#i might do some expressions too..
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hawthorne sprite HAWTHORNE SPRITE!!!!!!!! yippee
#really happy w this. stuck to the art style as hard as i could ok which means i gave him the little eye shine which pained me but itsfineeee#couldnt fit his eyelashes in smoothly either 😔#its fine its all good man#i futzed w the face so fkn much#his outfits so minimal thank fuck for that (at least for now. i wanna rlly get in there at some point n add more stuff to it for funsiessss#im also kinda indecisive abt his sleeves... do i yoink ollys sleeves or do i keep the ones from the og sketch... ough#im just gonna flipflop to whatever i want in the moment fuck it#fields of mistria#fom farmer#my art#hawthornessaltwaterfarm#I LOVE HIMMMMMMM WEHHHHHH#i might do some expressions too..#ok wait i have to show yall the full row of versions i went through while working on this bc its glorious. its going in a rb tho hold up
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My Personal Headcanon On Why Amy's Love For Sonic Died Down Lately (and their dynamic)
When they were younger, Amy's love for Sonic was pretty extreme, and Sonic was, understandable, uncomfortable for the most part. He knows she means well, but that girl needs to calm down.
She can fight, but sometimes her hammer could only stun her enemies for a while. (It took her a long time to get rid of that robot that has been chasing her around Station Square.) She wasn't fully independent yet, even if she fought on her own a couple of times.
She often follows Sonic and his friends around. She is part of the team, but she was not a strong as she is now at the time yet.
She admires Sonic. A LOT. And Sonic knows that. Obviously, he could only run away from something like that, since he is NOT ready for that kind of thing, and whether Amy takes the hint or stop, she still loves him.
...BUT, I think things were slightly starting to change between her and Sonic after Lost World.
Remember this line?
You remember that? Okay, okay. Here's another totally unrelated question:
Before the events of Lost World, when was the last time Amy said "I love you" to Sonic out loud?
...YEP. 😈 (Unless I'm missing something, let me know lmao)
As more games and adventures come out, the characters get slightly older, and Amy is 12 to 13 now, and she is most certainly at that age where her body starts to change, but especially on how she views Sonic.
She knows she loves Sonic, but it was this moment during her change where she actually wanted to admit that she loves him.
I believe that Amy was all about sharing her affection to him not through confessions, but through obvious hints. Sonic totally got it, and there was no need to confess. Sonic knows she loves her.
...But she never said it. And she almost did, but she never did again for a while.
I think this was the moment in her life where, oh, God, she actually loves Sonic. SHE LOVES HIM, WHAT.
And she was looking back at all the times she had with Sonic that she can now see were unpleasant to Sonic (At least that's what she thinks) and that's probably why she isn't so expressive about her love to him than how she used to back then.
She wasn't sure what to do with this realization, and sets aside it for a while, and nearly stayed as her casual, peppy self... until the Eggman War happened.
During the 6 months of being with the Resistance, fighting Eggman's army all day and all night, all she can think of was Sonic.
She dreams that he still with not just her, but with her friends. She just wanted to see Sonic again, she just wants to be with her hero again.
But I'd like to think that she was also thinking about how she used to treat Sonic back when they were younger, how Sonic would almost always run away from her whenever she asks him out, or always look so uncomfortable whenever she gets so close to him.
Cringing at those memories big time, she wanted to change and hopefully when Sonic is okay and comes back, she can be better for him.
...Or will he still find her uncomfortable regardless? Would he even be happy to see her at all if he did survive?
But, hold on! She can't just give up her love for Sonic! He made her who she is today! A peppy, nature-loving, hammer-swinging, confident, brave... loud-mouth... annoying... Sonic obsessed... weak... pathetic... lonely little girl.
If she gives up on Sonic, it'll be like she gave up on the one hedgehog who saved her life. If she didn't she'll still be the same ol' Amy.
I also like to think she had parents a long while before she met Sonic, and was even expecting a little sister, but a robot invasion happened from where she was and attacked her parents and instead of trying to save them, after getting hurt, she ran away, hoping that they'll come back okay. But they never did.
She was all alone, and needed someone, a friend, a new family, someone who will hold her hand, anyone, to be there for her. But she was ignored by lots, and at that point, she's better off by herself, but still longed for company.
Eventually though, her tarot cards told her her future hero, and there might be hope after all. She encountered Sonic, held onto the belief of the cards tight, and the rest is history.
So, with that headcanon in mind, not only did Amy loose her parents that she didn't save because of her cowardliness (she was only so little at the time that happened) and also Sonic, who she thought will be her only hope, but now gone.
She doesn't even care if he did come back, he'd probably hate her now after everything she did to him, always talking about their "future wedding" or forcing him to go to Twinkle Park.
For the last few months of the war, it was nothing but Amy mentally beating herself up for either refusing to change or moving on, and they are both not fine choices.
She loves Sonic, but he does not love her, and she finally, finally realized it. And it's probably for the best if no body loved her at all.
But of course Sonic did survive and all of her worries wash away in an instant, she's just not expressive about her love for Sonic AT ALL now, since she's still worried about it but rather not mention it to Sonic because it doesn't matter.
If Sonic doesn't love her, then her feelings don't matter to him, and according to Amy herself, that is okay.
But also, I'd like to think that Sonic was thinking about his friends a lot up in the Death Egg for the past months, sometimes it's Tails (worried for his safety), sometimes it's Shadow (because he's wondering why he would join Eggman.) At some point, for a few days, Amy was in his mind the longest, and he felt bad about how he thought he was rude and pushy to her.
He wondered if she's not thinking about it too much, and if she is, will she give up on him? Yeah, he doesn't feel the same and still not looking for a relationship, but it's so strange but interesting how anyone could ever like someone like Sonic the Hedgehog. Amy was never afraid to show that, and she probably might be now.
He couldn't help but feel guilty. They were kids when she was like this, but he was so... arrogant at the time too. Not a lot happened at the time yet. He'd always have trouble expressing how much he value his friends, until he shattered the Paradox Prism. (I'd like to think Prime took place before Forces. It makes sense.)
She is such a sweet girl, and he probably made her believe that he didn't care for her. Just because he doesn't feel the same, that doesn't mean he hates her at all.
He wished he never ran away from Amy... Worrying for his little bro and wishing to be a good person for Amy was when Sonic cried in the Death Egg for the first and only time.
Frontiers, in my opinion, is kind of confirming their dynamic now. Sonic is a lot more sincere and kinder to Amy and she is not all hyperactive and lovey to Sonic. There is probably a real reason for this now.
They are both hiding their feelings from them, and they are both unaware of this. Amy, hiding her mental issues from Sonic, and Sonic, hiding his guilt away from Amy.
None of those things are important now. Sonic is with Amy and Amy is with Sonic. They are here with each other. They can be finally be better for each other now.
They don't care if they'll ever be something more when they get older. None of that matters anymore. They are here with each other. They can be finally be better for each other now.
Maybe someday they'll both talk about it, but for now, the present is important. They care about each other too much to think about it right now.
It's the kind of love that is unbreakable. It doesn't even have to be romantic. It's just love. Love is important for everyone, in any form. It's something Sonic and his friends need. And especially Sonic and Amy.
Amy Rose is the living embodiment of love, and without her, a lot would go downhill for Sonic and co. Heck, if it weren't for her, Shadow wouldn't have never remembered Maria's promise, which lead him to save the world with Sonic, before he temporarily disappeared from their lives for a while.
She is always there to lend a helping hand for anybody, even bad guys like Metal Sonic, and despite what she had been through, both in Forces and headcanon wise, she still fights back, even without her hammer.
She will pick you back up on your feet, reminding you that you are important and that you are loved, and that you should never give up. It's pretty much the words of encouragement she herself needed also...
She is still the happy, hyper, butt-kicking hedgehog we all know and love, but she still need someone to pick her back up on her feet after so long. Thankfully, she has her friends and her blue hero. The hero who made her who she is today.
I think Amy has no idea how important she thought she is, but Sonic does. Sonic knows fully well how important she is to a lot of people. It's about time he returns the favor to her. It's his turn to remind her how much a lot of people love her.
How much he loves her.
And I feel like The Murder of Sonic the Hedgehog was the moment where their dynamic really shined, but also the starting point of their relationship not only healing, but also the next chapter of what's to come for them.
Everyone, friends old and new, gathered around for a special birthday. A birthday for the confident, unshakable, and radiant Amy Rose.
It was such a special moment in Amy's life. After years of chasing and following the people she look up to, she is part of the team, but most importantly, she is part of the family.
She is fully realized as someone more than just a fangirl, but someone strong, courageous, creative, kind and a big inspiration for others.
I feel like this moment here...
-is where Amy is eternally grateful to call her friends her family. A family she thought she'll never have again. She's not alone anymore, and as long as they're by her side, she'll never will be again.
Her chasing days are over. She's finally caught up to them. She's finally home.
And it's all thanks to Sonic.
If it weren't for him, she'd probably be alone forever. Her past moments with Sonic might be embarrassing to look back on for a while, but they are good memories regardless, because they involve him.
Sonic saved her life in more ways than one, and despite everything, he's grateful to have her too.
He cares about her. He really does... And in her eyes, that all she needed to know. As long as Sonic loves her in his own way, she'll be happy.
Amy hasn't given up on Sonic. As long as Amy always supports him, he'll be happy.
Maybe sometime in the future, they can talk about their problems, but that's a story for another time. At this point, they need to. Right now, they are happy. They are okay.
They are here for each other. They are finally better for each other now.
"You guys won't ever leave me, right?"
"Wouldn't dream of it."
#piko rambles#sonic the hedgehog#amy rose#Meant to be platonic but I don't care if you tag as ship lol#I've been meaning to post something like this for the longest time now but never really got into posting it-#-because you guys REALLY hate seeing these two together for some reason.#Well not for SOME reason. There are valid reasons why you don't ship them. Everyone has valid reason why they don't ship this or that.#But sometimes those reasons can just sound so petty to me. Like the reason why is because Amy is a stalker or Sonic hates her which is FALS#Also those age gap arguments are understandable but so goddamn annoying sometimes. Maybe when they hit their late teens or early twenties-#then they can be together if they want to. Besides a good percentage of Sonic ships are better off if they waited til they're old enough im#I love them regardless of whether they're just friends or an awkward older cringe fail couple lmao#But them being just friends and hiding away all their emotions towards each other just to keep them safe and happy with them- 😭😭😭#Son/adow is my favorite ship of all time and sonamy is my favorite childhood ship/platonic ship because they both have one thing in common.#ANGST 😀#I've been thinking about Sonic and Amy's dynamic as of late and MAN-#Mixed with some personal headcanons of mine and their dynamic as of late just makes me so emotional.#Sonic and Amy have gotten so close now and it's so sweet but so heartbreaking at the same time when you think about it.#I'm so happy they are getting along better and being there for each other but there is so much to dissect here. So much to think about.#I might be a little silly but Amy losing her parents and being alone for so long and being the reason why she's always hanging onto Sonic-#-explains SOOOOOOOOO much about her. At least that's my headcanon for WHY that is.#Amy with abandonment issues speaks to me on a personal level. I'm always afraid of being forgotten or left behind by my family.#I sometimes feel like I'm not good enough no matter how hard I try. I do not blame Amy. I relate to her a lot. It's one of the many reasons#-why Amy is my favorite character besides Sonic and Shadow.#She fights hard to prove she's a valuable member of the team and hates getting left behind but despite all that she wasn't afraid to-#-express herself and her love for people. But after the Eggman War there was some changes that made her less expressive about her love.#Yeah she still loves Sonic but she doesn't admit it because none of that matters anymore and she thought that not being loved by Sonic#-is better than being loved since she nearly wasted her life loving someone who she thought has constantly bothered. 🥲#But I think after TMoStH I think she'll be less afraid of being expressive about it. She and Sonic are just so caring for each other 😭#I love these two way too much that when I think about them for too long I'll start SOBBING 😭😭 I'M EVEN SOBBING RIGHT NOW LMAO
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I think that people in the fandom trying to overexplain stuff to justify devs' decision to reduce worldstate choices to a mere handful is becoming a bit.. unnecessary
"It's northern Thedas, how many of your previous choices actually matter there?" I'm pretty sure the majority of us do realize it but that's not the point. Sure, we can attribute any mindset to a recurring NPC to not overshare because your Rook is a stranger to them, but I think it's getting a bit ridiculous because again, the logic of it or plausability is not the point... any recurring character in inquisition could've not shared anything about their personal life by that logic but my question is, would that be fun though? Like, the majority of theories or "imagines" or possible explanations I've read sound plausible and make sense, but it's not fun, and it can flatten characters, and it certainly doesn't make it feel like the previous choices matter... in a game series where your choices should matter. Well, some of them.
I get it though, maybe it's some form of damage control/trying to calm people down. The fandom does need to chill a bit plus some people are really going too far (let's not send death threats to devs please), but overall, I think people are just… mourning in a way (or rather processing) and expressing their disappointment, which is fair. I certainly feel that.
#we're not even talking about anything extraordinary. like some lines are not that hard to implement nor do they alienate newer players#i was fine with what dai had to offer and THAT was considered little. now we have even less than that#i'm pretty sure people are still gonna play the game despite that tho. i definitely am#and even if they aren't ... it's okay too alright?#it might sound controversial but i think it's okay for people to be angry and express their anger (again not in form of death threats)#it's a video game sure and it shouldn't be that serious but come on let's not emotionally repress ourselves and do copium too hard#it's never been sunshine and rainbows here and it never will be#dragon age#txttag#da posting#datv critical#bioware critical
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Readin' Bug Ego.
Always glad to see ONE's bromance tendencies in full effect. Saitama and Genos, Mob and Reigen, those two guys from Makai no Ossan...
I've always liked stories about two bosom chums goofing around, and ONE continues to deliver.
#ONE sensei#read Bug Ego#it slaps#bug ego#makai no ossan#one punch man#mob psycho 100#READ BUG EGO#IT SLAPS#unrelated but kokudou kinda looks like a little boy version of tatsumaki#it might just be the hair and the short stature but i could SWEAR their expressions are similar at times too#i'll have to do some research on the matter to see if i can extract some comedy from that coincidence#if it IS a coincidence
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Here I go, speed-translating KUUMAA lyrics instead of working. Just in case lovely peeps who don't speak Finnish wanted to understand the lyrics to the new song that are, once again, disgustingly bojere coded, excuse me.
Behold: Tuhoaisti - KUUMAA (English translation by me)
I want everything, I want your everything Even though I haven’t slept at all It’s the destructive sense that confounds Prevents the ignited from going out
We don’t speak with words We were coded to fall in love in a different way We’re somehow the same and the opposite But no one else has struck through me like this Come through the wall without asking for permission And every cell of mine aches But I want, I want
Yes, I want everything, I want your everything Even though I haven’t slept at all It’s the destructive sense that confounds Prevents the ignited from going out And you’re the exception, the only exception That can make me break down It’s the destructive sense that confounds Prevents the ignited from going out
When you’re not here Your shadow paints my walls I keep the lights on But your voice keeps moaning in my ears And you’ve won It’s no use trying to pretend I’m stronger What I ran from before Now I want it, I want it
Yes, I want everything, I want your everything Even though I haven’t slept at all It’s the destructive sense that confounds Prevents the ignited from going out And you’re the exception, the only exception That can make me break down It’s the destructive sense that confounds Prevents the ignited from going out
Original Finnish lyrics here
#bojere#bojan cvjetićanin#käärijä#kuumaa#tuhoaisti#my brain might just be too bojere coded for its own good#I heard the first lines of the first verse and immediately went 'yes by god another one for the collection thank you johannes'#I took some liberties concerning the expressions but tried to keep it fairly directly translated when it comes to overall meaning#this was very quick and just for funsies so I do not take constructive criticism thank you#also#you can freely use my translation if you like but please let me know if you do and credit accordingly
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okay so now that i’ve officially finished watching leverage i just want to say that maybe i’m obsessed with this show on multiple levels and something about how it hits so many itches in that it’s about found family and it’s about fucking over bad, rich guys (no billionaire bootlicking in this show! and i fucking love it) and it’s also about how sometimes the bad guys are the only good guys you get and it’s also about how we are all stronger together it’s about how at the start of this show, we have all of these characters who are largely used to working alone and being alone and yet the show concludes that ultimately, we are better when we are together and by being together, we might be able to leave something behind that is bigger and brighter for the next people in our generation and no man is an island and no person is meant to beat goliath on their own or whatever
#caroline talks#leverage#not to be like. emotional but.#i am emotional actually!#i'm just. i get emotional thinking about all of the characters#and just how complex they are#nate with his alcoholism and his rage against the world and how he's arrogant and angry and sad and yet i think he cares so much#he cares so much about his team even if he can be a bit of an ass#sophie who adopts a million personas at the blink of an eye and yet has her own loneliness about who actually knows her#parker who keeps herself closed off bc y'know trauma in the foster care system and yet she learns to express herself and trust people#eliot who resigns himself into thinking that he's a monster and yet he starts to do some good and just. winds up protecting everyone in his#new family which. MAN i can't express enough how much that storyline means to me too#like when is a monster not a monster? / oh when you love it or whatever#and then there's hardison who's so incredibly bright and warm and can talk his way out of most situations#and then he hits a wall when all that brightness and wit and intelligence still might not get him out of a scary situation#and that's. that's when he needs people too. that's when he needs his team#and like. there are so many important points in this show#but like one of the ones i like to think about.#is just like. that you could be incredibly good at whatever it is you do#but you need people. you need a team. you need to trust others and together you can do amazing things#individually they're great#but together they're unstoppable and i think about that a lot#no man is an island and it takes a village or whatever!#also unrelated but i also find it a little funny (i'm sorry) that i finished leverage literally the night the implosion news came out
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can I be so open and vulnerable with you guys. the card I was given from people at my old office was sincerely so nice and really validating but also I feel like the main impression I left other people with was "she's really nice" WHICH IS GOOD, I DO WANT TO BE KNOWN AS NICE but also part of me is like... should I maybe strive for "innovative" or "creative" or "a go-getter" because being The Nice One just feels a little mealy-mouthed of me y'know?
#I think there is something to be said here for being so averse to conflict and also such a control freak that I spend incalculable energy on#making other people happy/comfortable/cool-with-me so on and so forth#like this has been a problem in past friendships too as I've grown up#and I've noticed it even online like sometimes I'll have A Take and I won't post it because I don't want to be negative about something#that someone else may like or whatever#which is GOOFY because some of my favorite people are those with strong personalities (bc it's a CLEAR VIEW of that person's personality!!)#and yet here I am like "tee hee I'm so nice everyone likes me because I'm nice anyway when I look in a mirror all i see is a blank wall''#lol y'know? and like no I certainly express opinions and express emotions other than Just Being Happy#and also any waylaid attempts at being so neutral as to not offend people uhhhhh don't work. ask me how I know#(I know because people have hated my guts on the internet before lol)#so it's like: this performance is truly for no one but yourself AND!!!! *AND* it's not even good for you because you might not actually be#being your authentic self#anyways I'm afraid to be a hater and also I'm afraid people won't like me so I try hard to make them like me#and THAT leads to me getting a very nice card about how everyone likes me and me inevitably going: but do they know and like the REAL me#lololololololol that's so goofy#anyway kids be yourselves#also what can I say I derive great pleasure from trying to be the nicest person a cashier interacts with on a given day so#idk there's a middle ground to be struck therein and I'm still navigating it
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alright~ a few updates about everything! so this weekend I'll be seeing changkyun in chicago- so I prolly won't be posting until after I'm alive again from that 😂😅 (I am vv excited about it- I just know I'll be vv tired when I return home). Anyways, I have a few fics in the works~ one of them that is a request 🤭 I'm vv excited to work on them! But I think I'm going to change my masterlist a bit when I come back. I'm going to retire a few groups from the main masterlist and I've been debating for the past year about it... But I think I'm going to add a yearly masterlist- So it would go from most recent to the beginning of this year~
I'm also thinking about changing my pfp- I haven't been really into stray kids for uh... years- But I will be sure to make an update about that if I go thru with that too- (It may be ji changmin next 🫣🤭)
Anyways those are my few updates 🥰💖
#in general my brain is so muddled outside of talking to my three closest and my mom i'm just... fogged- but god how i want to be#writing rn- i have 4 smuts and 1 fluff in the works (who would have guessed my fluff writer self has moved from not only plain fluff to#angst & smut this year? not me- but i'm happy about it) two are poly aus and the other two are about a certain 🌙~#kate rambles on from here#altho there is another vv big potential fic~ but i'm only counting ones i have lots of progress on-#and then the masterlist thing i've been thinking about forever- hwvr again i do not know if i'll have the energy bc i might be knocked#on my ass for another month after this trip (i'll be pretty much solely driving for 4 & 1/2 hrs there and another 4 & 1/2 back the next day#but the pfp thing has been on my mind for a while too- again idk when i'll get around to it but jinkoh has given me a vv good#idea esp for winter~ with mr. ji~ so i'm sure to have changed it by december~ (unless the change is too much for me- i haven't changed it#since 2018... so i'm kind of attached to it- even tho i don't even bias him or stan the group anymore...)#anyways this is full of me rambling- i could really go on tbh- bc i'm really trying to get my mind into gear- but these are my updates#let's see if i fulfill em- i'm bound to fill the fic ones- but the other two... yeah- we'll see-#kate rambles#blog updates#should i bring babydoll q & juyo to the concert bc if it wasn't for kyun getting me into dominic fike(and being into tbz during stealer era#i wouldn't have been a tbz ult... (outside of some other factors i haven't really disclosed) bc atp i'm vv close to packing them with me#i mean tbh a tbz pc was going- but now i'm 🫣: should i bring them to see the guy from my first ult group that caused the spiral-#that made me get into my newest ult group? (i love this butterfly effect more than i could ever express tbh- even tho i express it often)#anyways if someone actually reads these- i'm bound to bring babydoll q- legally that's my buddy- but juyo?? 👀
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Finally finished my cursed idea lol
2 versions of the same shot cos I couldn't decide who should be which one, and then another that I thought fit this duo 🤷♀️
Slapped some backgrounds I found in Google images on them to try to make them feel more complete, idk
I think the last one might be better without the background? I also forgot Angel's hair spots in it 🥲 oh well.
And finally the shots I used.
Btw if you think Cherri's hair looks weird/off as hell in the last one; you're right but also I traced it from one of the last shots of the season finale so 🤷♀️
#hazbin hotel#cherri bomb#cherri bomb hazbin hotel#hazbin hotel cherri bomb#hazbin cherri bomb#angel dust#angel dust hazbin hotel#hazbin hotel angel dust#hazbin angel dust#pony.mov#shed.mov#cherri's hair was a nightmare from shaping to coloring#took me a while to be satisfied with a way to do the gradient in her hair#these are also my first time drawing these two characters#cringe#cringe but free#i might do more#we'll see#maybe helluva boss characters too?#some of the expressions would really fit#my art
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I think relatable and unrelatable stories can be utilized well and are both very valid. I enjoy both of them depending on my mood, but stories that are a right blend of relatability and unrelatability also exists, and those are my personal favorites.
I love stories were I can see bits of myself in the story/characters, while still being different enough that I can still imagine myself in a different pair of shoes.
#personal#me speaks#I remember reading tv tropes where they mentioned that if your stories has zero relatable qualities#u might alienate your audience#and if its too relatable the audience would just feel like they are staring at the mirror#obv nothing wrong if thats what your going for tho#relatable stories are valid bc people tell stories to express their feelings worldview etc#and sometimes its different enough to make me go 'wow I relate to this character but I wonder if I would do the same as them'#on the flipside some unrelatable stories make me go “im different from the character but if I was in their shoes I might do the same thing'#idk both are enjoyable and fresh to me when done right#and whos to say a story cant have a bit of both
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this is also why i stopped using my tracked tag for a while tbh
#and i might do it again bc its just#a reminder that no one rly cares abt what i do / who i am etc#which might sound over dramatic idk how else to describe it tho its just hollow#it feels very much like a Chore and a Task and if i dont reblog things fast enough from my tag#people get very angry and/or upset with me even tho theres just#so much content and i have 0 time so everything gets queued no matter what#like this whole experience feels like a chore lmao#and it never ever used to#but now theres so much animosity if i dont behave / interact with things Properly#or whatever the make believe rules are idk#this dash can just be so negative like have we all truly descended into madness during this hiatus#bc like i get it ive been up and down and all around too but ive never been straight up MEAN to anyone in this community#and i never want to either so this entire situation thats been bubbling for months just feels like shit#bc what the fuck changed and how do we get back to where we were#i never ever ever ever felt this way before like idk the middle of last year#but ever since like last fall its just been idk. Bad#once again im sorry if ive ever done anything to upset anyone but my silence / absence doesnt mean i dont care#ive just been Incredibly busy due to some real life changes that are out of my control#i might not have energy to answer everything but i do Read everything and it does make me smile#and i save messages that are kind in my heart so i can be reminded of the root of what this blog is supposed to be#a space for something im very passionate about and previously had nowhere else to express said passion#so like idk if we all like the same things why does this weird feeling of competition linger over us lmao#why do all ccs have to fight???? each other???? when we all love and do the same things????#i have nothing against anyone personally but what i Do take issue with is the way that ive been doing this since 2021 and im fully just#ignored and shoved aside by so many people for reasons i fully dont know or understand#so yeah idk this is a novel i just woke up from a spontaneous nap bc im so exhausted i can only stay awake for 3 hours at a time#but yeah anyways idk !#be nice its so easy !#tbd
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FOR REAL I GET SO MAD WHEN I SEE POSTS LIKE "eww why are ntsmg fans such weirdos!! They dont deserve to have natsume/tsumugi as their favs!!" Like first of all we're not hurting anybody pls let us LIVE, second of all Have You Seen the Characters in Question. Like if we're freaks then what does that make THEM!??!? If they were real theyd be the freaks ur complaining abt!!! TL;DR natsumugi loser weirdo freaks canon and im here for it. Also that alice natsume is so CUUUUTE
ITS KIND OF ODD TBH ?? like obviously i get that not everyones going to like the same stuff but like. if you dont like characters being weird, why do You then also like ntmg.......? if its someone who doesnt ship them thats complaining then fine whatever but its so weird to me when people who claim to ship them make these complaints bc its like?? then why do you ship them???? do you Only like the bits where the two of them are being sweet to each other? do you only like their angsty backstory? do you only like the comedic relief? i have a hard time grasping the idea of dedicating yourself to a pair or character without loving (or at the very least tolerating) every aspect of them........ have these people read the stories? or are they being deliberately oblivious? i have no idea
it makes me really sad how people are so afraid of being seen as "weird" though. too often that word comes with negative connotations when that doesnt need to be the case at all, and i wish these people would stop living in fear and surrounding themselves with those who judge people based off how Socially Normal (according to a christian society) they are
also i just get annoyed seeing ntmg get watered down to some idealized couple completely stripped from their complexities to better fit what we're taught is Morally Correct (according to puritanical beliefs) or reduced to a comedic duo SHDKJFHD
#some of you people really need to learn to live a little#because not allowing yourself to indulge in what you enjoy or just getting mad at OTHERS for indulging in harmless behaviour#is going to make you miserable#and i really fucking wish this shit wasnt so ingrained in todays people#because such a judgemental and reactionary attitude genuinely is harmful especially towards queer people#but thats a whole other discussion for another day#and as i always say its OKAY to be uncomfortable with things#there are MANYYYYYY ntmg artists who make things that makes me very uncomfortable so i SIMPLY DO NOT ENGAGE!#but to act like ntmg Themselves arent weird ???#and like you cant possibly understand why the fans might indulge in some weird stuff too ??#thats gotta just be projecting on your end atp#ask#btw this is about harmless self-expression and exploration via fiction and not LITERAL CRIMES#just so you fuckers dont go assuming shit because Jesus Christ the second you start being open about accepting weirdness and being weird#people automatically assume the worst shit imaginable which is so fucking insulting to literally every single human being on the planet#this post is about fictional characters being weird and us being allowed to indulge in it#do Not twist my words into Anything else.#EDIT OMG I GOT SO CAUGHT UP IN BEING ANGRY AT STRANGERS ONLINE I FORGOT U COMPLIMENTED ME#THANK U VERY MUCH!!!!! ASJHFKAJSHDG
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ideas: i didn't really think of him being underwater but they deserve to have drama by crying there too so i just think you could say something about the composition being denser than water or w/e. proteins
i'm always like good thing he didn't try to exit asap via swimming in ciao alberto But What If He Did lol. just swim Somewhere else along the coast, maybe panic about [money??] & whether somehow this ruins school for luca, whether he can get in touch w/o it being On Sight b/w him & all marcovaldos, consider just kind of trying out other places, traveling after all...fascinating considering the other povs on the issue like: now there's the paguros to sympathize w/a kid vanishing, luca however in a somewhat more novel position there, giulia's throwback to alberto being a bit perplexing lmao, kind of thinking the best massimo could do is have a prewritten letter for luca to give to alberto If Possible, conveying something like i know you didn't set my livelihood on fire on purpose but even if you did i'd want you to stay. and luca in a position to do all of "maybe give the island fun facts so someone can check if he's there" & "wait & hope alberto can/does get in touch" & "have a lot of feelings"....not even the context of what this drawing is about necessarily, just tacking it on here anyways. ahead of time i went "heh now i Know they're gonna have it get little Real here b/c it's really about alberto wanting the security of feeling he can 'earn' a sustained relationship" then the short cleared & i was lying completely dead on the pavement
#luca 2021#pixar luca#alberto scorfano#love when like ''yeah ofc you Could guess approx what would happen; b/c of The Themes & things following them''#but then like of course it still manages to Surprise. feels apt when like ppl doing some savvy media analysis can Guess along w/the film#like oh we're gonna fight here we might have our secret revealed here yep. then get caught off guard by alberto but 110% surprised by luca#even as ofc it all makes sense & is cohesive w/those Themes that have been unfolding; not just breaking w/the material to Surprise us#but still unpredictable. the whole movie being so vignettey (god bless. i live) allowing for a lot of that too like just Stuff Can Happen#someone can guess alberto's dad is not in the picture really but you could think oh he's been killed by humans. No lol...#or massimo lost an arm to sea monsters. but no. oh my god & this is how i realize i didn't draw alberto's arm scar hang on lol#okay there it is. here we go gays (me turning in for some rest at 8:15 am)#oh i read this picture book in the internet archive abt like A Parent Expressing Unconditional Love via conversation w/a child. hang on#''even if i did something awful'' by barbara shook hazen; i did think of it here. let me obtain a quote for effect...#[but what if i did something really truly awful?] [like what?] [like playing ball in the living room after you told me not to & breaking#the vase daddy gave you for your birthday even if i didn't mean to & it was an accident? would you still love me then?]#[i love you so much i'd love you if you Did mean to & it wasn't an accident. / but i might also be mad & yell things like 'i've told you a#thousand times!' & 'this is the last straw!' & 'i've had it with your disobeying!' & send you to your room with no dessert... / ...& cry a#little & pick up the pieces.] [i'll help.] [but i still love you no matter what; no matter how mad; no matter how awful. & i always will.]#so long as it's commitment to Actual support which; massimo already On That even before realizing like oh bereft And you're of the sea.....
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#personal#it feels like im not allowed to complain about my own life on my own blog#or at least that if im allowed to that it seems very firstworld problem very selfish very not appropriate with all thats going on#that people will and do think less of me for expressing my own sadness and frustrations because theres no way it compares#to a lot of peoples very big and very real problems#but im so fucking sick of being poor and small. all ive had to eat today is 2min noodles roughly 10 hours ago#and all ill get tomorrow is a bowl of 2min noodles but ittl be another 15 or so hours until its the most reasonable to eat that#thats the real girlmath and then thats the last of my noodles. that leaves me with one (1) small tin of tuna#which might end up being tonights intermediary food if i really cant wait 15 nore hours for my next noodles but is supposed to be#the one meal of the day after tomorrow. so if i eat it too soon then i have even more time that i just dont fucking eat#im so sick to death of being in this position. like its literally killing me and theres fuck all i can do to make it better#ive tried. and i try and i try and i try but i can never afford anything#my landagent keeps sending me textx asking when theyll see a patment for my $50 water bill#i have to stop myself from texting back every time. youll see payment when im not spending literally 75% of my pay on rent alone#when i can afford to buy food and bills at the same time. whn i dont feel like kms-ing would be better than paying you my rent every frtnite#i crave a burger so bad i cant make myself do any tasks. i cant start or continue any crafts or chores because all im thinking about#is a burger like a blorbo rotating in my mind alongside the background noise that i wont get a burger and will only get noodles but not for#hours. a whole days worth of hours almost#my shitawful roomate is back and i have to play nice but he gives me the same feelings my abusive mother did. im scared to leave my room#in the safeplace house ive spent the last two years building for myself. this feels awful. things were all going so right and now#all of a sudden theyre all going as wrong as possible and im struggling so much. with no one to help. no one cares enough to help#the few people i do have are wrapped up in their own lives. which i get. but it doesnt take away the hurt of dealing with it all alone again#lot of momma trauma coming up with the end of eclipse season and i thought i was handling it. now i just feel fucking awful all the time#like ik healing isnt linear but the roomate triggers so hard things i thought i had processed and was on top of#would a burger fix that? no but itd atleast give me something to emotionally lean on for strength though it. but all ive got is noodles#24 hour apart one meal per day noodles. and tomorrow is my last pack. my only solace lately is that ive been invited to my first ever rave#or my first real rave anyway ive only been to one other 'edm event' that was not really a rave of any scale it was like 25 people#but its a halloween rave so im hoping for spooky fun dancetimes at least theres that. im out of data and spotifyprem so i havent been able#to take my silly little mental health walks bc theres zero chance im doing that without music and so itll be noce to get outside fr the rave#anyway. im doing very poorly i appreciate you few who reached out while i wasnt active but i expect ill continue to do poorly for some time
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Found this template and immediately wanted to fill this out for my character Paz!
Paz a winged humanoid shapeshifter called an aremsian (which are often referred to in-world as angels), and Paz has an dangerous fascination for deities, otherworldly entities, and the combination of magic and engineering to access other realms... which ultimately resulted in their best friend's soul being swept away to another realm. Paz worked as a "supervillain" for a bit to gather supplies to rescue him, but now is currently mostly doing freelance work or work for a circus of strange minor deities in-roleplay.
#I feel like I definitely channeled some of Paz's energy into how I draw Loop--especially as a human .... same sorts of expressions and stuff#it's just the tired rude celestial drama dorks vibe I guess#I might fill this meme out with other OCs also! Feel free to suggest characters you'd like to see and I might get to it#we.. shall see. I have too many things I should be doing but brain says nah#so time to fill out some pages I suppose!#my OCs#Compass Roses#Wenqosi#Paz#Catastro#memes#OC memes
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remember when it was the norm on here that if someone said they wanted to kill themselves, people would try to convince them not to and anything other than doing that was seen as fucked and wrong by default no matter what?
yeah.... i miss that
#personally i try to keep that energy going. but ppl are too scared to express their pain on here anymore bc some of yall normalized#being waste of space fuckshit bully ass mf's w no life#and im not entirely unconvinced it isnt alt right 4channers fault- tho it could just as well be because this site has become more hostile &#vitriolic bc ppl decided their political leanings give them license to kill and that naturally lowers your empathy and fucks for others#its so sad how this site has tumbled down (no pun intended) from being a haven for weirdos to being just like any other normie site#where people suck in all the same ways they do everywhere else#like thanks we brought and allowed bullies over here..... if my eyes could roll anymore they'd go into the back of my head.#everyones just so mean spirited and irony poisoned and its such a boring thing to decide is your personality#wow cool you're nihilistic and insufferable to be around. gonna go look for different ppl to be around now idk what you expected#might be an in group/out group kind of thing. whereas 'unless you're a Perfect Pure Progressive Of The Lord Who Is Unsinning#then you dont DESERVE sympathy for your suicidal ideation' *said in the most pompous way possible*
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