#i need to fix. plot holes in this au

[transfemlogan]

In my swapped au my self insert id called Mateo Undead w/ the nickname revenge/revy but how awesome would it b if xyr name was Revenge Undead. I sound like a scene music star /silly

[spacedustmantis]

re did the roster for witnesses a little bit. i added etho (bc i've been watching his videos more and he's silly) and scar (at the request of my darling beloved), and bc it was getting a little crowded in here, and i've already borrowed so much from mechs canon, i made first zed and then later impulse and tango yeet themselves into the void. i also, due to this change, reassigned some instruments and stuff.

so here you go, the (probably) final lineup for the hermits in my witnesses au in order of getting mechanized:

Grian, mechanism: eyes; instruments: bass guitar, vocals; position: gunner

Mumbo Jumbo, mechanism: all of him; instruments: banjo, glockenspiel, vocals; position: mascot/grian's best friend

(ex-member) Zedaph, mechanism: right arm; instrument: keyboard; position: medic (leaves just before cleo joins)

Rendog, mechanism: vocal chords/throat; instruments: lead vocals, backing guitar; position: captain

(ex-member) ImpulseSV, mechanism: brain; instruments: percussion, vocals; position: engineer (leaves with tango a few millennia after cleo joins)

Xisuma, not a mechanism, but the ship. built by impulse

(ex-member) TangoTek, mechanism: redstone blood; instruments: mandolin, accordion; position: science officer (leaves with impulse a few millennia after cleo joins)

GoodTimesWithScar, mechanism: lungs; instruments: keyboard, percussion, vocals; position: he claims to be a lot of things, no one really knows what he does

ZombieCleo, mechanism: patches of skin; instruments: 1st violin, flute, vocals; position: quartermaster

FalseSymmetry, mechanism: legs; instruments: trumpet, saxophone, accordion, vocals; position: archivist

Joel Smallishbeans (mechanized at the same time as etho), mechanism: heart; instruments: lead guitar, mandolin, vocals; position: pilot

EthosLab (mechanized at the same time as joel), mechanism: heart; instruments: percussion, 2nd violin, nyckelharpa; position: engineer

[steelycunt]

pls just write r/s doing nothing whenever you feel like it bc those are the best fics and you write them pining like no one else anyways i'll be your number one fan if no one will and tell you how incredible these two going for a nap on the sofa after watching tv was in a fic of yours

see pining and napping on the sofa after watching tv is exactly the sort of thing i want to write!! that is so much more fun to me than having to craft a plot!! i have a scrapyard word doc with about 20k words in it of just little snippets of them doing that sort of thing that ive written and have no use/context for...but i worry that if i keep writing that sort of thing i end up essentially repeating the same story every time, which makes it hard to justify the existence of new wips because i feel like im trying to come up with a new premise for the same story. even though frankly that story is all i want to write. anyway those are my fears but all this to say that them doing nothing is sooo important to me personally its practically all i know how to write so if i DO sort myself out enough to write anything. it'll probably be a bit of that. again >:-/

[darkpoisonouslove]

Any headcanons about Darcy and her aunty Fara?

Anon, I promise y'all are overestimating my ability to keep my mouth shut where my ideas are concerned. That is to say, if I had any, I would have posted them already.

[pr0cyon-lotor]

AU where instead of Shen Yuan being obsessed with Luo Binghe, he's instead obsessed with the scum villain himself. I mean we all know Bingge is Very Not Good Person™ but you know who else a Very Not Good Person™? Say it with me: Shen Jiu

Like just imagine a timeline where Shen Yuan is writing paragraph after paragraph about how Shen Qingqiu might actually be a good person but Airplane is wasting his potential. The other commenters are saying he's delusional because he abused the protagonist and as all these TERRIBLE allegations towards him. So he's a clear cut villain.

But Shen Yuan is defending his fav with the vigor of a devout worshipper. He's constantly siting parts that are obvious plot holes and how they could give much needed context to Shen Qingqiu's character.

Other people are demanding for worst things to happen to Shen Qingqiu to spite him. Airplane caves. Shen Yuan actively commissions art and fics where Shen Qingqiu is happy. People tell him "Shen Qingqiu won't fuck you bro"

Shen Yuan isn't interested in that. He's a freaky little man with freaky little likes. He'd gladly take Shen Qingqiu's cold glares and even volunteer to have tea poured on him.

When he finishes PIDW, he's been outraged that Shen Qingqiu was killed off a while back. He's even more outraged that Shen Qingqiu wasn't given any mention at the end.

Now, imagine with me that he gets transmigrated into some NPC, literally Unimportant Character No°5. Probably as the head disciple for drama reasons. And as soon as Shen Jiu is brought in, scruffy and hissing as he is. He immediately hugging his thighs and saying he'll be peak lord for sure.

Please follow me into this suspicious alleyway as I continue to explain my vision fueled by sleep deprivation.

So now imagine your Shen Jiu. You're a former street rat and demonic cultivator, you aren't expecting to be liked or respected. You're expecting it, you've come to terms with it a long time ago. What you weren't expecting was for this random ass guy you have to call da-shixiong is immediately insane about you.

He met you first day, literally saw you bite a guy, and immediately started spouting out how you'll be the next peak lord and the absolute envy of Cang Qiong Mountain. You conclude he's missing a few screws because he said it in the most disgustingly sincere way.

You try to continue on with your life, trying to beat him and he looks almost... Excited about you beating him. So he's an M, you think to yourself. But then you see someone trying to beat him or you on something, and this guy immediately gets aggressive. Okay so he's just weird with you.

You continue to deal with him. He's weird but also weirdly respectful. He leaves if you tell him to leave. He defends you like it's his very birth right. He's always there to tend to you as if you were a god. He doesn't touch you and only sits around like a dog waiting for a command.

You eventually get strong enough to beat him, and this absolute buffoon is over the moon about it, already spouting about your supposed success again.

When you actually become peak lord, it isn't surprising. Your hype man has been saying it since day one, he was expecting it for some reason. He continues to spout out nonsense about how he just knew you were going to do it.

So what now? You obviously desire him carnally. What is the next step?

Okay so I know this wouldn't fix them. Almost without question this would make they both worse. But, hear me out, it would be funny. (Especially since just know Shen Yuan's entire inner monologue would be him saying he's just being a good friend as if he isn't being the gayest man in the sect and Shang Qinghua is there. That's an accomplishment to outgay the author)

[factual-fantasy]

I remember part of the reason why I dropped off my Mario AU a bit was because I didn't really have a satisfying explanation/lore for the princesses..

Why is Peach the queen of the mushroom kingdom if she isn't a Toad? Why is Daisy the princess/queen of the Delfino's if she's not a Delfino? How does Rosalina fit into all this? No matter how hard I tried, I just had a bit of writers block and couldn't come up with anything I liked..

But lately I've been thinking about my Mario AU.. a lot. And after some brain storming.. I believe I'm onto something. I've been thinking about the prophecy, the super stars, 1-up mushrooms.. and I think I'm on my way to building some proper lore and fixing a lot of the plot holes my AU had. Starting with the princess' and their designs.

My version of Peach, Daisy and Rosalina(sort of) are the same species as Wario and Waluigi. So I gave them the make over they should have had from the start. Pointy ears, pink/purple noses, blue markings under the eyes and those classic black ring eyes that the Wario "bros" both have.

With the lore I'm working on, I gave Peach a new dress, color scheme and hairstyle. For Daisy I changed up her whole outfit, her crown, her hairstyle.. I also drew a bizarre mark on her shoulder/face.. hmm..

With some updates to Wario and Waluigi's story, I gave them the bruises and wounds they unfortunately should have..

Rosalina's design was the hardest to execute, and took the longest to color.. but I think I finally got the look I was after and might not need to redesign her again. I hope ya'll can tell what I was going for- <XD

Anyways, I would love to ramble about their stories sometime. But for now everything is still under development. And some of these designs are not final. I'm bound to go over Daisy and Peach a few more times until they look juuuust right. Until then, I hope ya'll like my artwork! :}}

[mockingkatniss]

NEED A RIDE? - drug dealer!Coriolanus Snow

18+ | nswf | mdni

warnings and tags: swearing, mention of drug dealing, smut, sloppy making out, multiple orgasms, blowjob, mention of gagging, body fluids, use of words like “wh0re” or “slu7”, specific body descriptions. BUZZCUT CORYO (little bit of a jump-scare for some of y’all) MODERN!AU, p in v sex, reader is just soft but not innocent, intese sex, porn without plot. (If I missed anything lmk).

(not proof read because I was tired, I will fix eventual errors <3)

summary: one particularly hot summer evening coryo sees you riding your bike while he’s driving he’s car around mindlessly and he ask you if you need a ride.

words count: 3.109k

Wanted to thank so so much @swiftiekisses because the drug dealer!coryo au it’s hers but she inspired me a lot and I also love so much her writing that I wanted to contribute with this fic! Also a big thanks to @euphemiaamillais because I’m literally addicted to what she writes and for inspirations for the drug dealer! au too! <3

enjoy and support me with a comment or a tiny heart! 💗🎀

coriolanus was driving by the quiet and deserted road of his god forsaken forgotten little town.

he hoped almost every morning to just wake up and found his rotten little city was torn down by some natural catastrophe.

he thought that dreams or ambitions couldn’t come true here. since his family lost everything due to his father's poor life choices, he was now stuck with poverty at 18 years and a cousin and grandmother to look after. more correctly just grandmother, since tigris left for college just the year prior.

to round some money he worked at the gas station, a literal hell hole in summer and plus coryo was sure he left part of his soul here, and sold some drugs to younger kids or kids his age at school or at parties but most of the times they directly came to the gas station.

if a drug had a name it was mostly probable that coryo had it to sell

that summer was cruel, sweat sticking to clothes and the asphalt so hot it could melt shoe soles, so cruel that coryo decided just two days ago to buzz his beautiful platinum curls off. the super short hair gave him a totally new appearance, he noticed that at the last party he went to sell, that mostly girls bought from him, stucking dollar bills inside his front jeans pocket and sometimes begging for a kiss or some good old make out. he accomplished and accepted that he was just extremely hot.

his car moaned underneath him as he drove, that old piece of garbage was still going on but coryo feared that someday he would be left walking.

it was 7:35 pm, his shift at the gas station over since sejanus plinth took his place for the night shift. sejanus was a nice kid, he was rich but decided to take another path just having shitty jobs during the summer like most teens even though for him it wasn't necessary having one. he didn’t sell drugs but he covered coryo so many times at school or at work so he was ok.

coryo had a small joint hanging from his lips as he drove, just one hand on the steering wheel and both the car’s windows opened since his ac was (obviously) broken, but even the air was heavy and warm that night.

miraculously the bluetooth radio was still working so he was listening to some trap rap music on his cracked up phone, the screen broken from everytime he made it fall while running away from cops or simply on the floor on a daily basis. as the music went on he thought about how the suggestion to listen to that genre of music came from clemensia e arachne at school, but it was nice for once not only listening to metal or punk rock.

while he took another hit from his joint something caught his eye on the road. it was a bike, someone was riding it and he probably knew who it could be.

the bike was faded pink with old stickers on it and you were riding it tiredly, legs sore and sweat sticking to your skin.

your tiny tight skirt was riding up a little showing some more of your thighs and coryo swore to god that he saw a glimpse of your pink panties.

sometimes you bought from him some weed and nothing more. you were a literal sunshine and at school you talked to everyone, being friendly and helpful. coryo still remembers how you helped him with physics the first year of highschool. you both were still young but nature obviously blessed you donating you such a sexy body.

he instantly felt his cock gently twitch into his jeans and he made the smoke from the joint exiting his nostrils in annoyance. don’t you get coryo wrong, he had sex and sure plenty of it but since the hot sticky summer he wasn’t feeling like it to just screw some girl even though he just needed to say the words. it was peculiar how his cock woke up just by seeing you.

he drove nearby you slowly to keep up with your velocity and you looked over to acknowledge the presence of a car and as you recognized the driver you smiled throughout puffed breaths from hotness and the riding.

coryo made a small smirk while pulling the joint away from his lips to talk. “hey bunny, need a ride?”. you slowly stopped your bike, tippy toes of your pink vans scratching on the asphalt. coryo stopped the car too and since the streets were dead he just got off his vehicle to look at you while positioning the almost finished joint on the car roof.

you panted lightly as you talked as you examined his presence. “it would be so nice coryo, I think I’m about to faint because of the heat”. he nodded understandingly with his head to the car behind him. “get on, I’ll get the bike” coryo thought he was going crazy when you got off the bike seat revealing more of your thighs. you collected your backpack and lifted yourself up on your tippy toes to kiss his cheek, strawberry lip gloss scent evident on his skin too now. “thank you coryo you’re my savior” you said before going to the opposite back of the car.

once the bike was fixed in the back he turned the car back on, securing his joint back around his lips once again while grabbing his lighter inside his jeans front pocket.

“where am I taking you?” he asked while lighting the joint to take a long drag before passing it to you. “I’m going to my dads house, it’s near the football field, 32nd house” you explained as coryo nodded knowing where it was since he spent much more time driving around in his free time than anything else. you also accepted the joint starting to smoke with relaxed muscles.

coryo looked over at you while driving, there was a peaceful silence. his elbow leaned outside the car’s window as his slim fingers tapped the steering wheel gently while driving. you noticed his rings decorating his fingers and his new buzz cut hair made his features even more sharp. you took three puffs from the joint handing him it back while caressing your naked thighs trying to pull down the miniskirt.

coryo savored till the last minute your lucid lips around the filter that he made, somehow the sweat made your skin warm and inviting, the blonde felt his cock twitch again and he fixed himself on the seat while trusting with his hips forward. he coughed a bit taking the last puff while tossing the dead joint outside the car. “how's it going in general?” you asked softly feeling already your head light but not too much, it was pleasant. “mh it’s ok, it’s too hot to work or to do anything else, I just want winter back” coryo explained briefly, voice slightly rough from smoking. you chuckled while leaning over to him to pinch his cheek softly. “awww snow wants his snow back doesn’t he?” coryo smiled while looking over to her, instinctively he turned over his face to scratch your fingers with his teeth playfully as you kept messing with him. “by the way, you look good today, bunny, but riding that bike with just this tiny skirt? a little bit dangerous don’t you think?” he asked while gripping the steering wheel with both hands. “how is it dangerous? riding my bike won’t stop me” you felt like wanting to touch him so much, so you placed your hand on his thigh. coryo was one of the hottest boys at school and his reputation made him even hotter and you were a total slut for bad boys.

at your gesture he stiffened a bit looking down at you delicately manicured hand and you kept caressing him going higher and higher but stopping just before his crotch. “can’t keep your hands to yourself now?” he tried to be ironic but just your presence had made him incredibly hard and it was difficult to not stop the car and fuck you in the back seats, your pretty head pressed into the plush of the seats. “maybe I don’t want to keep them to myself” you shrugged while pulling away your hand as he stopped the car in front of your dads house.

he exited the car while trying to hide his hard on while pulling his jeans around to crotch to fix the situation but nothing was effective. coryo pulled your bike outside the back of his car and you thanked him again while kissing his cheek but making the kiss longer. he sighed with a smirk while placing his big warm hand on your hips. you caressed his chest while looking up at him, a small pout on your lips. “you’re busy?” you asked, your long lashes batting at him inviting. “mmh no bunny, i’ll probably just go home, smoke again and collapse on my bed” his thumbs caressed your exposed skin just a little bit above your skirt. “why don’t you come inside? my dads busy he won’t be home till tomorrow noon” you swayed your hips a bit with pleading eyes. “fuck bunny you’re truly tempting but-“ you interrupted him while taking his hand, pulling him towards the house. coryo gave in, closing the car with his keys by distance and following you inside. you were making him feral with your temptations and soft eyes.

thank god the house had an ac so it was cooler inside. you tossed your shoes away together with your backpack and went to the kitchen to collect some water for you both and coryo looked around noticing how the house was elegant and well kept.

he slipped off his beaten up black combat boots and just sat on the big couch. he almost sunk inside it, noticing it was a water couch and smirked as dirty thoughts filled his head.

“the water couch is amazing isn’t it?” you giggled while handing him a glass of water while bouncing next to him making the couch move in small waves. “yeah pretty comfortable” he said as he leaned the glass to his lips not looking away from you for any second.

you then smiled mischievously while slipping down the couch, your knees sinking in the soft fluffy carpet. you positioned yourself between his legs while going for the zipper of his pants pulling it down with pure eyes. coryo almost choked on his water as he looked at you with pleased eyes and a big smirk on his lips. “what the fuck are you doing bunny?” he breathed out a laugh as you tried to pull down his pants together with his boxers. “I want to suck you off so bad so lift up your butt now” your tone was playful and demanding and he did as you said making you able to pull his jeans and boxers down making his pink cock sprung to life. it leaned against his tummy perfectly. “what did I do to deserve something like this without even asking?” he placed his hands behind his head pushing his hips up so he could sink more into the water couch. “nothing special but you’re fucking hot and I can’t wait anymore,” you paused to spit on his tip gently while pushing some curls behind your ears. “and I just know you’re good at selling as you’re good at fucking” you giggled while finally gripping his base. “I knew you were big, shit” you were already fantasizing about taking him deep and hard inside your cunt. “you knew?” coryo laughed again but his breath was getting ragged slightly.

you just didn’t respond, kitten licking his tip and collecting precum as you looked up at him. he bit his bottom lip harshly to just concentrate not to burst his cum all over your pretty glittery makeup and long lashes.

you kissed his length till the base then licking a long stripe back up till you swallowed half his cock allowing space with your tongue and cheek. you started to suck and lick and the moans he was making were pornographic.

after a while saliva was dripping down your chin mostly when you decided to deepthroat him with a fluid movement making the water couch sway gently. “ah fuck bunny, you’re so fucking good” coryo moaned, lust clouding his blue eyes as he gripped your curls to buck into your throat just two times just to hear you gag shamelessly around his cock.

you smiled through teary lashes and bubbles of saliva and lifted your head to just suck at his tip harshly.

“shit- I’m gonna come bunny” coryo announced as you jerked off the rest of his cock while concentrating on the tip. at his words you pulled away standing up and his angry cock just leaned against his tummy as he bucked into air. “are you completely mad you fucking slut?” he said impulsively, the ruined orgasm hitting something into his mind profoundly.

you just smirked while slipping off your crop top and miniskirt. “what did you just call me coryo?” you asked while undoing your bra and slipping off your soaked pink panties. his mouth was slightly agape at your naked body, eyes obsessed. “I said you’re a whore, a slut” he said slowly and challengingly, lips mimicking each final letter. “oh yeah? let this slut show you how much of a whore she is.” you walked on the couch standing above him both of your feet planted on each side of his legs making the water couch giggle.

he was completely transfixed as you opened your legs leaning one of your knees on the headset of the couch. you grabbed his head from behind pushing his mouth on your dripping core.

coryo thought about cumming just from that, just from the smell of your juices and the taste of it.

it was so intense, his tongue lapping at your folds once in a while stopping to suck on your lips or clit while humming. his big hands gripped your ass squishing the plush meat here to push his face further into you.

you were a complete mess as you scratched his head and moaned shamelessly and loudly, hips bucking as you trusted him keeping you up to not let you fall.

“fuck coryo! fuck I’m coming!” you chanted as you gripped his head, legs quivering as your juices splashed into his face. coryo felt on cloud nine as he gripped your hips to not let you fall as he lapped at your juice like the starving dog he was. dying by suffocation from your pussy seemed the only best thing he could think of at the moment.

you came down from your high slipping down as you sat on his lap, grabbing his neck to kiss him sloppily to taste yourself in his mouth. you sucked his tongue, licked the roof of his mouth and even licked his teeth while he playfully rubbed your clit. “mh! I’m sensitive-“ you lamented while pushing his hand away, your lips glistening with his saliva. “I need you inside now coryo” you gently kissed his jawline and neck while rubbing your pussy onto his still angry cock. “your wish is my demand bunny but you’re not gonna come again sooner or later” as he said so with his low voice he pushed his cock inside of your thigh pussy helping himself with his fingers and you laughed a moan while arching and sitting fully on his hard member. he immediately hit your cervix so good you felt helpless.

it was the most passionate and sloppiest sex of your entire life. you rode him like your entire existence depended on it, you knees sunk into the water couch as you bounced on his cock helped by the gentle waves. his hands were placed right on top of your ribs as your hips were too quick to control anyways. you pushed your head so hard against his that your noses squished together as your forehead and your moans and shouts tangled together. both mouths opened, eyebrows furrowed.

coryo didn’t even remember his name anymore when you clenched hard around him signaling somehow that you were close. “stupid bunny thought she could come yeah?” he murmured around a moan as he gripped hard your ass to stop your intense riding. “what the fuck coryo? don’t stop please, fuck!” you lamented but when he pushed your back into the couch your eyes rolled in the back of your skull. coryo fucked into you helplessly, his orgasm close. your back arched and he massaged your breasts cupping them harshly. “shit fuck! I’m coming” he moaned, eyes fluttering close for a minute. to make you pay he pulled out, cum splashing on your tummy and even on your breasts from the intensity of it and you cried out loud from the loss of his cock inside of you. you even laughed a bit through cries because of where his cum landed but then you gripped his ear angrily. “make me come coryo, make me fucking come” she arched rubbing her pussy against his worked out cock. coryo panted a laugh and gripped your jaw with his hand tightly before leaning over to bit and pull your lower lip. he massaged your clit with all of his hand opened while looking at you. “look at your fucked out face, you’re completely drunk on my cock” he laughed again mischievously just to degrade you. he rubbed your entire pussy quickly, slapping your clit once in a while. “now you’re gonna come and admit that only my cock can make you this fucked up mh?” you nodded, eyes rolling once in a while. “yes, yes coryo, only you, only want your cock” he chuckled again while his hand kept going. “that’s what I wanted to hear bunny” at his last words you came, the orgasm making your entire skeleton tremble in pure bliss. you cried his name with your mouth wide open.

when you calmed down a bit he was just caressing your thighs while admiring your body painted with his cum and you smiled while stretching out a bit. “next time you’re gonna come inside coryo” you said it so naturally with a small smile and a yawn and coryo playfully slapped your sensitive clit with two fingers making you whine a bit. “I'm looking forward to the next time in like, 10 minutes, bunny.”

[alchely]

My Top Gallavich fics

So, under the advice of the lovely @iangallagherisadeadman I've decided to compile a favorites Gallavich fic list along with a brief rec of each, this won't be a strict top 10 cause I'm not gonna torture myself into excluding some of these stories on some made-up self imposed arbitrary rules.

A bunch of disclaimers: most of these fics are long fics, going from 30k words up, I'm not purposefully excluding shorter fics, I have read plenty of them, but they do have a harder time sticking in my head months after reading.

Most of these fics will be explicit, just read the tags on the fic itself if you want to find out more.

Some of these fics don't have links because the authors chose to lock them and as such make them unlinkable, in order to read them you will need to go through the author's page while you're logged in your AO3 account.

This ended up ballooning out of control and is A LOT longer than ten fics, I apologize in advance :p.

YOU'LL NEVER SEE US AGAIN – spoonfulstar - 231k words

Mickey and Ian have been students at Marceline boarding school their whole lives, as their time at the institute draws toward the end they will start to discover many things, about themselves, about each other and about the world they live in.

THIS FIC! I CRIED! The number of fanfiction that are able to make me cry can be counted on a singular hand, the emotional stakes get higher and higher as the story goes on, leading to a beautiful and bittersweet climax.

This story will make you think and feel deeply about topics you'd never think a shameless fic would delve into.

I am obsessed with Mickey in this fic, he and Ian grow up in an environment that could not be more removed from South Side Chicago and yet his personality is still so recognizably and distinctly Mickey.

The story goes very dark at times, and the fic itself could be considered lengthy, but I assure you the author has made sure to not make you feel it. Those 200k words flowed so well the story did not feel long at all.

HELP ME (TEAR DOWN MY REASON) – wehangout - 34k words

Mickey is a detective and Ian becomes a suspect in an investigation except Mickey already knows him because he's his favorite dancer.

This fic falls under the umbrella of fics where “Mickey is so in love with Ian he does something unbelievably crazy”.

Oooh boy, this fic, it's written in second person (yes you've read that right), tbh out of all fics I've read from this author I think this one was the easiest to adjust mentally to the change in perspective.

I loved Mickey’s “love” in this, just… This raw connection to Ian, the perfect cocktail of feelings, I could read that all day long.

IN ANOTHER WORLD – Roryonic - 249k words

Mickey does not get sent to prison at the end of S5, what happens after and how his presence influences future events (mostly Ian, but also every other Gallagher as well as his own family).

As far as I'm concerned this fic is the closest to a perfect S6 and beyond fix-it. The dialogue writing in this story is so close to canon Shameless that I could picture entire scenes in my head with the actors playing the characters, with their body and personality quirks.

Sometimes I find myself describing this fic like it's the actual show's deleted scenes, “Look, Mickey has his own storyline! And Mandy is here! And the existence of Yevgeni does not become a plot hole!”

There are some Mickey lines in this fic that to me are as canon as if they'd been in the show. Absolutely iconic writing.

I love this author so here's a rec of some of their other longfics, however I highly suggest a lot of their other much shorter stuff as well:

BATTLESHIPS AND LOVE BOATS: Ian and Mickey start their “no strings attached” kind of sex relationship a little later than canon but their attraction and love is just as strong. This is a sort of High School AU that turns into a Prison AU that turns into something else and every shift is just as lovely as the next.

YOU SMELL LIKE LOVE: Ian and Mickey are childhood friends, to the point that the rest of the Gallaghers might as well consider Mickey a seventh brother, mmmh, I sure wonder how things will start to change. Look, I never thought I'd love a childhood friends AU for Gallavich yet here I am, if it's good it's good.

ME AND THE DEVIL: Mickey unconsciously calls for a vengeance demon and Ian Gallagher shows up at his door, because Mickey is a stubborn dumbass they fall in love instead. This story has a lot of twists and turns and the premise is only the very beginning of the story. I LOVED it!

THE INCREASINGLY POOR DECISIONS OF IAN GALLAGHER – Shamelessquestions - 309k words

Ian is a dancer in a club, he accidentally gets involved in the affair of a dangerous mafia don, but the true danger is the attraction he and the mafioso’s right hand Mickey feel for each other as soon as they meet.

What. A. Classic. Truly, an unforgettable story, and I don't mean this in hyperbole, I read this story around… 2016/2017 during my second round in the Shameless fandom, then I read countless other fics in a lot of other fandom and yet this story was the only one that my mind retained from back then, to the point that I could still remember some of the finer details as well as the final plot twists when I came back to reread it.

The plot is constructed beautifully and the original characters (part of the Shamelessquestions fanfiction universe, as they come back time and time again in every one of their AU to fulfill their role in the story) are just as vibrant.

What a story, truly.

Favorite original character in this AU: Sal, his downfall is so satisfying and yet so pitiful to read.

TEENAGERS SCARE THE LIVING SHIT OUT OF ME – Mellow_Yellow - 221k words

Ian finds something scary and calls Mickey for help, even though they had only reconnected that very day after two years of not seeing each other. Together, they get sucked into a situation they weren't at all prepared for. Can they even admit that they're in over their head?

The very beginning of this fic is SO cinematic it grabbed my interest from the very first scene and didn't let go until the end, DO NOT search for spoilers.

The only warning I'll give is that it does deal with a bit of gore and what I'm personally gonna define as slight psychological horror. That's it. Enjoy!

BROKE STRAIGHT BOYS – dancermk - 66k words

Mickey becomes a porn actor for a site where he has to pretend he's straight and not enjoying the copious amount of gay sex he's having on camera, enter Ian, another actor under the same agency and their off the chart physical chemistry.

This story has, needless to say, some really, really good smut. I especially loved their first time together, but every sex scene in this story is seared in my mind.

ETHERIZED AGAINST THE SKY – Snarfle - 213k words

So, I debated whether I should add this fic or not, but I think if there is one fic that will stay in my mind long after this Shameless binge of the past couple of months it's this one, and it should absolutely become one of those fic that everyone in the fandom should read.

After Mickey gets shot by Kash his life takes a completely different direction and he ends up in a group home where, through many difficult times, he turns his life around.

So many iconic moments in this fic, some funny as fuck, some sad, some so absurd that I'm surprised they weren't lifted straight from Shameless, one so gruesome in the very first chapter that I was surprised to have such a visceral feeling from just words on a screen. Yeah, this story will stay with me for a long time.

OLD RULES FOR NEW SIDE PIECES – Shamelessquestions - 217k words

Ian is a Fed and he spots Mickey looking suspicious in an art museum, the mutual attraction is overwhelming, Mickey is not what he seems and Ian is already with someone else, but that's not gonna stop him from pursuing what he and Mickey have.

Putting it as bluntly as I can, this fic made me face the realization that I love cheating fics (if the cheating happens to someone else to bring together the endgame couple). I have already reread this fic twice and I could probably go for another one and not get tired of it, it's that good, and out of all this author's fics it's probably my favorite.

Favorite original characters in this AU: It's a three way tie between Dre, Ivan and Carrie, they're all very captivating in this story.

Other fic from this author I'd recommend cause I really love their style:

LOST IN TRANSLATION: Ian meets a very attractive man while he's in Ukraine who doesn't speak English, a mere language barrier won't stop him from flirting for hours. (adorable)

YOU MAKE ME FEEL HUMAN – Dragona - 66k words

Ian is an assassin, he meets Mickey and thus begins a very sick love story.

To say I'm obsessed with this fic is an understatement, I suggest to everyone to just go read the original author’s own description of the fic, it sets the tone of the story magnificently.

This is an Ian Gallagher that almost resembles Jerome (also played by Cameron in Gotham) but like… a slightly more subdued and saner S1/S2 version of him. I love the layers that get peeled right in front of my eyes, the madness that creeps in a bit more every chapter. I LOVE this story.

DRIED INK - 87k words

This fic combines my two favorite Gallavich-specific tropes, one being ‘Mickey comes back from prison after s6, Ian is with someone else’ and ‘Ian cheats on that someone else for Mickey’

I love the Gallaghers in this and how unsurprised they are at Ian going back to Mickey right away. It's a little jewel of a fic.

Mickey tries SO hard to stop himself and Ian in this but their love is too magnetic, they're irresistible to each other.

THE QUESTION OF NORMAL – blue_newman - 92k words

Ian is a prison counselor, Mickey is in prison, they fall in love and it's beautiful and Ian is incredibly devoted to Mickey in this fic and I fell in love with them both in this.

KINDA RAW – catgrassplantdad - 6k

Quite simply this is my favorite short pwp fic.

Illustrating those “five times” in one night that Mickey references in 11x01.

This fic is so hot, I love it <3

QUATERVOIS – DodgerBear - 51k words

Soldier Mickey gets stationed in the middle of nowhere and meets a farmer called Ian who makes him question everything.

Falling under the same umbrella of “Mickey does something crazy for Ian” fics and this is why it stuck in my mind even if it's been a while since I've read it.

I LOVE this story, their dialogues and everything that happens in it. The setting is lovely and you will fall in love with the description of Ian’s farm.

Other fic by the same author that I also loved:

BURDEN OF PROOF: Cop Mickey gets caught in a legal battle between the two oldest Gallagher brothers, something doesn't feel right though…

THE WORDS HE DOESN'T SAY: Mickey is released before Ian in s10 and has to meet a court-mandated therapist. The story is from the therapist POV and goes AU from the beginning of s10 in that Mickey gets involved back into Yev and Svetlana’s life, the dialogue is, quite obviously, the main attraction of the story and it's really well done. (Also, written in first person).

THE MENAGERIE – CrossMyDNA - 147k words

Ian decides to re-explore his bdsm preferences at The Menagerie where he meets sub extraordinaire Mickey on his very first visit.

Shameless is undoubtedly the fandom that opened my eyes to what bdsm could be back in… approx 2016? When that other popular bdsm fic was still around *ahem*.

So it definitely feels like a sign that coming back into the fandom this fic now exists and is SO GOOD.

Obviously it's very explicit, the smut in this fic is one of the best I've ever read.

The chemistry between Ian and Mickey sizzles off the screen and can absolutely be felt even in moments not of the nsfw variety, absolutely recommended!

MICKEY MILKOVICH’S GUIDE TO FLIRTING – whatwouldmickeydo - 40k words

An s2 “missing moments” between Gallavich, completely canon compliant, all under the pretense that Mickey is following a step by step guide to flirting.

I wish this fic was describing canon moments, not kidding a single bit, I wish I could somehow magically manifest these scenes into existence they're that good and fit that well into canon.

M8TE – gallawitch - 53k words

Omegaverse fic where Ian and Mickey both start using an app and end up matching with each other, even though a connection is made almost instinctively, coming to terms with it with a sound mind will take a bit longer…

Hey,had to have at least one of these on here lol

I love omegaverse and this was everything I wanted from it, couldn't have asked for anything better really <3.

SHACKLED – MyRelapse - 19k words

Ian has a change of heart and he decides that Mickey IS the one he wants, even if he's still in prison, so he keeps in contact and goes through every hoop imaginable to have him back as soon as possible.

Reading this made me so happy like I could burst, love it.

WAITING ON MY OWN TOO LONG – Ride4812 - 266k words

This rec more than any other on this list is what I'm gonna consider self indulgent because it covers the trope I always craved to read in such a satisfying way: Canon AU where Mickey comes back from prison after 8 years, Ian has found someone else but the moment the two meet again they fall back into each other right away.

The series is made up of 4 smaller fics:

One more night

Something more this time

No more lonely nights

Ain't this life so sweet

(I will point out here and nowhere else that the last installment of this series has some segment that probably needed to be re-read a couple more times, but by that point I was too invested, and the quality fluctuates a lot only in certain parts)

The writing style is very direct and to the point, which I love, the smut is very present and written beautifully and most importantly never boring.

Ian is a MESS in this fic and had me Stressed™, mostly cause for some reason I can't handle too much casual depiction of drug abuse and addiction (I know, ironic considering the fandom).

Conflicts and resolutions are never clean cut, they don't necessarily resolve quickly or definitely or the way you probably imagine they should and I find this level of realism very satisfying.

Taking a bit of space here at the end to also rec a couple other Ride4812 fics that I also loved:

COUP DE FOUDRE - A model/photographer AU where Ian and Mickey fall in love the instant they meet and do some crazy things because of that.

HOPE HE MIGHT - A lawyer AU where Ian and Mickey are on opposing sides for the same client, an interesting murder mystery steeped in a religious cult.

Generally I feel like this author is really good at depicting just how unapproachable Mickey can be to anyone that isn't called Ian Gallagher and I eat it up every time.

WHAT THE NIGHT DOES TO THE DAY – andchaos - 9k words

A Gallavich childhood friends AU with a quite original arrangement for the story and the various segments of their lives. Very satisfying read.

RANSOM – BeckyHarvey29 - 112k words

Terry sends his sons to kidnap a Gallagher child to force Frank into paying back the money he owes, unfortunately for him Mickey and his brothers kidnap Ian, and a whole other kind of story unfolds.

Mickey and Ian falling in love in this fic is such a good read. I don't wanna spoil anything of how that or the kidnapping plot goes, since the two are so intertwined. Just know that it will be worth it.

UNDER LOCK AND KEY – Suzy_Queue - 106k words

Ian is assigned the night shift at his new job where he provides spare keys to his fellow college students stuck outside their dorm rooms. To make matters worse his shift coworker is the oh so infamous Mickey Milkovich.

I am magnetized by the way this author writes their pining for each other, their attraction and obsession, how it blooms and unfolds. This fic in particular had me develop a very bad case of tunnel vision, couldn't really turn away until I finished reading it all.

I still haven't read everything this author has to offer, but so far I also loved:

INHUMAN: A mysterious force starts attacking people close to Mickey and it all seems to lead to a mysterious redhead Mickey is oh so coincidentally obsessed with. Very cool paranormal story.

THESE FOOLISH GAMES: Mickey takes over as the boss of the local branch of a trampoline park, where Ian is one of the employees, they annoy each other to no end but what they don't know is that they're secretly texting each other.

IS THERE SOMEWHERE – andchaos - 48k words

Mickey is born with no words on his skin, convinced he's going to live a life of misery cause no one will ever say the words he's destined to hear, he's not a very happy guy. Here comes mute boy Ian who crashes into his life and won't let go.

A classic Soulmate AU, I love that like in a lot of other Gallavich fics their physical connection and compatibility usually comes before their emotional one, it is one aspect that I feel distinguishes their relationship to many other fandom’s ships.

LAST NIGHT AT THE VERONA GRAND HOTEL – the_rat_wins - 27k words

Mickey starts working at an ancient hotel who's supposedly haunted. Mickey doesn't believe in ghost stories, he is much more interested in this one guest he meets at night during his shift.

What a cinematic experience this fic is! Absolutely recommended, the length of it makes it so you can read it in the same time it would take to watch the same story in movie format.

Other fics by the same authors that have impressed me:

FADE THIS ONE TO BLACK: Ian dies of overdose in a pile of snow outside the club, when Mickey finds him there he vows to do anything to get him back.

I don't know why but this fic in particular gives off the vibes of being a pilot for a ya urban fantasy TV series, except we gotta imagine everything that comes after the first episode lol

NO LIE: Ian and Mickey are Soulmates and as such they can't lie to each other. This series is short and sweet and full of feelings, perfect

PARAGRAPHS – pink_ink - 100k words

Ian becomes a reading tutor for ex-convicts, Mickey is among them and Ian starts paying him more and more attention.

This is a story where they meet under very different circumstances and where they've lived slightly different lives compared to canon and yet they're still able to find each other in the end.

Also, sign me up for every fic where Ian has to work just as hard to help Mickey and care for him as the opposite, where Ian's brand of stubbornness is the only way to get through to Mickey.

I'm also adding a couple of ongoing fics, just two to not overwhelm too much.

NONE THE WISER – Loftec - ~218k words

Ian starts visiting Mickey’s diner, it takes a while and yet no time at all to warm up to each other.

I'm captivated by the author's writing style. I love Ian's and Mickey’s relationship. I love how they sort of take their time and yet pine helplessly for each other.

I'm obsessed with the fact that the whole point of the fic doesn't appear until two thirds of the way in cause the diner scenes were just too good to pass up on lol (and I 100% agree with them).

INTRO TO QUANTUM DATING – spoonfulstar - ~563k words

Canon Mickey and Ian meet in University. A college slice of life but drenched in the casual (and not so casual) darkness of canon shameless.

The dark humor in this is fenomenal and left me gasping laughing so many times.

Unexpectedly Ian in this fic is pursuing a linguistics oriented degree, which was what I studied when I tried university, the topics are explained in such an accurate way I have to assume the author studied them themselves and that this story is somewhat a reimagining of their own college experience because if not this would be an absurd amount of accurate research to make.

Reading this fic feels like living through the American college experience from the comfort of my home lol.

As I said before, this author's way of writing does not weight you down even with its length, the story flows perfectly from one scene to the next and before you realize it you've reached the end and you have to accept that 500k words weren't even enough.

Let's end this list with some quick recommendations

WHILE WE'RE MAKING OTHER (PEOPLE'S) PLANS - kyasticlikestea

Mickey is volunteered to organize someone's else's wedding after he managed to salvage his own so well, he'll do it, but his own Southside way.

THIS IS THE ROAD TO RUIN - bricoleur10

Ian and Mickey never go to rob Ned, the story unfolds differently from there. A fix-it with a lot of Gallavich longing , very good smut and some really good dialogue.

HEY, HONEY MINE (I WAS THERE ALL THE TIME) - serveteas

Mickey talks about his crush with Iggy and accidentally pronoun-slips. Short, to the point, funny af and I just really love it. Takes place after their fight at Kash’n Grab in s2.

AGAINST GLASS - AllThatMatters

Ian gets traded from one club to another as a dancer (and more) and ends up in the Milkovich family's club. This is a Mafia!Mickey story with some pretty tight sub-plots, I love his brothers in this.

ONE OF A KIND - fckyeahgallavich

Mickey breaks his finger and it has to be set in the hospital, chaos - of the homophobic kind - ensues. Protective!Ian, I wanna hug Mickey in this.

IAN THE FRIENDLY GHOST - Ravenheart

Ian is haunting an apartment and Mickey starts living in it, Ian is maybe starting to have a crush on him. This isn't angsty!

BLOOD IN, BLEED OUT - brewrosemilk, Whatsastory

Historical AU. Perfectly innocent bystander Ian Gallagher is thrown into the affairs of the Ukrainian Mafia back in 1954, his relationship with Mickey will span decades and he won't remain innocent for long, the mafia can corrupt anyone.

TEENAGE RUNAWAY - sadwhales

Ian comes to live and finish high school with his half siblings on the South Side, he's immediately captivated by a boy sitting under the bleachers, maybe his North Side naivety will catch his attention too.

GARDEN SONG - melwrtiesthings

A glimpse into their lives in their West Side apartment, a lot of initial angst due to a manic episode and then a lot of recovery and healing and learning more about themselves.

[pandafruit]

Ok, I’ve been tossing this AU around in my head for AGES, and I have to get it out or I’m gonna explode.

So in TEC, it’s made pretty clear that there are numerous risks to reviving Butler that even the fairies can’t fully account for. No healing like his had ever been attempted before, and there was really no telling what was gonna happen.

What if, in the face of all this, Holly refuses to heal him?

She’s not a trained medical warlock. She’s on her own. And she’s being asked to desecrate the body of her friend, with unknown, possibly catastrophic results. She refuses, tries her best to console Artemis and goes home.

Now, a lot changes from here.

Artemis obviously isn’t giving up hope. He transfers Butler to longer term cryogenic storage and has human surgeons fix his wounds as best they can in the meantime.

Artemis and Holly’s friendship is shattered. Artemis could never forgive her for not even trying to heal Butler. Holly doesn’t hate him in turn, but she does (mostly) believe she did the right thing, and wishes he would see her point of view. The LEP might still occasionally contact Artemis for help (though not for long - I’ll get to it) but the two of them remain, at absolute best, frosty around each other from then on.

Spiro and Blunt are no longer getting the “off to prison” treatment lmao. Artemis contacts Carla Frazetti and convinces the Chicago mob to turn on Spiro and assassinate both him and Blunt. Afterward, Artemis ends up taking Spiro’s place as benefactor and strategist for the mob. In return, Carla provides him with a security detail when needed (which is how I’m getting around Artemis not dying without Butler every 5 minutes lmao). The relationship proves very beneficial to Carla, and absolutely horrible for Artemis’s moral compass.

Artemis becomes obsessed with learning how to use magic - if the fairies won’t heal Butler, he’ll do it himself. This strains his working relationship with the LEP to the breaking point, and he eventually becomes a fairy fugitive. (I’ll be honest, this one is just bc I think Warlock!Artemis is cool as hell. They should’ve let him keep the magic >:(((( ) (Also cue tragic-yet-awesome scene where Holly is trying to bring him in and they get into a magic fight. The drama. The cinema).

Speaking of his magic! Artemis is no longer actively monitoring Foaly’s work, and the calculation error for the demons goes unnoticed until far too late. Thousands die in Hybras’s return to Earth, and the fairies come dangerously close to being revealed altogether.

When Artemis’s Atlantis Complex hits, because of his decidedly more amoral life path and extra dabbling in magic, it’s a hundred times worse. He has full blown hallucinations, panic attacks, multiple alters, and can no longer access fairy help for any of it. He stumbles by with human OCD treatments, but it’s not nearly as effective. He still refuses to see a psychiatrist.

Eventually, years down the line, Artemis masters magic well enough to revive Butler. It’s both better and worse than it would’ve been had Holly healed him - he no longer has to deal with the Kevlar strands thanks to the human medical intervention, and Artemis was able to train for years specifically to heal him, but the extra time in stasis means it takes even more of Butler’s life force to revive him.

When Butler finally awakes, he no longer recognizes the cold, paranoid, angry young man he used to dutifully protect. Butler may have been the one who was revived, but it’s Artemis who came back wrong.

There’s a million different ways this AU could go, but this is the stuff I’ve been tossing around. Also I know for a fact I haven’t hit every plot hole - PLEASE please share what you guys think would happen with me!! As of rn, I have no name for this AU, so I would appreciate suggestions for that too lmao

[elleloquently]

invisible string : ellie williams

| college!ellie au <3 depending on the feedback and if this is well received/people are interested enough, i would really love to make this a series! i usually just do drabbles and headcanons so this is a little different but i'm really excited about it, hopefully you'll all be excited too!! please let me know if this is worth continuing aaah i have a plot mapped out so more parts?? i am so excited to be actively writing on tumblr again and i just wanted to say hi and thank u to all of my new followers from the past few days!!

| c/w- reader has anxious thoughts

the transition from fall to winter was abrupt;

one morning you open your eyes and the crunchy, orange leaves have curled and gone brown. swirls of chilled air and frozen rain threaten to turn into snow which replaces the brightly colored leaves that once danced and twirled their way from the trees to the ground.

the transition from fall to winter means final exams, impending doom, and a great loss of sleep.

by the way you rushed to class, anyone passing by would've assumed you were running extremely late. however, it was quite the opposite. you needed to be exactly twenty minutes early. twenty minutes early to fix any hair that would've been knotted by the wind, and twenty minutes early to secure a seat that was a perfect distance from the pretty girl with auburn hair that was in your class.

finals season led to the lecture halls being crowded of students who hadn't previously attended class on a regular schedule, and you refused to once again lose the seat that you have been using all semester.

the sound of your shoes echoed through the silent hallway. In a flurry you were pulling your phone out of your pocket, pulling your bag higher on your shoulder and adjusting the bottom of your sweater. you heaved open the classroom door without a moment of checking your surroundings, which caused you to freeze instantly when you caught sight of the auburn girl sitting next to your seat.

the heavy door swung to a loud closing, causing you to outwardly flinch as the girl quickly looked up. the sudden eye contact made you cringe, but it was over as quickly as it happened as she turned back to slouching over her notebook.

in a moment of internal panic, you busied yourself with your bag as you fought with yourself over what to do next. the classroom was nearly empty, would she think you were a freak for sitting directly next to her? on the other hand, you had been sitting in that seat for the entire semester, surely she knew that? then again, she most likely wasn't paying attention to you in the way that you had been paying attention to her...

after a moment of hesitation, you swallowed your pride and slid into your seat with burning cheeks. you were nearly certain her name was ellie, but hadn't managed the courage to speak to her yet and the semester was nearing a close.

ellie was someone who instantly caught your eye. you wanted to be her friend, but never worked up the nerve to start a conversation. you noticed her a lot though, maybe more than you should. admittedly, on the days you have been tempted to skip class, you ended up attending simply due to one reason.

she was funny, you could tell by the way she interacted with other people in the class. and she was pretty. so pretty, in fact, you hadn't wanted to sit directly next to her because it was simply too daunting.

but now here you are.

a hole could've burned through your notebook because of how hard you were staring at it, feeling completely unsure of what to do with your body. sitting next to her made you feel frozen, and you mentally cursed yourself for being so pathetic over someone you didn't even really know.

out of the corner of your eye, you could see ellie twirling a pen through her fingers. you caught sight of her tattoo and thought your gaze might've lingered a little too long because the girl next to you suddenly sighed loudly, causing you to jump and refocus your gaze to your notes.

"alright, scale of one to ten, how fucked do you think you are for the final? I think I'm standing at a solid..six? maybe?"

heart thumping, you turned to meet ellie's gaze. she was staring at you with her eyebrows pinched together, but still had a small smile hanging off of her lips.

"same," you released with a nervous laugh, quickly frowning at your lack of response. you try to will yourself to think of something witty, ultimately failing but ellie smiles anyway.

her change of expression encourages you and you manage to spit something out without overthinking it.

"I really want to be more positive, but I'm horrible at taking tests. like, really horrible. It doesn't matter how much I study or if I love the material... I'm like, done for."

ellie nods and the conversation is short lived, but you're buzzing well throughout class. she doodles on her note pages and pieces of hair fall from her low bun to frame her face. you steal only a couple glances, using all of your power to focus on the professor and not the girl sat next to you.

in your determination to not let your eyes linger, you're completely unaware of Ellie's gaze. she notices your notes, detailed and organized, and the slight frown on your face as you scramble to make adjustments while the professor reviews information.

it's a miracle you're able to focus and class ends ten minutes early, a rarity yet well appreciated. you're trying to decide if you should get another word in with ellie while you're packing up, and she makes it easy on you.

"hey, are you doing that whole study group thing?" ellie askes suddenly, her tone growing in confidence as her sentence finishes.

sliding your notes into your bag, you pretend to think it over. in reality, you never considered the option. the idea of meeting up with people you didn't really know in an attempt to teach other class material sounded like an anxiety nightmare.

"I don't really know," you admit. "are you?"

ellie shrugs, nearly hesitating for a moment before standing and straightening her posture. she carried herself well, you noticed, fighting a burning in your face as you stood awkwardly after her.

ellie didn't verbally answer and her original asking left you curious, but you had homework due soon and no time to delay. after a rushed and mumbled parting, you left the class as quickly as you could without seeming as if you were running away from ellie herself.

the late november air was as unforgiving as the nagging thoughts in your head about a silly study group that you previously had no interest in. you were certain that you were reading way too into things... ellie had only asked a simple question and she surely wasn't going to lose sleep over it.

regardless, you found yourself double checking the date and time that the study group was supposed to meet, and making sure of your availability... just in case.

[ part two ]

[river-lethe-tears]

DC x DP Prompt

Sam gets Summoned

So instead of Danny being the one summoned, this time it’s Sam. Like, being possessed by Overgrowth (or whatever he’s name is stupid plant ghost :/ ) , made her get some cool plant powers and stuff. 

So the cult is trying to summon Overgrowth to return Earth to its former green glory or whatever. But instead gets this small goth girl. Who is suddenly looking very pissed off and angry. And oh no. They try to be really respectful and stuff because what if this is Overgrowth putting them through a test? So they toss their sacrifices into the circle because of course the entity is not happy until it gets what it was promised. 

The sacrifices are probably either Poison Ivy who they somehow got (most likely through threatening Harley than knocking them both out to use as sacrifices) or Red Hood since Jason was dead and all plus Lazarus Pits. (Or Batfamily if you’re more partial to that but I did not think of this prompt with them in mind as the sacrifices lol)

So Sam is really confused and pissed off cause she was in the middle of something with Danny and Tucker and both of those idiots are probably freaking out, so she needs to get back as soon as possible. So she just gives a nasty (burger) glare and just waves her hands. Plants start sprouting from the ground and knocking the cult out. Once Sam done she just rolls her eyes in all her goth glory and walks over to the sacrifices to untie them. Poison Ivy then just watches everything play out with amusement as Harley tries to cheer Sam on. If the sacrifices are Poison Ivy and Harley or Red Hood than they compliment Sam on her skills. If it’s anyone else it’s up to your imagination.

So yeah that happens. Depending on who the sacrifices are, after an undetermined time talking Sam just walks back to the summoning circle. She knows all about this stuff due to all the rants Danny goes on and on with about people being so inconsiderate when summoning him. So she just concentrates and taps into either her liminal status, powers due to Overgrowth, or ectoplasm residue in her system and reverse summons herself back to Amity.

The rest of the bats burst in just as Sam starts to reverse summon herself. And are freaking out or shocked before she is just gone. They only get a few glimpses at her and they can’t grasp the colours since the summoning circle starts to glow bright green. Poison Ivy and Harley won’t really tell them anything since they are amused at the bats frustration. (Bats knew to rescue them cause Selena told them that they were missing; Sirens are reformed(?) in this AU)

So the bats are trying to find out more information on this being the cult summoned and the Sirens aren’t really being that helpful. Selena finds it hilarious after Ivy and Harley inform her what happened. 

Just imagine a few months later there’s a Wayne Gala going on and the Mansons were invited so of course they came and dragged Sam along. Who also ended up dragging Danny and Tucker along. And the bats casually freak out when they see this girl who looks kinda like the being they saw in that warehouse a few months ago. Oh gods above. Poison Ivy please pick up. Please don’t let this be another Gala being crashed. They can handle their rouges, not inter-dimensional beings they have no information about. 

Danny and Tucker naturally finds this hilarious.

Until Tucker gets summoned a month later.

~~~ Please excuse the horrible everything. I am writing this very late, but I had to do a brain dump since this was haunting (haha) my brain. I literally had this idea pop up and not go away while trying to fall asleep. There are so many run off sentences, but I can’t bring myself to care anymore. Sleep waits for no man, woman, or in between before claiming their conscience for a few hours (or days). I might come back later to fix this up and fill plot holes. But that’s a huge maybe. Also I couldn’t be bothered to actually searched up Overgrowth’s real name lol or to fact check anything. My brain is gone. Into the wind. :p

[urhoneycombwitch]

U just haaaaad to go and make another eddie for me to be feral over didn’t you? I need to know everything about roommate eddie pls 🤲🏻

IM IN LOVE W HIM TOO. thank you for giving me the opportunity to speak on it bc I have an origin story for roommate!Eddie with nowhere to go… until now 😈 here’s my other blurb of him btw linking in case others wanna see!! 🫶

so in this nebulous roommates!au, I’m imagining you’re besties with Robin. Eddie is besties with Steve. and of course since Robin and Steve are Ultimate Besties (in every world. in every universe.) they plot to get their respective Others together somehow. like, you’re offbeat and fun and so is Eddie!! should work out great right?

wrong. u and Eddie just don’t hit it off. you think he’s too loud and brash and godforbid he gets more than one beer in him ‘cuz he’ll be pulling you to the dance floor or making his own and embarrassing the everloving shit out of you. and he thinks you need to loosen up and get out of your head, which he decides is his new job that he takes VERY seriously.

eventually Steve and Robin stop trying to force it and yours and Eddie’s relationship just turns into casual frenemies. (a la Harry Met Sally) like, ah yes, You Again. the best friend of my best friend’s best friend 😒 you’ll hang out casually at various house parties and bars but always with a buffer, otherwise you’ll be at each other’s necks with (mostly) playful arguments and hot debates.

and it seems CRAZY at first that you’re gonna live in the same space but holy shit rent is so expensive in the Big City where you all moved to and it mind as well be with someone you know. you’re really worried about the set up but Eddie turns out to be real responsible with monthly payments and has a general respect for shared spaces (his own room is a black hole and it baffles you that he manages to have so many successful one night stands in that hell pit but you’re never in there so who cares.) plus it helps to have a man around fr, to spook the landlord into doing his job 👹 and also to fix things! and to give you lifts to work! and share snack duty! you find a rhythm and it’s great.

the night that he falls for you tho? you’re at group karaoke 3-shots deep and pick a cheesy Beatles song just to piss him off. simpering over your shoulder while you croon into the microphone, giving him a one-man-show that you hope triggers an earworm and irritates for days to come 💖 but actually he’s gripping his beer for dear life on the nearby barstool getting hit with the sickening realization of being in love. like oh fuck, this is bad. I cannot be falling for my pal’s pal. whom I also live with. what a fucking mess.

the night you fall for him? a second date goes sideways and you have no one else to call but Eddie. he fully leaves the solo gig he was about to play because you sounded so upset over the phone (doesn’t tell u that, tho!) and he could be a total asshole about it when he picks you up on the street corner but he absolutely isn’t. chews out your date, tho, with a viciousness that both delights and scares you. makes you a proper meal at home and wraps a strong arm around you on the couch and watches your favorite romcom and laughs at all the parts you laugh at. and you’re pressed up all close, wheels spinning in ur brain, unknowingly going through the exact same thought process Eddie had about a month earlier. Oh No. He’s My Bestie. Whom I Live With. This Cannot Possibly End Well.

aaaaand that about brings us up to canon speed, thus far! you and Eddie date around and have sex in your shared apartment but NOT with each other and if sometimes you get off to the sounds he makes when he’s fucking someone else and if sometimes he gets off to the noises of you in the shower well … no one’s business 🙂‍↔️

like why are u even asking about something soooo personal. like Robin you don’t get it it’s not like that I just wanna be near him all the time. that’s normal and what friends do. no, Steve, you’re not listening, we look at each other’s nudes as buddies. sorry you don’t understand how friendships work 🙄

(Robin and Steve have to set up weekly debriefs to compare notes and make sure they’re not going fucking crazy)

[brucewaynehater101]

I have an au that I thought you might enjoy. It's inspired by Magernia from Pokemon if you've ever seen it's movie. If not, it's OK the plot isn't the important part. What is important is that Tim is not exactly fully flesh.

When Tim first becomes Robin, he knows that he won't be able to hide his partly robotic nature from Bruce for very long so he tells him immediately that he was in an "accident" when he was younger so both of his arms are highly advanced prosthetics. He doesn't elaborate on what the "accident" was and gets uncomfortable when it's brought up. Shockingly, Bruce does respect this and allows Tim to not tell him. He puts the information in Tim's medical file and calla it a day.

Alfred also knows about Tim's arms due to him being the one to normally patch Tim up, if anyone does. Dick however was not told because both Bruce and Tim thought the other told Dick. He gets to find out when one of Tim's hands gets crushed on patrol one night and Tim looks at the mess of wires and metal and just huffs, "this is gunna be a nightmare to fix up, but at least it was only my hand. Could have been a lot worse, right?" Nightwing's freakout is how Tim realized he had no idea Dick didn't know. It was a mess and a half to clean up.

However, Tim did lie to them about his "accident". They find out when Tim gets shot with something two years into being Robin and there is a hole nearly 2 inches across right where his intestines should be. Only there's no blood or gore, only wires, gears, and broken metal. Tim has no flesh insides, simply complex mechanics which are now causing his whole body to glitch out quite a bit. This has the added effect of making Bruce and Dick go absolutely *feral* on the Rouge who just fucked up Tim so badly so they can get him home.

On the way back to the cave, Tim pipes up with glitches and static lacing his voice, "ne-ed-ed-ed to goooo to Dra-Dra-Drake manor-or-or for relac-ace-acement partssss." And well. Bruce and Dick have absolutely no idea how Tim's body works or how to fix him so they don't really have any choice. Bruce has to carry him through the house, through a hidden door into the basement, through two more locked secret doors, and into what looks like a storage room. The walls are lined with wooden boxes and Tim points a shaking finger at one. Inside of it is another Tim??? Only this one's chest panels are open showing a small, empty space about the size of a baseball and cube shapped.

Tim opens his own chest to show that he's fully robotic and his cube space is filled with a silver box with a heart drawn on the front. Tim takes it out carefully and manages to transfer it to the new body before his goes completely limp in Bruce's arms, seeming dead. The New Tim's chest closes as his eyes light up and he says, "Systems Intilizing. Connection complete. Consciousness Transfer Successful. Rebooting... Rebooting... Rebooting. System check... system check passed. Now coming online." The New Tim sits up and says, "OK, everything's good now. Can you put it in the corner so I can fix that old one up later?"

The following interrogating leads to Tim admitting that the "accident" was his whole body and soul getting sealed in an artifact and instead of his parents dealing with the fall out of their heir dying under mysterious circumstances, they contacted a wizard who was able to make the box the artifact of stored in and they had robotic replacement bodies made for Tim so that he could continue to be a "normal kid". Tim insists this is a good thing because while the bodies can and do break, the artifact is indestructible so Bruce doesn't need to worry about him Actually Dying! This is Not Helpful.

Over the following years, Bruce works with any advanced robotics people that he can trust to make better and better bodies for Tim. He wants to let Tim be able to Feel again, rather than just be told the numbers and data. He wants his son to be able to remember what cold feels like instead of just knowing that the metal he touched is 17.6 degrees, or to be able to taste and digest food again instead of just drinking oil or plugging into the wall socet to recharge his batteries.

Also, it's always an Experience, a Rite Of Passage at this point for each new family member to be traumatized the first time Tim blocks a lethal shot for them with his own body and takes Massive damage only to be revealed that he's got a robotic body.

Also, the artifact Tim is locked in? He will never let anyone see it because it's a necklace. It's not big, or flashy, but a simple braided gold chain with an obsidian pendant that has a single ruby at the center. Tim knows at least one of these fuckers would try to wear him.

One of them absolutely would try to wear him. He is so right for that and should protect the necklace at all costs.

I absolutely loved this AU so much. The buildup was fantastic as well. Also, good dad Bruce here with him wanting Tim to be able to experience the world again. It would be so cute if the family had little celebration parties for each milestone (Steph for sure decorated the cake with a "You can taste sour foods again!" or whatever milestone they reached). They just have a really nice family dinner and spend the night playing games, watching movies, pulling pranks, etc.

I'm curious if Tim's robot body can send data to the batcomputer. Like, can he just send recordings of stuff he's seen?

This could tie into the AU where he goes around taking pictures of the Bats after or before he figures out their identities. Instead of lugging around a camera, he takes the data for that night, encrypts it, and then edits the photos for his own perusal.

Overall, super cool concept I'd love to see more of

[moondwellerthatdwells]

the moon spawn au has me by the throat, please tell me about it. Feel free to rant, I will read it if you do. Also feel free not to answer!

Everytime someone asked me/noticed/or even look at stuff about my au i go ajsjsjsjsjsjjshdjsjjsjdjejs, i will be putting it under the cut incase I got on the dashboard of someone who doesn't want to scroll through a whole wall! (an extra one year old doodle for you)

In order to keep myself from exploding i will put in one section and explained some stuff because I dont know where to start

The protectiveness of Moonstone, more stuff to do with Cassandra.

(Note that i will call the Moonstone, the rock She/it, you can call her whatever i just use this)

One thing to be clear Moonstone doesnt like Cass, no not one bit. Like previous posts i mentioned that Its constantly and slowly draining away Cassandra's energy and therefore life, that's how desperate Moonstone is to get away.

But! She likes Varian! Why? Well Varian is a perfect holder to her, he's in a state of panic and is easy to influence, and he's quick, and has a good relationship with the Sundrop! That's all she needs! She's keeping this one!

So it became protective, of its host, because if this one dies then it'll never reunite with its sun. Time to fix plot holes!

Plot hole number one: How did Varian stay alive, wandering for weeks, cold, alone in a forest?

Moonstone drains the life around her to gain energy, keep em going, she's like Varian's life support, or more accurately his own version of adrenaline. There's probably a trail of dead plants, birds and animals in their path.

Plot hole number two: where is Zhan Tiri! And Cassandra!

Cassie's injured and later on arrested when Rapunzel and the gang found her while looking for the missing alchemist. She's unconscious the whole time, woke up in a special cell because Rapunzel doesn't want to put her in the dungeons.

Zhan Tiri stuck close to Cass, she's not completely useless yet! If things get out of hands then possession is the way to go(also Zhan Tiri cant stay near Varian for more than 5 seconds without alerting the Moonstone and blasted away by the sheer power of "DONT TOUCH THE CHILD")

Plot hole number three: what happened after Varian found his way back?

Previous post! Sun managed to soothe the Moon temporarily. And right afterward Varian regains his consciousness, looks around, looks at himself, his bloody hand and then faints.

I like to keep the classic cartoon humor breaks.

They can't remove the Moonstone out of his hand, and it goes crazy whenever Rapunzel is not near. Still gotta use a lost incantation to calm it down. Now where to find it...

And how did black rocks sprout directly from Varian's body?

Under his clothes there's a thin layer of black rock armor . He cant control it, the Moonstone just does whatever she wants, even when Varian is used to the Moon powers he still cant control it.

[magicpiano]

I often see people making posts looking for beta readers and getting no responses, and I think I think a big reason for that is just not providing enough information. So here is some advice of things you should mention in your post:

The rating (and maybe why it has that rating)

Any relevant content warnings

The main pairings, relationships, or characters

The (estimated) length! Committing to betaing a 5k work is very different from committing to a 20k one

If you have a deadline you need to work posted by (like if the story is for an event or a holiday, ect.)

What type of help you are looking for. Do you just want a spelling/grammar check, or are you looking for someone to brainstorm with and point out plot holes?

Maybe just a small summary of what the work is about. It doesn't need to be the fleshed out thing you put in ao3, but a short "coffee shop AU" or "season 2 ending fix it" goes a long way in letting a potential beta know what they are signing up for.

I understand the desire to keep your wips a secret till they are posted, but if you can't find a beta, this is probably why. Many times someone would be willing to beta, but doesn't want to offer because they don't know the above and would feel weird backing out after agreeing, so they just don't say anything.

Finally, remember the person on the other side of the screen is a human being. You are not owed help, they are doing you a favor so be polite.

(Please feel free to add more advice!)

[yeowangies]

chain reaction of countermoves

PAIRING: Jiraiya/AFAB!Reader. CONTENTS: AU - Canon Universe+Modern Setting, Explicit Sexual Content, Reader is Chubby, Age Difference, Alcohol Drinking, Size Difference, Dirty Talk, Praise Kink (lots of terms of endearment). WORDCOUNT: 6680

Summary:

You and Jiraiya met at a bar. A little game ensued.

Notes:

WHY IS THIS SO LONG... there is for real no reason for this having almost 7k words when I was just thirsty... Either way, I feel like this is such a personal fic even if it's just porn with a tiny plot lmao

I don't know how to describe the setting of this only that's a mix between canon universe and modern world. It's not really that important but I should clarify nonetheless.

divider by @/cafekitsune

Jiraiya had seen you around at this same bar fairly frequently. You were always sitting alone by the counter with a cocktail, and the few times he had tried to approach you were the ones when you scurried away faster than lighting. A boyfriend, he assumed, maybe girlfriends. You were always wearing formal dresses, yet showing an abnormal amount of skin, his eyes couldn’t help but wonder. It’s not like he was discreet; if you had any sense of awareness, you probably noticed his eyes burning holes right through you every time you were there. 

This time, the backless dress you had on was so low cut it was a miracle it didn’t slip off your shoulders. 

He was going to die if he did not try to at least speak to you once; he might as well die from a heart attack if you kept revealing more of yourself anyway. Rejection was nothing new, he could tolerate a hot woman like you blowing him off. 

“Every time I see you here, you’re always alone.” You turned your head towards him as Jiraiya took a seat by the stool beside you, grinning smugly and eying you even more intensely now that he got a view of your gorgeous face. “Would you mind if I join you and invite you for a drink?”

Your eyes lingered on his face for a few moments, and he noticed no sign of annoyance or indifference. He took that as a small victory. 

“Braver men have tried, mister.” You purred playfully, averting your gaze towards the half empty glass in front of you.

“‘Mister’, huh? You killed me with that.” Jiraiya laughed; you were clearly much younger than him, but other than that teasing comment, you didn’t seem to want to avoid him. “But no one is braver than me. Can I have your name, darling?”

“Oh, but I don’t think you need it.” 

The way you smiled gave away your intentions. A challenge. Jiraiya couldn’t help but smirk; you had no idea what kind of man you were even talking to.

“You’re gonna make me earn it? I can take on a challenge, especially if the prize is as tempting as you.”

His eyes were fixed on your face when you turned to look at him, with a lot more attention than you did before. He could see the curiosity gleaming as you scanned him up and down, and up again, holding his gaze for a hot minute with a smirk on your lips. 

Goddamnit, you were gorgeous. And you weren’t even saying no; you were playful and sultry, and that just spurred him on. 

“Are you not gonna tell me yours?” You asked before downing what was left on your glass. 

“Two can play this game.” Jiraiya grinned at your sudden interest, as he gestured for another bottle of sake to the bartender. “So, how about that drink, sweetheart?”

You had opened your mouth to reply at the same time your phone rang. He gave it a quick glance, in an attempt to see the name displaying on the screen, before you put it away.

“Maybe some other time.” You got off your stool at the same time he did; he wanted to help you like a gentleman would, but you were quick in grabbing your purse and leaving money on the counter. “See you later, mister.”

You flashed him that mischievous smile of yours as you strode towards the door. His eyes went straight to the exposed skin of your back all the way down to your ass. He could feel himself getting hard, imagining what it’d be like to touch your naked body. 

Maybe some other time, like you said. 

*

That single interaction was carved in his mind, and while Jiraiya didn’t see you for days after that, he thought about you often. Probably not in ways a gentleman should think about a lady after simply exchanging pleasantries, but he had always been very easily enticed. And you were alluring to a new level.

While a handful of women flirted with him right back when he did, most of them were more eager about punching his lights out when he said something remotely inappropriate. You seemed keen on keeping the conversation going, so he should definitely try and push things a little further if he ever saw you again. Just out of morbid curiosity.

Which happened to be exactly two weeks after that first encounter. 

Jiraiya saw you sitting at the usual stool, wearing a dress that didn’t seem to be as revealing until he approached you, his eyes immediately landing on your cleavage. 

“Fancy seeing you here again,” He said, taking a seat by your side before ordering a bottle of sake. “I missed seeing your lovely face around the bar, you know?”

When Jiraiya was able to avert his eyes from your chest, he took a look at your face, and he noticed something slightly off, though he couldn’t quite pinpoint what the issue was. You seemed a little dull, though not as much to make your beauty dilute. Every man at the bar had their eyes on you after all. 

He assumed it must have been a problem with the hypothetical boyfriend you must have; there was no way a woman like you was single. Not that he cared as much. 

You still offered him a small smile when you turned to look at him, gulping down what was left of your glass before speaking. 

“Are you gonna tell me you haven’t been flirting with other women while I wasn’t here?”

“I thought of you every time.” Jiraiya grinned when you snorted, amused at his silly comment. 

“I’m sure you did, you perverted old man.”

“I can accept the pervert comment, but I draw the line at ‘old man.’” He feigned offense, glaring at you playfully and taking the opportunity to ogle. 

“That’s where you draw the line?” You laughed, turning your body slightly to his side. 

Jiraiya wouldn’t consider himself lucky with women at all, no matter how many of them had actually given him the time of day. But he could read body language incredibly well, and based on that alone, you seemed more than interested in him. You were locking eyes even for fleeting seconds, you were obviously aware of your own body as you let him get a better view of the curve of your breasts when you turned. At the very least, you liked his attention, and he was more than eager to give it to you. 

“What can I say, I had never been accused of being proper.”

“Of course, you had been staring at my boobs since you sat down.”

The grin on his face grew wider when he noticed your smile, and the way your eyes gleamed. He was on his second bottle of sake, but that didn’t stop him from feeling aroused at this simple conversation. 

“Oh, baby girl, you’re basically shoving them in my face.” The blush on your face was new and adorable. You didn’t respond to his comment, and Jiraiya assumed you must have been embarrassed but not turned off at all since you were grinning. “You want me to stare.”

“Maybe.” You replied in a tone that gave away your interest in him.

“Baby, I’m flattered you want me to admire you so much.”

“‘Admire’, yeah, right.” You snorted, crossing your legs. You were wearing a long dress but it was still inevitable for his eyes to dart to the curves of your hips. “I don’t know if that’s the word I’d use.”

“What’s the word then?” Jiraiya asked absentmindedly.

“Ogling, maybe. Drooling, like the pervert I know you are.”

“Now, I never denied being a pervert, but you’re being a little unfair.”

“How so?” You asked, showing him your empty glass, signaling for him to pour some of his sake on it, and he gladly obliged.

“You expect me to be decorous when you’re wearing something so tempting, and looking at me with those eyes.” Jiraiya locked his gaze with yours, and smiled smugly when he found surprise in your reaction. 

“What eyes?” You asked as you brought the glass to your lips. 

“Eyes that make me want to bury my face between your legs and make you cum with my tongue.”

Self confidence spread inside his chest when he saw you splutter on the sake, drenching half your face with the liquid as it dripped down your chin and onto your chest. Not only had Jiraiya made you lose your cool, but you were wet as well, maybe not in the sense he’d like, but he knew this was the best counter move he could have made as he watched beads of alcohol slide down your cleavage. Moreover, the blush on your face and the fact that you hadn’t hit or insulted him could only mean one thing.

The grin on his face grew wider when you could only avert your gaze, not being able to make eye contact, and the blush had spread up to the tip of your ears as your hands covered your face to hide your nervous smile. He laughed boisterously, in disbelief of how adorable you were while being so absolutely hot at the same time. 

“I didn’t think I’d get such a cute reaction from you!” 

“Shut up!”

“You’re not immune to my charms after all!”

That last comment earned Jiraiya a slap in his arm, which he barely even felt, but he groaned nonetheless, bending over as if he had been truly hurt. 

“You’re such a pervert!” You muttered with a smile and a faint red tint still adorning your cheeks. 

“Don’t tell me now you didn’t imagine what I said in that pretty little head of yours.”

You looked at him with big eyes that would make his knees wobble if he was standing. Oh, he was dying to touch you in the most inappropriate ways. 

Before you could even open your mouth to reply, your phone rang, distracting you from his attention. Jiraiya frowned as he noticed your expression droop when you eyed the screen. 

“Maybe I can tell you what I imagined next time.” You showed him a half hearted smile as you grabbed your things before standing up.

Curious yet frustrated about whatever it was that seemed to get in between the two of you, Jiraiya kept his gaze glued to your butt as you walked out. 

*

You were back at the bar less than a week later, at your usual spot, and Jiraiya thought to himself that while being a frequent drinker must not have been good for his health, he could not give a flying fuck about it if he got at least an hour of sunshine. And when you walked in, sunlight came through.

But like last time, your expression seemed clouded, even when you noticed his presence as he approached you. 

“So tell me, mister, do you live in this bar?” You asked him before he could even open his mouth. 

Jiraiya rolled his eyes. Again with the ‘mister’. He wished you would just tell him your name so you would stop calling him that. He was old, but you made him sound ancient. 

“I guess I’m just lucky enough to be here when you are.” He replied, grinning when you flashed him a smile. 

He could always admire you better when he was beside you, and he did not waste time in doing so. Your dress was long, as always, with a deep cut on the side, revealing the juicy skin of your leg all the way up to your thigh. He briefly imagined what it’d be like to grab and squeeze it in his hands, if you were as soft as you seemed and what it’d be like to run his tongue along your skin, before focusing his attention back on your pretty face. 

“Aren’t you tired of talking to me?” You asked, swirling the drink you just ordered in your hand. 

“I’m having the most fun every time we talk.” Jiraiya blinked, baffled. 

“Liar, you just wanna get laid.” You chuckled. 

“That’s besides the point, you’re funny and easy to talk to and you haven’t told me to fuck off, so I assume my presence is not unwanted either.”

Jiraiya grinned, pleased with himself when you laughed. He hadn’t lied; you were quick-witted, especially in responses to his sometimes lame lines, yet he couldn’t forget how embarrassed you were during your last conversation with him. That just made you even more charming. 

At the very least, you liked him. Even if maybe you weren’t sure if you wanted to have sex with him (yet). He could keep trying until the next mission called for him. 

“So I’m not one of your many conquests, then.” You looked at him with a smug smile.

“You know how it is, women fall at my feet naturally.” Jiraiya replied, holding his chin up. “But you’ve been the most interesting chase.”

“Or maybe you’re being an interesting chase for me.”

Oh, the way his entire body heated up at your words, and even more so when you eyed him as if he was a piece of meat. His cock inevitably twitched inside his pants, eager and anxious to be inside of you. Soon, hopefully. 

Maybe this had been your game the whole time, and he was just a pawn on your board. 

His face was probably giving away the thoughts in his head when he saw your grin getting wider until you started laughing again. 

“What are you thinking about?” You asked, still snickering. “Something perverted for sure!”

“Maybe one day you’ll get to find out.” Jiraiya replied before downing his glass of sake, feeling his cheeks warm up intensely. 

You were still grinning when your phone rang. He was getting sick and tired of that thing, he should accidentally destroy it next time. 

You frown as you eyed the screen, before offering him a smile as you stood up. 

“Sorry for cutting down the chase earlier this time.” You finish your cocktail, the only cocktail you had that night, in one gulp, before putting on your coat and leaving some money on the counter. 

Jiraiya stared, memorizing your every move and the curves of your body; no matter how many times he had seen you (which weren’t even that many), it wasn’t enough to appreciate and admire you. 

“I’m not letting you go next time.” He said with a smirk. 

“Oh?” You returned the same playful smile. “I can’t wait, then.”

He caught your scent as you turned. Vanilla and coconut. Would you be as sweet if he were to taste you? It took everything in him not to grab your arm and pull you towards him. 

Jiraiya was definitely not letting you go next time. 

*

There was a pattern in the days you usually went to the bar, Jiraiya noticed. Usually on Fridays or Saturdays, though that didn’t surprise him, it was usual for anyone to use the weekend to unwind. But the first few nights, the ones where he didn’t approach you (but definitely noticed you in your tight little dresses) were Wednesdays or Thursdays. You didn’t go there every week either. The three times he had talked to you had taken place in the span of two months. 

It was creepy how much Jiraiya was analyzing the situation. He wasn’t stalking you or anything; but he meant what he said last time. He was going to make a decisive move when he saw you next time. And he wanted that to be soon. 

But he wasn’t expecting that to be when he was about to walk into that same bar. 

Jiraiya saw you walking, rather hurriedly, towards the entrance, and you noticed him at the same time he did. He grinned at you, smugly as he always did. The look on your face should have given away your next moves, but he didn’t figure it out until you were actually an inch away from him. 

Wrapping your hands around his neck, you pulled him down to meet you halfway, pressing your lips against his in a clumsy kiss, noses bumping together. 

Making a nose of surprise, Jiraiya couldn’t believe that you were actually kissing him. Out of nowhere. Unprovoked. Whatever plan he might have considered before was thrown out the window, and he slowly wrapped his arms around your back, returning the same affection you were giving him. 

Pulling away, the deep shade of red on your cheeks gave away your shyness, but he was still bewildered, probably sporting a stunned look on his face. Confirmed when you snickered, keeping your arms safely wrapped around his neck. 

“Hi.” 

“Hi…” He replied, voice hoarse from the surprise. 

“Do you still like me?”

“Yeah.” Jiraiya frowned, nodding enthusiastically, confused on why you even have to ask that. 

“Good.” You smiled widely, pulling him down for a brief kiss again, one that he could return right away. “Wanna go somewhere else?”

“Yeah!” He replied quickly, making you giggle again. 

Taking his hand into yours, you smiled, biting your lips in a shy nervous manner, before urging him to walk with you. 

Damn it. Jiraiya was stunned; you had actually made your countermove before he could actually even make his move on you. 

However, he had thought about where he’d like to fuck you, given the chance. When he mentioned he had a place in mind, you followed his lead. He had been fantasizing about having you all for himself for way too long to let it happen in a small, cheap motel room, no matter that he had one night stands in place like those. But a woman like you, who had him so hooked before he even said hello for the first time, deserved a fancy hotel room, one where you can both stay the whole night without worries. 

It was there, at one of the most high end hotels nearby, that Jiraiya remembered he didn’t even know your name. 

You whispered it low and sultry against his lips, kissing him fervently as you stepped into the hotel room, burying your hands in his long hair and tugging at it, making him groan wantonly, so turned on by simply having you close. The dress you were wearing that night underneath your coat wasn’t as plunging as other times, a pastel color fitting your body in a loose manner as he ran his hands up and down your sides, gripping at your body tightly, memorizing all your curves as you bit his bottom lip. 

“I’m Jiraiya-” Jiraiya started, holding you firmly against him as he gazed at your face. He was prepared to make one of his fabulous introductory monologues, but the look in your eyes made him frown. “You know who I am.”

*

Of course you knew who he was. 

He had seemed familiar when he approached you at the bar that first night, but you weren’t entirely sure if you were dreaming, or if he was actually that author from those romantic adult novels, novels that you actually enjoyed a lot. When you went home that night, you corroborated it yourself by checking the picture of him at the end of the book. Sure, he was a little younger in the photo, but it was definitely Jiraiya. 

Not only an erotic novelist of best selling books, but also a legendary Sannin. You knew that much.

He was actually much more handsome in person. Tall, and big. Something you didn’t expect; even in your heels, you barely reached his shoulders. Not to mention he was actually interested in you. Getting sex with you, sure, but you still took that as a compliment, even though everything in him screamed ‘womanizer’. 

You never got a lot of chances for casual sex with strangers who piqued your interest as much as Jiraiya did, so you decided it was time to experiment something that might be otherworldly. What was the worst that could happen?

“Was it obvious?” You asked him, pleased with yourself. He stared at you for longer than you expected, but his hold on your hips was firm so you didn’t try to pull back. 

“No, it wasn’t,” Jiraiya replied, eying you up and down briefly. “You’re a cunning woman.”

“Please,” You rolled your eyes. “I wasn’t even trying to be sneaky. Don’t tell me you’re scared of me now.”

It was his turn to roll his eyes before scoffing, giving your hips a squeeze. 

“I’m gonna be alert from now on.” 

Jiraiya didn’t give you a chance to reply as he kissed you rather roughly, bumping his nose against yours as he licked your lips. You made a noise of surprise but followed his pace easily. 

You had found your initial attraction to him as a distraction, but the more you talked at that bar, the more you liked him. It was the first time you laid eyes on an older man, and you would have thought someone his age would flirt better than he did, but his attempts (and even his perverted comments) had awoken your curiosity. And so far, his kisses were igniting a nice warm sensation in your insides, one you hadn’t felt in a long time. 

Breaking up with your boyfriend a few months ago had brought you down more than you’d like, and the subsequent attempts at rebounding with blind dates hadn’t worked as well. The only thing that brought you a small amount of joy were your brief encounters with Jiraiya. 

That, and the fact that he made you feel like you were the hottest woman on Earth. It was a small detail in the grand scheme of things, but you had rarely felt that way, especially with the men you dated, and you had to wonder if there was something wrong with them or with you. No matter that the night you were going to spend with Jiraiya was going to be a one time thing, you already felt more by playing pretend with him, than you did with all the other men you’ve been with in your life. 

You just hoped the main event was just as sparkly as the kissing was. 

Pushing at his shoulders, you pulled away from his lips until Jiraiya let go of you, hands falling to his sides as he looked at you, confused when you took a few steps back. Taking off your coat, you threw it at the nearest chair before reaching for the zipper at the back of your dress.

When you let your dress slip down your body, falling to the ground, and saw the look on his face when he found out you weren’t actually wearing any underwear, you’ve never felt more powerful. His jaw was hanging wide, eyes popping open as he scanned you, and you couldn’t help but snicker. You were embarrassed for doing that, cheeks flushed, having never done anything like it; but getting that reaction in response was worth everything. 

“Oh, baby, baby, you’re gonna give me a goddamn heart attack.” Jiraiya said, taking off his haori at the same time he kicked off his sandals, nearly tripping with his own feet and making you laugh. 

“That’d be fun!”

“So you have been trying to kill me all this time.” He smiled, amused, throwing his hand guards to the floor as his eyes scanned every bit of you when he took a few steps closer. “Fuck, you’re even hotter than I imagined.”

“‘Imagined’, huh?” You took a few steps back towards the bed as you slipped off your mule heels, and Jiraiya followed you, keeping his eyes mostly on your chest and legs, which made heat rise on your cheeks. “So, what have you been imagining? Care to share?”

“Oh, a lot of things.” He took your hand, leading you towards the bed as he sat down on it, keeping you in front of him. His eyes never left your body, and you started to feel more and more self conscious with each passing second; though the lascivious gleam in his gaze prevented you from trying to cover yourself. “For once, your tits are even more gorgeous than whatever I was picturing in my head.”

You bit your lip to contain the gasp that was about to spill out when his hands reached for you. Jiraiya cupped your breasts, squeezing them gently and pressing them together. Even in his big hands, your tits were a handful, and when he ran his thumbs over your nipples, you couldn’t help the small moan that left your lips. He smirked triumphantly, repeating the same action, making you close your eyes shyly.

“You’re also much more sensitive than I expected.” He said, licking his lips as his hands slid down your waist. “Come here, sweetheart.”

You offered him a small smile when Jiraiya gestured for you to sit on his lap, hesitant for a brief second before he tugged at your hand. You obliged, sitting on his thighs with your legs on one side, putting an arm around his shoulders as he wrapped his hand around your waist, keeping a firm grip. 

When his fingers trailed the inside of your thigh, nudging your legs to open, blush spread across your cheeks. You didn’t exactly know why you were embarrassed in this situation but you had a hunch; you expected him to take you at once, but he seemed to be playing with you, and you felt exposed with every slow movement of his fingers. And while you were completely naked, he still had most of his clothes on.

“You’re shy now?” Jiraiya asked, pressing a kiss to your neck. 

“Only a little…” 

A gasp escaped your lips when Jiraiya promptly pressed the tip of his fingers to your folds, prodding your clit. The slick sound produced only embarrassed you more; he hadn’t really touched you but you were already aroused. 

You moaned loudly when he focused his attention on your clit, pressing his fingers and stroking it gently yet steadily, making your thighs quiver as you naturally spread your legs more, your body ready to accept more of his affection. 

“Oh, the sounds you make,” Jiraiya whispered against your ear, voice giving away his lust. “So fucking pretty.”

You let out a breathy laugh, cut short when one of his digits traced your entrance, pressing inside the tip. Clutching his kimono, you kissed him fervently when he slid a finger in, thrusting with expertise, simultaneously rubbing your clit with his thumb. He smirked against your lips when you whimpered again, hips moving against his hand. The grip he had on your waist was strong; even when you started seeking more of his touch, he held you in place, giving you a sense of security that he wasn’t going to let you slip away or fall. 

Trailing his lips down your chest, Jiraya took a nipple in his mouth, suckling gently as he pressed another finger into you. You hummed, cradling his head to your breasts, his tongue deliciously teasing your sensitive skin at the same time his digits grazed inside so right. It took you by surprise how well he seemed to know your body, and you easily fell into the rhythm of his moves, a warm sensation quickly blooming in your abdomen. 

Your hips jerked when his thumb rubbed your clit at the same time his fingers stroked your inner walls, eliciting a sharp moan from your lips. 

“You’re gonna be such a tight fit, baby,” Jiraiya grunted against the curve of your tits, planting an open mouth kiss there. “Have to get you ready, real nice and wet for me.”

His husky voice made the muscles in your abdomen tighten, clenching around his fingers as pleasure pulsed through your veins. He had been right about your sensitivity, and his focused attention on your chest, tongue swirling around your nipple, as his fingers glided in and out of you faster, made the build up of your impending orgasm much more intense than you were used to. Your thighs pressed together in reflex, practically trapping his hand, as you let out a shaky moan. 

“You like my fingers, princess?” Jiraiya asked with a quiet laugh, pulling away from your chest to look at your face. “Close already?”

You could barely form a sentence, panting as you nodded eagerly. 

With a smirk on his lips, Jiraiya slid his hand from between your legs. You yelped, clinging to his neck, surprised when he easily picked you up and moved you. He hovered above you, kissing your lips sweetly before sliding downwards, taking the nipple he had left unattended in his mouth. You mewled when he graced his teeth over your skin before eagerly sucking on it.

You didn’t think he’d be so focused on your pleasure when you walked into that room, but when he kneeled on the floor, tugging at your legs and hoisting them over his shoulders, your heart skipped several beats, your slick dripping down your thighs in anticipation. 

“I did say I was gonna make you cum with my tongue.” Jiraiya licked his lips, grinning as he pulled your hips closer to his face. 

The heat in your tummy surged at once at the sight alone of his face between your legs. With a hand on your thigh, slightly opening your legs for him, Jiraiya buried his face against your entrance, not wasting any second in pressing his tongue inside and tasting you. He groaned at the same time you moaned, legs shivering when his nose dug against your clit. 

“Oh fuck, fuck, fuck…” You panted, glossy eyes looking down at him as he began his ministrations.

He had an obvious goal, lapping at your hole, nuzzling his face against your folds. You would have been embarrassed in any other circumstance, but you were so close to the edge already, waves of pleasure building up rapidly. When he ran his tongue over your clit, sliding two fingers back inside you, you let out a long whine. 

You tried to keep your eyes open, watching Jiraiya skillfully eat you out, humming and slurping loudly as if he was tasting the most delicious food, but it was proving to be a challenge when he lapped and sucked at your clit. Your hands reached for his head, threading your fingers through his hair, tugging at the protector on his forehead as you tried to anchor yourself to anything you could hold onto. 

The noises he made from his mouth and tongue, and his fingers pumping in and out of your hole with a fast steady pace added to your arousal, and you knew you were making a mess, dripping onto the sheets and his face, but he sounded so happy, you couldn’t hold off anymore. 

With a sharp moan, the knot in your abdomen unraveled when you came. Your vision turned white, toes curling as your thighs shook around his head, keeping him there until your orgasm subsided. 

Jiraiya chuckled darkly against your folds, keeping his eyes focused on you while he helped you ride your peek, sliding his fingers in and out, coaxing more of your release to leak down his hand and chin. He only stopped when you tugged at his hair, legs quivering when he prod your clit with his nose. 

You watched him through half lidded eyes as he stood up, chin and cheeks glistening with his saliva and your slick as he grinned down at you. Looking at you like he wanted to eat you whole, as if he hadn’t just been between your legs. 

That wasn’t what you weren’t expecting from this man at all. When Jiraiya tugged at the protector on his forehead, discarding it haphazardly before he urgently began undressing, you couldn’t help but snicker. He must have been desperate to get his fill and it amused you to no end. 

“Having fun, baby girl?” He asked, smirk getting wider when you smiled. The term of endearment did something for you, and the skin between your legs pulsed. 

“I am, you should work on your stripper skills, though.” You giggled when Jiraiya tried to take off his mesh armor and pants at the same time. 

Your eyes fell on his shaft once he was fully naked, and you couldn’t help but stare. You should have known, considering how tall and well built he was, that he’d be impressive with the size of his cock as well. It still took your breath away to see it so thick, long and standing at attention, bobbing when he crawled over you. Your mouth watered at the sight, but the need to have him inside you was stronger than attempting to suck him off.

Sliding towards the center of the bed, you noticed the scar on his chest. Your curiosity piqued, but you remained quiet, quickly distracted as Jiraiya ran one of his hands up your side, kneading the flesh of your waist until he reached your tit, giving it a rough squeeze. 

“You like it when I touch you here, don’t you, baby?” He asked when you whimpered, keeping his eyes on your chest. “I should have taken my time to play even more with your tits.”

“Maybe next time.” You repeated words you had said on another occasion; you hadn’t really intended to say them outloud, but you were relieved when Jiraiya looked at you with giddiness. 

“Next time.” He coincided.

You wondered if the mischief in his eyes was a default feature of his as he grabbed your legs, pressing them against your chest until your sex was on full display. In desperate need of having him finally fuck you, you tried to move your hips as much as you could when he stroked his erection against your folds. His size should have been worrying for any other woman, but you were dying to feel the stretch of his cock since the day you laid eyes on him. 

“Fuck, princess, do you know what you’re doing to me?” Jiraiya asked breathlessly, pressing the tip of his cock against your clit, making your thighs jolt in his grasp. 

“I know, and I want you to hurry up!” You breathed desperately. 

“Relax, I’ll give you exactly what you want.” He reassured you.

His tone gave away his own need, and he pressed the head of his dick against your entrance, steadily pushing in. You moaned, legs tensing as your muscles accommodated to his size, so thoroughly full once his hips were pressed flush against you, his cock deliciously filling you up to the brim.

“You fit me so well.” Jiraiya groaned, voice hoarse, as if he was being tortured. “I knew your pussy was gonna be tight, but you feel so much better than I could ever imagine.”

“Yeah?” You asked, a little dumb.

“Yes, baby girl.” He smiled down at you, slightly sliding his cock out before slowly thrusting in. “It’s the best pussy I’ve had.”

As Jiraiya started a slow yet hard pace, firm hands holding your thighs against your chest, the warmth in your abdomen bloomed again, rapidly growing each time the tip of his cock grazed your insides, sparkles dancing behind your lids. You whimpered and whined, making all kinds of noises, enjoying the glide and the nice build up of another orgasm. The skin between your legs throbbed, aching from taking such a huge man, but you adored it, heartbeats increasing inside your ribcage.

“You should see how fucking pretty you look right now.” His words were like honey, increasing your arousal, coating more of his cock with your slick. “Taking me so well.”

You moaned louder when his thrusts got faster, eyes rolling into the back of your head. Your legs shook in his grasp, muscles strained from the position you were in. The pace was nice, you knew you’d cum eventually if he kept going; but you just yearned for a little more closeness, for his touch and his kisses and his hands. You wanted him to consume you. 

Your hands reached for Jiraiya, sliding up his forearms, running your nails on his skin when he thrust into you particularly hard, ripping a sharp mewl from your throat. 

“What is it, sweet girl?” He looked at you with dark eyes, smiling at you as he leaned down. “Need a kiss?”

You nodded eagerly while Jiraiya hooked your legs on his elbows, easing his way down until his lips touched yours. A sweet kiss, tasting the remains of your last orgasm, courtesy of his tongue. In contrast to the hard rhythm of his hips as they snapped against yours, brushing your clit on the way, and you couldn’t even focus on his tongue as it found its way into your mouth. 

Wrapping your arms around his neck, you threaded your fingers through his long hair in an attempt to anchor yourself to something. The pace was ruthless, your brain had turned to mush in consequence, pleasure pulsing through your veins.  

You couldn’t believe you were going to cum so soon. You didn’t question his magical powers, but you knew he must have some if he was going to make you orgasm twice in record time.

“You’re gonna-” Jiraiya grunted into the kiss, just as lost in your body as you were in his. “Fuck, you’re gonna make cum soon, baby girl.”

You moaned breathlessly, tugging at his hair, in a weak attempt to warn him about your impending climax. He didn’t seem to need it, still pushing his cock inside you at the same unforgiving pace.

“Come on, baby, I wanna feel you cum on my cock,” Jiraiya smiled against your lips, a smile that only the devil would have. “Need to feel you cum.”

You didn’t need the incentive, but his voice was like honey and the way he spoke was so lewd and fuck, it did things to you. 

It didn’t take long before the knot in your tummy snapped as his hips jerked against you, his cock ripping an intense orgasm from you. Stars danced behind your lids, body trembling underneath him. You stuttered a moan, digging your nails on his shoulders when his pace faltered, hips stammering forward as your walls clamped down on him. 

With a growl rumbling deep from his chest, Jiraiya promptly reached his own peak, cock throbbing as he spilled his cum inside you, filling you to the brim, prolonging your state of bliss. 

You groaned weakly when he collapsed on top of you, letting go of your legs and burying his face in your neck. He was heavy, but you didn’t mind it at all, your mind still trying to comprehend what just happened as you tried to catch your breath, and you welcomed his warmth. That was the best sex you’ve had by far; he had rendered you speechless, for God’s sake. 

Humming, you ran your fingers through his hair soothingly when Jiraiya started planting hot lazy kisses on your neck. He pulled out after a minute, when you started to really feel the weight of him on top of you, thighs and hips aching from the strain of the position you had been in as well as the deep thrusts of his cock. His cum leaked out of your hole, and you watched him admire the sight for a moment with the usual salacious gleam in his eyes before slumping next to you on the mattress.

You still had the whole night in that room, and you desired more. Once you tasted heaven, you couldn’t stop.

Coyly trailing soft fingers up his arm, you heard him groan as Jiraiya ran his hand through his hair. 

“You’ll have to give me a minute if you wanna go again. I can’t get it up as quickly as I used to.” 

You couldn’t help but snort before covering your mouth, trying to contain your laugh as Jiraiya sneaked his arm around your shoulders with a grin, pulling you close and tickling your side.