#i may not like certain acronyms but i do still want to learn from and support my fellow queers however possible

[naomiknight-17]

When I first said I didn't like a certain transmisogyny related set of acronyms because they felt exclusionary, I got a lot of negative feedback, and some people insisted that I was being transmisogynistic or even a threat to trans women, and that I need to listen to trans women.

And I thought, okay. People are being really harsh with me right now but maybe I do need to learn more about this.

So I started paying attention to what the trans women on my dash were saying. I read the 'discourse' posts. I followed a couple of blogs that use that language to see what they were all about

On one hand, I did learn a lot about transmisogyny and intersectionality, but on the other hand I saw that the folks using these acronyms do not speak for all trans women. I saw some trans women on my dash directly calling out that terminology for the same reasons I did.

I saw people using that terminology saying exclusionary and transphobic and intersexist things about other trans people and about intersex people.

So in the end, my opinion has not changed.

I am trying to listen to trans women, but they don't always all agree. And I think I agree with the ones who don't like that language

[warsamongthestars]

A headcanon of headcanons for your CF99 day.

( CF99 is Clone Force 99. Because if I said Bad Batch, it could be confused for the TBBshow--and meesa gots some personal beef with dat. So… CF99. Plus, the acronym just sounds cooler. )

WHEN WRECKER WAS INJURED, THE OTHERS GOT THEIR TATTOOS

Judging by Wrecker's head, more than likely, a bomb or similar blast had gone off in his face. It pulverized his eye, probably the hearing on that side too. I generally think part of his enhancement is that he has unbreakable bones, hence why his skull is fine.

He has a cybernetic eye, similar to the one that Commander Wolffe has, so this occurred the first year of the Clone Wars.

Because of the severe scaring, the eye and the event that might've cost Wrecker his life--it brought the team closer together, and Hunter, and by extension Crosshair, showed solidarity.

Brothers first, Mission Second, Orders third, and be damned to the Regs.

Hunter showed this solidarity and new closeness, by getting his infamous tattoo, same side of the head and face as Wrecker's scarring. Just as Wrecker's scar is the entire half, so was Hunter's tattoo.

( Plus, it was a personal step. Hunter has always been torn when it comes to Regs and even Civilians and Officials. He looks Normal, and thus they consider him the Normal one up until he Isn't--then its far worse treatment than just being rejected from the start. Hunter had learned a hard lesson about the pettiness of people, any people: They want your appearance to inform your personality, and they don't like being wrong, even though they are simply reacting to their own misinformed, petty and shallow judgement.)

( So, Hunter will be damned certain to give a "good" first impression, from now on. May the tattoos make the man. If someone is only going to judge things skin-deep, then they weren't worth associating with and its best to get it out of the way on the first impression )

( And who knows, Hunter would think, It would be worth proving someone wrong. )

Crosshair followed close behind. But Crosshair has always been afflicted with SEVERE PRACTICALITY. A tattoo for solidarity is all well and good until you've colored half your face like a harvest day decoration.

He knows Hunter's reasons. They're good reasons for Hunter. They're just not Crosshair's reasons.

So Crosshair gets a reticle around his dominant eye. Of course the lines cross his eyelid--he was practical, not a coward; if every clone can do it, so would he--But if he needed to, he could always cover it with makeup. Tattoos tend to personal identifiers, and he didn't want to give the Seppies or any other adversary time to have a list of personal descriptors.

( "If they don't catch you at all, it doesn't matter what's on your face", said Hunter, "And if they did catch you, then it wouldn't matter in the end anyway."

"Spoken like someone stuffed with straw and painted to scare birds away," said Crosshair.

Hunter threw wadded old socks at him. )

Tech doesn't care for facial tattoos, and he still maintains the soft roundness that would otherwise be called Baby Fat in clones so no amount of tattoo would work…

Instead, he opted to tattoo every area on his body that has suffered a bone break, with "symbolic imagery".

A few ribs here, where the "symbolic image" of them appear to be broken by an invisible lightning bolt. A leg here, with a "disruption" that appears similarly to the spikes on a soundwave monitor (the leg had been broken in three places near the knee during training). One arm here, depicted as a kind of semi-puzzle game. (The arm had been broken from an incident with an automatic door. )

And of course, it wouldn't be Tech if he didn't add small descriptions of what each one meant, what caused it, and when along side each tattoo…. In the star wars equivalency of esperanto.

( "It simply would not do if our adversaries got a hold of me and knew were all my structural weaknesses were at," said Tech, "So I wrote my descriptions in a constructed language that was created several hundred years ago by--"

"You… refer to your broken bones as structural weaknesses," drawled Crosshair, "…Of course you do."

"If you're worried about the enemy, You don't have to write your descriptions, you can just… tell people what happened, in your own words," said Hunter, "Make a conversation out of it."

"Nonsense, it is medically efficient if my body was ever recovered by a friendly command," said Tech, "and I would not have to tell anyone, I wrote it all down as needed."

"… Let's not talk about one of us dying," said Hunter.

"Too soon," said Crosshair. )

[stranger-rants]

i just don't understand the feminization of male characters. it doesn't make sense to me and maybe that's because i don't identify as lgbt so i'm not in the community or get their jokes but it's just hard for me to wrap my head around why 99% of the fandom insists that billy's girly. is it because he doesn't dress like a slob?

Well, LGBT is not an identity. It’s an acronym. Obviously - but I say this because lumping “LGBT” together is not necessarily beneficial. A person who is lesbian, gay, or bi doesn’t automatically understand what it’s like to be transgender or non-binary… and we’re talking about gender expression here, not attraction. Being transgender or non-binary may help you understand it better, but it’s not necessary.

“Babygirl Billy” as I’ve discussed has a specific meaning to me that isn’t necessarily about gender (I already made a post about it. I am not explaining again). It doesn’t directly translate to “girly” or “feminization,” but since you’ve brought those terms up I need to discuss things like gender expression, hegemonic masculinity, gender nonconformity, and so on…

I personally view Billy as having masculine and feminine traits. I think most people have a mix of these traits. Gender is a social construct that you are raised into by your society / culture. The society / culture you are raised in also has a hegemonic concept of what masculinity and femininity should look like. (e.g. Men must do x, not y in order to be men). Billy is abused for transgressing those boundaries.

There has always been a feminine side to Billy that he was never truly allowed to safely explore. A lot of men are denied this opportunity, and it causes them a lot of harm. If they dress too feminine, they are punished. If they express their emotions in a feminine manner, they are punished. And so on and so forth. This trauma makes them fearful of femininity / overcompensate with hypermasculinity.

That said, there are still ways that Billy expresses himself that do not fit into the hegemonic masculine mold. As a child there’s a noticeable switch from Billy wearing flowers on his clothes and being gentle to wearing very plain outfits that were meant to get dirty. Then as an older teen, we see him trying to balance a masculine façade with feminine interests like jewelry and perfume.

People can sit here and argue that, well, that’s just how men were in the 80s! …but no, the hegemonic masculine mold was still very much conservative in appearance as it still is today. Just because famous musicians could wear perfume and pierce their ears doesn’t mean your average boy wasn’t going to be called slurs for doing the same.

Remember that this is all a construct. Liking certain things that are gendered a certain way doesn’t mean you have to identify with that gender, unless you want to. However, it does mean living a certain way can code someone as gender non-conforming which is the way that many queer fans view Billy based on their own experience.

For some of us, Billy embracing his femininity is appealing as it addresses part of his trauma. He embodies a lot of his mother’s traits with the way he dresses and the way he reacts, but so many people treat Billy as a carbon copy of Neil. Neil represents hegemonic masculinity as he inflicts trauma onto Billy who very much tries to resist him in the way he can (e.g. how he dresses, acts, talks).

You don’t have to get it or agree with these interpretations, but using not “getting it” against people is where I draw the line. People making a problem out of those of us wanting to explore these aspects to a fictional character need to learn to mind their business, and that includes not putting up a stink or using “girly” or “feminization” in a derogatory way.

Overall, gender is a complicated spectrum. There are aspects of gender that are privileged, and aspects that are not. People who go out of gender bounds regardless of their gender identity experience trauma that could be resolved if we just allow people to express their gender in a more diverse way.

Anyone saying someone like Billy would hate it is really just saying he should hate it… because ultimately Billy is not real. The audience is projecting their thoughts and feelings about gender onto Billy. You take for granted that certain concepts of gender are more readily accepted, thus you don’t question masculine interpretations but you question feminine ones because it is unexpected.

[itsclydebitches]

You talked about writers warning for character bashing in HP fandom but I don't think we would see anything similar in the RWBY fandom. There seems to have been a shift in fan culture where people insist that their flattened evil version of the character is the one depicted in canon rather than saying they bash the character. I see something similar in another fandom where people can't just say they don't like a character, but have to justify it on moral grounds by making them the worst ever.

To clarify, those Harry Potter fics were posted between, like... 2004 and 2011. No modern fics that I came across. So yeah, I definitely think there's been a shift in fan culture over the years, the same one that has done away with things like "Don't like, don't read" and distinguishing preferences vs. squicks vs. triggers. "Flattened" is a great term, not just for how characters are depicted at times, but for how fans approach fic in general too. There's now this strong belief that certain fan content can't exist, period, which is how we end up with furious posts every time AO3 has a fundraiser, or—in our circle of the internet—RWBY fans flaming others for producing criticism. I don't want to make it sound like old school fandom was some utopia—quite obviously not. People have always been people, so to speak—but there has been a marked decrease in fans both staying in their lane and acknowledging that what they like may not be everyone else's cup of tea. The fact that acronyms like "YKINMK" existed at all speaks to the fact that such disagreements have always taken place, but at the same time, it seems like in 2021 you're less likely to come across such reminders at all, let alone someone backing off when faced with one. I mean, despite having the capability to cultivate our online experience more easily than ever before, fans are still outright begging one another to just block and move on. There's this very strong belief nowadays that if someone else doesn't like a particular kind of fan content, it's their duty to do everything in their power to, not ignore it, but erase it.

So yeah, you're much less likely to find an "Ozpin bashing" warning in 2021 and, I think, that stems as much from a lack of respect within the community as it does insisting that a personal interpretation is the canon, no exceptions allowed. Giving a "[name] bashing" warning is an acknowledgment that not everyone will agree/enjoy this interpretation of the character you've put forth and the author cares about you having the option to immediately back out. There's an understanding that it doesn't matter whether you can support this reading or not, the point is acknowledging that no matter how strongly you may feel that this interpretation is "correct," you accept that others will feel differently and you want to accommodate that. Interestingly, fandom has gotten a lot better with warnings when it comes to "objective" subjects; things we've somewhat universally agreed deserve a heads up. Stuff like easily understood triggers and major character deaths, helped along by AO3's formatting where you have to choose a major warnings category. Yet at the same time, warnings for subjective topics seems to have died down somewhat. Character bashing, chapters that have been revised, use of genre-specific clichés, really powerful characters edging into Mary Sue territory... the sort of warnings that aren't for anyone's mental health, but simply as a way to say, "The thing I made and love may not be the thing you love and want to read." Obviously we can still find examples like this—especially since everyone posting in the early 2000s hasn't just up and disappeared. The summary habits we learned early can stay with us—but on the whole, given that purity culture thinking that some things Can't Exist and this interpretation is The Correct Interpretation while that one is Very Wrong and Probably Bad, we've lost a lot of the cultural work that normalizes accepting different tastes and warning people just as a fandom form of politeness.

Ngl, fic summaries and related paratexts are super fascinating to me. In this age where fic is common knowledge, we've almost entirely lost disclaimers—"I don't own JKR's Harry Potter, just playing in the sandbox for a while!"—and gained a pseudo-chatting function in AO3's tags that, often, is more entertaining than informative. There have been good changes and bad changes, neutral changes and, as said, fandom has always struggled with these issues... but there is a difference between the fandom culture of now and the fandom culture of, say, 30 years ago. One rather distressing change is an inability to just go, "Yeah I like/dislike this character" without the community requiring an essay's worth of proof and taking your stance as an indictor of IRL morals. Honestly, the fact that I've seen so many posts the last few years saying something along the hyperbolic lines of, "Actually, I love the villain and think everything they've ever done is totally justified" speaks to this pressure to equate entertainment preferences (and fictional analyses) with moral worth. And that, in turn, leads to a change in how fanworks are presented to the rest of the community. Instead of that acceptance that everyone has preferences, we're getting more takes like:

Why would anyone warn for Ozpin bashing? Bashing him is expected and justified. He's a horrible person, remember? That's the one (1) accepted reading and any good member of the fandom will remember that, agree with it, and embrace such bashing in any fics they read. Ironwood? He's a dictator! Omg how can you like him? Why would you want a story that's kind to him? What does that say about you? Bootlicker 😒

[butterflyinthewell]

Important online safety message to minors.

I’m almost 40. I’ve seen some scary stuff online.

It’s a sad world that someone has to tell you to be more situationally aware of creeps, but I hope this advice helps you be safer online.

🗣

You don’t have to specify your age, but make sure it’s clearly known that you are a minor if an adult engages you online.

If it makes you more comfortable, you can put something on your profile like “I am a minor, 18+ please do not interact.” Add it to your posts too if you have room (it depends on the site). One unfortunate part of Web 2.0 social media is not everyone checks a profile before they retweet / reblog / share someone’s stuff.

If an adult keeps engaging with your stuff and you don’t want them to, it’s okay to block them.

Stay away from spaces adults have marked as nsfw, off-limits to minors or unsafe for minors. Chances are there is material in those spaces that you may not be ready for, or it will shock, offend, frighten, disgust and/or trigger you.

Some adults will pretend to be minors, and unfortunately I don’t know what kind of “tells” give away that they’re lying about their age, but I’m sure someone who knows more about that can reblog this and add that info.

Now, here’s what to do if a creepy adult starts creeping.

If their profile states they’re a MAP or NOMAP, block instantly. MAP / NOMAP means Minor Attracted Person / Non-Offending Minor Attracted Person. These people are pedophiles. Some of them identify themselves with the acronym PEAR or the pear emoji. 🍐 Be wary if you see this in someone’s profile info.

PEAR stands for Pro-Expression Anti-Repression. That’s something you apply to fiction, NOT reality. Fiction can be turned off, flicked off a screen, a book closed or otherwise disengaged from the moment someone doesn’t like it. Real life doesn’t work that way, and don’t trust anyone who claims it does.

It doesn’t matter if a MAP / NOMAP claims they’re getting “help” for their pedophilia or not, they should not be engaging you in any capacity.

If you engage them and discover they’re a MAP, disengage and block.

If an adult sends you anything that is sexually explicit, no matter the form, be it art, fanwork, videos, audio, roleplays, etc, screenshot it for evidence, block that person and tell someone you can trust.

Even nudity that is not sexual (this includes furry art with exposed genitals) should be treated as suspicious if an adult knows you’re a minor and still sends it to you despite being told you’re uncomfortable with it. They might be trying to desensitize you to the sight of nudity so they can show you more and more explicit stuff. Do as above; screenshot, block and report to someone you trust.

+ Part of the grooming process is the adult tries to reach you somewhere private, like DM’s or a messenger app and desensitize you to stimuli you would normally reject by exposing you little by little to it. Think of it as a twisted form of exposure therapy for phobias, but you don’t want this exposure. They want you to get curious and will up the ”intensity” of the explicit material.

The media itself existing is not the problem (unless the adult using it on you made it), the real problem is adult using it specifically to desensitize you into thinking that kind of stuff is okay in the real world. If an adult engages you, shows you media with questionable material in it and tries to tell you “see, it’s okay because it’s being done here” screenshot it, tell them fiction is not the real world and break off contact.

Most creeps stay hidden, so their blog may not contain a trace of anything weird, but when they engage you they send you all kinds of creepy adult stuff. An adult who is engaging you to groom you will use pretty much anything to try to make you think it’s normal and okay for them to do that to you. Remember always that it’s not. Remember the line between fiction and reality.

No adult should be sending a minor any pictures of naked people (or naked furry art with visible genitals) of any age no matter how innocent it seems!!!

If an adult sends you pictures or videos of themselves in their underwear, naked, showing their genitals or showing themselves doing sexually explicit stuff, screenshot the evidence, block them and report it to someone you trust.

If an adult asks you about sex toys or sends you info about them, that is really suspicious. Screencap, block and report to someone you trust.

If an adult asks you questions about your body, like what your hair ‘down there’ looks like, or how you’re developing, or if they ask if you touch your private parts, screenshot the evidence, block the adult and tell someone you trust.

If an adult asks you questions like “do you know what a (something sexual here) is?” or any questions that are sexually explicit or makes you uncomfortable, screenshot that crap, block them and tell someone you trust.

If you’re a creator and an adult tries to commission materials with nudity or sexually explicit stuff, refuse and tell them you’re a minor. If they persist, take screenshots, block them and tell someone you trust.

If an adult sends you violent or gory stuff and you don’t like it, demand that they stop and block them if they don’t. Screenshot anything they say if they keep doing it, and tell someone you trust.

If an adult demands you get on camera for them, do not do it. Screenshot the evidence, block them and tell someone you trust.

If an adult is threatening to reveal secrets you told them unless you do what they say(ie “send me a closeup of your private parts, or I’ll email all our chatlogs and your old naked photos to your whole school”). DON’T DO IT!! Screenshot the evidence, block them and tell someone you trust.

If an adult threatens to hurt themselves if you stop talking to them, stop talking to them anyway. This is especially true if they actually harm themselves and show you pictures or videos of it. That is a classic abuse tactic and it’s not your fault if they hurt themselves. Block them.

If an adult you blocked makes more accounts to keep contacting you, or starts showing up on other sites you visit trying to contact you, screenshot all the evidence and tell someone you trust.

If an adult (or anyone)tries to smear your name because you wouldn’t obey them, use any evidence you have against them in your defense and tell someone you trust about the situation.

If you run a blog talking about your abuse or experiences and an adult engages you to ask uncomfortable probing questions about the details of your trauma / abuse, be very suspicious and block them.

If an adult talks to you like you’re their special friend, or if they say you’re their very special friend, be very suspicious.

Acting like a sole source of kindness is one way an adult can groom a minor. They want you to feel like they are the only source of good that you can trust because they want you to gravitate more and more to them.

If you tell an adult you don’t like it when they swear while talking to you privately and they stop, but gradually start to do it again, be wary! An occasional oopsie slip or typo is one thing, but slipping in swear words when they know it makes you uncomfortable is suspicious. They may be testing your boundaries.

If an adult tries to set up an in person meeting, refuse it and talk to someone you trust about it.

If an adult (or anyone) tries to tell you that you should only trust them and nobody else, expects you to behave a certain way to be accepted, or if they act as if you’ve wronged them for trusting people other than them, that is a huge abuse warning sign. They are not safe to be around and you should break contact immediately.

If an adult compliments you in ways that makes you uncomfortable, break contact. A grown adult should not be telling a minor “you’re sexy” or “you’re hot.”

If an adult makes frequent comments about how mature and grown up they think you are, be suspicious.

If an adult learns you’re trans / non-binary and asks questions about your private parts or whether you plan to get surgery, be suspicious.

If an adult asks if you’re alone at home, say no even if you are.

If an adult asks if they can come visit you, say no.

If an adult asks for your phone number, don’t give it to them, no matter how nice or tempting they may be.

If an adult is making you uncomfortable in any way, it’s okay to block them and disengage.

Do not approach an adult with nsfw stuff you made. If they run across it in public on your blog that’s one thing. Sharing it with them in private can get both of you into trouble. Don’t do it.

🗣

Note: if you, a minor, did any of the above because you didn’t know better at the time, know that you are not a bad person. No adult should take advantage of your youth or innocence to hurt you.

🗣

To adults out there:

Do not approach minors with anything sexually explicit!!! This should not need to be said.

If you send something and find out they’re a minor after the fact, apologize and don’t do it again. If you think it’s proper to avoid any more private contact, do that. If you think breaking all contact period is proper, do that.

Make sure minors know you are over 18, whether it’s somewhere on your profile or tacked onto your posts. Something like “over 18, minors DNI” is helpful. I personally have my year of birth (1980) on my profile because that’s easier than changing a number every year.

You can’t prevent minors who fake their age to see naughty stuff from engaging with your stuff, but you can make it clear that you will not engage them back. And do not engage them. In fact, if you’re worried about that, block them when you discover them.

Private conversations with minors is okay, but make sure you tell them you’re not comfortable talking about something if they mention something sexually explicit. Even if it’s fandom related stuff, keep the conversation away from anything more than talking about characters dating or kissing or whatever.

If something you ship has an underage character, do not talk about it in private with a minor, not even if the character is aged up to adulthood.

Got nsfw stuff on your blog? Tag it that way.

I use “n s f w post” for stuff I want to show up in other related tags, “nsfw post” for reblogs, and “nudity” for nonsexual nudity like mermaids with bare chests or artistic nudes. Those tags are specifically for minors to blacklist or mute. (I don’t usually reblog nsfw artwork, but sometimes I post nsfw fanfics, create nsfw text posts or reblog nsfw text posts / fanfic. If I feel it’s nsfw, I tag it such even if most people don’t think it’s nsfw.)

If it’s fanfiction, I make sure the rating is listed and that it’s nsfw, and I try to warn for triggers as best I can.

If your blog or website features a lot of adult or violent content, mark it 18+ and tell minors to not interact.

If a minor approaches you and tells you a harmless secret, fine, keep it secret. You, the adult, should never approach a minor and tell them you will keep their secrets.

If a minor is expressing a desire to harm themselves or someone else, don’t keep that secret. Tell them to talk to someone they trust irl or put them in contact with a hotline or website where they can get help. Be supportive in talking them down from immediate harm, but do not become their therapist. (It’s tempting, you see a kid in trouble and want to help, but always be careful!)

If a minor tells you they’re being abused by an adult in their life, put them in contact a website or phone number where they can seek help. Be supportive and listen, but don’t become their therapist.

If you run a role play blog, state explicitly that you will not engage in nsfw rps with minors.

If you’re roleplaying with a minor and the story takes a nsfw turn, tell the minor you will not role play a sex scene with them no matter how much they want to. Either fade it to black with a time skip or bail out of the rp.

I say this because I forgot the age of someone I was rping with on AIM a long long loooong time ago and it got explicit, and they got in trouble with their parents for it. Their parents contacted me on AIM without their teen’s knowledge and reamed me out so hard I was scared for weeks. They were right to do so! I told them they were right, apologized profusely and swore to never rp with or speak to their teen on AIM ever again, and they agreed to those terms. I kept that promise. Any contact with that former rp partner was done in public, such as via deviantart comments or LiveJournal comments. It was a major learning experience for me and it stuck because this happened almost 20 years ago.

As an autistic adult I feel more like a kid with all kinds of adult knowledge and privileges (ie can gamble, drink, visit adult places) that most kids don’t have. I relate more to people who are younger than me, but that doesn’t give me the right to assume their level of knowledge or lived experience is equal to mine.

What I’m trying to say is always be aware of the age of the person you’re rping or speaking with!

Do not commission sexually explicit or violent stuff from creators who are minors.

Do not engage with a minor who sends you sexually explicit stuff. Tell them that’s inappropriate or you’re not comfortable with getting that from them.

It’s okay to agree with a minor that an adult celebrity or character they have a crush on is attractive or whatever, but if the celebrity / character is a minor or the minor talks about wanting to have sex with that character / celebrity, tell them that’s not an appropriate topic of conversation because of your ages.

This also applies to them sharing fanworks with you depicting explicit nsfw stuff. Deflect them and tell them it’s not appropriate due to your ages.

Do not ask minor for personal info like their school, phone number or address.

Don’t do any video chats with a minor unless they’re family or it’s a group thing like a Zoom event.

‼️ TAG YOUR STUFF APPOPRIATELY!! YES, EVEN STUFF YOU RESHARE!!

‼️ USE APPROPRIATE WARNINGS!! YES, EVEN STUFF YOU RESHARE!!

[baeddel]

@androfem​ has made a number of good posts about transmisogyny, addressed to a milieu I’m very glad not to be part of anymore. I wanted to run off of something they wrote in this one...

[2.5k words. transmisogyny, racism tw. epistemic status: Hawkeye Gough]

while hedging an argument in the second paragraph, they write “i’m by no means someone who can definitively say what tme/tma mean” (thus preparing us to hear a definition but to treat it as nondefinitive), but that they see the acronym ‘tme’ (’tranmisogyny exempt’) as “the most palatable attempt trans women and transfem nb people have made towards identifying whether other trans people are one of them or not, and other trans people communicating that as well voluntarily.” By palatable they mean to other people in their milieu, who they spend the rest of the post attacking over the reasons they found all the other terminology (casab etc.) unpalatable. Their criticisms are all quite good.

But - am I crazy, or, aren’t they wrong in this quote? The way I remember it, trans women did not come up with the term ‘tme’. This was something that tme people came up with themselves. The use of tme would eventually become imbricated with the disuse of casab, under the argument that casab requires you to ‘out’ yourself, and so on, which was its own controversy. But originally it wasn’t related to this reservation or at least I never experienced the two as connected. tme was something that, to us, came out of nowhere; it was something like an alien bacteria penetrating the atmosphere from the belly of an asteroid; it woke us up to a whole neighbouring discourse that we were unaware of. That neighbourhood was made up of cis women, trans men, and nonbinary cafabs who were beginning to grapple with the ‘transmisogyny question’. At the time, most people did not take the concept of ‘transmisogyny’ seriously; many people still believed that trans women had male privilege and so on. It was a huge surprise to us to find a whole emerging discourse of non-trans women who believed transmisogyny was real and took it seriously enough to invent their own terminology for describing it.

It’s possible you can trace the coinage to some trans woman somewhere. But at least, at the time that we encountered it, we understood it to be the self-description of non-trans women. A lot of trans women at the time reacted very negatively to this. One of the main criticisms was that tme was not a ‘coherent category’ - could we say that it tries to be too definitive, ie. a definition that overapplies? The anxiety was that it would collect the experience of subjects which cannot rightly be put together; trans men, cis women, cafabs, whoever else, do not all experience patriarhcy(!) in the same way. They all have different proximities to misogyny, emotional labour (when you were still allowed to say that), access to community, sexual access & availability, and so on. Later or earlier, I don’t remember, this same discursive device would be used by trans women against casab; we were derided for “treating casab like a coherent class.”

Androfem may be surprised to learn that this criticism orginates with trans women, if they weren’t there for this. The gesture returns, later on in their post, when they chastise others in their milieu for reading trans women’s arguments in bad faith. They caution that “the assumption shouldn’t be made that [a transfem is] completely unaware of or in denial about” all of the various nuances of proximity whenever she says “definitively” (emphasis mine) that “tme people aren’t affected by transmisogyny”. At this point, the taboo on definitions reaches a delerious extreme - Androfem’s peers take issue even with this tautology! And the solution Androfem proposes is not to take the claim seriously, but to secretly insert something that disrupts it, imagine some inapplicable cases, and so on, and, further, to assume that she is also doing it behind the scenes. Androfem identifies this obsurantism with transmisogyny; their peers cannot bear to take a trans woman seriously, so they will always send her work back and demand a new more palatable analysis. And we trust they are right to make this diagnosis; but this trans woman experiences it as the terrible return of her own native discourse. What we sowed in 2012 they now reap in 2021.

Why has this discourse progressed to such an epistemologically vicious place, where no statements about gender are possible? Baudrillard would enjoy watching our transsexuality become transpolitical. For whatever unconscious reason, whenever we are presented with a master signifier capable of rendering the transcendental field, we are immediately compelled to castrate it. Our destiny is to constantly throw discourses into indifference. Maybe. But the more direct lesson is that something went wrong with the method of analysis we employed to explicate transmisogyny in 2012. What went wrong?

Maybe we can begin with some statements in Androfem’s post and work backwards. They write that “tme people benefit ... from transmisogyny”, although they insert in parenthesis “(some more than others)”. This was an analysis we would have subscribed to in 2012. In 2021, we now want to ask: who benefits and in what way? Who benefits more, who less, and why?

It’s true that transmisogyny brings some profit. Growing up as trans girls we are often deployed as women are deployed; we become the older sister, surrogate mother, and secret girlfriend. Whenever our peers see us in the correct light and notice our softness (to borrow a Saxon term), they exploit it. For boys the profit derives primarily from our socially acceptable proximity in the enforced homosociality that children in our culture endure. The trans girl is a girl who you can have sleepovers with, who you can have in the boys locker room, and so on, and therefore have early sexual and emotional access to. Girls generally exploit it a little later on, when heterosexual relations are expected. The trans girl can be a special kind of boy, like a ‘gay best friend’, but who is sexually available. Both boy and girl cast their brief teenage becomings on their own special gendered Other who is capable of facilitating it by her difference. Contra Balzac, it is precisely her castration that allows her to function as a superavailable Other, not (yet) as an overproximate Same that makes us recoil.

This relation of the tme to trans women dominates in the Bay Area of California, where trans women have resumed some of our traditional roles as temple functionaries. You probably have some homeless or recently homeless or about-to-be homeless trans woman (lets say she is ‘having to be homeless’) in your overcrowded apartment who will always be there to help you process your gender feelings and is probably down to fuck if you can get over yourself and make a move on her.

But these wages of transmisogyny are transitory and marginal. While most trans women will have encountered some of these kinds of exploitative gendered relations, it is by no means a universal experience of tme people. And, whats more, it is possible to have these relations, with the same benefits, which are not exploitative. I have known many cis girl-trans girl couples who got together under the bonds of enforced heterosexuality because of the profit each had for the other - the trans girl is not threatening, better about her boundaries, and so on, perhaps because of her own experiences of sexual exploitation; the cis girl, for equally contingent reasons, just ‘gets it’, and doesn’t try and make a man out of the trans girl - and when the trans girl realizes she is trans and comes out to her partner, the two track an escape route from heterosexuality together. There is no reason to expect it to always go one way, exploitative, or always the other, emancipatory. Is the cis girl ‘benefitting from transmisogyny’ in this scenario? Is she perhaps benefitting less than others, or more than others? I think that we cannot easily analyze every relation between person and person in terms of cost and benefit; even when we are bound by structures of domination, we cannot already anticipate the outcome. At the same time, if such experiences are rare, we aren’t surprised, because we know that the desiring-situations are staged in a certain way that makes discovering these kinds of escape routes difficult.

But simaultaneous with these occasional benefits, 1. transmisogyny is usually damaging to a trans woman without bringing any profit to her persecutor, and 2. transmisogyny is usually damaging to a tme person as well. Don’t you think so? Superficially, it acts as a limit on your presentation; all cis men growing up experience limits on their behaviour, backed by punishments, to prevent or destroy whatever might seem transsexual in them. Maybe it plays a similar role in the upbringing of cis women, trans men, cafabs, etc., in ways that are waiting to be articulated? On a deeper level, transmisogyny - as the hygeine of gendered categories, the social governance of presentation, etc. - plays a crucial role in the overall desiring-situation of oppressive heterosexuality; it creates a series of taboos, anxieties, myths and harsh realities which, in some indirect way, help to maintain heterosexuality’s renewal in each successive generation.

I think some harm was done by a too-ready application of frameworks developed to analyze white supremacy to the question of gender. The progressive leitkultur in those days was still the ‘invisible napsack’. While for transmisogyny the benefits are merely occasional, there are universally accessible wages of whiteness. White people enjoy a distorted labour market; the deterritorialization of black neighbourhoods creates (barely) affordable apartments for (eg.) white students [the scenario with the Oakland enaree we described implicitly takes place in one of these apartments]; and, most generally, there are habits of prosociality between white people which are difficult to break that continually renew the same distribution of wealth, status, care and intimacy [Eldridge Cleaver referenced Harry Golden’s gag about ‘vertical integration, horizontal segregation’ (pg 67) as a good description of race relations in Folsom; we find it to be a good description of race relations in the trans community as well].

When we tried to apply these readymade frameworks to transmisogyny, we found it difficult to construct relevant categories. Transmisogyny could not be domesticated to a form of exploitation metaphorized in economic terms. Therefore, every further demand for a ‘materialism’ that could clearly enumerate the relationships of exploitation would be frustrated, finding only edge cases and anecdotes. There was no underlying machinery that always produced this or that outcome. Therefore, each category was “incoherent”, too definitive, unable to capture what we took for an underlying system that was just out of reach. But the problem was only a misplace of focus. Transmisogyny is not really a system of exploitation; it’s the nightmare of a patrilineality that cannot enforce its borders. It is necessary therefore to move beyond categories like oppression and privilege, bigot and victim, exploited and exploiter, and deal with the domination that captures both ‘tme’ and ‘tma’ in its ruses. Now we can answer some of the old warhorses; CASAB is not a class which we can say anything about, nor is tme or even tma; it is rather the residue of a paternal subjugation, a ‘weight of dead generations’ that everyone confronts moments upon their exit from the womb; a universal coercive sexuation which we cannot help but encounter, combat or obey, enforce on others and despair in our private moments. Everyone, everywhere, is aware of the problem; and the exit is waiting, somewhere, as yet undiscovered, for anyone to seize.

So much for the riddle of 2012. In 2021 the situation is not really the same. Androfem’s milieu were not socialized by anti-revisionist parties and do not metaphorize their experiences in economic terms. Their platform is a sort of legalism. They enter into a discourse which has been a continuous bloodbath for twelve years (the relevant year for them is not 2012 but 2009, and the website not tumblr but wordpress); every discussion has already been had; what is necessary now is only to enforce the common law precedent. They are obliged to accept the existence of transmisogyny because it was already accepted before they got there; they don’t really understand why and are not curious about it. They are not gender abolitionists, but inclusionists. If they had lived thirty years ago they would probably have been exclusionists and thirty years before that, inclusionists again. Every conversation begins with some pious disavowal, ‘I can’t believe we’re having this conversation again...’ Everything has already been tabulated in their stare decisis; asexuals are not lgbt, queer is a slur, cottagecore is colonialist, and so on. What motivates them is primarily some irrelevant triviality like whether this or that fanfiction is normalizing abuse or whatever. It is thus easy to see why Androfem argues that the old taboo on being definitive is transmisogyny; in their milieu it is a strategy for rendering the anti-transmisogyny laws unenforcable. If the law is ever invoked there is a loophole; look here, you missed this nuance...

Much of that milieu - from my own experience with it - is dominated by TERF cults that essentially run friend groups as front organizations; they start off siccing teenages on each other over shipping drama and soon encourage mobbing trans women undesirables. These networks were active on wordpress in 2009, they were on tumblr when I joined in 2012 (where they were able to leverage irl connections to intimidate members of my friend group who were organizing), and they are running discord servers and stalking tumblrs here in 2021. [If anyone from that scene is reading this far and this sounds at all familiar to them: I’m sorry but, yeah, you’re in a cult. You’re better than this! The fandom drama commentariat is not really worth trying to reform. Sauve qui peut!]

These are normally crypto-TERFs who are ‘officially’ inclusive of trans women and, in fact, their friend-group cults are usually full of trans women. Trans women, we have to say, make the most ruthless transmisogynists. To this extent we must disagree with Androfem when they say that “the smallest demographic in [TERF] communities are transfems”; in my experience transfems have sometimes been the most numerous, and it is precisely because TERFs are organized around transmisogyny. The reasoning behind this paradoxical outcome is understandable only in terms of dianetics and thetan space operas.

Anyway. I have sometimes felt that transmascs need some kind of Prince of their own; someone who is able to articulate his own transsexual line of critique in the face of trans women’s well-known and well-settled one, but with the minimum amount of ressentiment; who can hold his own against transfeminine parochialsm and not cave to cheap attacks, but also not make them, and not become parochial himself. I think that ‘tme’ is at its most valuable as an organizational principle when only someone like Androfem can “definitively” articulate it. It has to be a space for tracking the escape from my own desiring-situation on my own terms, in my own style, by my own design; bathed in my own light... But to be capable of accomplishing this it needs to become a break with all previous discourses. One that is open, flexible, and forward-looking; a dangerous gambit which is definitive and unprecedented...

[gerrydelano]

If it’s alright, I’d like to ask a question about gender? You mentioned being bigender, and I’ve been wondering if I might be as well. I quite like my assigned gender, feel community with other people of that gender, enjoy presenting in that way, but I also feel a connection to nonbinary communities, sometimes want to be n.b, and specifically enjoy presenting as my agab but “doing it wrong” or a little androgynous but closer to my assigned gender.

But I’m not sure if I’m trying to fit in with my n.b friends and am really a slightly gnc gay person, or if I’m actually some flavor of nonbinary. Does this sound like a way a bigender person might experience things? Or does it sound like a different label, including being cis? I’ve been questioning for a year and a half and I still don’t know 😭

you may ABSOLUTELY ask a question about gender! if you're willing to accept this ronologue in return, that is. you know me 😅

if you've been questioning like that for this long, if you find yourself wanting to be nonbinary, then there's no rule in the world that says you're NOT nonbinary or that you couldn't be! many nonbinary people still connect with their AGAB in a variety of ways, sometimes even through their experience with relationships and attraction, so you're right on the money re: taking your orientation into account as well. it's super common for the two to go hand in hand, and even change in conjunction with one another.

a lot of nonbinary and trans people "start small" by experimenting with labels and presentation in doses, too! before they realize they want to lean further one way or do less of another thing or completely scrap something else. most everyone i know has gone through a bunch of different labels before finding comfort in a few, myself included! i've. probably identified as everything in the LGBT+ acronym at some point over time. the strungle 🤪

a person doesn't have to physically present a certain way to be any which gender, either. what matters is how you feel about it, your personal relationship to the concepts of masculinity and femininity, and how you conceptualize yourself. all it takes to Trans Your Gender really is just... feeling that way about it, wanting to be something, even if it's not "as far" as some people go when transitioning "completely" away from their AGAB. (for lack of better phrasing, just for simplicity's sake.)

nonbinary has a trillion different meanings! this can be one, too. if you're more comfortable just IDing as GNC for a while, go right ahead. if another word tickles your fancy and makes you perk up like a dog when the treat bag crinkles, that could be a sign! i can't give you a universal yes or no to whether your experience is distinctly of the Bigender Genre or not, because everyone's going to experience that differently, too!

for me, i know i just "can't pick"/oscillate between Butch and Boy, i still feel connected to wlw experience but i also am Just Some Guy sometimes, all at once or back-to-back really fast, or one for a long period of time before it flops back to the other. it fluctuates! i used genderfluid for a while, but after narrowing it down and thinking more about my sexuality, too, bigender just feels Right. finally getting to be peacefully around people who don't make me feel guilty or traitorous or undesirable for being one or the other, or too much/not enough of one thing at the same time, has really helped me to feel better about embracing that. blows a kiss to the fruit salad bowl.

so many people have started exactly where you are. many of them found themselves in a wildly different position on the spectrum years later once they learned they were "allowed" to be trans and keep exploring. others are perfectly content to stay put! you won't know until all that time passes, but if you feel a particular way now? that still counts.

right now, you are the oldest you have ever been. you know yourself the most you've ever known yourself to date, and you are the most developed version of yourself that exists in this moment! if who you are right now can be described with a word that makes you happy, go ahead and use that word right now. don't worry about what may have felt so concrete once in the past, or what may change in the future.

you could be a GNC cis person, sure! but make sure you don't ever say "just GNC :/" when you say that, as if it's less real or "valid" or understandable, as if it doesn't come with its own unique set of experiences, too. you could be nonbinary, yeah! but don't think that means you have to change anything about how you socially present, if you're happy as you are. whatever you feel describes how you feel, i think that's wonderful and i'm happy for you!

i can't slap a label on your forehead and call it a day, is the thing. only you can make this call for yourself. i think talking it out with your nonbinary friends who know you better might be helpful if you haven't already! or just do it again.

i think you're onto something with questioning, though, and this amount of questioning IS indicative of having a case of The Genders™ in some capacity, so keep pursuing it. you'll be okay!

either way, i hope you find a way to describe your experience that makes you feel like yourself 🧡 good luck!

[the-brave-and-the-dumb]

Don't know which baby leftist needs to hear it but

Movements differ depending on country - it's history and culture. While learning theory remember nothing works the same. It is great to take inspiration and good solutions from wherever but you will never make an exact copy of movement. And that is good! Problems may start when someone from other country calls you names just because your theory doesn't match their own.

Now I'm going to talk more from Polish perspective. If it works in another Eastern European (and maybe other) country I'm glad, if not I would love to hear about other solutions or takes on certain subjects!

it is okay to ask kinksters on Pride to make their own platform and stick to it - while they were huge part of Stonewall, Europe didn't had Stonewall (Poland still didn't had such prominent event) and we do not owe anyone anything. Kink = consent. If you're for example 14 y/o asexual your safety is more important than someone's kink.

this one is universal but it's worth reminding: cops are not your friends. Do not rely on them. If it is possible take some martial art lessons. Learn about anarchists and how to spot them in Pride or riots - they will most likely protect you the best. Learn about safety rules like which clothes to wear on a riot.

it's okay not to follow BLM movement frantically. If you care more (as in you're well informed about their problems, their problems are priority for you) about minorities that are in high numbers in Eastern Europe: Jewish folks, Roma people, Asian immigrants or refugees from Middle East you are not racist just because some American calls you that. It is MUCH MORE important to care about people who can be threatened in your own country (Black people included) than to exhaust yourself fighting for causes in US or UK. (Some may wonder why did I even mentioned that but for example people in Poland tend to care more about loud events like BLM riots but are numb and do not react when police kills their own folks or someone from minority present in country)

remember that take on race differs in US, Europe and probably in Africa and Asia. Scientifically it is most probable that there is no such thing as race. US take on race is to distinct the privileged from unprivileged.

about privilege: there is a huge probability that what is called privilege in US doesn't apply to you living on a different continent, especially in a place that is ethnically consistent.

languages are very different. We kinda copied it from English speakers and are using it but except for LGBT which is an acronym there is no much need to use forms like 'people with disabilities'. Polish language mostly implicates you are talking about person ('niepełnosprawny' can be never used to spek about an object, opposite to English 'disabled'). They can be used alternately, unless. of course, someone from said community doesn't like it and prefers one term. Let's remember some communities, like deaf people in Poland do not want to be called 'people with disabled hearing' or something like that. They call themselves 'deaf' (głuchy) which in Polish always had kinda negative connotation. Some people now prefer to say 'enslaved people' instead of 'slaves' and it is fine but you do not have to use it in your own language (in Polish both of these exist and are used alternatively, there is no need to demonize one of these words).

just because you were born in Europe (and I do not mean western countries) you're not a colonist. Don't let anyone push this narration on you. You never stole anyone's land. Especially Americans and British never had much neighbours around them, so they do not always realise that history is not as easy as 'colonised and colonizators'. Be respecful and do not make the difficult topic this shallow.

[omoi-no-hoka]

I read your post on how you got started in the translation industry and I was wondering if it is possible to get an entry/basic level translation gigs in Japan with N3-level proficiency or if even those want at least N2 proficiency. Also since you've been living and working in Japan for a long time, what advice would you give those wanting to work in Japan in regards to avoiding black companies?

Finding Translation Work in Japan

Hi there! Thank you for your ask. 

To be honest, “translation” is so very broad that I can’t give you a simple “yes” or “no” as an answer. My answer is “Maybe” with the following caveats. For the sake of this post, I’m going to assume that your native language is English, or that you have native-level proficiency, and you plan to do English↔Japanese translation in a Japanese workplace.

Field of Translation

This is perhaps the biggest factor. I understand that in order to translate legal or medical things, there is a particular certification that you must obtain. This requires N1/native level proficiency in both languages. I have thought of attempting to obtain the medical one, but I’m not ready for it. I would need to study a LOT of terminology in both English and Japanese.

As for other fields, I think it really depends on the company and how much they are willing to teach you on the job. Also, depending on the field, many field-specific terminology may be katakana words derived from English, meaning that while they will be new Japanese words for you, they will not be entirely new words.

But if I were to work in, say, the banking industry doing translation, I would certainly have a hard time learning all the words, especially if I didn’t already have some sort of background in banking in English.

For example, I specifically work as a translator for a company that provides services to other very big companies that you have heard of. Technically, I work for an anti-malware software company and the technical support aspect of it. When a product is updated, I will translate internal manuals and things like that. I also translate the Big Wig conversations, which are done in English since the client and our company’s HQs are in America, so that our local guys know what’s going on. I also create/translate/edit/take minutes for presentations given to Big Wigs. I also handle all IT issues in our project, because our IT ticketing system is 100% in English. ANYTHING English-related is funneled to me.

Contractually-speaking, I do not work for any other clients. But since I’m the only translator in our company in Hokkaido capable of interpretation as well, I am often asked to assist under the table. (Translation and interpretation are two entirely different beasts, btw.) 

While I don’t have a background in IT or computers or anything like that, since most of the terminology is in katakana and I’m not absolutely clueless about computers, my learning curve wasn’t too sharp. I struggled more with bullshit corporate acronyms and the formalities of Business Japanese (sonkeigo and kenjougo). 

A person holding an N2 is considered capable of Business Japanese. Even if you have extensive knowledge in the field of translation, you will have a VERY difficult time adjusting to the Japanese-language workplace if you are not good with Business Japanese. From that standpoint, I cannot recommend someone at N3 to enter a Japanese company to do translation. It will be grueling. I was N1 when I joined the company, and I still had difficulty composing emails and other workplace-related words I hadn’t come across. 

Start with Freelance Translation/Proofreading

There was a year or so where I had N1 but was still teaching English. I found freelance English-Japanese translation jobs online. Lots of them were one-shot things, like “translate this brochure about our little tiny town” or “I am a researcher who has written a paper on Persian-French relations during the 16th century, and I need someone to proofread my English.” Lol that one was pretty specific and paid very handsomely. By doing well on a job, I established a relationship with that client and I would get more work either from them or someone they knew. Prices are fixed before translation. 

The average price for translation is 3-7 yen per character (if the original text is in Japanese) or per word (if the original text is in English). The price increases depending on the complexity of the material. The brochure about the little town was 4 yen per character, but the research paper was 9 yen word (despite the fact I was only proofreading instead of translating because it was incredibly complex). 

Proofreading goes alongside translation. I didn’t really do much of that, but you can see a price range of 1-5 yen per character/word. If you are N3, proofreading is great way to get your feet wet!

NOTE: Do not take on proofreading or translation jobs for a language that is not your native language. No matter how good you think your Japanese is, it will not be good enough to proofread. Even if you have an N1, you will miss things. Even I, as a translator with almost 3 years experience in my field, always have a Japanese coworker proofread everything I translate into Japanese, and 9 times out of 10 they fix at least one thing. 

How to Avoid Black Companies

In Japan, some companies are labeled ブラック企業 “black kigyou,” which means that they violate labor laws in some heinous fashion. Denying pay, benefits, or leave, forcing employees to do grueling amounts of overtime that can lead to 過労死 karoushi (death by overwork), etc. These companies will rob you of your sanity at best and your life at worst, and are to be avoided at all costs. 

When I was searching for a position teaching English, I googled reviews of each big Eikaiwa school, like AEON or whatever else there is. Many previous teachers air their grievances on places like glassdoor.com. It was easy to learn which schools I should avoid.

Also, I applied online to many different big Eikaiwas. Three of them (sorry, I can’t remember which) immediately emailed me back and said I was hired, without an interview or anything. That should be a HUGE red flag to you right there. Why are they so desperate to hire that they’ll take you without even giving you an interview? And even if they do later say, “Your hiring is dependent upon an interview,” that means that their initial contact email was fraudulent. 

Research the company as best you can. See if you can find someone who has worked for them. Beware of smaller, private companies. They tend to fly under the radar and are prone to be even shittier. Then again, there was a woman who died of death by over work a few years ago and she worked for the biggest advertising firm in Japan.

Here’s an article from Business Insider about karoushi and black companies.

A 2016 report examining karoshi cases and their cause of death found that more than 20% of people in a survey of 10,000 Japanese workers said they worked at least 80 hours of overtime a month.

The Health, Labor and Welfare Ministry defines the threshold for karoushi as greater than 80 hours of overtime a month. Since this article was posted in 2018, a new law regarding overtime has been implemented by the Japanese government. Now there is a legal cap on overtime of 100 hours per month (and 720/year) for busier months, with the general upper limit set at 45 hours per month (360 hours/year). 

Even if a company isn’t black, be prepared for overtime. My company makes sure that every employee adheres to the 45 hours per month limit...as best they can. If you follow this blog you know that I have done 60 and 70 hours of overtime in certain months, because I am our only translator and when shit hits the fan I’m the only one who can handle it. 

However, my company is very good about making sure that I receive all of my overtime pay. Every single minute of overtime I do is properly reimbursed. Sometimes this means that if I work 60 hours one month, I will only report 45 that month, and then report 15 extra hours the next month. Or I will take a couple days off but claim that I worked (with my bosses’ approval, of course). 

I can’t speak for other companies for sure, but I fear that when this law was introduced in 2019, many companies did not change their business models and instead forbid employees from reporting overtime that exceeded legal limits, meaning they would be going without compensation. 

So be aware that if you are going to work in a Japanese company, you are likely to have overtime. Some people don’t, and congratulations to them! But it is an extremely real possibility. Make sure that you can handle it physically and mentally, and that you are being properly compensated. After my first month of Big Overtime, my boss told me, “I’m surprised that you managed to do all that. I thought that Americans had a poor work ethic compared to Japanese people, but now I see that’s not true.”

kinda racist, but thx

If you have an interview and it goes well and you receive a contract, ask to take the contract and have time to think about it. Then, have a Japanese person you trust read the contract and make sure there is nothing shady hidden in there. Contracts and legalese are difficult enough in my own native language--I don’t trust myself to catch something in Japanese. 

If your friend thinks that the contract is fair as well, and if you feel like the company has a good atmosphere, take the job. That is what I did, and I am glad I did.

Translation and Interpretation

A lot of people don’t know the difference between “translation” and “interpretation” and use them interchangeably, but they are actually entirely different tasks that require different skills. 

Translation: the conversion of written text from one language to another.

Interpretation: the conversion of spoken word from one language to another.

You will most likely be hired as a translator, because translation is much cheaper than interpretation. However, if your company is like mine, you will have interpretation work to do as well. You may be asked to take part in meetings and facilitate communication between the English-speaking and Japanese-speaking people, or act as a guide to a client from American headquarters, for example.

With translation, you usually have the blessing of time. You can look up a word you don’t know, you can think about the grammar, you can think about tone. 

But with interpretation, you need to be:

Listening to Speaker A’s English and mentally summarizing their words

Starting to say Speaker A’s words in Japanese while holding on to the bits that will come later because English and Japanese word order is so different

Continuing to listen to added speech from Speaker A as you concurrently are relaying their previous speech in to Japanese and retaining the parts that you can’t say yet because of word order.

Then do it all for again for Speaker B’s reply, and repeat. 

Basically, your mind has to be doing three things at once. Does your head hurt? Mine does. If I have to do simultaneous interpretation like that for more than a couple hours I literally develop a headache. 

I will NEVER recommend an N3 person attempt interpretation in a business setting. Nor N2 for that matter. It is hard and you do not have the benefit of time to think and double-check things.

Also, many people don’t understand exactly how difficult it is to do interpretation. I have to sometimes just say “Sorry, pause” to the speaker because my head can’t retain any more, especially if figures and data and dates are referred to. Thankfully my coworkers have come to understand my method and are just happy that I can facilitate communication for them. 

If you have any other questions regarding job hunting, please let me know and I’d be more than happy to offer what advice I have! 💖

[schibi12]

Toonvengers Together!

*cue the Avengers theme once more*

Im back with more characters for my marvel toon au aka Toonvengers and to end the phase 1 Avengers with the rest of the Founding Members, some important supporting characters and the first villain ooooh and another Hawkeye recast i promise this is the last one.

Oh and Thank you to some friends who helped me establish some of the characters you know who you are and thank you very mucho for the help!!!

To start this post my final decision and who shall be Hawkeye from Oswald to Della and finally Goofy ok so for some people Hawkeye is just a normal man with a bow and arrow but for me he is an agent, a best friend, a father and a mentor and when i think of Hawkeye is that scene in Age of Ultron when the Avengers go hide to a "safehouse" and it's revealed that is Hawkeye's farmhouse where his family lives and The Avengers and us the audience learn how much he is putting on the line in every mission he accepts so my third and final choice as Hawkeye is Goofy  they're both loyal and brave, and even though they are underestimated by their peers and even if it affects them personally they don't care and continue to do their job, and yes Goofy and Daisy have a great friendship since Goofy was sent to detain her, he instead saw the good in her and recruited her to S.H.I.E.L.D. or should i say A.N.V.I.L.L. the Alliance of Neutralization and Vigilantism of International Law-Affairs and Logistics ( i am very proud of that acronym). And Yes Max exists in this au.

So we have Iron-Man, Captain America, Hulk, Black Widow and Hawkeye, yes we are missing the Mighty Thor and to be honest i had a hard time deciding who would be him from Bimbo, Foghorn Leghorn, Porky and Bendy but i finally decided on Flip the Frog so the reason why is... i don't have a really good reason other than Thor was turned to a Frog in the comics but i feel that no character can do Thor justice so i chose a character that really doesn't have a defined personality so that i could mold it to fit Thor so he pretty much has the storyline as Phase 1 Thor he was arrogant, conceited, vain overall a jerk and he was sent to ToonTown to learn to be worthy of Mjolnir his powerful mallet and to be humble so same as the character but he still is sometimes a jerk.

So our first big bad Loki the God of Mischief or Marvin the Martian both  scheming, chaotic, want to be a ruler, have a certain charisma and they're on their own side plus Marvin's helmet reminded me of Loki's helmet with horns.

So as director of A.N.V.I.L.L. our Nick Fury is Elmer Fudd or should i say Elmer Fury and like the same Nick Fury they are a bit of an enigma sometimes a friend or foe and although he may not trust you and he may do some questionable actions or decisions and is morally grey he justs want to protect the humanity well i guess the toons...toonanity idk.

And lastly Maria Hill the Deputy Director of A.N.V.I.L.L. Fury's right hand woman is Fanny Cottontail or Fanny Hill loyal, pragmatic, professional, tough-minded but in times of levity and with friends she jokes around, and is just a bad ass all the way.

So that is it for Phase 1 Toonvengers i hope you enjoyed this i already have planned and written phase 2 and 3 characters and stories so look out for those and well i will see you real soon!!

[chenvs3000]

The Periodic Table of Elements and Whales.

I once remembered the entire periodic table of elements because of the “Periodic Table Song” song on YouTube posted by asapScience... if you know you know. In grade 11 my chemistry teacher (Mr. Blackmore) had an end-of the year competition where the student who could remember the most elements from the periodic table won a box of Timbits... safe to say I memorized the song and I won. Mr. Blackmore and Mrs. Hargrove were my two science teachers in high school and they are probably the two most influential teachers I have ever had, especially in respect to my academic path in life. Mrs. Hargrove wrote her own songs to help us remember the Kreb’s cycle – which is quite literally awful to learn about and memorize. I have always used acronyms, mnemonics, and acoustics to help me remember information. Both these teachers used these tools to help teach lessons. But of course, not everyone learns the same so maybe I have more aural learning style. Musical learning style, also known as the aural (auditory-musical-rhythmic), is one of Howard Gardner's eight types of intelligence defined in his theory of Multiple Intelligences. Songs are a great way to make words and facts stick in people's brains. Songs can be extremely catchy, and I’m sure you’ve asked yourself how you can remember every word to the That’s So Raven theme song (or whatever your favourite TV show was as a kid), but you can’t remember half the details we learned about in first year physics even though we were tested on them. Songs can be catchy and make us remember the lyrics long after the performance is over.  

Capture from the visuals used in asapScience’s Periodic Table Song, available here on YouTube. 

Tilden's 4th principle of interpretation states that “the chief aim of interpretation is not instruction, but provocation”. It can be difficult to spread a message about a boring topic, or something the majority of society seems not to care about.  More, maybe the content itself isn’t uninteresting, but you just really want to get a key point across. Provocation is an approach use to invoke certain emotions or reactions, and can capture your audience’s attention. Music plays a larger role in nature interpretation other than just providing a catchy sequence of words for us to remember. It promotes a response because it – on some basic human level – connects to our emotions. We can’t touch or hear sounds like we can a tree or a rock – but we can feel it. The emotions tied to music are what make it a powerful tool. Don’t believe me? The whales basically saved themselves by singing.

In the mid-20th century, whalers were causing whale populations to dwindle – killing more than 50,000 a year. But in the 1960’s, underwater equipment recorded a sound that had never been heard before – whale songs. These songs changed and had distinguishable themes and emotions that changed over time. Robert Payne, one of the early scientists who helped share this discovery said; "These sounds are, with no exception that I can think of, the most evocative, most beautiful sounds made by any animal on Earth,". Any repeating sound is technically part of a composed song. Crickets and birds use songs, but the songs sung by whales are arguably the most complex and emotional songs sung by any animal on earth.  

"Do you make cat food out of composer-poets? I think that's a crime." - Robert Payne, biologist/cetologist

Robert Payne gave one of the whale recordings to Judy Collins. I know her best from the famously North American song “This Land is Your Land” (which in and of itself is a perfect example of how music can capture the essence and history of a place and era all at once – but that’s a blog post for another time. This song takes me right back to bonfire at my cottage and nights at summer camp). "It was very emotional," she says. "Angst for being a human being on a planet where they also live. Guilt for doing what we do to them. And that they're so smart and they have been here so long, and they certainly might have some insights about what we could do to live a better way.” In the following decade, she included a song called "Farewell to Tarwathie" on her 1970 album Whales and Nightingales. This song is an adaptation of a traditional whale song and it actually features whales singing throughout the song! The record was a hit and introduced millions of people to the songs sung by humpback whales. In the same year she released her album, Capitol Records released Payne's recording of humpback whale songs, which is still the best-selling natural sounds album to date. Songs like Judy Collins’ "Farewell to Tarwathie", and the songs sung by the whales themselves, show that there is both music in nature and nature in music. And the best part – the campaign using the whale songs worked so well that only 5 countries still hunt whales today.

"It certainly was a huge factor in convincing us that the whales were an intelligent species here on planet Earth and actually made music, made art, created an aesthetic." - Former Greenpeace director Rex Weyler

Sources:

Beck, L., Cable, T., & Knudson, D. (2018). Interpreting cultural and natural heritage for a better world. Sagamore-Venture Publishing.

Hooykaas, A. (2021). Unit 7: Nature Interpretation Through Music. In Lecture Notes. University of Guelph. https://courselink.uoguelph.ca/d2l/le/content/666945/viewContent/2593375/View

May, M. (2014). Recordings That Made Waves: The Songs That Saved The Whales. National Public Radio. https://www.npr.org/2014/12/26/373303726/recordings-that-made-waves-the-songs-that-saved-the-whales

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #396

“every time i leave, you say you won’t be there, & you’re always there”

So, is it gif with a hard G or soft G? I used to say "jif," but now I pronounce it as "gif." If you use libraries, what is the largest overdue fine you’ve ever had? *shrug* Do you ever borrow things other than books from the library? I remember back in the day, they used to offer educational computer games, and I bought a dinosaur one as a kid that I was madly obsessed with. Are there still any movie rental places left where you live? Just Redbox things outside of some stores. Do you ever buy secondhand books (or DVDs, video games, CDs)? Yeah; Ebay is my friend. Or do you prefer them to be brand new? I mean yeah, but it's not a massive deal to me so long the thing is operational or not falling apart. Do you ever write fanfic? Of what? Nah. Do you ever READ fanfic? Of what? Also nah. Do you have a favorite classical composer? No. Have you ever had multicolored/rainbow hair? No, but I would LOVE to. What kind of hats, if any, do you like to wear? I don't wear hats. What is your #1 deal-breaker with friendships? If you're manipulative, byyyyyeeeee~ Who is your favorite character on Bob’s Burgers and why? (If you watch it) I've seen some episodes, but I don't actually watch it. Have you ever had a retro celebrity crush? Like a crush on an “old” celebrity who was most famous a long time ago or is long dead? Audrey Hepburn, for one, is drop-dead GORGEOUS. When you buy/receive new clothes, do you instantly wear them or wash first? It depends on what I bought and where it's from. What’s the weirdest item you’ve seen for sale on Ebay? Idk. Are parents to blame for what their kids do on the Internet? No; kids make their own choices. I do, however, believe the parents should monitor what they do until they reach a certain degree of maturity, as well as the child's history with what they've done on the Internet. Do you use acronyms to remember things? Sometimes. Do you take pills like Tylenol for the littlest aches and pains? No. Only if I'm really in pain will I take Ibuprofen/Advil. Don’t you think Crocs are ugly? Big time. I don't know why they're in vogue now when they used to be so widely hated. When was the last time you went roller skating? Oh, it's been years. Who was your favorite Ninja Turtle? I was never into the franchise. Horror flicks make you: laugh, scream, or squirm? I prefer the ones that make you uneasy. I'm not a big fan of the nasty ones, and I want to feel on edge when I'm watching a horror film, but it's EXTREMELY rare I become legitimately scared. If you could become a doctor, what would you specialize in? Uhhhh. Maybe genetic disorders. What’s the cutest thing a little kid has ever said to/in front of you? I'm sure it was something my niece or nephew said, but I'm unsure of what. They've said many adorable things. Did any characters from TV shows scare you as a kid? Which one(s)? FUCKING KING RAMSES FROM COURAGE THE COWARDLY DOG. FUCK he gave me nightmares. What’s the saddest thing you’ve heard on the news recently? I was very saddened to hear about the giraffe that died giving birth. Do you believe that acupuncture works? I'm not educated enough on this subject. Have you ever been hypnotized? No, and I don't believe it's possible to be. What’s the first food you can smell when you enter the mall? The soft pretzels, omg. That little stand is my favorite part of our local mall. They make DELICIOUS pretzels. What is the worst hurt you’ve ever experienced? Jason leaving. Are huge muscles gross or sexy? Like serious body builders, it's gross to me. I prefer a natural musculature. Have you ever fished and caught something weird? I know I have, but what isn't coming to mind. Do you use an umbrella when it rains? Unless it is absolutely pouring, no. Do you like getting caught in the rain? No. What is the hardest part of cleaning for you? It requires physical exertion and I am INCREDIBLY weak with non-existent stamina. Do you have any fake flowers in your room? No. Do you own any succulents? No. What is your favorite thing about spring? The only thing I like about spring are all the flowers. What is something you find hard to draw? HANDS. UGH. Was it sunny for your senior prom pictures? Sigh. It was a beautiful sunset. I REALLY wish I didn't delete all those pictures from existence. Have you ever seen a double rainbow? I've seen like, a triple rainbow. What’s one thing you want to learn how to make? Your ordinary meals. I really want to be able to cook my own food from scratch. Do you have stomach issues? Maybe TMI, but it's been questioned but not fully examined that I may have IBS. My stomach is very sensitive. When was the last time you apologized and didn’t mean it? I'm not sure. Do you prefer to be the “talker” or the “listener” in a conversation? The listener. What’s a movie that you think everyone should see? Johnny Got His Gun. If you could have any hair color, what color would you want? Either pastel pink or light creamsicle orange. When was the last time you saw your “first love”? February of 2017. Who’s the smartest person you know personally? My best guy friend Girt. What makes them so smart? He's just very intelligent. Book-smart. Are there any bands/artists that get you all emotional? Ozzy. He and his music are so important to me. What’s your favourite aunt or uncle’s first name? Robert. Have you ever done a first aid course? No. What time do you generally wake up in the morning? It varies from like, 6:00-8:30ish. If you could have one superpower, what would it be? Definitely shapeshifting. I'd love to be a druid, man. Do you ever make surveys? If so, are they long or short? No, but I combine them because I don't like surveys that are too short by my standards. When is the next time you’ll change your hairstyle? Will you color it? Honestly, probably never. I love my current hairstyle, but I most certainly plan on dyeing it maaaany more times. As a child, what was your favorite game to play? I was hooked on the first three Spyro games. I would play 'em over and over. Do any of your siblings have significant others? Do you like them? My older sister is married, and I am NOT a fan of her husband. He's WAY too conservative and bigoted and racist and misogynistic, etc. etc. He's wonderful as a dad, like holy shit he loves his kids, but his beliefs are abhorrent. Dad's daughter is also married, and her husband is awesome. Mom's eldest daughter is also married, and her husband seems cool. My brother has a fiancee that I've never met. Do you believe in the concept of global warming? No fucking shit I do. It's impossible to logically deny, especially as the years go on. When was the last time you took a picture of something? Was it yourself? I took some pictures of this beautiful hydrangea bush outside the TMS office a few days ago. When drinking soda, do you prefer bottles or cans or poured in a glass? Cans, because it stays colder. Do you wear deodorant? Um, yes? If you had a pet pig, what would you name it? Probably something very unoriginal, like Wilbur. Do you like Led Zeppelin? I LOVE "Kashmir." "Stairway to Heaven" was madly important to me, but yeah... I can't listen to it anymore. Like seriously, I haven't in years. Do you like hugs? I do. Have you read the Constitution of the United States of America? Only the Bill of Rights for school. Do you have your own computer or use a family one? I have my own laptop. Do you take out the trash? Sometimes. Is there a calendar in the room you’re in? Outdated meerkat ones. What is your best friend’s name? Sara Jane. :') Have you ever seen a real-life cop chase? Maybe? What is your favorite shape? Circles. Are pigs adorable or dirty? They're precious! And pigs are actually a lot cleaner than people think, if they're not muddy. Anything moldy in your house? Not to my knowledge. Our old house had a serious mold problem, though, which is the primary reason we had to move. Especially with Mom having cancer at the time, she needed to be in the most sterile environment possible. Have you ever been in an earthquake? No. Do you enjoy history? No. Are you watching TV right now? No, but rather GameGrumps on YT. Could you ever be a mortician? True shit, it actually doesn't seem THAT bad. Can you solve a Rubik’s cube? Never seriously tried. How many pets do you have? Just two right now. Are you more close with your mom or dad? My mom. Who is the person that has impacted your life the most? Jason. Or Mom. Have you ever had a pet fish? Yeah. Poor things, they had terrible husbandry. I've learned a hell of a lot from a YouTuber/streamer that is like obsessed with fish about just how misinformed people are on how to take care of various fish. Your goldfish in that little bowl died for a reason, you know. Do you believe in ghosts? Yes. Do you prefer tea or coffee? Both suck. Have you ever vaped? No. How did your parents meet? They were co-workers. What was your first word? "Dada." Have you ever had a kinky dream about a celebrity? ... I mighta lmao. When was the last time you had Nutella? A long time ago. It reeeeaaaally needs to stay out of my house, because I will eat it straight out of the jar. Name someone with a sexy sounding voice. So I don't know where this was, but Mark was once credited in something as "if chocolate had a voice" and I was like YOU FUCKIN BET YOUR SWEET ASS.

[christinesficrecs]

Ok, hey, I've been reading through your posts and the fics you rec throughout the last few weeks and as you're always super nice and do super good recs I wanted to ask if you have some carbon-based (canon-divergent is very ok) mutual (oblivious?) pining fics? That might not be the right term but I hope you still know what I mean :/ Thank you very much, I love your fic recs very much and you're certainly also a blessing for fanfic writers :) :D

Hey!

Well I may have taken liberty with canon divergent and then got carried away in general. 🤦🏻‍♀️

Everyone Needs a Little Mischief in Their Life by isthatbloodonhisshirt (wasterella) | 17.9K

Finally, against his better judgement, and having gone in circles for much too long, he blurted out, “Who is my soulmate?”

The Witch looked disappointed, like he’d fucked up. Like he’d fucked up bad.

But she answered anyway.

“Mischief.”

Derek stared at her, not understanding, because what? “That’s not a name,” he insisted.

By a Law Divine by mirrorkill | 23.1K

Okay, so, kissing Stiles. That’s a weird thing that Derek’s doing now. He has no idea where it’s even coming from, especially considering bickering and fighting is their usual state of existence.And then he does find out where it’s coming from: A curse that’s making everyone in town kiss someone they have mutual feelings for.…yeah, Derek’s not even sure why he’s surprised by that.

Cincinnati, or Anywhere With You by yodasyoyo | 7.1K

Somehow in the months that followed it became a regular thing: once a week they’d meet up, watch the game., drink a few beers. They’d talk shit about whichever sports team they were watching. Then John would politely ask how Cora was doing, and Derek would ask after Stiles, and pretend that was just politeness too.

This Is Me by HappyJuicyfruit | 28.9K

Stiles gripped to Derek’s shirt, attempting to stay on his feet as he was manhandled. He whipped his head around, trying to spot whatever had Derek on the defense. He froze when his eyes landed on two tall, greenish, figures standing right in front of them.

“No need to growl, dog. We are not here to harm you.” One of them said. Her… his…? Their voice sounded like music, echoing in the trees. They were both dressed in long silky robes, and they had the posture of royalty.

It’s In Our Lungs, Our Blood by xxjinchuurikixx | 9.9K

Derek gets hit by some sex pollen, and only Stiles can work it out of his system.

Open Your Eyes, Don’t Walk Blind by Ragga | 14.9K

The Sheriff of Beacon Hills could be called many things but willingly blind was not one of them. When the supernatural world was shoved before his eyes and he found his son right in the middle of it, there was no other choice for him but to follow in Stiles’ footsteps. And he did, willingly; there was nothing in the world he wouldn’t do for him.

He just wasn’t expecting to find out the things he did while learning how to swim in the deep.

Where to Search for Snow by suburbanmotel | 8.9K

Stiles and his Gigantic Repressed Feelings accidentally affect the weather. A lot. Like. A lot.

i wait for you like a lonely house by bleepobleep | 4.5K

Derek isn’t sure why he buys the house.He doesn’t need the space, that much is certain. While it’s not as big as the one Derek grew up in, something about the cheerful yellow paint and the wide staircase (with banisters wide enough for children to slide down) draws him in.

You’d Be So Good To Come Home To by SylvieW | 5K

In Stiles’ final year of college, Derek decides to rebuild the Hale house. He keeps asking for Stiles’ opinion on the house plans. Stiles doesn’t realize that Derek is building the house with a mate in mind.

Solitary Animals by Mollyamory (Molly) | 13.6K

In which the Alpha pack wants to take something important away from the Hale pack, and there’s only one sure way to keep Stiles safe. Negotiations of a personal nature ensue.

declarations of intent and other acronyms by bleepobleep | 2.4K

Stiles accidentally declares himself Derek’s mate after a mixup at a supernatural conference. Whoops.

If You’re Going Through Hell (Keep Going) | 48.5K

Stiles thought everything leading up to Allison’s death was hell, but he was wrong. Spending senior year dealing with the pack’s dismissal of him while secretly training to be Deaton’s replacement was hell. Feeling guilty and hating himself for what the Nogitsune did was hell. Being in love with someone who would never love him back was hell. Well, if you’re going through hell, keep going.

[thepanicoffice]

A Fragile Peace: Armistice after the Great Culture War

[...]

It’s no secret that I do not have my finger on the pulse of our age. I can, given time, remember to hold a mirror up to its mouth to see if it’s still breathing, but that’s about it. This is largely due my being a seething cauldron of self-regard and venality, but it may be for other equally valid reasons too. I don’t really care.

But that means this esteemed chronicle is falling woefully behind. The last time we broke a story, it was about my torrid affair with the then-Minister of Defence, which I only revealed because, due to an unrelated matter, I needed a public alibi. Sadly, I cannot always rely on my own sexual allure to the political classes to push us to the forefront of news.

The only way to get ahead in the publishing game is to start commissioning stories on things you assume are inevitably going to happen. That’s why I have asked our war correspondent to report back from the frontlines of the impending societal rupture that will define our post-pandemic world. I present to you, from several years hence, the Armistice of the Great Culture War.

[...]

Words by Lydia Happenstance, Culture War Correspondent

Last Friday, on the third day of the third month, 2025, after nearly one and half years of confused and needless violence, the guns, sirens, and opinion pieces fell silent to mark the beginning of Armistice and an end to the Great Culture War.

It began as a battle of words between the UK Conservative Party and an enemy that they had themselves largely created; a Frankenstein’s monster stitched together from scraps of Daily Telegraph premium content, animated by fears of civil unrest and falling house prices.

Their repeated assertions that you can’t say anything anymore, echoed and expanded upon by their outriders in the national press, culminated in the creation of the British Bastion of Culture [1], a paramilitary group whose mission statement was as emphatic as it was baffling: ‘To save Winston Churchill from the Marxists’.

Seeing this as a provocation, a protagonist in the Culture War gradually coalesced. After dozens of public meetings and committees of varying degrees of formality, the People’s Vanguard was established on a Zoom conference call in October 2021. Composed largely of sullen academics, irascible Twitter activists and musicians who have been unable to find meaningful employment since the COVID-19 pandemic, the Vanguard – known more commonly as ‘The Wokeists’ – began to prosecute a bloody and merciless campaign of tolerance on an unsuspecting populace.

They became known for their guerrilla tactics, affixing plaques of detailed historical context about the role of slavery and structural racism onto statues, buildings, and Cabinet Ministers in a series of daring night-time raids. It was said of them that ‘the armies of the Woke never sleep’.

Retaliation from the BBC was swift and unforgiving, as they took control of local television stations and forced broadcasters to play the German episode of Fawlty Towers, which they mistakenly thought was deemed offensive by ‘the Lefties’.

By the end, and possibly from the very beginning, it was clear that many of the combatants no longer understood what they were fighting for, only what they were fighting against. The War became an end in itself, rather than a means to any kind of glorious future. Ultimately, it was attrition and the exponential increase in casualties that made a ceasefire inevitable.

The Armistice was signed in Droitwich, for reasons unknown. It was attended by the democratic committee of the Vanguard, led by their Tribune, the distressingly middle-class Marxist poet, Rupert Trebuchet MA, and by BBC leader and regular Spiked columnist, Sebastian Spitegills. No eye contact was made or pleasantries exchanged as the parties, mediated by the comedian Michael Macintyre – chosen for being so banal and anodyne as to be a wholly neutral party in the Culture War – hammered out the terms of peace.

The Treaty of Droitwich runs to some 270 pages with many complex agreements made. No off-colour jokes are to be told below the 28th parallel, meaning that you will now have to travel North of Ipswich if you want to watch a Carry On film or reference the name of the dog in Dambusters. Equally, those who wish to use the term ‘problematic’ or write a Guardian long read about culturally appropriative Halloween costumes will be obliged to travel to the South of this line that formally marks the schism in our divided nation.

Both parties have agreed to stop using the word ‘triggered’, whether ironically or unironically.

Perhaps most controversially, but in the spirit of compromise, both parties have agreed that certain issues, such as trans rights and the utilitarian calculus of whether or not Churchill was a net positive to the world, will be uniformly responded to with the dictum: “It’s actually very complicated actually.”

The Treaty also allowed for the exchange of prisoners of war, many of whom have been away from their uncomprehending and slightly embarrassed families for many months. Sadly, deaths in the POW camps of both sides have been so high that very few will be returning home. The Bastionites, considering hanging to be a tradition that uniquely represents ‘the very best of British’, have been enthusiastically performing summary executions since hostilities first began. The Wokeists took a less violent but more tedious approach, instead forcing captured fighters to undergo Tesco’s corporate Awareness and Sensitivity Training. Many of the BBC soldiers, however, preferred to take their own lives rather than learn what a microaggression is or how to avoid speaking disparagingly to BAME colleagues. Deaths number in the thousands.

The UK Labour Party hailed this historic accord. Speaking in the House of Commons, party leader Sir Keir Starmer was forceful in his praise for the Treaty, saying: “This is an event that has occurred and we recognise that.”

Prime Minister Michael Gove, when asked for comment, responded obliquely: “My mandibles are sharp and my belly hungry. Bring in the infants that I might slake my abhorrent thirsts.”

Despite the progress that has been made, many observers are predicting that the peace that has been brokered will be a fragile one. On Sunday morning, on the outskirts of the Sussex village of Piddinghoe, a small skirmish broke out over whether the War should be commemorated with red or white poppies. The word ‘Imperialist’ was spray-painted on a telephone box before a library was set on fire in quick reprisal. Many more such incidents can be expected before peace truly settles in.

There are even reports that some will not accept the hard-won peace. Former Commandant Laurence Fox, the second highest ranking General of the BBC army, is said to be stationed in a bunker on the Isle of Man, where he has either not been told or simply refuses to acknowledge the ceasefire. He will not be alone. No contact has been made with Julia Hartley-Brewer’s submarine for more than three weeks.

Speaking to civilians – those who have been victims of the violence, displaced by the upheavals, or simply mildly inconvenienced by having the same episode of Fawlty Towers repeated on their televisions for the last year – they remain unclear as to why any of this happened in the first place.

“I don’t understand any of it,” said Clive Purloin, a roadworks engineer, who was caught briefly in the crossfire as rival groups clashed in Liverpool over whether Ken Dodd was a fascist whose statue should be toppled. “Really. Not a clue.”

It is a view shared by virtually everyone.

The signing of the Treaty of Versailles. It was like this but much, much stupider. ----------------

[1] Only belatedly realising, to their incandescent, bovine fury, that this meant they shared an acronym with an organisation purportedly representing everything that they despised. Attempts to rename the group were prevented by them having entered into a two-year contract for the website domain

[ultravioletproxy]

[Sona] Hine Cross (Proxy OC)

I've finally done it. I finally finished an actual sona reference up as well as finally completing a updated digital reference of HINE! I'm so very pleased with this and how my art has progress since his original reference, all those years ago... I actually was able to get up the energy to go fully in depth with his information and soon I'll get to his backstory comic going.

❖⊗❖⊗❖

Personality/ Mental State:

Basic summary; Hine is a VERY complex character. He has many layers to his personality which I'll try my best to explain. He is a quiet person with a lot on his mind, constantly bombarded with various thoughts which makes it hard for him to keep track of all that's going on around him. Hine "Zones/ Spaces Out" occasionally and does not realize that you're talking to him, he might even not respond to you in the middle of a conversation. All of these things may come off as rude; but he really doesn't mean to be.  Later on in his timeline/ as he grows up, Hine becomes much more of an unstable person, laughing a little too loudly at things (and volume control in general), walking off in the middle of conversations, and tends to get a bit unhinged...

Hine has several mental disorders that can effect his personality:

⊗-Autism: Doesn't pick up on social cues, and it takes him a while to think of a response when in a conversion, in turn he pauses and stutters. With autism comes anxiety, if in a high strung social environment or decision, Hine may have a break down (Sitting down and grabbing his shoulders tightly), He does not let people see him break down, he will go to a private area to try and cool down before coming out into view and acting perfectly fine. This luckily, doesn't happen often as he's trying to cope with his social anxiety. During a conversation Hine may accidentally say something that he doesn't mean, like a mess up of words(Saying something unintentionally mean as he just didn't think how it would sound when spoken or combining two words together.)

⊗-Compulsive liar: He doesn't ever mean to lie, a lot of the times he feels as though a lie is safer than telling the truth and before he even knows what he's done, the person has accepted the lie as truth and he's too afraid to tell them that his response was false. This stemmed from abuse during his life at the orphanage. He currently is trying hard to pull away from this.

⊗-Minorly a Paranoid Schizophrenic: Sometime this disorder makes him feels like everything and everyone has an ulterior motive, even though the thought is completely irrational. Hine mentally beats himself up for having these kinds of thoughts as he feels like he's betraying his loved ones/ friends. The thoughts themselves tend to be of a violently disgusting nature as they try to convince him that everyone is lying. He rarely witnesses hallucinations, mostly just little shadowy things in his peripheral vision.

⊗-Hypochondriac: Do to being mixed with a Slender, and his fear of dying, he constantly feels like his body will just give out on him, or that any sickness no matter how minor will end up killing him in one way or another, he's very paranoid of random aches and pain, irrationally telling himself to accept the fact that he's just going to die.

⊗-Sociopathic Tendencies: Hine has a hard time grasping that other people are just like him and have emotions, thoughts, and a consciousness. He tries quite hard to convince himself that other people are essentially sentient like him.

⊗-Unintentionally Manipulative: When living in the orphanage Hine was treated poorly due to his lack of social abilities and therefore was mostly ignored by the caretakers and fellow children. He desperately tried to figure out ways in order to be able to get a break from the constant chores and duties that he was given since he would not participate in being social with the others. He(not exactly intentionally) developed ways to read people in order to get what he wanted, again, not in a particularly malicious manner. More of just a way of survival.

Habits/ Quirks, Likes, and Dislikes:

⊗-Quirks/ Habits: Hine has quite a few funny little habits. One being collecting, he just adores collecting various things from silverware, to plushies, to seashells, really anything he finds the least bit intriguing and holding sentimental value. He is a little bit of a pack-rat you could say. He also has a bit of a compulsion to essentially "preen" or "groom" himself. For instance; cleaning under his nails, picking fuzz off a shirt, or even idly pulling hairs. He also has a lot of trouble finishing hot drinks, particularly coffee as he tends to forget about them, they get cold, and then he's too lazy to heat them up. Hine is mostly nocturnal as bright lights make him disorientated. Another not so good habit include Stress Smoking developed from watching a certain Slender and a friend smoke and seeing how it relaxed them. He occasionally delves into cannabis (Once Mr.KittyKitty comes around) due to the many medical benefits it has, such as anxiety relief, being more talkative, painkillers, motivation, or to calm him down.

⊗-Likes: He loves long walks alone in nature, particularly next to streams/ rivers either in silence or with music. He loves listening to the wind through the pines, the birds chirping, the sound of rain hitting the underbrush, and classical music. He loves pickled foods/ the taste of vinegar, as well as eating, and cooking in general. He tends to be rather indecisive about his favorite foods as he likes way too many, although salt and vinegar chips, popcorn, pomegranates, and cherries are a few of his favorites. His favorite drinks are Earl Grey Tea and Shirley Temples. Animals he adores are Bears, Raccoons, Ferrets, Ravens, Barn Owls, Coral Snakes, and Cats. He absolutely loves to draw, he makes his own characters and story lines, he also delves into other artistic feats such as crafting, painting with water colors, and sewing. A good book/ movie in the supernatural or horror genre will keep him content for hours. He loves dark humor, and coming up with ridiculous jokes(Blaming that on L.J.), and has a penchant for spouting the most random of facts. He really loves to talk to others and tries his best to keep up with them even though he has a hard time figuring out a response a lot of the time. Lastly, he has a weird enjoyment for the smell of disinfectant chemicals and has a particularly strange fixation on tornadoes...

⊗-Dislikes: He very much dislikes crowded areas, physical interactions, cities, thunder/ loud noises. He's not too fond of overly cutsie things. He can't stand highly sweetened foods or drinks (Candy, Cakes, Chocolate); once in a while/ a craving is fine, but he'd much rather take a bite of fruit. He doesn't care for baking all that much except for making breads at which he's none too shabby at. He doesn't care for bright colors unless they're mixed with dark ones.

Relationships:

⊗-Significant Other: Is in a delightfully happy relationship with flannelRaptors's Character, Johnny.

⊗-Slenders: When he was young, Hine ran away from the orphanage, he found his way into the forest where lovely Splendorman welcomed him with open arms and tendrils. Soon after, Slenderman himself took interest in Hine and became some sort of a strange father figure to him. The other Slenders joined in with helping take care of Hine. Trender helped his practical artistic side, while Splendor helped him understand his emotions, social cues, and tame his wild mental health state, Slender was his stable rock, and Offender schooled him in street smarts and how to deal with the "real" world.

⊗-Other Creepies: As a quiet person, Hine mostly sticks to himself, however if the opportunity presents itself, he absolutely loves talking to and learning about other people's pasts, Likes, etc.

Basic Background Summary:

⊗-Past: When Hine was young his parents were murdered by a trusted family friend they’d met from the church they attended. This person in turn, kidnapped and tortured Hine for quite some time, until Hine was eventually freed. However, as a mentally scarred young boy, shipping him off to an orphanage didn't really bode too well and he eventually ran away to join the Slenders' care and eventually became a "Proxy" to Slenderman.

Basic Background Summary:

⊗-Appearance: Hine has many abilities as shown above, however there are a lot more details and catches than what's written on the reference sheet. As the acronym may explain, Hine does not have any eyes. In an accident in which Hine almost died, Slenderman gave Hine an essential blood transfusion. The Slender blood, being incredibly aggressive, took over a good chunk of Hine's DNA giving him not only Eyeless vision, but also tendrils, an extra set of blood vessels, and a whole new horrible form.

Slender Affected Abilities:

-Hine can still see, but he now has what is called "Slender Vision" which is a 360-degree sight range, meaning he can see in all directions at once, ultimately maddening when first getting used to it. This is one of the reasons why Hine is constantly distracted. The range of sight and focus can be altered however it is rather difficult to do so as he was not born with the ability. Most of the Slenders can see a good mile or so around them while Hine has a shorter, about 50 ft range. Hine, not used to his new vision, rarely turns his head to look at objects that he is focusing on, due to there not being a focal point of eyes, therefore he tends to come off even more blank and emotionless than he really is.

-Hine's tendrils are hidden beneath his skin in what are called "Ports". Hine has a total of eight "ports", 4 on each side of his back. The tendrils can painfully be pushed through his skin at will, ultimately piercing through his back. He's supposed to constantly leave them out so the holes can seal up around them (much like a piercing would), but to do that he would have to keep out of sight from all other non-slender beings, as him being half slender is a well-guarded secret. The tendrils can lengthen and split apart to form thinner smaller pieces due to their "braided nature". However, in the early stages all of Hine's slenderification, his abilities are all INCREDIBLY clumsy.

-Other attributes Hine’s gained include, but are not limited to: heightened versions of all the senses, Moderately increased strength and speed. A bit of an iron stomach (ex: can eat raw meat), and more advanced healing rates (the less severe the slower it heals).

-With all these benefits came quite a few negatives. For instance, until he gets used to it, Hine's depth perception and hand eye coordination is completely off. His two blood types sometimes mix and therefore cause him to become incredibly ill for short periods of times, his varying blood colors also result in a pale yellowish grey complexion. Hine’s body has an unnatural slimness to it; he experiences continuous, nonstop increase in height in addition to having disproportionately long and lengthened arms and legs.(He has to make his own custom clothing.) Due to these things Hine suffers from minor growing pains as well as occasional cravings for human meat/ flesh. (Inherited from the dietary nature of the Slenders)

I applaud you if you read this all! Here's a TLDR version of this massive piece:

Hine is a mentally and physically scarred orphan who grew up with all the Slenders as his family. He came close to death at some point, but Slenderman saved him by transfusing his own blood into Hine, resulting in a well-hidden secret. Hine got really cool abilities with a few pretty bad side effects and is now an official Slenderman Proxy.

❖⊗❖⊗❖

Artwork, Concepts & Character © to RoneOmbre

⊗-Terms of Service-⊗

[tardistimes]

Change: Chapter Two

Summary:  In the aftermath of X-Men: First Class, Moira MacTaggert struggles to regain her memories but perhaps with the help of Nick Fury she may come closer to discovering the truth.

Fandoms: X-Men (Prequels), Marvel Cinematic Universe, Marvel (Comics), Agent Carter

Word Count: 3,976

Chapter 1 | Chapter 2 | Chapter 3 | Chapter 4 | Chapter 5 | Chapter 6 | Chapter 7 | Chapter 8 | TBC

Sitting ramrod straight with her fingers tightly interwoven in her lap, Moira waited to be called into Agent Fury’s office.

The walk back into the building she had so unceremoniously left only three days before was nerve-racking enough. Waiting for an interview, which should have started several minutes ago, with one of the highest-ranking officials in the CIA was enough to make her heart attempt to escape the confines of her rib cage.

The man who had approached her in the parking lot – Nick Fury, as she now knew – wanted to recruit her for an organisation she had never heard of, worked in a part of the building she had never known existed, and was permanently tailed by a small team of staff who seemed capable of glaring the fur off a monkey. Today was no exception, as he approached his office with several people in tow, two of whom looked ready to march into battle rather than walk the halls at Langley.

“MacTaggert.” He said calmly, his staff dissipating as he spoke her name. “With me.”

Following him into his sparsely decorated office, Moira dropped into the seat he waved her towards while he shrugged off his coat. Glancing out the window, Fury seemed interested in something happening downstairs and looked there thoughtfully for a moment before giving her his attention.

“Why did you resign from the agency?” Fury asked bluntly, although Moira had a sense he already knew everything that had happened.

“I think resign is a very nice way to put it.” Moira experimented, and when Fury’s lip twitched infinitesimally she was confident he at least knew she had called McCone an ass. “I didn’t feel that I could make any more progress within the organisation, sir.”

“You don’t work here anymore, MacTaggert. You don’t have to call me sir.” He said, leaning against the windowsill. “And I agree with you. The CIA is meant to deal with all external threats to the country. But if anything, these recent events seem to have proven that the CIA is perhaps not the organisation best equipped to deal with these... shall we call them unexplainable events?”

“I don’t think I’m the right person to comment on that.”

“On the contrary. At this moment in time, I think you are one of the few people who can. Given your recent history and your interactions with Mr Xavier. I’m quite interested to hear your judgement on the situation – about how the CIA handled it.”

“You know what happened to me?”

“I dare say at this point I know more than you do.”

“That’s not exactly an accomplishment.” Moira scoffed, shifting in her seat uncomfortably. “Look, I don’t understand why I’m here. I know you said you work with a group called S.H.I.E.L.D, yet no one I know seems to have heard of it.”

“You’re not friends with anyone who has that level of clearance.” Fury said, finally moving to sit at his desk after he gave up looking for... whatever he had been looking for outside. “I work for S.H.I.E.L.D and act as a liaison with this agency. And others. I’m not usually based here but I have eyes in this building. And I’ve worked in this capacity long enough to recognise you as a potential asset.”

Moira slowly shook her head and glanced around the room. There was none of the usual CIA insignia that was in her supervisor’s offices. Then again there was no other symbol, nothing to give her any indication of what S.H.I.E.L.D was and certainly not what it did.

“S.H.I.E.L.D was established after the Second World War and is a subsidiary of the United Nations.” Fury said, watching her carefully. “The name stands for Supreme Headquarters, International Espionage, Law-Enforcement Division.”

“That’s quite the mouthful.”

“Hence the acronym.” Fury deadpanned. Moira bit back a smile. “S.H.I.E.L.D came about in the wake of what was called the Super Soldiers Initiative, which was run during the war. An experimental programme launched to create an army of advanced humans who could fight the war for us. You ever heard of Captain America?”

“The comic book character?” She asked, frowning as she struggled to recall the covers of the comics her Dad had collected and the one story he had told her about the stage show he had seen while stationed in Europe. There was a vague memory of a radio show about him too. “He’s fictional.”

“Aren’t we all.” He said coolly. “I know a lot of people who doubt your story MacTaggert. After your experiences, after what you’ve seen, are you still so quick to dismiss something as fantastical just because you haven’t seen it with your own eyes?”

Fury paused, watching as his words sunk in before continuing. “S.H.I.E.L.D is the world’s answer to dealing with the unexplainable. The types of events and people that organisations such as the CIA have proven themselves incapable of dealing with in an appropriate manner.”

“Like mutants?”

“Exactly.”

“If you think the CIA is so incapable, why do you want me?” She asked, still confused about why she had been approached. “I was part of the Mutants Division. Apparently. And from what I’ve been told, we nearly started World War Three.”

“Regardless of how things ended, your work impressed us. Your ability to keep a level head, even when seeing something no one else would think possible. Being able to differentiate between those who wanted to use their abilities for good instead of presuming that anything different is something to be feared. How you were able to gain the trust of individuals who had lived their entire lives working to keep their abilities secret...”

Moira cut him off. “I don’t even remember doing any of that. I don’t even know if I did that.”

Fury leaned back in his chair and for the first time since they’d started talking, Moira felt like his full concentration was on her. The power of his stare almost made her want to squirm in her seat but she met his gaze head on. “You’re referring to Xavier’s powers. Mind control?”

“Yes.”

She felt like elaborating. Trying to explain how it feels to wonder if you have control of your mind, your body. To wonder what actions were your own and what was someone else’s. Without the memory of who Xavier was, Moira had no idea what he was like. Of what kind of person he was. It seemed like he had worked against Lehnsherr in Cuba, that he had tried to stop whatever plan had been underway. But was that because he was a good person or because he was working to keep the mutant’s existence a secret? Or because he had some other plan, another ulterior motive? Levene seemed certain that he wanted to help them, that he was kind. But Levene had never had his mind irrevocably tampered with.

In the end, she bit down on the words. She had barely been able to explain it to Levene and he knew he better than most.

“You sought out Xavier after going to the Hellfire Club, correct?”

“Yes.”

“You witnessed mutants demonstrating their powers for the first time. Tell me. What was your initial reaction when you saw them? To threaten them? To call for back up or maybe even kill them? Or, to go to the top-most expert you could find and attempt to learn more about them?”

“Sir...”

“You’re exactly what S.H.I.E.L.D needs.” He stated. ���We want you to join us.”

“As an agent?”

Fury nodded in the affirmative.

Moira hesitated. She needed a job but still, “If you’ll forgive me for saying so, sir, I think I’ve had enough of working for nefarious organisations to last me a lifetime.”

“S.H.I.E.L.D is very different from the CIA MacTaggert. Trust me on that.” He assured.

“Why should I?”

His attention fell away from her again as he glanced at his watch. Standing, he headed back over to his coat and pulled it on while Moira remained seated, unsure how to proceed.

“Some people are waiting for us that I would like you to meet.”

Frowning, Moira stubbornly stayed in her chair and repeated her question. “Why should I work for you?

“Because I can help you.” Fury replied, nonplussed by her attitude.

“Help me? Help me how?” She asked, a wave of annoyance threatening to break through her professionalism.

“Help you to get your memories back.”

Fury opened the door for her.

“You can do that?” She was eventually able to say, squeezing her eyes shut for a moment as she processed the idea that she could finally get some answers. That she could finally trust her own mind again.

“Let’s just say we have access to a lot of unusual resources that the CIA doesn’t.” Fury replied, motioning for her to go through the door. “So, MacTaggert. Do we have a deal?”

*          *          *

Glancing back at Fury as he closed the door behind her, Moira was ushered into the dark panelled, windowless conference room where several people were talking amongst themselves. A woman, British if her accent was genuine, was the first to greet her as she moved into the room.

Fury moved to sit at the head of the table and wasted no time in making introductions while everyone moved to organise themselves, depositing and sorting through the folders and files before them, a few of them finishing hushed conversations before they turned to new business.

“Moira MacTaggert, formerly of the CIA. This is Agent Carter, Mr Stark, Colonel Phillips, Dr Samberly and Dr Wilkes.” Fury said, gesturing towards each of them in turn. “Where’s Stoner?” He asked Carter.

Moira briefly felt as though she were on trial as all heads turned to face her as she took a seat, quickly assessing her before turning back to their work.  

“Mr Stark? Of Stark Industries?” Moira asked over the shuffling of papers, the name well known to her. Howard Stark was one of the most famous inventors and businessmen in the country.

“Urgent business,” Carter told Fury, explaining Director Stoner’s absence.

Stark gave Moira a roguish grin and shook her hand before taking the seat opposite her. “The one and only.”

What kind of organisation was this, Moira wondered as she took in the faces of those surrounding her. A highly decorated WWII officer, one of the world’s renowned entrepreneurs, two scientists, a female agent – something which particularly intrigued Moira after all her struggles at the CIA – and Agent Fury, one of the youngest people in the room and yet, from what she had seen so far, one who commanded huge respect.  

“Agent Carter, Colonel Phillips and Mr Stark founded S.H.I.E.L.D in the late 40s,” Fury started to explain, motioning at the unlikely trio. “S.H.I.E.L.D absorbed their previous organisation.”

“The Strategic Scientific Reserve. S.S.R. for short.” Carter clarified. “We, along with Drs Samberly and Wilkes, worked in the organisation both during and after the war. The organisation was highly classified,” she added, “as is S.H.I.E.L.D. So I expect you understand that anything we discuss with you in this meeting is also classified.”

“Of course.” Moira murmured.

Carter flipped open her CIA personnel file. “Agent Fury has recommended you as a field operative, a position I see you more than qualify for. I don’t know how much he has told you about S.H.I.E.L.D, but you ought to know that working for this organisation will involve a great deal of personal sacrifice. It’s not an easy job and the demands will often be high.”

“Miss MacTaggert.” Dr Samberly nervously asked. “We’ve reviewed files from the Mutants Division...”

“You have those files?” Moira sharply interrupted, watching as his hand unconsciously crept to rest on the papers in front of him.

The mysterious man who had apparently headed the Mutants Division, the man whose facility they had stayed in, was unknown to Moira – though she suspected McCone knew him. Still, the CIA had either been unable or unwilling to request the files which could explain what the division had done during her missing months. Files which Moira was sure would give her more details about her time with Xavier and his team of mutants. Files that could give her some answers.

“They’ll be shared with you should you agree to work with us. You’ll need clearance first, however.” Fury explained.

Thankfully working with the CIA had prepared her well for this level of bureaucratic bullshit, and her face remained impassive despite mentally raving at the idea that she needed clearance to read about her own life.

Samberly continued.

“Yes, well. The files detail your involvement in the Division and the work you contributed to its successes. And needless to say, we are... intrigued,” his eyes jumped around as if looking for confirmation that that was the correct term to use, “by Mr Xavier’s abilities. And those of the other mutants detailed in these files. There are reports of a shapeshifter – which is substantiated by footage – someone capable of manipulating and generating electromagnetic fields, and teleportation. While we have seen...” again his eyes jumped, this time to Dr Wilkes who nodded in encouragement, “people with, frankly unbelievable abilities, they were often unsustainable. Barring the odd case. To see people who have had powers since birth and have relative control over them is something we haven’t seen in large numbers before.”

“And from what we’ve learned they’re not only a growing community but now they’re coming together and forming their own sides.” The Colonel concluded. “Charles Xavier and,” he consulted the papers before him, “Erik Lehnsherr, appear to have opposing views on how mutants should engage with humans. According to these files, Lehnsherr seems to believe in mutant superiority and is opposed to any form of coexistence.”

“At one time he apparently referred to mutants as homo superior. That’s according to the division heads personal notes,” Wilkes interjected.

“Which causes us some concern, although we’ve seen no activity from him since the beach in Cuba. Xavier, on the other hand, seems to believe coexistence is possible.” Colonel Phillips went on. “And that’s certainly an outcome we would like to see as well.”

“So, you want to reach out to them. To Xavier and his... friends.” Moira asked slowly.

She knew that her role in the Mutants Division was the main reason she was being recruited, however, it had failed to occur to her that S.H.I.E.L.D could want her to resume her previous work. To establish communication with the mutants.

If they would let her in without wiping her mind again.

“And of course we want to monitor Lehnsherr, to see if he will develop into a greater threat.”

Moira resisted the urge to touch her neck at Phillips remark, and the faded mark from where Lehnsherr had tried to kill her with her own dog tags. “So you help me get my memories back and in return, I tell you everything I know about Xavier and Lehnsherr?”

“We want more than intelligence,” Carter answered. “You have a unique experience. Not only are you the only, potential, member of our organisation to meet mutants, you were also present to see them come together. You worked alongside Xavier and Lehnsherr as they recruited for the Mutants Division. We don’t know how much information your memories will even reveal. But we do know that you have a prior relationship with many of the people we will be reaching out to. That will go a long way in earning their trust and establishing a relationship between Xavier’s side of this faction and S.H.I.E.L.D.”

Thinking carefully for a moment, Moira looked at the three founders who sat beside each other.

“What do you want from the mutants? Once you make contact.” She asked, unable to explain her sudden wave of... protectiveness? “I don’t even know what S.H.I.E.L.D does – except what you told me before, that you deal with the unexplainable. What does ‘deal with’ even mean, that you want to study them? Use them as agents to fight your battles? Like the Mutant Division did?”

The way Phillips’ eyebrow quirked suggested he wanted exactly that, though apparently he was outvoted on the matter.

“The S.S.R only ever had a handful of operatives in its ranks who possessed inhuman abilities,” Carter said evenly. “S.H.I.E.L.D is the same. Our main purpose – our founding principle – is to protect. Whether that is to protect one man from another or to protect the entire planet against a hostile force. S.H.I.E.L.D maintains global security but that doesn’t mean we just protect humans. We also protect enhanced individuals. We don’t want to experiment on mutants or harm them if they pose no threat to us. And, from what we have learned about Xavier, he seems to pose little threat to the general populace.”

“Barring wiping the occasional person’s memory.” Moira rebutted.

“Without your knowledge, we have no reason to know why he did this,” Carter said. “But we do know he faces potential hostility from Lehnsherr and from hostile members of our species; people who don’t understand what mutants are and who may fear them because of that ignorance. It certainly gives mutants a reason to try and stay hidden. S.H.I.E.L.D can provide support if required and if not, we will leave them in peace.”

“So long as they don’t threaten anyone else’s safety,” Phillips added darkly.

Moira nodded, glancing at the six faces that were watching her intently. They seemed eager to establish a connection with the mutants: they had to be to assemble such a committee to talk to one potential recruit. But she still wasn’t confident that was their only motive.

“How do you plan to get my memories back?” She asked curiously.

Stark leaned forward slightly, taking the lead. “We need to run some tests first. Scans, blood samples,” he waved his hand, “those will determine whether there was any damage to the brain tissue, which has caused your memories to be permanently lost. We’ll also do some psychological assessments to see if there is a natural key to restoring your memories. They could have been blocked or his powers could have removed them completely.”

“So there is a chance it’s permanent?” Moira asked, her stomach dropping with dread. That was what she had feared. That her mind was damaged, perhaps beyond repair.

“Nothing is gone forever. If his powers are purely mental, I doubt he could permanently destroy the synapses. It’s more likely that he’s blocked them somehow.” Stark replied. “And even if the tests do reveal the worst, I think you’ll find we possess some unique technology that could be of use.”

Wilkes spoke up. “We have our labs set up if you would be willing to sit some tests today? I understand it’s getting late and you will want to get home...”

“Tonight will be fine,” Moira said, straightening in her chair. “What do you need?”

The three scientists opened their mouths, looking eager to start, but Phillips hastily interrupted. “Dr Wilkes, why don’t you go with Stark and Samberly to the lab and get everything you need set up. Carter will show MacTaggert the way in just a moment.”

“Of course,” Wilkes said, the three of them hastily collecting their files before half marching out the door. At least someone was looking forward to these tests.

Wilkes cast Carter a look at before shutting the door, although she didn’t appear to notice.

Phillips flipped open one of his files and slid some papers across the desk to Moira.

“What are these, release forms?”

“No. Though I’m sure the eggheads will have plenty of those for you to sign when you go downstairs.” He said, his voice rumbling good-naturedly.

Pulling the files toward her, Moira started flipping through the contracts – unbelievably they were more complicated than the ones the CIA had made her sign when she first became an agent.

“The labs contain some highly classified materials, which you need clearance to see.”

“And to get clearance I need to be an agent.” Moira concluded, scanning the documents before her. At the same time, her mind raced. Did she really want to join S.H.I.E.L.D?

There was a knock at the door and they all fell silent as a tall woman walked in to deliver a message to Phillips.

“We need to get to the next meeting.” He told Agent Fury, standing up. “Carter, would you finish up with MacTaggert?”

“Of course.”

“Ma’am,” Phillips said as he took his leave, Fury barely nodding as he passed her by.

Carter moved into the seat that had been occupied by Mr Stark, so they were opposite from one another.

“Read through the files carefully. I suspect you will be familiar with some of them from your time in the CIA, and I imagine when you joined the Mutants Division you would have signed most of these.”

“I’m not going to have them suing me if I tell you anything about the Division, am I?” Moira grouched as she finished reading the first sheet.

“No, they won’t.”

With a sigh, Moira leant back in her chair. She felt a little more comfortable airing her doubts now there weren’t so many people around. And she had plenty she wanted to discuss before she signed anything. “Did the Mutants Division fall under S.H.I.E.L.D’s remit?”

“No. We had no part in the Mutants Division’s creation or operations. We do have a strong global network however, and, barring the Soviets, most intelligence agencies work in cooperation with us in such circumstances. If they’d followed protocol, this agency should have been made known to us.” Carter studied Moira’s face before giving her a small smile. “You know, when I was first recruited into the intelligence agencies I was very reluctant to join. But I was eventually persuaded that it was the best place for me to be.”

“Why is that?” Moira asked cautiously.

“It was somewhere I could be myself,” Carter replied. “Like me, you possess a specific skill set. However, even having the intelligence, the strength and the determination, it is difficult for us to progress in the world, let alone in organisations like the CIA. The S.S.R was much the same. I was a highly distinguished intelligence operative during the war, only to spend the next few years taking lunch orders for my co-workers. I still fought, and when I got the opportunity to run S.H.I.E.L.D, to reshape the S.S.R. I couldn’t pass it up. I wanted to create an organisation that had no prejudices, that worked to serve the greater good.”

Moira repressed a snort. “Intelligence agencies protect citizens, but I would hardly say they do it for the greater good.”

Carter’s smile widened. “I know. I was very cynical too until I met a man who was so unbelievably idealistic about the world. He was a good man. Someone who would work beside me. I worked to create an organisation he could believe in. And where agents like you could thrive. If you join S.H.I.E.L.D we will work to get your memories back. You can leave afterwards, we wouldn’t stop you. But if you work for it I think you could carve out a real place for yourself here. It won’t be easy, but you’re used to that.” Carter finished, pushing a pen across the desk. “So. Do you just want your past back, or do you want to make yourself a new future?”

Pulling the papers forward, Moira began to reread them again. “And I can leave whenever I want?”

“Yes.”

Moira kept her face impassive as she started to sign the contract. She didn’t trust S.H.I.E.L.D not to lie to her, but then again she didn’t think she was capable of trusting anyone anymore. What she was sure of was that once she had her memories back, they would help her to decide her next move.

Besides, she needed a job.