#i posted a screenshot of this on twitter but i don't post a lot of fallout stuff there

[bluecrocss]

Also, Dior sucks. I fully understand why people don't like her.

Personally, I never got past the "Zionism thing" because that's not a "thing" to get past. Genocide is not a casual little controversy to me.

That being said, why are y'all making it the rest of the cast's problem? These people are going to be contractually obligated to work together for the next 4-6 years...

This is the same cast that used to regularly interact with their fan pages and now most of them have apparently blocked off tagging, limited their comments, etc. etc.

@randomness-is-my-order made this post about the parasocial behavior of pjo twitter (tbh, go ahead and add Instagram and tiktok to that), and it's ringing so true.

Y'all don't know these people. And to each other, they're coworkers; you don't get input on their relationships beyond that.

I'm not even going to mention how young they are, because a lot of the people engaging in these behaviors are minors, and somehow think that excuses it.

Why are you making fan accounts and edits for Walker's sister? Or his dad? Why are you screenshotting the posts they like and keeping track on who is following who and speculating on the sincerity of the birthday posts they make about each other, and so on and so on...

This is not to say not to call out problematic shit (like Dior and her bs), but keep in mind that You. Don't. Know. These. People.

Their relationships towards each other are not your business. Your engagement with them starts and ends at the show, and you are owed nothing beyond that.

[zabiume]

Could Orihime Reject Someone Out of Existence?

This is one of those statements that gets thrown around by Orihime fans a lot as a way to defend her strength, because Orihime's weakness has been a defining part of criticism surrounding her character throughout the early-mid 2000s (and even today tbh). And it's not limited to Orihime's fans either. I've seen a lot of people use this as criticism too ["Orihime could probably reject someone out of existence"...(hence it's bad that she didn't get the opportunity to do so)]. Nevermind the fact that there hasn't been a single instance where she felt a villain has even warranted that, or the fact that Soul Society goes absolutely ballistic on Quincies, who do wipe souls out of existence, I still find this to be an interesting discussion because it neglects to consider....anything we've been told about Orihime's powers. Granted, it's pretty scummy that Kubo elaborates on the structure/logistics of her powers only in extra-canon material like CFYOW (read by only a few dedicated fans) or Klub Outside (paid Q&A forum with restricted fan access), so I don't expect that everyone has done their required reading on this, but I still think it's a good excuse to actually talk about what she can and can't do.

What Orihime Can Actually Do (Basic Powers, Achievements/Growth)

At the start of Bleach, Orihime has three basic shields - 1) Soten Kisshun - the one that rejects damage within a particular area, 2) Santen Kisshun - the one that rejects any attack aimed at Orihime & her allies (AKA, a traditional shield), 3) Koten Zanshun - the shield that forms within an external object and basically blows it up. I've seen people say Koten Zanshun is a akin to a small knife or shuriken, but in classic Kuboscience fashion, we see that it actually creates a shield that disrupts the union of matter. Ostensibly, Orihime could blow someone up if she's angry enough, and it is fun to think about Orihime blowing people up, so I understand any disappointment on that front, but. Moving on.

In Chapter 43, the Shun Shun Rikka clarify that they're not really "fairies," but a manifestation of Orihime herself. They are a part of her. I assume this works similarly to zanpakuto spirit manifestation. And IIRC, she is the only Fullbringer that has this type of manifestation (object affinity + spirit), when most Fullbringers only have an object affinity. They also mention that she needs two things to activate her powers: 1) her Heart, and 2) chanting the kotodama. I think point #1 should already make clear to us that Orihime won't be abusing her powers to hurt anyone any time soon, not unless she loses her 'Heart' like Ichigo did as a Vasto Lorde in Las Noches. Bleach signifies this as an Objectively Bad Thing. Whether we agree with that or we don't, it is the underlying mythos that sets apart our hero characters (Ichigo & his friends) from our villains.

So what can Orihime do, at this point in canon? She can regrow limbs and shield people from attacks, which she does extensively throughout the Soul Society and Hueco Mundo arcs. Here she is a) using two of her shields at the same time, and b) trapping Ichigo (the strongest guy in canon at any point in time) within her shield.

Over time, she develops Shiten Kosshun, a way to incorporate Tsubaki into an offensive technique without actually compromising on her distaste for excessive violence. Here's why that's a big deal. She can also use her Shun Shun Rikka long-range, which you can see when she's a) healing Chad post-Yammy (sorry for the random color screenshot, I got it off Twitter because I couldn't remember the exact chapter), and b) in 686, when we learn she uses them to keep an eye on Kazui. She also uses Santen Kesshun as a transport service throughout TYBW, which is not something she could do during the Lust arc, since she needed Uryu's help to get there. She also does not need to say her kotodama to activate her powers anymore, which is the result of constant and continuous training with Rukia pre-HM arc and Chad post-HM arc.

Since Orihime isn't a shinigami, it might get a little difficult to measure her "growth" the same way we do with characters who attain bankai (the Bleach standard for strength). But in less than three years, Orihime developed a new shield, got faster at healing, and found new and inventive ways to use her powers every arc. She was already at lieutenant-levels of strength in terms of healing way back in the Soul Society arc, if Ieumura's testimony is anything to go by:

So...what can't Orihime do? This is what I think I've seen a majority of people scratch their heads about, thereby making her seem ridiculously overpowered but severely underused.

Like any Bleach character of significance, Orihime is ridiculously overpowered, but I don't think this translates into "Orihime can do everything" and its implied "but she chooses to do nothing." We'll get into Orihime's choices and my opinions later, but I think now is a good time to talk about Orihime's natural limitations.

What Orihime Cannot Do

Two of Orihime's major limitations that I wanted to highlight are from Klub and CFYOW, like I mentioned earlier. You can read about them below.

To summarize: 1) Orihime can't recover spiritual pressure/is very slow at recovering spiritual pressure because of the tremendous strain it puts on her body and the fact that she can only heal what she can see, 2) Orihime can't heal someone with fatal injuries if "enough time has passed" (AKA if she gets to them too late after they've been injured). 3) Orihime can't actually revive someone if they've been evaporated. She needs a physical body.

These limitations are important, because they imply that she can't actually wipe someone out of existence. Interacting with reiryoku puts a strain on her. I once wrote that she could probably "reject" an egg that's just been fertilized by a sperm (we love a pro-choice queen!), but I doubt she could zoink a 20-year-old out of existence, because again: there is a time limit within which she has to act, or her powers won't be able to work. The only rejections she could do with people are abortions, and even then, I don't think she could do late-terms. And even then, if you can't see a cell with your naked eye, I doubt she could do those either. I've seen people wonder if she could cure cancers and my honest answer is: probably not until the symptoms were obviously visible.

The Shun Shun Rikka can't actually undo something if a certain amount of time has passed, so I highly doubt she could undo one's physical body, one's spiritual pressure...one's entire being. Even if she could, I doubt that would cleanse the spirit and send it to Soul Society. Instead, they would disappear/evaporate, which destabilizes the balance of souls (the way Quincies do it).

The reason I obsess about this is because limitations are a good thing when you're exploring a power system. There's always been this misconception that Orihime can basically "do anything," but that doesn't...mean anything. Orihime can't do everything, which means she is, like every other Bleach character, limited. Even Aizen's zanpakuto had a shortcoming, so I don't think Kubo necessarily nerfed her, and I think it does help contextualize what she can actually do vs what people expect her to do for no good reason.

Even if Orihime Could, Should She?

I enjoy powerscaling as much as the next guy, but I think the thing I like the least about it is its complete lack of literacy. Specifically literacy of the narrative.

In stories like this, heroes don't win over villains because they're objectively stronger. They win because they push an ideal that, in some way, represents the core values of the series. You were stronger, but I had the power of friendship on my side. You turned your pain into violence, but I turned mine into compassion. The entire point of Ulquiorra's arrogance was that he believed in what he could see – Aizen's strength. But he lost because of what he couldn't see – Ichigo & Orihime's hearts.

A part of the Arrancar saga is the long philosophical battle between Ulquiorra and Orihime, where Ulquiorra has faith in Aizen's watertight plans, his formidable army, his impenetrable kingdom. Meanwhile, Orihime has faith in her five scrappy best friends who invaded said kingdom overnight and have,,,,,only the slightest idea about what they're doing. Aizen's entire force operates under the belief that because they can do something, they should. Because they have power, they should use it, and if they can, seek more of it. Ichigo and Orihime, as a contrast, use their discretion and seem really upset about having to fight anyone at all. People point this lack of killing intent out as an exclusively Orihime thing, but it is very much an Ichigo thing too. Ichigo looking down at Grimmjow with pity-filled eyes is an exact parallel to Orihime looking at Ulquiorra with the same expression. People wanted Orihime to be vengeful against the Arrancars because they're her abusers. But Orihime sees them as victims. She pities the fact that they know nothing but brute violence — and that this is their reality. She sees them as someone to be saved.

But lest we think she's an irrefutable saint who gets off way too easy, it's clear she has some regrets about her place in the friend group and her dependency on Ichigo in particular. But, post-HM, she doesn't ask him to save her at all. Rather, the first time we see Shiten Kosshun, she's the one protecting him. I don't think Orihime has ever needed to kill someone to prove that she's a dimensional character in a series where even Ichigo hesitates to murder the guy who killed his mother. I think it's interesting that Orihime and Ichigo are largely sympathetic towards their villains unless they really, really fuck up, in which case Orihime has lashed out in appropriate doses (see: Ginjou, Yhwach.). I don't understand what vengeance would add to her character that compassion hasn't tenfold.

A last point I want to note is about weakness and our reaction to it. Many of us are shonen-brained to a point where we divide a story into victories and losses, battles won and battles thrown. But Orihime's character arc has never been about her victory over anyone but herself. Orihime can't reject someone out of existence, and even if she could, would she want to? Would Ichigo? Throughout the story, these two have been set to contrast characters who can and did. While their enemies sought to escape their own weaknesses (which Bleach conflates with being human) through transcendence, Ichigo and Orihime chose weakness constantly. They chose to be merciful, to be kind, to be vulnerable. I've seen countless jokes about how Ichigo loses 5 times before he can win for good. I've seen Orihime get her fair share of setbacks. But they come out of it victorious anyway, against all odds. And they aren't stronger because they have the power, they're stronger because they have the heart. I simply couldn't bear losing out on character writing like that.

[vicarmax]

had a sketch of my courier from 2 years ago just collecting dust so say hi to romilly. thirty something year old telekinetic weed dealer milf. enjoy!

[userautumn]

I just always love how you talk about 911. My brain was in scrambles when I watched 8x06 because of the whole break up. But reading your thoughts about it and about the other storylines made everything a bit clearer. It also made me realize that I should, like I always did before, wait till the seasons over to pass my actual judgment about what I think about it.

That's so nice of you to say! 🥹 Thank you. I said some months ago that I lost the "hyperfixation" part of my interest in 9-1-1 and, even though I wasn't sure what that would mean for me at the time, I feel like stepping back and viewing this show outside the lens of my ardent love for it has given me a lot more clarity with how I engage with the show and their storylines. I love these characters, I love how deeply heartfelt this show is, and I love how aspects of this season have felt like a return to their classic roots (smaller cast, investing in single-episode characters so they don't just feel like "extras" but actually feel like part of the show, balancing the key dynamics, etc). I just would really love to have a lot more vision on what they're doing with the characters themselves, because right now, the visions for Eddie, Buck, and Hen (and Maddie) especially feel muddled and I don't like that. Lol. But! Time will tell, I suppose. Time will tell.

[shopwitchvamp]

might as well start warning ya'll now...

[softgrungeprophet]

i've been slowly doing my third disco run as an ultralib art cop and it's really funny to me that if you work up the willpower to successfully ask joyce for money she will straight up give you like a hundred real... like... damn okay

[justalittlebluetiefling]

I am unfortunately not above scrolling through TikTok, so this morning, I was doing that and came across a video that was just a screenshotted Tumblr post and I'M

[antisocialxconstruct]

.

[badgertracksart]

Portfolio advice, from a lead who hires Concept Artists

(This was originally a twitter thread I wrote before the site self imolated, hense it's strange structure.) I wrote this after a weekend of portfolio reviews - 1. Like a maths exam, please please show your working. I want to see thumbs options, mid options and of course a final design.

2. Arrange your portfolio, I don't want to bounce about between subject matter and pipeline. Your portfolio's narrative should be as strong as your work... 3. Please make worlds that excite the viewer, make them want to go in and explore them, explain to them the interesting parts of the town, or the way the character's hat unfolds. How will this draw the viewer in? 4. As I've said before the majority of your project work is explanatory not mood, make sure your portfolio contains explanatory work. Explained here -

5. A lot of beautiful post apocolyptic paintings, , but 80% of realistic games and film, we just give the environment artists photo ref, they are capable artists in their own right. Different work in stylised where you do need to create rules for how things can be translated. 6. Production art contains call out sheets, material references and flat graphics. This doesn't have to be your final image, but it should support it.

7. Design characters on a swatch(es) of the environment they will be viewed in. Not on white. I make swatch backgrounds from screenshots, it avoids assumptions that damage readability. 8. Reverse of this, put people in your environments, show me the scale.

9. It's not a deal breaker for a review, but if you intend to get a job, please show me your work on a screen larger than a smartphone (print outs probably the cheapest option with the best battery life). 10. Please have your contact details clearly visible, and by that I mean email address, I will not pass your social media contact on, I cannot input your form into my tracking system. EMAIL ADDRESS emblazoned and bake it in, sometimes recruiters do funky stuff to pdfs

11. Your portfolio will never feel done, not to you anyway. You will have learnt from your latest pieces and want to apply it to older work. But we know art is a journey. Send your portfolio anyway. I've been in the industry 10+ years and my portfolio is still not 'finished'. 12. If you are applying to an environment centric Concept Art position then please vary your times of day! Golden hour is cool but show me some happy sunny days, looming overcast days, what about at night? Vary your weather too! Sunny snowy day? Rainy Spring day? Stormy night?

13. If you are applying for a character centric Concept Art role then please ensure your portfolio shows a variety of body types and ethnicities. 14. Designing characters for games? Please show back views and feet (!) Many potfolios contain only front views. This is a problem because:

You haven't shown you are considering the design from all angles.

In many games rear view is the main view.

Stop cropping feet.

15. If you are entry / graduating and looking at Portfolios to compare content and standard of yr own work too, look at hired grad/junior artists as opposed to seniors Seniors and leads often have old or personal work in their portfolio which isnt representative of the day job. 16a. Show clearly the intended use case for your Concept Art. Mention the game type in the description. Are these player character designs for a 3rd person adventure game? Then more back views please. Bonus points for diagetic ways of showing health / equipment / role etc.

16b. Are these designs for an FPS? Then really the player view of the gun needs to sell the player style/ choices, in an FPS your weapons are almost your character. Are these world designs? What's the view distance? For an RTS your shapes need to read from above & a distance. 16c. The lack of clarification means I am judging the design in isolation, which both harms the design (you might be considering the backview of a char as the main adventure character.) Or an NPC, their waist up expressions may be important for conveying exposition and mechanics.

16d. Concept art is not separate from gameplay, great concept art serves the game team before it is a good illustration.

17. Play games. A variety of games. Think about them. IMO to be a good concept artist you need to understand the common language & references used by your peers. Also understand the principles and common language your audience are used to. FPS design rules are v.diff from RTS.

18. There are many skills that are needed in concept art, please show them. For example: Graphic design - logos, liveries, typographic use etc. VFX concepts - Abilities, Ambience, motion concepts. Architectural knowledge - How buildings are built! & more but I'm out of space :O

[dottdraws]

Let's talk about Shavs Media Productions

I wanted to make this post a little earlier on, but completely forgot to put it on Tumblr. In case no one is aware, I was one of her co producers. I helped run the channel for a bit and was hesitant to share my experiences with her. After hearing that she was not treating other people in my position very well, I decided to come forward. For those who choose to follow the rabbithole, please be warned there are mentions of N/S/F/W talk, racism, transphobia, and other things. There's a LOT about this that we uncovered since posting. Lots of people are hurt. This is your warning. Here's the link to the post on Twitter.

For those of you who can't see it there, I'll just post the direct link to the document here. The archive of screenshots I have is posted at the beginning.

It's important to note that this is to spread awareness of her past actions and hold her accountable. Shavs uses Tumblr as a platform to recruit artists, and it's important people know what they're getting into by working with her. Many many others have come forth to corroborate the things talked about in this document that are not in the posted Archive at the beginning. While she is saying that she is making changes and coming forward with a public statement, Tumblr is still a preferred choice of recruitment platform for her. Don't witchhunt, spread rumors, or harass people. This is the open door for those who've been affected to come out. Spread this around. Share your own stories. Hold her accountable, please.

[porcelana-r0ta]

let the mourners come

Title: let the mourners come

Ao3 Link: Only available to Ao3 users

Word Count: 3045

Summary:

It started, as most things do with Danny Fenton, as a joke.

It ended, as most things do with Jazz Fenton, with things better than they were before.

xxXxx

When Danny finally gets a Twitter, it’s during Elon Musk’s shit show takeover. He’s able to secure a good Twitter handle thanks to people leaving en masse and fleeing to Tumblr. He knows about things that happen outside of Amity Park (he is terminally online rather than chronically, after all), but he still doesn’t think anything of using @TheJoker as his handle, even knowing about Gotham City’s clown troubles. It’s just going to be a shitpost account, anyway, one that dances in the chaos of Elon’s electronic graveyard. Nothing will come about him using @TheJoker when he’s merely posting things like, “Just grew a new row of teeth!!! very pointy but can’t go to the dentist anymore bc they might turn me in to the giw.”

So Danny honestly never foresaw The Actual Real Joker breaking out of Arkham Asylum all the way in Gotham City, New Jersey, and deciding to get a Twitter account to terrorize people online as well as offline. And he definitely never foresaw The Joker @’ing him on Twitter, demanding that Danny change his Twitter handle. But, well. Here he was. 

[Image Description: A screenshot of a Twitter reply chain, starting with the real Joker @'ing Danny's Twitter account, which uses TheJoker as his Twitter handle. The Joker, who has a verified account, demands that Danny "change your handle", and Danny replies with a simple "no" followed by red heart emoji. The Joker Tweets, "Kid you don't know who you're fucking with," to which Danny replies, "Ye I do ur some dude w/ poor fashion sense and lame jokes. Maybe try badjokesbyjeff bc originality is ugly on u" followed by a shrugging emoticon. The Joker responds, "Check your DMs." Danny then responds, "Perf [happy emoji surrounded by hearts] I've sent you a time and place. Can't wait to beat the shit out of another disgrace of a clown." Someone with the username "Gregg rulz ok" responds to Danny's last Tweet, "Bro is absolutely RATIOING the joker but the clown keeps responding [three skull emojis] embarrassing frfr too bad he's gonna die for realsies".

End ID]

Danny is quick to respond and then makes even quicker work of roasting The Joker. This soon results in The Joker DMing him his IP Address and a creative threat. Still, Danny isn’t about to cow to a clown with no respect for the art of clowning. He replies to the DM: 

Cool, meet me at the Nasty Burger parking lot in Amity Park IL on tuesday at 2am

The response from The Joker is quick:

Fourteen year olds are too confident these days

Danny rolls his eyes and ignores the influx of notifications from Twitter, and instead makes another Tweet.

Imagine beefing with someone over a Twitter handle lol acc so embarrassing for him

He blackens his screen and stretches in bed, letting his spine pop more than what is humanly possible. He runs his tongue over that second row of teeth, his lips curling into a grin. 

xxXxx

Gothamite Twitter is blowing up over The Joker’s social media beef with a faceless shitposting account. Jason, upon finding out about it, has a series of reactions: first, he looks up the shitposter and follows them. Then, he finds the actual chain between the poster and The Joker, and his vision goes vibrant green when he sees that The Joker’s profile picture is of the second Robin, beaten and swollen in an abandoned building in Ethiopia. 

When his vision clears and he can breathe without wanting to kill, he likes the shitposter’s replies, and he calls the Replacement to see if the other Bats know already.

“We know,” Tim says in lieu of a hello when the ringing cuts out. “We’re working on it.”

“What, you think anything’s gonna come of it?” But even as Jason asks, he already knows the answer. The Joker is unhinged and once he’s threatened something, he’ll follow up unless he comes up with a “funnier” option. 

Tim’s breath hitches, and he says, “I’ve hacked their DMs. Joker knows the kid’s IP address and sent it to him. He knows everything from that address alone.”

He pauses in the middle of suiting up, “Kid?”

He hears Tim swallow, “Yes, kid. He’s fifteen. And he gave The Joker a specific time and place to meet up to fight. In his own hometown.”

“Are— are you fucking kidding me?” 

“No. B is already calling Nightwing. We’re taking the Batwing to Illinois.”

“Jesus fuck. I’ll be there in twenty.”

“Hood, I—”

“Shut up, I’m already in my gear.” He hangs up without waiting for a response. 

He refreshes the Twitter feed and barks a laugh at the newest Tweet:

Jason Todd votes, and the Red Hood leaves his safe house. 

xxXxx

A commercial flight to Illinois takes around two and a half hours. In the Batwing, they get there in an hour, and don’t even have to worry about the drive from Chicago to a small speck of a town like Amity Park. They spend the quick flight learning everything they can about Daniel James Fenton, the owner of the Twitter account, and they can all sense the growing tension from (and between) Bruce and Jason.

But, well. Jason doesn’t care. Let them be uncomfortable. It doesn’t compare to being ripped back into life and finding out his dad didn’t even get justice for his death. 

When they reach town, it doesn’t take long to find the Fentons’ home. This is in part because Amity Park is a very navigable town, and because of the giant neon sign proclaiming FentonWorks on the side of the building. 

“Is that a blimp?” Dick asks. “Why don’t we have a blimp?” 

“Where would we keep it?” the Demon Brat counters practically. “Goliath takes up all of the Cave’s extra space.” 

Jason rolls his eyes and knows veins would be popping out of Bruce’s forehead if it weren’t for the cowl. 

“Let’s go,” Bruce says instead, and they all make their way to the house. 

Nightwing, predictably, goes for the front door approach. Jason rolls his eyes as he takes one of the second-story windows and finds his way downstairs.

He gets down at the same time that a redheaded girl answers the door and nearly slams it in Dick’s face. Jason has to suppress snickers at the sight. 

“Wait, wait, wait, are you Jazz Fenton? We need to talk to your brother!” 

“...We?” she asks, then tenses and turns around to see the rest of the Bats in the hall behind her. Dick takes the opportunity to step in completely, closing the door behind him. “Wha— what’s going on?”

“Where are your parents, Jazz?” Bruce makes every question sound like a demand. Jason rolls his eyes from behind his mask—way to put the teenager at ease, B.

“Why do you need to know?” Her voice has a defensive edge to it. “What do you want with Danny?” 

“Hey, it’s okay,” Nightwing comforts. “He didn’t do anything too bad, just said some dumb things online. It’s not his fault.” 

This relaxes her, and her shoulders begin un-hunching. “Oh, s-so what’d he do?”

“He foolishly challenged The Joker to a battle in a ‘Nasty Burger’ parking lot tonight.” 

“You could’ve had some more tact, Robin,” Nightwing scolds. But the Demon Spawn just crosses his arms. 

“He did what?” Jazz shrieks. “Like, The Joker from Gotham? That Joker?”

“Are there others?” Red Hood comments dryly. 

Her face goes through several different emotions—disbelief, rage, fear, and then rage again, “DANIEL JAMES FENTON! GET DOWN HERE RIGHT NOW!” 

There’s a thumping noise, and then frantic footsteps down the stairs. 

“Wha? Who died?” asks the figure of a tiny fifteen-year-old, smaller than even Jason had been when he was alone with The Joker. He’s tiny and lanky. Zero muscle definition. Eye bags to rival the Replacement’s. Something ripples in the Pit, deep and distinct, but he can’t name what causes it.

Oh, this kid is so dead. 

“Danny,” says Jazz calmly while Danny blinks uncomprehendingly at the heroes in their hallway. She is solemn when she says, “I’m afraid I’m going to have to kill you now.” 

“What did I do?” 

She stares at him, “Why have you scheduled a fight with The Joker?” 

“Oh, that.” He rubs the back of his neck, “Is he taking that seriously?”

“Of course he is, Danny! It’s The Joker! That’s what he does! He can’t differentiate between a joke and reality! He would tear off his own face for the bit!” 

“Oof,” is all Danny can muster. He digs his phone out and starts typing before Jazz yanks it out his hand. 

“You’re fucking TWEETING about this?” Jazz asks incredulously, and Hood’s hackles rise. She even reads the Tweet aloud, “‘Just found out @TheJ0ker is being fr about fighting me. Sad but i can take a clown.’”

“I was gonna add ‘i’ve done it b4,’ but like the letter and the number four. But yeah.” 

“You’re grounded forever.” Danny opens his mouth to protest, but the look Jazz cuts at him is so scathing that he shuts his mouth. Hood is reluctantly impressed—she had what could be cultivated into a fantastic Batglare. She pockets the phone, “You’re never getting this phone back. Taunting The Joker to Amity? Have you any brain cells? What if he brings Joker gas with him, huh? Or any of his goons? What if he starts hurting other people? Have you thought any of this through?” 

Danny’s face goes from tired to chastised, his lips drawing into a frown, especially at the mention of other people. 

“I’m sorry,” he says. “I didn’t think that he’d take it so seriously.”

“He sent you your IP Address.”

“I thought that was just a random string of numbers?”

“Oh my god,” Jazz despairs. “Oh my god. Grounded forever. See, I know you're lying to me. I know you're lying because Tucker, the nerdiest tech nerd to have ever been born, is your best friend.”

He rubs the back of his neck, “I tune him out?”

“You’re still lying to me?” Jazz scoffs and turns to Batman, “Do whatever you want with him. I’m not going to defend him from this.” 

“Hey!” complained her brother, but Batman just continued on, “Where are your parents?”

“They’re in Sweden for a science convention,” Jazz answers. “They left this morning.” 

Damn, Jason curses to himself. 

“Jazz, seriously. You’re not gonna let Batman kill me, right?” 

“Do you want to be cremated or buried, Danny?” Jazz asks blasély, and Danny gulps, refusing to meet anyone’s eyes. 

“It’s my Twitter handle,” he mutters petulantly, and Jason can’t believe the gall of this kid. Or maybe stupidity. Audacity’s a good one, too. “If he wanted it, he should’ve gotten it first. And he gives clowns a bad name.” 

“Not the clown thing again.” Jazz digs her palms into her eyes, sighs, then turns to the heroes. “He has a whole clown thing ever since Circus Gothica came to town and robbed a bunch of jewelry stores.” 

Danny gestures wildly with his hands, as if demonizing clowns was the real problem and not the egomaniacal mass murderer who wanted to murder him for his Twitter handle, “Clowning is an art form, Jazz, and people like Freakshow and The Joker make a mockery of the very serious societal statements that clowns make!” 

All of the Bats very carefully Did Not look at Nightwing, who has made very similar rants on quiet patrols.

“You are never leaving this house again,” she says serenely. “And I’m unplugging the wifi router.”

“You would punish even yourself?”

“Oh, little brother. I would watch the world burn if it meant knocking sense into your thick skull.” 

“Okay, Christ,” Red Hood finally interrupted the siblings’ melodrama. An unyielding redheaded girl and a mouthy black-haired, blue-eyed boy? They’d fit in a little too well back at the Manor, so Jason needs to cut this shit out before Bruce’s bat-doption instincts start tingling. “Stop. Just… Christ. Stop. Is this how you always interact with each other?”

“Sometimes there’s explosions,” Danny pipes up, a cheeky grin on his face. 

Jazz doesn’t dispute it. 

Fucking hell. God damn it. I can’t. I just can’t. 

Batman doesn’t give anything away, “Robin and Red Robin will be staying here with you until Nightwing, Hood, and I apprehend The Joker. First, we’re going to check the perimeter.” 

“Oooh, I get to give the lab tour!” 

Lab?

“No lab. You’re grounded. You’ll only be in there for cleaning duty now.”

“Wh– hey! No fair!” 

“What’s this lab you two are talking about?” Red Robin asks before Jazz can rip into her brother again. 

She sighs, “Our parents’ lab. I’ll show you, but someone needs to stay with Danny.” 

“You act like I’m gonna run off and start World War III….”

“I wonder why,” she says sarcastically.

Batman nods to Robin, who nods back, and the rest of them follow Jazz out of the living room to a metal reinforced door. She types in a code—Jason catches the numbers 03-14-99. There’s an assenting beep, and she opens the door, flicking on the lights and leading them down into what is apparently a basement lab. 

A stone settles in Red Hood’s stomach, cold and heavy. 

The basement is large, likely the floor size of the entire building. There are several work tables, filled with miscellaneous blueprints and spare parts and weapons and tools. Against the farthest wall is another armored door, but what draws Hood’s—and the entire Batclan’s—attention is the south wall, where a circular hole in the wall was glowing a toxic Pit green. 

The stone shattered in his stomach, splintering into his body. Is it harder or easier to breathe? Jason can’t tell. 

“Wow,” says Nightwing. His voice is cheerful, but Jason can feel the stress beneath it. “Do I even want to know?” 

Wasn’t this supposed to just be typical Joker bullshit?

“Our parents are ectobiologists,” Jazz explains nonchalantly, walking further into the lab. “As in, ghost biologists.” She pauses at one of the work tables, picking up a green and white thermos. Pretty boring, considering the rest of their surroundings. 

“Ghosts.” Red Robin’s voice is carefully neutral. 

“Ghosts,” Jazz reaffirms. “I know. I thought they were crazy at first, too. But I can prove it, if you like.” Then, without waiting for a yes or no, she untwists the thermos, and there’s a bright flash of white, and a whole entire body sprouting out of it. 

“WHOO! I’M FREE!” cries the…being, pale and floating and lanky and entirely too big to have fit into a fucking thermos, of all the fucking things. “....And not in the Realms? Wait.” He stops stretching, descending to rest closer to the ground, but still hovering a few inches from the floor. He’s got green eyes and lifeless (ha) blond hair. He’s wearing a trenchcoat and a green skull necklace. Overall, he looks like the type of thug he’d arrest in the Bowery. 

“Hello, Johnny.” The man’s—ghost’s?—eyes flicker around each person in the room, his gaze becoming more and more confused and panicked as he takes in each Bat, before settling on Jazz Fenton. 

“Why are the fucking Bats here?” 

“The Joker’s coming to Amity,” she says. The ghost’s eyes widen. Jazz tilts her head, “How many ghosts would you say passed away in Gotham, Johnny?” 

As Jason and the Bats tense, this Johnny guy lets out a wicked laugh, “Oh, Doll, you have the best surprises. Why did we break up?” 

“You did try to have my body possessed. That ruins any good relationship.” 

“Man, but Kitty’ll love this. Thanks for letting me out of Soup Time, Doll.” He floats higher, “Any advice?” 

She throws him the phone she’d confiscated from Danny and he catches it easily, “Everything’s on here. Have fun.”

“What exactly are you planning?” Batman scowls. 

Johnny laughs, “Aww, don’t worry, Bats. Peace and love on Planet Earth, or whatever. We’ll make it quick.” Then, as the Bats leap into action as one, Johnny turns invisible, the Batarangs passing harmlessly through where he’d once been floating. 

“Where did he go?” Batman turns his scowl, angrier than ever, to Jazmin Fenton, who stares back unflinchingly. “He’s going to solve the problem.”

“You mean he’s going to kill The Joker.”

She shakes her head, “Oh, no. That’d just be asking for him to come back as a ghost. Could you imagine a Joker with powers like invisibility, intangibility, flight, and more? Johnny can be impulsive, but he’s smart. None of them will kill The Joker.” 

“Then what are they going to do?” Red Robin asks. 

“My parents are ectobiologists,” Jazz repeats from earlier. “But I am more of an anthro-ectopologist. I am concerned with the study of ectoplasmic beings’ societies and cultures. And while it is very ancient, there is protocol in the Infinite Realms—that is, where you go when you die, should you remain after death—to prosecute living criminals who have killed a certain number of Realms citizens. So you don’t have to worry about your moral code, Batman. The Joker will be tried by a much fairer court than Gotham can ever hope to have. No offense.” 

Jason stares at Jazz Fenton, who he’d pegged as the sane sibling. He’s not so sure now, but he can’t say he hates it.

“And how do we know it’s a fair trial?” Nightwing asks. 

She waves her hand, “Oh, as Gotham’s Knights, you’re key witnesses. I’m sure you’ll be summoned to testify. You will see then. And don’t worry about your secret identities—the dead don’t care much for that sort of thing.” 

“So if this is a ‘fair’ trial or whatever, The Joker’s going to be locked up forever?” Jason asks. “I mean, that’s the only option for shit like him.” 

Batman sends him a look, but he ignores it. 

“Well, there are several different punishments that could be deemed appropriate, but he’ll never be able to set foot in the mortal world again, yes.” 

Jason Todd grins, “Oh, I’m glad your brother’s stupid, kid.” 

She sighs, long-suffering, “Well, that makes one of us. Still, there’s more important things we should discuss now that you’re here.”

“More important than The Joker trying to kill your brother over a Twitter handle?” Red Robin asks doubtfully. 

Jazz smiles, sharp and dangerous, and asks, ”Have you ever heard of the Anti-Ecto Acts?” 

xxXxx

Several months later when Danny is finally un-grounded, he Tweets his last three Tweets before Twitter can become the foolishly named X: 

Imagine bullying the Joker so hard that it not only lands the Joker in ghost prison BUT it also leads to major law reform in the US lmao someone make the domino effect meme about this pls

Y’allre replying to me with thanks like i did anything other than be an internet troll. My sister literally manipulated local, federal, and interdimensional law so you should be thanking her. 

i just a babie 🥺🥺🥺

xxXxx

Thanks for reading! This is the whole fic, so pls do not ask for tags! Thank you :)

[etherealstar-writes]

I WANNA BE YOURS | WOSO X READER | PT 17

pairings: woso x reader

summary: in which you're accidentally added to a random group chat, not knowing they're all actually famous footballers, and obliviously end up having many of them competing for your love and attention.

part: seventeen

part one here

✦ ——— ✦ ——— ✦

Y/N PROTECTION SQUAD

lotte has anyone checked on y/n lately?

lessi no why? what's up

lotte i feel like she's been trying to ignore us and the groupchat is quite dead that itself should be ringing some bells

niamh last time i saw her was when we went to nandos together a week ago but i could tell she was feeling a bit down, and these past few days she keeps saying she's busy or tired whenever i try to make plans with her

charli same here

leah wait you guys went to nandos again?!

steph that's what's concerning you the most rn omg? nandos? and not my child?

kyra i think we should revoke leah's privileges to be in this chat tbh raise your hand if you agree ✋

niamh ✋

lotte ✋

lessi ✋

charli ✋

katie ✋

steph ✋

georgia ✋

ona ✋

ella ✋

viv ✋

leah EXCUSE ME?! ALSO SINCE WHEN WAS VIV PART OF THIS GC?!

kyra see that just shows how uninvested leah is in this gc she isn't worthy to be part of the y/n protection squad

leah kyra istg you're gonna catch these hands the next time i see you

steph oi you won't lay a hand on my children not on my watch, williamson

kyra thank you mum 🥰

the REAL karate kid guys have we noticed that y/n's disabled comments on all her posts lately?

viv the fans and media can be quite toxic i won't be surprised if they caught up to her

niamh sent a few screenshots

kyra oh.

lotte no wonder she's been trying to avoid us she's most definitely seen all those tweets

katie i'm gonna fight em 😈

kyra i'm joining you 😈

niamh count me in 😈

georgia me too 😈

lotte guess i'll see you all on the battlefield

steph the battlefied it is

✦ ——— ✦ ——— ✦

THE NATIONAL DIVING TEAM

brightness why are we at war in twitter rn

sam the skippa HELP this is so entertaining

rusty metal @ the imposter aka y/n ❤️

meado y/n you need to see this

the imposter aka y/n ❤️ what is happening

mccard y/n protection army reporting for duty

meado

willybum DAMN YES STEPH

rusty metal i need more popcorn for this

the imposter aka y/n ❤️ stop you guys tysm i'm crying

the REAL karate kid you see those are the more .... civilised ones and then there's kyra's ones

pest don't be shy show em 😈

the REAL karate kid

willybum KYRA 😭😭

the imposter aka y/n ❤️ thank you kyra 😈

pest you're very welcome y/n 😈

kie ONA WHO TAUGHT YOU THIS 😭😭

the imposter aka y/n ❤️ PLS IM SO PROUD OF YOU ILYSM HAHAHA

pest our teachings have paid off

ona they sure have pookie 😈

rusty metal STOP 😭😭 you two are banned from teaching her slang

pest it's not our fault you're a grandma

the imposter aka y/n ❤️ okay but genuinely thank you so much everyone you guys really didn't have to back me up there but it truly means a lot to have your support i love you all so much 🥺😭❤️🙏

pest we love ya too y/n ❤️

mccard ❤️

stephy ❤️

neev ❤️

cha cha ❤️

elton ❤️

meado ❤️

viv ❤️

ona ❤️

rusty metal ❤️

the REAL karate kid ❤️

stairway ❤️

willybum ❤️

✦ ——— ✦ ——— ✦

[joonipertree]

tags: fluff, just fluff, kenma being a #streamer. i love streamer kenma it scratches that itch in me that craves a parasocial kind of love.

"Kenmaaaa" you drawled while opening the door, leaning heavily against the doorframe of your boyfriend's office room.

It took you five seconds to register where Kenma was sitting, which was in front of the computer unsurprisingly, and the camera that had a red light on. The second monitor to his left was showcasing Kenma on the screen while the third one had an onslaught of comments popping up.

oh shi--

You jumped back, mostly out of surprise.

"Yes, honey?" Kenma spoke, one side of his headphones off as he turned towards you. "The camera won't pick up on you, don't worry."

You crept back in, feeling nervous even though the camera wasn't even on you.

"Sorry, I didn't realise you were streaming."

"Nothing to apologise for. What's up? Need me for something?" He urged you forward and you padded your way inside, the only comfort being in proximity to your boyfriend.

"I-uh- didn't feel like cooking so I thought we could order something?" You were halfway through your sentence when Kenma picked up his phone. He was nodding along, opening an app in it.

"What are you feeling?" He murmured, completely ignoring the eruption of comments blasting on his screen. There was a lot of yelling. You tried not to look at it but it drew you in, most of it was gibberish and question marks. You could make out the words 'WHAT' and 'DATING???' a lot.

"I'm not sure? Feeling indecisive today." You probably had an idea but it had vanished a couple of minutes back.

"Want burgers? Pizza?" Kenma didn't even seem to care at that point, solely focused on his phone. He did take a hold of your hand though, running his thumb through your knuckles.

THAT caught on camera and the gibberish got louder and faster.

"Burgers sound good." You snapped back to him, letting his hand ground you.

"That burger place you like?"

"Yes please."

"Honey mustard one?"

"Yes."

"Mh-hmmm." Kenma dragged out the sound before placing in his own order.

"Wanna get ice cream? Been craving it." He worked quick to add it in, knowing what you wanted but still asking in case you changed your mind.

"I can pay for the---"

"Shut the fuck up." Kenma murmured with only an upward glance at you, a small smile on his face when you pouted.

You finally took a look at the main monitor, a pretty sunset with the main character looking off into the distance on the screen. "What game you playin?"

"It's a fantasy game. Pretty new, haven't even started yet. You'd like it, it's very pretty." Kenma turned the monitor a bit so you could see it, pressing play so some more of the graphics would come on screen. You let out a little gasp, taking it all in.

When you realised that there were a lot of people waiting, you blinked out of your revery and threw an apologetic look at Kenma.

"Sorry, you were busy and--"

"Never too busy for you." Kenma murmured again and scooted towards you till he was just out of frame, his lips puckering up while he craned his neck upwards, too lazy to stand up.

You laughed and gave him a peck on the lips, then the nose and then the forehead. He grinned widely, adjusting back into the same position he was in before.

"I'll talk to you later, okay?" You call out and walk back.

"Okay, baby."

You were about to close the door when you head a very disgruntled, 'shut the fuck up.' from Kenma. Curious about what he would say, you listened in from the hallway.

"Yeah I am dating someone. No, I'm not saying their name....we've been dating for a while now. I am not soft for them....okay chat keep the screenshots between us....what do you mean they're already on twitter??? Ya'll are annoying. No, Kuroo I'm not buying you food. Yeah, they are special, dumbass."

You grinned so wide your cheeks hurt, already scrolling through twitter to see if people actually posted anything...

.....Kenma's name was trending

And oh the thread of pictures after pictures, of his eyes turning into liquid, his smile, the hand holding yours that. It was enough in the frame for his thumb to be seen. The person that posted it was SCREAMING about how soft he is.

Then there was a screenshot of him tilting his head upwards and your hair was the only thing that showed up as you kissed him. There was a fire hazard in the comments. It made you chortle. You saved all of them to use as leverage. Seeing as Kuroo was retweeting some of them, he had them too.

A/N: second day in a row im posting kenma hehehehehehhehehehhe hyperfixation tyme

[mostlysignssomeportents]

A media literacy handbook for Israel-Gaza

Next Tuesday (Oct 31) at 10hPT, the Internet Archive is livestreaming my presentation on my recent book, The Internet Con.

Media explainers are a cheap way to become an instant expert on everything from billionaire submarine excursions to hellaciously complex geopolitical conflicts, but On The Media's "Breaking News Consumers' Handbooks" are explainers that help you understand other explainers:

https://www.wnycstudios.org/podcasts/otm/segments/breaking-news-consumers-handbook-israel-and-gaza-edition-on-the-media

The latest handbook is an Israel-Gaza edition. It doesn't aim to parse fine distinctions over the definition of "occupation" or identify the source of shell fragments. Rather, it offers seven bullet points' worth of advice on weighing all the other news you hear about the war:

https://media.wnyc.org/media/resources/2023/Oct/27/BNCH_ISRAEL_GAZA_EDITION_1.pdf

I. "Headlines are obscured by the fog of war"

Headline writers have a hard job under the best of circumstances – trying to snag your interest in a few words. Headlines can't encompass all the nuance of a story, and they are often written by editors, not the writers who produced the story. Between the imperatives for speed and brevity and the broken telephone between editors and writers, it's easy for headlines to go wrong, even when no one is attempting to mislead you. Even reliable outlets will screw up headlines sometimes – and that likelihood goes way up in times like these. You gotta read the story, not just the headline.

II. Know red flags for bullshit

The factually untrue information that spreads furthest tends to originate with a handful of superspreader accounts. Whether these people are Just Wrong or malicious disinfo peddlers, they share a few characteristics that should trip your BS meter and prompt extra scrutiny:

High-frequency posting

Emotionally charged framing

Posts that purport to be summaries or excerpts from news outlets, but do not include links to the original

The phrase "breaking news" (no one has that many scoops)

III. Don't trust screenshots

Screenshots of news stories, tweets, and other social media should come with links to the original. It's just too damned easy to fake a screenshot.

IV. "Know your platform"

It used to be that Twitter got a lot of first-person accounts from people in the thick of crises, while Facebook and Reddit contained commentary and reposts. Today, Twitter is just another aggregator. This time around, there's lots of first-person, real-time reporting coming off Telegram (it runs well on old phones and doesn't chew up batteries). Instagram is widely used in both Israel and the West Bank.

V. "Crisis actors" aren't a thing

People who attribute war images to "crisis actors" are either deluded or lying. There's plenty of ways to distort war news, but paying people to pretend to be grieving family members is essentially unheard of. Any explanation that involves crisis actors is a solid reason to permanently block that source.

VI. There's plenty of ways to verify stuff that smells fishy

TinEye, Yandex and Google Image Search are all good tools for checking "breaking" images and seeing if they're old copypasta ganked from earlier conflicts (or, you know, video-games). The fact that an image doesn't show up in one of these searches doesn't guarantee its authenticity, of course.

VII. Think before you post

Israel-Gaza is the most polluted media pool yet. Don't make it worse.

There's plenty more detail on this (especially on the use of verification tools) in Brooke Gladstone's radio segment:

https://www.wnycstudios.org/podcasts/otm/episodes/on-the-media-breaking-news-consumers-handbook-israel-gaza-edition

The media environment sucks, and warrants skepticism and caution. But we also need to be skeptical of skepticism itself! As danah boyd started saying all the way back in 2018, weaponized media literacy leads to conspiratorialism:

https://www.zephoria.org/thoughts/archives/2018/03/09/you-think-you-want-media-literacy-do-you.html

Remember, the biggest peddlers of "fake news" are also the most prolific users of the term. For a lot of these information warriors, the point isn't to get you to believe them – they'll settle for you believing nothing. "Flood the zone with bullshit" is Steve Bannon's go-to tactic, and it's one that his acolytes have picked up and multiplied.

It's important to be a critical thinker, but there's plenty of people who've figured out how to weaponize a critical viewpoint and turn it into nihilism. Remember, the guy who wrote How To Lie With Statistics was a tobacco industry shill who made his living obfuscating the link between smoking and cancer. It's absolutely possible to lie with statistics, but it's also possible to use statistics to know the truth, as Tim Harford explains in his 2021 must-read book The Data Detective:

https://pluralistic.net/2021/01/04/how-to-truth/#harford

There's a world of difference between being misled and being brainwashed. A lot of today's worry about "disinformation" and "misinformation" has the whiff of a moral panic:

https://www.nakedcapitalism.com/2023/10/are-we-having-a-moral-panic-over-misinformation.html

It's possible to have a nuanced view of this subject – to take steps to enure you're not being tricked without equating crude tricks like sticking a fake BBC chyron on a 10-year-old image with unstoppable mind-control:

https://sts-news.medium.com/youre-doing-it-wrong-notes-on-criticism-and-technology-hype-18b08b4307e5

If you'd like an essay-formatted version of this post to read or share, here's a link to it on pluralistic.net, my surveillance-free, ad-free, tracker-free blog:

https://pluralistic.net/2023/10/28/fog-o-war/#breaking-news

[drvscarlett]

Let Him Cook Pt4

Series Part 1, 2, 3, 4

Taglist: @bookstore-of-dreams @barcelonaloverf1life @ririyulife @minseok-smaus @mehrmonga @sltwins @charlesgirl16 @six-call @spideybv28 @casperlikej @weekendlusting @janeholt3 @evie-119 @leilanixx @randomgirlnumber-13 @itsjustkhaos

Y/NCooks just posted a photo.

Y/NCooks Finally some vitamin seaaaaaaaaaaaaa

User1 Oh she is living the life!

Friend1 Say hi to the boyfriend for me

YNCooks he says hi Friend1 enjoy lovebirds!!!

User2 She is so hot and her boyfriend is equally hot. Power couple!

User3 Something about that back and that filter seems kinda familiar.

User4 OMG right? Its like I know it from somewhere but I can't pinpoint it. User5 I thought I was the only one but it seems like its really familiar.

User6 Its giving a pinterest vibes! She is everything I aspire to be.

User7 Are you still the one in-charge of cooking Y/N?

Y/NCooks Yuppp. But don't worry because he lifts the grocery and pays for the food, its an equal relationship User8 The boyfriend seems like a catch

User9 God when will it be me?

Charles_Leclerc just posted a photo.

Charles_Leclerc good food and good company

User1 Who is that??? Who is that hand?????

User2 Charles is finally breaking his single streak, a sad day for all the Charles girlies

PierreGasly Oh so that's why your boat was missing Charles_Leclerc I'm not discussing it here PierreGasly We just want to know, who is the lucky lady User3 Ohmygod Pierre just found out just like we all did

User4 That blue filter is back

User5 Just when we thought he forgot about it

User6 why is everyone and their partners softlaunching in a yacht

User7 who else is in a yacht? User6 There's this homecook and masterchef winner named Y/N that is softlaunching their partner on a yacht User7 Oh bestie that back looks familiar, don't you think User9 User9 SUSPICIOUS!!! User9 Nah, I highly doubt Charles can bag a chef. I mean the man couldn't cook pasta and its just pasta User7 you are probably right, im just delulu

"This is getting mildly annoying"Charles pouted "Usually they are quick to connect the pieces"

"All in due time honey"

It was actually a funny thing for you since fans find it highly impossible that Charles could bag a chef as his partner. You wouldn't tell Charles but you admit that his cooking skills is not a major selling point to a lot of chefs out there.

Ever since MasterChef ended, you two have been open about going public. The relationship has been kept in wraps for over 3 years so Charles is feeling pretty confident that it has already been a tested by time. But more than that, Charles opened up how he wanted to go public so that he'll be able to showcase his support.

"I can't wait for them to figure it out just so I can tell the world that I am the luckiest guy in the world for having you as my partner" he clings to you as a loopy smile appears on his face.

"And I can't wait to showcase the world how you have been drastically improving with your cooking skills" you smile "You can be my sous chef when you are off season"

"I'm not really sure if you are being sarcastic but I'll take this as a win and I'm considering myself masterchef approved"

The Gordon incident

There were 5 missed calls from Charles which made you slightly worried. You were unable to answer the call since you were driving home. You immediately rushed to the apartment and you saw a weird scenario. Charles was spread out on the floor, face down and seems to be in pain.

"What happened to you?"you asked as you set down your bag at the counter.

"Leave me be, I am a disgrace. I have fallen from heaven." Charles moped.

"Seriously honey, what's going on. You are scaring me"

Charles only lifted his phone for you to look at. You looked at it and it was a screenshot from Twitter with a quote tweet from Gordon about the pasta incident.

"Charles, you can't bag a chef if your cooking is as disastrous as that. Call me when you have the time-Oh my god. Gordon did not just say that" you burst out laughing.

"Laugh in my misery, go ahead and laugh."

You have to contain your giggles but then you cannot seem to help yourself. Charles continued to mope at the floor how no one will believe that you are his girlfriend now.

"It was just one time that I wasn't able to cook pasta properly, one time"

"Yes honey but the internet is forever"

After a while, Charles got up and you were slightly confused when he started bringing out the pots and pans out of the cupboard. He took out some of the pasta and then he grabbed his apron.

"You are going to teach me and we won't stop till I get a good pasta redemption" Charles said with full determination.

There was a bright idea that suddenly popped in your head, "I think I can do something better than that"

You started to type in your phone and after a while your phone started ringing. A familiar face on the screen and Charles almost fainted after hearing the accent.

"YOU GOT GORDON ON SPEED DIAL TO TEACH ME?"

Dinner with the drivers

The Australian Grand Prix was the first time that you actually met Charles' friends and former teammates. Charles arranged for an exclusive dinner with the grid drivers of 2025 in your restaurant.

"How did you get a reservation here Charles? I have been trying to get one for my parents, they love the Chef here and supported her during the masterchef days"Oscar asked.

"I know someone" Charles was trying his best to suppress his grin and elaborate further.

"Make sure to tell me later, I would love to bring my parents here. Cheers mate"

Dinner went on progressively well. There were variation of cuisines available and it catered to their specific Even Lewis loved that the vegan option was vast and Nando even agrees that if this is how much food options vegan has then he can go Vegan.

It was now tiMe for dessert and some drivers opted for a coffee while some thinks they deserve for a cheat day.

"Is this Ferrari's new strategy to shaving weight?"Max joked "Make the other drivers eat more so the car will be unbalanced"

"Fred is getting more creative with his strategy eh. Last year with my appendix and this year with Charles' food"Carlos agreed

The whole table erupted with the antics but Pierre is dying with curiosity already. Charles kept on mentioning how tonight is a really important night for him to announce something. He can't forget this dinner since its all that Charles has been talking about ever since they arrived in Australia.

"But in all honesty, you said you have something to tell us Charles" Pierre wondered "I'm dying to know"

Charles excused himself for a second and all the drivers on the table watched as he went to the kitchen. You were still in your chef's jacket when Charles spotted you.

"Is it time already? Do I look okay?"

"You look more than gorgeous mon amour"Charles replied, giving you a soft kiss to the cheeks.

The two of you walked out of the kitchen with hands interlaced with one another. The table suddenly fell quiet as they saw the two of you approaching the table. Charles has the most smug grin on his face.

"Everyone, I would like you to introduce the talented and amazing Chef for tonight Y/N" Charles lifted your intertwined hands "And she's also my girlfriend"

The drivers were all silent and shocked as they pieced out everything together. Then the flurry of questions started.

"Did you try Charles' pasta?" "Were you poisoned to say yes to him?" "How on earth did Charles get a MasterChef winner" "Can you teach me how you made the appetizer with the pea and corn"

It was so funny and you two were in a long night for explaining. But as you sat down bext to Charles, you felt at ease. You know that you can handle anything together.

The accidental reveal

Charles_Leclerc just posted a photo.

Charles_Leclerc We’ll do everything together to get as many of those trophies in the years to come

User1 Charles is a future WDC

User2 those trophies needs a little bit of polishing, don't you think?

User3 The dust that they have been collecting

User4 Leave the man alone, he's away from home 24/7

User5 is it just me or did you guys see the MasterChef trophy at the back

User6 isn't that the australian trophy, maybe its the p2 from last year User7 nooo! User5 is right, it has the logo

User8 SIR THAT TROPHY IN THE BACK ISN'T YOURS

landonorris lol since when did you have time to do a sidequest with masterchef while we race User10 LANDO! maxverstappen1 surprised he can hold himself till the end. CarlosSainz55 surprised he can cook Charles_Leclerc uninvited for dinner landonorris NOW WAIT A SECOND

Charles_Leclerc and Y/NCooks posted a photo.

Charles_Leclerc spot the game difference is getting difficult.

User1 Man really said fuck it!

User2 I can't believe this crossover

User3 If someone told me this happened a year ago, I would have laughed at you User4 There is no way Charles_Leclerc Why not, I have lots of redeeming qualities

User5 So you mean to say Charles Leclerc is the boyfriend she has been talking about in MasterChef. How did we not piece this out together?

User6 The adopted by the italian family. The cake after Charles P3 in Jeddah. The long distance relationship. THE LECLERC BROTHERS AS HER CLOSEST FRIENDS. HOW DID WE NOT SEE IT User7 I think its because we think Charles can't bag Y/N Charles_Leclerc you all underestimated me

User8 My new favorite trope, the woman who loves to cook for Gordon and the man who loves to get grilled by Gordon

User9 IM LAUGHING! Remember that tweet Charles_Leclerc I'll have you know that I have improved!

User12 Where can I get Y/N, she is so beautiful and talented

Charles_Leclerc sorry out of stock!!!!

User10 Im laughing at how Charles is fighting everyone in the comment section. He really said, he has time

Y/NCooks posted a photo

Y/NCooks the first two was taken two weeks into dating. We preferred staying indoors and the comforts of the house so we could have our privacy. Charles burned the fries and that's a photo of him insisting it was crispy not burnt // fast forward to two weeks ago when he insisted on cooking pasta and making pizza, it was pretty good. The pasta was actually al dente and the pizza was made from scratch.

Thank you honey for growing with me for the past 3 years. I love you all the way from Melbourne to Monaco (or whichever country you are in rn)

User1 This is so wholesome, I ship them together

User2 CHARLES CREMATED THE FRIES

User3 3 YEARS???? THAT MADE ME EVEN MORE SURPRISED

Gordongram FINALLY. The boyfriend is revealed. Hope I can taste some of your cooking Charles_Leclerc

Charles_Leclerc please have mercy on me Y/NCooks He cooks as much as he can so he can cook for you as a thanks for your tutorial lessons User5 GORDON TAUGHT CHARLES???? WHATTTT

User6 God I have seen what you have done for others

User7 I'm looking back at every post of Y/N about the boyfriend. I think I'm sleeping at the highway

User8 same, they are so lovely with each other

User9 Couple goals!

Charles_Leclerc I love you so much. But I thought you deleted that first date photo

Y/NCooks the internet is forever honeyyyyy User10 I love them so much

landonorris so now the cat is out of the bag, can you teach me how to cook now?

yukitsunoda0511 me tooooo! maxverstappen1 i wanna learn too Charles_Leclerc you're cooking maxverstappen1 ??? maxverstappen1 if you can cook, anyone can cook Charles_Leclerc you are always cooking during the races, let me have this maxverstappen1 no :)) landonorris I JUST WANT COOKING LESSONS!

[mister-tom-a-dildo-lover]

I think a certain amount of etiquette is lost on people in fandom nowadays.

Just in general, but specifically I'm focusing on Tomarry/Harrymort right now because it's relevant my present issue.

I follow Tomarry/Harrymort content on here and Twitter. I am not always active, and I'm not always reacting to every single thing I see. But I see a lot of things and I keep my mouth shut most of the time.

In these past couple of months on Twitter, it's become really annoying to witness this particular subset of the fandom because people make posts that are not-so-subtly shading Tomarry/Harrymort writers every day.

People are so obsessed with how much they love the character and how much they love fanfiction that is true to the character, where they sound just like their canon self and don't seem any different, that they spend their days tearing down depictions of Harry Potter in fanfiction, that dare to stray away from abused, snow-white-angel, Quidditch-obsessed jock.

Many people seem to have forgotten that in the actual story, Harry Potter and Lord Voldemort would not get together. We ship two crack ships. They are things that have no hope in hell of ever happening in the canon story. To even write for Tomarry/Harrymort, we either have to change a few details, leave out a few details, or try to rework the existence of some details so they hit differently and make the pairing make sense for each individual fic.

This fandom purity nonsense has ended up with a lot of recent posts dogging on different kinds of HP tropes over the years and affecting authors.

A few weeks bacl it was 'the era of creature fics was cringe'. And then it was followed by a long list describing certain scenarios in certain stories that used these tropes, and I could immediately pick out which fics inspired these descriptions. There were people in the replies and the quotes land people who took screenshots to post to their own accounts to say shady things(including naming fics specifically!) without others being able to easily access them from the OG post itself.

I, personally, have outgrown creature fics in HP, and I'm not interested in reading them anymore. But I'm not sitting here making lists attacking the tropes involved in them. I'm not sitting here saying that they were stupid and corny, and they were the most unHarry Potter-like writings ever. And I'm not the one out here making the people who wrote those stories and get to see these kinds of comments coming from people in their fandom, feel bad.

IDK, but when So-So sees people bringing their 6-year-old fic up in a post dragging tropes in Tomarry/Harrymort fics, and they suddenly get the urge to just delete their fics entirely and not bother with the fandom anymore... maybe y'all need to learn how to word things better. It's really not that hard to say you're not into a specific thing anymore without having to drag other people down.