#i love him sm i love him sm i love him sm
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Emerson said that he met Ayrton when he was 14 years old and took care of him every time Ayrton went to see him after participating in his karting, and that in 1982 he would pick up a super shy Ayrton to take him to all the F1 teams there while introducing him saying that he would be a "future world champion".
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#and the fact that he cries easily in some interviews when talking about ayrton#the “my baby” part in mitski's song was written by him#referring to ayrton#I already know that#I don't need sources#i love them sm#ayrton senna#emerson fittipaldi#formula 1#f1#classic f1#brazil
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already in love w ur page! i would love to see dads bestfriend joel from you!!
hi! thank u sm!! and ofc coming right up on a very hot and steamy platter 😛
Not Your Daddy
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Pairing: Pre-outbreak!Joel Miller x f!reader
Summary: You're back from your first year at college. You've changed and Joel is quick to notice.
Warnings: 18+ SMUT MDNI, age gap (36/19), swearing, p in v, size kink, loss of virginity, unprotected sex, fingering, oral (fem!recieving) no Sarah, alcohol
Celia's note: Heres jus a lil something :) (not proofread sorry) also part 3 of ain't right is coming so so soon I promise!!
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Joel Miller and your father were good friends.
When you and your dad moved in next door a little over three years ago, they hit it off quickly. Their tendency to take on random jobs for cash is what bonded them. Also sports.
You were shy then, never able to hold eye contact and always avoiding him whenever he was around.
But thankfully, you've grown into a woman. Your first year at college changed you.
Now, you were back for the summer, eager to sleep in your own bed and spend time with your home-town friends.
But honestly, you were most excited to see Joel.
You wanted him to see how much you've grown. See how mature you've become, how confident.
You always had a little crush on him—mostly because he was the kindest out of all your dad's friends.
You also wanted him to be the one to pop your cherry.
You were a virgin, and kinda always fantasized about Joel being the one to take it from you.
Sure, you’ve done some stuff with guys, but never gone all the way. You were saving that for him.
You knew it wouldn't take long until he made an appearance.
Your dad had offered to host a small get-together to celebrate you being back. He would barbecue in the backyard and hold bets for the basketball game.
It was really just an excuse for him to break out the grill and gamble, but you didn't care. Only because you knew Joel would be there.
You even put on your shortest white sundress and blew out your hair for the occasion.
Your body was buzzing with the idea of seeing him again.
You wondered if he had changed at all.
Your mind started spiraling at the thought.
What if he had changed? What if he was dating someone now? What if he was engaged?
You glanced in the mirror at your nearly perfect reflection and suddenly felt so silly. What if this was all for nothing?
You didn't have long to ponder that thought because the doorbell rings.
You peak out your window and see Joel's truck in the driveway.
Your dad answers the door downstairs, the faint murmur of voices distracting your ears.
The anticipation was gnawing at you like a hungry dog.
After collecting your nerves, you slowly descend the stairs to meet them in the kitchen.
The loud cussing gave away their location. "You've lost your damn mind if you think there's a chance in hell the Privateers of all fucking teams are gonna beat—oh, hey darlin'," Your dad greets you, clearing his throat like he wasn't just cussing out Joel.
His back is to you, but when he turns around, your heart fucking ignites.
He's just as handsome as the day you left. He looks momentarily stunned by you, his eyes flickering all over your figure. God—how was it possible for someone to change so much? You looked more than amazing.
He immediately feels ashamed for basically checking you out in front of your dad, his eyes snapping back up to your face.
"Christ kid, they feedin' you up there at A&M?" He teases before stepping in for a hug.
He even smells the same as he did all those months ago, pine and smoke. You feel relieved.
It seems like the only thing thats different about him is a few gray hairs.
"Hey Joel," you greet with a giddy smile, hugging him back and relishing in his warmth. "How are you?"
Joel is very surprised. He almost doesn't recognize you. You're so much more...more.
"M'alright, aside from the fact that your dad's gonna give me a fuckin' aneurysm one of these days."
You laugh and shake your head. "Fighting about the game tonight?"
"Yeah, this fuckin' asshat thinks the longhorns might lose tonight—messin' up the whole fuckin' mojo," Your dad rambles, his voice beginning to raise before the doorbell rings again. "I'll get that, need to get away from this traitor." He snorts before heading to the door and leaving you both alone.
Joel rolls his eyes before landing his gaze back onto you and your cute little sundress. He crosses his arms over his chest and turns to face you with his body.
"You behavin' up there at school?" He asks light-heartedly, though you find it excruciatingly hard not to reply in some suggestive way.
"Mhm," You hum unconvincingly with a charmingly guilty smile, holding back a laugh.
Joel cocks a brow, pretending to look at you judgmentally. "Lyin’ is a sin, y’know." He huffs, a smile creeping on his lips.
“I’ve been good, just a lotta temptations s’all..” You murmur softly, your body naturally drifting closer to Joel by swaying on your feet.
The tension in the room is palpable.
“Oh yeah?” He tilts his head the tiniest bit to the side, his voice dropping what seemed like several octaves.
In fear of your voice cracking when giving a verbal response, you opt for a nod of your head, but then shrug just to tease him.
He glares at you but then scoffs, shaking his head.
"When'd you become such a little shit-stirrer, huh?" He chides, reaching over to ruffle the top of your hair.
You laugh before pushing his hand away, your fingers lingering on his wrist for longer than it needed to.
His skin is warm, he's almost hot to the touch. You're having a very hard time tearing your eyes away from his face.
All the sudden, your father calls you into the other room.
"Get in here! Max and Ruby wanna hear about your classes." Max and Ruby being your neighbors who had undoubtedly stopped by for the party.
You peer up at Joel, your eyes almost begging him to ask you to stay. But instead, he gestures with his head for you to listen to your dad.
"Go on now," He husks out, sliding his hands into the pockets of his jeans.
Reluctantly you leave him behind in the kitchen, your body still whirring with the adrenaline high you got from just talking to him.
***
It was nice seeing everyone that stopped by for the party. You hadn't realized how much you missed your people.
But Joel was making it hard to concentrate on conversation when you guys were playing eye-tag the entire night.
He really couldn't help himself. There was just something so magnetic about you now—it was impossible to tear his eyes away.
He watched you talk to some of your high school friends, then get up to fetch something from the kitchen.
He couldn’t stop his gaze from falling to your ass once you turned around, his cock twitching in his pants because of the way your dress taunts him with its length.
He clears his throat.
Fuck was he thinking.
This was you he was ogling for christ sake. His best friends daughter.
These thoughts were not allowed. He needed to shut this down.
But the night goes on anyway, people getting more drunk and rowdy with each passing second.
Especially your father, who was currently in a screaming match with his work buddy about the game. They're all crowded around the small box tv in the kitchen, intently watching the tiny screen.
You're watching them from afar, amused by your father and the absurdity of it all.
"Ah fuck, we're outta ice," your dad groans, lifting up the empty bowl in annoyance. "Alright, one of you sons of bitches needs'ta make an ice run, m'not missing this game."
Joel groans out, dragging his hand down his jaw. "We're obviously gonna win—the team's up 46. Make the damn run yourself." He berates your father, who in turn just shakes his head and waves a dismissive hand at Joel.
"Every time I don't watch the game to completion, we fuckin' lose. M'staying riiiight here."
"Fuckin' superstitious bastard." Joel groans from under his breath, picking up his truck keys from the counter. "You want some more beer while I'm out? Maybe my liver too? God knows you need a new one, goddamn alcoholic."
You're laughing at them in the corner, finding their banter extremely amusing.
Then, you suddenly realize this might be your chance to spend more alone time with Joel.
You lurch forward, quickly blocking his path. "Can I come with?"
He looks down at you, a barely noticeable smile tugging at the corner of his lips. He's just about to reply to you before your drunk father cuts in.
"Ya, go with him, he can't carry the ice by himself or else his back’ll give out."
Joel turns his head to yell at your dad. "Shut your damn mouth," he barks, then turns back around to face you, placing his hand on your lower back. "'Course sweetheart, c'mon."
The drastic change in his voice when he talks to you versus your father makes your heart flutter.
He guides you outside to his truck, only dropping his arm from your back when he opens the passenger door for you.
Hopping inside, you settle yourself into the worn down bench seat. Your eyes follow him as he rounds the front of the vehicle, swinging open the driver side door and cranking the engine.
His old country music starts blaring from the speakers of the car, accompanied by the loud drum of his engine.
He’s quick to whip out of the driveway, steering with one muscular arm on the wheel.
You want to drool at the sight—you know your other lips most certainly are.
"So, you got a boyfriend up there at school?" He asks after clearing his throat.
He wants to subtly test the waters, whether he knows it now or not.
You smile, the thought of dating any guy besides Joel was laughable.
"Nope. They're all kinda gross."
"Gross? Yeah, well, most guys your age are." He mumbles, thinking back to his late teens, early twenties—Yikes.
"What about you? Got a woman yet?" You ask, following his line of questioning.
Joel scoffs, keeping his eyes trained on the road. “Does it look like I got a woman in my life?”
He looks down at himself for a second to get his point across, making you follow his gaze.
His wrinkly navy shirt had paint stains on it, his jeans were so old, they looked one wash away from disintegrating, and his beard needed a trim.
You try to stifle your giggle by turning your head away. “Yeah, guess not.”
Your mind starts wandering off, imagining what being Joel's woman would look like...having dinner together...sharing a bed...showering together...
God you wanted to be his girl so bad.
You hear yourself speaking before you even know what you’re saying. ��Maybe I can help you—y'know, find a woman n’all.”
Joel casts you an assessing glance, cocking his eyebrow.
“Oh yeah? N’how would you do that?”
He doesn’t even mean to sound sexy but the way he talks makes you wanna melt.
“Well, for starters, a haircut might do you some good.” You tease, scooting closer to him on the bench seat to fiddle with the overgrown hair by his neck.
The way your body is turned to face him gives Joel a clear view down the front of your dress, the skin of your breasts making his cock twitch.
“What’re you talkin’ about? My hair looks great.” Joel knows he’s lying, but he just wants to see you laugh.
Which you do. “Yea, maybe to a blind chick.”
“Oh, you got jokes, huh?” Joel chides, using his free hand to come up and playfully tug at your hair.
You erupt in giggles, swatting his hand away while simultaneously trying to tug his hair back.
Eventually, you two stop messing with each other, but you reiterate that you're serious.
"I mean it—it’d be super fun giving you a make-over."
Joel pulls into the gas station and shifts his truck into park.
"You've lost your damn mind if you think I'm gonna let you get anywhere near my head with clippers."
You roll your eyes and giggle, following him out of the vehicle.
"C'monnn, it'll be fun!" You squeal, trailing behind him as he walks into the store, the bell chiming as you both enter.
He pretends to ignore you, walking along the isles to the freezer section.
"I'll be super careful," You muse, snagging a bag of skittles from off one of the shelves before he can notice.
“I promise I won’t fuck up your cut.” You joke, laughing at yourself.
“Hey—watch it.” Joel warns when hearing your profanity, snapping back to look at you, only half-joking.
You roll your eyes—it's ironic coming from him who cusses like a sailor. You brush past him as he opens the freezer, letting your back lean against one of the glass doors, facing him.
"You're not my daddy, y'know. Can't tell me what to do." You purr, a shit-eating grin beginning to form on your perfect face.
Joel feels his blood pressure spike.
You're making this impossible for him and you know it.
His body moves for him before he can stop himself.
After he grabs two ice bags, he closes the freezer and subsequently steps closer to you, popping your personal space bubble.
"You're right. M'not your daddy." He husks, looking down at you and your parted lips. Your chests are centimeters away from each other, and you find yourself holding your breath. “Consider yourself lucky.”
The way he’s looking down at you like prey yet speaking so nonchalantly has your brain spinning. There was definitely an underlying threat in his words.
Before you can respond, he’s turned around and walking up to the register, throwing down a 10 dollar bill and telling the cashier to keep the change.
Science can’t explain the drastic acceleration your heart rate just experienced—but you can.
Joel fucking Miller.
He had to be insinuating something, right?
Your face is hot and so is the rest of your body, stumbling to catch up with him as he walks out the store.
He lugs the ice into his trunk like nothing happened, the tension in his muscles catching your eyes.
Yet, he still comes around to the passenger side, opening the door for you.
Now was your chance to get him back.
You lift yourself up in the truck, purposefully climbing into the bench seat in a way that gave Joel a clear view of your ass—as well as your thong that wasn't really covering much.
His hand clamps down so hard on the car handle that it nearly crumbles under his grip.
You hear him clear his throat before the door slams shut next to you, making you jump a bit.
When he passes in the front windshield, he's shaking his head and dragging a hand down his scruffy jaw. You can't help but giggle at his exasperated expression.
His takes longer to get into the car and start things up this time, trying real hard not to meet your instense gaze.
When he refuses to make eye contact, you huff out a breath and rip open your skittles bag.
This catches Joel's attention.
"You pay for that?"
"...sure." You murmur unconvincingly with a shrug, trying not to smile. "Want some?"
He watches as you pop a few in your mouth, holding out the bag for him.
Begrungingly, he grumbles out a 'yeah' and holds out his palm.
***
The party had fizzled out when you guys returned. There were a few stranglers sitting around and chatting, but for the most part, things seemed to be dying down.
So much for the ice.
Your dad and his friends had migrated to the living room and once Joel put the bags away, he joined them.
He sat on the couch with a grunt, his legs immediately settling into the manspreading position.
You tried not to drool but your mouth was definitely salivating. To avoid moaning just at the sight of him, you head upstairs, the old wood boards creaking beneath your feet.
You don't see it, but Joel's got his eyes on you, following you with his gaze till you're out of sight.
He feels guilty thinking about how much he wants to fuck you when he's literally sitting right next to your father, but he can't help himself.
It's a while before you come back down, when you do, theres a razor in one hand, clippers in the other.
"No." Joel instantly says, shaking his head.
"Yes." You squeal, beaming down at him.
"Awh, go on Joel, you been needin' a clean up." Your dad chimes in, smacking his shoulder. His other buddies encourage it until he has no choice than to give in just so everyone would shut up.
"Fine—fine. Y'all gon' get yours, thats for damn sure." Joel grumbles, stomping up the stairs.
You're laughing all the way up, bubbling with excitement.
"Come down and give us the reveal when you're done!" Your dad screams to which you giggle.
You basically shove Joel into your bathroom, pulling in a stool for him to sit on.
"You better know what yer doin'." He grunts, sitting down on the stool and looking at you with weary eyes.
"Anything I do to you would look better than what you have now."
Joel promptly stands back up when hearing your words, trying to walk away, but you grab onto his arm. "I'm kidding, I’m kidding! I promise I'll do a good job."
You press on his shoulders to sit him down again, your throat running dry when you see the way he’s glaring up at you.
He’s not actually angry—just a bit peeved that he doesn’t have enough self control to stop thinking about fucking you against the bathroom sink.
You start working, none the wiser, bringing the electric razor to his jaw.
Your bodies are close, Joel can smell your delicious perfume and it makes him wanna eat you up.
You start to notice how sometimes his eyes will flicker to your chest, before abrupdtly looking away and clearing his throat.
Your boobs did look great in this dress, maybe you should give him a better view...
The devilish thought pops in your brain and you're acting it out before you know it.
You set the razor down and grab the clippers, stepping around to the front of his body. "May I?" You murmur, not even waiting for his answer before straddling his lap.
You sit on his thighs and Joel feels himself straighten like a board.
“Kid—what do you think yer doin’?” He immediately sputters out, his expression stern.
He’s trying so hard not to look down at where your dress had ridden up from straddling him. He can almost see your cunt, for christ sake.
“Nothin’.” You murmur, bringing your shaking hand up to trim the hair on his jaw. You curse at yourself for not even having the wits to keep calm, you just know your flushed fave is giving you away.
“Nothin’, huh?” Joel reiterates, completely unbelieving as his eyes drag down your body slowly.
Then, everything shifts.
There’s something more assertive in Joel’s demeanor that you can’t quite put your finger on, but you know it’s there.
You feel his calloused hand on your thigh, your body erupting in goosebumps when he travels it up dangerously high. Using his other hand, he grips your wrist, pulling it down and away from his face.
“Doesn’t look like nothin’ to me.” His voice is a low murmur.
You’re both locked in eye contact now, hearts beating in sync.
He hears your breath hitch and sees how your eyes are flashing between his gaze and lips. He knows what you’re after—he’s just not sure if he wants to give in yet.
You, on the other hand, are dying of anticipation. He’s not budging, so you’re left to drag your hips up his lap and press down on the bulge in his pants.
"Girl—" He growls out before his hands come up to stop your waist from moving any further. "You don't know what your doin'."
"Do I have to fucking spell it out for you, Joel?" You rush out, dropping the scissors and latching onto his shoulders. You're panting and your face is pink, a needy/irritated expression woven into your features.
He feels your nails digging into his shoulder blades and sees that desperate look in your eyes—he's done for.
"No, I won't make ya do that f'me, sweet heart." He murmurs before abruptly picking you up from under your thighs.
A squeak of surprise leaves your lips at his effortless display of strength. You swallow your nerves after he sets you down on the counter, lodging himself between your legs.
"But I am gon make you say it."
Is he teasing you?
No, his face looks too serious for him to be teasing.
Oh, maybe he just wants clear clarification.
Your heart swells at his consideration.
Sucking in a deep breath, "I want your dick in my vagina." You giggle out, knowing he was probably expecting sexier wording. Joel smirks, crashing his forehead against yours.
"Yeah? S'that what you want?"
You're nodding against him, smiling wide because you just admitted something that you never thought you would.
"N'have you done that before? Y'know, dick in vagina." He copies your candance, but you stop smiling.
Out of all the fucking questions, that was the one that you didn't want to be asked the most.
You had hoped if you came on strong and flirted like you had done it a million times, he would've just assumed you weren't a virgin.
But the bastard always had to be so careful.
You didn't want him to know because you figured it would turn him off—then all you'd become is his best friend’s daughter all over again.
You knew if you lied he would just sniff it out anyway, but you tried nonetheless.
"...Yea. Couple times."
You watch as Joel's face forms into a 'yea right' kind of expression before he sighs out.
"Why'a lyin' to me, kid?"
You groan, throwing your head back and hitting the mirror with the back of your skull.
"Thats why—I don't want you thinking I'm a kid anymore. M'not. I'm grown. I'm grown and I want..your dick in my vagina."
He scoffs, dragging a hand down in jaw in disbelief. "Lyin' ain’t a good way to show me your grown."
He was right. You hated that he was right.
Your face crumbles because you think you just ruined this whole thing. Yet, Joel's hands come up to cup your face, holding them there a moment before they drift down to rest on your neck.
"S'alright, you're alright. M'not mad at'cha." He reassures, making sure you're looking in his eyes before he continues. "M'flattered sweetheart, I really am but-"
"Please don't say some bullshit like you don't think you're the man for this job because trust me when I say this Joel, you're the only guy I've ever wanted to be with."
You gush out, your mouth a leaky faucet. But Joel still looks conflicted.
You figured now would be a good time to bring out the big guns.
"If you won't do it cus I'm a virgin, I'll just have sex with the first guy I see, how about that?"
Joel's eyes darken and his jaw clenches. Now you've just pissed him off. "Don't manipulate me like that." He says sternly, to which you immediately falter in your confidence.
"I'm sorry, I don't know why I said that. I didn't mean it." You shake your head at yourself, biting down on your bottom lip. Joel sighs, leaning back but still keeping himself between your legs.
"Look," you start up again, bringing your hand down to hold his muscular bicep. "I've wanted to do this with you for so long. I really want it to be with you. Even if it's just one time, that's okay. Just need you in some way—Joel."
Your voice tapers off into a whisper because his stare intimidates you.
He exhales through his nose before running a hand through his hair and fixing his back to stand up straighter.
"Alright." He huffs, his face looking like he just surrendered in war.
"Alright?" You repeat, hopes high.
"I'll do it," He removes himself from between your legs and slides his grip down to your thighs. "But not right now."
Your heart drops.
"Why not?" You whine like a kicked puppy.
He brings one hand up to pinch your cheek. "Cus your daddy's down stairs, m'not a fuckin' monster." He grumbles before letting go and starting to walk out, but you grab him.
"Fine, but can we at least.." You hop down off the counter and pull him back, kissing him abruptly.
It starts slowly at first, you're both scoping out the scene, but then you get eager.
A tongue slips into his mouth and he returns the favor, his hands finding themselfs back on your hips.
In no time, he has your back up against the wall while he devours your mouth like a man starved. And just as his hand starts sliding up your dress and he's about to go back on his word, a voice comes from downstairs.
"C'mon down Joel, we wanna see the new cut!"
You groan as Joel slips from you, walking back downstairs while wiping his jaw and adjusting the boner in his pants. *** Now it was a waiting game.
Everyone but your dad's friends had left the party; they were just sitting around, watching TV and drinking beers.
You and Joel can't stop making eye contact from the opposite ends of the room. It was like torture not being able to fuck him immediately.
You're quick to conjure up a plan, though.
"Hey dad," you start, twirling a loose thread from your dress around your finger.
"Ya?"
"Didn't they reopen Chambers, like, two weeks ago?" You ask, trying to keep your voice as inconspicuous as possible.
Chambers was the local bar that your dad and his buddies loved to go to. You were just trying to plant a seed.
"Mm, yea, I reckon they did." He sighs out, eyes glued to the TV.
"S'been awhile since we've been there." One of his friends chime in.
"We should go grab a few drinks—I've missed picking up broads from there.." Another friend says, to which your dad promptly hits his arm because he doesn't like that kind of talk when you're present.
Nevertheless, he casts you a questioning glance. "You gon' be alright if we go?"
You try so hard to mask your instant glee. "Oh yeah, I'll be fine! Y'all go n' have fun."
"Alright punkin," They all stand, gathering up their wallets and keys—everyone except Joel. "You comin'?" Your dad asks him.
You glare at him to make sure he understands what you're trying to do.
Joel inhales through his nose before sighing out with a smile. "M'gonna call it a night, boys."
Thank god.
They all grunt and groan in protest, but eventually everyone filters out of the house.
You stand in the door jam and watch as your dad and his buddies file into the car, Joel standing on the porch to wave them off. Words are exchanged between everyone, mostly cussing, as they make their depature.
You both watch as they leave the culdesac, even waiting until you couldn't hear the car engine in the distance before looking at Joel.
Your breath catches in your throat when he turns around to look at you, folding his arms over his chest.
"Sly work." He murmurs, walking forward and forcing you to walk back into the house.
You're not sure why you're so nervous all the sudden.
Because you were pretending to be bold and experienced before, you had no choice but to mask your nerves. Now, that Joel knows the truth, you feel...vulnerable. But in the best way possible.
He backs you into the house before closing the door behind him, his head hanging to look at the ground.
"I had to get you alone somehow." You murmur with a shrug of your shoulders.
It was the truth.
You hear Joel chuckle and watch as he brings his head up to look at you. He's assessing you.
A beat of silence washes over you both.
"You said you would, Joel." You try to say sternly, although your voice wavers because you're scared he might've changed his mind.
"I know what I said." He steps closer, your torso's centimeters apart.
The eye contact is heavy—it feels like an avail against you. But you love it—love him. You're holding back from jumping his bones right by the front door.
"Good." You practically whisper, slowly taking his large hand in yours. You wait until he interwines your fingers before turning around and guiding him up the stairs.
Every creak under his and your feet sounds deafening in the silence between you both.
His hand is sweating, but so is yours.
When you make it to your bedroom, you walk inside and sit on the edge of your bed, gazing up at him.
"How many women have you slept with?" You hear yourself blurt before you can stop yourself.
His lips tighten into a line before he sits down next to you. Your sides are touching, his hands are resting on his knees.
"A few." He grunts, turning to face you. "Lot of 'em forgettable. But this," he gestures between the two of you. "ain't no comin' back from this, you hear me?"
You nod, your hand slipping over his knee. You're trying to trail it higher up his thigh, but he stops you with his hand.
"Need to make sure you know that before we do this. Don't want you regrettin' it later-"
"I won't." You say curtly, only because you know with complete certaintly that there was no way you'd ever regret this.
Everything is still for a moment, the only sound in the room is the both of your breathing. He's staring at you so hard, just waiting for even a hint of hesitation.
But it never comes.
In one swift movement, Joel's lips are on yours, pushing you back into the mattress and settling on top of you.
It makes you dizzy how effortlessly he's making out with you now.
He slots himself between your thighs and you moan at the feeling.
It's embarrassing how little he had to do in order to get you off.
But it's Joel, for christsake—he could just stand there and you'd probably find a way to orgasm at least twice.
It feels like he's engulfing you entirely; his musuclar arms wrapped around you, tongue down your throat, chests pressed together—pure bliss.
Suddenly and devastatingly, he breaks away for just a moment. "Sit up." He husks, to which you immediately oblige.
He lifts your dress up and off, momentairly stunned by the sight of your bare breasts.
"Christ, you're unreal." He groans before latching his mouth onto one of your nipples, using his hand to grope the other one.
You're a mess of moans, but you manage to speak in between. "Take your clothes off too," you whine, pawing at his shirt.
Joel grumbles, taking his time. He strips his shirt off and your hands are quick to latch onto his belt, fumbling with the leather strap but eventually yanking it out of the loops.
His hands come out to steady yours. "Slow down, no rush." He purrs in his texan drawl, making you shiver.
You groan out in frustration, letting your back fall down against the bed again. "You gonna make me wait all summer?"
"If you keep bein' a brat, then maybe." Joel huffs, yanking you back by the legs so he can pull your thong off. He dangles the stringy piece of fabric by his finger, looking at it assessingly.
"Joel!" You squeal, embarrassed. He effortessly holds you down with one hand against your stomach, not letting you swat it away from him.
"This what you go 'round wearin'?" He teases, grinning sharply.
You shrug, all squrimy, prodding him with your legs. "Would it turn you on if I said I wore them for you?"
You almost don't notice when Joel stuffs your underwear into his back pocket because of how drawn you are to his eyes. He's looking at you like a man starved—you love it.
"You been plottin' on me, is that it?" His voice makes your wet hole clench around nothing. He's teasing, but you also feel like you've just been caught.
You definitely weren't as suave as you thought you were.
"Stop makin' fun of me. " You huff with a flustered face, narrowing your eyes at him.
Joel smirks, finally prying apart your legs and taking a good, long look at your dripping cunt. "Christ almightly..." He groans at the sight of you, his cock straining hard against his jeans. "Pretty lil thing."
Your back arches off the bed when you feel Joel's thumb brush against your folds, tantilizingly slow. "Nice n' wet, atta girl." He muses, spreading your lips apart with his fingers.
You wanted to make a joke about him inspecting you like some doctor, but the words died quickly on your tongue when you felt him stroke your clit.
"Joel," You moan, hips squirming impatiently. "Fuck, I need you,"
"You got me, babygirl," Joel murmurs before lowering his head and devouring your cunt completely.
His tongue laps at you with fever, primarily focusing on your aching clit. The sensation nearly makes you pass out, especially when he pushes a finger inside of your hole.
"Ohmygodohmygodohmygod," You whine, fisting the sheets so hard that your knuckles turn white.
Having someone eat you out and it being actually enjoyable is one thing, but having Joel Miller eat you out and it being amazing, was blowing your mind.
He didn't even take breathers.
Joel was consuming you like he didn't need air. Soon, you feel another finger stretch you open, then another, until Joel has three fingers smoothly pumping in and out of you.
It quickly becomes all too much for your little brain. "Hmph..fuck Joel m'gonna come," You whine, your hips staggering against his mouth.
He doesn't answer you, in fact, Joel just wraps his musclar arms tightly under your thighs, securing you in place. In this position, you were rendered completely immoveable.
He kept you right where he wanted you.
"Waitwait, shit, Joel," His tongue is relentless, drinking you up like he was dying of thirst in the desert. Tears are forming in the lining of your eyes, the stimulation overloading you.
"Fuck!" You cry, coming completely undone beneath him. Your entire body shakes with pleasure as you finish, thighs squeezing the sides of his head.
Joel laps you all the way through it, humming contentedly against your soaked cunt.
When your body goes limp against the bed, thats finally when Joel lifts his lips off you. His entire face down past his nose is drenched in your juices; the sight makes your stomach flutter.
"Holy fucking shit Joel," You whimper, out of breath, chest heaving up and down. "That was amazing."
Joel lands a couple soft warning pats against your cunt, making you flinch and squirm from overstimulation.
"You cuss like a sailor, y'know that?"
"S'hard not to when you're makin' me feel so good." You're mumbling, wiping at the tear streaks on your face with the back of your hand.
"Mm, I know," He hums in that caring tone, crawling on top of you and placing a few chaste kisses on your lips.
It doesn't take long for your libido to rise again, wrapping your arms around his shoulders and eagerly kissing him back.
You bring a hand down to palm at his boner, giggling into the kiss. He groans at the feeling, rutting his hips into your hand. "Fuck me now please," You say breathlessly into his ear, nipping and licking at his neck.
He scoffs at your enthusiasm.
Finally, Joel pulls his pants off, letting his cock spring free and slap against his stomach.
You're enamoured by the sight of it. Long in length, even bigger in girth. You practically start drooling.
"You got a starin' problem too." Joel grumbles, grabbing you by the jaw and tilting your head up so he can kiss you again.
You chuckle into his lips, breaking away for a moment to speak. "I can't help it. It's handsome..you're handsome." You muse, getting a fist around his cock, managing to stroke it a few times before Joel stops you.
You don't have time to think or argue before he turns you over onto your side, situating himself behind you.
He's spooning you, except his left arm is hooked around your chest and his right has your leg lifted up, allowing his cock to slip between your folds.
Once again, he's got you right where he wants you.
"Joel," You bring your hands up to hold onto his forearm, pushing your ass back into him. "Put it in." You all but demand, trying to desperately grind your cunt on him.
He tightens his grasp on your collarbone, pulling you tighter against his chest. "Keep your leg up baby," Joel mutters lowly in your ear, letting go of your leg to guide his cock to your entrance.
His fat tip prods against your willing hole, making you dizzy with need. He runs his fingers along your folds one last time, gathering up your slick and using it to lubricate his cock.
Your heart is beating a million miles per hour. The moment you had been dreaming of for so long was finally here.
Joel, taking your virginity—your prayers were answered.
Slowly, Joel starts inching his way inside, the stretch making you gasp.
It feels fine at first, just a dull ache, but then it hurts—bad.
You squeeze your eyes shut and grit your teeth, trying to push through the pain. However, your body clenches down on the intrusive appendage, causing Joel to groan out.
It feels good for him, but he's been around the block a few times to know what's happening.
"You okay? I need'a stop?" He asks in that raspy voice of his, to which you immediately shake your head.
"Nonono, god no, don't stop. Just—just ram it in." You say foolishly, making Joel scoff.
"No, sweetheart, as much as I want to—bad idea." He brings his hand back down between your legs, rubbing a few slow circles into your clit. "Just relax and open up for me, thaaaats it," He encourages in that tone that lights fires in your core.
The perfect stimulation on the bundle of nerves made you forget all about the pain, letting your hole ease up a bit.
He takes the oppurtunity to keep breaching you deeper, peppering kisses to your neck and back in the process. His fingers stay glued to your clit, and before you know it, he's half way inside.
Your holding onto him so hard that your nails are leaving imprints on his forearm.
But you're so full of him and it's perfect. You can feel every twitch, every notch, every vein; or maybe you're just convincing yourself you can. Either way, mewls and moans are slipping from your lips and feeding Joel's growing ego.
"You feelin' good sweetheart?" He rasps in your ear, thrusting back and forth till he reaches that half way mark. You nod frantically, craning your neck to face him, desperate for a kiss.
He satisfies your wishes, kissing you slowly and passionately, like everything you've ever wanted.
His dick in you, his tongue down your throat, his arms pinning you to him. Fuck.
But you still want more.
In a shocking move, you slam your hips back against him, burying him all the way inside.
Moans fill your little bedroom, both his and yours, and for a moment, a flash of regret hits you like a truck.
He's big, and it fucking hurts.
But once the initial pain subsides, it’s like ecstasy.
"Fuck—girl, what'd ya do that for?" Joel hisses, tensing up because he's trying not to come fast.
"Couldn't wait," you pant, tears spilling out the corners of your eyes. "Please move." You're pleading because being stationary is somehow even more painful. You squirm in Joel's strong grasp, trying to stop the ache between your legs.
He's no match for you.
In a gentle but swift motion, Joel situates himself on top of you, closing your thighs together and putting them on one side of his body—all while still inside of you.
He cages you in with his big strong arms, looking down at your needy expression as he gradually starts rocking his hips into you. You're twisting your torso to remain looking at him, clawing at his biceps with your nails.
"This how you like it?" He huffs out, the sweat evident on his brow. "Deep n' slow?"
You want to respond to him, but it's hard to because every other sound you make is a moan.
He's so deep and never fails to hit the one spot that just makes you melt.
Opting for a non-verbal response, you nod with fever, gyrating your hips to meet his thrusts.
He chuckles, the sound alone makes you wanna come.
His name slips from your lips like a prayer—Joel finds it so cute because when he hits deep, your voice raises in pitch.
But he's no better, he'd been groaning in your ear since the start of it. He really cant help it, your cunt is like a silky, wet vice molded perfectly for his cock.
Joel lifts one of your legs up to his chest, securing his muscular arm around your thigh to keep it there. He continues he's deep thrusts, only this time picking up rhythm. He also brings his other hand down to lazily rub circles in your clit.
Christ.
Your head lolls back and your eyes roll into the back of your head. The stimulation was insanely perfect and all too much at the same time.
Your body wracks with jolts and spasms—your body trying to cope with everything it's feeling. Joel takes notice, a proud and lopsided smile spreading across his face.
"M'gonna cum," You whine, your body writhing against him with each thrust.
Your pussy is clenching down on him with each piston of his hips, Joel is not far behind you.
He rubs your clit in a way that makes you come undone, your back arching up off the bed and your toes curling from pleasure.
At the same time, Joel picks up his pace, only to pull his cock from inside you and pump it a few times before unloading his seed onto your naked torso.
For a moment, the only sound in the room is the heavy breathing coming from the both of you. Joel's staring down at your pussy, entraced with the way your hole is constricting around nothing.
Then, he looks at your face. Your eyes are closed, your lips are parted, your chest is heaving up and down. He's admiring you and all your fucked-out glory.
He brings a hand up to your face, wiping off the tear stains with his thumb. "You alright?" He husks out, looking down at you assessingly.
"M'perfect." You coo, slowly opening your eyes and leaning up to kiss him. Joel returns it, loving the way your mouth opens so readily for him.
He'd have to try it out with his dick next time.
"Can we go again?" You murmur into his mouth, your arms wrapping around his shoulders.
Joel scoffs because he thinks you're kidding. You're not. When he realizes this, he shakes his head in disbelief, pushing you down onto the bed by your shoulders.
"Don't worry, we got all summer."
#anon ask#first request yay#dbf!joel#joel miller x reader#joel miller smut#tlou fanfiction#the last of us hbo#joel tlou#joel the last of us#joel miller#tlou fic#one shot#drabble
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Rub it in their face, put a rock on her hand!
pairings: husband!zayne x wife!reader
cw: making out, jealousy, slight possessive!reader, fluff, zayne loves you sm,
You know what Zayne finds hot about you? Is when you're proud to show off that he's married to you. You're not married to him, he's the ONE married to you.
He adores how proudly you show off the wedding ring he gave you-- how the big rock shines so brightly like you did in your wedding day.
He's one lucky man-- loud and proud to show off that you got him wrapped around your little finger. And one thing he likes about when you show off the ring to others is when you're jealous.
Already sensing something bad from the newcomer nurse that was assigned to the cardiac department-- how she always been pestering your husband whenever he goes. And of course her attempts at flirting and asking out Zayne for a date are always dismissed.
Not that he wants to remain professional, it's just that he'd rather die than spend his time with anyone besides his wife.
You can't help but bat an eye on the nurse and of course as cocky as she is-- she gives back the same energy, raising her brow at you with a judging look on her face as if you're nothing to her. And that hit your last nerve.
Zayne instructed her to drop off some files to Yvonne and get the new files back to his office-- and of course she followed his orders like a puppy. Smiling happily as she takes the files from your husband's desk, making you roll your eyes as you crossed your arms and lean against the couch. As the nurse takes her leave Zayne approached you as he noticed your grumpy look.
"Hm, my wife is feeling grumpy again?" He teased-- sitting beside you as he smiled, putting a hand over your thigh making you pout at him when he poked your cheek.
Before words can come out of your husband's mouth your hand quickly reaches to his tie as you pull it towards you-- making Zayne's eyes widen as both of your lips come in contact. His eyes softened, melting to the warmth of your soft lips against his as he closed his eyes.
Your left hand travels to his nape as your fingers soothe his black locks. The ring wrapped around your ring finger shining brightly when it got hit by the light on top.
You hear the door of Zayne's office open and the nurse comes in-- she froze at her spot as she witnesses the scene in front.
You opened your eyes-- having an eye contact with the nurse who's looking at you in disbelief. Enjoying the savor of your husband's lips against your soft ones, as your fingers soothe the back of his hair-- the ring wrapped around shining brightly as you show it off while you look at her filled with pride.
You watched her quickly get out of the office as she closes the door-- you pull out from the kiss as a string of saliva connects to both of your lips. Zayne looks at you as he gives you one peck on your lips as you giggle. He smiles as he caresses your cheek with his left hand the coldness of the ring touching your skin.
"Did someone came in, honey?" He asked you, as you shook your head and smiled while giving a kiss on his palm.
"hmm, I don't think so"
He's your wife:((
#love and deepspace#lads#love and deepspace x reader#love and deepspace zayne#zayne love and deepspace#zayne x mc#zayne x reader#lads zayne#lnds zayne#l&ds zayne#zayne#love and deepspace x you
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moonstone eyes. 🔷
---
I was going feral over the moonstone eyes thing. That's it, that's the post.
Another drawing was taking... well, WAY too long, so I sat myself down and made myself stop hyperfixating on every minute detail 😭. So, it's not perfect (someone please tell me how to draw backgrounds), but sometimes done is better than perfect. Either way, IT'S THE BOY!!
#this still took me. a good while. but we'll get there!!#i love him sm#cb isn't as much an obsession as a lifestyle now#cinderella boy#cinderella boy punko#cinderella boy webtoon#buddy cinderella boy#nox cinderella boy#webtoon#artists on tumblr#digital art#my art#my stuff
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thinking about Zayne……
… thinking about being held by the waist by Zayne while cooking and swaying to music.
… thinking about Zayne glancing at your lips while your talking about how your day went.
… thinking about how Zayne would run his fingers down your spine while you two lay together in peace.
… thinking about feeling Zayne’s smile when you two kiss.
yeah… i’m just thinking about Zayne.
(this is me rn btw)
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/57128b95f53fb396514f0c8a8654779f/520a2b19b9b6da36-a4/s540x810/9b3e3c3923f84f584294ba1fe542909ded4b31c8.jpg)
#ria rambles#I LOVE HIM SM :’)#l&ds zayne#lads zayne#zayne love and deepspace#zayne smut#zayne x reader#love and deepspace#lads#l&ds
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I just finished listening to The Suckening ☹️ like this very minute. I don't know what to do anymore. I need them back eufgggh urggh i love them so muchhh,,,
#Crying#Spoilers ahead in the tags im gonna rant#The whole sequence with Theo and Emizel against Edward was TERRIFYING dude#I was drawing at the time and i think half of those 2 pages are filled with “NOOO NO THEO NO”#SCARY‼️‼️‼️#And dude everything about shilo in part 2 of the finale urghgghg#HEARTBREAKING#Godddddd.#I love him sm.#GHRRRRR hes such a main character it's#Arthur losing grip on humanity is pretty iconic too but ya#I loved when the twins got to hug. That was awesome. I love those guys so much urghh#I love them they are the brothers ever#URGGHHHGRRRR#PAIN PAIN PAIN#I cant believe im feeling so much misery ab the dnd campain with the main villain “Edward Twilight” but i am#Anyway#My favorite is still Emizel#No one could ever compare tbh#I dont even think albatrio get close theres just something about Emizel#How am i gonna just move on from this#Apothiosis is next on my list but god. Idk if i can handle peter sqloint after this#The Suckening absolutly the best campain im so serious. Like riptide is the best too but come ON#Anyway yeah thats just me. What the fuck dude#I hope Theo is ok ☹️😔#Jrwi#jrwi the suckening#the suckening#Emizel tucker#Jrwi fanart
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I love him sm
when ur just a funky little skater punk hedgehog
(idk if u can tell but only his bangs are straightened, he has braids)
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Heisuke & Piisuke
#my boy !!!#no one cares but heisuke's my second fav sakadays character i just love him sm#he's so precious and deserves all the happiness in the world#every time he's involved in an arc i'm just so happy#like. his energy his skills and personality is just so cool he's so cool#sakamoto days#heisuke mashimo#mashimo heisuke#piisuke#hehe piisuke gets a tag too#sakamotodaysedit#anisource#fyanimegifs#animangaboys#bluee
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i love it sm when phil makes this noise. catboy behavior. why are you as a grown man chirping like a little kitty :3 i love him
(+bonus dan cordless hammer drill impression)
clips from poppy playtime 3
#it tickles my brain lol#i tried to make this noise but i just ended up making a dutch g sound idk how he does it#phan#dan and phil
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Can I request Felix who is usually a sub leaning/vanilla and wants to dom reader for the first time, and Bangchan is there to help teach him what to do.
Idk if it makes sense but I love your work sm💕
-👩💻
[Drabble] Just A Little Help | Felix x Reader [+ Chan]
Felix loves when you take control, don't get him wrong. He likes the feeling of you being on top - hovering over him, sitting in his lap, riding him until his thighs push together and his knees knock against one another, shaking as you milk him dry. Those times are the best for him because it lets him relax, lets someone else take control so he doesn't have to worry about how he's doing, if he's doing it right, if he should do something different;
But he wants to try something new. He wants to try being dominant with you, but he isn't really.. sure where to start. It isn't the same as you being dominant so he can't really just think back and retrace your steps before following them himself, so he tries to do some research. But even then, he's a little nervous! Videos only show so much and so many of them are staged, even some of the amateur stuff (which is also filmed at shitty angles.)
Videos didn't help, articles didn't help - and his confidence is beginning to dwindle so much that he's debating just giving up and letting you dominate him like usual tonight. But then Chris sends him something - it's a meme, though it's sexual in nature, a clear innuendo that Chris is laughing at over text.
And so Felix decides to ask his Hyung for help.
It's a little embarrassing at first, but Chris seems to take it seriously. He understands why Felix is asking and offers up front to help the younger Aussie with his wants. He comes to the house in the evening and greets you with a polite smile.
When the time comes, you expect Chris to take his leave and head home. Only, Felix informs you that he wants Chris to stay, asking for your permission to keep him in the room. You're surprised, but if it's something they both want then you suppose it's alright - And you're only further surprised by the way your boyfriend initiates everything first. He's the one to kiss you, to gently guide you to the bed, to grind down against you and have you squirming beneath him in need. You're confused, but wildly aroused, and peek over at Chris only to see him gently nodding at Felix who was also glancing over.
Chris is there to guide him.
You've caught on, but stay quiet. Bringing it to their attention might only embarrass Felix and he seems to be in the groove right now, so you simply hum and moan and nod along as Chris comes closer to the bed to tell Felix what to do verbally. No more hints - simple, crisp, clear instructions. When to take off your jeans, how to pull down your panties with his teeth. Felix's tongue meets your clit and you gasp out, use to sitting on his face and having it all at once; But the gentle teasing he ensues when he's in control is enough to drive you mad - No tongue burying in your pussy, no suffocation of your poor sweet boyfriend beneath you. Instead it's little kisses peppered inside your thighs, the tip of his tongue flicking over the bundle of nerves he seemed to locate so expertly.
Chris watches the way your body shifts and uses your body language to decipher whether or not Felix needed to do more. He stays quiet until Felix comes up, hastily pushing his boxers down his thighs and crawling onto the bed between your legs. He doesn't need help with this part, sinking into your walls and whimpering at the way you seem to swallow him whole. Felix had to admit, the moment he started moving he almost regretted being on top - because he knew as soon as your thighs locked around his waist that he was going to become addicted to the feeling.
He's fucking into you just fine, and you seem to be pretty content with it - moaning, whining into the space between you - but Chris suggests Felix could take it a little further. Chris hums out that Felix could choke you, but the younger of the two quickly shakes his head. He isn't sure about it, is a little too shy to do such a thing just yet, and instead opts to lean down over you and cage you in with his elbows pressing just above your shoulders. It allows him to kiss you but still gives you the feeling of being held down, trapped beneath him.
Felix is exhausted by the time it's over. He isn't use to doing more of the work so he just lays atop you and lets you card your fingers through his hair while Chris sits aside quietly, waiting until someone got up to take his leave. He shifts when you get up first, rolling so Felix laid on the bed and you could get up and off of him.
Chris gives you time to get dressed, meeting you in the kitchen shortly after. He asks how it felt, if it was okay with him there - and when he hears that you actually liked having someone else in the room, Chris asks if he could potentially come back another time. Maybe be involved more.
Though, he has to warn you; He isn't as gentle as Felix is.
#skz imagine#skz x reader#stray kids x reader#skz smut#stray kids smut#bangchan x reader#felix x reader
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Vincent Price and Barbara Steele -
The Pit And The Pendulum (1961)
#vincent price#the pit and the pendulum#barbara steele#king and queen of horror#classic horror#edgar allan poe#horror movies#gothic#gothic horror#goth aesthetic#i love this movie sm#and hes so hot#the kiss at the end 🥵#im so normal about him#emmerich volkarin#horror#old horror movies#vintage#movie#bicon#actor#handsome#gif#gifs made by me#my gifs
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A Jar Full of Us | one-shot (TEASER)
Pairing: Jungkook x (f.) Reader
Releasing on: February 14th, 2025 (Valentine's Day Special)
Genre/Tags: best friend! jungkook, best friend! reader, college! au, idiots to lovers, best friends to lovers, angst, fluff, arguments, misunderstandings, potential smut
Summary: You never meant for him to find them. Hundred little confessions, folded away, never meant to be read. But now, they’re in his hands. And Jungkook—your best friend—knows everything. But he doesn’t say a word. He just watches you, with that same unreadable expression, like he’s waiting for something. And this Valentine’s Day, you might just have to find out what.
Inspired by: To All the Boys I've Loved Before
Word count: tbd (currently at 4k)
Teaser word count: 204
Warnings: none.
A/N: I love this trope sm and I wanted to write something for Valentine's Day. This fic is my baby and it will be out on Feb 14th! there will be a taglist for this fic. if ur interested to be a part of it then drop a message below this post or send me an ask!
Your stomach sank.
Maybe his roommate took it upstairs? Yeah. That had to be it. Maybe it was sitting untouched on the kitchen counter, still wrapped, still safe, still unseen.
You latched onto that sliver of hope as you rushed up the stairs two at a time, unwilling to wait for the elevator. By the time you reached his floor, your hands were shaking. You raised a fist and knocked on the door, urgency making your knuckles sting.
No response.
You knocked again, harder this time.
Then—finally—you heard shuffling from inside. A few footsteps. The creak of the floorboards. A pause.
The door swung open.
And there he was.
Jungkook.
Standing right in front of you, framed in the dim light of his apartment, wearing an oversized grey hoodie that draped over his frame in a way that shouldn't have been so unfairly attractive. His dark hair was slightly damp, messy from a shower, strands falling into his eyes. His lips were parted in surprise, his brows slightly furrowed, and the expression on his face—confused yet soft, dangerously soft—made your already erratic heartbeat lurch violently.
But then, your gaze dropped to his hands.
And the world stopped.
The box.
The open box.
Your box.
There will be a taglist for this fic and if you are interested to be a part of it please drop me a message below this post or send me an ask!
#jungkook smut#jungkook x reader#jungkook angst#jungkook imagine#jungkook#jeon jungkook#jungkook jeon#bts smut#bts army#bts ff#bts#bts imagine#bts imagines#bts incorrect quotes#bts jungkook#fan fiction#jungkook fanfic#bts ffs#bts ff recs#jungkook ff#valentines day#jungkook fluff#to all the boys i've loved before#tatbilb#idiots to lovers#best frinends to lovers
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Jesper, who could've easily be written off as a typical side character comedic relief, was in fact given proper depth, character arc, background, and emotional growth as a character means so much to me. Jesper who could've been just "Kaz's right handed man" was instead writen as a poc queer ADHD teenager, who has a father who isn't really sure what to do with him but loves him despite. Jesper, who could've easily been paved away for Inej to enter as Kaz's love interest (or could've easily turned into a love triangle) gets to be happy with his own love of his life, who has may things to care for other than his social circle and in the end tries to fix every wrong he had ever done. I love jesper sm i love his character i love the way he was written and i will not stand any jesper slander.
#soc#soc ck#soc fandom#kaz brekker headcanons#inej ghafa hc#kanej#the wraith#six of crows#the six of crows#six of crows duology#crooked kingdom#kaz brekker#kazzle dazzle#inej ghafa#jesper fahey#wylan van eck#wylan van sunshine#wylan hendriks#nina zenik#the corspe witch#matthias helvar#the grishaverse#grishaverse#soc duology#the crows#wesper#helnik#jesper llewellyn fahey
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ONE OF THE BIGGEST NAMES IN T-BOY PORN
I love him sm already
Homeboy went for the jugular AND is super hot and famous!
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📖 ─── a cluttered scrapbook: send in any thoughts on any of the characters below for a blurb .ᐟ
omg hello congratulations??? literally love your blog sm. you’re writing is peak and so perf. i was thinking, we all know rafe is a “proactive” type of person (or so he says). so how would he react to reader giving him the silent treatment after she found out something? (maybe he was doing cocaine again after she explicitly asked him not to anymore???) and what antics would he use to get reader talking to him??
once again, congratulations to you. you deserve so much!!! so proud of you <3333
thank you so much !! i'm so sorry it took so long to get to this </3
cw: dark rafe, manipulation, controlling behavior, threats of self harm
Rafe hates the silent treatment. It feels like a slap in the face. After everything he's done for you, you can't even give him the basic respect of talking things out?
He had done a great job of hiding his ongoing cocaine addiction after you'd threatened to break up with him if he didn't stop. He absolutely couldn't stand ultimatums, being backed into a corner, but he also couldn't lose you, so he promised he would quit and get clean, even pretending to go off to a rehab facility for a month—during which he was actually going on a month-long bender in a fancy hotel up in California.
And his lies had worked. For months, he hid his addiction, leading you to believe that he was finally clean and that he had done it for you.
But then, you dropped your phone one night at his house, and it had found its way under his bed. Leaning down to retrieve it, you pushed up the bottom of his comforter and found yourself greeted by the sight of a wooden box you'd seen before—the very one you had watched Rafe throw away before he went off to "rehab".
With shaky hands, you opened the box and found yourself staring at a baggie of white powder, a substance you knew all too well.
"What are you doing?" Rafe's voice came from the doorway, sharp and defensive. He knew he had been caught, but his mind was already swirling with blame for you rather than accepting the consequences of his own actions. Why were you snooping around his room? Did you not trust him?
You looked up at him, your mind running a million miles a minute as a plethora of emotions overwhelmed you at once. You didn't want to talk to him. You could barely even stomach looking at him right now, so without a word, you grabbed your phone from where it had fallen and stood up abruptly.
He caught your arm as you tried to leave. "Oh, we're doing this now? Real mature," he scoffed at your behavior. You were being dramatic, childish even, by subjecting him to the silent treatment instead of trying to talk this out like adults.
You simply pulled your arm back from him roughly, not meeting his gaze as you pushed past him and hurried down the stairs. He should've followed you, but his pride and ego stopped him. You would come crawling back, apologizing for how you acted. He was sure of it.
But, you didn't. Days went by without a word, and he started to get antsy, started to spiral as paranoia overtook him. You were his. How dare you ignore him? Were you off with another guy? Were you with your awful Pogue friends? He couldn't stand not knowing where you were and having you with him every minute.
At first, he tried to manipulate his way out of it by feigning an apology and ending it with a guilt trip, texting you things like "Okay, I messed up, but you just shutting me out? That's fucked up. Just talk to me, baby," and "It's not like I was doing it all the time. I mean, cmon, are you really gonna throw everything away over this? It's nothing."
When you refused to be won over so easily, seeing right through his tactics, he would start showing up wherever you were—home, work, the beach, anywhere you were, he was there too, desperately trying to intimidate you into talking to him with his piercing gaze and menacing stance.
He would corner you, trying to force a reaction out of you. "So what, you're just going to act like I don't exist?" He'd ask harshly before softening, brushing a strand of hair from your face, his knuckle lightly grazing your cheek as he did. "C'mon, baby, I know you miss me, miss us." He could see the resolve in your eyes crumbling and it made him feel powerful and triumphant, but before you opened your mouth to speak, Kiara swept in, grabbing your arm and tugging you away from Rafe as she shot a glare in his direction.
This infuriated Rafe. Typical Pogue, always sticking their nose where it doesn't belong and fucking up his life.
From there, he attempted sending you expensive gifts with notes like "Just talk to me, baby. Let me fix this," and when that didn't work, he turned to threats, saying he would hurt himself or you if you didn't hear him out.
Finally, he showed up to your house in the middle of the night, his eyes bloodshot and puffy, pupils dilated. You hesitated but decided to open the door, and when you did, you felt guilty for ignoring him for so long. He looked absolutely wrecked like he hadn't eaten or slept in days. He was clenching and unclenching his jaw, leaning against the doorframe and peering down at you. His presence was heavy, the air thick with tension as neither of you spoke.
"Let me in," he demanded. His fingers twitched at his sides before he rubbed them over his jaw. "I just—fuck, I don’t even know what to do anymore, baby." His large frame blocked the doorway, making you feel small as his eyes darted wildly. You felt a mix of guilt and fear stir in your stomach. "You’re just gonna keep pretending I don’t exist? Really?" His voice dropped lower, rougher. "’Cause if you don’t talk to me now, I swear to God, I’ll—" He stopped himself, his jaw clenching as he stared at you with hardened eyes, the threat clear. You knew he meant it.
"Rafe..." You said quietly, your voice trembling slightly as you looked up at him with wide eyes, feeling like you were looking at someone you didn't recognize.
His lips quirked up in a way that sent a shiver down your spine. “That’s all I needed, baby. Just needed to hear your voice," he whispered, stepping forward to invade your space and force you backward so he could come inside. "Y'know, I'd do anything for you, right?" He asked, the question rhetorical as he reached out to grip your jaw, forcing you to look at him. "I’ve been losing my fucking mind without you. I won't lose you. I can't lose you, alright? I-I need you. You're mine, you got that? You can't just walk away. You can't just ignore me. I won't let you."
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