#i pushed myself a lot with this im kind of worried it doesn’t make any sense at all
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rameiixo · 1 month ago
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UNDERNEATH THE FLOOR (TA-RA-TA)
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seriouslysam8 · 2 years ago
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Hey Sam, I love love love Brumous so far and I can’t wait to read more. I know things are going to get more dark and I hope this isn’t asking for any spoilers but how dark is everything going to get? I guess what I’m trying to ask you is if the death eaters will be sa the Hogwarts students? As someone who went through that at a very very young age I can’t read stories have those story lines for obvious reasons. I’m usually good at looking out for tags or warnings, but I thought I could handle it with one particular fic and let’s just say it was a downward spiral. It was my fault and not the writers in any way, I think I thought I was stronger and better and reality really slapped me in the face. I’m a lot better now but I’m trying to be more cautious of what I read or the fics I get invested in because sometimes as a reader you read things that make you uncomfortable because the writer is so good but then you realize that you can’t handle certain plots and it and it takes a toll on you. I would never blame the writer because they usually warn you, but sometimes we think we’re stronger than we actual are. There was one of your fics I had to avoid reading because of the warnings, and I hope this doesn’t come across as rude but I’m afraid to get invested and things becoming really dark in terms of sa with minors. This probably seems like a stupid ask and I’m sorry if it comes across as rude or anything and im probably not explaining myself well, but I hope I was able to ask the question without sounding rude or like an idiot. I really admire your work and I hope you keep gifting us with your amazing writing.
Don’t worry at all, okay? I got you. You’re not the only one who has asked, and I don’t mind at all. I don’t want someone to ever be upset by something I wrote because they were blindsided or tried to push through. I am not offended or upset at all, all right? I would much rather be frank about what will happen in my stories to make people feel comfortable and confident when they read. It’s not at all rude to say you avoided one of my stories. I am just glad I tagged it appropriately for you and I can guess which one you’re talking about.
Short answer: No.
Long answer: I have no interest in writing those kind of scenes with minors. It’s hard for me to read those kind of scenes and most times I will just skip those scenes when I read stories with it. So I totally understand your concern and your desire to avoid it.
I try to tag appropriately and even give a heads up in special author’s notes before the chapter begins. I remember Bell and I deciding how to write the warning for Harry’s throat slicing moment without giving away what happens but also warn people enough to know it’s gruesome and have an idea of what was going to happen.
Now, that being said, it will be dark akin to Backstabber and Bête Noire. There will be death and torture. I’ll do my best to warn people at the beginning of the chapter if there’s something particularly gruesome. If you decide to read and get to one of those chapters where it sounds like it may be too much for you to read, you can always private message me on here and I’d be more than glad to give a summary of the chapter or tell you exactly what POV to avoid or what have you.
I hope that helps!
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anem0sis · 1 year ago
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evolution
Found this note from June 9th. 2018 (3:11 a.m.) that I wrote. It's interesting to see how these relationships, including the one I had with myself, has evolved in that timeframe. Some things in this feel familiar and relevant now, others not so much: Want to delete it from my phone so I'm posting it here:
I’m sad. I’m really sad. And I don’t see a future for me anymore. I haven’t been the same since the accident, or maybe before that. I’m angry, I’m bitter, I’m irritable and I’m sad. Sometimes I want to push everyone away, I don’t want to deal with social drama especially. I don’t want to deal with Mitchell’s emotional turmoil and him making me feel worse than normal with his strange approach to loving me or not loving me or whatever it is he does. I don’t want to listen to him say ew to my ostomy bag, it makes me feel sad and makes me change my thoughts towards the kind of person he is. I don’t want to deal with him telling me I’m overly sensitive and make my emotions seem not valid. I don’t know what happened, but he was there for me through it all for awhile and then a switch flipped. I think he hates me. Or he wants to hate me. I wonder if he was only ever there for me because he had feelings for me, and now his approach has changed because he hates me now. Why can’t he just be here for me as my friend? I want him to be here for me as my friend. He’s my best friend. If I hurt him somehow for not loving him the way he wanted, I can’t apologize for that. Nobody’s entitled to my love. But I just want my friend. We’re all different now though, I guess. It’s been a weird year.
I tell Logan everything, he’s the only one who knows how much I’m hurting, I think. He knows when I’m up at night and I have breakdowns because I tell him. Some detail, but not a full explanation,And he doesn’t act on it, but he has his moments where he shows his care and I think he knows how I’m feeling better than he let’s on. I know sometimes he thinks I’m a nut, and he isn’t empathetic at all but he has his moments and I am appreciative of those moments.  
I really need someone, but nobody’s understands. This has taken 8 months away from me, and so little has happened but nothing has at all. I don’t feel like me anymore, and I want to say I don’t want to die. But I just don’t see a path anymore. I don’t know what to do, I can’t really do anything. I just wait. I’m scared of any more complications and nobody knows what hell im trying to endure. And I can’t work on my social stuff, the drama with Mitchell and anyone else, I can’t because I’m too focused on my sadness and my anger and my fear and I don’t see my future so what’s the point in trying to show people my perspective when they’re too damn stubborn and caught up in their own emotions, too? I don’t want to hurt anyone. Especially my friends.
Lillie and Anna are the femininity I need, I’m not really close with anyone anymore. I’m probably closest with Logan in the sense that we talk everyday. But him and Mitchell mean the world to me. The absolute world. I don’t think I can be as close with anyone as I am with them, they’ve been with me through the roughest time of my life. Idk what Mitchell is going through with me, but all I can hope is it gets resolved. Idk. He doesn’t open up much. I don’t think I can do anything to help, I think he needs to work through it on his own. That’s been a huge concern to me since the accident, I don’t know, he’s my best friend idk what else to say, I don’t want our friendship to end but I feel like it will if whatever is going on doesn’t stop.
But. I don’t want to worry about that right now, I need to worry about healing. Idk if that’s alright with him. I think about where we stand a lot. 
I only have a few people left. 
 I can barely even get words onto a notepad anymore. I’ve been saying so much to everyone but I feel like a broken record and I can’t really express what I’m feeling or not feeling. 
I hate my life. I would hate myself but I don’t know who I am anymore. The only thing I know is I’m terrified. 
I thought I’d stop being terrified after that night, but the fear has just increased. I’m so unstable. My emotions are a rollercoaster. I don’t know stability anymore. I don’t know anything anymore. 
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illegal-spiegel · 2 years ago
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if u ever have the time I’d love to read some of your HCs about what spike would be like with his newborn kid/the mom since I was kind of obsessed with your pregnant reader hcs🥹 love your work!
YES OMG ANON YOURE SO SMART ILY MWAH
Read previous parts to this here or specifically this one!
well, you heard the man!
he wants to be there for his kid!
so bc he knows absolutely nothing about children other than they’re annoying, they cry for everything, and they’re a pain in the ass
he gets lots of baby and parenting books
after reading a few books, he learns something
he’s not going to be a good dad
he’s going to be the best dad, god dammit!
you’ve never seen him so fired up and focused before
this man is dedicated
definitely the type of s/o that is constantly worrying and fretting over you (he already lowkey did that before you were preggers, but now it’s like he’s on overdrive)
he legit thinks you’re made of glass, on god
he basically becomes super clingy and won’t leave you alone for two seconds 
sit him down and talk to him all you want about giving you personal space, it’ll just go in one ear and out the other 
“Okay, babe. I promise I’ll give you more space.” my ass
he goes on any and all missions with you, even if it’s just to get more food or to seal a deal with someone 
it doesn’t matter. He’s there, babyyyyy
okay but like he actually becomes like super sweet and it kinda scares you bc normally he’s...well, Spike
Mr. I-Don’t-Need-Anyone-Or-Anything is now Mr. BaBy-WhErE-ArE-yOu-GoInG-dO-YoU-NeEd-HeLp
okay but no fr he’s so sweet tho 
grabs anything and everything for you, rubs your feet, presses his ear to your belly, will literally travel across the universe for you if you told him there was smth there for your unborn child 
he’s really hoping for a boy 
don’t get it twisted though. In front of the others, he acts all aloof and as if he doesn’t care
they all know better though
they even pull pranks on him 
“Spike, (Y/n) needs you in th-”
he’s already gone
you always grow confused when he suddenly appears panting and looking frantic 
“What is it? What do you need? Are you okay? Is the baby coming?” 
ah, so it was Faye again 
“Babe...I’m not going into labor for another six weeks...”
just stops dead in his tracks and sighs, realizing he’s been bamboolozed once again
Faye - 7, Spike - 2
he takes you to all your appointments in the Swordfish
every. single. one. 
he never misses one 
he even goes so far to play music for your unborn baby and reads to you both 
stop im literally going to cry
yeah well, imagine his fear when you actually do go into labor 
it’s actually kinda a funny story (not to him tho)
he was out on a mission by himself (bc Jet promised to keep an eye on you) when it happens
when he gets a call and sees Faye, he instantly rolls his eyes
“What is it?” 
“(Y/n)’s going into labor!” she screeches
his heart rate instantly spikes (haha-) but he quickly calms down
“Haha, very funny, Faye. Now fuck of-”
“I’m not kidding!”
“Sure you aren-”
“Babe! Get your ass here or I’ll kill you myself!” 
his eyes go wide at the sound of your voice, his hands instantly jerking his controls to the right to turn himself around 
“I’ll be right there! Just hold on!” 
“Don’t tell me what to do!” He can’t help but smile at that. You’re always so feisty. He likes that in a woman. His woman
“There’s no time for you to meet us here. We’re taking her to the nearest hospital on the Hammer Head!” Jet calls somewhere off screen
“Yeah, right, okay! Uh, just send me your coordinates when you get there!” 
he makes it there practically as soon as you arrive
he definitely broke some laws just to get to you 
“I’m here, baby. I’m right here. Deep breaths,” he says softly to you, pushing your hair out of your sweaty face
he’s there for the entire thing, offering you whatever you need to make the experience easier for you 
imagine his surprise when you have a girl instead 
he cuts the umbilical cord and holds his baby girl in his arms 
he definitely doesn’t cry shut up Jet
“Uh, can I hold the child I just spent hours pushing out of me now?” 
“Yeah, yeah, in a sec...” he absent-mindedly replies, holding the baby to his chest and cooing at the sweet bundle in his arms
sigh, is definitely that parent that spoils his kid. You can’t tell me I’m wrong 
will buy any and everything for his baby girl don’t play 
he will let you pick the name for the baby (it only seems fair after what you had to go through to bring the little bundle of joy into the world) 
if you want his two cents though, he thinks the name Roxanne or Dani would be cool 
if you joke about naming her Faye, he will literally walk out on protest ✋
no matter what though, he’s going to be there for every step of the way with taking care of your baby <3
⊱ ────── {⋅. ♪ .⋅} ────── ⊰
MASTERLIST
More with Spike Spiegel 
Join my discord server: https://discord.gg/qnDxJ6rr67 
Tag List: @nojamsss03, @katsuhera, @sunflowersenshi ✦ if you would like to be added or removed, comment or send an ask. Also, remember to tell me if you ever change your username so I can continue to tag you :)
⊱ ────── {⋅. ♪ .⋅} ────── ⊰
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yesimwriting · 3 years ago
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Would you write a Kaz Brekker request where the reader is a bookworm and a crow and basically Kaz asks the reader to read to him as his way of apologizing after a argument that was his fault?
 it ​​a/n i did something kinda similar in a 'promise of rain' blurb,, but this concept is so cute to me:)) love it sm i moved it up my request cue lol
also IM IN COLLEGE NOW!! WHAT?? AND IVE BEEN TO A PARTY! AND IM JOINING A SORORITY AND I DID DRAMA AUDITIONS AND AHH !! SO DIFFERENT! I MISS MY MOM AND SISTER AND DOG AND EVEN MY DAD BUT IM HAPPY HERE!! 
also im a little worried this might not portray kaz superrrrr accurately bc it's been awhile so just let me know,, feedback leads to improvement:)) also kinda set this up for a part 2 bc...well youll see 
--
They've always said a lot of things about him, and I've always heard them. But I've never quite believed them. Sure, I get why the dark things that have flourished in the poisoned soil that is Ketterdam consider Kaz Brekker the darkest thing of all. I understand the nickname 'Dirtyhands' for the gloved criminal who has fooled each crime boss at least once. I understand each terrible thing they've said about him.
But I've never agreed with them. I've never even considered agreeing with them. Until today.
The thought that maybe everything people say about him is correct in a simple context struck me worse than the silence after our argument. It made me feel like both a fool and hypocrite. Kaz and I have had our fair share of spats over the relatively short time we've known each other, but never like this. Never so badly he stormed out of the room before I could. I squeeze the book in my lap even harder, desperate to focus on the words on the pages.
You didn't hurt him. He walked away because he decided you weren't worth the cost of his expensive time. I repeat those thoughts in my mind over and over again, letting them bitter me further. It's a lot easier to be mad than hurt. A lot easier to fuel your pain than try to understand your mistakes. Besides, tiredness is already dredging around in my chest and if I don't calm down a little I won't be able to fall asleep.
I had escalated the fight more than I should have. Knowing Kaz is like performing in a tightrope act. One must always be aware of where they're going. Watching what's in front of them without ever thinking too much about what's beneath or behind them. Today though, when I needed my balance most I chose to fall. I chose to dive, and apparently there was no net.
"Oh, you're doing that thing."
I roll my eyes at Jesper's voice as I fight down a yawn. I wipe my face with the back of my palm before turning. The burning behind my eyes never resulted in full tears, but I feel better after doing so. "What thing?"
"That terribly noble thing where you find it in yourself to take full blame for every single conflict you and boss man fall into." The slight humor in his voice is enough for me to roll my eyes again. "Between you and me, I'm sure the reason he's so angry now is because you didn't do that for once."
I press my lips together as my chin angles itself upwards slightly. "I never do that." He raises an eyebrow. The slight sympathy that colors the look is more offensive than his accusation. "If I pick and choose my battles, it's for good reason."
"Clearly."
"What's that supposed to mean?"
He shrugs once before further entering my room. I say nothing when he sits at the foot of my bed. "Oh, you know," Jesper stretches back casually, resting his back against the wall and extending his legs, "You and Kaz--Kaz and you."
Has he been drinking? Perhaps he's not here because of my unusual absence from downstairs after my fight with Kaz but because he's already too tipsy to think right. "What?"
At my confused look he grins, flashing all of his teeth with an arrogance that outshines the whiteness of them. He taps the still open book in my lap. "Let me put it in terms you'll understand." Jesper sits up a little further, amusement clear in his features. "You two make a shameful Elizabeth and Darcy--"
"Oh, shut up," I groan, glaring at him, "This isn't Pride and Prejudice. And Kaz and I," Jesper's smugness returns when I can't quite think of what I want to say, "We're barely friends--we're barely anything, let alone what you're implying."
Jesper pulls his legs up and shoves me gently. "Dearest, y/n," he ignores my glare, "You should know better than anyone that 'barely friends, barely anything' with Kaz is more than it is with anyone else?"
"That doesn't mea--"
"You two say goodnight to each other." Once. Kaz and I said good night to each other in front of Jesper once. How dare he assume it happens regularly? He's right, but that doesn't mean I'm okay with it. "You play cards with him. Not for money, not for skill--"
"It's for practice." The look Jesper gives me is enough to tell me that my defense didn't land.
Damn him for ever finding Kaz and I on one of those strange nights. One of those nights in which he lurks at the stairwell...the one that divides my room and his attic. One of those nights in which it feels like he's a phantom and I'm the only one that can really see him. A night in which we both silently find each other.
I couldn't quite believe it the first time it happened. I'm not exactly a Crow--I don't feel enough a connection to the Dregs to join them without some kind of guarantee--but I was needed for some obscure job. but I was needed for some obscure job. The Crows needed an insider who could blend into high society, and I needed a place to stay away from my father.
It worked. I worked. And with each passing day I found myself enjoying the Crows more and more. That's why I stayed. That's why I started checking the stairwell practically every night, a set of playing cards in my hand.
The first time had been awkward. I couldn't sleep and my room felt too quiet, but the rambunctious club felt too loud and a little unsafe considering the hour. So I settled for the only space in between. When Kaz found me sitting on the steps and playing a solitary card game I had been so stunned by embarrassment I just offered to deal him in. I had been more shocked when he silently accepted my offer.
"Practice?" Jesper repeats. "You were laughing, I heard you."
"That was one time--how do you know we didn't just happen to play cards together the one time you saw it?"
"Because you laughed about a play you considered 'predictable'."
Sighing, I sit up a little straighter. "I'm not having this conversation. Occasionally saying 'goodnight' to someone who lives in the same space I live in and sometimes playing cards with said person because we both happen to be up at a certain time doesn't mean anything."
"And the way he looked at the contact that was flirting with you?"
Oh...this conversation again. "For the last time, the contact wasn't flirting with me. We had to dance to blend in and when he leaned towards me to whisper in my ear...it was to tell me the intel Kaz just had to have."
"And when he tucked that strand of hair behind your ear?"
"He just wanted to sell our cove--"
"Y/n, he kissed your cheek and I'm fairly certain he would have kissed you if Kaz and I hadn't made it to the corridor at that second."
Why is everyone so obsessed with what would have never happened? The contact had been attractive, tall with fair eyes and hair. But it's not like I feel anything for him, nor would I have been so foolish during a job. A fact that Kaz refuses to believe. I'm tired of this argument...I'm just tired. This job required me to start getting ready early in the morning and lasted long into the night.
"I wouldn't have kissed him and even if I had, the fact that Kaz is so mad about feels...sexist." A stupid argument, considering that Kaz couldn't care less if the person he's working with is female, male, or anything in between because the only thing he cares about is profit. "It's a stupid thing to be mad about, but you hit on anything with a pulse at any time and--"
"I resent that--"
"For the first two weeks I was here I thought you might've been a prostitute."
I can feel him holding in a laugh. "Did you at least think I was a good prostitute?" When I glare again, he finally actually laughs. "Not the point--got it."
"Then what is the point? You're bored and obsessed with gossip so now you're shaking me for information you don't need."
"The point is you're oblivious." Rude...I move my leg in a weak attempt to push him off my bed. Jesper catches my ankle easily, ignoring my attempt at a fight. "You thought the contact was only doing his job and you don't know the real reason that Kaz blew up at you for the first time the way he blows up at everyone."
"Okay, well since you know everything, tell me why he's mad."
He lets out a sigh like he can't believe I even needed to ask that. "It's not the best look that the first time you let him pick a fight with you happens to be about some guy."
...Maybe he is drunk? "Don't be so cryptic. I don't like you enough to put up with that."
Jesper half-sighs again before pushing himself off my bed. "I'm going to pretend I think you're smart enough to piece things together from that."
"Asshole," I mumble instinctually as he walks towards my door. "Are you not telling me because I tried to push you off the bed?"
He turns when he reaches my door in order to lean against my door frame. "It's not not because of that." I should throw my book at his head. "In all seriousness, think about it. If you don't you'll either kill each other or kill me."
Ugh...he's so confusing. This time, I let him go. He leaves he door open, which is beyond annoying. I stand up to close it, promising myself I will focus on my book the second it's in my hands again. As I walk back towards my bed, my eyes land on the deck of cards on my nightstand.
Does it send a signal I don't want to send if I don't go the stairwell tonight? Do I want to send a signal? I don't know...actually, the only thing I know is that I don't want to think about this a second longer. I don't ease as I read, but my eyelids become heavier with each word they cross. I feel the weight of them as my focus slips, farther and farther away until I can no longer focus. When my eyes fall shut I can't bring myself to think or force them open.
--
I notice my surprised before I register that I've just woken up. Falling asleep feels so far and yet the crick in my neck confirms the obvious. Rubbing the eyes with the back of my hand, I push my book from my lap and sit up. The only indication of how much time has passed is how much my bedside candle has melted.
How long have I been asleep? How did I manage to fall asleep? I thought I was too mad at Kaz to manage anything but pouting in my room. I hadn't even decided if I wanted to talk to him.
I stand even though I haven't decided anything. I should at least change if I want to go to bed. But is leaving this alone for even longer a bad idea? I think Jesper thought so...though my conversation with him is far from clear. It's not the best look that the first time you let him pick a fight with you happens to be about some guy. I'm going to pretend I think you're smart enough to piece things together from that. What does he want me to do with that?
Maybe he was partially intoxicated and felt the need to play the role of a good friend. Or maybe this is his idea of a joke.
Whatever--regardless of Jesper, I have a choice to make. A tiny part of me hopes it's insignificant, but I know Kaz enough to know that nothing is insignificant to him. He holds onto things the way he holds onto his kruge. Perhaps I'll seek out Inej, she seems to be the best at rationalizing. Though she might be asleep by now, or on a job or...I don't even know.
How late is it? Is it late enough to be one of the few hours Kaz claims to reserve for sleep? Maybe my bad luck is still around and he's already in bed for once. Does that mean his anger will extend to tomorrow?
I shouldn't care. It's not like I'm in the wrong. Did I escalate things? Maybe a little...but I won't apologize for defending myself. Even though that makes everything a little easier. I feel stuck, like in some kind of place of half sleep. A single knock at my door is enough to make me want to jump. I rub my eyes a little more firmly in hopes of waking up more before someone sees me.
I approach the door without worry. Maybe it's not as late as I assumed. Or maybe it's really early? I open the door while still fighting against my slight disorientation. I'm so focused on acting normal, I almost don’t register the person standing at my door. 
I don’t know who I expected, or what--maybe Jesper, much more tipsy than he was before, slumped against the doorframe, only knocking because he’s too tired to push the door open. Maybe even Inej, on her way here to deliver some kind of job or notice of dismissal. But it’s nothing I could expect. It’s...Kaz. 
The Dirtyhands stands at my door, expression as hard as ever yet something behind his eyes that burns the sleep away from me. “Uh--hi.” I bite my tongue to avoid cringing at that very awkward beginning. “Are you here to kick me out yourself?” The only response I get is the slightest shift of his gaze off of my face. “No? Well then I think I’m going to bed. It’s late.” 
My tone and words are clear. Get out of my doorway, I’m in no mood to go back to arguing.  When he still doesn’t say anything, I’m emboldened by my nerves. I push the door between us without breaking eye contact. 
Before the wood can meet the doorframe, he moves his cane, wedging it between us. “Y/n.” I don’t understand the way he says my name, but I’m certain he’s never said it like that. “I...” When he’s not prompted by the uncomfortableness of silence, I raise an eyebrow, my grip on the door tightening. “What I said shouldn’t have been said.” Wait--is he admitting fault? I’m so thrown I almost melt entirely. “Not to you.” 
The addition leaves him so lowly a part of me wonders if I’ve imagined it. I’m so thrown by it I don’t even think to reply until a long second has passed. “You seemed to believe the opposite a few hours ago.” 
His lips press together for a moment. “You didn’t ask me to play cards tonight.” He took that as intentional? At least that got me some kind of apology? I keep my mouth shut, greed making me want more information. I guess he must sense my silent tugging because he head inclines slightly. “Don’t push.” 
I fight down a grin. “Push what?” His only response to stiffen further. “I’m going to tell you something as a peace offering.” That seems to intrigue him in some way. I can’t tell if it’s a good kind of interested, but I note the slight raise of his eyebrows and his intentional silence. “I didn’t chose not to ask you to play cards.” He gives me no indication of anything, which is fair...considering my vagueness. “I was mad, obviously, and in the middle of deciding on a course of action...and then I fell asleep.” 
A long pause of silence. “You fell asleep?” 
I’m not sure if his incredulous tone should offend me or not. If I wanted to lie, I’d like to think he knows me well enough to know that I’d have thought of a better excuse than that. Or at least a less embarrassing one. “Yes, it’s not that difficult to believe. Today had been long and all I wanted to do was read, but then Jesper came in to say the oddest things and then leave me to...” 
Oh--oh. I guess there’s a reason people say to ‘sleep on’ something. Because now, actively remembering Jesper’s words for the first time since I fell asleep...I understand what Jesper was implying in the oddest way possible. He meant that Kaz and I...that perhaps there is a Kaz and I in a context that’s more than just grammatical. Wow. I really had to realize this with Kaz right in front of me. 
My face feels warmer than it did before, an irrational bout of anxiety forcing me to consider that me might be able to read impossible, embarrassing thoughts from my expression alone. 
“What did Jesper say?” I’m too lost in my own spiral of confusion and panic and some feeling I can’t recognize to register how Kaz asks his question. There’s an edge to it, an odd one, but that could easily just be Kaz. 
This is most definitely the last conversation we need to be having. I’m still mad at him for his earlier dramatics. So I just shake my head, feigning an exhaustion I could lose myself in. “Nothing and everything all at once.” I resist the urge to rub my eyes again. “I’m pretty sure he was drinking, and I wasn’t really listening. I was just trying to read.” 
Kaz’s expression hardens briefly as he takes in my words, and then he exhales, nodding once with the breath. “What were you reading?” 
My lips part instinctually, ready to spew off details about the latest novel that’s captured my attention. But before I can let myself take off, the reality of the situation strikes me directly in the chest. This is not Nina, or Inej, or even Jesper after what he considers a ‘good night’. This is Kaz Brekker, the man believed to not have a soul. I’ve spoken to him before about casual things, though most of the nights in which we end up playing cards or just sitting near each other are spent in silence. But he’s never prompted me before. Not in the one topic he knows is guaranteed to turn me into an overenthusiastic, gushing fountain of poor summaries and character analysis. 
I guess this is his peace offering. This shouldn’t warm the way it does. He was still unbelievably dramatic and treated me like I’m some kind of unreliable fool. “It’s late, and you know how I can be. I’d hate to keep you for nothing more than a poor summary and honestly, an embarrassing rant about plot or characters, because there’s just nothing as frustrating as when two people so clearly care about each other and both are too stubborn and oblivious to acknowledge it.” 
Kaz’s eyebrows draw together just enough for me to be able to make out a shift of expression in the poor light. Perhaps his lingering irritation is preparing to rear its ugly head. The corner of his mouth seems to threaten to tilt upwards as Kaz angles his head to the side slightly. “I can’t imagine that position.” 
No kidding. I bite my tongue to keep the sarcastic comment and awkward laugh that would sure follow it away. “Who can? That’s like half the point of reading.” 
How can interaction feel so over and just at its beginning all at once? I press my lips together to avoid filling the silence with things I’d no doubt instantly regret. It’s easy to be mad at Kaz in the moment. Too easy. But to stay mad at him when his temper has passed and he returns with some kind of begrudging and admittedly awkward and uncertain truce is another task entirely. 
“I’ve never understood your attachment to written words.” 
“It’s not about understanding, it’s about everything else.” 
“And you say I’m cryptic.” Is he...kinda almost joking? I straighten my spine, too tired to fight and too wounded to forgive. “There’s understanding in everything, nothing can survive on sentiment alone.” 
“If you read the way I did, you’d understand.” 
His lips press together as his expression remains unwavering in its hardness. “Read to me.” 
...Interacting with Kaz in any way often leaves me feeling like I’m wandering through unknown territory. But this, this is undeniably different. So different I can’t even think of a way to react. I watch his expression as cautiously as possible. He’s purely reserved, no distinction from the look he wears during business propositions. Except there’s a tightness I can’t quite understand.
Maybe it’s because I don’t want to fight anymore. Maybe it’s because exhaustion is leaving me partially delirious. Or maybe it’s the weird feeling in my chest that I can’t quite place. That I don’t want to place. “Okay.” I shift carefully. “If for no other reason then to prove you wrong.” 
Never did I think I’d end up in the position of sitting in my bed, book in hand, with Kaz Brekker sitting next to me. But here we are. I’m so tired, I almost let out a nervous laugh when he first walked in. So brooding and tall, gripping the head of his head cane as he sits at the foot of my bed, on my pastel quilt. 
I’m glad for the excuse to keep my gaze away from him and on the words in front of me. I read out loud, feeling more and more comfortable with each page I finish. But as my inhibitions slip away, so dos my hold on consciousness. My eyelids seem to grow heavier with each word that I read. 
“You’re falling asleep.” 
I straighten my spine on instinct. “Am not.” I’m not sure why I feel the need to deny something so simple. 
“You’re impossible.” 
From him, that statement is laugh worthy. “I’m impossible? Do you not remember earlier today?” 
From the way his jaw locks, I realize that he’s in no mood to be light about this topic. I don’t understand why. It’s not like I’m the one that wronged him. “I remember your lack of focus.” 
Keeping my hands at my side to avoid rubbing my eyes, I frown. “If you want to have this argument again, fine. Jesper is more ‘distracted’ than me half the time and you’re much more lenient on him. It’s not like I was flirting with someone or gambling or doing anything but having a two second conversation. One that I needed to have to get information that you wanted.” 
The last time we fought, I had more energy to restrain myself. This could be atomic. I hold my breath, waiting for Kaz’s retaliation. He exhales, eyes not meeting mine. “Arguing with you when you’re present is exhausting enough. It’s not worth it when you’re half asleep.” 
This angers me further. I hate that he’s right. “I’m not half asleep.” He leaves it at that. I glare even harder at him, slumping further into my bed. “But for the sake of argument, I’ll drop it. Something you’re incapable of doing.” 
At that, his eyes meet mine. I try to hold his gaze, but the harder I think about not seeming tired the more exhaustion slips in. A yawn escapes me before he looks away. Great. “I know when to lie in the grass in wait.” 
Rolling my eyes, I shift back slightly. He’s incapable of being less dramatic than this. Still, I can’t imagine the effort it’s taking on his part to not start an argument. Maybe this is why Jesper spent so long implying that there may be a Kaz and I in any capacity beyond a vague kind of friendship. “I’ll admit you’re tactful.”
“Resourceful people recognize that trait in other people.” 
Blinking twice, I lower my book slightly. Am I truly exhausted, or did he just compliment me in a way? “Careful, I may start to think you find me tolerable.” 
“Let’s not exaggerate.” Okay, now I know I’m exhausted because I think he might have just attempted a joke. Rolling my eyes, I decide not to acknowledge this lightness in fear that I’ll scare it away. “Y/n?” 
I press my lips together, worried about the destruction of our peace. “Yes?” 
“What did Jesper say to you? Earlier?” I pause, slightly unsure why we’re moving backwards. 
We’re in a decent place now, and I’d hate to ruin it. I’m too half asleep to lie eloquently. And it’s not like he’s an easily convinced man. “Oh, he said it so cryptically it took me longer than it should have to understand. And it didn’t help that it was something so...well, you might find it funny. As funny as you find anything, anyways.” Wow...I’ve spent such a long time talking. Rubbing the back of my eyes, I avoid his gaze. Exhaustion and awkwardness mix in my stomach oddly. “It seemed like he was trying to imply that you and I...me and you...” Why is this a difficult thing to say? It’s not like I was implying it and Jesper’s known for his oddness. “I think Jesper was implying that there was a you and I, or at least that there could be.” I’m too lost in a haze of almost sleep to watch his reaction. I let my head rest against my headboard even further. “Isn’t that odd?” 
He’s quiet for a long second, and then he finally speaks again. “Odd, even for Jesper.” The response doesn’t satiate me...what’s that about? I exhale, deciding that feeling is tomorrow’s problem. When I blink, I decide to let my eyes stay closed. Just for a moment. The sound of something shifting is what makes my eyes squint open. Kaz is standing, his expression unreadable as he straightens. “Goodnight, y/n.” 
At that, I sit up slightly, ignoring the exhaustion behind my eyes. “I haven’t finished the chapter.” 
“You’ve convinced me of enough.” A concession? How exhausted do I seem? My lips press together as I think of my next argument. Before I can get it out, Kaz leans forward. He grabs the quilt at the end of my bed and tosses it onto my legs casually. “Goodnight, y/n.” The meaning of his repetition is clear. His word is final. 
I find enough energy to manage a glare, but I pull the quilt over my legs anyways. “Goodnight, Kaz.”
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euphoricsunflowers · 4 years ago
Text
calling you daddy — monsta x
scenario: they ask about your kinks and you ask them to call you daddy
a/n: this is written with a fem reader in mind but is not strictly fem reader as no pronouns or anything is mentioned.
a/n: was this a request? nope tbh this was written for myself bc i’m sick and tired of seeing people call these men daddy so uh pls enjoy
word count: 2k
content: sub!monsta x, dom!reader, daddy kink obviously ajshdhs, minhyuk is kinda bratty? kinda??, lots of teasing and begging, mentions of consent and stuff
son hyunwoo/shownu:
he falls silent. he doesn’t know what to say in the slightest. he worries that he might hurt your feelings or say something out of line, but it just stuns him, “you don’t have to do it if you’re uncomfortable with that, bear. your consent is just as important,” you say.
but see that’s half of what’s stunning him. he’s not exactly uncomfortable with that. shownu’s nature is pleasing you, he doesn’t mind filling any role or position for you, this was just a little more intense than that.
“you know what? just forget we had this conversation. i don’t want you to feel pressured, and it’s not a big deal, okay?” you say.
but the idea lingers in his head whether or not you want it to. as the days go by, his mind wanders, and while it may not exactly be what he’d be into, he’s not against doing it for you.
as you manhandle him a little bit, he says it softly, “ah, daddy-,” it’s even more embarrassing than he imagined, and his cheeks and ears are flushed and hot, but when he says it, softly under his breath, just whispering it out to test the waters, he sees your shock and then your small little smirk.
“now that i know what it sounds like to hear you say that, and what that does to me,” you say, sneaking your hands under his shirt and letting them wander, playing with his chest a bit, “i don’t think it’s a good idea to say that if you wanna make it out of this bedroom spotless and in one piece.”
he blushes even more, a little shy and hesitant, but he likes having this kind of effect on you, so that may not be the last time he says it. besides, who says he cares if he makes it out in one piece? and spotless? his neck and chest and thighs were too clean anyway.
lee hoseok/wonho:
it was in the middle of you riding him, his wrists bound above his head with a rope that made his skin look so pretty against it. he’s already cum once, but you’re not stopping until you do, and he’s trying to keep himself together. your hands roughly playing with his chest is overstimulating and he’s overwhelmed. he pleads for mercy aimlessly, almost thoughtlessly.
but then, “if you’re gonna beg, call me daddy,” you murmur. he’s not even sure he hears you right when you say it. he looks at you with wide eyes, and he assumed he did because of the way you act. he knows he could stop you at any time because you’re very clear on consent and it’s not like this was completely out of left field considering how you’re already always in charge in the bedroom. he was just stunned.
and while he’s a little bit stunned, he also won’t deny that it is a little bit hot.
so he does, “please, daddy, it’s so much- i- i can’t handle it.”
he sees your smile, with just a drop of sadism behind the curl of your lip, “just a little more, baby, i’m close. you make daddy feel so good,” he gets so excited by the praise that he attempts to stick it out, forever still the man that just wants to make you happy and please you.
he forgets about himself and his own body for a moment when he feels your body tense up around him and you hold onto his chest as you orgasm, using him to get the most out of it before you slow down to a halt.
your heavy breathes and sweet nothings whispered in his ear are heavenly.
lee minhyuk:
“really? you’re into that? i honestly thought it would be the other way around.”
taken aback, you ask, “really? what gave you that impression?”
“idk, you don’t have this aura of dominance, so i didn’t really assume that was your thing.”
“is that- is that okay with you?”
he gets closer, teasing in the way he wants to make you shy, “you seem pretty bashful for someone who just asked to be called daddy in the bedroom.”
“minhyuk-,”
he rolls his eyes, obviously trying to get a rise out of you, “come on, i don’t even know if you have it in you.”
and something about his careless, taunting tone sets something off inside you, like he was challenging you. but it’s a challenge you take on when you approach him. your touch is softer, lighter than he imagined. he thought you would be lit aflame with a need to prove yourself to him. but you lean in to press a kiss on his neck and your wandering hands settle on his hips.
you’re gentle with him initially, yet he melts a little bit when one hand tightens and another begins to unbutton his shirt, giving your mouth access to his chest.
you push him onto the couch, straddling him and using a hand to hold both of his arms above his head, when you pull back, he looks dazed and needy, all those teasing smirks having faded off his features, “why are you so affected? i thought i didn’t even have it in me,” you say with a smirk this time.
he breathes heavily, “y/n- please-”
“oh please, that’s not my name anymore, min.”
yoo kihyun:
“you want me to what?!” his voice is randomly high pitched, loud, almost like he’s nervous or scared.
despite that anxious feeling you’re feeling too, you try to stay calm, “i understand if you’re uncomfortable by it, but you asked about my kinks, kihyun.”
“yeah i know- i just- i wasn’t expecting that- really? you’re not messing with me? that’s really what you want?” he looks exasperated.
“yes. i really want you to call me daddy.”
he goes silent, trying to comprehend in his head what the hell was going on and what he was going to do and why the more he thinks about it, the less vehemently against it he becomes. and he had spent the entire relationship making it clear that he cared about what you wanted (because he does) and it’s not like… he hates the idea of it, but it’s just so out there to him that he can’t even fathom or imagine it.
he asks for a few days just to think about it, and though the awkwardness lingers in the air, by the fourth day, it seems like you had mostly forgotten about it or at least it didn’t seem to be on your mind. he spends those days really thinking, trying to imagine what it would be like, why you would even want that.
but the next time you’re together alone, your hands and lips are on him and he experimentally says it, “daddy, please.”
the whiny, begging voice, coupled with the word, leave you stunned. you pull back with wide eyes, and he felt so embarrassed and shameful with your eyes on him like that, but then you pulled him back into you and kissed him with a certain kind of feverish desperation that made his knees weak.
chae hyungwon:
his reaction is oddly pretty calm. he asked about what you were into, and you told him. maybe he was expect something a little different, but to be honest, he knew you liked to be in control, and he usually just went along with it. he didn’t mind it especially because you always made sure you both felt good and that was all that matters. that and he kinda likes being told what to do.
so it doesn’t exactly surprise him, especially when you add, “but only in a sexual context! i don’t need you to say it all the time.”
“good because there’s no way in hell i’m calling you daddy in front of my friends,” he can see the thoughts behind your eyes wanting to take up that challenge, but he decides to ignore it, “as far as they’re concerned, i’m daddy.”
“sure, wonnie. sure,” you say dismissively, before looking back at him, “are you actually okay with it though? i know it’s… weird.”
“it wasn’t what i was expecting, but if that’s what you want, then i’ll do it.”
and as soon as you’ve got him under you, with kisses and marks trailing down his neck and chest, leaving him helplessly turned on and horny, he says it so naturally, you wonder if he even thought to do it. but whether or not he’s doing this solely for you, or because he might have found it a little hot, is between him and himself, “ahh, daddy, please- be gentle with me- i have a photoshoot in the morning- oh my god that feels so good please daddy don’t stop-”
lee jooheon:
he likes the idea of it when you mention it, he just gets kinda shy, “do you- do you really want me to call you that?”
you come closer, holding his hand and rubbing your thumb against it in a comforting manner, “yeah, i really like the idea of it. if you’re not completely against it, i’d be really happy if we could try it.”
“it’s not… the worst thing you could have told me you were into,” he laughs as your hand starts to massage his thigh instead, “we can try it. i'll tell you if we need to stop, but i think it’ll be okay.”
“good, i’m glad you’re reacting this way, honey,” you murmur as you kiss him, and he smiles, which, even if it makes the kiss a little awkward, is really cute, “sweetheart,” you whisper as you pull away, “can you say it? i just wanna hear you say it.”
your hands wander his skin nervously, he can tell you’re worried about him being uncomfortable, “ahh, d-daddy, please touch me more,” he whines, and he’s never been more compelling before, but somehow the use of that word really makes you want to give in and give him anything he wants, “please touch me.”
your hand falls a little lower upon his request, and he groans lightly, pulling you a little closer, “you’re perfect, baby, so pretty.”
“ahh, please,” he huffs, clearly growing shy with the praise, but it’s obvious he really likes it, so you touch him more and whisper sweet words into his ear with a kiss, “oh- oh my- daddy- please i-”
“you’re so cute, sweetie pie, especially when you’re feeling good, you look so pretty and content. it’s my favorite sight,” you say adoringly, looking at him with the biggest heart eyes.
“wow, i didn’t expect to like this this much but-“ he whispers, “-i kinda love it.”
im changkyun/i.m:
he doesn’t react much when you say it, making you wonder if he was uncomfortable or not into it, but in any case, you assume it’s going to be forgotten in a few days and there would be nothing to worry about.
until he’s trying to get you to play with him and you’re trying to work. he can’t deny that he gets horny easily and you’re right there! he tries to tease in an way he can think possible, but to no avail. you’re still just sitting there, typing away on your laptop.
“just another thirty minutes, and then im all yours, baby,” you murmur to him, and he pouts subconsciously out of frustration.
he gets an idea, and i’m sure you know what it is.
“alright, you’re busy and i respect that. i guess i’ll just leave you be and go play by myself, daddy,” he giggles when you look over at him for the first time in this encounter and then he walks away.
as he sits on the bed in your bedroom, he awaits the sound of your footsteps, knowing he’s won. the door opens, and you walk in too casually, enough to make him suspicious, until he’s pulled onto your lap with your lips on his shoulder. your hands sneak under his hoodie, and his hands brace himself on your shoulders for stability, “ah- y/n-”
“baby, i did not set aside my work that’s due tomorrow morning to come fuck your brains out just for you to call me that,” he shivers, so incredibly turned on, “try again.”
taglist: @lovingonrepeat @neosincity @sub-hoshi-enthusiast @multidreams-and-desires @hobilluvvr @vanillaknj @yr-domxfantasies @treasure-hwa @fleurshopsub @rubyscloud9 @silencefavarchive @nct99 @bigkpopstan @monstaxdirtywonk @domreaderrecs @mochi-ficz and always feel free to ask to be added to/removed from the taglist <3
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watchmegetobsessed · 4 years ago
Text
SAFE AND SOUND
a/n: this one took a little longer to write, but im so happy its finally finished! its not what i originally planned, i started a whole different plot but hated it so started again, but i might go back to the first story, so maybe more bodyguard!harry content is gonna come! anyway, hope you’ll enjoy this one!
pairing: Bodyguard!Harry X Reader
warning: use of weapon (no one dies), mentioning of cancer (no one is sick), sexual content
word count: 9.1k
masterlist
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“This is not up for discussion, Y/N. What you are doing and what you are about to achieve soon might upset a lot of people that hold great power. We can’t just assume you’ll be fine, walking around like anyone else in the world.”
Your boss, Julian explains it to you, leaning onto his desk, trying his best to keep his cool about your protest to get you a guard to watch out for you and keep you safe. It’s been an ongoing struggle and fight you two have been having these past weeks and it became a burning situation since you’ve made some major progress in your project.
“I’m not some kind of royalty to have security with me all the time,” you grumble rolling your eyes.
“Not just royalties have guards, Y/N. Just accept it, that you’re valuable, your work is very important not just to our company but to the whole world. Do you not realize how big it is? You are close to having the cure to cancer, Y/N! You can easily get a Nobel-prize for that!”
“I know that it’s important, but no one knows me, no one will see me on the street and know who I am or what I do!”
“It’s not about the people on the street. The world is a dark place, darker than you could imagine. Please, just… I want to know that you’re safe.”
Staring back at him with your arms folded on your chest you contemplate his words. You can see the rationality in his words, it’s just that you don’t want to break your routine, you don’t want people around you all the time, you don’t want to end your privacy like that. But Julian is right, your work is important and there have already been a few attempts to steal your researches, but they miserably failed. However that doesn’t mean they will be stopped the next time as well.
“One guard,” you speak up. “Just one. I’m not gonna have a whole fucking team,” you tell him raising your eyebrows. He lets out a relieved sigh, a tiny smile tugging on his lips.
“I was hoping you’d say that.” Reaching out to the phone he presses the buzzer that signals to his assistant, Monica outside and a few moments later she walks in, accompanied with a tall, suited man, his green eyes immediately falling to you upon entering the room.
“Y/N, I took the courage to pick him out for you myself. This is Harry Styles, the best you can find in the city if not in the country,” Julian introduces him as he pushes himself away from his giant mahogany desk, walking closer to the man as they shake hands firmly. You stand up from the armchair you’ve been sinking into these past ten minutes and unsurely hold out your hand to the man.
“Harry Styles, pleasure to meet you,” he introduces himself, a thick British accent lacing through his voice and the way his green irises stare back at you, you can feel your heart fluttering in your chest. Mr. Styles is undeniably the most charming and handsome man you’ve ever met, with his perfectly carved cheekbones and chiseled jawline, pink lips and those enchanting green eyes framed by his thick lashes. There’s something in his appearance, something feminine, but still, he holds so much masculinity at the same time, it’s hard not to be enamored by him.
“Y/N Y/L/N,” you mumble your name, shaking his hand slightly before letting go of it.
“Details about your cooperation have already been discussed with the security agency and us, but of course, your word is what counts, so we’ll walk over the whole plan with you as well,” Julian explains to you and you nod shortly.
The three of you move to the conference room and the next hour goes by with working those so called details out, some of them are ridiculous, some of them you can get used to, at the end you are left with a somewhat bearable plan, but one thing is for sure. Harry Styles will be a big part of your life from now on.
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THREE MONTHS LATER
The tiny pack of sugar tears open in your hands, but you put too much effort into it so the countertop is now covered with the content of the pack instead of ending up in your paper cup.
“Fuck,” you growl, dumping the empty pack into the trash before grabbing another one, hoping it won’t end up the same way.
“Let me help you,” a smooth, male voice speaks up next to you and Harry grabs the pack from your hands as he places his own coffee to the counter. You let him tear the pack open easily, pouring the sugar into your drink without problem before he puts the lid back to your cup.
“Thank you,” you mumble, closing your tired eyes for a split second. You’ve been overworking way too much these past weeks, it’s starting to shut your system down, but you don’t want to rest, not when you’re so close to finishing your project.
The past two weeks have been major, you finally made the progress you’ve been working towards for months now, letting you step into the last phase of your work finally. But it’s been a quite stressful time as you’ve been eager to finish as soon as possible, but that meant little to no time spent outside of your lab.
Harry shoots you a reassuring smile before you both grab your drinks and head out of the café in the direction of your workplace.
The past three months were one hell of a ride when it comes to Harry. You didn’t hide your dislike towards his continuous presence in your life, standing by your side wherever you went. It frustrated you, made you feel like you didn’t have your freedom any longer even though he never did anything to make you hate him. He was considerate, respectful and only wanted to do his job, yet you still gave him a hard time at the beginning, right until the need for his work was proved.
Two months ago someone broke into your apartment while you were out, they searched through the whole place, looking for something. Well, not just something, they were clearly interested in anything connected to your research, but luckily, you’re not dumb enough to just let these stuff lay around your home.
Even though you didn’t encounter the person responsible for it, the incident still shook your up. Knowing that someone could get into your personal space so easily, that they could have come at a time when you were home and vulnerable, it scared you. Harry was the person that eased the worry and fear in you, he took care of everything in an instant and upon his best advice, you moved to a new apartment with a higher security level. He even moved to the place next to yours so he could be as close to you as possible at all times. There was a much needed shift in your relationship after that and you didn’t see him as an intruder any longer in your life, but more as a hero.
“So would you like Italian or Mexican tonight for dinner?” Harry asks as the two of you enter the building, using your IDs you go through the massive security gates, the guards in post nodding in your way.
“Isn’t it your night to choose?” you smile at him sideways as you wait for the elevator.
“Okay, then Thai,” he smirks, making you laugh. “Hope you are not planning on eating it here again,” he gives you a warning look and you purse your lips.
“I have a lot to do, and—“
“Y/N, you need to rest sometimes,” he scolds you as if you were just a child.
“I do rest. Sometimes,” you answer with an innocent look as the elevator’s door slides open and you walk in with Harry following you right behind.
“Like once a week? Do you even sleep when you’re at home?”
“I do! Don’t make me look like I’m some kind of crazy workaholic!”
“I’m just worried about you, is all,” he sighs, giving you a hard look.
“Oh, Mr. Styles. If I didn’t know you better I would think you might have a soft spot for me,” you smirk at him teasingly before the elevator arrives to your floor and you walk out without a word. Harry just stares after you with a small smile tugging on his lips as he thinks about your words. It’s funny, especially because you both know something more than just a professional relationship has been going on between the two of you, only dancing around it as the situation is a little too complicated to address now.
It’s not like any rules are tying you down, but you would rather not mix up work with your private life. You might have feelings for Harry, but you refuse to act up on them until he is out of his duty as your personal guard.
Your days are usually the same. While you lock yourself up in your lab, working with no end, Harry stay either with you in there or he hovers around the door, keeping an eye on everyone and everything. Just the thought of his presence never fails to bring you a sense of comfort, knowing that you don’t have to worry about your safety until he is near. It might seem nerdy, but you can easily get lost in your work. It doesn’t feel like a job, growing up with parents who were excellent doctors and pharmacists themselves, you were doomed to be a science enthusiast yourself from the beginning. Learning has never been a task for you but a gift, as you liked to look at it.
Working overtime happens often because you lose touch with time easily once you get down to work. Nothing exists outside of your lab and you hardly realize how late it is until Harry usually warns you.
“I didn’t joke when I said I didn’t want to have dinner in here,” he steps into your sanctuary while you’re in the middle of running tests for the millionth time today. Pushing your glasses up to the top of your head while the machines are buzzing and whirling, you look up at him with a tired smile.
“Let me just… finish this one last test and then I promise we’ll head out.”
“Alright, but I’m watching you. No more tests,” he warns, sitting on one of the stools while you finish what you started.
Harry never really asked you about your work, for a while you weren’t even sure if he knows what you’re doing and why it’s so important. It was never discussed at the beginning and he never brought it up later either. But judging from the time he spends near you at the lab he must have picked up a few things about it surely.
The machines stop working and the tiny beeping sound signals that the results are out. You grab the long printed paper and start scanning the data, chewing on your bottom lip as you hope to find what you’ve been looking for all day. The numbers are coming in great, but it’s been like this for a while, it’s the end that never matches up with your expectations. So when you get there and see the graphs showing the result that you’ve been dreaming of since the start of the whole project years ago, your mouth falls open in disbelief even though it’s what you’ve been working for all this time.
“Oh my God,” you whisper.
“What?” Harry’s head snaps up in alert, jumping off the stool.
“I… I did it,” you breathe out, glancing up from the paper. “It’s my first time succeeding, Harry!” you start laughing, the shock taking over your whole body that you really did it this time.
“And what does that mean?”
“Come on, let me show you,” you tell him in excitement, pulling him over to the computer where you pull up all the data you’ve been working on. A virtual version of a cell comes up on the screen as you start typing, modelling what you want to show him. “This is a completely healthy cell, it’s what you are made of too, mostly,” you ass with a chuckle before another cell comes up on the screen. “And this is what cells that are affected by cancer look like.”
The difference is a lot more complicated than what you can explain to him in such a short time, but he can see it with his own eyes. The color, the shape, everything is different from the first one. Harry examines the screen and nods shortly, letting you know that he is following.
“I’ve been working on a substance that is able to not just detect the cancerous cells but it can also kill it effectively without hurting the healthy ones.”
You bring up the virtualized version of the substance you’ve been working on, a short animation showing how it can tell the two cells apart and only attack the cancerous one.
“I haven’t been able to get the numbers above 60% when it comes to succeeding in the process of selection so my whole project was about finding a solution to that. I’ve been trying to find the right substance to mix with our already existing one to solve the problem, but I haven’t been successful in it.”
“I assume until now,” Harry hum and you nod smirking.
“Yeah. The last test results came back very good, quite promising. It’s still not the end of the process, but it’s a huge step.”
“That’s great,” he smiles at you and though you know he probably understands just a fracture of the whole process, he can still figure out how important it is. “Congrats, Y/N.” “Thanks,” you breathe out, pride filling your chest as you shut the computer off. “I guess this is my cue to end the day,” you smile at him before packing up everything, getting ready to finally leave.
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It’s not the first time Harry is spending the evening at your place. You often have dinner together, or watch a movie whenever you get home early enough to do that. Through the time you’ve spent together because of his job you’ve grown to be friends above everything. Good ones, in fact, which is a big deal for you since making friends has never been an easy task for you.
You bought takeout on the way home and as Harry set the table you poured yourself a glass of wine, knowing well Harry would never drink when he is on duty and he is basically working all the time he is with you, so you’re drinking alone. You both sit to the dining table, starting dinner together in a comfortable silence. It’s another thing you appreciate about Harry. He doesn’t try to talk when it’s not necessary, you hate small talk, you’d rather sit in silence than talk about something nonsense and Harry is a partner in that.
“When do you need to leave work tomorrow to get to the party on time?” he asks breaking the silence and you freeze. His eyes fall on you, examining your features for a moment before he smirks. “You forgot about it?”
“I just… thought it’s going to be next week,” you truthfully admit.
“We talked about it last week,” he smirks at you playfully. “And I told you it would be next week which is… this week.”
“I know how the days work, Harry,” you give him a look of ‘give me a break’ before you turn back to your food. “I just…”
“You just forgot it,” Harry finishes for you, and you just roll your eyes at him.
Glancing at him over the table you wonder if he’ll wear something different than is usual attire he always wears. Black suit with a white shirt underneath, the top two buttons left undone, giving you a tiny peek at the tattoos on his chest. You know those are not the only ones, you’ve seen him with the suit jacket off before, the sleeves of his shirt rolled up, his whole left arm is covered in ink and you wish you’ve had the chance to take a better look at them.
Harry is such an intriguing person in a lot of different ways. He definitely likes to keep things to himself, not one to ask for attention and it’s not just because of his work, it’s his personality. However he is good with people, interacting with them, being social. A skill you haven’t really mastered yourself yet and you probably never will. He always seems to know what to say, you’ve never seen him even the slightest bit anxious or nervous before, the confidence he holds is unmatched and it makes it hard to not think about him in ways you shouldn’t be.
After dinner he helps you clean up, just like he always does before heading out, but before he could leave he stops and turns back to face you.
“Oh, a friend of mine is visiting from the UK on Sunday. I already mentioned it to you before, but I was hoping I could get the afternoon off,” he wonders and you nod right away.
“Of course! I’ll be just fine at home,” you smile at him.
“Thank you,” he smiles back before walking out of your place at last.
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Because of the party in the evening you are forced to stop working early the next day. It’s weird to leave the office in broad daylight, but you know today can’t be one of those days when you end up seeing the new day in the lab.
Harry was right yesterday, you completely forgot the whole party thing, meaning you didn’t plan anything ahead and you had nothing to wear, so through the day you called your sister, Mara to help you out. She was more than happy to lend you anything you needed. She meets you at the office, beaming to spend some time with you finally. It’s not that you don’t like her company, but you are quite different, is all. Your sister didn’t get sucked into the world of science, though she definitely has the bright mind to take up on any field she would want to explore. But she was more into the world of art, having written her first fantasy novel at the ripe age of twenty, she is now a bestseller author at only twenty-nine with a bubbly personality and basically every trait you never owned yourself.
“Harry! So nice to see you again!” Mara beams at the man as the three of you meet up at the lobby.
“Hi, Mara,” Harry smiles with a tiny nod.
“Alright, I have everything you could need so let’s head to yours!” your sister cheers before you make your way out to your cars.
Arriving to your home Harry splits from the two of you, letting you to get ready in peace and also to get ready himself. Mara didn’t joke when she said she has everything you need, the trunk of her car is basically filled with clothes and shoes, there’s no chance you won’t find something to wear tonight.
She orders you to take a quick shower as she unpacks everything she brought and when you emit from a cloud of steam with a towel wrapped around your body and one on your head, Mara gets down to work.
“So do you have a date for today?” she curiously asks while she does your makeup.
“Huh, yeah, sure,” you huff ironically. “It’s just gonna be Harry and me.”
“So Harry is your date?” her ears perk up, but you’re quick to protest.
“Of course not! He comes with me everywhere,” you mumble with your eyes closed as she is doing something on your eyelids.
“But it could be a date,” she offers and you huff in disagreement.
“You know that’s not how it works, Mara.”
“You are making it more complicated than it is! No one would blame you if you just… went for it! Harry is obviously an attractive guy.”
“Then maybe you should date him,” you bite back bitterly. Growing up you weren’t the boys’ favorite, they always paid all the attention to your sister. It’s not that you blame her or them, she always had a more capturing and lively personality that attracted people naturally. But it made you wonder if there was something wrong with you, spending all your time with your nose buried in a book or doing researches for fun while Mara was out with her friends, living her best life. Even her published books were inspired by her personal life experiences.
“Y/N,” she sighs, her hands leaving your face so you open your eyes to look at her disapproving expression. “You obviously like him so I would never do that and besides that, he for sure likes you too.”
“What’s not true,” you deny right away, but then you look at her curiously. “But why would you think that?”
Mara smirks at you tilting her head to the side, seeing right through your act that you’re not interested in Harry. Of course you are, but you choose to keep it at bay for the sake of his job.
“Y/N, I see how that man watches every move you make. It’s written all over his handsome face.”
“Of course he watches my every move, that’s his job!”
“No, it’s different. You’ll see it sooner or later,” she smiles before ordering you to close your eyes again so she can finish your makeup.
Mara does wonders to your looks, the makeup look she does on you already makes a huge difference since you don’t bother to do anything on your every days. But she didn’t stop there, she made your hair look like you just stepped off of the pages of a magazine and the dress the two of you chose was the cherry on the top. The emerald green dress was tight around your curves, showing just enough of your body to be still considered modest, but also have some spice. And though there are a lot of advantages of the dress, your first and most important thought (to you at least) was how well it goes with the color of Harry’s eyes.
“I’m a genius,” Mara sighs satisfied with her work as you slip on the pair of nude heels and put your necessities into the little clutch you’re taking with you. Just when you’re gone with everything, the doorbell rings and your heart jumps in your chest, knowing that Harry is standing on the other side of the door.
“I’ll get it for you,” Mara smiles rushing to the door as you walk into the hallway, standing a few feet behind her so as she opens the front door and Harry comes into view, over Mara’s shoulder his eyes easily find your figure standing there, feeling a little awkward and self-conscious, like you are about to go to prom with your crush. Difference is that you are not a teenager anymore and you aren’t going anywhere together together. Tonight is just work for him.
But as his bright green eyes fall on your frame and you see his lips slightly part, you can’t help but allow yourself to think for a moment that it’s more than just work. That he feels the same way about it as you do. Though you don’t voice your hopes and just smile at him faintly, hoping you don’t look completely ridiculous in your outfit.
“Harry, come on in!” Mara invites him into the apartment and he walks in, wearing his usual black suit with the difference of having a tie on around his neck, his white shirt is appearing neat and crispy and his sometimes unruly curls are now gently combed back a little so his curls are not falling into his forehead.
“Hi,” you smile at him nervously fumbling with your clutch as he takes a few steps closer to you.
“Hi. You look… beautiful,” he smiles back at you a little breathlessly as he takes a respectful look down your body before his green irises meet your gaze again.
“Thank you. You look great too,” you chuckle softly. “Should we… head out?”
“Yeah, sure!” he nods, offering you his arm and you link your arm with his instantly, hoping you won’t trip in your heels. “Lock the door when you leave, Mara, alright?” you call out to your sister who is watching you smiling.
“Sure! Have fun!”
You wave at her one last time before walking out and shutting the door closed behind you.
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This party is held every year at Pharma-Z, mostly this is the time when the brain meets the money. Investors and funders like to meet the people behind the million dollars researches from time to time and this is the occasion where both sides show up. Julian always asks you to be social and try to mingle, but the whole thing feels forced and painful for you. You’d rather just be left alone with your researches and projects without having to schmooze to the people who give you the money for your hard work.
It’s held at one of said investors’ luxurious penthouse, that doesn’t even look like someone’s home with the huge outdoors infinity pool, the spacious and modern interiors and the expensive looking decoration that was put up just for the occasion.
“Y/N! I’m so happy you are here!” Julian approaches you with a drink in his hands and you’re happy to see a familiar face in the crowd. You don’t really know others from work, only your little team you directly work with and of course, your boss, Julian.
“It’s not like I had a choice,” you chuckle giving him a short, friendly hug. Julian is far from a nightmare of a boss some people have to face at their job. He is an actually nice and very smart and intellectual person. The pharmaceutical industry can be harsh and dark, the competition between the businesses is way more intent than people think. This is why you need the protection. Some companies profit off of the fact that cancer has no cure yet. They make money from all the treatments that doesn’t even guarantee full recovery. A lot of big fish don’t want the cure, because that would make them lose a good chunk of their income and some of those would even go to the depth of hurting you for being so close to ruining their business with your invention. Pharma-Z is luckily a genuine company that wants to help sick people and that’s why you’re working there.
“You know how important it is for the company,” Julian sighs, but he understands how uncomfortable these events make you feel, though he can do nothing to help you. “Harry, nice to see you again,” he smiles at the man by your side.
“Julian, nice to see you too,” he nods, shaking hands with your boss.
“Mingle a little so people can see and meet you, alright?” Julian requests and you just nod silently before he moves on to the next group of people.
You get yourself a drink to ease your nerves a little as people start approaching you. Some of them you’ve met last year, but there are a lot of new faces. Your project has brought in quite a few new sponsors and investors and now they want to meet you and talk about the research their money is going into.
You try your best to keep a smile plastered across your face as you tell the people the same thing over and over again, receiving praise and compliments on your work before moving onto the next conversation just to start over again.
You can feel your social batteries running out, not sure you can put up with another conversation with a wealthy investor who wants you to know you have a job because they gave money for your project in hopes of you bringing more money to them.
Harry has stayed by your side the whole evening, and you didn’t notice but he kept examining you every few minutes to make sure you were holding up and he noticed how tired you’ve grown from socializing for so long.
“Y/N,” he softly calls out, his palm finding the small of your back. “Why don’t we get some fresh air?” he kindly offers and you immediately understand that he is trying to get you away from the guests and the overwhelming conversations you’ve been dealing with. Nodding you let him usher you outside, finding a spot where the two of you can be a little alone.
“I fucking… hate small talks and being nice to everyone,” you let out a long and heavy sigh, as you lean against the railing, paying just one short glance at the city’s bright lights under your feet. Harry chuckles shortly.
“I figured. You’ve been chewing your lips so hard I was afraid you’d start bleeding.”
Now that he has brought your attention to it, you realize you are doing it again, so you let go of your bottom lip from between your teeth and it brings out another chuckle from Harry.
“I’m just… not good with these… social stuff.”
“I disagree with that,” he hums, furrowing his eyebrows.
“Oh please, if you haven’t realized it, my number of zero friends is a tell, I think.”
“Come on, it’s not zero. You’re friends with Mara.”
“But family doesn’t count, she is kind of forced to be my friend,” you shrug, making him laugh.
“Okay, but I’m your friend too, aren’t I?” You furrow your eyebrows at him.
“You spend time with me because it’s your job.”
His eyes soften on you as he leans against the railing next to you, looking so effortlessly handsome and charming, you almost need to take a deep breath at the sight of him. And the cheeky smile on his pink lips is definitely not helping your case.
“I know you didn’t mean that. You’re a smart woman, Y/N.” Reaching out he tugs a loose strand of hair behind your ear as he inches closer a tiny bit. “I think we stepped over the line of just work.”
“So… you consider me your friend?” you ask shyly.
“If you have to ask maybe I’ve been doing something wrong,” he chuckles softly, making you smile too. Folding your arms a shiver runs down your spine from the cold evening breeze. “Are you cold?” Harry asks, but before you could even say a word, he shrugs his jacket off and drapes it over your shoulders.
“Oh, thank you,” you breathe out shyly.
“Do you want another drink?”
“Yeah, I think I might need another one,” you chuckle and nodding he tells you to just stay there until he gets you a new one.
Turning towards the view, you enjoy the lonely moments for a little, not too keen on going back inside and keep up the façade of interest any longer. You’d rather just head home, maybe have another drink with Harry on your couch while you watch a rerun of whatever show is on TV and then fall asleep after a hot shower. You’ve been working way too much lately and it’s just now crashing down on you. Next week you definitely should cut back on your hours at the lab, the project is already going amazing, it won’t hurt if you actually had some rest before you lose your mind.
You hear footsteps approaching you and you think it’s Harry returning, but as you turn around you are faced with a stranger, a man who is staring down at you with bloodshot eyes and… a gun pointed at you.
Your breath hitches, your blood freezing in your veins at the sight and your legs almost give up underneath you.
“What… who are you?” Your voice comes out as a whisper, tears already flooding your eyes as you melt against the railing as if you had anywhere to go, but you have no chance against him.
One glance at the gun allows you to see that it has a silencer on, with the music coming from inside and no one around, if he shoots you, he’ll be able to get away before anyone realizes what happened.
The man doesn’t answer, just holds up the gun, aiming right at your chest and you close your eyes, thinking that this is it. This is how your life ends, in the middle of a posh party with no one around to help you. Your lips are trembling and hands are shaking as you hold onto the railing, waiting for the inevitable to come, keeping your eyes shut, not wanting to see your killer as the last thing you see before you go.
And then you hear the muffled gunshot, making you scream in fear, your knees turning into jelly, but the pain never comes. Instead, you hear grunting and growling as a body falls to the ground in front of you.
Your eyes snap open and you see Harry straddling the man, the gun lying near your attacker’s hand and he is trying to reach it, but before he could, you kick it away as Harry throws a punch at his face that stops him from trying too hard to free himself.
The next few moments are so busy and blurry at the same time. Your legs give up underneath you, making you fall to the ground, your whole body shaking in waves. In the meantime Harry gets the man into a position where he can be easily controlled and people start flooding out at the scene, helping Harry while security working at the party take the man, the police already on its way.
When Harry can finally step back from the attacker, his eyes fall on your figure and he rushes over to you, kneeling down next to your trembling body, cradling you into his arms upon seeing how shaken up you are.
“Hey, it’s alright. It’s over, you’re alright,” he murmurs, holding you tight as your fists grab onto his shirt, your breathing is uneven, the oxygen barely makes its way into your lungs as you’re panting and gasping from the shock. “Come on, let’s get you inside, Y/N,” he gently tells you, helping you up from the floor even though your body feels like a pile of brick.
You can feel everyone staring at you, whispering behind your back as you try to hide in Harry’s arms while he walks you back inside, away from the man that tried to take your life. He walks you into one of the bathrooms and closing the lid he sits you down to the toilet while he grabs a towel and wetting it he kneels in front of you, tapping the cloth to your cheeks gently. You haven’t even realized that you’ve been sweating from the shock and the coldness feels amazing against your burning skin.
“I’m sorry,” you mumble, but not even you are sure why.
“Nothing to be sorry for, Y/N,” he gently murmurs, giving your hand a squeeze as you shut your eyes closed. He grabs a glass from one of the cabinets and fills it with water handing it over to you.
“Thank you,” you mumble, bringing it to your trembling lips, but before you could drink it, your eyes snap up to meet his gaze. “And thank you for… what you did.” Your voice dies down at the end, the picture of the man pointing the gun at you still living so vividly in your mind.
“No need, it’s my job after all, right?” he chuckles softly, making your lips twitch the slightest bit before you start sipping on the water.
The police show up soon and they arrest the man who refuses to talk. They also request you to give your statement about what happened, but Harry manages to let you just give them the brief story and go in sometime soon to give them your full statement so you don’t have to spend any more time there. They are quite sure the man was hired by someone who doesn’t want you to finish your project, and it’s scary how far some people are willing to go just for the money, just to keep sick people in suffering for their own benefit.
Heading home you stay silent as Harry drives, staring out the window you let the nightlights of the city pass by you while you still see the same face, the face of the man that held a gun at you tonight. The gunshot is still ringing through your ears, it was so close, so real… of course it was real! All of it was real and your life was on the line. If it weren’t for Harry, you wouldn’t be here right now.
Arriving to your home Harry helps you out of the car and you cling onto his hand as you head up to the apartment. He keys the two of you into your home, flicking the lights on and looking around before you go further inside, just to be sure.
“It’s all clear, don’t worry,” he murmurs as you nod and make your way into the bedroom. Kicking your heels off your feet you sit on the edge of the bed, letting out a long breath, feeling your limbs loosening up a bit for the first time in the past hour.
Harry moves around the place doing whatever before he joins you in the room, kneeling in front of you his hands find your bare knees and your eyes meet his worry-filled green irises.
“Do you want to take a shower?” he softly asks and you nod your head. “Come on, I’ll start the water for you.”
He helps you up from the bed and walks you into the bathroom. You stand there awkwardly, not sure what to do as he starts running the water in the walk in shower before he steps back to you.
“Would you…?” you ask, turning around, needing help with the zipper of your dress. Harry clears his throat as his fingers work on it and a moment later the fabric loosens around your frame as you hold it to your chest with your arms. Turning back around you peek up at Harry and you notice the slight blush on his cheeks.
“I’ll be outside at the door, okay?” He whispers, his fingers delicately touching your cheek as you nod before you watch him walk out and close the door behind him.
The hot water feels freshening, like it could burn away the memories even though it’s still so vivid in your mind. You stand under the running water longer than you intended, but it feels nice and needed. Once you’re done, you wrap yourself into a fluffy towel and walk out of the steamy bathroom only to find Harry sitting at the edge of your bed, waiting like a loyal puppy. When he sees you, he stands from his spot and you don’t miss the way his eyes scan over your body that’s barely covered.
“Alright, I’ll go now, but if you—“ “Don’t!” you gasp, panic taking over you at the thought of being left alone. One of your hands grasps his arm to stop him from moving and he freezes in his spot, staring back at your fearful eyes. “Please, stay here,” you plead, voice barely over than just a whisper.
There’s a heartbeat of a pause in him as he is watching you intently and for a moment you think he’ll say no, but then his hand finds yours on his arm and he gives it a gentle squeeze as he nods.
“Okay.”
You let out a long, relieved breath as you ease into comfort. He’s staying, he’ll be with you all night, protecting you from everything and everyone.
“Can I take a shower too?” he asks softly and you nod, stepping to your wardrobe to get him a clean towel. “Thank you. I’ll be back shortly,” he tells you before walking into the bathroom and shutting the door closed behind him.
You hear the water running again and you find yourself standing at the same spot as you listen to the noises coming from the bathroom. Harry is in there, soaking under the water naked and you can’t take your mind off of how badly you want to be there with him.
It’s not just because of what happened tonight, though it made you realize that you don’t have much time to waste. Nothing can assure that you’ll live another day and you don’t want to deny happiness from yourself. You want to be with Harry and as far as you can make it out, he feels the same way.
Upon a sudden decision, you pad your way over to the bathroom door and open it carefully, the warmth immediately hitting your face as you step inside and close it behind you. The glass of the shower is steamed up, you can only make out the blurry frame of Harry in there and you wonder if he heard you come in, but it doesn’t seem like that. His clothes from the night are lying on the floor in a pile, his watch that he always wears is carefully placed next to the sink.
Your hands grab onto the edge of the towel around your body and you unwrap yourself, hanging it up on the wall before stepping to the shower. Hoping you won’t scare him, you open the door, the steam immediately hugging your naked body warmly and you see him standing there with his back facing you as you step into the spacious walk-in shower.
He notices your presence, you see him freeze mid-movement before he peeks over his shoulder, his eyes falling on you as he slowly turns, facing you completely. Standing in front of him completely bare, you feel more vulnerable than ever in your life. You’re scared that he is going to send you away, that he won’t let you get closer to him and if that happens, you’ll feel humiliated, but he just stands there in his naked glory and doesn’t say anything, so you take it as a chance to shoot your shot.
Reaching up your hands slide to his hard chest, up to the base of his neck as you push your front against his, skin to skin with the hot water running down your bodies. His hands find your waist and you could cry from the feeling of his touch on you. Pushing yourself up to your tiptoes your nose nudges against his as your eyes fall closed.
“Y/N,” he breathes out, stopping you right when your lips could meet. Opening your eyes you see the hesitation in his green irises that appear so much darker than they usually do.
“Do you not want it? You don’t want me?” you whisper.
“I do. It’s not that,” he sighs shaking his head slightly. “But you went through a lot today. I don’t want you to make decisions you might regret in the morning.”
You can’t help the small smile that tugs on your lips at how considerate and protective he is over you, thinking that this might be just something that crashed over you in the heat of the moment, but it’s been in the making from the first day you met him. Despite all your protesting against him, you knew you needed him and not just as your guard. He is what’s been missing from your life all along, you just never realized it.
“There’s nothing I could regret when it comes to you, Harry. I needed tonight to open my eyes. Our days are counted, I’m done running from my own happiness.”
He lets out a long, shaky breath as his hands hold tighter onto your waist while your hands run up his neck until your fingers tangle into his wet locks.
“I need you. And not just because of tonight. I’ve always needed you.”
“I’m here, Y/N. I’m all yours,” he breathes out before his lips smash against yours all wet and hard, but it’s the most heavenly feeling you’ve ever experienced.
You become a mess, tangled in each other, lips melting together as your hands explore naked limbs and torsos, bodies pressing tightly against each other shamelessly. Harry walks you backwards until your back hits the cold tile and you let out a whimper as you arch your back at the sudden feeling, just as his head dips down, lips attacking your neck, kissing and nibbling on the soft skin. Your light leg lifts as his hands wander down your thigh, your hips pressing together and you feel how hard he is, his cock pushed against your other thigh, making you moan at the feeling. Reaching down you blindly wrap a hand around the base, giving him a few slow pumps, earning a guttural growl from him before his lips return to yours, kissing you hard and filled with passion. His hands are all over you, on your thighs, ass, back and chest, as if he was mapping your whole body wanting to remember how every inch feels under his touch.
Without tearing his lips away from yours, he blindly reaches behind him, shutting the water off before urging you to jump into his arms, legs wrapping around his waist. He carries you out of the shower, placing you to the counter next to the sink as he stands between your legs, his hands once again finding your breasts as they knead them, making you whimper and shake under his touch. It’s euphoric and addictive, you already know you won’t be able to go a day without feeling him against you like this.
“Bed?” he breathes out against your mouth and you nod eagerly. Reaching to the side he grabs a towel, wrapping it around you, tapping and squeezing you to dry you off, throwing fits of giggles when you grab it and wrap it around his body as well.
The towel falls to the floor abandoned and forgotten as he lifts you off the counter and brings you to the bed, laying you down and holding himself up above you with one arm. His other hand cups your cheek and turning your head you kiss his palm gently, eyes glued to his as he settles between your legs.
“Are you sure about this?” he breathes out, his lips dancing against your cheek and the corner of your mouth.
“Yes! Harry, please!” you beg with a whimper, your whole body aching to feel him inside you.
“I’ve got you, I’ve got you, love,” he kisses you as his hand leaves your heated face, runs down your naked body until his fingers reach your throbbing clit.
He slides two digits through your already wet folds, but just to work you up even more he starts drawing circles on your bud, turning you into a whimpering mess underneath him. Your fingers dig into the lean muscles on his back, feeling them twitch from his movements and one hand sliding down to his ass, grabbing a handful of him while pushing him closer to you, his erection pressing against your core.
“Harry, I need you!” you moan, not able to contain yourself any longer. You need to feel him, you need him as close as possible.
Reaching over to your nightstand you grab a condom from the drawer, ripping the package open with your teeth before you carefully grab his erection and roll the condom down his length, ready to finally feel him inside you.
He flicks his fingers on your clit one last time before his hand wraps around the base of his cock, giving it a few pumps while his soft lips kiss down your jawline and throat, his face hiding in the crook of his neck. Your arms circle around his shoulders, your chest heaving from the sensation as he positions himself just right, the tip teasing your hole. Harry lifts his head up, his bright eyes finding your gaze just as he sinks into you, filling you up perfectly.
“H-Harry! Fuck—“ you gasp at the feeling, your walls stretching around his thick cock as he stays still for a few moments, letting you adjust to his size.
You draw your legs up, giving you more space to go deeper as he starts thrusting, sliding in and out of you oh so perfectly, inching you closer to your relief with each movement. You cup his face in your hands, staring into his eyes as if you could see his soul in them and for a split second, you feel like you actually do. His lips are parted and the cross pendant is grazing your chest while he fucks into you, never falling out of his rhythm.
You want to beg to him not to stop, to keep moving and moving, but no words can leave your mouth as your back arches, your orgasm building up in the pit of your stomach. You start grinding your hips in sync with his, allowing him to reach deeper into you, making your toes curl from pleasure.
“Harry, I’m gonna—I-I’m gonna—Ah!” You can’t make up one coherent sentence as your legs start shaking, feeling your orgasm taking over your body.
“I know, baby. Let it go. Let me make you feel good,” he pants, his lips kissing you everywhere he can reach, your lips smashing against each other in a messy kiss, your tongue meeting his in the middle just when you reach your high.
You moan and cry out his name, fingers digging into his flesh as you chase your release. Seeing you fall apart underneath him is enough to throw him over the edge, spilling himself into the condom as his mouth hangs agape, your name falling off his tongue as if it was the holiest glorification. Combing your fingers through his hair you hold him to your chest as he collapses on top of you, his head lying on your naked chest as you both try to catch your breath in the sudden silence that came over you without the sounds of your passion.
Rolling off of your body he slips out of you, an empty feeling taking over you right away, but he is quick to cradle you into his arms to keep the intimacy. You lay your head to his chest, a thin layer of sweat covering the both of you, but you couldn’t care less. You listen to his steady heartbeat as you draw one of the swallows on his chest with your finger, running it over the lines of the ink. You want to soak in the moment and stay in it for as long as possible, but you can barely keep your eyes open. As Harry’s fingers are gently running up and down your bare back you let your eyes close and the last thing you remember is hearing his soft whisper.
“Don’t worry, baby. I’ll keep you safe.”
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You wake up without an alarm in the morning and it’s the first time for that in a long-long time. You stir and groan before you open your eyes, your hands reaching out next to you, looking for the man that was next to you when you fell asleep, but there’s nothing and no one beside you now.
Panic rises in your chest as your eyes pop open and you frantically look around in the room, hoping to see him somewhere near, but you’re alone.
“Harry?” you call you as you sit up, holding the sheets to your chest since you’re still naked. No answer comes and you can feel your heart rate rising instantly.
Getting out of bed you grab the nearest clothing item you find which is an old hoodie, and you put on a pair of clean panties before you carefully walk out of the bedroom, afraid of what you might find outside, but it’s completely silent and still, no one is around. Harry has left.
“Fuck,” you breathe out, feeling the lump in your throat growing as tears are forming in your eyes.
Where did he go? Why did he leave? Is he coming back? Is he gone forever?
You can’t stop yourself from going into depth you shouldn’t, just because you don’t find him first thing in the morning, but you still haven’t entirely recovered from last night’s events and before you could stop yourself, you are thinking about the worst possibilities there could be.
And then you hear the lock turning in the front door.
Blood rushes out of your head as you freeze, afraid it’s another attacker and this time you won’t be as lucky as you were last night. But as the door opens Harry walks in with a paper bag in his arm and you can’t help, but start sobbing at the sight of him.
“Harry!” you cry out, launching at him and he barely have time to put the bag down before he catches you, locking you in his strong arms.
“Hey! No need to worry, it’s just me!” he soothes softly, his hands running up and down your back and head. “I’m sorry I scared you, just wanted to get you something to eat, baby,” he murmurs, kissing the side of your head as you try your best to hold back your sobs.
“I just woke up alone and I thought…”
“I’m sorry, baby. I shouldn’t have left while you were sleeping. But I’m back and I’m alright.”
You just nod, hugging him a little longer before you loosen your hold around him to lean back and look him in the eyes.
“So… you’re staying? With me?”
“If you want me to, yes,” he nods with a soft smile as he cups your tear-soaked face in his hands. “I’ll keep you safe and sound and I’ll be whatever you need me to be.”
“Just be yourself and… be with me,” you shyly ask him and he nods, his smile growing into a wide grin before he leans down and captures your lips in a sweet, intoxicating kiss.
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dootdootwriting · 3 years ago
Note
CONGRATS FOR 600+!!! I SAW UR EVENT SO IF I HAVE THE CHANCE, IM TAKING IT
The whole alphabet for Thoma. (Gn reader)
PLEASE dont overwork yourself though. You dont have to do it all if youre tired or something. Thank you and congrats!
600+ writing event
ty for ur request anon!! also you're funny. overwork myself? how could i possibly do that when i'm already avoiding all of my schoolwork? entire alphabet for thoma coming right up! (under the cut for length)
fluff alphabet with thoma; gn reader; no warnings apply
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A-Activities (what do they like to do with their s/o? How do they spend their free time with them?)
- thoma enjoys pretty much any type of shared activities with you, but ultimately his favorite kind is any that involves food. he'll go on tours of inazuma city with you to find the best places to get ice cream, or he'll buy a whole bunch of food and see what kind of dishes you can make together! nine times out of ten it ends up being really weird and a little gross, but it's fun and he loves spending time with you.
B-Beauty (what do they admire about their s/o? what do they think is beautiful about them?)
- he admires your ambition, your humor, and your own personal flair. he loves the person you are, and almost everything that goes into that, but he specifically loves the unique little traits that make you you.
C-Comfort (how would they help their s/o when they feel down/have a panic attack etc.?)
- his first instinct is to give you a big hug or rub your back, but only if he knows you're okay with it and that it would actually help. his first goal is to make sure you're okay, and then his second goal is to cheer you up: with bad jokes and kisses, usually
D-Dreams (how do they picture the future with their s/o?)
- thoma isn't super picky with how you two end up in the future, as long as you're together and happy. he wants to grow old with you, ideally, though however you do that will decide itself.
E-Equal (are they the dominant one in the relationship or rather passive?)
- thoma is used to taking the lead in your relationship, but he's not necessarily more dominant or anything - he's just excited to be with you and wants to make sure you're just as happy as he is. your relationship is pretty balanced!
F-Fun (what do they do for fun with their s/o? what's their idea of a fun day out?)
- he loves loves loves going out on walks, especially in the city, and just finding random things that seem fun to do. there are a bunch of people playing cornhole over there, how about you guys join in for a game? they're selling a new kind of hotpot at that restaurant, better give it a try!
G-Gratitude (how grateful are they in general? Are they aware of what their s/o is doing for them?)
- he's definitely aware of everything you do for him, and he's also very grateful that you're with him. he makes sure to let you know that every day.
H-Honesty (do they have secrets they hide from their s/o? Or do they share everything?)
- i think the only time thoma would ever keep something from you on purpose is if it would be somehow dangerous for you to know. other than that, he likes to make sure you're aware of everything you need to be. he likes his privacy like anyone else, but he also values communication.
I-Inspiration (did their s/o change them somehow, or the other way around? Like trying out new things or helped them overcome personal problems?)
- being with you hasn't necessarily changed him (aside from the fact that you two are almost always seen together now) but it's definitely improved his mood a lot, not that it was ever really bad. he also likes to show off more now that you're around...
J-Jealousy (do they get jealous easily? How do they deal with it?)
- thoma gets jealous relatively easily but is also not one to step in unless it's a situation in which you seem uncomfortable. he trusts you wholeheartedly, which sometimes means he has to keep himself from getting overly worried.
K-Kisses (are they a good kisser? What was the first kiss like?).
- he's a very good kisser. thoma's kisses are playful and sweet, or alternatively full of reassurance and love. your first kiss was a little rushed and he was a little nervous (not that he'd ever admit that) but he knew it was the right time.
L-Love confession (how would they confess to their s/o?)
- confesses accidentally while watching you do something that's actually pretty normal. you tap him on the shoulder and ask where he wants to go for lunch and he just kinda stares at you and then says "man i love you" and you're like. what. but he plays it off like he TOTALLY MEANT to say that and definitely didn't slip up.
M-Mornings (what's it like waking up with them? do they sleep late or wake up before the sun rises?)
- lazy lazy lazy. thoma knows he has to go to work but why would he do that when you're next to him all curled up into him? he can't just abandon you like that! fortunately the kamisatos are very forgiving, so when he shows up late they don't give him an earful.
N-Nicknames (what do they call their s/o?)
- babe/baby, sunshine, and occasionally sweetheart but usually just to tease you
O-On cloud nine (what are they like when they are in love? Is it obvious for others? How do they express their feelings?)
- when thoma first realizes he's in love with you it hits him like a truck and he has to sit down for a second to process it. after that he hangs around you a lot more often, and it's pretty obvious to anyone watching that he's in love.
P-PDA (how are they with PDA? is it fun to them or are they more reserved with their affection?)
- thoma's comfortable with pda and likes to tease you with it sometimes, unless you're someone who absolutely hates it, in which case he'll settle with handholding. otherwise, he'll give you random light kisses on the cheek or will grab you and pull you into him at random points throughout the day.
Q-Quirk (some random thing they do when they're with you for no reason in particular)
- his nose scrunches when he's trying not to laugh at you, which makes you laugh at him, which makes him laugh at you. congratulations! you have achieved pile of laughter.
R-Romance (how romantic are they? What would they do to make their s/o happy? Cliché or rather creative?)
- thoma is very romantic and also values friendship with his partner as well. he's sort of a mix between cliché and creative - while he will definitely take you out for a fancy dinner and lend you his jacket, he will also take you out to the lake and push you in or make a date out of who can spot the most dogs on a day out.
S-Support (are they helping their s/o achieve their goals do they believe in them?)
- one hundred percent he believes in you and will do his best to help you achieve any goals you have. ok thats the end of this headcanon i have nothing else to say GHCCN
T-Thrill (do they need to try out new things to spice out your relationship or do they prefer certain routine?)
- thoma loves trying new things! he doesn't need things to change constantly (and also that might be very tiring for him) but he does like to switch things up a little.
U-Understanding (how good do they know their partner? Are they empathetic?)
- forgot to change it from "good" to "well." WHOOPS. anyway
- thoma is very empathetic, so he's quick to understand how you're feeling, though it'll take him a little longer to understand why it is you're feeling like that. once you explain to him, he knows just what to do, whether it be celebrate with you on a big win or comfort you or give you some space.
V-Value (how important is the relationship to them? What is its worth in comparison to other things in their life?)
- it's SO important to him. having you in his life is one of the most important things to him. he's also been with the kamisatos for a really long time though, so thoma will need a little bit to sort out where his priorities are. rest assured that you're definitely up there.
W-Wild card (a random fluff headcanon?)
- thoma really likes the feeling of you running your fingers through his hair. bonus points if you wash it for him (he'll return the favor)
X-XOXO (Are they very affectionate? Do they love to kiss and cuddle?)
- if you're ever available for affection, thoma will take advantage of it. he loves being close to you and generally just the feeling of loving and being loved in return, especially when that incorporates physical affection. listen he just really likes being kissed.
Y- Yearning (how will they cope when they are missing their partner?)
- when you're gone thoma will surround himself with things that remind him of you. he'll also occasionally call your name or say things to you absentmindedly before remembering you're not there at present. poor guy... he'll be very happy once you're home.
Z-Zeal (are they willing to go to great lengths for the relationship? If so, what kind?)
- it depends on the lengths. the worst case scenario for thoma would be if he somehow had to choose between you and his work - that would terrify him, even though there's no way it would ever happen. other than that, since you're way up on his priority list, there's not much that he wouldn't do for you.
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slowly-writing · 4 years ago
Text
Short
Natasha Romanoff x Daughter!Reader
Avengers x Romanoff!Reader
Word count: 1.4K
Requested by anon: Little widow is super short and all the avengers find it adorable.
A/N: as someone who is 5’11” (180cm) I did the best I could with this one. I apologize if it’s not very accurate 
“Woah! Let me grab that, y/n,” Steve says as he wraps one arm around your waist, the other hand grabbing the box of granola bars you were climbing for.
“I almost had it,” you whine as he sets you down.
“Yeah sure. Almost had a concussion is more like it,” Tony teases and you glare.
“I had everything under control. I was almost tall enough to reach it,” you cross your arms over your chest and your mom coughs to cover a laugh.
“You were balancing on a stool that was teetering on one leg on your…” she pauses to pick up the book, “biology textbook. Great, glad you’re getting some use out of that.”
“Yeah well, it won’t tell me why I haven’t hit my growth spurt yet, so at least it’s good for something,” you shrug, grabbing it from her hands and shoving it in your bag.
“Kid, don’t you think you’re a little old-“
“Don’t!” You cut Tony off. “I am not too old for a growth spurt. I don’t care how old I am. I refuse to be 5’1 for the rest of my life.”
“Alright,” he raises his hands in surrender and you roll your eyes.
“Whatever. I’m gonna be late for school.”
“Have a good day,” your mom calls.
“Try not to get mistaken for a freshman again,” Clint’s words are acknowledged by way of you flipping him off as you make your way out the door.
xxxxx
“Here,” Peter appears behind you, grabbing the textbook you were jumping for.
“Thanks,” you grumble and he grins.
“Are you sure you don’t want to switch lockers? It’s killing my back to crouch down to the lower ones anyway. Jumping doesn’t seem like the most effective use of your locker,” he offers for the tenth time and you shake your head.
“I’m fine! I can reach it all!”
“Yeah when I use my powers for you,” Wanda’s voice calls and you turn, glaring.
“Whole lot of help you were this morning. Steve’s convinced I almost broke my neck climbing for my breakfast,” you whine and she chuckles, placing a kiss on the top of your head.
“My deepest apologies. I’ll just skip my morning training with Agent Hill. I’m sure that would go over just fine,” she teases and you roll your eyes, leaning into her nonetheless.
“You just gotta get on her good side. I get to do my training after school instead of before,” you smirk and she rolls her eyes.
“That’s because she’s known you since you were three and therefore treats you like family. Not an agent,” Wanda retorts and you just shrug.
“Ya know, it’s  the 21st century,” Peter’s still stuck on the previous topic and you shake your head. “I don’t think scavenging for food is supposed to be a life threatening process anymore. Cause like, evolution and all that,”
“Well y/n’s evolution didn’t get the message,” Wanda responds and you smack both their shoulders.
“You guys suck,” you whine and Wanda laughs.
“We’re only teasing, love. You’re adorable. We have to tease you to compete for some attention. You’re too cute to look away from.” You eye Wanda for a few moments.
“I can’t tell if that was supposed to be patronizing or not, but it’s too early to analyze all that, so I’m gonna go with thank you as my response,” you tell her, standing up on your toes and pulling her down by the collar of her shirt to kiss her cheek.
“You can’t even reach your girlfriend's face to kiss her,” Peter chokes out through a laugh.
“At least I have a girlfriend,” you try to jab back but he brushes right over it.
“Say, have you ever been on a roller coaster before? Or do you not measure up yet?” He says and you lunge for him. He quickly places a hand on your forehead, holding you back where your arms can’t reach him. You can feel your cheeks heat up as Wanda tries her best to hide her laugh behind you. You hit his elbow, making his arm buckle, and pull it over your shoulder. You use his weight against him as he stumbles forward and throw him over your shoulder.
“Holy shit,” Wanda breaths out.
“How the hell did you do that?” Peter asks as he catches his breath and you shrug.
“Did you forget who my mom is? I learned how to do that when I was 8. We were literally talking about my training like 30 seconds ago,” you call over your shoulder as you take Wanda’s hand and pull her to class.
xxxxxx
What’s up losers?” Mj asks as she joins your group.
“We’re thinking about heading to the tower to study for the geometry test next week, wanna come?” Peter asks, unphased by MJ’s snarkiness. Loser is pretty much a term of endearment in her book.
“Plus it’s movie night  if you guys wanna crash it. Fair warning though, it’s Steve’s turn to pick so it’ll probably be old as hell,” you add in and Ned nods.
“Sounds awesome! I’ll watch an old movie if it means hanging with the avengers!” His enthusiasm brings a smile to your face, though it’s quickly knocked off as MJ uses your head as an armrest.
“I’m in,” she says and you glare up at her, elbowing her in the ribs.
“Too bad, you’re not invited anymore,” you say angrily and she laughs.
“Anyone else feel like they’re being yelled at by a middle schooler when she’s mad?” She teases again and Wanda quickly wraps her arms around your shoulders, pulling your back into her chest.
“But she doesn’t fight like a middle schooler, Peter learned that the hard way this morning. So let’s lay off before someone ends up with a black eye, alright?” Wanda says calmly and you sink into her embrace. You grab one of her hands from where they’re laced together by your chest and start playing with the rings on her fingers.
“I don’t look like a kid,” you mumble and you feel Wanda place a kiss on the top of your head.
“Of course you don’t” she reasures you.
“Yeah, totally. The whining totally helps your case Romanoff,” Peter adds and you glare as you all make your way out of the school.
xxxxx
“Race to the movie room?” Peter suggests and Ned frowns.
“But y/n’s like, short as hell, no offense,” he says and you laugh at his innocent look, “how is that fair.”
“Don’t worry Ned. I’ll manage,” you say before Peter takes off everyone else following suit. THey weave around the furniture and you smirk, placing your hand on the back of the sofa and throwing yourself over it. One foot lands on the coffee table and you use it to push off of, grabbing the pull up bar in the doorway that Steve insisted needed to be in the common room (you still think it’s cause he likes to show off) and doing an elegant flip, laning in front of the door to the movie room with a bow.
“Seriously, how the hell do you do that kind of stuff?” MJ asks, slightly out of breath, but still smiling since she beat Peter.
“What part of ‘raised by an assassin’ isn’t clicking for you guys?” you ask and a voice behind them draws their attention.
“Hey, I stopped being an assassin long before I started raising you,” your mom argues and you just shrug.
“Doesn’t make you any less paranoid or scary. You’re the one who insisted I needed to know how to defend myself, so I’m simply reaping the benefits,” you say with a grin, leaning into Wanda who is rolling her eyes at your antics.
“I seem to remember you begging me to train you so you could go on missions,” your mom counters with a raised eyebrow. Before you can respond Tony’s voice comes from the room you just vacated.
“Why the hell is there a footprint on my table?” He yells and you all freeze.
“Maybe if we’re quiet he won’t know we’re here?” Ned whispers, but even he sounds unsure of the plan.
“I can see the pile of backpacks by the elevator. When I find out whose foot was on my table they’re grounded. I don’t care if you’re not my children,” Tony yells again.
“Race you to...anywhere but here!” you whisper-yell before taking off, the four teenagers hot on your trail as your mom rolls her eyes behind you.
tag list: @rvgrsbrns @rororo06 @prizmix-and-friends @worlds-in-words @im-salt-but-not-salty @5aftermidnightdaily-blog @riotmaximoff @xxxtwilightaxelxxx 
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raebayhc · 4 years ago
Text
Girls Night Out
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PART TWO!!!
warnings: smut, oral sex (f), fingering, public sex acts, car sex, use of alcohol, manipulation
word count: 2070
summary: you along with your groups of friends decide to have a girls' night for the first time in a while, things get heated and your friends end up taking turns using your body.
series: part 1 (more parts to come)
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Finally making your way through the crowd you make it back to the group of girls who had already begun to drink. Mikasa’s hand finds purchase on your waist as she pulls you closer to hand you a drink “it’s fruity, you’ll like it” Mikasa knew you weren’t a heavy drinker but when you did drink you preferred fruitier things, you giggled at the thought of her ordering something so girly with the sole intent on giving it to you. You happily took the drink from her hand giving her a warm smile, taking a sip she watches your reaction as your face lights up “holy shit mik- this is awesome” she takes a sip of her rich colored drink “let me taste” you obliged as you held your glass up for her, she goes to hand you her drink but you decline “no thanks, that stuff tastes like rat poison.. I’m better off with my drink from paradise” you laugh, she lets out a small chuckle at your cuteness “just try it y/n I promise it’s not that bad”.. “Ughhhhhh fiiiiiine only because it’s you mik” you reply hesitantly. You both lift your drinks to the mouth of the other, not breaking eye contact you take a sip, and as does she, almost as if it was planned yall both swallow squint grunt then let out a small cough a visual representation of how yall felt about each other’s drinks “how do you drink this shit?? Bleh” Mikasa spits out “it’s better than the jet fuel you have in this glass” you shiver out.
The night goes on and all of the ladies are around the bar talking, yall somehow landed on your childhood and how yall used to run around outside all day and play in the woods behind your neighborhood. Mikasa continues to tell the story of how yall have matching scars on the same place at the top of your inner thigh from when yall collided bikes one time as if she needed proof she lifted your skirt to look at the scar, a reminder maybe, “see! Told yall it really happened and I have the same exact one too!” she lets your skirt back down and the girls disperse throughout the building, some dancing, some talking to guys for potential hookups. You and mik still at the bar talking. She cuts your sentence short “wait actually let me see your scar again I think it shrunk” without getting confirmation from you she lifts your skirt and underestimating the length it would take for her to reach the scar she overshot and instead of rubbing the scar she rubs the thigh right against one of your folds, a small whimper falls out of your throat, you didn’t mean to let it out it just kind of happened. Your stomach drops, her eyes dart up to your face, a deep blush forming that you can’t control. She cocks an eyebrow at you and slowly begins to move her hand up closer and closer to your sex, your grip on the bar counter becoming tighter “mik what the fuck are you doing” you spit out through gritted teeth. “I haven’t stopped thinking about earlier… yah know when we basically kissed in the theatre, I haven’t gotten you out of my mind since.” her words lit a flame in you, not only because of how seductive they were but because you were definitely attracted to her, you always have been but you would never dare to speak on it.
“I’ve kept this to myself for far too long don’t you think?” she asks, not able to push out any words fearing you would instead release a moan you nod, your eyebrows scrunched on your forehead, your bottom lip tucked between your teeth, eyes glossy, nipples erect and visible through your thin shirt….. She couldn’t help herself. Slipping a finger into your underwear she groans at how wet you already are “all this… for me baby?” she purrs into your ear. “Mik…. we’re at a bar, there are people everywhere… please..” you whine out, she replies with a simple “trust me”, grabbing your jaw and forcing you to face her she grabs her drink opens your mouth and pours it in “spit it out or swallow it and you’ll regret it” you wince and nod your head obediently “good girl” she purrs.
Now basically crumbling under her touch your thighs are shaky, breathing erratic as you can only breath through your nose due to the rich liquid sheltered in your mouth. She positions her fingers to shape a gun, she then points her ‘hand gun’ at you and ‘pulls the trigger’ taking that same position she pushes into you, knowing you would react to this she lets out a loud cough to cover your moan, thank goodness she did. You’re vocal she likes that. Now pushing in and out of you she takes her left hand and grabs your neck then pulls you to kiss, her tongue prodding at your lips signaling you to open for her, the deep liquid flows into her mouth dripping down your chins, she swallows the liquid but remains in contact with your face against her occasionally biting or sucking on your lip. You knew there were definitely going to be marks later but you didn’t care, this was pure bliss and just the thought of Mikasa getting aroused by this was enough to send you over the edge, your vision gone blurry, your body shaking, reaching your climax. You droop your head down breathing heavy, worried she had crossed a line Mikasa lifted your head only to see a blissful fucked out expression, eyes hazy, drool falling down your chin, your mouth in a slight smirk, tears threatening to fall. “Oh, shit” she mumbles now fully aware of the effect you have on her.
Removing her fingers from under your skirt she dips her fingers in your drinks and encourages you to take them in your mouth which you do without a fight, a low groan escapes your lips as you taste the sweet and salty mixture of your juices, her sweat, and your ‘drink from paradise’ on her digits. Pulling her fingers out with a loud ‘pop’ she pulls a napkin from under her drink and wipes them off. Still recovering from the previous climax you sit there catching your breath, Mikasa’s hand finds its way to the small of your back, she leans into your neck giving you small pecks then comes up to your ear and nibbles on it a bit “.... y’know… there’s so much more I want to do to you.. Bee.” your skin shivers at the name she had given you when yall were in the sixth grade after you got chased by a bee into a creek, you hadn’t heard it in years… she really was something.
You only had one drink so you were nowhere near tipsy, sober as can be….. Unfortunately that cant be said for some of the other ladies. Ymir, Sasha, and Hitch were all out of it fortunately enough you, mikasa, and historia were all sober so yall could drive, you decide to take responsibility for hitch and drive her to the barn. You put her arm around your shoulder “shit. Why the fuck are you so heavy hitch, youre tiny” you spit out struggling to support her weight on you as you walk her to the car “h- hey-*hiccup* hey. Im not heavy I just had done a cartwheel sometimes earlier when she asked me to”. Yup. she’s out of if you think, you’re on the road and on the way to Sasha’s family barn when hitch yells at you to pull into an empty parking lot so she can get air a possibly throw up. Y’know the basic drunk shenanigans. You pull over to what seems to be a deserted parking lot with a raccoon and some dead bushes “okay hitch hurry up�� “yeah yeah I’m going I’m going” she seems to have sobered up a bit.. *click* the passenger door opens and the car lights come on “hurry up they’re wai-” you’re cut off by the image in front of you. Wearing nothing but her underwear hitch had removed all of her clothing including her bra revealing her numerous piercings including a belly button and nipple piercings, not only that but she had one hand down her panties moving around doing what you assume is masturbating and her other hand squeezing her nipple “mmph please..please.. Help me will you pretty girl?” butterflies filled your stomach “what’re you-”
Hitch climbs halfway in with her hand on the middle console and one of her knees on the passenger seat, grabbing the collar of your shirt she pulls you in for a sloppy kiss, your grip on the wheel loosens as you lose yourself in the kiss, not only that but you notice she doesn’t taste of alcohol, not even the slightest bit. In fact, you remember about a month ago when she said she was gonna stop drinking and when yall were in the club you only saw her with cans of soda when you did happen to catch a peek of her.. Was she- “faking?” your thoughts cut off by her sudden comment “you know you’re really easy to read y/n, I can tell what’s going on in that pretty little brain of yours honey.” “so were you? Faking I mean.” you say in a confused tone as if you were trying to piece it all together yourself “yeahhhhh sorry but I had to get you alone somehow, don’t think I didn’t notice how Mikasa and historia were all over you tonight, it wasn’t rocket science to figure out they probably fucked you..and to be honest I’ve thought about us together. So please… have me?” she takes your hand and shoves it down her panties, black and lacey, you retract your hand and look at her without saying anything. Worried she might have done something wrong she begins “oh my god I got the wrong idea y/n I’m so so sor-” “get in the back” you cut her off.
Climbing in the back she waits on instructions from you, you join her in the back. You position yourself on top of her laying her head on the back door, you scan over her helpless body so small and fragile under your touch, starting by kissing her breasts leaving marks on the sides of them you move down to her torso. Giving sweet and soft kisses occasionally leaving a hickey or two, you make it down to her covered pussy, kissing above the lacey garment you tease her. “Please y/n please please please I can’t” she begs “I got it I got it” you pull her underwear to the side she releases a sigh of relief not long after followed a scream of pleasure as you plunge your face into her sex, lapping up whatever juices are flowing and gently sucking on the bundle of nerves at the top. “N-not so.. fast y/n... I won’t… I won’t last!!” she manages out through broken whimpers and cries, which only encourages you to break her even more, make her cry out an orgasm, make her the best little pet you could ask for. You stick a ring and middle finger inside of her while your mouth focuses on her clit, not that pushes her over the edge. Her mind blanks and all she can see is white, you speed up to enhance her orgasm, you’re then met with the strong bursts of fluid that fall from her. “She’s a squirter huh” you think to yourself hungrily lapping up as many juices as possible, “mmhmm y/n y/n y/n ahh please you’re so-” her body twitches “you’re so amazing mmm”. You remove your fingers and place her panties back where they belong, sitting up adoring her aroused figure you spit out “you think you’d top me huh?” followed by a cheeky grin and a condescending giggle.
The car lights up and a ring echoes “Ymir” flashes on the dashboard “incoming call”...
THE EEENNNDDD pt.2
AHHHHHH IM SO OVERWHELMED BY THE POSITIVITY AND LOVELY FEEDBACK I LOVE YALL AWHHHH!!! I will continue to write and upload for this series!! Thank you for the patience *muah*
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wienerbarnes · 4 years ago
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Italian Heart
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Pairing: Bucky x Italian!MobBoss!Reader
Word Count: 4,867
Warnings: canon level violence, possible inaccurate italian slang lol
A/N: ive been watching a lot of the sopranos lately and i feel like ive never seen a bucky x mob boss reader au (ive only rlly seen em where buckys the mob boss. if there are ones where reader is the mob boss PLS SEND EM TO ME I BEG) a lot of the slang and mob stuff here is from sopranos bc... im not in the fucking mafia so forgive me anyway enjoy :)<3
MAIN MASTERLIST
Bucky’s never seen a woman quite like yourself.
Dressed in expensive satin and jewelry that hangs between your breasts, an angry look on your face at the fact you’re sitting before him and Sam in an interrogation room in the tower. Freshly done nails, clean and crisp lipstick, spicy perfume, and an expression of annoyance.
As put together as you look, you don’t look like someone to be fucked with. Which, he supposes is good for a mobster; the Boss of Newark.
Looking at you, though, he’d never thought you to be such a figure of intimidation. While the mafia is still alive, despite how the media tries to deny this, he always pictured an old Italian man that chain smokes cigars. He doesn’t think he’s too far off, to his credit; he can smell the remnants of smoke on you.
“Mind if we make this fast? My cousin’s comin’ for dinner and I was gonna make ziti.” You huff, crossing your legs under the table.
“Sounds delicious. Sorry for dragging you all the way out here.” Sam says, a calm look on his face even though he’s well aware of what you’re capable of.
When hunting down the last traces of the super soldier serum, he never thought Nick Fury himself would suggest getting in touch with you. He didn’t think it was worth the time to question how the two of you knew each other.
Theft. Drugs. Murder. Bribery. The list goes on, and there’s not a single thing that ties you to any of it.
A shrug of your shoulders, “So, what exactly is this about?” You ask.
“What is it that you do for a living?” Sam asks.
“I work in waste management.” You respond, a rehearsed answer.
Not exactly a lie, the environmental facility you manage is one of hundreds of covers used by your crew for your crimes. Environmental facilities, deli shops, strip clubs, auto shops. There isn’t a business in Jersey you aren’t tied to.
“Waste management? Like, garbage disposal?” Bucky asks, knowing exactly what it is you do for work.
You smirk, “Yeah, we dispose of garbage sometimes. What’s that got to do with me being here?”
“It’s to my understanding that you’re in the business of… buying and selling things. You and… the people you hang around got a real knack for it.” Sam tells you.
Bucky holds back a roll of his eyes. More like stealing and selling. Expensive Italian suits, antique watches, cars, electronics, illegal cigars. Who knows what else.
“I don’t know where you heard that… but I’m a popular gal, maybe I know a guy who might know a guy. What are you lookin’ for?” You ask.
You know this game, after being in the mob for so long. After being a part of your own crew for years, your patience and hard work paid off, working your way up to a captain and finally a boss. It didn’t take you long to learn in this business that government officials are jokes. Always wanting to bust my balls and then come crying to my corner for help, it’s a bunch of ugatz.
“Serums.” Bucky finally speaks.
A laugh escapes you, “What, like vitamin C?” You teasingly smirk at him.
His chair makes a loud sound in the small room as he pushes it back harshly and stands, resting his hands on the table in between the two of you. You don’t flinch.
“Enough with the bullshit. Super serums. To create super soldiers. We need to get them before they end up in the wrong hands and make a big ass mess.” He snaps at you, but you don’t seem phased in the slightest. In fact, you seem rather amused.
“You must have a lot of agita with all that anger, Sergeant Barnes.”
He doesn’t hold back this time and rolls his eyes before you speak up again, “Your first name is James, isn’t it? Ain’t that Italian?”
“No, it’s English. Or Scottish. Or Jewish - I don’t know, who cares? Are you gonna help us or not?” Bucky takes his seat again, crossing his thick arms over his broad chest.
“What’s in it for me?” You ask, leaning back in your chair.
“Not being arrested for all the shit we know you’re caught up in.” Sam offers.
You roll your own eyes this time, “I’ll take my chances. Thanks for wasting my time, boys, don’t let it happen again.” You stand, prepared to make your way back to the train station to go back to Jersey.
“Wait,” Sam stops you, “What is it that you want?”
You smile innocently and take your seat again, taking a minute to think before answering, “My little sister’s a big fan of yours. I’m sure she and all her friends would think it’s cool if you showed up to her prom as her date.” You wink at Sam.
Silence fills the room as the men think about your request.
“You’re gonna do it, right?” Bucky looks over at him and sees Sam rubbing the crease in between his eyes. He was expecting you to ask for immunity, protection, money, guns. But after hearing your request, he supposes you have enough of all that stuff anyway.
“Man -” Sam begins to refuse.
“Sam, it’s a fucking school dance in exchange for some of the most powerful and sought after serums on the planet - go to the fucking prom.” He tells him, eyebrows scrunching in confusion as to how he would hesitate on something so simple.
“She’s eighteen, so you won’t have any problems with the media or none of that.” You add, the information not really making Sam feel any better.
“Alright, alright, fine. I’ll go to the dance with your sister if you help us get these serums.”
You smile, happy to have done business with the two men, “What information do ya got for me?”
Bucky and Sam wait outside a back room in the facility you own. They passed the garbage trucks parked neatly outside, but could hear your screaming and the smell of Cuban cigars as soon as they entered the building.
She’s with a customer, they were told, by someone in your crew, them meeting Bucky’s expectations for mobsters more than you did. None of them ask any questions, but Bucky and Sam aren’t stupid, they’re sure your crew is aware of what’s going on and know the exact reason they’re there.
“You’re a fuckin’ asshole, you know that? The Bible says, Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit -”
“You listen to me, you take your Bible and your quotations book and shove it up your fat fucking ass! Now get the fuck out of my face!”
Bucky can’t help but scoff listening to you scream at whoever’s inside. Sam elbows him, silently telling him that now isn’t the time to find your work funny, especially not in front of the rest of your crew.
Bucky knows he’s old-fashioned, and while things that were taboo such as body modifications or certain fashion styles don’t phase him anymore, he doesn’t think he’ll ever get used to hearing a woman talk like that. He doesn’t think he’s ever even heard anybody talk like you do.
Suddenly a man bursts out of the room, huffing and puffing, and you walk slowly behind him, as if to make sure he makes it outside okay.
“Grab his plate for me, will you?” You say not to anyone in particular, voice smooth and calm as if you hadn’t been yelling and threatening that man’s life for the past twenty minutes.
One of the men from your crew follows outside, seemingly to collect the license plate of the man who just left.
“Nothing’s gonna happen to that guy, right?” Sam asks as he and Bucky enter the room, taking a seat in front of the desk you have in there. He knows there’s no point in asking, that you’ll do whatever you want regardless because it’s obvious you’re passionate about receiving respect, but it was worth a shot.
“Is that what you came all the way to Jersey to ask me? Christ, I’m fuckin’ starving, you boys want anything to eat?” You ask, accent heavy as you reach into the side drawer of your desk and pull out what seems to be some kind of meat wrapped in paper.
“Gabagool?” You offer to them, picking out a slice for yourself and placing it in your mouth.
“Gesundheit.” Sam responds.
“It’s pork, you asshole.”
Bucky silently reaches over and picks off a slice of the cured cold cut, putting the meat in his mouth and savoring the flavor. While he can’t stand the way you make a living or the sailor’s mouth you have, he loves Italian food, and actually chose a neighborhood in New York that has plenty of traditional cold cut markets and restaurants to live in in order to fulfill his cravings.
“There’s a big party staged downtown this weekend, we think that’s when the drop is going to happen.” Sam tells you, bringing the focus to their reason for coming here in the first place.
“I’ll send one of my boys.” You reply in between your chews.
“That wasn’t the deal. The deal was you get the serums.” Bucky speaks up.
“Buck, you know how many people want her dead?” Sam tries to reason.
“What the fuck do I have a crew for then? - No, if pretty boy wants me to do it myself, then I will. The same people that want my head are the same fucks who are terrified to be within twenty feet of me in fear they’ll make eye contact. I’m not scared of nothin’.” You say, narrowing your eyes at Bucky.
“What did you guys come here to talk about?” You ask.
Sam looks confused at your expression, “...To go over the plan? Hash out details? So you know how everything’s gonna go?”
“I’ll be fine; I’ve seen The Godfather once or twice,” You tell him, wrapping up the cappo, after Bucky picks off one last slice, and replacing it in the drawer, “Don’t worry Captain, this ain’t my first rodeo. I’ll get the serums for you.” You open a different drawer and pull out a cigar and a lighter.
Bucky watches as you place the large cigar in between your red-painted lips, bringing the flame of your lighter to the end and hollowing your cheeks until smoke exits from the corner of your mouth. Bucky feels blood travel south as his eyes glaze over your hand grab the cigar out of your mouth and blow out a long string of smoke.
“I guess we’ll be in touch then,” Sam stands and Bucky follows after.
“My sister’s wearing blue, so find yourself a nice tie.” You call out, lifting your feet up to cross them on the desk, dress rising and showing your legs.
Bucky blushes, and then laughs as he exits when he hears you, in a deep and more exaggerated accent than your own, “Just when I thought I was out… they pull me back in!”
The morning of the party, Sam and Bucky pick you up from your house, planning to take you into New York to discuss final details before tonight.
You get in the passenger seat, Sam offering it to you and climbing in the backseat. As Bucky begins to drive off, your phone rings.
“I told you to leave that.” Bucky says, telling you explicitly to leave electronics here to prevent anyone finding out where you are, and also to avoid any distractions.
“Wanted to see what you’d about it, Sarge,” You wink at him, pulling out a flip phone and answering the call.
“Yeah… Uh huh… He what? Are you fucking kidding me?... Alright… Tell him not to move a fucking muscle.” You hang up, slamming the phone closed.
“Stop at the facility for a sec, I gotta take care of something.” Bucky sighs and turns away from the route to head to your facility.
“Bucky’s going to be going with you tonight, by the way, he’ll be in disguise. Just in case anything goes wrong.” Sam tells you, not really caring anymore about having to make a stop for you to take care of whatever business you need to take care of.
Your only response is a hum as Bucky can feel the anger radiating off your now tense body.
You slam the car door shut as Bucky parks behind a garbage truck outside, not even waiting for him to fully put the car in park before you exit.
Him and Sam follow quickly behind you to see what’s going on. You enter through a side door that leads to a large room, a garage for the trucks, Bucky assumes.
There’s a large truck inside, and racks of suits wrapped in plastic scattered around. A younger man stands near the truck as your crew peruses around the racks, he couldn’t be older than twenty-five years old. Your heels click on the ground as you approach, slowing down as you glance between the suits and the young man. Bucky and Sam hang around a few feet behind your trail.
You stop, fuming, staring at the man before you speak, “You wanna tell me what the fuck happened?”
“I -” He begins, but you cut him off, raising an open hand at him.
“Actually, I don’t even want to hear your fucking voice right now. Because if what I heard you did is true; if what you did to Vinny’s guy is true, you’re gonna be a fuck load of trouble.”
“Can I -”
“Shut the fuck up.”
“But -”
“I said shut the fuck up, Christopher! What part of that don’t you understand?” You yell, and even Bucky feels intimidated.
You turn to your crew, “What the fuck happened.” You demand, more than ask.
“Kid says he tried to take the truck, Vinny’s guy had a gun that fell outta the seat, went off, shot him.” One of the men summarizes, not looking up from the rack of suits.
You raise a manicured hand to pinch between your eyes, “You keep me skinny, Christopher, with all the fucking stress you cause me.”
“Would you let me explain?” He tries.
“If you don’t do as I told you and shut your fucking mouth, you’re gonna be buried with two assholes,” You threaten before continuing.
“They were fuckin’ suits! All you had to do was take the truck! How did you fuck that up -” You stop yourself and sigh, attempting to calm yourself down.
“Here’s what’s gonna happen. You’re gonna take all this shit, you’re gonna take it back to Vinny, and you’re gonna tell him what happened yourself.” You finish.
“Marone!” He exclaims, rubbing his face with his hands.
“Enough with the theatrics! You’re lucky I don’t put a bullet in your ass! Now, I don’t see you grabbing that rack and that rack and that rack and putting it back in the truck!” You wave your arms around the room.
The kid sighs and begins grabbing the racks one by one and rolling them back in the truck.
“Would it be such a shame if they all went back?” An older man from your crew asks, already wearing one of the expensive suits. You scoff and laugh.
“Bucky, pick yourself somethin’ nice for tonight,'' You turn to face him, and he jumps at the sound of your now calmer voice being directed at him, as opposed to the harsh one used on Christopher, “On me.” You wink.
...
Sam and Bucky sit on the bed and watch as you get ready. A small apartment near the party that’s already been swept for bugs. A favor, you called it, from someone you know.
They don’t question it.
“You and Bucky will go in together and I’ll be waiting at a secondary location watching and listening to everything.”
Bucky can’t tear his eyes away from your dress. A mermaid dress, he thinks it is, black and tight and hugging you in all the right places, curving around your ass and sleeveless at the top, allowing you to show off a nice necklace and your cleavage. It’s an understatement to say that he’ll enjoy accompanying you tonight, even if it’s in a costume.
His mother probably would’ve loved it if he would’ve gotten with someone like you. Someone who loves their family, a spitfire that wouldn’t take any of his shit, and whose god damn gorgeous. She might’ve had to wash your mouth out with soap, though.
“So, why is Bucky goin’ again?”
“Safety.” Bucky answers.
“Is he going for my safety or am I going for his?” You tease, finishing the last few curls of your hair, smoke coming from the iron after each time you pull your hair away from it.
“Once you find our guy, get talking with him and see if you can get him to make you an offer,” He begins.
“One I can’t refuse?”
“Then, you’ll try and get him alone, see if he’ll show you the serums, and once you do, we’ll be taking care of the rest.” Sam finishes explaining.
Bucky plucks a box from his pocket and opens it to reveal a pair of diamond earrings. One, a camera, and the other, a microphone. You’re also given a comm to hide in your ear so both him and Sam can hear everything and you can hear them.
“Easy - peasy.” You respond.
The ballroom is lively, loud music and people everywhere, and Bucky attunes all the action overwhelming him to a sweat and not that fact that you’re pressed up against him, his arm wrapped around your waist.
About a hundred different people come up to greet you, asking about your family, offering you drinks and food. Bucky can see right through all of them though; they’re all putting on the act out of fear. Everyone’s attention is on you, and Bucky’s sure if he wasn’t in disguise right now, no one would even notice.
You bring him to the middle of the crowd and he can’t be surprised when you start to dance with him, pulling at his arms to get him to loosen up. He complies, wrapping his arms around your waist and pulling you close as the two of you move together.
“I’ll let you know when I spot him.” He tells you, voice causing goosebumps to rise on your neck; goosebumps that he notices but doesn’t point out.
It only takes a song or two before he spots who he’s looking for and sends you over, making sure your com is on, and choosing to stick by the bar, giving him a good view of you and allowing himself a break of having your body pressed against his.
He’s impressed listening to you talk to this guy, voice smooth and sultry, yet still commanding.
He knows there was a lot of talk when you took position as boss; not a lot of people in the mob took you seriously and didn’t think you or a woman in general would be good in that kind of position in power. So, you use that to your advantage to get shit done, and Bucky applauds you for that.
It’s not long before the guy offers to go somewhere more private to discuss business and Bucky follows far behind, Sam praising you through the coms from where he waits in the car outside, watching through the camera in your earring.
Bucky waits outside of a closed office door upstairs, listening to the conversation through the coms but hearing your exclamation through the door when the guys give you his asking price.
“5 mil each?! What do you take me for, some kinda stunad?”
“Take it or leave it.”
“Take it or leave it, yeah, I can put a bullet between your eyes and take it, alright.”
“Stop messing around and take the offer, it’s not real anyway!” Sam tells you, not wanting to lose their chance on the serums.
You ignore him prioritizing your need for respect over the stupid mission, “How do I know these aren’t Kool-Aid pouches poured in glass bottles?”
“Well, I’m certainly not going to test ‘em out for you.” The guy scoffs.
“Stronzo. You’re outta your fucking mind offering me that.”
“I’ll lower the price for you if you give me a little dance, how ‘bout that?”
“Vaffanculo.” You curse at him.
“Up yours, lady!” He yells back, and Sam sees through the camera, he grabs at you.
“Buck, get in there.” Sam tells him, and it only takes Bucky a second to kick open the door.
He’s a bit taken aback when he not only sees the case of serums out on the table, but you holding the man bent over the small table in the middle of the room next to the serums, gun held to the back of his head.
He very quickly decides that you’re fine and moves to grab the serums, closing the case and holding it securely in his left hand.
“Don’t kill the guy.”
You stay silent and Bucky looks at you again. He can almost see the steam coming out of your ears and he notices a small cut on your cheek bone. He looks down to the man’s cowering figure and notices a large ring on his hand.
You mumble something in Italian to the man, a threat of some kind that Bucky can guess given how the man shuts his eyes and shakes a bit under your hold. Sam finally enters the room, military grade handcuffs in hand.
“Feds are on their way, get her out of here.” He tells Bucky.
You slowly lift the gun off the man’s head and stand up straighter, walking over to brush past Bucky in the direction of the back door.
He makes eye contact with Sam and gives him a nod before following after you, watching as you scrunch up the bottom of your dress to replace the gun in an ankle holster. Once outside, he stops you under a street light near the car and raises his hand to look at your cheek.
“We gotta get going,” You swat at his hand.
“You’re still bleeding.” He says, using his thumb to brush away the line of blood, smearing a red tinge on your skin.
He looks into your eyes and for a second he sees the tough exterior drop. The face of someone who got smacked across the cheek all for mouthing off at some asshole.
Your vulnerability doesn’t last long, though, as you sniff and walk towards the car, opening the passenger door and sitting inside before Bucky can make it over there to open the door for you.
The drive back to the apartment is silent, and Bucky doesn’t know what to do or say to fill the silence. Stepping into the apartment, you immediately go to change and collect your things. Bucky moves to the bathroom to look for a first aid kit of some kind.
He meets you in the room and you’re now in cotton pants and a large t-shirt, sandals on your feet showing the bright red color of your toenails and the lines indented in your skin from how tight your heels were. You’re hanging up the dress and zipping it back in the cover when Bucky drops the first aid kit on the bed.
“Christ, it’s only a small cut.” You mumble.
“Just - Let me, would you?”
He takes out the liquid of disinfectant and soaks a cotton pad, cleaning off your cheek bone with it before covering it with healing ointment and a bandaid.
You don’t thank him when he finishes and he huffs as he closes the kit, “When do you drop the act, huh?”
“I don’t.”
“Really?” Bucky asks in annoyed disbelief.
“No. People tend to try and have me whacked when I drop the act.”
He sighs, “So, what, nobody ever takes care of you? Treats you? You don’t have any days off? Time to be yourself?”
“This lifestyle doesn’t really allow me to have days off, Sergeant Barnes.” You snap, gathering the dress in your hands and turning to face him completely.
“Take me home, I’m tired and my feet hurt.”
You leave him in the room and he waits an extra few seconds before dropping the conversation and following you out.
...
Bucky opens the back door to the environmental facility with his right hand and sees the door to your office open, you and your crew sitting together surrounded by cigar smoke and he can hear a TV on.
“Sir, please step into the vehicle.”
“Like the cop would be callin’ this asshole Sir if the fuckin’ cameras weren’t around!” You wave a hand at the TV, not yet seeing Bucky standing there.
He finds it funny that the gnarliest criminals - the literal Mafia - spend their time watching shitty, scripted cop shows.
It’s been about two weeks since the mission with you where you retrieved the serums. Sam went to prom with your sister five days ago, which was hilarious for him, especially when he got photo prints of different sizes in the mail at his apartment. He didn’t bother thinking about how you found his address.
One of the men sitting next to you glances his way and sees him standing there, smirking at the vision of him; hair combed slightly back and to the side, and a large bouquet of flowers in his right hand and a small paper box in his left.
“You got company, Boss.” He says.
You look over to the doorway and your jaw drops in an open-mouthed smile.
“Look at googootz! Now this is a man that knows how to treat a lady, are you boys paying attention?” You tease, scurrying over to him and pinching one of his cheeks, resting your free hand on his large bicep to guide him into the room, the rest of your crew ushering out to give the two of you privacy.
“What’s in the box?”
“Cannoli.”
You throw your head back with an exaggerated moan, “You know the way to an Italian woman’s heart, Sergeant Barnes. What’s with all the gifts?”
“Thought I’d treat you.” Is all his response is.
You narrow your eyes at him and stand up a little straighter, crossing your arms over your chest.
The last conversation before he dropped you off that night hasn’t escaped his mind. He understands the difficulties of life - how it’s hard to find time for yourself among the busy schedule that is existing. He catches himself sometimes, too, forcing his body to run with no sleep, burning through all of his energy until he’s completely drained and blaming it on life.
But life’s not always like that. Life allows for days off. For treats. For a bit of kindness. And Bucky’s come to show you just that.
“What, a beautiful woman like you never received flowers and pastries before?” He says, taking a half-step forward to be close enough to look you closer in the eyes.
“Are you flirting with me?” You whisper in amusement.
His eyes glance away from yours to look down at your red-painted lips. He gives you a shy smirk, really turning up the charm. For a big, bad, boss, you’re pretty easy to break down.
“Let me take you out tonight.”
“Maybe I’ve got plans.”
“Cancel ‘em.”
“What makes you think you’re worth canceling plans for?”
“Why don’t you trust me and find out?”
“You should know by now, Sergeant Barnes, that I don’t trust.”
He doesn’t respond for a moment, setting the box of cannoli on your desk before reaching his now free hand up to your face, using his finger to brush away a stray hair and push it behind your ear.
He then takes a hold of one of your hands, turning it over to place a kiss on the top of it, before wrapping your fingers around the flowers in his other hand, forcing you to take them.
“No restaurant you’ve been to a hundred times over, no drama, no business. Just a man trying to treat a lady.” You look down at the flowers before meeting his eyes again.
“I get to pick the place.”
“No.”
“The kind of food.”
“No.”
“The -”
“No. Let me take care of everything.” Bucky insists, determined to get you to give up control for the first time in what he can only imagine has been a very long time.
Bucky knows better than anyone how terrifying it is to give up control. It was terrifying when he was forced to give up control, his free will taken away from him in the war for decades upon decades, but it’s terrifying even now when he has to do it as a free man. It makes a person vulnerable. When was the last time you were allowed to be vulnerable for somebody?
“I’m gonna pick you up here at six. Wear something nice and leave the executive attitude at home.” He finishes, leaving you with the flowers and cannoli before returning back outside, ignoring the stares he receives from you crew who wait patiently outside your office.
He feels your eyes follow him at the door, and he can’t wait to sweep you off your feet tonight.
205 notes · View notes
folkreid · 4 years ago
Text
cheater cheater
TYPE: angst
WORD COUNT: 1.8K
SONG: should've said no- taylor swift
I walk into the living room Lila sitting down and Spencer was standing next to the couch she was on. Spencer and I have been dating for eight months, it's been going good. It's kind of hard to focus sometimes. All I can think about is him.
My phone starts ringing. It's Elle. I walk into the hallway to take the call. "We're on our way over there" she says through the phone. "Okay well Spencer and I are here with Lila" I tell her. "Okay good we'll be there in a bit" Elle says before hanging up.
I walk back to the living room. Spencer and Lila aren't there, where are they?
I hear a splash from outside. What the fuck?
I run out and see Spencer and Lila in the pool. They were kissing. Spencer was kissing her. What the hell. How could he do this to me. He grabbed her face with his two hands, just how he was kissing me earlier today. My heart sinks. Why? Why would he do this? I feel tears fill my eyes I quickly wipe them away. I'm at work I shouldn't be crying.
They finally pull away. His eyes meet with mine. "Y/n I'm I-I" he stutters.
I leave the room. I see Elle outside talking to Spencer a couple minutes.
-
Well we saved the girl and found the stalker. I've been avoiding Spencer. I don't want to talk to him. Or see him. Or be around him. Theres the problem. I live with him, we decided to move in together about a month ago. I moved out of my apartment. Which was stupid considering we had only been together for seven months at the time. We were so positive we would be a perfect couple.
How could I be so fucking naive.
Of course we wouldn't work out. I loved him more than he loved me.
Elle walks up to me, I was waiting for the elevator. "What's wrong Y/n" she notices me mood. "Nothing, can I stay with you for the night?" I ask.
She shakes her head yes. "Why, did something happen to you and Spencer?" she asks concerned. "No, I just think I need some space" I tell her. She nods as we enter the elevator.
We walk out the building heading to her car.
We finally arrive at her house, she opens the door and lets me in.
I flop onto her couch. "Did you tell Spencer you're here?" Elle asked me putting down her bag. "No" I mumble going into her cabinet grabbing a blanket and pillow. She kept extra ones there.
I lie them down on the couch. "He's been texting me like crazy, he says that he's worried." Elle tells me showing me the text. I take the phone from her hand and type. "Sorry I haven't heard from her" I send the text. I give her phone back to her and she looks at the text. She looks at me in disbelief.
"Y/n! Spencer just wants to know you're safe" she scolds me. "Please don't tell him i'm here I really don't want to see him." I beg.
She sighed. "Fine" she gives up.
I start to feel bad. I should text him. "I'm safe Spencer, I don't want to see you right now." I sent the message and lie back down in Elles couch.
About an hour passes and he sends me a couple of messages. I hear the door bell ring. Elle looks up from whatever she was doing in the kitchen over to the door. She goes over to it. I immediately hear Spencer's voice. "S-She won't answer me. She told me she was safe but-but i'm worried Elle" he cried.
He came in and saw me. He looked over to Elle angrily. "You said she wasn't here! Why would you lie to me!" he gets in her face.
"Reid stop. Elle didn't lie to you I took her phone any texted you from there" I explain. He mumbled an apology to Elle.
"Can we talk" Spencer asks me. Elle leaves the living room walking over to her room.
"What Reid" I say annoyed. I sit down on the couch putting my hands to my face. "I'm sorry" he whispers.
"I don't care just leave" I feel tears building up in my eyes. "Y/n/n" he starts.
"Reid, I don't care okay. Just leave" I stand up from the couch. He comes closer. "Don't call me Reid. Stop it. You haven't called me Reid since we've started dating." his eyes get watery as he says that.
"Well we aren't dating anymore" I back up from him. "Y/n, don't break up with me. Please. It was a stupid kiss" he begs.
"A stupid kiss Spencer?! Really? Why didn't you pull away!" I yell at him, tears streaming down my face.
"I-I don't know" he chokes over his tears. "Please I cant live without you" he cries.
"I don't care! You don't think it hurt me to see you with another girl!" I sob.
I back away from him and he comes closer. "Don't get near me" I sternly say.
I push him away and walk past him. He grabs my right arm. Almost by instinct I turn around and slap him. He holds his face and let go of me. I just stand and stare at him not knowing what to say.
"What the fuck Y/n!" he screams.
"I-Im sorry" I stutter nervous. I didn't mean to slap him I was just mad.
"Are you mad at me?" I ask. I feel so stupid. Asking him if he's mad at me after he cheats on me. What's wrong with me.
"Of course not" he sighed.
What now? What do I do now.
I broke down. I broke down. I slid down on the floor. Spencer immediately followed me down holding me in his arms.
I don't know what to do. I just feel hurt. So hurt.
I finally give in and sob into his chest. He holds me close and strokes my back. "Shh babe. I'm sorry love. I love you so freaking much." he says tears pouring from his face.
I don't even know what to think.
Do I stay with him? I love him but I just don't know.
I end up staying in his arms trying to make my decision.
I want to stay with him. I shouldn't let myself though.
"Spencer we need space"
——
It's been a couple weeks since Spencer kissed Lila. Spencer and I have talked. I try to sort out my feelings. And I finally did. I still want to be with Spencer.
We talked it all out today. And now i'm in the passengers seat of his car. We're going home, I didn't end up packing my stuff and getting a new apartment. I stayed at Elles house. She would go get me clothes from Spencer's sometimes.
I love Spencer. Like a lot. He tells me he loves me as much as I love him. I don't know though. I'm still kind of confused.
My thoughts were interrupted when Spencer put his hand on my thigh. I slightly flinched before taking his hand and putting it on his thigh. He gives me a confused look. "Sorry, I just don't want to be touched right now" I tell him. "That's fine love" he whispers before focusing on the road.
We arrive to his apartment. Oh I meant our.
I open the car door walking into the building. Spencer slightly jogs to catch up to me. We get into the elevator together.
Spencer puts his hand around my waist and brings me closer. He kisses my temple. "I love you so much" he whispers. "I love you too" I mumble.
It feels wrong. If he loves me why did he kiss her.
No Y/n. I said I wouldn't think like this.
I walk into our apartment and immediately go to our room.
I lie on the bed. "Are you going to sleep?" Spencer asks. "Mhm" I mumble.
He comes into the bed and wraps his arms around me. He spoons me. Why is touching me. Can he not. I scoot away. "What's wrong Y/n" he asked me. "Sorry" I whisper. I scoot closer to him. I can do this. It was months ago.
I lie on his chest and he kisses my head. I bite my tongue. Y/n don't say anything. He puts a hand under my chin lifting it. He gives me a light kiss.
That ticks me off. I get away from him and stand in the corner of the room. "Stop!" I yell.
"What's wrong baby?" he gets off the bed.
"Dont touch me please. Just don't kiss me or touch me or anything." I tell him. "I'm going to sleep in the living room" I say grabbing a pillow. "Why? Why are you going to the living room" he grabs my arm.
"I'm sorry I just don't want to be touched or kissed or anything" I tug my arm away from him.
"Why? Why can't I touch my own girlfriend" he looks at me angry. I can see hints of sadness behind the angry.
"Because" I say walking away from him. "So now I cant even kiss my girlfriend now?" he screams.
Something about that made me angry. So fucking angry. "Well maybe you should go kiss Lila!" I scream at Spencer.
I tried to let it go. I cant.
He looked at me in disbelief.
"Are you kidding me Y/n? You said you were over if!" he yells at me getting closer. I was basically cornered. He was right in front of me.
"How do you expect me to get over it Spencer" I say with tears running down my face. "I don't want you to hurt" he says. "What can I do to make this all better" Spencer asks.
"Nothing" I say honestly. There's nothing he can do to make it better.
"Please Y/n" he begs. I look into his eyes. His puppy dog eyes that I love so much.
"I think we should break up" I sigh.
I watch his reaction. It's as if you can see the exact moment his heart broke.
"No, No" he shakes his head.
"Yes Spencer." I grab my phone and keys to my car. He starts sobbing and I can't help but to feel bad.
"Leave, if you're going to leave do it now" he says in a low voice. I walkout his room not closing the door. I stand in the doorway he doesn't seem to notice. He goes into my drawer and grabs my favorite sweater.
He lies back down and cries into it. Y/n leave now. If you don't you'll get sucked back into this.
Spencer and I are over. All because of a kiss.
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abandoned-ax · 4 years ago
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I’m on the team - pt 3
Pt 1 pt 2 pt 4
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Summery: the first day of training camp!!
Tw!!! scratching (self harm scratching), panic attack
It’s strange, over the week the team has been super busy, practicing and studying. I helped Tsuki with Hinata and Kageyama trying to make sure they pass there exams, Iv gotten pretty close with the two, there both really fun, and watching them both struggle with classes and Tsuki scolding them is super funny. Sadly the two didn’t pass their exams and are both super upset. I remember when we were getting our test scores back i rushed to their classroom with Yams hoping to see them both super excited only to see Hinata come out pouting, and Kageyama with this super dejected look like he was super disappointed in himself for his grades. They were assured tho that they would be able to get to the training camp just a bit late!
We’re headed to the training camp, me Tsuki and yams are all sitting together, me and Tsuki on one side and yams on the seat across the isle. I’m starting to get nervous, not knowing how other teams are going to react to me being there! They don’t even know who I am, or my situation!
“Tsuki!! What if their angry! Maybe I shouldn’t have come- or-or maybe I shouldn’t have even joined, we don’t know how people are going to react!”
“It’s going to be ok (Y/N) im sure their all nice.” Yams said with this super supportive smile
“Yeah and if anyone bothers you I’ll take care of them.” Tsuki says knocking shoulders with me giving me a small smile.
“Yeah (Y/N) don’t worry! You’ve got all of us, we won’t let anything happen!” Suga says turning around, seemingly having heard me freaking out.
I sigh starting to scratch my hands a nervous habit of mine. After a minute or two Tsuki notices grabbing my hand giving me a disapproving look. He reaches down into the backpack he brought on the bus looking for something, pulling out a stress ball and hands it to me.
The rest of the bus ride me Tsuki and Yams ended up falling asleep, I guess I tired myself out with all of my stressing.
We got to Tokyo faster then I thought, the bus ride felt way to quick! But I guess that happens when you sleep, it’s like time travel.
Getting off the bus we were greeted by some guy with crazy strange rooster hair, I quickly moved to hide behind Tsuki still scared about meeting the other guys. Daichi went over to talk to rooster head while the rest of us got our bags off the bus Tanaka and Noya pushing me and Tsuki and Yams to “walk faster” and “get more excited”.
I overhear The guy Daichi is talking to saying “ your missing a few aren’t you? Wait who’s the new kid” I move closer to Tsuki hoping his tallness will hide me, “why does the new kid look so scared of me.” all I can think about is what if they’re transphobic, what if they don’t want me here, what’s going to happen when they find out. “I’ll tell you about him in a bit.” Daichi responds giving me a concerned look. Tsuki makes a comment about annoying volleyball guys while nudging me to try and get my attention, he and Yams start bickering a little bit and Noya and Tanaka are practically bouncing off the walls and it keeps me distracted.
We were pointed towards the room we’d be staying in putting our bags down and changing. I started getting more nervous, Iv never met these people before and they don’t know my situation. What if I walk on the court and someone yells at me, what if people start asking questions, what if one of them gets super angry and starts yelling at me, what if the team decides they actually side with them! What if-
“(Y/N)” it’s Tsuki and Suga, the two are standing in front of me, Suga is holding my hands and Tsuki has a hand on my back.
“Come on let’s sit down yeah,” the two move me to go sit on a windowsill I look over their shoulders and see all the guys looking at me, I don’t know why I feel so small now, I know them all, I know their not judging me, but I still feel like the piercing stare I’m getting from them is too much. I see Asahi start moving and coming to stand next to Suga on the opposite side from Tsuki.
“Hey (Y/N) I need you to breath for me ok,” he gives me a really concerned look I hadn’t even realized I was hyperventilating, taking one of my hands from Suga and putting it on his chest taking big deep breaths so that I can feel it. “In and out, in and out.” The two words being repeated like a mantra.
Once I’m breathing slightly better Tsuki starts asking questions
“are you lightheaded?”
“Kinda”
“did you eat this morning”
“no”
“why?”
“Didn’t have time.”
“Can someone go grab a granola bar or something?” I see some movement and I think it was Noya who left to go grab something for me to eat. “Are you nervous about training camp?”
“Yes” I say quietly hoping that only he can hear
“Is it because you haven’t played a real game yet.”
I shake my head, I haven’t even thought about that fact that I’m going to be playing a real game for the first time, the only people Iv played against is the team.
“Is it because your afraid people are going to be mean about your gender?”
“I- yes,”
I see everyone look around, I guess they hadn’t thought this was really that big of a deal, but for me, this isn’t something that happens normally, while they all had the door to this space opened to them, I had to hike up a mountain to just get to the door, and I’m just scared that once I get into the space that they all see as a right, is a privilege that most people like me don’t have, it isn’t a space I’m normally supposed to be in, and once you realize my situation everyone knows it.
Suga pulls on my hands making me face him. “ it’s gunna be ok (Y/N), if anyone says anything we’ll deal with it. You’ve got the team! We’re going to make sure your ok.” Suga says with a reassuring smile.
Noya quickly gets back in the room with a granola bar and a water bottle sliding in front of me to hand them both to me. “Thanks Noya” it’s a couple more minutes that I sit there catching my breath before I give everyone a nod letting them know I’m ok, everyone starts to disperse to Finnish getting ready.
Tsuki went over to his bag giving me an extra shirt he had, just like when I first stopped wearing my binder while playing. It’s a reassuring gesture. I get changed and everyone starts leaving before Tsuki grabs my hand, holding me back for a second.
“Your gunna be ok. I promise. And if you get scared or anything just let me or Suga or Daichi know and we’ll get you off the court ok?”
“Thanks Tsuki.”
Tsuki speeds up a little bit to get to yams and Daichi slows down a bit to get back to me.
“Hey I wanted to let you know before we get in there, there might be a cupule people who know your situation, mainly Kuroo the captain of Nekoma, he’s the guy from when we first show up. And I think Kenma their setter might. Him and Kuroo are close and he’s friends with hinata, and we’ll you know hinata. Other then that I’m not sure, they might have told some others but still I can’t tell you what the rest know.”
“Thanks Daichi, um did Kuroo seem chill about it when you told him?”
“Yeah, yeah definitely, I mean he was for sure surprised but, he ended up just saying ‘oh! That’s cool’ so I don’t think you have anything to worry about there.”
“Thanks Daichi.”
“Of course kid.”
We finally all get into the gym moving to get warmed up before our first game!
—————————————————————
Let’s just say we haven’t been winning much, Coach put me into Hinatas spot so Iv been playing a lot. Honestly Iv been so stressed about my gender that I didn’t have time to stress about the fact that Iv never been in a game before. Iv gotten a few good spikes in and have been blocking a bit, but I’m by no means super good! We’ve been doing lots of flying laps.
After one of our practice games with nekoma everyone was taking a break to drink some water when some guy with bleached long hair came over to me.
“Hey.” He said kind of quietly, he seemed pretty awkward like he doesn’t do this often.
“Hey?”
“Um I just wanna let you know- i mean I’m friends with hinata and he’s told me about your situation.”
“Ah I see”
“I just wanted to let you know I’m chill with it, all of us on Nekoma are, so you’ve got nothing to worry about with us.”
“Thanks. It’s uh really reassuring to hear that. I’m (Y/N)”
“Kenma.”
“It’s nice to meet you Kenma”
“So uh how long have you been playing, it’s just we did a practice game with you guys not to long again and you weren’t there.”
“Oh yeah umm I just started playing only a few weeks ago.”
“Wow really. Your pretty good for someone who’s never played before.”
“Ha thanks, but I really have my team to thank, they got me playing and have been pretty good teachers”
“I hope one of those teachers hasn’t been Hinata I’m pretty sure most of what he says to explain volleyball is sound-effects.”
“I know right! It’s like he doesn’t know words sometimes.”
“Yeah it’s really strange but you get used to it.”
“Haha I guess eventually I’ll learn to speak his strange language!”
“Yeah!” Kind of out of nowhere the guy from this morning Kuroo I think his name was wrapped an arm around Kenmas shoulders.
“Well well what do we have here! Is Kenma actually talking to someone!”
“Shut up Kuroo”
“Hi I’m Kuroo, (Y/N) right?”
“Yeah, yeah that’s me.”
“Well it’s nice to meet the newest player.” He sends me a wink, “come on Kenma our games about to start, it was nice to meet you (Y/N)!” The two walk off headed back to the court.
It’s a little bit later in the day that Hinata and Kageyama show up! Hinata taking my spot in the game, and honestly I’m grateful, this day has been exhausting.
An: hey guys! Thank you so much for reading! I hope you all liked this part!! I’m so excited to keel writing!! I take requests so if you have any please just message me!!!
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gb-patch · 4 years ago
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Ask Answers: May 15th Part 1
It’s been longer than usual since our last answer session, so I’m answering a ton of questions today! It’s so big I split it into two parts. Thank you for the patience on getting a response to these.
Thanks for reaching out to us with your questions and kind words ^^!
Sorry if this has been asked before or isn't something you can say but is there anyway for Cove to confess in step 4? I wanted him to confess in step 3 and followed all the steps to make him do it but ended up texting my family instead of Cove at the end.
Yeah, Cove can confess in Step 4!
Hello! I heard that Cove is on the spectrum, albeit undiagnosed. As someone who is ND, this makes me UNBELIEVABLY happy. I literally was brought to tears! Thank you for that!
Out of curiosity, will Cove be diagnosed in Step 4? I have a strong feeling y’all won’t make it a HUGE deal/make it out to be negative, so I’m not worried about that whatsoever! I’m just curious just he’ll off handedly mention it? Or will it just not be touched upon at all (which is ok!)?
Either way is ok, I’m just curious!
I’m happy it made you happy! Admittedly, Cove simply being someone with autism that grew up not being diagnosed was something I included for myself. I didn’t really think anyone would notice or ask about it, aha. But players did start to have questions about his traits, so I started to talk about it outside of the game. It’s great to see it get such a positive response and now I do feel like having it be a non-topic may have been the wrong choice and bringing it up would’ve been good in terms of having positive representation for that. I don’t know if I’ll find a way to mention it in Step 4 now, with how far along the game is, but I am at least thinking about it when originally it wasn’t something I really even considered.
Hey!  Just wanted to say thank you for Our Life.  It's been a bright spot and a needed escape in what's otherwise been a crummy year.  I know you just did a Q&A post but I figured I'd ask anyway.  Was just curious about Step 4.  Will it be similar to the other Steps in that it consists of several different moments or will it just be one long sequence?
Step 4 is shorter than the prior Steps because it’s just an epilogue rather than a full arc of a story. It’ll consist of scenes that all happen in a set row one after the other. There won’t be a collection of Moments to choose from. But it’ll still be very sweet and fun.
¡hola!, you see, first I want to say that I love Our Life! (°◡°♡) and I have 2 important questions, would Cove cry watching titanic? and what is the saddest part according to him? (sorry for my english) 
Titanic would make him cry. He’d probably think the parts showing people who aren’t able to make it to the life boats/are choosing to stay and go down with the ship were the saddest.
Hello, I wanted to ask how much you earn with creating games? Like is it possible to make a living? Thank you >< <3 
How much I earn varies a lot month to month based on Steam sales, Patreon backers, and how many projects are in full production at the time. It’s also hard to say how much I make historically, since that also changes dramatically year by year. But I do earn enough to work on these games full time! I really appreciate all the support that allows me to do that.
Hey!! I was wondering for the 18+ Our Life moment, will there be an emphasis on safety/comfort for all involved? I feel like there  would be just going off of what the rest of the game is like, but I wanted to ask 
Yes! Cove is a nervous boy himself and also super cautious about doing anything the MC doesn’t like, so clear consent from both is absolutely needed for anything to happen. It’s a conversational sexy times Moment with stops/starts so the two can talk about how they’re feeling, rather than a heat of the moment just going for it kind of thing.
Hey!! I was wondering how long the wedding dlc would be? Will it be broken up into moments, or just one big event? 
It’s one long series of scenes all in a row rather than a collection of Moments to pick from. It’s the shortest and the least expensive of all the DLCs. It’s not super crucial to get and those who aren’t into big weddings can totally skip it without worry.
HELLO AMAZING DEVS 👋 i am hopelessly in love with the worst guy ever (jeremy king) and because of this i have a really stupid question: does he really hate people who are nice to him? TvT he’s too cute to be mean to istg it’s a miracle JB held the urge to be consistently nice to him bc just look at his FACE he is so cute! thank you for jeremy’s route it’s so lovely (and awful bc he’s scum 11/10) it gave me so much laughs LMAO i hope you guys have a good day!! 
Haha, thank you. He doesn’t hate them but he’s certainly not pleased with them. Jeremy is either uncomfortable with or annoyed by people being sweet on him, depending on how they approach it. He’s far more comfortable with jerkiness. It lets him relax and he can be himself without it being a problem, since he’s also a jerk. He feels a level of guilt being such a little punk to kind people, not enough to be a better person but still.
Has Cove dated or been interested in someone other than MC? 
Nope! He stays single over the course of the game if he’s not with the MC.
Is Step 4 more mature? Or it's gonna be set in similar atmosphere as Step 3? 
Step 4 is a similar atmosphere as Step 3. Though, it’s actually kind of less mature-topic heavy than Step 3 since it’s just a ‘hey, let’s check in on the gang to see what they’re up to’ style epilogue rather than a story arc with serious issues.
will there be new music for now and forever?? or will the old our life music be reused? 
It’s gonna be a brand new soundtrack. We’ll be opening up a job position for that soon.
Hi, is it okay if we use the assets in Our Life (like the sprites) for fanworks or fan content content, like edits? 
Sure! Just as long as you don’t use the assets made by those artists to make money.
Quick clarification on Step 3 choices: I hope I didn't come off rude (because I LOVE the game, really!!), I was just curious because the intro threw me off at times. For example, you could choose how you felt about Elizabeth in Step 2 (Dinner), but during the Step 3 intro, it says that you got closer to Liz and I didn't get a choice in it. 
For the example, it can’t be helped that you’re closer to Liz in Step 3 than you were in Step 2 because she’s inherently closer to the MC regardless of whether you liked her or not in Step 2. Her feelings are out of your control and the game isn’t so dramatic that you can push her affection away and not let her bond with you, haha. But ‘being closer’ can still be relative. For some people maybe that means you’re best buds now and for others it might just mean you’re not fighting all the time any more. If there’s other parts you want to mention, feel free to let us know.
Did the illustrator for Our Life change? 
We have many OL artists! The main artists who set the game’s style haven’t changed, but there’s multiple other artists who help finish assets.
So Miranda's type is confident and outgoing, huh? So...does that mean Terri's her type?? 👀 
Haha, sorry for the late reply on this. As you might’ve seen in our post yesterday- yeah that is her type.
Hey! First, I just want to say I've really enjoyed how detailed OL got with gender identity and sexuality and how respectful the topics were handled! It's been so wonderful to play since the experiences could be close to my own (I'd be lying if I said I didn't tear up at parts). Second, I was wondering, would future games explore the topic of polyamory? I'd love to see more visual novels allow room for that and I saw you've explored the topic before.
Keep up the amazing work! ♡
Thank you! We do want to include polyamory in at least some of our future projects. Floret Bond, which might be what you’re referring to when mentioning how we’ve explored the topic before, is on hold unfortunately. So right now I’m not sure when something might release or what will be the first game of ours to come out with poly relationships (we might do something else before FB is done). We’ll have see how things ends up coming together.
Hey um. I feel like im not allowed to ask this on the private discord cuz people will yell at me but why is there so much focus on OL2 and not finishing OL1 stuff? I like the new people but i kind of want to finish cove's story and get derek and baxter stuff first. didn't people pay for it? 
I’m sorry, I don’t understand entirely what’s making that situation a concern. There’s a channel in the discord for critique where no one is allowed to comment back. People can voice things they’re worried about without any way for others to push back on it. And the two teams working on the OL games are different. We try to post pretty often about how we’re hiring brand new people to start on Our Life: Now & Forever. The OL1 team is all still working on OL1 like normal. There’s only more updates on the Patreon for OL2 because the expansions to the first game are mostly script-based at this point while OL2 is just starting to get all its art, which means there’s a lot more to show off as previews.
Also, there was a Kickstarter for the first Our Life, if that’s what you mean by people paying for it. But one of the stretch goals was to start Our Life 2 early, before fully completing Our Life 1, so that the new game could be out sooner. It wouldn’t make sense to stop doing OL2 work because that would be going against what backers were promised. Maybe you didn’t get the full story before and hopefully this clears it up!
Hello! I know it's up to every player but.. What is your recommendation for playing order? Did you ever had any timeline  events planned? 
I didn’t make the events with a planned timeline. The events got made simply as I had ideas for them and then I just kind of organized them from left to right on the screen in an order to space out more dramatic ones between more lighthearted ones. Any order the player wants to go with is totally valid!
Hi! It's Step 4 a paid dlc or update? And how long it's planned to be? Ps. Love the game! 
The Step 4 epilogue is free! The Cove Wedding DLC does cost money, though. Those are planned to be shorter than the usual Steps/DLCs.
Will we have options for what sort of job the MC might have by the time step 4 takes place? 
Yeah, you can. It’s not super exact or detailed, but there are options about it.
Is there a pandemic in Our Life world, or is it just in a better timeline with no pestilence? 
Our Life is pandemic-free! That didn’t exist when we began working on the project and it’s not something we’d like to feature in this story now that it has unfortunately come along, aha.
Hi, you said that you can play tic-tac-toe or hangman with Cove in Boating if you're sick/scared but I keep getting tic-tac-toe. Am I doing something wrong?
After being sick/scared you have to continue to be upset/unwell. If you calm down and decide to just chill you’ll end up playing tic-tac-toe.
Hi, GB Patch! Since Lee was initially commissioned to only appear in two Steps does this mean she won't appear in the Wedding DLC? I really like her character so it'll be a little weird to not have our cousin at our wedding, aha.
She is gonna be in Step 4/the wedding DLC after all! We’re still working with her creator to make sure it fits with what they wanted.
Is Sunset Bird based on a real place? Asking for a friend, not trying to move there or anything. 👀
It’s based on small beach towns in So-Cal, but not one specific town you could go see in real life, I’m afraid. It’d be nice if it was real, though.
—– —– —– —–
We released a new FAQ! It answers common questions and we’ll keep adding more to it. Please check there before sending an ask. FAQ   Also, if you prefer to just see the main posts without all the asks/reblogs, feel free to follow our side account instead: GB Patch Updates Blog
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bunnirs · 4 years ago
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Yandere! Gon and Killua with a S/O who tries to leave
Requested by: Anon!
“I don’t know if you do any yandere stuff but if you do I was wondering how would yandere killua and gon react to thier s/o trying to leave them for Accidentally Cheating. Thx love your blog”
First Gon and Killua request!! I’m so excited! For the sake of all things holy, ALL CHARACTERS WILL BE AGED UP A BIT. especially with the cheating thing 👉👈 UMM ALSO THIS IS MY FIRST EVER YANDERE TYPE THING SO IM SORRY 😭
Gon:
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Alright this dude doesn’t see anything wrong with the fact that he cheated
HE THINKS ITS NORMAL??
And to think you’d get so upset over him ‘cheating’ on you??
He would never! He was just being ‘nice’ to one of tourists of Whale Island
A little to nice.
He’s the type of Yandere that thinks what he does is completely fine! He thinks he’s doing the right thing!
So that’s where you had enough.
Gon was a lunatic and you had to get away
Maybe you’d call Leorio or Kurapika, they’d help you
That’s all you had to do
Get to a pay phone and dial Leorio or Kurapika
So while Gon had left to do God knows what..
You packed your shit and walked out the door
Surprisingly.. you got to the pay phone rather easily
Your paranoia had shot up with the risk of getting caught
Like 📈📈📈📈📈
You made the decision to call Kurapika. He was more serious with this stuff.
You waited for Kurapika until it was dark out
But he came all the same
But you hadn’t expected to see Gon right behind him
That’s right. Gon had said something about visiting Kurapika. Shit.
You were an idiot not to pay closer attention
Fuck fuck fuck he looks mad
His eyes were avoid of anything,,,
His soulless hues stared into your own, and you felt like you could throw up
Kurapika seemed rather worried, asking what happened while Gon was gone
You couldn’t tell him about Gon being a psycho
He wouldn’t believe you.. right?
You made the choice in saying that someone had tried to hurt you, and with Gon away, you didn’t know what to do
Kurapika sighed and said he’d get a hotel and would scout the island for any suspicious behavior,,,
But he didn’t know that Gon WAS the culprit.
Soon after that, you went home with Gon.
“....You lied to him, Y/N.” There was a pregnant pause before your name, almost like it was hard for him to pronounce. “You never lie.”
“...Gon....” You said quietly, not prepared for whatever the hell he was going to say.
“Is this about the woman?” Gon narrowed his eyes at his feet, which moved as the both of you took the road to his house.
“No I just-“ you went quiet, not knowing what to say. Make something up. Fast. “I just wanted to.. get away from the island a bit.”
“Get away?” Gon’s dark expression changed into one of confusion. “Do you not like it here?”
“No! I like it here!” You said abruptly, your eyes widening. “It’s just, I was thinking of visiting my parents! See what they’re up too!” You nervously laughed, praying he didn’t notice your smile faulter.
“...Oh well...that’s easy.” Gon smiled at you, and for a second, you thought you did something good. “They’re up to nothing.” His eyes darkened, his smile widening a bit.
“Nothing?” You questioned, confused.
“They’re dead.” Gon hummed. “They kept trying to get in my way.. so I put them out of their misery. They missed you a lot.. and kept saying I kidnapped you! Which isn’t true right?”
You didn’t say anything. Nothing at all. The only thing that escaped your mouth were the harsh sobs, which seemed to shake your whole body. You fell to the ground, the rough asphalt slicing your knees, the stinging couldn’t compare to the state your heart was in.
“...Oh..” His voice lowered, the slight evidence of worry laced his tone. “.....Can you not speak..?” He grabbed your hand, kneeling before you.
You smacked his hand away, falling onto your back. “G-get the hell away from me!” You screamed, your hands slipping on the bloodied gravel below you. You kept trying to stand up, but it seemed that gravity pushed against you even harder than before. “Go away! For gods sake just leave me alone!”
He stared at his hand for about a minute, his mouth wide and agape. “Leave.. you alone? While your upset?” He seemed hurt, his eyes swelling up, tears appearing. “What kind of boyfriend would I be if I left you like this! You’re hurting!”
“Because of you! I’m HURTING BECAUSE OF YOU!” You screamed in his face, somehow gaining the strength to sit up.
“.......I didn’t hurt you! I would never hurt you!” His voice gained in volume, almost like he was panicking. “I just did what was best for both of us!”
“You did what was best for you!” You shoved your finger into his chest, your nail almost bending due to the pressure. “You never think about me! You force me to stay with you! I never wanted something like this! I-“
“Shut up.” Gon said suddenly, shadow overcasting his facial features. “Everything I do is for you... don’t you dare say it isn’t!” His hand quickly grabbed your wrist, the sickening sound of bone being crushed seemed to echo in your ears.
“Y-you’re hurting me... right now... you’re hurting me..” you whispered, trying your best not to cry even more. Your head already hurt from the screaming, the pain adding to your desire to pass out.
“You don’t know real pain.” He said coldly. “But you’ll find out soon.”
That’s all you heard before you eyes seemed to close, your body falling forward into someone’s warm embrace, the air being knocked out of you.
“But everything I do... is for you.. Y/N.”
Killua:
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Thing is I don’t see him cheating :(
He’s so closed off as is, so it’s surprising he’s in love with you anyway!!
He’s definetly the Yandere who thinks that you need him
Like you’d be in danger without him
He’s definitely convinced himself that you’d die if you weren’t with him
And that makes him so friggin sad
He wants you to be happy
But he wants you to be safe first.
So, if you try to escape, that’ll make him even more broken inside
He’s a tragic yandere tbh
Wants to give you happiness and love, but he can’t let you out of his sight 😭
So you probably try to leave when he kills someone that was close to you
Probably a guy friend of yours
He felt like he was dangerous, and couldn’t have him taking you away
So he murdered him on the spot with a quick hand through the heart, his nails bloodied.
That was the last straw. You were living with a murderer.
How you would get out? You had no idea
You were in the Zoldyck Mansion. Locked away.
If anything, you could try talking to Canary. She liked you. A lot.
So that’s what you did. You told Canary everything.
She believed you almost immediately. She knew the Zoldycks were cruel... Killua included, no matter how much she liked him.
She’d try to smuggle you outside the gate
Hopefully the security guard would understand
That’s what got you here, standing from right inside the testing gate, Killua before you.
Canary was long gone. She had to stop the butlers from following you.. so you were alone.
“....What are you doing so far from home...?” He questioned, his eyes widened at the sight of you with bags in your hands. “It’s dangerous out here.”
“Killua, we’re inside the gate. You know it’s plenty safe out here.” You narrowed your eyes, nails digging into the leather holsters of your bag. You couldn’t back down now. “Besides, I can protect myself if need be.”
“.....Of course you can. I don’t doubt your abilities.” Killua rolled his eyes, his attitude returning to normal. “I wouldn’t date someone who can’t protect themselves.”
“....Then why don’t you act like that?” You felt a pang in your chest. He made it seems like you were weak.... He made it seem like you were helpless. Why would he do that?
“Act like what? Protective? I can’t do that?” He questioned, his defensive tone making itself clear.
“That is not what this is.” You countered, stepping back a bit. “You know this isn’t you being protective! You act like I’m fragile! Some glass vase that’ll break if someone pushes me to hard! I’m not! I’m a professional hunter just like you!”
“...You don’t act like it.” He pouted, shoving his hands in his pockets.
“How can you be so childish right now!? This is why I need to leave!” You stepped forward, your voice gaining in volume.
“...Leaving is a need? Are you sure you just don’t want it?” He stepped towards you, his voice getting low. He was definitely getting pissed off now.
“I haven’t been outside the gate in years Killua! You know how ridiculous that sounds?! Last time I interacted with someone from outside this gate, you fucking murdered them! He was my friend!”
“He was trying to hurt you!” Killua responded, his eyes darkening. “He was inviting you outside the gate! And by yourself no less! He could’ve hurt you!”
“Going out the gate isn’t a death sentence! I need fresh air Killua! I need to see people!” You continued to yell, throwing your hands up in the air dramatically, the bag in your hand almost being flung off to the side.
“You see my family everyday! They’re people!” Killua scoffed. “barely...” he muttered to himself, getting lost in thought.
“What if I don’t want to see your family anymore?! What if I don’t want to see you?!” You gasped right after the words left your mouth, hands covered your lips, almost in disbelief of what you had just said.
As your thoughts consumed you, you felt a slight pain in your abdomen, your body falling to the ground. Your bags cluttered around you, creating what ironically looked like a crime scene. He had just pushed you. That’s never happened before.
Killua stood above you, his eyes pulsating with dark intent, his aura covering for what seemed like miles. “....Don’t you ever say that!” He yelled out, tears almost appearing in his empty voids. “I might believe it one day! That you don’t need me anymore!” He grabbed the collar of your shirt, so his eyes could look into yours. “I can’t lose you like everyone else! Don’t leave me behind! I used to think you needed me but now I think it’s the other way around!” He cried out, tears threatening to spill. “I have to protect you with everything I have! I’ll continue to kill the people who try to take you away! So please don’t make this hard! I know you want to leave! I understand! But that can’t happen!”
You were quiet, your body feeling limp as he had hit a sensitive point on your body. “O-okay...” you muttered out, tears brimming the corners of your eyes. “I’ll stay.... I-“
Before you can finish, Killua hugged you tighter than ever before, knocking the air out of you. You felt like you could pass out, that feeling soon coming to reality as black dots filled your vision. He had somehow managed to manipulated you again. His worry getting the best of you.
Curse you for being so damn sympathetic.
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ihatebnha · 3 years ago
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touch love language bakugo... idk how you see it but i like to self project in the sense that 1) i am very reserved and take forever to get into relationships and 2) because of that touch is Sacred and being able to play with someone's hands or dig my face into their neck or just touch legs or even just have a hand on them is very special and intimate to me. just very meaningful. so either its a love language or im touch starved and i like to think bakugo can relate 🪱 but id love to hear your take on this bc your interpretation of bakugo is beautiful
worm anon! i wasn't sure you'd ever come back... im so happy to see u!!! thank u SO MUCH for enjoying my bakugo so much!!!
(warnings: none i dont think! there is an indented TL;DR at the bottom if you're curious but don't feel like investing)
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GOD THOUGH, I literally think about this so often it’s hard to even remotely EXPRESS…
And just a fair warning before I start, I am… going to be extremely self indulgent to MYSELF here because my thoughts on the subject are like… my main comfort headcanons of all time EVER that I literally think about 24/7… so just bear that in mind when I say...
I think Bakugo hates being touched.
Maybe… hate is the wrong word because I don’t doubt that he’d get used to it in a long term relationship (and I know people would argue otherwise)… but I really just don’t see touch as being one of Bakugo’s love languages at all, and think that, just like you, he’d be really, really slow to it and it'd be a major thing for him when he did finally get to the point where he was comfortable with it.
I have a lot of reasons for this… mainly, I literally fucking hate being touched and cuddled, and think that Bakugo is thee number one guy who’d respect your space because he needs his…
But also, I don’t see his parents as being very touchy, either (AKA: touch as a love language wasn’t taught to him), nor do I think that Bakugo seems like, a lovey-dovey type person in general who’d be okay with people expressing (any kind of) affection with him for a very long time…
(Yes he likes his friends, yes he likes hanging out with them… but love seems like something (and I think this is actually mildly canonical) that makes Baku itchy/uncomfortable ALSO, because 1. he just doesn’t tend to express himself in that way, and 2. [love + touch] therefore aren’t things he’s automatically “advanced” at… so he doesn’t rely on them as his main forms of communication.)
In fact, as someone who sorta relates to this, I’m even more convinced by such logic because it’s like… Bakugo’s such a calculated and smart guy, you know? So I think everything he’d do with a romantic partner would be a conscious decision that he’d really have to put some amount of effort into…
(Not to mention how often he doges people trying to touch him in general, anyway)…
Though that’s not to say he’s anti-touch FOREVER or whatever (lol)… just that, I can see him taking fucking forever to both understand and get used to it, leading to this idea that he probably doesn’t even like touching for a long time once you start dating, even if it’s from YOU.
(Fron boundary issues and high disparity tolerance, lol.)
To diverge from the subject just a little bit, though… I see Bakugo’s main love languages as acts of service and quality time… because just like being a hero, showing someone you care about them means TAKING care of them… not necessarily “proving” it through “superficial” means (don’t worry though, I’m using those words lightly)…
I think some examples of ways he shows affection towards you (that are similar in nature to touch but don’t involve it), are like… sitting next to you, doing very mundane and basic things with you (like shopping), watching you do things… and h he pushes himself very hard to ask how your doing and have conversations with you that don’t involve himself…
BUT ANYWAY, these are things I try so hard to encompass in my writing… because my main thoughts about Bakugo and touch are basically… when he’s finally ready to let you in on touching him... romantically (it being that his body is a weapon he is always using), it’s both a HUGE HUGE HUGE step up in trust AND comfort for him, and something he’s doing specifically to show that he loves you, not just because he wants to.
SO, that’s to say… TL;DR: romantic touch isn’t something that comes naturally to Bakugo, so when he does touch you… it’s a big deal. He’s the type of guy who wants to do things FOR you rather than… physically express himself TO you. He has a strong sense of personal space and boundary due to his quirk and pretty anti-romantic (at first) nature... which goes away once he's really learned trust you and has deep-dived into the relationship...
Some touch things I think Bakugo would enjoy include... leaning on his shoulder or being thigh-to-thigh with him, putting your feet on his lap, SHARING THE BED/COUCH WITH HIM, checking his temperature, and the like... those things are special to him, too❤️
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(Also, this whole write-up isn’t to say Bakugo wouldn’t have sex with you throughout this process if that’s what you wanted… just that he’d probably be weird about cuddling after… either by turning away or holding you loosely and whatnot LOL.)
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