#i meant the cowboy one

[delusionalbitchinthehouse]

I'm on a roll with AU these days, so. Cowboy AU ! Outlaw Dewdrop x Sheriff Swiss...with a twist.

It's been a long fucking day. Very fucking long. Swiss' back aches as he leans back into his seat, blinking when the lines of barely legible handwritting still swim in front of his eyes, even now that he's looked up from all the paperwork.

Yawning, he looks around his office, lazily blinking. A light breeze brushes his face, making him frown and glance at the half opened window. Hadn't he closed it ? Swiss tries to recall, hours blending together in his memory. Maybe he didn't, maybe he forgot.

Once he's locked it, Swiss snatches his hat, delibarating between popping to the saloon or just staying home.

"Be the sheriff, they said, it'll be fun, they said," he grumbles, making his way downstairs, "they just forgot to mention the fucking paperwork."

It's all fake complaints, though. No matter how much paperwork makes him want to hang himself sometimes, Swiss loves this town, loves taking care of it, protecting it, acting for the people that make it such a bright and homely place.

Plus, he rocks the hat he was gifted when he became sheriff. That thing is probably his most prized possession.

Once in the kitchen, Swiss makes a beeline for the nearest bottle, in dire need of a little something to clear the fog in his brain from answering letters, approving or denying demands and signing what needed to be signed for hours.

The bottle leaves the shelf too easily, snatched with too much strenght for its weight. Swiss frowns, looking down at the bottle. It's three quarters empty, which doesn't sit right with him. He's sure, absolutely certain he left it more full than this.

All at once, Swiss becomes keenly aware of his surroundings, his senses sharpening in an instant. Noticing things he hasn't prior.

The rim of the bottle is still wet, a stray drop clinging to the neck, not having had time to reach the bottom. A glass is missing on the shelf. The memory of the window he thought he had closed flashes back in Swiss' mind.

His hand flies to his holster just as the distinct sound of someone cocking their gun breaks the silent, followed by a voice.

"Touch that gun and i'll have to scrub your brains off the floor," it says.

Swiss freezes, slowly raising his hands on either sides of his head. He hears steps, then a hand relieves him of both the guns he carries, as well as the knife hidden in his boot - quite the predictable place to keep it, Swiss will admit.

"Turn around," the voice orders then.

Swiss does, half smiling.

"Very rude way of starting a conversation, don't you think ?"

"Who says I want to talk ?"

Swiss groans as he takes in the man facing him. Long hair, mismatched eyes, sharp features, a scar tugging the right corner of his mouth up in a perpetual smirk ; a familiar face, one plastered on every available wall of every town.

Dewdrop, wanted for a baffling amount of crimes Swiss can't be bothered to remember, dead or alive. Reward : Swiss can't remember that either, with how often it changes.

The outlaw amongst the outlaws.

Swiss raises an eyebrow.

"Well, you see, people love chatting with me, so I just assumed you were as dying to hear my voice as the others."

Dewdrop scoffs, though he's smiling, a thin, sharp thing that reminds him of a blade. The fucker is holding a glass of Swiss' liquor in the hand not gripping the gun.

"Sorry to disapoint, sheriff, but if i had the time to sew your mouth shut, I would."

Swiss tilts his head.

"Rude. Almost as much as drinking my stash away."

Dewdrop downs his glass, maintaining eye contact the whole time, carelessly setting it on the nerby table with a satisfied smack of lips.

"You have enough liquor to drown in it, I'm sure my share won't be missed."

Swiss almost doesn't catch the quick way Dewdrop's eyes rake over him, up and down and up again, pausing momentarily at the silver of belly exposed by his raised arms. Almost.

"What I do miss are my guns," Swiss huffs, eyeing where they've been unceremoniously shoved under Dewdrop's belt. The outlaw takes one out, examinating it with an approving hum : they're very nice guns, well-cared for. Then he puts it back, still at his own belt.

"You'll miss a lot more once i'm done."

Swiss' eyebrows climb up his forehead ; there is a vague innuendo to be made, he thinks, but between the tiredness still weighting on his shoulders and the way his eyes keep stubbornly falling on Dewdrop's lips, he can't find a way to phrase it. Instead, he props his hip against the end of the table opposite to the one Dewdrop stands at.

"So you, a famous outlaw, master of escapism, came to this...tiny town and decided to ransack the sheriff's house ? You won't find nearly as much as you're used to."

The look Dewdrop gives him then, feels like being flayed open, exposed raw to prying, piercing eyes. It takes all of Swiss' carefully crafted self-control not to flinch away from it. When Dewdrop takes a step toward him, he can't help but tense, smile less easy, more strained.

"Oh but you see, sheriff, i pride myself in being nosy. Some might say it's a flaw, I say it's a very useful thing. I have keen ears, you see. I hear a lot, and I love rumors."

The barel of Dewdrop's gun presses against Swiss' chest. The outlaw is fully grinning now.

"And, you see, people say the Multi-Faced Thief - you know the Multi-Faced Thief, don't you sheriff ?- didn't die in that trainwreck years ago. Some say he's still alive, mascarading as a simple civilian, maybe even a figure of authority, hoarding the goods he stole, or aquired thanks to his thievery. "

Swiss swallows, his smile widening. Dewdrop is clever, ruthless, ambitious. He can't help liking it. There's no point in bullshitting him, but Swiss decides he can't give in without fucking with him a bit.

"And why are you telling me that ?"

All the air leaves the room when Dewdrop leans forward, so close his nose almost brushes Swiss'. It's crooked, Swiss notices, the bridge a bit wonky, probably broken once or twice. His fingers twitch above his head with the sudden and irrational need to touch it.

Swiss can barely breath, waiting, Dewdrop's eyes flickering over his face, searching. Pausing on his plush lips for half a second too long.

"I think you know why. You've gone soft, Multi. It was easy sneaking in. Disarming you."

A chuckle escapes Swiss as he drops the act, entertained by this guy's audacity. His confidence. Instead of shying away from the gun, he weights against it, sure to leave a dent in his skin. His eyes darken in the dim light ; oxygen can barely find both their lungs in what tiny sliver of space there's left between their faces.

"I'll admit, I dropped my guard. Didn't expect a pretty thing like you to stumble into my house. Try to steal from me. If we'd met a few years ago, I would either have put a bullet between your eyes or taken you for a ride."

Up close, Swiss is at the front row to see Dewdrop's pupils expand, his chest rising and falling quickly. Despite that, he doesn't lose sight of his objective, something Swiss admires quietly as he's shoved a few inches back by the push of the gun.

"Yeah, well. Here you are today, distracted and gunless."

Swiss nochalently raises his, mirroring Dewdrop's position, barrel against his narrow ribcage.

"You were saying ? Looks like I'm not the only one who's losing focus, mmh ?"

He watches in amusement Dewdrop's cheeks clolouring with both anger and embarrassement, his mismatched eyes flicking down to his belt, where only one of Swiss' guns is left.

"So, we're in a bit of a dead end, but i'll make you a deal, yeah ? You leave, and you leave fast, without doing this town any damages. In exchange, i'll let you have this," Swiss drawls, slipping a hand under his collar to tug on a richly ornemented pendant, one that always stays concealed under layers.

Dewdrop's jaw falls open at the sight of the Multi-Faced Thief's most famous prize, the hold-up of the century. Swiss waits for his answer, grinning, watching rubies reflecting in wide eyes.

"Why...would you offer that ?" Dewdrop manages to choke out, stunned.

Swiss laughs lightly, slipping the jewlery off his neck and onto Dewdrop's, still not letting go of it, precious metal digging in his palm.

"I'm tired of carrying this old thing around, and i'm already plenty rich. Do we have a deal ?"

Greed is always a bad influence, Swiss would know. It's currently shining in Dewdrop's eyes, surely thrumming in his veins. But he's not stupid, either.

"Right. And the real reason....?"

Huffing, Swiss yanks on the pendant, grinning from ear to ear.

"The real reason, is that i'll have a good excuse to hunt you down. I'll get this back. I'll catch you. I've missed the thrill of the chase."

It's not much of deal, more like a threat, or maybe a promise, but it's clear by the look on Dewdrop's face that he's game. Incapable of resisting the challenge.

"If you think you're up to it, it'll be my pleasure to prove you wrong, sheriff. It's a deal."

Swiss let go. They're still holding each other at gunpoint.

"My weapons, or you're not walking through the door," he warns.

"Windows would do," Dewdrop snarks back, though he does toss Swiss' second gun and knife on the table. His eyes flick up to Swiss' hat, hand twitching.

"Unless you intend to take me up on the ridding offer, I suggest you don't take that. You know the rule," Swiss smirks, earning an eye roll.

"Not tonight," Dewdrop breathes, slowly backing up toward the window, still aiming at Swiss' chest.

He's halfway through it when Swiss calls back.

"I'll see you soon, Dew."

The outlaw throws him a daring look, scarred cheek pulling with how wide he smiles, and it's the last thing Swiss sees before he jumps off.

Alone in his kitchen, Swiss laughs.

This will be fun.

[formulanni]

🐎‼️

Tag list: @st-leclerc @rubywingsracing @saviour-of-lord @three-days-time @the-wall-is-my-goal @albonoooo @ch3rubd0lls @brawngp2009

[abaroo]

Previous/Next

Cowboy Swap Masterpost

[frwalkwithme]

"Dust is dancing in the space A dog and bird are far away The sun comes up and down each day"

[playlist]

[honibumii]

Happy late bday to him /and me/

[rynli]

he looks so dumb, god bless

[sketchy-tour]

HELP I DIDNT REALIZE I ACCIDENTLY ADDED "What hurts the most" TO MY HOUSE OF LEAVES PLAYLIST ITS SO OUT OF PLACE RASCAL FLATTS WHAT ARE YOU DOING IM MY HOUSE!?!?!?

[agirlking]

On the back of; ‘42!Miles was always meant to be Spider-Man and you can see the 42 spider going to bite him before The Spot yanked it to our Miles dimension.’ I propose that is the original anomaly that started all this. Miguel said it’s our Miles being bitten (and I’ve seen others propose maybe Miguel isn’t meant to be 2099 but I don’t think that’s a good direction to go and I hope they don’t, Miguel’s not the real villain here, he’s an antagonist).

But I think it’s because Earth 42 has no Spider-Person at all, not because our Miles became Spider-Man or 42!Miles became Prowler, they just swapped fates, not a huge change all things considered. It’s the fact 42 has no symbol of hope, that’s why the entire city is in such a state, that’s the anomaly.

[doctorwhoisadhd]

this was NOT written by an american lmaoooo "thick midwestern accent" im gonna sound like a usamerican for a second but... i dont think that a midwestern accent CAN be "thick".

[ihavetoomuchhomeworkforthis]

so today my mom decided to take us on a hike, and my brother and I were walking much farther ahead talking about whatever, and I learned something which I continue to be shocked at and now must tell you.

He was walking slightly farther ahead of me, and I thought I heard him say "Stolas." He did say Stolas. He was talking about the character from Helluva Boss. He has watched every episode of Helluva Boss at least once. He has also seen the entire pilot of Hazbin Hotel.

This child is NOT EVEN A MIDDLE SCHOOLER YET.

[rjavenuru]

Since I posted Voltaire in hats I thought I'd have to show mine off as well. 😝 Enjoy the poser! 🤣

[angels-heap]

I’ve been seeing a lot of interesting Barney Calhoun fanon and discussion in the wild lately and I’d like to take a moment to reflect on the evolution of fanon Barney over the last 15 or so years. I spent most of that time lurking and I’m sure I missed some iterations, but I distinctly remember alcoholic Cockblock Calhoun, whose only roles in fanworks were binge drinking and being obnoxious about Gordon and Alyx getting it on. And then we had traumatized smol bean Barney. And Uncle Barney (with a side of weird infantilization of Alyx). And “I didn’t play Half Life and I don’t care to but anyway here’s benrey... 2!” And let us not forget one-dimensional southern cowboy Barney.

We as a fandom really love mischaracterizing the shit out of this poor guy.

This post doesn’t really have a point. I just think the whole thing is neat. I’m sure all of these interpretations could be mapped onto other fandom/media/world events and attitudes and perhaps one day someone with more time on their hands will do just that. I would read that essay.

[beachesgetpeaches]

there have been random rumours about Pedro Pascal leaving The Mandalorian and I just

1) I wouldn't be quick to trust these + we'll find out when we need to find out.

2) Do not think they would let him go shoot TLOU, accommodate him so he doesn't even have to be on set, then write him out idk.

But ALSO imagine if they did. At this point, reading people's comments (and btw the fandom is key here bcs I promise you casual viewers don't consistently attribute to a show's popularity)... anyway, it kind of seems like it would be them shooting themselves in the leg. Because from what I've seen lots of people are still watching for Din and Grogu. And lots of people are still connecting to Din (and Grogu??) from our viewer side.

And honestly same goes for me so far.

I'm not saying I don't care about other characters at all, like it's cool to see Bo-Katan be a badass and all. And the rest of the Mandalorians are interesting to get to know. But the show has not made me connect with them. Bo was present briefly (kinda) in S2, with no selfless motives btw, and then my next view of her is clearly her downfall (which we haven't been shown, but told so eh I can't care much), which is supposed to be her low point before her inevitable come back. I have not yet connected with her "cause as a character", I don't quite get why I should be rooting for her. Hell, I care more about Greef Karga and the development of Nevarro at this point because over the seasons I've grown to like him as a character and respect what he is doing for his home.

Anyway, imo not having Din would cost the show a lot especially since this season still seems to be failing at having people connect with any other character other than Din.

[autism-swagger]

I think I was meant to be a capybara

[rebloggingrexan]

#the plants at my old elementary hit different bruh /lh

INGESTED not just chewed on to clarify lol. based on real responses from my groupchat

[dunmertitty]

texas is funny. this one time a guy(in his truck) yelled at me(outside)(in summer) for wearing a cowboy hat(to provide shade)(while working)(in the sun) while i was working in the garden (in summer)(in texas)(on a sunny day)

sorry i’m a #FakeCowboy for wearing a cowboy hat(in the summer)(in the sun)(while working)(in a garden) instead of wearing my cowboy hat(meant for working)(in the sun) while driving a truck(air-conditioned) like a #RealCowboy who does Manly Work (with his truck)(spotless)(unblemished)(with AC)