#i need to outlive my enemies !!! (has no enemies)

[maskedbutsilly]

tnt ur fucking duo or whatever eugh 🔥 @the-quackity-competition

[orteil42]

Cookie Clicker turns 10 today! Having outlived our enemies, let us celebrate with a fresh batch of announcements!

🍪First of all, Cookie Clicker is 40% off on Steam this week! The perfect gift for your loved and/or hated ones! (the web version is still free forever but you don't get Steam achievements or music by C418!)

🍪Secondly! The mobile version has been lagging behind the browser game for years and is in dire need of an update. I've been dedicating most of my time recently to bringing its content up to par! Here's a progress report:

Compared to the current version, this update adds back 284 upgrades and 179 achievements from the web game, which leaves 83 upgrades and 94 achievements still unimplemented plus a good amount of heavenly upgrades. I am determined to close that gap!

Seasons and the pet dragon are currently partially implemented. These are complicated, compound features with side-effects in all kinds of places so once the update gets an alpha release I'll likely be needing everyone's help to hunt for bugs and oversights. I'm being as thorough as possible but there's no way I didn't forget some obscure interplay somewhere!

I'm also updating the UI! Cookie Clicker's interface makes heavy use of woodwork, which is largely absent from the mobile version; I've been aiming to bring it back. Rather than recycling desktop assets, I'm looking to push the game's visual identity towards less "plain wooden boards" and more "victorian biscuit shop" (something I'd have liked to go for when I first made the game but didn't quite know how yet). Here's some early screenshots!

I'm using Blender for the new assets, I might make a more in-depth post about my process in the future. Please note that these are experimental and I'm still fiddling with the look! Once I'm happy with it I'll ideally be giving the desktop game a similar makeover.

This update will hopefully come out later this year and will likely involve multiple rounds of alpha. Once stable, future updates will focus on adding sugar lumps and as many of the minigames as possible.

🍪Thirdly: the Makeship grandma plushie is real and we're doing a giveaway! Please read this twitter post to enter. Note that if the launch campaign succeeds we've got other plushies in mind! Maybe a wrinkler?

🍪Fourthly - there was going to be a really cool announcement here but I've been informed I'm not yet at liberty to discuss it. It's sooooo cool tho trust me. things happening. u gotta take my word for it. tune in next time

🍪Lastly:

i've got enough dough for like, idk 50 more? mom's recipe. white+dark+milk chocolate. they're very good thank you

PS. thank you for playing with us all these years! odds are some of you reading this have been here since the very start. that's mad to think about! Opti and I couldn't have done this for 10 whole years without all of you hyping us up. i want to see if we can do 10 more. get real freaky with it

[daydreaming-paradies]

Genshin Men and Their Flower Language(s)

ᡣ𐭩 Summary: Every flower has its own language. What flower language do these genshin men have?

ᡣ𐭩 characters: Zhongli(150), Childe(151), Diluc(182), Kaeya(141)

ᡣ𐭩 Warnings: Fluff, wholesome, a bit angst in Diluc and Kaeya's part

ᡣ𐭩 ~ Want to Continue?~ part 2

art belongs to @/eriimyon on X/Twitter

Zhongli

Baby's Breath-Everlasting Love

As a former archon, he has seen people come and go. He had learned to accept it years ago however when he first met you, he once thought that you were out of his league. But you proved him wrong, you took your time understanding him. You were there whenever he talks about his stories even if you do not like history, your attention is always on him. You make him feel loved no matter what he does on a daily basis. Yes in his eyes, you are his silly lover and his one and only. He knows that he will outlive you and he will miss you dearly so if he had any flower to give you daily is baby’s breath because for you, you are his everlasting love. Even if you pass on to the afterlife, you will be forever in his memories and his one true love.

Childe

Gardenia- You're lovely, Secret Love

You are the secret love of Childe. You know that he is a harbinger and you know he loves to battle but Childe for him, seeing you after he got home from a tiring mission had brightened his day. Childe knows that he brings danger and harm to you so he keeps you a secret from his enemies. His family loves you and his siblings love you to death. In Childe’s mind, you are one of the reasons he is still kicking, the reason for him to smile..the reason to come home in one piece. Every day when he comes home to you, he always gives you Gardenia flowers yet you do not know what it means. You bugged him about it until he revealed it. “Gardenia flowers means you are lovely or secret love, mia amata.” Childe says with a smile. “That means you are my lovely secret love.”

Diluc

White Rose-I am worthy of you

Diluc Ragnvidr is the man with few words, a private person, and a man with walls to protect himself from others. To stop himself from being hurt by another loved one's death but with you, all of that is out of the window. With you alone, he is very attentive despite his nightly duties. He always makes sure to put your needs before his own. You both made a routine to give each other flowers whenever you two see each other either in privacy or in private. Your flowers is always the red rose but Diluc’s rose is white roses. You later ask Lisa what the white rose means and you were surprised to say the least. White roses means innocence and purity, you’re heavenly, secrecy and silence and I am worthy of you. Diluc was in a surprise when you hugged him, killing him with your kisses and saying to him. “Thank you, my nightly Knight.” This makes the poor man tear up and embrace you in his arms. You are both worthy of each other. Never let each other go.

Kaeya

Orange Blossom-Eternal Love

Who says that even the broken can fall in love? For Kaeya, it is him. He has been hiding his pain with a sly smile and the flirtiness, hiding the turmoil in his heart. To Kaeya, he thought that he would be alone in this world where nobody loved him nor understand until you came into his life. Kaeya was wary of you at first but after some time, he realized that you did not have any ill motives towards him. You understand him, love him for who he really is despite what others said about him. You make his life worth something and if he had to pick a flower to describe you. It would be an orange blossom flower. Even in a different universe..even if you are gone from his life, his love for you will be eternal.

~Taglist: @areislol @purpleqilinwrites @amxto @yoghurtsan @ryuryuryuyurboat @windblume-wishes @thestarswhisper @the-guardian-kitsune @sanzach @asoulsreverie @inkybloom-luv @ainescribe @kitsuvil @dxmoness @kalims @mccnstruck @dailypenpen @husky-studies

[marichive]

𝐋𝐈𝐎𝐍𝐄𝐒𝐒 : 𝐏𝐀𝐑𝐓 𝐓𝐖𝐎

Writing / roleplay prompts collected from the POV chapters of Cersei Lannister in A Feast for Crows & A Dance with Dragons , the fourth and fifth books of the ASOIAF saga. Feel free to adjust pronouns / etc. as needed.

tw: dark & mature themes, death, violence, suggestive / sexual content

❝ This must be answered fiercely! ❞

❝ She should be on her knees, begging for my help. ❞

❝ The ironmen live their whole lives at sea. ❞

❝ What has emboldened them? ❞

❝ Carrion crows make their feasts upon the carcasses of the dead and dying. They do not descend upon hale and healthy animals. ❞

❝ Reavers do not come in such strength. ❞

❝ She is making excuses for her brother. ❞

❝ The enemy of my enemy is my friend. ❞

❝ If he thinks that I am going to walk into his trap, he is a bigger fool than you. ❞

❝ He is as insolent as his sister. ❞

❝ Sad to say, all of us must deal with scum from time to time. ❞

❝ At least he has the sense to beg. ❞

❝ The castle will be yours within a fortnight if I have to tear it down with my bare hands. ❞

❝ Your courage takes my breath away. ❞

❝ You have a gallant brother. ❞

❝ Young men are overbold, and think only of the glory of battle and never of its dangers. ❞

❝ This plan of his is fraught with peril. ❞

❝ Why would you laugh? ❞

❝ Why? Elsewise I might weep. ❞

❝ That one has outlived any usefulness he ever had. ❞

❝ I had another sort of champion in mind. ❞

❝ What he lacks in gallantry he will give you tenfold in devotion. ❞

❝ So you say. Words are wind. ❞

❝ Might I ask about the armor? ❞

❝ Play me for a fool, and you’ll die screaming. ❞

❝ These walls have ears. ❞

❝ What hour is it? ❞

❝ Little sneaks, the lot of them. ❞

❝ Vapid, weepy creatures, always telling their tales and trying to worm their way between us. ❞

❝ An empty bed is a cold bed. ❞

❝ Let him weep in hell. ❞

❝ I was concerned when I woke and found you gone. ❞

❝ He does not have it in him to defy the Iron Throne. ❞

❝ She has made many friends about the court. ❞

❝ A few suitors does not concern me. ❞

❝ She repaid my kindness with betrayal. ❞

❝ I would be very sad if you ever betrayed my trust. ❞

❝ I will never give you cause to weep. ❞

❝ I want only to be close to you. To serve you, however you require. ❞

❝ And for this service, what reward will you require? ❞

❝ It pleases me to please you. ❞

❝ You hurt me. ❞

❝ It was the wine. I drank too much wine. ❞

❝ Our marriage was a melee. ❞

❝ You have a strange look in your eyes. Are you unwell? ❞

❝ I was just . . . remembering. ❞

❝ Has she lost her wits? ❞

❝ She’s . . . she’s not in a good way, if you take my meaning. ❞

❝ No, stay. One of us should get some rest, at least. ❞

❝ Gods be good, what has happened to your face? ❞

❝ Drink this. The wine will calm you. ❞

❝ Stop that weeping and tell me why you’re here. ❞

❝ Am I the only one here with a pinch of wits? ❞

❝ Your cretin of a husband wrote his own death warrant. ❞

❝ A splendid plan. Dare I ask how it went awry? ❞

❝ Sellswords have no pity. ❞

❝ An arrow gone astray, a fall from a horse, an angry boar . . . there are so many ways a man can die in the woods. ❞

❝ Where am I to go? What will I do? ❞

❝ You are weary and sick of heart, that’s plain to see. ❞

❝ I cannot have her spreading tales about the city. ❞

❝ Her grief has made her witless. ❞

❝ I am surrounded by enemies and imbeciles. ❞

❝ Why does he insist on vexing me? ❞

❝ Grin all you wish, you’ll be screaming soon enough. ❞

❝ When the time comes, I shall swat you as if you were a fly. ❞

❝ Too much wine and too little sleep. ❞

❝ Does that feel good? ❞

❝ I am the queen. I mean to claim my rights. ❞

❝ Do as you will with me. I’m yours. ❞

❝ You claimed your rights, but in the darkness I would eat your heirs. ❞

❝ She sounds as if she is being gored. ❞

❝ My sweet, how shall I pleasure you? ❞

❝ Tell me what you would have of me, my love. ❞

❝ His wounds are grievous. ❞

❝ Tell me. I want to know all of it, from the beginning to the end. ❞

❝ I do not want her to hear these tidings from a stranger. I will tell her myself. ❞

❝ How did he die? ❞

❝ I would spare you the worst of it. ❞

❝ Dying is not dead. ❞

❝ I know what you want. Get out. ❞

❝ Now you know how I felt, the night he died. ❞

❝ Let me be avenged at long last. ❞

❝ I see you are as lovely as the tales. Even beyond the Narrow Sea we have heard of your great beauty. ❞

❝ It is my hope I can at least offer you some balm for your pain. ❞

❝ I bring you justice. ❞

❝ It was a proud name once, before he dishonored it. ❞

❝ I suppose it was too much to hope for. ❞

❝ I ought to have him strangled. ❞

❝ It saddens me to see you so careworn. I say, run off and play and leave the Hand to hear these tiresome petitions. ❞

❝ We could dress as serving girls and spend the day amongst the smallfolk. ❞

❝ You are a wicked thing to tempt me so. ❞

❝ Drunk on gods, the lot of them. ❞

❝ Do not presume to preach at me. ❞

❝ They peck at you like a murder of crows. Every one wants a piece of your flesh. ❞

❝ I won’t let you hurt her. I won’t. ❞

❝ When I kissed her cheek, I could taste the salt of her tears. ❞

❝ Turn away. There is nothing here for you. ❞

❝ Never wake a sleeping sorceress. ❞

❝ You will not like my answers. ❞

❝ When will I wed the prince? ❞

❝ You will wed the king. ❞

❝ I require something stronger. Something that will not let me dream. ❞

❝ What did I just say? Have your ears grown as feeble as your cock? ❞

❝ Some doors are best left closed. ❞

❝ No harm will ever come to him as I live. ❞

❝ Blood magic is the darkest kind of sorcery. Some say it is the most powerful as well. ❞

❝ Swords have two edges. ❞

❝ The very men who guard her could be used to bring her down. ❞

❝ Her lovers are not like to confess, knowing it would mean their heads as well as hers. ❞

❝ I did my best to ease his passing. ❞

❝ I provide her with sleeping draughts and . . . other sorts of potions. ❞

❝ Are you blind or bought? ❞

❝ He stood in her way, so she put him in his grave. ❞

❝ My loyalty has always been to the crown, to the realm. ❞

❝ What I want to know is why she has need of you. ❞

❝ I’ll hear the truth, or you’ll wear chains. ❞

❝ I know what moon tea is for. ❞

❝ Get off your knees and try to remember what it was to be a man. ❞

❝ Moon tea. How foolish of her. Why would she do such a thing, take such a risk? ❞

❝ She has appetites he cannot satisfy. ❞

❝ She may claim he never touched her, but I will not believe it. ❞

❝ My son has been betrayed. ❞

❝ She has a lover. ❞

❝ She’s got a pretty little neck. A good sharp sword will go right through it. ❞

❝ I am awash in roses. ❞

❝ Treason is treason, but we must have proof. ❞

❝ We need to catch them during the deed. ❞

❝ She is too shrewd to be caught so easily. ❞

❝ Their names will live in shame. ❞

❝ It is in your blood. ❞

❝ Will you consent to serve? ❞

❝ It is easy to see why you are her favorite. ❞

❝ The man will confess before the night is done. ❞

❝ I am sorry if the guards were rough with you. ❞

❝ Her scheming forced this on me. She has soiled me with her treachery. ❞

❝ I must be strong. What I must do, I do for him and the realm. ❞

❝ Piss on your prophecy. ❞

❝ In a world so full of treachery, that was worth a few kisses. ❞

❝ She is no worse than most men. ❞

❝ A bath will set you right, my sweet. ❞

❝ It will go hard on him, to lose them all. ❞

❝ There is more of sly than shy in her. ❞

❝ Stay with me. I do not want to sleep alone. ❞

❝ Please, not my children, do not harm my children. ❞

❝ Did I scream? I’m sorry. ❞

❝ Why does he frighten you so? ❞

❝ I want to see my son. ❞

❝ All I do, I do for him. ❞

❝ I was never so sweet and innocent. ❞

❝ In this world the weak are always the victims of the strong. ❞

❝ You did me a valiant service once, but now I have a harder task for you. ❞

❝ Aye, and I have something hard for you. ❞

❝ It’s you I want. ❞

❝ You may take all the kisses you like. ❞

❝ Are you refusing to obey me? ❞

❝ The thing is, the best lies have some truth in them. ❞

❝ I would not want it said I made a liar of you. ❞

❝ Give me an hour, and meet me in my bedchamber. ❞

❝ We waited long enough. ❞

❝ You can keep the crown on. I like you in the crown. ❞

❝ First we must dance the dance and never miss a step. ❞

❝ A sweet face often hides a sinner’s heart. ❞

❝ I do not believe a word of this. ❞

❝ He is young and lusty, I will grant you. ❞

❝ A fool he may be, but he wears his folly honestly. ❞

❝ I am free of your croaking malice at last. ❞

❝ The smallfolk are fond of her. ❞

❝ They will not take well to this. ❞

❝ It must not come to blood, and I mean to see that it does not. ❞

❝ You are mistaken. A lion never cries. ❞

❝ I pray that I never offend you. You are terrible when roused. ❞

❝ Any mother would do the same to protect her children. ❞

❝ When do you mean to bring that boy of yours to court? ❞

❝ Last night I confessed to the Septa that I wished to scratch her eyes out. ❞

❝ Damn them all to the seven hells. ❞

❝ I love them all, and they love me. ❞

❝ He will never have a wife that you don’t hate. ❞

❝ I am not your daughter, thank the gods. ❞

❝ You are being foolish. I am only here to help you. ❞

❝ I will teach them what it means to put a lion in a cage. ❞

❝ Do not presume to touch me. ❞

❝ I need you now as I have never needed you before. ❞

❝ I love you. I love you. I love you. ❞

❝ I ask only as a mother, fearful for her child. ❞

❝ I was lonely and afraid. ❞

❝ I did not know who to trust, so I . . . I used the only means that I had to bind them to me. ❞

❝ Did you take him into your bed to win his loyalty as well? ❞

❝ He was kind and gentle and I needed someone. ❞

❝ Do they say I am a skinchanger now? A warg? ❞

❝ There is no shred of truth to it. I deny it. ❞

❝ I fucked him on the morning of my wedding. ❞

❝ It is good to see you smiling again. ❞

❝ You are still angry with me. I hear it in your voice. ❞

❝ He wanted me more than I ever wanted him. ❞

❝ Let them slaughter each other, the realm will be the better for it. ❞

❝ She was just a child, my precious princess. ❞

❝ No harm will come to me today. Only my pride will suffer. ❞

❝ I will not give you the pleasure of hearing me beg. ❞

❝ Hair grows back. ❞

❝ Remove your shift. ❞

❝ Do you find this amusing? ❞

❝ One day I will have your tongue ripped out with hot pincers, and that will be hilarious. ❞

❝ I will see you safely through the city. ❞

❝ My blood and my betrayer. ❞

❝ That was not supposed to happen. ❞

❝ I would have made her a good marriage. ❞

❝ If he’d only done as he was told, we would have never gone to war. ❞

❝ I can do this. I must. ❞

❝ Vain and proud she was, before. So haughty you’d think she’d forgotten she came from dirt. ❞

❝ I am a lioness. I will not cringe for them. ❞

❝ These creatures have no sweeter joy in life than jeering at their betters. ❞

❝ They think that this will break my pride, that it will make an end to me, but they are wrong. ❞

❝ I am not afraid. I am a lioness. ❞

❝ All hail the royal teats. ❞

❝ Have you forgotten who I am? ❞

��� You do not need to drag me. ❞

❝ It will be over soon, it will be behind me, then I can forget. ❞

❝ I am beautiful, the most beautiful woman in all of Westeros. ❞

❝ He never loved me, but he saw that I was beautiful. He wanted me. ❞

[nervoussystemss]

Not a prompt!

Part 1

The hero had no clue of the time or the hour, nor how much time had passed since the villain had left. All they felt was dizzy and disoriented, and they gulped in labored breaths.

They blacked out for a second time.

"Oh, God, I hope I didn't break you." The villain's voice sounded far away. Unsurprisingly, they didn't sound the least bit concerned.

The hero didn't want to open their eyes to see the world upside down again, but still, what other choice did they have? They cracked one eye open, and the world really was no longer upside down, but... "What is this?"

"I strapped you to a wheel. More specifically, one that spins. You know, like in... I don't know, jeopardy?" The villain joked, itching at the back of their neck. "I don't know. I don't keep up with game shows too often."

"I'm pretty sure jeopardy doesn't have a spinning wheel." They really did not like the look in the villain's eyes.

"Ah, well, no matter. It does now." There was a whirring sound, and along the opposite wall, a set of knives was revealed, all aimed at the hero.

Their eyes bugged out. "What... uh, what exactly is that?"

"Oh, well, it's simple!" they beamed proudly. "I made this game up myself! Me as host, of course. I press that red button over there and knives shoot at you! Isn't it great?" The hero opened their mouth to speak, but the villain didn't let them get a peep in. "And! What's better is I can spin the wheel while the knives shoot at you, so it's only a 50/50 chance one'll nick you!"

"You have to be insane. There's no other possible reason why you're doing this." The hero needed to stay calm, but damn it, it was hard. Still, it didn't stop them from trying to snark back. "I'm going to need you to check yourself in to the nearest mental hospital stat."

"Well, that depends. Me being 'insane' and going through with this, I mean," they grinned. "Are you going to answer my questions and give me what I want?"

Lightbulb. Of course they weren't fully insane. They wanted something. Of course they did. "What do you want?"

"To figure out how you work." They shrugged. "Or, more specifically, how you're immortal."

"How come?"

The villain raised a brow. Waited for them to connect the dots.

"Oh God. Oh no. No, absolutely not. Immortality is a—"

"If you say curse, I will press that button right now and one of the knives will most likely lodge itself somewhere inside your body, and then I probably won't even get you medical attention because you're immortal, but you'll be in pain and suffer and there will just be blood everywhere and it'll be super messy and I'd really rather not clean that up because blood makes me queasy and not to mention it's difficult to get blood off concrete, or at least I think it is, plus—"

"Why would you even want to be immortal?" the hero snapped, cutting the other off.

"Hellooo? What sane person wouldn't?" They grinned, eyes alight with what seemed like mania. "Never being able to die sounds like a dream come true for me. Outliving your enemies. Seeing the world change. Being able to cause havoc and discord and whatnot without fearing death."

"Immortality in the wrong hands is dangerous."

"And I assume you're the right hands." Their tone turned slightly annoyed.

"I am the right hands."

"Mm. Sure you are, for now." They took a step closer, examining their wary eyes. "But do tell me, what happens when you reach a thousand? A million? You think you'll have your morality intact?"

The hero's jaw clenched. They leaned forward as best they could while being strapped to the wheel, glaring into the villain's eyes, and, "I think I'll still be better than you."

A flicker of surprise was shown in the villain's eyes, but other than that, no reaction was given. Then they exhaled slowly. Jaw muscles tightened. A slightly forced smile. The wheel began to slowly spin as they made their way towards the red button. Despite their irritation, they were still going to enjoy this. They'd get what they wanted one way or another. "Have it your way."

They slammed a hand on the button.

[physalian]

Character Types: Schemers

Saltburn was one of those pure shock value movies, putting spectacle above rewatchability, imo, but that moth monologue was great, and it’s all about how the protagonist is a schemer. Reminds me of Squidward’s accusations to Plankton in The Spongebob Movie and I mean that with 100% sincerity.

Schemers probably need no explanation, but these are characters that sacrifice a couple battles to win the war, these are the quiet ones who come out of nowhere in the last lap. If they’re villains, they’ll probably botch it, if they’re anti-heroes, they’ll probably eek out a victory, but these types usually aren’t full-blown heroes as “scheming” is seen as unheroic, but more on that at the end.

So! I’ve collected a couple of my favorites, because this time I haven’t written one to gush about worth spoiling to hell and back (but I do have one, and he’s campy as hell).

The Villain Schemer

Starscream

Top of the list is, to no one’s surprise if you follow me, Starscream. Specifically the iteration in Transformers Prime as I know that one the best and that show has some of the best character work in the franchise.

Starscream is forever second-best to his Lord and Master, Megatron. He’s second-in-command to the entire Decepticon contingent, a former Energon Seeker (a title which only he cares about and thinks it’s cool as the group went defunct before Cybertron went dark), and is quite like a cockroach. Somehow, he just keeps narrowly escaping death.

Despite everything against him at one point, low on fuel, no friends, no allies, barely a shot in the giant fetch quest to the finish line, he catches a lucky break and manages to fool the Autobots, sneak right past their defenses to steal all the MacGuffins, and then leverages and silver-tongues his way back into the good graces of the Decepticons.

Schemers are usually not physically strong, as to have both a skilled fighter and tactician in one character is OP (and leaves the argument open of why you’d be a schemer by choice if you can Punch Things to solve your problems). He only uses his guns maybe five or six times in the whole show. This version of his design is very sleek and slender. He prefers to use his claws or his wrist-rockets (he transforms into a fighter jet). Back him into a corner and he’ll probably try to either fly away, grovel for mercy, play himself up as weak and defenseless and thus a pathetic and unjust kill, or be completely unaware of how screwed he is and get his ass beat.

He’s got variety.

Starscream’s big thing though is his ego, the fatal flaw of most schemers. He thinks he’s better than everyone else, even when he’s t-cog-less and unable to transform, crawling around in the dirt scrounging for energon once he’s gone rogue. Every chance he gets, he’s either fluffing up his scant accomplishments, trying to undermine Megatron, or trying to prove how loyal he is to Megatron, and the Big M allows this because… it’s entertaining, I think.

Yet, miraculously, this mech always survives. He outlives Megatron at least thrice in this show alone. He always either has a backup plan, has a secret weapon, or is able to just weasel out of capture or execution. He’s an idiot, but he can also be incredibly clever, using Autobot mercy against them a la “you wouldn’t shoot a defenseless prisoner” or “you wouldn’t leave a bot to die even though we all know I deserve it”.

And on top of all that, he’s just really funny. Whether it’s his exaggerated movements, like how his wings will flap when he’s excited, or the one time he dances pretty provocatively in front of his whole crew chanting “All Hail Starscream” after one of Megatron’s deaths. Or when he’s his own worst enemy, getting himself into sticky situations because he just can’t let anyone else have the last word.

Plankton

Another funny schemer is the aforementioned Plankton, in a show that’s a whole lot less dramatic. Whenever he’s in an episode he’s whipping up yet another convoluted plan to steal the Krabby Patty formula, but while he can be mean and a little cruel with his insults, nobody hates Plankton. He never wins, his failures are funny, and Krabs is kind of a dick. Sometimes, you’re even rooting for him.

Maven Calore

On the complete opposite end of the humor scale, there’s Maven, from the Red Queen series. Yet another wimp both physically and magically, Maven is the second-born to the throne, who, at first, actually seems like he’s not out to steal it from his older brother like Claudius in Hamlet.

But of course….

Maven, like another character on this list, is a master of social engineering. His most famous line in the series is, “The truth is what I make it. I could set this world on fire and call it rain.”

He fools everyone, even the heroine and his brother, more than once into thinking he’s redeemable and in the third book, he and the heroine spend quite some time together where she’s trying desperately to find any shred of a decent man inside him, while he proves again and again that that man died when he was a kid, abused out of him by the queen, and that he’s not even mad about it, it’s just who he is, and she should really stop trying so hard to fix something that can’t be glued back together.

Maven is one cruel fucker, too, either orchestrating or permitting the deaths of quite a few major characters along with everything he does to the protagonist. He’s a fascinating look into the “I can fix him” trope and what it does to the people who have been convinced that it’s their duty to continue suffering abuse for the sake of family or kinship.

I wish this series was more popular, I only know one other person who read it, and they recommended it to me.

Loki

Gonna stick him here because there's just so many versions of this mythological figure, dating back literal centuries. Marvel's Loki is... a hot mess of inconsistencies. So, in general, Loki is at best, occasionally helpful if it also serves his own interests, but he's usually depicted as an obstacle. Honorary mention because everybody knows who he is.

The Anti-Hero Schemer

Lelouch vi Britannia

I get to gush about Code Geass finally, yay. But first, an honorable mention to Light Yagami (a full villain schemer). Didn’t like Death Note and don’t remember it well enough to properly comment on all of Light’s schemes but he’s not even an anti-hero, he’s a straight-up villain protagonist. People just mistakenly thought that Light and Lelouch were in any way comparable… and they’re not.

Apologies, Death Note fans. I don’t like your man.

Lelouch vi Britannia is the protagonist of Code Geass, a mecha anime probably most famous to anyone who doesn’t know it for the Pizza Hut ad campaign and “why are you buying clothes in the soup store?!”

His whole story is revenge on and the toppling of the Britannian empire and its emperor, his supremely assholeish father, who got his mom (the queen-consort) killed and shipped him and his only full-blooded sister off as political prisoners to Japan.

Lelouch is… a beautiful, smart, dumbass. He’s hyperbolically unfit, winded even by climbing a short staircase (like I said, schemers are usually wimps), but a brilliant military strategist and tactician. But above all else, he’s a master at social engineering.

On top of Code Geass being a mecha anime, it’s also got a whole supernatural lore about “geass” an ‘absolute’ superpower held by a couple different characters of the show, and Lelouch’s is absolute obedience. Whenever he geasses somebody, if it is within their power or knowledge to accomplish or provide, they are compelled absolutely to follow his command. With the massive caveat being that he can only use it on a person once in their lifetime (until shenanigans ensue).

Lelouch’s whole story is about gaining social power over his opponent, starting from basically nothing as he’s moonlighting as a high school student of vaguely noble standing. If anyone figures out that he’s actually a prince, his whole plan goes belly up. Why? His plan is to ignite a rebellion in Japan against Britannia, by creating a masked vigilante, Zero, the Man of Miracles, a man of the people, definitely not a blue-blood prince of the enemy. So ensues two seasons of absolute insanity as Lelouch’s rebellion unfolds and collateral damage collapses around him.

Lelouch is his own worst enemy. His ego and arrogance constantly bite him in the ass and he loses constantly, which, to me, is what made him far more likable than somebody like Light, who always won. He’s not above sacrificing a few for the needs of the many, even when those few are people or relatives of people he cares deeply about. He’s not above using his power of non-consent to get what he needs on anyone, no matter how much he knows they’d hate him if they knew he used it on them. He’s not above lying, manipulating, or tossing people under the bus if it furthers his goals.

But he’s not a villain. While it can be argued, even by Lelouch himself, that Japan and all the members of the rebellion that he helped raise from nothing, were just pieces on his chessboard and meaningless to him, that all he cares about is revenge and not an actual free Japan… he’s lying. Otherwise the show would not have ended the way it did, and it remains recognized as one of the best endings to any anime ever.

Schemer Heroes?

Schemers usually aren’t heroes for one big reason: They’re selfish, and selfishness is unheroic. Even with the best of intentions, like the anti-hero or morally-grey hero, the schemer’s personal goals are always, first and foremost, top priority, and if the group benefits, it’s a happy coincidence.

I’m wracking my brain trying to think of one who would qualify and while there are plenty of schemer protagonists, they’re the antithesis of the hero we’re supposed to root for, and I think it says something about us as a society.

Tyrion Lannister

If he counts, the best one I can think of is Tyrion Lannister (did not read the books, only saw most of the show). He’s yet another wimp** who has to rely on his wits and his smarts to compete and stay ahead in the world once he figures out that his money and his name won’t save him forever. And in the Game of Thrones, you either win or you die.

He does do some shady things here or there, but aside from maybe Samwell, every character in that show has done some morally dubious things.

Honorable mention to Varys, who is absolutely a schemer, but I couldn’t figure out where to put him on this list. And Littlefinger, who’s a schemer villain, but he didn’t stick the landing (thanks D&D). GOT is made up of schemers, really. I just… don’t want to keep giving GRRM free advertising.

**wimp only in that he's not physically abled like the other characters and cannot rely on his skill with a sword, only his words.

—

All in all, schemers take a ton of planning to be written believably, because their wits are their strongest trait. To write a super intelligent character, you really have to have all your ducks in a row so you can show their thought processes and how their plans unfold, instead of only saying “they’re super smart, trust me”.

Even when schemers are cruel, what makes them distinct from annoying assholes is that there’s some part of their character that’s impossible to argue with. They’re right, even if you hate to admit it, about even one tiny thing in the world.

Why? Because they spit in the face of lawful good and evil. They know the good guys have lines they won’t cross, and it will get people killed. They know the bad guys (usually society at large) needs to be stopped, and they might be bad, but either society forced their hand, or they’re not as bad as the alternative.

My schemer in ENNS is just a straight-up asshole, but he knows how to manipulate the heroes to get what he wants and his plan works.

They do have to succeed, otherwise they’re just idiots. They need a few wins under their belts to prove their competence as a proper schemer and not just a guy blowing smoke. Wondering if this will be the time they flop on their face, or wondering what line they’ll cross to escape this time, is what makes them so entertaining.

[mybookof-you]

2024.11.06

I awoke earlier than usual this morning after a restless night of sleep.  Coffee was brewing as I heard the news piping into the kitchen that America, my country, was destined for an eminent Trump presidency.  I reacted at first with disbelief, but as further information was delivered the reality became clear.  My heart is broken.  I sat with my warm mug alongside my husband taking in this reality.  I have been crying for about an hour or two.  So much inexpressible grief and concern for those who will be most ill-effected.  So much worry for the direction of the future of our planet and our global human connection. 

The news I watched pointed to the fact that Trump represented a change in economies that spoke to middle America.  I cannot blame people for wanting to preserve their pockets, homes, and families or values they feel are eroding.  I do not believe Trump’s answers will fully realize those hopes for positive change, but it looks like we are going to find out.  I believe he is the wrong answer to those concerns.

I fear that Trump’s presidency will deliver authoritarian rule in a way we will not be able to overcome for generations.  Again, it looks like we are going to find out just what a second Trump presidency will bring.  Most of all, I fear that people who will be devastated by the coming administration will not be heard, and their muffled cries will go silently into the darkness, forgotten like so many who have historically been marginalized, dealt with, and eliminated. 

I fear for Ukraine, Israel, Palestine, and Taiwan.  I fear for under-represented groups like the LGBTQ community, communities of color, and the poor who suffer beneath a structure which keeps them from rising above their situation.  The elderly.  The expendable. 

I fear for our planet, and the future of all creatures which depend upon it.  The answer may come from the science that has already explained the climate change we are experiencing.  That devastation will predictably continue exponentially if we do not act responsibly.  The future may be on Mars.  The future may be aided by genetically modified plants and new methods of growing food.  I believe science will help us in our uncertain future.  

Though, I would rather not go there.  The state of health of planet Earth is the only area I wish to move backward and promote a more sustainable lifestyle, economy, and direction based on interdependence of people from across small, local communities to the global community.  We all matter, and more than us, the Earth itself is a precious gift we, the top of the food chain, were trusted to steward and preserve.  Our very lives depend on the stability of the ecosystem we selfishly trash in order to serve our immediate needs.  We can attempt to synthesize what we need to survive the destruction we bear responsibility for, but if the Earth’s design and system of functioning has worked why fix it?  Why not listen to what She is saying and change to follow Her lead.  She will outlive all of us, whether we are lucky enough to be here or not.  She does not need us.  We need Her.

We need one another.  I do not want to move backward toward dehumanizing those who are not like us.  The human self-centered thing to do in crisis is to square-off and draw lines between ourselves and those who do not share our perspectives, our cultures, and our skin color.  It is easy to fall into that false sense of security, when, in truth, our future is safer and more sound when we consider the whole of creation, all people, all creatures, and all elements of our world.   

Purging and sanitizing the world of anything we do not accept as our personal own is not a solution.  It is self-deprecating.  It is a plan to eliminate and silence perceived enemies and create new ones.  It is an unending path toward bloodshed.  It is genocide.  It is an endless cycle of victimization from which no one is guaranteed protection. 

I would advocate the preservation of all life.  Communication.  Understanding.  Respectful disagreement.  Compromise.  Solutions reached to promote all peoples and all of life.  There are most certainly no easy solutions.  My hope is that viable solutions which value all of us are attained.  That is what I will attempt to work toward within the tiny space I occupy and continue to find hope.  Tomorrow is another day, and I claim it for me and for you, for all of us and for everything.

[inkmonster21]

Sing for Me

10. The Revenge

Cooper Howard × Fem!Reader / The Ghoul × Fem!Reader

She's a singer the nation adores. He's the actor everyone respects. What happens when these two get entangled in a heated affair? Passion, regret, rage, and even murder will commence.

From before the bombs drop to the vast wasteland, these two souls live for one another.

Previous Chapter

Series Masterlist

Tagged: @fallout-girl219 @harmfulb1tch @themadhattersqueen @one-of-thewalkingdead

Seconds before I’m about to walk out the door, Miss Williams's warning rings in my head. I allow the madness to take hold of me. I retrieved the small listing device from all those months ago. Something in me wouldn’t allow me to throw it away the first time.

The drive was no less frustrating. The closer I got the more I wondered about the warning. Vault Tech was indeed crooked, but killers? I couldn’t wrap my mind around such a theory.

I’m escorted to Barb’s office. The meeting is running late. Such a surprise. As I sit alone in the silent space. The darkness creeps in once more. I dig into my pocket and grasp the listening device placing it inside my ear. The static clears and voices can be heard.

“Mr. Howard, would you mind if Barb’s assistant pops in for a quick hello? He’s a big fan.” I nod with the practiced actor's smile, “of course.”

She dips back behind the doorway leaving me to listen to the conversations in the meeting room. “Our sales are fine. Sure, rumors of the peace negotiations have set us back a bit, but we're here to offer you an opportunity. We'd like to collaborate on some of our vaults.”

“I-I don't get the vaults. When it's time to come out, what if people are still alive on the surface?

They'll be Stone Age creatures. Probably eat whoever steps out of your vaults.”

“That isn't an issue. Our vaults have the resources to survive for centuries. Meanwhile, our competitors... you know, every other human

who isn't us... will be dead on the surface. Because after all, what is the ultimate weapon of mass destruction?”

“Time is the apex predator. And in the event of an incident, time is the weapon with which we will defeat all of our enemies. That is how we will win the great game of capitalism. Not by outfighting anyone, but by outliving them.”

“Even if you outlive all external threats, here's my problem with the vaults. You confine a bunch of rats in a nest for a long time, they end up eating each other. So who's to say your rats are gonna survive better than those animals on the surface?”

Everyone overlaps each other bickering back and forth to no end. “If I could refocus the discussion.” Barb's voice pipes up, “When I think about the future, I think about my daughter... Janey. How do I provide her with a better future? That's what we've invited you here to discuss.” They agree in the room. “And how do we design our vault societies so our children have that better future? I suggest we hedge our bets. Bud here has an idea for three interconnected vaults. But we need more ideas. We need your ideas. Because it was the spirit of competition that made our companies great, and I propose we bring that same spirit of competition to our solution.”

“We have over a hundred vaults spread across America. Enough for each of you to claim several, where you can play out your own ideas for how to create the perfect conditions for humanity. Whatever you want to do, no one needs to know. And may the best idea win.”

I can’t believe what I am hearing. Humans are viewed as nothing more than experiments.

“So what's Vault 32 and 33? Just people to be controlled?”

“What? No! When you put it like that, it sounds downright morally questionable. They're our breeding pool, the ultimate expression of HR R&D. Genetically selected to breed with my Buds to create a class of super managers. People with positivity, people who make lemonade. People who will inherit the Earth after we've wiped the surface clean. I have our first test subject lined up for freezing in the upcoming months.”

“We could intentionally overcrowd a vault so people have to compete to survive inside it.

We have been developing a Synthetic humanoid bot replicating (y/n) (l/n). It has a memory hard drive the size of a large computer. I would like to see a vault governed by it.”

“What about using a vault to develop a super-mutant soldier using illegal immigrants?”

“We could pump psychotropic drugs into the air supply.”

“We could separate parents and children, and only the smartest kids reach adulthood.”

“There's a lot of earning potential with the end of the world. But we're talking about making a significant investment based on a hypothetical. How can you guarantee results?”

Silence resumes before my heart clenches and my mouth falls agape at the words I hear ring in my head. Barb's chilling voice speaks, “By dropping the bomb ourselves.”

“Mr. Howard? Everything all right, Mr. Howard?” I shake my head, in shock, I get to compose myself but just remain a shell of a man. They are going to kill her…

“Uh, fine. I'm-I'm... I'm-I'm fine, Betty.” She opens the door further, “He is so excited to meet you.” A young skinny man walks through the door. He grasps my hand, “Mr. Howard.

Huge fan. I'm Henry, but, uh, everyone calls me Hank. Wow. I played for (y/n) at the wrap party.”

Did he? Poor soul of a boy was so unrememberable. I shake his hand with a ghostly smile. “You know, that scene? That scene where you shoot Joey Toro in the face? Feo, fuerte y formal.” He stumbles over his words, “I was just wondering, if-if... if you don't mind, um, I hate to be that guy, but, do you think you could give me an autograph?” As requested he gets what he wants. A quick scratch of my signature on a slip of paper.

Barb slipped into her office just as I passed Hank the paper. “Oh, Cooper. I didn’t know you’d be here this early. Sorry, you had to wait.” I shake my head, begging myself to remain calm. “Did you sign them?” I rush her, trying to leave this building full of sorry excuses of Americans' work.

She opens up a folder and examines the contents inside. With a nod of her head, Barb shuts it with a grin, passing it to me. Lo and behold she did sign it. I leave the building feeling my heart beat out of my chest. I have to get home to my love. This all could’ve been a ploy to get her alone.

I rush home, bursting through the door, and go right to the living room. Empty. I walk to the kitchen. Empty. Bedroom? Empty. Basement? Empty.

“(Y/n)?” I double-check the entire house twice. And still no sign of her. “(Y/n)!” Screaming and tracking my steps backward. I run out the back and into the barn. Sugarfoot remains as happy as could be, but no (y/n) inside. “Where are you at, honey? (Y/n)!” My head begins spinning. She’s gone…

“Cooper?” I spin around at the speed of lightning. There at the entrance of the barn stood (y/n) safe and sound. I rush for her, gathering her frame in my arms. “Are you okay?” She asks, running her delicate finger through my hair. I hold her close, a firm grip on her. She was mine to protect and that I would do until I was sent to my grave.

~

“What is this?” Cooper asks holding up a check from Vault Tech. “Oh, I got a call a few weeks ago. They told me I was needed back in the lab because they had to do a remodel on the bots. I'm assuming that’s the check.” I return to my notebook trying to compose.

“You didn’t tell me.” “Did I need to?” He stares at me, an unreadable expression covering his face. “I would’ve appreciated it.” I nod, “Okay. I’ll make sure to let you know in the future.” Once again I return to the notebook.

“Did anyone say anything to you?” I look up at him, “like what?” “Like… out of line, or unprofessional.” I shake my head, furrowing my brows. “No. Everyone was very nice.” “What did you do there?” “I picked out wigs for the bot out of the choices they had made and I picked out the makeup that would be applied.” He stays silent, his foot tapping as he thinks. I close my notebook and adjust my body to face him, “Is there something wrong?”

“No, no. Just… didn’t expect you to do any more business with them.” I narrow my eyes at him in confusion. “It’s money, Coop. We’ve got bills. I don’t tour for another 6 months. Is it that big of a deal?”

He runs a hand through his hair, “Yeah it is.” A nervous sweat engulfed him. “You… we shouldn’t do any business with them. Not anymore.” He practically pleads as he grabs my hand. Tracing the lines on my palm, memorizing their curves. “Okay, if that’s what you want.” Confused and slightly worried. I comfort him in the presence of my arms. He relaxed at the touch.

~

Cooper was gone filming, and I lazily lay on the couch having a day for myself. Cheese plate on the coffee table and a glass of wine in hand. The phone rings causing me to roll my eyes.

“Hello, (y/n) speaking.”

“(Y/n)! Henry here.”

I furrow my brows. “Hi, what can I help you with?” He gulps on the other side of the line, “Listen, we need you to come down to the labs in 31. We’ve got some remodels to get your approval of.” I bite my lip. “Oh, Henry I wish I could, but-“ he interrupted with haste, “it will only take a few minutes. Promise.” I sigh looking at the clock. Cooper was busy on set, and I had no way of reaching him.

“Only a few minutes,” I say in a firm tone. “Yes, yes, of course! Just meet me outside the building and I’ll escort you to 31.”

~

The large metal door closed behind me with a loud mechanical hum. "Geez." I laugh awkwardly. It's so quiet in here. "I've never been down this far before." Henry leads the way silently. "They're just around the corner, here." I look behind me, my nerves growing. Something doesn't sit right. "Where is everyone?" He doesn't answer, instead, he walks over to a number pad and types away. To my right sits rows of large glass pods. One individual opens with a hiss. The freezing vapor seeps from the pod quickly. "What’s going on?" Before I can turn around I feel a sharp prick in my neck. "Ouch!" I grab my neck and force myself to turn around, my muscle’s already losing functionality.

There she stands with an empty injection needle and a stone-cold expression. "Barb?" I ask in shock, "What did you do to me?" I feel myself sway, my legs losing the ability to hold myself up. "We needed a test subject, and well, you didn't read the fine print in your contract." I fall the the ground, grasping the edges of her dress. "Barb, please." She glares at me, "You want me to take pity on you? After everything you did to me, you're lucky this is as far as I am going to go. Have a nice nap, (y/n)." I collapse fully onto the metal floor completely unconscious.

~

While (y/n) was frozen, her home was ransacked, her belongings torn into, and valuables gathered. Random items such as photo books, jewelry, clothing, makeup, and random items were taken and put into boxes. Samples of her blood scattered about the home. A knife lay on the kitchen floor with her fingertips. A home invasion turned wrong in the worst ways possible.

The worst sight for Cooper Howard to return home to. Their home is broken into, furniture and belongings broken, and his songbird missing from the cage. Her blood painting the grounds of the property.

Calling the police did nothing. Cooper was looked at as the main suspect. Struggle actor with a young successful beauty on his arm? Why not marry her in haste and claim her fortune? They were wrong in every part. The only reason he got off was because they were unable to find a body. No body no crime.

However, the public didn’t view it as such. If his reputation wasn’t ruined before it was now. Half the people blamed him, calling him a murderer as he walked down the street, and then some souls would take pity on him. The only thing to do was drown himself in drinks and other questionable substances. Cooper Howard was struggling more day by day.

[baroque-hashem]

Hello - sorry to bother you! I’ve seen a lot of your posts about leftist antisemitism and then the associated hate anons.

I am positively horrified by the way young people—my generation (Gen Z, though I’m a cusper) in particular—are becoming quite literally violently antisemitic over a definition of Zionism they completely made up.

I studied radicalisation and extremism at university, and even still I’m simply at a loss for words.

While I am certainly on the left of the political spectrum, the term ‘leftist’ has left such a bad taste in my mouth since the 7th of Oct. I don’t feel comfortable identifying as such anymore.

Sorry about this being disjointed and a bit rambley. I just wanted to offer my support and commiserations. Kinda just scared of what the world is becoming.

No bother! Thanks for sending this my way. And it doesn't feel disjointed, but even if it did that's okay. It's a scary time for Jews. We're watching people we called allies turn their backs on us. I had an older Jewish woman tell me the other day, "We fought with them for civil rights, we fought with them for gay rights, we fought with them for women's rights. Where are they now when we need them to fight with us?" It was heartbreaking because she's right. I think David Baddiel had a point when he said "Jews don't count" to leftists. It's disappointing. It's disturbing. I wish I knew how to fix it. I don't. There's a reason antisemtism is called the oldest hatred. It's persisted for disturbingly long. I think all we can really do is continue to fight disinformation and hatred with education and empathy. There's a reason Jews say Am Yisrael Chai. We live. We persist. We have outlived all of our enemies. And we will outlive this.

יברך אותך ה' וישמרך

[theunmarkedtombstone]

Typing Teenage Dirtbag aesthetic on pinterest is a disgrace, don't ask me why I was at the Devil's Sacrament, I get it, but my God no one actually understands that being a teenage dirtbag is supposed to be abt being a loser and not being a functioning teenager.

People who are NOT teenage dirtbags:

- Heath Ledger in 10 Things I Hate About You (hot, and people were afraid of him, which made him popular, even if for the wrong reasons. He scored the most beautiful girl in the world not by luck, but by actually putting in effort even if he was doing it for money. She literally wrote a poem for him. Clearly fucks).

- Effy Stonem from Skins (hot, knows it, has an actual sex life).

- Avril Lavigne (pop punk star who was almost a teenage dirtbag, but was also the consumer version of what a teenage dirtbag is) (I'm With You still fucks severely though).

- Chad Michael Murray in Freaky Friday (I genuinely don't remember his character that much but he fell in love with both Lindsay Lohan and Lindsay Lohan in Jamie Lee Curtis' body and attempted to pull HER, so idk that to me involves a level of confidence a teenage dirtbag shouldn't really possess. Also he's hot).

- Daria Morgendorffer from Daria (absolutely clinically depressed and it's difficult for me to say this, but she manages to out talk everyone too well for her to be an actual loser. She's just absolutely too intelligent to be there and an extremely uptight presence, but not really a dirtbag. She stole her only friend's boyfriend, which is toxic loser behavior, but then she managed to keep said friend and said boyfriend, before breaking up herself. She delivered a speech at the end of the show, and managed to be totally herself and reaffirm her own beliefs in front of her entire class. Her behavior was not a reaction to her surroundings it was who she was. Not a dirtbag).

People who ARE teenage dirtbags:

- Rodrick Heffley (thinks he's hot shit because he has a band, but his entire career came down to playing at the school talent show and his mom was the one who went viral. Also he canonically doesn't know how to spell. Iconic teenage dirtbag behavior).

- Janis Ian (manipulated her own friend to go after her enemy because her enemy destroyed her reputation in front of the whole school so much, she essentially got loserfied. She wears a tux to prom. Her only friend is an openly gay guy in 2004, who btw IS NOT a teenage dirtbag himself cause he's confident and he knows he's the shit).

- Sid from Skins (spends his entire time lusting over his best friend's girlfriend and, from what I remember, fucks her after his friend gets ran over by a bus or right before. Doesn't pull, only by accident and looking like that).

- Jane Lane from Daria (artist, loser, has a smart mouth, but not smart enough. Brother is a stoner who has a band that's gonna 'make it someday, man.' Entire family is a fucked up conglomerate of artists who are 'free thinkers'. Goes to school to see her best friend only. This best friend then fucks up her hair and steals her boyfriend, and she stays friends with her. Almost too cool to be a teenage dirtbag, but she has such an overwhelming vibe of it that looms over her that it makes it impossible for her to outlive it).

- Richie Tozier from It (smoker, trash mouth, constantly chased by bullies, doesn't pull, doesn't give, socially anxious, thinks his dick is bigger than yours (it is not)).

- Needy Lesnicki (I don't even need to explain why she's here, but here we go: Dated a drummer. Wore that to prom. Friends with the weirdo goth kids. Has a "punk rock" outfit to go to a bar. In love with her abusive best friend she can't quit. Constantly called a lesbian by the only girl who's weirder than her in her year).

- Juno MacDuff (talks like she's a constant stand up comedy routine. Pregnant from her best friend who's a bigger loser than her, and whom she loves dearly, at the age of 16. Into weird horror movies and comics. Knows how to play guitar. Threw up in her stepmother's urn and blamed her kid sister. Her only other best friend is a beautiful girl who's in love with her teacher and he is NOT hot. At all. So deprived she was almost sadly groomed. Sits on her car and contemplates the stars).

- Those two girls who are always hanging out in the bathroom in Drop Dead Gorgeous (look at them. Just look. One of them is pregnant and they are the only ones who have the guts to say that it's the popular girl and her mom who are murdering everyone because they know that no one gives a shit about what they have to say. Don't go to the school beauty pageant parade cause one of their waters broke. Still heavy smokers through it all).

Unclear:

- Colin Gray from Jennifer’s Body (Looks like that, but then he tried to pull the literal most beautiful girl in school now that she was socially irrelevant enough to go out with him and that still takes confidence. Also he looks like a MySpace wet dream in 2009, when looking like that was cool. Like I said, unclear).

- Kat Stratford (She is in between. She's a teenage dirtbag that knows she is one and embodies that with confidence, which by default makes her NOT a teenage dirtbag, you know? Difficult).

- Bill Denbrough (stutters, sure, but he also ends up with the only girl in their group, who's canonically chased by all the other loser boys. He's king of the losers, but if he lost the stutter, would he really still be a loser?)

That's it. Please stop sharing pictures of "teenagers" with vodka bottles and huge groups of friends, having fun. Those were the people you wanted to be in high school, therefore not teenage dirtbags. Being a teenage dirtbag is about pain and being a loser. Understand the essence. Thank you.

[eddieshellscape]

i just wanted to go on a fandom rant bc i'm tired and I love analyzing media.

So i've been a huge fan of x-men since like middle school and my otp in the fandom has and always will be scogan. It started off as me being like "oooh enemies to lovers they hate each other but they also kinda are into it" to like actually growing to appreciate the nuances of the characters and how they can bring out the best in each other. Like Scott is such a leader who feels like he needs the be the responsible one all the time. He's like that one person who always feels like they need to be stable all the time because if they aren't then they think everyone else will fall apart. There are many interpretations of the character, but that's how I view him. LOGAN on the other hand is like short little angry bastard man who likes pushing peoples buttons because he's afraid of getting attached to anyone bc he could hurt them or just outlive them since he's like freaking 100 something years old atp. He also has an insane healing factor so he's like practically immortal (i refuse to watch the logan movie bc i know he dies in it) so I like to headcannnon that he doesn't often take basic care of himself. Like he probably is like out in freezing temps and doesn't bundle up bc he won't get sick/die from it, but that doesn't mean he doesn't need to take care of himself.

And then together you get Logan who helps Scott loosen up and be less uptight and worried about being super perfect around him, because logan's never the type of guy you have to be super presentable around. And scott cares so much about everyone he helps logan remember to take care of himself and I just bet they find so much comfort in each other and like oererfhhhhhhh. Marvel let me make an x-men movie i will be so normal about it I swearrrr.

Also, in most of the x-men media i've watched/read, Jean has like no personality or like,,, isn't relevant to what I'm talking about, but i think a scott/logan/jean polycule could be cute if someone actually gave that girl a personality (i'm looking at you, movies)

wahoo rant over

[thatshadowcomic]

Hello, op. I absolutely love reading comics and your recent one, The Toll, is something I look forward to read! :D

If it's alright to ask, what are headcanons you like to share about Shadow and/or Sonic?

Thank you!!! The new page will be coming soon, gonna shoot for this weekend! I'll be lockin' in to get more stuff done this month >:)

I have HC from 2002 until now hahaha--Here's a few sonic/shadow specific things that might be interesting?

I combine details from the Archie comics and Sonic X and mix them with the main lore from the games btw.

-Sonic ghost writes/secretly produces a lot music in response to the things in his life. "Live and Learn" was his direct response to shadow's presumed death.

-Shadow and maria are like siblings in my AU, but his relationship with her and Gerald would shape what he expects from relationships in his life, in the same way your parental relationships would shape your expectations for men and women.

-On the ARK, the scientists grew very fond of shadow, often petting him or scratching his ears. Maria would often fluff up his fur, like you would a dog's cheeks. He now understands this kind of affection is more of a human-pet thing and it's kinda inappropriate as an adult... but he misses it.

-Sonic jokes that shadow is like a dog a lot, because he likes being pet and laying on sonic's stomach...and one other reason.

-Sonic isn't as aloof as he seems and he knows how to read the room, and shadow. He once heard that shadow liked Doritos, so he got him a value box of all the flavors and left it at his house without telling him and never mentioned it, so shadow isn't sure if it's even from him.

-Shadow and Omega are like brothers, with Omega often trying to out do or impress him. Sometimes Shadow gets too competitive and they fight, with topaz having to break them up...Rouge just laughs and watches the carnage.

Some deeper stuff:

-It's hard for sonic to truly hate someone or refuse to help them, which has become a big struggle with people around him...and himself. He is certainly a redemption-oriented person and gives people a choice to be his enemy each time they interact, rather than label them as such.

During the Doom situation, sonic wasn't afraid of being killed by shadow, rather, he was afraid of shadow doing something he didn't want to do.

-Sonic doesn't believe that life has purpose or reason, instead he thinks people should find their own meaning and value. "It doesnt matter". He lives in the moment and enjoys as much out of it as he can, because he knows he could die any day.

-Shadow is horrified by the idea of life being meaningless and struggles to see how sonic can have a fruitful life feeling this way. The concept fills shadow with dread and gives him an existential crisis...He struggles with the idea of possible immortality because it means anything he gains will one day vanish, just as before.

Sonic thinks shadow should live the same as him because he'll outlive it. He wonders if shadow should document everything as a way to appropriate it...

A big part of sonadow for me is how they learn that different people need different things. Shadow doesnt want freedom in the same way that sonic does..

[skinidilo]

With Wings

POV Gwayne Hightower

Word count: 550<

AN: This is a revision of my previous post. In the next chapter, Gwayne will meet a love interest, as well as learn what Larys is plotting to do with the prisoners.

Tags: First Person narrative, tension, plot

Ser Gwayne Hightower sticks out his neck in order to save the lives of the ratcatchers. In doing so he is unwittingly tied to the machinations of Lord Larys Strong, who has devised a most desperate use for them.

Chapter 1

Word came that one hundred of the Palace’s most miserable derelicts had been rounded up and shackled. King Aegon II wanted them hanged. The men in question: Visibly poor. Likely criminals. That is to say, the very aristocracy of Flea Bottom. They were the rat catchers, and they were all going to die. 

The son of King Aegon II was slain, and the ratcatchers, exactly who you’d most suspect, had a hand in that sin. The depravity occurred within the Keep’s own walls. I was still a few day's ride from the city, but that was what the peasants on the road said. 

“They’re gonna hang a hundred of ‘em!” they all cried in panic. 

“That would be unjust,” I assured them. That wasn’t the kind of justice dispensed in Oldtown. My sister, Alicent, would never raise a son capable of that. Even in his darkest hour.

I arrived far earlier than expected, having ridden hard upon hearing the gruesome plan. I sought the king out at the Red Keep. He was speaking with the loathsome Lord Larys’ Strong, perhaps more publicly than one should.

“My Lord,” I stepped forward and knelt.

“Uncle.” The king replied, not bothering to look at me. I quickly rose, snubbed. 

“I beseech you to spare the ratcatchers,” I said with little hope.

“What, you too?” The King looked annoyed. He looked to Larys, “Is he-?”. Larys slowly shook his head no.

“I and every reasonable citizen from here to Oldtown, too.” 

“Oh well, in that case, Uncle, please. I hadn’t realized you’d managed to find the reasonable fucking citizens, elusive that they are, and query them as to how I should rule my goddamn kingdom.” King Aegon glared at me now, his eyes were very red. “My son is dead, but I see who it is that has your sympathy. I’ll have Justice!”

“And we shall put those responsible to the sword,” I said, “Those responsible.” 

“I need to see those responsible hanging from the rampart,” Aegon said, “I need to see the crows pecking out their eyeballs. Now.”

“My lord,” Larys said, “We may still find some use for these souls. I will soon know the truth of what transpired, I need only a  little more time. Word travels qu-” 

“Oh, daft! Both of you!” Aegon exclaimed. “Their use is to catch rats, and they’ve outlived even that!” 

“Let me set them upon the enemies of the crown,” Larys said, “We know the assassin had but one accomplice. It’d be a waste to kill ninety-nine innocent men. Let me use them, my lord.” It struck me that this was not the first time Larys had proposed the idea to Aegon, who seemed altogether uninterested in anything other than a massacre. 

“And would you lead the ratcatchers into battle? Even the wall wouldn’t have that lot.” Aegon sneered at him. Larys shifted uncomfortably, but he did not speak on impulse. I watched him measure his words carefully. I needed to save these men and women from untoward justice, no matter what I felt for them personally. They were citizens of the crown, I couldn’t have them strung them up indiscriminately.

 I struggled to understand why Larys Strong was so invested in their wellbeing though, and so too struggled King Aegon, who looked at the man with a mix of frustration and curiosity. 

“No, my lord, I could not lead them.” Larys said eventually. “But,” he pointed a crooked finger toward me, “Ser Gwayne could.”

[splanana-bitz]

Apologies to my mutuals (or anyone else that cares) but I really need to disappear from the internet for a little bit, at least until post-election panic somewhat calms down.

I stressed myself out way too bad this past week or so, thanks to doom-scrolling, and will only worsen it if I stay online right now. But a few words of advice for my friends, mutuals, or anyone who needs to hear this (even if it's already been said):

We don't know for sure what will happen. Yes, I know it's scary to think about the possibility of Project 2025, but as far as I know, it feels, at the very least, mildly unrealistic, and I doubt that congress, senate, etc. would let half the shit on this project slide. We have ammendments and documents for a reason (to help prevent total control). We just have to trust that these people have half a brain to realize how unconstitutional Project 2025 is. Yet, am I fully certain it won't happen? No. If anything, there is still a likely chance it will. But all you can do is just hope and do NOT dig yourself into a hole of "what ifs" and doom scenarios. Be prepared and keep tabs, but please do NOT make your sadness and stress worse.

In the potential event that it does get implemented and push comes to shove; Retaliate. Fight back. Protest. Do whatever you can do to push back against it. Idk how effective this method is going to be this time around, but in the end, doing something is better than nothing. People before us had to do it, and we shouldn't be the generation that just gives up and lets it happen. You're allowed to be angry and sad, but please don't let it render you incapable. Be sad and angry WHILE fighting back. Don't ever, EVER give up.

Quit doom-scrolling. It's been said before, but if you are beyond belief stressed, please- Get off social media for a while. Take a walk. Pet your dog, cat, bird, etc., eat your comfort foods, watch your favorite media, indulge in your productive hobbies or other fixations that bring you joy.

Please don't let defeatism win. And I know it's hard right now, but please do NOT. GIVE. UP. There is still hope and if not for yourself, at least keep going for others and to see the end of whatever this presidency will bring (cos again, nothing for certain has been decided yet). Outlive whatever enemy it is we may deal within these next 4 years.

Trump cannot and should not be able to run again after his presidency is over in 2028, due to the 22nd ammendment. I know that feels like an incredibly long time away, but once these next 4 years are over, Trump shouldn't and can't have that power anymore. It is horrifying to think of what may come, but the hope is perhaps we can do damage control once he's out of office if he ends up fucking things up to that bad of a degree.

Idk...maybe this isn't helpful- Maybe Idk what I'm talking about, but I'd rather leave some of you with this than leave in a panic.

I wish everyone a good day/night - Take care of yourself - Don't give up and don't stress yourself out - Let's just hope for the best, do what we can, live for today, and 'fuck it, we ball.'

[mcflymemes]

YELLOWSTONE PROMPTS *  assorted dialogue from the television show

leverage is knowing if someone had all the money in the world, this is what they would buy.

i remember.

there's sharks and minnows in this world. if you don't know which you are, you aren't a shark.

that's it. that's all there is.

where's the fun in wrecking a single man?

words are weapons.

just like your mother.

"i'm sorry" are two words you never have to say to me.

we're enemies now.

i'm gonna give you one last chance. you leave now or you never leave.

you know what work is, don't you?

you can't unmake family.

i don't choose the way. i make sure no one questions yours.

you're either born a willow or born an oak. that's all there is to it.

i want you to move it.

our home is here.

well, that's what it means.

i need you to learn how to use them.

your grandfather used to say you can't fix a broken wagon wheel, but you can use the parts to make a new one.

it means that you have me, that i'm yours. it means come live your life with me.

soldiers don't tell war stories anymore, because wars these days... it's just about trying to live through them.

that's a conversation for another time that we'll never have.

you're gonna grow up and i'm gonna grow old.

if you act like a thief, i will treat you like one.

what do you want from me?

you are the trailer park. i'm the tornado.

no one has a right. you have to take a right, or stop it from being taken from you.

i look at every day with you as a gift.

you know, you did something that no one does. you've outlived your past.

i'm chopping your family tree down.

don't scream.

i'm asking you to marry me. will you do that?

nobody's gonna mess with us.

the only thing i ask is that you outlive me so i never live another day without you.

lawyers don't scare me.

i'm reasonable until i'm provoked.

everything i do is for him.

does that make sense?

you ought to listen to this.

i have been down this road many, many times before.

lawyers are the swords of this century.

karma comes in all shapes and sizes. guess it's me today.

god sure finds interesting ways to put people out of business.

you know what that means, don't you?

if it's gonna be all right, why are you taking a gun?

i hope i never meet the first man who thought it was a good idea to ride a bull.

i look at you, and the thought fades.

you know, when you boil life down, it's funny just how little you need, isn't it?

let's go get them.

i believe in loving with your whole soul and destroying anything that wants to kill what you love.

i made two bad decisions in my life based on fear, and they cost me everything.

like it or not, that choice is coming.

when you say no, it must be the death of the question.

i can't stop the river from flowing.

i don't want you to stop it.

when they go away, they never come back. ever.

you would have made a hell of a cowboy.

a man who puts a hand on a member of my family never puts a hand on anything else.

where'd you learn that kind of language?

do you think some day an explorer will find our bones and wonder what happened to us?

i don't know you.

the exploring's all done.

it's the truth.

just tell me who to fight.

all men are bad. but some of us try real hard to be good.

everything's gonna be all right.

these problems have to go away before i do.

for someone with no spine, you've sure got a lot of balls.

do you know who did it?

you never knew your grandmother, did you?

nice try, kid.

bullies need to be big, and i'm bigger than you.

every so often, you say something that makes me think you're smart.

you build something worth having, someone's gonna try to take it.

you ever had someone look at you, and your whole world just stops?

i like his home better.

i'm not judging. i just don't understand this place.

i'm just meaner than you.

from now on, what i do is for me.

when the misery is bad enough, tomorrow is rarely factored into decisions.

you should try zumba. get your cardio up.

"should" is a useless word, almost as useless as hope.

all the angels are gone. there's only devils left.

you've already proved you're not scared of anything.

if i'm going to lose you, it's going to be about what i did, not because i lied.

[fluffypotatey]

Hcs about shadowpeach pining (angrily and in denial) during their nemesis era?

hmmmm ngl i’m not that great at listing my headcanons 👉👈 i simply tend to just let them unfold in my writing but let’s say shadowpeach in their nemesis era….

Macky would take (and had taken) every mention of Wukong to complain and shit-talk on the guy. this is less of a headcanon and more of an observation, but keeping that in mind, i like to think that because of Macky’s knee-jerk reaction to always spew the most venomous and harsh comments pertaining to Wukong, it has allowed for Macky’s own memories of Wukong to be distorted and negatively biased. for example: the shadowplay™️ :)

it definitely holds truth to it and shows Macky’s side of the story…..however, it is such a skewed perspective and blantantly anti-Wukong propaganda, which goes to show how much Macky spends his time stewing in his bitterness and anger

anyway, add pining to that and you get a hot fucking mess lmao

we just established that Macky struggles with viewing his memories of his past with Wukong in a objective and unbiased way and has an unhealthy obsession with finding ways to test the guy’s golden character apart like a chronically online Twitter anti….ADD PINING TO THAT???? jfc Macky would be so fucking unbearable. worse than the most exaggerated tsunderes in the cheesiest shojo anime’s ever. he’d be insufferable.

an “obsessive demon”, some might say

Wukong on the other hand…..he’s a little busy with mentoring MK, mitigating his own existential crisis (part 2???? part 3????) about immortality and the fact that he’s lived longer than he expected and he outlived his friends but not his old enemies and—

his mind’s little preoccupied to really focus on the fact that his old flame not only wants to kill him and MK but also might be someone he still never moved on from. also there’s no Tripitaka or Zhu Baije or Ao Lie to call him out on it (MK and Pigsy are the closest who could but Pigsy’s a little busy being suspicious and critical of Wukong’s mentoring methods with MK and MK is a little busy protecting the city & learning new moves & ignoring all his problems to call Wukong out with this particular issue)

though, could we really call it pining if Wukong just finds enjoyment in teasing his old friend now turned enemy from time to time? so what if Wukong enjoys ruling up Macky whenever he comes on to the scene in the name of LBD??? it’s just some harmless flirting teasing! it’s not like Wukong enjoys seeing Mac get all flustered or enjoys having someone to fight against that’s actually a challenge and for fun (not like fun fun, obvi, bc MK and the team are on a mission that Macky cannot find out about but 👀)

teasing Macky helps with Wukong’s boredom. that’s all. nothing else that needs to be examined further. yes 👍