#i only have 1 example of a healthy relationship in my life
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Am i blind for not seeing how Caitlyn manipulated Vi? I keep seeing this take and I don’t understand it. She hurt Vi in an inexcusable manner, both physically and emotionally by making classist implications in her anger…
But manipulation? If Caitlyn wanted to manipulate/ guilt-trip Vi into joining the enforcers or killing Jinx all she had to do was say “I had the shot” to Vi instead of her father. But she didn’t bring up the dinner at all or oil & water for that matter. In fact not only did she not blame Vi (initially) or guilt-trip her; Caitlyn blamed herself: “My arrogance led me to take on more than i could handle and she paid the price”. That’s something someone like Vi who always blames herself and takes responsibility for everything really needed to hear so i was happy with it.
I think Caitlyn’s intentions were genuinely good throughout the first episode, both regarding Vi & the undercity but she still had the same flaws from season 1: thinking the enforcers are the ‘good guys’ here and there are just a few bad apples among them (i bet she probs thinks the ones who killed Vi’s parents were just bad apples lol) ; approaching some matters in an insensitive, entitled manner (springing the badge on Vi instead of having a conversation with her first about the reasons why she thinks it’s the best recourse… well at least she apologized for that ig)
I already feel like they pushed Caitvi in a terrible direction that’s hard to come back from in a satisfying way… i think if people willfully misinterpret ALL of Cait’s actions in the worst possible light you guys really won’t be happy w the ending bc there’s a point a relationship really can’t come back from in a healthy way. I doubt even now if it can…
I haven't used the word manipulative just yet because it's a pretty touchy thing with a specific meaning, but apparently you can be manipulative without knowing. She plays on vis emotions a lot, telling her wearing a badge is how she can show that she doesn't support jinx, which just isn't true. She doesn't need to wear one to show that. I'm not gonna blatantly say it's outright manipulative but it leaves a bad taste in my mouth nonetheless. And just blatantly enlisting vi after she explicitly said no and explained her trauma around enforcers is just...bleh. maybe distasteful more than manipulative but regardless it's just icky.
And yeah a lot of people think they're doing right but are actually just awful..."interpreting her actions in the worst possible light". How else am I supposed to interpret what she's done? She undid a ventilation system that gave the undercity clean air, she enlists vi after she said no, saying its easy to hate zaunites, is ready to get jinx even at the cost of a childs life, ffs she hits vi and leaves her there, it's bad, some of it downright corrupt. Apologizing to vi for springing the badge on her doesn't negate her bigoted attitude toward her and the entire undercity, it's not vis job to prove anything to her, especially if it ultimately means letting anyone get hurt at the cost of getting jinx. She sees vi as her possible example of what people of the undercity could be, and even that's fucked up, because once vi doesn't do things the way she wants she thinks she's "no different" than jinx or any other zaunite. I don't think they could have a healthy relationship with all this. I don't even want vi around her after all that tbh. I know it's gonna happen tho so I'll just see what they decide to do
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Numerology observations
I've genuinely learned a lot from @novy2sirius when it comes to numerology so much so that it has helped me make so much sense out of many experience in my life. Therefore I wanted to share some numerology observations with all of you.
astrobydalia
People with 9 energy are so deceitful, they are easily seen as innocent. On the contrary people can see 9s as someone pretty suspicious because they have an air of mystery to them and are the kind of person who you think you know but actually you don't like at all. They always hide the most BIZARRE shit, I'm telling you their life is SO weird. This is how I see 9 people tbh lmao
I've never met a 11 life path person that was emotionally okay, but the weird thing is that they tend to want to lie to themselves and pretend they are okay all the time. All the ones that've met had diagnosed depression and spent big chunks of their lives in very VERY low lows like it's truly hard to watch. Also, random note but I've seen that they are secretly very resentful too and have a hard time letting go of things and moving on. Most of the 11 people I've met had Earth Moon or strong Saturn influence in their moon
Also, I met a 11 guy once who would often say "I have no doubt in my mind that I will be famous" lol (11 is rated to fame)
22 is a more chill number. I've seen more developed 22s than developed 11s. 22 people are very mature and level-headed, tend to have very balanced mindset for most things. However they tend to think they're the only ones who know best, they give good advice but suck at taking any.
So one of the things Novy said is that the date you meet someone in will be a significant energy in the relationship you have with them. Every person I've met on a 5 day are people I travel a lot with or people I've had long-distance relationships with (5 is related travel)
I don't have much experience with 2 energy but from what I've seen it is pretty mellow energy. The people with 2 energy are pretty harmless individuals even when they have other intense energies going on
I get along with 7 life path people cause I'm a 5 but something I've noticed about these people is that they really do struggle making genuine connections "from the heart" if that makes sense. They always rationalize getting in and out of a relationship giving more importance to practical/beneficial reasons rather than emotional ones. When they do try to follow their heart they fail miserably cause they confuse making decisions from their heart with total recklessness
Life path 1 people are so.... immature. And have very obvious anger issues. They have the patience and emotional regulation of a toddler, really do embody the Aries stereotype. At their worst they can be pretty intolerant towards other's pov. Yeah life path 1 is very passionate and driven and all and I do get along with them but I also tend to keep at arms length a little cause they're energy is very chaotic and destructive tbh
Let me tell you too that unhealthy life path 1 people are one of the most CRUEL and mean people I've ever seen like... it's giving blood lust (not literally but you know what I mean)
Life path 6 can indeed be caring and generous but I've met a lot of them who are actually very selfish, greedy and materialistic. It's like they see life mostly through the lens of material gain. They literally remind me of this clip fr.
I have good experience with 6 people tho. My manager for example is a 6 life path and I literally don't know what I'd do without him, he's so patient, always there when I need him and is always on my side even when I mess up. 6 people are also very good at setting healthy boundaries too
A lot of the life path 6 I've met had taurus placements or where earth doms astrologically
The number I struggle getting along with the most is 4 tbh. They are huge party poppers even when they're healthy and have more need for control than 8s imo. A lot of 4 people I know are the type to rain on your parade for no reason in the name of being "realistic" but really they're just being bitter imo. I know 4 people have a hard life but I've noticed they tend to often have this attitude of "if I couldn't be happy then you can't either"
What I've noticed with 8 people is that yes they can be controlling but it's not like they go around policing others like 4s do. 8s control in a very subtle and indirect way, it really reminds me a lot of scorpio energy/8th house placements. It's more like they keep in control in any situation by staying low-key and are the kind of people that is hard to knock down, yet they know how to get under other's skin
I'd describe 8s as more domineering. They can be pretty chill, fun and won't mess with anyone as long as they feel like they have the upper hand in situations. That's why they are stubborn af and refuse to be wrong and why they do not react well AT ALL to animosity. This also means that at their worst tend to have HUGE superiority complex and will minimize others and be condescending just to feel superior
One time I witnessed an argument between a 1 and an 8 (it was messy) and even tho the 8 person was wrong imo they made the 1 person back down eventually (which, if you know how 1s are, that's a huge thing) and from that experience I learned that you're better off disagreeing with a 1 than disagreeing with an 8
People with 3 energy have such a refreshing energy I love them!!!! The type to keep a young spirit regardless of their age but like in a good way. Their sense of hope and optimism can't be crushed, all the ones I've met were the kind of people who always knew how to bounce back from difficult situations.
astrobydalia
#numerology#astrology#astro#astro observations#astro notes#zodiac#birth chart#astrobydalia#astrology observations#astro community#astrologer
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METAMORPHOSIS - CHANGES IN YOUR LIFE
Note: Hello! Thank you for waiting! I hope everyone's doing well, stay hydrated loves 🤭 <33 Check out my Masterlist for more! <3 LIKES AND REBLOGS ARE V APPRECIATED!!
1 -> 3
Do not plagiarise, reword, steal, repost or replicate my work!
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Pile 1
The next phase in your life is going to include you moving away from home. This can either include you moving out of your actual house and living independently or you distancing yourself from the familiarity of what feels like home and trying to step out of your comfort zone. You are supposed to be going on a journey or a trip and this is actually going to be life changing for you. If you have a trip marked on your calendar let me tell you something, you're going to be feeling very in touch with your emotions, if you've built walls around you or are someone who frequents the phrase "why am I supposed to care?" etc to protect yourself from caring too much because you think it's cringe or it makes you uncomfortable, times are changing finally. You're going to be owning the way you feel, you're going to be more open about how you feel and give yourself space to be more vulnerable around the people you love and cherish, not feeling like you have to keep up the "tough" image and truly letting yourself live laugh love.
You are entering a time where your relationships are going to be flourishing, some of you have been through a rough few months when it comes to the people around you, you may be feeling used, betrayed, cheated or even sidelined by them. However new people are coming into your life, they're not only going to be on the same level as you but they'll also be people who will be a little contrasting personality wise like they'll fill the gaps for example if you're not good at communicating but they are and if they're not good at being vulnerable but you are, there's going to be a very healthy exchange of energies and it will help you maintain a sense of self without being overly dependent on them or developing a codependent relationship. Also I have to mention you're finally going to be getting a break, you'll get time to rest and relax and just take a seat because a lot of work you may have done in the past, and this I'm getting could be referring to the past few years related to academics or career, is going to be bearing fruit, making life feel more easy breezy for you lot!
Pile 2
Really good messages coming in for you pile 2! To begin with you may have been feeling a little stagnant lately, not in a bad way, just in a "stuck in a monotonous routine" kind of way, where there's nothing wrong but it just feels full and unexciting. That's changing for you, you're going to be entering a time of your life where things will still be peaceful and calm just slightly more fast paced so that you have to work harder to keep up. Anyone that you haven't moved on from in the past, or even anything maybe people maybe situations, you're going to be shedding off that old skin and almost starting over, there will be a new chapter which will be making you feel more enthusiastic about life. You're realising that you don't need to carry the weight of your past around and are going to be putting yourself out there more, you'll be healing and maybe working with balancing your energies. During this time it would be good for you to engage with energy healing or chakra work as well as soundbaths.
After a long while, you'll be more comfortable being alone, you won't be feeling lonely when you're alone but rather use that time for introspection and working on yourself. This time alone will give you a lot of insight about what you actually want when you strip away everything that society or societal norms tell you you need to achieve. Who would you want to be in life if you didn't have any obligations to anyone? Those are the kinds of questions you will be answering and it'll make you more confident in your skin as well, because you'll truly realise who you are and what you want. I keep seeing the fool so this also shows to me that there's a new chapter opening for you, one where you can make mistakes, you SHOULD make mistakes so that you can learn and grow without dire consequences looming over you. Fresh starts are great for that <33
Pile 3
Hi Pile 3! I feel like with this pile, some of you may be struggling a LOT with breaking past patterns, you may be unable to get out of bad habits because you feel comfortable in that pattern of predictability even if it's bad for you, even against your good judgement. For some of you this could be addiction, which is very difficult to deal with and I'm sorry if any of you are going through that, addiction doesn't necessarily have to be related to substance abuse (even if it could be) it can also be related to shopping or escapism and you will be finding yourself being free of it soon. World has been feeling too fast for you as opposed to the other piles, so for you things are finally slowing down, you're nowhere near the completion of a cycle, in fact you may have started one the end of this August/start of September, so you still have a few months for the cycle to end, it'll probably end somewhere next year around February or March (probably March end though). You need to realise that this is the phase of your life you should focus on, going slow is a good thing! It means you can check yourself and your surroundings, that you can be more present in moments in your daily life, that you can cherish the people and situations around you.
This is a time in your life where you'll be celebrating your wins a lot more, you'll be building your wealth and earning, also a lot of savings! You'll be saving money, bringing down your spending and truly deciding what you need to buy and what you will use if you buy it, so a lot more thought will go into where you're putting your money.
Lastly, if you feel like you've been wronged recently, don't worry, divine justice is in the works, you were "betrayed" or "misled" by someone so that you could be removed for a situation where you had no growth potential, doesn't mean it was right though, neither was the gaslighting that came after (ultra specific) and the person or people who did this will get theirs in due time and you may be present to witness it front row!
All Rights Reserved tiamathh©® DO NOT PLAGIARISE, REWORD, STEAL!
#pick a pile#pick a card#tarot#tarot reading#tarot cards#pac reading#pac#pick a card reading#tarot readings#tarot community
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𝓨ou in the eyes of your s/o | pick a pile
Hello, my angels! After a long time without posting any PAP, here I am with one that just came out of the oven. I really hope you like it and that it resonates with you ;) ♡
┈─★ Disclaimer: This reading is for entertainment purposes only and shouldn't be taken seriously or used as a substitute for medical and professional advice. It's also a general reading, so it may or may not resonate with you.
┈─★ How to choose: Close your eyes, take a deep breath and choose the image that catches your attention the most – trust your intuition.
MASTERLIST | PAID READINGS
── .✦ PILE 1
Shufflemancy: Where The Lovers Go - Ghost Kisses, The End Of Love - Florence, Please Be Angry - Pierz Barry, Smaller Than This - Sara Kays.
This is so cute, pile one! Your s/o has been in love with you since the first moment you met, but they never told you that before because they didn't want to scare you – and I'm happy to play my role here and let you know that ;). Honestly, you even made them nervous and shy when they were around you and that's so cute 😭
In the eyes of your s/o, you are much more than a simple romantic partner. No, you are their family – regardless of what your relationship with them is now, whether you are just friends, lovers or even married. This especially applies to those who met their s/o at difficult times in life or who are shifting to a DR with more adventure/action/danger. For them, you are a person who is there with them in both good times and bad times, whether in your personal life or in your couple's life for those who are already together with their partners. They see you as someone they can count on at all times and you can be sure that they are also the kind of person you can count on when you are going through dark times. In their eyes, you are each other's safe haven and they also think that you know them better than anyone else - so much so that you know when they are lying/pretending that they are okay. You make them feel safe and they trust you, so much so that they feel comfortable enough to open up to you and be vulnerable. Furthermore, because they love you so much, they are very afraid of ending up losing you at some point – but that is just an insecurity they have.
Wow, this is really sad but…many of the s/os in this pile feel awkward in their relationships. But not in a bad way, but because many of them may be dating for the first time, aren't used to being truly loved by those they love or don't have much experience with relationships in general that are healthy. For many, their s/o was raised in dysfunctional and/or toxic families and as a result, they carry a lot of trauma and emotional wounds that leave them feeling like “clumsy idiots” in your relationship. Some examples that illustrate this well are the fact that they are unable to express themselves effectively with words and even more extreme cases in which they would rather you be mad/angry at them than disappointed in them or that you leave them. In their view, they won't be able to handle it if you decide to leave them, so they do everything they can to keep you in their lives – I told you it was sad 😕. But, even with all the fear they felt inside about starting a new relationship, they decided to take the leap and can be sure that it was one of the best things that ever happened to them.
Your s/o perceives that you have self-esteem issues, that you have a distorted self-image and an inferiority complex. In their eyes, you may be trying to achieve an unrealistic/unattainable standard of beauty and this is costing you your mental health and your physical health. Some of you may even be skipping meals so if this is the case, PLEASE STOP FOR THE LOVE OF THE GODS!! To them this is crazy, because they love and accept you exactly the way you are and think you are being too hard on yourself – they care about you and your well-being, so they want you to take more care of yourself and treat your body like the temple it is. They would like you to see yourself the same way they see you, because in their eyes you are very attractive and hot and you shouldn't change anything about yourself 😋 (seriously, it was actually funny because I literally heard them calling you “hottie")
That was all, pile one! I hope you liked it and that it was accurate. You better take better care of yourself or your s/o and I will be forced to hit you 😠
── .✦ PILE 2
Shufflemancy: Laughing on the Outside - FLOOR CRY, Shade - Chymes, You Know Me Too Well - Nothing But Thieves, Heat Waves - Glass Animals, Still Feel It All - MARO.
From the first moment you met, your s/o couldn't take their eyes off you and with each passing day, they found themselves falling more and more in love with you.
There are two situations in this pile: the first is that you and your s/o are not together as a couple yet and the second is that you have ended your relationship.
Regardless of what your case may be, your s/o are madly in love with you 🧎♂️ and every day they have to pretend that they are okay even with the fact that you are separated or have to pretend to others around them that they are not in love with you – but as a good gossip, I am here to expose what they really feel MUAHAHA. But, stopping for a moment to analyze, deep down they feel very sad not to be with you and that leaves them heartbroken.
Seriously, they are so in love with you that they seem drunk with love. When you are together, their heart warms. They may even try to deny it, but they can't help the fact that they want you like they've never wanted anyone in their life so much. Absolutely all they want most is you and they want to give you all of them and everything you want – your wish is your command.
For some of you reading this pile, you and your s/o are still just friends and in their eyes, you know them very well. But, regardless of what your case is, in their view, you have no idea what they are going through. I believe that for s/os who are just your friends, it is becoming more difficult to deal with the fact that they have fallen in love with you and cannot reveal it for fear of rejection or the friendship ending. Some of them may be thinking that you don't feel the same way about them and that they should leave you – poor things, little do they know how wrong they are.
Help, they are really heartbroken for you. Many of them have been in love with you for a long time and they have never been able to get over it. Sometimes they may try to tell themselves that they are over you, but just seeing you makes them fall to their knees – just seeing your eyes, your mouth and especially smelling your perfume. They really want you to want them as much as they want you 😮💨.
They may think that every love story ends in tragedy, that they might not be enough or that you deserve someone better, but when it comes to the two of you, they are willing to try. Sometimes all they think about is you.
That was all, pile two! I hope you liked it and that it resonated with you. FOR THE LOVE OF GOD GO KISS THIS MAN/WOMAN SOON 😭 they're suffering-
── .✦ PILE 3
Shufflemancy: C’est toi qu'elle préfère - Alice et Moi, Breezeblocks - Alt-J, all my daugthers - dodie, Impossible - Nothing But Thieves, If You Let Me - Sinéad Harnett.
The s/os in this pile are an enigma to me 🤔 but I'll be able to solve them
Many of you reading this pile are not together with your s/o, but the other part already is. And, regardless of your situation, it seems that in your s/o's eyes, they are replaceable in your life. They feel like you will leave them or that you prefer other people – in some ways, they may feel like “the other woman”.
But, none of these scenarios are real and these things are only happening in their minds – these paranoias originate from insecurities they have due to negative experiences in the past, such as being dumped or not being the priority of the person who hurt them. These thoughts make your s/o's heart sink, but as I mentioned earlier, they are creating problems that don't exist - so one piece of advice is to reassure them that you love them, that you are there for them, that you really care and who will not exchange it or leave it. They love you so much and are so afraid of losing you, they are almost begging you not to leave them – even if you have no intention of doing so.
Your s/o can see that you have imposter syndrome even though you try not to give a shit about it – you always feel like you're a fraud in every successful thing you do and in every achievement you achieve, even if it's totally your merit and they want you to learn to recognize that you are good at what you do and that you should give yourself all the credit you deserve!!
Your s/o are fools in love with you – the type where sometimes they even catch themselves looking at you with a passionate smile on their face – and they themselves never believed that this kind of situation would happen to them but, here we are lol. Seriously, if you were the ocean, they would dive deep into you. They love the smell of your perfume, in their eyes it is unforgettable. They also really like your mouth – if you're already together, believe me, they love kissing you.
WHAT A BEAUTIFUL THING, PILE THREE!!
Your s/o's love you like never before, literally no one has ever loved you as much as they do. They love you so much that they would really do ANYTHING for you and they are such good partners that they will do for you even what you didn't even know you needed. But, in their view, you still won't let them in (or haven't let them in yet if you're already together). WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR? For them to love you this way, you need to open your heart to them because they have a lot of love to give you and it is more than enough.
That was all, pile three! I really hope you enjoyed this reading and that it resonated with you. You literally won the s/o lottery, so DON'T LET IT GET AWAY!! 😠 Until the next PAP! ♡
© nocturniashifter – don't copy, redistribute or edit my content | dividers
#shifting pick a pile#shifting pap#shifting pac#shifting readings#shifting reading#shifting#reality shifting#shiftblr#shifting community#desired reality#shifting antis dni#shifters#shifting blog#shufflemancy#shuffemancy readings#shifting motivation#shifting stories#reality shifter#shiftingrealities#quantum jumping#shifting realities#shifting to avengers#shifting to desired reality#shifting to hogwarts#shifting to tvd#shifting to descendants#shifting to mcu#shifting to marvel#mcu shifting#mcu dr
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since it's pride month, i want to highlight my favorite underrated/underappreciated queer characters and ships! (part 1/???)
(feel free to add more!)
Lake - Infinity Train (non-canon)
it's not canon but you cannot tell me that Lake isn't an allegory for trans/nb people. her arc is so beautiful and her character resonates with me so much!
i have to admit, i actually kinda hated her in the beginning because of how aggressive and rude she was, but she actually gets good character development and you can also understand why she was the way she was, being a good representation of a minority who is constantly suffering because of the social norms she’s forced into. also i don’t ship her with jesse but i do like the idea of them in a qpr or just being platonic besties.
(i use she/her pronouns for Lake because that's what they use in the series, but also because not all non-binary people use they/them, and it's kinda weird to see people insist on using they/them for Lake just because she's nb-coded. she has never shown an aversion to bring referred to with she/her pronouns.)
Le Chevre x El Topo - Carmen Sandiego (canon)
they are side characters who don't play a huge role in the narrative but they are a really cute couple and have been confirmed to be canon! even without the confirmation, it’s clear that they were written to be a romantic couple.
mild spoiler: after the series ends, they stop being antagonists and instead put up a food truck together! it’s the cutest thing, i swear
Ryan x Min-gi - Infinity Train (non-canon)
my OTP through and through! i say non-canon but the romance is so heavily implied, you cannot ignore it.
they're a good example of childhood friends who had a complicated relationship where both individuals did something wrong, but in the end, they grow as people and manage to mend their relationship together.
Moomin x Snufkin - Moominvalley (canon)
i have only read one of the books and watched a few clips of these two characters but from that alone, it's clear that they were written as lovers (and the author is queer too!)
they are a beautiful portrayal of long-distance relationship where both individuals have different needs in life, but still want to be with each other regardless.
Terrestrius / Terry - The Dragon Prince (canon)
Terry is canonically transmasc and they actually manage to explain this in the series, without making it sound too forced or expository. he's such a sweetheart too, and his relationship with Claudia is actually really sweet, despite the fact that she's one of the villains.
Carmen x Julia - Carmen Sandiego (non-canon)
again, i say non-canon but it is heavily implied that they have feelings for each other, especially in the extra interactive episode, where Carmen leaves a bouquet of red roses for Julia, and Julia is shown to blush when receiving them.
Amaya x Janai - The Dragon Prince (canon)
what’s that? it’s actually possible to write an enemies to lovers romance that is healthy and not extremely abusive?
Amaya and Janai have such a good relationship in S5 (and Amaya is also a great disabled representation!) Janai actually learns sign language to communicate with Amaya, and there are no unnecessary miscommunication plots or drama, they’re just a really loving wlw couple.
Benson x Troy - Kipo and the Age of Wonderbeasts (canon)
when i say we need more mlm ships in animated media!! i’m so glad us sapphics are getting a lot of representation but it’s time cartoons started including more queer men.
benson and troy are just a really sweet couple with a good relationship that doesn’t have a ton of pining or unnecessary angst. while i love complex and tragic queer relationships, i also think that it’s good to show teenagers just being teenagers sometimes.
this opinion seems to be scarce in the queer community, which really annoys me tbh.
Raine x Eda - The Owl House (canon)
i cannot believe that given the popularity of TOH, Raeda is still such an overlooked ship. this might be an unpopular opinion but Raeda is better written and has more chemistry than Lumity and Huntlow.
just within the span of Raine's introductory episode, they managed to establish a clearly romantic past between these two characters, and also an interesting dynamic. and even though they didn't have much screentime, they still turned out to be the best ship in the series. (again, just my opinion, don't come at me)
i think it's so important to show older queer people in media, just as it is important to show younger queer characters. it helps establish the fact that queerness has always existed and isn't some newfound trend that social media invented. not to mention, raeda is one of the very few canon ships that include a non-binary character.
#there are so many more characters and couples that i want to mention#i might make a part 2#the dragon prince#tdp#the owl house#toh#carmen sandiego#moominvalley#kipo and the age of wonderbeasts#infinity train#lake infinity train#toh raeda#carulia#infinity train rymin#snufmin#terry tdp#queer community#lgbtqia#pride month
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your life 5 years from now (timeless)
hi! today we will take a look at how your life looks like 5 years from now. this is a timeless reading so whenever this find you, you can read it. we have free will, i am just reading energies so take what resonates and leave what doesn’t. i would love to hear your feedbacks <3
🥀paid readings🥀
Disclaimer: My readings do NOT replace any professional advice. Use your own judgment while making decisions. You have your own free will. Take everything I say light-heartedly. All of my readings are for ENTERTAINMENT PURPOSES.
pick a pile
piles 1-2
3-4
i do not own these pictures
pile 1
In the next 5 years you will reap what you sow pile 1! I see amazing opportunities career wise. These opportunities will come to you because you are stepping out of your comfort zone and working hard for what you want. You will be stepping up your game and leading your life with proudness. You are action oriented for sure.
You may start doing the things you were afraid of before. Because you are in a more action-oriented mode, you will overcome those fears. At first you will do them while you are scared, but as time goes by you will overcome them.
I see such a confident person pile 1!
For a while you may have been on guard about love. This may have been because of a betrayal or not seeing a healthy relationship example (when you were a child etc.). I see that changing. A person will come who is going to change your outlook on love. They are very loving and giving. You may also do charity work with them. While you are action-oriented career wise, I see your lover coming to you.
I talked a lot about material gains. However you are stepping up your game also spiritual-wise. I said you will reap what you sow. You will and manifesting them will help you get them. Spirit is suggesting you to start manifesting if you don't already. You could do a vision board etc. Whatever feels right to you.
Your intuition will be heightened, like A LOT. Because the card to represent you is the MYSTIC. You will be one with the divine.
At the end of this 5 year period, you will have gone through a massive change. This will lead you to be more confident and be more accepting of yourself. I see you living an authentic life. This massive change will also have an impact on your spirituality.
I talked about you being action oriented, but I still see you preserving your feminine side. You will, thus, have a great balance of feminine-masculine energies, material-spiritual world etc.
Overall I see you quite content with your life, pile 1.
The area of life going through the most transformation: 6th house What energy you will be in: Taurus Your uranus placement will be guiding for you in the next 5 years.
thank you for reading💕
pile 2
This may be literal or metaphorical depending on your situation:
I see someone’s heart getting broken, or going through something hard. However instead of this wrecking them completely, they rise up stronger than ever. This person I am seeing, uses this experience to create a masterpiece of some sort. To let people know that they are not the only ones going through this. Let them help with their sorrow. And this creation makes the wheels turn: they become someone people look up to, they achieve great success.
The first thing I wanna say is: You will get what you deserve pile2.
You may have gone through something in the past or recently that affects you now. If not (please do not be scared) I see you going through something heavy emotionally. This thing depends from person to person. You are/will be victimizing yourself a lot. However when you come out of this energy, the real deal will begin. Like I said in the intro; this will inspire you to do something creative, it doesn't have to be related to art/music but for most of you it is. If it's not related to art/music, it may be becoming a psychologist etc.
From this point on you will have regained your trust in the universe and in yourself. You will start doing whatever this is. For some of you, this is a childhood dream. (This is a confirmation for you to go for it.) Just this heartbreak inspires you to take action on this dream. Whatever you do, your path/creations will help people in some way. And as a result you will gain great success. Jupiter will bless you with happiness and abundance. Because you will be taking responsibility for yourself and will surrender to the divine.
Spirit again and again tells me that you need to have faith in your dreams, they are coming true in the next 5 years as long as you take responsibility and trust the universe. You just need to be patient.
Believe in yourself pile 2, because me and the spirit really do.
The area of life going through the most transformation: 1st house What energy you will be in: Capricorn Your venus placement will be guiding for you in the next 5 years.
thank you for reading💕
pile 3
Your different aspects find life, pile 3. I see you as a multi talented/multi faceted person and all of your versions are blossoming 5 years from now. You are acknowledging your different versions as a person, and nourishing them throughout these 5 years and in the end these different aspects of you will shine brightly together, I see.
You are also tackling more than one job/hobby at once. Maybe you have a main job and a side job/passion project. Or just lots of hobbies. However you are working hard in general. But this is not just a “work to work” thing. You really do enjoy the things you do. I see you living an authentic life. You probably have lots of goals and are working hard to achieve them. By the end of 5 years you will have achieved great things however after these 5 years I see even BETTER blessings coming your way. It’s like you're at the verge of a BIG breakthrough.
I see you financially well off. However you do not stop. You still try to find ways to make more money and better yourself. I see you as an ambitious person.
If you haven't found it yet, you will find your “personal calling”. Or if you have that sort of thing, you will find other things that will light your soul up. Luck will be on your side throughout these 5 years.
I also see you doing shadow work and healing the deep wounds you have inside. (For some, especially regarding money. Maybe some of you struggle(d) from being envious of financially well off people. ) Whatever it is, you are healing.
You are so grateful for the life you are living. I see you quite content with your life. You are emotionally fulfilled. A lot will happen in these 5 years.
You will find a great balance of giving-receiving, moving-resting, planning-accepting etc. You will listen to your soul and body more as well as the universe.
The area of life going through the most transformation: 7th house What energy you will be in: Leo Your north node placement will be guiding for you in the next 5 years.
thank you for reading💕
pile 4
First of all, I see that you have achieved a great balance in your life. You may be lacking some balance regarding an aspect of your life. I see that resolving in the next five years. Also an issue regarding your personal life. That will resolve too, whether it is connected to your balance or not.
You will realize your real potential and take the reins. I suggest you to look up your south and north nodes because they will help you get to know yourself more. You will be showing up to the world as your authentic self. I am not meaning that every secret of your will be on display but you are not people pleasing etc. On the contrary you are keeping your secrets and are working in silence. Yes, this transformation will be shocking to most of the people because you won't be telling most of the people/anyone. For example you may want to start a dance class, you will go there in silence and when people see how well you dance after a while they will be shocked because you haven't told them.
You are not shying away from challenges, pile 4. I see you as a brave person. And I think that’s what makes this transformation bigger and more impactful.
Prior to transforming (or at the beginning), you will go on maybe a hermit mode? You will get all philosophical and better yourself regarding knowledge of any kind. I see you working hard.
You are also standing firm on your ground. When a situation arises, you defend yourself if you know that you're right. I also see this as defending your own life path. I am not saying everybody will be against you or supporting you but if someone talks negatively to you, this won't bother you. Because you are already proud of yourself. So you defend yourself firmly.
A love interest or (mostly) a soulmate will come into your life. You will probably not see this coming but they are coming with so much love and things to offer. For the ones in a committed relationship (and don't see themselves breaking up) this may be about not losing the love and compassion to each other and maybe even taking the next step. For example if you are in a relationship, your partner may propose to you or you can get engaged etc.
You overall will be so happy about the life you are living, pile 4.
The area of life going through the most transformation: 8th house What energy you will be in: Pisces Your sun placement will be guiding for you in the next 5 years.
thank you for reading💕
#tarot#tarot reading#pac#pick a card#pick a pile#intuitive reading#intuitive readings#pick a picture#future spouse reading#love reading
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Pick a Pile: Message from the Moon Card
Disclaimer: tarot readings are not replacements for professional advice; your future’s in your own hands. Take what resonates, don’t force a reading to fit!
pile 1☾pile 2 pile 3☾pile 4
☽
Pile 1:
Cards: The Moon, Escape (Mars in Pisces, 12th), 7 of Cups rx, 8 of Wands, Queen of Cups rx, 3 of cups, Politics (7 of Mind), Justice, 9 of Swords rx, 5 of wands, You Can’t Go Back to Yesterday, Keep Your Temper rx
The Message: hello pile one! The Moon can indicate both illusions and delusions, and this is the focus of your message today. This pile really gets caught up in their own fantasies or the mask they present to the world. There’s the sense that reality is hard to cope with, and you immediately run to what is safe and comforting—even if it is only providing false comfort. You guys really like to daydream to the point that some of you are maladaptive daydreamers—or you could have similar coping mechanisms that “remove” you from reality (some struggle with dissociation). You might be the kind of person to tell yourself a lie and start believing it (no offense, that’s not uncommon lol). Some of you use your friendships to distract yourself; your first response to a heavy feeling might be to go hang out. There’s an emphasis on really rushing to get away from one’s feelings or problems. Going back to the mask I mentioned, most of you like to put on a brave face and not reveal how you’re really doing. There’s a LOT of feelings flying around inside, but most people wouldn’t know by looking at you. Some of you do this because of social or family pressure; living with people who don’t understand emotional and mental health. You may have internalized the idea of sweeping everything under the rug and holding it in, or you may do this to keep the peace and avoid hurtful words. Most of the time when these kinds of issues come up in my readings I can feel a heavy, melancholic, or scattered energy, but actually this pile’s energy felt kind of light and refreshing all the way through. If this is your default, that explains why you use this as a mask or why people expect it of you. However, you guys have to give space to process your heavier emotions! It’s not easy at all and neither is giving up coping mechanisms. But to restore balance to your mindset, life approach, and discipline, you must confront that sometimes life feels like a battle. That’s not a bad thing even if it makes you feel bad; it’s necessary for true growth. A lot of you need to stand up for yourself, and this may manifest as tough conversations or arguments. I’m not suggesting you HAVE to go argue with someone—especially if you don’t feel safe, but do analyze the way you can show up for yourself. Look at the ways you have stomped or lessened yourself for the sake of someone else who doesn’t have your inner wellbeing in mind. This also includes standing up to yourself; when your mind tries to enable unhealthy habits you can say no! Even though it won’t necessarily be easy, this is what may help you escape feeling frazzled or tormented. But instead of escaping, you’ll be actually working through it. Your oracle cards are suggesting you may also cling onto past ideals. For example, you may hold onto people you’ve known for a long time even though you no longer have a healthy relationship. Instead of biting your tongue just to keep things the same, say what’s on your mind! If the relationship relies on you never being truthful or authentic, then it’s just a relationship between the other person and the persona you created, not you and them. If you do struggle with dissociation or mental health, I encourage you to see what mental health resources are accessible to you! Good luck pile one, I know you can do it :]
Extra Details: partying or outings as a coping mechanism, using humor to avoid looking hurt, addictive coping (I’m not really getting substances, just unhealthy habits), doesn’t vent to others (maybe you used to but stopped), laughing or smiling when you’re angry (also angry crying), hiding a big temper, always distracting yourself, very heavy nostalgia, not liking the person you’ve grown up to be. You might collect, want to collect, or make little trinkets, like charms? Some of you read tea leaves or charm cast. Ending relationships, trying to remain lighthearted, people changing beyond recognition, living near the woods or forest. A really fast moving relationship (or new business?). Some of you guys might feel like a token friend or partner. People pleasing (specifically by not defending yourself or showing your real personality). Holding on to a long gone past
☽
Pile 2:
Cards: The Moon, the High Priestess, 4 of hearts rx, Maturity, Consciousness, Compromise, Past Lives (the Moon again!), Sharing (Queen of Action), 9 of cups, Choices
The Message: hi pile two!! I love you guys’ energy, it was so refreshing and sweet 🥰 You have recently gone through a major inner transformation! This feels like a spiritual awakening, but it might also be mental and emotional. Either way, you went into this period of turning internally to find answers in yourself, and this triggered something that feels like a breath of fresh air in you? You could’ve felt like you were living inauthentically before, and now it’s like you “remembered” who you are. There’s this new, inner spring of energy, joy, or creativity, I can even feel it energetically. You’re a breath of fresh air to those around you too. The Moon in your reading (you got it twice!) is speaking about your newfound knowledge. For the spiritual folks, this seems to represent an upgrade in intuition. If you’re not spiritual, you might just “know” yourself better. You’re looking at the world in a new way now that you’ve “found” yourself, but I feel there’s a decision making you feel stuck. You’ve been trying to compromise yourself or put off these choices, but your cards are clearly showing you know what must be done (with the high priestess and the four of hearts rx). For a lot of you, you’ve changed to the point you can no longer comfortably associate with the same people or environments, but you’ve been trying to hold on. You might be trying to not appear too different or strange. Some of you want to pursue spirituality more but have been unsure. Whatever your individual situation is, The Moon and the “compromise” card are asking you to be true to this version of yourself you’ve discovered. Like the High Priestess, this pile “sees through” the veil or illusions of The Moon now. A new external change is waiting to match your internal one; you’re called to act accordingly with the knowledge you’ve learned about yourself.
Extra Details (these have a lot of spiritual beliefs in them so if that is not for you or makes you confused, just skip!): lemonade (pink)?, really liking the color pink or having a pink room, or liking a soft aesthetic. Seeing 6, 266, or 18 a lot. Wanting to start a business or social media page, especially a spiritual one. Accepting your gender identity or yourself in general. New beliefs or belief system. There’s a lot of clairaudience, clairvoyance, and insightful dreams in this pile. You may have or be returning to a belief in reincarnation, or feel like you’ve discovered a past life memory. Some feel like you shared that life with one person in particular from your present? A few feel like you were royal in a past life, but you don’t really care about that as much as you see it in a wider perspective (which is good! This is a very specific message I picked up on). You might’ve noticed an upgrade to your spiritual gifts/intuition before you went through this transformation, which could’ve freaked you out. Meditating a lot (maybe not anymore but during the “awakening”). A positive nihilism—realizing petty things don’t matter as much. Lots of self love and love in general. Calm after the storm. Some of you may be into STEM; I’m getting marine biology, and someone specifically loves shellfish 😀?? (maybe eating them too…)
☽
Pile 3:
Cards: The Moon, The Hanged Man rx, 4 of swords, Comparison (5 of mind), Fighting (Knight of Mind), King of Swords rx, the Emperor, 5 of wands, Courage (Strength), The Lovers, Enthusiasm (Sun in Sagittarius, 9th house), Who in the World Are You?, Follow the White Rabbit
The Message: hi pile three! If you already felt drawn to pile 1 I encourage you to take a look as there’s similar themes (though yall’s energy feels a bit “lighter”). Much like that pile, your Moon card message is about the illusions you indulge in. The environments or people around you feel very chaotic or competitive, like a space that pits people against each other or promotes conflicts. This could be a workplace or internship, for example. But I feel the tension is more elevated than you’d expect in that kind of environment; it takes its toll on you and jumbles your thoughts. This pile feels disenfranchised somehow, like others coerce you into a certain position, take power away from you, or backstab you. You may close your eyes to this behavior by making excuses as to why others do this, or pretend things are better than they are. A major lesson for this pile is standing up for yourself. People pleasing can help you get through unpleasant minor interactions but shouldn’t be a way of life at the expense of yourself. It’s very emphasized that you might not feel up to the task, and this is partly because the aspect of you that’s courageous and enduring is fragmented from the rest of your identity. It’s not nonexistent, it’s just not readily acknowledged and there’s a difference. All the bravery and strength you need to show up for yourself is already there, waiting to be tapped into. You may not be used to allowing this version of yourself to exist, and that’s partly what’s causing the inner turmoil and confusion. Overcoming this challenge can open up many paths; you may find yourself feeling curious about opportunities you would've never pursued as the “old” you (possibly traveling or moving for a job? It’ll lighten your mental burden at least). When you truly accept yourself and understand there’s internal things no one can take away, then sometimes no words are needed. Your energy and actions will speak for themselves, even if others refuse to understand.
Extra Details: likes cartoons and anime a lot, spent a lot of your life on the internet—especially preteen + teen years, and especially tumblr and vine (this is more directed at millennials and older gen-z where this doesn’t automatically apply to everybody lol). Tiktok or internet humor, glasses with thick frames, indecisiveness. Some of you could’ve worked at a haunted house or a Halloween fair/amusement park? Or gone to a fun Halloween party. Could’ve also worked at a water park. Your job could be very rigorous or leave you physically and mentally exhausted (some of you are baristas?); you might work with or near water. Some of you are in a very passionate relationship and taking back power over your life will positively benefit it. Funnily, when I was pulling my oracle words for you guys, “the moon” came out (again) and also the word “fruit.”—if you get too caught up in facades and masks, you become oblivious to potential blessings there for your “authentic” self only. Or literally some of you like to eat fruit outside during night time lol. May like to analyze dreams for messages. May have an “if I don’t pay attention it can’t hurt me” mindset
Pile 4:
Cards: The Moon, Impossible Things, Law is not Justice rx, Nature Communication, Postponement (4 of mind), Adventure (page of rainbows), Intuition (Mercury in Cancer, 4th house), Loss (Saturn in Pisces, 12th house), 4 of hearts rx
The Message: hello pile four! Some of you may have felt drawn to pile 2 as there’s a few similar details. The message the Moon wants to give you today is more of a reminder than anything. I see a change in your approach to life. Some of you could have had very black and white thinking about the universe and spirituality before, or you might have felt like the universe was out to get you. Now, it seems you’ve shed this type of thinking, either by taking a more neutral/positive stance towards the universe or by trusting your intuition to navigate life’s challenges. I see many of you pray, ask for signs, or look for the answers to your questions in nature. Some of you meditate for clarity about questions. There’s a significance about working together with another force to get things done (whether this is your outer and inner self, higher vs regular self, conscious and subconscious, you + the universe or God, etc). Many of you are not used to approaching life in this way, and previous self-sabotaging or overly-hesitant tendencies are carrying over. You may feel stuck on what you’re leaving behind, but for most of you it seems these things already ended. For example, some of you are nostalgic about relationships, but it seems you already don’t talk to these people anymore or you’re not on good terms. Or, someone passed away and you’re torn between staying in the environment that included them versus moving to new things. You’re being reminded to both trust yourself and also not get caught in a web of your own thoughts. Have you nurtured the childlike curiosity and wonder that’s trying to work its way out of you, or have you only been focused on some kind of perfect planning? Overthinking the “destination” can become a procrastination technique. The journey is also important as that’s where your growth occurs. You don’t have to keep thinking or asking for a thousand signs until you arrive at a perfect answer [never]; know you can handle the imperfect, too.
Extra Details: a long-term relationship that ended a while ago (a divorce for some), lots of manifestors, witches, and channelers in this pile, atheist or former atheist, not having any friends or close relationships right now (possibly because of new beliefs), feeling lonely or hesitant due to lack of support, LOTS of painters or visual artists here (this could be what you’re hesitant to pursue?), a very specific message I’m getting is someone could have lost the ability to make art for a while (because of health or loss of materials?), going on new medication or considering it, game design, meeting people in games/mmos/on twitch, leaving a job (especially because of the people or drama), temporary jobs, working with a crush or friend, remote work (some of you could be digital nomads or wanting that lifestyle?), very dark hair, makeup artist, beauty school, working at a hair salon, visiting your friends’ job, art or beauty as a coping mechanism
☽
#tarot#pick a pile#pick a card#pick an image#pick a picture#tarot pac#pac#channeled message#channeled reading#collective reading#free tarot#intuitive reading#pick a number#energy reading#tarot community#tarot reading#tarot cards#tarot reader#free tarot reading#intuitive message
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Pick-a-card: What kind of lover you are attracting?
Hello everyone, I'm back (kind of?) to deliver my first love reading ever! 👀🔥 This PAC will look into what kind of romantic (but also platonic) relationship you are inviting to your life with your current energy. Basically, we will see what personality traits you like about each other and what makes your relationship work. Be mindful that your energy changes over time, and with this collective reading, only take what resonates 🍀✨
If you want to book a personal reading with me, check out my pinned post. There you will also find the masterlist of all my free PAC! Enjoy~ 🌞
🐱Pick a pile/image you feel most drawn to🐱
Pile 1. Pile 2. Pile 3.
Pile 1: Queen of Swords, 6 of Pentacles, 4 of Swords
First of all, the kind of lover you're attracting are drawn to you by your sharp wits, as well as your fierce and independent nature. Where others find your rough exterior difficult to deal with, this person finds charm and wisdom. They like how argumentive and opinionated you are, like you won't be afraid to speak up for the underdogs and can be real protective around your loved ones. In turn, you might like this person for their generous and forgiving nature. Though their ways of living might trigger your protective instinct at first, like how could someone be so comfortable laying their heart bare? What if someone take advantages of them?? (Lol) But soon enough, you will learn their kindness didn't come from naivety, but their rich life experiences; they are someone emotionally mature and capable to give and receive love from a healthy headspace. As someone who had to navigate through life with careful calculation and always on alert, you will grow to trust this person to mean what they say and be genuine with you throughout your relationship. Fundamentally, you both see each other as a sanctuary. You know the other got your back in the end of the day, and got to "recharge" just by spending time together. Platonic or romantic, this seems to be a wholesome connection that helps you stay grounded during turbulent time.
Pile 2: 4 of Cups reversed, Page of Swords, The Moon reversed
The first thing came up when I read your cards is how it feels like you guys meet/interact with each other in a highly specific environment. Meaning, you don't neccessarily have access to each other's personal life or have constant communication, but just expect to see each other at particular time and space. You could easily be classmate or colleagues, or are sharing a mutual friend. I hear some of you would refer to each other to a third person with a really specific nickname, for example "that guy who takes double expresso" or sth like that. You like this person because they're a social-butterfly with a lotta energy. They often poke fun with you and are fairly successful. On their side, they find you interesting, despite the first impression of you being quite standoffish. You managed to take them aback several times with some witty/funny remarks. They think you have a lot to offer, long as others put effort to help break the ice. This relationship seems to be of a casual and light-hearted nature. It sounds strange but, it just works when neither parties know where they are going, nor do they try too hard to stir the boat somewhere specific. It's the kind loose committal relationship that deepen slowly overtime, like the sediment at the bottom of a river.
Pile 3: 2 of Swords, Strength, Temperance reversed
The person you're attracting seems to be someone you would usually consider as "out of your league". Unlike you who always strike for a harmony in a group, this person has a strong and upfront personality, though I won't describe them as unkind or selfish. Quite the opposite, they are incredibly wise and have a big heart of an advocate. In your eyes, they have accomplished a lot of admirable goals with their talent second to their tenacity and hard work. Comparing to them, you might find yourself too indecisive and easily flustered to step out of your comfort zone. On the other hand, they see you as someone with many contradictions and complex inner world. In conversation with you, they can tell how you have many different interests and potentials, yet more often than not surrender your choices to the circumstances or other people. On the surface, it seems like a "I can fix them" kind of attraction, but at the same time I don't sense a strong desire to force themselves in your life from this person. In other words, they are not someone who would force others to change in order to match them. But they will wait and see if you will break out of the comfort zone, or from the harmony of "how things should be", with your own conviction. If anything, they want to be one of your conscious choice, not an convenient option due to the circumstances.
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“Toby/ other characters would be an abuser!1!” A talk on why that pisses me off
Hi. My name is Seirei. I don’t want to share super personal shit on the internet, but due to certain factors in my life I have BPD. (this is NOT self diagnosis. I have been to a professional and for now they think I have this due to certain trauma/ symptoms I’ve shown) This is part of the cluster B personality type. That being said Toby and many other creepypasta characters either canonically have ASPD/ BPD or it’s a generally accepted headcanon that they do. Now this in itself doesn’t bother me if it’s done well and with research. But the problem is most ppl just slap these labels onto them without doing the proper research. I’ve gotten multiple comments on my TikTok like “well I think Toby is an abuser bc he has ASPD/ BPD” I hate that. I hate that so much. You guys say it’s for “realism” but you’re just demonizing mental disorders. You’re demonizing people like me. In you having your “realism” youre hurting me and ppl in the cluster B personality type. ASPD/ BPD doesn’t instantly make you an abuser. These are personality disorders brought on trauma. Especially trauma with parents/ family. People with ASPD/ BPD know that we’re not well all the time. We’re suffering from disorders that affect our lives. From trauma/ experiences that we didn’t ask for. These are DISORDERS. These aren’t fake edgy illnesses that you can slap onto a character with no thought when you want them to be angsty. For example when ppl say “Toby would be an abuser/ not be capable of love because of his ASPD and he went through abuse in his past” not only are you taking away the depth of his character, you’re just straight up demonizing mental disorders. If you read his story, he loves his mom and sister so much. People with ASPD can love. But it does cause him to be obnoxious and rude. But this isn’t coming from a place of malice. He’s a traumatized man w a disorder! This isn’t me saying Toby can do no wrong and he’s 100% healthy. Toby definitely has issues and I’d never erase that. But to call him an abuser because he has ASPD is so gross and you’re just demonizing ASPD to be edgy without doing research on it or the cluster B personality type in general. As I said before, people with cluster B personality type KNOW we have disorders. We live with them every day. They affect our lives, our relationships, ourselves. We know that we fuck up and what we do isn’t healthy all the time. We KNOW. We’re not doing it because we’re “abusers” we’re suffering and hurting. Again this isn’t me saying that everyone with BPD/ ASPD is a good person who’s willing to do the work and grow. There are bad people with these disorders. But that doesn’t mean everyone who has them are instantly abusive. I’m not an abuser at all. Never have been and never will be. But BPD does affect me and the way I act that can come off as hurtful/ unhealthy and I KNOW THAT. Im always actively putting in the work to be better, like a lot of people with ASPD/ BPD. Just because we have these disorders doesn’t instantly mean we can’t change/ be better. Doesn’t mean we’re not humans with emotions/ trauma of our own. Toby obviously had to do some kind of inner work to be able to be with Clockwork the way kastoway portrayed them. (If it’s canon or not is irrelevant here)When you say shit like “Toby is abusive bc of ASPD/ BPD” that’s what you’re telling us you think of us. You see us and treat us like monsters but then talk about how much you love Toby/ other characters for having our very real disorder. ASPD/ BPD can be seen as two sides of the same coin. They have so many similarities but are shown in different ways. Do proper research before you talk about mental health because you’re stigmatizing/ demonizing disorders that are already looked down upon. Toby does canonically have ASPD and possibly BPD but it’s written into his character pretty well(as well as a 13 year old in the 2010s can do) and now that ppl are older we can actually analyze his character/story correctly. But Jeff and many other characters still aren’t getting this same treatment and they need it.Do better.
#creepypasta#creepypasta hcs#creepypasta characters#creepypasta fandom#creepypasta headcanon#crp#ticci toby#ticci toby headcanons#ticci toby hc#ticci toby hcs#jeffthekillerhcs#jeffthekiller#seireitonin
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My Arthur: Some Night Thoughts
In between the cancellation of The Acolyte (there's still hope, Clone Wars came back) and the premiere of Rings of Power S2 -- and I PROMISE you that each and every dudebro I blocked in these situations on the former bird app either had crypto in bio or a timeline that was entirely focused on a sports team... I mean, why not think about RDR2? I want to think what it means that so many players speak of MY Arthur, like we all have little pocket Arthurs as pets. "I like my Arthur to be a scary bad guy so I keep him shaved bald." "Well, my Arthur looks his best with Level 7 or 8 hair and a Level 1 or 2 beard." "This time I'm making sure that my Arthur has the best satchel and the Legend of the East outfit." "I always pamper my Arthur before a hard mission. I buy him a ribeye steak at a saloon, get him a bath, and let him sleep just one more night in a hotel. I feed him up to Overweight before Guarma and Chapter 6." "My Arthur is high honor. He would never do XYZ." "Oh yeah? I think my Arthur loves being low honor and beating the crap out of people." "Weird. My Arthur's favorite missions are the dinosaur bones." All of these Arthurs are different and yet the same. All of them are doomed. You have to rewind the timeline and go back to a Chapter 2 save to have a healthy Arthur who can chat and sing with his compadres at the campfire. Nobody's Arthur, until you take him out of the game and into some of the absolutely and utterly beautiful fanart and fanfics, can succeed with Mary Linton, or Charles for that matter. The R* canon Arthur is always doomed. What does it say about us that we can't bear to let go of him, even though his own dialogue tells us he clearly sees the writing on the wall as early as Chapter 1? Is it just the natural human abhorrence of the reality that we too will someday die without accomplishing all that we wanted to? I can relate. Big mood, Arthur. In fragmenting into all of these disparate Arthurs -- Roger Clark has pointed out more people own copies of the game than live in Ireland -- maybe that's how the egregore, the Arthur conjured from the collective consciousness of millions of individual players, stays alive. Many writers of fanfics want their Arthur to be theirs. Not just a rough fuck on daddy's kitchen counter, although I've read that story too, and not just the Not Enough Beds trope, though that too was a fine story. They want to smash Arthur because who doesn't? But they want him to love them, despite R* Arthur having not one single solitary relationship skill. This new Arthur teaches you to draw (the preponderance of Arthur fics I've read involve a "you" reader). Your wish that he address you as he does a mare, "That's mah good girl," comes resplendently true. Sometimes, such are the fix-him powers of You that You and he escape the gang before the name Thomas Downes can be uttered. Arthur's heart beats for You and You alone. Sometimes he protects You from danger. Sometimes he accepts a free sample of sponge cake from You in a bakery. All of these Arthurs go out Arthuring all over the wrong but familiar RDR2 America, often with You at their side. Sometimes You even find him on the cliffside before his rattling last breath, and drag him to safety and a warm, dry climate. One Arthur I read was even saved by a doctor in Mexico with the only available treatment of the period -- collapsing part of the lung -- and recovered fully, having four kids with Sadie Adler and saving most of the RDR world along the way.
You can have your Arthur and play him too. Indeed, a fresh shot of Roger Clark's bravura performance -- combined, as he is the first to point out, with the animators' work, for example giving him the most delicious lower lip -- compounds the infatuation should it threaten to recede.
People suffer profound grief over this game. Of course, it is their own grief from non-digital life: "It is Margaret you mourn for" -- Gerard Manley Hopkins. Perhaps the loss of their Arthur and the way his surviving friends gradually adjust to the loss helps people make room for the holes in their own lives. But that's the thing. That's the comfort at the bottom of the grief pit.
Because once you find your Arthur, including within yourself (I don't just mean cosplay, but I've seen people of all genders don the stained blue workshirt, the suspenders, the neckerchief, the goddamn hat, and wear Arthur on their bodies)... you can't ever really lose him. He changes you. And that may be the strangest and most wonderful thing you can say about a work of fiction.
Keep sharing your Arthurs. The chibis, the young Arthurs cradling poor Isaac or reading to child John Marston, the AUs, the low-honor black coyotes and the high-honor 14-point stags. Marthur, Charthur, Albert Mason x Arthur. All the versions of him. Because they're also You.
#red dead redemption 2#rdr2#rdr2 community#rdr fanart#rdr2 arthur morgan#rdr2 arthur#rdr2 artwork#rdr2 fandom#rdr2 fanfic#rdr2 photography#rdr2 photomode#in case this wasn't clear I love your art of him#every version of him#i love your fanfic#bring me your smut your fluff your angst your hurt-and-comfort#bring me your canon ships and your crack pairings#marthur#charthur#albert mason#wishful thinking#all your empathy for a guy made of acting and pixels#fandom is a great way to be a human
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Universal - Love Astro Notes 💌
┗━━━━ • ✿ • ━━━━┛
🎵A little less conversation and a little more touch my body 🎵
🎵 Cause I'm so into you, into you, into you🎵
💌-💌-💌-💌-💌--💌-💌-💌-💌-💌-💌-💌-💌-
♥️ Venus in Scorpio natives love very deep and a lot, these people feel very intense the things and not always have luck in love (Venus is in detriment in Scorpio) and their love life might not always might be the best but they hope one day they can find the love of their love (You can feel thus energy if you have Venus in the 8th house or Venus at Scorpio Degrees 8°, 20°. )
♥️ If your partner has their moon sign the same sign as your south node that can mean you had some past life connections i know this since it was a subject on Reddit long time ago , example: If your boyfriend has a Cancer Moon and you have Cancer South node, you might have some past life together. And this can go vice versa: You can have Aries Moon and your boyfriend has a Aries South Node 💌😍
♥️ 18+ Mars in Fire Signs might have a thing hugging and kissing while making rough eye contact 👀 I'm looking at you Mars in Aries ♈🐏 also boys with those placements love to slap their partner's🍑
♥️ Having Moon in the 7th house can make you craving for having a partner and also applies to Libra Moons because they really need Partnerships in this life and need to make connections and feel love, they crave for having a good healthy relationship and feel loved for real, they just want someone to love for their lives ( I'm with you in this and i know how does it feel besties we are strong ♥️)
♥️ Pluto - Venus aspects but mostly conjunction because it feels the most intense: they crave for feeling deep love and to feel loved and to finally feel that they are loved for real and not only for words, they want to give love and be hugged 24/7
♥️ Moon/Venus In Earth Signs take relationships very seriously ans valuable so they might take break-ups very hard because of this thing and because they love deep, i want to tell you that everything happens for a reason and with a reason remember to trust your intuition since Earth Moon's intuition is insane, lots of love for you earth angels 😇♥️
♥️ Moon in Water Signs is a indicator that your love is very deep and sensual but in the same time it can hit people like a tsunami if they try to hurt you and your feelings. Your heart calm waves can transform very fast into a tsunami and destroying everything.
♥️ Venus in Gemini are those type of people who have a very pleasant voice, their voice might be actually unforgettable and you can get stucked in your head 😂❤️
♥️ Ascendant at 4°, 16°, 28° degrees can make the native fall very easy in love and being blinded by love sometimes. If they fall in love they can think that person can be their soulmate but is not always like that, they can just be blinded by love and not see the real things
♥️ Venus at 1°,13°,25° degrees makes the native very charming and soooo beautiful, those people can have such beautiful face features, in love they can be very admired by their partners
♥️ Venus at 11° and 23° degrees can met their spouse/future partners on social media/internet, is very often to met new people on internet with those degrees. It can also mean that you and your specific person can work both in technology related jobs and to met there!❤️❤️
♥️ Ascendant at 6°/18° degrees can struggle with feeling love and they can be critical over love topics sometimes, since is a Virgo Degree these people are natural sensualist humans and they can actually have attractive features who might make a lot of people interested in them but they can just be very critical sometimes about it 😭
♥️ Natives with Venus in Earth Signs/Venus in the 2nd/6th/10th houses can have gifting as their love language, their love to buy things for others and to make them happy. They love and seek for luxury things and they are very sweet and romantic 🥹♥️
♥️Natives with Venus in the 4th and 10th houses want to have the traditional type of relationship, like the couple having fun together and making memories together while enjoying their life at the fullest ♥️
♥️Natives with Moon in the 4th/8th/12th houses or Moon in Cancer, Scorpio or Pisces are those type of people who love to make memories together and keep them very special in their heart, they can be extremely sensitive going back and remembering things from their past 🥹♥️
♥️Sun - Venus aspects/Parallels including/ tend to be very lovely and warm people...With a big BIG BIG HEART omg o just wanna hug them they deserve the biggest hug ever for their warm energy 🌺, they are so nice and so generous is unbelievable sometimes
♥️ Why are Gemini and Libra placements so flirty like hold on cuz you make blush 🫣 like they really know how to make someone feel appreciated and good 🫣
♥️Venus in Pisces/Venus at 12°, 24° degrees are likely to make a soul bounding with their partners because of their attachment, they can be too attached and this can bound them to their partners ♥️🫣
♥️Libra Venus/Libra Placements/Libra Moon hold the power to have kinks for choking and spanking because they are so clingy and romantic in the same time like in the next second you say "Are you gonna spank me now or what😭"
♥️Natives/Men with Leo Venus/Cap Venus are the gentlemen of the zodiac like hands down they are the protectors of their families and partners, they have respect for everyone, they radiate boss/daddy energy is just 🫣🫣🫣🫣♥️
♥️ Scorpio Placements/Venus - Pluto aspects just tend to fall in love with people who hurt them 😭 most times they will end or ended with someone toxic for them and someone who is manipulating
♥️Water placements are likely going for heart over mind due to their feelings and emotions they have for people. Because they tend to love very intense and them being very sacrificing even in love relationships it can be hard for them to choose whether to think with their heart or their mind ♥️
♥️Venus in the 1st/3rd houses can have very delicate and gracious voices 😵, their voice is really stunning and these natives can possess talents related to singing 🎤👄
♥️Venus/Jupiter in the 4th house can give you a very lovely partner who is very protective and intuitive, someone who loves being around you and helping you when you need it (Tho i think having those Planets in the 4th house is very cute) omg forgot to mention in women charts Jupiter can show your husband if you have Jupiter in 4th house there is a chance to have someone you know from long ago to be your partner/spouse even someone from your childhood 🙌🏼♥️
♥️Pluto/Mars - Venus aspects the definition of "down and dirty" they literally embody this thing so much, very intense, very deep, very lovely and possessiveness vibes going on there 👑
♥️ Jupiter/Venus in the 9th house can be so beneficial for a marriage/relationship they are really strong in a vedic chart, beside meeting your partner in foreign places, this house can also give you the partner who is always looking for fun and adventures with you, because the 9th house is also the house of God, the God can protect your relationship/marriage and make it to be like "happy ending" 👑🌺
♥️Even if Venus repsents the wife in a man's chart, this planet can also represent your love life in general aswell no matter what gender you have, Venus still influences your love life in the house and sign is in🌺♥️
♥️ Juno [3] making an harmonious aspect with the Midheaven means that the public can see you as a very lovely couple and as a couple who is very love giving to eachother, you can attract others attentions very fast with you spouse and also your spouse can be very influential in your career/job
♥️Juno [3] aspects Neptune/Juno in 12th house you relationship/marriage can be that deep that you 2 will be very bounded with the spirituality and both being very intuitive, 2 sensbile souls trying to love eachother in a world where love gets faded away because the world can be very cruel/evil/bad. Your spouse can be very intuitive and spiritual
♥️ Neptune/Uranus in the 12th house can give prophetic dreams and can dream about their spouses and partners, of course this happens with the time but if you seek for a partner, then you can end up dreaming about them or receiving signs that they are close to you even if you 2 didn't even met (angels numbers, colors, texts, etc)
♥️🌹♥️🌹♥️🌹♥️🌹♥️🌹♥️🌹♥️🌹♥️🌹♥️🌹
Hello queens and kings ♥️🌺👑 todayyy is a new day and that means a new post coming for you 😍🥰 it was such a long post to make that i couldn't add anymore gifs 😭 this post was kind of unusual because it doesn't have a specific aesthetic just lovely couples photos and gifs. I hope you like this new aesthetic content 😍👑. And i also hope you all will have a good start of the week and many blessings and happy things to come in your way ♥️🥰
"You don't have to seek love in other people, search deep into your heart and learn to love yourself and to treat you right, you are not just a human, you are a source of life and the creation of love, you are brave, confident, powerful and beautiful, never forget that🌺♥️🌺
Harmoonix 💋
#astro#zodiac#zodiac signs#notes#aesthetic#disney#couples#love#i love her#i love him#birth chart#natal chart#vedic chart#spirituality#houses in astrology#aries#taurus#gemini#cancer#leo#virgo#libra#scorpio#sagittarius#capricorn#aquarius#pisces
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NO BECAUSE I NEED TO TALK ABOUT ASCENDED ASTARION FOR A SECOND
I feel a lot of people think he just lost his soul when he went through with the ascension (myself included) but replaying for the third time (this time w/o rushing lol), it’s more obvious that he’s still him.
Of course, there’s a very obvious difference between spawn astarion and ascendant astarion in his dialogue, especially if you romance him. Ascendant astarion, in the state that he is immediately after ascension, is absolutely not a healthy representation of what a relationship should look like and should not be desired. Obviously some people think he’s hot but for the sake of the argument just go along w me here.
Regardless I don’t think the ascension changed him THAT much as a person. In fact I’d argue that NOT ascending changes him more (for the better). Ascending just made parts of him (the less forgiving traits) that much more prominent.
Looking back on Act 1 during the tiefling celebration (assuming you don’t side w the goblins), he clearly says he doesn’t revel in being a hero. And throughout the game he makes it very clear he’s willing to be selfish because he hasn’t been allowed to be selfish for the past 200 years.
And this selfishness manifests into him wanting power so he won’t face the same environment again. He’s always wanted power, and if he chooses not to ascend, he’s letting go of that part of himself. Not only does he go against what he’s believed for most of his life as a spawn, but accepts that being a spawn is okay with him. If he chooses to ascend, he’s amplifying that power hungry aspect of himself, putting act1/2 astarion’s personality in the basement, but he’s still there.
This applies to how possessive he is of Tav after the ascension too. He’s always been possessive, even if he doesn’t make it alarmingly obvious. Though rather than possessive I’d describe it more as a fear of being abandoned in act 1/2.
For example, when you drop the Githyanki Crèche on him he gets genuinely annoyed for a few seconds and then he thanks you for apologizing in a much softer tone, like he’s trying to repair any damage he might’ve done by getting mad at you. At the time, he still thinks of himself as weak, and therefore cannot bring himself to be possessive since he has no power to back it up. Instead, he manifests these feelings by doing everything in his power to please you even if it goes against his emotions. And while he doesn’t particularly love Tav going off with other people (as seen with the dialogue after you sleep with Mizora), he pretends that he’s okay with it just to keep you by his side. This tendency to please Tav in hopes they’ll stay is also seen in how he asks for your permission before he kills the Gur at the hag’s house.
Now, once he does ascend, he realizes he has the power to support all these darker emotions he feels. It turns twisted as a result, bringing us to the ascendant astarion we have today.
Spawn astarion, however, lets go of these emotions in a way, or displays them in a more healthy manner. It’s why his arc feels much more satisfying this way because ascendant astarion isn’t really changing, just adjusting. Spawn astarion goes through more raw character development which is also why I cannot bring myself to ascend him even in my evil durge play through!!
anyway yeah I made this account to do stuff like this hope you enjoyed my little rant🫶 this is just my personal opinion obviously but pls lmk if anyone thinks differently bg3 lore is so interesting
#bg3 astarion#baldur's gate 3#baldur's gate astarion#astarion x tav#astarion x reader#astarion ancunin#baldur's gate spoilers
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im sorry but i can never be a lyanna stan guys.
just lemme explain.
obviously this is only if she willingly went w rhaegar
To begin with, the situation in its simplest form is that Rhaegar and Elia are married, amicable yet not in love, and Rhaegar runs off with Lyanna, causing chaos to ensue amongst the realm.
Even if no war occured and everything was fine, how can Lyanna try to justify running away with a married man, especially on the way to her brothers wedding which feels very selfish, even if Brandon didn’t want to marry Cat, like she still ruined their wedding day.
Not to mention, that running with Rhaegar meant that shes inserted herself into his marriage which is Elia’s place. How nonsensical it is to run away with a married man and somehow marry him!
There’s two routes people go to justify it, and I’ll explain why I think they suck:
1) E-R-L is a polygamous marriage: This is not appeasable to the realm at all! Nobody will accept that. The only reason Aegon+Rhaenys+Visenya were accepted was because they were conquering Westeros, and like you can’t say shit about the guys conquering you!! Also the Targs were on thin ice then, and Maegor also tried, and look what happened afterwards!
2) E-R was annulled and R-L are married: I don’t think this is reasonable at all. Considering that Rhaegar is only HEIR, just like Daemon, for example. Both wanted annulments and both need the permission from the King and/or High Septon, but also considering how the likes of Aegon IV couldn’t annul his own marriage, do you really think a measly heir could?! At least in Daemon’s situation, he had no children, but as Aegon IV and Rhaegar both had kids (Elia giving birth twice in 3 years) theres no grounds for annulment, and it would disinherit his children potentially anyway, or even start a second Dance. As soon as you have a second wife, whether polygamous, annulled or dead first wife, war will be almost inevitable between the potential heirs.
Also Ik its not possible.. but can we stop with the E/R/L shipping in a serious manner (crackship is fine but in canon is 😐)
Like genuinely thinking mid-20s Elia would want to romance a 14 year old girl, would be fine with her husband romancing said 14 year old, or join in together, is so crazy to me. Like, yes Rhaegar is very much in the pedo-realm but why would Elia also follow suit??!
And like not to be a huge Robert Baratheon stan here (i hate GOT era him) but you can’t deny that it is the rebellion+it’s repercussions on his life, that change him so heavily into this twisted abusive, pedo man. He was not a great guy pre-rebellion, he slept around, was loud and rowdy, but I feel like you can’t really say that Lyanna somehow predicted that he would be this abusive evil man, tbh it seems like she just disliked his promiscuity which is valid, but in doing the same to Elia, her point gets invalidated in my eyes.
Also next point is the age-situation.
Now i know that obviously in a real life situation, a 14 year old girl is at no blame for the groomer actions of the adult…. however just look at how GRRM perceives this. like not as an “oh medieval girls married at 14, its fine” because they were still mentally children… but i mean how GRRM perceives relationships akin to R-L and characters by Lyannas age in ASOIAF-verse.
Ok so GRRM thinks R-L is romantic, which means that the groomer undertones aren’t necessarily meant to be there, and its meant to be more of a Romeo-Juliet situation (which heavily fucked over Romeos girl Rosaline ie Elia). He also believes Dany-Drogo and San-San is healthy, so I don’t think age heavily affects characters romantic feeling and actions much then.
Then if we see character Lyanna’s age, they’re treated as adults (yes some do have child impulses but overall adults). You have Robb acting impulsively like a kid, but ultimately being treated as an adult and being killed. I feel like even though they have kid impulses, they’re meant to get adult consequences for their actions.
Also ages as a whole is fucked up in ASOIAF in comparison to real world, like you have baby Rickon Stark going feral in Skagos, you have 3 year old Joffrey Velaryon/Strong squaring up to Aemond, and you even have 11 year old Benjicott Blackwood being an absolute beast of a warrior when in the real-world, he’d be just a kid, useless in defence.
#asoiaf#game of thrones#anti rhaegar x lyanna#lyanna stark bashing#elia martell#rhaegar targaryen#rhaegar targaryen bashing#lyanna stark#a song of ice and fire#got#elia martell deserved better
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@moonbiine got me with the Aiden bug
I thought a lot about how to start this and none of them were good so, here's this;
Frowny's Thesis on Aiden Clark having Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) based on the DSM-5 criteria, living with people with BPD (hi dad!), being...me!, and general vibes.
What is BPD?
Borderline Personality Disorder is defined by a prolonged disturbance of function marked by depth and variability of mood, pattern of unstable personal relationships, unstable self-image, marked impulsivity, and other symptoms. They can manifest in very different ways (the way it appears between my dad and my grandma for example is not the same), but generally includes this.
1. Fear of Abandonment
Nobody wants to be left behind, that's a given, but for people with BPD this fear can spiral into a paranoid phobia that impacts all their personal relationships. Because BPD is influenced by environmental factors, this often stems from children being abandoned in their youth (ex. My father was the child of a teen pregnancy and his parents couldn't care for him for the first few years of his life, letting him be raised by his grandparents. I also grew up alternatively without my mom and withouty my dad, and once for a time with neither of them)
It's been shown to us before that Aiden's parents are often absent from the house, for even months at a time. He seems very used to this and it's likely he grew up very isolated or passed around between different relatives. And I do think this shows in his attachment style; he is a very clingy and sort of "decides" to hyperfixate on a certain person (Ash *coughs*) in the hopes that they'll become friends, and he does this very quickly. Already so scared of losing Ash on that roof even tho he's only known her for like 3 months at this point. He really can't bear the thought of her not being with him.
On the subject of Ash he's idolized her sooooo bad she's so screwed. Pls the Angelic lighting filter he puts on her?? SHE CANT SAVE YOU AIDEN. YOU HAVE TO DO IT YOURSELF. (But i get it its hard) Ties back into how people with BPD see the world in strict black and white, he can't see Ash's flaws and that's how he defends her so much, she's literally like a savior to him and here comes the disciple complex.
He's been forced to move so many times, he's probably made friends who just couldn't keep up the effort of maintaining a long distance friendship and ghosted him, or even him doing the opposite, pushing people away just to avoid the sting of abandonment again. They can't hurt you if you hurt them first.
2. Unstable self-image.
He bleaches his hair end of story /j
No but really, tell me Aiden doesn't put up a persona- he's gone through the phases from quiet gifted kid to an impulsive extroverted mischievous mess. Don't you just look at him and feel the self-hatred coming off in waves?? Dyeing his hair, getting contacts, the ever present grin that must be painful at this point, it's like he can't...look at himself. Like he doesn't want to look at himself.
He can't even face his own problems; he literally paints a clown face on himself after dying cuz he doesn't want to process his feelings about it lol 🫠
Like genuinely, how exactly does Aiden want to be perceived? What is the point of this facade? For himself? For other people? I think he's just trying to shut away his past and start fresh without having to confront it, but...when the root is rotten, nothing healthy can grow, so he needs to get to the source of his issues.
3. Anger regulation problems
Unpopular opinion probably but he seems so angry to me. It's definitely WAY more present in the early chapters like when he goes tf off on Tyler, he was barely controlling himself there asdfghjkl- but I think it manifests more in him attacking the phantoms, it's obviously an adrenaline thing for him but I think he's taking out a lot of anger at the same time too. Even if some of this anger is coming from a righteous place; the desire to protect his loved ones (which ties into the abandonment too, you are still abandoned even when it wasn't their choice), because peope with BPD see the world as smth very...dangerous, I guess is the word? Even if maybe that doesn't apply to themselves
(Fastpass spoilers)
He's also not above taking his anger out on humans either considering he was about to take Alex's eyes out with that paintbrush and was gonna choke the life outta them-
(Done.)
4. Consistent feelings of sadness/worthlessness.
5. Self-injury, suicidal behaviour, suicidal ideation.
Aiden do be a sadboi even with all the smiley faces on his clothes. I think this is probably smth that was way worse when he was younger that led to that depression where he was locked in his room eating junk food and disassociating, and while he's probably coping with it differently it's still smth he struggles with. I mean shiiiiiit, because of his impulsiveness he does kinda cause problems but God he feels SOOOO goddamn bad about it lahdlsj, he was so guilty about the Ash situation, he probably beat himself up so much about that-
Emotions are very extreme, it's 'similar' to bipolar disorder with manic and depressive episodes, except they happen at a much quicker scale (in the same day for ex.) which seems to me how Aiden only lets himself experience positive emotions even tho he's in a deeply stressful situation (even tho there's good parts too like his friends) because he just can't handle having to fully experience those negative emotions.
Check, check, check! Aiden has zero self preservation instincts, he throws himself off walls, gets up close and personal with phantoms that could easily kill him, actually didn't give a fuck about dying?? Actually ENJOYED IT? But didn't wanna do it again because his Favourite person was worried about him and the absolute high of that feeling completely beat out anything else?? Okay man, we get it, you're living for somebody else at this point-
People with BPD suffer from chronic feelings of emptiness and pain is the best kind of distraction for Aiden (cue: him slamming his forehead on the table because he's bored)
6. Impulsive behaviors (aka a bunch of shit which can be summed up as addictions)
Well, for starters, he's an absolute adrenaline junkie, because he feels so constantly empty Aiden wants something to make him feel alive. And adrenaline is the flawless, biological, factual answer to this. Ergo all his octane hobbies and impulsive behaviors. Ties back into his obsessiveness, which, don't get me wrong this doesn't make him a bad guy or anything, we all get a little obsessed with things sometimes, that's just things humans do- but when you have bpd, it's very...difficult to just STAY happy, like an addiction, when the high wears off, they're empty again.
Maybe a bit of a stretch, but considering all the Ramen packets in his room when he was younger I wouldn't be surprised if he had some sort of ED or binge eats (Same bestie.)
Also for sure a reckless driver I'm 99% sure he crashed all those go-karts he drived before.
---
I don't really know where I'm going with this. It's hard to live with somebody who has BPD, it's hard to live with it yourself, it's hard to see other people go through it even when it's hurting yourself. I hate pushing people away, but you get so caught up in your own thoughts, and it just...happens...and when it's done...you really regret it, but it's too late...and you just wonder if things are better like this, being alone and not hurting anybody anymore, cuz they're certainly happy on their own
I don't think anybody who has bpd is automatically a bad person, they just have things harder than normal. People with BPD....they can be amazing artists, or good with animals, or really very kind. They have very big hearts, thats why they feel so deeply. And I think Aiden is a good person, because he has so much love to give, but has never been given an outlet to express that properly, but you can see him making great strides in learning how, with the help of his friends 🧡
Might edit this later when I get my thoughts more clear it's midnight here lol
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Glowing up: A journey towards self-improvement
The reason I want to glow up is because I am determined to make positive changes in my life. I want to improve my health, enhance my appearance, and become a better version of myself. For as long as I can remember, I've been lazy, mediocre, self-destructive and unkind. But I refuse to be like that any longer. With hard work and dedication, I know I can transform myself into someone I'm proud of. I know it won't be easy, but I'm ready to take on the challenge and become the best possible version of myself.
Part 1:Physical wellness
Inspiration:Pink Pilates Princess and Green Juice Girl
The physical aspect of glowing up goes beyond aesthetics. Although, I won't deny that the main reason is doing it. It's about feeling strong, energized, and confident in your skin. I struggle with chronic migraines, fatigue and Self-destructive behaviours. My self-destructive behaviours are things I unconsciously do to make myself unattractive like binge eating because I want to be skinny but my brain doesn't want me to be skinny because it knows it will make me happy and unconsciously I don't want to be happy. I also cut my hair short because I love long hair and I cut my hair every time it gets long because I secretly hate myself and don't want to be happy. (This probably belongs in the mental wellness part.)My plan to improve my physical health is to lose weight gained from years of binging and become fit.
Goals
Lose almost 30lbs by
Eating porpotioned healthily balanced meals(<1450kcals)
Taking my vitamins
Exercising at least 3hrs a week
Getting 10k steps a day
Sleep at 11pm at latest and wake up at 5/6 am
Develop a skincare routine
Grow my hair back to waist length
Part 2:Mental, Emotional and social wellness
Inspiration:That girl and Clean girl
Mental health is the cornerstone of glowing up. It involves cultivating a positive mindset, managing stress, and fostering resilience. Emotional health involves understanding and managing our emotions in a healthy way. It's about cultivating self-awareness, practicing self-compassion, and developing coping strategies for life's challenges. Social health involves building and maintaining meaningful relationships, setting boundaries, and fostering a sense of belonging. I have struggled with my mental health for a long time. I am diagnosed with depression and I have dealt with binge eating on and off for years. I have low self-esteem and self-worth. I never liked myself since I was young. (I think I know the reason but I don't want to share.)The hatred I felt for myself got externalised into hatred, envy, jealousy and unkindness towards others. I am going to change that by:
Getting a therapist
Self care
Being positive
Thinking before I speak
Practicing gratitude
Clean my room once a day
Meet with friends outside of school at least once a month
Part 3: Spiritual wellness
Inspiration: That Christian girl
Nurturing spiritual health provides a sense of purpose, connection, and inner peace. I was born catholic and went to catholic school from the age of 5 to 11(ages 7-11 were an only-girl school). I became an atheist at 11 and have been struggling with my relationship with God ever since. I was born and raised catholic but I was never properly Cathechized. That is because my parents(My mom is a cradle catholic and my dad was born catholic but became Pentecostal) are lukewarm and don't teach me and my siblings about God, the Bible and the Catholic Church. My parents have had multiple children and have not married. (I don't want them to get married to be honest because they are not right for each other and they aren't the best example of a healthy relationship.) My mom only started regularly attending church because I asked her that we start going. My parents aren't the best example of good Christians. Also, in catholic school days teach you nothing about the catholic church they just read the bible to you every morning, make you pray 3-4 times a day and bring you to church once a week. Catholic school wasn't that bad because catechizing me wasn't their job it was my parents. My goals to become strengthen my relationship with God are:
Attend mass on all Sundays and days of obligation
Pray at least twice a day and before eating
Read the Bible daily
Learn about the catholic church and catechize myself
Got to confession eventually
Do my confirmation
Become a Proverbs 31 woman
Part 4: Intellectual wellness
Inspiration:Academic weapon
Continuous learning and intellectual stimulation are essential components of glowing up. An Academic Weapon is a student who is perceived as particularly successful in academics as a whole. My grades are mediocre but i can easily fix that if i stop being lazy and study more. I am going to:
Study atleat 3hrs a day un top of homework
Have an 8-hour study session once a week.
Read one book a month
Join more clubs
Take every opportunity to learn
Conclusion
Glowing up is not a destination but a lifelong journey of self-discovery and personal growth. By nurturing physical, mental, spiritual, social, emotional, and intellectual health, we can become the best versions of ourselves. Whether you're striving to be that Christian girl, a pink Pilates princess, a green juice girl, clean girl or an academic weapon, remember that the most beautiful glow comes from within.
#that girl#that christian girl#thatchristiangirl#pink pilates princess#pink pilates girl#clean girl#academic weapon#glow up#catholicgirlhood#catholic girl#catholic#catholicism#catholic girlhood#studyblr#glow up journey#sweetasadaisy glow up journey#sweetasadaisy glowsup#health and wellness
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One thing I haven't seen anybody else mention about Dr. Hillary Cass's whole "transition success should be judged by employment success, getting 'out of the house', marriage, and sex life, not happiness" thing is that it's a textbook example of biopower and biopolitical discourse. And I think it's important to be able to take apart what she's doing. Cass is not breaking new ground in the field of transphobia here, she's parroting some of the beliefs that have been causing issues for trans people for decades now. She's doing biopolitics.
This is Foucault theory so I'm giving a very abridged version here: Biopower is power over bodies. As Foucault writes in Vol 1 of the History of Sexuality: Power is no longer about having ultimate dominion over death, but instead about being able to control life itself. In Biopower, power has more than just the threat of death, it has access to our bodies and lives as well. When combined with the concept of the medical gaze, it can be said that medicine is no longer a body of techniques for curing illnesses, but is now an institution with the ability to define "health" and "normality".
In biopolitics, the body becomes a political object, and various technologies, political strategies, and diciplinary techniques operate upon bodies through various institutions in order to shape them and integrate them into society. Ultimately, what is defined as the healthy and valuable body is seen as necessary for the society/nation to thrive. The ideal body is the body of the "ideal citizen", one who fits definitions of "normality".
Within biopower, the purpose of trans healthcare is not to affirm gender or improve the lives of trans individuals. Instead, it is to create "healthy", "productive", "docile", and "normative" bodies that adhere with both the gender binary and understandings of the ideal citizen.
The criteria that Cass states that she thinks the success of transition should be judged by (employment, social involvement, and ability and willingness to participate within heteronormative relationship dynamics) is a list of things expected of "ideal citizens".
In the view of individuals like Cass, who funtion within biomedical discourses, transition isn't about allowing trans people to modify their bodies in ways that bring them joy, better embody their identities, and/or that allow them to feel more like themselves. Transition is instead purely about correcting percived dysfunction, to allow those percived by them as dysfunctional men and women to be transformed into normative, unproblematic, binary adhering, and productive women and men. Options like being non-binary, or using this transition technology to change your body in ways that do not align with medical understandings of binary transition, are seen as invalid, as they create disruption and non-normativity as opposed to 'curing' or 'treating' those things.
Therefore, for people like Cass it only makes sense that the success of transition would be judged by the ability of trans people to adhere to dominant gender norms, productivity, and overall normallity, as opposed to things unrelated to understandings of what "the ideal citizen" is. Y'know, things like happiness, joy, the ability to feel like oneself, etc.
One last point, and this is partially speculation on my part: But I think this is why the fact that trans people face discrimination that makes things like remaining employed and being in healthy relationships much more difficult is ignored by people like Cass. These forms of discrimination are seen as the result of the individuals failure to properly perform and embody "normality". Transphobia is therefore not percived as the fault of a patriarchal cisheteronormative society and culture, but instead a failure of the trans individual and the practice of medical transition.
If it wasn't clear, I think Dr Cass is a hack and that the discourses that inform her positions on trans health issues are not only incorrect, but also act to perpetuate bigotry and social inequality. Fuck Dr Cass, Trans Liberation Now.
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