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yelenaslyubov · 8 months ago

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A New Frontier: Part 1

𓃗𐚁🏜𖤓⋆｡° ✮ // a new frontier // part 1 // part 2 // part 3

main masterlist || yelena belova || requests

a/n: welcome to the first part of my first series! like i said in my announcement, i’m not sure how many parts this series will have, but as i see it now, definitely over 6 so get excited about that!! this first part is definitely a build up to everything will be contained going further, so there’s not much adventuring in this one. i hope you enjoy!

ˏˋ°•*⁀➷ pairing: yelena belova x reader

ˏˋ°•*⁀➷ warnings: language

ˏˋ°•*⁀➷ description: you’re granted the opportunity to join the avengers on your first top secret mission together. not only are you navigating your newfound status as an avenger, but you’re also trying to hide your affection for another avenger, yelena. you travel to your location in stealth and soon find out what kind of mess you’ve really gotten into.

ˏˋ°•*⁀➷ word count: 3.2k

Your eyes jolted open when you realized you had fallen asleep accidentally.

“…and we need to act fast in order to make sure we do our part in this mess. And remember, none of you jackasses better make a peep about this, I mean it.”

Shit.

You had fallen asleep during the majority of Tony’s mission announcement. This was the first stakeout call that you had been invited on since you had been recruited. Most jobs were simple and thorough—fighting and taking down a villain and so on. Everything was usually the same, except this time and you missed it.

“Alright, that’s all I got. Be ready and down to the pad in an hour.” Tony dismissed everyone from the room when they all dispersed and you were left disoriented from the meeting.

“AH, I’m so excited!” you heard Kamala squeal. You assumed she had been asked out on the mission as well, making this her first too. “I’ve never seen a horse in person before!”

Now you were even more confused as to what was happening. You decided to be surprised rather than ask too many questions, especially since you were new. You couldn’t be caught slacking on the job already.

You went up to your room to pack whatever you could with the little information you had. You remembered something being said in between your slumber about it being dry and hot, so you kept that in mind.

You packed all the toiletries you had since you did not know when you would return. You didn’t have a permanent suit currently, as it was still being worked on and you didn’t know when it was going to be done. You hoped you could finally break into it on this trip so you wouldn’t have to use one of the hand-me-downs.

You jumped as you heard a knock at your door. “Can I come in?” Kate shouted through the door. Even before you could speak Kate had opened the door and was on a mission.

“Do you have deodorant or a hairbrush? I-I must have lost mine or run out because I don’t know where they went.”

Kate was the first friend you had made since you had been recruited. You both hit it off immediately and she made the transition from normal life to super life much easier.

“How does one not know when they run out of deodorant?” you chuckled.

“I honestly don’t know. I think I kinda just slap it on without looking while I’m halfway out the door,” she stammered.

“Well in that case, yes, I have both deodorant and a hairbrush so you lucked out today.”

“Ugh, thank you, you’re a lifesaver,” Kate sighed. “Oh, by the way! If you’re all good with it I think Kamala was going to bunk with me and it’s three to a room so you wanna join?”

“Uhm, that sounds good,” you responded. You were nervous to be in such close proximity to so many new people, but you were excited to be involved in something this secretive.

“Awesome! Well, I’ll see you down there then.” Kate smiled and then ran out of the room in the same manner she came. It was then you realized you missed your chance to ask her what exactly you all were doing and what you should bring. It added even more mystery.

You had filled your duffel bag to the brim with anything you could think of—a couple books, clothes for all weather conditions, a swimsuit, a coat, etc. You had said goodbye to your room for the time being when you ran into another Avenger in the hallway.

“Oh, uhm hey.” You were face to face with a green-eyed woman looking slightly up at you. “I’m sorry, I wasn’t watching where I was going.”

“It’s good,” the woman smiled and shrugged. She walked off without saying a word and you felt an uncomfortable aura blooming.

The butterflies in your stomach slowed their flutter the farther away the woman went. You had learned in your first few days as an Avenger that her name was Yelena. She had short blonde hair and the most captivating eyes you had ever seen. She was nothing short of intimidating so you had exchanged little words between the two of you. This was most inconvenient for you because you were tired of her staring at you as if you were a bit helpless.

You hoped this trip proved otherwise.

You were still awkwardly standing in the hallway after your encounter with Yelena when Kamala came out of her room with what looked like all her belongings balances in her arms. You could make out her eyes peeking between different objects that looked like a fan and a small table.

“I hope I packed enough,” she said through muffled words. “I don’t know how long we’ll be gone.”

“I don’t think you’ll have any problem with that,” you laughed. You watched her carefully walk down the stairs with the rest of her things.

Based on everyone’s timely exit, you assumed that you should probably make your way down to load up. When you made your way down to the pad where everyone else was waiting. Everyone’s packs varied in size so you had no idea how your packing job compared to anyone else’s.

Wanda and Nat had a decent sized suitcase for the both of them to share and others had small duffel bags. You giggled a little to yourself when you saw Peter’s only bag which appeared to be his school bag.

“How did you manage to fit everything in there, Pete?” you asked him.

“Oh uhm all I really need is a few clothes, but the rest is homework.”

“You’re bringing homework on an Avenger’s top secret mission?”

“Uh… yes?”

“That sounds like a sad life, Peter Parker.” You looked to your right where Yelena was standing. “Do you do anything for your own pleasure… like ever?”

You, Yelena, and Peter all stood together staring at one another, waiting for someone to say anything.

“Alright!” Tony yelled. “It’s time to load up.”

Everyone made their way onto their biggest quinjet they had and found their seats. You sat towards the back of the jet as you filed in behind Yelena. Conveniently, you sat directly behind her so you had the perfect view for the duration of the flight. Kamala sat down next to you with her stuffed giraffe in hand.

You heard the echo of the seat buckles clanking together as everyone took their place. You then watched as Yelena twisted her hair up high and put it in a bun. You were mesmerized by the way her blonde highlights caught the glimmer of light shining through the small windows.

Kate looked back at you at the wrong moment because she caught you staring at Yelena. She smirked and winked, signaling that she planned on keeping your secret. Your face was flush with embarrassment. You had not planned to let anyone in on your little crush but there was no going back now. All you had to do was prevent Yelena from finding out.

Tony hopped on last and shut the large door behind him. “As much as I wish I was joining you on this part of the excursion, I’m going to be residing on a small base right outside of the airport we’ll be flying into. I’m working on tracking air transportation as well as focusing on the technical aspects of the issue. I will be checking in regularly.

“As much as I would love to fly everywhere, we have to be more careful.” You looked around at the others to see if they had any clue to what he was talking about. “Once we arrive at the airport, you’ll be assigned vehicles that you must transport in. Using jets gets too risky with the high volume of dust and dirt. You would be noticed too easily that way, so it’s much easier to fit in with the rest of the crowd. Another form of transformation will be provided… promptly.”

Tony sat down in the controller seat without another word, leaving only you at a loss of what could be coming.

You stared at the back of Yelena once again before falling asleep to the sound of her voice and buttons pushing from inside the jet

You jolted awake at the sound of the large compartment door opening. It was abnormally bright and dust seemed to be swarming into the jet. You looked to your right to see Kamala passed out as well.

You stood up to stretch and grab your things, but you were distracted by the look on Yelena’s face as she stared at Kamala. She then turned to you and you were not sure what to do. Yelena looked as if she was trying not to laugh.

“You’ve got something about there…” Yelena gestured around the side of your mouth where you found dried drool from your peaceful sleep.

You frantically wiped it off the best you could and tried to shake the feeling of embarrassment that washed over you. “Oh, I’m sorry, thank you,” you nervously responded.

You proceeded to wipe everything off your face shamefully. You gave Kamala a small tap on the side of her arms in hopes to wake her up. She jolted awake as if she had been screamed at.

“What happened?” she said, groggily.

“You fell asleep…and it looks like we’re here,” you responded. You gathered your things and joined everyone at the front of the quinjet.

“Listen up!” Tony yelled. “This is where I leave you. You’ll be self-escorted from here to the designated vehicles that are waiting outside. I have implemented state of the art trackers and GPS in each of the vehicles. Try to use these vehicles as much as possible. When the time comes, by all means, do whatever is necessary to complete said task, but please, for the love of God, stay hidden. We do not need to be compromised and if I hear about any of you messing around…I will personally handle the situation, and you don’t want that.”

You looked back and forth from Kate to Kamala. You could tell Tony was being serious, which meant this mission was a whole lot harder than you led on in your mind.

As you all unloaded off of the jet the sun pierced through the door making you cover your eyes. Once your eyes adjusted to the brightness, you were met with the vast ground of red clay and trees in the distance. There was not a house or town in sight meaning you were far away from civilization.

“This is my worst nightmare,” Yelena whispered to Natasha.

“No kidding. I can already feel my skin sweltering,” she responded.

Your face recoiled when you saw the rides that were provided to each of you. “They’re joking right?”

“I wish,” Bucky said as he walked by you.

“Ain’t she a beaut, Cap?” Sam said while rubbing his hand back and forth down the side of the truck.

Before you were four rusty, beat-up pickup trucks that were supposed to be your rides for the time being. You weren’t even sure how long they were going to last. They were most definitely older than you.

“Are we sure these are safe to drive…or ride in?” Yelena questioned.

“They’re top of the line, I assure you,” Steve said.

“Maybe when you were born,” she mumbled.

You laughed at her comment and Yelena turned around to look at you and she smirked. Your face couldn’t help but turn a deep shade of pink, but you hoped the heat would disguise your blushing.

“Alright, let’s hit the road. We’re burning daylight here and it’s a two hour drive,” Steve informed everyone which earned a groan from each of them.

Steve, Sam, Bucky, Clint, and Peter took one of the trucks and planned on leading the way to the house. The rest of you assumed you could fit in one truck but there were two left and needed to utilize them both. One truck could seat five and the other could seat three; there were six of you left and you each knew you couldn’t leave someone behind by themselves.

“Race ya!” Kamala yelled. Nat, Wanda, Kate, and Kamala began to run to the five seater truck, while you and Yelena stayed behind. I guess you both assumed that it wasn’t worth fighting over.

You were hesitant to say anything at first but you were curious. “Why didn’t you go with them?”

Yelena shrugged. “My sister and Wanda can get gross when they’re together so I would rather be 100 feet away. But I hope you know I’m driving.”

You nodded in agreement, not wanting to go against her wishes. How could you say no?

You and Yelena put your belongings in the trunk of the car and shut it nice and tight so there was no way it could fly out and escape. Yelena climbed in the driver's seat while you sat next to her in the passenger's seat. The truck started with a sputter and music started blasting through the radio. Tony Keith’s voice rang out, causing you to plug your eyes.

“If this is what the trip has in store,” you gestured to the nature outside and then to the radio, “it’s going to be a long trip.”

“I think my ears are bleeding,” Yelena groaned.

“How about I do this.” You made the executive decision to turn the music completely off. “Better?”

“Much.” Yelena was satisfied with your choice. She followed the kicked up dust trail that led to the truck in front of them. They were farther ahead but you both hoped you hadn’t lost them.

In the meantime, you decided to look around the truck to see what all treasures were held inside. Just by looking at it, it didn’t seem to be anything special. The dash was covered in dirt and dust and old, empty bullet shells rested on top. There were no cup holders for drinks, only a bench seat that could fit another person. You found yourself wondering what would happen if you scooted just a bit closer. You brushed off the thought and continued your scavenger hunt.

There was no backseat, only a small gap that could fit a slender bag. There was a tacklebox that slipped under your seat, so you decided to dig through it. You gasped as you opened it to reveal a pistol made out of vibranium. You could spot it from anywhere.

“Woah!” you admired it. You shifted the small pistol in your hand, observing the craftsmanship.

“Oh shit,” Yelena said. Her eyebrows were raised, telling you she was just as impressed.

“They really did the most.” You took another look at it before you put it back where it belonged and slid it back under the seat. “What we’re to happen if we were stopped somehow and we had that in the car? Wouldn’t they do the math?”

“Look at this thing,” Yelena said plainly.

You looked around at the crusted steering wheel, the patchy seats, and the dirty covered floor. “I suppose you’re right.”

Yelena sighed and continued driving.

You watched the world go by as the clay mesa crowded your vision. It was beautiful in its own way and it was nothing like you had ever seen. The plateau of rock and the arches that presented themselves high off the ground. You may even learn to love it.

You then turned your attention to the driver. Yelena did not go anywhere in public without dressing her best. She was wearing wide cut jeans, a cropped shirt, and high leather boots. The dedication impressed you, especially in this weather. Your eyes wandered from her clothes to her skin and how her olive tone was tanned from the sun. Her eyes twinkled with the reflection of the endless blue sky and you found yourself drowning. Of course until Yelena looked over at you because you had been in a daze for too long.

You turned your attention back out the window with the hope that she wasn’t paying attention to your admiration. The more you stared out the window, the heavier your eyelids were. Eventually, you found yourself drifting to sleep once again with dreams of twinkling green eyes.

You felt a push on your left shoulder but you didn’t move.

There was another push this time, but much harder, causing you to sit all the way up. To your surprise, it was night. You rubbed your eyes and looked to your left to find that Yelena was staring at you.

“Did you know that you snore?” she said outright. Yelena unbuckled and got out of the truck, leaving you stunned all alone.You decided that it would be better not to respond because you wish you could forget it ever happened.

As you slid out of the truck, you looked up at the stars. You had never seen the sky so clear in your life. It was like lightning bugs had hung themselves way up high for everyone to see. You were so distracted by the sky that you didn’t notice where you were.

When you snapped yourself out of your trance you looked around. You were now surrounded by some species of pine tree you couldn’t recall with scarce grass. You were most certainly still in the desert but had traveled farther in the new direction.

In addition, you seemed to be up on a cliff. You looked around once more and there was no sign of a house, let alone anyone else.

“Uh, Yelena,” you questioned. “Where are we?”

Yelena was crouched down ahead of you looking down from the earth when she shushed you. You tried not to take too much offense. You walked to where she was in hopes of figuring out what was going on.

“Yelena, I said, where are-” Yelena covered your mouth quickly. You wanted to resist but all you could do was yell silently into the palm of her hand.

“Be quiet,” Yelena whispered, then held up a finger to her lips as she uncovered her hand from your mouth.

You huffed. “I just want to know what we’re doing out here? Where is everyone?”

“I took a little detour,” she admitted. “I just wanted to scope out the competition and Tony had already wired the GPS with significant locations so I knew where to go.”

“He should’ve known better,” you shook your head. You were already in this mess with her so you might as well finish it.

You focused your eyes to where she was looking to find a small sized building. It was nothing like you pictured it would be in your head. There was a flagpole outside the fence gates with an American flag on it accompanied by another flag that you could not make out. You squinted harder to see what picture was made out on the fabric.

“Is that…” You could spot the unique design of a skull with its six arms recoiled under.

It was Hydra.

i hope you enjoyed!

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ruershrimo · 2 months ago

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take me back (take me with you) | f. megumi x fem! reader | chapter 9: you'll hate me

ao3 link for additional author’s notes | playlist | prev | m.list

chapter synopsis:

“You’ll hate me once you see what happened.”

“No, Megumi, I won’t,” you reassure him, “And anyway, things are different now, too.”

---

You could never hate him. After years of waiting to see Tsumiki again, you can finally do so now. Yet still, there's a sombreness in the air, and Megumi won't let you place a finger on it just yet.

word count: ~3k; tws: none for now ^-^

short a/n: hi everyone! I'm so sorry this took so so long, I really missed you all a lot. basically, school and life got a bit busy, but I'm happy to say I'm back now :). I've written an update here where I just talked about some matters regarding the series and my writing. you can read it if you'd like, because personally I think it's quite important for you to do so if you read this fic :)

28-6-2018

“Morning. Did you sleep well?”

Megumi moves the blanket away from him, blinking sleep out of his eyes still. You hoist yourself up until your back is against the headboard.

“The blanket wasn’t here before I fell asleep, I think,” he voices out, nearly inaudible, drenched in the aftermath of a deep slumber, “Did you—”

You nod your head.

“...thanks.”

At this moment, it’s as if nothing exists. Just you and him and the sky at blue hour, on his bed doing something that people who are just friends shouldn’t do. The urge to trace over his face— over his shut eyelids and sharp nose and thin lips— clings to you like a second nature, one which you never thought you had. There’s hair on his head like a nest you’re itching to touch, spiky and jet black like blades of grass.

You’ve seen this kind of movie before, felt these feelings with your best friend, no less— and now they’ll eat you up from the inside like bacteria on a rotting fruit. Because feeling like this means feeling everything else assault you all at once: you don’t know if you'd like to bury your face into something and scream, or cry from the fact that it may be unrequited, or jump around in joy for everything good Megumi has done for you.

But forget the sorcerers, forget the healing, forget the cursed techniques and the need to be useful and needed for one second, forget your parents, forget Tsumiki, even— and you can’t believe you thought that. What can they offer which you can’t find next to him, right now, on a warm twilight with cold blankets and pillows?

There are so many things you have wanted. But right now, just this is enough.

“Sometimes I regret talking about how I feel, being emotional and things like that— to the point that if I feel things strongly, these days I try not to show them. It’s… the vulnerability, I guess. Letting your walls down. I know it sounds super cliche, and I know that about 80% of the time I probably fail at this, and that it’s not always good being like that—” stirring him further into consciousness, “—but I think you’re the same, just in a different way. You don’t like talking about your feelings. Still, I have to say, I really enjoy this, these things we do.”

His gaze stays locked on yours, and silence fills the air again; nothing but steady breathing. You wonder, if there’s anything he thinks about when he’s alone on mornings like these, whether he thinks about you.

“So do I.”

The girls’ and boys’ bathrooms are right next to each other. So at 4 in the morning, when everyone else is still asleep and the sun is yet to rise, you bump into Megumi after brushing your teeth.

“Not going to shower?” he asks.

“The sound will travel and it may wake the others up. What about you?”

“I don’t shower in the mornings, only at night.”

“Oh, right.”

He pauses for a while, makes a little sound to fill in the gaps of his hesitation. You wait for him patiently. “Tsumiki… I can let you know about what happened to her. The truth is, she—”

“Take your time,” you interrupt him. You aren’t stupid; something bad must have happened to her for him to be like this. Any slither of hope you have left that she’s all fine and good was used to play dumb and deny yourself the truth.

“...let me take you there. To where she is.”

For more than half your life, Tsumiki’s been a constant. As you moved around and floated between friend groups, you felt lonely in every waking moment; only wishing for the days when you had Tsumiki and Megumi again. That was the impact they had on you. So after such a long wait, your heart leapt with joy at the thought of seeing her again.

“Okay.”

“Actually, do they not have a curfew? It’s only 5 am,” you say as the two of you are on the sidewalk, next to each other; not with either of you in front of the other. You pull the strap of your bag up every time it slips down.

“They do, but it’s only until 4 in the morning. It’s not as if it’ll be easy for sorcerers to obey a curfew anyway, so the teachers don’t really check if everyone is observing everything,” he explains, “Hey, I can hold your bag for you, you know—”

“I’ll be fine.”

“It looks heavy. It’ll hurt, and I don’t mind carrying it for you for a while. How many things are in there, actually—?”

“... I do try to pack minimalistically. I don’t have many things in it. I don’t know why it does this.”

“Let me hold it.”

“...okay. Thank you. But next time, you don’t have to.”

“I really don’t mind. It’s uh… like what you said. We take care of each other.”

“I’m surprised you still remember that,” you note, chuckling, “In that case I should try to take care of you more.”

“...you’re already doing more than enough.”

“Hope I’m not being too much, then,” you joke, and your voice sounds a little too fond as you hear it exit your mouth, “I’ll start doubling down from now on.”

A small part of you wants to indulge yourself; to imagine him doing this for you always. To feel the extent of the things he can do for you, and to want to do the same.

You hand him the bag. There’s a ghost of a smile on his lips.

You have a problem here. You’re in deep, aren’t you?

The two of you had decided not to phone up anyone who could drive you there, nor were you able to take public transport from the school’s campus to your destination. In truth, you had no idea why it seemed that he and you were being secretive about it, but since you weren’t sure if whatever happened to Tsumiki was something Megumi wanted others to know yet, you obliged him.

“Where are we headed to, actually?”

“...the hospital.”

“...what?”

“...you’ll see. I’ll be able to explain once we get there.”

It’s as if the expression on his face is written in a language you can’t understand.

It only spurs your worry— what happened to Tsumiki? You’d wanted so badly to see her again and speak to her ever since she stopped all contact with you. The whole time you’d thought she was just busy, or that she would speak to you again soon, as if she were some constant who you couldn’t imagine being absent from your life due to sickness or injury. It hadn’t even occurred to you, that after you checked in on her and hadn’t even seen that she’d read those messages. To you she was a constant, and she’d always come back. You couldn’t imagine a life without her doing so.

First your mother, and now Tsumiki.

“The whole time I thought she just decided to… stop talking to me for a while.”

“If anything was done to her, she would have told you, provided that she could. You weren’t an afterthought to her. She loved you. I… it was my fault, that after everything happened, I couldn’t bring myself to tell you. I’m sorry.”

She loved you?

“I still don’t know what happened. I mean, don’t blame yourself—”

A car passes by and the two of you cross the road. His hand hovers near your back at the end of it, when the pedestrian traffic light goes red and the cars move rapidly behind you. You pretend his actions aren’t blowing up fireworks inside you.

“No, you called me, right? You even tried to reach me, and… after all I did and how I acted… it wasn’t the right thing to do. But I chose not to call you.”

You remember when you did, remember how it stung.

He’s not the only one keeping secrets. You’ve got the letter and the years of yearning you want to let him know about. Yet it would feel like betrayal to yourself, even with the guilt you have from always keeping them. You’re not sure if that guilt is for him or you.

“But you apologised for all of that, and, well— I think I’m mostly fine with it now. It was just… circumstance, I guess. Especially because it was Tsumiki. Not sure what happened to her, but I mean… if it was just what was happening at that time, even if it may frustrate me, I just have to accept it,” you explain yourself, speaking from your chest.

“You’ll hate me once you see what happened.”

“No, Megumi, I won’t,” you reassure him, “And anyway, things are different now, too.” You’ve got more control over your technique, fine-tuned it with practice and determination. You may still be weak at times: you may struggle to heal severe injuries or may get a nosebleed when you’ve pushed yourself too far and tried to heal bruises on four hours of sleep, but you’ve improved.

“No— I’ve hidden it for so long, I don’t know—”

“I mean, look, we all have our secrets. Sometimes we have them even if we don’t want or have to. You don’t have to be privy to all of myself, especially what I try to keep hidden, but if both of us ever want to… we can always take one step at a time, and I think we’re doing that quite well, in my opinion. Besides, you’re here now. And now that we’re both on campus it’s going to be even harder to get away from me.”

He stops in his tracks all of a sudden. You do, too. The words come floundering out of his mouth. “[Name]... I don’t know the… ‘right’ way to say this, but I don’t want to get away from you.”

“Oh.”

“Yeah, I never did.”

“Huh.”

He hums.

“…me neither,” you coax out of yourself.

“...there’s a floral shop nearby. I usually get her some flowers.”

It’s time to get your mother some flowers, too.

The florist there greets the two of you with a wistful smile, and says that she hasn’t seen Megumi in a while. Megumi introduces you as a childhood friend.

“What do you usually get?” you ask.

“Lilies, usually. Carnations and daisies, sometimes, too.”

You’ve only bought flowers to pay respects to the deceased, at least when it was you buying them and not Yuuji. You’d never met your grandfather, but back when your parents still called you their little girl, your father would bring you to the temple where his ashes were kept every year. You’d see that photo of his face, smiling in black and white, next to your grandmother on their wedding day, and you’d notice how your father prayed before it. He’d replace the flowers— carnations, lilies, daisies, and tell you all the anecdotes he had with his father growing up. You’d gaze at the chrysanthemums and carnations with their honey-hued petals, at the lilies and daisies in their clear glass vases, and you’d think of how pretty they were. You think your grandfather would have liked them, his smile a spitting image of your father’s and a spitting image of yours.

“Those are her favourite, right?”

“Yeah.”

“They suit her. It’s a perfect match, because— well, to me, I always thought of parts of her as different things. Her kindness and the joy she shared with other people were cherries. Her hair was brown, so I’d think of chestnuts and that reminded me of Christmas with her, or mont blanc desserts. And her smile was like a flower to me, a bouquet of lilies. At first I only thought that it was because she was pretty and one of the sweetest people I knew, but now it’s more than that— wait, sorry, I’m rambling.”

“No, no— it’s okay,” he replies, almost immediately.

“I’m just excited, is all.”

He sighs, though you don’t know why. “Then you’ll want to scream at me,” he begins, “…I’m sorry. You’re excited and I just… I’m sorry. You’ll understand when we’re there.”

You want to hold him. Tell him that it’s okay. Tell him that no matter what, you could never hate him. That you’d never had the power to, ever since you met him on that spring day.

He chooses one bouquet on display, then heads over to the cashier. You don’t think you’ll be able to hold him at all, today. Or he won’t let you, his walls barring you from him, even when you thought many of them were already gone. You’d been so stupid, thinking the two of you were getting closer, but there was still so much more you had to learn about him now. There was still so much more you had to wait for, until he was willing to take them down.

“Have you known her for a long time?” you ask, exiting the shop. He bought two— one from him and one from you.

“Ever since Tsumiki got admitted.”

“I can pay you back for the bouquets, by the way,” you suggest.

“It’s fine.”

“Gojo’s money?”

“Gojo’s money.”

You snicker.

To be honest, it’s a little difficult walking with him now. The two of you are devoid of any communication whatsoever, a silence calm in the night and early morning yet thickly unbearable once the sun has risen. Before this, you’d been timidly tiptoeing between small talk and deep conversations. Yet now, with the mood of Tsumiki’s incident looming over the air like a ghostly whisper, there’s nothing to talk about, really, as much as you’d like for there to be.

You’d once heard that people who fell in love were able to talk each others’ ears off for hours on end. You could do that with Yuuji. But Megumi has always been different— in your life, at least. He’s not as boisterous, and not as agreeable with most people despite his politeness, but it’s always been a pleasure being silent with him. Sitting in silence. Lying on the bed together. There’s no spark before you, just the tranquility of an ocean at midnight. In the darkness, with shadows.

He’s special. Now you can see that, now more clearly than ever before.

And even now— even when things are awkward and jittery, you find you don’t mind this that much at all. You don’t think you mind anything if you’re doing it with him.

So there are no words between you, and you glance at his face, at the frown that contorts his face so softly and gently.

If you held hands now, it would be pleasant.

If you held hands now, your hands would inch closer to his as shyly as the first hints of spring arrive after winter. Your wrist would reach his, fingers aching for others to interlock with. Then they would slowly graze his palm like a lost man navigating through the wilderness, until you slid your fingers up his arm again. You would keep them on his wrist, at the outline of his veins, and perhaps if you pressed on it hard enough and used the same mental imaging you do for your cursed technique, you would be able to watch as blood flowed through his arteries and veins. You’ve held his wrist before anyway, grabbed it and pulled him along while his hand would slacken a little. At that time you did it almost abrasively.

Maybe he would flinch. And maybe you would pull your hand back.

But then before you realise it he would be tugging on your fingers again, palm against yours, finger to finger. You can even feel it as you think of it now— you would nearly melt in the grooves of his palm, the texture of his skin, and your hand would dance around his a bit until both of your hands wrapped around each other, a snug fit.

“[Name].”

Your breath seems to fall short as you’re pulled from your fantasies. “What?” you ask, your face hot like a pan sizzling with melted butter.

“Are you okay? It’s time to cross the road.”

“Yeah. Just… it’s just… Tsumiki.”

His hand is on your wrist.

“Okay.”

And if your hand slides down to his palm, and you squeeze his hand before he squeezes yours back despite not looking at you at that moment, well—

You’ve done this before, and several times. But yo know why it’s different now.

The sun has risen. There’s a certain pallor on Tsumiki’s face that you’ve never seen before. Under the early morning light it’s as if sunlight is seeping through her like light refracted in water. Her face is torn between peace and a grimace, as if she’s suspended precariously between a dream and a nightmare. A glaring red mark burns into her forehead like carved wood in patterns completely alien to you. There’s no lively ponytail bursting from her head, only the sordid scene of strands of chestnut hair gone flattened and lifeless, her once bright pink lips turned desiccated and pale; the sight of her grinning face from before only slipping through your fingers like powdery heaps of dust. She’s drawn out on the mattress resembling a fawn carcass in a documentary: too young and innocent to be like this, shallowly breathing in the torpid air. Comatose. The sight juts through your heart.

This is different from grief. It feels like suffocation, like heaviness in the air. Your breaths are shallow as you take the clear glass vase, fill it with water and replace the previous lilies with new ones. There is no grief because nothing has been lost, only suspended. Locked in a standstill, for a little while.

“We think it was a curse,” Megumi chokes.

“How can you cure her?”

“There’s no known cure since it was made from cursed energy. All we can do is wait for her to wake up.”

“How long…?”

“Since junior high. A while after you left.” Megumi confesses, “I’m sorry if you’re angry that I should’ve told you sooner,” his voice is strained and soft, a little bit from cutting himself off, “I’m sorry.”

How many times had you thought of seeing her? How many times had you wondered why he’d never call and let you know how she was? Would she survive this, or would you have to wait a hundred times more just to see her again?

He knew all of this. He could have told you.

Don’t be unreasonable, you think. Just focus on what you can do next.

“It’s not your fault,” you sigh, “It’s just that after everything…”

“I’m sorry,” he says.

“I just wish I could’ve known. Then this whole time that I spent waiting—”

“I know,” he goes, begging you to be angry. To hate him, as if anything he’s done to you could be the cause of something so great.

You can cure people. You were placed on this world, born with powers to make or break life’s structures and processes, to cure people. With powers like that you’ve been hunted, sought after, protected— and yet now, when you need to heal this wound of hers, there’s nothing you can do.

It makes you feel so useless it shakes you to the core.

“I don’t know if I can do anything,” you start, half-resolute and half-doubtful. But despite your doubt you know that this is what it’s all about; what you’ve pledged yourself to do— to try your best and be useful. Like walking on a tightrope: you’ll have to march forward in the face of all of this and just force yourself not to look down, because this is all it’s ever been. Maybe, you think for a second, everything in your life has led to this moment. “But can I try?”

“…of course. If anyone could do it, it would be you,” he remarks, voice softening with each syllable.

“…thanks.”

He’s very… tender today. Vulnerable. You suppose it’s because of Tsumiki and refrain from commenting on it.

You focus all your energy into her forehead and her brain, trying your best to somehow work against an obscure charm with an even more abstruse molecular structure.

You can feel it— the strain on your consciousness, how it hurts to even think at some point, but ignore it all and try your best to help her.

Be useful. If you don’t make it work now, her health is going to be up in the air for longer. If you don’t make it work now, you won’t know if you’ll be able to speak to her again, to thank her for everything— for teaching you to be kind and loving, for caring for you and appreciating parts of you when you’d never felt it before, for her cherry hair tie and her bright smile and her endless wisdom and—

[Name]?

If you don’t make it work now, how many more months will she have to spend without smiling through life and sharing her love with others?

You want to scream at Megumi sometimes, actually.

[Name]!

If you don’t make it work now, how much time of her life would be wasted in the end, when she had so much potential to change the world and shine her light on others?

…he could have just told you from the start!

You have to focus. If he told you this at the start, would that have changed anything?

Be useful.

[Name]!

You have to make it work. You have to bring Tsumiki back.

taglist:

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apolloscastellan · 8 months ago

Text

Never quite buried | loss of my life chapter 4

Pairing: Art Donaldson x Tashi Duncan x Patrick Zweig x FemaleTennisPlayer!reader

Summary: Your life had always been divided in two: before you met Tashi and after you met Tashi. The second you had laid eyes on her for the first time you knew you had been changed. You were soulmates, meant for each other Nothing could ever tear you two apart, or so you had thought. You could've pinpointed the junior U.S. Open as the night that changed everything. Now you have to juggle your hate-love relationship with tennis with your love-love relationship with Tashi and the two guys who you can't seem to stay away from. Tennis, after all, was only one of the most fucked up relationships of your life.

Warnings: challengers spoiler, challengers content warnings, super minor character death, terrible mother figure, use of y/n, polyamory.

Word count: 6.5K

A/N: Please let me know what you think bc my motivation is severely lacking rn, i feel like i'm writing into the void

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Tashi remembers perfectly the day your retirement from singles hit the news. It was all everyone could talk about. First, it was the statement on your social media. A well thought out paragraph about your struggles with continuing to enjoy tennis the way you used to and deciding to take a new route, it ended with a promise for more and better news soon. Then it was the teasing posts from Adidas, the “she is not done just yet” and the “love conquers all”. It all came to a peak with the release of the pictures of you and Patrick. Both of you wearing matching Adidas apparel, practicing in the private court you had in your backyard. The chemistry between the two of you was obvious to everyone who saw them. There was a glint in your eyes that no one had seen since you went pro. She knew the smile you were giving Patrick all too well, it used to be reserved for her.

Her and Art, who had just very recently reconnected, sat on his couch for hours watching the tennis channel, waiting for updates. The relief they felt when it was announced that you were not quitting because you were fatally injured, as everyone had originally thought, was short lived. Neither of them spoke as the commentators showed the images of you and Patrick. Practicing, giggling, getting closer, him giving you that teasing smirk they both knew, you throwing your head back laughing, him beaming at you when you weren’t even looking, both of you focused on the ball, kissing… They both thought about turning off the TV, hitting some balls to work out how they were feeling, but then you were introduced into the set, a vibrant smile as you walked in, dressed in jeans and a t-shirt too big to be yours. The Mark Rebellato Tennis Academy logo only confirmed the obvious. You shook hands with everyone, sitting on the sofa they had reserved for you.

“Y/n Y/l/n, thank you for being here” the older man said, over the clapping of the crowd.

“Thanks for having me!”

“What a day it’s been for all of us, tennis fans. You’ve had us on the edge of our seats! First we mourned, now we’re celebrating… Please tell us why did you do this to us?”

“I am so sorry! I am, I really am” you laughed as the man teased you, God how they missed that laugh. “I have a flair for the dramatic, I must admit, and I am, in a way, saying goodbye to my career as I know it. It’s the start of a new chapter, and it’s really exciting, but it is also a goodbye and it felt right to give it its proper moment. I didn’t realize so many people were going to be so upset about it.”

“Why the switch? Why decide to give up singles completely?”

“I wasn’t enjoying it anymore, it was painful and I had started dreading every second of it. Fortunately, I am in a position where I can decide I don’t want to keep doing something that is bringing me down, so I took advantage of it. I didn’t want my stubbornness to completely ruin my love for tennis. I thought I could step back, maybe take up teaching and try to find that passion again. I was going to quit regardless, so this playing doubles thing happened at just the right time.”

“Yeah, let’s talk about that! You’ve decided to become a full time mixed doubles player with Patrick Zweig, who is a challengers player, somewhere in the two-hundreds. You are currently ranked number one in the world, how does this happen?”

“I think rankings and numbers can be misleading sometimes. Sometimes a player is not playing their best because of external reasons, or simply because they are not meant to be where they are. I think me and Patrick are meant to play together, I really do. And if you can’t trust anything else, trust this: I am really competitive and I hate losing, I would not put myself in a situation like this if I really thought we couldn’t win.”

“From what I’ve heard Zweig and you are committed to each other both on and off the court. You’ve never been open about your private life in the media, and he is the first boyfriend you’ve ever made public, what’s different about him?”

They couldn’t take their eyes off you as you let a bashful smile spread on your face.

“I mean… Everything. I am pretty possessive of my privacy and we still don’t plan to share everything we do, but the truth is that I have never been open about any boyfriends because I have not had any serious relationships since I went pro. Patrick and I will be playing and training together so I thought it was bound to come out, so to me, I'd rather have that happen on my terms. And I do think Patrick is very different to all relationships I’ve had before, in the best way possible”

Art swallowed, refusing to look at Tashi when she turned to watch him. He didn’t deserve to be jealous. He knew that, if he had treated you right, you would still be together. That knowledge didn’t change how he felt.

“How does that happen? How does one manage to make the Y/n Y/l/n fall in love with them?”

“Well, me and Patrick met each other a while ago, at the U.S Junior Open, actually. He won it, I got second, we hit it off instantly. But it was one of those situations where it’s never the right time, you know? We kept missing each other, we were in relationships with other people, and we ended up drifting apart when I went pro. And then, funnily enough, we bumped into each other at an Adidas party about a year ago, and the rest is history.”

Art couldn’t bring himself to be angry when the TV shut off. He turned to look at Tashi who stood there with the remote in her hand, not looking at him.

“I’ll see you in ten in the court. We need to work on your serve.”

He didn’t need to be told twice, grateful for the excuse to take his feelings out on the ball. To think about anything that wasn’t your smile as you talked about Patrick. He didn’t say it out loud, but he knew Tashi felt the same way, the sudden urge to train had not come out of nowhere.

New Rochelle, New York. August 24, 2019:

You look down, shaking your head as Patrick crashes his racquet repeatedly against the floor. The umpire’s voice ominously announcing the score. You raise your face back up when Patrick gets given a penalty. Art walks nonchalantly back to the bench, you can feel Tashi’s smug grin beside you. You make eye contact with your husband and shake your head, he rubs his face with both hands, then nods. As much as you both don’t really care to win this tournament, he knows you’ll be angry if he just lets it go, gets angry and in his head and lets Art have it on conduct alone. So he sits back and waits, ready to be better, to prove himself to you once again, like every time he steps on the court.

Earlier that week. New Rochelle, New York. August 18, 2019:

Tashi is working, writing stats on her computer when she sees Patrick walking towards her from the corner of her eye. She rolls her eyes as he stops behind her, pointing at her screen before he speaks:

“He’s not bad, I played him at a few of these things when I did singles.”

“What are you doing here? Shouldn’t you be practicing to not humiliate your wife before she carries you through the U.S. Open?”

“I just finished, thanks for caring.”

“Wonderful” she says, not a hint of amusement in her voice.

“Hey, come have a cigarette with me, I have to talk to you.”

“Yeah I don’t smoke, and I’m not talking to you.”

“Neither do I. It was just an excuse.”

She looks back at him, unimpressed, but he doesn’t let up. He stands there, staring at her until she gives in, closing her computer and standing up. Patrick is not sure what he is doing. He probably shouldn’t be doing anything at all, if he’s honest with himself. But he has dug a hole too deep to jump out of now, so he is going to follow through. He is doing this for you, he reminds himself, no matter how angry you’ll be with him at first, he is doing this for you. They find an empty alley and look back at each other, Tashi waits for him to speak, he takes his time collecting his thoughts before he does.

“I’m gonna propose something to you and it’s going to make you angry. It’s going to make you very angry,” he can’t help the smirk growing on his face, her expression doesn’t let up. “I want you to be our coach next season.”

“What?”

“Our coach is retiring, we need someone else. I want you to be our coach from next season on.”

“Does she know you’re offering me this position?”

“No, not yet. But she will, and she’ll agree with me.”

“You know that’s bullshit. Plus, why would I want to coach you guys? I already have a highly successful athlete under my wing.”

“Yeah, but even if he wins the Open and completes his career grand slam, Art’s still gonna retire as someone who was really, really good. That’s what you guys will have done together. But imagine if you could get your hands on us. Imagine if you could make us great. You’d go down in history. We have a couple more seasons. We still have a couple more good seasons and I need you to bring it out of us. What do you think?”

He doesn’t expect Tashi to slap him, turning his face completely, although he really should have. He mumbles a curse under his breath.

“How fucking dare you?” she sounds angry, too angry for his stupid proposition. “You want me to give you my best piece of advice? To coach you? Ok, quit.”

Patrick can’t even begin to think of a response, the murderous gaze Tashi gives him fixes him to the spot.

“Quit right now, right fucking now, quit.”

“What are you talking about?” he is too shocked to be offended.

“You’re dragging her down. She should’ve gone down in history as the best ever player. She would have broken records. She should have been good enough to beat the men, and she is what? Going around playing mixed doubles with you? It’s pathetic. Quit, and maybe she’ll have a chance at being an ounce of what she should’ve been.”

“You’re fucking joking”

And now Patrick is angry too. Because he is tired. He is so tired of the endless comments and judgment. He is tired of being blamed for ruining you and your career as if it hadn’t been your decision. As if it hadn’t been your idea. As if he was capable of ever doing that to you. As if he hadn’t begged for you to think it over a million times before you took a step that you wouldn’t be able to come back from. As if he hadn’t been the sole reason the world of tennis hadn’t lost you completely. As if he didn’t try harder than he had ever tried to be enough for you and make sure you never resented him or regretted being with him in any way. The thing that makes him the most angry, though, is that it’s Tashi. And how dare Tashi, the woman who had abandoned you and ruined your love for tennis in the first place, blame him for something she had pushed you to do. Something that was nobody’s fault but hers.

“You must be fucking delusional if you think for just one second that I would ever, ever, ask her to give up on her career for me. You know whose idea it was to play mixed doubles only? Y/n’s. She thought of it, she asked me to do it, she orchestrated every single little detail. And you wanna know why she did it? Because she hated tennis. She was going to quit. She couldn’t stand the thing she loved the most anymore. And you wanna know what made her start to hate tennis, even though her love for it never wavered before, not even with her borderline abusive mum who only loved her for her talent in it? You, Tashi. You did. You ruined tennis for her. So get the fuck off that high horse you continue to ride everywhere, because if there’s one person here to blame for ruining her career, it’s the one I’m looking at.”

He is out of breath when he finishes speaking, and he doesn't know what to do. He has so much shit he wants to throw at her, so much resentment for all that she had put you, and him, through. But he can’t say anything else, the second Tashi’s expression falls, even if it is only for a moment, he can feel his heart shatter inside his chest. No matter how much he hates Tashi, how much he resents her, he loves her. He loves her so much it hurts deep inside his chest, like an ache that is so present he had almost forgotten it existed. But looking at her right now, he feels it, pulsating all through him, and he knows, with a certainty he hadn’t wanted to acknowledge before, that he will never not feel this way about her.

“You don’t know what you’re saying” her voice is stern, but Patrick knows her too well to believe her tone.

“You hate me” it’s not a question. “And you hate her too. Me, for having her. Her for having the career you deserved. And it’s driving you crazy, because as much as you hate us both, you also love us. And as much as you love Art, you hate him too.”

“Excuse me?”

“You hate him because he is just Art, that’s all he can ever be. He will never be me, and he will never be her. And as much as you love him, just Art will never be enough for you.”

“I don’t know what gives you the right to speak about my marriage…”

“The same thing that gives you the right to speak about mine. Does Art know about Atlanta?” he cuts her off.

The pure, unfiltered shock on her face lets him know he has caught her off guard. She did not expect him to know about it. She collects herself quickly, but she doesn’t say anything.

“You keep saying you came here because Art needed matches, but I think you came for something else.”

“You think I came here for you?”

“And for her” he says nodding. “I’ve been signed up for this tournament for months, there’s no way you didn’t see my name in the participants list.”

“You think I came here, to throw it all away for you?”

“Maybe you just wanted to see us…”

“I don’t need to see you to know that you look like shit, and she should get as far away from you as soon as possible.”

She starts to walk away, decisively.

“I’m going to beat him,” he says, it stops her in her tracks, she turns her face to look at him. “If we both make it to the final I’m going to beat him.”

“Even if you did, it wouldn’t change anything.”

“It would break him, you know it would.”

She shakes her head and starts to walk away, too exasperated to come up with another hurtful retort about his failed career. She jogs after her, catching up with her pace almost effortlessly. He grabs her arm, makes her stop walking. He pulls up a piece of paper from the back pocket of his jeans.

“My number, in case you change your mind about the coaching… Or about seeing us again.”

“I won’t.”

He nods, shrugs his shoulders. Then, he watches her put the note in her pocket. He smiles.

New Rochelle, New York. August 24, 2019:

Patrick hasn’t looked away from you even once. You know even though you are looking into your lap. You are hyper aware of every single person around you. Most accurately, you are hyper aware of the woman next to you and the two men playing against each other. You play with your ring as you feel Tashi tell Art to focus. When you finally meet Patrick’s eyes he doesn’t smile. He raises his left hand and kisses the ring on his finger without breaking eye contact as the umpire announces the start of the next set. He crosses paths with Art as he makes his way to the other side of the net but he doesn’t move his eyes from you until he is getting ready to serve. You know then, with absolute certainty, that he is doing this for you.

Atlanta Open, Atlanta. July 18, 2011:

Even though Patrick and you both know why you are sitting in the stands during practice time instead of walking around the venue, or actually practicing, you are still shocked when you see Tashi and Art walk into the court. Your hand reaches for Patrick, holding on to his thigh as if on a rollercoaster that is suddenly going down. You both try to look composed and careless, but you don’t know if you are doing a good job. Art and Tashi do the same, pretending they can’t see you, even though you are the only other ones there and you stick out like a sore thumb. Patrick and you talk to each other, although neither of you would be able to recall anything said during your conversation, and share the fries you had bought before walking over. You pretend you just casually stumbled to sit there for a snack, that you hadn’t checked the schedule to figure out what time and what court Art Donaldson had for pre-match practice. Art hits the ball like he hasn’t been able to hit it in a while, grunting as his racket made contact with it. Tashi looks at you for a second, then back at Art. She nods, satisfied. You want to run away, want to erase that satisfied smirk from her face and your memory. But you stay glued to your seat, hand in your boyfriend’s thigh, heart pounding, and you take the way they ignore you like a punishment.

New Rochelle, New York. August 23, 2019:

The wind is relentless, the trees hitting against the window making repetitive thwack noises that remind Patrick of the sound of the ball hitting the racket. You have been answering emails and making calls to finish preparing things for tomorrow, the U.S. Open, and whatever lies in store for you both after that. Patrick knows that you’ve been messaging potential coaches and though the guilt pit on his stomach keeps growing, he can’t bring himself to say anything to you. He hopes you haven’t set in stone anything, because he is still delusionally confident that Tashi will accept his offer. He knows he should help, whatever you are doing affects him too, but he is too nervous to do anything productive so he just lays around, throwing a ball against the ceiling, or the wall, or whatever he can find. After the third time the ball slips from his hand too early or too late and hits you, you stand up and point to the door.

“Leave, right now” he makes no attempt to move. “Patrick, I mean it. I’m working and I know that you are nervous but you’re stressing me out so go down to the sauna, or get a drink or something that’s not going to make me ask you for a divorce or have to spend the rest of the night finding a place to hide your body.”

Patrick smiles as he stands up. He picks one of the keys from your bedside table and walks over to you, kissing your head before making his way to the door.

“I love you.”

“Yeah, yeah, whatever, love you too. Leave now, please.”

He giggles all the way down the elevator. He doesn’t feel like drinking, which means he doesn’t feel like making a fool of himself tomorrow for getting drunk the night before a match, especially not in front of Art and Tashi. So he walks around until he finds the sauna, maybe that will help him calm down. But as he gets naked and opens the door he can’t believe his bad luck. Although there is a white towel covering his face, there is no denying the naked man sitting right in front of him is Art Donaldson. Patrick doesn’t think there’s a world where he wouldn’t recognize him, no matter how much he’s changed from that scrawny blonde boy he once knew like the back of his hand. He thinks about turning around, walking out, pretending he never saw him, and finding something else to do for the night. But there’s no way Art hasn’t heard the door opening, and Patrick has never been one to run from conflict, not really. So he steps forward, lets his mind get a little bit caught up in the past, sue him he hasn’t seen this guy in years, and opens his mouth:

“Can you do me a favor? Can you not like, demolish me tomorrow?” He says it with the inflection of a pick up line, and before he can even finish his sentence Art is pulling the towel away from his face and looking at him like he already knew that it was him standing at the door, even before he said anything.

They are both smiling as Patrick pulls the sauna door closed and walks toward Art. He is acting far more comfortably than he feels, but if he stops to think about what is actually happening he might start shaking and poop his pants, which would be a terrible thing seeing as he isn’t wearing any. He gets way too close to him, and raises one of his legs on the bench, dick fully on display. Art makes a valiant attempt pretending he doesn’t look down.

“Hey, congrats on being a Phil Tire’s Town Challenger finalist.”

“Yeah, you too” Art says, looking forward to not have to look at Patrick, who is smiling far too wide for the situation they are in and the past that they have.

“Hopefully the wind dies down by tomorrow and we can have a fair fight” Patrick lets himself pretend this is normal, like they are two competitors getting ready for the final, maybe even pals catching up after not having seen each other in a while.

Art doesn’t let him have a second of the little fantasy he’s made up in his head, though. He slides down the bench, getting as far away from him as he can without looking like he is actually running away.

“C’mon, can we talk?” Patrick says, and his voice sounds pitiful even to his own ears.

“Can you put your dick away” Art’s voice is stern, but he looks him in the eye for the first time since he walked in, so he counts it as a win.

“This is a sauna,” Patrick scoffs, putting up a fight so Art won’t notice he’d do anything he told him to. “Look, we've been here for a week and we haven’t said two words to each other. It's just… it’s silly, man. It’s dramatic. I mean, really, why are you so angry with me?”

He sits down, obeying Art and covering his dick. Art is finally looking at him, really looking at him. It has the same effect it did back when they were kids, Art looking at him makes him feel brave. He can’t stop himself from rambling on.

“Look, I don’t buy that it’s because of Tashi, I don’t think it’s because of what happened to her. And I hope it’s not about Y/n, because you have no right… So, I think, maybe, you’re just really disturbed by the fact that they could’ve been into someone like me. Both of them”

“Tashi liked you when we were teenagers.”

“Sure, but I just got married to the girl you said was the love of your life.”

“I ended things with her.”

“And you regret it every single day of your life,” Patrick knew, because it was the same way you and him felt about him and Tashi, “and you know that Tashi does too.”

“What do you mean by that?”

“We both know that if Tashi had been a little more brave back then, she would’ve never taken either of our numbers. If she had been a little bit more honest with herself, she would’ve swept Y/n away and neither of us would’ve had a chance with either of them.”

“That still happened when they were teenagers. When we were teenagers.”

“Huh” Patrick looks thoughtful. “When they were teenagers…”

Atlanta Open, Atlanta. July 18, 2011:

You slip out of your room in a t-shirt that is definitely not yours and the first shorts you stumble across on your way to the door. You can’t sleep and Patrick’s soft snores, which you often find endearing, are getting on your nerves. He doesn’t stir, even as you close the door softly behind you. You don’t know what you are doing, or where you’re going. You take the stairs down, needing to move your body for a little bit. You walk outside, feeling like no matter how hard you breathe in there’s not enough air in your lungs. You lay your weight against the brick wall of the hotel. You get your breathing under control after a couple minutes of staring at the sky trying to look for constellations you don’t know the name of anyways. When you turn around, to go back inside the hotel, you realize that right next to where you were standing there’s a window to the hotel’s bar. There, sitting down, nursing a glass that you can only assume contains something strong, already staring at you, is Tashi Duncan. You don’t know what you’re doing, but you let your feet guide you inside. Then, instead of going up the stairs like you should, you take a right turn and walk right into the bar. Tashi finds you immediately, having been looking at the door. You don’t understand what you’re doing, but before you can think about it you are sitting right in front of her. You haven’t looked at her this up close in years. You search, but you can’t find many differences. She looks exactly like the girl you knew with her hair a little shorter. You wonder if it’s the same on the inside, if the million secrets you knew about her still hold true. If you could still tell which of her smiles were fake, or when she was about to cry but was trying to hold it down.

“I heard you gave up,” she whispers after a minute of staring into each other’s eyes.

“I quit singles, I didn’t give up,” but you can tell she doesn’t really believe you, so you scan her, trying to find something else to talk about. Your eyes lock on the ring in her finger. “That’s a gorgeous ring.”

Your fingers find your own ring instinctively. You don’t know if you’re trying to make sure it’s still there, or if you are trying to ask your dad for strength. Her gaze lowers, first to your ring, then to her own.

“It’s his grandmother’s.”

You nod, you know what that means. Art had always talked about wanting to propose to his future wife with his grandmother’s ring. Back when he fantasized with you about it, it was your hand that ring ended up on. He always talked about taking you to the residency so you could meet his grandmother, completely sure she would love you and give you her blessing immediately. You think of your own sentimental family ring, unsure you would ever be able to trust anyone enough to carry it, no matter how much you loved them.

“How is she?” you ask, more out of politeness than anything else, you never got to meet her, after all.

“She died. Stroke”

You grimace, knowing the feeling of losing the one person who truly believes in you too well. You look around, trying desperately to find something to say, you will your brain to remember the million icebreakers and conversation starters you had been forced to memorize for the awfully boring networking parties your mum used to throw for you. You come up with nothing, so you look back at her and lean over the table and she imitates you. Your faces inches away from each other. You feel drunk even though you haven’t had a single sip of alcohol all day. You don’t question it, Tashi always made you feel like you were going crazy and a little bit drunk. It must be that what pushes you to say what comes out of your mouth next:

“I miss you.”

She doesn’t say anything, but she leans further over the table, getting impossible close to your face without touching it. Then, when you are completely sure she is going to tell you to go fuck yourself and leave her alone, her hand makes her way to the back of your neck pushing you towards her until your eyes meet. There might be a million things that have changed since the last time you did this, but kissing Tashi Duncan feels exactly the same as the first time you did it. It feels like coming home.

New Rochelle, New York. August 23, 2019:

“You’re right” Art says finally, leaning his back against the wall. “I do find it disturbing.”

“There’s no need, man. Lots of girls were into me, but only one of them wanted to marry me. I’ve always thought that was not what I was for, so I don’t know how I did it.”

“Yeah, neither do I.”

Patrick feels his entire skin burn with the way Art looks him up and down. He curses in his head the years they’ve spent apart and the secretive, mature person Art has become, he can’t read him like he could. He can’t tell if he is teasing, or trying to humiliate him. He can’t tell if he’s angry, or just as desperately sad as he is.

Atlanta Open, Atlanta. July 18, 2011:

You don’t know how but you and Tashi have stumbled onto a hotel room that you don’t recognize. It’s much bigger and fancier than yours so you assume it’s hers. You want to ask where Art is, if he is about to walk in on the two of you making out on his bed, but the way she is kissing you makes you forget about everything. You roll onto the bed, hands on either side of her face as hers roam your body freely. It’s too much and not enough simultaneously and you moan and pant on her lips. It’s everything you’ve always dreamt of and you can’t help wanting more. More of her and her body, of her lips, more of her heart. You try to not be greedy, take what she gives you, and soon you’re seeing stars and rolling over, breathing with difficulty.

“That was…”

“Yeah” she mumbles.

“So… What happens now?”

“What do you mean what happens now?” she seems confused as she stands from the bed, walking around until she finds your clothes.

“We just had sex,” you say, obviously.

“Look, we shouldn’t have done this. It was a mistake.” She throws your t-shirt at you, you put it on slowly.

“A mistake?” you’re getting angrier by the second, but you don’t want to yell and alert whoever is sleeping in the room next to this one.

“Yeah, we will act as if nothing happened.”

“What about Art?

“He doesn’t need to know,” you shake your head as you finish putting on your clothes.

“That’s fucked up.”

“Do not act as if I was the only one who cheated! Aren’t you and Patrick dating?”

“I never said that! You can’t just run away from everything you refuse to accept. You haven’t talked to me in years!”

“Yeah, and it should have stayed that way.”

“One day you’re going to wake up and realize that everything you’ve refused to accept all your life is catching up to you, and by then, it might be too late.”

“Get out” she says, instead of replying to what you said, you don’t need to be told twice.

You manage to hold back your tears until you are standing in front of the elevator. You’re fully sobbing when the doors open, revealing a very confused Art. You see him step towards you, but you refuse to let either of them continue breaking your heart. You step backwards, then turn around. You run until you find the stairs. By the time you make it back to your room you look like a mess. You knock on the door, you must have left your key in Tashi’s room but you are too upset to care about that or waking Patrick up. His entire face changes when he opens the door. Worry taking over his expression.

“Y/n, what happened? Where were you?

You fall onto his arms, sobbing. He leads you in, closing the door behind you. You don’t speak until you’re both seating in bed.

“I saw Tashi… And I… We…” you don’t say anything else, but you don’t need to, he understands.

He holds you through the night. The next morning, you forfeit the tournament and go home.

New Rochelle, New York. August 23, 2019:

“Honestly, I thought you’d be happy I was in the draw” Patrick is not ready to let it go, to shut up and walk away from Art, he doesn’t know when’s the next time he’ll be able to talk to him again, so he runs his mouth. “I mean, you’ve always wanted to beat me in a tournament, and two weeks before the open… It’s the perfect confidence booster.

He settles on cocky because he doesn’t know what else to do. He has never been very good at being vulnerable, not with Art, and no amount of therapy is going to make him start now, when he can see how done he is with him from a mile away.

“I know what you’re trying to do right now,” Art smiles.

“I’m not trying to do anything, Art,” but he doesn’t know if he’s telling the truth. “This is a challenger, I don’t need to play mind games with you.”

“Right, you don’t give a shit.”

“Hey, I didn’t say that…”

“We both know that you have a considerably higher stake here than I do.”

“Do I?”

Art laughs, but there’s no real humor to it. Patrick does too, trying to conceal the way he is sure his entire body is shaking.

“Oh, fuck… Where do you get your swagger from, man?” Patrick can tell, from the way Art is looking at him, that this is the part that’s going to hurt, he doesn’t try to stop it. “I mean you come in here swinging your dick around like I’m supposed to be afraid of it but do you realize how embarrassing it is that you are here right now?”

“Not quite as embarrassing as you being here,” Patrick has never known a way to back down, so he stirs the pot.

He’d rather have Art yelling at him or humiliating him than not talking to him at all. His therapist would not be very proud.

“I’m just stopping by, man. You would live here if it wasn’t for her” there’s a pause, suddenly Patrick wants to take everything back, run away with his tail between his legs, but it’s too late. “You know, I’ve always tried to figure out what happened to you, but the more I thought about it the more I realized… It’s what didn’t happen. You never grew up. You still think you can talk to me like you’re my peer because we came from the same place, because you’ve managed to stumble into some of the same competitions. But it’s not about where you came from in tennis, Patrick, it’s about winning. And I do, a lot. And you only do because you tricked Y/n into playing with you. But one day, she’s going to wake up and realize she wasted her entire fucking life in a pathetic man who thinks he’s the shit because he won the junior U.S Open a trillion years ago. And then, you’ll be left with what you deserve: nothing.”

“You’ve never beaten me,” he says, as if it’s what matters out of everything he said.

He says it because if he focuses on what Art said about you, he might cry. He doesn’t want to cry, not in front of Art, not right now. He doesn’t have enough willpower to fight him, like he knows he should, like he did with Tashi.

“So what? I haven’t beaten most of the guys who play in these things, or the ones who only make it into the big tournaments playing doubles. This is a game about winning the points that matter.”

“I don’t matter?” he doesn’t know why he says it, or what he is expecting to get in return.

“Not even to the most obsessive tennis fan in the entire world,” his voice is monotone, tired, Patrick wants to crawl out of his skin.

“We’re not talking about tennis.”

“What the fuck else do I have to talk to you about?”

“I wanted to come in here to wish you good luck, Art,” he says, and he means it.

“That makes no sense,” Art scoffs, looking away, he’s talking to himself more than Patrick.

“I wanted to say that I’m looking forward to it, I miss playing with you,” he is being vulnerable, but he knows Art won’t believe him, which is probably why he says it in the first place.

“Yeah,” he nods his head and he looks amused, but Patrick can see right through him, he’s about to finish him off. “Well, I don’t miss playing with you, man. I’m too old for it.”

As soon as the door is closed behind Art, Patrick lets himself drop onto the bench. He tells himself he is not going to cry. There’s tears running down his face by the time you open the door of your room to him. He doesn’t say anything, he doesn’t need to, you understand.

#challengers x reader #challengers #art donaldson #tashi duncan x reader #tashi duncan #art donaldson x reader #patrick zweig #patrick zweig x reader #annie writes challengers #patrick zweig x art donaldson x tashi duncan x reader #patrick zweig x art donaldson x Tashi Duncan #loss of my life series

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willalove75 · 2 years ago

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Alcina's New Maid Pt. 17 Lady Dimitrescu x Reader

Summary: You have your final few days of training and the morning of the meeting finally arrives.

Warnings: 18+ minors DNI. Very brief mention of suicide (while talking about Donna's past and her parents). No details mentioned, just mentioning the act itself. If you want to skip that part, skip to the dialogue after the paragraph starting with **.

Tags: fluff, light angst

Notes: Part 17! Sorry for the teeny tiny cliffhanger but we were reaching 5k words so I had to cut it off. Next chapter will dive straight into the meeting! Also, I re-read most of this the other day but I'm sick and don't have the mental capacity to go over it again so apologies for any errors!

Click here for the rest of the series

Gif source

The following morning Cassandra woke you up before sunrise again for your last full day of training. Once you were warmed up she started sparring with you again and showing you different ways to get out of different kinds of grapples.

After breakfast she brought out one of her old daggers and handed it to you and taught you how to use it properly now that Karl was making you one of your own. Cassandra showed you how to wield it, and the different ways you can use it for defense and the occasional attack. Once she was satisfied with your movements she ran inside and grabbed a wooden dagger and used that to spar with you.

The first hour of the sparring session ended with her poking you with her wooden dagger in at least eight different places that would kill you. She grabbed Dani and used her as a model to point out where the main arteries in the body were and how to hit them to either kill your opponent or cause massive damage.

She continued sparring with you and teaching you how to block the most important parts of your body to avoid death or severe injury. After a few hours you were finally getting the hang of it and you decided to take a quick break for lunch. Zina brought out your lunches again and Bela and Daniela joined the two of you, all of you eating in the courtyard.

When you finished eating Cassandra quizzed you on the locations of the major arteries again and had you practice sheathing and unsheathing your dagger while you digested. After about an hour it was back to sparring. Once more you sparred with Bela and Daniela but this time they had the wooden dagger. Bela was hard to hit due to her defensive nature and you were able to get a few hits on Daniela because her moves were so erratic and chaotic. None of the hits you landed would have done much damage - no less kill someone - but the fact that you were able to hit her at all meant you were progressing well.

"Okay, now you'll have mother, Aunt Donna and Uncle Karl there to help you if shit goes sideways so you won't have to fight Miranda alone." Cassandra says.

"Which is a good thing because if you fought her alone you would definitely die." Daniela adds in.

"Oh yeah, without a doubt. You'd be super fucked. But even with the three of them Miranda is still stupid strong so it'll still be a really hard fight. Lets team up, you and Dani and me and Bela and we'll do a team match. This will encompass everything, grapples, defense, the daggers, you gotta be on your toes."

The match started and Daniela immediately went after Bela and Cassandra headed directly for you. You were able to fight her off for a decent amount of time before she grappled you. When you realized her grip on you was too strong you were able to grab your dagger and stab her in the leg and get out of it. Even though you missed the artery it was still enough damage to knock her off her game for a moment and get out of her grip.

It felt wrong attacking the girls. Even though you knew a stab like that was the equivalent of a papercut to them. Attacking them wasn't something you enjoyed. Although if you were being honest, attacking anyone wasn't something you enjoyed so at least when you go to stab someone else when they attack you you won't feel as bad as you do when you stab one of the girls.

Bela was able to knock Daniela down and headed over to you to assist Cassandra. Two on one was tough and you didn't last long at all. Although you lasted longer than you thought you would - meaning you were able to fight them off for about a minute instead of immediately being subdued. Bela managed to pin you down and when Daniela finally got over to you, Cassandra was quick to pin her, winning them the match.

The sound of applause rang through the air as Alcina walked over.

"Well done girls. Cassandra, your swordsmanship with the dagger was fantastic, Bela, wonderful defense, Daniela, I don't know how you always manage to keep your sisters on their toes, even after all of these years. And draga, you did a fantastic job, you held your own well. I'm very proud of all of you." She says with a smile. "Now girls, go get washed up, dinner will be soon."

The girls swarm up to give their mother kisses on her cheek and head inside. Alcina walks over to one of the benches and sits down. She pulls you into her lap and holds you close.

"I am very impressed draga mea, truly."

"You are?"

"Yes, I saw you stab Cassandra in the leg to get out of her grasp. Your quick thinking was impressive my love."

"Thanks. I really hope a fight doesn't break out at the meeting. It's one thing sparring with the girls, but with Miranda? I don't know, it makes me nervous."

"It makes me nervous too draga mea. But I'll be there with you and I won't let anything happen to you. Donna and Karl also swore to help protect you so you will be okay." She says.

"I'd hate to be the reason anyone got hurt."

Alcina kisses you on the head and you look up into her golden eyes. She smiles down at you and places a knuckle under your chin and leans down, capturing you lips with hers.

"I won't let anything happen to you, draga mea. I promise." She whispers against your lips.

"I know." You reply before kissing her again.

Alcina nuzzles you and the dinner bell rings.

The two of you walk into the dining room and the girls swarm in. Hunger hits you the moment you smell the delicious food and as soon as your plate it piled you dig in.

Alcina lets you sleep in a little the next morning and just as you're getting dressed the breakfast bell rings. After breakfast Cassandra reviews some of the things she's taught you over the last few days and the two of you finish up right before lunch.

The rest of the day goes by pretty quickly. Cassandra does another quick review with you after dinner and once the two of you are finished you head into your room and find Alcina drawing herself a bath.

"Ah, draga, there you are. How was it?"

"It was good, I was able to retain almost everything she taught me."

"Good, I'm glad to hear it. Would you like to join me?" She asks as she finishes taking off the rest of her clothes and steps into the tub.

You nod and pull off your clothes and toss them in the hamper. Alcina lifts you into the tub and sits you down in her lap with your back against her chest. Once you're comfortable you let out a sigh and lean into her. Alcina wraps her arms around you and kisses your neck.

You're completely enveloped by her, by her scent, by the feeling of her skin against yours, her warm breath skating across your neck. As stressed as you are over tomorrow's meeting you can't help but feel relaxed in her arms. When you're with her like this you feel more safe than you ever have in your life. Even after everything - all of the pain, the hurt, the heartbreak, she's still the one that brings you more comfort than anyone else ever has. If you tried making sense of it you'd surely get a migraine. But right here, in her arms, you're safe. And that's all that matters.

"How are you feeling about tomorrow?" You ask her.

"It's difficult to know how to feel when I don't know what her intentions are, draga. If it were solely about the hunters I would say I am prepared and looking forward to coming up with a plan to deal with them. Although yes, the hunters will certainly be discussed because they are a topic of concern, I know Miranda and I know she's not asking you to be there to solely take notes."

"Are you afraid of her?"

Alcina pauses for a moment to contemplate your question as her fingers mindlessly trace patterns across your skin.

"Yes and no."

"How so?"

"I am not afraid of her for myself. She is incredibly powerful and even though it would not be easy, she could certainly kill me. But I know she won't. She needs myself and the rest of the lords to keep the village under her thumb as she searches for her perfect vessel. And since I do most of the work she knows that killing me would be a mistake. But I fear for the day that she deems us unnecessary because when that day comes, she won't hesitate killing all of us. Her power is nearly limitless and I have no doubt that she will do anything and everything to succeed in finding a suitable vessel for Eva. Even if it means destroying everything around her to do so. Until then she will do whatever she feels is necessary to keep us, the lords, in line. I'm also worried that she is going to try and hurt you to hurt me. I wouldn't put it past her to do something like that again and that scares me, draga mea."

She sighs and holds you tight, nuzzling her nose into your hair. As you take in her words, the word "again" sticks out.

"What do you mean 'again?'"

"Lets finish up in here and I'll tell you in bed."

You nod and you both finish bathing. After drying off and putting on pajamas you crawl into bed and curl under Alcina's chin. Alcina holds you close and continues.

"Many years ago, decades ago at this point, Karl had a paramour. It wasn't someone he truly loved but he did care for them. They were a worker at his factory and the two of them began spending time together. Karl began slacking off to spend more time with them; Mother Miranda got wind of it and she was less than pleased. One day they went missing. Mother Miranda called a meeting and none of us knew why until we arrived and saw Karl's paramour chained down at her feet. She said they were nothing but a nuisance and they were only causing trouble, distracting Karl from her goal of finding a perfect vessel. She ordered Karl to kill them and he refused. Mother Miranda was going to kill them but instead I offered. Karl was furious but I knew that whatever Miranda was going to do, she was going to make them suffer horrifically because Karl refused her. She relented and I was the one who killed them. It was the only time I ever apologized to someone before I killed them. They knew that this was a mercy kill and that Miranda would have done much worse so it was also the only time someone had thanked me for doing it. Miranda was pleased and allowed me to take their body back to the castle to do what I pleased with it. Karl came over the next day and he was so angry, he thought I drained their blood and turned them into one of the vineyards scarecrows. But I didn't, instead I cleared a small spot on the edge of the woods and had them buried. Karl was grateful and after we had a conversation he understood why I did what I did. Karl was still relatively new and hadn't seen Miranda's wrath like I had. He knew refusing her would anger her but he didn't realize she would have taken it out on their paramour instead of himself."

"Is that why he hates Miranda?"

"One of the reasons. He hated her well before that incident. She had kidnapped him and infected him with the cadou when she found out that he was one of the descendants of the four founders of the village. He never got a say in the matter like I did. She just took him and forced it upon him."

"That's so horrible. Why didn't he just leave after he got the cadou?"

"It's difficult to explain but in the end he wasn't able to. Miranda would have hunted him down. Once we were given the cadou, whether or not we had a choice in the matter, we were forced to stay. She was also able to influence him to stay."

"What do you mean?"

"Everyone takes to the cadou differently. I have a theory that those with a higher affinity to the cadou are less affected by Miranda's control. To a certain extent, Miranda controls the mold because her powers were given to her by the Black God, which is where the mold comes from. Since the cadou contains the mold, by extension Miranda has a certain amount of control over it."

"So can she control you?"

"Not necessarily. I believe she has a certain amount of influence over me, but no, she cannot control me because I have a higher affinity to it. For example, the moroaicǎ and lycans have almost no affinity to the cadou so Miranda can control them if she wanted to. In the past she has, but she generally she views them as a waste of time so she gave Karl the job of overseeing the lycans and myself the moroaicǎ."

"So how can you tell who does and doesn't have a higher affinity to it?"

"My theory is that the more mutated the subject, the less affinity they have towards it. The moroaicǎ and lycans are at the bottom, they are the most mutated and most easily controllable therefore have the lowest affinity. Next comes Salvatore, whom you haven't met yet. He is severely mutated and will do anything to please Miranda. Next I believe is Donna. Although her only mutation is on her face, she is very mentally unstable which leads me to believe that Miranda can more easily influence her."

"How is she mentally unstable?"

Alcina lets out a sigh as her fingers dance across your skin.

**"It is quite a tragic story. Many years ago, before she received the cadou, her sister, Claudia, died. Donna was very young when it happened and her parents were unable to deal with the death of their child so they committed suicide together leaving Donna all alone."

"Oh my god, that's horrible."

"It was horrific. After they died she isolated herself and developed severe depression and anxiety. When she received the cadou, she took part of hers and put it into Angie and now primarily uses Angie to speak when she's around mixed company."

"Wait, so Donna is that chaotic?"

Alcina laughs and shakes her head.

"Gods no, Donna uses Angie to speak but the cadou granted Angie her own personality. Part of me believes some of the things Angie says are the thoughts Donna would never say out loud but that is just mere speculation."

"So how do you know when it's Donna talking or Angie?"

"Donna's voice comes through Angie."

"Oh, got it."

"Yes. So because of Donna's mental illness, she is more easily influenced by Miranda but since her and I have formed and alliance that influence has been fading."

"How about you and Karl?"

"Based on my mutation theory, I would be next given," Alcina gestures to her body. "and Miranda does have some influence over me, but not much. I have retained enough of my own cognitive abilities to not fall completely under her influence. There are times where I can feel her influence and if I so chose to I can ignore it. But the pull is there."

"Is it hard to ignore?"

"In the beginning it was, but now not so much."

"Can she tell when you ignore it?"

"Yes, but only because when I do, I am not doing what she wants so she knows her influence on me has failed. Whether she knows I consciously ignore her or not is still a mystery."

"So Karl has the highest affinity to the cadou?"

"As much as I loathe to admit it, yes. Which is also why I refuse to relay this theory to him because I would never hear the end of it. But he has no visible physical mutations, at least that I am aware of. And he hates Miranda more than any of us. He refuses to do anything she asks unless it directly benefits him and he has no desire for her acceptance or approval."

"Do you have any desire for her acceptance or approval?"

Alcina pauses for a moment and you look up at her. She has a faraway look in her eyes before she looks down at you and sighs.

"Truthfully? Yes." You feel the hairs on your arms raise at her answer. Not that you're completely surprised, but hearing her say it out loud makes it real, too real. "It's complicated. There is a part of me that yearns for her acceptance. There's a part of me that's willing to do nearly anything for her. I understand how ridiculous that may sound but after so many years of being under her rule, it's difficult to not want acceptance from the person who essentially created you. And since she rarely shows her approval of anyone the thought of being one of the few becomes almost addicting. She has done a lot for me. She saved my life, although it was under false pretenses. Still, I am still alive because of her. She gifted me the girls, gave me the castle, the vineyard, and the business so I had a way of supporting myself. She has done a lot for me, for my family. In a way in feel indebted to her for those things. But at the same time I hate her. I can't stand what she's done to me, how she's manipulated me and used me over the years." She tightens her grip around you as she thinks back on her past history with Miranda. "I despise how she treats my daughters poorly. I hate that after everything I do for her, after everything I've done, she still views me the same as the rest of them. It aggravates me to no end."

"So you hate her, but at the same time you want to be her favorite? You know that sounds crazy, right?"

Alcina chuckles and rolls her eyes at you.

"I said is was complex, draga."

"Complex is an understatement." You say with a laugh.

Alcina shakes her head and runs her fingers through your hair. An unsettling energy fills the room as the two of you think about tomorrow's meeting.

"Even though I feel that pull of her influence, even though I crave her acceptance, I will never let her hurt you. I don't want you to think for a moment that I won't do everything I possibly can to protect you, draga."

"I know." You say, cuddling into her more.

"Good. Now try and get some sleep draga mea. Tomorrow is going to be a long day."

Her fingers comb through your hair and you feel her nails scratching at your scalp. She holds you a little closer after pulling the duvet over the both of you.

Even though you're tired you can't seem to fall asleep. Anxiety begins to creep its was into your chest and you cling to Alcina a little tighter.

"Rest, draga. I can hear your heartbeat from a mile away."

"I'm sorry, I'm just nervous."

"So am I, but you need to sleep."

"I can't."

Alcina lays you on top of her, resting your head on her chest. One of her large hands scratches at your scalp as the other traces patterns across your back.

"Close your eyes, draga mea. I have you. I will protect you, I promise."

"I know you will. And I love you so much for that."

"I love you too."

Alcina starts singing, her fingers moving perfectly in time with the song and your eyes start to flutter shut. Even though you don't know what song it is since it's in Romanian, whatever she's singing is soothing and begins to lull you to sleep.

Alcina hears your breathing and heartrate settle and knows you finally drifted off. She finds herself having a hard time falling asleep - she's too anxious about tomorrow's meeting. But the soft sounds of your snores help her to relax and a little while later she dozes off into a restful sleep.

The following morning you wake up in the same exact position you fell asleep in; laying on top of Alcina with her arms wrapped tightly around you. Alcina feels you stir in her arms and brushes the hair away from your eyes.

"Good morning, draga mea." She says with a kiss to your head.

"Good morning." You say with a yawn as you stretch out on top of her and curl back up in her arms. "Did you stay here all night or did you get up to work and pull me back on top of you when you came back to bed?"

"No, draga." She says with a chuckle. "I stayed here all night with you."

You didn't say anything in response, just a light chuckle and then you nuzzled your face into her neck. Here in bed, in her arms, it was safe. You were safe. There wasn't a single part of either of you that wanted to get out of bed this morning. Neither of you wanting to leave the comfort and safety of each others embrace. The thought of starting the day made you a little anxious but after taking a deep breath and filling you nose with the scent of Alcina's skin and shampoo, your anxiety melted away and you relaxed into her.

"Can we stay here forever?" You asked as your lips brushed against her skin while your face was buried into her neck.

"I wish, draga mea. I wish." She sighed.

Reluctantly, the two of you finally got out of bed. The meeting was taking place in the chapel at the castle shortly after breakfast so both you and Alcina started getting yourselves ready for the day.

Alcina put on her usual floor-length cream dress, leather gloves, pearls, and her hat. The two of you decided that it was best that you wore the uniform that her handmaidens normally wear. She was sure that Miranda knew the relationship between the two of you was past the point of you just being her handmaid but in order to keep appearances up you both decided wearing the uniform was the way to go.

Once Alcina was finished fixing her hair and makeup the two of you headed down to the dining room for breakfast. Just as you were walking in the girls swarmed in and appeared in their seats.

"Good morning mother!" The girls said in unison.

"Good morning daughters." She said.

You could tell the girls wanted to ask how you and Alcina were feeling about the meeting but none of them dared to. They could tell Alcina was already on edge and they didn't want to make her worse. The nerves in your belly slowly but surely began to build as the time to leave creeped closer. Even though you weren't hungry you forced yourself to eat a decent meal because you knew you were going to need the energy.

Breakfast was quiet and the tension in the air steadily built as the time passed. Every so often you would look over at Alcina and every time you did you noticed she was further and further away mentally. You could tell that her mind was heavily focused on the meeting and that the newspaper in her hand was just a front. The only reason you knew that was because she stayed on the same page throughout the entire meal yet burned through at least four cigarettes. She looked as if she was rereading the same sentence over and over again as her mind wandered. By the time breakfast was over her eyebrows were so closely knit together they nearly became one.

When the girls finished eating they all kissed their mother on the cheek and wished her luck at the meeting. Daniela and Bela gave you a hug before they left and Cassandra punched you on the shoulder and mumbled "don't die." before swarming away.

As the girls left Zina entered the dining room.

"Pardon me, my Lady." She said to Alcina, whose eyes were back on the newspaper. "Lady Beneviento and Lord Moreau have arrived."

Alcina looked up and nodded before taking a sharp inhale and putting the paper down. She took one final drag of her cigarette before putting it out in the ashtray and downed the rest of her wine in one large gulp. Removing the napkin sitting on her lap, she carefully dabbed the corners of her lips and looked towards you and back to Zina.

"I made sure the chapel was stocked with extra wine. One bottle of sanguis virginis and the rest of your finest vintage, my Lady."

"Thank you Zina, your fine attention to detail never goes unnoticed."

"My pleasure, my Lady."

"Ready, draga?" Alcina asks you. You nod in response and she stands up. "We shall be off then."

As Alcina walks past Zina, Zina hands her her cigarette holder with a lit cigarette already sitting at the end. Alcina nods at Zina with a small smile and leaves. As you walk past Zina she stops you by putting her hand on your shoulder.

"Be careful." She whispers with a small squeeze before removing her hand and heading back towards the kitchen.

Alcina expertly guides you through the castle halls. Once you leave the main part of the castle you notice that the halls are less ornate. The smooth stone walls slowly turn more jagged and unkept and the cracks in the floor grow until the stones beneath your feet are uneven. You've never seen any part of the castle in such a state of despair before. Alcina doesn't say a word the entire time. The juxtaposition of her and your current surroundings is a fascinating one. Her steps are purposeful and she's as elegant as ever as she strides through her domain. Alcina is a woman of elegance, of nobility, she's a queen roaming the halls of her castle. Yet the current surroundings show evidence of disarray. The further down the hall you walk the worse it gets. Alcina would never let the main areas of the castle look like this. If a spec of dust is left behind she throws a fit. You wonder why she's allowed this area to fall apart so much, seemingly without care.

She leads you to a large door and turns towards you. As you finish taking in your surroundings you look up at her. There must have been a look of confusion on your face as you took in the crumbling walls around you because you hear Alcina sigh.

"As you know, I take pride in keeping my castle in top shape so I am sure the passageway has been rather out of the ordinary." You nod your head in response. "This side of the castle sustained extensive damage during the war and I was never able to properly conduct the repairs. The dilapidated state ended up keeping wandering maids away and it warded off unwanted visitors. It was far too much trouble to repair it and since it provided almost guaranteed privacy for these meetings I allowed it to remain in such a despicable state."

"Got it. That makes sense." You say with a small smile. Alcina returns the gesture but her smile doesn't reach her eyes.

She takes a deep breath and exhales. Her eyes stay on the floor and she looks like she is having trouble saying something.

"Are you okay?" You ask.

"Yes. I have something to ask of you, and I hate that I have to ask this of you."

"What is it?"

"In order to attempt to keep appearances up, I don't think it would be wise for you to," she pauses for a moment. "for you to call me Alcina during the meeting." She says quietly. Her eyes flick up to yours and they're filled with concern. "I know we are well past formalities but I'm worried about Miranda as it is and if she hears you call me by my given name, I fear it will make things worse."

Alcina starts to ramble a little and you take a step forward and reach out to grab her hand.

"Hey," you say, looking into her eyes. "I get it, it's okay. I promise."

"Are you sure?"

"Of course, my Lady." You say with a smirk.

Alcina releases a breath that sounds like a sigh of relief and she cups your face with her hand.

"I truly don't know what I ever did in my life to deserve you, draga mea." She whispers.

The two of you share a moment as you gaze into each others eyes. Angie's cackle rings out on the other side of the door, effectively ruining the moment the two of you were having. Alcina closes her eyes and takes a grounding breath before adjusting her posture and putting her "countess" mask back on.

"Stay by my side and do not do anything unless I give you the okay. Understand?"

"Yes, my Lady."

She nods in approval and looks at the door and back to you.

"Shall we?" She asks.

You nod in response and she pulls a key out of the band around her hat. The door unlocks with a soft "click" and swings open. Alcina returns the key and she ducks under the doorframe, making her way into the chapel.

"Here goes nothing." You think to yourself before following behind her.

#willalove75 #lady dimitrescu #wlw fanfic #alcina dimitrescu #lady dimitrescu fanfic #re8 lady dimitrescu #lady dimitrescu x reader #lady alcina #re8 alcina #alcina x female reader #alcina x reader #re8 fanfiction #re8 village

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callmebrycelee · 10 months ago

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MY DEFINITIVE RANKING OF THE 9-1-1 SEASONS

I got into this show back during the pandemic and I have grown to love all of the characters and the storylines. Now that I've finished season 7, I thought it would be fun to rank each of the seasons. Let's start with my least favorite season and work our way up to what I believe is the best season of 9-1-1.

#7 - Season 5

Why I chose this ranking? This season felt so disjointed. I usually enjoy the disaster episodes but the 3-part season opener seemed to drag on and on. I will say that the season drastically improved when Maddie and Chimney returned from Boston. Still, it sucked to have Maddie and Chimney gone for most of the season and then Michael and David left to go to Haiti. Eddie worked at dispatch which was weird and then they killed off Claudette right as I was finally starting to like her. What a strange season. I blame the pandemic.

Fave episode? "Boston"

Least fave episode? "Wrapped in Red"

Season MVP? Henrietta "Hen" Wilson

#6 - Season 4

Why I chose this ranking? Speaking of the pandemic. I don't think this was a bad season. I quite enjoyed this season and it was the first season I got to watch live. The disaster episodes (earthquake + mudslide) wasn't as grand as the previous disaster episodes. I will say that this season did deliver a lot of solid moments. We got to see Buck's backstory. Hen started medical school. Maddie gave birth. We got Josh's backstory as well. The treasure hunt episode was super fun and we ended the season with Eddie getting shot. Now that I think about it, the only reason this season ranks for low for me is because the other seasons are just so good.

Fave episode? "Buck Begins"

Least fave episode? "Parenthood"

Season MVP? Evan "Buck" Buckley

#5 - Season 6

Why I chose this ranking? Season 6 was a vast improvement on the hot mess that was season 5. We didn't get a disaster episode this season (unless you count the bridge collapse in the last episode) but that's okay because we got to see Athena catch the guy who killed the girl she knew growing up who went missing. We also saw Hen leave medical school. Buck got struck by lightning and Bobby and Athena tracked down the people who murdered Bobby's sponsor. We saw an alternate reality where Buck met his brother Daniel and Chimney finally proposed to Maddie. P.S., she said yes!

Fave episode? "The Devil You Know" and "In Another Life"

Least fave episode? "Death and Taxes"

Season MVP? Athena Grant and Evan "Buck" Buckley

#4 - Season 1

Why I chose this ranking? Unlike the first season of its spin-off series, I quite enjoyed the first season of 9-1-1. There are a few episodes I often revisit. The only downside to this season is the tone of the episodes and the characters. There's very little humor and everyone is the worst version of themselves. Athena is angry and prideful. Bobby is miserable. Hen cheats. Chimney lies. Buck is a ho. There's no Eddie nor Maddie. However, we do have Abby and I actually liked her before her character left at the end of the season. I do think that as the season went on, they figured out who each of the characters are. Buck toned down his rakish ways and actually became likable. Bobby let his walls down finally. Athena softened. Hen made up with Karen. Chimney got some self-esteem. Overall, a solid but short season.

Fave episode? "Worst Day Ever"

Least fave episode? "Point of Origin"

Season MVP? Bobby Nash

#3 - Season 7

Why I chose this ranking? Perhaps it's recency bias but I really enjoyed this short but bittersweet season. The change from FOX to ABC was a major boon for the series. The 3-part cruise ship disaster opener was well done and you can tell that the network poured a LOT of money into the episodes. Bobby and Athena survived their Poseidon Adventure-style honeymoon just in time for their surrogate son Buck to come out as bisexual. This was a major shocker for most viewers and a great choice for the character whom some had long suspected was not straight. Pairing Buck with former 118 firefighter Tommy was brilliant and it felt good to see Buck happy this season. Next, we got to see Chimney marry Maddie. Hen and Karen fostered a little girl named Mara and Eddie cheated on his girlfriend Marisol with a woman who looks remarkably like his dead wife, Shannon. We nearly lost Bobby and poor Eddie was left single and childless by the end of the season. Usually I'm exhausted at the end of a season but this season has left me super excited for season 8.

Fave episode? "Buck, Bothered and Bewildered"

Least fave episode? "Step Nine"

Season MVP? Tommy Kinard for saving Bobby and Athena and bringing happiness to our dear Buck's life.

#2 - Season 3

Why I chose this ranking? I honestly went back and forth on my number one and two choices. I really like season 3. It's so much fun. We start things off with a disaster episode (tsunami). Tensions get high when Buck sues LAFD putting his job and friendships in jeopardy. Eddie inexplicably joined a fight club. Hen is involved in an accident that takes the life of a young woman. Everyone goes to therapy. The dispatch center is hijacked. Abby comes back and Buck is finally given closure. Athena gets brutalized and almost killed by a serial rapist. Maddie finds out she's pregnant. We meet Chimney's half-brother Albert. We also get Athena and Eddie's backstories. Overall, this season is pretty amazing.

Fave episode? ""Sink or Swim" and "The Searchers"

Least fave episode? "Rage"

Season MVP? Athena Grant

#1 - Season 2

Why I chose this ranking? Without further ado, my favorite season of 9-1-1 is season 2! This, hands down, is the best season of the show and here is why. Episode 1, we get Eddie (and his 8-pack) and Maddie. We get an earthquake disaster episode. The 118 gets dosed resulting in Bobby losing his sobriety. We meet Norman and Lola. Wet get Hen, Chimney and Bobby origin stories. Maddie was kidnapped by her deranged ex-husband and she ended up having to kill him. Eddie's wife dies and Bobby and Athena get married after a firetruck crushes Buck's leg. This season from beginning to end is perfection. The tone of this season feels lighter and brighter .

Fave episode? "This Life We Choose"

Least fave episode? "Haunted"

Season MVP? Eddie Diaz and his cute as a button kid Christopher

#abc 911 #911 abc #evan buckley #athena grant #howard chimney han #maddie buckley #eddie diaz #hen wilson #tommy kinard #christopher diaz #bucktommy #buddie #tevan #madney #bathena #henren

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craetor · 4 months ago

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Hi....! If you don't mind, can I ask, who are your top 5 favorite romantic relationship's couples in books/ manga/ anime/movies/tv series (can be canon or non-canon) and your top 10 favorite characters ever from any media? Why do you love them all? Thanks if you want to answer....

Omg hi! Yeah no problem! Hope they're not too obvious. I've done this before so this is a nice update♡

5th favorite ship: Griffguts

I usually hate romance that's based on misunderstandings but Griffith is just so cunty and I love how he comes onto Guts, who totally likes it but is such an oblivious dude about it. If Griffith wasn't so tight-lipped about his inner workings toward everyone, let alone the one he wants more than literally anything and could absolutely have, as Guts proves to him so many times, they'd be such a power couple. I've written about their potential several times in fics. Their misunderstanding is annoying but kinda funny, which I enjoy a lot, as you're going to find out further down the line. Also the rivalry they eventually find themselves in is very hot because whenever they see each other it's like a visceral reaction. I don't like the Berserk story a whole lot. I just like to focus on their relationship.

4th favorite ship: Billford

The psychosexuals. They also speak to my monsterfucker side a lot (Bill for being a psychotic demigod who doesn't have any fine-tuned idea of tactfulness & autistic antisocial nerd who just wanted to be a monster hunter). I love myself a codependent gay romance. I love particularly much how much Ford is genuinely just into being ruined by Bill, getting tattoos for him, following his self-righteous, usually simple-minded demands (like getting rid of Frilliam & building the portal just so he can have a stable dimension to return to after another night of heisting & partying) and letting him alter his very mind. I also like that they spiral into this (at first genuinely macabre, but later) silly rivalry, when Bill comes down a bit from their falling-out and has moved on from ruining his life and resorts to flicking Ford's nose, ruffling his hair and hashtag pranking him by turning him into a gold effigy ("why did the old man do this ✋️⚠️✋️" is so great omg...). Old man yaoi. They're really fun.

3rd favorite ship: Saiouma

Some of Danganronpa's characters have no business being this freaking complex. I adore their cat and mouse game, but Kokichi's sweetness toward Shuichi makes it my favorite detective-thief relationship ever. I'm a sucker for the trickery and mind games but in other Sherlock-Moriarty type situations I always miss the moment where the two look into each other's eyes in a heated moment and see a glitz of honesty that makes them all weak. Also, through canon Saiouma interactions most of the evidence that Kokichi isn't an evil freak can be derived, which is why I often enlace the two topics. I used to be EXTREMELY obsessed with them and know them like the back of my hand. They make me sigh dreamily and smile.

2nd favorite ship: Komahina

Intended from the beginning or not, they're super well-written. They are in eachother's business in every timezone of their teenage lives we get to see. If it's pre- or post-lobotomy, they see every change in each other's life through. They're such oddballs next to each other, but they're so freakily compatible. When they insult and fawn over each other in canon my heart blooms. Because it's fucking funny but also I believe this uncensored honesty is extremely important to both of them. It's important that the other can take it, and he does. Immediately they're less contrived than the mainstream hetero relationships I loathe. When I think about how they ruined and then built up and then ruined and build up each other's lifes it undoes them so beautifully because half the time they don't even know it's each other at the time. When I imagen what they'll become after the end of the canon story I just know they'll do so well for each other. They're just exhausted. Let them have their little relationship.

Favorite ship: Lawlight

Even after all the shows and movies I've been watching lately, all the new pairings I've been exposed to, they remain my favorite. They're just perfect. I just empathize a lot with them, I guess. All the truly solid relationships in my life are based on an initial rivalry or constant bickering, constant rearranging and reaffirming our statuses, which eventually becomes one perfectly balanced and dense element, like a diamond. I can't but feel comfort in analyzing them and see that they could be much the same. And it's not just the projection that brings me comfort. Death Note is a legitimately good piece of media that I enjoy ironically and unironically. Takeshi Obata is my favorite artist after Francesco de Goya & Madhouse (my favorite animation studio) absolutely cooked when they made the show. I'm always so happy to be exposed to them & their memory is such a cherished part of my brain. I don't think I've felt this way about any other pairing (this intensely, I mean. Komahina aren't on my mind a lot anymore).

I'm so disappointed that there are no (true) yuri relationships that make it into my top 5. Only some yuri yaoi & for-lesbian BL.

My (roughly) top 10 favorite characters (I love analyzing concepts of people):

• Violet Evergarden (10/10 stories, lovely character as story telling device, walking sapphic symbolism, I love that she's never sexualized♡♡♡)

• Gundham Tanaka (love his vibe, especially when Sonia is around. We stan a self-confident loser who found comfort in alt fashion)

• Griffith

• Souichi, both young and old (from Junji Ito's Souichi) (I hate him he's so shitty💖)

• Johan Liebert (he's entirely underrated. His motivations are so complex and ambivalent. Thank Madhouse for introducing me to another slay.)

• Yumeko Jabami (because Kakegurui is one of my all-time favorite shows & I have to pick the nexus of it all to symbolize that. I also love her design)

• Miu Iruma (she's so period. Pop the wig finna snap boot the house down hunty werk. The way Kokichi and her bounce off each other is so entertaining. She's so fun and literally genuinely smart. So sad she had to go. I could totally see her as a survivor too)

• Kokichi Ouma (I'm still upset gamegrumps don't understand him. He's phenomenally written. Almost ridiculous amount of effort on the devs' side)

• Nagito Komaeda (my wonderful son with a dozen disorders)

• L Lawliet (INTJ king. Silly, tragic, interesting, what more must I say?)

I've been having insane brainrot about the mass production Evas, Hanuš from Spaceman & the demigod from The Ritual because they're very fuckable, as I've finally come into myself as I've realized I'm kinning Stanford Pines (which led to a small unraveling at first, not alleviated by my strong pull towards the Canadian/Icelandic wilderness I've been feeling for years and am about to give in to. Just kinda made it feel like my fate of falling into the hands of a hot, malevolent ancient deity is sealed).... But they're just crushes so... foot note for them.

#my writing #death note #danganronpa #lawlight #saiouma #komahina #naoki urasawa's monster #griffguts #berserk #billford #gravity falls #junji ito #kakegurui #violet evergarden #ask #character analysis

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hestzhyen · 3 months ago

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WSJ 2024 Musings

Please pardon the self-indulgence, kind void. It's the end of the year and I give almost everything that the magazine runs a chance, so I wanna reflect on the 2024 Weekly Shounen Jump "experience". Behold the kind of hobby data I track in spreadsheets (yes I'm a lonely person, please no bully).

Format

Title (start month/year, # of chapters) - thoughts & impressions. Each category sorted from oldest title -> newest

Axed (U19 or Close Enough)

Martial Master Asumi (06/23, 32 chapters) - I liked this and I genuinely don't understand why it didn't succeed. Nito and Nao were a great duo, the sport was lovingly depicted, and the story was unfolding at a great clip while being easy to follow despite me not knowing a damn thing about MMA. Nito was kind of annoying with how hesitant he was, but he was getting a lot better right before the series was cancelled. Chalking this up to Japan's shit taste I guess.

MamaYuyu (09/23, 29 chapters) - REEEEE I LOVED THIS except for the uninspired magic system and harem elements (Minerva best girl by the way). Also had a distinct lack of Mama Yuyu despite her being in the title. The horror aspects of this were amazing though and I hope the author does a spooky series. He really has a talent for depicting the unnerving.

Two on Ice (09/23, 28 chapters) - sports series have to be super gay or super good in premise to get me to read them and this didn't qualify on either point. Not sure what I missed but guess it wasn't much.

Green Green Greens (11/23, 26 chapters) - same as above and lol golf, good luck in a magazine mostly aimed at a school-age demographic (not even the Kuroko no Basuke guy could make it work).

Shadow Eliminators (12/23, 19 chapters) - a really rough start and bad pacing combined with a generic premise killed this from the get-go, I think. It's unfortunate because the author was really cooking by putting a guy in the heroine role (listen, I have my priorities and I won't apologise for them). MC-kun's story was actually interesting too and I would have liked to see it play out longer. At least he and the heroine guy went to the cultural festival together at the end, which is easily construed as romantic when it's just two people. Oh and the ninja girl who talked through a paper bag hand puppet was super cute.

Dear Anemone (02/24, 17 chapters) - fuck you, I liked it. I love dark body horror and this was really interesting despite some jumbled storytelling once the secondary characters were introduced. Probably would have seen more success in a different magazine... or I'm just coping hard. MC-kun was also totally in love with the Best Friend Guy that he admired so much and no one can convince me otherwise.

Kyokuto Necromance (04/24, 18 chapters) - I feel bad for this author. I liked Aliens Area too, and it breaks my heart that he sounded so defeated in his final author's comments when this got cancelled. I hope he tries again because he has good ideas and characters- they just need more time to get off the ground than WSJ typically allows.

Psych House (05/24, 17 chapters) - it was cute and I read it to the end, but it was deservedly cut short for being boring as hell most of the time. I hated the little scientist girl with every fibre of my being too which didn't help since she was a recurring character. I think there were only one or two chapters I actually enjoyed and I kept reading mostly because Nemuru (bucket kid) was a really well-done portrayal of autism. Just read the chapters where MC-chan's friends stalk her and Bucket-kun around town and the one where they go out shopping for pajamas for Bucket-kun. They're the best and only really worthwhile parts of this series (not even MC-chan's drama with her mom was compelling despite the very solid premise).

Yokai Buster Murakami (06/24, 21 chapters) - knew this wasn't for me right away, and seems like a lot of Japanese readers agreed. The jokes in the first three chapters weren't particularly funny or unique so I dropped it pretty fast. Everyone who thought it was "safe" because it was in the last slot as a comedy series probably shouldn't make bets or predictions in 2025.

Finished Series

Boku no Hero Academia (07/14, 430 chapters) - I think this is the last manga of it's kind in WSJ. The end of this series means an end to the mindset of extending a popular series until it runs out of steam (One Piece is a completely different beast in it's own league). All the big hit series in recent times like JJK and KnY were allowed to tell faster, shorter stories and Kagurabachi -the next mega-hit in waiting- is poised to challenge it's predecessor's speed run statistics. But I don't think BnHA overstayed it's welcome despite dropping it a few times due to lack of interest over the years. I have issues with the execution on main themes, how certain powers were handled, and the ending felt too rushed but it really wasn't a bad series at the end of the day. It deserved the popularity and I'll be interested if the author starts up something new. Shout out to Deku and Ochako for not being a horrible couple too- they had some genuine chemistry between them, which is unusual for a WSJ series.

Jujutsu Kaisen (03/18, 271 chapters) - I'm freeeeeee. Only slightly jesting. I feel bad for the author since he was in poor health by the end and clearly just wanted to end it, but I don't miss waiting to see how a fight turned out. JJK did that thing I dislike where characters biff and bam around a battlefield for eons without significant character development, so I read it in bursts instead of weekly until the last arc. The explanations of powers was clunky, some significant plot points weren't sufficiently followed up on for my tastes (mostly around Yuuji and his "brothers")... it was a bit of a mess of a manga but the ideas the author was trying to express were very good. I love how Yuuji got through to Megumi in the end, and what Megumi wished for, how Gojo saw himself, the blatant SatoSugu stuff, the idiot twins dynamic between Yuuji and Nobara- there was a lot of excellence in this series that got hampered by the sub-par battles. I hope Gege can rest and come back if he's still interested in doing so.

Cipher Academy (11/22, 58 chapters) - this ran a little too long to say it was "axed" but it was definitely cut shorter than the author intended. I like Nisioisin for more than his Monogatari Series stuff and I was hoping this would would stay longer, but alas. Iroha was great and I loved the unsexualized, un-haremized(?) female cast that surrounded him. I was too stupid to follow most of the codes and puzzles but that didn't stop me from checking in every week to see what went down. I also have the deepest respect for the various people who translated this series every week because it was absolute hell for them to do it even with some extra time afforded. Doing a good Nisioisin series translation without a book's worth of TL notes is already a feat, never mind trying to translate one involving tons of Japanese-language specific cryptograms and puzzles.

Limbo Series

Mission: Yozakura Family (08/19, 256+ chapters) - I'll admit I've never read this. All I know is that the jokes of it being so middling that it gets forgotten in every type of list are true because I also almost forgot to put it here. Apparently it's ending soon, so I hope the fans of it get a satisfying conclusion.

Undead Unluck (01/20, 236+ chapters) - I read this for a bit, dropped it, and don't remember why so I guess it wasn't worth following after all. Not to say it's bad, just not my speed I guess. Another series that's ending soon so I hope it goes out on a high note for the people who like it.

Kill Blue (04/23, 83+ chapters) - I tried to like this one, I really did. But I think the author would do better to stick to gay sports series that aren't golf. The premise was iffy for me but I was willing to roll with it until everything got bogged down in the haunted house arc and I dropped it out of boredom. The only notable thing this series has done done is daughterzone the middle school girl to the mid-40's(?) MC, which shouldn't be a relief but, y'know. It's not selling too hot so we'll see how long the author can coast off of the mega success of his Magical Gay Basketball series and the general lack of strong competition for spots in WSJ right now.

Nue's Exorcist (05/23, 80+ chapters) - never read this because I'm not into ecchi harem battle manga, but hope it's satisfying the people who do like it. Also not doing stellar in sales but it's not in a lot of danger either.

New Additions Still Running

Super Psychic Policeman Chojo (02/24, 44+ chapters) - I was a fan of Samon the Summoner so I gave this a chance, but it's too skewed towards referential comedy for my tastes. I do love this author's scumbag MCs though. It's not doing great or terrible in sales (for a comedy series) so far, so it's anyone's guess how long it'll last. It won't be overtaking Roboco any time soon though. Hope the Kochikame collab next issue gives it a boost to close the gap a little just because I like the author.

Astro Royale (04/24, 35+ chapters) - I was intrigued and willingly following along with this until chapter 8, at which point I dropped it like a shit-covered brick. The really unfunny transphobic "jokes" about a femme bad guy and dated gender role BS for the sister that was introduced have blacklisted this author for me forever. I don't care how much I liked the rest of the supporting cast, I don't care if the author writes a series that sells a billion copies with a single volume- I'm never going to give him a chance again unless he makes an effort to improve on how he treats women and trans people in his works (as if he'd care, I know). It's another series that isn't doing great in sales but probably isn't going to be axed imminently because it's still selling better than other stuff.

Ultimate Exorcist Kiyoshi (06/24, 26+ chapters) - please read this, it's got so much heart and soul! It's definitely not a perfect series -the action's nothing to write home about and the story isn't original- but the characters are top-tier and this author knows how to play with reader expectations. It feels like an earnest love letter to the essence of shounen manga that's just about found it's footing with the most recent chapters. Kiyoshi's in the same boat as Astro in terms of sales- not great, but it's being given room to see if it grows or treads water. I hope it grows because this is a joy to read almost every week.

Hima-Ten! (07/24, 24+ chapters) - the best way I can describe this after dropping it at chapter 2 is "ToraDora for people who don't want to read ToraDora in [current year]". Unfortunately I don't want to see ecchi of high school girls, so the panty shot in the second chapter made it clear this series isn't for me. It goes in the bin of "hope it does well for the target audience" titles. It's seeing some modest success, but it's got a long way to go if it wants to reach the same tier as Nisekoi and BokuBen (We Never Learn).

Ichi the Witch (09/24, 16+ chapters) - I trust the Iruma author with my life, and the artist also being a woman helped me believe that this wouldn't be a male power fantasy series despite the premise. So far it's delivered with phenomenal art and characters and a story that's just interesting enough to keep it in my mind. I do appreciate the author and artist's intentional additions of diversity through Desscaras (best girl no contest) and what could be some trans femme and/or gender non-conforming folks in a position of power. Will be looking to see how volume 1 sales fare when it comes out early next year. WSJ wants this to be a hit with the billing it gets already, though, so I hope it meets expectations!

Shinobi Undercover (09/24, 15+ chapters) - I'm honestly not sure how to feel about this series. The MC is fun to follow, and I like the main girl well enough, but it feels like this series isn't sure how to strike a balance between action and romcom plot beats. I think if it doesn't hit it's stride soon it could be in trouble. Happy to be wrong even if I end up dropping it though!

Hakutaku (09/24, 14+ chapters) - this is dead in the water and it kind of deserves to be. It's cute but there's not much else to say about it since it glosses over the interesting bits of game development and goes for emotional and cool moments that it doesn't build up enough to earn. I think the author has a passion for indie game dev but it's just not coming across that well with all the yapfests and skimming the technical bits. Then again, I'm a tech person that gets annoyed when my hobby/career/interest is simplified for non-tech people in ways I don't like, so... maybe I'm just elitist? Either way, I don't see this making it out of the U19 club with how poorly it's been doing in surveys and rankings. RIP hope the author isn't discouraged and I'll see this one out to the end.

Syd Craft: Love is a Mystery (11/24, 6+ chapters) - Bit too early to say how this one's faring, but it seems like a competent romcom. It's not a genre I like most of the time so I won't be reading further than chapter 4 but surely the BokuBen author will have another banger with this. Surely. I do like the MC at least. But it doesn't seem like it will satisfy anyone who wants actual mysteries to solve- it's a series that's firmly planted in the romcom territory while using Sherlock Holmes aesthetics for comedy.

Safe Series

One Piece (07/97, 1134+ chapters) - what is there to say about a legend? It's the face of the magazine and feels like it will be around forever despite Oda saying he wants to end it at some point. I don't have it in me to catch up with it but I respect the hell out of this series for it's popularity and longevity.

Me and Roboco (07/20, 215+ chapters) - I feel like too many jokes are lost in translation to fully appreciate this as someone who really only understands English, sadly. But it has an impressive run for a comedy series and shows no signs of slowing down any time soon. If your series gets a Roboco parody, you know you've made it.

Sakamoto Days (11/20, 195+ chapters) - the action never fails to disappoint! Even if the story gets boring at points, there's always some killer art to look forward to. I'm also really digging the current arc so it's good vibes all around for this series right now. Just wish the author could decide on how far he wants to stretch realism when it comes to people's assassin techniques. It's got an anime airing in the 2025 Winter season so I hope that brings in new fans (and has good direction and animation, which is vital to sell those stunning action scenes).

The Elusive Samurai (01/21, 185+ chapters) - I'll admit it, this is a series that I'm not worldly enough to appreciate. Historical fiction is a tough sell to me to begin with and being bombarded with completely unfamiliar names, locations, and events every chapter left me feeling pretty lost. I stuck with it for a while just because I liked AssClass and Neuro so much but I had to admit defeat around chapter 60 or so. Maybe the anime would be easier to digest?

Witch Watch (02/21, 184+ chapters) - dropped it early on since it's a romcom, but it seems cute and is doing well so I hope it stays successful for it's fans. Anime soon!

Blue Box (04/21) - I liked the one-shot and the author deserves all the success from the little I've read of this. Again, not my genre, but glad to see it doing well. Hope the anime is a hit too!

Akane-banashi (02/22, 140+ chapters) - easily would be #1 for me if not for a certain edgy sword manga. The art, the story, the characters- everything comes together perfectly to weave a compelling narrative that is absolutely an odd fit for WSJ, but enriches the magazine for being present. Everyone needs to read this series! It's crazy how consistently amazing it is! You don't have to know a thing about rakugou to get invested and fall in love. The current arc in particular has been 10/10 chapters for months now and I can't recommend it enough!

*Ruri Dragon (06/22, 26+ chapters) - another "not my thing" series- I tried it before it went on hiatus and it's alright, apparently very good for people who like Slice of Life and cozy coming-of-age stories. Glad the author's feeling better and is able to keep going.

Kagurabachi (09/23, 63+ chapters) - ...do I need to say anything? I don't write hundreds of thousands of words for any series but this one. It took over my brain and I've been completely enthralled for months now- it quite literally occupies almost every waking thought. Much like Akane-banashi, all the core elements come together in an incredibly satisfying way that makes it a must-read for fans of the genre it belongs to. The action is stellar, the characters are phenomenal, the story is blisteringly fast but still being competently told for the most part, and the way sensitive topics are handled should be held up as a model for other authors to follow. If you only read one manga in WSJ, you're missing out. But make it Kagurabachi.

*Digital Exclusive (not printed in the physical magazine)

Hiatus x Hiatus

Hunter x Hunter (03/98, 410+ chapters) - I love this series, I really do. Togashi's the only author who can get me to read his novel when I signed up for a manga. I always look forward to it's return and I hope the author's health holds up long enough for him to end it in a way he's happy with. Re-reading the current arc in full when it's finished will be a fun few week's worth of political gamesmanship!

Overall Thoughts

The magazine's in an interesting period of transition right now. Many of the new series launched this year aren't generating a lot of buzz, big and middling series have ended or are ending soon, and the near-future age demographics in Japan pose some serious questions about what WSJ will do to adapt and keep selling.

The magazine is nowhere close to being in dire straits, to be clear. WSJ is more of a publication for all ages that has a lot of appeal to 12-17 year old boys at it's core. But that demographic is shrinking while the aging population grows. I think this is why the magazine is experimenting with more mature series like Kagurabachi and Chainsaw Man from a few years back- they know they can't keep the same raw sales numbers up if they rely on the core demographic as much as they used to.

The dearth of mainstay mega-hits compared to years past is also why some series like Kiyoshi and Astro are being given more grace than if they had ran a few years earlier. Neither series is doing great in terms of volume sales, but they're not obviously unpopular enough to be easy axes for something with more potential. They have breathing room for as long as there needs to be more action/battle manga in the lineup and nothing more promising comes along. They're safer than ever with Undead Unluck and Yokozora ending soon too.

If we're talking mega-hits in the making -JJK and BnHA replacements- then the only clear option right now is Kagurabachi. This isn't to put my favourite series up on a pedestal! It's just that, historically, the WSJ series that get the most attention and recognition are action series. When people think of WSJ "pillars" they think of the battle series even if a romcom is outselling everything but One Piece (happened this month with Blue Box coming in #2 for volume sales of WSJ titles).

I think Ichi the Witch can find success but it's the only one out of everything that's been released this year that I have any significant faith in, to be honest. I want Kiyoshi to do well and keep going, but it's not exactly "hit" material right now and the volume sales reflect that. Everything else is too early to say or already not doing so hot for WSJ standards.

I think this could be an opportunity for experimentation. WSJ has had a pretty consistent lineup of an ecchi series, a romcom, some comedy, a drama/mystery here and there, and a lot of action. Adding pure Slice of Life series like Ruri Dragon and Psych House shows a desire to branch out in my opinion. The success of a pure drama series with a female protagonist in Akane-banashi is also encouraging. I would definitely like to see more genres! Maybe even a proper horror series...?! I'll be looking at the new 2025 serials with a keen eye for any new trends. Maybe in a few years we'll have the "pillars" be something other than only action manga!

Alrighty, that's a wrap. Thank you if you read this and I hope 2025 is good to you. May we all find a new manga series to fall in love with! And may it survive the axe!

#weekly shounen jump #I am not tagging every series in this post that would be ridiculous #Out of the 30 some-odd series I'm reading the top two are in WSJ #Akane-banashi and Kagurabachi really are something special #Surely I'm not the only person who lives in spreadsheets for the love of the game

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sleepyhead0720 · 2 years ago

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LUFFY X READER, just some fluff maybe luffy has a bad day or the reader can't focus on a book and it's frustrating them and they go to just chill out with luffy.

Hi! Tysm for requesting! I hope you liked it!

Book problems

The crew stopped at an island that had a town library, you decided to go with Robin while Luffy was asleep

You actually got really into a book series and read four books while being in the library

When you left, you took a thick book to read whenever you were bored because tbh there wasn’t really much stuff you could do when you weren’t on land

“Y/n! Y/n!”

You heard Luffy behind you as he hugged you from behind.

“Wanna explore the island with me?? There’s a all you can eat somewhere there!!”

You chuckled, he looked super excited

But you couldn’t go since you had to pay off Nami’s debt by doing chores around the ship

“Sorry Luffy, but I have to stay today, once I’m done maybe I’ll go!”

He looked disappointed

“Whyyyyy? Please! It’ll be quick! I promise!”

He said as he tried to drag you out of the ship

“Sorry lu I already made plans”

He frowned

“If I get my chores done I promise I’ll go with you but for right now I can’t”

He stayed silent

“Promise?”

“Promise”

He’s face lit up as he gave you a peck on the cheek

“Ok! I’ll just go get usopp! If you finish early I’ll be at the buffet!”

You smiled as you watched him go get usopp

/——————————————————————-\

It had been a couple hours since Luffy left, you were done with your chores but didn’t wanna disturb Luffy while he was with usopp since the two needed some catching up to do

So you decided to read the book you got.

As time passed you realized you just couldn’t focus on it, you wanted something a little more exciting then a book.

After some thinking you finally decided to leave the ship

“Nami! I did all of my chores! I’m going to find Luffy now!”

You decided to go to the buffet first since he said he’d be there

Once you couldn’t find him there, you decided to look for him in the forest since he usually goes there first.

Suddenly you heard someone or something in the bushes

You immediately turned around to find Luffys head poking out of the grass

He smiled widely at you

“You came!”

He got up to hug you

“Yea, I got bored in the ship so I came to find you, where’s usopp?” You asked, he was still hugging you and inhaling your scent. “We found a workshop before we even got to the buffet so usopp stayed there but I just didn’t wanna wait so I headed to the forest since I wanted to go with someone there” you smiled as he pulled away

“Well wanna go to that buffet now?”

He nodded excitedly

You grabbed his hand and started running at the direction of the buffet as he followed behind excitedly

You two really missed the other’s presence more then your realized

|———————————————————————|

Sorry if it didn’t come out as you wanted it to!

I hope you enjoyed<3

#one piece #one piece x you #one piece x y/n #one piece x reader #monkey d luffy #Luffy x reader #Luffy x you #luffy x y/n #luffy fluff #luffy one piece

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solarsonicsoda · 8 months ago

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Rating 500+ Theme Tunes - #18: X-Men: Evolution

There's more than one X-Men show you know! X-Men: Evolution is the 2000s take on the mutant team, and it looks shockingly different just a few years later! This show started in 2000, what's with the large shift in resolution? But this new take follows some familiar mutants and some newer faces as they balance life with their heroic ways. Where the original show had the likes of Jubilee and Gambit, Evolution has Nightcrawler and Shadowcat. It's X-Men for an all new generation!

As I said, this show began in 2000 and ran to 2003, primarily as part of the Warner Bros. line-up. But it was aired as recently as 2011 on Disney XD, which is wild for a show that I feel isn't ridiculously well remembered. Good for them! You'll have to let me know if this was a classic in your household though, because it seems like one of many superhero shows of the time.

As may be implied, I was not really familiar with this show. However, I really like the way it looks! I like the art style and the animation I saw through this intro looked pretty expressive! Is this show good? Again, all my X-Men: Evolution fans will have to let me know. It seems nice, and I'd be interested in checking it out sometime. I miss the super 90s vibes, but I like the super 2000s vibes too! Let's get to the theme!

X-Men: Evolution Theme Song

I actually think this is a really sound theme! I think it maintains that cool, mysterious vibe of the original show, but with a totally different sound! Big fan of the guitar riffs and the little rises and falls of it! I don't know what you call that! It's not exactly a transcendent theme, but I think it's a really solid and fun superhero theme! Just the right style to hype me up for some fantastical action and fun! Another good song!

A theme that draws from what came before it whilst doing its own thing, even if it's nothing out of this world. I enjoy it a good deal, so I think this one is gonna earn a B!

Stay tuned for more and be sure to send in any suggestions for other shows you'd like to see done (after the 500 already in the pipeline that is). Check out the intro to this series here, and check out the tier list.

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mermaidsirennikita · 12 days ago

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ARC REVIEW: Miss Thornfield's Daring Bargain by Addy Du Lac

4/5. Releases 3/20/25.

—brother's best friend

—historical romance that isn't all about standard issue caucasians

—nooooooooooo don't grow up and turn into a sexy person my honor can't take it

—marriage of convenience

Heat Index: 6.5/10

The Basics:

Ada was supposed to have a fun season; unfortunately, her brother Richard just had to go missing, and now she needs his friend Basil's help to find him and save her future. But like, the easiest way to do this is obviously to marry Basil. They can always get an annulment once they've completed the mission? Right? Right? Riiiiiight?

The Review:

If there's one word I can use to describe Addy Du Lac's approach to historicals, it's "charming". She writes with a light hand in a manner that mixes the modern and the classic.

Which, speaking of, this is obviously going to get comparisons to Bridgerton because it's a diverse historical romance (Ada and Richard are of Chinese descent on their mother's side; but they're not alone, and Du Lac has tended towards diversity in her historicals so far, which is lovely). But Miss Thornfield's Daring Bargain is more rooted in reality, which means Ada does racism, and the world in which she lives isn't the postracial utopia that is Netflix's Bridgerton. As a disclaimer, I'm a white woman, and I can't speak as to how well Ada and Richard work as representation; nor can I speak much as to how race is handled in this book in general. I can say that it seemed well done to me, and I find Du Lac's approach to diversity in historical romances preferable to what Bridgerton does. It's never super heavy, but it does feel more... aware? A midpoint between harsh reality and "nothing wrong ever happens anymore it's fine don't worry about it".

Like, don't get me wrong. This is a fun, frothy book. And it know what the reader wants. When Basil gets all hot and bothered on waking up to Ada being just A Little Too Close? Delightful. His general dismay at her not being a skinny little girl anymore? Hell yeah. That's what we're here for. I don't know if they necessarily like... desperately needed to get married to find Richard? But to be real, the fact that they were like "Seems legit, I'm sure an annulment will be easy" made it more fun for me.

But Basil, bro—if you're gonna get this thing annulled, you kinda need to NOT bang her. Just a note. I know it's challenging.

If there's one thing I can say, it's that Basil and Ada are both genuinely kind people whose relationship progresses fairly quickly, in part because they are nice people. Really, why shouldn't they be together? They're nice and they're hot. Let's do this. Du Lac writes lovely people in a lovely way, and I do enjoy it; but I'd kind of like to see her writing people who are a bit harder to enjoy in the future. Not constantly, write your heartsong, but as a treat?

Like I said, Ada and Richard aren't the only people of color in this novel, and I look forward to seeing the stories of Ada's friends, also biracial women, down the road. This was a fun setup for what looks like a romp of a series, and I'm very interested to see what comes next.

The Sex:

While it takes a bit for Basil and Ada to fully give in, when they do—well, Du Lac writes a good sex scene. It's nothing super over the top, but the connection between Basil and Ada is palpable, and I was very "good for Her" TM about it.

Conclusion:

Any historical romance fans looking for something on the lighter side will definitely like this. And frankly, I'm always happy to see historical authors who branch away from the usual cast of white characters. While this is very classic in some ways, it branches out in others, and I had a good time!

Thanks to Addy Du Lac, Dragonblade, and NetGalley for providing me with a copy of this book. All thoughts and opinions are my own.

#romance novel blogging #romance novels #book recs #books #arc reviews #netgalley #book reviews #romance reviews

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miyoron · 3 months ago

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Anime of Note 2024 Edition

Hello hello, it's 2024 end of the year so I'm throwing out my usual anime garbage! As always, these are in the order I watched and remember things, how great and well organized I am!

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Past Write Ups

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Freiren

Frieren was one I actually started watching last year but it's definitely one of my favorites I watched through the beginning of the year. The story is very simple: we follow an elf from a heroic party that defeated a demon king and join her many many years after her original journey. Frieren is not very good at socializing or picking up on the cues involved with them. It all comes with the territory of being a long lived race perhaps. Or Frieren is just that awkward of an elf, who can say.

The show is very nicely animated and the cast is super fun too. Fern and Frieren's dynamic is very fun, and so is good boy Stark. I enjoyed all the fun little expressions, even when it's something as simple as a pout or a "nyoron" ass look of disappointment. The show is soothing and a little melancholy given the subject matter, but there's also action in between to go along with it. It's enjoyable to see Frieren going through her journey to meet up with her old party member Himmel, even if she's more than content to take as much time as she pleases to get there. Sometimes that means getting stuck in a Mimic's grasp and crying about how dark it is. Frieren is a good time, highly recommended.

Dungeon Meshi

I wrote about Dungeon Meshi the manga on a previous year's list, and now it's out in anime form! By Trigger no less! The show is pretty much everything I could have asked for, except being trapped in Netflix jail which means I probably won't be able to get a bluray of it which is stupid. Actually the only thing it's missing from the manga is the stat readouts of the food when it's completed.

But again, Dungeon Meshi/Delicious in Dungeon is a manga about an adverturing party returning to the mysterious dungeon where they're trying to get back a beloved party member who was eaten by the Red Dragon that took them all out. They don't have enough money for supplies though so they must learn to live off the dungeon itself by cooking and eating the monsters within. With help from a new dwarven party member, who's very used to cooking these things, they venture forth!

Dungeon Meshi is really good still and I'd recommend both the manga and anime. I even went to a Dungeon Meshi collab cafe on my Japan trip this year. Can't wait for season 2.

Happiness Charge Precure

If you've been keeping up with these lists, you'd know every year me and my friend Cheapsteaks have been watching minimum 1 old Precure series. Well this year we made it to the final old show, Happiness Charge. Going in, I've been told a lot of bad things about this one, that it's one of the worst and all. Of course worst by Precure standards still usually has something in it I enjoy? And I'd agree that it was not one of my favorite seasons but atleast it has Hime who gives it more good will than it probably should have.

The villains are pretty silly too, I love a doofus trio though they're nowhere near as fun as say the Smile dorks. It's not a bad little season but I can definitely see why it's not held in as high regards as the others. Blue just sucks like…a whole lot. But I guess what can you expect from religion right? Also the fact that he has atleast 2 underage girls with a crush on him is awkward and bad. You suck Blue, get outta here. Again, atleast there's Hime who kinda carries the whole show on her dumb noises and faces.

Ojomajo Doremi

In absence of another older Precure, we have now broken the glass on the Doremi option and have now latched ourselves to this series for the next 4 years. Ojomajo Doremi is the story of a young girl, the unluckiest pretty girl in the world, who wants to become a witch. With good luck, she's able to meet a real one! Unfortunately, that means the witch's secret is out and she's been transformed into a witch frog. Good work Doremi. Thanks to this, Doremi has to work at the witch's magical shop as an apprentice until she can turn her back. Doremi is a cute little show with fun characters. You have annoying little sister Pop, nerdy and laughs at dumb joks Hazuki, tomboy and street smart Aiko and celebrity and pro hater Onpu. I also love Doremi's little faerie DoDo (stupidest faeries need the MOST care).

The series is very silly but throws in some episodes that are actually really heart felt in there and are like man, that's pretty deep show for babies. The fact a major plot point of Aiko's is living in a divorced family feels like something you don't see much in magical girl shows to be honest. Anyway, the Ojomajos are fun and we have begun season 2 already where now Doremi has to raise a witch baby because the Witch Queen cannot be assed to herself.

Wonderful Precure

Dog Precure! The dog Precure is here! I think Wonderful has easily been one of my favorite Precures in recent memory, maybe because it feels different than most of them. Usually you get the thing where Precures are just kicking and punching the bejesus out of dumb monsters before purifying them and letting people get their dreams back or something. Well this time you can't really do that because these monsters of the day are usually corrupted animals and that would be just mean. So the fact the cures have to basically calm them down and be gentle/smart about it is a welcome new angle.

The main cast in this one is really solid too. You have Iroha, who is our usual good girl who just wants to do her best, who is accompanied by her dog Komugi who is a dog. Her character is dog and it rules because it causes so many random issues by her suddenly talking in public. There's Mayu, the new girl in town who is socially awkward, especially when she is hyper focused on something like knitting a gift for a friend and you have her cat Yuki. Yuki's character is cat, so she is aloof but loves Mayu best of all and will murder for her. The secondary cast is good too and has Satoru who is the nerdy friend who helps out but he's the first one of those who I don't think is a twerp in any way (not like Syrup, you suck Syrup). He also has Daifuku who is his bunny who is just hyper chill. Wonderful Precure rules and they even got a crossover episode set with Shin Chan where both characters got to be on the others' shows.

Wan-derful!

Oshi no Ko Season 2

Oshi no Ko was pretty good this year, I liked the continuation of last season, even if the opening song was not as good. I really enjoyed getting to see the exploration into both Aqua and Kana's past experiences that made them act how they do today. I also just liked watching the characters put on the play amidst the drama inside of it. Plays within a play are usually fun and I liked the designs of the characters in that play, and the original manga creator's design too. I guess I like the designs of a lot of the things in this show most of all which is kind of what drew me too it initially. Season 2 needed more Mem-cho though.

Girls Band Cry

Girls Band Cry is a wonderful little show that Toei didn't want us to watch it felt like. Sure, the graphics are a bit janky but I think that gives it a fun style all its own and they can get pretty expressive to be honest. Following the trials and tribulations of little anger gremlin Nina as she tries to find herself in the world was a good, if sometimes painful, time. Forming a band with Momoka, the former lead in a band that sang the song that changed her life, leads to all sorts of adventures. Like learning what the middle finger is and then making your OWN middle finger too.

This show probably had one of my favorite opening songs of the year, just really good at getting you pumped up. I also liked the cast a lot, all my ladies love Rupa and you can't deny it. Like it's a hard one to write about cuz it's one where it's like "no I like this one. It was good and the chars are good." I don't know what else you want from me.

Bang Dream! It's MYGO!!!!!

Another girl band anime, this one was actually from last year but I just got to it this year. The story of a girl who collects rocks outside the school yard and all the sea creature band-aids that she can and how she manages to get girls who all wanna be in her band. Honestly, I don't know what all to say with this one, it made me feel sad when the characters were sad and I felt happy when they were happy. Also Raana is here and I was amused any time she did anything..or any time she just left cuz she thought everyone was being boring women. Raana is good.

Mayonaka Punch

When I was visiting Japan, I saw an episode of this and we were intrigued by it since…couldn't really understand it fully being non-subs. Coming back and putting it into my weekly rotation though, I'm glad I did. The character designs in this one are also really top notch, I like Live and Fu's a lot. Plus the thought of a streamer who got kicked out of her group for knocking the shit out of one of the other members having to start a whole new channel with a bunch of moron vampires is great.

Also this show is pretty gay and that usually gets you some points on my end. Is it a bias? Sure. Will it stop me from saying I like it? You bet your ass it won't. It's a cute little show with some good jokes and even some good dramatic moments too. You really want Live to get the blood she so desires and you want Masaki to hit a million subs! Also it helped me with memorizing kanji for my college course because one quiz had "mayonaka" on it so thanks anime!

Ranma 1/2

Ranma is a series that has long been a part of my anime history. It was one of the first ones I rented from the video store back in the day, and one of the first ones I downloaded to watch episodes in the early days of file sharing servers. So the fact they remade it and did it so well is awesome. It's a lot more like the manga and even retains a lot of the original cast for some of the most important characters. And those who are newer cast are super great too like Tomokazu Sugita as Kunou and Aoi Yuuki as Azusa. If you liked old Ranma, I guarantee you will enjoy this new one.

Seriously it's just so good to see these old shows I have nostalgia for getting GOOD remakes. It's been fun watching with friends and seeing how they animate it all. Seeing something that inspired a lot of my creative endeavors through the years is enjoyable too because…not gonna lie I got a lot of my dumb character ideas thanks to Ranma. Can't wait for season 2, Rumiko Takahashi rules.

Dan da Dan

This one is one I came a bit late to and I can understand why some would be a bit wary on it. The first episode is understandably intense with a situation in it and I would not fault anyone for not wanting to continue because of that. Scene aside though, everything after has been good and has honestly some of the most fun cast I've seen in a shounen series in a while. Everyone is equal parts smart and dumbass and they're often just screaming about dumb shit at each other. I really love it. Also Momo's fit is on point at all times pretty much. Also it's by Science Saru so like..hell yea you know?

It's a fun show, I think it has good character designs and a fun set up with fighting against both spooky spirits and fucked up aliens. The cast are all likable idiots and we get more next year so..yay!

Jellyfish Can't Swim in the Night

A lot of parts of this series definitely made me think of my own struggles with regards to creative things. I have often run into times where I just do not like what I draw so a lot of Mahiru's struggles hit close to home. I've never outright hated my work but it's a very relatable feeling and I think this series touches on it well. The show is a fun little series, sometimes dramatic, often cute with girls forming an online band and tryin to show the world that they can do it on their own.

From cool vibes former idol Kano to strongest vtuber and gender gremlin Kiui, I really enjoyed a lot of the characters and their arcs in this one. There's even a fun side character who is a mom in her 30s still trying to make it as an idol (her daughter is her biggest fan). It's really fun and the music is good too and the visuals and designs are really fun. I would definitely recommend it if you ever feel like you're in a creative slump of your own.

Love Live Superstar!! Season 3

This year we had the third, and presumably final, season of the Liella cast. We got to meet up with the new cast members, former rival Margarete, and younger Onitsuka sister Tomari. It starts with an interesting premise of Kanon leaving Liella to form her own side group with the newer girls, something Chisato is okay with because she feels it'll make both sides stronger. It's an interesting way to start, delaying the pay off of them teaming up that everyone watching (and all the other students) is waiting for.

There's a lot of fun little side stories here, getting to explore Natsumi and Tomari's relationship, some amusing little bits with Shiki and Mei, and even a trip to Shanghai. It's nice seeing them all again, even if part of me kind of wishes the other shows got 3 seasons too, but I'll take it. We even got giant isopod costume again so, overall I'd say a win!

Here are some little side things that one was a movie and one is just dumb. I hope you enjoy.

Uma Musume Pretty Derby: Beginning of a New Era

This is a movie that Cheapsteaks and I watched on a Friday night in an empty theater in Heiwajima this summer. We had 0 subtitles but it's not like it was a hard plot to follow. This was a fun time and I'm putting it on here more for the experience than the content but I had a blast with this movie.

Special Deer Award: My Deer Friend Nokotan

Nokotan, you did it. Seriously, that opening song is an ear worm. Or a deer worm. Deer tick?

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So that's it! That's anime for the year! Did I spell check this? Not really! Do you or I care? Probably not!

Happy new year! Try to keep it safe and fight on! As Nox Ryugasaki says "Goodbye sekai!"

#anime of the year list garbage that we all love

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paullovescomics · 5 months ago

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DC round-up for this week! I did not get Absolute Superman because it was already sold out when I got to the comic shop. It was noon or even slightly early, but it was still sold out. So i'll have to wait for the next printing.

Batgirl #1 is a solid start. Lady Shiva shows up in Gotham to tell Batgirl that some evil super ninjas are out to kill them, and they need to work together to survive. Cass is understandably reticent about teaming up with her evil mom. They have a well written back-and-forth about it. Batgirl's taciturn nature is conveyed very well. Mom and daughter are at an impasse, but nothing ends an argument like a bunch of sword-wielding mfers crashing through the window. This was very good. The characters are on point. The fight scenes are exactly what you want in a martial arts inspired superhero comic. I first noticed Takeshi Miyazawa's art like twenty years ago when it was much more manga-like. That influence is still there, but the line weights and types are a lot more varied now. Poses, storytelling, and facial expressions are excellent.

Birds of Prey #15 also prominently features Batgirl. She's undercover here, infiltrating an evil company that has abducted several Amazons. Things don't go well for Cass' mission, but she badasses her way through it. There's a line where Black Canary says that Cass is everyone's favorite in every scenario, and I was like, you're fucking right she is. All of the character stuff in this issue is aces. Barda's big lovable violent scary self, Dinah showing top tier leadership chops, Onyx and Grace's instant camaraderie, all great. Onyx is a cool deep cut. I don't know if she's shown up somewhere else recently, but it's cool to see her featured more prominently. The villains in this arc are well done, too. They are smarmy and full of shit in a very big corporate way that rings true. You really want to see them get what's coming to them. Heels are hard to book in 2024, so congrats to Kelly Thompson for that. Consistently one of the comics I most enjoy.

JSA #1 -- I wasn't sure if I'd dig this one or not, but I did. The mix of generations is not new to Justice Society series, but the inclusion of the Infinity, Inc. versions of Wildcat and Doctor Mid-Nite is very welcome. Those two should have been back a long time ago. Plot-wise, this hits the ground running. Many members of the team are missing or in the hospital after a mysterious attack. It's unclear whether this happened in some earlier comic (maybe in the Absolute Power event?) or if the story is just being very in media res about things. Regardless, it wasn't hard to follow. There's a good opportunity here for some of these characters to get more fleshed out, contemporary character development. The team is having a lot of conflict, some of which might seem a bit too ordinary, except that it's due to an imposter in their midst. The last page is out here on tumblr, but I won't give away the details. I'll just say that a conspiracy of villains that is several steps ahead of the good guys is a trope that I will always pop for. Don't believe I've seen artist Diego Olortegui's work before, but I like it. All of the characters look great, the faces are very expressive, everything is clearly told, and dude does not skimp on the backgrounds. Loads of cool stuff here.

I also picked up Jamie McKelvie's One For Sorrow #1, but I haven't read it yet. It looks very cool.

#comics #comic books #superhero #dc comics #comic book cover art #batgirl #birds of prey #jsa #justice society #infinityinc #wednesday spoilers

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graysparrowao3 · 10 months ago

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Heyyooo!

I'm popping in cause i just wanted to let you i really love your stuff and miss seeing you on my dash.(why tumble timeout??) I'm sorry someone felt the need to come at you with unkindness but i bet there's a lot more people who LOVE seeing you roll across their timeline (self included). I love your writing, its super sweet and i adore how you present the characters. I do hope that person didn't dampen your spirits too much, You're a gem!

Helloooo! 💛 This was such a kind thing that you took the time to say, thank you so much. It really, really lifted my spirits and to hear that you enjoy my presence and writing is so touching (and especially as I absolutely adore all your content and posts too!). You're absolute royalty. I'm so glad to actually be able to be back in your presence and respond to you now as well!

I don't know if you remember this post, but in celebration of being freed from Tumblr jail and in gratitude for your kind words, I finally wrote you something based on this prompt. It's just a series of three short scenes but I hope you like it! I'll put it below a cut.

Summary for bonus part 4 of the Rolan, Cal, and Lia sneaking in and out for dates series: Cal and Lia are sneaking around trying to hide their romance liaisons from Rolan, who, unbeknownst to his siblings, already knows about them both...

Words: 1,174

Cal gathered up the usual stack of envelopes, scrolls, and a copy of the latest Baldur’s Mouth that filled the postbox and began to sort through them as he sauntered into the kitchen where his family was seated.

“For the owner of Ramazith’s Tower.” Cal handed an unusual, sealed paper over, then dropped the rest of the assorted junk onto the middle of the table.

Rolan tucked the envelope quickly away.

“Love letter?” Lia teased.

“Not that it would be your business if it was.” Rolan returned the light-hearted tone.

“Just joking,” Lia leaned casually on her shoulders, “but now I’m interested.”

“Never you mind.” Rolan waved her away, taking another bite to break his fast.

“Not that you have to tell us,” Cal settled back onto the table and flipped idly through the Gazette without reading it, “but it would be nice if you found someone.”

“I’m sure it would,” Rolan mumbled, “alas, your curiosity will remain unsatisfied. I promise it is not about my personal affairs.”

“If you say so,” Cal was already distracted by one of the illustrations, dropping crumbs onto the page as he chewed. “Weird thing the other day. Could’ve sworn I was being followed.”

“How’d you figure?” Lia’s brow creased with concern as she placed her drink down.

“Pass that here,” Rolan ignored the conversation and gestured for Cal to hand him the newspaper.

“Not sure exactly. Might’ve been imagining it.” Cal grimaced as he tried to recall, “was probably nothing.”

“Worth checking, though,” his sister insisted.

“I’m sure you’re making a mountain out of a molehill.” Rolan glanced briefly over the top of the page.

“Yeah,” he shrugged, “you’re probably right.”

“Rolan,” Lia pulled down the top of the paper in front of him, “think it’s worth a check – to be sure.”

He opened his mouth, then scoffed, reluctantly agreeing,

“Fine, fine, I’ll check up on it today. I’ve got more than a few favours I can call in. I’ll keep us quite safe, fear not,” he folded the newspaper and tucked it under his arm.

“Thank you, Rolan.”

When they were done and the crumbs cleared and the plates cleaned, Rolan restrained his interest long enough to nonchalantly stroll to his office. Once inside, he quickly applied an Arcane Lock to the door and hurried to the desk, eagerly taking out the envelope and opening it with rushed hands. The letter unfolded, finally the favour he’d called in had paid off. He huffed as he read – they could’ve been a little more subtle about it, at least; he wasn't supposed to have been aware of them.

Archmage Rolan – as you wished, please find below the following information regarding the individual that has been seen in the company of your brother. Stand up member of society, as far as I can tell. Boring, honestly. And not that you asked my opinion, but they did seem rather happy in each other’s presence. It was sickening.

No, I didn’t ask, Rolan thought, but he couldn’t help but smile.

Rolan sat, legs and arms crossed. Eyelids falling gently shut before he commanded them to remain open. It would be morning soon. Lia should have been back long ago. His foot tapped restlessly against the floor. Then… a sound. He leant forward in the chair, ears willing it louder. Two sets of poorly concealed footsteps lazily approaching the door outside. He exhaled. At least she was alright. A click in the lock and the door creaked open. With a quick flick of his wrist, Rolan shrouded himself in Invisibility.

An uncharacteristic giggle followed by a soft gasp of excitement. His sister stepped backwards across the threshold,

“Shh,” Lia pressing her finger delicately against her partner’s lips, “lest my brothers hear.”

Rolan raised an eyebrow.

Lia fell back in, replacing her finger with her own lips. She pulled them in close, willing them to step into the tower with her body, hands in their hair. They obliged, their hands on her, searching the edges of her corset, exploring the material tight against her sides, sitting on her hips, teasing at her waist.

Oh, Gods, no. Absolutely not.

A sudden sound caused Lia to pull away. She turned to see a heavy tome that had slammed onto the ground nearby. She crept over and looked around, finding no obvious place where it could have fallen from or been dislodged.

“Tower is Gods damned cursed.” She muttered. She returned to her lover at the door, lacing her arms around their shoulders and pulling them in for a passionate goodbye. Rolan rolled his eyes and shuffled away, grateful to find his bed.

Rolan was enjoying a glass of his favourite red and warming himself by the fireplace after a long day. Long, but rewarding. Honestly, he couldn’t have imagined better, more fulfilling days. He heard the comforting noise of two tieflings moving into the room to join him before the night called to them all.

“I thought we might,” Rolan gestured lazily with his glass, “spend some time together tomorrow evening. Games, drinks, what have you.”

“Tomorrow?” Lia stopped before she made it to a chair, her question tenser than it ought to have been.

“Does it have to be tomorrow, Rolan?” Cal exchanged an uneasy look with her.

“I suppose not, though,” Rolan took a sip of his wine and smiled indulgently into the glass; he’d let them sweat just a little, “what’s the problem with tomorrow?”

“Just…” Cal stumbled, “something else might come up.”

“Might it,” Rolan raised an amused eyebrow.

“I just mean, there was something going on, maybe. I’m not sure. Better to be free for it than not.”

“Is that so,” he took another sip, enjoying himself immensely.

“All got our secrets,” Lia crossed her arms defiantly, “don’t ask you about yours.”

“I think you’ll find you do,” Rolan waved his goblet, “all the Gods damned time, actually.”

“Fine, have it your way.” Lia said, wishing she didn’t sound as disappointed as she did.

“No, no, by all means, do have your mysterious plans tomorrow. I’m sure I’ll figure it out sooner rather than later.”

“Don’t know about that,” Cal relaxed.

“You are many things, dear brother, but a master detective is not one.”

“Is that so?” Rolan’s smug smile loosened by the wine.

“Not saying you’re not good at other things,” Cal added, quickly.

“Just that you’re not always the most insightful. That can’t be news to you.”

“Oh, I don’t know,” Rolan swirled the claret liquid around the class, “I might have picked up a thing or two over the years.”

“Go on then,” Cal tempted him, “if we’re hiding something, what is it?”

“Let me guess,” Rolan feigned ignorance, “a friend I might disapprove of – someone from the guild, perhaps? Or perhaps an unwise game of chance in someone’s basement somewhere.”

Cal and Lia shared a cheeky look.

“Yeah,” they settled into the chairs beside him, “something like that.”

“You see,” he relaxed back, a smile of contentment on his face, “I’m sure I wouldn’t have a clue.”

#bg3 rolan #rolan #rolan bg3 #cal #lia #bg3 cal #cal bg3 #lia bg3 #bg3 lia

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