#i need to vomit them somewhere
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Matthew and Hanbin together are so funny cuz it's like getting a little window into a weird parallel universe were "innocent schoolboy nextdoor that you wanna take home to your parents" era one direction and "beloved of drag queens serving cvnt bratz doll" era little mix somehow manage to coexist
#does this make any sense???#im sorry 😭#its late#im caffeinated#i have thoughts#i need to vomit them somewhere#one direction#little mix#seok matthew#sung hanbin#shanbin#boys planet#bp999#cerys rambles
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lots of speculation over how round 7 between luka and till will turn out! and its had me thinking about the presence of recurring motifs and how the main ensemble are foils of each other.
i know that many people like to joke about how sua and ivan are genderbends of each other/basically siblings... but in my honest opinion, i think the parallels between the two (similar hair styles and having the more subdued personality of the pairing) are to throw us off about what we know about hyuna and luka lol.
sua and ivan's similarities are to emphasize their situational differences, highlighted by the comic where ivan expressed envy over sua not being in an unrequited love situation (yeah i know that's literally what the definition of a literary foil is, but hear me out LOL). so in that sense i feel that they're not really as similar as it seems?
i personally think that sua has more similarities to luka than she is with ivan, excluding her relationship with mizi. both in terms of their upbringing as being treated like dolls and how their resting face is kind of empty when they're not with mizi/hyuna respectively lol. plus their listless acceptance of the lethal circumstances they exist in
tbh even the childhood dynamic between mizisua and hyuluka (before the hyunwoo thing...of course...) is pretty similar, with mizi/hyuna dragging sua/luka around
i think by emphasizing the similarity between luka and sua, it reframes the events that happened in round 5. while luka probably was purposefully exploiting mizi's grief, it does come to question how much of the cutting shots between the two was mizi seeing sua in luka.
so how does this relate to round 7 between till and luka? there's a lot of speculation that luka will demolish till by pulling the same schtick he did with mizi -- and conversely there's a lot of speculation that vivinos and qmeng will subvert expectations by having till somehow overcome his depression by becoming numb to luka's tricks.
here's a third idea i haven't seen being brought up: luka seeing hyuna in till. i propose this idea because i think we can make some comparisons between till and hyuna. both of them are the most rebellious of the ensemble, both had a tendency to roughhouse as children, and both's choice of music genre is very high-powered with a heavy emphasis on the guitar (i want to say they both have that rock and roll vibe but unfortunately music isn't my forte and i don't want the genreheads to get on my ass LOL).
and now suddenly it feels like the random tidbits we get about luka's interactions with till feels like they're hinting towards something:
#beans of consciousness#alien stage#I DON'T KNOW WHERE I'M GOING WITH THIS.#I JUST HAD IDEAS AND NEEDED TO VOMIT THEM OUT SOMEWHERE.#i'm not a lit major and although i did fine in literary analysis back in school. its not rly my forte lol#so i could just be droppin mad bullshit#oh yeah another thing. the anniversary album. sua and luka covered each others songs
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i hope this is the last thing i see before i die
#i need to find somewhere to rewatch this so i can just stare at them for 90 minutes#MARRIED#SO FUCKING GOD DAMN MARRIED#what if i vomited and then passed out#i’m shooting myself into the sun bye#mikel arteta#granit xhaka#arsenal
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Reporting three days into my Slugterra marathon to which I can't escape from.
It's funny how I Can't be able to see any pair of characters in this series and ship them, the series itself isn't romance-centered and there's enough Lore and action scenes that take My attention.
I thought maybe I could ship Blakk and one of his assistants like El Diablos Nacho or that one red haired guy that appears every now and then, maybe even with Will Shane. I also tried getting the ship vision for other characters but I can't get it, Even some that would attract me like Diablos Nacho x Brimstone, Eli Shane x Twist still need time to boil in my brain.
So in shipper desperation I searched and searched for any pair that would look cute kissing.
Anyways, I found these sillies.
#I could rant about so many thoughts I've had about this series and I just go and vent about the little shipping potential in my eyes#These cute sillies are in the Slugball episode#shipping#slugterra#They're so silly fr#they should cuddle#and smooch#Loved them in their episode#slugball#slugterra ships#Amyways idk I needed to vomit thoughts somewhere and I have been watching Slugterra non-stop for at least three days now and it came outofno#Check the episode for these sillies they have so much crack and fluff potential look at em
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I know it happens often to see writers during a long fic to complain at some point about the first chapters because they got better in the meantime and they look bad to them now.
But this is the first time where I saw this happened when the writing actually got worse
#Like this fic is enraging me#Because it started okay#Simple writing that generally worked despite some awkward moments from time#And evolved into this word vomit where everything is just stated (litterally zero show and all tell) multiple times!#Like it builds zero emotions it just tells me#Conversations made less and les sense going on#I saw zero bonding between the main characters despite being together basically in every scene#It drives me insane#This person believes they got better just because they write longer chapter and longer paragraph#But they tell me litterally nothing#Or so little in proportion to the amount of words#This isn't to bashing on the writer of course#Which is why I am consciously saying nothing about the actual content of the story here#But Jesus christ#Not only i feel like the whole plot that I had interest in was ruined#But also all the potential of the writer themselves#I saw at first someone who just needed to learn some more but was doing generally fine#And instead of improvement i am seeing them getting worse and worse#If they truly believe this is better then they're beyond salvation#I am so sad for all that wasted potential#Rant#Sort of#Ignore me i just needed to express these thoughts and feelings somewhere#I don't want to upset anyone#Maybe I should just delete this post
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i wrote some today and then my friend strangled me about it (want more) so im writing more ig
#IGNORE ME#I SUPPOSE I"LL RIDE SAUCE WHILE ITS SAUCIN??#admittedly no clue what tf the point of this is yet tho+no ending in mind+if i do what i thought about its going to be. too complicated for#my skill level at the end of the day =v=;;#like the minute i thought oh and then the scenarios- i was done for#so maybe i'll fly this kite and then when im done word vomiting i'll backpedal and shave it back to the initial thought#which woulda been like 2 chapter max and just mostly thinking thoughts#its just. that these bitches never stop at thinking thoughts they go insane and bash their head into the wall till the wall gives#like the stubborn goons that they are#my bad. sorry i won't have ideas next time you (kimcom) clearly cannot be trusted with them /lh#i needed to spit this somewhere pls ignore it goodbye
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feeling very passionate about monster high designs bc Frankie going this long without a mullet feels criminal
#goffic rambling#im drawing them now#monster high#frankie stein#you know they would#like come on#im also way too into fashion#so i need to vomit these ideas out#somewhere
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i am okay tho i just have momeys sometimrs . please do not ever worry abt me guys
#i rly rly rly appreciate any asks u guys send me truly i usually hold onto then bc i dont know how to respond and rheyre good to see#sometimes#but im not in any danger i rly am. safe. i have a lot of things keeping me from doing That so. i am safe. dw.#i just get sad a lot. and its my fault i need 2 judt stop it and suck it uo and Work on it all but its so. insurmountable. and it judt#doesnt get easier yk. it never does. whatsver.#but. anyways i am safe i am okif it got to the point i was like. fearful for my life thatd either be The delusion (which is actually good#for me i cant explain it but its good for me) or i coulf talk to my family abt it and theyd help#i just cant talk to them abt This. stuff. the like. the being broken stuff and just not being right#i cant talk to any of them abt that. but if i said hey im genuinely faarful i miggjt do something they would um. help. so its okay#idk. i hope the posts dont seem like i make them for pity i rly dont this blog is just my stream of consciousness#ik i just shouldnt post them and i should judtkeeo a diary but i dont um. how to explain thid#even if nobody sees it it feels better to make a tumblr post bc then it feels like. a performance i guess. its not its real but its like#if i put it somewhere other ppl can see it then that means i exist. thats not quite right but i dont know how to articulate like#i dont nexessarily want ppl to see them i find it embarassing i guess. but it feels dishonest to not post them#since i post everything else. bc i like being open online it makes me think im real. does that make sense#and there are timestamps so i know when things happen. thsts modtly how i remember things#is looking at my blog and checking dates and timestamps. and for older stuff i have to check my dms with ykw. which. is not good for.me at#all. but ihave no other way to remember dayes#i dont know. im rly sry i hate podting vents but i dont like deleting posts eithrr so j dont know oike. idk.#just idk know they arent like. They are serious they are how i feel and i usually make them ehen im in distress#but its not dangerous distress i judt get hopeless. yk? i dont wanr anybody to worry abt me ever im not supposed to be a burden#i dont knoe. i havent articulated anything well. basicallt i dont do rhem for attention i dont do them for like. guilttripping or pity#i dont rly do them for any reason other than irs pure word vomit. i suppose. and tumblr is my wordvomit website. i judt get on here and yap#and it makes me feel so much worse but i get better eventually so its fine.
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THEM!!
♡
#i literally can’t stop thinking about them#sengen my loves#dr stone fanart#dr stone#senku ishigami#gen asagiri#sengen#ALSO SENKU’S HAIR LIKE THIS IS SO <33#as a lil note for everyone too!!: i hc senku to be aroace (like pretty much everyone does)#but as someone who’s aroace myself i NEED yall to learn that u can be in a relationship or in love with someone and still be aroace!#it’s a spectrum :)#so to be specific i hc him to be demiromantic#like myself bc we don’t really have any rep and i relate to senku so fucking much#and he’s just#so ME sometimes#so yea! that’s why this whole rant is here now#sorry for all the word vomit#this is not in relation to the post specifically or anything - just that i wanted somewhere to put my thoughts on the subject
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𝐃𝐚𝐝𝐬, 𝐃𝐚𝐝𝐬, 𝐃𝐚𝐝𝐬 ✧ Feat. JJK MEN
𝐒𝐲𝐧𝐨𝐩𝐬𝐢𝐬 ── Jjk Men in their -real- Daddy era. (Am I secretly having a baby fever LMAOO)
𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐬 ── fluffy stuff, pure wholesomeness and affectionate dads.
𝐃𝐚𝐝𝐝𝐲 ���𝐨𝐣𝐢
It's safe to say that sometimes you're raising two babies - only one of them is a big buff pouty one.
Daddy Toji sneaks to the kitchen in the middle of the night, leaving you both sleeping in your shared bedroom and then slowly closes the door. He promised himself he'd only take one *unnoticeable* spoon of your newborn's baby formula but ends up stuffing his face with the forbidden powder in the heat of the moment. He tries his best to hide his tracks by shoving the tin somewhere far in the cupboard.
He *oddly* always makes sure to be the one preparing his baby's bottle the next day - 'Oh darling, don'tcha move a muscle...I'll be right back with our baby's breakfast!'
You smile and raise a brow, already suspecting something. Daddy Toji is not much of a morning person. much less when it comes to baby chores...
𝐃𝐚𝐝𝐝𝐲 𝐒𝐚𝐭𝐨𝐫𝐮
Gojo is always there whenever you change your baby's diaper. He keeps laughing and giggling like a 6 year old, curiously learning from his baby momma how to take care of his little child. His sky blue eyes are staring at your skilled hands, handling your precious little one with infinte care. He keeps smiling in awe, chuckling every time your baby farts and making the funniest faces just to make them giggle.
He takes a million pictures of his baby every day; we're talking his whole camera roll is just his baby's face, cutesy hands, tiny feet, smiling, eating, sleeping on daddy's chest, drooling on his shoulder...the list never ends.
His baby looks so smol when he holds it in his huge hands. He has to bend all the way down just so he could pick them up cause obviously my dude is the tallest man ever.
𝐃𝐚𝐝𝐝𝐲 𝐍𝐚𝐧𝐚𝐦𝐢
He'd take full care of your newborn just to see you rest and relax. He told you to teach him everything he needs to know so that he'd be perfectly fit for his new -and best ever- occupation; your baby father. He's got however only one pet peeve; getting his little one to burp after feeding them.
The reason? He was doing it once, holding the baby while gently patting its back...until he suddenly felt a warm liquid slithering down his shirt - the expensive one you dearly gifted him on your wedding anniversary- and to his surprise it was none other than his little one's vomit dripping down his shoulder...
Now he makes sure you hold a napkin behind him whenever he does it.
𝐃𝐚𝐝𝐝𝐲 𝐆𝐞𝐭𝐨
He's by far the chillest Daddy EVER. Carries his little one whenever he goes. Gets super jealous when your baby starts calling for you, or wants you to hold them instead of him. He's determined to make them say 'daddy' first, but deep down knows it'd melt his heart when he sees the little version of him utter mommy's name for the first time.
Staying awake at night putting his baby to sleep just so you can get your full nightly rest is something he'd never miss out on. He hates seeing you tired or sleepy and puts both of your needs before anything else.
Daddy Geto is always calm and smiley, no matter how much mess his baby makes or how long it'd take for him to clean it up - sometimes makes you seriously wonder how he manages to be so damn chill all the time.
𝐃𝐚𝐝𝐝𝐲 𝐒𝐮𝐤𝐮𝐧𝐚
For a husband twice your size with four arms and eyes he sure should take most care of your little offspring - He does tbf - His baby is always laying somewhere on his body or at least near him; sleeping against his chest, nibbling on his thumb, drooling on the side of his shoulder or sitting on his huge lap.
He's got a 6th sense whenever it comes to his baby being hungry, thirsty, sleepy or needing anything at all. Instantly knows the reason why his little one is crying and most of the time is very quick to make them happy again.
Absolutely hates poopie smell and calls them a brat whenever he senses their diaper getting heavier. 'Aggh you little runt!' You can't help laughing at him getting overwhelmed with such a tiny thing and start teasing him over it.
𝐃𝐚𝐝𝐝𝐲 𝐘𝐮𝐮𝐭𝐚
There's nothing that Yuuta loves more than children. He has always wanted to have kids and couldn't wait to create his very first and own one with you. He's in LOVE with seeing you taking care of them; almost admiring every move and every word you say. He smiles like an idiot whenever he sees you holding your baby, breastfeeding them, playing with them or even laying next to them.
His favorite game is to hide somewhere in the house and let his little one look for him. He does it so suddenly and quickly, leaving them puzzled with big round eyes - comes out of his hideaway when they start sobbing and laughs at their little red nose and pouty cheeks.
'Aww why is my little cupcake cryiiing?...Daddy's right here!'
#jjk x reader#jjk x you#jjk imagines#jjk headcanons#jujutsu kaisen x reader#jujutsu kaisen smut#toji x reader#toji x you#jjk smut#toji imagine#jjk toji#toji smut#toji fushiguro#fushiguro toji#jujutsu kaisen#nanami headcanons#nanami kento x reader#nanami x reader#nanami kento#gojou satoru x reader#gojo x reader#gojou satoru x you#gojo satoru#gojo imagine#gojo satoru smut#suguru geto#geto suguru smut#geto suguru x reader#geto x reader#geto suguru
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So surprise suprise another RSD/I don’t know what people want from me rant. I know I always seems to be complaining about my RSD but a series of things happened this past week that just really set it off, like the worst it’s been, and I just, I just need to get this out, I need write it down even if it makes no sense or it’s just going to fester and make me even sadder
So Wednesday “friend” at work J1 was (I will say it was jokingly) like oh don’t talk to J2, and when I ask why, he was like ‘I’m trying to plan a dinner for C’s birthday with J2, D and myself, like we did for j2’s birthday (which didn’t know about that) and she’s being difficult’…. A dinner I wasn’t invited to btw lol, and when I pointed oh this is like the ice cream incident (where they went to the gelato place literally doors down from work one day on a day I wasn’t working, despite me saying hey I wanna go we should go one day), he laughed Because he thought I was joking and then wondered why I was in a mood the rest of the day
And like every week, well 98% of every time we work a Saturday together I’m getting two of those 4 a juice from our favourite place that I walk to and then back to work because I finish before them, and the other 2 when I grab lunch I’ll get them chips or share mine or my nuggets but I can’t get a dinner invite? It just hurts alittle
Like i understand they can do things as their own little group but like don’t complain to me about someone being difficult about plans and then laugh when i point out ‘oh hey another thing you guys are doing that I’m not invited to’ when we’re supposed to be friends but your constantly doing things and not inviting me.
And Saturday/Sunday another “friend” from work who start of the year made all these promises of what we were going to do this year (none of which we’ve done, we’ve hung out 2times that wasn’t a concert and one was to get an outfit for a concert and the other to see a concert movie), made the joke ‘oh your going somewhere without me” when I said i was going to something Saturday night the very rare time I have had plans, despite her originally being INVITED when the plans were made (she didn’t actually acknowledge the offer at the time)…. Went to the beach and didn’t invite me like people wonder why they don’t here from me much or make the “joke” I don’t leave my house
Oh and The kicker to Saturday night?? she already had plans!? But complained because I didn’t invite her to mine which again she was, and then the next day goes to the beach and not a word 😶. But if it’s a concert she wants to go to? Oh I’m the first person she messages, cause I get the tickets and don’t ask for the money straight away because I’m an idiot and talking money makes me uncomfortable.
And to round it all off, My own mother, who I’ve barely had any contact with since like Feb? Last year (Due to various reasons growing up but especially due to how I found out about a death in the family) is in Fiji. I can barely get a text for Christmas/my birthday, haven’t gotten a present in years But she can put money in to get my brother a dog for his birthday and now apparently an overseas holiday, And not to forget She owes me a couple thousand she ‘borrowed’. How do I find out she in Fiji? A phone call? A voice mail?, hell a text? Nope I find out from her posting on facebook
I’m just sick of being too much for people, too loud, too focused on the “wrong things”, I message too much, I’m too weird, but at the same time I’m too quiet, I don’t message enough, I don’t speak up enough, I’m not enough to actually spend time with and go do things with
Like It makes me want pull back from my online communities, I mean shit I’ve haven’t been active in the discord groups in I’m for months (and the thought of trying to literally scares me), and pull away from my online friends because like if people in my real, day to day life don’t want to do things with me or interact with me, why would my online friends? Which I know isn’t true I know it but that thought is hella loud
#oh look#it’s carlee complaining about RSD… again#rant#word vomit#I just need to get these thoughts out#I need to put them somewhere cause my brain hurts#I just want to be enough for people#rsd things#rejection sensitivity
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May I request a NSFW alphabet for our deranged, red ass, momo-eyed princess Mr Scarletta from Homicipher👉👈˃ᴗ˂
MR. SCARLETELLA NSFW ALPHABET
a Mr. Scarletella nsfw alphabet. {an : omg.. why ofc.. hes sooo hot i love him. also funny words >< we need more porn of this man in general, also im working on a hc fic for him~~~~ if nobody will write for him then i will!!! ^•^}
warnings! : stalking, non-conish..? more like dub-con, rough sex, cunnilingus, blowjobs, yandere, blood kink, knife play, hes a kinky mf, abuse play, asphyxiation, afab and amab genitalia described, sadism kink, red. everywhere. miss-use of an umbrella.... looks around nervously
A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)
it really depends on his mood. USUALLY he is somewhat decent at it. he doesnt really understand the human need for aftercare, so most he will do is probably clean you and cuddle you on certain occasions.
B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)
for him, he likes his hands. and his height, but mainly his hands. {plus you complimented them once, so it made him like them more.}
on YOU, other than your face, definitely your waist and neck. he likes how fragile you are. also he likes YOUR height. small.
C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)
due to his sheer size, he cums a lot. not TOO much, and not as much as the others, but enough to fill you to the brim.
he almost always cums inside, unless its a blowjob. if it is, he likes to pull out and cum on your face or chest. make sure to have your tongue out though.
D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)
he really wants to fuck you unconscious. though not really a secret, he makes it obvious.
E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)
you would be his first time, being a ghost and all. but hes a very fast learner so expect him to be a beast in bed {or wherever} once he finds those spots and what turns you on.
F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)
any position that he can choke you in. or shove his fingers in your mouth. he would take another position if you offered though. he just wants you.
G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)
even outside of sex, he isn't humorous. hes always serious with that stare that he does {soo sexy.. (´﹃`)}
H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)
not a lot, but its there. nice red happy trail and hair where it would be normally.
I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)
well he's always romantic. in his own... creepy way. but he does love you. too much. in an obsessive, stalker way. so yes, he is.
J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)
he doesn't, nor does he feel the need to, but if he finds YOU touching yourself.. thats a special occasion, he WILL whip it out and start stroking himself then. and only then.
K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)
oh dear.. blood kink, abuse kink, impact kink, vouyerism, asphyxiation, degradation, cnc, etc
L = Location (favorite places to do the do)
either his "space" or somewhere random. {he secretly hopes someone will find you}
M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)
you.
N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)
coprophilia, vomit. thats literally it.
O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)
prefers giving. you are his QUEEN. {king if you prefer.} he is a beast with his mouth. he would do anything you ask, much like Mr. Crawling.
he does enjoy receiving though, loves to see you go down on him.
P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)
fast and rough. will only slow down if you BEG him to.
Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)
anything to get you and him off. he does prefer to take his time with you, so usually he will just teleport you somewhere.
R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)
obviously. i mean its Mr. Scarletella that we are talking about. {drools...} he would do anything risky.
S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)
doesnt have stamina, could go for hours honestly. he can cum pretty fast if he wants to, but either way he just wants YOU.
T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)
no he doesnt own any. {unless you count his umbrella... well get to that later..}
U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)
oh all the time. constantly teasing you and trying to get you horny. if you tease him back then its OVER for you.. good luck walking ><
V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)
not loud at all, his breath may hitch and he might groan softly every now and then, but he wants to listen to your noises more than anything.
W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)
he will use his umbrella handle as a "dildo" of sorts. wants to watch you attempt to put it in. the end is curved, so its fun to watch you struggle. he will force it if he has to.
X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)
oo,, big boy. hes over 8 feet tall, so its a given. his shaft is around 8-9 inches maybe, a darker tip and maybe 3 inches wide.
Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)
hes only horny if either you are, or if you do something that turns him on.
Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)
doesnt need sleep, he is a ghost. does enjoy watching you sleep. hes weird, per se. will cuddle up to you and get you as close as possible.
#smut#homicipher#homicipher x reader#mr. scarletella x reader#mr. scarletella#mr. scarletella x y/n#mr. scarletella x you
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On a Wing and a Prayer
Part 3 - The First 24 Hours
This 'short' dribble is getting out of control. Also reader is a medic now... I have a thing for medical dramas.. CW: PTSD, mental health, panic attacks, little bit of comfort.
Previous parts - masterlist - next
You don’t want to stay in the med-bay. You want to get out of the sterile room to somewhere you feel comfortable. Which is hard to find while you’re still stuck on a base. You go to your room trying to ignore and avoid as many people as you can.
You catch people whispering out the corner of your eyes, there’s probably not been anything this interesting happening in months. It’s not everyday special forces turn on one of their own, it’s not everyday they torture one of their own.
You make it back to your room. It’s just the way you left it. Now it feels empty.
There would be times when you would come back from a long day of training to find Simon laid on your bed with a cigarette between his lips, or Johnny sitting crossed legged with a book ready to talk your ear off about his day.
That’s never going to happen again, you never want them in your space again. When you make it over to the bed you see a letter with your name on it. You recognise the handwriting it’s John’s. You don’t want to open it, your eyes go to the trash bin in the corner of your room. That's the only place it belongs.
Your curiosity gets the better of you though.
You sit down picking it up, your hands shaking, you’re holding your breath as you open it. You don’t even make it past the first line of the word vomit apology before you don’t want to read it any more. There is no use in them trying to reconcile with you. You fold it closed. Simon’s lighter is still there on the crate you turned into a bedside table. You pick it up, it makes you mad.
You hate them, you hate what they put you through. You thought they loved you. You thought they would be on your side believing everything you said. Instead they hurt you, over and over for days. You found out from Kyle it had been 4 days. It felt longer.
You bring the lighter up to the letter and set it on fire. You hold it in your hand watching as the flames disintegrate it into nothing. You drop it on the floor when it's about to reach your fingers and stamp it out. The knock at your door makes you jump. Your heart is pounding in your chest.
“It’s me.” Kyle calls. You walk over opening it. He smiles at you but you don’t smile back.
“He’s awake. He’s asking for you.” Kyle says. You let out a sigh of relief. He made it, thank god he made it. You follow Kyle in silence back to the med-bay. You walk past the room you slept in last night. Well slept wasn’t really the right word. Everytime you close your eyes, you're back in that room, with the snakes and the water. Two hours you think you go in total, spent the rest of the night having panic attacks until a nurse found you sobbing in a corner.
The doctor wants you to speak to a psychiatrist. ‘Yeah? So I can be discharged? I want to work.’ That was met with sighs and a prescription for sleeping pills. Kyle stops just outside Johnny’s room. He turns to you and sighs.
“John and Simon are already here.” He says, it makes your stomach twist. You haven’t seen them since you left the room. You don’t want to see them, but you want to see Johnny.
“It’s okay.” You lie. Kyle sighs again, you can tell by the expression on his face he’s sorry.
“They don’t want to tell Johnny about what happened. They’re worried it will upset him. He’s only just woke up, the doctors want to give him a few days. Make sure he’s stable.”
“Is that the doctor's decision on John’s?” You snap. You’re mad, you don’t want to lie to Johnny. Kyle doesn’t answer, instead he presses his lips together running his hand over his head. You sigh looking into the room, you can see John and Simon stood by the bed blocking your view of Johnny.
It doesn’t matter who said it, they're right. Johnny needs rest, he needs to recover, he’s been in a coma for almost a week any stress could be dangerous.
“I won’t say anything.” You say letting out a breath. Kyle smiles and reaches forward to grab your hand. You move it away so he can’t crossing your arms instead. You have to calm down or it’s going to be harder than it already is.
Kyle walks in the room and you follow after. You try not to look at them but you can’t help it. Luckily Johnny pulls your attention away.
“Where have you been hiding lass? I thought you'd never leave my side!” He calls as you make it round to the other side of the bed and hug him. He groans in pain as he leans forward. You hope he can’t feel how hard your heart is beating.
“We were worried, for a while it looked like you weren't going to make it.” Kyle says as you break away from the hug.
“Pff, not when I have the best medic in the world looking after me.” He says winking at you and grabbing your hand. You squeeze it tight and force a smile at him. It feels unnatural, it feels wrong, everything about this feels wrong.
“What happened?” He asks suddenly, his eyes creasing together, his face going dark. You’re holding your breath, it feels like everyone in the room is holding their breath. He holds your hand up. You still have the hospital tag on. Shit. Panic rises in you. You don’t know what to do. You open your mouth to speak but words don’t come out.
“She hit her head.” Kyle says. You let out a sigh of relief as his hand finds the small of your back.
“They wanted to keep me in for observation.” You follow up hoping he can’t hear the shaking in your voice. You look up at John and Simon, the colour drained from their faces. Simon clears his throat and Johnny turns to look at him. It gives you a second to squeeze your eyes shut and wish you were anywhere else.
“You been pushing her too hard again?” Johnny asks Simon tutting.
“Only what she can handle.” Simon says, it sounds cold in your ears. You feel sick bile rises in your stomach. You need to leave, your hand is sweaty, you pull it away from Johnny. You’re glad Kyle’s hand is on your back because without it you think you might pass out.
“I have to go. Got this new rota that's kicking my ass.” You say trying to keep your voice level. It sounds so unnatural. You swallow trying to get the lump forming in your throat to go away but it wont. “I’ll come see you later. I promise.” You back up from the bed as Johnny looks confused.
You can’t be here. You almost want to sprint out the room but you keep your calm walking out normally. When you leave and close the door behind you, that's when you run.
______
You’re standing outside the washroom with a towel and a toothbrush in your hand. You want to take a shower scrub the layer of grease that's formed on your skin. You tried, you tried to take a shower in the hospital, the water brings flashbacks. Great, now you’re afraid of water.
You have to get it together, if you can’t you’ll be sent home on leave, or worse discharged. You want to work, you enjoy work. Maybe not the people you work with but you’ve already thought about a transfer. You doubt John will have any issues with that, and if he does well there are always people above him.
“Hey.” Kyle calls making you jump. He frowns coming towards you. “Didn’t see you at dinner, is everything okay?” It looks like he already regrets that question, no nothing is okay. Everything sucks and all you want to do is take a shower.
“I want a shower.” You say looking back at the door.
“Is someone in there? I can kick them out.” he offers, you sigh, shaking your head. He seems to get it and you hear him sigh. He steps up next to you putting his hand on your back.
“I can help,” he says. You shake your head forcing yourself to be strong as your lip quivers. You have to try and do this alone. Your knuckles turn white as you grip your toothbrush as hard as you can.
“I’ll watch the door, make sure no one comes in.” He says rubbing your back. You smile at him and nod, stepping into the room before you change your mind completely.
The place smells damp as the automatic lights flicker on. It’s only been you and the rest of 141 using this space so their stuff is everywhere. You start to realise things about the room you didn’t even see before. It’s windowless, there’s a loud hum of vents. The place smells of aftershave and soap.
You walk over to one of the showers, hanging your towel over the half wall. You’re stripping your clothes before you can stop yourself. This feels like a routine, showering in the freezing base showers only this time the thought of turning the showers on makes you feel sick.
You keep telling yourself you can do this, repeating the mantra in your head if only to keep your mind occupied. You’ve been taught how to deal with PTSD and triggers, what's the best way to help, or stave them away. You don’t have PTSD, you remind yourself. You’re just going through a rough patch.
As soon as you can get away from 141 and have a good night's sleep you’ll feel better. And now Johnny’s awake, that's one less thing to worry about. You reach over and twist the hot tap on. The water hits your arm and you pull it back like you’ve just been burned.
You can do this. It’s just a shower. Kyle’s watching the door. No one can hurt you.
You suck in a deep breath and stick your leg in, the water is surprisingly hot for once. That’s good, it will make things easier. One step at a time. Your hand and arm go in next, your breathing picks up, goosebumps rise on the parts of your body still exposed to the air. Now you’re shaking.
You let out a long breath forcing yourself to move into the water. You turn letting it run down your back in an attempt to get the shaking to stop. It doesn’t work. Now you’re frozen you can’t move. You try to focus on getting your breathing to steady but it’s not working. You have nothing to distract yourself with.
You force your eyes closed, that just makes things worse. Fear rises in you, you don’t know why but your head tips back. As soon as the water hits your face it’s like you don’t know where you are anymore. You’re not in the showers, you're back in the room. The water drowns out any sound in your ears. You don’t know what’s happening anymore.
The next thing you know you’re on the floor, your head throbs. There’s commotion, a noise you don’t recognise and footsteps. You open your eyes with a sob as tears escape. You turn, you must have slipped, Kyle is turning the shower off. He picks up your towel and comes over to you, bending down and wrapping it around you. He doesn’t say anything, just kneels down on the wet floor pulling you into his arms.
You sob in his arms as he holds you tight. You get it all out, all the tears you’ve been avoiding over the last 24 hours. Maybe this is what you needed: a good cry.
Kyle doesn’t let you go. Eventually he starts rocking you, stroking your hair, kissing the top of your head. He tells you everything will be okay. You want to believe him, you so badly want to leave this room and everything will be magically better.
It won’t be though, and it won’t be for a very long time.
As you calm down and your body stops shaking, anger burns in you. This should never have happened to you. Especially not by the people you love. You hate them, you never want to see them again. Kyle notices your change in body language and silently helps you to your feet.
He walks you across to your room, closing the door behind him.
“Want me to stay?” he asks as he helps you over to your bed. You nod looking up at him, he strokes your cheek smiling. “I’ll be back in a second.” He says going to leave the room.
You don’t want to be alone, not right now. Maybe with Kyle here you can get some sleep. Or maybe it will be worse, right now you’ll try anything. You look over at Simon's lighter still sitting on the crate. You pick it up, turning it over in your hand before dropping it in the trash.
You never want to see them again.
next
I could have kept going. I don't know when to stop... This is what happens when my main fic is on hold. I need a million projects or I get bored XD Banners by firefly-graphics
#call of duty#fanfic#simon ghost riley#john soap mactavish#john price#kyle gaz garrick#captain john price#taskforce 141#poly 141#poly 141 x reader#tf 141 x reader
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Anyway, I bring this back with ART! Technically sketches but still. A full body Selina and a headshot of tiny Damian while he's growing his hair out from the assassin-in-training safety cut. (Long hair + untrained hands with sharp swords and other weapons do not mix well lol)
(Not shown is the many necklaces & other bands of jewelry Selina constantly has lol)
Also can't remember who reblogged with the idea, but you are so right that Gothamites have a lot of skirt-esque clothing for when not actively working. (Goons and Rogues and the GCPD for example need the pants for the extra armor but on days off or when they're not working it's skirt time!)
Bet Galas are the same with dresses (have I mentioned those yet?). Doesn't matter if you're a guy a gal or something else, dresses are usually the norm, which is probably very confusing for any Outsiders joining in the galas lol.
Y'know now that I'm thinking about this once more. So the Gothamites do usually have organs similar to sharks with sensing electromagnetic forces and blood and changes in water pressure, all that. But I wonder if some might also have a basic echolocation of sorts too.
And we've talked about clothing and jewelry and such. But you know what else would be effected? Food.
Fish and dishes on the rawer side. Lots of things seasoned with what should be poison, and is to anyone else. But the Gothamites themselves are twice as poisonous and they think it's great. Some only do a sprinkling while others chose to use it like salt- everything is poisonous.
I bet there's even food trucks and smaller shops that pop up throughout the year that you can't find anywhere else. Fried pufferfish sticks- poison still included! Cuttlefish bagels! Stuffed potatoes & jellyfish! Nudibranch-themed waffles! Dumplings that look like eldritch seals! Anemone stews! Lemonade with sea krait venom! Vegetarian kelp cookies! Like their food has got to have shifted as their appetites have. (Batman & co have also definitely brought food/lunches to the bases and triple labeled their food to Not Eat. Though I wonder if anyone has done so anyway and had the worst time in the emergency room)
pspspsps @f4nd0m-fun I've brought Art :>
Mermay Special Prompt 3
“Are you kidding? No one goes to Gotham, that place is like,” Aquaman made a motion with his hand, a not-quite grimace on his face. “Like things should not be living in the water, like it should be impossible, and things should be dead, but they aren’t and it’s like, like the equivalent of an undead apocalypse over there!”
Bruce rolled his eyes behind his cowl, taking a sip of his coffee as the others continued drinking. Socialize, they said, it’ll be fine they said. Well excuse him, but the waters weren’t that bad. Sure there were always dumped bodies, and chemicals from the rogue attacks, but it was far worse at one point.
One thing he’ll always be relieved for is how the… curse (thank you broken statuette back in the beginning of his vigilante career that fused with the other many curses of Gotham) made the people of Gotham actually care about the waters around them.
Though also, he couldn’t help but thank anything that might be listening for the fact that the curse only interacted with Gotham waters, because losing legs with any risk of a drop of water would be downright annoying.
“No dude, you don’t understand, no one goes there for a reason! That shit is horrific- someone saw a big thing with bits of rebar stabbed straight through it and still chased after a big alligator-thing!” Oh. Oh that had been him. Oops. Hopefully his kids didn’t find out about this, but they were probably already on the cameras. Dammnit.
#*wheeze* h20 au#mer au#long post#cryptid batfam#Don't worry about word vomit#Though I will say the Keep Reading is a blessing at times lol#I need Bruce to show the League Helena's baby pictures before the reveal#Just because I want them to at first be like 'okay he has a baby'#And then get hit with SURPRISE HE HAS OVER A DOZEN#Oh my god what if we added Jarro#Would- would he be in mer form more often because he would be able to interact more in a going out and in public sense#then again I don't think Gotham would be surprised about Bruce & his wives adopting baby alien starfish child#Oh my god I bet Gotham's fauna & flora must be WILD even outside the sea#Like u got poison ivy and all these chemicals around effecting everything#It's like a specialized predator and prey environment you can't find anywhere else#Pfft- that's why the bats are always prepared- they're specialized predators built for Gotham but drop them somewhere else#& they'll wreck the local rogue & goon population#Let's see if Tumblr deletes some tags again#I bet instead of just spice levels restaurants will have poison-levels for the locals too#Anyone from out of town doesn't no shit about it and doesn't get the option lol#Not that it stops poisonings and disappearances from happening it IS Gotham after all lmao#Oh my god Bruce deserves to have all his kids in this AU lmao#Just for the big line of holding hands like otters#body horror?
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Have you ever thought about the idea of a Clueless ace reader x ace alastor trying to figure out what all the fuss is about? Couple different ways it could go obviously but I feel like it would be a perfect comedy smut
Thank you for this meal. Okay I know this is LOOSELY based on your prompt, please forgive me. Can I add in that they be a little tipsy?
After a few drinks, you and Alastor do your usual teasing and mimicking of the others dramatic displays of physical affection. But, unusually, Alastor seems to be really invested in the joke tonight…
Warnings/promises: light smut (fingering), wrong kind of haha, sconces, bad Angel accent, Under 1500 words
maybe the tag list? Works list: @ xx-all-purpose-nerd-xx
Alastor list: @celestial-vomit , @amurtan
.
Fuck Joke Around and Find Out
The evening started with drinks among the group gathered at the bar. Everyone talking, sipping, leaning into each other to be heard better. Vaggie’s fingers playing with Charlie’s, Angel inching closer and closer to Husk until he was quite literally on top of him, to Husk’s obvious embarrassment. At some point, Angel took Husker’s hand, the two slinking down the hallway. Soon after, Vaggie not-so-discreetly followed a bouncing Charlie to their top floor home.
After realizing the couples snuck off, you turned to Alastor and asked, already smiling, “Oh I guess it’s our turn?”
Your giggling slipped into mutual cackles, his brows rose and he asked, “Your room or mine?”
You threw your leg over Alastor’s lap and straddled him, mustering your best Angel Dust accent, “Pssst rooms are for squares, baby.”
Normally, especially when having a little to drink, the physical barrier between each other was thin and easily toppled. An unspoken understanding had formed some time ago, allowing you both to relax a little more than usual when in close proximity. He still attempted his touchy intrusions to fluster and bother people, but he knew that didn’t work quite as effectively on you.
“Squares? Oh, not us.” A smirk, his head somewhat dramatically shaking a reinforced ‘no’, making his bobbed hair sway left and right.
When you start a pitifully-motivated grinding against him, losing balance and tipping backward, Alastor’s large hands come to the dip of your hips and still you. A laughed, accent-less, “Thanks, trying to do it like he did,” fell sloppily from your mouth, your hands going to his shoulders for extra security. Your head bent down, stifling another nervous giggle from spilling out. “I think this is exactly how Angel had Husk pinned. Not a convincin’ portrayal, pookie?” Your accent was shit, but he smiled all the same. His ears were pressed down and to the side, resting a little more against his skull than usual, something that seemed to happen often when he had a couple glasses. It looked more relaxed than his normal way of wearing them, but you never asked him about it.
Alastor’s finger tipped your chin upward, pulling you in for a kiss against his grin. When you huffed, fighting the awkward laugh, he swiped his tongue over your lips and slid into your mouth. A hum, as you relaxed into it. What a long joke this is, you think somewhere a little up and to the left of your liquor softened mind.
When alone together, you’d occasionally play around. Just mimicking what ridiculous things the other sinners had done recently, laughing and moving on to general gossip and conversation. Maybe the alcohol was dragging out the bit.
His hands pulled you forward, your little hip movements actually making contact with his crotch now. You hear yourself moan into his mouth before you even realize you’d made the noise.
Thinking becoming a little fuzzy, you pull back from him, “Oops. Sorry. Got carried away.”
“No need to apologize. What’s a little joking around between pals?”
You nod before a surprised shriek is forced out of you, Alastor pulling your hips down and starting to sincerely grind against you.
“I didn’t expect you to remember all the moves, Alastor.” Your hand came to your mouth trying to still the tremble of your lips as you spoke. Other hand now gripping his shoulder to stay upright. You’d never have played around with any one else but him like this. Too much confusion to deal with after. But, Alastor’s “playing” was so convincing. You weren’t minding it, to your surprise, but you weren’t sure you understood the source material as well he did.
His head fell back with a roar, “Being an infrequent lover doesn’t mean I am a bad one.”
Oh. Was the blush on your face noticeable in the dingy light of the parlor? You had never heard him say that word before. His hips were still moving, but the laughing stopped. It wasn’t unpleasant, in fact you found yourself sinking a little more, letting your weight settle fully. It earned you a sloppy half-smile from him. “That would make them experts, compared to us,” You motioned your head in the general direction of the stairs.
“You think so?”, he leaned up to kiss you, you leaned back a little, causing his lips to miss yours. A quick annoyed glare passed over his face before slipping back into a neutral stare, “Are you in the mood for a good joke tonight, dear? I wouldn’t be opposed to making you”, he grazed his nose against yours, “laugh.”
You let him capture your mouth with his, a surprisingly more intense kiss, before pulling away again when you caught another moan rising up, “I don’t mind a good laugh, now and then.” Did you-you say that or Angel-you?
The sofa cushions were pressing into your back before you could process what had happened. Alastor’s body was resting between your legs, which were spread open around him. His lips didn’t leave yours, one of his hands cradling your neck to trap you between him and his hungry mouth. The other was undoing the button of your pants and sliding under the band of your underwear.
His back was arched, his considerable height forcing him to bend over you if he wanted to continue the kiss, which he apparently did. Now on your back, you wiggled under him, awkward and uncertain what role you played anymore.
When his fingers slipped past your bottom lips and the mound of his hand ground into your clit, you pulled away from him and both hands shot to your mouth. You were aware you were in a public space but you couldn’t see anything past the sofa. Everything beyond him and the tattered chaise lounge was shadowy and lacking contrast. Even then, your heart was pounding.
When did the playing around shift? Was this—- did he think this was funny? His smile was strong against your neck still, but maybe not?
You splayed your fingers out to better hide yourself, embarrassed at how your hips rolled into his palm. Looking past your hands, you could see him staring down at you now, wide shoulders hiding you from the light of the sconces above. He had the same look as always in his eyes, nothing out of place. Cooly, he asked without actually wanting an answer, “Do you think this is what they’re doing now? Or is everyone already…”
A finger slipped down and into you, your legs clenching around his hips. You heard him sigh, before a second finger began to push in. Your hips lifted off the sofa and angled into his hand, welcoming the way he was pressing down and into you.
Oh, yeah, no.
A pent up moan tumbled past your lips when his fingers crooked up and pressed into the soft bundle of nerves just inside your entrance.
“What a curious laugh you have, my dear. Are my jokes that good?” He buried his face into the crook of your neck again when a voice stopped him from leaving the little marks he had been set on.
“I thought jokes were supposed to be funny. When is the funny part going to happen?”
Alastor’s ears were pin-straight into the air, hair stiff and sharp, as his face slowly turned to the side to see Niffty sitting at the bar.
”Oh, was I suppose to leave when everyone else did?” His hand slipped out of you and then in turn, your pants.
“No, Niffty, dear. That’s quite alright.”, Ears faced back and down, eyes half lidded and smile clearly forced, “We were just— playing around.”
“Really? Cuz it kinda looked like you guys were gonna fuck.” She hopped off the bar stool and scurried down the hall, “Please don’t dirty the sofa, sir.” echoing behind her.
You patted his shoulder, lifting yourself up on your elbows, “Can I be Husk next?”
I wrote this while washing dishes— the dishes aren’t very clean but neither am I
༻Masterlist༺
#alastor x reader#hazbin hotel#alastor smut#alastor x reader smut#alastor#hazbin hotel x reader#hazbin alastor#fanfiction#hazbin hotel fanfiction#hazbin hotel smut#alastor x you#hazbin hotel alastor#hazbinhotel#alastor hazbin hotel#x you#reader fic#reader#x reader#reader insert#smut writing#smut fanfiction#fanfic
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Meeting your ex jjk boyfriend again after your breakup
Pairings: Gojo x fem!reader; Toji x fem!reader
Word Count: 3,1 k
Warnings: cheating in gojo's part, overwhelming emotions in every part lol
Well that escalated quickly. If you want a part two with Geto, Sukuna, Chose and/or someone else let me know 🤍
Gojo Satoru
You hate to be here. Just the thought of seeing his face again makes your guts turn. When was the last time you encountered each other?
When he was with her.
“Don’t panic, I’m here with you. Remember?”, Utahime mutters into your ear while walking up those cursed steps towards jujutsu high.
“I thought I’d never have to see that jerk’s face again…”
“Well, not when you’re the second strongest. Don’t let that idiot ruin your mood.”
You sign to yourself, gaze drifting over your beloved students.
When you found out your long-term boyfriend Gojo Satoru cheated on you with none other than Mei Mei, you dropped out of Tokyo Jujutsu High immediately. It was Utahime who took you under her wing and made you the teacher you are today – at Kyoto High.
Those past two years, you really managed to stay away from him. After changing your phone number countless times, after searching day and night for a place to live that he won’t find so easily, you finally lived in peace. Far away from the pain he caused, well distracted from your still messed-up feelings.
But now you’re back. And you will be forced to meet that prick.
“There they come”, Nobara mutters while her gaze drifts over every person that comes into frame.
“Hey, who’s that woman over there?”
“That’s (y/n), a former student here at Jujutsu High. She attended the same class as Gojo-sensei. Right now, she’s working as a teacher at Kyoto High”, Megumi explains briefly.
“Former? Why isn’t she here anymore? I’d love to borrow those boots from here. Damn, that outfit really rocks…”
“There have been some…incidents with Gojo-sensei…”
Nobara’s eyes widen in pure curiosity, her eyes scanning you up and down.
“Her, with that white-haired idiot?��
“What are my lovely students talking about?”
Megumi rolls his eyes out of instinct when the tall man comes to a stand behind them.
“Oh look, the students from Kyoto High arrives with their tea-“
His breath gets stuck in your throat when your eyes make contact with his. How long has it been since he last saw you?
You look…flawless. Your hair a little longer than in his imagination, your body well-built by the countless training hours you might have spent over there at Kyoto High.
But your cold gaze is still the same as on that fateful day that still repeats itself over and over inside his head.
Fuck.
“Look who’s there”, he jeers from afar.
You feel like vomiting all over the floor. Were you really dumb enough to think your feelings just disappeared into thin air? You force your eyes away from him and to stare at his students instead. You just need to get those few days over with. Only those couple hours and you’ll get away with not seeing him for another 2 years.
“Shut up, Gojo”, Utahime warns him next to you.
“It’s nice to see you’re still as weak as before, Utahime! I wonder if you’re still crying all the time-“
"Funny, Gojo. It's nice to see your arrogance is still compensating for your insecurities. Some things never change."
The air around you freezes when those words leave your mouth, everyone around you going silent in an instant. It’s only you and him. Him with that suddenly so hardened expression, you with eyes that spit venom his way.
“Why don’t you save your breath for someone who cares and just leave us alone until the competition starts?”
"Touché. But if you're going to psychoanalyze me, how about we do it somewhere private? We have some catching up to do."
There it is again. That cheeky smile you know painfully well, the way he tilts his head to the side oh so playfully. Your heart wrenches, bleeds out like it did on that day you saw him.
In Mei Mei’s bedroom.
While she was naked.
“I’d rather die, asshole.”
Without gifting him another look you storm away. Towards the main building, as far away as possible without anyone being able to follow you.
Fuck, you swore to yourself you are over this shit. You shouldn’t care about him, shouldn’t even feel bothered by looking at him anymore. Only one glance at him and you’re completely losing it? You thought you were better than this, stronger than you were two years ago. But apparently, nothing changed. You’re still crying over someone who betrayed you in the nastiest way possible.
A gentle grasp on your wrist rips you out of your nightmares and catapults you in an even worse one.
“Let go of me”, you hiss through gritted teeth when his bright blue eyes meet yours.
"I definitely won’t make that mistake again. You can run all you want, but you know we need to talk. You can’t keep avoiding this... or me.”
You yank your wrist away with full force when something inside you snaps.
"Talk? About what, Gojo? How you always think you can just waltz back into my life whenever it suits you? I’m done with your games."
„Stop calling me Gojo like we’re strangers. Just hear me out-“
"Strangers? That’s what we are now, Gojo. Whatever we had, it’s over. You don’t get to decide when I listen to you."
Fuck, you hate the way tears start to burn in your eyes, how his sheer presence shakes you right to your core. Truth is, you never stopped loving him. Not even when he abused your trust like he did, not even when you caught him with Mei Mei that day. Until now, your stupid heart didn’t get the message, still clings onto him for dear life.
And it hurts like hell.
Gojo takes a deep breath in and takes a step towards you.
"Please, just listen. That night - it wasn’t what you think. I was trying to protect you, but I messed up by keeping you in the dark. I would never betray you like that. You have to believe me."
"Protect me? I saw you in Mei Mei’s room. If that wasn’t what it looked like, then explain why you were there. Don’t expect me to just forget what I saw and the way it made me feel. As if your fucking words mean everything!"
You lose it completely, your composure, those rough years of keeping you together. In that second, you lose yourself.
“That night she called me because she told me about a special grade curse that was hunting after you. I entered her room just seconds before you stumbled in. If I had known this, that she only tries to entertain herself with spreading that fucking misunderstanding between us, I would have never-“
“Have you any idea how I felt that day? You…You were my life, Satoru! I would have died for you! And you didn’t even care enough to follow me!”, you now cry out seething with emotion
“I thought I was doing the right thing!”, he shouts so roughly that you flinch.
“I thought you needed space, that we’ll talk things out when you didn’t respond countless times. I never thought…that you’d actually believe I was cheating on you! You meant everything to me too, and the thought of losing you, of not even knowing where you were, has been killing me. I’m so sorry for not chasing after you. Until this day, there’s nothing I regret more than giving you space in that fucking moment, I should have fought harder to make things right. Fuck, I missed you every single day since you were gone and it kills me, it fucking kills me I can’t call you mine anymore!”
Are those…tears glistening in his eyes. Is that really Gojo Satoru, standing in front of you, crying?
“Seeing you like this… I don’t know if it makes things better or just harder. Maybe you’re genuinely sorry, but the pain you caused me is real. It’s not something that can be fixed with words or tears alone…”
“Just one kiss.”
He draws closer, the heat of his body paired with his signature perfume now so close that you feel like fainting for a second.
“Give me one kiss and I’ll leave you alone.”
“A kiss?”, you breathe out.
His lips haunted you in your dreams frequently, how they felt pressed against yours and comforted you through everything. You hated how your mind always remembered you of what you’ve lost.
Those kissable lips, that mouth that never failed to make you smile.
But now…a kiss?
"Just one kiss, to remember what we had, to see if there’s still something between us. If it doesn’t change anything, I’ll walk away and give you all the space you need. But if there’s even a spark left… I need to know."
Your mind races as you consider his request with a wave of feelings rushing over you like a tsunami. Memories of your shared moments flood back, the warmth of his embrace, the comfort of his touch, and the sweetness of his kisses that used to light up your whole fucking world. But what if he hurts you again? What if all those words are nothing but a filthy little lie to play with you all over?
Your heart pounds while you close your eyes briefly, trying to push through the pain and the intensity of the situation. The idea of that one kiss, despite everything, pulls at your heartstrings. That moment of vulnerability and a chance to confront what’s been haunting her dreams, close enough to touch and feel...
Finally, you open your eyes and nod slowly, your voice barely a whisper.
"One kiss."
Gojo’s eyes soften with a mix of relief and hope as he leans in, his breath warm against your oversensitive and touch-starved skin. His lips meet yours with a gentle, hesitant touch. A bittersweet mixture of longing, regret, and a lingering affection that speaks of all both of you once shared, the feelings that still rise from the ashes between both of you – feelings that never really disappeared. Truth is, you never really stopped loving Gojo Satoru. Even if he shattered your heart into thousands of pieces, even if your heart still aches, you can’t escape his gravity.
Out of instinct, you wrap your longing arms around his neck like you always did, press your body even closer against his. Only that one touch, that one kiss in order to feel that he lied.
But instead, the taste his falling tears on your tongue, feel his desperate hands on your waist. Did…Gojo Satoru miss you as well?
As your lips part, a tear slips down both of your cheeks while heavy breathing fills the cramped room between you.
"From the moment you left, I’ve been lost without you. I thought I could move on, but every day without you has been unbearable. I missed you more than I ever thought possible. I’ve been living in a world where everything reminds me of what we had and what I threw away by not following you that night. I never stopped loving you, not for a single fucking day.
I know I’ve made mistakes and I’ve hurt you in ways I can never fully make up for. But standing here now, feeling your arms around me and knowing that you still care... it’s more than I deserve. I love you, and I’ve always loved you. If there’s any chance for us to rebuild what we had, I’m willing to do whatever it takes. I need you to know that my feelings for you have never faded, and they never will.”
You look at him with a mix of longing and hope, your eyes silently asking for what you’re yearning for.
"One more kiss," you whisper,
"just to see if it’s real.”
Toji Fushiguro
Your eyes are focus on the glittery liquid that swirls around in your glass, too focused on the play of color to even listen to that jerk opposite of you.
“(y/n), are you even listening to me?”
“Of course, go on”, you mutter through your hand without even looking up.
To be honest, your dating life has been a mess since that one guy. Dates each and every night, nameless men who cling onto your rock bottom for dear life. Getting showered by meaningless compliment that are supposed to drag you into their beds, the bitter taste of gammahydroxybutyricacid on a regular basis.
Just like now. Liquid ecstasy.
You raise your eyebrows, allow yourself a glimpse at that muscular guy with a face that looks like out of every plastic surgeons dream and that fake rolex around his wrist. As if you’d be dumb enough to actually swallow that shit. But on the other hand, you might as well wait until he spent all his money for you in that way too expensive restaurant before leaving him standing in the rain.
“You have to be the prettiest woman I’ve even seen”, he jeers while grabbing your hand.
You force down that wave of puke that threatens to take you over and put on the sweetest smile you have to offer.
What a loser, honestly. Not even able to read a woman properly.
But none of the men you’ve met since him were.
“Aren’t you thirsty? Don’t you like your drink?”
Yeah, like you’re dumb enough to drink that shit.
“I’d actually like to eat something before drinking. Otherwise, I’m drunk immediately”, you give back oh so innocently.
He lets out a disgusting laughter, his hungry eyes almost pilling you out of your skintight dress. Well, that’s what you get for going on a date with someone who calls himself selfmade CEO of something that has to be another lousy pyramid scheme.
Let’s get this over with.
Your eyes dart around the room aimlessly in order to find a way to escape later on. Unfortunately, the toilets don’t provide a window and as it seems, you won’t be able to escape that main hall. Screw those fancy restaurants and their high alert.
It’s a feeling that crawls up your spine so suddenly that your head yanks to the right out of instinct.
Cold eyes. That scar on the corner of his mouth that flinches when he catches you staring at him.
So familiar cold eyes that you feel like fainting for a second.
It can’t be him, it’s impossible that it’s him-
“Toji?”, you breathe out.
You haven’t seen him since that day.
Since the two of you broke up.
You swore to yourself to never see that man again, moved to Tokyo on order to get lost in the crowd, went on countless dates to fuck his face out of your mind.
But as soon as your eyes land on him, your guts twist just like they did before, a wave of fright washing over your usual so broad back.
“I need to go”, you mutter, not even caring about that douchebag on the other side of the table anymore.
You need to get out of here, need to hide in some lonely corner, need to move to another city. Or another country? It seems like he’ll always find you, no matter where you go.
The cold air of the night hits your face like a wall as you stumble out of the restaurant. Where are you supposed to go? Aimlessly, you haste through the next alley, eyes darting behind you as if you’re haunted.
That toxic fucker, that crazy man who apparently didn’t accept your breakup at all. Toji is no one to be messed with, a maniac when it comes to his toys.
And you are one of those toys. Well, you hope you were.
“Think you can escape me like that?”
The next second, you find yourself pinned against a wall with no way out.
“Let go of me, you freak”, you press out, not even daring to look up at him.
Fuck, you’re absolutely screwed. There’s no way you’ll get out of here like you did last time.
“Is that how you greet the love of your life, huh?”
He grabs your cheek firmly and forces your head towards his.
There they are, those dangerous eyes. Up close, in their full glory.
You feel like puking.
“I don’t love you anymore. You treated me like shit.”
That’s what you told yourself over and over again, literally tattooed on your heart. You can’t love a guy like him, he’ll never give you what you need and want.
“So you’re telling me that guy who wanted to fuck after your blackout is better? Can’t tell me you didn’t notice that loser put something in your drink.”
“It’s none of your business”, you hiss through gritted teeth.
“Everything that has to do with you is my business, babe. You did a good job hiding from me for a few months. But you can’t escape me”, he mutters against your ear.
His hot breath against your naked and oversensitive skin almost sends you over the edge, forces that knot inside your stomach to start pulsating all over again.
That fucker who knows your body so well. That asshole who plays with your feeling all over again.
“We’ve broke up”, you remind him with unsteady gaze.
“So you have no feelings for me? Hate me? Just because I killed that guy-“
“You killed so many people that I lost count. I can’t do this!”, you blurt out.
“But do you love me?”
Your heart almost pounds out of your chest, sweat now covering your forehead only by looking at him. So many nights, you’ve drank enough to forget your own name.
But you never forgot his.
“Doesn’t matter…”
“So you do.”
Before you’re even able to protest, he lifts you up and cages you against the wall. And your lousy traitor of a body? Wraps your legs around his waist as if none of this ever happened.
“I’ll make it up to you, princess”, he mumbles into the crook of your neck, now placing gentle kisses on your bare skin.
You want to tell him to stop, want to yank your body out of his demanding grasp.
But instead, you let your head fall back and close your eyes.
Fuck, you missed this. You missed him.
“And don’t ya dare to run away from me again. You’re mine.”
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