#i mean ig since it's like??? she's a concept from it i should???
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👉👈 so @silverskye13 i saw this and..............
had to make an aron helsmet!!!!!! this was really hecking fun to think about actually like what she'd be like n design (which. is a poke at the rp server she was from actually) and also made me sit down and think more on my other minecraft ocs i have sittin around and why they ended up getting redesigns lkdsfh BUT YEAH i!!!!!!!! aron!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
#what do i. tag this as. sdklfjslk#i mean ig since it's like??? she's a concept from it i should???#redstone and skulk#aron#nora#<-- adding in that tag now that she's named#a lotta the stuff aron goes through in her character arc in the rps has to do with like. she has her stuff that she's comfortable doing#and stuff that she's not#and after trying and trying and trying to go outside her comfort zone and help ppl around her in a Better Way#feels like she's just not good at it and should give up and go back to what she was doing before#-only to find out through A Lot Of Events that no she actually was learning even tho she didn't realize it and she was getting better#and she was actually helping#and also. it was. kind of impossible for her to go back anyway. jlsdf.#sO i thought her helsmet would be more of the 'stick with what i know and don't leave that' kinda thing!!!#leaning into her minecraft roots; she was originally a redstoner/demolitionist (i mean she's still a demo but)#so her helsmet would- if following that idea- be Really Hecking Good at redstone#but only stick to redstone bc No I'm Not Trying Anything Else#also aron had a lot of problems trusting people she shouldn't and it really bit her back so there's that aspect too!!!#...also is it just me or does this pic feel very Camish like i don't know what it is about the style bc i tried smth different#and when i finished i looked at it and went 'huh. this looks like camish drew it.'#I WILL ALSO!! make more!! of my other minecrafters!!! i just underestimated how much thought i would be putting into making helsmets sdlkfj#but they are bouncing around in my brain!!! and i will draw them once i can get them to stay still long enough to realize what they are!!!
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( reaction ) failing no nut november ! ୨୧ 一 라이즈 ՞
⸃ ⸰ ⌁ would they fail no nut november ヾ
boyfriend!riize・ reader g ・ smut cw ・mentions of sex, a little bit of degradation wc ・ 0.9k | click to library
request. if you have your req open could you consider this! either a reaction or like short drabbles ig but the concept is: riizes reaction to u making them fail no nut november/ or trying to make riize fail no nut november
「 ୨୧ authors note 」 i hope this is what you wanted...<3
﹙ 𐙚 : shotaro﹚ .ᐟ
he would definitely give up if you asked him to, the moment you bat those pretty eyelashes he's gone. “what can i do for you baby.” he smiled , but from the look in your eyes he could already tell what you wanted. “i need you.” that's all he needs before he's like ‘the hell with this challenge.’ picking you up taking you back to your room and laying you down. “you need me baby?” his hands finding his way to your clothed slit, rubbing circles on your clit. “y-yes.” he chuckled. “so cute baby.” your sweet cunt soaking his fingers. “don't worry baby.” the challenge no longer on his mind.
“no need to beg i'll fuck you the way you need me to.”
﹙ 𐙚 : eunseok﹚ .ᐟ
eunseok won't give in, he's not gonna give you what you want, no matter how much you beg him. “eunseok please.” you followed behind him. “what's the point of this stupid challenge?” you desperately pleaded with your partner. “don't you want to fuck me.” his silence pissed you off. “fine i’ll just go handle it myself.” he didn't like that at all. “go ahead and you won't cum at all in december.” he warned. “go ahead and touch what's mines, i dare you.” you whined, turning back to your room, still needy for your man's touch. “so mean.” you mumbled under your breath.
“keep talking back and you won't cum until january.”
﹙ 𐙚 : sungchan﹚ .ᐟ
he'll give in— after he's done fucking with you, he loves teasing you but in the end he'll give you what you want. “baby it's just a month, you can't go a month without me fucking you?” he smirked , you rolled your eyes. “please if you weren't doing this to piss me off you wouldn't be able to go a month.” he chuckled. “whoa baby , that's big talk for someone who wants to be fucked , maybe we should see if we both can last until december.” your entire attitude changed making him smirk condescendingly. “i like this attitude better, now get on your knees.” you followed his orders, getting down on your knees. “good girl.”
“i don't give a fuck about this challenge i just want a excuse to fuck the attitude out of you.”
﹙ 𐙚 : wonbin﹚ .ᐟ
he wouldn't give in simply to fuck with you. wonbin is a fucking tease and loves to see you struggle, it turns him on to see it — if anything it motivates him to finish until the end. “wonbin you know you don't give a fuck about this stupid challenge.” you rolled your eyes in annoyance. “it been almost a month since you fucked me.” he smirked. “you keeping track of the days sweetheart?” you wanted to slap him but that wouldn't get you anywhere. “why can't you just fuck me.” he laughed, mocking you further. “because you need to practice self control baby you're begging for dick right now.”
“don't worry i'll fuck you when this is all over.”
﹙ 𐙚 : seunghan﹚ .ᐟ
he’d give in simply because he can't not give you what you want. your his baby; and you're practically begging for him to fuck you… so he has to give his baby what she wants. he can participate next year , you needed him. “hannie please.” you begged into your boyfriend's ear. “i want you so fucking bad.” he smiled at you, cradling your face in his hands. “language princess.” you whined. “this game is stupid.” you sighed in frustration. “please just give up.” that's all he needed. “fine princess , be a good girl and lay down.” you were quick to undress yourself laying back , waiting for your man. “so pretty and desperate.” he said, now undressed. “so spoiled.” he climbed on top of you.
“always needy for my cock.”
﹙ 𐙚 : sohee﹚ .ᐟ
he's failing because he's not participating; number one munch here isn't gonna give up eating your sweet cunt for a let , let alone not fucking you for an entire month. you had to be the one to try and encourage him to go at least a month — it's last not even a full day. “sohee this is not how this works.” you try and push the boy currently in between your thighs away. he whined out like you cut him. “what do you mean i can't eat you out?” he questioned. “that's the whole point , not cumming.” you said. “well you don't have to cum , just let me taste you.” you pushed him away again, he cried out. “you have to wait a month.” he moved your hands , holding them down as he gave your cunt a lick. “fuck hee.” you moaned. “see that challenge is stupid.” he said.
“just let me make you cum on my tongue.”
﹙ 𐙚 : anton﹚ .ᐟ
he'll last a week or two before he can't take it anymore; his need for you overruling any stupid challenge. “anton you wanted to do this challenge.” he hated when you brought it his grave mistake. “it's only a few more weeks.” he whined , wrapping his arms around you, his obvious hard on pressed against you. “baby please, it's just a stupid challenge with the hyungs , they don't even have to know.” he kissed the inside of your neck. “please don't ignore me, I'm so fucking hard.” he groaned, feeling you up trying to rile you up. “anton.” you sighed. “see you want this too.” his hands came up to your boobs. “we don't even have a to tell them.”
“just let me fuck you , please baby.”
©LUVYENI
#kpop x reader#kpop smut#riize smut#riize hard hours#riize hard thoughts#riize x imagine#riize headcanons#riize x reader#shotaro smut#shotaro x reader#eunseok smut#eunseok x reader#sungchan x reader#sungchan smut#wonbin smut#wonbin x reader#sohee smut#sohee x reader#anton x reader#anton smut#seunghan smut#seunghan x reader
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Hi! I wanted to ask a question and I wasn’t sure if it was too personal or not so just ignore this is you’d rather not answer, but I was wondering if you went to art school or got a degree in it? I really want to start learning and maybe one day start a career in animation and wasn’t sure whether I should spend time and resources getting a degree. I know it’s going to be different for everybody and nothings a guarantee for this field but since I love your style and technical skill I was curious whether you had done that and what were your thoughts on it or if you are self-taught.
Hey anon! No worries it's all good!
Ig I should quickly go through my art journey so you can have an overall look of why I went to art school lol.
So I'm from Vietnam. I think back in 2013 I went to a small art school in Singapore (they were the only one that gave me a scholarship). My major was 3D modeling actually, but during my final year, I realized I only wanted to draw characters for animation. I could already draw decently, so I just read The Silver Way book and built a character design portfolio on my own during this time. I was lucky I got a job as a concept artist at a small animation studio there so I learned a lot from the job. I also did a lot of self-learning and took Woulter Tulp's Expressive Character class on Schoolism.
Then after 3-ish years of working, I got sick of the tiny and dying animation industry in Singapore. I wanna do sth more than just preschool shows and I was severely underpaid lmao. So I quit my job and took the MA VisDev program at AAU. It's a little more affordable cuz u can do 1 year online and the second year on-site. The reason I went to this school even tho i could just take a VisDev class online was cuz i need the visa so i can try to break into the industry in the US.
Now back to your question. Is art school a must? No. Should you still take it? Maybe, depends on your situation. If you can afford it then hell yeah by all means. Art school is great cuz you have professors and peers to help guide you along the way so you won't get lost while trying to figure out your shit. And to have a few years just experimenting and focusing on art is a great experience. Plus you can make a lot of meaningful connections in school and it will help you a long way after you grad. But if you have to go into debt to go to art school, then don't. There are places like Schoolism, CGMA, and Warrior Art Camp where you can pick what class and from whom you wanna learn. If you are not from the US and wanna break into the industry here like me however, then yeah getting a degree is a better bet cuz you can use the student visa and OPT to hopefully get a job here (it's still very very hard tho ngl im struggling rn as we speak lmao). Also, you need a BA to work overseas so there's that too. The hard truth is studios prefer to hire locally than some rando from somewhere else and have to wait for them to relocate and shit, (unless you are exceptionally good and they'd do anything to have you, but that is super rare lol).
Even though I did go to art school, I have to say most of my skills are from self-study. It requires a lot of self-discipline but I'm pretty much obsessed with drawing and I draw everyday so it's not a problem for me. But my friend is not good at that, so she found art school/classes helped her better cuz there are deadlines and instructors to help guide her to reach her goal. So it depends on your learning style tbh.
There is this chart that can help you consider your options. Im sorry it's a very long answer, cuz yes everyone's experience is different. Feel free to drop me another ask if you still have anymore questions tho ^^
Edit: I must also add, though there are online classes and ways to self-learn animation,I do think it only truly benefit you if you know exactly what you wanna do in this industry (for example I already knew i wanna become a character designer for 2d/3D animation specifically so any books/classes i took I tailored it to fit my goal). If you are unsure what you wanna do, then maybe even a cheap animation course will do better, and then you can take extra online classes on the side.
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Decided to post some more random, mostly minor characters from the DC universe, mostly ones that seemed they would be fun to draw. I guess technically these drawings are all based in my TrWh au, as always. Here they are:
Wanted to draw heroes with wings, I draw Vanessa quite a bit so I had to learn wings and feathers. Still working on it, but its fun. You can see Vanessa there at the bottom middle, looking a little menacing.
The girl with red wings is called...Redwing aka Carrie Levine. I thought she was a sweet kid, so her ultimate fate was pretty sad. Wonder if she'll come back to continuity at some point.
The guy with the mohawk is Northwind aka Norda Cantrell, part of Infinity Inc the earth 2 version of a Teen Titans group. He honestly didn't get a whole lot of focus in Infinity Inc, like the writer didn't know what to do with him. Maybe they should've made him into the magic fighter of the group, almost felt like thats what they were going for him before they wrote him off.
The girl in yellow is Dawnstar, part of the Legion of Superheroes. I haven't read much of LoSH, mostly some 90's issues. But her design is soooo pretty I had to draw her, her costume here is a mix of her various outfits.
Lastly, here's Bluejay aka Jay Abrams again, part of Justice League Europe. Kinda thought JLE was a bit of a letdown, I mean the team's made up of mostly americans not europeans! I think Crimson Fox was the only european, I thought her set-up of being two people was cool.
Little extra Infinity doodle, here's Hector Hall (Silver Scarab) hating on poor Norda, with Lyta Trevor (Fury) looking on with confusion. Hector's just a hater (tho there's reasons for it ig), an archetype you see sometimes in some superhero groups, like Roy Harper or Guy Gardner. The plot-line of Hector's resentment of Norda was kinda interesting, but like with most things in Infinity it didn't get the focus it should've gotten. Speaking of Infinity, here's some more doodles:
There's Rex Tyler (Hourman 1) with little Rick Tyler (Hourman 2), enjoying some father-son time. Apparently Rick's first costume isn't well liked (so says reddit). I thought it seemed cute but maybe it works better as a kid's or sidekick's kinda costume?
In the middle is Jack Knight (Starman) suffering as he interacts with Sylvester Pemberton (Skyman, formerly the Star-Spangled Kid) and Courtney Whitmore (Stargirl, actually she should still be S-SK but whatever). In my au he actually joins Infinity Inc, since everyone becomes heroes earlier he's actually around when the team's still running. I suspect his dad (Ted Knight) forced him into it. Also Courtney doesn't respect Jack at all, he's so annoyed at this. Look at her mini-staff, I presume Ted made it for her.
Also there's Beth Chapel (Dr. Mid-Nite) and Jesse Chambers (Jesse Quick) looking cool. Jesse also joins Infinity Inc in my au, will there be a love triangle going on between Beth, Rick and Jesse? Don't think Rick's gonna survive that, aw well.
Look at baby Jade and Obsidian, Alan is overwhelmed by their antics.
In another post someone asked if I could draw more of the Relative Heroes, a super obscure hero group. So @draculaura1660, this one's for you. Here they are:
I kinda had a hard time drawing this group, cuz their costumes are so complicated! I wished there was a reference/concept art for them cuz it was a struggle trying to figure out the details, the comic art did not help matters at all. You might have noticed I changed details anyways, I tend to simplify costumes for my au both to make it easier to draw and also to signify their younger ages. It's just fun to play around with costume design ig.
Some more characters!
Jinx, who looks very different between her comic and cartoon self. I did like her pink hair, so decide to see how it would look on her comic self. There's Kole, who also has different designs in comic/cartoons. I think her comic costume is so cool, esp that color pallet! But I love her pink hair in the cartoon, so she's got pink hair here! Just like pink hair a lot lol.
The other pink haired girl is Laethwen, love interest of Ray Palmer in Sword of the Atom. I think I made her hair more pink to better differentiate her from Starfire, also, again I just like pink hair. I wished she and her little kingdom didn't die, in my au Ray saves them! Maybe he relocates them to his backyard or something?
Little Donna and Vanessa doodle, did you know they never once interacted on panel? The closest is when Donna brings her stepsister Cindy to talk to Vanessa instead. I wonder how they would even interact, I know Vanessa wanted to be wonder girl (and resented Cassie for 'taking' it from her). Did she look up to Donna, or wanted her out of the way? Funnily enough Donna wasn't even Diana's sidekick when post-crisis started, due to both their origins being reworked and contradicting each other's timelines. It's all very confusing.
Anyways, some bonus doodles:
Had fun making a new outfit for Laethwen, I imagine she took some inspiration from indigenous groups from the Amazon, seeing as that's where her people crashed into.
Kole's costume is just so beautiful but so complicated, maybe that's why she got killed off so soon in Crisis on Infinite Earths.
Lastly, here's Bette bugging Dick with Barbara being super amused about it. I said in my post about her that I didn't really care about her crush on Robin, which is true, but I still wanted to doodle something making fun of it. Poor Dick is doesn't know how to get outta of this social situation.
Well that was a lot, hope you liked all that.
#DC Comics#Carrie Levine#Norda Cantrell#Dawnstar#Jay Abrams#Vanessa Kapatelis#Hector Hall#Lyta Trevor#Rex Tyler#Rick Tyler#Beth Chapel#Jesse Chambers#Jack Knight#Courtney Whitmore#Jade#Obsidian#Alan Scott#Joel Aaron Weinberg#Aviva Joby Weinberg#Damara Sinclaire#Tyson Gilford#Cameron Begay#Jinx#Laethwen#Ray Palmer#Donna Troy#Kole#Bette Kane#Dick Grayson#Barabra Gordon
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Yeah!! Please rank the spirit dresses!
LETS GOOOOOOO
ok ok ill try to not ramble too much but this will def be long lol
im not perfect by any means and these r just my opinions so idk don't kill me ig, if u disagree u can say that but be polite
10. OK so in LAST PLACE WE HAVE
CAPRICORN!
ok put down ur pitch forks and let me talk-
its not a BAD design aesthetically or in concept, I've seen ppl say its kinda leaning into a like, spy vibe or something and I really like the sunglasses and horns!
BUT capricorn never read as a spy to me?? maybe its just me but he always came off as more of a butler parody especially w the tailcoat he gets in this screenshot
i think both capricorn and the stardress suffer from not having a very visually distinct concept so when put together its barely feels like they match at all, its its v clear that putting lucy in a skimpy dress took priority over making a cool design that connected to the story
i dont even love my redesign for this dress anymore bc I feel like I just need to redo Capricorn first to give him a stronger concept then deal w the dress later
OK
9.
AQUARIUS
this is blasphemy i know but PLEASE HEAR ME OUT
this one is way more personal preferance so if u disagree that's so chill there's just too many things w this dress that bother me
I hate the hair, i really do like grown women w pigtails is already a pet peeve of mine bc its so male gazy to me but combining that with the bikini top and super short skirt just annoys me
and let me say again THERES NOTHING WRONG WITH LIKING THIS but in the larger context of this being the AQUARIUS dress it just doesn't read like her at all!! Sure she has a bikini but she also has v ling hair!
where capricorn suffers from too little visual concept aquarius has so much of it!! The gold to me reads v fancy and royalty esque which makes sense for her personality, just changing the hair to something more like what aquarius has would do wonders I feel like
plus i hate the green-
my first redesign ever was this dress bc it annoyed me soooo much
ANYWAY-
8.
VIRGO
this fit is fine, just boring
but virgos design is also boring and the one interesting thing, her chains, NOT being part of the star dress or alluded to makes me angry
also pigtails so it loses points
NEXT
7.
ARIES
again its fine but its boring, mainly bc aries' design is also boring so-
idk i wish they went more bo peep with it cuz I feel like that could have been cute
also more fucking pigtails-
6.
TAURUS
if any fit deserved to have horns its this one TAURUS IS A BULL-
anyway this fits is also fine but damn they could have gone so much harder w the cowgirl thing
i do still stand by my redesign for this stardress bc I think it fits canon without redoing taurus
she should have a nose ring its just facts-
5.
GEMINI
love the concept and idea! kinda meh execution
its fine ig but its also like gemini don't look anything like this? which makes this another one were I feel ud have to rework gemini to give them more visual cues u could take
the headdress specfically confuses me since the wiki says its a Kokoshnik but after looking at the wiki for that I found nothing in the history that makes that make sense for this fit?? like concept wise??
its only so high up bc i respect that they did something different and creative with this dress and the way they split the colors on the dress itself is cute, just wish they went more magician or even jester w it
the only pigtails im kinda ok w bc symmetry
(when i say more magician i did it this way:
4.
SCORPIO
its cute, i wish the tail was bigger and I see v little reason for the fit to be skin tight when scorpio himself literally has a half skirt thing going on
i still like this so here, as u can see I liked the idea with the hair and headband combo I just wish they had pushed it further
3.
SAGITTARIUS
again, cool concept, weird execution?
this one is the only one i feel that THRIVES from not taking any visual cues from the spirit bc honestly his design just sucks I'm sorry ik its supposed to be funny but its just stupid to me idk
however even if i like thaty they did something different AND gave her the bow and arrow, it annoys me still that nothing about the fit reads equestrian or archery? there's SO MANY historical fits they could have used as inspo for this and they just chose not to and that's lazy to me idk
also also i hate that for a while bc of the way the manga was colored it looked like she was fully just wearing underwear bc of the white fabric with nothing on her thighs like that's dumb he's a horse u WANT something there to protect that area when riding
2.
LEO
its cute, it matched loke design AND personality wise, wish there were more lion elements but overall v cute
CANCER
i already talked abt my thoughts on this dress here so yeits just good AND the pigtails r ok bc they r meant to mimic cancers silhouette which I really like
summary:
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Yeah, I sent that message to Bry because she was the only one posting about these anons attacking you guys...as far as I'm concerned. I haven't been here in a while.
I don't really wanna private message anyone. Sophie can privately message you if she so desires.
Further, as far as Sophie and I discussed, like yeah...you guys just had different styles of sharing ideas. Sure we can all get butthurt sometimes. But, it wasn't anything personal, ultimately, a social media tiff lol. I imagine that post is deleted?
Does it really matter anymore? Do you expect Sophie to still be raging by a tiff?
Im not gonna say anymore, it's none of my business. But the anons sending so much hate: you guys need to stop and go within. Sophie wouldn't want this for y'all. Its deplorable behavior...her and ada are gone, rely on yourself...
[neutral but more confused tone]
I'm not sure what you discussed with her but dming me and agreeing about the "there is no ego, this post is limited" story on Instagram that was meant in a neutral way but then going to tumblr, switching and saying "you're speaking from the ego, i'm so disappointed, you sound jealous of her" and making it sound like I'm attacking Ada which I originally never did within 1-2hours which resulted in her devouted deciples living in my ask box since the very start of this account to now and never saying anything about it and sendings asks anonymously about topics only she could knew about from our IG dms which were personal, doesn't sound very "different styles of sharing ideas & nothing personal" to me. How can I be jealous of someone I don't know? I asked afterwards on IG who Ada is and people told me. That's the thing that confuses me here. How can I speak from something that doesn't exist fundamentally? They talked about ND/AV but contradicted themselves with ego-related posts and concepts. Pointing that out is not an attack. I never attacked Ada, I never even knew her to begin with but Sophie's reblog was the catalyst of everything else that followed to this day that blew everything out of proportion. She knew I wasn't attacking her because that's what I said in the audio back then on IG. Disagreeing with someone does not mean attacking them. She knew her followers were camping in our inbox (not just this account) for months and stayed silent and now says it wasn't anything actually? After she (Sophie) left for a reason her anons didn't know, people started blaming Chen for it and no one said a thing. A follower on IG sent me a message asking what my opinion of this post is, i replied and AFTER i found out it's from tumblr, i made an account too. Another thing is, I don't fully understand why you operate as a middleman for her. You said in Bry's message that Anons should stop speaking for her, but aren't you speaking for her or in her name anonymously too? I'm not angry, just confused as to what exactly she told you and why it clashes with the actual situation and the reactions of it
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Unsure why Dump is insisting I didn't tell him Blurry is a character. Jay didn't know we blocked each other. Once Jay found out, she stopped responding to Dump as Jim too. Crazy concept, that. Respect.
Granted, I was extremely high and struggling to apologize for mistaking Dump for a rp blog. I would never purposefully harass a real person.
i'm only posting this because no one has ever asked if we had DID before. not until we told john about our dissociative disorder, though at the time we weren't diagnosed yet. we said we because there's just two of us modding the account, but also we said "we" when referring to us and the character, too. since this all happened dump has shown they don't have a great grasp on what DID is, so excuse their constant confusion on the subject.
other general confusion should be excused too because i had a stroke trying to read that too. but also yeah, i didn't realize at first, though some people are okay talking to me if they don't want to talk to kin. i get sad because i don't know what YOU DID SOMETIMES but it's not like i'm much better than you. there are people that don't like me but like kin too. then there's people that want nothing to do with either, and uh, i mean that's fine too.
i would like to point out that not wanting to be friends with someone because they're in a system is usually fine, if someone in the system is problematic or has dome something. (reminder that from their perspective i messaged them to slur them and then "act ignorant". of course they don't like me lol ) i love and appreciate my friends who is apparently 1 person in multiple coats (even though i'm the one who introduced them lol ) and love that they want to support and defend me, but i do find it beneficial to ignore people. it's lovely to want to educate them, but remember it's not your job. john was never interested in learning about DID and it's best to let him throw his tantrum over there, and if dump wants to learn they can too. i just don't think they are lol best to leave them to it ig but thank you ily.
and thank you (to general people kin is not supportive of me ever LOL ) for well wishes after john "doxed" me, i'm not sure why he did that still, because it doesn't add to the conversation. kin and i don't really talk about it on our mains nor would we really have to when i made a mod account to talk about it on. i don't keep them hidden because i have something to hide, i just didn't mention them because they were irrelevant? just like john saying kin and jay are the same person, i think he's just deflecting. ignore it lol thanks
#mod#jay#a scandal in tumblr#uwu#i miss the boops#bring the bop back#i delete my blogs every year or so for a fresh start and only just did it again this january#but the boops made me stop from deleting yesterday lol#(i just like my privacy )#so now i'll be stuck here forever because i'm not getting rid of my BOOPS#<3 <3 <3#i love them so much they are so cute#paw paw paw
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Two Hearts (finale): e.w x reader
warnings: none! calm chapter completely wholesome but kind of short ig?
writer’s note: this will be the last chapter. this is not intense so do not expect anything !! and sorry if it took so long.. when i say i’m busy with uni, i am. NOT PROOFREAD!
part 1- part 2 - part 3 - part 4 - part 5 - part 6 - part 7
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Love is a confusing thing. Not everyone is blessed enough to feel this concept. You have always thought that you were incapable of doing so, that you weren't worthy. 'Cause all you felt in this life that you have lived was nothing but rejection which made you dense to the feeling of Love. And you knew, that Ellie was the same. You both were looking for the same thing. And it felt so good that you both were able to provide it for each other.
"In this life I have done nothing but love you." Ellie whispered.
The denial that was evident throughout was just a decoy for the intense love that couldn't be displayed. You both were cowards. You didn't accept the risk of losing someone who you spent your whole life with just because you loved them more than a friend should love another. Love is a confusing thing. You hoped to God that it would change for the better.
It did. It seemed like the whole world revolved around you and her only. You were deprived of love, Ellie knew that. Ever since you were a child you have done nothing but try to get the constant approval of your parents. You had done nothing but try to achieve the academic goals or even the career goals for no one but them and them only. The love that was lacking throughout your life, was provided by Ellie. And the love that was lacking through hers, were provided by you.
You were going to meet up with Joel, you had just put on something casual as the planned set-up would only be in a café. You decided to not outdone yourselves because you wanted the ambiance to be just perfect to announce you and Ellie’s relationship. To be completely honest, you were a nervous wreck. And Ellie didn’t seem to get that at all. But, the things that ran through your mind was just “what if he doesn’t like me for Ellie?” or “what if he thinks that i’m too full of myself?”
You gulped as you blankly stared at the mirror, your gaze travelling up and down your body as you were so unsure of how presentable you wanted to be. “You’re fine.” Ellie broke the silence as she stood behind you, her arms crossed. “Why are you so nervous? You’ve been with Joel ever since we were 5.” Ellie asked as she looked at you in to the mirror. “I don’t know. What if he doesn’t like me for you? I mean I wasn’t the best child at all, he always scolded me when we would play in the backyard and- what if hejustdoesntlikemeforyoubecauseimnotthegirlwhoheseesyouwith?” You rambled as your hands went their ways through the air as Ellie stared at you dumbfoundedly. Is that even a word? It’s probably possible ‘cause that’s the way Ellie’s feeling right now.
“You’re doing too much, seriously.” Ellie laughed as she stepped closer to you to hug you from behind. “You’re going to be okay. Like I said, you’ve known him your whole life.” You sighed at the reassurance as you melted under her embrace. You nodded as you accepted your “faith”.
A few hours later, you and Ellie had arrived to the café. You both got out the car, laughing as you both noticed that your breaths both hitched. You looked at eachother as Ellie pointed at the window, you followed her direction and saw Joel sitting quietly at the booth, reading a newspaper and sipping a cup of coffee. He never changed. You thought.
You and Ellie walked in the café hand in hand as you both walked up to Joel. “Hey..” Ellie said almost whispering as she caught Joel’s attention. “Hey kiddo. Oh have I missed ya.” Joel claimed giving Ellie an excited shit-eating grin. He stood up as he gave Ellie a tight hug, ruffling her hair in the process. “Fuck- JOEL!” Ellie groaned as they both laughed.
You stood there, admiring the two as your heart melted. You wished that you could feel like that again, but the last time you ever felt that way was when you were 8 years old. “Hey Y/n.” Joel said as he walked up to you and gave you a fast and soft hug. You always were awkward with eachother. “Hey Joel” You said giving him a soft smile. Ellie snorted, catching you and Joel’s attention. “Come on, you guys.” Ellie said patting the empty space beside her. You looked at Joel and he nodded giving you the empty spot next to Ellie’s as he sat in front of you both.
“Look, Joel. A lot has happened this past few months or years and i’m really happy to see you but… I have to tell you something.” Ellie said straightforwardly gripping at your hand under the table. “Throw it at me, kiddo.” Joel said as he smiled and leaned back against the booth couch. “Me and Y/n are together.” you all went silent as you looked at Ellie and Joel. It went quiet as it seemed like they were both trying to win a staring contest. Not until the silence was broken by Joel’s laughter. “Kiddo, that’s nothing new to me! I thought you both were already together before I left the goddamn country.” Joel said as he snorted laughing too hard at Ellie’s face. You observed Ellie as she had her mouth agape and staring blankly at Joel. “Oh, fuck you.” Ellie spat as they both laughed. “I’m happy for y’all. Really.” Joel reassured as he looked at you. “I never knew you had it in ya.” You blushed in embarassment as you gripped at Ellie’s arm. She chuckled and kicked Joel’s foot. “Sorry, sorry.. I was just sayin’ “
“It must be hard for ya, since ya know.. your parents.” Joel spoke hesitantly as he tried to look for any expressions on your face that were a sign of discomfort. There weren’t any. “I moved out a couple of years ago and I haven’t contacted them since.” You smiled as you fiddled with your hands. “That must’ve felt horrible, i’m so sorry to have brought it up kiddo.” Joel smiled.
“I think you’re great for Ellie. Really.” Your eyes widened as you realized the contradiction of what you had just said earlier and snapped your gaze directly at Ellie’s. Ellie smirked and gave you a look telling you “I told you so”.
“I have seen none in this life that I saw better for Ellie.” You softly smiled as you looked at Joel, waiting for him to continue his sentence. “I know that I might have not made you feel like I liked you, especially when you were a kid. But I know that no one made Ellie happier than you. I know you’re a great person, y/n.”
“And I know that ya might not have felt like you’ve been accepted. But i’m always here to also stand as your father. Ya know that right? I’m not always showy. Even Ellie knows that.” Ellie chuckled as she nodded. “Just know that i’ve always treated you as my own, babygirl.” Joel nodded as he reached for your hand. Tightly gripping it. “Oh, come on now. Don’t be a sap.” Ellie interrupted as you all shared laughters again.
“I am genuinely happy though.” Joel nodded as he both looked at you and Ellie. “You both are perfect for eachother.”
After the meeting, you felt euphoric. You were so glad that Joel loved you. But then again, there were no reason for him not to. Your behavior when you were a child was nothing compared to now, he admired your growth as a person and you knew that you would influence Ellie greatly.
“I love you.” Ellie blurted out. You looked at her with a confused look.
“I love you too. What’s wrong?” You chuckled as you seemed taken aback by the sudden exchange of iloveyou’s.
“I don’t know. I just felt like I haven’t said that enough.” Ellie looked down at her feet, fiddling with her hands. You frowned as you took a step close to Ellie, pulling her in to your embrace. “I just feel like I have wasted all these years in my life being a coward instead of feeling your touch and love like how i’m doing right now.”
You sighed as you cupped Ellie’s cheeks. “It’s not only you to blame you know? I was dumb too.” You laughed as you felt Ellie’s body soften with your touch.
You were in that verge too. You wanted to blame yourself for not accepting yourself sooner but you were still glad that you did anyway. You were happy that even though in the most darkest times… Like the times that you would ignore her because you were jealous or because you just didn’t want to talk to her because you were having another one of your crisis. She was still there. And it was selfish, you knew that. But you were glad that she was still there for you to claim as yours.
You could’ve never found that love for Xavier. He was just one of your facades that you had to escape to find the true happiness within. It was Ellie. And it will always forever be Ellie.
In this society, Lesbians have been nothing but fetishized. Always stereotyped to the point that you were scared of the oppression you had to face.
And that’s the thing you have always been scared of, society. It always seemed like it was you vs. 7 billion people in this world. But the truth is? you’re not alone. And in fact, you’ll never be.
You wish you could’ve just been like Ellie, she came out as a free woman without giving a fuck. And she always had that fighting spirit within that you wish you could achieve. But you knew deep inside that she was also struggling as much as you.
If loving you wasn’t considered as a sin, I would’ve loved you to my full potential.
If loving you wasn’t a part of being condemned, I would’ve married you and took you to the aisle of my favorite church and prayed that we would be eternal.
If loving you wasn’t wrong, I would’ve realized that it was you all along. And I wouldn’t have to be with someone that I knew I didn’t want.
I’ve lived with two hearts, the other one was loving you and the other one was pretending that I didn’t.
#ellie williams tlou#ellie williams#ellie tlou#ellie x reader#the last of us#ellie x fem reader#ellie x y/n#lesbian#female reader#tlou#lgbtqia#tloufic#tlou2#tlou fanfiction
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(un)Worthy
Pairing: Sketchbook (Kaisa/Johanna)
Summary: “Johanna bit down everything she wanted to say, seeing red in a way that didn’t allow her to notice the challenge in Kaisa’s voice as she called her her best friend. No, that certainly wouldn’t do. Her Kaisa, going out with someone who couldn’t keep from lashing out at others because of her own emotional turmoil? Someone that was so clearly only interested in her aloof persona, since she never got close and that was all that people who didn’t talk to her could ever see?
Her Kaisa, telling herself that a mediocre relationship was fine, that this was the best she could ever get, because somehow that was how that wonderful girl’s brain always worked?
No, Johanna could not let that stand.”
Notes: uuhh so I couldn’t stop thinking about this concept and it escalated. Happy pride ig, have some gays (also this is an AU in which Kaisa and Johanna are friends as teens and Kaisa+Frida are Tildy’s daughters. So, you know, sketchbook bread and butter)
Read it on ao3
It happened while they were doing their homework together.
They always did that, ever since they had crossed the line from being just classmates who would greet each other politely in the corridors to actually friends, when they were thirteen. It had been years, but they never stopped. There had never been any need to, not when they seemed to work so well together. Two brains were better than one, after all.
They were at the park near Johanna’s house that day. Each time, one of them would pick where they would go, and while Kaisa preferred to stick to the library or to their houses, Johanna had always been one to try and get them to switch things up, insisting that a change in atmosphere would help them think. Kaisa would never have the heart to tell her no, of course, even if going to places such as the beach to work on their school chores felt a little too unorthodox for her tastes. But she supposed she should, as her friend put it, live a little.
Johanna hadn’t failed to notice how Kaisa had been sneaking uncertain glances at her since the morning, sometimes going so far as to open her mouth to say something before quickly snapping it shut. She didn’t press her; at this point, she knew her friend would speak whatever was on her mind when she was ready. When she did, however, it became clear that it was Johanna who wasn’t ready for what she had to say.
“Abigail asked me out today”
And just like that, the algebra worksheet on Johanna’s lap became so irrelevant it might as well not exist. She whipped her gaze to her friend, who was eyeing her expectantly and with a little caution, carefully gauging for a reaction.
”What?” Her voice came out harsher than she would have liked, so she continued without a pause lest Kaisa have any time to think that her discontent was aimed at her. “The snobbish fake blond who has picked on you since, like, eighth grade?”
Kaisa’s suffering sigh was enough of an answer. Johanna’s hands came to the earth underneath her, grounding, making her concentrate on the feeling of it and not on the mental image of Kaisa on a date with Abigail.
Fucking Abigail.
“So that’s a ‘no’, then.”
Her friend wasn’t looking at her. Rather, lying with her belly down on the towel they had brought and with her chin propped up on her hands, Kaisa seemed to examine Johanna’s stance: the sudden rigidness, the legs bent at the knees that she had drawn closer to herself, the hands gripping the soil. The scrutiny made Johanna feel like she was under a magnifying glass, and it was one of those moments in which she was forced to remember that, although Kaisa wasn’t exactly perceptive, spending years of your life tied at the hip to someone will be enough to get you to know them quite well. And Kaisa had all her patterns memorised like they were the lines to her favourite song.
Johanna’s only hope was that she hadn’t learned to read her mind just yet.
“What do you mean?”
“Well, she came to talk to me before History.” Kaisa said, still not looking at her face. “Said that she wanted to apologise, that her borderline bullying had always been because she was enamoured by me and couldn’t admit to herself that she liked girls… something of the sort. And then she asked me for a fresh start and a date. I told her I had to think it through and I’d get to her. What I really wanted to know was your opinion on the matter. You’re my best friend, after all, I value your opinion.”
Johanna bit down everything she wanted to say, seeing red in a way that didn’t allow her to notice the challenge in Kaisa’s voice as she called her her best friend. No, that certainly wouldn’t do. Her Kaisa, going out with someone who couldn’t keep from lashing out at others because of her own emotional turmoil? Someone that was so clearly only interested in her aloof persona, since she never got close and that was all that people who didn’t talk to her could ever see?
Her Kaisa, telling herself that a mediocre relationship was fine, that this was the best she could ever get, because somehow that was how that wonderful girl’s brain always worked?
No, Johanna could not let that stand. And, well, she probably shouldn’t let thinking of Kaisa as ‘hers’ stand either, but it had become instinct long ago and Johanna had simply lost the energy to fight it.
“It’s not a ‘no’. If it’s me you’re asking, it’s a hell no. I only trust that one as far as I can throw her.”
Kaisa’s stifled laughter came out as a snort. Between the two of them, Johanna had always been the ‘nice’ one. The ‘respect is a given, disrespect must be earned’ one. The one people went to when they needed comforting and not a reality check. So this situation was funny, of course, not only because it was so out of character for her, but also because it was so in line with what her mother had told her would happen that Kaisa might just begin to believe the rumours in the neighbourhood saying that Tildy was a witch.
“You know, at some point you’re going to have to approve of someone that I might have a chance with.”
“Listen, it’s not my fault none of the names you brought me have been worthy of you so far!”
Uncharacteristically, Kaisa brought her gaze directly to Johanna’s eyes, in a way that Johanna could very clearly see the amusement in hers. She squirmed against the tree she was sitting back against. This was normal, right? She couldn’t suspect anything just because Johanna was being a good, protective friend, right?
Even if it stung that that was all she could treat her as.
“What about Adeline?” There it was, Johanna knew that that would come back to bite her in the future. “You can’t deny she’s very nice, but you still weren’t pleased when she wanted to take me to prom.”
Looking away at the children playing tag in the distance, Johanna forced herself not to let those memories out of the “DO NOT OPEN” box at the back of her mind, having been filed as way too dangerous and scary to be contemplated on. The last thing she needed right now was to listen to the soundtrack of her heart breaking as Kaisa so happily announced she’d finally been asked to prom by someone two years ago. When they went together every year.
“I said I was sorry about that! It was immature, sure, but sue me for not being pleased about the person I always go to these things with going with someone else!” She crossed her arms over her chest, still refusing to look back at her.
“You didn’t see me complaining that time you went with Gerda.”
Well, almost every year.
You could have, Johanna thought morosely, missing how amused Kaisa sounded.You could have and I would have dropped it to go with you.
The Gerda thing had been a disaster. She was a good girl, too good to have had to deal with Johanna’s mess. And too smart as well. In the end, she broke up with Johanna after just a few months, because she had realised way before Johanna herself did that their relationship was only Johanna trying to convince herself that she wasn’t in love with her best friend. Which was, of course, a lie.
Gerda was still one of her closest friends, and the only one who knew (or at least, the only one who had been told point-blank, because she had had the nerve to actually ask) of Johanna’s true feelings towards Kaisa.
“Well, that’s because someone has to be the emotionally mature one here, Kai!”
“And you’re expecting it to be me? That’s a disaster, Anna”
Johanna snorted. It really was essential for survival that they remain together, because if either of them had to bear the weight of being truly mentally sound by themselves, they’d crash and burn in a week.
Or, you know, maybe they’d be way more intelligent on their own. She would never forget the day she’d been playfully flirting with Kaisa, who had been giggling and returning the quips (because that was something besties did, damnit), only for Raven, who had been sitting at their table, to exchange glances with Alfred and tell him “Wow, their brain cell count subtracts when they’re together.”
“Well then.” Kaisa spoke up again, lifting herself up so she could sit on her heels in front of Johanna. “Let me try to understand your point of view. Is Juniper worthy?”
Johanna blinked, and her face contorted into a frown almost immediately as she looked at Kaisa. Unfortunately, Kaisa’s expression was deadpan. The girl meant business, which would probably mean Johanna would have to insult her entire class in the next five minutes.
“No. She’s like Abigail, but hides that fact behind a smile. She’s fake, which makes her worse.”
“Hm. What about the other Abigail, from Geography?”
“Sure, if you want to be cheated on. No.”
Johanna tried not to think about how she felt more than slightly threatened by the idea of miss ‘coolest girl in school’ taking an interest in Kaisa. There was a smile tugging at Kaisa’s lip by now, but she was trying valiantly to not let it show. Good. They both knew she wasn’t being fair, and even Kaisa could put two and two together. At least she had that much sympathy for the spot she was putting Johanna in.
“Alright. Agnes?”
“The heck? No.”
“Trylla?”
Johanna pretended to think for a few moments.
“She comes closer. But no.”
“Victoria?”
At her friend’s scowl, Kaisa’s heart picked up pace. Her mother and sister had been trying for so long to convince her of what was right in front of her eyes, but she had never allowed herself to believe. Even now, it seemed too good to be true. It seemed too bold to try, like she could send the best friendship in her life to its grave. And yet, Johanna was hardly leaving much room for doubt.
Which was a feat, since there was nothing Kaisa was quite as well versed in as second guessing and questioning herself.
“The two of you are way too similar in some ways and way too different in others, Kaisa. Plus, you know Birgitta would come in the package.”
Johanna startled when Kaisa manoeuvred herself closer to her, so that Kaisa’s knees were on the ground just in front of her feet. Her smile was visible now, as was the blush in Johanna’s cheekbones.
“Birgitta?”
“Like I said, Victoria comes free in the package. And you’d kill each other within the week, and I don’t think Birgitta would appreciate the mess.”
Kaisa rose on her knees, placing her hands on top of Johanna’s kneecaps and making her gulp as she did so. Johanna looked up at her face like a cornered animal, sure that she could hear her heart beating like a bad marching band. Sure that she could see her staring at the way Kaisa was biting her lip uncertainly.
“And you?” She said, her voice so low that it felt like she was afraid of Johanna hearing. “Would you be worthy?”
Her breath caught on her throat, hands clenching. Kaisa looked down at her no longer with amusement, but in all seriousness, her face a silent plea. It wasn’t a plea for the answer she wanted, though. It was a plea for the honest answer, a plea to let them out of this vicious circle of trying to find something in other people and feeling their hearts screaming when the other did the same.
How could she not comply?
“No. I still wouldn’t.” She whispered. “But I’m afraid I’d be very pleased.”
Kaisa smiled, and leaned down to give them the kiss they’d been looking for this whole time.
#fic: unworthy#my fic#sketchbook ship#sketchbook ship hilda#sketchbook ship fanfic#kaisa hilda fanfic#johanna hilda fanfic#sketchbook ship jealousy
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I mean, I blocked her after learning about how awful she was from numerous posts with evidence. So, I'm good there. I didn't bring up her racism to "shame you". You wanted to know who the bigots were that I mentioned so I gave a specific answer and a lil info in case just a name wasn't good enough. When I said I don't care that she's trans I meant, I'm not about to overlook her shit behavior just because she's trans like others do. I obviously mentioned her being trans because that's all she, you, and the rest talk about whenever she's being called out or criticized for something. You guys make it impossible to not mention it.
I only bothered to leave a message in the first place because of the bullying happening from this side. [Not specifically you!]. That person never did what they were accused of, even apologized for the misunderstanding, and txttle & co. still went out of their way to spread the post that had been deleted and act like that op never censored her name in an attempt to avoid any drama in the first place. I don't care for popular people weaponizing their fans like that. But whatever. I'm not trying to convince you to hate her. I'm moving on. I did read the rest of your post and see some of the points you're getting at. And I do apologize for initially telling you to fuck off.
i see, you're right that that was less of a non sequitur than I initially read it as, but I still think its not really relevant to the broader discussion here. bringing up every single past grievance a specific blogger has done (even if you're just bringing it up in your mind) when we're talking about the specific problem of csa being wielded too quickly against people is an example of what I would call uncharitable and unfair.
i won't speak for others, but the reason I brought up transness in this conversation, and think it's relevant to others like it, is because the initial posts that started this particular debate are partially about being trans. when someone says "im trans and i feel that my sexuality is frequently conflated with abuse", and the response is a complete stranger calling that person an abuser, you can see how I might want to explain the effects of transmisogyny while exploring the issue. it's not the only thing I brought up - in fact my post was largely about how even if you do not think you're acting transphobic, that doesn't make it ok to be mean to people anyway. but when you get upset that it was brought into the discussion, and claim it's being used as a "shield" or for "special treatment", you are conflating the concept of speaking up about transmisogyny with lying. this, understandably, will make people want to defend the concept of transmisogyny to you, even if they do not think you specifically care about that part.
i don't really think anyone should be bullied or harassed in general, even if they do something that makes me upset. however, i do think there is a bit of a simplification happening here. i don't believe txttletale or any specific blogger that I've seen speaking on these issues has done anything in this situation besides respond to accusations, and those responses are obviously going to be defending themselves. they may also be angry or upset in nature, since being accused of something awful you didn't do by people you don't know is upsetting to experience.
since making the original post, that person may have apologized but he's also made several posts continuing to make the same accusations again and again, and continuing to say that just because he isn't trying to be transphobic that it's okay. it's not okay. it's also not okay to see other people come to defense of someone and assume that they are only doing it because of some kind of blind trans loyalty, rather than the fact that they're sincerely upset about something that affects their lives too. a lot of people have made posts explaining this extremely earnestly and extremely patiently, and they are almost always taken in bad faith or ignored. the same people have made posts about how nobody listens to them on these issues, and those posts are also used to start drama.
i also sincerely do not believe that txttletale has used her follower count to send haters at this person. she was being talked about by someone to a group of people who all knew who she was and was making fun of her in the notes. she talked about the problem on her blog, because she did not agree with what was being said about her and wanted to correct it. whether or not the original post was deleted, you guys don't get to just decide when it's time for someone to shut up about being called a pedophile in public. if she's still getting hate too, why does the other guy get to keep talking about it but she isn't?
im glad you're letting go, I think it's probably for the best. you say you have her blocked, but youve spent a lot of time talking to me, someone you have repeatedly pointed out might not be sending the hate or might not be the problem, about her. that's an example of what I've been calling an overreaction disproportionate to the problem. you don't like her, so block her and people that talk about her. or blacklist the name. spending time in someone else's inbox, or putting up censored screenshots about a person you hate isn't a good way to deal with that feeling. it's harassment. even if you're not sending it to her, sending it to me where she can obviously see it or posting screenshots of her posts with mean accusations on them is still hurtful and mean and unnecessary for you to do with your time.
thanks for the apology, I understand things get heated but I hope you understand sometimes that means people will respond in a heated manner in return. i appreciate that you were willing to talk to me a little more maturely about this, but I still think you should consider how quickly you jump to conclusions about other people you know. or don't, but idk, don't spend so much energy on hate.
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i read a post saying how we should make true barbiesonas based on the movie concept of each doll being tied to a real-world person and their mindset influencing the doll’s own SO. though p much all the ones i had were movie/princess dolls heres the story of the only generic barbie and ken i had/have <3
Travel Barbie
 i tried finding her in the attic but with no success, she might’ve been donated <:/ either way she was a generic blonde barbie that usually had her hair pulled up/back so it looked cool in her helmet, but i can’t remember what color eyes were so for uniqueness sake imma say she had color shifting hazel eyes ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ (face claim is chloe grace mortez (or sabrina carpenter, ive been a fan of hers for forever but i dont think her eyes or face/body shape match the character so im torn))
yall i had SO many vehicles, the only one i still have is her bike but i also remember a pink car, a little camper van, and a carriage for the princesses ofc
so it only makes sense that her ‘job’ would be traveling/exploring, just making her way across the country through different means and sharing her experiences, maybe through reviews and blogposts maybe through writing and memoirs who knows :p
i’m leaning towards the latter so she can mirror my own love of writing and flowery word choice, just not to an award-winning degree but girl me neither dw
i also want to imbue my creative nature into her so she also loves drawing singing and cooking— painting the sceneries she comes across to capture their vibrancy, vibing along to the radio as she drives or camps out for the night, and making herself tasty pancakes and smoothies and pasta and chili and cupcakes and smores using the limited counter space she has to fuel up and treat herself throughout the course of the day <3
assumedly she would also be rather active/athletic and resourceful, with a decent amount of knowledge regarding mechanics so she could fix any malfunctions while on the road
(this tracks cause my mom has an rv herself and is also handy like that so she would inherit those traits from my mom (her grandma ig?? if you wanna think about it like that lol) which furthers the familial themes of the movie)
also i absolutely ADORED weird barbie’s robot dog so my barbie’s getting a dog too!! a curly haired poodle that loves water and long rides like my irl dog does!! is it real? that’s up to reader interpretation ;)
as mentioned above my main dolls were ones from the animated movies, specifically the diamond castle since it was and is my all time favorite, and i had alexa and liana along with melody and the two other muses
(yall the texture on their grecian dresses was SO nice i remember it to this day—)
(i also had rosella from the island princess movie which was my second favorite)
i don’t know if they’d be in barbie land canonically but i’m not characterizing them here cause they’re… already… characters…
BUT i’m using that to say travel barbie is friends with royalty, and as such is simultaneously fun and friendly while being mature and refined with a princess-y vibe from being surrounded by them so much
maybe cause gloria had skipper’s treehouse as a kid so her barbie lived next to it, my barbie would live next to the diamond castle or sumn afshjdasvdjs
in terms of who she is it makes sense, being well-traveled and getting the chance to meet people from all walks of life, and just clicking with them specifically for no particular reason
but it also works in terms of who I am/was, even when i was super young i was kind and generous and bouncy but a bit more serious and reserved than other kids, it just works so well with how those traits would reflect on my barbie both in and out of universe :))
if she’s still in my possession/house somewhere and connected to me then at the VERY moment shes just generally emotional with an inexplicable love of life and humanity yall im telling you this movie is affecting meeee—
overall tho she’s more mushy like stereotypical barbie, sad and complicated and anxious for no reason at times but still lively and talented and living her best life and working through it all with the help of her friends
i can’t remember if i’ve found her in the past, but man i hope i didn’t have her out for long, that’s how you get “inexplicable thoughts of death barbie” and “highschool dropout barbie” and “why don’t i have a real job why is everyone around me so much more successful barbie” and “feeling inferior and ugly and ashamed and unlovable barbie”
IT’S IN THE PAST YALL I SWEAR IM DOING BETTER I GOT MEDICATED SO WOULD SHE—
super close with psychiatrist barbie nowadays 😂😂
speaking of i saw this meme/image (credit to gmf.designs on ig!!) and the culture of this movie just continues to hit hard, like it fits so perfectly i—
Swim Ken
clean-shaven black boy with sculpted hair and colorful striped swim trunks (faceclaim and bodyclaim is winston duke)
as such his job wouldn’t be just beach like rg!ken but rather swim/swimming, which also extends to pools
is he a good swimmer? beats me 🥴
he likes it that’s all that matters!!
i appropriately don’t remember much about him since i wouldn’t play with him much lmaooo
the only other boy doll i had was the prince from island princess (specifically remember his gorgeous blue jacket and his weird pointy plastic crown band thing), so they would be best friends and as such, he would have a similar elegant/royal vibe about him
aww he probably gets a bunch of ideas on how to woo travel barbie from him
honestly?? idk if theyd be more like margot robbie + ryan gosling or ncuti gatwa + emma mackey in terms of relationship
(ik that one part where they hug and stuff is supposed to be a shoutout to the sex ed fans but i truly think theyre an item vs being just friends, and different barbies have different types of relationships with their kens)
anyway idk what type of relationship they’d have but he’d be super gentlemanly and romantic regardless, true prince material
they probably have a lake in barbieland right? for rowing and fishing and stuff
that’s where they would hang out/meet up the most, still go to the malibu beach ofc but a quiet crystal blue lake fits the vibe better imo
he simultaneously has pool lake and beach vibes JUST ALL THE WATER
#barbie#barbie movie#barbie 2023#barbie spoilers#barbiesona#crying at how long her description is in comparison to his omllll#im not counting this as an oc thing really cause i probably wont revisit it ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
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I think the Chinese myths forbade the union of Gods and Humans make sense since they are entirely of different worlds China also used to have strict ideals and philosophies way back in Ancient times so I think it also influences their mythology, I mean I also heard that in their Myths, Gods have an obsessively strict Divine Hierarchy too, which tied back to their heavy hierarchy in real ancient periods
But it wouldn't make sense here as Vietnamese people came from the union of 2 Gods, hence we have a bit of divinity in each of us despite how everyone is fully human, even though the Age of the Gods' Children is already gone and since the 100 Children of the 2 Creation Gods, who are the Sea Dragon God and Mountain Fairy, were said to have married humans to widen the populace and filled up the lands with people hence the Vietnamese people were born, ig the God blood became dormant through thousands of years mixing with mortal blood
Though this can be an interesting concept as Vietnamese people are also called The Children of the Dragon and The Fairy to speak of their origin as Children of Gods. I think it would be fun to have Characters that are born with the God Blood active inside them hence they're the "Children of the Dragon and the Fairy", they're special as the divinity is active in them whereas everyone else is human since they're empty of such divinity
Sidenote: This might sound rude, but I feel that Erlang Shen might be jealous he was born in the wrong country since in the New Gods movie and I'm assuming the myths too, his family line has a sort of a "Human-God forbidden love" thing going on and in the movie, both his Mother and Sister were executed for it cuz they both have children with human men. I feel like he might feel unfair that in Vietnam, they quite made an entire country because of the unions of Gods' Children and Humans and a Major Mountain God here has a human princess wife for godsake (FYI she has her own mountain peak named after her and a temple right in the Mountain Range which her husband resides at, how romantic). Like bruh what's heavily forbidden in your own kind/culture/country is actually the opposite in another country and everyone there is totally fine with that forbidden thing that caused tragedies to your parents and sibling cuz that's what created them and another one from your kind but in a different land is doing well while committing that forbidden thing, free of punishment, it's quite unfair for Erlang if you ask me, that's why I'm quite suprised knowing that God-Human unions are forbidden in Chinese myths, technically speaking, I am literally a descendant of Gods and no heaven official has a problem with me, well I mean then they would have a problem with a country's population, wouldn't they? Lol Erlang Shen should move here, we're very welcoming here!
The gods in myths defenetly reflect the people that write them(i think that something we can all agree on).
I genuenly need a series of different mythological gods just existing at the same time and causing drama when they find out about each other
Erlang would speed to Vietnam so fast
And Wukong would hide, seeing as at least two pantheons normalize having intercourse with animals
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You say your writing isn't doing it justice but that's so good though?? holy shit Diantha is scary.
Also the tip of the iceberg??? should I be concerned--
That's really good though, really love how that Diantha is more cunning and more secretive than the current villain Diantha one, it makes her all the more terrifying as a villain, especially since everyone in Kalos believes what she tells them. does this mean the other champions don't know whats going on with her? I mean, other than Geeta of course.
Will people eventually find out about her being evil?
My writing really isn't doing it justice tho hahah then again im writing it as how I'd write concepts (bc it is one) and not as an actual fic, but still my writing skills aren't that great anymore ig so like yeah hahaha
Yeah it really is the tip of the iceberg still, Dia's done a lot of fucked up shit my guy, even when she was younger, so yeah it was already a problem since the start. And you're right w that one, how she's more cunning, more hidden, bc unlike the villain Dia we currently have, this Diantha plays the roles anyone expects her to be extremely fucking well, and that's what's terrifying. Bc she knows what you want, she knows she can take it from you too, she plays the part of Kalos' dearest angel, all while treating the people of her region as nothing but pawns, but hey, they don't know that.
And ig it's bc current villain Diantha still justifies what she's doing, because she genuinely believes she's doing the right thing too, like yeah she's controlling, but in her twisted mind she believes she's doing everyone a favour by purging the world of anyone she deems as unworthy, and her being called a queen is just a good bonus too. But initial concept villain Diantha tho?? This bitch knows what she's doing is wrong, but she doesn't care, and frankly she thinks she deserves to use everyone else the same way they used her when she was still a young defenceless child. In her mind, she suffered, so they should suffer too, it's only fair, it's only right, it's her right, her Arceus given right to place judgement unto anyone who even questions her.
And that spiralled out of control, bc she knows just what to say for everyone to listen to her, for everyone to follow her, for everyone to tribute themselves as obedient lambs to sacrifice themselves like the pawns that they are for their queen. And Arc, she fucking loves that feeling of absolute power she has over her people.
For the other champions, ofc they don't know hahah Diantha is still Diantha for them, the same kind and caring Champion of Kalos. The one who was always there for them, who rooted for them, who they were most comfortable to open up to. She's still their angel, and she knows it. Geeta ofc, ever the loyal devotee, her darling king, never told a soul about anything. Ofc, who are they to know what her queen has done anyways right? And even if they do know, they've no right to judge her.
#idt anyone would find out unless they attack her first hahah#and like.. maybe the one who attacked her will also be the only one to find out#whats the point in ruining your cover just to show everyone what youre doing behind closes doors amirite? hahah#but hey yeah hahah#villain diantha au#an ask and an answer#anon
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For the chubby readers thing, this also goes for those fics that are like black! Reader or something idk ig its nice to be inclusive and stuff but when im reading a fic i dont really think about the readers weight or height or race or whatever its not really important but ig people want to be seen or whatever but since some of those traits dont really apply to me i just end up not reading them at all 🥹 thats just my opinion tho
i've always thought about doing this as a black girlie myself, especially since it's very common in the anime fanfic community just like chubby reader is (which is where i get a lot of my inspo from)
I have yet to get an idea on how to write it since i don't want it to be just me pointing it out and being like "hey she's black btw!" sorta thing so it's something I have to think about on how to do. Especialy given how I already was like TERRIFIED to write chubby reader since I am not it myself so i wondered should i be doing it in the first place. I suppose another thing as well is just i don't want to delve into the rabbit hole of "hey write for this race next! write for this other one too!" since I mean race in general is a very western/american concept.
I didn't mean to get this deep so I hope it makes sense but I will think about it!
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anyways i didnt do anything today ive been very. uhh. stuck. but i did think about what it would be like for the godslayers to be plopped into prime, specifically about how they would react to "youre not allowed to kill people".
peter is the most fucking relieved like "oh so we dont have to kill anyone ever???? thats so great" and rumi is cautious but like "hmmm well in 99% of situations if prison works then i dont see any reason we WOULD kill anyone. killing people is not something that should be taken lightly after all."
thanatos is. not enthused. i mean he gets the concept because peter and rumi have been trying to tell him to like. spare people. but he still REALLY thinks they should get to murder people. like. its just the most effective way to get rid of an enemy right? so. why . wouldnt you. he is not going to pretend like it isnt an active effort for him to not kill someone.
exandroth has a whole bundle of mixed up emotions because firsty. he cant KILL anyone??? even the bad guys????? like!! that was his favourite part of retributing!!! what the fuck does he do now?? r u kidding me what bullshit is this. he doesnt think jail is an equivalent punishment at ALL like he thinks if theyre evil then smite them off the face of the earth thats divine judgement baby. but also. he sort of likes seeing others rot away? but also she doesnt because it reminds her of being imprisoned herself?? its weird. exandroth walking through a jail would feel like pulling teeth in a mix of "I WANT TO KILL EVERYONE HERE" "HAHAH THEYRE ROTTING IN JAIL" "BEING IMPRISONED IS... NOT SOMETHING THAT SHOULD BE THIS TAKEN THIS LIGHTLY" exandroth can sort of tolerate it since its not affecting him directly but if there were a question of "we're going to try and imprison someone you care about" exandroth is just going to kill everyone involved no matter what. FUCK prison bitch. no.
but basically, peter and rumi have a much easier time adjusting to prime and the social conventions. except for the concept of i.d probably? i dont think theyd be too happy that there is a constant surveillance and a lack of anonimity that there was back in prevarus. they dont mind following rules but the idea of someone constantly watching over you?? thats really fucked up. even if rumi is a charismatic type that's not the same as consenting to being constantly watched. itd make them freak out.
meanwhile exandroth and thanatos are. theyre sort of adjusting? but not that well. theyre like. murderers. and god slayers. for realsies. like thats built up to be a considerable part of their identity?? they can adjust but letting go of that is difficult.
oh and their views on authority. i think peter and rumi are a bit iffy on it but are like "well... technically it is run by PEOPLE so thats not all bad". exandroth and thanatos are showing sheer disrespect "THESE BITCHES ARE ACTING LIKE THEYRE GODS LOOK AT THESE STATUES THANNY THATS LIKE WORSHIP STATUS WE NEED TO MURDER THEM" and yeah u talk them down from not judt running up and murdering them. but thats not necessarily because they dont WANT to. but because they go "exandroth. if i could compare this situation back when we first met" "UHUH" "..i think these superheroes would, metaphorically, turn us into spiders" "SHIT YOURE RIGHT. WE'RE STILL NOT STRONG ENOUGH FUCK THIS"
ig overall the group isnt like EVIL but they would be considered morally grey more towards the darker tones. theyre just *waiting* for the moment the prime superheroes turn on them and label them villains. not that its their fault. they just wanna change the world for the better. if theyre considered evil for that rhen irs not their problem.
anyways those are my thoughts rn im getting sleeby.
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My fair goalie is a great episode! I like the part where Heinz is sick and Perry puts a blanket over him, and the ‘nostrils’ is funny for a team name. Every part of that episode does seem quite well put together!
Lawrence is incredible in that episode, I think it’s one of the best examples of his personality. He’s very mild-mannered, and he’s willing to let himself lose just so his brother is happy. But he’s also very talented! He just doesn’t show it unless he has a reason to: and Linda asking him to show it is a good reason for him, it’s always nice to see their relationship, it’s wholesome.
The Candace plot of the episode is also really entertaining, the being a lady song gets stuck in my head all the time, it’s really great.
Eliza is an interesting character as well, I kind of wish that she had another episode or two. Her family presumably lives in England, so I think they should have been mentioned whenever the Flynn-Fletchers visited England. Also, she has way too many brothers, lmao.
Professor Ross Eford is also a genius palindrome- I think it’s interesting worldbuilding to introduce a concept like “palindromes were feared in the fifties”. We can see how that old superstition still exists in the modern day, with how that kid realized Ross had a palindrome name and their mother clearly still has some prejudice for palindromes. I think the implications of this would be really interesting! And since palindromes aren’t a controversial topic in the real world, I think that would be a really great opportunity for Phineas and Ferb to tackle the concept of discrimination. It would be really interesting to have an episode where someone has a palindrome name and is bullied and Phineas and Ferb’s big idea of the day could be teaching everyone that it’s okay to have a palindrome name! Buford could be the bully, maybe he learned that palindromes were bad from an older relative, and over the course of the episode he realizes that there’s nothing wrong with palindromes. Also, given that ‘madam’ is a palindrome, it could be interesting to have interactions where an older woman from the fifties is called madam and she gets offended at being called a palindrome.
Let’s not forget Ferb, either! Ferb is great in that episode. Honestly, the ‘curse’ thing could tie into the palindrome superstition in a really interesting way if they’d wanted to go that route, but the ending where the curse is broken and they still lose is also really great. ‘Sometimes you just miss’ is a good moral, because it also serves to debunk superstition. Sometimes you just miss, there doesn’t have to be a supernatural explanation for everything. I also really love the bit at the beginning when Buford comes by and gives Ferb all that American stuff in that big sack. It’s really brilliant! I also like the end credits, when Ferb says he’s not a Brit or a Yank, he’s just Ferb. When I saw that part I was struck by an irrational urge to edit the scene so he was saying that in response to being asked what his gender was.. non-binary Ferb is all powerful, I suppose. But honestly it is a really nice sentiment. That episode goes all in on the American vs British stuff, but that ending takes a step back to remind the audience that it’s all just for fun, and no one actually has to be defined by where they live or where they came from. They can just be!
Also Baljeet screaming in the hat. Need I say more? Hilarious.
SGJIDGJSGIJSGISGJ YEA!!!
EXACTLY LAWRENCE IS SOSOSSOSO PRECIOUSSSSSS ILHSM HIS RELATIONSHIP WITH LINDA IS INDEED SO WHOLESOME
AND SOSOSOSOSO TRUE THAT SONG GOD I LOVE THAT SONG IDK WHY ITS SO GOOD BUT IT ISSS
AND OH MY GOD YOU WOULD NOT BELIEVE THE FANON IVE BUILT UP ABOUT ELIZA SHE IS DEFINITELY ONE OF MY FAVORITE ONE-OFF CHARACTERS (AND ALSO I HAVE PROBABLY THE MOST CRACK SHIPS OF ALL CRACK SHIPS W HER, ELIZA X LACIE. THE LESBIAN POTENTIAL IG)
AND THE PALINDROME LORE IS GOOD YEA BUT I FEEL LIKE W THE CAST THEY'VE GOT FOR THAT(I MEAN, EVEN WOUT THE QUEER UNDERTONES, ISABELLA BALJEET AND STACY(AT THE VERY LEAST!!!) ARE RIGHT THERE) ITD JUST FEEL SHITTY AND PATRONIZING. I JUST DONT THINK THATS HOW THEY SHOULD TACKLE IT WHEN THEY HAVE GENUINE MINORITIES THERE COMPARED TO A GOOD PIECE OF BACKGROUND LORE YA KNOW?
AND FERB IS SOSOSSOSOSSOSOSO WONDERFUL IN THIS EP INDEED!!!! ITD BE A LIL WEIRD IF HE WASNT OBVIOUSLY BUT STILL LOL ENBY FERB REAL
ALSO FOR VERY SPECIFIC REASONS IRVING BEING THE ONE OUT OF EVERYONE TO CONVINCE FERB TO COME BACK MEANS THE WORLD TO ME :)
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