#i simp so fucking hard

[just-null]

YO, SUPER LATE SUPER LONG SUPER MESSY OCTOBER POST THAT I JUST SHOVED EVERYTHING INTO BC I DIDN'T WANT TO DO MULTIPLE. FUCK IT.

I forgot halfway that these were supposed to be costumes and not mini aus... SO REMEMBER IN MY PLACE, EVERYTHING IS HYPOTHETICAL. also. some have a bit of yandere elements to them bc its SO FITTING FOR NORITOSHI.

Happy late October, everyone. it's winter now. Let's get it, baby.

[Long rambles and doodles under the cut!]

Vampire!

I kept asking myself, "How sexy is too sexy.." and "How the fuck does a sexy vampire even look like without it being a shirtless guy w fangs or Edward Cullen....." I think I figured it out

Sure, sure, vampires are superhumans with sun allergies that can drink blood really hotly. They can also easily overpower you to feast and blah blah blah, but what if said vampire (Noritoshi) was too weak to do any of that? Not literally, but he craves your say. He wants not only your blood but your affection. He wants to get praised as he drinks you in. Are you comfortable? How much will you allow him to take? Do you want to get him back in return? Guidance with this makes him feel more at ease. It's still Noritoshi at the end of the day. He's going to find a way to be a little awkward about you because of his crush. He refuses to drink from anyone other than you, even if it causes his death. Therefore, he has to keep you healthy! For the rest of your lives..! Besides, he can't really go outside or else he'd.. y'know. So if you think about it, this is a very beneficial relationship for both of you!!

The only downside is that you're losing blood on the regular, and for some reason, more people are moving away... Probably nothing, right? Noritoshi is always there to keep you company and help you recover anyways.

Witch!

my attempts also bled into the witch design.... you got greedy with requesting two in one ask, but I'll spoil you this time bc I also wanted to see Noritoshi as a (sexy) vampire and witch. heh. AND I DIDNT REALIZE HED BE SO CUTE AS A WITCH..... WHAT THE FUCK?? rip momo, fight for your title of cute witch...

Noritoshi strikes me as one of those witches who'd rather be left to their own devices because they're running some important magic whatever in the background. though, he'll take some breaks and indulge you if you insist on having him around. Insist meaning you pass by and strike conversation, leaving him to neglect anything and everything to prioritize his time with you. He doesn't want to use magic on you unless it's beneficial for either you or both. Noritoshi likes a natural progression with you that he knows for a fact is true and not some product of some spell. Though it doesn't mean he wouldn't use charms and such to get you to interact with him more often to speed up the process!

Can't sleep? He has a remedy perfect for that! Bad luck? Oh no, take a charm. Nerves? A potion he perfected will help you ease your jitters. Annoying peers? With a snap of Noritoshi's fingers, they're gone! Just don't ask what happened. Enjoy yourself instead and come to him with any new issue. He's quick to resolve it.

Definitely has some sort of doll that looks suspiciously like you.. Noritoshi would probably talk to it and practice one liners that give you the strongest sense of nostalgia once he uses them. He's simultaneously giddy that the charm he put in the doll works but also a little annoyed that his hard work isn't surprising you, but leaving you with deja vu.

Idol!

i was crying the entire time bc what does an idol look like.... noritoshi is handsome enough to be an idol without actually being an idol... now i can confirm that idols are very well dressed though. thumbs up 100% but i had some thoughts...

[Idol]

Noritoshi would be the type to cherish his fans, but hold clear favoritism over you. he'd be those idols that look cold, but they talk, and they sound smug in a charming way. i don't know much about idols, but i know he'd be so fucking good.... he'd be the type of guy to sing to you amongst the hundreds in the crowd.... ahhh the interviews w these famous aus. they're just talking and acting like themselves. can you imagine Noritoshi getting asked the question if he has a lover or not? he can lie, im sure you're alright with that, but he doesn't want to!! he does have someone!!! someone he loves more than all his fans love for him combined!!! he just can't say it for the sake of your privacy and his career. so Noritoshi does what any charming guy who's good with their words does. he deflects the question. answering the question, but not really, that'd be something he's known for. fans online are split on why Noritoshi does this. some think he's trying to keep that side of his life private, others think he's trying to mess around, and others think he's hiding a secret lover!!! though the last one is usually seen as the outlandish one, sometimes it makes Noritoshi's heart drop bc they get some things right. "Having a lover is a complicated question hidden behind a simple disguise. If I had to answer, I'd say my lovers are my audience. they make sure i'm well cared for, some more than others." AND HIS FUCKING LITTLE SMIRK I CANT COUGHS UP BLOOD. IM A THEORIST TOO. SECRET LOVER. 🫵🫵🫵🫵🫵

ON THE FLIP SIDE....

[Not an Idol]

An amusing thought where Noritoshi goes out in his casual clothes, and he's mistaken for an idol. No one knows who he is, but he just looks like he'd be one. bro's just trying to buy groceries, and now he has a fan group asking him to take pictures with them.. He'd tell them that he's just a guy, not an idol, but the group would still want a picture with him. it'd be a waste to pass by someone who's so naturally gorgeous, so with a sigh of defeat, he relents. It's just a photo, right? No harm done. Noritoshi'd go home and feel overwhelmed/embarrassed by the whole ordeal. later, he gets a call from someone in the kyoto group or you to inform him how he's all over social media, known as that handsome guy in the supermarket. HED BE COMPLETELY UNREACHABLE TO MEDIA OUTLETS BC NORITOSHI IS THAT GUY WHO DOESNT HAVE SOCIAL MEDIA.... he'd have to make one to make sure no one pretends to be him online. "Hello, I don't use social media, but I've been informed I've been getting attention online. To prevent anyone from being fooled by an impersonator, this is my official and only account. thank you." P.R. STATEMENT WRITING ASS.. his single post gets flooded with likes, comments, and DMs. it almost blows up his phone..... he was just buying bread, dude...... people try to dig up and find him through the other Kyoto group's social media.

[bonus] my second in command requested to put him in a fem idol outfit bc he thought it was funny. after frothing at the mouth and coughing out blood, I complied.

Doctor!

THIS IS SUCH A STRAIGHT FORWARD ASK BUT IT HAS SO MANY IMPLICATIONS. MY BELOVED CULT MEMBER.. THOSE EMOJIS GIVE ME A DIFFERENT IMPRESSION BUT IM NOT SURE.

Noritoshi as a doctor...... apple sales would plummet. his little clinic's business would skyrocket. sick cases would peak in his area. getting your heart checked by his stethoscope would be so fucking embarrassing bc all he'd hear is THUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMP

LIKE IMAGINE IF THAT WAS YOUR DOCTOR? BRO.

COUGH COUGH HACK WHEEZE COUGH COUGH.

Noritoshi would probably own a small clinic that he wants to expand. That or he opened one after working for a hospital for a while. He's a great doctor who's most likely respected but a pain in the ass to work with. Among patients, he's gotten the hot doctor reputation. Most want to be treated by him, but he's so professional, any chance of trying to flirt goes down the drain. Yeah, he puts his hair up to avoid it in his face even though his eyes are closed classic lab safety procedures. He seems like the type to have a soothing but authoritative voice during examination, so he gets his message across. it's a bit difficult when dealing with patients for Noritoshi. If he sees them too often, he firstly scolds you for not taking care of yourself, then feels guilty for not giving you the proper care. Keep yourself safe and healthy, or else Noritoshi will clearly :( Putting him in a yandere setting would be dangerous. He'd have a lot of control over you, considering he can prescribe medication, shots, visits, and other things.... he'd have a ball.... nothing that would cause you any harm, of course. he's only looking out for you and doing what's best for you..!

Pirate!

my second in command wanted a pirate. pirates are so fucking cool and i know damn well if this guy were a pirate he'd have a bunch of battle scars under that fancy coat.

Noritoshi as a pirate would be more than a little odd, but also fitting. He looks like the type of guy who'd be well put together, yet he's willing to get his hands dirty. Like the guy who got into the pirate life because of some personal issue that couldn't be solved fast enough through conventional means. Even as a pirate, i imagine he holds everyone to high standards. They're still pirates though.. so his expected standards aren't even that high. He has more freedom here, so even he himself lets loose once or twice. Especially with you. He's even able to get away with more violent actions for you, the seas are unpredictable, after all. While taking some treasure, Noritoshi'd toss you a gem or golden coin, just so you can say you were the first to claim it. Just so he can see that happy glint in your eyes when getting your hands on treasure. God forbid anyone try to get their hands on your hard earned goods. They'd be met with a bullet to the foot or a sword at their neck. Everyone and their mother knows how you're his favorite, but Noritoshi downplays it. Its not a crime to help out someone from his crew is it? Not in the seven seas. He leans more into his cold ruthless killer side here. He has goals and people to help keep in line whether hes captain or not. Yet when around you, he's almost adorable in how he shows you a pearl so entrancing that it reminded him of you.

Corpse Bride!

my submission to my Noritoshi Halloween costume closet.. CORPSE BRIDE, THIS MOVIE FUCKS. esp w the yandere elements.

Noritoshi 100% made you recite the wedding vows to him before accepting the ring. If you fumbled up, he'd correct you with SO much attitude and expect you to start from the top until you got it perfectly.

Hypothetically, in the chalice scene towards the end..

Noritoshi is the type to never be fully relaxed unless he knows for sure you'll be eternally his. In this scenario, YOU proposed to HIM but have to die to continue being together. Not only that, but someone in the living world is also after your heart. Someone who bleeds. Someone who's the obvious choice. Someone who can give you the life that you deserve. Someone who will succeed in their pursuits if you. remain. alive. Noritoshi's life was cut short, yet he still managed to lose so much and be abandoned a considerable amount of times. When he meets you and finds out about the possibility of having to go through that again even in death, it finally clicks in his rotting mind. He realizes he's been doing something wrong to keep constantly failing. Noritoshi revises his methods to a more.. selfish course. Why should he care about anyone else's wants or how his actions hurt them? You were the only one who made him truly fulfilled, to make him feel alive. The only one who deserves anything and everything good that comes from this world. Destiny is never done toying with him when he realizes your marriage is invalid because of your pulse and his lack thereof no matter how hard he'd try, but the opportunity arises. of course, he's ecstatic to give you an afterlife worth much more than what a silly beating heart can achieve. "All people die eventually. If you miss your living family or friends, all it takes is patience, darling. I'll wait by your side in the meantime." He weighs the pros and cons of everything, but when it comes to swaying manipulating your thoughts he only highlights the ones that'll get you on his side. in this case, the pros of dying to be with him! Honestly, the answer was so obvious that Noritoshi didn't know why he was stressing about it before. It hurts him to see you in any type of pain, but he reassures both himself and you that it'll only be for a moment. Afterward, he'll have the rest of your afterlives to make it up to you!! What happened to Till Death Do Us Part? Noritoshi thinks it's insulting that something as shallow as that could be so widely accepted. If your love were true, it wouldn't stop just because the world decided to take them away. "Till death do us part? Darling, don't be silly. 'Not even death will do us part' feels much better, doesn't it?" 

[cybertron-smash-or-pass]

[esosage]

Doctor olivia octavius, from the "into the spider-verse" movie, is litterally just the gender bent version of dr. Robotnik from the first sonic movie, and you cannot change my mind.

I mean LOOK AT THEM!

LOOK AT THEM!

[avellanas-nutty-empire]

Imagine being mad at clavis bc he won't let you suck his dick.

He knows he will melt into a puddle the SECOND you start and that is precisely why he can NEVER let you suck his dick ;-; he would get too subby he doesn't want you to see his 'pathetic' side like that. But I'm just imagining knitting or sewing up some sort of clavis shaped plush to hug and spend all your attention on instead of him when ur mad at him like this.

Clavis: babe plz why u mad? Real clavis is right here stop hugging that stupid substitute

Mc: lemmi suck ur dick and I'll get rid of it

BC honestly he made you that clay figure so you wouldent be lonely when he's gone but when he's NOT gone you DONT need it bc the REAL him is RIGHT THERE. He would get SO JEALOUS. But damn the man just WONT let you suck his dick so you have resorted to drastic measures. And he doesn't know what to do about it

[reigen-small-naturals]

aight let's go

timeline of laz1's diamond and lykn's lego (with a celebrity cameo (it's daou, daou is a celebrity cameo))

jan 30: somebody asks mond how would he feel if lykn's william would come to his live. diamond says he would thank him, and talks about lego being cute.

after that they would occasionally comment under each other's tiktoks and also diamond likes a tiktok about their interactions

march 4th: lego posts a tiktok to a song by boss and diamond. the lyrics of the song are like 'you stole my heart where did you go'. diamond comments "where did you end up going", and lego answers "come and i'll tell you".

that same day diamond streams and lego comments on his live. here is a supercut of everybody in the chat telling him that lego is watching and mond not believing them but scrolling a lot to find The Legomments. the legomments in question are: asking mond about his hairstyle, apologizing for not being verified and laughing at the situation

diamond in turn apologizes for the situation on twt and lego laughs at it again

march 18th: lego posts a tiktok to hit me up and diamond comments

june 10th: fans talk to diamond and they start teasing him about lego. they ask him if they met already ("no not yet") and does he want to meet him ("where is he?")

june 14th: lego QRTs that video and laughs that if diamond wants to meet up he could've just say so

june 16th: there is no other way to phrase this: diamond is Shooting His Shot.

and now. ladies and gentlemen.

the stream

not even describing it, just watch the videos. it's so!

after lego left the stream, we have our celebrity cameo: khun Daou Pittaya himself jumps on diamond's stream to tease him and call him out for the flirting

june 21st:

june 30th: it's the day they meet on the bondbond festival. but first, lego tweets this and they chat a bit.

the first tweet says 'i didn't take any pictures, this is all i have, i love phis, i don't want to be just a nong' and it can be related to mond bcs diamond posted a tiktok with lego to the song 'brother zone' by bus7, and the lyrics of the song are, well, about phinonging lol

here are behind the scenes of that tiktok

they also filmed a trust me challenge

july 3: diamond's mom reposts a ship video of them. ANYWAY

july 26: diamond comments this:

and lego answers with a selfie and a song, here are the song's lyrics

september 11: goodnight to lego from diamond

september 12: cat to diamond from lego

also we have another celebrity cameo: joong archen liked a post about diamond's comment

this timeline is last updated on 2024/09/17, anyway there is that!

[fischotterkunst]

Hi so your art just came across my dash and I LOVE IT SO MUCH?????

LITERALLY JUST BRIGHTENED A BAD DAY TO SEE HAPPY MARGIE DRAWN SO BEAUTIFULLY OH MY GOSH ;u; Your art style is just so freaking gorgeous I want to eat it 😭

I saw you're asking for more suggestions from the meme to draw too and I gotta ask for Florian for 4B please it'd be so frickin funny X'D

Expressions meme (accepting for IDV characters!)

thank you so much for this kind message i'm so so happy to hear my art had a positive impact on you ;w; thank you also for the excuse to draw Florian! i've simped him since his debut i can't believe i haven't drawn him before...

[the-forgotten-narrator]

getting used to drawing him

[whos-hotter-jjba]

Hottest Stand Battle - Second Round Match 8

Stand abilities under the cut:

Soft & Wet: Soft & Wet generates star-embedded floating bubbles. The signature ability of Soft & Wet's bubbles is to temporarily steal and contain physical properties, objects and substances. If a bubble pops on contact with an object, it will take away a certain property from the object for a short amount of time. If it doesn't, it will store the property inside, allowing Soft & Wet to pop the bubble later and transfer that property to another object. 

Moody Blues: It possesses the ability to imitate the form of individuals and reenact past events with precision.

[monomori3]

@sans-guy @didderd @mothiepixie and most importantly @hearty-dose-of-ranch ARE YALL HAPPY I AM NOT NORMAL lakdjflakjdlfjkaldfj

[ink-blot-thoughts]

Wait holy shit if Childe had fallen into the abyss just a bit younger and was yeeted to the fatui at the same age...

Do you think he wouldve been adopted by Arlecchino's orphanage?? Now there is an AU I wanna see. Murder gremlin Childe who's only parental figures for years have been hot scary abyss woman and hot scary Harbinger woman.

No wait I'm so into this she makes him wear the scarf and scoffs about his ridiculous stomach window in Harbinger meetings and he instinctually does the "Daaaaaad" whine and the other Harbingers are trying desperately not to laugh cause they know Arlecchino is down to shank a bitch.

Just. Childe raised by Arlecchino. Chefs kiss.

[i-am-cesear]

Akane what the fuck.

Teru what the fuck.

[watatsumiis]

you know when you see pics of older people from when they were in their early adult-hood years and and turns out they were BANGIN’ hot. like they-definitely-had-a-line-of-lovers type of sexy. Pierro.

YOURE SO SO REAL FOR THIS LIKE GENUINELY. Like. Pierro is that brand of old man crunchy where like.. he aged like a fine wine most certainly, but its so easy to tell that he looked like a greek god in his youth - chiseled jawline, striking eyes, that easy confidence that comes from a life of having pretty privilege thrust upon you from pretty much the moment you came out--

Like.. i feel like he wouldve looked like the grunge aesthetic young adult they slap on the front of album covers where he looks sunken and tired but in a totally dashing way, with wind-tousled hair (honestly i never even thought of his original hair colour until now. i just imagine it white/grey because thats SO him. i could see it being brown, maybe blond?) and eye bags that look like they were dabbed on delicately with eyeshadow and a brush.

but even with all of that i do also just see him looking like he was just straight up carved from marble with his broad shoulders and the confident way he stands. Like he was drop dead gorgeous, the folks of khaenri'ah swooned over him, most everyone assumed he would go on to become a knight simply because of the whole 'dashing knight in armour' stereotype.

He's the sort of guy you see playing someones grandpa in a film and you're like "wait hes so hot though. now i wanna see what he looked like when he was younger" and then you get mad because HOW CAN PEOPLE BE SO GORGEOUS THEIR ENTIRE LIVES HUH. HOW IS THAT FAIR.

I feel like his looks are not really something he openly acknowledges or even really realises - I guess this ties in to my oddly specific Pierro headcanons ((gives that old man a million mental illnesses and refuses to elaborate)) but i imagine he gets really really caught up in the minor details and just sort of passively sees himself as very just .. 'whatever', despite just how many people have always told him how handsome and beautiful he is.

Like, of course he'll thank them for the compliment but in his head he has like 90 rebuttals and genuinely convinces himself that theyre just saying it to be nice/polite/to get in his good graces/whatever. man has imposter syndrome out the wazoo .

I think he definitely aged very finely and gracefully, all things considered, but his obsessive fear of aging physically makes him feel like he hasnt. but to me . old man pierro is the most gorgeous . perfect.

[flakytartart]

[godisasimp]

So my canon is that Sparkle doesn't exist and actually vita is weirdly flirting with Leyah she's already doing that well i suppose Vita just Vitad her way through everything and everything happened relatively the same and also Kiana is still in a coma playing Elden Ring DLC she was not visited by a pink weirdo.

[hopeswriting]

[ID copied from alt text: Screenshot of a bookmark of one of my stories on Archive Of Our Own. The part screenshoted reads, "Skull, my man, had the longest chapter because Author is a simp." /End ID]

read to filth before getting murdered in broad daylight 😭

[sailoraquila]

I get the Old Man Yaoi from OPLA but am I the only one thirsting over Chef Zeff???