#i need top surgery so bad

[pisshandkerchief]

I don't want to leave the house because that would require me to put a shirt on

[stuck-in-the-ghost-zone]

every time im sitting here like "damn why am i suddenly really anxious and restless and irritable and its hard to breathe" and then i realize. oh. yeah. ive been wearing my binder for too long

[moier-must-die]

I just wanna wear slutty man tops like just mesh shirts omgg

[lousiee]

starting 2 look like eriks era vash

[catfindr]

i so desperately need to win the lottery or something so i can afford top surgery

this dysphoria is just driving me nuts

[nattoppet-dj]

sorry i disappeared i was mentally ill. still am but better.

got top surgery! recovering. lots going on

feelings are rough. emotional regulation is rough. but i'm still here

[sportsthoughts]

miserable injury update:

[crybabybat]

I need 8 tattoos IMMEDIATELY

[bowenoke]

on tiktok and passed a call of duty fanartist who referenced "the watchers top surgeried grian"

going to start telling people i have a cultural impact based on this One tiktok and when they ask me what i am talking about i will refuse to answer

[famewolf]

speaking of ocd, I think I'm realizing that I truly don't have anxiety and it's literally just my ocd. im not anxious about anything until it involves me and suddenly I'm spiraling

[cahootings]

back at the ortho and my challenge today is to NOT cry

[trebeksfault]

another day battling my sinuses

[jettison-my-gift]

It came to my attention that I’d archived a bunch of chats on WhatsApp because I thought archiving meant deleting old messages to save memory and assumed that if a new message came in I’d get a notification and see it!

NOPE! That’s not what happens

And I went into my archived chats and I had a message from my (cishet Christian) aunt from early December asking me if I could donate any items for an art exhibition her university is doing for queer history month (which is February)

I did not see this message.

So she didn’t get a response.

She then sent me another message worried that she had offended me, apologising, and saying that she wants to be a good supportive aunt and asking if there’s anyway she can do that.

I did not see this message.

So she didn’t get a response.

She then sent me another message saying she was upset she didn’t get to see me round Christmas and hopes I’m well. (She visited the family but I had to work that day)

Again. Did not see it

Did not respond

…

I’m so devastated! I want to help her with this queer art exhibition but it’s probably too late now. And this poor woman was trying to reach out to me in a loving manner, accepting me as a queer trans person (the whole family is very religious so it was a little bit rocky to begin with but this particular aunt has always been lovely) and from her point of view I just ignored her! For over a month! Just said nothing. And she was worrying that she’d offended me by asking to be involved in art!! I love art! I always wanna be involved in art!

Ive just sent her a bunch of messages apologising and suggesting things I can donate if it’s not too late but she hasn’t responded yet (she’s probably asleep cos it’s quite late) and I’m stressing cos I’ve probably ruined her chance to be involved in this exhibition because I’m a fool who doesn’t know how WhatsApp works 😭

I need to sleep but I’m so upset about this situation I can’t. I just want her to message me back like:

“oh don’t worry! It’s not too late! I can create a work of art in 3 days and the exhibition still has lots of space and is taking pieces literally the day before it opens! It’s all good!”

*Edit*

Update!

Oh thank funk.

[buyingaradspaceship]

dude if my neck keeps up like this I’ll fucking decapitate myself. not a fan of this pain tbh !

[californiaquail]

i've been having really bad thoracic back pain recently worse than it's ever been in my life and i'm not sure these titties are the only cause but they definitely have something to do with it. 👎🏻

[king-spite]

.