, even when she lacks the energy and will. 

Ieyasu (65):

Ieyasu��s demons may be in the closet, but the door isn’t closed– it’s half-open. At the back of his mind are all of the horrors that he faced in the past, and they are easily dragged to the forefront of his mind, should the situation present itself, where he becomes upset about something, or at someone, and then there he is again, losing control. He is reactionary, with a tendency to lapse into old behavior.

Once he meets his MC, Ieyasu improved dramatically, but when he’s presented with knowledge that she betrayed him, he launches into a knee-jerk reaction without even considering that he’s been lied to. Once he’s had a few minutes to think, only then does he realize that he’s not in the past anymore, and that he has the means to protect himself and others.

Toramatsu (90):

Toramatsu is moved very quickly to exasperation, and can be a little melodramatic and passive-aggressive, even manipulative, but he is otherwise normal, as these situations are far from frequent.

Tadakatsu (65):

Tadakatsu’s desires may not be the norm around the castle, but it’s not the desires themselves which are the issue. Tadakatsu will go out of his way to get what he wants, even knowing that his lord takes no pleasure in taking part in it, but is merely humoring him because it helps him remove himself from the situation faster. Finding Ieyasu’s complacency suits him just fine, Tadakatsu actively seeks out situations which will get him his desired results, anyway.

He has also said that it doesn’t matter who it is, so long as they give him what he wants, and to that end, Tadakatsu would likely continue to ignore other people’s boundaries, as even his speech has no filter.

Yasumasa (55):

Yasumasa’s hatred of women seems to come from different aspects of his psyche. From being socially awkward, to wanting to impress his lord, to wanting to dominate his lord’s decisions, to disregarding his lord’s will entirely, Yasumasa can’t seem to figure out what exactly it is that he wants.

He flits like a butterfly from flower to flower, from standpoint to standpoint, each soapbox he stands on changing slightly every time he opens his mouth.

In one breath, he’s saying women have no place in the clan, in the next, he’s asking the Lady of the clan for forgiveness. On one hand, he desperately wants to curry favor with Ieyasu, the next time he turns around, he’s forcing Ieyasu’s hand, and making him uncomfortable.

Mitsunari (65):

Mitsunari is undoubtedly teeming with an unholy amount of fanboyism toward his lord, but he’s also– put bluntly –an ass.

He’s quick to point out how stupid someone else is, and then the next thing you know, he can’t figure out something simple, because it has nothing to do with Hideyoshi, or it wasn’t in a book, or the information in the book is different, or it has to do with women.

He expects to be apologized to, but can barely move his tongue to offer an apology, himself.

Fiercely loyal, Mitsunari throws his hat in with those who have shown him consistency, devotion, and good-will. Once they have earned his trust, those close to Mitsunari can expect that he will give his all, in all ways, and find in him an ever-lasting friend.

Kenshin (45):

Suicidal, and mercurial, Kenshin needs a keeper, and Kanetsugu knows it. Kenshin will do anything so long as it is as far as he can get from the castle, and although it is usually played for laughs a careful read will reveal that the further away from the castle Kenshin gets, the happier he becomes– because he is trying to distance himself from his role.

Once he connects the dots that there is a spy in the castle, sent to kill him, Kenshin, who has long-since grown tired of being the blood-thirsty “God of War,” allows himself to fall into the trap, being so depressed that he sees no way out.

Yoshichi (100):

Cheerful and sweet, Yoshichi does everything that he can to be of help to his lord and his brother.

Kageie (75):

Kageie’s negative traits a few compared to his ability to do his job so well. And it is because he does his job so well that he is cocky, especially with newcomers. 

Because he tends to live in his own head, being satisfied with his reasons for doing things, but not always voicing them aloud so that others know why he behaves a certain way, his actions sometimes come across as bizarre, leaving others to wonder how he is able to do certain things. The end result is that it creates mystery, but also confusion for those who want to get close to him.

Kagetsugu (45):

I won’t spoil it, and you can say whatever you want, but the motivations for his actions make no damn sense.

Outside of that, Kagetsugu, like Inuchiyo, tends to realize his own feelings for those around him so late that he has let the opportunity to act on them sail by. Even platonically, he nearly burns every bridge he has.

Shingen (70):

Shingen is trying to hold his clan together, against the rising force of an unlikely opponent. He’s trying to hold it together, and when he can’t, he would rather seeing his empire razed than taken over. He’s also in deep denial about his illness, and very stubborn.

Kansuke (80):

Kansuke is under enormous pressure to keep his lord alive, both in his capacity as a retainer, and as a friend so close that he’s family.

He is a tsundere and a kuudere, and while his emotions tend to not show on his face, he can transition from one dere-type to the other at breakneck speed, when he’s crossed.