things from the tsunami arc that altered my brain chemistry irrevocably and eternally:
buck's hand twisted in christopher's shirt pre-wave
you're gonna be okay, kid and the hand on buck's face
the way buck cups christopher's head when he's finally got him in his arms
and the way he clings to christopher as soon as they're up on the fire truck for the rest of the episodes, always keeping chris nestled against his side or tucked under his chin whenever he's not saving people
how he freezes when he hears christopher fall in and just Knows its chris
buck finding christopher's glasses
the fact that we see the moment buck cuts himself and he doesn't even react because he's too heartbroken to feel anything else besides the grief
do i even need to mention buck carrying himself through most of LA on willpower alone?
or the black tent?
or buck calling maddie and not even worrying about telling eddie, just worrying about christopher, until he sees him at the VA hospital?
or how eddie nods as buck stammers through his explanation like he believes that its not buck's fault even as his heart is breaking over losing his child?
or the way buck hands eddie christopher's glasses?
or he was looking for buck?
how about the way eddie presses his forehead to christopher's temple?
and the Look between buck and eddie? buck, disbelieving, relieved, just utterly and completely relieved because whatever happens next, even if he never gets to see his diaz boys again, at least christopher is alive. and eddie, disbelieving, relieved, entirely and wondrously in awe of the man that kept his son safe and alive despite a tsunami.
and buck collapsing because finally, finally his job is done. nothing else matters now.
not to mention!!! the After
wait for me to come home my beloved <3
buck's whole voiceover
the way chris walks into the loft and rests his head against buck's stomach, trusting him to wrap him in a hug, and the way buck hesitates like he's not sure he's allowed
eddie pushing in, eddie, the strong silent type, filling the silence that buck would usually to try to drown (poor choice of words, i admit) out whatever thoughts are going through buck's head as he tries to object to being left alone
eddie's instantaneous, easy switch from nonchalant teasing to serious reassuring
two men five centimetres apart because they are gay!
eddie's hand on buck's shoulder and the fucking thumb on his neck... kill me :D
eddie being honest and vulnerable about his parenting
i love him enough to never stop trying and i know you do too because of course eddie has just had more than enough evidence of that, and not just evidence but tsunami-proof evidence that buck would quite literally go to the ends of the earth for christopher, but this quote, buddie or not, links buck to christopher, to that co-parent role, indefinitely and irrefutably
eddie's little comment about buck losing weight (sir... why are you paying so much attention 🤨)
and FUCK, perhaps the worst of them all, eddie pausing in the doorway, one hand on the doorframe, eyes down as he says buck's name and that little moment of hesitation before he looks up and says thank you. for not giving up.
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sorry i'm gonna be insufferable about the final casting for s2 but just. yt ppl you seriously don't know what it's like to never see yourselves in media. or to only see yourselves in side characters who might be killed off or dropped or stereotyped or denied any sort of narrative power. you don't know what it's like to believe that you're inherently undesirable because no one who looks like you ever gets a thoughtful arc. you don't know what it's like to feel as though your own life/death is foreclosed because no one who looks like you or who comes from your culture survives in mainstream media. and yeah, sure, representation is NOT liberation, but you don't know how it fucking wears on you to NEVER be visible, to be told no matter what you are NEVER legible, unless you slot into a very specific trope that serves whiteness. not YOU. never YOU.
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Hello GT, I absolutely love Lionheart!
I published my first fic and have been dealing with some criticism; it’s not anythjng super hateful, but it’s not anything meant to make me improve either. I’ve been feeling sort of down because of it. My question is: have you ever dealt with hate or criticism before? What is your attitude towards it?
I find your work and answers on here super insightful and inspiring! I hope you have a nice day ❤️
Fuck em. Like, seriously, just fuck em. There's a time and place for writers to take critique and be strict with themselves; it's necessary for any artist to grow. That place is with a chosen group of creatives whose work you admire and whose judgment you trust. A rando on the Internet, while they may in fact be the next Marcel Proust, probably isn't. And I was raised to believe that while it's appropriate and kind to pay compliments to strangers when they're performing — just as you'd smile at a busker on the sidewalk, and or compliment a chalk artist — it's not appropriate to criticize them when what they do isn't to your tastes. They're providing you with their art for free. No one forced you to read it; no one forced you to listen. If you don't like it, it costs $0 to shut the fuck up.
Also — that thing I said about artists taking critique? That assumes that you're doing this out of a desire to improve your writing, which, while noble, is not actually a thing you need to do if you're a hobby writer. I like trying to improve; it makes me feel good. But at the end of the day, I do this for fun. I do this because in my real job, I am ruthless and self-critical and try really fucking hard to do well, and you need parts of your life that Aren't Like that. You need parts of your life where you're not worrying about whether you're Doing It Right. And living without that anxiety of critique is, paradoxically, the only way you'll find the artistic courage to take risks and develop new skills. Everyone is a little bit rough around the edges to begin with. (Not saying you're a beginner — you merely said "publish," and I certainly wrote a lot of things before I started publishing! But every artist is always trying to develop new skills and techniques; in the grand scope of things, we're all beginners.) Giving someone blunt critique when they're in the beginning phases of their journey as an artist is about as helpful as screaming at your six-year-old kid because he can't swim the butterfly.
And the thing is, these people will bluster and say "well, I'm just being honest, I'm just trying to be helpful," but like: mmmmmmno, you're not! You're not. And it's disingenuous to say so. Because if you were actually trying to be helpful, you would introduce yourself, offer your skills as an editor/beta reader, and start building the relationship of trust that grounds any meaningful co-creative partnership. People do not just accept random critique that comes flying at them from the blue nowhere. And issuing it in that form is the best way to make them hostile, defensive, and unreceptive to it. Delivering harsh feedback without a context of care and support is almost sure to fail as a method of actually changing behavior, and either (1) you know that, and are doing it anyway — presumably because you want people to know how Terribly Clever and Better At Writing you are, or (2) you sincerely have never thought about the effect that context and word choice have on how other people receive your meaning.
Which tells me you are the last fucking person on the planet I want writing advice from.
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