#i literally just realized that reason i’ve been opening so much lately + the other manager that closes has had actual days off is bc we have

[blueeyedgirll]

Sneaking In - Sal Fisher x F!Reader

a/n: this is something i literally think about constantly :)> sneaking out was sal’s idea not yours there’s no delinquency here. unfortunately this is NOT part two of he’d loooove that because to be transparent i don’t know where to go with it! i promise i started it though it’ll come out soon •3•

this fic includes: boyfriend sneaking in trope, rebellion, sal ITCHING to see you, no use of y/n, for some reason you don’t have a screen on your window but whatever, established relationship, smooching, cuddling

The dark, late night sprawls outside as the twinkle of fairy lights keeps you awake. The chatter from the movie you were watching keeps your ears occupied as you consider texting or calling someone to ease the boredom overtaking you.

You settle on your boyfriend, Sal.

You and Sal had been dating for almost a year and a half. You started dating in the beginning of freshman year, and are still together now, halfway through sophomore year. Dating Sal had been nothing short of wonderful. He has always been such a kind and loving person, and it shows in your relationship. You and Sal are the kind of couple that people call “goals,” or talk about because they “need a relationship like that.”

You pick up your phone to text Sal, but upon reaching his contact, you decide to call him instead.

The line rings once, twice, and then he picks up.

“Hey, love. Are you alright? Why are you calling so late?” He says as less of a question for his sake and more to make sure you were okay.

“Yeah, I just missed you,” You respond.

“Well, I miss you too. I’m glad you called.” Sal pauses for a moment and you hear shuffling.

“What are you doing?”

“Trying to move Gizmo off my bed so I can lie down.”

You laugh at the thought of Sal trying his hardest to gently move his very large cat off the bed.

“Just pick him up,” You say, realizing that it’s in his nature to be gentle so he likely wouldn’t.

“No, he’s comfortable.” You hear him scoff in frustration and the thunk of him hitting the bed. “I give up.”

You laugh and change the subject.

“Well, what were you doing before you decided to evacuate Gizmo?”

“Honestly… I was trying to study for my history test, but I couldn’t stop thinking about you.”

“Oh yeah?”

“Oh, yeah. It was really hard to try to remember what years the American Revolution took place when the prettiest girl I’ve ever seen kept crossing my mind.”

His sudden compliment made you smile.

“Why, thank you. Luckily I wasn’t doing anything productive, because I promise you I would’ve been in the same boat…” You think for a moment. You both really miss each other, so why not make plans for the weekend?

“Sal, I want to see you. Want to hang out tomorrow?”

He pauses before he answers.

“Why wait?”

“What?”

“Why wait until tomorrow? I miss you now.”

You consider his point. You missed him now, too. But the thorough punishment that awaited you if your parents found out hung over you like a storm cloud.

“Sal, my parents will kill me if I sneak out.”

“Then let me.”

“My parents will also kill me if they catch me sneaking my boyfriend in my room in the dead of night. Can’t you hear how bad that sounds?”

“That’s why they won’t catch me. Please, baby? I can be sneaky, I promise.”

You pause for a moment.

You consider.

You decide the reward outweighs the consequences.

“Okay. I’ll see you in a few then?”

You can hear him silently cheer. “Yes you will. I love you.”

“I love you too.”

The phone beeps after the call ends. A rush of adrenaline and emotions flows through you as it fully processes that you’re sneaking your boyfriend in, but the risk just made it that much more fun.

A few minutes pass that consist of you switching between pacing your room and tidying up. You realize that Sal needs to get in somehow, so you turn to leave your room and unlock the back door. Before you could leave, however, you hear a tap on the window.

You throw open your curtains and it is none other than Sal. His electric blue hair illuminated by the moonlight, he stares up at you, eyes visibly crinkled through the eyeholes in his mask.

You open the window to let him in. He smiles up at you and hoists himself onto your windowsill before jumping silently onto your floor. He stops to look around for a moment, then pulls you into his arms.

“We have a door, you know,” You say teasingly.

“Where’s the fun in that?”

You smile at him and draw your hands around his neck, pulling his face closer to yours. You reach to the back of his head and unbuckle his mask, and he bows his head to let you.

You pull the mask off of his scarred face and he looks at you longingly with his bright blue lovesick eyes. Before either of you can speak, you both lean into a kiss. His lips meet yours in a unification powerful enough to make your knees tremble. He wraps a hand around your waist and pulls you deeper into the kiss, allowing you to run your hands through his soft hair.

"Wasn't this worth it? And, hey, I bet your parents are still sound asleep. They don't have a clue!" Sal drags out the last few words of his sentence in an excited whisper.

"Yeah, it was. Thank you for coming over."

"No problem. I missed you and it made me really want to see you."

"I can tell."

He smiles at your comment and moves to sit on your bed. You set his mask on your bedside table and follow his lead by propping yourself up on the headboard, patting the spot beside you to urge him over. He sits right next to you, wrapping an arm around your shoulder. He's so close that you can feel how warm he is through his sweater and smell his body wash.

He turns his head to give you a kiss on the cheek. You wrap your arms around his waist and fit your head into the spot between his neck and his collarbone, listening to his heart steadily beating.

"I love you," Sal whispers. "I love you, too."

[shadamyheadcanons]

Shadamy in high school headcannon

For Shadamytober 2024 - Day 3: Highschool Outcast

One poor anon sent in this ask an eternity ago. I started writing a full story for it, but I lost steam because I just can’t connect with high school romance stories the way I could when I was younger. I’ve been looking for an excuse to share the parts I did get done, though, and I just realized it suits the High School Outcast prompt for Shadamytober, so I can post it now!

Ignore that I’m late for that, too

Fair warning: I wrote this years ago, and I won’t be continuing it. It doesn’t end on a cliffhanger, but don’t go into this expecting any more!

@shadamytober

Amy sat in her math classroom at the start of the year, shaking like a leaf. She stuck out like a sore pink thumb in a class full of “the troublemakers,” as she’d always called them.

“Hey, Pinky, haven’t seen you around before.”

“What’re you doing Friday night? I’m free if you don’t have cheerleading practice.”

“I suck at math, but I’ll still give you private lessons if you want.”

In the process of averting her eyes from the student in front her, Amy spotted him in the far corner of the room: Shadow the hedgehog. A cold pit of unease settled in her stomach.

Of course he’s in this class. As if this room weren’t terrifying enough.

Most people agreed that Shadow was the scariest guy in school. His identity was shrouded in rumors. Some claimed he was a thief. Others said they’d seen him beat people up. Whatever the truth was, though, Shadow was surely bad news. He sat in the far corner of the room surrounded by a buffer of empty desks...and his red eyes were locked on her. She snapped her gaze away and held herself tightly.

It was actually a relief when the teacher started the lesson, shooting a glare of warning at the boys who were harassing Amy. She let out a sigh, hoping that would be the end of it as she stared at the board and attempted to make sense of the numbers and letters the teacher wrote. She tried to sort out the binomials, polynomials, functions, and variables as best she could, but she was hopelessly lost from the get-go. She shook with fear.

Something light hit Amy on the head. She frowned as she opened the balled-up piece of paper that had landed on her desk...only to find that it was a crudely-drawn image of the male anatomy. She yelped quietly, startled and disgusted, and the Mobians around her cackled quietly at her reaction. She swiftly crumpled up the piece of paper with her shaky hands and pushed it off of her desk.

The ruckus was loud enough to draw the teacher’s attention, but apart from threatening the boys with detention, he didn’t do much. Amy peeked up from her notebook and saw Shadow’s red eyes staring at her again. Her lower lip trembled.

She spent the rest of the period trying to write down equations she didn’t understand with a hand that wouldn’t stop shaking from the way her creepy classmates were leering at her. On top of that, she could practically feel the pair of red eyes watching her struggle through it.

Once the bell rang, Amy bolted straight to the bathroom and burst into tears in one of the stalls.

Is the whole year going to be like this?

Amy arrived as early as possible the next day so she could take a seat in the front right corner of the room. I’ll be closer to the door this time, and only three people can sit adjacent to me, so I won’t be surrounded. She nodded, confident in her reasoning.

A wrench was thrown into her plans when Shadow dropped into the seat next to her, having entered the otherwise empty classroom just after she did. She stiffened with anxiety and stared directly ahead with wide eyes.

Why here? WHY HERE?! Literally every other seat is empty! Don’t tell me he’s going to mess with me, too. I can’t handle this!

She whimpered quietly, but Shadow didn’t say anything. He didn’t even look at her. He took out a battered notebook and a pen with a chewed cap from a messenger bag that had seen better days, then placed them on the desk and rested his chin in his hand, half dozing off as he waited for class to begin. Amy watched with confusion out of the corner of her eye as she gingerly retrieved her pristine pink notebook and pencil, but he did nothing more.

More students started entering. Amy shrank in her seat and averted her gaze from the ones who had bothered her on the first day. Surprisingly, though, no one said a word to her. Some of them opened their mouths, only to snap them back shut and turn pale before scurrying off and sitting as far away as they could. Amy frowned, then looked over at Shadow. One of the boys from yesterday came up, only to turn tail when Shadow glared at him. She tilted her head, confused.

Is he...trying to isolate me...? She frowned. That can’t be it. He’s not even talking to me. Why bother?

By the time the teacher arrived, Amy and Shadow were sitting in the front corner while the rest of the students were gathered on the other side, leaving a row of empty desks around them. She would have laughed at the absurdity if she weren’t so terrified.

The subject material proved to be as elusive as ever, the equations being just as unsolved as the stoic, unmoving hedgehog beside her. To add to the enigma, Shadow wasn’t even taking notes. He examined the board with half-shut eyes, but there wasn’t a single word on his paper.

Amy rolled her eyes. Why even open the notebook if you’re not going to write anything? Is this guy even here to learn?

Still, it was nice not being harassed by multiple boys who wouldn’t leave her alone. They wouldn’t even look her way now. She decided the silence wasn’t so bad; even if she still didn’t get the math, at least she could focus on trying.

The teacher rattled off some problem about Train A going north and Train B going south at such-and-such speeds, then gave them a few minutes to work on it. Amy wrote down the information she hoped was important and started plugging in numbers to guess-and-check her way through it, knowing that even if she didn’t have the right technique, she’d get there eventually.

I guess the situation today is technically better. Just so long as he doesn’t do anything weird.

“You’re doing it wrong.”

Amy jumped at the voice. She turned with trepidation to see Shadow was staring at her, eyes just as harsh as ever. She’d never actually heard him speak before. His voice was low and smooth, oddly relaxing despite his blunt manner and message.

“Well...I was just gonna...” she squeaked, trailing off at the end.

Shadow looked at her for a moment longer, then turned back to his own desk. She let out a sigh of relief, only to freeze up when he ripped a page out of his notebook and shuffled his desk right up next to hers. Her heart pounded in terror at the close proximity. He spoke up again, apparently oblivious.

“You can make equations out of both of these. The ‘y’ value for both is where they are at a given time, the constant term is where they started, and the coefficient of x is their speed. Since we know they’re in the same place for the collision, the ‘y’ for both should match, so you can set them equal to each other and solve it.”

Amy’s mouth dropped open, and she looked back and forth between Shadow and her paper, torn between confusion, understanding, gratitude, and intimidation.

Shadow kept staring. “Solve it.”

Amy hunched down in front of her paper and picked up her pencil. “Okay,” she replied in a small voice.

It took Amy a minute or two, but she finally got it. She turned her elated grin to Shadow. He didn’t smile back, but he nodded approvingly and shuffled his desk back to its original spot.

After another ten minutes of perplexing explanations, the teacher gave them a few more problems to work on by themselves. By the time Shadow had raced through them, Amy was still stuck on the first one. He looked up from his desk, checked her notes, and sighed, almost sounding exasperated, but he shifted his desk back over and patiently explained the processes once more.

With his guidance, she completed the rest of the problems and sighed in relief. He shuffled his desk away to give her space again. She finished just in time for the teacher to assign their homework.

Amy peeked over at Shadow, trying to figure out what to say. Eventually, she settled on a simple “thank you.”

Shadow looked up one last time. Then, he snatched up the paper he’d used to show her the procedures and quickly scrawled something on it. He handed it back to her, and her eyes widened in surprise when she saw his name with a number written under it.

“Text me if you have trouble with the homework. Or don’t. I don’t care.”

Amy’s mouth dropped open, and she gawked after him as he packed up his bag and left.

What the hell?!

Amy’s eyes scrunched up as she stared at her homework that night. She’d finished about half of it with little trouble, but she stalled out when the equations grew more complex. She pressed her lips together before turning her gaze to the stray piece of paper she’d folded and kept in her notebook. She packed up her courage and picked up her phone, entering the unfamiliar number with shaking hands. She typed out a careful message and hesitated for a few seconds, then pressed Send.

Amy shifted from one foot to the other just outside the school library. She checked the time and held her books a little tighter in front of her.

A minute later, Shadow rounded the corner and walked directly toward her, looking just as intimidating as usual. She let out a sigh of relief. Thank God Shadow’s here... She scrunched up her nose. Now that’s something I never thought I’d say.

“Thanks for helping, Shadow. It’s super lucky that we have the same study period!”

Shadow just grunted in assent and walked right past her into the library to look for a seat. She frowned. He’s so helpful, but he’s like...this. Nice...but weird.

He made a beeline for a table all the way in the back next to a window. She took out her pink notebook and pencil once more. Just to make small talk, she asked, “Any reason you went for this table? Just curious.”

“The view from the window,” he explained. “The foliage is nice in the fall. In the wintertime, a layer of snow blankets the pine trees, and the pond freezes over. There’s a brief time in the spring when cherry blossoms bloom on that tree over there.” He said all of it calmly, his neutral expression still casually fixed on the pen he was retrieving from his bag.

Amy’s heart thumped. She gulped and clutched at her blouse over her heart. What the hell was that?!

Shadow glanced up at her pose and her wide eyes, then frowned. “What?”

She stayed tense for a moment, then shook it off. “Nothing! So, uh...I got this far...”

Shadow shifted closer to examine her answers. He nodded in approval and started walking her through the rest of the problems with quiet words and careful strokes of his pen. Her frazzled nerves calmed down at his soft voice, his easy explanations, and the muted sounds of the library.

When she had to do the problems herself, though, it was less relaxing. She could feel his eyes on her while she wrote. Wanting to break the uncomfortable silence, she gathered her courage while she erased one of her attempts, then spoke to her intimidating companion.

“So, um...if you’re this good at math, why aren’t you in the advanced sequence?”

Shadow stared down at her shy expression for a moment longer. He suddenly let out an amused “hmph,” though he still didn’t smile. “You know Mr. Robotnik?”

Amy groaned and let her head roll back to look at the ceiling. “Oh, God, do I!” His gaze turned inquisitive, and she smiled sheepishly. “Ah, yeah...why?”

He closed his eyes and shook his head. “His class was boring, and he was really annoying, so...I amused myself.” Amy tilted her head, curious. He crossed his arms. “He insists on being called “Dr. Robotnik” and gets pissed off if you call him “Mr. Robotnik,” but I was bored and didn’t like him, soooo...I did that. A lot. On purpose.”

Amy’s eyes went wide at his deadpan expression. She tried—and failed—to hide her laughter. She stifled it as best as she could to avoid being scolded by the librarians. Shadow just stared, seemingly thrown off. Once her giggles died down, Amy quietly asked, “Let me guess: he put you in the lower sequence just because he didn’t like you?”

Shadow put his elbow on the table and rested his head in his hand, interested. “How’d you know?”

“Pfft.” Amy shook her head. “I wasn’t always this bad at math. I was pretty good with numbers, but once they started adding letters, they kinda lost me. I probably would have been okay if I hadn’t been stuck with him.” Shadow’s expression changed. It almost looked...sympathetic? Amy decided she was imagining things and continued on. “He’s brilliant, but he’s a horrible teacher. I just kept falling behind, and he was too much of a jerk to help me. Thanks to him, my grades took a nose-dive. I don’t think I’ll ever be able to catch up.”

“You will.”

Amy paused. “What?”

Shadow nodded to the paper and pointed to all the problems she’d gotten right. “You’ve already gotten better. With a little help, you’ll catch up again in no time. You’re a smart girl.”

Amy was stopped in her tracks once again. That’s the first compliment he’s given me. It’s the first nice thing I’ve heard him say about anyone. Knowing it came from someone like Shadow only made it hit harder. A grin spread across her face.

Shadow remained stone-faced as always. “So what were you saying about him not liking people?”

Amy laughed shyly. “Well, ah...you know how you messed with him because you didn’t like him? Uh...I didn’t like him, either, so...” She scratched the back of her head. “I’m the one who got everyone to start calling him ‘Eggman.’ It was just too much fun to see him get bent out of shape! Even if I’d had the grades, he never would have sent me to the advanced classes.”

Shadow’s neutral expression finally broke, leaving surprise in its wake. “That was you?!” He looked her up and down, from the pink variation of the school uniform she’d chosen, to the matching flower-adorned headband, to her cheery, innocent face. “Really?”

Breaking through his façade sent a thrill through Amy’s chest. Mischief crept into her tone. “What, a girl like me can’t have a rebellious streak?”

“Huh.” Shadow scratched his chin, intrigued. “I guess people can surprise you.”

Amy grinned back.

No kidding.

With Shadow’s help, Amy finished her homework just before the bell rang. The two of them walked to class together, drawing more than a few stares. She was shy about it at first, but something about the way Shadow never seemed bothered by how people looked at him rubbed off on her, instilling her with a unique form of confidence she’d never had before. It wasn’t just his flat, unfazed expression, either. It was the way he walked, head held high, never hunched down under the stares he drew. He didn’t even bother to wear his uniform correctly; his jacket was partly unbuttoned, and his red tie hung loosely around his neck.

At last, one set of eyes stopped him in his tracks. The vice principal loudly scolded him for his disheveled appearance. He reluctantly tightened his tie and buttoned his jacket properly, sighing and rolling his eyes as he did so. The vice principal snapped at him about his uniform and bad attitude once more before walking away, her high heels clacking harshly against the tiled floor of the hallway. Amy peeked at his dapper ensemble and examined it in surprise.

He’s...actually kind of handsome like this...

Amy shook her head furiously to try and rid herself of the strange thought. Then, once the high heels were no longer audible, Shadow let out a single chuckle...and smirked just a little bit.

While Amy was still processing the first kind-of smile she’d ever seen on Shadow, he unbuttoned his jacket all the way. He slipped a finger into his tie and pulled out the knot entirely to let it hang completely free around his neck. He even unbuttoned the top two buttons on his dress shirt, showing a white patch of fur underneath it. He put his hands in his pockets and strutted defiantly to class, oblivious to Amy’s inner turmoil. She snapped her head forward and tried to ignore the flush she knew had spread across her cheeks.

Why does he look even more attractive when he’s sloppy?!

A week or two passed, and Amy fell into a routine: math class, homework, getting help from Shadow during study period, then math class once more. At one point, she admitted that she felt bad monopolizing his study hour and offered to pay him or leave him alone, but he just looked confused, so she didn’t mention it again.

One day, Amy was checking her schedule at the end of math class, sensing she’d forgotten something important. Shadow packed up his bag and spoke.

“Library as usual tomorrow?”

Amy opened her mouth to answer, but then she cringed. “Shit...I have a dentist appointment tomorrow!”

“Hmph.” Shadow shrugged. “No school. Nice.”

She shook her head. “No, see, I’m only missing half the day. I’ll be here just in time for math class, but I’ll miss study hour!”

“Ah.” Shadow nodded in understanding. “That’s a waste. You get time off, but it’s a study period instead of an actual—”

He was cut off when Amy took his shoulders and started shaking him. “Shadow, you don’t get it!” Panic crept into her tone as she shook him. “If I’m not here for our study period, I won’t get any help, and I won’t be able to do well on my homework, and I’ll fall behind again, and I’ll flunk out and have to run away and join the circus—”

“Amy. Stop.” At his firm command, she froze. His expression was half-amused and half-exasperated as he gingerly removed her hands from his shoulders. “None of that is going to happen, I promise...especially not the circus part...but if it’ll make you feel better, we can work on it somewhere else, okay?”

At the comforting look in his warm red eyes, she relaxed. “Okay.” She thought for a moment, and her eyes lit up. “Can’t we just go to the library after classes are done?”

“The library closes early on Mondays and Tuesdays. It stays open later Wednesday through Friday, and it’s open from ten am to ten pm on weekends. It’s Monday, though, so we won’t have enough time.”

Shadow stared at her and waited, having rattled off his response rapid-fire. Amy’s baffled look made way for a small smile. “You’ve really got those hours down, huh? You must love reading!”

He looked away and scratched the back of his head. “Yeah, something like that.”

Amy thought for a moment more, then shrugged. “We could always just study at my house, if you don’t mind.”

At that, Shadow jammed his hands into the pockets of his school uniform and looked sideways at her. “I’m comfortable with that, but...are you?” he asked tentatively.

Amy looked at him funny. “Of course. Why wouldn’t I—” She cut herself off when she remembered she was talking to Mr. Scariest-Guy-in-School, and that he probably knew that just as well as she did. She smiled and waved it off. “Yeah! For sure!” When he hesitated, she added, “My mom will be there. She gets home early on Mondays.”

Shadow visibly relaxed. He looked off into space, and then something seemed to occur to him. “Oh, but I can’t go right away. I have something to do at the end of the day first. It’ll take maybe fifteen minutes.”

Amy shrugged. “I don’t mind. It’ll give me time to get set up.” And clear off my cluttered desk...and hide all my embarrassing stuffed animals...and make sure I don’t have any weird tabs open on my computer... “I’ll text you my address, okay?”

He paused and shifted his weight to his other foot. “So...how far is it?”

“It’s close.” She typed in the address and sent it. “I normally just walk there.”

She almost missed the way his shoulders relaxed. “Walking distance. Cool.”

Amy nodded happily and put away her phone. “Thanks, Shadow. You really didn’t have to do this.”

“It’s not a big deal.”

Amy snorted. “I still appreciate it, though.” On a whim, she stepped forward and pulled him into a hug, just as she did with her other friends.

Technically speaking, it was the strangest hug she’d ever given. He didn’t push her away, but he didn’t hug back, either. He just stood a little stiffly and waited for her to finish. When she pulled away, his face was completely blank, as if he’d never encountered a hug before and didn’t know how to react.

Amy had to hold back a loud snort of amusement at his lack of response. “I’ll see you in a bit, Shadow!”

She dashed out of the classroom, ignoring the confused students around her and still sensing the inquisitive red eyes at her back. She giggled to herself.

We’ll work on it.

Amy shuffled the last of the clutter under her bed and grinned in satisfaction. Good enough! She peeked out the window. No Shadow yet. She glanced back at her desk and the second chair she’d dragged in, and concern briefly crossed her mind. Maybe it’s a bad idea to choose the desk in my room to share with the kind-of-scary guy I barely know. She frowned. Is this why my dad says I have no sense of self-preservation?

The doorbell rang out, jolting Amy out of her thoughts. She bounded down the stairs to answer it, and her eyes bugged out when she saw Shadow there.

I couldn’t see him anywhere two seconds ago. How fast is he?!

She set her thoughts aside and opened the door for him with a smile. “Hey, Shadow!”

He wasn’t looking at her. Instead, his face was turned upward. He tilted it back down to fix her with a deadpan look. “Your house is huge.”

“Huh?” She was thrown off, but he just walked right inside. “I mean...kind of? It’s not really—Shadow, wait!”

He flinched and stopped. “What?”

Amy stepped past him and pointed to her own socked feet and the shoes lined up neatly at the door. She crossed her arms and tapped her foot. He looked unimpressed, but he rolled his eyes lazily and slipped out of his own shoes. She nodded, satisfied.

Shadow followed her up the stairs. The humbled expression he carried on his face as he looked around didn’t escape her notice, especially when he stepped into her room and blatantly examined its pink and red decor. She held her hands behind her back and looked at him sideways. “Is everything okay?”

His gaze snapped back to her. “It’s really girly.” She hesitantly opened her mouth to speak, but then he slipped his messenger bag off his shoulder. “It suits you.”

He didn’t look at her again as he sat down. She stood awkwardly, mouth open. “Uh...thanks?” He nodded a little, either not comprehending the weirdness of it or not caring. She shook it off and took out her math homework. Was that a compliment? I swear, I’m never gonna figure this guy out.

The two went over the premise of the homework, and Shadow helped iron out the bits she hadn’t gotten in class. While she was working on the second problem, she broke the silence. “So what did you have after school? Anything exciting?”

“Hmph. Not really. It’s the same thing I do every day.”

“And what’s that? Oh, but you don’t have to answer that if you don’t want to—”

Shadow shrugged. “I don’t mind. Sometime last year, a group of guys were bullying this rabbit middle schooler outside the west wing of the school. Teasing her, pulling her ears, shit like that.” She looked up in surprise to see he was fixing the paper in front of him with a searing glare. He shut his eyes and crossed his arms. “So I beat the shit out of them. Turns out she was waiting for her mom, so now I wait with the kid every day after school to make sure it doesn’t happen again.” He opened his eyes again and looked up at Amy, who’d stopped writing. “What?”

Amy snapped her mouth shut, realizing it had fallen open a bit as he told his story. Her heart softened, and she smiled adoringly at him. “That’s so kind of you!”

He fidgeted and looked at her sideways. “Uh...beating people up...?”

His uncharacteristic hesitation and movements reminded Amy that he wasn’t used to being looked at that way. She felt a twinge of pain at the idea, but she pushed it aside. “No, I mean standing up for her! Waiting around every day just to make sure she’s okay. That’s really sweet of you.”

Shadow opened his mouth, clearly unsure of how to deal with the sentiment. He crossed his arms again and shut his eyes. “It’s not a big deal. Anyone else would have done the same.”

Amy wasn’t sure about that, but she didn’t want to argue. Instead, she rested an elbow on the desk and leaned her cheek into her palm to look at him more closely. “Everything people say about you is wrong, huh?” When he just blinked at her, she panicked and backtracked. “I mean—! It’s not like—there are, well...y’know, rumors...and you know how people are...” She cringed and trailed off.

He huffed. “It’s fine, I know what people say about me.” He leaned his arm on the desk and turned his body to face her. “People talk. It happens.”

Amy pouted. “Are you...okay with that?”

He paused, choosing his words carefully. “Being the ‘scary guy’ isn’t always fun, but it’s not all bad. No one messes with you if they won’t go near you.”

Amy thought of the empty desks that always surrounded Shadow and the wide berth he was always given in the cafeteria. She thought of his atypical social habits and the way even a simple hug could throw him off. Her heart stung.

Oblivious, Shadow kept going. “And if no one messes with me, then I can protect other people, too. My family. Kids who are being bullied. And, uhh...” He scratched his head and looked away.

Amy narrowed her eyes in suspicion, and then a bright smile graced her face. “That’s what you were doing in math class, wasn’t it? On the second day, when you sat next to me.”

At the reminder, Shadow’s expression twisted just a little in...embarrassment? He covered half of his face with his hand. “Yeeeaaaahhhh, uh...I may have overdone it. You looked so upset on the first day, like you were about to cry...so I scared off anyone who I thought might upset you again...but by the end of it, I’d scared off everyone, and you were more afraid of me than you were of them.”

Amy matched his cringing face with her own. “Was it that obvious?”

He uncovered his face. “By the time we got around to the math part, you looked like you were about to piss your pants.”

Amy’s expression turned bitter at the image, and then she let out a brief chuckle. “Gotta admit, I was pretty petrified...but I still felt comfortable enough to text you for help, didn’t I? That has to be worth something.”

He scratched his chin and looked up at the ceiling. “So you’re more scared of math than you are of me...” He nodded. “I’ll take it. It’s better than I usually do with people.”

Amy wasn’t sure whether to laugh or cry at that. She chose to laugh, and she considered it a victory when she saw him let out the slightest chuckle in response.

By the time they’d hit the five o’clock hour, Amy had been done with her homework for a while, but she hadn’t asked Shadow to leave, and he hadn’t shown interest in going anywhere anytime soon, either. After plenty of surprisingly enjoyable conversation, though, the alarm on Shadow’s phone went off. He squinted at the cracked screen, then showed a face that looked almost disappointed, though it could have been Amy’s imagination.

“I have to get home and make dinner for my family. You all set?”

Amy’s heart sank more than she’d expected it to. “Yeah.” She reluctantly descended the stairs with Shadow in tow.

Once she reached the door, though, her eyes lit up. “Hey, um...” She steeled herself. “Do you want to, maybe...hang out again? Not just for math.” When he just stared at her, she panicked. “Oh, I don’t mean—not in, like...a weird way, I just like talking to you!”

She didn’t know how to say ‘it’s not a date’ without actually saying that, but Shadow seemed to pick up on her meaning anyway. He stared off into space for a moment, then nodded a little, as if mulling it over. He looked back down at her and shrugged. “It’s been a while...but yeah. Sure.”

Amy grinned, then frowned as a sad thought hit her. “Do you not have any other friends to hang out with?”

He frowned a little. “Yeah, but...” He scratched the back of his head idly. “I used to hang out with my friend Rouge a lot, but then she graduated, and now she’s in a training program to become a government spy.”

Amy made an intrigued noise. “Government spy? That sounds impressive!”

“Hmph. Don’t tell her that, she’ll get a swelled head.” He paused and looked away. “We’re still good friends, but she lives three hours away now, so...I don’t have...” He cut himself off and pressed his lips together. “I spend a lot of time by myself these days.”

Sympathy touched Amy’s heart, but she shook it off in favor of smiling up at him. “Well, I’d be happy to be your friend! What do you say, Shadow?” She held out her hand for a handshake.

He looked from her chipper face to her hand. After a moment, a small smirk showed itself on his face. He ignored the hand and pulled her into a quick side-hug. “Sounds good to me.”

After that, he abruptly dashed off with such speed that the wind he whipped up nearly knocked her over. Her heart pounded at his dramatic exit. Once she’d calmed down, Amy smiled.

It was only a quick side-hug...but it’s a start.

[That’s all she wrote...literally. From here, Amy convinces Shadow to join the track team along with her, Sonic, Blaze, and Espio so he can have more friends, and they become a couple along the way. Some people are disapproving at first, but they come around in time. Shadow’s family is also poor, and he’s very dedicated to his chronically ill sister, who winds up being very fond of Amy. I mentioned a few more details in this post.

Cliché? Maybe, but it’s a nice reminder of how far I’ve come as a writer, I think.

Poor anon probably forgot they even sent this ask. I hope they’re still on tumblr to get the notification, lmfao.]

[whumpninja]

W.M.D., Part 1: Living Weapon

Featuring: living weapon whumpee, heavy and literal dehumanization, lab whump, blindfolded whumpee, creepy whumper, brainwashing, memory loss

Taglist: @whumperofworlds

The meeting had been scheduled for 1:00. Mr. Abel showed up at 1:48, drinking something neon pink in a plastic cup and smiling apologetically. “Just chalk me up as ‘fashionably late’,” he quipped, extending his hand for a shake. “Nolan Abel, but you probably knew that, I’m everywhere. You’re Algernon Fowler, right? The scientist?”

Dr. Fowler stared witheringly at Mr. Abel’s extended hand, waiting for the man to realize that the empty right sleeve of Dr. Fowler’s lab coat was pinned up and out of the way. It took an embarrassingly long time for Mr. Abel to withdraw his hand, and even then, Dr. Fowler wasn’t sure whether he noticed or just wanted to end the awkward stare down.

“Is this your lab?” Mr. Abel asked, looking up at the top of the abandoned clock tower. “It’s…nice.”

“It is adequate,” Dr. Fowler replied. The billionaire nearly jumped at the low, whispery sound of his voice, and Dr. Fowler held back a twisted smile. “If I decide to enter into a partnership with you, I will require a more…updated facility.”

“Sure, Doc, no problem. I’ve got one all set up that nobody’s used in awhile. But I was told that I would be getting a…preview?”

Dr. Fowler nodded to the open door of his clock tower-turned-laboratory. “Just through there.”

Mr. Abel finished his drink as he entered, carelsssly tossing the plastic cup aside. It clattered on the pavement. Ignorant buffoon, Dr. Fowler thought, and followed him inside, shutting- and locking- the heavy door behind them.

“Got yourself a fixer-upper, huh?” Mr. Abel glanced around the first floor. “What a mess.”

“The natural consequences of my work. Science is not always clean.” Where Mr. Abel saw old, yellowing papers littering the floor and broken furniture pushed up against the grimy walls, Dr. Fowler saw nothing but promise and potential in the empty space. He’d thrown the papers out because he had advanced beyond their contents. He’d shoved the furniture away because he needed room to work. Even the location was important- in the middle of the most downtrodden, poverty-stricken part of the city. The building itself had been carefully chosen- a modern laboratory would have been inaccessible and drawn too much attention. The clock tower was perfect for his needs. Whatever mess the foolish Mr. Abel saw, Dr. Fowler could overlook in favor of the results that would come out of it.

“So where’s your brilliant masterpiece?” Mr. Abel asked. Dr. Fowler didn’t appreciate his teasing tone. “You said you had something special to show me.”

“I do. Upstairs.” Dr. Fowler led the way up the twisting metal staircase to the next floor of the clock tower- there were five in all. He rarely used the first floor. The second and third were his workspaces, as was the underground floor Mr. Abel did not- and would not- know about. The fifth floor was empty save for the ancient clock.

It was the fourth floor where his masterpiece lived. And it was the fourth floor where he led Mr. Abel.

“So you make weapons,” Mr. Abel said as they ascended. “Living weapons. You brainwash ‘em or something?”

Dr. Fowler scoffed. “Do not insult me. My work is no mere brainwashing or hypnotism. You may as well buy a robot if you merely want something to be commanded.” He shook his head. “The beauty of my work is in its balance. Too much, and you are left with a husk. Too little, and the result is unpredictable. There are many others in the business of making weapons. They all fall short. Their creations are mindless drones, suitable only for simple tasks.”

“And yours are different?”

Dr. Fowler smirked. “The secret of weapon making is not in the mind, but in the will. Unlike those imposters, I leave my subjects’ mind intact. What I remove is their free will. Once I am finished, they can still think for themselves. They can reason, find solutions to problems- they do not stand stupidly waiting for someone to command them. And yet they still obey commands, without question.”

“If it works like you say it does, I’ll definitely want some,” Mr. Abel answered.

“That is only the first step in my process. They must be trained as well. And there is another variable that must be accounted for.”

“What’s that?”

“Humanity. I have learned that the best way to create my weapons is to strip them of their humanity. If you’ve looked into my background, as I’m sure you have, you’ll know that I was a genetic biologist. One can make a man believe that he is less than a person. I take it one step further. I take the lie and make it true.”

They had reached the fourth floor. Dr. Fowler came out into the middle of the room first, waiting for Mr. Abel to catch up.

This floor was bare, nearly completely empty. The only things in the room were the scientist, the investor, and a figure that knelt in the center of the room, their head covered by a hood.

“You asked for proof, Mr. Abel. Here is my proof. My first successful masterpiece. Project Magnum Opus.” Dr. Fowler crossed the room and removed the hood. “Or, as I prefer to call him…Kestrel.”

Mr. Abel’s mouth dropped open as the kneeling form stood.

Dr. Fowler knew what he was seeing. A young man, or what had once been one, dark-haired and pale-skinned, hair tumbling down the neck and over the forehead to conceal the face in shadow. Bare-chested, showing a burn scar on the shoulder and smaller scars scattered over the torso. Slender, but with lean muscle corded through the lines of the body, a body made to be quick, agile and strong.

“He’s impressive. But, if I can ask, why do you call him Kestrel?” Mr. Abel asked.

A smile tugged the corner of Dr. Fowler’s lips. This man was even more oblivious than he had thought- even though the primary reason for that name was still concealed, there were still clues visible if one looked. Mr. Abel seemed to be a man who had to be shown.

Well, let me not disappoint him.

He stepped behind his weapon and unbuckled the harness around the shoulders, allowing Mr. Abel to see the evidence of the other side of his process. The billionaire actually staggered back in shock. “Are- are those real?” he breathed.

The massive black wings slowly unfurled to their full span. Dr. Fowler did not try to hide his smile now. “Of course they are. The talons are real as well.”

Mr. Abel had somehow not noticed that the weapon was barefoot, displaying the vicious curved talons that were so useful in combat, or that the hands too had talons rather than nails. If it weren’t for the blindfold over the face, he would have also seen the piercing golden eyes. The wings and talons were enough, however, and he clung to the staircase railing like he would fall out of pure shock if he didn’t hold on to something.

“You may touch him if you like,” Dr. Fowler offered magnanimously. “He will not attack.”

Mr. Abel looked distinctly nervous and Dr. Fowler reveled in it. “Are- are you sure?”

“He will not attack,” Dr. Fowler repeated. “That is, not unless I tell him to.”

Mr. Abel approached cautiously, stretching out his hand like a small child about to pet a large dog. Kestrel watched him impassively, blinking once or twice. Mr. Abel stroked the edge of the wing, his mouth stretching into a grin. “Wow,” he said. “It feels real. How’d you do it?”

Dr. Fowler smiled, and leaned close to Kestrel’s ear, and whispered, “Corpus et sanguinis. Strike.”

Mr. Abel didn’t hear the exact words, but he certainly saw the effects. Kestrel went rigid for a split second before leaping into motion, knocking Mr. Abel to the floor, the head tilting to the side as the predator found the prey even without the use of sight. The wings were useless in this confined space, but spread out anyway, helping to terrify Mr. Abel even more thoroughly. The man was screaming, horror twisting his face as a sharp talon tore a gash in his sleeve.

“Hold, Kestrel,” Dr. Fowler said. Kestrel froze, still keeping the man pinned to the floor. Dr. Fowler waited a few more moments, savoring the look of fear on Mr. Abel’s face, before he commanded, “Release him.”

Kestrel let go and stepped back, and Mr. Abel staggered to his feet, white-faced. Mr. Abel glanced from one to the other, shaking, panting, his eyes wide. He pointed a trembling finger at Dr. Fowler. “I could sue you for that, Fowler. I could sue you for all you’re worth and have your- your- thing shot.”

“No, you couldn’t,” Dr. Fowler answered. “Not without admitting that you were ever here in the first place, which, Mr. Abel, you cannot do without coming under scrutiny so intense that all your filthy little secrets will be dragged out into the light right beside me. You would lose everything, and you are not the kind of man who would risk that.” The corner of his lips turned up. “Besides, you said you wanted a preview. That is what you were given.”

The anger stayed a moment longer, fury darkening Mr. Abel’s eyes. Dr. Fowler waited, unconcerned.

Finally, Mr. Abel pulled himself to his feet, laughing sheepishly. “I guess I did want a sneak peek, didn’t I?” The anger bled out of him, replaced by intrigue. “Wow. I mean, that’s impressive. I want a dozen of them. You told anyone else about this?”

“No.”

“Don’t. I want you to be my private supplier.”

Dr. Fowler smiled. “What does a rich man need with living weapons?”

“You stick with your business and I’ll stick with mine.” Mr. Abel ran his hands through his hair, his face transitioning into an easy grin. “So how does he work? You said something to him before he jumped me.”

“When I begin the mental reprogramming process, I implement cue words,” Dr. Fowler explained, careful not to give too much away. “In the absence of anything else, the brain latches onto anything it is given. In this case, the trigger words. Once the process is complete, those specific words will place the weapon under the control of whoever speaks them.”

“And his words are…”

“Not for you.” Dr. Fowler folded his arms. “I will make you your own weapons. Kestrel is mine.”

Mr. Abel shrugged. “Sure.”

The man seemed to have gotten over his fear, approaching Kestrel- although, Dr. Fowler noticed, he did not touch the weapon this time. “So what are his limits?” he asked. “I mean, he’s the prototype of mine, right? What can he do?”

“Anything you command.”

“Could I order him to fetch me a vodka with lime?”

“Kestrel is not some sort of personal butler,” Dr. Fowler said, his smile disappearing. “Kestrel is a weapon, perfectly designed for that purpose and that purpose alone. Not a toy for a rich man’s amusement.”

“Could you make one that is?”

Dr. Fowler sighed. “If that is what you would like, I can do it. I suppose you want it to be beautiful, barely clothed, and enamored with you, as well?”

The billionaire grinned. “If it’s not too much trouble.”

Self-obsessed fool.

“Do you always make them…animal hybrids?”

“Yes. It tends to be more stable when I do that, and as I said before it helps the reprogramming process. I have tried many kinds, on many candidates. Kestrel has the DNA of a species of vulture.”

“That where the wings came from?” Mr. Abel walked around to look at the weapon’s back, where the wings protruded from the shoulder blades.

“The wings were originally from a California condor,” Dr. Fowler answered. “I grafted them into Kestrel. DNA can do many things, but it cannot give something wings. The talons and the eyes, yes. The wings required help.”

“Huh.” Mr. Abel looked sufficiently impressed. As much as he disliked the billionaire, Dr. Fowler had still hoped to take his breath away with his demonstration, and it seemed as though he had been successful. “So how many of these weapons can you make for me?”

“How much time do you have?” Dr. Fowler asked instead of answering directly.

Mr. Abel frowned. “Why does time matter?”

“Do you think it is an easy thing to create one of my masterpieces? That I can snap my fingers or hold up a swaying pendant and they’ll be ready to do whatever I command? The human will is the most stubborn force on this planet, Mr. Abel. To break it into splinters and scrape it out, to fill the empty mold back up with your desires, to make sure the vessel does not shatter under the pressure- it takes time.”

“How much time?”

“Months.”

“What?”

Dr. Fowler continued as if he hadn’t heard. “And of course, I must have the perfect candidate. I have tried this method again and again. All attempts ended in disaster. Some subjects did not survive the initial operation. Some lasted longer, but the strain of being reprogrammed was too much for them, and they died or became comatose. Some survived reprogramming, but as empty shells that could not move without being commanded, that had to be told to even breathe. It took years, Mr. Abel, years of failure, before I finally succeeded with Kestrel. But I think you’ll agree that the results are worth the effort.”

“Where do you get candidates?”

Dr. Fowler shrugged. “Kestrel is an excellent hunter. I sometimes have him bring them to me, but that tends to draw too much attention. I prefer more subtle methods. Money is a splendid lure. People who have no other option will gladly submit themselves to scientific study for the mere promise of cash in their hand. Though, of course, they stop having a use for money long before I would have to pay them.”

“You’re really committed to this, Doc.”

Dr. Fowler pinned the man with a look. “This is my life’s work, Mr. Abel. I am as devoted to it as a mother to her child. No force on this earth could sway me from this path. No amount of begging or bribery, threats or tears, no amount of opposition can stop me once I begin my work. It is not an easy road to walk, but I walk it, and it does not matter what obstacles are placed in my way. I have set out to create the perfect living weapons. That is what I will do, no matter how many tries takes. No matter how many bodies I have to bury. I will suceed.” Abruptly the smile returned to his face. “I have succeeded, with Kestrel. Though of course there are always improvements that can be made.”

“So how do I do this, when I get mine? What happens if he disobeys?”

“My weapons cannot disobey.”

“Okay, what about when he does something I want?”

“What do you mean?”

Mr. Abel shrugged. “If I tell him to do something and he does it. Do I click a button, or give him a reward or something?”

Dr. Fowler smiled humorlessly. “Yes, he gets a reward.” He trailed his gloved fingers down the side of Kestrel’s face, ghosting over the blindfold. He was always careful to avoid touching Kestrel with his bare hands- skin-to-skin contact could have an adverse affect on the training.

“What kind of reward?” Mr. Abel wanted to know.

“He gets to live.” Dr. Fowler moved his hand lower, wrapping it around Kestrel’s throat. He didn’t squeeze. He didn’t have to. Kestrel knew he could. That was enough.

“I do not tolerate disobedience, Mr. Abel. If one of my creations fails me, I destroy it, and start again with a new base. There is never a shortage of test subjects in this city.”

It was, at least partially, a bluff. Dr. Fowler did not get attached to his creations, but Kestrel was his first true success. It would take a failure of great magnitude for him to start over. There were other ways to discipline a weapon.

Mr. Abel was grinning. “So far, Doc, I’m seeing no drawbacks.”

Dr. Fowler replaced the hood over Kestrel’s head, gesturing Mr. Abel towards the staircase. This time he let the billionaire go first, all the way back down to the ground floor. “What do you think?” he asked.

Mr. Abel hummed, stroking his chin. “I think this could be the beginning of a beautiful partnership. I’ll have one of my lawyers write up a contract-“ at Dr. Fowler’s warning glance, he held up a hand. “And I’ll leave out any details to keep your secrecy. You can add those in yourself.”

“That is appreciated.”

“But I want one more thing in exchange, Doc. I like what I’ve seen so far, I do. And I love the idea of having my own personal weapon who will do anything I tell it to.” He folded his arms, and suddenly the foolish billionaire seemed slightly less so. “Your Kestrel. I want to see him fly. Tomorrow morning.”

“You- what?” Dr. Fowler was not often taken aback. But this request sent him reeling a little. “Kestrel isn’t used to flight. I don’t send him out often, and then always under cover of darkness.”

“Exactly. I want to see the reaction to him, if there is one. If the government has a conniption fit and comes down on you, I don’t want to be involved.” He spoke bluntly, without shading the truth. Dr. Fowler grudgingly appreciated that. “And I want to see those wings in action. You can send him out early enough that there won’t be many people on the beach. But I want to see what he does when he’s away from you. No offense, but I’m betting he takes off.”

Dr. Fowler pressed his lips into a thin smile. There were still some things this man didn’t know. “All right, Mr. Abel. I will take you up on that bet. Tomorrow morning, I will send Kestrel out. And we’ll see what happens then.”

Mr. Abel returned his smile. “We will, won’t we?”

They shook hands on it.

[tangents-within-tangents]

The thing about the "Clone Rebellion" show

I've become a lot more critical of The Bad Batch lately and I think I realized that’s because it’s over. 

That means that 1. I can look back on the whole show retrospectively, and 2. any issues or hopes I had no longer have a chance to be addressed or resolved.

I realized I’ve been very caught up in thinking about the missed potential of the show, and a lot of my disappointment/frustration with the direction TBB took (esp in regards to the "reg" clones) is coming from the fact that a Clone Rebellion show does not exist to make up for it. For now this is all we have, and it’s hard for me to just accept TBB for what it is, because I at least have been operating under the assumption that this is all we're going to get, that this fabled spin-off show is just not going to happen. 

Because here’s the thing: We all kinda talk about it as if it's a given, a not if but when, but as far as I can tell the concept came entirely from the fans. Just speculation and wish-fulfillment. I don’t really keep up with news/interviews/behind the scenes stuff, but I’m pretty sure there have never been any mentions from official sources (y'all freaked out about one animation job listing that could be for literally anything). If there's something I’ve missed let me know, but for now at least there have been no announcements or plans or anything.

The only thing really is that the gaps left in TBB feel like intentional setup (we never got an Echo and Rex solo episode like we did with Crosshair and Cody which feels like they are saving it for something else, Echo’s fate was specifically left open-ended by not mentioning him (for better or for worse) in the epilogue, Emerie joins them at the end setting up for a female character to be in the main cast, etc) but that still doesn’t guarantee that we will ever actually get a show. That feels more like leaving the possibility open, not necessarily making plans. Especially since TBB actually puts any potential Clone Rebellion show in a really weird position:

There's a lot of important clone-relevant stuff going on during TBB (like Order 66, Kamino, the stormtrooper bill, Tantiss) but I doubt they would go back and show that again since it would either be repetitive by rehashing TBB’s timeline, or confusing by relying too much on people having watched another show. Yeah most people probably would have, but that still doesn’t work very well narratively if your important beats are just implied and happening offscreen. Like I would kill to see more of Nemec and Fireball but then they would just disappear after being killed off (for pretty much no reason) in another show! Hemlock and Tantiss base were designed specifically to be clone-centered threats, and the underground network were the ones who actually spent time searching for it, but then they weren’t there for the rescue so there would be no resolution. But if we instead pick up at the end of TBB it seems like most clones have already been phased out of the Empire by then anyway. Yes you could still make things work either way and come up with new plots and stuff but it’s still a tight spot to be in and it doesn’t really feel like the writers took that into account.

Whether we do get another show or not, I think it still had a negative impact on TBB though. Like that show already had a cameo problem, but 'setting up potential future show at the expense of the current one' is such an issue in any media (esp Star Wars and Marvel these days). Since we got pieces of both 'important stuff happening to the clones' and 'fun mercenary adventures with the Batch' rather than just committing to one or the other, or equally to both, it just causes issues for both shows. I’ve been working on a full post about the lost potential, but for now I’ll summarize as:

It hurts TBB bc we get these glimpses of a more meaningful story that our main characters, the ones the show decides to dedicate screen time to, choose not to participate in. It’s like that trope/bad writing thing where the story they mention (Budapest, or like the Cullens' backstories) sounds more interesting than the one they are actually showing us. Like it’s okay that the Batch didn’t take the same route as Echo and Rex, but the route they did take should be of equal or greater importance/intrigue, and it just really wasn’t. It was mostly directionless side quests and that made the characters seem selfish and a lot of the plots feel filler-y because there are so many important things going on elsewhere. 

It's just starting to feel unlikely that we'll get TWO post-RotS "clone-centered" shows, so why waste the one we did get avoiding the more important clone-centered storyline? Why not at the least equally divide the time you did have between the Batch and Echo and Rex? Why make an ensemble show if you're not going to try to actually balance all the characters? Why bring back a fan favorite clone just to push him to the sidelines and ignore all his potential? Why focus on the "clones" who aren't affected by/don't care about clone issues?

Believe me, I still want a show focusing on Rex and Echo's efforts to save the clones (I just wish it was the show we got in the first place)! I genuinely hope that we will get this show someday, not just because I love clones and this concept, but because I really see a need for it, there's a lot of gaps and potential to be filled there (which is also why I'm okay waiting bc frankly I don't trust the current state of Star Wars writers to properly handle that potential). But I’m treating it with a more “not until proven otherwise” approach (because we all know what happens when we get our hopes up lolll). So for now this is what we have, and unless that changes, I think we should treat it as such.

A lot of times when I see people mention the idea of a new show it's as a way to fix any issues within TBB. Like ‘this wasn’t resolved that well, maybe in the clone rebellion show…’ ‘Maybe Tech could still come back in the clone rebellion show’ ‘Maybe Crosshair’s character arc could be more complete…’ etc. But again we don’t know for sure if there ever will be another show, and even if there is, TBB should be able to stand on its own. There are some things I think another show could do (like address the plot hole of why the Empire never came back to Pabu, or actually doing something with the CX troopers) but narratively it does not work for major plot arcs or character development like that to be resolved elsewhere (like how a major Mandalorian plot point happened in the middle of TBOBF???). If we do get a Clone Rebellion show I don't think it would make much sense for the Batch to play much of a role in it. TBB ended with a clear send off for those characters, whether that was fully satisfying to you or not, that was the narrative intention. The Batch could show up as cameos, but this wouldn’t be their story anymore, and we know it couldn’t be because they were very intent on retiring and clearly never cared much about the regs or Empire so why would they suddenly change their minds?

A Tech lives plotline would have to be centered on the Batch, that’s his family, but that would just be really out of place in a separate show, especially post-finale (which confirmed that Tech did not come back in canon (at least until Omega joins the rebellion, if you want to be nitpicky ig)). There always could be ways to make it work anyway if you really wanted to, but we saw what retcon battles did to the Sequel Trilogy, and it still wouldn’t really fix any problems in TBB as a show. I’ve said it before, but if the writers were going to bring Tech back then they simply would/should have (they knew season 3 was the final season and they had plenty of time which they spent fighting space gators and whatnot instead).

I'm not saying this to spoil the fun or like dash anyone's hopes or anything. I don't actually know any more than anyone else, I have no impact on what Disney and Lucasfilm do (and clearly they don't really care about making narratively functional choices anyway, get roasted). For all I know this post could age horribly. I just had some thoughts to get off my chest, because I think it’s unproductive to judge TBB based on the idea of an unconfirmed potential other show--that does not (yet?) exist and wouldn't be about them--instead of looking at it for what it is. 

TBB is over. Canon happened, what we have is what we got. We can love it and hate it and critique it and write our au’s and fix-its, but I really think that it’s done. We have to make space for endings, that's an important part of storytelling (which is also why they need to be well-written but whatever). And we also have to make space for other stories to be told. The Batch had their show, they spent the screen time they had on what they did. Those characters got their time and they got a happy ending wrap up, and now it's (hopefully) time to let some other clones take the spotlight.

[razorblade180-heated]

A Talk

Jaune:Weiss, I would like to discuss something with you.

Weiss:*reading* I’m listening. You find another mission to take?

Jaune:Nah. I…wanted to talk about our sex life.

Weiss:….*slowly puts down book* What?

Jaune:We never really discuss it. We just go with the flow. Like if I’m satisfying you.

Weiss:*blushes* I promise you that I’ve never once faked a noise with you. Wait, am I slacking!?

Jaune:N- well…no. I wouldn’t say that.

Weiss:I don’t like that hesitation! What exactly does that mean.

Jaune:My hips have been getting a little tired.

Weiss:…Ah, I see. So you wanna do it less?

Jaune:Interesting how you’re not bringing out topping as a solution!

Weiss:Look! I…sigh it’s a little embarrassing at times.

Jaune:How is it any more embarrassing than anything else I do to you?

Weiss:*crimson* It’s hard to keep focus….

Jaune:*red* I don’t know how but you made that response kinda cute.

Weiss:Hush!

Jaune:Anyways, I didn’t start this conversation for that specifically. I wanted to know what other ways I could do better or try.

Weiss:What brought this on all of a sudden.

Jaune:To be honest, it’s still a little surreal you and I are together to begin with. *rubs head* I wanna do my best for you.

Weiss:(And he calls me cute…) First, I hope you realize I’m not the kind of person to lose interest just because the sex isn’t as phenomenal as it could be all the time, or even occasionally. There’s a thousand other reasons why I adore you Jaune Arc.

Jaune:That’s nice to hear. Not that I doubted there weren’t any. Still, I’d like to know you better. I won’t judge you.

Weiss:….*looks away* Well, I wouldn’t be upset if you were more aggressive or even strict. I’m not as delicate as I look; you know that.

Jaune:Aggressive how?

Weiss:You know…desire wise. I don’t mind if you’re a little impatient or brutish. *bright red* I could handle that just fine. *looks at him* You better actually give me advice too! It’s frustrating saying all of this.

Jaune:I like it when you’re honest.

Weiss:That’s even more embarrassing and frustrating!

Jaune:But you’re so beautiful when you’re like that. *smiles* It feels good knowing you’re loving it.

Weiss:Well you could also stand to be more confident, hmph! You literally have me in bed. Trust me, the difficult part is over. I can tell you overthink at times; though I guess that’s kept you alive in life.

Jaune:Anything in particular you wanted to…experiment with?

Weiss:Jaune!

Jaune:Like I said, won’t judge. I’m open to ideas.

Weiss could feel her face heating up. She slowly stepped toward Jaune and took his hand. Weiss raised it up for her cheek to rest in. Weiss looked at him with need as she gradually dragged his hand down to her neck to gently squeeze.

Weiss:I’m only going to say this once so you better pay attention.

Jaune:….

Weiss:…..Own me. Make me want to do nearly anything. I don’t need control; not when I’m safe with you.

Jaune:Weiss….

Weiss:I know that might sound a little much but-

Her heart leapt out of her chest as Jaune pulled her in quickly with a rough kiss that silenced her. His right arm kept her waist against his while his left held one of her wrist. A brief separation allowed her to catch her breath and clear head as he went back in for another.

Weiss:T-Timeout!

Jaune:Hmmm?

Weiss:Good start; amazing even. But I have to go to lunch in like fifteen minutes.

Jaune:Yang is always late.

Weiss:It’s with Winter.

Jaune:…That’s a little bit more serious. *rests head on her*

Weiss:Heh, sorry. What happened to this being a talk?

Jaune:I wasn’t expecting you to say something so…honest. How could I not want you right now?

Weiss:*flustered*…Well, we can pick up after I get back? Maybe try and show some of the things we’re interested in.

He was trying not to look pouty, which Weiss found adorable. His arms reluctantly left her body to both of their dismay. Weiss saw her blushing boyfriend lean back in. As she tilted her head up to meet his kiss, a tiny squeak left her lips when Jaune chose to bite the crook of her neck instead, gently kissing the newly made mark afterwards. Weiss instantly covered it, stunned from the surprise move as Jaune started to fix her collar and put her braid over her shoulders to cover it.

Jaune:Can’t say I entirely understand what you mean by “owning” but consider that proof you’re mine.

Weiss:…*inhales* Okay.

Weiss:*hurries out the door*

Jaune: *covers face* (Maybe that was too much?)

xxxxxxx

Weiss:(AAAAAAAAAHHHHHH) *reaches restaurant*

Winter:Weiss! *waves* Trying something new?

Weiss:Hm!?!

Winter:*points* Your hair.

Weiss:Oh, yeah. *inhales*…Yeah

[crisiscutie]

i really Love your HOS au!! i've considered sending a request for it but i'm not sure if they're open? i hope this isn't strange to say, but you're my favorite sephiroth writer and i literally visit your blog everyday! i try to engage with your posts and i'm sad that your writing isn't getting the attention that it deserves 🫂

This has been sitting in my drafts for a while because I struggled with how to get my thoughts down and needed some time away. For context: this is a late response to the overall discussion I had about engagement in early December.

First and foremost, thank you, anon, it really means a lot. The inbox is always open, and I deeply appreciate you and the few others who engage with my work. You know who you are. You guys truly rock and keep me going more than you probably realize.

But... I need to get something off my chest. There’s this growing disconnect with the audience of this blog that I can’t ignore anymore. And I will not lie; it’s been turning me off from writing and sharing lately.

Why? Because it feels like- No. I'm going to be blunt this time: Most of this blog's audience only cares about fictional dicks inside them and not much else. I doubt they're even reading this, since this post is not a fic about Sephiroth's dick. Can't get these people to show concern, courtesy, or give a single fuck about anything unless there's a fic involved.

Don't get me wrong, smut and other superficial content have their place (and I don’t think there’s anything inherently wrong with them), but it's not the purpose of this blog. I really wanted to explore so much more about FF7; analyzing the themes, diving into the implications of the plot, and telling genuine, layered stories.

Instead, the engagement I get superficial. A lot of ‘likes’ here and requests there, but not much interest in deeper conversations or meaningful discussion. Mostly when I try to post something that isn't smut or fluff, it's a fucking ghost town. I guess my takes must be terrible or useless.

And then there’s the catch-22: interacting with the other side of the fandom isn't much of an option. Most probably stay away because they assume my blog is only just reader-insert shit and/or because it contains DDDNE content, with the latter especially being a source of anon hate at times. Which is a reason some content I've hidden away will never come back and why I started posting on AO3. So either way, I lose.

In a nutshell, most of my content isn’t appealing to the fandom. And for most who do like it, don't actually care about it. Oh, and with anon hate as a pretty cherry on top of this "cake". So yeah, the confirmation bias and depression don’t help. Every time I see this pattern, it's more proof that I’m wasting my energy, giving so much and getting little to nothing in return.

I’ve been sitting with this feeling for the longest, and I don’t have all the answers yet, but I know I can’t keep doing things the same way. Lately, I’ve been considering a revamp, figuring out where my energy is actually best spent and how I can create in a way that feels fulfilling again. I gotta get these words out of me, but it's been so hard.

I really missed the early days of this blog. I was so happy and pretty much posted every day, talking about the worlds beyond. Now, it's just the void I'm talking to.

And for those so quick to give me advice, at least don't say, "take a break". What the hell do you think I've been doing?

Anyway, Happy New Year.

[juceynightmare]

dating 101 (18+) part 23 - cody rhodes x reader

my masterlist

dating 101 (18+) masterlist

pairing(s): cody rhodes x fem!reader, roman reigns x fem!reader

warning(s): swearing

genre(s): college!au, slow burn, fluff, angst

|| previous part || next part ||

“what are we?” was the question that echoed in the room the second it had left y/n’s mouth. it was the late in the afternoon now, and after showering together, buying a plan b, and eating out at a nearby pho restaurant, the two of them went back to cuddling on y/n’s bed. he knew one of them was bound to ask the question sooner or later, considering the fact that the two of them had quite literally scarred each other with their initials, and the last mark cody had cut into her skin had been his first name.

cody sighed, his gaze trained on the ceiling although he could feel y/n’s gaze on him, almost as if she was begging for him to look down at where she was laying on his chest. “i don’t know.” he mumbled, feeling his heart hurt in his chest at a realization that y/n was most likely still going to go to roman. for whatever reason, the man didn’t want to bring up roman. the thought of roman had suddenly made him feel angry, and not because cody likes y/n. he figures something had to have happened during basement night, because whenever he tried to remember what happened with roman, he’d only see red. “are you still going to be with roman even though i’m the first person you see in the morning when you wake up and the last person you see before you fall asleep?” he asked, and the question had been laced with so much hurt that cody couldn’t even mask it if he tried.

god, y/n couldn’t believe austin was right.

she tore her gaze away from cody’s face, fixing her gaze on her wall as she slid her head off of his chest and into the crook of his shoulder. roman had texted and called her that morning as soon as he woke up, but y/n couldn’t bring herself to even open the text or call him back. the guilt was too much, and now it had all erupted in her face.

she’d be stupid to not recognize the hurt in cody’s voice. cody liked her, but y/n couldn’t even figure out if she was simply infatuated with roman and not actually liking him in the way she thought she did. what she did know was the fact that she was drawn to cody like a moth to a flame, and that every part of her body that was currently touching his had felt as if she had been electrified.

“you don’t even date.” she mumbled, her defense mechanism telling her to argue, argue, argue.

“you haven’t even thought of there being a possibility that maybe, just maybe, i see myself dating you.” cody angrily huffed. and despite the anger that laced his voice, he tightened his arm around her to pull her closer into his side. “i like you, y/n. and maybe i’ve liked you this whole time, i don’t know.”

that certainly wasn’t the way cody had expected to confess to y/n, although he supposes it was the perfect confession for two humans who used each other for their own needs.

“cody, you said yourself that you don��t see yourself being committed to one person.” she said, ignoring cody’s confession because she knew now that cody has liked her the entire time. when she pushed herself up to sit up on her bed and face cody, she found that his gaze was already piercing through her. it was as if a dam had broken down in his gaze, and every unsaid emotion cody has been hiding from her had finally flowed over.

“god forbid that i grow up and have a different view on what i want out of life.” cody scoffed, pushing himself off the bed so he could also sit up on the mattress. “i tried, y/n. i tried to ignore my feelings for you and fuck them straight into someone else. yesterday morning, right after you had gone off to roman, i tried to literally bury my feelings in some other girl’s pussy and guess what? it didn’t work. because here i am still in your bed hoping that you’d wake up and realize that i don’t give you the ick when i kiss you, no matter how many times you say that me being a frat boy gym rat is an ick in itself.”

y/n stared at cody, eyes wide and her heart falling in her chest. here, her best friend was pouring his heart out for her in the most cody way possible.

“i like you, y/n. you’re my favorite person in this entire world, and if this doesn’t prove how much of myself i’m willing to give to you-” cody grabbed her hand and lifted his shirt, pressing the palm of her hand over the cut she had made into his stomach. “then i don’t know what will. i’m not good at this relationship shit. i’ve never had a girlfriend, and i’ve certainly never felt this way about someone.”

y/n gulped, her fingers brushing over the cut gently. she stared down at her lap, breaking the eye contact with cody and feeling her brain began to pound against her skull. her heart had felt full in her chest after his confession, and the cuts of cody’s initials on her hip and his name on her back had began to burn and itch, as if to remind her that she had asked him to carve himself into her.

she thought about the way she’s been acting around cody. the way she’d literally run to him after feeling disgusted about kissing roman. the way her body had literally wanted to claw at itself after realizing that she had made out with randy and not cody. the way cody had made himself a permanent fixture in her college life. the way that cody was the one who lured her out of her shell and made her realize that if it weren’t for them, she’d most definitely be hating her college life right now.

she had also learned that despite the fact that cody had always sounded like he’d be an emotionless asshole considering the trail of broken hearts he left behind, cody was the same man who’d tie her hair up every morning, hold her hand so she didn’t get lost in the crowd, and make sure that she felt safe at all hours of the day. he’d literally flip the world on its axis just to make sure y/n didn’t have a shit college experience and that she’d only have happy memories here.

“i’m not good at relationships either, i’ve never had a boyfriend.” she mumbled in response, finally looking up to meet cody’s gaze. “i don’t know if what i feel for you is more than platonic.” she admitted softly, and her heart threatened to jump out of her chest at the way she could visibly see cody’s heart break. “but i do know that i like being around you, being taken care of by you, kissing you and getting fucked by you. you’re my favorite person and…” her voice trailed off, and suddenly y/n felt embarrassed. she leaned forward, her head turned downwards and she rested her forehead against cody’s shoulder. “i know that i don’t feel fireworks that tingle all the way down to the ends of my fingers and toes when someone hugs me that isn’t you and i hate kissing someone who isn’t  you.”

cody would settle for that answer for now, and he wrapped his arms around the girl. he let out a breath he didn’t know he was holding in, and he felt his heart pump slowly in his chest. “so what now? you know i like you and see myself being committed to just you. you don’t know how you feel for me, but it sounds like you don’t want me to stay away.” he asked, closing his eyes and burying his face in the girl’s hair.

“let me figure things out, i guess.” she mumbled, wrapping her arms around cody’s midsection and moving so that she could straddle his lap. “i don’t want you to stop how you’ve already been acting around me, but i think it’s best we don’t kiss or fuck for a while. not until i figure out what i want.” she said.

cody nodded his head, not trusting his own words as he pulled his face out of her hair. he brought his hand up to the back of her neck, squeezing it gently as if to tell her to look up at him. when she pulled her head away to look at him, cody felt as though he could read her thoughts when he looked into her eyes. he could feel the way her thoughts were running a thousand miles an hour, and cody knew what her first step was to figuring out her own emotions. “you’re going to talk to roman, aren’t you?” he asked, watching the way shock quickly took over her features. he flattened out her hair, leaning in as if he were going to kiss her, but quickly dipped his head and pressed a kiss where her neck and shoulder met. “go. i’m getting angry at the thought of you being with roman for reasons that i know isn’t just because of my jealousy.” he laughed, lifting his head and seeing the uncertainty in y/n’s eyes.

“will you be okay if i go talk to him?” y/n asked, bringing her hand up to cup cody’s cheek.

he smiled at her, a half-assed smile that hurt y/n where it really mattered. “if it helps you figure out what you want, then yes, i’ll be more than okay.” he assured her. he bucked his hips up, as if to tell her to get off of his lap and leave. “text ted if you’ll be joining us for dinner. he should be back soon.”

it hadn’t gone over her head that cody had told her to text ted instead of him, but she didn’t push it. everything had blown up so quickly and y/n needed to figure things out now - midterms were starting the very next day and she didn’t need to have this on her mind when she should be worrying about her upcoming exams.

she pushed herself off of cody, stopping herself from leaning in and pecking his lips despite how much her body and heart were yelling at her to ease his pain. she walked over to her desk where both of their phones were resting, picking up her phone and texting roman.

[y/n] can i come over? we need to talk.

she watched as his read receipt showed up almost immediately. what caught her eye was the fact that cody’s phone had lit up with roman’s contact calling him, and she turned to look at cody.

“who is it?” he asked as he got out of bed.

“why did roman call you after reading my text?” she asked, pulling cody’s phone off of the charger and handing cody his phone once he stood beside her.

he stared down at roman’s contact, his eyebrows furrowing together in confusion as he watched the call eventually drop because he let it ring for too long. “no idea.” he mumbled, looking over at y/n’s phone and reading her text with roman. “you didn’t text him anything about me either, so really there’s no reason why he should call me.”

cody unlocked his phone and pulled up his and roman’s text message, about to call the man back before a text from roman popped up.

[roman] she’s texting me talking about suddenly “needing to talk”

[roman] i’ll kill you, rhodes. i know you told her.

he turned his phone off after he read the texts, and before y/n could see it. he cleared his throat, wondering what happened the previous night because seeing roman’s text had ignited something in him. “he text you yet?” he asked her, shoving his phone into his pocket.

“yeah he did. apparently he’s already here in the building talking to a friend of his so he’s coming up.” she hummed, looking up at cody. “you should probably…” her voice trailed off.

cody nodded his head, wondering if it would be okay for him to reach out for a hug. he didn’t like the thought of roman being in the room with y/n alone, considering the threat roman had just texted cody. he settled for patting her head and telling her, “call me or knock on my door if you need me, okay?”

she nodded her head and it took cody a moment for him to actually get moving, feeling as though his feet were glued to the floor. reluctantly, cody made his way out of the room, the only sound as he left being the sound of his keys.

just as he left, roman was already outside of y/n’s door. instead of greeting cody when they crossed paths, roman simply bumped shoulders with cody, and cody returned roman’s fiery glare as the two stood side by side facing opposite directions. for whatever reason, seeing roman now had cody wishing he could raise a fist and slam it into roman’s jaw as hard as he possibly could. but why? because cody wanted to make a statement that he’s better than roman? no, even cody knew that picking a fight with his love rival wouldn’t make him win the girl. so why did cody feel as though he wanted to strangle roman, and why did roman share that same hostility? did cody spill his feelings for y/n during basement night and roman remembered? was roman’s threat because he told cody not to confess to y/n because it’d ruin his chances with her?

every scenario was running through cody’s head, but instead of pressing further, he simply bumped shoulders with roman again, harder than roman had pushed his shoulder against his, and walked past him to walk into his room. cody was going to do everything he could to remember what the fuck happened that night.

y/n watched from inside her room, her eyes wide at the hostility that had occurred outside of her room. eventually though, roman realized that y/n’s door was wide open and she had seen the entire interaction.

roman sighed, thinking of lies to make up to get out of this situation while still saving his 500 dollar bet as he stepped foot inside the room and shut the door behind him.

“look, whatever cody said, it’s a lie, okay? i don’t even know who she is. cody’s trying to spread rumors about me because he’s jealous of us and-” roman began, only to be cut off by a very confused y/n.

“what’s a lie? who is this ‘she’ you’re referring to?” y/n asked, crossing her arms over her chest and raising a brow at roman’s words.

roman couldn’t think of a lie quick enough that’d get himself out of this deeper hole he had dug himself into.

|| next part ||

[quiet-in-the-wild]

As I’m opening myself up to this journey.

I’m realizing how small I’ve made my world. And how hard it seems to open it up- because of co-dependency.

For the past 3 years my world has for the most part been in 2 rooms in a 530 sq foot apartment. The bedroom and the living room/kitchen/my wife’s office. I can sit on the bed, or I can sit on the couch at it’s closest point it is 3 inches away from my wife’s desk.

Not having a job or someplace to go outside of the house - besides walking my dog around the apartment complex. Means I’ve had to spend a lot of time online as escapism. When I was working as a coach- that was great I could talk to people all week. After I left that business- my world got even smaller

I know my wife struggles a lot with me being away from her. Often even me being in the bedroom is too much & I can really only go there if she is on a work call & then some comes in the room immediately after & jokingly says something about me abandoning her. I’m bad at reading sarcasm & jokes- so I don’t know if it’s true or not. I tend to think that all sarcasm is actually just truth someone is afraid to express.

I feel so selfish - but as wonderful as it is to spend literally 24/7 with my best friend- it’s been difficult. I need space and privacy to write/draw. I need quiet otherwise I can’t think. And she needs constant interaction, body doubling & constant background noise. And for some reason every time I start to actually work- is when she needs the most attention. We could spend hours on our phones saying nothing to each other - but as soon as I start to type or draw she has so much to tell me & wants to do stuff.

And it’s not like I can go anywhere- I need to watch our dog- she can’t while she’s working & he is absolutely distraught without me & I would need her to drive me somewhere & pick me up- because I can’t drive & we live in the suburbs (not walking friendly)

And she has been the single earner for our family- so her needs have been the priority. And I’ve used them as an excuse to continue to keep my world small

I joined a creative group & I feel so guilty carving out 2 hours of my time once a week to be in the bedroom. I fact I’ve missed 3 out of the 5 ones I’ve been invited to. I spend so many nights awake until 1 am just to have some alone time & I’m not working I’m too tired to create. It’s way too late for me. My creative flow time is usually like 5 - 9 pm but that’s our hangout time for when she decompressed from work & wants to have fun.

My problem is- I don’t know how to open myself up to this expansion if I’m in this tiny box with so many restrictions.

And because it’s co-dependency. I feel awful. I feel like needing space is the cruelest thing I can do. I don’t even know how to get space- every way I can think there is a reason why it won’t work. And being so close and so small has made me scared to branch out.

My reading was about deferred dreams. And I can see that staying confined here is deferring my dreams. But I don’t know how to expand so I can reach for my dreams without actively hurting my wife.

[loserscanwritetoo]

Starman

Chapter 3

TW: Description of a panic attack, mention of past su1cid3 attempt

Nico wouldn’t say that he was a pessimist, but after the awkward run-in with SunBoy last night he would be lying if he said he didn’t run back home and barged into Hazel's room.

The past day had been alright. Turns out Hazel wasn’t a bitch, just an introvert who quite literally had no idea what to do with a big brother, and honestly, Nico wasn’t sure how to behave now either. He knew, realistically, that they would never have a ‘normal’ sibling relationship, but he still hoped, somewhere deep down, that they might become somewhat normal over town. 

Hazel was nice, and Nico liked most of her friends. Frank wasn’t too bad either. Apparently he was just shy with a resting bitch face. 

However kind her friends may be, Nico knew that he would never feel safe with them. You know when you meet a new person, and you badly want you to click, but something is just a little bit off? That’s how Nico felt with Hazel's friends, but it would work. He really just needed to get through two years, and then he’d graduate and be able to move back home, and go back to his solitude. That was a safe plan, and he’d stick to it. He wasn't going to let some half sister get between him and his goal, and he definitely wouldn’t let a guy ruin it for him.

He’d let guys ruin things for him since even before he realized he was gay. There was the italian guy in the playground in preschool, the mysterious foodie in middle school, and numerous other crushes that he had promised never to tell anyone about. Well, he’d told Bianca, but that didn’t count. He’d told Bianca everything.

He never ended up telling his mom though. She had a tendency to be a bit old fashioned, and Nico didn’t want to risk losing her. He had planned to tell her once he had moved out, but that was before the accident. 

Sometimes he found himself talking out loud, as if his family was still with him. Sometimes he cried, because he wished it would’ve been him and not them. Bianca was a genius, both academically and socially. Nico had always just been her weird little brother, who cut his own hair because he hated hairdressers, and only wore clothes a size too big, because he didn't want anyone to look at him. She had a bigger reason to live. Nico was just… kind of there. Didn't do much, didn't say much, and didn’t make much of an impression on anyone.

That’s why he had been so uncomfortable when he saw that Will was watching him in the graveyard. That was Nico at his most vulnerable, and Will had forced himself into his bubble. 

“You will not believe what just happened!” He thumped down on Hazel's bed, realizing a little too late that Hazel was in the middle of a facetime call with Annabeth.

“Good evening to you too Nico” she replied with a sigh. It looked like Annabeth was about to say something, but Nico interrupted her.

“Not now Annabeth, this is a missing-fathers-only conversation”. Annabeth opened her mouth, probably to protest, but Nico leaned over Hazel and hung up the phone.

“Nico, I swear to god, if this is not super important I will kill you. We were busy talking”

“Yeah, yeah, Luke’s an asshole, I’ve heard” Hazel glared at him, but Nico just rolled his eyes. He’d had enough of hearing about Luke, especially when no one seemed to want to tell him what he had actually done that was so bad. 

“So I was in the graveyard-”

“No normal person hangs out in the graveyard.” Hazel interrupted.

“Shut up. As I was saying, I was in the graveyard,” He felt his breathing speed up and his limbs starting to vibrate. “And I’m talking to Bianca and mom” He felt like a weight was put over his chest “and then all of a sudden Will fucking Solace is there and he’s watching me, and probably thinking I’m crazy, and I really don’t want him thinking that because I’m not crazy, or am I?” He tried to form more words, but his mouth was so dry, and it was like all of a sudden no words made sense, and he couldn't form sentences, he felt like his head was being dunked underwater, and Hazel seemed to seep further and further away.

He could see her opening her mouth, watched her talk, but he couldn’t hear her, and then she was gone and he was left alone in her room. It seemed to shrink more and more as every second ticked by, and he was afraid it would kill him, crush him down into a fine powder, and then finally he would join mom and Bianca again, and he wouldn't be so alone.

He was so alone. So very alone. It was just him against the world.

He felt a lump form in his stomach, and before he had time to react he threw up all over Hazel’s floor. He was startled by the sound of a door slamming open, and he felt someone hold him, talking to him in a soothing voice, but he couldn't hear the words. Then a hand was pressed against his chest, and he noticed it wasn't moving. He wasn’t breathing. How do you even breathe?

The hand moved up into the air, and then down again, over and over again, until Nico realized his chest was supposed to follow it, and it did.

Slowly he seemed to come back to reality, and he realized he was sobbing. Hazel was holding him, and handed him a glass of water. She clearly didn’t know how to handle this, and Nico’s heart sank. He had just come crashing into her life, and now here she was, sitting on her floor, surrounded by his vomit, trying to comfort someone she’d known for less than a day. He realized she was speaking, but her voice was laced in concern.

“Hey, I’ve got you. I’m here.” Nico tried to answer, but no words came out, so he just leaned into her touch and cried. Cried for the first time since the funeral. Felt all of the feelings he had done his best to ignore for months.

He cried out of anger. Anger for that drunk driver who had separated him from his family. 

Out of sadness, because he would never see his mom or Bianca ever again.

And out of embarrassment, because Hazel saw him like this. No one was supposed to see him like this. Not even Bianca had seen him like this. God, how he missed her. He would do anything to be with her again.

Hazel grabbed his hand, and he realized he'd been stroking the ugly, horizontal scars on his wrists. Now she was crying too. He had ruined everything, and he just wanted to sink into the ground.

Those scars were his biggest shame. He had been drunk, and angry, and sad, and willing to do anything to be with his family again. He had sworn never to do anything like it ever again

“I’m sorry,” he muttered. “I’m so fucking sorry” Hazel tried her best to steady herself before replying with a shaky breath,

“Don’t apologize for feeling things. How can I help you?”

“You can’t”

“Let me in, Nico. You don't have to be alone in this.”

And so Nico talked, and he didn't stop until the early hours of the morning. When the siblings finally fell asleep, holding each other, Nico felt a little lighter. Hazel was good. He was going to give this a chance.

⋆⁺₊⋆ ☾⋆⁺₊⋆ 𖤓 ⋆⁺₊⋆ ☾⋆⁺₊⋆

Hazel's alarm went off at 6 am, and Nico rubbed his eyes desperately. It was so early, and he felt like he had only slept for a minute or two. Next to him, Hazel groaned, before falling out of her bed, letting out a little yell. Nico couldn't stop himself from laughing, and Hazel glared at him before kicking him out of her room to get dressed.

Nico took a quick shower and found some clean-ish clothes in a moving box that he had never bothered to unpack. It still smelled of his home back in Italy, and he took a minute to breathe it in before downstairs where she was met by Hazel and Marie. 

He grabbed a sandwich and got into his car. It was a crappy RV, that barely even ran anymore, but he had bought it with his first paycheck, and he loved it. 

Since it was his, nobody could stop him from smoking in it, so naturally, he lit a cigarette. Hazel joined him and they sat in silence as Nico finished his smoke. When he had put it out, he glanced at her, considering telling her his biggest secret.

“Don’t you even dare apologize for last night”

“I wasn’t going to! It’s just, I want to tell you something,” She raised an eyebrow at him.

“I’m gay.” Hazel hesitated for a second before replying

“Cool. Are you gonna make sure we get to school on time?” She smiled at him, and Nico mirrored her response before rushing off in a speed that definitely wasn’t legal, but he didn't care. He had a sister. He wasn’t alone. She might not be Bianca, but right now, Hazel felt just as safe.

[pussyterminator88]

How drugs affect your personality

Have you ever thought about how you act while being on a substance.

What I mean is, do u know how you are being perceived by others when you are saying the things you are saying or doing. Do the words from your mouth come out worse then what they actually sound in your mind and same goes with your actions ?

Idk I’ve been thinking about this a lot lately and it’s low-key sending me into a spiral. Sometimes I feel like I can talk a little bit too much about myself which can make me look entitled….maybe? This is just speculation and an observation, but when you are in a different state of mind your self perception kind of goes out the window. And maybe sometimes it can come off as I only care about what I have to say and the world just revolves around me, my life, people I know and my experiences.

However I think that instead of being so hard on myself and thinking that way, I should see it in a more positive light. Like for example, instead of painting myself as an entitled self-centered bitch in my head, I should maybe think about a different reason, of why I talk so much about anything, to everything, to nothing, to me, to others. Because after all not everything is black or white. I don’t like to make everything about me and shit you know. That’s why I just can’t be a self centered individual. I think that I just like to share things with people that I find interesting and create a conversation around that. Not a conversation about me! which is the reason why I don’t try to make things about myself.

I like to share my interest, and have an open discussion about anything and if I have an experience that is relevant to the conversation I might as well bring it up. It makes sense right? But here is the catch, when I’m on a substance I feel super excited about different topics and I’m eager to share my thoughts on things, and I can become so eager that I talk over people and not letting them finish their sentence, but I truly know that this isn’t coming from a place of hatred and selfishness but it’s coming from a place of pure joy and passion for the conversation. For the other person this could be super annoying and seem like I’m rude and that I don’t care about their words. But I truly do care. I just need to learn to let people say what they want to say and then add my thing when the other person or people are done. However I also have a feeling it could be more than just passion and eagerness that makes me so amped and overly hyped over literally the most irrelevant thing.

I think I speak about my life because I want people to be able to feel comfortable with sharing things about their life. To create a space where people can relate to one another and express their feelings about certain things. Not in a sense where I trauma dump and expect the same from others but just create a vibe that’s not toxic an aura that is fun yet interesting.

Maybe this doesn’t make any sense to you, and maybe you truly don’t care about this shit (which is a feeling I get quite often when I’m done speaking with someone.) So, maybe I just overdramatize this whole self image thing and how I’m perceived, and really what I need to realize is that no one really gives as much fucks about the things you say or do afterwards as much as yourself. Because we are all the same in a way, and we all are probably not thinking about what the other person really meant when he/she said those things we just see them as what they are and how they were presented. Not overthinking about this stupid idea of what the real meaning behind those words are. Just because I share something about my life it doesn’t mean that I’m secretly a narcissist, because I know that I’m not bragging, I know I’m not flexing, I’m creating a bond.

and what I know now is that I’m just trying to open as many doors to as many conversations as possible and in this case the habit I need to learn is. These people are not going anywhere and I can wait with my parts or if I don’t understand the context of what others are talking about instead of cutting them of and asking what the conversation is about I should just listen try to figure it out and when it’s reached it’s end and I still don’t get it then allow myself to ask.

[starjxsung]

hai bb <3 ive missed youuu! i hope you’re doing so well.

i’m glad you received a lot of support from the neighborhood and that you raised awareness as well. it’s heartbreaking that these things happen and people get away with them more often than not </3

i’ve been bed rotting a lot lately. this semester was so stressful that i gained like 30 pounds bc ✨stress eating✨and i have not been able to lose them bc ✨pcos✨ (oh the things we have to go through as women </3). and i can’t handle looking in a mirror or thinking about outfits for lolla or lolla in general (only minho falling in love with me will break the curse😪) but i manage it through rewatching comfort shows and reading feminist literature that discourages my perfectionist needs.

i’ve never rewatched kingdom entirely soooo new bedrotting material👀 thanks!

rhodes island kitten sent me!! he/she’s doing so well but the mom is ever so protective and won’t even let me touch him/her anymore😪 (she only likes men)

the kitten interview is my new comfort skz content is2g. i love seeing non-cat parents handle kittens. it’s hilarious. everyone struggling and lee know just like “yeah i live like this”. channie was so good with them too! petition for cat dad! chan fr. and the claws!! my cats used to do that so much and at that age they don’t really have too much control of them so it is not for the faint of heart. i felt for them 😂

i haven’t preordered the album yet😪 and probs won’t order it until after lolla bc i have no self control either and kinda went off with my spending on baby stuff for my nephew (who’s due in a month btw such excitement! much scary!) and ateez comeback (kpop doesn’t help my finances).

i looooove your junhan pc aesthetic! i didn’t know you liked xdh🥹🥹 im waiting for my album to arrive bc i preordered it with some other things that weren’t in stock but it just shipped out🥹 i shall update on my pulls✨

take care bb! i love youuuu🫶🏻 i hope you have the best week ever!

MY ANGELLLLLLLL 🫶👼💘❤️💞 it’s so good to chat with you on here again I’ve missed you so so dearly

THE BEDROTTING…. IS SO REAL………… last week I genuinely woke up at 6pm and I thought I just napped or something for a good minute bc I was like there is no way I just slept the entire day away. There was in fact a way bc it was literally just 6pm and I lost my entire Saturday 😍 this bedrot slay

NAURRRR not the kitten who only likes men !!!!???.?.?.?.?.?..? PLSSSS my cat at my parents’ place is so particular to men for some reason and I’m like. GIRL. STAND UP. GET UP. Luckily Momo hates everyone so she’s kind of feminist in the “I only fw my mother” kind of way. Also side note she has so many fans in my apartment complex now and there’s a family with kids who look for her every day to take pics of her in my window 😭😭 she naps in my window all day long when I leave it open while I’m working so the whole neighborhood just ADORES her lol it’s the cutest thing everrrrrr

The amount of times I’ve watched the skz kitten interview. oh my fucking god. Jisung’s little “say something to the world” HWLELPPPDLDKKFDJ I genuinely cannot pick who’s more cutie between them 😭 Chan never struck me as a cat person but in hindsight he gets along with everyone and everything so. makes sense 🫶😭 and Minho is just Minho ofc

IM NGL I only preordered to get a signed album and it wasn’t until after I checked out that I realized I bought the regular ones and then the signed ones sold out 😀 I was like. Oh. Oh! Ok. My wallet is CRYINGGGGG but at least it’s preordered???? LMAO 💔💔💔

I bought my first xdh album a few weeks ago and I’ve been dragging my jh pcs around like a ghost child with their haunted victorian doll oh my god I am OBSESSEDDDD WITH HIM 🤞I also got so many xdh posters with it for some reason so I finally caved and hung all my big ass pob posters in my room and it fully looks like a kpop store in here now LMAO 🚶‍♀️YES update all your pulls !!!!!!!!! I’m so excited 👼

ALSO THE SKZ MEME PLEEAAKKXKXKDKEK SOOOO FUCKING REAL the way my sister texted me the shinee version of that meme this morning 😭😭 I love you bb I hope you have the best week !!!!!!!!!!!! 💓💓💓💓🫶🫶🫶

[tripthelightfandomtastic]

I had my first GVF smutty dream last night (and it was about Sam which I didn’t expect cause I’ve been on quite the Danny kick lately but I’m not complaining) and boy was it something so I figured I’d recall it the best I could for this Wild Wednesday!

We’d only been on a few dates so far but after dinner one night he invited me back to his place for drinks and a movie and to meet the pupper which is the main reason I agreed to go honestly. But we get back and start drinking and watching the movie and cuddling on the couch with Rosie who was a lil skeptical about another woman in her space at first. Part way through he went to top off our stick drinks and after he comes back with the refills he told me I looked so cute with my cheeks all red from the wine and the moonlight streaming in the window.

We started making out on the couch after that declaration and figuring out some things that make the other tick and almost dry humping and feeling each other up until the credits came up on the movie a while later and brought us back to reality. He then heard Rosie scratch at the back door and went to go let her out for a final potty break. When he came back in he asked “I hope this isn’t too forward, but it’s kinda late and we’ve been drinking so would you want to stay over and continue the fun? I could also just call you an Uber if you’d rather go back to your place?”

I said, “I’d love to as long as you have a spare toothbrush cause I wasn’t prepared for this at all.” He said he had some and gave me another quick kiss before telling me to head to his room and that he’d be there in a sec after cleaning up the glasses. I headed to the room he told me was his and laid down in bed after stripping off my top and I started to work on my skinny jeans when he came in and shut the door, already working the last few buttons of his shirt open and tossing it aside before coming over to help tug my pants off. I sat up to help him with his belt and pants in return while he reached over to unhook my bra and once I had managed to pull his pants and boxers down enough I took a second to marvel at his size (which in dream-land was definitely bigger than the two other guys I’ve slept with before) before licking a strip up the length of the underside of him.

I scooted back to lay down against the pillows and waited for him to strip down fully and join me while I kicked my panties off in the process too. He positioned himself between my legs and resumed the grinding from earlier but now without any obstructive layers and his mouth could roam freely over my tits. Eventually, he got the hint that I was ready after trying to position my hips enough that he could maybe just slip right in, and between kisses to my neck he mumbled “ya think you're ready for me to fuck you babe?” And I told him I definitely was as he got himself all lined up and started to push in. Despite being super turned on and in the mood I was having a bad bout of dryness down there which I hadn’t realized yet and since he’s bigger anyway it was a real struggle for him to get in and he could notice my grimacing face twisted up in discomfort. He asked if I was alright and I responded by asking if he had any lube around, to which he said “no. Is that a problem?”

“I was hoping not but I guess I was wrong” I said before he pulled out and sat back on his heels. I explained that my birth control sometimes causes me to have literal dry spells down there and when it happens lube is the only thing to make it any sort of pleasurable for me and I wasn't expecting the hookup so I didn’t come prepared in case it happened. He felt bad and said he’d make sure to have some on hand for the future. He also said that sex is off the table since it made me uncomfortable which was sweet that he was all considerate of my feelings like that, but he still wanted to try and make me feel good since I told him I was still mentally very much in the mood.

I told him he didn’t have to but he insisted and told me to just lay back and relax and that he’d take care of me before stepping down to the side of the bed and pulling my legs over his shoulders so I was right at level with his face. He went to town exploring me with his mouth and as good as it was I still needed something else so I grabbed his hair to pull him away and told him I needed more. He asked what I needed and I said I wanted his fingers, but he still wanted to check and make sure I’d be ok. He started with just his middle finger and sucked it into his mouth to get good and wet before working it in which made me groan embarrassingly loud at the sight of it. He eventually worked a second in as well and I was falling over the edge pretty soon after. Once I had caught my breath he helped me sit up at the side of the bed before he retreated to the bathroom to find the spare toothbrush. Once he came back with it I asked him if he wanted me to repay the favor, but he assured me that he just wanted me to feel good and relax and that he still thoroughly enjoyed himself during it all anyway. I got up to brush my teeth and I could hear him rummaging around in his dresser and he had a cozy t-shirt in hand for me to sleep in when I came out of the bathroom. Once we both redressed ourselves, he hopped in bed and patted the spot next to him in bed so we could cuddle for the night.

It was just very sweet and adorable and respectful of something that happens to me sometimes that I get self-conscious about easily but this was fantastic.

A sweet sexy Sammy would be so nice rn, I wish i had that kinda dream, that was very hot and very cute.

[sistrrrenchantress]

6 Questions Tag Game

Thanks @dwellerinroots for the tag! I haven’t actually ever done one of these so here goes nothing.

1. Last Song?

Ughgh I think Malibu by Hole. I last listened to a podcast and I only use Spotify so I’m like 98% it was Malibu. Anyways I love that song. It’s hopeful and sad and when I was in high school I really wanted someone to whisk me away and we’d go live somewhere by the beach in like a van. You know like those kinda romantic, hazy dreams of van-life before you realize that it’s not realistic.

2. Last Show?

I was gonna say The Last of Us, but actually I watched Modern Family last night. TBH my partner likes TLoU a lot more than I do, but it’s got some scenes that melt my heart a bit. Anyways Modern Family always acts like a personal pick-me-up since it’s kinda nostalgic. Plus sometimes I wish my family was more like them. It also kinda helped me realize what wasn’t healthy about my own personal relationships and know that life goes on even if your family sucks sometimes so even if it’s a mess it kinda has helped me? Idk why I’m trying to explain myself here lmao. I had a class where everyone said it was problematic and I don’t want people thinking I agree with everything in the show or whatever.

3. Currently Watching?

I just finished watching Wakanda Forever so I think it counts since I started this before it ended lmao. Anyways I thought it was okay. Not good, but not terrible. But I also think it was closer to terrible than good. It just felt confused, like it didn’t know what message or arc Shuri was supposed to have so idk idk. I’m not a movie critic so… yeah

4. Currently Reading?

I’m still reading Hyperion. I know it’s been a month, but in my defense the blues have hit me like a truck and I’ve solely been focusing on keeping my GPA. I have one more short story left, which is the Consol’s. Also, I should’ve mentioned but it’s a collection of sci-fi short stories (Canterbury Tales style) taking place eons into the future after Earth has literally imploded. It follows a group of people brought together on a pilgrimage to travel to the mysterious Time Temple on the planet of Hyperion. There’s more but I really don’t wanna spoil anything for anyone who might want to read or was already planning. Anyways the priest’s tale is my absolute favorite, because I like it’s spooky vibe and other spoiler-filled reasons. However they’re all written really well and I would recommend this to just about everyone since I think it’s just a really fun read.

5. Current Obsession?

Oof I don’t really have one because I’ve been feeling down. However Cyberpunk 2077 was it for a while, then TES again, and I’m just floating now. Anyways I’m always interested in TES, the Witcher, Dragon Age, etc. It’s just not as intense as other people though. I feel kinda boring now. Well, at least I’ve been getting back into art and blender and messing around with trying to learn my father’s language again. And I love writing and creating generally so that’s really that.

6. Unrelated Stuff I’ve Been Doing?

I already talked about this a little I guess. I’m learning Polish again and watching more shows with the dub in Spanish so I don’t lose it since I just don’t talk to my family much anymore. I’ve been messing with blender and unreal engine. I re-started this art-schedule-thing that I got from a yt video. I really want to improve my digital art. I also have like 10 billion tabs open with videos on blender and unreal so maybe I’ll post what I’m working on one day. I kinda gave up on my NaNoWriMo because I’m too moody and I don’t know what’s wrong with my executive function but we haven’t been on the same page recently. However, listening to podcasts (like Unresolved Textual Tension or You’re Wrong About and Rotten Mango) has kinda helped my mood a little. But if I’m being real here, real life kinda takes up most of my time. So school (gotta love deciding for a dual degree really late in my undergrad) and all the volunteer/internship things I have to do kinda just take up most of my life. That’s a little depressing lmao, but it is what it is.

Anyways, thanks for the tag! I don’t feel like I’m active enough to tag anyone and I’m shy so anyone who sees and wants to do it, feel free.

[mx-ryder]

Commission Sample

700 words from a 3k word commission. M/M pairing with some fun dynamics that I really enjoyed being able to explore.

Ben snorted, not quite a laugh. “I’m not going to die from scraped knuckles. The other guy got it worse, anyway.” He flexed his hand as he spoke, impressed despite himself. Angel had done a good job. His knuckles hardly even hurt any more. Still looking down at his bandaged hand, he reached for Angel again, catching the other man’s hand as he moved to step away. “That’s why I came back. I need more.”

He didn’t need to specify more of what. It was the only reason he ever came to see Angel.

One of the only reasons.

To his surprise, Angel didn’t pull away. Instead, the other man stepped closer again. His hand came to Ben’s cheek, the gentlest of touches. Ben leaned into the contact; even if it was a literal demon, it had been a long time since someone had touched him with such gentle intent.

Angel’s voice was soft when he spoke. “This is unhealthy, Benjamin.”

Ben blinked. “Unhealthy? You’re taking chunks of my real human soul, and you’re worried about my health? Just . . . give me what I came for. And I’ll get out of your hair.” Until the next time his luck swung in the wrong direction.

“You sound like an addict.”

Angel clamped his mouth shut the moment the words left, wishing them unsaid. When Ben looked up at him, he could see the hurt in his eyes. Humans displayed so much of their emotion in their faces, their body language, their voices when they spoke. Everything in Ben’s posture and expression said that Angel had hurt him, and angered him.

Angel moved away, dropping his hand, backing away from Ben.

Ben followed him, hauling himself out of his chair in a series of pained movements. “No shit I sound like an addict.” He practically whispered it, his voice coming like poison. He advanced on Angel as he spoke, still limping with every step. “I am addicted. You changed my luck, and I got everything I’ve ever wanted. Money, sex, success. And every time it goes to shit I have to crawl back here to you and beg you for another fix. Even though I know it’ll just all go to shit again eventually.”

For an instant, Angel was nearly afraid. He was centuries older than Ben, worlds more powerful, and had his two living shadows besides. But the anger, the desperation on Ben’s face, and the way the larger man loomed over him, was nearly enough. He shrank away from Ben, realizing an instant too late that he’d come up against a wall.

“Do you know what that’s like, Angel?”

Angel gasped. That might have been the first time Ben had ever said his name. And he’d said it with such disdain.

Ben continued, still advancing, pressing Angel against the wall with his looming frame. Though Ben didn’t touch him, Angel shrank further away. He couldn’t take his eyes from Ben’s face, frozen under his searing gaze.

He seemed to want an answer, so Angel whispered a soft “no.”

“Of course you don’t. Because you’re Mr. High-and-mighty Demonspawn. You hold all the power in everything you do. You get people hooked on you, and you wring every bit of humanity out of them until they–” Stopping, Ben pressed a hand to his mouth and pulled it away bloody. He’d re-opened the split in his bottom lip. “Fuck.”

The change came over him suddenly. Blinking as though waking up from a dream, he looked down at Angel where he had pressed himself as close to the wall as possible. His face twisted, expression shifting from anger to something surprisingly close to shame.

“Fuck,” he said again. “I’m–I’m sorry, I didn’t mean–”

Without quite knowing why, or that he’d intended to do it, Angel pushed forward. He curled his fingers in the front of Ben’s shirt, pulling Ben down to his level so he could kiss him.

Ben reacted with a fervor that surprised Angel. He brought one hand up to Angel’s cheek, and closed the few inches of space between them again, crushing Angel between himself and the wall. Angel tasted the coppery tang of blood on his tongue, but ignored it.

[blackshadowswriter]

*heavy breathing* OH MY FUCKING GOD HOLY SHIT THAT WAS AMAZING IM-🫨⁉️

Alright I'm going to be so loud about this so page break

First off, bestie, the fact that you not only remembered my bday but also wrote a fic??? For me??? WHEN I TELL TOU I SHRIEKED IM NOT KIDDING HOW ARE YOU SO FUCKING AMAZING AND SWEET AND THOUGHTFUL AND JUST SKDHDJAJKD IM CRYING I LOVE YOU SO MUCH GIRL THANK YOU FOR THIS YOU ARE THE BEST FRIEND ON THIS PLANET 😭🖤🖤🖤

Also pls don't apologize for being late when I'm almost a MONTH late, I swear I saw it when you posted (RAN when I got the notif), but I GOT SICK AGAIN 😭🤧 for like the second time in three weeks, and I was so miserable, and this was totally what I needed to get me excited again. And then FINALS hit me so fucking hard this year (istg they get worse every year), and I have been UNDER SIEGE fr, but today is legit my last day WHICH IS SO FUNNY BC IT'S ALSO TAYLOR'S BIRTHDAY TODAY SO IK I HAD TO COME BACK TO THIS

BUT LIKE GIRL HOW CAN YOU DOUBT THIS MASTERPIECE? I LOVE this so much I’m legit speechless, like you spent two days writing this?? FOR ME???? I am so honored like what 😭 what did I do to deserve you, you are the most amazing human ever ilysm 😍🖤🖤

like not only did you give me the cutest fluffiest fic ever but also the effort you put in with the Taylor references? ILYSM MARRY ME BESTIE 😍 I love how we both keep feeding each others obsessions and this was a fucking feast because let me tell you, I thought this was going to have references from New Years Day which is one of my favorite reputation songs but when I started reading and realized it was FULL of ALL the Taylor references I- 🤭 simultaneously have no words and am screaming inside rn

I legit pulled up a doc to write down all the references as I read and started pyscho-analyzing every single line for them, I'm going so crazy over this omggg

Also I'm so sorry if I miss any references, bestie, I'm scrawling this down and giggling like a mad woman (😉) while blowing my nose and coughing every ten seconds.

Starting off with the “once in a lifetime” it’s legit like you know how reobsessed I’ve been with Speak Now and I fucking love Timeless so much so this opening line had me legit gasping out loud like a dramatic hoe😭

“Those stupid love songs on the radio and the endless romantic stories of your friends’ dating lives, however, fueled your need for the same kind of connection only a few songwriters know how to put into words” TAYLOR KNOWS

"But deep down, you craved to find someone who wouldn’t be afraid of sticking around, someone who would never leave you because life tends to get hard." I'm not sure if this was intentional, but this right here just screams The Archer to me like it's totally giving "who could ever leave me, darling, but who could stay?" and I LOVE IT

The combination of "burning red" and "golden like daylight" PERFECT. Okay for a second I thought "burning red" was from Red and then I remembered the line in Daylight with "burning red" in it, and I'm not sure which one you mean, but I never thought about how those two songs compliment each other so well, BUT IT WORKS, so you're a genius for this one, bestie 🙌

"A love fighting for" 🤝 "tells me this love is worth the fight" AFTERGLOW I LOVE THIS

"So perhaps that is why you chose to lock yourself away and live in delusion instead." OMFG right where you left me is one of my favorite evermore songs everrr, and I love that line "did you hear about the girl who lives in delusion" SO MUCH

"Truth be told, when you’re your own worst enemy and have an inner saboteur...In an attempt to erase all the problems, you became the problem." Anti-hero babyyyy, but also LITERALLY US LMAO

"chasing ghosts that stayed long in the past" Omgg this line reminds me of "chasing shadows in the grocery line" for some reason

And "only came back to haunt the living shit out of you" I'm not sure if this is meant for Haunted, but I love that so so so much, and I'm hallucinating with a maybe fever rn so I kinda think it is

"Blood rushed to his cheeks" SO SCARLET IT WAS MAROON

"you knew that you’d somehow been enchanted to meet him" this is totally feeding my reobsession with Speak Now and I LOVE YOU FOR THAT BESTIE.

"It is possible that the song playing over the speakers in the café right before you bumped him played a part in how you perceived the interaction. You’ve never been one to believe in coincidences. Nothing is ever accidental, and neither was your meeting. It couldn’t have been." MASTERMINDDDDD I LOVE THAT SONG SMM

"Summer that year was cruel" 😎😎

"you didn’t have it in you to put a label on whatever delicate thing was starting to build" 👉 we can't make any promises now, can we, babe 😭😭

"Love is a fragile thing" IT COULD BURN OUT (no because I've always heard "thing" in the song until I checked the lyrics of I Know Places and realized it's "flame" and it blew my mind)

"He let out a grunt. Your name passed his lips. He sounded so weak" maybe I should go to bed bc I'm a little delirious, but I started giggling, "your name on my lips, tongue-tied, free rent living on my mind" and it totally doesn't fit the vibe, but this just reminds me of it 😂

When he woke up to you hovering over him, he groaned. “I’m sorry,” was all he said. “I’d understand if–” This part totally made me laugh because poor Matty, my baby just woke up from passing out and he's still apologizing, bless his heart omg 😭

"coffees over empty takeout containers" this is making me want to go back to your Is It Over Now fic and reread because girl, I'm still not over it 😍

"kissing in the rain" The Way I Loved You is one of my favorite Fearless songs omg, I'm so happy it made it into the fic

"He is the best thing that has ever happened to you." You are the best thing that's ever been mine 😭 bro I'm so in love with how in love we are with Matt, like HE DESERVES THIS LOVE

"You saw something in him from the moment you met that no one can ever take away" you're on your own kid 🥺

"taste of heaven" UNTOUCHABLEEEE 🖤

"You are sunshine, even on your worst days, and he’s midnight rain. But you love the rain. You love him." UGH THIS LINE IS EVERYTHING. Not just the Midnight Rain reference, but I love how in love these two are omg. ALSO this might be me analyzing too deeply, but like I love how you took the original lyrics where it's like "midnight rain" and "sunshine," that they're opposites and that's why they didn't work, but HERE, the rain and sunshine are them complementing each other so well and being so sickeningly sweetly in love 😭

"He took your hand and asked you to dance" Fearlesss and Matt being so sweet, I can't with him 🥰

"You want more of those nights" Ahhh New New's Day!!! I WANT YOUR MIDNIGHTSS 😍

"You want him and all the strings attached to him" THIS IS MAKING ME THINK OF INVISIBLE STRING, I LOVE THAT SOMG SMM

"You want to wear his initial on a chain around your neck, in Braille...“I know I don’t own you,” he said to you, “but I love you. And I know you. I want you to carry me close to your heart the same way I’ll always carry you close to mine.” LOSING MY MIND AT THIS, MY FAVORITE LINE FROM CALL IT WHAT YOU WANT, "not because he owns me but because he really knows me" 😍 I am OBSESSED with this line, and with Matt is so perfect omg 🥺🖤

"All the girls he loved before don’t matter because he’s got you now" Another one of the songs I'm so obsessed with, like All of The Girls YOU LOVED BEFORE is one of my favorite songs ever and it fits so well with Matt, i love this sm

"All those memories replay in sudden flashing sequences" ooo this reminds me so much of Love Story and I feel like it goes perfectly with reader and Matt like they are so fluffy, Love Story just makes such perfect sense for them bc it's so sweet omg

"Matt Murdock is kneeling on the floor before you, the glitter, confetti, and sticky champagne" MORE NEW YEAR'S DAY REFERENCES OMG, I WAS WAITING FOR THIS 🙌 also CHAMPAGNE PROBLEMS AHH 😍 wait this is so perfect bc New Year's Day and champagne problems have such similar beginnings, so mashing them together is PERFECT. Idk if I'm right, but the confetti is giving Long Live "confetti falls to the ground" but maybe I'm just hallucinating (I just finished finals, and I'm like half dead)

"You would marry him with paper rings, that much is true." I LIKE SHINY THINGS BUT I'D MARRY YOU WITH PAPER RINGS, but reader is so real for this, I would totally marry Matt NO RING AT ALL JUST GIVE ME A CHANCE MATTY PLS

"He sees right through you. You see right through him" WAIT I might be overanalyzing again (the advanced comp this year really did that to me) but this just feels SO PERFECT to me, with the reference to The Archer bc at the beginning it was that line like "who could ever leave me but who could stay" and now we've come a full circle to the "do you see right through me" and YES, them seeing through each other in the best way and it's just 🤧i'm way too emotion rn but this is so cute im gonna cry

"Even in your worst times, you were there for each other" AHHH I LOVE THE REFERENCE TO DRESS I LOVE THAT SONG WITH ALL MY HEART

"You don’t need to tell him that you would do it a million times over because he knows" OMFG IS THIS FROM ILLICIT AFFAIRS (and a little from I Think He Knows?), MY FAVORITE FOLKLORE SONG ILYSM BESTIE

"And he will never be just the stranger that you bumped into" please dont ever become a stranger whose laugh I would recognize anywhere 🥺🥺 AND THEY WON'T BE, I LOVE THIS SM

"Maybe that was your plan all along. Maybe you are the mastermind he knows that you are. None of it was accidental." AHHH MORE MASTERMIND REFERENCESSS YESSS

"And now, Matt Murdock is yours. Forever and always." PULLING MY HAIR OUT, this was so fucking sweet 😭😭

Bestie, TYSM FOR THIS. I could never have expected this tooth-rottingly fluffy masterpiece, and the TAYLOR REFERENCES, I might be going crazy rn, but the effort you put in to include all of them and for me??? Like, how tf do I have such an amazing, talented best friend??? Thank you so much for writing this for me, this is seriously one of my favorite of your Matt fics now and that's saying something bc I love ALL OF THEM. THANK YOU BESTIE, YOU'RE THE BEST BEST FRIEND IN THE WHOLE WORLD, I LOVE YOU SO MUCH 😭🥺🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤

(also I know im so late to Taylor’s birthday BUT in my defense it’s still 11 pm here so TECHNICALLY I MADE IT)

New Year's Day | Matt Murdock x Reader

Masterlist

Pairing: Matt Murdock x Reader

Summary: You recount your history with Matt and the highs and the lows of your relationship.

Warnings: Fluff, descriptive writing & lack of dialogue, mentions of blood, but this is mostly very tame

Word count: 2.5k

A/n: This One-Shot is dedicated to my bestie, @blackshadowswriter. I'm a bit late, and I'm sorry for that. It took me a bit to finish. I just want to tell you how much I love and appreciate you. I also know you love Taylor, so I thought "why not write a fic and use as many song references as possible? She's going to LOVE that!" You're my favorite person in the world and you deserve this. I love you. I'm all out of words because I'm anxious as hell about showing you this. It took me two days to finish. I wanted it to be as good as I could make it. I'm still not 100% sure, but I never am when it comes to giving gifts. I hope you like it <3 (This is also why I'm not tagging anyone else because this is a gift for my best friend and I intended it as such)

From the moment you bumped into him on the corner street of your favorite café, you knew that he was the kind of chance that would only come around once in a lifetime.

It wasn’t like you, at least not back then, to buy a stranger a coffee. And it was even less like you to give him your number afterward.

You had never been big on dating at that point in your life. You used to take things exactly the way they came to you, and dating never really seemed to fit into that narrative.

You preferred to lose yourself in your own world, a world where no one could touch or hurt you the way you’ve been hurt so many times in the past by people who claimed to care about you—people who claimed to love you, and in the process, you lost sight of the fact that there are still a handful of good people out there.

No one can blame you for thinking like that though. Your heart has been broken one too many times, and not just by broken relationships. 

Deep down, you craved to find someone capable of understanding all of you, not just the pretty parts. You almost felt pathetic for pretending you didn’t need it and still thinking that way.

But deep down, you craved to find someone who wouldn’t be afraid of sticking around, someone who would never leave you because life tends to get hard.

It seemed nearly impossible to find a person like that without breaking your own heart, so you decided to retreat into your shell. Better to keep your heart safe and protected than put yourself out there and be broken all over again, right?

Those stupid love songs on the radio and the endless romantic stories of your friends’ dating lives, however, fueled your need for the same kind of connection only a few songwriters know how to put into words.

You wanted to fall in love, find the right person, and heal. You wanted to figure out why love wasn’t like the burning red of sex and passion but golden, like daylight. A love living for. A love fighting for.

You felt so stupid, secretly pining for an innocent childhood dream that eventually got crushed after years of heartbreak, but that is what happens when someone becomes chronically lonely. You turned to daydreaming because at least in your head, your life could be perfect. Not just good, not just livable, but filled with love and happiness.

Truth be told, when you’re your own worst enemy and have an inner saboteur set out to destroy everything that could be remotely good for you because you truly believe you don’t deserve it, it’s hard to allow yourself to be open. So perhaps that is why you chose to lock yourself away and live in delusion instead. Not facing reality became standard procedure in your way of life.

You tried blaming it on your past, your broken relationships, and disappointments, and while that played a big part in your trauma, you also slowly started to realize that you might have been hurting yourself so you wouldn’t have to open up ever again.

In an attempt to erase all the problems, you became the problem. You became your worst enemy, someone chasing ghosts that stayed long in the past and only came back to haunt the living shit out of you. But that’s a survivable condition. 

You tried therapy, you tried turning your life around and starting anew, and while that helped you find a job you love, find a nice group of friends, and make peace with what’s been broken, nothing else seemed to change. 

You had barely started putting yourself back together again when you bumped into him. You were late for a meeting, so your focus was on your phone instead of the street before you.

It was your fault. He was just trying to make his way over the sidewalk, his cane tapping in a steady rhythm to make his way forward, and you stepped right in the middle of it. 

You remember him grabbing your arm, catching you before you could fall. He wasn’t even irritated. When you looked up in shame, seeing the red glasses and the came, you begged for the floor to open up and swallow you whole. 

“I’m so sorry,” you said. “I wasn’t looking. Are you okay?”

But before you could go on a rant about your stupidity, he cut you off, and in the silkiest voice possible, he said, “I’m fine. Don’t worry about it. Are you?” 

“What?”

“Are you okay? You seem in a bit of a rush. Don’t want you to accidentally bump into a car next.” He chuckled, adjusting his glasses. Blood rushed to his cheeks. “That was a bad joke, sorry.”

You just about melted. “It’s okay,” you found yourself chuckling. “And so am I. I was too focused on my phone. That was my fault.”

“Don’t blame yourself. It happens,” he said. He was so calm about it, unlike other New Yorkers you’ve met before.

Maybe the fact that you found him extraordinarily attractive and easy to be around compelled you to ask if you could buy him a cup of coffee to make up for bumping into him, completely abandoning your plans to make it to your work meeting five minutes late.

He introduced himself as Matthew. A lawyer. Not one of those rich defense attorneys who simply do it for the money. No, he does it to help people, and you fell for him right then and there. 

Maybe it was fate, maybe it was destiny, or maybe it was just dumb luck, but that day, when you got home after work, his number in your phone and a stupidly giddy smile on your flushed face, you knew that you’d somehow been enchanted to meet him. 

You never believed in love at first sight until you bumped into Matt Murdock, but the second you did, your life flipped upside down and changed in ways you could have never predicted. 

It is possible that the song playing over the speakers in the café right before you bumped him played a part in how you perceived the interaction. You’ve never been one to believe in coincidences. Nothing is ever accidental, and neither was your meeting. It couldn’t have been. 

You found each other when you needed someone, anyone, both of you, and it stuck. Thankfully, it did. 

Summer that year was cruel with New York drowning in an excruciating heatwave. You’d been meeting up with Matt for a couple of weeks, but you didn’t have it in you to put a label on whatever delicate thing was starting to build between the two of you. You didn’t want to wrap your hand around it and accidentally shatter something you could see growing into something more in the future. 

He was unlike anyone you’d met before, and he treated you in a way that made you believe, finally, that you are worthy of love. Not just giving but receiving because Matt himself struggled to see his worth after years of being disappointed and being there for everyone but himself. 

Love is a fragile thing though, and you have never been quite good with fragile things.

After a night of drinking away your sorrows at a nearby bar, you made your way to his apartment. You took a cab, too wasted to find your way there by yourself. You remember that you were crying; you were miserable and loathing yourself for several reasons that didn’t even make sense to you then.

When you arrived there, you knocked on his door. You didn’t get an answer. Just as you started to turn around and make your way back outside, you could hear a thud from the other side of the door. Panic settled in. You didn’t even hesitate before you opened the door, which was surprisingly unlocked, and made your way into the dark interior of his apartment. 

Finding your blind, catholic not-boyfriend in a pool of his own blood, wearing a leather-clad suit with the horns of the devil had not been on your to-do list until that night. Reality hit you just as fast and knocked sobriety back into your senses as the adrenaline started to take over. 

He let out a grunt. Your name passed his lips. He sounded so weak, so fragile, and you just stood there, your heart pumping too much blood for your body to handle. 

“What the fuck?!” you said. You didn’t yell, you didn’t snap, you simply didn’t know how to process this information. 

You were well aware of the Devil of Hell’s Kitchen parading outside at night, beating up criminals and giving them a good fright—Matt did not fit the picture you had of the guy until you saw him lying there, obviously injured. 

“It’s not what it looks like,” he said hoarsely. He tried to roll over, but the pain turned out to be too severe. 

Needless to say, he passed out on you without a proper explanation, and you somehow had to use what little you could remember from first-aid to help this bleeding mess of a man. You feared that you would lose him that night, and that was when you realized that, on top of falling for him, you didn’t care who he was, you only needed him to live.

When he woke up to you hovering over him, he groaned. “I’m sorry,” was all he said. “I’d understand if–”

“Don’t talk,” you cut him off with a finger on his lips. You wouldn’t let him push you away. Not after everything you’d been through.

He tried to sit up. “I didn’t know how to tell you.”

“It’s not exactly something you lead with on a first date. I get it. What I don’t get…”

“I didn’t lie,” it was his turn to cut you off. You remember looking up at him, and you heard him out. You had to. In your mind, there is an explanation for everything, and you were once again proven right at that moment.

He bared his life story to you, how he survived through tragedies no human should ever have to face. How he turned blind, how his senses heightened, and how he lost the one person he could always count on. When his father died, something changed in Matt. He tried to go straight, to do his father proud, but he couldn’t ignore this desperate need for justice forever. He felt cursed. So, he became someone who could make a difference, and not just as a lawyer.

He expected you to walk out, but you didn’t. You saw him for who he was, and you accepted him.

“I think I’m falling for you, and it scares the hell out of me,” you blurted out that night.

He stared at you, his unfocused eyes bewildered, his lips moving soundlessly as he tried to find an answer.

Just when you thought he would break your heart after putting your trust in him, he let out a shaky sigh and he kissed you.

He wasn’t ready to say it back just yet, but he spoke to you through actions that made you feel confident in what you were growing again.

You somehow already knew back then that Matt Murdock would be the man you one day would marry and spend the rest of your life with. 

The truth is, you two have been through a lot throughout your relationship. It hasn’t always been smooth sailing, but you would be lying if you said that it wasn’t worth it. 

From the moment you met him to the countless dates, sharing coffees over empty takeout containers, kissing in the rain, Daredevil, fighting over the beautiful women in his life that almost broke you, and fighting over his desperate need to push those away who only want what is good for him because he is own worst saboteur.

It all led you down a journey that turned out to be harder than expected and not at all the love story you envisioned, but it still turned out to be the best thing that has ever happened to you. He is the best thing that has ever happened to you. 

You used to run away from happiness out of fear of getting hurt, and Matt did the same. He feared to admit it, but then he met you and he finally realized that running was of no use because you were more than ready to stick around through everything. Through every disaster and heartache—through every broken bone, you stuck around.

You saw something in him from the moment you met that no one can ever take away. You got a taste of heaven from the devil himself, and even though he was darker than the sunshine you wished for in your life, you managed to find a way to bring some light into his life. 

You are sunshine, even on your worst days, and he’s midnight rain. But you love the rain. You love him. 

Your first kiss happened in the rain. He took your hand and asked you to dance, and you did. You danced to the sound of the raindrops pattering against the asphalt beneath your feet, and it was the most beautiful thing you’ve ever seen—Matt engulfed in the soft moonlight, his hand in yours, and a big smile on his irresistible lips. 

You want more of those nights. Even the nights you’ve had to patch him up or hold him as he broke down from all the weight he often enough carries on his shoulders, you want more of those. You want all of them.

You want him and all the strings attached to him, no matter how painful because ever since he can remember, people have walked out on Matt and hurt him in ways you can only fathom. You don’t want to be that person. 

He opened up to you. He decided to be vulnerable. He stood with you through everything and fought for you when you thought you two wouldn’t last.

He gave you his best smile and his tears, and he laughed with you every night that you waited up for him to come home safely. He quickly became the moonlight to your sun—it is a different kind of light, but it is a light that sustains you nonetheless. 

You want all of his laughter and never miss it again. You want his smiles. You want his tears. You want to spend every waking second with him. You want to miss him and welcome him back home after an agonizingly long night of worrying. You want to cheer him up in court and be his lucky charm. You want to wear his initial on a chain around your neck, in Braille, because he got it for you on your birthday. 

“I know I don’t own you,” he said to you, “but I love you. And I know you. I want you to carry me close to your heart the same way I’ll always carry you close to mine.”

And his, you are. You’re no one else’s but his, and even if that sounds a bit territorial, you don’t care. You want all of it and more because it’s Matt you’re talking about, no one else. Not a stranger but the man you love so desperately it hurts sometimes.

All the girls he loved before don’t matter because he’s got you now. You forgave him more times than he probably deserved. You held on when he barely had any strength left. In return, he has shown the same kind of devotion to you time and time again. How can you ever say no to any of that when you are so in love? 

All those memories replay in sudden flashing sequences right in front of your inner eye. You love him more than anyone has ever loved him. You pulled him out of a very dark hole. You saved his life. And he saved yours. 

As he’s kneeling in front of you now, your hand in his and clutching the small, velvety box in his other, your life passes by before your eyes. Your life alone and your life together. You recount every memory in a millisecond, too shocked to even comprehend what is happening. But it is happening. 

Matt Murdock is kneeling on the floor before you, the glitter, confetti, and sticky champagne someone spilled earlier most likely leaving a stain on his good dress pants, but he remains unwavering in his decision to open that little box and show you what he’s been hiding for a while. 

It’s a diamond ring, something he probably took months to save up for. It’s small yet elegant, and it’s staring right at you. He’s taken his glasses off to try and do the same. You would marry him with paper rings, that much is true. 

Matt says your name oh-so-softly. “Will you marry me?” Four words that stop your heart and restart it at the same time. 

He sees right through you. You see right through him. Even in your worst times, you were there for each other, and now he’s asking you to spend the rest of your life with him. Together. To give him all of your days and nights and he will give you all of his in return. He is asking you the question you’ve been wondering if he would ever ask it, and he did. 

The fireworks go off in the distance, in your stomach, everywhere. The new year has rounded the corner. People are cheering and celebrating around you, but you don’t pay attention to them. 

The clock strikes midnight and with the softest smile, you say, “Yes.” You don’t need to tell him that you would do it a million times over because he knows. He knows your heartbeat, and he knows that you would never lie to him. 

He doesn’t waste time to pull you into his arms and kiss you softly, passionately, as if both of your lives depend on it. 

It’s a bit cliché, to get proposed to on New Year’s Eve. To start the new year with the man you love and a ring on your finger. But that only means that you will still be together on New Year’s Day, and all the days after that. 

Matt chose you. You chose Matt. You chose a life together that is as unpredictable as they come, but at least you have each other to hold onto. 

And he will never be just the stranger that you bumped into in front of your favorite corner café ever again. You have him now. Maybe that was your plan all along. Maybe you are the mastermind he knows that you are. None of it was accidental. 

And now, Matt Murdock is yours. Forever and always. 

[moemoemammon]

Following that "least favorite" request could we get their reactions to being to told that they're their favorite, but to not tell the other brothers so their feelings don't get hurt? Maybe because they relate to them the most or just get along really well. Thanks!

You're My Favorite! But Don't Tell the Others-

(Feat. GN!MC and the Demon Bros)

✦ ✦ ✦ ✦ ✦ ✦ ✦ ✦ ✦ ✦ ✦ ✦ ✦ ✦

Lucifer

There are no words to explain the overwhelming satisfaction ion Lucifer’s face after you tell him that. Of course, it’s only natural that he would be your favorite, all things considered.

The Avatar of Pride won’t ever forget this moment. He carefully considers your words and agrees not to tell anyone, as much as he’d love to bring it up, because he knows more than anyone what kind of chaos would ensue should the others (especially Mammon) find out.

But they can tell something’s up when the eldest has been heard humming all day. He moves about the house with even more grace than usual, and hasn’t scowled even once.

But the REAL shocker was when Mammon tried hiding a bill right as Lucifer walked in... and the eldest let him off with a warning. A WARNING! The brothers thought the Devildom must’ve frozen over, but you and he knew different.

“MC, I would like you to accompany me to Le Pluvier this afternoon, once you've finished your studies. I've already made reservations, so be sure to get ready on time. I've made sure to consider the things you might like to eat, so I'm sure you'll enjoy yourself. Don't be late." "...I'm grinning? I don't know what you're talking about."

Mammon

The gigantic grin on Mammon’s face is so bright, it could rival the sun. You’ve seriously made his day. No, his year. Actually, he’s pretty sure he could ride this high for the next millennia! There’s nothing in this world that could dampen his spirits right now! 

He feels like he just won big at the casino! Of course he’s your favorite! He WAS your first demon, and now he’s gone and claimed his rightful spot as your number one! Good luck trying to keep him from saying anything. Mammon’s gonna throw it around in everyone’s faces for as long as he can milk it.

And you thought he was clingy before, just wait till you see how he treats you after hearing that. Despite always calling you his ‘servant’ or his ‘human’, you’d  think your roles were reversed. Mammon spoils you every chance he gets, buying you clothes and trinkets, filling the spaces in your room with the things he knows you like, monopolizing you completely until nearly everything you own is a gift from him.

Your words also help soothe that jealousy of his a little. Only a little, though. It’s easier to watch you talk to other demons when he knows he’ll always be your first man.

“Didja really have to stay after class that long? I know you were talkin' to that demon that lent you a book, but you outta ask ME for stuff! Tch... you're lucky I'm in a good mood today! But I guess I don't have to worry about some low level demon like that, seein' as I'm your favorite!"

Levi

Wait wait wait....Come again? Did you seriously just say what he think you said..? That had to be a mistake! Some kind of...uh..verbal typo! Because there’s absolutely, positively, NO WAY in all of the nine layers that he could be your favorite demon. And yet you still insist that you’re telling the truth, and Levi feels like he’s died and gone to heaven. 

Red faced and stammering up a storm, Levi looks like he might die. Is it really okay for a shut-in otaku to feel this giddy? Seriously, he hasn’t felt like this since he got his hands on a signed copy of a Ruri Hana audio drama! No no, this definitely beats that!

You’ve managed to inflate his nearly nonexistent ego, and now he feels like there’s nothing he can’t do! Maybe he could even go to Majolish right now?? THAT’S how good he’s feeling!

Almost as bad as Mammon in keeping it a secret. He doesn’t tell anyone right away, but they’re suspicious when they notice how much time he’s spending out of his room. And then when he and Mammon get in another petty argument, he drops the bomb that he’s your favorite demon in the entire Devildom, and you can guess how things go from there.

“Uuuoooo...!!!!! I've decided..! Since I've got a serious stat buff, I'm going to open a booth at the next convention coming up..! I'll sell my Ruri-chan fan art and spread her influence all over the Devildom! I'd never have the guts to do it normally, but I feel like I could do anything right now! Y-you'll go too, won't you MC?"

Satan

You nearly made this man spit tea all over his book, and now he’s coughing and spluttering and trying to figure out what could’ve prompted what he’s taking as a confession. You.. do realize what you’re saying, don’t you? And you know the kind of effect your words have on him?

Satan isn’t the type that wears his heart on his sleeve, so you have to look for his subtle expressions to tell how he’s feeling. But there’s nothing subtle about the redness of his ears and how he’s begging you not to look at him right now. For the sake of his sanity, give him a minute to recoup.

When he does recover, he agrees to keep it a secret for obvious reasons. And it’s hard to tell that he’s in a good mood, other than the fact that he hasn’t tried to pull any pranks on Lucifer lately. But Asmo sees all, and literally hounds him into spilling the tea.

He tells him a lie of course, but now the other brothers are noticing just how happy he is. Satan's smiling way too much today, isn't he? And he didn't even get mad when Beel got whipped cream on his jacket! Well, not THAT mad, anyway.

"Haaah... everyone's been harassing me all day, claiming I'm smiling a lot. I'm sure I look the same as I always do, but I'll admit that I've been happy ever since you told me that this morning. Wait.. you did think I've been grinning too, do you? I have??"

Asmo

Asmo always jokes about being your favorite and announces it as if the two of you are married, but when you actually confirm that his longing for you isn’t one sided, he ends up smearing lip balm across his cheek in shock. Did you... really say that just now? He knew it all along, but hearing it like that is just...!

Ooooh, he’s so happy he can hardly contain himself! Asmo throws his arms around you, peppering your face in kisses until you feel sticky from lip balm, wipes your face clean, then marks it up all over again. Good luck getting rid of him, because he might never let go.

Immediately posts it to Devilgram. Did you really think he’d let such a momentous occasion go unannounced? You must not have been paying attention to the kind of person he is! Asmo would put you on a pedestal in front of the world like a precious jewel if he were able, but this’ll have to do. He won’t hide his love at all!

Of course, the others don’t take too kindly to it, not that he cares. He never leaves your side, pampers you like crazy, and has even attempted to get you to move into his room. Lucifer put an immediate stop to that, though. Boo...

“I just can't get enough of you, MC! Just being near you gets me so excited that I can hardly stand it! You'll take responsibility for what you're doing to me, won't you? And in exchange, I'll take my time showing you just how much I love you. After all, you're my favorite, too!"

Beel

Beel never has a problem with choking while he eats, and it comes as naturally as breathing. Unfortunately neither of that applies right now, since you just made him choke on a meatball sub.

He usually takes your words with quiet acceptance, but this might be the most emotion you've ever witness from the stoic demon. His eyes are wider than that time that laid on an entire gingerbread mansion, sparkling up with such deep emotion you wouldn't be surprised if he cried. Instead he softens up and immediately embraces you.

...And doesn't let go. Sandwich long forgotten, he's been carrying you around all day, and ignoring any questions or protests from his brothers. Also insists on feeding you throughout the day. The food tastes better when he can enjoy it with you, so why not just bring you everywhere?

When he isn't carrying you, he's following you around subconsciously, either close up against you like a protective wall, or just far enough that you're within his line of sight. As far as not telling anyone, he... tells Belphie immediately. It was an accident though, since there's not much he keeps from his twin.

"MC, I won a meal ticket for Godevil Chocolatier. Let's get something for dessert today. Ah, you can get as much as you want, too. I really want to see what things you choose. They might become my favorites."

Belphie

There's nothing in this world that can wake Belphegor from his sleep, unless he allows it. No loud noises, no amount of shaking or smacking, and not even dragging him around the house. But the moment you whisper that he's your favorite demon, the Avatar of Sloth is wide awake.

Hey, you're not just saying weird things to get a reaction, are you? Because if so, this is a new level of cruel. Yet you confirm that you mean it and swear him into secrecy, and Belphie tries his best not to show how happy he is. A smile keeps creeping up on his face that he struggles to force down. It's annoying...

As funny as it’d be to tell everyone the news, he's good at keeping secrets. Instead, you've noticed that he's been sleeping a little less that before. When he does take one of his hundreds of naps, he finds some way to be closer to you. He's even been seen sleepwalking to your exact location somehow-

It's hard for him to believe that you're not teasing, though. How could HE be your favorite demon here? Belphie doesn't do anything special to win you over, yet after everything he put you through, you like him enough to deep him your favorite?

"You're weird, MC. I mean... me? I won't deny that I'm really happy though, but I guess I'm in disbelief. You should spoil me even more until I believe you. Lend me your lap for a few hours, okay?" "...I wonder what Lucifer would think if I told him, heheh."