#i probably also need a psychiatrist but oh well

[yourlocaldisneyvillain]

i really need a new therapist

[savanir]

DP x DC prompt [3]

during one of the final psych evals at Arkham right before he gets to be released, the whole thing wrapped up so tidy, just a little relapse which involved a robbery. Getting sent back to Arkham, but he got to stay at the asylum so long that he no longer has to serve a prison sentence, score!

But during that eval his overseeing psychiatrist recommended him to have a change of scenery, some fresh non polluted air.

Riddler was rather convinced the guy was making this recommendation to everyone in Arkham in their own weird way to convince them to just leave Gotham and become someone else's problem. should he notify Batman about it somehow? nah, it’ll be more interesting to see how this is gonna turn out in the long run.

But can he leave the state? Can he even leave the city? he never really bothered to look into it, at least not legally, up until now if he felt he needed to leave for one of his plans he just did it.

Turns out he can, it’s a whole hassle and a half though, first a judge and then a probation officer and he’s pretty sure both were like “what the hell is this psychiatrist guy thinking!?” but at the same time, shrink probably knows what he’s doing (WRONG) so he’s allowed to go visit out of state family or whatever.

he had to wear this nice ankle monitor though, Wayne Enterprises™ tech, not overly bulky but still very present. real fancy, and a fun extra challenge heh.

now as for a good reason to leave New Jersey he’s going to need distant relatives, and he finds some, great grandpa walker also has a son, who had a son who had a daughter Madeline, who married some guy Jack Fenton, and she lives somewhere out in the boonies Illinois. great he’ll visit her.

far enough away in all sense of the word that there is no way she knows anything about him. it would be best to call her first though, be polite about it.

“hello, you have reached Fenton works, this is Maddie speaking” 

“Riddle me this-” ah whoops, habit, oh whatever, “we don’t share parents, but certainly a part of your life, from laughter to strife. Who am I?”

there is a pause …  he’s going to be a bit disappointed if she hangs up if he’s honest.

“cousins~” comes the cheery reply.

“correct! the name is Edward Nygma, we are distantly related you and I and well-”

“oh you simply must come visit!” 

well this was rather easy, perhaps a little too easy, but she lives in the midwest so maybe just going with whatever some guy says over the phone is normal there? stranger danger not really a thing in a small town where everyone knows everyone?

things start to make a little more sense once he gets there and he’s starting to think some things might run in the family. like a preference for the colour green and weird hyperfixations and genius bordering on insanity. Though that remains to be seen, Jack does not seem like a very bright light after his very enthusiastic welcome.

their kids however are observant and sharp. young Jasmine is wasting no time trying to psychoanalyze him. and the boy, Danny, he had not really meant to and he swears he’s sticking with calling the kid Danny so he wouldn’t seem overly familiar, but he might have called him little bird a couple times now.

but that’s all whatever, he’s playing nice here. and he doesn’t even have to worry about his eccentricities tripping him up because this place is insane.

There actually is a local teen vigilante active but he seems about as loved as he’s disliked. and the ghost boy’s enemies are basically all his own kind, which another crazy thing to now know about. ghost. they are real actually, how is Gotham not completely overrun? and how do they even work? and where do they keep coming from?

Edward might be getting a little sidetracked here. He had fully intended to sneakily get his next big game plan underway all the way out here, ankle monitor be damned. but he hasn’t made any progress at all.

Instead he’s been listening to Madeline and Jack to maybe figure out what the deal is with these ectoplasmic entities, he has to know, at this point he might go crazier if he doesn’t. 

He’s making Jasmine promise him not to get her doctorate in Gotham, he’s going back and forth with space riddles with Danny.

so yeah the whole thing kinda just became a vacation, maybe the psychiatrist had the right idea after all? hmm nah, probably not. but this is fun. He’s thinking about recommending this place to some of the others.

It's different enough to get the vacation feel, but enough crazy shit happens to make it all feel like home.

it is not until Maddie wants to talk with him about potentially switching the position of godfather of Danny to him rather than some weird rich friend of theirs that Edward realizes he might have lost the plot somewhere

Apparently the little bird basically begged them with a powerpoint presentation on how he likes Edward so much more than that Vladimir guy. 

And honestly, the fellow sounds like a Dracula Lutho so even if it’s kinda sad Edward can understand why he’d be considered a better option. Even if the guy has more money and a huge company that makes him said money. And it’s not like the Fentons know about his Riddler activities.

Thinking it over, Edward does think that Danny would like Gotham and Wayne has that space program thing right? The kid is definitely smart enough for that (Nygma certified), and yeah Edward does quite like their space themed back and forth. So, fuck it, why not, what is the worst that could happen?

He doubts Maddie and Jack are gonna kick it any time soon anyway out here in the boonies, it’s just a title thing, a stamp of approval or something.

he should have known he was going to eat those words later… he had this whole beautifully elaborate trap set up for the whole Batclan, and he was just getting to the good part when his phone went off.

Had to put the whole thing on pause cause that particular contact wasn’t gonna get ignored. He did promise to be available.

If the whole thing he had planned now went tits up he could at the very least laugh later at the reactions of the bats as he told them to “hold up one second, I have to take this.” while they were all in various perilous positions. 

Sadly he did have to go, he had a very distressed godson to pick up.

[slutofpsh]

f1 racer | psh

part two

pairings: park sunghoon

synopsis: f1 racer park sunghoon is the ace of their team until he got into a terrible accident causing of his sudden hiatus. the incident injured his shoulder and affected his mental health. you are hired by his mother to help him get through this tough times as you are one of the best psychiatrist in town. he hated the idea of being vulnerable so instinctively, he hates you. he hates how you try to get into his head for him to open up and he hates his parents for meddling with his life like he’s a kid. but he couldn’t deny that you are exceptionally beautiful and he can’t help his cock from twitching just by imagining pushing you down on your office table, fucking you deep and hard until you can’t think straight anymore.

wc: 15k

warnings: mdni. smut with slight plot, lots of dirty talking, degrading, corruption kink, p into v raw (please always use protection), dom sunghoon, slight rough sex, reader experiencing sexual harassment. IF YOU DON’T LIKE ANY OF THIS PLEASE FEEL FREE TO SCROLL AWAY.

note: i have no right and enough knowledge with medical terms so disregard my claims as it came from my imagination to fit my plot. i’m new with writing smuts so please don’t give rude comments. i am still learning. also please send me asks and reblog my work. it will help a lot. thank you so much!

slutofpsh 2024 © all rights reserved.

After how Sunghoon dismissed you, you didn’t expect him to reach out first. You can still remember the bitter feeling that poisoned your whole system while you’re taking a bath that day. The pain between your legs was incomparable from how your heart was aching that time.

His cold tone and how he asked you to leave right after kept flashing back to your mind. It was such an awful experience. A part of you gets pissed at him for acting like a jerk after taking your v card, but you also know that maybe you caught him off-guard as well. Besides, it was your decision to give yourself to him that day.

It’s honestly making you feel frustrated. Were you crossing the line when you suddenly asked that question? Now you are certain that his ex-girlfriend has something to do with it. Your chest tightens just by thinking about it. He’s still very affected by her. There’s a big possibility that he still have feelings for her.

You threw your head back and stared at your ceiling. This isn’t how it suppose to be. You should be focusing on your work and not worrying about an F1 racer who probably don’t give a care about you.

The wall clock caught your eye and suddenly realized that it will soon be his session for today. Since its wednesday, he will be the one coming at your office. It makes you hopeful and you’re already rehearsing what to tell him the moment he walks in.

You wanted to apologize for suddenly dropping that question out of nowhere without even considering if he’s mentally prepared for it.

Your thoughts are interrupted when your phone chimed.

Sunghoon: I won’t be coming today.

Oh.

Your mind went blank right after receiving that message. All the words you tried to compose and prepare the moment you come face to face with him became useless. You can’t help but to feel a little disappointed and upset about it. He’s obviously trying to avoid you and it hurts just by thinking about it.

The amount of efforts and time you exerted just to be close with him seems to be put into waste when he’s pushing you away like this.

Was it really about the professional reason why you’re hurting? Or was it your heart cracking because of him? Eitherway, you don’t like the feeling of it.

Since Sunghoon is the last patient scheduled for today, you informed your secretary that he’s not coming. Although a little confused, she asked if you need something else or if there’s any patients left that you’re expecting to arrive.

You told her that she can wrap up and go home early today as that’s what you’re about to do. This thing going on between you and the f1 racer sure is draining all of you. You just want to be inside a bathtub, soaked in hot water and having a bottle of wine.

Yeah, that’s right. That could totally help with your mood.

A knock from your office door snapped you back to reality. It slowly opened revealing Hana whose now flashing you a small smile. It didn’t slipped from your friend how you’ve been gloomy these days. She took notice how you’re not mentioning the famous f1 racer as well, assuming that he has something to do with your foul mood.

“Hi,” she greets and you tried so hard to flash her a smile.

“Hello. I thought your sessions are done already? What are you doing here?”

She pursed her lips and walked inside. “I was thinking if you’d want to spend time with me? Your secretary said you’re out early today.”

Your eyes almost watered because of what she said. Hana completely understands you despite your resistance of oversharing informations regarding Park Sunghoon. She understands how you're always been a little private with your personal life.

As a friend, all she can do for you is accompany you whenever you need someone to be there by your side.

The two of you planned to stay in her expensive crib that she’s very proud of. Actually, you really like her apartment since its very pretty and cozy. There’s some vibes in it that you cannot explain.

After stopping to get some snacks, you head over her place. She was continuously talking about this one hot client of her. Obviously, she likes him but gets defensive that she just really finds him hot.

“So...” your head snaps at her direction when she suddenly halt her words like as if she’s waiting for you to look.

You got lost in time and have no idea for how long have you two been sitting outside her balcony talking about random things.

“Hmm?” you hummed, asking her what she wants to say.

She bit her lower lip, contemplating whether to go for it or stop being nosy. After ending the debate with her inner self, she sighs heavily and sets down her glass of wine to fully focus on you.

“What’s up with the F1 racer? He skipped today. That’s new.” she finally dropped the bomb.

You were kind of expecting it, but to actually be asked about it still caught you dumbfounded. You don’t know the exact words to use in order to explain what happened on your last session.

Surely you cannot mention what the director did to you and you’re too embarrassed to tell her he just pop your cherry.

“Maybe he just don’t feel like seeing me today.” the pain in your eyes didn’t slip from her. Hana may not always hear you rant things towards her, but she knew whenever you’re not okay.

She pursed her lips and reaches for your free hand to hold it. “When did he ever feel that way? As far as I remember, Park Sunghoon is totally so into you.” and even winked at you to make you feel better or at least laugh.

“I think I made him mad.” tears fills your eyes to the brim that made her go slightly alarmed.

“Why? What happened?” she gently grabs the glass of wine from you to avoid spilling any of its content.

“I asked him about his ex and after that he started acting cold. Maybe...” your words halt and emotions oozes from your eyes. Hana can see how worried and scared you are by your own thoughts. She felt so bad.

“...maybe he still loves her? What about me, then? What am I to him, Hana?” and tears started to flow out from your eyes, your cries filled his balcony as she tugs you closer to her.

Hana never saw you like this. Crying over something. You always have a strong impression towards her. The type of person who handle things like a boss. Very workaholic and once you set your focus onto something, you will, in no doubt, get it.

And so to see you like this caught her off-guard. She doesn’t know what to do or how to properly comfort you, but of course she tried. She caress your arms as she embraces you, calming you down. She lets you have your moment to let it all out as she assumed you’ve been keeping it in.

“I t-think I fell in love with him, Hana. And I’m so scared because I’ve never felt this way and to think he still loves...” you couldn’t finish your own words as you started crying hard. Hana shakes her head side by side in disapproval, eyes starting to water as well.

“I’m sure he doesn’t love her anymore, y/n. Don’t think it that way, okay?” she cupped your face to make you look at her eyes.

“Just give him time to process his own emotions. He went over through hard times that makes it a little harder for him to decide about things, yeah? Maybe you just caught him off-guard as well.”

Your lips pursed into a pout and realized she had a point. Sunghoon’s going through something. Your priority should be to make him feel better and not confront him about his feelings for you.

You nodded your head and slowly rest your head at her shoulder, cuddling closer. She wraps her arms around your shoulder to pull you closer to her body. She sighs and you felt so much better letting your worries out. Like a big chunk of emotions been lifted off from your chest that made your breathing more stable, your way of thinking became much better as well.

Like what Hana said, you gave him time to settle his own thoughts. Thursday came and you didn’t bothered sending a text message for him as well. You tried hard to divert your attention towards some other things. Thankfully, you’ve managed to do that.

Friday came and you’re very much nervous to go on your day. It was suppose to be your day off from the hospital and Sunghoon’s the only client you have for the day but Hana called you early in the morning.

“Can you please take over my session this morning? It will be just quick I promise! It slipped off from my mind that I have that scheduled today and I already booked my flight to Hawaii.”

Your brows furrowed as you put your coffee to the machine, one hand resting at your hip.

“Hawaii? Suddenly? Why haven’t I heard about this plan?”

Of course you can fill her spot for today. You’ve done it for other people before, there’s no reason for you to decline her offer as well.

She giggles, “I didn’t invite you because I know you won’t come anyway since you’re saving up! This is so sudden too! My mom asked me to tag along their trip and since the director will be out of the country for almost two months, I figured I should go to a vacation as much as I can!”

This time you’re even more intrigued of what you heard. You leaned over the kitchen counter and lift your hand to nibble on your nails.

“T-The director will be gone for almost two months?” you asked, baffled.

“Yes! Haven’t you heard about it? Anyway, you should get more rest now that he’s not around! I know how much you want to earn more, but please have some fun as well. We’ll plan a trip for the two of us once I’m back!” she kept going on that slowly became muffled by your own thoughts.

The amount of relief that dawned you after hearing the news of the director being not around was being overwhelming for you. To think that you don’t have to feel anxious of bumping over that monster relieved you.

“I will buy you something from her as a thank you gift of taking over this client for me!” Hana snapped you back to reality.

You giggled and glanced over the machine when it made a sound, indicating that your coffee is now ready.

“Okay, have fun with your mom.” and then the two of you decided to end the call.

After you get ready for your day, you drove straight to the hospital and met with Hana’s client. Like she said it was just a short consultation and nothing heavy. An hour and a half passes by so fast. Your secretary ringed your intercom to let you know its over.

You guided the client out to the door and tell her she did well for today. She seemed very satisfied with your session and thanked you. A smile is what you responded her before bidding goodbyes with her.

Now, you started preparing yourself to leave and go straight to Sunghoon’s place. Your heart started thumping just by the thought of that man. He didn’t send any messages yet that tells you not to come so you’re somehow hoping he’s expecting to meet you today. I mean, he cannot avoid you forever right?

Eitherway, you already set your mind to go and check him yourself. You wanted to convince yourself that you just want to do your job properly, but you know that you’re doing that fot personal reasons. That you want to come and see him because you missed him so bad.

You heard your office door opens that slightly made you jolt. Thinking it was your secretary, you didn’t bother to look over and check. You just continued fixing your things so you can leave.

“You can leave after I finish here, (name). That’s the only client I’ll be meeting here on the office for today since I will go to the Parks to meet with Mr. Park Sunghoon.” you tried to inform her.

You heard the door closed so you assumed she’s inside. Finding it odd not receiving any responses from her, you decided to turn around to look and you almost drop your car keys at the sight of Park Sunghoon by the door.

He looked so good as usual. His slightly long hair brushed perfectly as he rocks his semi formal attire, one hand inside his pocket. He stares right at your eyes that made your knees instantly weak.

“M-Mr. Park.” you stutter.

He pursed his lips and sighs heavily. He may seem like he’s calm, but Sunghoon’s very nervous right now. He took all of his courage to come here and see you. He knew what he did last time was wrong and he can’t find the will to meet you. Not after treating you that bad. He figured you may hate him now. But damn, he misses you so much. He missed you so bad that he might go crazy if he didn’t come and see you.

He didn’t say anything and started walked towards your direction. You held on your table for support as you can feel your knees getting even weaker as he approach closer. Seeing him again after days of being away from each other just made it even more emotional.

“W-What are you doing here? I was just about to go and meet you—” your words cut as he clash his lips on your shaking lips. He placed his hands on your hips, making sure you won’t fell.

You moaned, eyes getting teary of being overwhelmed. You felt his kisses, his touch and his warmth.

After the heated kiss and when he realized you two needed air, he pulls away. He kept his eyes straight at yours, letting your foreheads touch each other.

“I’m sorry for how I acted the last time. It was such a jerk move.” he whispered sincerely that tugs your heart.

You pout and raised your arms to wrap it over his neck.

“It’s fine. I understand that maybe I went overboard. I shouldn’t have let my personal emotions take over me.”

He licked his lips, taking a short glance at your slightly swollen lips. He was tempted once again after having a taste of something he’s been craving for a while. He sighs, calming himself down. This isn’t about him.

“Let me make it up to you.” and he leans even closer, tugging your body closer to his. His lips dangerously inches away from yours.

A small smile spreads across your face.

“You don’t have to, Hoon.”

He leans and placed a peck on your lips. “I want to. Will you let me take you out on a date tonight?”

Your mouth gapped in surprise. “A date?” you repeat his words, bewildered.

He nods his head, trapping his lower lip over his teeth. Sunghoon pressed his body towards you that made you giggle.

“But we already skipped two of our sessions.” you reminded him. As expected, he seemed totally unbothered.

“Then this will be the third time.” he smirks and arched his brow. “Please?”

You stared straight to his eyes and eventually surrenders.

“Okay.” you agreed that made him smile wider.

“Thank you.” he says and leans for another kiss. You giggled returning his affection and letting yourself be drowned by his kisses. His hand playfully roams around your whole body like claiming his territory.

“I have something for you.” he mumbles after leaning away. You can see how his eyes are starting to be clouded by lust and longing.

It stirs excitement inside you. Just having him this close again and staring at you this way makes your core hot and wet. The way he affects you is crazy. Its even crazier because you know he’s the only one that can make you feel this way.

“What is it?”

A mischievous grin spread across his handsome face before he lets one of his hand go from your hips to slid inside his pocket. Your eyes looked curiously to what he’s trying to get.

He fished out something and you can see its color pink. Your brows furrowed in confusion as to what is that thing. It seems soft and like a toy. Your hand unclasped from him to try and hold the thing he was holding.

“What’s that?” you asked too innocently that made Sunghoon almost go feral. Just the genuine look of innocence in your eyes were enough to make him lose his mind. He thought that during the times he was with you and with all the things you two had done together, he might have corrupted you enough.

But it seems like he was wrong. He hasn’t corrupted you enough for you to know that what he’s holding right now is a small vibrator.

He gulped, trying to calm himself and his dick.

“A vibrator.” he announced that made you instantly blush.

“W-What...” you are unable to ask further question as he moved quickly to carry you and make you sit at your office table.

“Hoon, wait what are you gonna do?”

He smiles, “We’re going to have some fun, baby.” and he placed a kiss at your cheeks.

His hand reaches for your thighs and he spread it enough. You’re about to protest and ask more, but he quickly kisses you to distract you from what he’s about to do. His hand made its way inside your skirt and searches for your underwear.

You moaned and tried to pull away, but his lips just chases yours. He eventually managed to take off your underwear, his bare fingers touching your wet core.

“Ugh,” you moaned sensually.

“Already so wet for me?” he smirks so proudly that made you feel so flushed.

He raised his other hand that was holding the vibrator and placed it near your mouth.

“Coat it with your saliva, baby. So it will go in smoothly.” he instructed, eyes flickering with so much excitement.

You obliges and opens your mouth. Sunghoon stares as he dips the vibrator inside your mouth, your tongue twirling around to make sure every part is fully coated of your sweet saliva.

“Fuck, you look so hot.” he mumbles and pressed his lips at your cheeks before gently pulling it out from your lips, making an unintentional ‘plop’ sound.

Your heads stared down while he placed it at your entrance. It was wet and full of your juice already so it slid easier. You kind of felt the stretch but it was a good one. The kind you’ve missed for a while.

“How does that feel?” he asks carefully as he lifts his gaze to look at your half-lidded eyes.

You gulped, salivating a bit due to pleasure of having something inside you.

“G-Good.”

He nods and grabs this one small device. Your mind is pretty clouded and occupied by that small toy inside of you that you didn’t realized that in order for it to be called vibrator, it needs to vibrate. And that will only happen using that controller Sunghoon’s holding at the moment.

“Okay, let’s start it with the mildest intensity.” he says softly near your ears and pressed something.

You jolt at the sensation it was giving you, a hand grabbing him by his arm. “Oh my gosh,” you mumbled surprised.

He chuckles, “How does that feel, pretty? Much better?”

He leans his forehead to yours as you nod your head slowly. It was a foreign feeling, but it was good. Really really good.

“I think we can put it higher.” he didn’t even wait for what you’re opinion about it and raises the intensity making you open your mouth. Your eyes shut abruptly and the grip over his arms tightened.

“W-Wait, this is too much...” you mumbles feeling everything in you just vibrates and shaking along with this small device.

Your mind are slowly becoming blank and filled with nothing but lust. The vibration is so perfect and the way Sunghoon showers you with kisses makes it even better. He kisses, sucks your skin and sometimes bite you using his canine teeth, making sure he mark you pretty well.

“I’m c-coming,” your words snapped Sunghoon out from his trance as he pulls away and manipulated the controller to make it feel better for you.

As you came, your body loses it strength but thankfully Sunghoon was there to support you, wrapping his arm around your waist. He placed a kiss on your shoulder then at your temple, whispering praises.

“You did so well for me, baby.” he kisses you again at your lips then flashes you a sweet smile.

You smiled and leaned to give him a kiss too. You’re still high from your orgasm that you couldn’t say anything to him. After he pulls away, your eyes watch how he slid your underwear inside his pocket. His eyes are darted at yours when you lift your gaze up to look at him.

He smirks shamelessly, unbothered that he was caught red handed of pocketing your underwear without consent.

“Hey, I can’t go eat dinner without it.” you pout.

He chuckles, “Oh, you can do it. Besides you have that inside you to keep your cum inside.” he smirks that made your eyes grow big.

“What do you mean?”

He fixes your hair, “Am I going to have this inside me while we eat outside?”

He smirks, already giving you the answer.

“Yes. We’re going to have so much fun tonight.” and with that you are left with no choice but to go out on a date with a freaking vibrator inside of you.

You don’t know how exactly you look, but you bet it was awkward. The way you kept moving around, squirming out of discomfort is quite noticeable. You’re inside the elevator and thankfully it was just the two of you heading down at the underground parking lot of the hospital.

Sunghoon chuckles and held your hips tighter, holding your position.

“Stop moving around.”

You grunted, “It feels uncomfy. I feel like my cum will drip out from it.”

He leaned down, lips touching your ears as he whispers, “I bet not. Your pussy is so tight it left no gap for the vibrator.” his raspy voice rings through your ears that made you shiver.

When you arrived at the parking lot, Sunghoon guided you somewhere. It was a black rang rover and a man went out from it then wait patiently until you two came near the vehicle.

You gave him an awkward smile as you still feel bothered by that thing you’ve been keeping between your legs. He bows slightly.

“Let’s go to the restaurant.” Sunghoon says firmly and opened the door for you.

So this is his driver. You’ve been informed by his parents that ever since the incident, he refused to drive. Whenever he have to go see you at your office during wednesdays, he have his own driver to accompany him.

Sunghoon sat beside you and tugs you closer to him while his driver started driving. You felt conscious now that you have another person around you, but it doesn’t seem like the same way for him. Since his touches became more bold.

You gave him a warning look and held his wrist tightly to prevent his hand from entering your skirt completely. His hand was just chilling at your thigh a while ago, and now its slowly moving upwards.

“I just want to check if its still there.” he reasoned out with a grin on his face.

You rolled your eyes at him, “Like it can get out by itself, huh? Of course its still there.” you tried hard to whisper so his driver won’t hear any of this wild things you two had been doing.

He pouts mockingly, “I want to check it myself.” and tugs his arm away to unclasp your hold before he dips his hand further inside your skirt.

You pressed your lips together to prevent any moans from coming out and just lets him do what he wants. This is why you think its dangerous for you to hang around Park Sunghoon often. Because you are too weak for him and you always ends up letting him have his way.

When his fingers touch your core, he graze it gently on your slit and smirk grew wider at the feeling of your cunt being filled. He pulls right after plopping his slightly wet digits inside his mouth to lick it clean. He does all of that while staring shamelessly to your eyes.

The drive towards the restaurant was surprisingly short or he just really kept you occupied the whole ride. It was a fine dinning and thankfully, you dressed pretty appropriately for its aura.

The two of you entered while holding each others hands. Just by the entrance, you can see heads whips towards your direction probably intrigued to see the famous F1 racer out in the open once again. Not to mention that he’s being accompanied by someone unfamiliar to the public.

It made you conscious and a little bit anxious. The feeling of the vibrator inside you isn’t helping as well. Sunghoon did turn it off as you begged him to as you get off from the vehicle. He said that he will allow it only because you behaved and asked nicely.

“Reservation under my name.” Sunghoon tugs you closer to him, hand resting over your waist.

Sunghoon hates the attention he’s having the moment he step foot inside this place, but he thinks he hates the attention that you are gathering even more. More than once he caught a male looking at you like a hungry animal. He fucking hates it. How dare them look at you for more than five seconds? You are his to look at, to admire, to kiss, to claim and to fuck.

“This way, Sir.” the waiter smiles and guidee you inside.

The whole ambiance of the place was romantic and classy. The type of restaurants you see in movies where the people dressed extra nicely to fit the vibe of the place. It was just perfect, if only that thing was not making you feel uncomfy.

Sunghoon beats the waiter to pull a chair for you and you smiled at him. He kissed your hand before sitting at the chair across. He smirks while watching you trying to get comfortable on your seat.

“You good, baby?” he asks meaningfully as the waiter comes back for the menu, handing one each to the two of you.

“Y-Yeah,” and glared at him slightly before trying to look over the food they’re serving.

You’re just in the middle of trying to find something you like to eat when you jolt in surprise. Your eyes instantly darted at Sunghoon, glaring at him. He’s eyes are fixed on the menu while a big evil grin occupies his sexy lips.

He just turned the vibrator on, catching you off-guard and jolt on your seat. The waiter took notice of your sudden discomfort.

“Are you okay, Ma’am?” he asked, very worried.

You flash him a quick smile and pursed your lips tightly right after as the intensity gets higher.

“I’m fine— Ugh,” you groaned and lowered your head in embarrassment. You pressed your legs together, but it just became more intense that way.

“Are you sure? We can—”

“She said she’s fine.” Sunghoon’s strict tone interrups the waiter’s concerned remarks. You glanced at him and you can see him shooting glares at him.

You bit your lower lip and tried hard to control your body from shaking obviously. Its making your head fuzzy and the pleasure clouding your mind. Sunghoon clicks his tongue and proceeds on saying his order.

As he pressed the controlled on its max intensity, the satisfied grin spreads across his face seeing how you reacts. Just seeing how hard you try to control your expression and actions to not fully give into pleasure makes him slightly proud. He kind of wants you to make a mess tho, he’s not going to lie.

“I will order for her too. Is that all right, baby?” he even reaches for your hand that was resting by the table.

You nod your head eagerly, trying to focus on reaching yet another delicious orgasm. Right at this moment, you don’t care if the waiter notices how your legs are shaking or your face too flush from pleasure. All you can think of is to cum hard right there and then.

After the waiter gets your order, he excuses himself and informed you that your order will be ready after ten minutes. The moment he turns around to leave, your legs shakes reaching your climax.

Sunghoon smirks as he watch you slowly going back to your right mind space. With glares shooting straight at him you grit your teeth.

“Why w-would you do that?!”

He smirks, totally not regretful.

“I hate it when men flocks to impress you.”

You furrowed your brows hardly, still high from the orgasm you just had.

“He was just doing his job.”

He tilts his head, unimpressed. “Well I am just doing mine too.”

“What do you mean?”

“Marking what’s mine.” he said that seriously that it made you blush so hard.

Your heart thumped faster and harder that you almost got scared that it will come out from your ribcage. These are his actions that made you confuse if he have feelings for you or not. He’s not saying anything.

He asked something else afterwards to maybe ease the atmosphere. He’s still the Sunghoon who loves to tease you which somehow comforts you. Last time you’ve seen him, you asked him something personal and you got scared it made him cave in his shell once again.

Like what the waiter said, the food will be available after ten minutes. They served it and you two continued eating and talking. It was fun and you cannot believe you are having a date with Park Sunghoon.

You’re just worrying and overthinking about him last Wednesday night. You sure cannot predict what’s about to happen.

After your perfect meal, you’re trying to enjoy the dessert that he ordered for you when naughty Sunghoon once again tries to attack. Your head shakes side by side to stop him, but he was already grinning at you.

He pressed the controller making you jolt.

“H-Hoon,” you moaned.

“Yes, baby?” concern and teasing plays through his tone.

You pursed your lips. “Enough p-please.”

He pout his pinkish lips, “How can I stop when you look so good like that? Such a slut for me.” he says licking his lips while grinning widely.

The sensual look on your face and the way you fight it just so nobody notices turns him on. You’ve always been innocent in Sunghoon’s eyes. An angel. He’s like a very bad wolf trying to prey on you. To corrupt and make you his slut.

Sunghoon palms his dick as it slowly grow harder inside his trousers. He just couldn’t get enough of you.

“N-No...” you whimpered and lowered your head when he pressed it again to rise the intensity.

The pleasure is making you lose your mind. Sunghoon’s already lost his moments ago as he continue palming his erect friend down there.

“Just one more, baby. Cum for me one last time.” he says softly and you gulped.

The way he talks you through it is what’s dangerous. You can never say no to his sweet tone. It’s like it has its own way towards you that convinces and automatically hypnotize you to oblige to his words.

“B-But I c-can’t anymore.”

“Of course you can.” and he even reach for your hand to place a warm kiss on top of it.

He put it at max and you shut your eyes to prevent people from seeing how it rolled at the back of your head. Everything starts to be blurry and to spin.

“I-I’m close...” you mumbles, biting your lip hardly.

Sunghoon licks his lips, “That’s it...” he grabbed your hand and watch carefully while you surrendered yourself into pleasure.

“Hmph,” and another delicious orgasm unfolds.

“Let’s go,” Sunghoon stood up from his sit and approach you. He carefully helps you to stand up. Some customers looked at your direction, but you’re still too high from your previous climax to give care.

“Is she okay?” one waiter approaches after noticing that it seems like you are unwell.

“She’s fine. I just need to get her to the bathroom.” Sunghoon says and excused the both of you.

One waiter guides you two inside a bathroom. She asked if you needed anything more but Sunghoon dismissed her and told her that you just needed space to breath.

The moment she left, he went over the door and locked it. He pushed you over one of the counters, hold you by the hips and easily lifts you up. He made you sit down.

“W-What...” you licked your lips, unable to properly say anything.

He smirks, “You did so well for me, baby. So so good.” he mumbles and spreads your legs and placed a kiss at your forehead once.

His hand reaches for your core and carefully removes the vibrator inside.

“Ugh,” you moaned and groaned a bit at the feeling of that thing being removed from inside you.

Sunghoon take it to his lips and licked all of your juices out from it. It was so sweet, something he missed for days.

“Fuck, I need to have you. Right now.” he announced that made you flutter your eyes slightly open.

With the small gap, you saw him unzipping his pants that made your anticipation rise. Although totally worn out from the multiple orgasms he already gave you from that toy, the thought of having him for yourself excites you the most.

“P-Please.” you begged, gripping over his clothes.

“Please what, pretty?”

You lift your gaze and stared straight to his lustful eyes. It was dark and you can see how dangerous he is. The amount of lust he has for you was unmeasurable. Sunghoon never felt this way towards someone before.

“Please fuck me.”

Sunghoon’s eyes turned darker and dipped his head down to connect his hot lips on yours. He bit your lip to crack an entrance for his tongue to enter your delicious mouth. Your sweet taste overwhelms him and he started to get addicted.

He pressed his body towards you as he carefully pulls out his erect member. He strokes it a couple of times before placing it on your wet entrance. You whimper at the feeling of his hot dick grazing the line of your cunt.

It sent unexplainable pleasure that the two of you sure enjoys at the very moment. Something you two won’t get tired of.

“So fucking beautiful.” he mumbles on your lips and continues giving you messy kisses.

“So beautiful and only for me.” he growled as he slid his cock inside of you.

One hard thrust and he’s all in. Your eyes flutters open, mouth hanging open at the unexpected stretch. The vibrator and couple orgasms sure prepared you, but not enough to feel a slight sting. Sunghoon’s dick is so big for your small cunt.

“Fuck.” he cursed, feeling his dick suffocating inside of you.

“H-Hoon,” you whisper.

“I know baby. Hold on.” and he started to move, thrusting in and out of you. It was so good. The pleasure was too much.

He showed no mercy in using and abusing your pussy as he rutt his cock inside you so hard. He grunts and groaned at the pleasure of having your body this close. He glanced at your privates and just thought how they perfectly fit each other.

“You are mine. You hear me?” he grunts as he continued rocking harder. His thrusts became deeper and faster, fucking you into oblivion.

“Answer me!” he groaned and bit your shoulder when he received no response from you.

“Y-Yes.”

“Yes what?” he stared at you.

“Yes, I am yours.” you mumbled near his lips and he smiled widely before kissing you.

His hips started rutting even harder as both of your climax approaches. The two of you became a mess trying to catch that orgasm you’ve been yearning to have together. A couple of hard thrusts and dirty talking and you exploded first before him.

You throw your head back, eyes shut as you started to see stars fromtl too much pleasure. Sunghoon catches his breath and kissed your collarbones before slowly pulling out his member.

He watch how your mixed cum drips out from your hole. He smiles and use two of his fingers to push them back inside, making you jolt a little.

“Sorry, baby. I don’t want to waste it.”

The two of you tried to make yourself look much more presentable. You’ve been glaring at him through his reflection in the mirror in front of you and he’s been grinning all the time. He looked so hot and handsome, you hate it.

“You look so pretty.” he compliments.

Despite the blushing cheeks you rolled your eyes and twist to face him. You crossed your arms at him and stared. He smirks and put his hands inside his pockets.

“Don’t you think that was too much?” you fired him. He arched his brow, acting innocent about it.

“What do you mean?” he asks.

You clicked your tongue, “I bet they knew what was going on! Its so embarrassing.” you pout.

He chuckled and walks closer placing his large hands at your sides.

“I’m sure they don’t mind. Let’s go?”

“Where?” you looked at him with so much suspicion in your eyes.

“Why are you looking at me that way?”

“The last time you said that you led me here.”

He barked a laughter before kissing your cheeks once. He started guiding you out from that bathroom. Surprisingly, nobody took it as a big deal. Some of them looked genuinely worried of you, but once Sunghoon said that you’re just a little sick they let it go and wish you to feel well soon.

While he was paying for the your meals, you roamed your eyes around and by the entrance someone caught you attention. A familiar elegant girl walks inside with yet another familiar face.

They walked closer and when her eyes darted at your direction, it slightly grew.

“Sunghoon?” she calls softly.

Your head craned to look at Sunghoon and you saw how he stiffened. His hand halted from reaching over his black card he used to pay for their service.

He slowly turned to face the girl and the look on his face is not good. He jaw clenches as he looked at the two people standing a few feet away from you.

As you glance back at that girl, you realized she was the same girl you’ve seen at the elevator. The one who looked dreadful. The other one beside her is familiar as well. If you can remember it right, he’s one of Sunghoon’s team-mates.

“How have you been? I’ve been trying to call you, but they said you are refusing my calls.” she seemed agitated while Sunghoon remained his distant.

A little confused to what is happening, you took notice of his obvious discomfort by their presense. His body language is showing you that he doesn’t want to be here in front of them so you quickly stepped in.

“Hey, done paying?” you asked gently and grabbed his hand. It was cold, sweaty.

Their eyes then darted at your direction. The expression on that girl’s face drastically changed. Her eyes looked at you with so much judgement, raking it up and down.

Sunghoon finally took in a breath after feeling you beside him. He glances at you and seeing how you looked at him with so much care, calms him down. He nods and pursed his lips. You can still feel his hands shaking a little. He’s having a panic attack.

You faced them and smiled, “Hello, I’m y/n. I’m sorry, but Sunghoon and I have to go. I hope to see you guys around some other time.” and with that, you bowed politely before starting to guide him out.

Sunghoon manages to walk well, but you can still see that he’s in panic. When you arrived in front of his vehicle, his driver assisted you to get him inside. You asked him to give you two some space.

You cupped his face after giving him some water.

“Hey, calm down. Breath in,” you gently instructs and caress his arms. “breath out...”

He looked at your eyes and carefully follows them. He can feel his chest tightening for unknown reasons. His fist felt numb and her mind starts to lose focus. You, on the other hand understands that he’s having an anxiety. For what exact reason, you don’t know. But what you’re sure of is whoever those two are, they triggered something in him.

“Baby, I’m here. Just breath. I am here for you. Look at me.” you mumbles and held his hand to place it on your face.

He felt your warmth and his eyes slowly focused on you. He can now clearly see your beautiful face despite the slight darkness inside the vehicle. He felt his heart thumped faster, but this time in a different matter. You made him feel safe and calm.

“I’m s-sorry.” he whispers and your heart cracks at the sight of him.

It was almost like he’s not Sunghoon. He looked so fragile. A part of you felt relieved that he finally shown you this side of him, but your heart couldn’t take it.

You tugs him closer and he gave in. He wraps his arms around your waist and nuzzle closer, enjoying your warmth.

“She’s Natasha.” he mumbles.

Your brows furrowed and realized that he was probably referring to the girl from a while ago. You kept your mouth shut, doesn’t want to ask something that can ruin it again.

“My ex girlfriend.”

You guided Sunghoon inside his house once you two arrived. After he revealed that it was his ex-girlfriend from that restaurant, you don’t know what to feel. Just by thinking of how he reacted, it made you feel things. It made you overthink once again.

“Y/n...” you snapped back to reality when you heard him call you softly.

You craned your head and looked at him laying on his bed. He’s looking at you with slight worry and fear.

“Yes?”

“Please stay with me.”

He never, in the whole duration that you two had been in this set up, he had never asked you to stay. You felt your heart races, hope ignites inside your chest.

Slowly, you strut closer to his bed and he opens his blanket to then scooted away to give you enough space. When you lay down, he pulls you closer to cuddle you.

“Stay for tonight.” he begged.

You sighed and slid your arms over his waist after placing a kiss on his chest. “Okay.”

The two of you fell silent. You’re just caressing his back gently and you have no clue if he’s already asleep or what. All you can think of is how messed up it is to meet his ex girlfriend that way. You’re starting to overthink how he still feels for her or where you stand in his life at the moment.

“That night of the accident...” your hand halts from caressing his back and slowly you pulls away to look at him.

“You don’t have to if you aren’t ready yet.” you gave him an assuring smile.

He looked at you straight in your eyes and leans down to place a kiss on your forehead.

“I want to.” he says firmly.

You gave him a nod and rests your head on his chest once again. You gave him his time, doesn’t want to make him feel uncomfy and just take his precious time.

“On the night before I got into an accident, I planned to go to her place because I felt like I neglected her too much. I was having practice on consecutive days since the competition is near.” he says.

He took a long breath and tries to calm himself to go through the night he got into an accident once again.

“I went to her place and found her...” he gulps. You placed a kiss on his chest and caress his back gently. “I found her naked on top of my best friend.” he finally said it.

Your mouth gapped and slowly pulls away from hugging him. His breathing fasten and you raised your head to look at his eyes. It was brimming with tears and you felt like your heart teared off.

“I j-just can’t believe it. How can they do that to me? My girlfriend and my own best friend? That’s so fucked up.” a tear escapes his eyes as he clenched his jaw harder, trying to compose himself.

You cup his face and listened to him carefully.

“I stormed out from her apartment after cursing them out. I drove while still being so angry. The next thing I know, I was in the hospital.”

He pursed his lips together and stared at your eyes. Sunghoon didn’t hold back, he lets you see his vulnerability. He doesn’t know but if there’s someone he can show this side of him, he knew it was you.

“I refused to drive again because I feel like it was the start of how things got messy between all of us. She said I neglected her and all I can think of is that race. My best friend said I took away all the spotlight and left him out of it. He was pushed out of the picture and I am the only one people can see.” he stated, he looked so broken and betrayed.

You may not know a lot about these people, but what you heard from him was enough for you to feel a slight hatred towards them.

“Hey, listen to me.” you sniffed, tears pooling your eyes.

Your hands cupped his face and his hands slowly rested over your hips. His eyes stared at you, trying to listen like you said.

“The issue with your ex girlfriend, it was not right for her to make neglection as a reason to cheat on you. Yes, you might have your short comings as her boyfriend but I am pretty sure you two can solve that problem together by talking.” you carefully make him understand. He stays silent, hand slowly caressing your waist up and down.

“Your best friend,” you started and the picture of the two of them you saw from the internet months ago flashes back to your mind. They look so happy in that photo and yet who knew this could happen?

“You can never cure insecurity, baby. Even if you try to give him the time to shine, you can never fix his own issues for him. If he cannot be supportive of you, then he doesn’t deserve you.” you rest your forehead over his.

“Don’t blame yourself for something you don’t have control of. Even if you don’t neglect her, what assurance do you have that she will not do that to you? If its meant to happen, it will happen. Just like racing.” you smile gently at him, tears streaming down your pretty face.

Sunghoon raises one of his hand to wipe off those tears and kiss you once on the cheek.

“Racing and you are meant to be together. You shine differently behind those wheels and you love racing. Don’t let these people take away your dream.” and you sincerely told him.

Something tugs inside Sunghoon’s heart as he leans in to give you a slow heated kiss on the lips. That night, he couldn’t be more thankful that he have you beside him. You spent the whole time cuddling and enjoying each other’s warmth.

The next day, you left after giving him smooches. He refused on letting you go, but you told him you have an importang meeting for that day. He was a little sulky so you had to give him a head to boost his mood a little.

He walked you out and waves cutely, the firm disapproval of you leaving flashes across his handsome face. His bed hair and slightly crinkled white shirt just gave more vibe to you, making your stomach churns and wetting you down there.

Sunday came as well, Hana went back and you decided to spend it with her. Sunghoon kept on texting you. Thankfully he wasn’t that sulky about it.

“Doctor, that was your last patient.” your secretary announced after she knocks and opens the door to your office.

You smiled and told her she did well today. It’s monday already and you’re off to go see Sunghoon at his place for his session.

Speaking of which, your smile grew after seeing his caller i.d flashing through your phone.

“Yeah?”

“You’re at your office?” he asks.

“Uh-huh. Why? I’ll just fix my things and I’ll go straight to your place.” you informed him.

You can hear some muffled background sounds from the other line, like he’s walking or something.

“Nah, stay there. I’m almost at your floor.”

“Huh? What are you doing here?” you asked, confused.

“Picking you up. See you in a bit, baby.” and he ended the call.

You couldn’t help but to smile widely just by thinking he came here to fetch you. Not long after, a knock can be heard from your office door. With excited hops you went to open it for him. A big grin is what greets you.

“Baby!” you greeted cheerfully and threw yourself at him. It made Sunghoon giggle and press kisses on your lips right away.

One of his hand rests over your waist, the other one holding something. After being satisfied of the affections you shared with each other, you pulled away and stared at him.

“You didn’t have to come and pick me up, you know?” but the smile on your lips almost rips face.

“We’ll go out on dinner.” he says that made your brows arched. You’re about to say something when he beats you into talking.

“With my parents.” he added that made your face turn pale instantly.

You’ve seen Mrs. Park a couple of times throughout the process of your sessions with Sunghoon. She is nice, except that you still find her a little intimidating. His father tho, despite showing his trust on you that day they seek for your professional help, he intimidates everything in you.

“You okay, baby?” and he pulls you closer to him.

“I’m nervous. Why are we suddenly having dinner with them?” you asked a little warry.

He smiles and kissed your cheeks, finding you adorable like this. He placed the paperbag he’s been holding ever since he arrived. Your eyes darted at it with slight curiosity.

“You can wear this dress for tonight.”

While staring at his expressive eyes, you realized you’ve got no choice but to go with him. Thankfully, he did gave you enough time to get ready and make yourself look more presentable. You have no idea what’s the dinner for since Sunghoon didn’t quite made it clear.

After an hour or two, he guided you towards the elevator. His coat rests on your shoulder to keep you warm while you go down to where he parked.

“Where is your driver?” you asks, roaming your eyes around to search for his familiar range rover.

Instead, he guides you over into a red sports car. With hopeful eyes, you glanced silently at him. He smirks and opened the passenger seat to the two-seater vehicle.

“I’ll be driving us tonight, pretty.” he finally confirms and you couldn’t explain how happy you are at that moment.

He leans and kissed your shoulder before helping you to get inside. You took the time admiring the inside of his car. It was very beautiful. The kind of car you think that fits Sunghoon, the famous F1 racer. His range rover is not bad, but this one fits him even more.

“What?” he scoffed while starting the engine when he noticed how your stares lingers.

“Have I told you how sexy you are?”

He chuckled and smirked widely.

“Well, this sexy man will eat you later tonight.”

You blushed and quickly swat his arm quickly. “You always find a way to ruin the moment with your horniness.”

He laughed and leans to kiss you on your cheeks swiftly, “What can I say? I just couldn’t get enough of you.”

The ride was short and you can feel your whole system panicking the moment he handed his keys to the vallet. He offered his hand and you accepted it as he guided you inside. Just days ago, you were inside a fine diningr restaurant and now you are here once again. What’s even more thrilling is that his parents will join you.

The waiters greets you with full enthusiasm and helped you find your table. They informed the two of you that his parents were already there.

“Doctor (Surname).” his Mom flashes you a big smile the moment she sets eyes on you.

Compared to the last time you met them, their aura seems to be lighter. His Dad looked a little more friendlier. A small smile plays through his lips as he silently watch you two approach the table.

You bowed politely and accepted the sudden hug from his mother. She’s always nice, but never to this extent. It caught you off-guard.

Sunghoon pulls the chair for you and waits for you to have a seat before taking his.

“We already ordered our food! I hope you don’t mind, Doctor (surname).” she says with so much elegance.

You smiled, “Not at all. Apologies for being a little late.”

“Oh, no need! I mean we did arranged this dinner so suddenly.” she giggles.

You have no idea what she thinks about you and where you stand in her son’s life so you feel a little awkward. Despite the large leap between your relationship with Sunghoon, he didn’t confirmed anything yet.

You felt his arm resting at the rest of your chair. It caught his father’s eyes so you felt conscious and made sure not to lean back. His Mother was the one who carries the whole conversation. She seems excited and so you make sure you respond well to her.

“So Doctor (Surname)—”

“Y/n, Mom. Call her by her first name. You’re too formal.” Sunghoon interrupts her while the waiters starts to serve the food.

“Is it okay with you, dear?” she asks.

You eagerly nodded your head as you find it a little awkward to be called by your surname all the time.

“Please enjoy the meal, y/n.” Sunghoon’s father said that made you glance at his direction. You nodded and all of you started eating.

Sunghoon kept looking after you that even while his father and him discusses about something, he keeps on assisting you. You blush, feeling a little shy that his mother will soon take notice and ask what’s between the two of you.

“You’re probably wondering why we suddenly asked to have dinner with you.” she started after you finished the main meals and now at your desserts.

You nodded and patiently wait for what she’s about to say. She pursed her lips and you can see her eyes softening, slightly brimming with tears.

She reaches for your hand and the two male kept silent, watching the two of you. Sunghoon’s hands moves and rests at the small of your back, giving it subtle caress.

“We want to thank you for looking out for Sunghoon and for helping him. We really did the right choice of asking for your help.” she sincerely said.

You smiled, “It was my pleasure.”

She smiles, “When he told us that he wants to undergo surgery and to drive for (f1 team) once again we were so happy. We couldn’t thank you enough!”

Your mouth gapped at what you just heard. The shock on your face was too evident that his Mom looked at you with amusement.

“W-What?” you asked, totally confused.

“Wait, he didn’t told you?” his Mom asks.

You shook your head side to side and heard Sunghoon heaving a sigh from beside you. He pushed himself from resting at his chair.

“It was suppose to be a surprise for her, Mom.” he says that made you look at him with teary eyes.

“Surprise.” he smirks.

“Are you really...?”

He nods his head, staring at you with an unknown look on his face. His affection for you oozing that even his parents noticed it right away. They didn’t need to ask or for their son to confirm it. From just how he holds you and looks at you, they can tell that he’s very fond of you.

“I’m so happy for you!” and you caged him with a tight embrace.

The dinner continued with a lighter atmosphere. You shared conversation with his Mom as she starts telling you stories about his childhood which you find really entertaining.

“Thank you for tonight.” you smiled widely at his Mother when its time to bid goodbye.

She pursed her lips and approaches for yet another warm hug. “Thank you for coming into our son’s life, y/n.” she whispers only for you to hear.

Your heart thumps and was unable to say anything else after she pulls away to give her son a hug this time. They waved and Sunghoon guides you towards his sports car.

“She likes you so much.” he says after putting his seatbelt on.

“Well your Mom is a sweetheart.”

He smiled agreeing. He started the engine and drove. You noticed that he its not the direction back to the hospital so you glanced at him.

“You aren’t taking me back to the hospital?”

He glanced at you, “Why? You left something?”

“My car is there.”

He kept his eyes at the road, “You’re going home with me tonight. You don’t need your car.”

You pursed your lips into a pout, “But I have work tomorrow.”

“We can ask someone to buy you work clothes and I can drive you to the hospital tomorrow since I also need to see the surgeon my Mom was talking about.”

Your eyes grew out of excitement.

“Okay, I can accompany you before I go to work.”

So it was final. The two of you made it to his place and decided to cuddle. Legs tangled with each other, your head laying over his chest as he hugs you close to his body. Sunghoon couldn’t ask for anything else. Just by having you like this while your hearts beats in sync with each other was enough.

The two of you spent the whole night just enjoying the warmth and comfort that escalates between you. It was a wholesome moment that probably will be cherished for as long as you can remember.

“Fucking fuck!” Sunghoon’s rasp voice moaned as he continued rutting deep and hard from behind you.

It was morning the next day and nothing’s better to start your day with a morning fuck. So here you are on your second orgasm for today, face pressed down on the pillow while he take you deliciously from behind. You can feel his length reaching all the right spot perfectly.

“H-Hoon, just like that!” you screamed.

“Pussy so tight for me. So good, so fucking good.” he leaned and bite on your skin before rocking even harder.

When you’re about to reach your climax, Sunghoon flips you around so you can face him. “I want to see your beautiful face while I cum deep inside you.” he groaned and once again find his pace.

You two were a moaning mess, desperately getting drowned by too much pleasures.

“P-Please, I'm cumming.” you mumbled, tears swells over your eyes.

He groped your chest and continued fucking you hard. Sunghoon licks his lips as he make sure he is hitting it deep and right. The amount of pleasure your pussy is giving him is out of this world. For him, nothing can match this. You are the only one.

“Cum with me, baby.” he demands that you completely obliges as eyes rolls back hardly after your release.

After a couple of thrust, Sunghoon shoots his hot seeds deep inside your womb, making sure he paints and claims you enough. He leans in while still giving you lazy thrusts and kissed you on your lips.

He plops beside you and you’re both trying to catch your breaths.

“We need to get ready.” you announced and sat up. His eyes follows you silently.

“Can’t we just go tomorrow instead?”

You shook your head in disapproval. “No. We have to do your sessions tomorrow so we have no time. Besides, you have to meet with your surgeon.”

After so many attempts of making him leave the bed and get ready, you finally succeeded. He drove you to the hospital.

“We’ll go to your surgeon first.” you left him with no choice.

Sunghoon silently follows, ignoring the eyes that obviously watches him after recognizing who he is. His tall figure, handsome face and the way he carries himself just catches attention easily.

“Excuse me, is doctor Kang available at the moment?” you ask the attendant nurse.

Her eyes lits up at the sight of you and smiles. “Yes, doctor.” she response.

“Great! May I ask what time is his appointment with Park Sunghoon?”

The nurses eyes brightens, “Mr. Park Sunghoon? Oh, Doctor Kang has been waiting for him for twenty minutes. His Mom already made the appointment last night.”

You smiled excitedly, “Thank you! I’m sorry for being late, we were caught on traffic. Can we go inside now?”

She nods and just informs Doctor Kang that his patient just arrived. You walked towards Sunghoon who have a placid expression on his face.

“Let’s go. I will walk you inside and I’ll go.”

“You’ll leave me there?” he asked with a tone of betrayal.

“I have work to do.”

“But I need you there.”

You sighed, “I’ll just meet with my client and then I will come back here. Okay?”

He still looked unsatisfied, but you pulled him towards the office of his surgeon. When you entered, his head lifts and eyes widen in surprise to see you. It didn’t slip from Sunghoon. The delightful look on his face the moment he saw you walking inside stirs something inside him.

He walks near you, back pressing on your back.

“Doctor (surname), what a surprise.” he greets and stood up from his table.

“Oh, I just accompanied Sunghoon here.” and now his eyes darted at his direction.

The doctor seem to be surprised again and quickly offered a hand. Didn’t want to be rude, Sunghoon tries to keep his cool and accepted it.

“Its such an honor to finally meet you, Mr. Park.” he says.

He gave him a short nod, looking a little snobby. Your lips lifts a bit, remembering how he’s just the same the first time you two had met.

“How’d you know him?” he curiously asked you.

You smiled, “I’m his psychiatrist,”

“And my girlfriend.” Sunghoon added that caught you off-guard, resting his hand over your waist.

The smile on his surgeon’s face fell, but he tries hard to pull it back.

“Oh, I s-see.” he awkwardly stated.

You blinked and with blushing cheeks, you realized it was your cue to leave them two alone.

“I’ll see you l-later?” you stuttered.

Sunghoon seemed unbothered and even pleaced a peck on your lips before finally letting you go. The whole time you’re walking towards your building, your mind was occupied. You cannot think of anything else but what Sunghoon just said.

Girlfriend? Did he really just said you are his girlfriend? Your stomach churns and heart hammered hardly inside your chest.

It took everything in you to shove that thought off of your mind in order to focus on your work. Your sessions went surprisingly well regardless of being a little distracted because of the F1 racer.

After your last session, you heard a knock from your door and Sunghoon went inside. You smiled while still writing something at your folder.

“So...” you started and tilts your head at him.

“Since when did I became your girlfriend?” your tone sounds teasing. He smirks and leans in to drop a peck on your lips.

“Since I asked you out on a date.”

You furrowed your brows, “The day we met after not seeing each other for days?” you tried confirming it to him.

He nodded his head innocently.

“I thought you already knew that we’re already dating since I asked you out.”

You blushed, “Do you even like me?”

He narrowed down his brows and stared right at your face. “No.” his quick answer shoots you straight to the chest. It was painful.

He grabs your hand and gently guides you to stand up only to tug you closer to him. He wraps his arms around your body.

“I love you.” the three words came out from him naturally that you’re completely dumbfounded.

You blinked, “A-Are you serious?”

Sunghoon chuckled, finding you adorable.

“I am crazy for you, y/n. In case you failed to notice.”

You smiled and tip-toed for a kiss on his lips. “I love you too.”

His cheeks perks up in so much satisfaction after hearing you utter those three words. You never knew that you two will end up in this situation. You were just overthinking about this and now it was settled. There’s nothing more you can ask and just enjoys being warmly wrapped between your boyfriend’s warmth.

Almost two months had passed and you cannot be happier. It was well spent with Sunghoon as you two grew in love with each other. He was badly smitten over you as much as you are to him.

His surgery went well too and he’s now on his therapies for him to get back in the right shape. The doctor said once he's over with all of this, he’s good as new like before. He can go back on track and win races again.

“Come in!” your cheerful voice echoes inside your office after you heard a knock from your office door.

You’re done with your session today and just getting ready to leave. Sunghoon’s not responding from your text an hour ago so you assumed you won’t be meeting him again today. He’s been really busy with his therapies lately and you completely understand.

Right now, your top priority is for him to get better and nothing else.

“Miss me?”

Your hand halts from putting your things inside your bag. Shivers ran through your spine and cold sweats all over you. The familiar horrifying voice you almost forgot about rings inside your head, instantly triggering that traumatic experience you had.

Slowly, you turned around to face the person standing right by the door. The smile on his face terrified you.

“M-Mr. Cha.” you stuttered while looking at him with nothing but fear on your eyes.

“Nice to see you too, y/n.” he trailed his gaze from your face down to your body. And when you saw how he licked his lips as he does that disgusts the hell out of you.

“I see you’ve been prettier while I was gone.” he walks closer and you couldn’t even move a muscle. You are pierced right at your position, unable to even say anything.

You wanted to run as fast as you can, but your stupid feet just could not move. Like it was glued or something.

“How have you been?” his hand raised to touch your face and you moved away. He doesn’t seem to like what you did so he grabbed your hair.

“Being feisty, eh?” the sarcasm looms over his tone as he pulled your head backwards, he took his time admiring your beautiful face up close.

The director can’t remember the very first time he ever started to feel the attraction towards you. Maybe it was when his father introduced you to him as the newly hired psychologist for the hospital. He still remember how bragged that you’re one of the top students in your university and the hospital managed to pull you.

He couldn’t help but to agree. It was indeed a lucky thing they managed to have you.

“P-Please don’t do this...” your tears rolled down your cheeks and lips shakes in so much fear.

Just by thinking of going through the same process like before terrified you. But who you are kidding? You didn’t even know why you bother to plead when you knew very well he wouldn’t listen.

Mr. Cha smirks and started peppering you with kisses. You grunts and cried in resistance, but he’s just more powerul than you.

As tears silently rolled down your face while this man was assaulting you, Sunghoon flashes through you mind. How you wished he can be here to protect you and prevent this thing to happen. You should’ve had said to him what happened before.

That’s the thing. No matter how many times you try, you can’t. Fear and embarrassment takes over whenever you try to tell him about that day. You know he would understand, its just your own fear is hunting you.

On the other hand, Sunghoon’s all smiley while he parks his car at the underground parking lot of the hospital. He’s just in time to pick you up from your shift.

He felt bad that therapies had been taking all of his time and he couldn’t spend more time with his lovely girlfriend. Tomorrow, he’s off to leave the country for a week of seminar and therapy. It would be the last one before the doctors allowed him to go on full training.

He figures he can go see and spend the night with you before he leaves for a few days. He will miss you the most.

As the elevator tings at your floor, he steps outside and saw that the table of your secretary was vacant. Seems like she left already. He’s pretty sure you are still here since he didn’t receive any messages that you left your office.

When he stepped closer, he can hear muffled sound coming from inside. Things being moved and some grunts. He slowly pushed the door open and the flower he was holding fell to the cold floor.

His whole body felt numb and his ears ringed at the sight in front of him. He can feel his whole body feeling cold, mind going blank.

“What the fuck...” he said that made the man holding you moved away.

Your teary eyes grew and you quickly fixed yourself as Mr. Cha managed to push your skirt up until your waist. You still have your underwear on, but the scene itself was sensual enough for Sunghoon to react this way.

“H-Hoon...” you called softly and tried to stand up properly.

When he looked at you with the hint of betrayal flickering through his eyes, your heart drops. He misunderstood everything. He clenched his jaw and took a step backwards, shaking his head from side to side.

“N-No! It isn’t what you t-think—”

You squealed when he step forward and took a hold of Mr. Cha’s collar. With dark and dangerous eyes he glares right at him. He threw a punch with no hesitation.

“Fuck you!” he shouted.

You quickly went to stop him before he unwillingly damage his shoulder again. Thankfully, he did let you but your heart broke when he shoved your hold off from him. He glanced at you with cold eyes and left the room.

You got stoned in your position for a while before finally composing yourself. Without much thought inside your head, you grabbed your jacket and phone to come after Sunghoon. He was no longer in the elevator and so you headed down the parking lot hoping you can catch up on him.

“Sunghoon!” you called out and scurry over to his sports car. Surprisingly, nobody was there.

A part of you felt relieved that he didn’t go and drove away using his car while he’s feeling that way. You’re still very worried. You fished your phone from your pocket and dialled one of his friend’s number.

“Y/n?” his surprised tone greets you after answering your call.

“Jake! Is Sunghoon with you?”

“Huh? He just left to go see you. Is he not there yet?”

You bit your lower lip and another set of tears attempts to stream down your face. Just being reminded of how horrible and hurt he looked moments ago hunts you.

“W-We had a fight. Can you please call him? Please? I’m scared that he’ll get into another accident.”

You heard background noises from the other line and follows, “All right. Jay and I will look around for him. Don’t worry too much and be safe.” he says that send instant relief.

“Thank you.” and you crash down the pavement near his parked car.

It’s unbelievable how these things are happening to you right now. As far as you remember, you’ve never did anyone wrongly to the point for you to suffer this way. Nobody deserves to be assaulted and silenced that way. But you are scared. To think that you shouldn’t be the one to feel ashamed but still do is depressing.

As expected, he refused to see you. His friends did confirmed that they had found him somewhere and safely took him to his house. It was enough for you. The last thing you’d want is for him to get into trouble because of you.

You headed home as well, praying so bad that everything will be fine soon. You’ve been so happy with Sunghoon lately that you lost track of time. The director is back after being out of the country for a while. You’re a bit dumb to think that he will stop once he sees you’re already dating somebody.

The next day, you’re about to head over to Sunghoon’s house but to your dismay he’s off to do his last therapy. It slipped off your mind as well. Now, it made you feel bad even more. He might have went there to come see you since he will leave for a few days.

You planned to come after him, but it may be not the best choice. His mind is probably occupied and he needs time to collect his own thoughts. The best thing you can do right now is resign from your job and wait for him to come back. You can afford losing that big opportunity, but not Sunghoon. Not him.

On the other hand, Sunghoon’s on his second day out of the country. He still out of it. He’s body is here, but his mind is clearly left back at you. His heart too. He can still feel his chest tightening whenever he recalls how he sees another man touching and kissing you that way.

“That seminar is so boring!” his head craned over to one of his friend as he settles down beside him. He placed his food on the table and glanced at Sunghoon once.

“You’re too quiet these days, hyung. You missed Y/n noona that much?” he teased and even nudge him over the shoulder.

He ignored what he said and remained silent. He was right. Even after what he saw, he can’t deny that he’s been missing you so much.

“But you know Cha Jin? The director of that hospital she's working on?” he stated that made Sunghoon stops from fidgeting over his fingers.

Just by merely hearing that guy’s name sets fire inside him. It boils his blood that he wants to go straight to where he is and punch him nonstop until he passed out.

His friend seemed to not notice how his expression changed and just continued talking about this director.

“He used to be my cousin’s batchmate and he said that guy harassed a lot of girls before! He even mentioned if it wasn’t for his family’s money and power, he would have been already in jail.”

Sunghoon stunned at what he just heard. He suddenly got reminded of how he caught you and that guy that day. Him pressing himself over you while your eyes brim with tears.

Your eyes....

He cursed inwardly for not noticing it right away and for letting his emotions take over him completely.

He abruptly stood up from his seat that surprised even his friend. He looked at Sunghoon with confused eyes.

“Hyung?”

“I’ll go first.” he says and started pressing something over his phone.

“G-Go where? Hyung!” he slightly panic at the sight of the older one gathering some important things.

“Home. Tell Mr. Lim I left because of an emergency.”

Sunghoon didn't even let his friend to say anything else and just proceed on leaving that place. He put his phone over his ears and wait for the other person to answer the call.

“Yes, Mr. Park?”

“I want to file a case.” he says seriously, fist hardly clenched while talking to his lawyer.

He wants so bad to ruin Mr. Cha for doing that and he wants to punch himself for being too dumb to notice. Sunghoon asked for an immediate flight back home and tried to organize everything that will be needed.

The next day, you went over your office to gather some things. Honestly, you have no enough courage to go there. You knew you couldn't stand being in that room for long right after what he just did to you.

You hate it because you’ve put so much work and effort just for that place to feel cozy and safe. He just ruined all of it. He’s disgusting and a monster.

Just as you’re hurrying to put all the stuff you can fit inside the small box you brought, your door bursts open.

“Leaving without saying good bye?”

You whipped your head to face him with piercing eyes. Seeing him flashing a smile and having the face to be here after doing all of that to you is unbelievable. He has no shame at all.

“I’m quitting my job.”

He scoffed, “Really?” he laughed with no humor. He still scares you, but you need to be brave. You have to.

“Do you think another hospital will accept you if I spread rumor about you?” he slid his hand inside his pocket and tilts his head with a cocky smile.

You clenched your jaw and stared at him with so much hatred. He is powerful and wealthy. You knew he can ruin your life in a snap, mainly why you’re also too afraid to leave this place.

“You can’t do anything about it, y/n.” he smirks wickedly.

A tear fell from your eyes then it moves over to look at the unfamiliar person who suddenly walks inside. Your brows furrowed in confusion and so does Mr. Cha.

“But I can.” Sunghoon’s familiar voice made you roam your eyes around and you almost lost your balance when you saw him walking inside.

“What...” Mr. Cha is as confused as you are.

“Mr. Cha Jin we are asking you to come with us for interrogation about a case of harassment and rape.” a guy held him by his shoulder firmly and the other put his wrists together.

Sunghoon walks towards you and cupped your face, making you burst into tears even more.

“I’m sorry for being late, baby.” he mumbles and you just shook your head side to side.

“You’re just in time.”

He smiles and leaned down to give you a sweet kiss on your lips. He pulled away and both of you looked over Mr. Cha as he kept on resisting from the people whose guiding him outside.

“You can’t do this! You have no enough proof!” he said enraged and his eyes darted at your direction.

“Tell them, y/n! Tell them I am innocent! Do something! Defend your director!”

You can’t believe how he can say all those words towards you when he knew very well how guilty he is. Sunghoon tugs you closer, trapping your body using one of his arm.

He throw an envelope near Mr. Cha and his eyes dropped down to look at it.

“That’s her resignation letter.” Sunghoon said seriously.

Mr. Cha doesn’t look so happy about it and with gritted teeth he looked at the two of you.

“You can’t do this! You know what I can do to you, y/n!” he kept threatening you.

Sunghoon scoffed and tilts his head before placing a kiss on your forehead while still eyeing Mr. Cha. No fear can be seen over your boyfriend’s eyes.

“You messed with the wrong girl.”

He signalled the authorities to take him away already and you nuzzle over his chest as the commotion unfold. You have nothing in mind, but the thought of things being over.

“Wait.” you said when it finally hits you.

“Are you done with your therapy?” you looked at him with worried eyes.

Sunghoon smiled a little, “Not yet.”

“Then why are you here? You should be—” your words got cut off when he leans in and drop a kiss at your lips.

“I am here because my girlfriend needs me. I am a fool to leave you here alone that day.” guilt flashes through his eyes and you’re quick to comfort him.

“Don’t say that. The important thing is that you are here now.” and you wrapped your arms around his waist for a tight hug.

You two stayed that way before you decided to go home.

“Wait.” Sunghoon says and tugs your arm to pull you back.

Your body crashes on his and he looked at you with those hot eyes. With a little suspicion you stared at him.

“W-What?”

He smirked as one of his hand slowly moves down your thighs. You blushed and roamed your eyes around to check if somebody is there.

“Let me fuck you here in your office one last time.” he whispered sexily as he swiftly switch your positions and pushed you over your office table.

“But what if someone sees us?”

He pushed your skirt up to reveal your underwear. Sunghoon curses at how hot you looked beneath him before he licked his lip.

“Then they will enjoy the show.” and with a big grin, he pushed your undies to the side then pulled out his erect cock.

He gave his palm a lick before aligning his hardened head on your wet core. You let out a small moan at the sensation of his dick touching your entrance.

“Nobody,” he grunts as he pushed it inside with no mercy making you yelped a little. “can every taste you this way. This is all mine. Mine.” he said firmly like a law nobody can disobey.

He started thrusting from behind you and you two are both a moaning mess. He made his hand roam your sexy back before reaching your hand to intertwin your fingers.

“I love you so much, baby.”

Your mouth hanged open, saliva dripping slightly out from it from too much pleasure as your boyfriend kept hitting the right spots.

“I l-love you, Hoon.”

“You look lovely.” he doesn’t even need to utter those words towards you as his eyes are enough for you to know it.

The way Sunghoon stares at you with so much love and affection will always be your favorite thing. His thick brows making a straight line whenever he looks at you indicates how his worries disappears. His sexy eyes never leaving you and his lips lifting for a smile shows how badly smitten he is for you.

You smiled and leaned closer for one kiss as you don’t want your gloss to be smeared all over him if it was a long kiss. He tried to chaste after, not satisfied with the short affection. You’re quick to dismiss his attempt for another kiss.

“Later.”

“Later?”

You giggled, “Yes, later.”

He nods and placed a kiss at your shoulder before the two of you walks inside the venue. Tonight, his team gathered everyone for a small dinner party to welcome him back. His other team-mates and his coach are pretty much excited to have him back.

Of course, he asked you to be there. He wants you to be there for him.

“There he is! My man!” their coach cheers and eagerly approached Sunghoon as you two made an entrance.

His teammates didn’t waste time to come and greet him as well, delighted to see him around. You didn’t fail to catch their attention too as they kept eyeing you after greeting Hoon.

Your eyes catch a glimpse of his ex-girlfriend with Sunghoon’s ex best friend. They both stood from a distance unlike everybody else. She looked a little sad and whole regretful as she stare at your direction.

She couldn’t help but reminisce the times that it was her who he was holding.

“This is Doctor y/n (surname), my girlfriend.” he announced sounding so proud.

They all looked amused and even bickered around who can shake your hand first. You giggled finding it adorable and funny.

“You two look good together.” your heads whipped over to the side when two people approaches.

The taunting lingers over his tone as he smirks over Sunghoon, eyes flickering slight anger and disapproval to your boyfriend’s presence. Natasha stood close to him, her body language shows how uncomfy she is and how she refused to be in that situation.

A part of you felt bad for her, but you also know she kind of deserves it after what she did to Sunghoon.

Sunghoon didn’t show any sign of annoyance through his face, but instead pulled you closer to his side.

“Thanks. I can say the same thing to the two of you.” Sunghoon said with a playful smirk on his face as he stated those words with a meaningful tone.

Natasha looked so bothered about it and so does his best friend. He tries to hide it with a humorless laugh and clicked the side of his cheeks.

“Don’t you feel sorry for suddenly showing up like nothing happened?” he fired that made Sunghoon's smile fell.

His smirk grew wider at the reaction Sunghoon showed. He seems to be enjoying it and you hate it. So even before he can utter another word, you stepped in.

“Yes, my boyfriend does feel sorry.” you interrupted with a sweet voice and a playful expression on your face.

Everyone eyed you as you looked straight at his ex best friend’s face.

“The only thing he felt sorry about is that he left the team on your care.” you said that earned reactions from their teammates.

You pursed your lips into a pout, like you feel sorry. Like you feel so much pity.

“You didn’t even made it to the top five, right? What a shame.” you teased that clearly hit the spot as his smirk fell completely.

Sunghoon grinned and licked his lip before tilting his head over to the side, very impressed.

“But don’t worry guys. Sunghoon’s back to win you another trophy this season. I know he won’t disappoint us.” and you flash them all a very sweet smile.

And he really didn’t disappoint.

“For first place, champion for this season.” the announcer voice echoes to the whole place while you looked above during the podium ceremony.

Your eyes goes teary just watching Sunghoon smiling so widely while looking straight at you. His mother held your arm beside and got her widest smiles as well.

“Park Sunghoon!” everyone cheered so loudly after his name was called.

You screamed and clapped, admiring how he really shines. This is where he truly belongs, his natural habitat. He is meant for this. You pursed your lips, trying to hold back your tears.

He kissed the trophy while still looking straight to you. He mouthed ‘I love you’ and you responded, ‘I love you.’

Your heart races as the crowd cheers loudly for Park Sunghoon, the famouse ace racer of the team (f1 team) and also your boyfriend.

tag-list:

@candewlsy @nyfwyeonjun @sunghoonizz @jaehyuniewifeu @imjakes-wifeofc1 @deobitifull @enhypens-hoe @yzzyhee @nyxtwixx @crimnalseung @vixensss @jjklvr9 @gonorrheaisme @lhspeachie @myboyfriendjungkook @capri-cuntz @brooklyninawhitemustang @woniebae @ma-riiii @tinie03 @seokseokjinkim @iheartjayke @hybeboyenthusisast @minniejenseo @shelovsme @sjakewrld @shawnyle @skzenhalove @crimnalseung @cloud-lyy @vixialuvs @mitmit01 @mintdsunoo @metkayinassss @dojaejunging @ahnneyong @denleave1088 @velvetkisscs @saanvilovessunghoon @ilymarkchan @realrintaro @acolytees @tanisha2060 @stuckonclouds @outroherrr @yunhoswrldddd @smpfrpshlhs @missychief1404 @riyuukii @jungwonieee

[aquato-family-circus]

There's a lot of interesting and warrented discussion about how Raz plays psychiatrist to a bunch of older folks he really shouldnt need to be helping. Like it's sort of crazy for a kid his age to be handling all that responsiblity, especially for how well he does it too.

But like, I also think it's interesting to consider that MOST of the people in his life don't actually encourage this behavior directly, Raz is the disruptor of the status quo. Raz can NOT be stopped from doing this it's his enrichment. Augustus lets him leave at the end of the first game because he's narratively proven himself as a hero and psychonaut and I have thoughts about how he did that without talking to Donatella first. but I Like To Think he also trusted Sasha & Milla to look after them. In the way the story is framed I think that's fine. Augustus is a responsible parent he couldn't have known the plane would crash.

I wonder what the mission would've looked like if the plane hadn't crashed in the Rhombus. I imagine Sasha & Milla probably would've taken the lead on things while allowing Raz and Lili there because Raz proved he's capable and it's Lili's dad I don't think they could physically stop her from helping.

Meanwhile Ford and Gristol over here at the only ones who ever like directly encourage the behavior of getting directly involved and jumping into minds to fix problems.

Ford I'm not entirely mad at bc for his part he's physically unable to help in the first game, and in the second game he's running on a ticking clock. So I can give a little bit of grace for him relying on A Child to do everything.

But then Gristol is just a little pathetic man who was already trying to see if he could manipulate Lili before Raz came along and he was like oh this is even better, this kid doesn't know me/Truman well AND he worships the ground the Psychonauts walk on.

Like do you follow me do you understand my vibe. The Psychonauts are stil kinda wildin when it comes to child endangerment but it's a sliding scale where some are more responsible than others lol

I feel like Hollis and Truman are going to get the reports about Raz's Exciting First Week and look at each other like "oh ok. a mole in the psychonauts is maybe the first issue to address among many."

[mentallhealthmatters]

Probably late but... (Long rant ahead)

https://www.tumblr.com/mentallhealthmatters/766237584051552256/like-fuck-you-shelby-this-guy-had-a-buuunch-of

“This is a 'I don't trust you guys, you weren't my friends,' move. This is 'you guys supported her, even quietly,' this is 'yeah no one fucking talked to him to hear his side of the story' move.”

Oh I have my thoughts and opinions on this and of people wishing or hoping that Wilbur still has friends or is still friends with those that used to be on that friend list. (the MCYT/Streamer Sphere) They are just setting themselves up for nothing but disappointment.

It wouldn't surprise me if everyone from the MC community - even those closest to him - abandoned him, in fact, I'm expecting it. Tommy private/unlisted his Wilbur Return “If I annoy Wil” VOD and even one or more of his YouTube videos that featured Wilbur (Like the Sims one). Philza unfollowed him everywhere, removed everything from his Twitch that even hinted at Wilbur, and he might be modding for Shelby (not 100% sure about that). Hell, he also probably got rid of some videos on his YouTube channel. Molly (Tommy's girlfriend) streamed with Lexie. (I think this was after the allegations) And isn't Lexie an ableist, claiming to be a victim of narcissistic abuse, which I hope she is able to heal but claiming all those with NPD are inherently corrupt or abusers because of a disorder they didn't ask for is just wrong. 

Sidenote/Mini-Rant: Saying "People with NPD will never get better because they lie to their therapists.” Is just so toxic and ableist in my opinion. 1) While NPD can’t be cured, it can be treated, and saying those with NPD will never get better discourages them from seeking those treatments. 2) Only a medical professional, psychiatrist, psychologist, or an expert on NPD can make a diagnosis, not Twitch streamers. 3) NPD and other similar disorders are extremely stigmatized and doing this is just going to make it harder for people with those disorders.

Not to mention all the ones who jumped on the hate bandwagon to throw in their two cents or those who just bashed him, Minx and Billzo for example jumping on the bandwagon: Minx was at a party at his house, saw him and Shelby(?) arguing, tried to insert herself - got denied - then later when Wilbur was heading to the bathroom because he drank too much. She followed him into the bathroom to hold his hair back (never mind that his hair is too short to be held back) Wilbur being drunk, assumed she was trying to harm him, got angry at her, and told her to leave, calmed down, and apologize and said she didn't have to leave, yet she chose to leave anyway. But according to Minx, he’s still somehow the bad guy because he got angry thinking she was trying to hurt him while drunk, she isn't a victim of anything. Billzo handcuffed Wilbur without his consent or permission to a railing(?) as a joke and threw the keys away. Then Wilbur tells or asks him to let him go making it very clear that he didn’t want this nor find the "joke" funny, only for Billzo to inform him that they don’t have the keys and set the cuffs to the tightest setting while Wil’s panicking. So of course this makes Wil panic more til he yells at Bill to find the keys. And somehow people are making Wilbur the bad guy because he yelled, while Bill was the one who restrained him, put the cuffs as tightly as possible, and laughed at him. Wilbur had every right to yell at him! (I would have) And Wilbur apologized to Bill for yelling at him!

And the others, many of whom admitted themselves that they weren't close to or knew Wilbur all that well like Aimsey, Tubbo, Harry, and Max (Didn’t Will need to be reminded by Tommy who Max was at one point?) all of which were very fast to condemn and attack Wilbur but when Beau came out about her story about being kissed without consent (might be more to that) by Snikrep, someone a majority of them hang out with, suddenly they're distancing and excusing themselves. Didn’t Aimsey make a statement on Twt saying she didn’t associate with the guy, only for a recent photo to drop that had both of them hanging out together in it, and then she deleted her statement on Twitter? Weren't Harry or Max (or both) caught on a previous stream where they were making fun/jokes about Beau and her story/situation? Isn't Harry friends with KitWisp and Snikrep who have also been accused of domestic abuse and sexual assault? I’m unaware if anything happened to them. (I think Snikrep is still editing for Tommy) It shows how performative and self-centered their activism and support for victims is. (Correct me if any of the above info is wrong or if you have more to add. I'm recalling all this from memory.)

Hypocrites, they’re hypocrites. “With friends like these, who need enemies" is a saying for a reason. 

I highly doubt he will even glance in Minecraft’s direction or touch it with a 50-foot pole because of all those people previously mentioned, even if he still likes the game itself. 

Wilbur deserves better. Better friends and better people to spend his time with. He needs people who will help him improve, not drop him as soon as the public deems it or when it's not profitable. I believe that it’s best he's gotten rid of all his MCYT "friends" as well. If all of them were willing to use his downfall to boost their reputations and careers, then he's so much better without them. He has worth outside of them and deserves more than them as much as I miss his friendship and dynamic with them. (SBI my beloved)

Besides, Wilbur being in a niche-y band with a small music channel on the side suits him more than being a Minecraft content creator. I say this as someone who found him via his Minecraft content and enjoyed it more than his band. (I like his band/songs, I just enjoyed his content more)

Plus Wilbur's biting habit is fixable, it can be helped. It's not something he kept secret, everyone knew about his biting habit and knew it was something he had done for years. I know change can be challenging, and be a long, slow, and difficult process. But what matters is that he keeps trying! That looks to be what he’s trying to do, with his last post on Twt, with him going to therapy and changing his lifestyle a bit. It's hard to stop a long-term issue or habit that started in childhood, like his biting habit (Old habits die hard) but none of them seem willing to try and help him change or improve himself. You should at least try, you'll probably get kicked and scratched in the process but that's what friends do: try to help each other. (Keyword: TRY. Don't keep burning yourself at both ends of the candle for someone who is unwilling to change. But Wilbur seems to be trying/willing.)

Even if Wilbur and some of his old friends somehow reunite or reconnect sometime down the line, if they can make amends, and rebuild the bridges burnt, those bridges aren't going to be what they were previously. They could only - at most - look similar but never be the same.

Only bridge id encourage being rebuilt is Quackity. *fuck* everyone else. But thats less i care about wilbur and have deemed Quackity to be the only one worth redeeming, but Wilbur is a crucial key to things id like to see from Quackity in upcoming plots and plans, and shelby burned that bridge. The story can still be told, but a name would have been omitted and i rather it not be.

[deliriumbubbles]

After all the discourse about who was "more" wrong, It's exciting to see Apology Tour put the foot down and remind us that this is Blitzo's story. It's about how he changes and grows. It's not about just letting it go because we know he hates himself. You actually have to take steps toward improvement, and that's really fucking hard to do.

Are there psychiatrists in Hell? Cognative Behavioral Therapy?

So first off, anyone who was dying for Blitzo to be the one sending tons of text messages and coming back trying to talk to Stolas, congrats because he's definitely doing that. And annoying the crap out of Stolas and just hurting him more every time he talks to him because he keeps trying to make them revert their relationship BACK to "I'm just here as part of a transactional fucking." The big problem between them, that he can't believe that Stolas would like him even though Stolas has told him multiple times by now, remains because it's not something he can just hear once and get over.

Moreover, this is his story, so he's just going to say more hurtful things, but Stolas at least, this time, manages to use his own words (likely bc he's not triggered at that point and has some defenses up), and is able to tell Blitzo that his words are hurtful. Instead of magicking him out. Because Blitzo would just pop back over the wall.

So we get a brief, humorous montage of Blitzo going around and apologizing to everyone and not meaning it and he ends up at the Fuck Blitzo party and by degrees, and after Stolas singing a song that suggests that he still kind of blames himself for being foolish and thinking Blitzo cared, it does start to sink in and they talk a bit.

Interesting that this is the first time Blitzo has SEEN Stolas knocking it back because we the audience know he does this kinda regularly. Along with his own damn meds. Geez, these guys.

I also like that they didn't have to villainize Verosika in their conversation. She got hurt because it seems like their relationship was going pretty well until she let an ilu slip and that just sets Blitzo off because he can never believe that. It's like being compliment shy to a million degrees. And so he turned on her, he hurt her, on purpose, and she's angry because of what he did but also because he acts like it's her fault.

IS this party a monument to pettiness? Oh fuck yeah, it is. Maybe people should just learn to let go. I dont' think that's her entire career, but now whenever they're near each other, they both snipe at each other because she was hurt and doesn't feel like forgiving him when he's not sorry. But it was a good conversation between them. Blitzo hit another milestone, admitting out loud that he doesn't want to have to be like this forever. He does it deliberately, and it doesn't excuse it, but he's seeking change. He had to get here before moving forward.

So. Now he's had "a fucking minute" to process what Stolas said, has said, keeps on saying. He's heard that Stolas craves someone to love and want him. It's out there that Blitzo stopped Striker the first time. Unspoken things are moving forward.

I heard people fussing about this being their make up episode, but given the next ep (which probably will be in October), Blitzo needs to be at a low before he starts turning things around. It's his show and more than anything, the arc with Stolas is highlighting how he can't accept good things happening to him.

Stolas still has things he needs to work on as well. Highlighted in this episode is getting a more realistic sense of what romance is kind of like because he's basically a babygay rn. He doesn't have to have another full on relationship to realize that other people could want him. It could happen, but it's not necessary. He just has to recognize that he's not unlovable. That's not the problem with Blitzo. And for him to heal from his father and Stella he does need a little more experience.

Headcanon for me: Stolas and Verosika are gonna be besties after this until I'm proven otherwise.

[crowleysgirl67]

New Neighbor

Author: @crowleysgirl67

Word Count: 1239

Parings/Characters: Spencer Reid x Reader

Warnings: fluff, angsty, reid getting injured,   

A/N: Thanks for reading! 

Arms leadened with groceries you struggled to get your key in your apartment door. You let out an exasperated sigh as one of the bags toppled over and onto the floor. Setting the bags down you aggressively opened the door and picked up a few bags again and took them inside. When you came back for the rest a moppy brown-haired gentleman was bagging the things you'd dropped. 

“Oh you don’t need to do that, I could have gotten it.” you bent down to help him.

He smiled, “It’s no problem. I’m Spencer.”

“(Y/N). It’s nice to meet you Spencer. Thank you for your help.”  

“My pleasure. You’re new to the building aren’t you?” he asked, following you in with your groceries. 

“Yeah I moved in on Thursday.”   

“Makes sense why I haven’t seen you yet. I just got back into town from work last night.” he set your bags on the counter. 

“You travel a lot for work?” you ask as you begin to put things away.

“Quite a bit. Honestly I’m probably out for work more than I am home.” 

“As long as you enjoy what you do, I don’t think that’s necessarily a bad thing.”  

“It can be grueling, but I do enjoy it.” 

“Then that’s what matters.”

“What about you? Do you enjoy your work?” he asked, looking about your living room.

 “I do. I have freedom to do what I want to.��� you finished putting the last of the groceries away and put on a kettle for tea. You pulled out your tray of different teas and offered it to Spencer to look through. 

“I noticed your doctorates on the wall.” he commented as he looked.

“Yeah. I am a psychiatrist.” you pulled two mugs out from the cupboard. “I also write, which is my main ‘job’. Most of my books are done under a pen name unless I’m writing about the psych field.” you add seeing as he looked confused about how you’d have free time as a doctor. 

“You don’t practice?” he questioned.

“Not really, not anymore at least. I keep up on my credentials and I help occasionally at the local hospitals if needed.” 

The kettle squealed and you pulled it off pouring the water into the mugs. 

“Do you mind if I ask why?” He took the mug you scooted over and put his tea in it.

“Not at all. I was attacked by a patient who had severe delusions. As a result I decided to take a step back from that.” 

“Makes sense.” he nods.

“I’m no cop, that's for sure.” you slid over the sugar.

“Making an educated guess about my profession I see. It’s close. I’m an FBI agent” he chuckled.

“Where the travel part comes in.”

“Exactly.” 

***

Over the next few months you and Spencer became close friends. He even had you apartment sit while he was out of town on cases. You didn’t mind and enjoyed his company when you had the opportunity to hang out.

One evening your cell rang and you answered thinking it might be Spencer.

“Is this (Y/N)?” a female voice on the other end asked.

“Depends, who are you?” you asked wary of unknown callers.

“My name’s Penelope Garcia. I’m the BAU technical analyst, I work with Dr. Reid.”

“Oh, Spencers told me a lot about you guys. It’s nice to put a voice to a name. What can I help you with?”

“He asked me to give you a call. He’s a little out of it.”

“Why? What happened?” you stood up from your spot on your couch, on alert. 

“He was injured in the field, nothing life threatening thankfully”

“What happened?” you asked, gathering your stuff into an overnight bag.

“He was shot in the shoulder.” she replies with a quiet voice.

“Where is he? What hospital? What city? I can be there within a matter of hours.”

Garcia and you worked out the details and you gathered what you needed for an overnighter or two and went to his apartment and gathered a few things for him as well. As promised you were there in a matter of hours.

“(Y/N)?” a dark haired man approached you as you entered the floor Spencer was on.

“Agent Hotchner I presume. Penelope said you and your team would be here.” you shook his hand. 

“Correct. It’s a pleasure to meet you, despite the circumstances.” he brings you over to the rest of the team and introduces you.

“You got here fast.” Rossi comments.

“The perks of having money is you pay people to make it happen fast.” you chuckled softly. “How is he?”

“Alright. He’s asleep now.” Derek answered.

“Was it a through and through?”  

“Yes.” Derek replied.

“I’m here!” Penelope's voice drifted down the hall as she approached. 

“Baby girl, what are you doing here?” Derek asks. Everyone looked surprised to see her as well.

“(Y/N) brought me. Did you know she has her own private jet? Like the one we use is cool but hers is fabulous.”   

“She said your case was over. I figured it didn’t hurt to bring her if I was coming anyway.” you shrug off the looks they were giving you.

“Oh we so have to see it later.” Emily pipes in. 

“Hey guys.” Spencer says and everyone turns to face him.

“You should be resting. Why are you up?” you made your way to his side and guided him into one of the chairs. 

“I’m fine.” 

“You wouldn’t be in a hospital hooked up to an IV with a hole in your shoulder if you were fine Spence.” you flagged down a nurse “Could you get me a wheelchair and Dr. Reid's chart please.” 

She glanced at you, noticing the hospital badge, before nodding, “Of course Doctor.” 

“Thank you.” you smiled and turned your attention back to Spencer.

“I don’t need a wheelchair. I walked out here didn’t I?” he pouts. “Garcia? When did you get here?” he asked as he seemed to just notice her.

“And that’s why you need the chair.” you thank the nurse as you took his file, and parked the chair next to him.

***

Spencer was on modified duty for the weeks following the incident. You were there helping him. You took up making sure he did his physical therapy exercises, and cooking the two of you sharing meals at one of your apartments frequently. His friends checked in on him regularly, giving you the opportunity to get to know them better as well. 

“Hey (Y/N).” Spencer greeted you as he walked in your apartment using his key.

“Hey Spence. How was work? You didn’t over extend that shoulder today right?” you looked over from your spot on the couch. He’d done that once early on and could have potentially messed his recovery up. 

“It was fine and no I didn’t overdo it. Emily was right, you're not letting that go anytime soon are you?” he chuckled. 

“Damn right I’m not. You got hurt, you need to heal and rest, not be off messing your shoulder up more.”

“Hey!” he plopped down next to you on the couch. 

“Genius can’t rebuttal because I’m right.” you teased. 

“Um..” he started.

“Yes?” you waited patiently for him to form his thoughts.

“Do you maybe… want to go out… with me?” he asked nervously. 

You smiled, “Yes Spencer, I would love to go out with you.”

[holocene-sims]

next // previous

september 1, 2021 5:00 p.m. newcrest hospital

[five hours later]

[dr. winters] so, you’re an interesting case.

[grant] don’t i know it?

[dr. winters] fortunately, the excellent news here is that your physical exam is overall outstanding.

[dr. winters] all your blood work and vitals are great, your eyesight’s correctable to normal, and you have no other underlying disease besides the autoimmune stuff.

[dr. winters] disclaimer that you should lay off the cigarettes, but...

[dr. winters] still, based on these factors, i see no real reason to deny your medical on physical grounds. the MRI of your spine was very concerning, but i did read the letter from your rheumatologist clearing you for work again, and you passed all my exams just fine, so it’s not an issue in my eyes unless your disease and/or functioning significantly worsen.

[grant] well, that’s...good?

[dr. winters] not so fast. don't get too excited. as much as i'd like to send you out with your medical today, i can’t.

[grant] alright. fair enough.

[dr. winters] i'm not denying you, to be clear. i'm deferring your case to federal administration.

[dr. winters] this is the unfortunate part. because you suddenly admitted to having previous substance abuse issues, have brand new mental health diagnoses, and are on some medications that are neither approved nor banned, it’s out of my hands.

[dr. winters] you would need a special issuance medical, which is only something the administration can give out.

[dr. winters] if you’re granted one, it is a full first-class medical and will clear you to fly and hopefully approve your current medications with no issues, but it will tag you as having health conditions, and it’ll probably place restrictions on your medical, like more frequent medical exams and no flying if you’re having x, y, and z symptoms.

[grant] okay, sure. what should i do next?

[dr. winters] well, i'll forward all the paperwork from you to them along with my reports from today. at some point, the administration will send you a whole bunch more paperwork in the mail, and they’ll ask you to explain all your medications, your psychiatric history, and why the hell you were diagnosed with multiple psychiatric disorders all at once and so late in life.

[dr. winters] whatever you say, be as honest as possible. i will gently remind you that lying to them is a felony.

[dr. winters] you’ll mail all your responses back to them, and then they’ll tell you to submit to a neurocognitive screen and a psychiatric evaluation. i can go ahead and refer you to doctors who can offer you those screenings. they'll also want statements from any psychiatrists and therapists you've seen basically confirming they think you're stable enough for this kind of employment.

[dr. winters] and finally, after they review all the new materials plus your flight records, you’ll either get approved or denied.

[grant] there's some hope?

[dr. winters] yes. you have held a medical before. you'll just have to jump through more hoops this time to prove your capabilities. worst case scenario you lawyer up and sue until you get results. and no, i'm not joking. in complex cases like yours, i often recommend a lawyer.

[grant] i don’t want a lawyer.

[dr. winters] at least not yet. don't count the legal route out. the worst worst case scenario is that you're denied. if they deny you and you feel that's unfair, the law is the only solution you have left.

[grant] got it. well, um, thanks for all your help. i guess i'll wait for new paperwork from the administration then. how long should the whole process to take, assuming it all goes smoothly?

[dr. winters] oh, it won't go smoothly. your case will sit on someone’s desk until the file rots or the sun blows up, whichever comes first, unless you call incessantly. so, do that. call, call, and call again until someone does something with it.

[dr. winters] and maybe you’ll get a final decision in...

[dr. winters] six months? a year? hopefully not longer than that.

[darkbluekies]

Hello there! It's good to be back, didn't expect to be gone for like I think two whole weeks or three but oh well and hmm! Let's see if you're right about that! I love him a lot and he is, in fact my darling but I do have a trait in me that he would dislike (greatly, even.)

Silas:

Male Yandere characters [most to least]

Pros — Obedient ((just like you, I'm also terrified.)) a introvert and likes to be in my room 24/7 .. would enjoy being in his house more if provided an art room, also I hate being in pain too and I think I'd have a heart attack if I ever tried to escape.

Cons — I have anger issues and get overwhelmed easily+ other mental health problems like my BPD, I might split on him [ a term where people with BPD can only see white ((good)) or black ((bad)) and not in the grayish area or the in-between of good and bad.)) and that probably might anger him and be sent to the basement ☠️ and I hate pain so much so I'd probably get a mental breakdown and start cursing at him —

Dr Kry: ((suprised he's second?? Unless..))

Pros — I have a lot of similarities with him > loves cooking, gardening, light exercise, reading books and because he's a doctor and my dream job is to be a psychiatrist, I would probably rant to him about the things I've studied and accomplished with my major.

Cons — unless he's giving my break a body and be able to do house chores for some entertainment and stimulation, I am extremely defiant and I don't like really like someone treating me like a hopeless, dumb doll. I don't consider myself smart but I don't wanna be treated like I'm some dumb guy 😭 I'd only love him truly if he doesn't continue poisoning me and treating me like a naive, hopeless doll.

Would still love him, from afar that is, anyone being his darling and being defiant, just goodluck to y'all 😭

King Edmund: [ platonic ]

Pros — you mentioned her shows more of his human side and is less yandere-ish with male readers, I suppose that's the con, interested in his kingdoms history and I guess... We could possibly be friends?? However,

Cons — I am terrified of him. I don't know if it's any different with male readers but if he ends up killing someone because of me, I would consider my friendship with him. I do not wanna be friends with an unstable guy 😭

If he doesn't, well.. when he gets a wife, I'll probably guide him with his relationship and if that gets me killed, could be the best ending because would he even let go of a male reader??😭 Unsure, I don't really read his stories as often as the other male characters

Female characters [ most to least , also platonic since I'm attracted to men. ]

Hedwig:

Pros — I feel like I'd be the safest with her out of all yanderes, I would love being spoiled by her ((I'll likely get uncomfortable at first but would get used to it.)) and having a friend around with me

Cons — my social battery tends to drain easily and with how clingy she is, it'll drain me more. I also hate prioritizing other people when my social battery is this low unless it's urgent/important (like me being concerned for a friend or so due to several reasons like mental health or my job.) so if I was forced to put my attention towards her, I would get really annoyed and be a bit more forward.

Jerry:

Cons — ...I don't think there's any pros for me, in fact, she's the one I actually fear the most. I wonder if she'd treat me differently if she knows I'm trans, as in ftm, like treating me softer compared to cis guys because I understand being a woman is hard.. especially the periods, god. Her aggressive humors scares me, a lot and if she shows me what she does while working, I wouldn't take it well and disassociate and if I were to form some unhealthy attachment with her or at least a bond, my BPD would get triggered due to how she shows her love and I would split on her 24/7 thinking she hates me and wants me dead.

Well, that took quite the time to write. Let me know if you need more information on BPD, I don't think I wrote it well, it's... 4 am for me and my eyes are as dry as the sahara dessert. I need to use my glasses more when I'm not going out somewhere.

—🌊

I am surprised that he is second not going to lie lmao, i really thought that he would be your number one!

it's so interesting to read and see how different people fit the different yanderes since Y/N is more of their own character rather than ourselves haha, it puts things in another perspective! I liked to read this <3333

Edmund isn't less yandere with men, just in a friend way. Like "you are my friend only I will not share you with anyone else, you can only have me as your best friend" and will not accept his best friend spending time with anyone but him, wanting Edmund to be his only friend, kind of thing. He is just as controlling, just as entitled. Be sure that Edmund wouldn't kill any darling, platonic or romantic! You will stay with him until the end of time because you are the only one that knows his real side :D

As for Jerry, I can say that she is the number one OC when it comes to trans/nonbinary etc things. She is the least judging, most understanding. She would most likely treat you like she treats all guys so be prepared for some sudden playfights :D

[deepdive002]

You have a very wholesome energy on this blog.

Very proud of your resilience, I have multiple family members who struggle with bipolar disorder including my brother and he has unfortunately become very estranged, in and out of jail, difficult to be around if not harmful at times and refuses to seek help or medicate despite all the help and rehab over the years. Sometimes it feels very hopeless and sad, especially the fear that I might have those symptoms too one day, but I am grateful and soothed that there are stories of hope and healing and positivity like yours.

Wishing the best for you and your daughter! 💗

Thanks! 🩷

My bipolar has put me in the hospital 10 times. For better or worse I seem to only get manic episodes. This is tricky because being manic actually feels great. The problem is that you don't get anything done.

Untreated mania would have made getting through college or holding down a job relatively impossible. (It's still very hard, even with treatment.)

The key for me was finding help I liked and respected early in my life.

Drawing the line between where I stop and my insanity starts was a very personal question. I believe an objective scientific definition is best, but the answer may be different for others.

When I talk about my illness, I include a personal request: I ask that if people think I'm acting strangely to go online and look up the latest criteria for a Bipolar I Disorder Manic Episode in the DSM.

(As of the DSM-5, there are 7 symptoms and having 3 or 4 for a week is the threshold for a manic episode.)

If I need help, get me help but otherwise: I need to be allowed to get excited about my life without my friends and family worrying "Oh no! It's happening again."

Resources ☎️

I've been seeing my therapist for about 20 years now.

If you are interested you can probably find him by Googling "Harold L. Boerlin MD, Irvine CA". He's been doing phone visits since COVID.

He may be able to help you even if you don't live in California, if you are willing to fly out for some initial consultations. I actually have no idea how that would work but I can't recommend him enough.

Dr. B is both a psychologist and a psychiatrist. (He has a medical degree from Harvard.)

Letting someone change you fundamentally with medication is a big ask. However had I not decided this is what I want all those years ago, I would probably be homeless and perhaps have very strained relationships with friends and family today. (My family is also amazing by the way.)

Political Advocacy 🇺🇸📢

In my opinion, the mental health care system in the US is on the brink of collapse.

Too many professionals are not trained in hard science and some are handing out diagnosis like candy.

Recent "Mandated Reporter" laws are vague, ineffective and shatter the essential sacred trust between a client and a therapist.

Mental health parity laws for insurance companies do not work and I strongly advocate for MH to be a seperate insurance the way dental and vision are (with well-funded public assistance programs.)

While in the hospital I've seen human beings get "processed" and it is horrific.

I am in awe of the limitless compassion of most whitecoats (my name for them). However, publicly available resources are often not as unlimited.

Sick patients come in on a 5150 for a 3-day hold, yelling and hitting people. They get some food and shelter for a bit but refuse further help.

Then sometimes doctors fall short. They give up and just give the patient a heavy sedative so they will stop yelling and hitting people.

Then the patient doesn't voluntarily extend to 14 day treatment. They get tossed out on the street like garbage and the cycle repeats.

[rivangel]

me realizing i want (need) a complete metoidioplasty or i will feel this way forever:

i am slowly going insane which i know is mainly cuz im in a precarious part of this process rn but,

i’ve secured 2 letters that i need, but everything is riding on one from my (inexperienced) psychiatrist - and it’s not even that i think she’s transphobic (she even knows a few things) but there’s the Possibility that she’ll say no and THEN what will i do?? i don’t fucking know!! the disappointment would fucking crush me.

the anxiety the past few days has been PARALYZING too, even tho i know perfectly well that labor day was yesterday, so at most she’s had just today to think about it. it’s like no matter how logical i can be, i just CAN’T stop worrying. i can’t imagine picking out a different surgeon bc there’s just no better one in the US from all my research.

IDK if that realization is bad, it was going to be the same price no matter what, but i was sooooooooo sure about what i wanted. then i did this Small thing that gave me the very rare complete awareness of my body, thought about it, and all the sudden i was COMPLETELY sure that i want a full metoidioplasty with nothing left out.

i think part of it is, over the years i’ve intrinsically/unknowingly trained my brain to block out distress over my body bc when i let myself feel my feelings, i get messed up lmaoo.

obviously i’m not an idiot and i’m MORE than perfectly aware of the decision i’m making. ‘top surgery is permanent’ is a HAIRCUT compared to bottom surgery in any capacity. so i have been thinking about it constantly ever since (or i can’t stop) (which is probably fueling my anxiety), and when i imagine it, i get this weird happy-exhilaration that ends stifled. the idea of being that way, the possibility that i’m going to be, but then the reality that i’m not, plus the rest of the hurdles that exist to overcome. even just typing this out is so disorienting to me emotionally.

also, just like with my top surgery, now that i’m working towards the goal of getting the change, i’m so much more aware of how wrong i feel in my body. idk if it’s internalized transphobia, but i hate this feeling and i hate that I’m like this.

but also (lastly) i feel kind of guilty for being so fucked up over this. cuz oh my god it could be (and also was) SO much worse before i started. idk the proportion of trans people that want masculinizing bottom surgery, but i can’t imagine not being able to medically transition and stay sane. maybe that’s mainly just me

dumb addition, i hate that transphobia is my worst trigger. transphobes fuck off from my blog pls

i also hate the political climate in america surrounding it. i can guarantee the vast majority of transphobic people just don’t understand it and don’t seek to, and that’s the worst part. it’s not like there’s some kind of blockage of information - we have the fucking internet ffs. it’s the struggle of human beings just like themselves, but they don’t want to understand trans feelings at all.

for me, i don’t want to stand out or be treated like im special. i just want to be identified the way i should be identified

[halt-kun]

Jujutsu Kaisen 268 - Finale

SO SUKUNA DEAD

I HOPE

Urgh, stop tormenting my child

he's depressed, he doesn't need a demon doing that on top

Oh no baby, you can try though, but see a psychiatrist because living for someone else won't hold

He's BACK

!!!!!

YESSSSSSSS

Did he dodge ? Or was he just punched that hard ?

So they split up but Sukuna is still some kind of beast, probably will go crazy then if it doesn't hold his souls, or maybe just disappear

Envy vs Mustang vibes

don't make the mistake he did, also Sukuna is a bigger problem than Envy

well both helped plan some form of ethnic cleansing

Mahitovibes ?

He'll definitely say no

he has some pride

Yuji is such a nice kid, I understand why Megumi wants to live for you

Well I'm not going to hold you back, leave,

bye bye

Sukuna

Uraume is just saying once again, if it was a 1000 years ago he would have won, it's true he was missing one finger

They are wearing a binder too

Sukuna simp

could not be me

Of course luck is on Hakari's side

well bye bye Uraume, I wish we'd seen more of you than just a Sukuna simp

Oh my god, it's the box when Yuji died

WE SAID

NO DEAD FRIEND COMING BACK TO LIFE SURPRISE

I MISSED HER

they did

inside or alone maybe ?

YUJI CRIED JUST A BIT

HE LYING

We all know he was crying so much happy tears he ruined the couch

not the same way JD VANCE did thankfully

I guess there are only two letters because he said what he wanted to to Yuji already

AH I KNEW.

but Nobaraaaaaaa... why don't you want to know about your mom ?

it's cute

I was hoping something more personal though Gojo

OMG, SOOOO CUTE

thank god everyone is alive

Megumi likes dark humor

he has depression too

HAHAHAHAHHA

HAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHA

I love Gojo

I'll miss you bro

OH SHIT

OKKOTSU NOOOO

Who's insulting him like that, not Maki, definitely not Toge, not Panda ? Ieri mabe ?

Well all is good, I'm happy about this chapter

it needs more hugs though

[lawliet-ryuzaki-ryuga]

Could i get hc's of L with a bipolar s/o?

Oh for sure you can!!! This is so interesting because lol I’m studying to be a psychologist so anything mental health related it up my ally! I’m going to be going based on what I’ve heard clients shared when I was shadowing a psychiatrist.

on THAT NOTE! if anyone you or anyone that you know who might be struggling with BP always reach our for some help! You’re not alone! I’m always here also! just shoot me a message on here If you ever need to talk! Maybe one day when i get my license i can better help all of you! Free session on Tumblr just give me 3 more years! But till then I’ll try to hear you out and give the best advice that I can if you need it!

1-800-950-NAMI (6264) or info@nami.org if you have any questions about bipolar disorder or finding support and resources.

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lol how I imagine L just sitting by your bed, watching you. 

-Let’s be honest, L although he analyzes everything and every word, he’s also very oblivious to what’s he’s looking at or dealing with.

-With how heightened your emotions are it might be overwhelming internally for L to be honest. He Will probably try to ignore it.. He hasn’t been exposed to heightened emotions besides the emotions he feels which is mostly suppressed.

- Gives you side stares while tilting his head, waiting for you to say something. 

- That being said if your emotions of excitement/happiness are heightened he wouldn’t match it back much. But if you’re feeling down, he’ll eventually snap out of his “ ignoring phase” and do his best to find a way to ease you into comfort.

- “Uh are you alright Y/N? Do you think if I ask Watari to bring you sweets you’ll feel better?”

“ I don’t know L.”

“ I’ll ask him to bring in sweets and if you change your mind it will be there.”

“ Okay..”

* proceeds asking Watari to bring other sweets that you like until you finally pick something up.” 

- Will have cameras set up everywhere to keep an eye on you.

-if you have a history of self-harm, he will baby proof everything! To make sure you’re always okay.

- Might even go to the extent of having Watari helping you shave as he watches you because let’s be honest he has never shaved. 

-Poor boy knows all about every disorder in the books, but doesn’t know how to act.

“ Y/N i I think you’re having an episode, you were happy yesterday, and now you’re not up for anything.. should i call your doctor?”

“ L no I’m fine.”

“ But-”

“ L that’s not what bipolar is, manifestations last for days to months.”

“ oh”

-He doesn’t take care of himself but he’ll be sure your meds are taken on time.

“ Watari did she take her meds on time?

“ yes L”

“ Both Haldol and Vraylar”

“ Yes”

“ okay” * turns to his monitor and goes over footage to make sure you took the meds.*

-if at any point you’re having a manic episode L has a whole plan. You have a healthcare provider on call at all times, a room for yourself, have anything and everything he’s come to learn that you like, he will bring.

-Will walk to your room and sits down while you lay in bed if you’re going through a depressive episode, and just look at you. He knows you enjoy  his company but you also enjoy the silence. 

- “You look nice today”

“ well I don’t feel great, I don’t want to go out.”

“ It will do you Good Y/N.”

“ L stop it, i don’t want to go, I don’t want to go out.”

“ If you get to force me to go out sometimes, then i have the right to take you out.”

“ L it’s not the same, I physically and mentally can’t right now.”

“ I know Y/N/N but just a 5 minute walk to get you some sunlight.”

“ Can we get some Dirty boba while we walk?”

“ Of course, you deserve it.”

- When walking around, if ay any point you just want to go back and stay in your bed. L will turn both of you back to HQ. Will get you blankets to have in the office just so you can be around people and stay in current time and reality.

-L would have over a billion tabs open on his computer as he looks up every type of recent research available so he has a better understanding of the statistics. 

[rosedhall]

Thinking about Maya having intricate and close relationships with each of her ghosts, thinking about how all her living friends abandoned her.. that she can never touch, be with or genuinely know these people who want her safe because they're stuck in their own times and perpetually re-living through their deaths. She can't ever have something tangible.

Anyway, as such, here's some "Maya and the ghosts interpersonal relationships" headcanons:

Amy Bell. Maya immediately develops a soft spot for Amy, given that she was only aged ten at death, though she can provide little support and can never quite bring herself to explain to Amy that she's been dead for 30-odd-years whenever Amy excitedly tells her that she wants to be just like her when she's big, she does like to show her more of what the world has to offer. She plays video games with Amy excitedly directing her through them, completely stunned by the graphics. Loves to take her on walks and drives. Though it hurts her immensely that Amy doesn't seem to understand that only Maya can talk to her.

Doctor Bose. Bose and Maya also get off on a good foot, he's soft spoken, polite and (generally) the most emotionally intelligent ghost. I picture him being good at soothing her when she's distressed - psychiatrist and such - it starts the moment they meet, his warm, hollow self pressed against her flank trying to count her breaths as she clutches at her bleeding scalp. He wants nothing more than to tuck her under his sports jacket and chat aimlessly about her post-university prospects.

He resents her inability to cook well, tuts through the box if she has pesto pasta more than two nights in a row. Is far too invested in the gossip of her housemates and will trail them, flickering the lights if they touch Maya's food. He does not like them but tamps down any particularly scathing criticism for her peace of mind. Big old gossipy softie.

Harvey. Due to Harvey's actual chronic inability to have tact, he and Maya are not initially keen on each other. He's also incredibly old fashioned in his mannerisms and Maya has a deep distaste for being called "pet", "love" or "girl" (oh, what range a middle aged northern bloke has) and such their first interactions are pretty biting and unpleasant. Very snarky on Harvey's end.

However, they do eventually start to warm towards each other. Harvey begins to realise that Maya is a genuinely good, if nosey, person who's often left out by her peers due to her quirks. Maya realises Harvey is a deeply emotionally repressed man. They find comfort in being aware of these aspects. Harvey also decides he needs to be a protector of sorts, though he's stiff about it, Maya just likes winding him up, but knows he'd probably kill for her if he could.

Rosemary Hall. Much like with Harvey, Rose and Maya are not able to bond well initially. Rose holds herself at such a distance from potential connection, because the moment she stops playing aloof she gets hurt. And Maya doesn't understand why Rose is so cold with her. (Also, confronting the reality of Maya's experiences means that Rose will have to contend with the person Jimmy's become.) The parallels between them both are striking and as Maya becomes cognisant of that fact, the more she's able to wriggle her way into Rose's good books.

Once they settle in with each other more, Rose let's herself be a little more maternal; she'll constantly keep track of what Maya ought to be doing and remind her of it, she offers hangover remedies and insightful relationship advice. She wants to braid Maya's hair the way her mother did her own, but she's such an amorphous spirit that her fingers drift through the strands. Maya likes to listen to her go on about the hotel's glory days and watch shit soap operas together.

[theodoraflowerday]

heartstopper s3e2 live episode reaction

and it's gonna start to get so much worse I wanna bask on that final scene for a little longer

bro it took me one hour to watch a half hour episode

"shame mom had to pull out" honestly yeah it's such a shame I'm gonna miss Sarah so much this season

but also HELLO AUNT PEGGY CARTER

oh he wrote it down lmao me too charlie

OH. OH OKAY CHARLES

bro and by the end of this they're gonna be having sex idk how I'm gonna cope

tori's face.... she's always so worried about charlie I get her so much

oh my god

JANE STOP

TORI SPRING CHARLIE'S #1 DEFENDER

"can you please not undermine me like that in front of him" stop making her do your job then she's a *child*

I see julio's prob not gonna be in this season either lol bc that was his line not tori's

oh my god auntie diane didn't know (or at least not officially bc i know sarah was gushing over charlie)

bro and nick came out to her just like that....... my baby boy I'm so proud of him

"you know me" "I do" oh I BET y'all do

"I'll be good" "not too good tho" OOHHHHHH AYEEEEEEEEEE

I know in the comics they've only been dating for a year and I know they're probably at MOST late 20s but please can we have a nathan/youssef wedding in s4 (at least just a mention)

STOP DARCY'S GRANDMA IS SO WHOLESOME please don't be transphobic

not sahar saying she's unsurprised about imogen's high drama grade skfjdkfk y'all are gonna be the messiest gfs

oh darcy baby

ALL NINES??????

OXBRIDGE PREP GROUP AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA LETS FUCKIN GO TARA

"exams mean nothing" oh tori baby

omg nick did terrible at math he's so relatable I love him

oh wait he passed math. is it obvious I'm not english lmao

"NEVER IN DOUBT" oh uncle rick you'll always be famous

god please let charlie go to menorca with nick's family next year please

oh that's not great

NOT A SHIRTLESS SELFIE NICHOLAS YOU WHORE

oh isaac youll get used to this don't worry (yes worry)

OH HELLO JACK MADDOX

"you're abandoning me again" god every time tori speaks it tugs at my heartstrings

"I don't wanna see mum" and she accepts it.... greatest big sister in the world bro

oh char

CATCH PLANES NOT FEELINGS LMFAOOOOOOO IMOGEN I LOVE YOU

OH AUNTIE DIANE IS A PSYCHIATRIST LETS GOOOOOOO TEAM PSYCH

oh nick baby talk to her she's about the single most qualified person you could be talking about this to

oh I love you darcy's grandma you're so cute

darcy giving away her skirts..... or should I say THEIR SKIRTS. LET'S GO NB DARCY

oh tori

oh tori no

oh my god tori no

bro tori is breaking my heart CAN WE GET MICHAEL HERE WE NEED SUNSHINE

TAO NOOOOOOOOOO

"I wish I'd sat still" oh no

bro this show is gonna fuck me up

Isaac being worried about charlie 😭 also isaac being annoyed is SO ME I'd be smacking them left and right like wow

NOT ELLE COPYING TAO'S "RRRUDE"

ISAAC WENT TO CHECK ON CHARLIE what the fuck no one appreciates isaac enough what the fuck

oh they're watching a movie :( bffs :(

I love them so much your honor

also where are imogen and sahar I miss them :(

oh my GOD TORI IS ON TUMBLR

HER BEST FRIENDS HER BROTHER I LOVE YOU TORIIII

I know this season probably kills any solitaire adaptation hopes but I would have loved to see solitaire :(

omg julio IS here and being horrible at cooking!

OH MY GOD SHES LOOKING AT HIS LAPTOP

TORI'S TEXTING NICK OH MY H OD

tori 🤝 nick -> being charlie's #1 stans

OH MY GOD SHE SAID ILY

BRO THATS SO CUTEEEEEEEEEE I LOVE THEM

oh my god that's so horrifying

god you can *feel* his anxiety

I'm preemptively crying don't mind me

I was right to start preemptively crying that was *so* bad oh my god

bro charlie's face how he can't contain the tears i

im not gonna cope well with any of this

oh god im literally *sobbing*

my cat heard me sobbing, started kneading on my legs for like a few seconds and then left lmao skfkskfldkf tjsgs not good none of this is great

there's no way that was the ending

they just had me sobbing my eyes out and were like "ok time for a break" ok THANKS

please give both joe and kit like a thousand emmys

[my-castles-crumbling]

hey cas,

so, i dont really know exactly how to word things right so please bear with me while i try to explain a bit.

i think i have bipolar disorder (or something similar, im still looking into things), but i dont know if im just going crazy and imagining things. theres not really anyone in my life i can talk to about it to gauge their opinion, so im kind of left by myself to deal with it.

i dont have a trusted adult or loved one i can go to for help, and ive not been to a doctor since probably 2017 at the latest so im not even sure who id be making an appointment with to discuss anything like this. ive considered trying to get myself into therapy but im afraid that if i go in saying that i think im bipolar and have other mental illnesses (im about 99% certain i have anxiety and likely some sort of depressive disorder too, but that might be more linked with the mood swings of bipolar) that its the wrong way to go about it? like, i might just be really ignorant but i dont think thats how therapy works is it?

basically im worried that if i go in saying the disorders i think i have, then theyll tell me im exaggerating or that i need other people to back me up or that i do need to see my gp doctor (which, again, i dont actually think i have one) or that it isnt my place to try to diagnose myself etc.

im not really sure what im asking here? maybe if you have any advice/experience about what therapy is actually like or what i could expect? or a better way to go about getting help? i really dont know honestly aha, sorry

Well, you've definitely come to the right place lol, I've been to and ghosted many a therapist! (Don't ghost your therapist!)

Actually, recently I started therapy again and it's been a great experience, so let me tell you about it. Warning: I live in the US, so if you live elsewhere, it might be different.

When you start therapy, they're going to ask you a LOT of questions. Lots about your background, your childhood, your feelings, etc. It'll feel a bit invasive, but make sure to be honest! Like brutally honest. Like if you're like...'I might be feeling this way but idk if I'm faking..' tell them that. They need to know everything.

Then, if you're a minor, they'll talk to your parents and get their insight. If you have issues with your parents, make sure to tell them that BEFORE this part happens, so they can take what your parents say with a grain of salt.

Last, they'll give you a 'tentative diagnosis.' This means that this is what they think you have, but it's not a die-hard medical diagnosis. They'll treat you based on this, but if you ever wanted accommodations in school or anything for it, you would have to go to a clinical psychiatrist to get it written up.

Here's the thing: the diagnosis my surprise you or even make you feel invalidated. If it does? Tell them that. Because, two things: One- they may have gotten something wrong. Or two- they need to know if you aren't understanding something fully.

To be very personal, I am diagnosed with both depression and anxiety. When I started therapy recently and again got those diagnoses, I wasn't surprised. But I also was told I have 'illness-anxiety disorder' which is the new term for a hypochondriac. I was super insulted because I was picturing the stereotypical hypochondriac who fakes illnesses for attention (this was uneducated of me) but my therapist explained that this version of anxiety more means that I have a lot of anxiety related to being nervous to get sick or the results of getting sick. Which was like- oh. yeah. I do panic every time someone sneezes on me. My therapist said this has become increasingly common since COVID.

All this to say it sounds like seeking out therapy might be a great way for you to get the answers you're looking for. But even if they're not the answers you think they'll be, remember that your feelings and experiences are still extremely valid and no less real.

<3 <3 <3