#i say that as a joke but also i do think beatles fans should be glad they broke up when they did.

[marklikely]

so much blame to yoko ono for "breaking up the beatles" . not enough blame to paul regularly making the other guys record goofy songs that they hated

[live-laugh-legolas]

What type of music the fellowship listens to (modern)

Aragorn:

-Country man

-Idk if he even actually listens to it, but I swear every guy on tinder has country music in their interests and I think it is just a go to answer

-“what kind of music do you like?” “Idk, country I guess”

-Likes the depressed indie artists

-✨John Mayer✨

Legolas:

-Idk if anyone is going to agree with me on this but I think he’s into metal music

-I also think he would love Eminem

-He knows every lyric

-Not the type to dance or even show that he’s listening to music, but he actually has music blasting in his ears

-Ik elves have like sensitive ears or whatever but let me have this one

-Wannabe emo kid

Boromir:

-I think he likes pop music but listens almost purely to covers

-“I knew them before they were famous” vibes

-Loves artists like Elton John, Elvis Presley, the Beatles, etc

-Also side note, this man cannot sing but absolutely goes hard at karaoke

Gimli:

-He’s a T-Swift fan

-Also Celine Dion

-I just think he likes the girl bosses

-P!nk, Halsey, and Shawn Mendez because I just thought of it so he must be a girl boss too

-Gets emotional listening to music; like totally matches the energy of the song

-Sometimes I just cry because an artist just sounds so good, and I think he would do the same

Frodo:

-The “aesthetic” music

-You know the ones that kinda go hard but also sound kinda bad if you actually listen to them?

-I was just listening to “Butch 4 Butch” by Rio Romeo and I just got the vibe that Frodo would vibe

Sam:

-I just feel like he likes rap music

-Not aggressive rap, but when songs have rap in them

-Post-Malone sort of vibes

-Also “TikTok songs” but just the part that’s played in the few seconds of the video

Merry:

-Classical music

-But like the classical music that goes hard

-Like “O Fortuna” maybe

-But he also sings JoJo Siwa and no one knows if it’s satire or genuine

-“KARMAS A BITCH!”

Pippin:

-Hozier boy

-The girls, the gays, and the Pippin ya know?

-But also K-Pop

-I don’t know anything about the genre but I have a friend who literally know every dance to every song from Black Pink and I think that’s how Pip would be

-He will have me watch him do the dances and I can just imagine Pippin doing the same thing; putting on little recitals and you just can’t say no

Gandalf:

-Joe Rogan podcasts

-Ok that’s a joke

-But definitely listens to podcasts, maybe ones about science

-Enjoys some good smooth jazz

-Gets real groovy when a saxophone starts playing

*Bonus Faramir and/or Eomer:

-I’ll be honest I don’t know these characters as well as I should

-but

-Recently my sister has had her earbuds in 24/7 and I asked her about it and she has apparently been listening to Dr Who audio dramas

-She is trying to convince me to listen too but frankly I’m too scared

-There was something about a sentient puddle?

-I just feel like one of the characters would do this and these are the two I decided on but lmk if I’m totally wrong

[m1ssunderstanding]

Get Back Rewatch 55 Years On: Day Two

Paul and Ringo cabaret duo au NOW!

Their collective bitter humor about the fan mag. I think George probably appreciates Paul getting into this sort of shit with him. Even if it is only on a surface-level. A reminder that the Beatles fame journey (something that's been hellish at times for George, enough to give him PTSD and other issues for the rest of his life) has not left Paul unscathed. That Paul actually does have feelings, however buried they may be.

Could even be that the appreciation comes out in the form of "I think your beard suits you. Man." Does the tacked-on 'man' mean a sort of "no homo" type qualifier? Or is it just an added endearment. I know we don't think of George as particularly inhibited, but it was the sixties. And of course Paul loves the compliment and has no idea what to do with it.

Can you all please thank Mal as he hands you your tea next time? Not that hard, guys.

Ringo's voice is so sexy. And I love how supportive Paul and George are of this very stupid song. If either of them had written it, they'd tear it to shreds, but it's Ringo, so we laugh along and enthuse about the sentiments behind the lyrics.

The communal bitching about EMI's treatment of them. As they should.

Oh goodness, it's the "Paul has an embarrassing crush" moment from that iconic post of @jeremy-hillary-boob He totally does and you should say it. "I never used to know what it meant". It's giving "girl pretends not to know how to hold her golf club so the hot guy will touch her".

I have a theory that some of their covers ~matter~ and "What do you want to make those eyes at me for?" Is the first one for me.

Okay this look right here that John is giving Paul? Not to, like, out myself as never having experienced pure love except from my own child or anything, but the only other place I've ever seen that look is on my one-year-old's face when I come get him from his nap. So ... "A lovely little baby, John was"

"If this boy dies, you're gonna cop it." Peak older brother behavior. He's joking, but he's also deadly serious.

In love with John trying to sing out of his range. He's trying so hard, you guys.

"Everybody had a hard year. 'well, I'm not sure, actually. Put [good year]." Same, John. Isn't it always that way? Hard. And good. He's such a genius lyricist. He just captures the human condition with such specificity.

Lol at Paul correcting John on the key of his own song (yeah, yeah, gimme some truth is secretly a colab but it's still a John song)

When they put a piano in front of Paul and John's instantly like "uh-oh, red-alert my beautiful boyfriend might not get captured perfectly from every angle" vs a year and a half later when he's bitching about Paul having too much screen-time in Let it Be. Well, you were part of the problem, babe.

I love George's way of teaching his songs. Whereas Paul was shouting key changes and counts between phrases, and John doesn't even bother to give any of that information, George is just softly singing "E, to F sharp minor. E to A." Beautiful. John and Paul, take notes.

Wonder if I'll get through a day without calling Paul a whore. Probably not.

John being instantly self-effacing after suggesting that genius little let's enhancement. "My mind can blow those clouds away" is actually much more original and thought-provoking, but John just makes fun of himself. Like. Just own it. You're John fucking Lennon!

The George/Paul convo (George talking, Paul hardly flinching) is so painful actually. Because from the outside, Paul's avoidance looks so condescending and unfeeling, but avoidance feels much more like 'Shit fuck shit dodge the fight, go around, don't react, don't engage, don't start something' and i really feel for both of them.

Let John do Help for gosh sakes!

"Not bad though. Good try, that. Johnny."

The part where Paul is looking just so exhausted, and he's actually letting it show, and then he sees the camera on him and hurries and tries to do a cheeky little Beatles head-shake and smile. But then he's really just too tired (and high) and he looks away and rubs his eyes. It was like watching an old circus bear. Those poor things.

And of course John's head snapping up like a little gopher when Paul says his name

[terrible-influence-tour-reviews]

Tit review from cph!

Show was so good!!! Have been a fan of them for over a decade but this was my first time seeing them live, and I have to say I was a little nervous about how they would on stage (as someone who's done clearly a decade of theater, some of it semi professional) but found myself incrediblely impressed by how good of preformers they are and how naturally funny too! The q&a was great but they didn't make it very clear that the phlit was for questions which kinda sucked. We were told it was if we "had a message for Dan and Phil" which me and my friends found very unclear. Merch bundle for vip was a little weak too sadly, not terrible but I would have hoped for a little more for the price of tickets (compared to other vip bags I've gotten before)

Had the m&g and they were super nice but Dan was definitely more proactive if that makes sense? I'm a little scared I came off as a Dan girly but I really adore both of them lol. Felt a little rushed but it was also my first time doing a m&g so I probably should have been a little more assertive but I was panicking lol. Seats were kinda weird to but I think that was more of the venues fault than their team but I hope if they come again it will be a theater and not just an event hall. the sexfire and Beatles jokes were incredible tho.

Overall very good experience, the show is so incredible and so gay. Still not sure what stunt Phil cracked a rib on tho lmao

I'm glad you had a good time.

I think that maybe the ones that aren't questions they can still take home and read. (I have a letter for Phil and I can't afford gold vip so I'm putting it in the phlit in an envelope and hoping for the best!)

I would also be nervous at the m&g - so I'm glad Dan was proactive about it. It would be, I suppose awkward, for them both to be like standing there waiting for fans to direct the experience if the fans didn't take charge. And you know for the next tour. (which I keep predicting in the hopes that I will be right.)

Also, you got beatles jokes? Idk if I blocked that out but pretty sure we didn't get that in antwerp.

I think someone should ask at a Q&A how Phil broke the rib and report back.

[bambi-kinos]

Can't Buy Me Love (Visual Novel)

I played the VN, quick and dirty game review I guess. I will keep under the cut below for spoilers. It's a short game so you won't lose a big time investment by playing it.

tl;dr - The game is an entire shitpost. John's route is the best. There should have been a Ringo route. Not the worst 30 minutes I've spent.

Stuff I Liked

The game is shitposty so if you've spent any time on r/beatlescirclejerk then you know what to expect. The art is nice and the character design on the Evil Mum was very good and distinctive. I hope Brummie does more landscape paintings because the one shot we get in the game was very beautiful and used lovely colors! Would love to see more of that in the future, I was sort of annoyed at the car being in the way because I wanted to see more lovely hills with sheep! But I'm also the kind of person who uses calendars with that kind of artwork on it so that's just a personal preference.

Appreciate the use of IRL photos as assets in the game to depict things like the stairway, it looks like Brummie may have used realtor photos from within the current day property which is nice! Katawa Shoujo used the same idea and it's a nice way to save on making new art assets, I haven't played indie VNs for a while so I don't know if this is a thing people do anymore now that Blender has taken over the world. It's a nice nostalgic feel though this may be just me.

There are 5 routes: Paul, George, John, True Ending, and Escape. I would recommend playing them in order of George, True Ending, Paul, and then John.

George: you get this by shoving back on Paul and John at every turn.

True Ending: Go along with everything Paul says, it's fine.

Paul: My memory is already fading but I think you have to push back on him but then go off with Paul during the kitchen fight, or at least I think that's how I did it. Very reminiscent of that anecdote about Mishima reenacting seppuku with a red silk piece in order to get off in front of a gay date. Which consequently also took place in the 1960s!

John: Push back on Paul and side with John during the kitchen scene. John's route is easily the funniest one in the game and is the one that actually made me laugh out loud. His key art is also the best one. Greatly recommend you save this until last, I don't think it hits as hard (funnily) without sitting through the other routes.

Escape: Choose the 'escape' option during the kitchen scene.

Stuff That Was 'Eh'

Wish there had been a Ringo route. Look at what you did to my boy. The Escape Route was also a bit disappointing with the forced quit, there could have been a lot of jokes made at Paul's expense! Imagine his investment running out on him like that, he could have been just like Orwell yelling about Sing Sing in Citizen Kane. Missed opportunity there I feel. Wish John's sex scene had detail like Paul's! I also wasn't a fan of the "not like other girls" jokes, those were frankly really lame due to being run into the ground approximately around 2015. Did not land and they were a drag.

The game was also missing out on some interactivity like making the kitchen clickable and explorable. It would have meant more assets but I would have appreciated it, otherwise the game is just kind of short. I am also sad we did not get a lesbian route of some kind. Paul does not count!

The constant stopping/starting on the Beatle facts dragged down the flow of the humor though to be fair with this kind of format I'm not sure if there's an alternative. If you don't have Beatle facts stopping the narrative to shitpost then maybe it gets a little too stuck and becomes dark with nothing to break it up? Who knows. I clicked past them.

Overall it's a 3/5 for me, it's a good first VN and God knows there have been worse. Play it for John's route, you won't be disappointed!

[numetaljackdog]

what i'm listening to 4/5/2023 (song notes under cut!)

spot. link//yt link

Laura Les - Haunted: haunted. by laura les.

100 gecs - Dumbest Girl Alive: yeah there's gonna be a fair few new gecs tracks in here. dumbest girl alive is my favorite from 10k, i can't even express how much it just hits every time. i love the riff, i love the lyrics, i love the music video, i love the production, love it love it love it. i also included a minecraft parody i found when searching the video on youtube, you're welcome

Black Flag - Revenge: i've been trying to rediscover my love for some of my favorite hardcore genres, so i took it all the way back to the early days and reconnected with one of my favorite bands. i encountered this song in high school when trying to find clean black flag songs that i could put in a piece i was writing about the history of metal (which the band is not, but hardcore is significant in the history of the genre anyway). it's a great thrash-and-basher and apparently has not been in my playlist until now, which i was unaware of lol

The Beatles - Strawberry Fields Forever: once again i must admit to listening to the beetles.... alas. look it's a really good song, the lead-in to the chorus is fucking amazing, the instrumentation is really interesting and unique, it just washes over you like waves of sound. plus it's goofy as hell

Jaga Jazzist - I Could Have Killed Him In The Sauna: from the INSTANT i heard the intro of this track i was like ohhh that's going in the next WILT. i don't have a ton to say about it, just listen. it's good sounds to chew on. shoutout io

100 gecs - Billy Knows Jamie: i freaked the fuck out when i heard this track, no joke. which is funny, because i'm pretty certain they played this when i saw them last fall, but i didn't have any frame of reference at the time for whether it would sound the same on the record. i just kept thinking "they did this for ME. SPECIFICALLY" because like hello??? i'm the nu metal gecs fan!!! that's like my whole thing!!!! and this literally sounds like limp bizkit half the time!!!!! i honestly kind of wouldn't mind if the breakdown at the end had been a little more restrained, just to preserve the feeling that it's 1999 all over again, but whatever. it cums. it's also about violence and killing, so i even get a little bit of like juggalo vibes almost

Fiona Apple - To Your Love: this song sounds so sexyyyy like maybe this is out of pocket but when this came on shuffle on a singer-songwriter playlist i was browsing i literally stopped what i was doing and was just like 😳😳😳 it's insane. and like when her voice gets all growly at one point later in the track... anyway haha

Marnie Stern - Prime: found via that coolass video i reblogged a while back oh god let's see if i can find that. holy shit i can't believe that worked. i don't know anything about marnie stern but i should listen to more because prime knocked the wind out of me it's good

100 gecs - The Most Wanted Person In The United States: last gecs track... and it's more rap rock!!! kind of. did you guys catch that cypress hill sample? i sure did!!!! love itttt. plus there's more killing it's so awesome. i've already said most of this stuff to violet (hi violet) but for real i think "got anthony kiedis suckin on my penis" is one of the all-time greatest bars and i'm not joking

DJ Lycox - BILLIE JEAN (DIOR): a lot of music from people on here this month! one of my mutuals (who probably won't read this but if you do. hi :3) posted this track and i really love the original pop smoke song so i was like right what's all this then. it's good. that's what it is then

Bruce Springsteen - Born to Run: i was reading this article about bruce springsteen being a sort of icon for butch womanhood and that had me like wow i am feeling emotions right now. and so i went and listened to some springsteen and you know what he rocks. there's something so desperate and heartbreaking about his songwriting, it hits me in a real way. and i've never even been to new jersey

Ada Rook - 920LONDON: new rook album ooh yeah babey. not my fav record she's ever done but still really fucking good. this song kind of reminds me of everlong, which like. girl who's only ever listened to everlong by the foo fighters listening to her second song: getting a lot of everlong by the foo fighters vibes from this. but still it's about holding each other close and making the most of what we have in our rapidly passing time, plus the riffs are kind of similar in ways that i don't feel like fudging musical terminology to try and describe

Sarah Vaughan - Lullaby Of Birdland: cool jazz can be kind of whatever but y'know i'm a vocals girlie and sarah vaughan honestly probably deserves to be listed up there with the greats. her vocal control is insane, and the way she just drifts from her higher register to the lower and back again is hypnotic. good fucking song plus shows props to charlie parker

May Leitz - gODKILLER: another from tumblr, thanks to user bigbaywindow for directing me towards may leitz ^_^ i have been rocking with several of her songs but this was the first one i listened to and it's really good, the lyrics hit me in a certain way as well that some of you might guess. also while putting together the youtube playlist i discovered that may makes youtube videos including one that i've seen floating around my recommended page a couple of times?? so i guess i'll have to see what's goin on over there

The International Sweethearts Of Rhythm - Vi Vigor: am i like. crazy. i would have SWORN that i put this in a previous WILT but i can find no evidence of that being true. in any case this is a cool kinda bebop-inspired jazz piece by an all-woman jazz ensemble who i wanna listen to more of. there's some really great sax work on here especially, so if you're into that def check this one out

Girls Rituals - Hole/The Used: okay funny story on this one. this was the first song i ever heard from any of devi's projects, it was before i even really knew who black dresses was. this song appeared in my release radar and i was like "who the fuck is this" and i'm convinced it only happened because the title is the names of two bands which i WAS already listening to at the time. and i listened to the song and said "this is really bad, and i don't understand why anyone would listen to this." and then i mostly forgor about it. skip forward to recently - i am obviously a big fan of devi's work and plenty of other projects adjacent to this. i get a big new batch of songs in my playlist (hello again to violet shoutout violet) and this song is in here. i listen to it. it's good :) take that, me from two years ago

The Buggles - The Plastic Age: the mandatory Todd Find™ for this month. i was watching the one hit wonderland episode on these guys and honestly didn't pay attention too closely bc i was busy but this song stuck. you guys know i'm all about that campy futurey cyberpunk-adjacent shit. it would be a stretch to say this fully gets there but it's still a fun song either way

Cage The Elephant - Cigarette Daydreams: lame song honestly but the chorus is super catchy plus there's a story. when i was working my old job there was a supervisor i liked a lot who played a wide range of tunes on shift. sometimes it was chill instrumental stuff, sometimes it was metalcore, and sometimes it was like this sort of radio alternative shit. this song specifically would play a lot, as you can imagine, and at the time it annoyed me, especially because of how catchy it is, it would make me think of work. but now both that supervisor and i have left, and so now it just reminds me of vibing with them and making the most of being on the clock. a cigarette daydream indeed

Jason Segel & Walter - Man Or Muppet: i don't know, man. i've had this song stuck in my head since i was eight years old and one day i randomly thought "i wonder if that's on streaming" and it is

[what-if-nct]

hi i exist and i had a dream about me having eggs with jj0ng. it’s safe to say that i’m finally undepressed and i’m writing a story on ao3.

which leads me to my question, how do you stop yourself from procrastinating? idk if you know, but i wanted to ask in case if you did. i do like your posts as always even though i’m shy to make any tumblr posts as of this time. i had just introduced myself to live journal and i’m using it just to make fake old posts of me thirsting over shinee, tvxq and snsd because i miss that era of being a kpop fan and i wish i lived through it myself. every time someone screams “my ovaries” would make my heart cry. i miss teenagers being… well… teenagers. it’s sad that we might not see golden content like these anymore, but at least i have a space to act like i did because i’m delulu and need to be stopped.

Hii! Wholesome dreams are definitely a true antidepressant. Oh I procrastinate all the time. I even procrastinate eating and putting up my groceries. Like I don't buy milk, eggs or real meat. It's fine but there's still hummus, cheese and tofu so after i remember that i do it. But something I do that does help me especially with posts is I give myself a deadline like you have this post half written in your drafts try to get it finished by the end of the week and give yourself an incentive. Like if I clean my closet by the end of today I can buy my whole shopping cart on whatever site I want. I think cause that's how it was when I was a kid. After school or summer camp especially if we were fussy in the morning our grandma would have some kind of treat or toy for us when we got back so we knew if we go to school that means we'll get a hula hoop or ice cream or cookie when we got back. So I think you should try rewarding yourself for when you finally do something you've been meaning to do. I hope that is helpful for you. Also don't feel guilty if you don't do something you can always change your idea if the current one isn't inspiring you I do that all the time and it always works out better than your original idea. I was a kpop fan around that time. I totally remember the my ovaries or my ovaries exploded thing. I see some current version of that and it's like "I am ovulating right now I can't handle this" but I think its usually like people a little older at least I just follow people around my age.. I've definitely said it But I think just creating that atmosphere for yourself is great. I have noticed that a lot of younger fans are extremely puritanical I've never seen anything like it. I was like 15 when I became a kpop fan so it was different and even fans of elvis and the Beatles were similar in the 50s and 60s. Like not even jokes about idols smoking are even allowed. Like honey that's a grown man. It's okay he smokes and it's okay when especially adults find him sexy when he's behaving in a sexy manner that's the idea. It's only a problem when that's all you see them for and all they are to you is a sex symbol thats the only time it's a problem. It's fine if you don't want to do that I especially think so if it's a 30 year old man probably dont do that. But don't shame those who do it when it's called for. I think it's just the vicious attacks I have a problem with. I will never forgive Armys for what they did to cupcakke, she's the same age as Jungkook for goodness sake.

[the-mozzarella-brothers]

Fucking genocide lover. I am a trans person from Palestine. Those are my people you're killing. That's our genocide you're endorsing. You think voting changes things, then fucking accept the reality that YOU ARE COMPLICIT in the genocide of my people. You people are DEEPLY evil, I can't even put it into words how horrified I am that people like you exist. But go on, continue to endorse genocide. Continue to pretend to be ignorant. Pretend I'm a conservative or a troll. It's what you people have always done. It's what you people always do. It's what you people always will do. When they say to listen to the voices of the oppressed, they don't mean white Americans complicit in the genocide of my culture, my family, my people.

Hi! i havent gotten anon hate in ages. i was worried for a bit. i also havent heard the greeting “fucking genocide lover” yet, it sounds interesting, i might start using it. (im kidding btw) jokes aside, i dont love genocide. i dont think the genocide in gaza (im not sure if id personally call it a genocide based on the ICJ ruling but lets put that aside for now and pretend i would) is good at all. whether its a genocide or not, people are still dying, and that is objectively bad.

id like to say that i am not directly killing anyone, and as far as i know, im not killing anyone indirectly either. i sure hope im not at least.

id like to say, that as much as i despise hamas and what they did on october seventh and what they are still doing, does NOT mean i support, like, or think that bibi is a good person or prime minister. i absolutely hate him and always have. what he is doing right not is absolutely NOT the way to go about the current situation.

i do not think ANYONE deserves to die, very much including any palestestian or israeli civilians (as well as ukrainian civilians and any other civilians experiencing war or genocide). even the hamas and bibi, do not deserve to die, in my opinion. they deserve a life sentence in jail where they can do no harm to anyone.

i think that this war should end as soon as possible with a PERMANENT ceasefire, a two state solution, with people in power in both countries who are interested in PEACE.

regarding “its what you people have always done. its what you people always do. whats what you people always will do.” who is “you people”?. is it jews? “zionists”? fans of the beatles? you are not specific, who is it? all jews (that i have met) do not endorse genocide. all zionists i have met do not endorce genocide. not sure about beatles fans, thats too broad for me to say, i havent talked about this topic to many of them. if it is jews, id like it if you actually talked to us properly, maybe we could figure something out.

id like to say that im extremely sorry you are going through whats happening in gaza, i only directly know whats happening in israel and i know its stressful there and whats happening in gaza is worse so i hope you keep surviving until the war is over, maybe our countries will be able to live in peace, and we can be friends :) i hope you and your family are doing okay :)

[zombiepirates]

starting the blog off strong with my funny little hcs/redesigns for the main 4

read more for a looooong list of hcs

okay here we go

edd:

- 5'9

- half korean half white

- 26 in the end

- bi and the token cis friend, uses he/him pronouns

- built like a muscular santa LOL, definitely physically the strongest of the main four

- has lots of moles all over

- likes to have a clean shaven face but gets lazy sometimes. he has hairy arms, legs, etc

- OBVIOUSLY listens to the beatles his cat is named ringo. also is a pink floyd, journey, rolling stones, and led zepplin enjoyer. he likes bo burnham too

- i see his personality as being like. he doesn't start chaos but boy is he happy to join in and be along for the ride.

- actually is pretty apathetic a lot of the time *points at pre legacy edd who wants nothing to do with his friends when he has to put effort into the relationship*

- gets so competitive over every. little. thing.

- has adhd , was hyperactive as a kid but now struggles to muster the energy to do anything that doesn't relate to a hyperfixation (animation and writing comics are the major ones)

- tics as a result of his adhd which pisses him off especially when he's drawing

- also stims quite a lot ☺ canonically gets flappy hands + his "broccoli!" is ABSOLUTELY a stim r u kidding

- still has leftover powers from poweredd! they aren't always there but if he feels threatened they can pop up. his eyes turn completely green when he uses powers 😮

- really quick on his feet and is always able to pull the boys out of trouble if need be (big reason why he naturally falls into a leadership position)

- only eats junk food unless someone sits him down and forces him to eat a proper meal. eats really frequently too, always has a bag of chips and cola within arms reach

- drinks and smokes 🍃 socially but never by himself. isn't a fan of anything with nicotine

- likes beer and whiskey, and takes 🍃 in pretty much any form without a preference

- his green hoodie is a comfort item so he is p much always wearing it, even in the summer. otherwise wears t shirts and cargo pants

- his lucky can is also a comfort item

- vibes really well with tom! they're both really chill and mellow when around eachother. they like to talk about movies together

- when with matt his energy level is definitely boosted. they like to go out to eat, go to the mall, and ofc go to amusement parks

- tord activates the competitive part of his personality lol. they butt heads a lot but most of the time it's in a joking way. loooove to play video games together

tom:

- 6'1

- black

- 25 in the end

- bi with a male preference, doesn't label his gender but is somewhere inbetween agender and male. uses he/it/they pronouns

- messes with his hair a lot, most of the time it is bleached more than it should be. it sometimes has shoulder length locs which he'll tie into a ponytail

- has many scars up his arms and thighs

- has tons of piercings everywhere bc he uses it as a form of sh and figures nobody will notice (tord totally does n worries but never says anything)

- muscular arms and chest bc he works out when he's mad (which is. frequently!)

- has stubble and very thick + usually untrimmed sideburns. also lots of body hair

- nails are usually painted black

- enjoys ska punk fashion

- has lots of patchwork and embroidery on his clothing. wears tons of accessories , chains, rubber bracelets, belts, fingerless gloves, yada yada

- ok im abt to rapidfire list artists i think it listens to bc. he loves music so <3

sublime, queen, david bowie, radiohead, ac/dc, abba, nirvana, oasis, deftones, korn, the smashing pumpkins, neutral milk hotel, the smiths, pavement, violent femmes, and pixies

- a lot of ppl write him as like. always serious and deadpan, never experiences joy. THIS IS INCORRECT!!!!! this is literally the guy whose running bit is "random xd"

- tom is the first to make a joke out of a shitty situation, in fact his inability to read the room causes problems sometimes. he def made jokes about tord after the end and it made edd and matt massively uncomfortable

- also sometimes makes those awkward self deprecating jokes that are not funny but. he's working on it

- relies on situational humor to be funny

- generally is quiet unless he wants to make a lil snide remark or someone speaks directly to him

- ......unless he's drunk. GOD does he love to talk when he's drunk. usually about himself, although it could either be "i'm worthless" or "i'm awesome and sexy"

- SO BAD WHEN PPL HAVE EMOTIONS... lacks empathy so if someone cries in front of him he has no clue how to react

- very possessive + protective of susan and tomee bear

- *unfolds list and puts on reading glasses* has depression, mild social anxiety (was bad in hs but is getting better), adhd, ocd, bipolar, + insomnia and obviously issues with alcohol. sorry for making him mentally ill it is simply how i see him

- his alc addiction is actually a lot better than it was pre legacy :] especially post the end he is able to occasionally drink socially without it being an issue

- of course i will talk abt monster tom omg. so their monster traits (super strength, increased height, claws, horns, tail) will appear when he feels any super intense emotion no matter what it is. it's typically painful but not always , n its very rare that it assumes full monster form without injections from tord/the red army

- his pessimistic nature comes in handy bc edd and matt don't think abt the risks or possibility of failure for a lot of things so tom is able to reel 'em back and help ground everybody

- forgets to eat all. the. time. and when he DOES eat, it's at like 3am when he grabs a plain bagel from the kitchen

- prefers vodka when drinking but will take anything. not a huge fan of hard seltzers or beer though bc they don't get him drunk enough. i think they prolly like taking edibles to calm their nerves and likes to smoke weed with tord

- probably has a juul that he gets too embarrassed to use outside of his room . not as into nicotine as tord but certainly enjoys it

- makes money as a film composer .. he loves what he does but also wishes he could be a director

- used to work part time at the local bar but uhmmmm

- tom and matt just enjoy being in eachothers company tbh. if they're sittin in the same room on their phones both of them will consider it a good time! tom also likes to play matt music

- i could write a whole essay on tom and tord's relationship but i have so many thoughts i can't even figure out my train of thought. my god

- they bond a lot over hating things LOL they'll watch stupid movies just to laugh at. tom will go on a rant about how he wishes he had the budget to make a blockbuster film and tord just listens

- tom is secretly interested in tord's inventions but would never ask about them so as not to boost his ego LOL

matt:

- 6'4

- white

- 26 in the end

- unlabeled sexuality, almost exclusively likes men. genderfluid and uses he/they + comes up with new neos for himself biweekly

- an absolute twig with very little muscle. he does have very broad shoulders however which gives the illusion he might be anything other than a string bean

- his hair is in awful condition because he treats it horribly 😵 it's naturally curly but since middle school he has straightened and put gel in it daily

- nails always look very nice, sometimes gets extravagant and colorful manicures but usually just has french tips. their nails are quite long

- has long canines and a bite mark scar on his neck

- covered head to toe in freckles

- little to no body hair, they barely have to shave bc they simply don't grow much

- big fan of maximalism in fashion and interior decor

- has his ears pierced and a little stud on his nose

- really enjoys music, listens to madonna, kesha, the millionaires, marina, britney spears, doja cat, avril lavigne, and of course

gwen stefani

- yes he is stupid but not. THAT. stupid. this dude was the leader of a zombie army .

- he's very smart when it comes to manipulating people and likes to use his charm and good looks to get what he wants

- HOWEVER . they lack some common sense. he definitely would use his phone flashlight to check a clock in the middle of the night LOL

- struggles to understand sarcasm a lot of the time

- constantly seeking validation from the boys and ESPECIALLY tom. tom isn't the most affectionate so when tom compliments him his brain explodes /pos

- he was that kid in elementary school with nut allergies n all the adults catered to him LMFAOOOO

- has cute petnames for the boys (dimples for edd, teddy bear for tom, captain for tord) also uses handsome as a name for all of them rather than an adjective lol. he calls tord sunshine when he wants to peeve him

- goes ALL OUT for holidays!!! decorating and gift giving sparks joy

- took french in high school and actually enjoyed it a lot, he's almost fluent

- likes going to parties bc he's constantly understimulated so bright lights and loud music = A GOOD TIME

- always has incense or a candle burning

- has sensory issues with a lot of food (canon example would be him not able to eat ice cream bc it hurts his teeth)

- autistic , ocd and bpd haver . i specifically think he has ocd because of his compulsive hoarding

- actually has a decent eating schedule 😱😱 he eats a lot of fruit . don't ask why i know this i simply can just see it

- enjoys drinking quite a lot actually, they're a big fan of fancy cocktails. enjoys edibles but HATES smoking and vaping, coughs a lot when he does. probably vomited his first time smoking and was traumatized ever since lol

- works at a novelty toy shop in an outlet mall 😁😁 really genuinely loves his job and is so sweet to customers .

- he is still a vampire! thankfully since modern mirrors are not backed by silver he can see his beautiful face🙏

- can't eat garlic and can't be out in the sun for very long without a parasol

- is good at comforting the boys when they're upset, not great at giving advice but they're a great listener and shoulder to cry on

- likes to watch anime with tord 👍 although they have very different taste in anime for the most part, both of them enjoy shounen

tord:

- 5'2

- white

- 26 in the end

- i know. logically.  in canon he definitely likes women (see: kim and katya) but it is simply my opinion that he's only attracted to anime girls and when interacting with irl women he's uncomfortable

- that being said he's gay and transmasc, uses he/him. he was so quiet before leaving and then when he comes back he's  suddenly super boisterous and can't shut up? there's no way he didn't start T and get top surgery in the time he was gone

- muscular from being in the army but when he takes time off to work on inventions he'll eat exclusively instant noodles and takeout so he has some pudge on his tummy, hips and thighs

- scars all over which he claims are from combat training but are just from him being careless with his weapons

- massive eye bags bc his sleeping schedule is horrid

- started bleaching and dying his hair a much lighter brown about a year before leaving , when he gets depressed or too consumed in his work his roots can grow out a decent bit though

- had lots of acne as a teen but is finally free in his 20s

- bites his nails so they look VERY ugly lmao

- sharp teeth >:)

- can get pretty tan in the summer and has freckles on his face, arms, and shoulders

- can't grow facial hair 😒😒 has hair pretty much everywhere else though

- has a few ear piercings and a tongue piercing

- pre legacy tord was emo and legacy tord / red leader is military goth

- since tord was emo in high school and he simply never decided to find to new music his playlists just have ptv, old p!atd, paramore etc...

- he likes hentai in canon so i'm going to pretend that automatically means he is an anime enjoyer! his alltime fav is code geass because r u kidding. a mecha anime abt a guy taking over the world using intellect rather than brute force .

- he also enjoys fooly cooly, death note, mobile suit gundam, promare, fma:b, evangelion, and gurren lagann

- his fav anime characters are lelouch and asuka <3

- his personality pre legacy is . MASSIVELY different  . he was kind of jst like "i'll keep my head down unless A. edd or tom tries to start shit or B. i get to talk about the military or weapons" LOL

- he always knew he was destined for something greater though and had been working on blueprints and finding materials for his giant robot since hs

- started building it a few years before he left . i like to think he didn't take it with him because he knew if he did he wouldn't have a reason to ever see edd, matt, or tom again

- already had connections to paul and pat , they kept in contact after school bc it was always the plan that they would take over the world together

- i think tord stayed in the army seen in moving targets, rose through the ranks, and slowly but surely included more and more of his own ideals into the teachings n trainings of new recruits until eventually they broke off and became the red army

- paul did basically the same thing in his branch of the army and then conjoined it with tord's, pat and yuu being in paul's branch (i hc yanov was in tord's)

- tord is very good at manipulating people into thinking they know what they want which is how he was able to keep soldiers on his side despite being a communist in the uk which is. very much capitalistic!

- even before joining the army he didn't have a job because he can't keep a regular job for life of him. instead he does the majority of the cleaning around the house

- does that silly thing where he forgets words in english so he's like "the uhmm... the thing! with the! yknow !"

- curses in norwegian

- refers to the boys by their full name (edward, matthew, thomas) if he wants to emphasize a point or really get their attention

- defaults to babe or doll as a petname. calls edd and matt his "brave soldiers" in a sweet way and for tom its in a condescending way

- forgets to shower often 😶 typically smells like cigars, gunpowder, oil + grease and sweat

- very intuitive

- a little too confident about his intellect though so when he gets humbled. the man is in Shambles

- has adhd , aspd, bipolar, c-ptsd and insomnia (these boys are all mentally ill)

- not a huge fan of drinking because he's a little Too emotionally vulnerable for his liking and gets uncomfortably hot, if he does drink he'll almost always have bourbon . enjoys smoking pot a whole lot but almost always does it by himself because he gets giggly, flirtatious, and very willing to dump out all his secrets . is very very very addicted to nicotine (strongly prefers cigars but will also use cigarettes, doesn't vape tho cuz he thinks it's uncool LMAO)

- POSSIBLY me being self indulgent with this hc but tord loooves shotgunning with his bfs more than anything  , he is so sad matt isn't into it

- is also with paul and pat but their relationship is much more casual than with edd matt and tom. tord cares more abt the success of his army and cause than kissing his handsome soldiers (unfortunately)

- tord and pat's relationship is like. tom and tord if they used their shared negative outlook on the world for a combined cause instead of a reason to fight constantly

- tord and pat struggle to talk about things other than the red army which upsets paul

- paul is kinda just here for the ride and loves pat and tord very dearly

- paul strokes tord's ego a bit more than what is probably safe lolololol

[nyx-lyris]

BTS Unpopular Opinions

alright - it’s bts unpopular (?) opinions time 

1. the james corden drama 

to say army overreacted to james corden’s tweet is like saying jar jar binks is considered a mildly irritating character by the star wars fandom. army’s reaction to his tweet was completely uncalled for and immature. 

for reference, the tweet in question read, “the united nations general assembly kicked off this morning in new york city and it started with some pretty unusual visitors - bts were there. historic moment. it actually marks the first time that 15-year-old girls everywhere found themselves wishing that they were secretary-general antonio guterres.” 

my understanding is that army got upset because james corden appeared to call army a bunch of fifteen-year-old girls. this comment was clearly sarcastic and meant to be taken as a joke, and army reacting the way they did was, as i said, uncalled for and immature. as james corden himself said, he is an army and an extremely enthusiastic one at that. he was making fun of the overzealous teenage girl stereotype often associated with artists like bts, one direction, the beatles, michael jackson, elvis, etc. again - he was making fun of the stereotype. he wasn’t trying to insult anyone. 

i am aware that the interviewers and show hosts that bts gets - in both korea and america - can be annoying and even outright rude and condescending at times. but james corden is not one of those people, and this reactionary mindset that army seems to have when something like this happens - whether someone makes a joke about bts, or someone expresses that they don’t like their music for one reason or another, or something else entirely - is extremely toxic. 

it also irritates me that namjoon appeared to be siding with army and their toxic reaction during the interview where this was addressed, and that everyone started laughing when james told the audience that he had received a comment that read, “i hope you die today.” how is that in any way funny? if someone sent that kind of comment to bts, army would be screaming - but because james corden made a joke that the fandom found offensive, it’s okay to send him death wishes? i don’t fucking think so. 

2. war of hormone 

war of hormone is not misogynistic or sexist in any way. it did not objectify women - it was just a song about a teenage boy (or several) noticing a girl, calling her sexy, and noticing the beauty of her physical appearance. as much as modern media likes to state otherwise, there is nothing wrong with that. especially if fans of bts and other kpop groups are allowed to make video compilations of them being sexy, make thirsty comments under their videos and post, lose their shit every time they show even a flash of skin, and read and write entire fucking books of smut imagines about them, i think bts - and other kpop artists for that matter - should feel free to make songs like war of hormone and others. either both men and women can do that, or neither of them can - that’s called equality, and i’m sick of people acting like men can’t express any kind of sexual interest in women, but women can express as much sexual interest in men as they like. 

3. taekook and jikook

this one is not as serious as the others, but it still bothers me, nonetheless. 

why is it that when people make fanart or write fanfiction about these couples, jungkook is always the dom? jungkook may have the whole bad boy package - i mean, he wears all black, he’s got a sleeve of tattoos, he works out - all he’s missing is a motorcycle and cigarettes. jimin may have a more feminine look than the other members. taehyung may be more into art than working out and exercise. but if you actually watch the footage of them - how they act and what they have to say about themselves and about each other - it’s clear that jungkook is not a dom. 

the other members, as well as he himself, have said that he is the baby of the group. the band basically raised him from the time he was fifteen - including taehyung and jimin. he is the youngest in his family. he is always acting like an adorable little muffin around them. i cannot count the number of times i have seen compilations made by fans of jungkook “being a baby.” just because he works out and has tattoos doesn’t mean he’s a dom. far from it. 

also, jimin and taehyung very intentionally flirt with the camera and act sexy on stage. when you watch jungkook, you can tell that - for the most part - he’s not trying to flirt with the camera or anything like that. he’s just performing, and he happens to look sexy while he’s doing it. jimin and taehyung know their power. jungkook doesn’t. 

anyway... so ends my rant. feel free to comment and agree/disagree with me. 

[mrepstein]

‘Man Who Runs the Beatles’ by Adrian Rawlins (The Australian Jewish News - June 19, 1964)

It was through this interview that Brian Epstein met photographer Robert Whitaker. Writer and poet Adrian Rawlins, who interviewed Epstein for the piece, enlisted his friend Whitaker to take photographs. Epstein was impressed with the results and offered Whitaker the position of staff photographer at NEMS.

MAN WHO RUNS THE BEATLES

AFTER one of the biggest welcomes in their careers, the Beatles on their arrival at their Melbourne hotel, were confronted by a hysterical crowd of 20,000 fans.

John, Paul, George and Ringo stood on the balcony, surrounded by security officers, pressmen, radio and television newsmen and the inevitable D.J.s.

Apparently it was one of the latter, himself caught in the mob hysteria, who remarked that the group were greeting their fans “like dictators addressing a mob rally.”

On this cue, the boys swung into an improvised routine and gave mock Nazi salutes.

A photograph of this incident appeared in a Melbourne daily last Monday.

Phone calls, with comments on the incident, have been received at the “Jewish News” and also at the Southern Cross.

I spoke with the Beatles’ Jewish Manager, Brian Epstein, on Monday morning. He is a quietly spoken and urbane man, though does not seem to be unduly sophisticated.

He was mildly shocked and to some degree incredulous that anyone should take the incident to heart.

“It was,’’ he said, “simply an off the cuff joke.”

Epstein, 29, comes of a well to do Liverpool family. He attended “a great number of schools” because he was a “very poor scholar” and at 22 spent a year at the Royal Academy of Dramatic Art. He didn’t think much of that, so left.

“I was interested in a great number of things,” he says, “interior decorating, display, a number of things really.” But finally he went into the family electrical business. And it was there as manager of the radio and records division that he first heard the name of the Beatles.

A girl came in and asked for a record by the group. There wasn’t one but the group itself was appearing a mere hundred yards up the road. That was in August 1961.

WANTED TO GO 

He heard and liked them, though he found them “dead scruffy and untidy”. He set about changing the image. He succeeded and the rest is history.

During our chat, the screams and calls of expectant fans floated up to the 12th floor front window like a piteous sea of diseased sound, rising to a peak of despairing imploration then receding to nothing.

Brian Epstein, in a discreet navy and white check shirt with tasteful monograph over his heart, slender slacks and shoes of soft black Italian leather, spoke on, unheeding, adjusted his tie with perfectly manicured nails.

He had, as I entered, instructed the telephonist to screen calls as “all sorts of people" had been getting through to him, including fans.

“The fans should be obvious," he had said.

Referring to the much published Israeli incident, Epstein said that he had made arrangements for the group to appear there in September this year.

When the announcement that the group would not be allowed to perform there was made, he closed negotiations. The Israeli promotors were aghast.

Epstein wanted to wait till an official retraction of this statement which had not been official, was made. None came and so the group will not appear in Israel, much as he and the boys themselves would like it to.

Though in February of this year he said in America that he had thoughts of bringing the group back to America “in August or September”.

The Beatles are not the only iron in Mr. Epstein’s well controlled fire. At present his “stable’’ includes 8 other pop acts, including Gerry and the Pacemakers.

As one of the Beatles’ most serious critics has pointed out, the vitality of the Mersey sound should dominate the hit charts for quite some time.

Mr. Epstein should then have more big names if, and when, the Beatles fade away.

Brian Epstein, though he now lives most of the time in London, is still a member of the family shule, Greenbank Drive Hebrew Congregation.

His father, Harry, has just joined the Board of Management and, says a proud son, “God willing, he should be President in 8 years’ time.”

[inspiteallthedanger]

“The only one reacting correctly” I’m sorry WHAT? I know Yoko’s disliked but c’mon man…

Well, you know you’re doing something right on the internet when you’re getting told off for both being too nice and not nice enough about someone.

The tag was a joke, but what I meant was George is the only one being truthful about how he felt. What was happening was mental and for whatever reason George was the only one to say it out loud and try and sort it out. Should those feelings have been directed at John as well as Yoko? Probably, and honestly I think they often were. But also, I genuinely don’t think anything that George did in the examples of that post was all that bad. Like, in the grand scheme of things they’re all pretty funny and didn’t really harm Yoko at all.

I would also say that were I George I too might have a problem with someone that:

Got my friend addicted to heroin

Turned up at my place of work uninvited and critiqued my work

Ordered about my friends

Slagged off the work I’d been doing for over a decade to my face

Made my friend cut off ties with me

Obviously John’s a big boy and all of this is also his doing, but I get that it’s very normal to blame the new partner and not your friend for sudden, drastic changes in personality. George was always going to see this as a Yoko problem - as do many of John’s fans, whether it’s true or not.

Like, as I mentioned above, I’ve got flack for being too kind to Yoko. And I actually have an ask waiting that’s about my overall views on her. So you can check back if you’re interested in that.

This is the Beatles we’re talking about, those examples are so tame when it comes to all their bad behaviour - it’s the sort of thing you’d find in a lot of friendship groups and especially the sort where you’re all still acting like you did when you’re teenagers. So, I’m not upset at George for reacting emotionally. Does Yoko deserve hate? Nah, not to the extent she gets it that’s for sure. Does she cover herself in glory a lot of the time? Nah. But. Again. This is the Beatles, and if we’re going to worry about someone overreacting to their biscuits being eaten we probably have our priorities wrong.

[phoneybeatlemania]

Previous anon. I think you're right that I chose the wrong time to jump into the discussion. Because George's relationship with Paul really isn't the main thing I struggle with. George's general jokes about the Beatles (especially when they feel directed at fans), occasionally Ringo, and others also make me feel this way. It's more an overarching thing around how to be funny and kind silmultaniously. But I think you still made a really good point about British humor that is helpful to me. (1/2)

Anon Ask 2:  I'm not English and maybe cultural differences play a bigger in role in my discomfort than I recognized.

Reference to last ask

Hiya again! Thanks for getting back to me on this :)

When it comes to making a more general point about Georges sense of humour (and whether the things he said really were Just Jokes, or if they went any further then that), I think theres an interesting discussion to be had there. And while I think his sardonic and deprecating humour was for the most part harmless (or intended to be harmless), theres times where humour can definitely be used as a malicious tool, so within some contexts I think you could make a solid point. 

The thing about George’s mockery of the group though (which included specific members and fans), is that I think this was a way of dealing with fame for him? Like if I had to deal with That Amount of fame, I can imagine that the only even remotely healthy coping strategy I would have would be to just joke about it a lot; so I guess its just worth keeping in mind that theres only so many ways one can go about dealing with immense fame.

When it comes to like Cultural Boundaries, I obviously wouldn’t know where in the world you’re from anon, but if perhaps you’ve grown up somewhere where humour isn’t generally very sarcastic or dry I could see why some jokes would rub off as insensitive, but ultimately his jokes (about the band, fans, legacy etc.) aren’t ultimately going to be representative of his entire experience with fame, legacy and/or the band. It was just a complicated relationship that Im sure he had with all these things. 

There was something interesting I read in Teatles Fanzine recently, which id like to share because it just brings to mind how much George really struggled with fame:

Beatlemania took a genuine toll on George. In the Anthology he said, “All the time, constantly, I felt frightened by things.” As early as 1963 he was having reservations. Allistair Taylor recalled an incident where George had failed to show up to the airport when The Beatles were meant to be flying to London from Liverpool. Taylor phoned him to find out what was going on, and he responded, “I don’t want to be a Beatle.” This cause Taylor to panic enough to go talk to him in person. He stated, “George didn't like all the pressure and the frenzy of the crowds and the fans.”

—Anxiety and the Quiet Beatle by Rose, The Teatles Anthology

As I said in the beginning of my response, I do think theres room for deeper discussions about Georges jokes, and whether they were harmless or hurtful. I would advise you though to just keep in mind that his experience with fame is something none of us are likely to ever be able to truly understand—so while it can be difficult to comprehend some his actions or choice in words, imo we should try remain somewhat sympathetic to that experience too. And while I wouldn’t personally want to ‘psychoanalyse’ George or anything because I don’t consider my self That Much of an expert, what i’ll say is that separating himself from the myth and the legacy I think in part was just a way of staying sane for him, because at the end of the day, he was just a guy*.

[*I think in particular as well, George just didn’t really have the personality type of someone whose kind of Built to do well under fame. Like the amount of fame they all experienced Im sure would take a toll on anyone, but I think theres certain people who would find it more manageable just because it suits Who They Are better, if that makes sense.]

But I can tell from the way you’re writing anon that like, you’re not necessarily seeking out things to dislike about him or trying to be hyperbolic etc. Like I do get that sometimes things about these men are just Hard to understand, because their lives are just Very Different to any of ours. So I appreciate that, and as I say, its a discussion worth having—I just think its important too to try and understand things from his perspective though. 

[talkfastromance4]

something--calum hood oneshot

erm, hi! I wrote this in one go last night, I couldn’t get it out of my head and I wanted to share it with you all. I hope you like it🥺

(also shortened my taglist because of inactivity of previous tags)

word count: 2.4k+

warnings: casual drinking, smoking of weed, sexual situations and angst.

****

Calum stares at the blades of the fan turning lazily above him, birds are chirping outside, and he brings his joint to his lips. He takes a sharp inhale keeping his eyes steady on the moving blades, a familiar tune rolling through his head from The Beatles. He’s been awake for a few hours, the sharp ache in his head has turned into a dull throb.

His mouth is dry as sandpaper and he should probably chug a gallon of water and eat something.

There’s movement to his left and he glances over as he exhales the smoke. Through the haze he sees her face but when it clears he realizes it isn’t her. It’s another in the place where she should be. The woman next to him sighs in her sleep, his shirt she’s wearing rises and falls with her breath.

Calum sighs and rolls out of bed. He sticks the joint in an ashtray (a gift from her) and pulls on a hoodie. His feet pad on the wooden floor as he sees the cluster of remnants from the night before. He and Roy held a little soiree that turned into a bigger party than they anticipated. He should clean it up but he might just hire a cleaning crew, he knows he’d be the only one doing the cleaning anyway.

There were cups everywhere, empty bottles turned over on the stairs. Some of his closest friends were still asleep on the couches in the living room. He hears Duke’s collar jangle outside, and Calum is transported to the night before in the exact spot where Duke is sniffing by the pool. Calum stood there as well.

He’s chatting with Ryan and Andy when people around them chorus her name. He looks up just as she steps onto the patio, her hand holding onto another man’s. They aren’t in a relationship, her and the guy, just like he’s never in relationships with the women he sees. Relationships have done them both dirty in the past, but he always feels a certain pull to her. Something he can’t shake.

Her eyes meet his over the shoulder of Crystal, something flickers in those pretty eyes and then it’s gone. Calum watches her for a moment longer, the way she smiles and how her laugh meets his ears. Throughout the party they were so close to each other yet so far apart.

People were in between them, but Calum was very aware of her presence, he could sense her. She could sense him, too.

It wasn’t until he was heading upstairs to use the bathroom did he see her escape into his room. Creasing his eyebrows together he follows her. The sounds of the party diminish greatly the further he gets away from it. The closer he gets to her his breath hitches, his heart accelerates.

When he turns the corner his bathroom door opens and she’s there. And he’s there. Both of them standing a mere six feet apart but he can see the beauty mark at the corner of her right eye. A mark he’s always wanted to kiss.

“Cal,” she says in surprise and he loves how his name sounds from her lips. “Sorry, the line to the main bathroom was too long and I know you said I could use it so I—”

“It’s fine, don’t worry about it,” he shakes his head. “Are you enjoying the party?”

“Yeah, yeah it’s…it’s great,” she nods. “Are you liking it?”

“It got better when I saw you walk in,” he confesses. The small amount of alcohol he’s consumed is making him feel bold. He takes a step forward. “Who’s the guy you brought?”

“Max. He works with me.”

“Mixing business with pleasure, yeah?” Calum takes another step forward, but she remains in the doorway of his bathroom.

“Hardly,” she scoffs then narrows her eyes at him. “You’re being very…forward tonight.”

“Can’t help it,” he takes another step and shakes his head. “You make me feel very…unwound.”

“I’m sorry?”

Calum chuckles and takes two more steps forward. He’s so close to her now he can smell her perfume. It makes his head dizzy.

“You really don’t know what you do to me, do you?”

She searches around his room as if she’d find the answer to his question painted on his walls then sighs. “Depends.”

“On?”

“Do you know what you do to me?”

That caught him off guard. He does something to her?

“I didn’t—”

“Really, Calum? Are you that daft? You drive me crazy. Crazy in a way where I need to…need to do something about it later. The way you look at me isn’t how friends look at each other.”

“How do I look at you?”

“The way I look at you I’d imagine,” she sighs.

“Wait…what do you mean you need to do something?” he takes another step. He’s so close now he can see the slight shimmer in her lip gloss.

“Really, Calum?” she nearly whines and hides her face before rubbing her temples. Her eyes meet his. “You really want me to tell you how I go home and think about you in my bed? How I…how I touch myself wishing it were you?”

He’s stunned and his mind is racing a mile a minute. She thinks about him, too? He’s tried to stop his own fantasies forming as he lays in bed thinking of her. Thinking of the sounds she’d make and where her sweet spots are. Calum cups her cheek in his hand tilting her face upward. He cocks his head until her eyes are looking into his.

“Now who’s being forward?”

She lets out a grunt of frustration. “Seriously?! I’m sorry for using your bathroom, I’ll head back downstairs—why are you laughing?”

“It was a joke, sweetheart,” he coos moving even closer to her. He’s so close now he can see the color of her eyeshadow, the glittering shine on her cheeks from her highlighter. “I think about you, too.”

She swallows harshly. “You do?”

He brings his other hand to her other cheek; his hold forces her lips to purse together tempting him even more. Lips he’s always wanted to taste. Lips he’s wanted to nibble on. He takes a leap, flying on this boldness in his bloodstream and leans forward to kiss her.

Her lips are soft and taste of strawberries. He hums tracing her lower lip with his tongue and she opens up to him willingly. Their tongues meet and she gasps softly. He continues to kiss her a bit longer then pulls away, nudging his nose against hers.

“I think about you in a way that would make you blush, sweetheart,” he murmurs, his thumbs stroke the apples of her cheeks.

“Like how?” her voice shakes but her hands are steady as she grabs onto his belt buckle and pulls him forward. Her fingers dip below the waistband of his jeans and he groans at the near contact to a part of him that twitches at her touch.

“You really want to know?” he pecks her lips softly.

“Now you’re suddenly shy?” she teases, and he laughs before kissing her again.

He pauses and pulls back to look at her, laughs again and kisses her once more before pushing her into the bathroom. He kicks the door shut, dropping his hands from her face so he can lift her onto the counter. She pulls him towards her by his belt again, her legs opening to accommodate him between her thighs. Thighs that are more on display because her dress has hiked up.

Calum leans on the countertop, his hands bracing onto the edge as he stares at her.

“You want to know all the dirty thoughts I have of you?” he kisses her twice.

“Mhm…” she hums running her finger on his skin above his belt. He shivers at the touch, silently begging her to move her finger lower. “Talk dirty to me.”

“I think of how I want to make you scream my name because my tongue and lips won’t let up on your pussy,” he starts and it’s her turn to shiver at his words. Calum smirks and presses himself against her. “How I want your thighs wrapped around my head, your fingers in my hair as I take you over the edge again and again. You’re dripping on my mouth and after your eighth orgasm I’ll slide my aching, throbbing, swollen cock inside you.”

She whimpers and Calum can’t help but kiss her again. She arches her body against his, her soft parts touching the hard parts of him and his head spins.

“What do you think of?” he presses against her, lips tumbling over hers.

“You’re pinning my wrists above my head as you fuck me. Your lips all over me while your fingers take me over the edge,” she grinds herself against him and whines. “Please, Cal.”

She removes her hand from his stomach and grabs his wrist, she drags it onto her thigh. His fingers splay on her soft thigh rubbing soft circles on her flesh. Each arch widens and his finger gets closer to her heat, a heat he can already feel.

“You want me to touch you?” he asks knocking his forehead against hers. She nods. “Tell me, sweetheart.”

“Touch me, Cal, please,” she says breathlessly.

He twists his wrist moving his hand under her dress and touches her. His fingers rub against a wet patch and she moans as he drags his nail up her clothed slit. On her second moan he slips his tongue inside her mouth, his finger presses harder. They’re making out when he pushes aside the fabric and feels her arousal coat his fingers.

“Fuck, you’re so wet, baby,” he groans stroking her up and down. Her body jerks at the tease and his words. He moves his lips to her jaw as he inserts a finger slowly. She’s warm and slick and his cock twitches when he thinks of being inside her completely.

She hums when he starts pumping in and out of her slowly. Her body reacts to his motions, her breath shortening in his ear as he sucks on her neck. Soon, he picks up the pace and she starts to rock with his movements.

“Ride my fingers, baby,” he encourages, and she moves faster when he slips in another finger. “Just like that…”

He feels her clench around him, and she wraps her arms around his shoulders, her lips connecting to his neck. He thrusts in her faster, his arm straining but she’s so close and he’d be damned if he didn’t finish her off. His bicep is tightening when she is, her breath hot on his skin then she bites down hard but Calum loves it.

He continues to pump in and out of her as she comes around him. It’s so much sweeter than his fantasy. When her body relaxes, Calum drags her face from his neck so he can kiss her, his fingers still moving lazily in and out of her. She whimpers when he pulls them out completely.

He brings his hand between them, keeping his eyes on hers he takes them in his mouth to suck her juices off him. She wraps her hand around his and pulls one of his fingers into her own mouth. Their eyes are locked as they both suck her orgasm off his fingers. The whole ordeal is so hot he can’t stand it, so he removes his fingers from their mouths and gives her a sloppy kiss.

Calum rubs at his neck; his tension and anger have taken root there because he wishes he was back in his bathroom with her in front of him. With her legs wrapped around him and her moans in his ear. Something broke their bubble of ecstasy and he had to take care of some problem downstairs that Mitchy drunkenly shouted through the door.

But he promised her they’d continue this after the party.

The universe decided to place him on the unlucky side of the coin though. When he returned to the party downstairs people were freaking out because a couple of people hopped the gate and were somewhere on his property. The cops were already called, and he had to make sure whoever they were didn’t wander somewhere they really shouldn’t be. Like upstairs where she was.

For the rest of the evening, he had to speak with the cops on his front step, his irritation at the party crashers intensifying because they took him away from her. When the cops finally left with the trespassers in the back of their car, Calum headed inside on a mission to find her.

He was stopped for shots and a pass of a joint and a pipe. His head started to swim even deeper but at the forefront was still her. He finally found her by the fireplace, that Max guy talking to her with wild arm motions. Calum made a very lopsided beeline towards her then was stopped by Missy.

Missy decided to stop him by shoving her tongue down his throat and alarms went off in his head. She didn’t taste like strawberries. Her perfume was too strong it burned his nose. When he finally managed to push her away from him, Y/N’s eyes were full of hurt and shame as she watched the whole thing.

“No, Y/N—”

She pulled Max to her, lips locked on his and Calum felt like he got hit by a truck.

What happened next was a blur. Faces and voices and bodies morphed together. Calum’s head hurt. Missy felt sick so he took her upstairs where she retched in the toilet then passed out on his tile. Calum offered her his clothes to sleep in and she curled up in his bed.

He went downstairs to find Y/N, to explain that Missy was just drunk, and it didn’t mean anything. It didn’t mean what happened between them in his bathroom, it didn’t come close. But he discovered she left with Max and his heart fell into his stomach.

And now here he is, surveying the aftermath of what could have been the best night of his life with her. But something always got in the way and this time, she saw it with her own eyes.

The melody from upstairs is back in his head and he finds the words that suddenly make sense in this stupid situation of bad timing.

“Something in the way she moves…. something in the way she woos me,” he sings quietly in the silent house. He’s missing a few words, but these are what’s floating in his head. “Something in the way she knows…and all I have to do is think of her—”

“Calum?”

Taglist: @calpalirwin @myloverboyash  @loveroflrh @iovehemmings @cxddlyash @princesslrh  @spicycal @mysticalhood @notinthesameguey @wastedheartcth  @itjustkindahappenedreally @calumance @thew0rldneedsmcreycghurt  @sarcastically-defensive17 @another-lonely-heart @devilatmydoor @sanrioluke @mayve-hems  @haikucal @thatscooibaby  @suchalonelysunflower @burstintocolor  @dead-and-golden @mymindwide  @blackbutterfliescal @redrattlers @karajaynetoday @quasighost @i-like-5sos @creampiecashton @calpops @superbloomed-c @littledrummeraussie

[hwrryscherry]

The one where Y/N is a princess.

characters: HARRYxPRINCESSY/N

blurb: Y/N is the youngest daughter of Prince Charles and Princess Diana which makes herself the youngest sister of William and Harry(the duke of Sussex). Harry(Styles) and she meet at the Dunkirk premiere when Y/N attended with her brother Harry. This time, Harry(Styles) is in London and show Princess Y/N what it feels like to be just a girl called ‘’Y/N’’ for a day.

word count: 2.4K

warnings: fluff, a little sad in the end.

author’s note: I received a request about Y/N being a heiress and my mind just go directly to royalty so I guess this could be cool? I tried lol. If you’re british and you felt ofended by any way while reading this I’m extremely sorry!!!! I hope you guys like it as much as I do. And also, I just wanted to share that I wrote this listening to ‘’Ophelia’’ by The Lumineers and ‘’The Book of You & I’’ by Alec Benjamin. 

    You and Harry scheduled to meet in the British Museum situated in the Bloomsbury area of London even though it was a public space, it wouldn’t be a surprise as people already knew that you and harry new each other. You both met on the Dunkirk premiere which you attended together with your brother Harry. Harry(Styles) was such a gentleman, he actually were nervous. As a British man he respects the royal family as much possibler than he can, and he would never want to make neither you nor your brother to feel uncomfortable.

    But anyway, you both scheduled there because Harry had been in England for a while and as you stayed friends it just felt right to meet up. You actually felt really tired, emotionally tired. You were so used to traveling the most amazing places with friends and now being basically locked up at The Buckingham Palace because of the corona virus felt draining for you. So when Harry came up with the meeting you were so glad to finally be leaving home, and Harry has always been the type of person who you felt like you could talk openly and be exactly who you want to be, and we don’t even have to say that the British museum it’s probably one of your favorite places in London. You were enamored by art, and there were so many interesting things in there and every time you’ll go there you’d find something new.

  It was 9am and the museum it’s actually closed now but you did have some perks. You were in the Egyptian part accompanied by your bodyguard Jasper, when you suddenly listened the rough voice of you dearly friend coming closer to you making you turn yourself to look at him getting closer. He greeted you with a simple hug in which you reciprocated by opening a slight smile looking at him.

— Hello, darling — Harry said while using his hands to style his short and messy hair with a smile on his face. — How are you?

— Hi, I’ve been good, just tired! But what about you? — You asked as you both started to walk through the beautiful masterpieces — How’s your mom and Gemma? — You had that really strong British accent, which Harry understood completly, and he really likes it. He thinks it’s the cutest thing. Actually, Harry thought everything about you were extremely cute, you both have a little crush on each other but as you already told him a lot of times before, just the thought of how many things he’d have to leave for because of the royal regulation made you sad for him. You’d never ask him for something like that.

— They’re good but... — Harry stopped walking looking fixedly to your face trying to analyze your emotions by their expressions — Why are you tired? I mean, I understand it must be really bad living in a castle but anyway, what happened? — Harry said smirking at you and your reaction of laughing and rolling your eyes at him.

— Haha, really funny! You should be a humorist — You answered mocking a bit and running your right hand through your hair as you started walking again — And I asked you how were you, you won’t answer? I’ll lock you in the dungeon for your audacity! — You both always joked like this because when you first started being friends, Harry had all that idea about the old royalty with dungeons and prisoners so you’d always make fun of him for that.

— Alright, alright! I'm good, they're good, we're all good. Now, tell me! — Harry said putting his right hand slightly on your shoulder making you stop walking and look at him with all your attention. You sighed trying to form your words to explain exactly what you were feeling to him.

— I don't know, I'm just... I'm so tired of the routine, you know? I wish I could just go out to do the craziest things and not be recognized. — You were looking straight to Harry's green eyes, it felt like they were watching your soul because e was giving you his full atention. The boy really did care about you. He stayes quiet for a while in complete silence, it was a comfortable silence though. It never felt like you and Harry needed to talk all the time when you got together because it was nice just to stay together and enjoy each other's company.

— Let me take you out! — Harry suddenly said after a few seconds making your eyes widen up as you looked at him.

— Excuse me? — You asked.

— Let me take you out! We can put on some disguises and take the best London tour we can find, I bet you've never done it! — Harry said with a little smirk in the end. He was right, you never took a tour through your own city which seems crazy — You know... I really like you and if you wanna have fun this could be great! You'll be just a girl called Y/N and I'll be just a boy called Harry. — He said trying to argue with your thoughts thinking if this would actually be a good thing to do. But you didn't really have anything to lose, did you? — So, do you wanna do a bunch of fun things with me today? — Harry held out his right hand to you indicating that as soon as you shake his hand you would leave that museum and probably have the best day of your life, and so you did.

So as soon as you could, you both were out of that museum with the most ridiculous disguises, if I might say. Harry changed his fashionable clothes for some neutral grey hoodie and you changed your cute black dress to a jeans and hoodie as well. Your heart raced a bit when you both left that museum, the fear of being recognized was in you. It's not that you don't love the people of this nation, it's just... a day off could fit you pretty well.

It was hard to convince Jasper to leave you both alone though, it was his job to keep you safe and actually you don't even remember the last time you left your home without him, you just needed freedom for a while but you did convince him. He spent some minutes actually talking to Harry tons of rules about keeping both of you safe and how he couldn't risk your life and all that stuffs.

For the first time in your life, you were on those big, red and popular British bus. You and Harry entered by the back door and within minutes, you both were on the upon side of it on the last chairs. You looked through the window admiring this city and thinking about how much you would never want to live anywhere else. Harry was making a lot of dad jokes beside you though. You tried to laugh as lowly as you could but it was almost impossible, come on “What's the name of a man with a rubber toe? Roberto” it's so bad that it turns out to be funny. But anyway, the bus took both of us to King Cross where you entered a very popular fast-food place called “Five Guys” as Harry guaranteed you was the best he'd ever had and even though you'd doubted it so much, you agreed to go with him. When you were there, you ordered the biggest burger it had on the menu, which actually surprised Harry, but he surprised it too as he ordered it on the name of “Archie and Eleanor” so you could maintain your disguise.

— So.. Archie and Eleanor? — You asked smirking when you finally took the first bite of your burger. It was delicious but Harry was definitely lying, this is not the best one ever, but yep, all for the experience.

— Come on, you loved it! It's very charming, don't you think? — Harry asked as he took a sip of his coca-cola. It's crazy how these stupid disguises was working, is it really that impossible to recognize someone with a hoodie, cap and sunglasses? You didn't want to know because you were having a nice time.

— You know what, I think we need to get those Chinese cookies because I wanna read my luck! — You commented making him shook his head in reaction to your ask.

— Ok so we need to dinner Chinese food so bad! — You argued taking Harry from surprise as he didn't thought you'd stay this late with him.

— You'd have to buy actual Chinese food, you can't just buy the cookie! — He answered raising his eyebrows at you taking his last bite of his burger.

It didn't take much long for you both to be moving again. It was definitely the best day you've had in a while. You both went to Kensigton High Street and bought the most stupid UK theme hats. Harry bought a fake glasses too; it was blue and had a UK flag handed on it making you laugh every time you looked at his face.

— Come on, I still look cute! — He said putting his hands on his hips and posing like a model, on the middle of the street.

— If you say so!

Next you both went all your way up to Abbey Road which is the famous street from The Beatles photo, and you and Harry as the great fans you are had to copy them. You asked to a random person to take a photo of you two with the best American accent you could impersonate to her. The photo looked so cool and a car almost hit you two but you were fine and for some reason you both laughed and ran to the woman with your phone.

— Oh, to be drunk in love! You both are a really cute couple. — The old lady said giving your phone back to you and walked away before any of you could contest her. You both looked at each other and Harry smirked at you.

— Oh, we're such a cute couple! — Harry said blinking his eyes on a very cute way and you just rolled your eyes at him and started walking again.

— Come on, Styles! I wanna go to the Queen's Gallery — You said walking your way up to the bus stop. Harry had a big smile on his face, he didn't remember the last time he actually had that much fun. He loved England. He loved those places and he loved having this much fun with you.

In the Queen's Gallery, you and Harry tried to not make that much of a noise, it was a museum right? But it felt hard to keep it quiet because you both were taking the weirdest and funniest photos with the arts in there, for a moment you even thought you both were going to be expulsed of the location, but you didn't. None of you realized how much the time was flying and it was probably 3 pm now.

The next step was the Columbia Road Flower Market. It was probably the coolest thing of your day. You both ran around taking a lot of photos and videos. You bought one of the most delicious breads in there. You were looking at some flowers when Harry came back to you with a bunch of pink tulips on his hand, it was your favorite flowers and he knew it.

You both went to so many places actually; you went to HMS Belfast, Battersea Park, Albert Memorial, Old Spiralfields Market, Serpentine Lake, Carnaby Street and Holland Park.

When it was closer to the sunset, you went to Princess Diana Memorial Garden. It was a hard place for you. It has always been and Harry even asked if you really wanted to go there, but you did. You needed to sit down for a moment on your life and miss your mom. You were little when she died so you're probably the only one of your brothers that remember her the least.

You both lied down on the grass. It had a fresh breeze in the air, but the sun was still out, it was that golden hour moment. You rested your head on Harry's thorax looking up to the sunset orange sky above you.

— You know this can be great... If we're willing to try! — Harry said in a very low tone. He was caressing your hair with his hand analysing your face, so he could get any reaction for you.

— It would be for a while. — You said sitting up to look at his face, your faces were a few inches apart, the golden coloration on his face giving him the glow he did have naturally — But what would happen 3 years from now when someone tells you that you couldn't perform anymore? Or you couldn't release your songs? It's not right, I can't ask you this! — Harry looked away for a moment, probably trying to contain his emotions and think, just think — But we have today, we have now. Maybe we should just enjoy what we have now!

He looked back at you, directly into your eyes and again, comfortable silence. The comfortable silence Harry thought was so overrated felt right any time he was with you. He put himself closer to you if that even it's possible. His ring handed touched your cheek, eyes never distracting, you leaned in and your lips touched his. It felt magical, it felt quiet and it felt right.

The sun was out now, bringing the night and the sky full of stars. You both were by The Mall avenue, running, and dancing to the song playing backwards; it was Ophelia by the Lumineers, after that day, this song was your song and any time any of you listened to it, each other was brought up to your minds. You called it a night when you both were by the top of the London Eye, where all the big lights inspired you. When the cold breeze hit your hair and the height scared you but Harry made you feel safe.

Harry dropped you off at the castle's gate at midnight, just as he promised. You stayed by the balcony of your room until the sunrise looking at the sky because you knew that Harry was on the other side looking at the sky too thinking about how you'd never get to finish the book of you and him, and if you weren't faded to end together at least you had today.

[path-of-my-childhood]

Taylor Swift: Pop Star of the Year

By: Jonathan Dean for The Sunday Times Date: December 27th 2020

Rather than hunker down, the singer put out two albums in 2020 and won over new audiences. She’s the pop star of the year.

Taylor Swift met Paul McCartney in the autumn for a big interview in Rolling Stone. The two would have headlined Glastonbury this summer. Who knows if they will do that next year. Anyway, both recorded albums in lockdown, working from home like the rest of us. When they spoke, though, Swift had a secret. As well as Folklore, released in July, she had a follow-up record in the pipeline — Evermore, which was released this month.

Swift noted that the former Beatle was still so full of joy. “Well, we’re just so lucky, aren’t we?” he said. “We’re really lucky,” Swift replied. “I can’t believe it’s my job.” And she is right. Being a pop star is an extraordinary way to earn the living she does. But rather than accepting luxury and letting this tough year tumble on, Swift is also keenly aware what music means. Sad songs soothe, happy songs make us dance, but as fans of most artists waited for something — anything — this year, this 31-year-old released two albums that broke chart records, were critically adored and introduced her to people who once thought that she wasn’t for them.

“I’m so exhausted!” she said to the American chat show host Jimmy Kimmel, laughing, a few weeks ago, when asked if she had a third new album planned. “I have nothing left.” In addition to Folklore and Evermore, she filmed a TV special and even started rerecording her back catalogue, after a volatile dispute over who owns her work. By October I’d just about cobbled together my first sourdough loaf.

A decade ago Swift moved firmly into the limelight thanks to a squabble with Kanye West entirely of the rapper’s own making. In 2009, when Swift — then a nascent country music star — won the best female video award at the VMAs, West stormed on stage, grabbed her microphone and said that Beyoncé should have won. Swift was 19 — West was 32 — and she looked scared. This wasn’t just about her biggest moment yet being stolen, but also about her position in the pop hierarchy being questioned, very publicly, from the off. She stood there as that man bullied her. Apparently she left the stage in tears.

Years later West released Famous, with its infamous lyric “I feel like me and Taylor might still have sex/ Why? I made that bitch famous.” The alt-folk singer Father John Misty also wrote about sleeping with her. Every time that sort of thing happened, a powerful man in Swift’s industry was reducing a successful, talented, younger female to the level of a sex object. It was back-in-your-box belittling — as it was when a TV host groped her. (She successfully sued him.) While Swift herself would retort to West, as her music became less country, more slick pop, such retorts felt forced and gave the rapper too much of her oxygen. A nod to him on Folklore comes with the “Clowns to the West” line, but it is a sideshow now, not a headline.

Not that Swift’s life is entirely her own. She’s been one of the world’s bestselling female artists for a decade, coupled with curiosities such as a well-orchestrated relationship with Tom Hiddleston that kept her in the spotlight. Like many twentysomethings, Swift spent her youth apolitically, only to receive flak for staying silent during the 2016 US election. This year she endorsed Joe Biden, but what if she had wanted to stay quiet? Would the media have let her? She is under so much scrutiny that, after she made an innocuous hand gesture in a recent TV interview, similar to one women make to draw attention to domestic abuse, this headline ran: “Some people think Taylor Swift is secretly asking for help in her latest interview.”

Like many at the start of the pandemic she felt listless. The world we were used to was a wasteland, and we could only find the energy to watch Normal People. Swift’s ennui, though, was, well, swift. Stuck in LA, she emailed Aaron Dessner of the beloved beardy indie band the National to see if he fancied writing with her. No fool, Dessner said yes and, mere weeks later, the duo — with help from Swift’s regular collaborator Jack Antonoff as well as Justin Vernon, from the beloved beardy indie band Bon Iver — released Folklore. The gang just carried on working and, five months later, gave us Evermore.

Creativity is not on tap. Indeed, this year is not one for judging what others may or not have achieved. However, the silence of many big pop stars is striking because they know that even a single would make someone’s day; distract for a while.

Everyone needed to adjust to working from home, but Swift was one of the only musicians who did and, by eschewing the arena pop of recent albums for something more subdued, organic and folky, she gave the sense that she was letting fans in more than ever. She was at home, like us. This is who she is, and the first single from these sessions was so cosy, it was even called Cardigan.

“I just thought, ‘There are no rules any more,’” she told McCartney. “Because I used to put all these parameters on myself, like, ‘How will this song sound in a stadium?’ If you take away the parameters, what do you make? I guess Folklore.”

Maybe it is tedious, for a deft writer with a career of varied, brilliant songs — Love Story, I Knew You Were Trouble, Blank Space — to find respect from some people only when artists who appeal to middle-aged men start to work with her. On the other hand, pop has never been particularly welcoming to many until it sounds like something you are used to and, with delicate acoustics and gossamer-like piano, Swift’s two new albums recall, sonically, Nick Drake or Kate Bush. Thematically, lyrics seem to come from anywhere. Daphne du Maurier, for one. Even the Lake District and its poets.

Some songs are personal. She is dating British actor Joe Alwyn, and on one track she sings, “I want to give you a child.” Make of that what you will. But these records’ highlights are not about herself, but others. “There was a point,” she told Zane Lowe on Apple Music, “that I had got to as a writer, [where I was only writing] diaristic songs. That felt unsustainable.” Instead, she does what the best writers do and mixes subjective with objective. The Last American Dynasty is a terrific piece of writing about the socialite Rebekah Harkness, who lived in a Rhode Island house that Swift bought and was, by all accounts, a bit scandalous. Swift tells her story almost with envy. Imagine, she seems to say, that freedom.

“In my anxieties,” she said in Rolling Stone, “I can often control how I am as a person and how normal I act. But I cannot control if there are 20 photographers outside in the bushes and if they follow our car and interrupt our lives.”

Then there is Epiphany. The first verse is about her grandfather, who fought in the Second World War; the second about frontline workers in hospitals now. Sung in a high register, it is suitably choral. Marjorie, on Evermore, is even better. It is about her grandmother, an opera singer who died in 2003. “What died didn’t stay dead” is the repeated line, and it is eerie, gorgeous. Swift sings how she thinks Marjorie is singing to her, at which point some vocals from the latter’s recordings waft in. Touching, but the real power is in Swift writing about vague memories of a relative who died when she was young. “I complained the whole way there,” she sings. “I should’ve asked you questions.”

In person she is warm like this, and funny. When Kimmel told her there were far more swearwords on Folklore and Evermore than previous records, she replied: “It’s just been that kind of year.” She is also odder than people realise. In the way pop stars should be. Obsessed by numerology, she wrote, on the eve of her birthday when announcing Evermore: “Ever since I was 13, I’ve been excited about turning 31 because it’s my lucky number backwards.” When I turned 31 I just wished to be 13 again, with all that youth, but then, maybe, she is just joking. “Yes, so until I turn 113 or 131, this will be the highlight of my life,” she said. “The numerology thing? I sort of force it to happen.”

Swift, of course, is far from the first pop star to become public property, or have a close bond with fans. This year, however, she was one of the few to show that such adoration is not one-way. She is, simply, a fan of her fans — from planting secrets in her artwork and lyrics, to recording two albums of new music as a balm for them when real life became too deafening.

“One good thing about music,” sang Bob Marley. “When it hits you, you feel no pain.” The 80.6 million who streamed Folklore on its first day will attest to that idea. So will the four million who bought it. Swift is pop star of the year, no doubt — leaving her peers in her wake, on their sofas, rewatching The Sopranos.