#i originally kinda hated this piece when I first made it bc I was trying to capture the vastness(tm) of it and I didn’t feel like I was
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jeezlouiseoncheese · 4 months ago
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anyone want a random vast-themed art piece I did ages ago? no? good, because I don’t care and you’re getting it anyway.
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rollercoasterwords · 5 months ago
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hi rae how are uu!!!
i was reading about mulvey and the female gaze and i remembered you saying something about how it pushes bioessentialist agendas but i don't remember what u said exactly so do you mind sharing a piece of ur mind about this again
also!!!!! i've read captive prince with ur influence and then read ur laurent's pov rewrite and god!!!!! it was so so good it brought me to tears and made me laugh out loud and scream into my pillow at times... the first book didn't stick out to me that well but afterwards?? their dynamic is everything i was missing in life. also reading the first book in laurent's pov was an otherworldly experience, him getting surprised to see damien isn't the definition of all things evil like he thought ahhhh u captured him perfectly i think
also read all for the game series (saw a fanart of neil in ur blog and it kickstarted me getting into yet another fandom) and i was like wtf is this and then later i was like wtf is this but in a positive way. now the characters are all my babies (except kevin like yes i understand his struggles and all but i still see that guy as a little bitch which is a bit ironic when andreil are the biggest bitches to exist but still)
also binge-watched iwtv and goddddd gays with communication problems who happen to be vampires i love them all sm <333 do u have a fav character i wonder AND any thoughts on the last episode?
anyways i hope life is treating you kindly much kisses and good wishes <3
hi i'm good hope ur doing good as well!! such a fun message hang on let me take this piece by piece...
mulvey's male gaze the bane of my existence lmao...yeah the entire theory is rooted in bioessentialism. basically mulvey is basing her theory in freud who assumes that the categories 'father' 'mother' 'son' and 'daughter' are stable + static & therefore assumes that the categories 'male' and 'female' are stable + static biological categories which engender inherently different psychic/interior qualities. mulvey's entire argument hinges on the idea that men will be categorically unable to relate to/empathize with/see themselves as women onscreen--this argument begins to break down when you start asking questions like 'how is mulvey defining 'men' and 'women'? is she defining them, or is she assuming that they're static biological categories? are they static biological categories?' also i disagree with the idea that people are categorically unable to identify with characters across sex and/or gender & think it's kinda dumb tbh. to be fair, mulvey's theory was meant to apply to a pretty specific context and has largely been taken out of that context in ways that are very annoying but not necessarily her fault; still, when the original theory is so rooted in bioessentialism i don't really find any of it useful.
anyway. moving on to the fun stuff captive prince omg!! so glad u enjoyed the series & my own take on laurent...it was SO fun trying to get inside his head & imagine what would have been going on in there i love him so much <3 <3 tricky to write tho bc i was definitely trying 2 walk the line of like. not diminishing/excusing laurent's cruelty while simultaneously showing why he acts the way he does in the first book...abuse as cyclical etc...
and aftg lol such a trip...wtf is honestly an accurate response it's a wild ride but so much fun <3 & not liking kevin...valid honestly i like him but i also don't care abt him that much compared 2 the other characters...u should read 'the sunshine court' at some point it's abt jean & it will probably make u like kevin even less lmao
& finally. iwtv!!!!!!!! i've been obsessed w that show the past few weeks i just binge watched season 1 & have now been watching season 2...SO fucking good omg. personally my favorite character is. armand <3 idc what he does they could never make me hate him...last episode was soooo good claudia is my second-fave character just a smidge after armand i truly think her story is probably the most interesting + tragic out of all of them like. makes me feel a bit crazyinsane thinking abt it BUT her & madeleine. oh my goddddd that scene broke me. don't have many more coherent thoughts currently other than wailing + tearing my hair out etc but i am having a great time nonetheless...
anyway thank u 4 the message love catching up life has been busy but mostly treating me kindly hope it's doing the same for u!! <3
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swagglessmoth · 2 years ago
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I’m gonna mention a few fics by name that have me hooked (some of them I’m pretty sure that have been discontinued but if there’s no note from the author then I’ll keep waiting 🤞)
1. On the edge of seventeen by Scratchienails (obviously) [ao3]
When I saw that the third chapter came out I went so feral I couldn’t read it for a full 45 minutes. That’s all I’m gonna say, I have three other full posts dedicated to this fic
By the same author theres also “But the sea changes colours” it’s based around the same idea that Roger never died but Roger and Shanks steal baby Luffy from Garp and Dragon (it’s very funny but I think it’s been discontinued)
2. A boy with a scar by Syluk [ao3]
It’s a fic about Luffy having been taken as a slave when he was a child and how this affects the story. It has 33 chapters and counting and IT IS SO GOOD AA. Really love when authors take into account all the consequences the changes of the au would have in canon, I mean, like characters that haven’t met the main crew yet still doing things off frame. And the characterization is on point, I love that
3. Blackout / How to catch a Shikari / Brothers under the moon by rikuai12 [ao3/fanfiction]
THIS AUTHOR RAAAAA
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That’s all I’ll say
4. Maybe this is home by Lilian_lav [ao3]
At first I was kind of hesitant bc Luffy was kind of out of character and everyone hated him, but as the chapters went on the little cryptid fuck grew on me and so did on the other characters. It has 24 chapters and counting and it’s really fun how asl interact with the heart pirates (though I’m kind of only interested in luffy but that’s just bc I’m hyperfixating)
5. Beyond blood by Justcallmecookie [fanfiction]
This one has permanently marked me and I will never forget about it. It’s about Luffy running away from the government and trying to find Ace after they find out he is Dragon’s son and call on a buster call on Dawn island. Sadly it’s been discontinued but it’s still a really good plot, story and writing overall
Though there is this fic (Blood is thicker then water by ImHyperfixatingdontBotherMe [ao3]) that is inspired by this one and kind of taking their own spin on it. It’s still ongoing and I do recommend it even though it doesn’t have the same vive as the original
6. Colour the ocean red (to prove my love to you) by Epiphany_Of_SummerSunsets [ao3]
It’s super cute with mer teen Shanks and little Luffy, I love their interactions and with there were more fics about them. I also like the mystery with the murders going around and the fact that they made Rouge Garps daughter. Really in love with the whole Monkey D. Gol D. family with asl + Buggy
7. Luffy is Lost in The MHA/BNHA world, but he gets taken in by the Yaoyorozu's and attends school by AndreiStrambeanu [ao3]
…listen, hear me out..
Okay the title is pretty self explanatory and it may not be everyone’s cup of tea but I was bored and it was entertaining. The writing is kinda ass sometimes and there are a lot of plotholes (of which the author is concious about and doesn’t give any fucks) but it IS the author’s first fic (at least published on ao3) so I’ll give them the pass. It is meant to entertain not be a magnum opus, and it does it’s purpose. It is also still ongoing so I’ll take whatever I can
8. Almost giving up before we’ve even started by Leohanan [ao3]
THIS ONE OMG 💞💞
Incredible piece of literature, I loved every second of it. Rouge adopting asl is the best plot and idea ever and I love it. AND ITS COMPLETE 10/10 would read again
8. Tempus Edax Rerum (I think that’s how it’s spelled) by appl_juice [ao3]
Really cute with little Shanks time traveling and ending up with the strawhats, it only has 4 chapters and unfortunately I think it has been discontinued but it had a really good plot and didn’t feel ooc which adds extra points
9. Oden’s eldest by Alexiledit [ao3]
I’ll be careful with this one cause I know the author is on tumblr
I really like it, but not for the fic itself unfortunately, but for the posts about it they have on their tumblr (which expand much more on the au). The fic has one chapter and I think it’s been discontinued, the writing isn’t magnificent but I like the plot. I’ve actually made several pieces of fanart bc this au stuck to my brain and refused to let go for some time. I have a bad habit of taking characters I love and putting them in already existent family dynamics with characters that have nothing to do with them, so I see why I loved this au so much
There are others like Old truths by GreaterAwareness [ao3] Flashy brotherhood by Airuna [ao3] and Tomorrow before yesterday beguins by Staryty [ao3] (this one I’m still halfway though) which have amazing plots and writing but I got kind of bored (I think bc they focused more on Ace or other characters other than Luffy and I exclusively read Luffy centric fics) but they are amazing anyway and should still be acknowledged like the rest.
This is not a tier list, I’m not ranking them in any order whatsoever. I just like ranting
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incorrect-web-novels · 1 year ago
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Aforementioned long and not-that-cohearant rant under the cut
(major spoilers up to around Chapter 500)
Eleris’s comment is actually really interesting in how it sets up Sarkegaar as almost an antagonist, further supported by his desire to kill Ellen when he first realizes she’s the hero’s sister and Reinhardt’s friend. However, it’s such a strange comment in hindsight when we know Eleris’ past as an Archdemon & the extent of Sarkegaar’s loyalty. Archdemons, in general, are compared to be more of a God than a king. Eleris herself says-
“The existence of a Demon King in Darkland is absolute. If a human king did such things, rebellion would soon arise, but no demon could even muster the will to resist the injustice and tyranny originating from me” (Ch.426)
- and Sarkegaar agrees not to kill Ellen when Reinhardt orders him to drop it with no real reason. He hates humans and is more than willing to take revenge on them, especially to save Reinhardt via the Akasha in chapter 438, but it’s also almost a continuation of her trying to convince Reinhardt not to rebuild the Darklands and contains her own bias against Sarkegaar who wants to do so.
Sarkegaar, in my opinion, is more about protecting demons and their interest, which does include revenge, but is willing to follow Reinhardt through almost anything. Both Eleris and Reinhardt seem to consistently underestimate his loyalty to Reinhardt.
��Your Highness, for your sake, I would even go though the pits of hell. You can order anything of me.”
- Sarkegaar, Chapter 268
“Please keep this in mind. I am not loyal to you for being an Archdemon…Since the time you made the decision to rescue the demon prisoners held by humans, everything from the furthest strand of my hair to the last piece of my soul has belonged to my lord.”
- Sarkegaar, Ch.262
And, like, nothing Eleris is inherently wrong from when it was said (Reinhardt hadn’t even met Sarkegaar yet, and there’s no point where he explicitly told Sarkegaar he wasn’t planning to rebuild the Darklands), but it feels wrong once you’ve read more of the story, if that makes sense? It makes sense for Eleris to word it low-key maliciously, but it changes the entire vibe of Reinhardt and Sarkegaar’s relationship to an arguably necessary one of paranoia and secrecy.
IDK I just think it’s interesting how the core aspects of Sarkegaar’s character didn’t change that much, but there was a shift from nearly antagonistic/a secret danger -> him being the MC’s most loyal servant (which was kinda always true in a way). I don’t even know if it can be called a misunderstanding or character development bc it’s hard to tell how Sarkegaar would react to Reinhardt being unwilling to rebuild the Darklands or how much he trusted him before he saved the demon prisoners. The author is just very good at writing characters who care and trust one another but goes against the other’s wishes (mainly Reinhardt’s tbh) bc of core elements of their character and highly differing ideologies.
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Sarkegaar, Chapters 14 & 438 vs. Ch.471 & 519
Fascinated with whatever character arc Sarkegaar is having in the background & others perceptions of him
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elvesofnoldor · 5 years ago
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i still love maedhros and maglor but these days i gotta say, celebrimbor gotta be my favourite feanorian.....i hate that there is like three different versions of his origin because he was conceived as as lord of the rings backstory character that tolkien tried to shoehorned into the house of feanor and the first age, and i really hate that we saw his door at moria in lotr and even though it’s this beautiful remanent of the friendship and love between (noldor) elves and dwarves that blossomed under his rule at Eregion, tolkien just didnt seem to think that feat mattered a lot......but i fucking love him ok! he was the character that connects the legacy of Eldar days/first age to the more recent days that took place during lotr, he was so fucking important ok. he was the one who expanded on the alliance his house had with dwarves for centuries and turned that mere alliance into friendship and love because of noldors and dwarves’ shared passion in crafts and invention! his close friend was dwarf! probably his closest friend tbh! legolas isnt fucking special ok and legolas wasnt even an artificer! And more importantly! my tyelpe! he was brave! Despite having made the mistakes of trusting sauron enough to learn from him, he still did what he can to save his people from becoming enslaved to sauron’s will and gave everybody else (men and dwarves) a chance--however slim that chance was! (sure he was forced to give up the locations of rings that sauron gave to men and dwarves, but only under torture which he died from! not to mention im pretty sure with the one ring sauron could find the lesser rings on his own anyways, celebrimbor saved his fellow elves from becoming thralls to sauron and that alone gave everybody a fucking chance at survival and freedom). surely his story with sauron would have echoed somewhat with feanor’s story with melkor, and he has indeed made grieve mistakes in his pursue of knowledge and out of his desire to do good with power, but he was only...a person! (yeah “only human” doesnt work here but whatever). To me however, he has redeemed his house from their past sins and transgressions against their own people. Surely it sucks that the curse of his house took his life in such a gruesome fashion, but to me, whatever grief or hurt his house inflicted upon their people through the kinslayings, he cleaned them away with his own blood. And in life, he only furthered the good his house has done in the past. I like to think his story is that of tragedy, redemption, hope and friendship, and he’s a fucking hero of his own right.
#yolanda talks#drinking loving tyelpe juice.....#i just cross-referenced three different origins to make a coherent origin story for celebrimbor and explain his whereabout in the first age#and now i have emotions and also i wanna draw this origin story into a comic. im always wanting to do things outside my skill set these days#no crush on galadriel. he just respected her a lot. no romance. but he was 10 when finrod dies and he was fond of finrod#in this origin story i pieced together for him lol thats a headcanon. also he witnessed his dad and uncle repeating the oath#which scared him. bc the power they evoked with the words. and finrod's death and their part in it made him more scared of them#and thats why he refused to go with curufin and celegorm in exile. and if not for the followers of their house standing with him#curufin would have forced him to go with them. its only later that celebrimbor understood his family is doomed to this oath of vengeance#also he was literally 1 when the battle of sudden flame happened#and while celegorm and curufin were evacuating from their domain with their people. and denied refugee at doriath. his mother died#along with his maternal grandfather. and curufin. in grief. never mentioned the mother-name his mother might have given him#so like. curufin'd have a grudge against Doriath for denying he and his people much needed refugee anyways#but this headcanon just exacerbate the wound? i dont think it excuses curufin's misguided hate cause thats the last thing i want tho#Celegorm too was bitter and also hes a lil demon and he wanted to take vengeanceupon Doriath while forcing them into alliance#but also curufin. lost in grief over the loss of family member and let the misguided hate drove him to dishonourable actions and in turn#losing one of the last treasure family member he still had. echoed with feanor's story too.#and celebrimbor losing mother when he's 1 kinda echoed with feanor's story. so. like im trying to make things neat here#anyways what i like the most abt my headcanon is after fall of both nagarthrond and gondolin. celebrimbor went to to the dwarves#im sorry but celebrimbor was said to have 'a dwarvish' obsession with crafts. how the hell did this elf-smith get dwarvish?!#he was a feanorian. he wouldnt be trusted in havens. with elwing hanging out with silmaril on display. even tho he swore no oath#not finding enough acceptance with his own people. naturally he turned to his family's allies who shared his interest?#i think he lived with dwarves of khaz-dum/moria until war of wrath is over and narvi and him become friends during this time#i think this image of tyelpe living with dwarves is so fairytale and sweet. it's like snow white and 7 dwarves lmao. but he isnt pale.#(in my headcanon he isnt!)#man it sucks that i dont have a lot of celebrimbor content on my blog but i will definitely make some#when i get around drawing him and hopefully made good drawings of him....which...hopefully can happen sooner
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iwannawritelots · 2 years ago
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Obey Me! Babes Watching MC Play Little Nightmares 1 & 2
Originally written July 2022
Finally finished this I’ve been working on it for like two weeks -3-
spoilers in Beel’s part
Lucifer💙
he thinks the art style is fascinating, but not really his favorite
assuming you made him wear the headphones (because that’s the best way to experience it), he really appreciates the sound design and music
trying so hard to not admit it’s intrigued him lol
Mammon💛
scared baby
“N-No! I ain’t scared!” proceeds to shriek
hugging your arm the whole time
he does think the visuals are cool, but he’s very scared and can’t think about it too much haha
Leviathan🧡
SO EXCITED!! Gaming time!!!
likes theorizing about the story with you as you go along! Will definitely want to look at threads online later
yelps and laughs a lot
if you end up letting him control it for a bit, critiques the first game’s lack of pathway correction (you can easily fall off of things in the first game haha) and gets super excited when it’s fixed in the second
Satan💚
never even flinches the whole time
like Levi, likes trying to piece together the story. Detective Satan mode
likes how creepy it is
Asmodeus💘
jumpy baby lol. Screams a couple of times dhsodjdk
trying to study the art style as you go haha
don’t be surprised if you find him doodling the nomes afterwards! (Don’t tell Levi or he’ll get embarrassed)
even though he’s not nearly as afraid as Mammon, he’ll definitely use the games being horror as an excuse to be close to you (so long as you’re okay with it of course)
mostly a bit nervous that he will somehow end up with an appearance similar to some of the creatures in the game haha.
Also hates the ink leech creatures! Why!?
Beelzebub❤️
he’s not very vocal about the few times he gets startled. He just kinda freezes for a second haha
asks a lot of questions
sympathizes with Six’s monstrous hunger
only a bit horrified when Six eats the nome ;-;
Belphegor💜
trying so hard to stay awake. The scary parts help a bit haha
ends up napping in your lap, but if you really wanted him to see the whole thing he’ll watch as many times as you want
Lord Diavolo❣️
GAME TIME!!!
the few times he’s startled, he just giggles shskshdkdbd cute…
Thinks it’s so interesting!! Keeps wondering what will happen next >:3
Barbatos🖤
oh goodness would Barbatos even be able to stomach the first game??? So many rats…
maybe just show him the second one. He’ll enjoy spending time with you.
not really afraid of the second one because of the lack of rats (unless I’m misremembering but I’ve played through both games more than a few times shsodjdk)
Simeon🤍
if you want it to be even more scary for him, let him be in control instead haha
very jumpy and squeaks once or twice dhskdhdkd
another one who tries to analyze the story the whole time haha
Solomon🤎
somehow I feel like nothing even phases him enough that he outwardly expresses it
he’s probably supposed to be king Solomon who like… y’know…
but still enjoys spending time with you hehe
Mephistopheles💟
jumpy but refuses to admit it pfff
If you let him control it he’s a little flustered but will insist he can do it bc he’s a prideful little shit
Raphael💔
mostly flinches when something scares him, maybe squeaks once
not all that afraid/he’s pretty numb to it since he’s a hitman
probably thinking about the weird clothing and monsters because seamstress baby
Thirteen❤️‍🩹
probably super enjoys it shskdhdkd
ough maybe just let her play and swear it out >w<
lets you snuggle her while one of you is controlling it
(I literally have to blorbo her to think of anything they did her dirty in season four *sobs*)
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imagine-your-love-story · 3 years ago
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Random but I saw a post about self inserts. To bottle it down "why???? (/gen) self-inserting doesn't adds to the narrative???" - which wasn't malicious but damn it rubbed me the wrong way and I annoyed D: 1) Bold assumption I am not a foil to my f/o, thematically relevant to themes and/or overall my addition isn't crucial to what I am making (adding me literally change the whole genre of the source material into slice-of-life-comedy, in a way original cast couldn't be used bc I am methaphorically a clown unlished into a serious buisness meeting and that's why it works DFDFG) 2) Bold assumption narrative concerns me at all in the first place- In my case the goal is romantic feelings, affection and comfort. I cannot use any canon x canon to sumplement this bc I am highly apathetic with low empathy (my autism thing). Not like I feel myself ever represented by canon characters in *anything* anyway :| ALSO I've been also involuntarily socialy isolated from ppl for over 10 years (not going to end anytime soon either), the only ppl I have around is my neglectful mom and cat. And that's it. I live in a forest in the middle of nowhere. Not even neighbours. Our car broken down some time ago. Only mail gets here. One might only imagine how isolation and routine so extreme can fuck up a human, an extremely social being with social needs. I'm literally trying to keep myself sane here, narrative be damned- X'D 3) Also bold assumption that I like the rest of the cast of [source material], I want them to begone actually DFGF 4) Also I simply prefer to interact that way with media. It's fun to me. The same way I have a friend who hates anything self-inserty and always has to have a full-made protag (= not a fan of RPGs). And that should be all the explanation needed really :v
But sure, (gonna be salty 4 a sec) what a self-insert brings to *THE* narrative- since narrative must be upheld so highly and is (paraphrazing) "already complete with the original cast" :/ Honestly the assumption of ppl's s/is irrelevance here is somehow the most annoying. I've been through some bs alright. And I have some valuable things to say about it. I just don't want to do it by proxy of canon chara :/ And other ppl have complicated, deep inner lives (it feels insulting to imply otherwise ngl) so I assume same goes for others. And some ppl don't care at all bc they're just powerful and vibin' like that B) DFDF
(a me: @nekociapek / @ladynyat)
WHAT THE - 
WHY would someone say that???? That’s ridiculous!! -_- I don’t understand why people post sh!t like that. Even if it’s not really malicious, it’s still kinda negative and they can just...not say anything! There’s PLENTY of stuff in fandom(s) that I don’t understand and/or like, but I don’t waste my time on it. I move on and focus on what I enjoy instead!
Anyway - mini rant over
....ACTUALLY I’M NOT DONE 😡
1. There is literally NO requirement that our interaction with media of any kind MUST add to the narrative! That’s like saying, “A hobby is a waste of time unless you’re making money at it.” (BIG NO) That makes it sound like if we have any interaction with media, it’s our DUTY to add to the narrative.
Heck no it’s not!
2. The ENTIRE point of storytelling is to make us think. To find a piece of ourselves in the narrative. So OF COURSE self-shipping DOES add to the narrative in some way! We’re literally inserting ourselves into the narrative and interacting with it, just like EVERY person does when they listen to/watch/read a story! As soon as we consume the story and expose ourselves to it, we’re interacting with it!
3. It doesn’t matter if it adds to the narrative or not.  It doesn’t HAVE to add to the narrative. Self-shipping is literally not for anyone else except yourself. No, we’re not out here writing 100k AUs for some rando to read free (and then sh!t all over because “it’s not true to canon” or whatever 😒 ) Self-shipping is FOR YOU. Not anyone else. So it automatically adds to YOUR interpretation of the narrative!
4. Like you mentioned, canon often misses entire demographics. People aren’t seeing themselves represented in fiction so it’s THAT MUCH MORE IMPORTANT for EVERYONE to explore stories with a vision of themselves in mind in order to spread awareness and educate people.
I can’t tell your story. I haven’t lived your life. Likewise, you can’t tell my story because I’m the only one who has lived it. I know all the details of my story and you know all the details of your story.
Canon isn’t sacred ground that must remained untouched. At one time, it was just an idea, like the myriad of ideas rolling around in your head. Yes, the canon material managed to make it to a larger platform, i.e. Netflix, Hollywood, etc. But that really doesn’t make it any better than anyone else’s ideas. Mainstream media has had a LONG run of spreading narratives that are harmful - i.e. racism, fat shaming, etc. So it’s a damn good thing to NOT add to the narrative in some cases! :P
You have so many excellent points, lovely, and I’m so glad you shared your ask with me!! ♥♥♥ Fiction has provided understanding, acceptance, and some form of escape for centuries. Just one look at the oldest cave paintings in the world and you’ll see early artists painted hunters, LIKE THEMSELVES, into powerful stories of hunting bison and deer.
Fiction provides us sanctuary. It gives us a voice in this big world to say (and hear!) “You are not alone.”
Whether someone wants to interact with stories through self-inserts, original characters, RPGs, you name it - it’s all a celebration of storytelling! ♥
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radramblog · 4 years ago
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What happened to Dirk in Homestuck^2?
Why am I doing this to myself.
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I memed a little yesterday when I was posting that article around social medias about Homestuck jokes, because once again we are in lockdown and I am therefore Stuck at Home. Canned laughter goes here. But there’s a topic related to the comic- or more specifically, its aborted sequel, Homestuck^2, that I’m interested in delving into a little bit. I’m going to avoid talking about spoilers as much as possible, but considering said comic takes place not only after the events of the massive sprawl that is Homestuck but also the more linear but still messy Epilogues, some amount of sus shit is inevitable.
Anyway. Much maligned is what the Epilogues and 2 did to everyone’s favourite decapitation target, Dirk Strider, and I have a theory as to why it happened this way.
To begin with, let’s summarise what and who Dirk is through the course of the comics. Fair warning from me, though, it’s been a while since I read through this.
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Dirk Strider is a teenager who grew up in a post-apocalyptic future Earth, completely devoid of physical contact with other people and only really ever gets to talk to 3 other people, only one of whom is in anything remotely resembling a relatable situation. He struggles with self-identity, having created numerous robots including an artificial intelligence based on his own brain, aka Lil’ Hal. He’s somewhat of a control freak, and a bit of a cold aloof asshole, but means well, and is pretty gay. NBD. The kinda guy to set up a plan meticulously and thoroughly, not informing any of the moving parts even if said parts are his friends, and often involving some form of self-sacrifice.
Throughout the comic he further reckons with self-identity problems and his own self-loathing including entering a relationship with Jake which doesn’t go well and he eventually breaks off since he knows his overbearing and manipulative behaviour is Not Cool and Pretty Toxic but doesn’t know how to shut it off. Eventually he reaches the God Tier as a Prince of Heart, gaining the power to literally annihilate souls, which he never actually uses since he gets yeeted into deep (Paradox) space and then everything goes to shit. Except none of that happens because of the Retcon (aside from the God Tier bit) and we don’t actually see how that shit progressed in the canon timeline. I think. Dirk’s arc, as it were, doesn’t really come full circle- while he does assist in Dave’s character…growth? he really isn’t the focus of that conversation. This immediately precedes the action climax and there isn’t literally any dialogue after that so that’s what we’re left with.
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I like Dirk in Homestuck a lot. It’s hard not to, considering the flashes heavily featuring him (Unite/Synchronise and Prince of Heart: Rise Up) are genuinely excellent, along with many of his music themes being absolute bangers. He gets to interact with Caliborn a lot, with a pretty great banter, there, and the whole splintered personality thing is a really interesting hook for a character. I think he’s my favourite of the Alpha kids, a controversial pick considering I know everyone loves Roxy so much. I think, I’m not as in tune with the fandom as that statement implies I am.
And then the Epilogues/Homestuck 2 came.
Now I read the Meat half of the epilogues first, but that’s more interesting, so we’ll tackle Candy first (this is going to get real confusing for those who haven’t read this comic, huh).
In Candy, Dirk almost immediately kills himself, citing the irrelevance of the timeline as cause, an act considered by whatever mechanism governs God Tier deaths to be Just because he hates himself (and also bc of things we’ll get into), so it actually sticks. This isn’t super relevant for the discussion, but that’s just kinda so unbelievably fucked up? Entirely? I’d imagine if you read Candy first you might get entirely turned off by this, which I’m sure a lot of people did.
Meat is where the, well, meat of post-canon Dirk is. You see, a concept very quickly introduced in the tail end of the original comic is the Ultimate Self, an idea where you somehow encompass every different timeline iteration or alternate version of yourself. This was pretty clearly tacked on to make it so characters whose arcs all happened in the retcon timeline could have their not getting an actual arc explained away, but it didn’t land then and it sure doesn’t land for me now. Anyway, in Meat, Dirk becomes his ultimate self, making him near-omniscient and able to control the fabric of the story himself- for much of this story, he is the narrator. And he uses this power to fuck with all his friends really distressingly without their knowledge (or consent), including breaking up a marriage, in order to further his own goals which largely appear to be just keep the story going so to not fade out of relevance. It’s a plot that makes no sense with his previous characterisation, but I guess now that he’s the Ultimate Self he’s a different person? But I liked old Dirk, and I don’t like New Dirk. He’s a villain now, but he made a much better anti-hero.
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But this would be fine if he (or the epilogues, or Homestuck^2) were written well. But they aren’t. Dirk’s dialogue is long, painfully drawn out, with tangents that tend to amount to pure wank, misused literary references and pointless metaphors that go on and on, filling the screen with a bright orange screed that hurts to look at as much as it does to comprehend. It’s not fun. And we’ve seen Dirk communicate before, obviously, the story of Homestuck is built around chatlogs, but it wasn’t like this. He was sarcastic, dryly witty, blunt at times. Even when he was literally talking to a different version of himself it didn’t get that masturbatory.
I was so confused about what the hell happened to Dirk, because I had no idea what the hell someone writing this character was thinking when they turned him into this. And then, the 21st page of Homestuck^2 dropped.
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And it all came together.
What Ultimate Dirk and Terezi are referring to is Pony Pals: Detective Pony, a children’s book about some girls who hang out with ponies and solve a mystery. It’s a real book, buy it for your 5-year-old.
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Except they’re not referring to that, they’re referring to the Homestuck Canon version of Detective Pony- a birthday gift from Dirk to Jane, heavily edited and to be much more obscene and eventually developing into it’s own story, stated to be “tough, emotionally draining, but cathartic in all the worst ways possible”.
Except the quote “Remember Longcat, Jane?” and references to philosophy, dead languages, and ancient earth culture aren’t referring to the three pages of the Dirk-edited Detective Pony we see in the actual comic itself. That quote doesn’t appear there.
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That image is from Detective Pony, by Sonnetstuck- the 40,000 word fanfiction from 2014 that serves as a completed version of Jane’s copy of the book. An expansion of what we see in canon. And it’s a tough, emotionally draining read, but cathartic in all the worst ways possible.
It’s a very good fanfiction.
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In the later bits of Detective Pony, we can start to see the origins of what would become Ultimate Dirk’s signature style of writing. Long blocks of rambling text, orange dripping down the page, references to philosophy and history and language that go on and on. And it probably does look familiar to those who read the Epilogues and ^2. 
But there are a couple of key differences here. First of all, it’s just better written? The way these rambles circle back on themselves is so excellent, the absolute absurdity of this being written on top of a pony book for little girls, the humour (beyond some of the more immature stuff), it’s just a really well-written piece of fiction. Hell, you don’t even need to be familiar with the character of Dirk to enjoy it. It’s a harrowing piece, but it’s also self-aware- because it’s not supposed to be tough, draining, cathartic etc. just for Jane- it’s clearly that for Dirk himself.
The second part is, of course, that this is a fanfiction. It’s not canon, it’s not official, this is by someone who really likes Dirk for people who really like Dirk. It doesn’t matter in the grand scheme of things, so if you bounce off it (and I’m sure a lot did), then you don’t have to keep reading it, it’s fine, thanks for playing. As much as Homestuck^2 tried to doll itself up as “dubiously canon” it’s still the official continuation of the story, and that means if it’s as difficult to get into as Detective Pony, that’s going to be a problem for a lot of people.
The other part of it is that Detective Pony’s exploration of Dirk’s character is, well, in character. When the man himself steps in as a character in his own book, the explorations of what he is as an author, who he is as a person, make perfect sense for what we see of him at the start of the comic. He is that manipulative, blunt person, and he is aware of his faults. He’s the kind of person to hide a lamentation on his own failings inside an impenetrable maze of a story layered on top of a book about fucking ponies. Ultimate Dirk does not act like Dirk, outside of the “manipulator” angle, something that Dirk was aware of and trying to improve in the comic. But I guess people don’t have arcs, right?
It’s so interesting to see the seeds of Homestuck^2 laden within Detective Pony- because the meta angle that and the epilogues take is also represented in said fanfiction. While the nature of canon is a facet of the work, the idea of authors and narrators fighting for control of a story, different ideas in mind for the characters, one being more personally connected to them than the other, it’s all there. When I wrote about Fallout 4 in the past, I mentioned being worried that Bethesda took the wrong lessons from Skyrim- seeing something successful and trying to recapture that lightning in a bottle. I think Homestuck^2 is an extreme example of this- the writers of the comic saw Sonnetstuck’s masterwork and thought, yeah that’s great, we can do that. But they just can’t. And with the comic crashed and burning, the probably won’t ever get a chance to. Dirk is forever stuck as this amalgamation of himself that looks nothing like any individual version of him ever did.
At least we will still have Detective Pony, and many other excellent fanworks, for actually good Dirk content. I admittedly haven’t looked into much fanfic written during/post-epilogues, and I’m kind of afraid of what I’ll see- I can only hope the fanbase didn’t take the same wrong lessons as the official team did.
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kaaytea · 4 years ago
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You made a post of Miyuki dating coach Kataoka’s daughter and can you make some hc’s of everyone’s reaction to them dating
Oooo ok I'm gonna try my best to include everyone...forgive me if I don't. Also, I wrote for some of the new first years but their's is more of how they would act around Kataoka's daughter
OG post is here incase anyone missed it KDAU Navi
Third years
Ok so
It's already been established in the OG post that the third years love Kataoka's daughter and are very protective of her
So a select few are like >:( "if you even make her sneeze weird I'll rip you to pieces"
Cough Jun and Ryo cough
I feel like all of them would warn Miyuki to be carful with her
Some are just more audible about it
I feel like they would find out during practice? Like Miyuki kisses her cheek after she helps him with his catchers gear
They all kinda just look at them and go silent
Like it takes a few moments for them to process what just happened
Then Jun starts yelling and freaking out
I feel like out of everyone Chris and Tetsu are the ones most likely to congratulate the two maybe Masuko as well (but Tetsuya would definitely nod along to Jun's rant about how he's gonna kick Miyuki's ass)
Second years
Ok so!!
Kuramochi
The relationship is old news for him 🙄 he figured the two of them out a few weeks into their whole secret relationship thing
He just literally never told anyone
Zono's brain is absolutely boggled by the news
Mans is just so confused and doesn't know what's going on
Nori and Shirasu probably wouldn't react much to it
Their under the impression that what Miyuki does isn't their business so they kinda stay out of the whole thing
BUT!
I lOve when Nori is sassy and I can see him teasing Miyooks on the rare occasion
Like say Miyuki arrives to practice a bit late Nori would look him dead in the eyes and just
"you know arriving to practice late with your girlfriend can give people the wrong idea"
First years
GOD I LOVE FURUYA
He's so awkward 😭
Following what I said in the original post he finds them making out in the bullpen
I kinda envisioned him walking in and just 🧍🏻‍♂️
He's blushing and and says "sorry I interrupted......I won't tell anyone"
THEN JUST LEAVES!! AND DOESN'T MENTION THE ENCOUNTER EVER AGAIN
Sawamura is probably screaming about it
Like baby is in complete disbelief that Miyuki Kazuya could get someone to like him romantically
He deadass would ask Kataoka's daughter if Miyuki was manipulating or blackmailing her 😭
Haruichi would just pull Eijun away and mutter a quiet ignore him/congrats
New first years
I honestly think the first years would find Miyuki a bit intimidating
Like he's the Captain, Catcher, Clean up, AND dating the coaches daughter?!
If that's not a power move 😶
Sweet angel Yui would be very respectful 🥰 bc not only is she his senpai, she's directly tied to his captain and the coach
Yui would be the person who always offers to help her clean up or carry heavy things
Okumura is kinda like Eijun where he's like how tf did Miyuki manage to convince the coaches daughter to like him??
Ok Asada is terrified to talk to the coaches daughter bc he doesn't wanna accidentally say something that could upset her bc he thinks Miyuki would hate him and Kataoka would kick him off the team 😭
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Text
Fic Writer Questions! (you can find me here on AO3 if you're interested!)
tagged by dear @theburialofstrawberries mwah!
1) How many works do you have on AO3?
112 yowza!
2) What’s your total AO3 word count?
750,421 kinda tempted to go delete one word so it can be 750420 which is a far more Pleasing number
3) How many fandoms have you written for and what are they?
12ish but some of them overlap: BBCS/Sherlock Holmes/ACD (these are all different bc my bbcs fics are not the same as my own modern fem Sherlock Holmes adaptation are not the same as my ACD Holmes fic; Good Omens; Harry Potter/The Werewolf Draco Malfoy Cinematic Universe; Captive Prince; The Hobbit; Fleabag (it was a crossover with BBCS but Fleabag is the perspective character so it still counts as a separate fandom imo); Doctor Who; The Office; Parks and Rec; Broad City (one a piece for those last 5 but I AM going to write a Parks and Rec polycule fic for @gaykagome)
4) What are your top 5 fics by kudos?
They're all Good Omens fics from the 2019 Summer of Good Omens! Susceptible to Summer, Fragments Shored Against My Ruin, Something So Magic, Enter Serpent, and Anything We Like
All of those have over 2k except the last one, but average engagement for me is like 400 kudos or so
5) Do you respond to comments, why or why not?
I try! It depends on what's going on with me. Sometimes I just don't have the energy, and I figure people would rather I spend my brain power on writing new fics than on writing replies to comments. Wish I had a fave button tho so I could let people know I read and reread comments, because I do!
6) What’s the fic you’ve written with the angstiest ending?
Oh I wrote this ficlet series called A Chemical Defect about John and Sherlock's relationship in s3 of BBCS, and it's WILDLY unpopular. People don't read my fic to cry sad tears I guess! John and Sherlock are having an affair in the story, and it ends with the implication that their relationship is unsustainable and that Mary knows about it anyway. I intended to come back to it after s4 and write a more optimistic ending but LOL! Didn't have the heart.
7) What’s the fic you’ve written with the happiest ending?
I know this answer is kinda up my own ass, but like. I think stories that feel true to life sort of feel like they end on a beginning if you know what I mean? You don't really consider a chapter of your life closed until you look back on it from the next? SO that said, I think I'd have to say that it's my big BBCS serial The Only One in the World. I spent 2 years writing it, and it ends with John retiring from medicine to solve crimes and write books full time.
Could also be my WDMCU (werewolf Draco Malfoy cinematic universe) series Moonrise, which starts with Draco isolated in his abusive mother's house, trying to cope with lycanthropy essentially alone and ends with him in love and surrounded by found family in a cozy cottage in Hogsmeade, having gotten some lycanthrope rights legislation passed after working at it for years and talking to Harry about whether they want to have kids. Oh man I feel warm and fuzzy just thinking about it
8) Do you write crossovers? If so what is the craziest one you’ve written?
I have written one crossover. It's BBCS/Fleabag, because me and @loudest-subtext-in-tv were laughing about how John seems like one of the horrible guys Fleabag sleeps with basically out of self loathing, so I wrote this fic to make Nattie laugh, and you should read it bc it's so good and so underrated.
9) Have you ever received hate on a fic?
Not really, but people don't seem to know that authors can read bookmark tags unless you private the bookmark, and someone once put in the bookmark tag on one of my fics 'writing was meh but it was okay.' Okay so why bookmark it then??
10) Do you write smut? If so what kind?
Fuck yes! I'm not sure what 'what kind?' means? People fucking? Sloppy, silly, and awkward, with lots of laughing. I also really like writing afterglow scenes which are even sillier and gigglier and often involve one character cooking for another. Food as love language is a very distinct pattern of mine tbh
11) Have you ever had a fic stolen?
Not that I'm aware of, but occasionally I'll write a post on here where I make some elaborate head canon, and I'll see people in the tags talking about how they want to write fic of it, and it makes me breathe fire out of my nose like a dragon like PLEASE DON'T. The WDMCU came out of a ficlet post I made on here like a year before I actually wrote the 60k series so like!!! Please don't do that!
12) Have you ever had a fic translated?
Yes! To Russian and I believe Chinese. Not my entire oeuvre but a handful of BBCS and Good Omens fics
13) Have you ever co-written a fic before?
No, but I wrote a fic inspired by an RP I did with my gf right around when we met (actually now that I think about it, it's two fics), and I waaaaaaanna do a WDMCU collab with my beloved Sally @clytemenestras at some point if he has time bc he inspired me to even write werewolf draco with his original lesbian werewolf story
14) What’s your all time favorite ship?
favorites are hard for me? I always think I'm currently doing my best writing lol so I'll say drarry
15) What’s a WIP that you want to finish but don’t think you ever will?
I don't post fics unless theyre finished, so I don't have any WIP up on AO3, but I did intend to continue with my fem Sherlock Holmes series, Your Many Tendencies. I just haven't been in a Holmes mood for a long time. Maybe I'll come back to it idk. This particular series is honestly very unpopular? People will just straight up say they don't read femslash, and it hurts a lot. This series feels really personal too, bc it's about a Black autistic nonbinary lesbian, so it does hurt my feelings that no one seems to care, yknow? I mean the people who read it are extremely kind and thoughtful in their engagement with it, but it has vastly less engagement than my m/m fic, and that's painful. It gets literally 1/10 the attention my fics usually get.
16) What are your writing strengths?
Almost all of my writing is romance, but I tend to write concurrently about recovery and found family, and I think I'm very good at doing that in a way that connects with my audience. I once had someone ask if they could use my words in their wedding vows, and I've had people tell me they started doing things with their spouse that my characters do with their partners in order to express love. I think about that all the time. My Impact. It makes me feel like I have a real duty to my audience yknow?
17) What are your writing weaknesses?
This question is hard for me like I've been writing so long and so much that I'm literally always happy with my final draft! It's always exactly to my taste, yknow? I suppose I could say that my fics tend not to be terribly plotty but so WHAT? That's beside the fuckn point for me. Plot who? I don't know Her. Also honestly like. Stories feel more True to me when they aren't ruthlessly devoted to plot bc like life isn't like that yknow?
18) What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic?
If you're not fluent in that language, get a beta who is!!!!! That said, I have written scraps of very simple dialogue in French using mostly Google Translate (sometimes I check w Sally bc he speaks French but I am usually too impatient), and I am perfectly well aware that I take my life in my hands each time!!! Also don't do that bullshit thing where it's in italics? That shit is weird and exoticizing. Just write it in quotation marks like normal dialogue.
19) What was the first fandom you wrote for?
BBCS babey back in 2012. Ended a 5 year dry spell for me after I got my writing degree.
20) What’s your favorite fic you’ve written?
Hmmmm I think it's probably gonna be the fic I'm working on now that I haven't posted yet, but I know it's called Names for a House, and here's a tiny bit of it
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Thanks again Shreya for asking me to do this bc I really love talking about myself. I tag @the-moon-loves-the-sea, @clytemenestras, @tomiano, @gaykagome and @totallysilvergirl
No pressure <3
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jiminrings · 4 years ago
Note
honestly i could talk w band!hobi abt numbers all day, like i wouldn't even mind. what are ur thoughts on 27 hobi? i think they a bad bitch. also UM might i request a drabble abt like a film major! yn (that is very enthusiastic abt films and the aesthetics + cinematography and whatnot) w like,,, a theatre kid?? any of ot7 works fine and it's all good if u can't or don't want to! thankyouu 💜
muse of mine
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pairing: namjoon x y/n
wordcount: 4k
glimpse: namjoon’s always been a little sensitive to feedback whether it’s positive or negative, y/n’s an endearing type of talker, and smuggled snacks to the theater haven’t ever tasted this sweet :D // gif from pinterest!
notes: i kinda switched it up a lil bit and made them more established in their respective fields bc my mind went berserk on this concept!!! also this is mayhaps my oNLY piece that’s just pure fluff
“27? The number? Hmm. That sounds... sexy.” - band!hobi
this been’s bugging you for the past half hour
this whole experience feels oddly familiar
you’ve been in this theater for half an hour so far to watch this play!!
lmao ur gonna admit RIGHT off the bat that theatre’s definitely not it for you
your slight unfondness for it is deeply-rooted back to university and for four years, you’ve consistently taken dumps on theatre kids even if it’s under your breath
alright it’s possible that you don’t hATE the actual people ( only some of them ;D ) themselves but rather this whole type of cockiness and the “i’m a direct descendant of shakespeare himself. trust me bro. on god” energy that they always seem to exhude
but realistically, maybe this deep-rooted hate stemmed from seokjin
he was the guy you’d share the exact same elective class with him for two straight whole semesters and you’ve been seatmates from time to time
homie took foreign language as an elective?????
the language is korean?????????????????
“wait b-but i — aren’t you — n-no but i really???”
that’s what you first sputtered to him in realization when he took his seat beside you
the two of you have only ever shown each other notes bc the other was dozing off and the occasional sharing of gummy bears that’s already pre-opened to not make any noise
but for some reason, it’s only dawned in you why seokjin’s a god in this class and he answers your questions without even looking at his notes by hALFWAY through the whole semester of foreign language
one day, u are gonna find a way to bodyslam yourself and never recover from it ever again
“mhmm. don’t sweat it, sweetheart. i personally think it’s very don quixote of me to y’know, take something as impractical and amusing as this.”
you snort at his choice of words because honestly!! you barely remember don quixote and jin’s use of it as an adjective jigs up a refresher course on your brain
who was he again?? 
was he the donkey
.. or are you thinking about shrek again because of your film analysis
you sWEAR there was a donkey in that story
it’s good fun to talk with jin even if he keeps sliding bourgeoisie words here and there and you’re a lil confused with all these references that he makes but that’s okay !!!
atleast even him saying it in a long-winded way that he was like someone from the merchant of somewhere, you know now that he pretty-pleased and charmed his way to the registrar for him to take korean as an elective
...
two weeks later, jin sits next to you in class 
in ACTUAL non-elective, non-native language he already speaks class
now that you’re squinting a bit more, jin does look a little uh?? different
his hair that was once a hybrid of lavender and peach and pink and then blonde was now wholly black and it’s probably his original hair color because it matches with those eyebrows of his!!!
his combo of a black bomber jacket with a silk button-up underneath honestly SLAPS and it makes you forget how he used to exclusively wear only knitted shirts and argyle-patterned cardigans
you have ur jaw dropped because you totally would’ve fallen for seokjin jAW-FIRST 
— if only he didn’t strike you as the brother type when he smacked the back of your head because you were falling asleep on class again and uhhh you mUst be forgetting that the two of you were sitting in front
you had no time to reevaluate whether you should develop a crush for him or not 
he’s immediately slapping his hands on his knees, looking at you so intensely before pointing a finger at you with so much conviction, and then scoffing to himself
“switched majors to film. theatre was gonna be the death of me!!! y/n, if you even think about trying to switch to that cheap, amazon-ordered quill and tanning lights for stage lighting major, you’re absolutely dEAD to me-”
you’ve never had a conversation this striking nor long with jin but you genuinely have no complaints at all
seokjin talks pure shit about theatre and theatre junkies and everything in between for the WHOLE day 
trails beside you for every single class you had, which was convenient because he can then sweet-talk his way again (if anybody even dared to question him) that he’s just newly-switched 
sat with you for lunch and him not eating because he just needS to tell you all about it and you trying not to choke on your pasta as you try to reply to him
followed you back hOME and decided to crash the night there
yeah, that. your unfondness for theatre’s rooted on that one
uh-huh safe to say that you’ve become best friends with jin ever since that day
you’re a sponge for your friends and jin’s the closest one you have, so it was only natural that you soak up his distastes and whatnot
not to brag but aha :D
you add salt to the water while you boil pasta so u may be a little bit of a masterchef or somewhat, no big deal :D
he’s absorbed your fascination for all kinds of lights and fixtures that he has about seven different nightlights in the form of squishies or neon and everything else on his bedside table, in which he turns all of them on at night
fun fact: he’s capable of sleeping in the dark
jin’s the whole reason for your stance on this
he’s adamant about his points and you’ve graduated uni four years ago!!!
which is why you DON’T get why jin would give you a scented black envelope, with “don’t come to this” scribbled in gold at the front, carrying a single ticket to this play with a sticky note saying “don’t watch this at 7 pm, wearing your boss lady year-end award show type of clothes, sitting at the ninth row from the back and two seats from your right.”
because of course!! what the hell did he expect you to do? NOT come to this play at 7 pm wearing your boss lady year-end award show type of clothes then sitting at the ninth row from the back, two seats from the right???
OF COURSE YOU WOULD
your goal in life is to do exactly the opposite of what jin tells you. there’s literally nothing else in life you’d want to fulfill
he’s made it quite easy for you to spite him and although you wouldn’t admit it.,,.,., you may be a little petty ok
he’s the even bigger goof out of the two of you and you can never have the final say!! it’s always him and his wit and yOU being the dunce
it’s a lil sus that jin’s basically ASKING for it with his instructions but whatever
whatever it is, this is finally your chance to enact the final say and you’re gonna pull ALL the stops
all you know about theater-goers is that they dress fancy and wear these mini binoculars and that’s about it
there’s not even one film you know that you see anyone in the audience wearing a worn-in cardigan or even a puffer jacket even if the theater’s mad cold
all the people bring are scarves and shawls???? thee thinnest version of a blanket that won’t warm them up against the frigid airconditioning
that whole dress code sounds ridiculous!!! great please ring out this thousand-dollar dress im gonna wear to the theater thank u
you’re a little worried that you’re not gonna blend into the crowd, but after some digging about the invitation, formal wear is most definitely recommended
it’s an exclusive invite-only play which would be later released to the general public later on so yeah the situation dOES call for a gown thank u very much
also how could you forget that jin explicitly told you not to wear this type of attire
if you’re being humble right now, which you always normally are, even if that jUST sounded boastful talking about how you’re humble all the time —
you do look pretty breath-taking :-)
even when the doors weren’t opened and everyone’s just collectively loitering outside the hall, you’d feel glances at you
the sweet security guard did a double-take at you and mumbled a “very very nice evening to you, miss :D” instead of his normal “enjoy the show!” to the other patrons before you
you’re gonna soak all the silent compliments up and try to remember all of them before writing them on your journal later hee-hee
your midnight blue satin dress that’s floor-length and off-shoulder is dEFINITELY in your favor :D
your dress still glimmers even if the spotlight isn’t on you and you wish you weren’t shy to ask a random stranger to take a picture of you
going on self-timer isn’t ideal either when there’s like a hundred other people in the room
they probably wouldn’t even care if you took a picture of yourself!!! but in your head they probably think that you’re laughable so you’d rather not.. do that
the theater’s dark as hell if that wasn’t established
it is literally pitch black in the room and the ushers at each row holding the flashlights that are meant to guide the patrons aren’t exactly helpful
big kudos to them though,, must take a lot of self-control to not wave their lights like it was a rave :D
a flashlight tHAT bright?? whew pls is this what ships feel in the night
the last time you were in a rave, your thirty minutes of fun was cut short when seokjin immediately got hammered and wouldn’t stop throwing a fit if you didn’t drive him home that instant
his energy seemed to compelling everyone that he’s managed to somehow suck the energy out of a WHOLE rave so you took him home for everyone’s enjoyment :(((( except yours apparently
you’re trying hard to focus on the play that’s happening because for the past twenty minutes, all you’ve done is zone out randomly with ideas all of a sudden 
you NEED to listen
....
uh-huh...
UH-HUH......
wait this is actually.. good
you find plays hard to follow and absolutely boring when you don’t immerse yourself in a run-down PRIOR to watching it in order to get
it’s the same analogy as reading the plot of a movie on wikipedia before watching the movie at the cinema.... absolutely useless
it sucks out the fun from something you weren’t supposed to know
watching plays is two hours of you being confused, going home to read the plot and only understand it by tHEN, and never coming to the theater again because you’d waste your money.... watching something cluelessly in the theater..... for a plot you’d grasp at home
but no
because this one
actually this one that you’re watching...
it’s not bad
it’s nice, actually.
within two minutes, you managed to grasp that it’s a story about a never-ending spring between these two lovers
there’s something about the whole setting of it actually that just sucks you in
in some plays, the outfits would seem so forced even in the given context that it reminds you of uh a particular superhero movie
and yes ur aware that stage makeup has to be enhanced so that people all the way to the back row would see
but there’s just something in this scene that’s laid out right-now that actually gets you in awe
it’s of the couple in the back of their pick-up truck and everything about it seems so natural
the background straight up looks like what it’d be if you were to go outside
the guy’s arm around her shoulder seems so natural and in nature that it doesn’t feel like a random cue in the script
the girl twinkles and it doesn’t even feel like a forced type of laugh you’d cue in attempt to warm the audience’s hearts
it’s of a plot where the the guy eventually falls out of love with the girl, while girl gets even more smitten with the guy at the same time
it’s what you take from the past ten minutes that you watch in dead silence, and you don’t even remember in the back of your head that you’re supposed to hate plays
“no way.”
you mumble in disbelief under your breath, head shaking profusely
is your mind playing tricks on you???
you’ve got too used to seokjin sitting beside you that you immediately turn to your right, whispering out your concerns 
“is it just me or is she wearing a different shade of pink?”
you don’t even buffer for one second when you ask the stranger beside you
you’re so concerned that you’re looking at him intently while waiting for his answer that could either console or despair you, a random theater-goer that’s too noisy with her questions for her own good
it’s absolutely dARK as fuck in the theater but after awhile your eyes adjusted slightly
and the first thing you look at after the stage is him
him as in the dude in your right that you just asked all of a sudden
you could only see his silhouette and the faintest features of his face along with his well-dressed suit but god
... you are totally not lying if you say that even the barest silhouette of him doesn’t look handsome
you’re expecting him to tell you off for being so noisy but instead, he’s the one who takes you by surprise
“how did you notice that?” 
:O
“oh my god!” you exclaim almost too loudly that you yourself even jolts, the guy even making you duck with him slightly for a brief second, “im sO sorry!! am i accidentally spoiling it out for you?”
the guy blinks twice, lips slightly parted before shaking his head no
“no, no... this is the first screening — i mean uh, how would you know that?”
oh boy
you’re adjusting yourself on your seat, bum now warm as you try to explain and not be nervous because what if you just made a wrong assumption about this play and you’re sitting next to a goddamn tHEATRE BUFF???
“well i —uh, uhm what’s your name?” you’re flustered and the FIRST thing you ask is what was his name.,.,,
he seems equally as flustered before he adjusts his glasses, “o-oh uhm i’m namjoon...?”
alright! handsome guy is namjoon!
“you see, namjoon — okay it might just be in my head, but i tHINK it looks deeper with the light somehow. but uh...? the spotlight’s not following her and — is it just me or without the light, her sweater looks brown?”
you’re squinting and if u squint even more, maybe your contacts would just crumple by then
hold on a second
“brown, like — oh my gOD LIKE-”
namjoon puts a hand over his mouth before you could even gasp, hand reaching out for your forearm even before you manage to grasp his shoulder to take it in realization
was it under your nose the whole time??
“... fall.”
:D
holy fucking shit
namjoon looks positively euphoric looking at your face of realization, his once-heavy chest about the whole scene becoming completely devoid of weight
“exactly!!”
his confirmation makes you inwardly squeal, grinning as you point at him and the stage back and forth
“i think this is the first play i’ve become ever interested in watching.”
okay what now
his ears perk up at that, your first sentence that you’ve said after your pink sweater that looks like spring also looks brown like fall in certain scene because of the lighting realization
“it is?”
he takes the chance to look at you as best as he could, trying to play his squinting as cool as he can
namjoon’s far sighted and the glasses he’s wearing are nOT up to date with his current grade bc he’s pretty sure his eyesight’s worsened the past month
he can’t make you out wholly, but he does know that you’re pretty
his eyes don’t linger on you because of the snacks you’re fishing from your purse while you talk that are absolutely illegal in this theater house lmao
but instead, his gaze lingers on you because you’re so pretty
the minimal light that’s bouncing off the stage is enough for him to see a faint outline of your features, highlighting your smiles just right and your dress to glint underneath
“mhmm. i actually hate plays,” suddenly, you’re not scared if namjoon happens to be some sort of theatre buff and you’re offending him because honestly, you feel at ease. “crunch?” you’re holding out the mini bar of chocolate out to him, one he politely declines to because his eyes are bulging out the next second
“you do????”
his genuine reaction indulges you, making you grin ultimately that you put off eating snacks for now to focus on him
“yeah! this is my hate outfit :D”
namjoon giggles as if it’s the funniest thing he’s ever heard
you automatically scoot closer because this time, it’s yOUR turn to shush him
this is totally for just the reason of talking more discreetly and not distracting anyone and is totally not an excuse to be closer to the next guy and touch shoulders with him then get a whiff of cologne because it’s rare for a guy to be handsome and aLSO smell good
your eyes get used to the darkness and eventually, you could make out features of namjoon beside you
he has the prettiest eyes you’ve ever seen
and the way he looks at you makes you feel safe and even your height difference is visible with how probably lonG his torso is compared to yours, his gaze doesn’t make you feel small
namjoon’s still (unsurprisingly) far-sighted and ur so close that he’s a lil cross-eyed 
fuck it he’s gonna go to ophthalmologist FIRST thing in the morning tomorrow
“then why are you here?”
“my friend seokjin,” you lean back upon realizing the original reason why you’re here, the situation being so ironic that you puff out a smile
your friend’s named seokjin?
cool :D kim seokjin is namjoon’s of his favorite directors eVER!!
second best for him actually though.,., no one could quite compare to his first
your explanation makes him cackle several times, a swell of pride recounting why you hate (it’ll be past tense probably after this one) theatre 
“what about you?”
you turn the question to him, making his dimples disappear effectively that you think you’ve just spooked him
“i uh, well i always wanted to see a story that went like this, so i’m here.”
“you’re a critic? oh god. please don’t tell me you heard all my mumbles.”
no this is even WORSE
namjoon’s not a theatre buff
HE’S A CRITIC????????????
god im coming up
“don’t worry, i also think that the drapings must probably be dirty.”
he breaks out into a smile recounting how you were talking to yourself earlier, a snort escaping him involuntarily 
“RIGHT??? it’s like how do you even clean them?? do they fit in washing machines or-”
my god he’s such a nice guy!!!
in fact, he’s everything you want in a guy
you’ve went through atleast twelve facets of emotions for the past hour and you’re not even dating!!!!!!!
“my thoughts exactly!! and if it’s by hand, how do you even scrub the entirety of it?? or wring the water out??”
namjoon KNOWS exactly what’s up :’)
“is there even a clothesline that’d bEAR the weight??”
the two of you are so happy that you just look at each other laughing, a moment in time before namjoon nudges you to lean back because the ending’s happening
you don’t even question him how he’d know that it’s the ending and not just another opening to a new scene, just listening to him
you’re so happy
the play made you happy but namjoon made you even happier :-)
“if you are a critic, you should probably open up your review with this chatty play-hating girl beside you, then at the end, close it off with how she loves it.”
it’s the parting conversation as you realize and holy fuck you are nOT ready for it
you r gonna drag this out for as long as you could <3
......
and namjoon wants in too <3
“noted. if i was a playwright, i’d even make you the lead. which detail should i include? offering me wrapper-covered rice crispy snacks, or asking how you’d watch it while going thru the bathroom?”
this feels so natural
as natural as the couple in the play you’ve just finished watching :))
“you’re hilarious,” you’re not even the slightest bit annoyed and your restrained smile tells him all about it
yea you may have brought in snacks illegally but you aRE gathering your trash up as you’re a decent human being
namjoon wishes you’d pick up after yourself slowly, standing up from his seat as he has the plan of picking up trash that isn’t even his
“what name should i put then?”
you’re silent and oh god he thinks you found his company stupid and would definitely not give him your name
you’re not ignoring him though!!!
his words are still stuck in your head, realizing it lately with his “which detail should i include?”
“me wanting to turn this into a film, actually.”
you test the words out on your tongue, nodding to yourself after a few seconds that you seem so sure of it
“yeah. i wanna make it into a film.”
the lights turn on after being dim for so long, namjoon’s eyes going wide trying to digest what you’ve just said
“w-what?
.....
no fucking way
HOLY FUCKING SHIT SWFRWFBWRHGBRBVWRV SWBHJSDB SHJAVBHGJDS BWHRGHBSVWBGRH
namjoon’s malfunctioning as he’s looking at you from eye to eye, bottom lip trembling while he’s so keen at pointing at you
“y-you’re miss y/n!!”
....
right
oH RIGHT
he’s a fan of yours??
namjoon’s fanning his face because he’s about to literally burst into tears
how could he nOT???
how could he not be emotional when all along, he’s been talking to his number one favorite director????
you and your films are the absolute gems of his life namjoon’s not even kidding
your films were world-renowned for being so natural and sentimental without loading too much into it!!!! you’re known for being so humble through the multiple back-to-back awards and praise you get!!!! 
he cannot calm the fUCK down when you’re rubbing circles on his back
“you w-want to turn my play into a film?”
oh my gOD
you’re fumbling for the envelope and it’s only nOW that you realize that it’s not from seokjin in the first place
spring day a play by kim namjoon an invite for director y/n y/l/n
“it’s you!!!!”
“no it’s YOU!!”
jin’s plan worked alright :D
he’s just FOUR rows behind you lmao
it was just two weeks ago when yoongi, the executive producer of his film that he was directing, let it slip that he was co-financing a play
he met yoongi some semesters later after he became close with you, and he’s aLSO converted yoongi into hating theatre then he fit right in to your little posse of theatre kid-hating film students
that gave jin the laugh of his laugh and yoongi was not joking at all
“no, no. i’m telling you man. it’s different! i even have the script that i’ll let you read.”
and holy shit it IS different
if you see a couple tears on the last seven pages of yoongi’s copy of spring day’s script then mind yo oWN fucking business
then two weeks later, here he is :D
jin managed to also convert you to love theatre even IF it is namjoon’s play that did all the work
( also coincidentally found you a future boyfriend because he’s tired of seeing you alone and the closest you’d get to having someone is projecting your yearning into writing the scripts for the films you’d make )
he’s also secretly co-financed the whole play along with yoongi and he’ll drop that bomb later on lmao
“and that must mean i looked like a total FOOL beside you oh my god im so sorry!!”
namjoon panics at that, about to cry when another realization hits him when he’s about to put his head on his hands
“then that means the friend who gave you the ticket was-”
SEOKJIN VBFHSBVHSFBVSFHDVBSJFV SFJVJSFVSJVSSV SSV V FS FSV SFBVRBVRSVSWVGU
he cries to your shoulder and you never expected to be hugging and consoling someone you’ve just met two hours ago, a more than fond smile on your face he takes advantage of when he sneaks in the chance to ask you
“do you mean that?”
“now why would i lie to the playwright who’s been listening to me talk shit, then theorizing, then crying for the past hour?”
it’s true though
namjoon’s seen it all
he’s still handsome as ever even when he sniffles, his dimples on display when you return his question
“now did you mean it? writing me into your play?”
why are you even ASKING
:D
he’s the biggest fan of u
namjoon’s made notes of your work, dedicated scripts to your movies, and he’s thinking about how it’s not yet hitting you how your whole epiphany about the pink sweater turning brown on his play,,, was entirely inspired from you and your affinity for lighting in your films
he thinks it’s still a little early to kiss you on the cheek even if you’ve already hugged, instead settling on pinching your cheek with satisfaction present in all corners
“you’ve always been my muse.”
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lilolilyr · 3 years ago
Text
Tagged by @ongreenergrasses, thank you!
1. How many works do you have on AO3?
Way over 300! Tho it feels like it's been at 300sth so long by now, it'll be weird to look at once it hits 400 :D
Btw, funny how this tag meme asks for so much stuff that can be looked up by just... looking at my Ao3... without asking for any commentary by me? Lol
Anyhow, rest under the readmore bc this is 20 questions and Long!
Personal post - do not reblog
2. What’s your total AO3 word count?
995596 - just a few more ficlets or 1 longer fic, and I've got a Million! Hey, maybe I should try to write one with... 4404? (I'd need to ask a calculator xD) words exactly... not rly a hardship with how many drabble exercises (exact wordcounts, 100 is the most used, I also do 200, 500, longest was 10000 exactly lol) I've already done... we'll see!
Over 400k for this year alone, and over half of that is my actual writing (not translations etc), I'm so proud! Last year I only barely hit 200k and that included a lot of translating work
3. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?  
Again, one could look this up in my works filtered - sorted by kudos? But all three of my incubus!jaskier witcher series are in it, part 2 of the series is highest with 1091 kudos, then a Venom halloween oneshot, and 'Belonging', a fluffy snake-crowley piece from my ineffable spouses series (yes, sth with under 1k words - 666 to be exact - is in the top 5... my poor longfics lol)
4. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?
...I try to? But atm I have 202 unanswered (and I always click 'mark read' on replies so these are all comments on my own fic) even tho I told myself I'd not let it get past 200, and now I'm doing a tag meme instead of replying to anything so ummmm
Edit: 203 unread now
But I do love love love all the comments I get! And while atm it's still semi-manageable, if it ever gets to the point where I really can't manage to reply to everyone cause it's too much, i'd rly take that as a compliment lol :D I'd still try to reply to the longer and/or more thought through comments tho :)
5. What’s the fic you’ve written with the angstiest ending?
*thinks* I have an MCD fic? But not only is that very much a case of ~posting a draft version that's barely in complete sentences insgead of taking the time to turn it into a real longfic~, I also just killed off the mlm couple I only semi care about and left the wlw couple with a happy/hopeful (rly don't remember) ending, so... hm idk whether that counts for angsty ending
Apart from that... I dunno, I just prefer my babies to be happy and fluffy? *.* i remember a mirror milippa in the mirrorverse one where in the end Michael is worried about lying to Philippa about her identity... there are some angsty TOG and Gomens ones but I think they end happy-ish (my memory is. Bad. but looking through my 'angst' tag I just saw a lot of h/c and 'angst with a happy ending')
6. What’s the fic you’ve written with the happiest ending?
They're all happy???!?
7. Do you write crossovers? If so what’s the craziest one you’ve written?
Ahahahahahhahahaahaha
Check this out
I need you to know that all the works in that collection take part in the same universe (or rather, multiverse), and are alltogether just scratching the surface of my gigantic headcanon multiverse that I've been building in my mind since I was like 10
Actual crossovers other than that I don't remember writing
8. Have you ever received hate on a fic?
Yeh but I only remember clicking 'delete comment', as it should be
Recently I've just gotten a bunch of 'you Need to continue this' and 'omg why isn't there more' or 'this shouldn't end' type comments, not hate, probably not meant maliciously, but So Annoying (maybe espesh bc I don't want to just hit delete on these, but I also don't want to pretend it's fine, but I also don't have the energy for a fight, and trying to explain why that behaviour is entitled and annoying and that I write what I want to write and nice comments should praise what I actually have written, and hoping that they understand and don't get mad is... hard.)
9. Do you write smut? If so what kind?
Check out my rated E and rated M in my works
Mostly femslash lately, but I did also write other smut in the past
Most is a bit dominant/submissive play, but I do also like good fluffy smut with feelings! Best in combo, really :D
10. Have you ever had a fic stolen?
Not in the sense of pretending someone else wrote it (that i know of), but posted to other sites without my permission - writing 'don't repost to other sites' etc did Not help, they even copied those tags lol, so I just let it be, choosing my battles wisely etcetc, I'd prefer for my fic not to be cross-posted by others bc then I can't edit or otherwise influence the fic anymore and don't see everyone's reactions to it, but as long as it's not someone pretending they wrote it, I only semi care, not enough to fight it tbh
PSA: I Only post fics to Ao3 (and WIPs/prompt fills to tumblr&discord at times), if you see them somewhere else that's Not Me and you'd do me a favour by checking them out on ao3 and kudosing&commenting there instead :)
11. Have you ever had a fic translated?
Yup, one to Russian a while back, a floreleine (Gunpowder Milkshake) one to Korean just today actually, and I translated a bunch to German myself
12. Have you ever co-written a fic before?
I made a TOG fic together with @cinnamonplums, well mostly I wrote and she made the art :D
Trying to remember whether I ever actually co-wrote anything... don't think so?
13. What’s your all time favorite ship?
Don't make me choose!!!
Atm Milippa is OTP bc I'm busy writing them for @discoveryfemslashfortnight (this is not a post to reblog for the fortnight), but I'm also still rly into Floreleine, Bering&Wells and Andromaquynh and Andronilynh, and I read a lot of Mirandy lately
All-time favs I'm not rly active in atm but will always be dear to me are the ineffable spouses, clintcoulson, heistwives, gosh so many more I'll stop here tho xD
14. What’s a WIP that you want to finish but don’t think you ever will?
A Heistwives Kinda Job immediately comes to mind
I also rly want to finish at least one cohesive original-ish storyline for the lverse that I already linked for the crossover question above, but I just have so much backstory (it's been over 10 years!!!) and it's... hard...
And everything else that's still WIP and untouched for more than a few months will probably have the same fate lol
Also have a few that haven't even seen the light of day at all, most recent a Mirandy ~what if Andy had been pregnant when Miranda hired her and how would it change the entire storyline~ bit - I wrote it in bulletpoints in one go as quickly as I could, I know I had the finished product in my mind, I don't remember anything now and don't feel like going through the bulletpoints painstakenly filling in the blanks
15. What are your writing strengths?
Writing one-shots quickly in one go
16. What are your writing weaknesses?
Forgetting everything about a fic if I leave it in a draft for a second too long
17. What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic?
There are many ways to go about it, and I think they all work (depending on the fic and the length and relevance of the dialogue)
I tend to leave single sentences as is, and for longer and important sequences use cursive and 'they said in xylanguage'.
18. What was the first fandom you wrote for?
The Hobbit apparently? I remember thinking that fic was so long lol, it's 3k
19. What’s a fandom/ship you haven’t written for yet but want to?
Kat/Ana from Reef Break, they have Such Shippable Chemistry, and it would totally fit Kat's player personality to bang both siblings (she's canonically friends with benefits with Ana's half-brother)... but the ship has one (1!) fic on Ao3 *cries*
20. What’s your favorite fic you’ve written?
TOG Andromaquynh longfic In Your Stead has had the title since last year and probably for a while to come! I loved the story idea so much I really worked with several drafts and only! worked on that fic until it was finished so I wouldn't get distracted & forget about it, and the result was wonderful.
Tagging, if you want to do it, @sarah-fiers @purlturtle @cookie-sheet-toboggan @ussjellyfish @onaperduamedee @startrekgeorgiouery @rosalie-starfall @lonely-night @banashee @xvnot15 and everyone else who sees this
Questions to copy:
1. How many works do you have on AO3? 2. What’s your total AO3 word count? 3. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?  4. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not? 5. What’s the fic you’ve written with the angstiest ending? 6. What’s the fic you’ve written with the happiest ending? 7. Do you write crossovers? If so what’s the craziest one you’ve written? 8. Have you ever received hate on a fic? 9. Do you write smut? If so what kind? 10. Have you ever had a fic stolen? 11. Have you ever had a fic translated? 12. Have you ever co-written a fic before? 13. What’s your all time favorite ship? 14. What’s a WIP that you want to finish but don’t think you ever will? 15. What are your writing strengths? 16. What are your writing weaknesses? 17. What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic? 18. What was the first fandom you wrote for? 19. What’s a fandom/ship you haven’t written for yet but want to? 20. What’s your favorite fic you’ve written?
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lassieposting · 3 years ago
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Hi i havent read the books post-resurrection so im kinda lost on why you dont like phase 2 val? She was easily one of my favourite characters ever, she was flawed (and the books took time to acknowledge them) and relatable and still really admirable (intelligent, brave, loyal) and i really liked her and really appreciated that she wasn’t perfect unlike every other young adult heroines. What went wrong😢😢😢😢
Okay I'm gonna put this under a cut because I very strongly dislike phase 2 val and I know it bugs people who don't feel the same, so. Dead dove dont eat
Okay so first off, phase 1 val and phase 2 val are completely different people. literally. phase 1 val was based on an ex-friend of lardo's who used to apparently be involved pretty heavily in like, editing the books and "she'd react like this" or "val wouldn't say that", and that val she was one of my favourite fictional characters from when book one came out to the release of resurrection. phase 2 val is based on his whiny little girlfriend who likes to start shit with 14yos on twitter, and you can absolutely tell she is no longer the same person. so the long story short of "what went wrong" is "the original irl val's friendship with dirty laundry ended for whatever reason and he decided to retcon her entire personality to suit his gf"
Phase 2 Val, in my opinion:
Weak, like won't even fight back when she gets jumped bc boo fucking hoo she's so awful, bitch get up already, nobody signed up for ur pity party
Whiny. So fucking whiny. All the time. And she's the POV character so it's inescapable.
"Pacifist" but in a really pathetic virtue-signalling kind of way like "Oh, I've done such terrible thiiiiiiiiiiings I'm so awfulllllllllllll look how good I'm trying to be nowwwwwwww pay attention to meeeeeeee" kind of way, it was both boring and a massive eye roll. It's a book about magic and asskicking. Kick some ass. We're here for escapism not "realistic" whining. Yes, irl she'd be a mess. As an author it's his job to strike a balance between the "realism" he wants to portray and making his readers so depressed and done with his heroine that they quit reading, and in my case, he absolutely failed.
Everything must be about her at all times. Skug is having personal problems? Fuck him, they're about her now. Everything is about how it affects her, and her feelings, and be damned to the person actually having the problem. Fucks phase 2 val cain gives about anyone except herself: 0
Bitter and jaded. Which yeah I get why but it's like jesus christ what do we get out of reading about this? It's not even good bitter and jaded where it makes you empathise or admire her strength in adversity or whatever, she's just become a really nasty person with no redeeming features that I could see. Which? Landy outright said she's based on his gf? If your boyfriend is gonna drag ur entire personality through the dirt like that and write "you" as just a collection of incredibly negative traits...yikes.
Really ungrateful about the awesome life she leads? Which bugs me bc I fucking hate mundanity and knowing that all there is to life is fucking working and bad mental health. I would kill to live her life. All she does is moan about it. Like? Quit then. Fuck off back to being a mortal if it's that bad and live the shitty life you wanted to get away from in the first place. That way we'd get no more books, and quite honestly, thank fuck for that. But anyway, she needs to pick one, stick with it, and stop complaining about whatever she chose.
The girl wallows in self pity. And if someone else isn't indulging her enough, she'll wallow harder and louder and more obviously. Yawn.
Her POV is now so depressing to read that Resurrection literally tanked my mental health. I'm not kidding. I fell off the self-harm wagon, the suicidal thoughts came back, reading her dissociating would make me dissociate, I just did not cope whatsoever. Being in her head was just like being in my head during my worst points, and I hate myself, so naturally, I hate her too. Like I get why some people like phase two val. I get that her depression is "realistic" and that trauma does just make some people completely dislikeable and self-pitying, and if people want to read about that, then...sure. you do you, my dudes. But I live that reality, I am that person whose trauma made her a dysfunctional, isolated bitch, and I hate, passionately, having it infest the media I consume to escape.
Essentially if I wanted to engage with a bitter, spiteful, depressed piece of shit in her 20s who pushes everyone away and sucks at everything, I'd live my gd life. Yall see me tryna engage with my real life? Hell nah I'm on tumblr dot com burying my head up the ass of whatever fandom will force my brain to produce some s e r o t o n i n and that is what I need this series for
Also? The dynamic she had with skug in phase one? "Until the end"? "You save me, I save you, that's how we work"? Forget that, it doesn't exist anymore. I stopped reading after Midnight, because she was written like he was a coworker she could barely tolerate. They went from "Lardo confirms on twitter that they talked on the phone a bunch while she was in america and he'd always ask her to come home" to "she comes home and proceeds to blank him for five months while she sits in her fuckin multimillionaire's mansion feeling sorry for herself". Their friendship completely disintegrated, they were totally separated for most of the book, she's written as not giving a single shit about him. She treated him like dirt, and their dynamic basically felt like it was becoming "Local Man With History Of Gravitating Towards Abusive Women Makes Same Terrible Choices For Fifth Time" and? that was the point of no return to me. he supports her unconditionally, no matter what he's going through at the time, he's walked on broken bones to try and get to her when she was in danger, she can tell him anything and he'd never use it against her. I did not, for one second in phase two, believe she felt the same about him. tbh it felt like she could - and wanted to - drop him at the first opportunity and not even feel bad about it, and that's not the dynamic that made me so emotionally attached to phase one. i signed up for "until the end", not whatever bullshit phase two has going on.
Apparently she's "less depressed" now and their relationship is "better" in the books published since midnight, which! might well be true. but I haven't read them and don't intend to, and she's gone from one of my favourite fictional characters ever (which! was impressive! because i almost never bond with the female lead - i normally get attached exclusively to the character i crush on, which would be skug here. val was the first female lead i actually cared about since xena! so im deeply salty about losing her!) to a character i? honestly prefer to pretend doesn't exist. i live in war era dead men/generals crackship land because that way, i don't have to acknowledge her or the fuckin character assassination phase 2 pulled on her.
so yeah, no hate towards phase one val at all. phase one val was awesome and flawed and gave me something to aspire to despite my shitty mental health and trauma, and if she'd kept her original personality she might still have been those things. but the original "real life" val is no longer involved (and doesn't talk to landy at all anymore, apparently), and the val based on landy's insufferable gf? i cannot get behind her at all ever, four for skug and none for phase two val cain bye
(tldr; you're not missing anything by quitting after spx)
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pappydaddy · 4 years ago
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Heather Part Two (j.m.)
A/N: Okay, so I have decided to start saying as little as possible in my A/Ns just to see if it brings in more interaction, if you guys want me to continue my ramblings, just shoot me a DM or something and I won’t stop them. This is a repost bc nobody saw this the first time?? Pls interact with this (preferably reblogging, but likes are good too!) 
 Anywho, this is the second part of Heather (my JJ imagine based on Heather by Conan Gray) and this is told from JJ’s perspective, I got this idea when I found this kinda parody/cover of the original song which will be linked below. I put some different scenes in this one too so it’s not just a retelling of my first part. Anyway, enjoy!!
Show/Movie: Outer Banks
Pairing: JJ Maybank x Reader
Warnings: Sad, angst, longing, negative thoughts about oneself (appearance, personality, etc), comparing to other people, jealousy, unspoken feelings
Might do a part three? I’ll probably do a part three.
Heather Cover by Zachary Tay
Part One | Part Two - You’re here!
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  He didn’t technically see her when she arrived at the beach, but he still knew she was there before she wandered down the dunes. He couldn’t help but glance over his shoulder, trying to get a peek of her. There she was, her shoes swinging by her side, her hair blowing in the wind as she walked. She didn’t look towards the group of her friends, instead, she scanned the beach and JJ found himself missing her gorgeous eyes. He watched her, her eyes slowly drifting towards the fire JJ sat at. In a spilt second, their eyes connected and JJ wished he could stay in her gaze forever, but her eyes were ripped from his as she breezed past the group.
 The girl under his arm laughed loudly, making him draw his eyes away from Y/N. He looked at the black-haired girl (Heather) donned in his sweater, clinging to him as she laughed at something John B had said. “What’s so funny,” JJ asked, trying to play off his absence. He didn’t really listen to John B’s recount. “Oh, must have had to heard it in the moment, I guess.” He mumbled, his eyes following Y/N as Jack, her co-worker from The Wreck ran towards her, a large smile on his face. He took in Y/N’s appearance, the sweater she wore was too big for her, it certainly wasn’t hers. It dawned on him like a lighting strike; it was Jack’s sweater. He felt a pang in his heart, remembering how she looked in his own sweater, the very sweater Heather wore right in that moment.
 He remembered how good Y/N looked in his sweater and how often she wore it after he had given it to her. On Heather, it was just a piece of polyester fabric, but on Y/N, it was much more than just a sweater. The day she gave his sweater back to him was the day he concluded that she didn’t like him. He couldn’t imagine how he even thought she would like him, he’s not even good enough for his father and he could barely stand himself. How the hell would Y/N want him if he didn’t even want himself? He didn’t even understand how Heather liked him.
 His eyes followed Jack as he ran off once again, obviously apologizing profusely to Y/N. Jack was everything JJ wasn’t: sweet, smart, hard-working, career driven, and loved. JJ wanted to hate Jack, but he couldn’t, he was too good of a person. He could see that Y/N and Jack would make a good couple, he could see why Y/N would have her gaze set on him. His dark hair, his tall stature, his boy-next-door smile - he was the complete package.
 Setting his eyes on Y/N yet again, he saw her sit down on a piece of driftwood, staring out at the ocean as the waves lapped up towards her barefeet. He let himself imagine that the sweater she was wrapped up in was his. He often replayed the December night he gave his sweater to her in his head, imagining that he had actually done what he wanted - kissing her. He liked to live in that alternate story at night, laying in his bed. He sighed, glad he didn’t kiss her in the long-run, for he didn’t know who he liked more: Y/N or Heather. “JJ, you should tell Heather about that one time when John B was high off his ass when CPS came knocking on his door.” Kie laughed, capturing JJ’s attention from the girl sitting on the driftwood.
 “Oh, uh, yeah, sure.” JJ laughed, remembering that day as he launched into his story. Though his eyes weren’t on her, Y/N still plagued his mind, having been there that day as well, skipping school to smoke with JJ and John B. He laughed as he retold the story, poking fun at John B, but leaving Y/n out of the story, not wanting to pull her into his fling with Heather, knowing there will be drama if he did.
 Though he was immersed in the story he was telling, he still noticed Y/N standing and walking along the beach, leaving the party before it even started. The bleeding colours in the sky made her skin glow with pink and orange, making her look like the figure of beauty. As she walked away, JJ could have cried. He didn’t understand how he, the boy who wanted nothing to do with the messiness of love, ended up in this situation.
____
  The words Kie had told him earlier rattled in his brain like a single pill in a bottle. His mind played that moment back like a movie reel continuously playing. Once it ended, it restarted again. Like a painful torture device used to drive him to the brink of insanity.
 “I don’t get why Y/N keeps avoiding us! We never see her anymore, not since Heather started hanging out with us,” JJ groaned, plunking himself down on the couch dramatically. He had asked Y/N earlier at school (after cornering her at her locker) if she wanted to have a movie night just like old times, but she had told him she was going to study for a big biology test she had. “Why does she even need to study anyway? She’s at the top of her biology class, only second to Pope, of course.” JJ threw in the last comment, pleasing his friend who sat beside him on the couch, a freshly popped bowl of popcorn in his lap.
 “You guys do know why, right?” Kie asked, looking over her shoulder at them as she shifted through the DVD collection, the group deciding to go old school for the night. JJ shook his head while John B and Pope both nodded, making noises of understanding. JJ looked around, confusion clearly painted on his face.
 “Y/N still likes JJ.” Pope commented, tossing a handful of popcorn into his mouth, chewing it as if what he had just said was common knowledge.
 “What?” JJ asked, panicked, glad that Heather was hanging out with some of her other friends tonight instead of being with them. If she had been here, he would have never be given this piece of information.
 “You didn’t know?” John B asked, bewildered that JJ hadn’t picked up on anything.
 “Obviously not-” JJ cried, his eyes wide.
 “It was obvious, we all thought you had known by at least December third when you gave her your sweater, we thought that was you making your move on her finally.” Kie explained, shrugging.
 JJ still couldn’t believe that. If only he had seen how much she liked him, maybe he wouldn’t be praying for his eyes to catch her’s every time she walked by him. Maybe he wouldn’t want to cry every time they broke eye contact. Maybe he wouldn’t have assumed she likes Jack. He groaned, flopping around in the spare bed at John B’s, staring up at the dark ceiling as moonlight casted the window’s shadow onto the white surface.
 If he had known how much Y/N liked him that night, he wouldn’t be questioning who he liked more still. Maybe he didn’t like Heather at all. Now that he knew that Y/N likes him, he started to realize that maybe he didn’t truly like Heather, instead, only liking the idea of the distraction from the one he really liked. Though he realized this, he couldn’t do anything about it anytime soon. He had plans to eat lunch tomorrow with Heather and the group, he couldn’t break up with Heather at The Wreck.
_____
 Y/N was working today. That was the whole reason they were eating at The Wreck, to see her. John B and Pope missed her, Kie was able to see her during the shifts they shared or during shift changes, but the boys hadn’t seen her. JJ and Heather stood on the deck, leaning against the railing and JJ was giving the performance of his life. He couldn’t have Heather thinking that something was going on with him (he still had no idea who he liked more) so he was trying to act as normal as possible around her despite the fact that a war raged in his mind.
 He tried to keep his eyes on Heather as she talked adamantly. JJ nodded along, not really listening. Heather was beautiful and kind, but JJ grew bored easily. They had nothing in common. He was a surfer, she was from the city filled with concrete buildings and shopping malls. She just didn’t understand the joy in the little things. When JJ wanted to stargaze, she’d rather gaze at a TV screen. When JJ wanted to just sit on the beach and listen to the waves, she wanted to take pictures. When JJ just wanted to sit on his surfboard and let the waves roll under him, she didn’t want to ruin her make-up.
 Her hand squeezed his as she asked him about the stores he shopped at. He, not wanting to ignore her, joined her one-sided conversation and explained his mode of gaining clothes. She listened for the most part, but listening wasn’t really Heather’s strong suit. She loved to talk, not that JJ minded, but he would also like to have a conversation without being interrupted with a completely different story. He shot a glance in through the door, seeing Y/N at a table, talking with the costumers. She nodded, a shining smile on her face. JJ loved talking with Y/N. She’d listen, she’d talk. He’d listen, he’d talk. It was a perfectly balanced conversation with Y/N.
 He looked back down at Heather when she had asked him yet another question, but JJ wasn’t listening. “I’m sorry, what?” He asked, blinking. Heather giggled, thinking JJ was just a spacey type person who stared off in the distance, zoning out easily.
 “I asked about your shark tooth necklace, I’ve always wanted one.” She told him, the hand, that wasn’t in his, reaching up to fiddle with the shark tooth. JJ looked down at it, smiling fondly.
 “My friend made it for me with the shark tooth I found, I’ve never taken it off since they gave it to me.” He left out that it was Y/N who made it for him while she was going through her necklace making phase in middle school. She had made it too big originally, but it was okay since JJ grew since then.
 “Oh, well, maybe I could wear it sometime,” Heather asked flirtatiously. JJ gulped, not knowing what to say. He didn’t want to give it to her, but he didn’t want to start a fight before they ate a meal with his friends in public. Instead of answering, he pressed his lips to her’s in a lingering, long kiss. Heather smiled, giggling against his lips. Pulling away from the kiss, JJ glanced at the parking lot to see if John B and Pope were there yet, but his eyes came up with nothing. Heather shivered as a strong wind blew by them. “I’m a little cold.”
 JJ looked down at her, seeing that she didn’t have his sweater on. It was different, when Y/N had his sweater, she always wore it, or at least brought it, just in case she got cold. Heather didn’t bring it anywhere unless JJ asked about it. Wordlessly, JJ unlaced their fingers, dropping his arm around her shoulders, pulling her towards him. “I wonder if Y/N is cold? She doesn’t have a sweater on, only a t-shirt.” He thought, watching the parking lot out of the corner of his eye. He sighed, trying to clear his mind.
 “Yo! Let’s get some grub! I’m starving,”John B cheered, piling out of the van with Pope who cheered in agreement. JJ pulled away a bit too quick to play it off as normal while John B and Pope jogged up the stairs, their sneakers slapping the wooden deck. They walked right into the restaurant, leaving Heather and JJ to follow them. The bell above the door dinged, making Y/N and Jack look up from what they were doing. JJ looked up, seeing Jack leaning across Y/N, his shoulder touching her torso ever so lightly as he cleaned up spilt water. “Hi, Y/N! Where is your section?” John B asked.
 “Sorry, John B, I’ll have to take your table so she can get cleaned up, next time.” Jack told him, getting another dry towel to try and help her dry her clothes so she wasn’t dripping everywhere. JJ could sense John B’s disappointment, and he had to admit he was a little bit disappointed that he wouldn’t be able to hear Y/N’s sweet voice that he missed so much.
 “Thanks, Jack,” John B nodded his chin in Jack’s direction. “Maybe we’ll talk before we leave, Y/N.” Y/N looked back up from her shirt at the mention of her name, nodding. Their eyes connected as Kie and Heather jumped into a conversation. Every time their eyes connected, it was such a relief to JJ it truly was a sight for sore eyes. Much to his disappointment, their eye contact was gone as fast as it came when Jack interrupted.
 “That should be good, Y/N,” She looked from JJ’s eyes to meet Jack’s. The sight of her eyes connecting with Jack’s made JJ want to cry, missing that tiny connection that seemed to be the extent of their friendship these days. “You should go get changed, I’ll take these to the table for you, table four, right?” The group started to move, but JJ wanted to stay there, see if their eye would meet again before she disappeared to change, but he had to go with them. He was just out of earshot when she replied to Jack who carried the tray of drinks towards table four effortlessly.
____
 He knew he shouldn’t have done this at school. He was kicking himself as Heather weeped, her face in her hands. “I’m sorry, Heather,” He whispered, nervously looking at the crowd watching them. They were stood next to the side of the building, the crowd gathering in the parking lot. He had tried to do it privately, but he also wanted a clean cut. When he saw his sweater in Heather’s hand, he had known that today was the day. “It’s just not working out.” He tried to console her, his fist gripping the sweater he held now.
 The group watching whispered, making JJ roll his eyes. Now he was going to be painted the villain, the heartless asshole who broke up with the girl in front of the whole school even though they just see her weeping and gasping, not the part where JJ was actually considerate for once. Normally, it was a harsh slap to his cheek and a few tears slipping past their eyes as they walked away, not full on sobs. Especially since they were only going out for three weeks - tops.
 Heather looked up from her hands, letting her arms swing at her sides as she glared at JJ. Black streaks of makeup cascading down her cheeks. With a final, harsh glare at JJ, she ran off, the group of people parting to let her through. JJ watched her run, his shoulders deflating at his ruined chance of keeping the break-up private. His eyes landed on one of the pairs of people Heather parted in her haste to escape: Y/N and Jack. They stood side by side, Jack holding both their books in his hands, both their bookbag straps on his shoulders.
 The group quickly dispersed, giving JJ a perfect view of them. He could see Jack say something to Y/N before she said something back, their eyes catching each other, once again making eye contact. JJ was so absorbed in her eyes that he didn’t notice the sympathetic smile she sent his way. It felt like forever as he stared into her eyes, her just staring back. He wanted her to stay, he wanted to stay, but he couldn’t just break-up with Heather and then turn around, rush towards Y/N, sweep her off her feet and profess his love for her - then he would be an asshole.
 “Come on, Y/N, let’s go. We can’t be late for our shift.” JJ heard Jack tell her, forcing her to break away from JJ’s eyes. He felt tears prick his eyes at the loss of their moment. His eyes never left her, once again hoping for their eyes to connect again, even though he had to watch her eyes connect with Jack’s which caused his heart to throb painfully. Watching her turn and walk towards Jack’s pick-up truck was the sight that made him want to die, then the pain in his heart would stop - right? The picture of her sitting in his passanger seat didn’t sit right with JJ. The thump of Jack tossing their books and bags in the bed of his truck made JJ flinch, but he still never took his eyes off Y/N, not even when Jack slipped onto the bench seat beside her, starting his truck and slamming his door.
 His pleas were answered when Y/N turned to gaze out the window, their eyes connecting once again in a fleeting moment before Jack slowly pulled out of the spot, exiting the nearly empty parking lot. JJ watched the truck as it drove down the road, waiting until it was out of his sight before he moved. He found out who he liked more. It was Y/N. It was always Y/N.
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fixielixie · 3 years ago
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I was like an cql only at the beginning but then made my way through the adaptions? I don't hate cql per se, I think some of the wangxian scenes are pretty cute ngl like the bunny lantern scene and the way they brought that up again at the ending? That was cute. I also like Xiao Zhan and Wang Yibo but the rest of the cast was kind of weak (maybe Liu Haikuan was good too idk I kinda liked his LXC) Honestly I just heard so much bad stuff about the novel that I was expecting it to be really bad but now I like it a lot more? Some things don't make any sense tbh in cql and I'm like ???? I also heard that JC was gonna be a very good (as in morally good etc.) character in the novel and all the novel did was make me hate him more.
I seriously wish I would've tagged all the stuff with mdzs fanart tho because I'm too lazy to change it now ugh.
tbh i can see why someone would like cql if that was the only exposure to the mdzs universe they had. i didnt like it mostly due to personal preference, it was too slow paced for me and i didnt feel attached to anyone even after watching like four episodes. it wasnt until months later that i read mdzs when i realised they were from the same franchise. a lot of my annoyance now mostly stems from fans of the show acting like the drama is the only "Good" version of mdzs, when honestly, in terms of quality and story telling is far worse than literally every other adaption. i just dont like it when people clearly like cql more because they like the look of the actors and their scenes together and try to make it into some 'its a better story than the original' bullshit they always pull because it clearly isnt.
i really wish i liked the untamed casting more than i do, because i really wanna see the wangxian scenes and enjoy watching them. but i watched the donghua after reading the novel so by the time i remember what cql!wangxian looked like i already had a very set image of what they looked like in my head and cql just wasnt living up to it. im just really nick picky tho, i just dont like how they styled wwx, i dont like his hair, his clothes, how you can barely tell if its 20 years in the past or the present day. woh managed to have such good styling with, what i can only assume, a much shitter budget, so im extra bitter now. im so happy you decided to give the book a chance even with so much negativity surrounding it, and made up your own opinion on whether you like it or not. like so many cql onlies put people off of reading the book and forming their own opinion, or people 'skim' read the book, and then act like that gives them the higher ground to shit on it and say its worse than cql.
also the jiang cheng thifdbgjkf cql is as good as jiang cheng is gonna get, the donghua a close second (the only reason its not first is that it doesnt shove quiet as much jiang trio stuff in our face, mostly bc there isnt the time for it). i honestly think that the book, manhua and audio drama are the only ones that portray jiang cheng as the piece of shit he Is.
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bisexualhobi · 4 years ago
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wait I think I agree not today is really bad but now rank all their title tracks from best to worst pls
lmaoohdksjjdjf i love this question so much anon but due to the fact that i’m me this would get way WAY too long. so i’m doing the top 5 best title tracks and then top 5 worst ones okay? i’m looking at google and apparently they have 26 korean singles so yeah that’s too much.
to rank them as objectively as possible I'm gonna try to take into account gp impact (which is not the same as chart impact since the fandom inflates those numbers), production, creative value (how innovative/different from other pop songs was it?) and the concept of the music video/aesthetic in general. 
BTS TITLE TRACKS: TOP 5
5. Black Swan (2020)
am I cheating by putting here a pre release single? maybe. but it would be a disservice to leave this one out so bear with me
⭐gp impact: this song made more noise as a pre release single than the title track. I saw it in at least 3 end of the year editorials for best kpop songs of 2020. and the thing is it could have been WAY bigger but a lot of stuff happened that sadly made it go away too soon. I don't think this one is as famous or recognizable as the others in this list which is why it's going last, but also I think this song is the most underrated gem in bts discography so it's still going here.
⭐production: this song beat out the front runners (I need u, save me, DNA) solely because of its production. there are not a lot of kpop songs out there that manage to pull off what this song does. it's powerful, it's nostalgic, it's a dark and sexy song without being too on the nose. the mixing is SUPERB I remember the first time I heard it I thought "this would blow the fuck up if it was a Travis Scott song" and I will DIE on that hill. this is an example of heavy autotune on a song done right, not like the rest of their super autotuned songs that sometimes come out unrecognizable and empty sounding.
⭐creative value: it's not truly a new concept in pop to make a song about the Death of the Artist. it’s also not something a rookie group can do, this song needed to be released at exactly the time in bts’ career that it was. there’s just no emotional impact if you just sing about how the music makes your hear beat and you’ve been in the industry for,,, 3 years. this is the type of Swan Song you release at the peak of your career, so that really contributes to the message. mixing a trap beat with a ballet motif is GALAXY BRAIN SHIT.
⭐️concept: the ballet influence is just beautifully executed, this song is a beautiful piece of craftsmanship on all fronts. i think they could literally build an entire ALBUM off this concept, so the fact that they jampacked it onto one single song is both amazing and a little sad for me. i wanna hear more of this. i want a literal Black Swan (the darren aranofsky movie) horror concept where the protagonist falls prey to his own madness because he strives for perfection. but yeah, the song itself and the orchestral version just make this a complete golden concept in my book.
4. IDOL (2018).
⭐️gp impact: i think a lot of people that didn’t know anything about kpop vaguely knew about this song when it was released. i know i wasn’t into kpop at all but in my pop culture circle there was a small bleep from this song bc of the concept and the dance. i think it’s a great “embassador of kpop” track, like if you wanna explain to someone with no previous knowledge what kpop is about you can show them a performance of this song.
⭐️production: the production is a little all over the place for me. the instrumentals are amazing and really creative tho, but like in terms of mixing vocals and the structure of it, it might be a little too grating. it’s not the best produced song in ly: answer by any means but it still makes it work
⭐️creative value: the whole hanbok thing is a 10/10. bts weren’t the first ones to do it, but they did it in such a tightly executed way that honestly that “classic korean roots meets the edgy western feel” concept belongs to them now. groups are still recreating it. it’s a really innovative concept in general.
⭐️concept: the music video is,,,, something. you might love it or hate it, but it’s memorable. i think the purposeful way in which they made it as loud and brilliant as possible can be taken either as a camp adjacent or just as the group going nuts with the budget, which props to them. the choreography is also a BIG plus. the south african influence is really well executed and they made sure to do it as cultural appreciation and not appropriation. definitely the most memorable thing from this song is the choreo
3. Run (2015).
⭐️gp impact: this was their second song to have a music show win. it was the lead single from hyyh pt2 and honestly it might be the best song off hyyh as a whole. it cemented bts as not just another kpop group, because it made non fans turn their heads too! from what i gather this really propelled them forward and made the fanbase grow a lot.
⭐️production: hyyh pt2 is super well produced. i feel like this song in particular makes a fine job of mixing the vocals but it’s not outstanding. the best part is the instrumentals. but overall it’s a really good song with amazing lyrics and a great melody.
⭐️creative value: this built off of what they did with pt1 so they were already in a comfortable place, when they found this sound they really explored it well and deep and it works! i’m glad they went this emo pop route because it was a good contrast to what was dominating the charts in kpop in 2015.
⭐️concept: the aesthetic is PERFECT. there’s not a single other thing that i could add or that i wanted gone. it’s the perfect mix of coming of age teen film and heartfelt, dreamy pop. the music video is by no surprises the favorite mv of a lot of the fandom. the cinematography is beautiful and the song and the video perfectly capture that fleeting moment in life when you’re in the brink of adulthood.
2. Mic Drop (2017).
⭐️gp impact: this song was the first bts song to chart on the billboard hot100. back when the fandom had no idea how to chart, mass buy etc. that’s enough said. (personally i think mic drop is the quintessential bts song and their best release so the fact that i’m not putting it first should count as something).
⭐️production: for the purposes of this ranking i’m using the original mic drop and not the steve aoki remix even tho it was the steve remix that was released as the single. the song has the BEST mastering i’ve heard in kpop. the transitions are flawless, the beat is pure fire, the entire first minute is literally the hardest hype rap i’ve heard in kpop. everything about it WORKS.
⭐️creative value: it’s kinda funny how this song got released the same year as kendrick lamar’s humble, because imho it’s the best hiphop song of that year after humble. 2017 was truly the year of the diss tracks. bonus points for including it right after the billboard acceptance speech skit in ly: answer. SUPER refreshing among the ed sheeran type of pop that dominated that year.
⭐️concept: it’s a great concept but not innovative by any means. still, it works and bts managed to exploit it to the max. the choreo, the mv, the styling, everything was amazing!
1. Blood, Sweat & Tears (2016).
⭐️gp impact: it's probably the first song to put bts on the map beyond the kpop sphere. it really set the tone for their 2017. it's one of their most famous and recognizable songs to date.
⭐️production: this song is STUNNINGLY arranged. the mix, the ambience, the progression,,, it's all brought together to make a very well crafted song. it has a distinctive electronic/pop sound to it that still manages to set itself apart from the trend that was going at the time. black swan is probably the closet single they have to this in terms of production.
⭐️creative value: the song itself is very in compliance with the 2015/2016 trend of hype songs with edm influence, (ie. closer, shape of you, cheap thrills, let me love you, something just like this, etc.) but it still packs that punch that makes it sound fresh even for 2021.
⭐️concept: it wasn't the first song to sound like this in kpop ofc but it was the first truly sexy concept for bts. the aesthetic is innovative and very well thought out, the mv is amazing and the choreography too. i read somewhere that j-hope had a lot of input for this choreo so that's amazing. also blond taehyung is literally the best thing to come out of big hit.
WORST BTS TITLE TRACKS
ok so here we go with the worst ones! this is in ascending order as i prepare myself to pick the worst of them all, but please remember this isn’t meant to be mean spirited, i am simply applying the same criteria to their most underwhelming songs but that doesn’t mean they don’t have their own merit! it’s just that out of 26 singles, SOME of them have got to come out at the bottom right?
5. Life Goes On (2020)
⭐gp impact: this song is not memorable with the general public, its #1 on the bb was the product of mass buying and even though it's a feel good song made to comfort fans in the times of pandemic it's still bland and boring. I think it had no music show appearances either, and as far as bts ballads go this is just bottom tier. it’s not that it’s terrible, it’s just very underwhelming 
⭐production: the autotune in this song is very poorly executed, it doesn't add to the song the way black swan does for example. it's just off putting and the melody is really forgettable. it's funny bc the chorus is directly pulled from the 2018 reggaeton super hit "La Canción" by J Balvin and Bad bunny lmaooo 💀 so I can't get that out of my head either. the structure is just fine and has nothing of substance 
⭐creative value: the song is attempts to be a heartfelt acoustic song but it really has nothing that sets it apart from other songs product of the pandemic like Justin and ariana's stuck with u. for a song in a self produced album it's the song with the least input from the group. the lyrics are good, but they're not as sincere or groundbreaking as for example Spring day. 
⭐concept: as a ballad ofc I'm not expecting it to have a grand choreography, and the mv being filmed in their personal dorms to reflect the lockdown is actually a nice touch but besides that there is nothing exciting, innovative or even sincerely comforting about the song and the concept. the greatest thing abt it is the fact that jk directed the video, which is actually pretty good.
4. We are bulletproof pt 2 (2013)
⭐gp impact: this song made no noise back in the day and to this day its just beloved by the fandom due to a sense of nostalgia and "remembering bts' roots". don't get me wrong it's amazing that bts still perform it in the year of our lord 2020 because you can't forget where you came from, but it's not a good or memorable song by any means. 
⭐production: I went back to listen to it for this and oh god. I can't remember the mixing being THIS bad. jimin, jin and taehyung sound exceptionally bad, they don't sound like themselves especially jin. it's just a really poorly mastered song, but then again the rest of their debut album isn't far better. 
⭐creative value: this is straight up ripping off early 2000s black culture from the US. not only the music, the styling for this era in general is unfortunately really bad and culturally appropriating and overall it's a mess. 
⭐concept: there is nothing of substance to be said about this song. it's just really a miss. the mv is terrible, the only thing that can be salvaged from this is the choreography, but besides that the whole thing feels sloppy, rushed and is also kinda cringey.
3. N.O. (2013)
⭐gp impact: no noise. this song was just a really weird pick for their first comeback when attack on bangtan or coffee was right there. not to be mean but no wonder they didn't have a music win this year. 
⭐production: it's an objectively bad song. it's just really underwhelming, the whole mixing feels amateur. it's not a good hiphop song and it's not a good vocal arrangement and the chorus is also a rip off of a late 90s American song I can't find right now 
⭐creative value: this song isn't innovative in any way, it's just..... there. very meh in general, I have nothing more to say about it 
⭐concept: the storyline kinda wants to go somewhere with the music video but it doesn't manage to make a connection. the styling is plain, simple and not flattering at all. it tries to make a protest of the Korean school system but it doesn't say anything beyond "school bad" which we already knew
2. Not Today (2017)
⭐gp impact: its a very middle of the list song for a lot of the fandom. I literally know of no one that claims this as their favorite mv/era/song. when you ask people about their least favorite bts songs they won't mention this one either, you know why? because it's that irrelevant. it had no music show wins either. it's precisely because of this why I put it so high up on the list. there's nothing worse than an unmemorable song, if it was widely hated then at least that would be a response. 
⭐production: it's a really mediocre song in terms of structure and melody. it tried to be hype but it falls short. the chorus feels half finished and the message of the song is just “the revolution has begun”? which okay? but it adds nothing to the You never walk alone album either.
⭐creative value: there is nothing exciting about this song, and the chorus is too grating. the rhythm is repetitive and nothing new either in kpop or pop in general. 
⭐concept: sadly there's not a lot to be said for the song. it says nothing of value and what it says falls flat. there's no innovation. you can actually see a lot of idol in this song, and also ON. those two songs are what this one tried to be but failed.
1. War of Hormone (2014)
⭐gp impact: thankfully none. this song got the treatment it deserved, if they had won a music show for this one it would feel tainted lol. now it's just a meme in the fandom but overall it made zero noise and contributed nothing to bts' evolution 
⭐production: the production is very lazy, which is odd because dark & wild has some pretty tight tracks. but this one is just meh, nothing outstanding and the melody is just annoying 
⭐creative value: this is a song that was probably born out of the desperation to have a gp friendly hit. it tries really hard to replicate an outdated idea of what boy bands should be, and it does it badly. simply put this song is very mediocre and misogynistic and the fact that it's a running gag in the fandom that "feminism isn't important when war of hormone comes on" isn't funny and it's actually cringe. please stop 
⭐concept: the styling is so ugly :( the mv is very low budget which isn't surprising but they managed to make more with less in past releases. it's just embarrassing and I wish this song didn't exist, there's a reason why they never play it anymore lol. overall a dark mistake in bts' career
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