#i like the idea of my brain being a city
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what a joy how we have watched ourselves change and grow up.
i remember how my friends text me late at night, "i just found..." i find old pictures captioned "player one" and suddenly winter break feels lonely without them. there was a summer me and him stopped talking, and we came back different people. to me, he seemed happier. to him, "you've changed."
there are great halls in my head painted with murals of the people i love. historic monuments are dedicated to everything they have ever done for me. oil-painted birds soar the ceiling and perch on oil-painted branches, their calls bouncing off the marble dome vault. i recognize the sounds and call their names back to them as i pass. behind me i close the door on a boy who loves trees and ahead i see an empty chamber, its walls blank canvas.
my brush is light in my hand and i begin to paint my new favorite bird—a bearded vulture.
welcome to the world, atlas!
#my writing#writing#prose#poetry#is this poetry?#i like the idea of my brain being a city#or a labyrinth#and each wall is painted with my memories from different times my life#i think i've run out of room in this hall#so i'm moving on to the next one#but it's somewhat comforting that even when we change as people some things will stay the same in between#i've wanted to be an ornithologist for four years now.#through everything that's changed and moved around in my life i think that it's insane that that's still the goal i'm working towards#so i guess it's not other people changing that scares me#it's more like. i like that something in me has stayed the same when everything is shifting around me#that i can still have the same comforts and come home to the same bedroom and watch the same shows and have the same dreams#sometimes it feels like the world is moving too fast.#whoops. tags got kind of long.#anyway#first actual post excluding my intro so i guess we can consider this my debut piece?#welcome to the world!
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so i started playing persona 4
where are the QoL features
#persona#art tag#ACK I FORGOR TO COLOUR THE BITS BEHIND HAIR nvm#i have no idea how to tag this!!#i fear what original p3 might have been like#i feel like a fake gamer man#like how did you guys do that#i feel like i would have given up if it was the first one i played#i am too stupid!!#im glad i have played through 5 and 3re#i am somewhat used to the flow of the game and the ability names#otherwise i would be STRUGGLING for my LIFE i tell you#like to be fair i dont think it's a huge world#BUT LIKE PLEASE IM LOST IN MY OWN HOUSE#also these protags are basically my OCs at this point#i borrow their canon personalities#and reshape them into something i like more hehehehe#edit: im crying im getting lowkey flamed on tweeter dot com#i just meant it as in joker spent a lot of time in tokyo!! one year changes a man!!#I KNOW inaba is small!! but QoL additions are always good!!#i get the appeal!! that you use your brain!!#you spend enough time to know the place!! but it's called QoL features not NECESSARY features!!#im cryin the boys ate just bantering#you can even read it as yu being like LOL you're a city boy now huh?? hahaha#now i really am fighting for my life and mental
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Worm Arc 21 thoughts:
Well that was sure a turn around from last arc's "I'm going to rally the students so I don't get captured."
I know my daughter has made some . . . mistakes, but I'm not a fan of her turning herself into the openly corrupted and also bad at their job parahuman cops.
(Parahuman cops as in "cops who police parahumans" not "cops who are parahumans")
Like look, I get it. A precog told her to cut ties. I can't say it's wrong to follow that advice. But she could do that in a lot of ways that don't involve the PRT.
The second not from Dinah just being "I'm sorry" is brutal.
But before she can turn herself in she has to absolutely fucking crush the PRT/Protectorate for outing her civilian identity.
I love how fucking simple taking out the entire PRT headquarters was for Skitter and her girlfriends!
Who needs anyone else? Bitch brings muscle, Tattletale brings information, Skitter brings battlefield control. Lesbian polycule power activate!
Was it an overboard response? Maybe. Was it badass how she just took out so many heroes and PRT troops with ease? Yes.
Poor Dovetail has one of the most embarrassing introductions ever. First time we see her and Skitter is wiping the floor with her and thinking about her "crummy power".
God I hate Tagg so much that he makes me miss Piggot. Like she was absolutely terrible, but he's worse! And making me miss Piggot makes me hate Tagg even more!
Kindly old cemetery groundskeeper who doesn't pay much attention to the news! Never a bad trope.
They gave Butcher 15 to Cherish???!? Like sure they give all the reasoning for it but like ... it just seems like a really high risk situation. If she ever gets out it's going to suck. A lot.
THE SCENE AT RACHEL'S PLACE OH MY GOD!
SHE IS BUILDING A COMMUNITY! I LOVE HER SO MUCH!
Rachel just over here finding everyone like her and giving them a place. Legit crying. Look at that fucking growth!
(Also shout-out to my wife for having basically done the same thing. It's how I met her. It's how I met one of my girlfriends. And so many other important people. So ya. I fucking love this.)
Also you ever like a girl so much you try to give her an entire planet? Cause Taylor sure has.
"Rachel I don't want you to be sad when I'm gone so you can basically have this whole other planet we found."
GGGGGGGGGGAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!
Imp let Regent take control of her . . . welp. Like, I'm not really surprised by this. And in a different situation I wouldn't even really find it that weird. I'd do it with the right person. But combination of age and the situation they are in and Regent being Regent annnnnd ya. Welp.
I did love how much of the interactions between Skitter and Regent/Imp really was just her struggling with parenting two teenage supervillains.
IT'S NOT SO EASY, IS IT CHILD?!? MAYBE YOU'LL CUT ME SOME SLACK AND LISTEN TO MY ADVICE IN THE FUTURE!
(She won't)
I fucking LOVE that she made the bible themed hero kneel. Absolutely fucking amazing.
Oh shiiit, Skitter just flat dropped that guy multiple stories. Is she going to far?
. . . wellll, these guys do literally worship the Endbringers so I guess a little aggression is ok.
Damn, Valefor sure has some fucked up powers, I wonder what they're gonna do abou-
. . .
. . .
. . . . . .
. . . wellll, these guys do literally worship the Endbringers so I guess a little aggression is ok.
. . .
Yep.
. . .
. . . I think I preferred when she just used a knife.
So anyway
Not a fan of Taylor having more alone time with Brian (not because I have any issue with the idea, but because I think she needs to be focusing on her girlfriends), but I am a fan of her using bugs to clean her dress and fix her hair afterwords while Brian just kinda sits there and has to contemplate what he has gotten himself into. Queen shit.
Flechette was SO mad that Parian wasn't "cute" anymore, I couldn't stop laughing. Sure, she said "You had to take the playfulness away? The joy?" but we all know what she meant. Of course, it's won't take very long for the new costume to get Flechette's attention. (I have to mention that this is basically exactly what I said when reading the scene, and the interlude a few chapters later just proved me right.)
Flechette is just so hopelessly gay
Miss Militia is actually getting very mild respect from me right now. Like, she's still working for the cops but she is actually agreeing to silently push against some things. Now, she says she doesn't have more power then that but she is a very well known hero and if she would publicly speak out about certain things there is a decent chance she could do more. That would of course be putting her position at risk though. Which is why she only gets very mild respect right now.
OH MY GOD I DIDN'T JUST GET TO SEE TATTLETALE'S MURDER WALL, I GOT TO SEE HER ENTIRE MURDER ROOM!
Fucking multiple bulletin boards with threads connecting them. Everything color coded. Reference numbers to files with more details. Multiple TV screens, computer with constant information dump. God. It's like a literal representation of the inside of my mind while I read Worm. SO MANY THINGS TO FIGURE OUT!
I love a lot of characters, but Tattletale always stays near the top. She gets me.
And from the fucking joy of getting to see that setup I come crashing the fuck down.
Like, I have completely figured out at this point that Skitter is turning herself in. I know what is coming. She's had her moment with everyone else and Tattletale is the last one.
And then. Then just . .
No goodbyes.
😭😭😭😭😭
HOW DARE THIS BOOK MAKE ME FEEL MY OWN FEELINGS!! I'M TOO GAY FOR THIS!
I do find it hysterical that the PRT officers working the front lobby don't all recognize Skitter on sight. Fucking gas station employees will manage to keep track of people with pictures on the "bad check" board, you'd think the PRT could manage to have their officers keep track of the face of one of the most well know villains in the country, if not the world, who also controls their city. PRT is forever bad at their job.
That one guy did notice her eventually though, so I guess he gets to be employee of the month.
The Number Man interlude thoughts:
The inside of this mans mind is one of the sexiest things I have ever seen and the constant reminder of the horrible things he is helping Cauldron do to all their prisoners was very helpful because it was the only thing keeping me from deciding that The Number Man is a perfect soul that can do no wrong.
I have no illusions here. I am weak. This man is a monster and I should not have any trouble remembering that.
But fuck shit fuck oh god fuck I don't even need him to touch me. I just need him to TALK to me. I just need him to get high with me and let me pick apart how his mind works!
He understood numbers, and through them, he understood everything.
That line. Absolute killer. Fucking take me.
. . . anyway yes it's a very interesting interlude!
Loved seeing more of the inner workings of Cauldron
I very much want to see the final level of their basement that only the Doctor goes into because I said that I thought Cauldron had a dead (for values of dead that are non-definable) higher dimensional being in their basement back during arc 15 and now I know for sure that there is something down there. I wanna know if I was right!
Oh my god he was friends with Jack
"Friends"
Look I make everything gay ok? It's not my choice! Sure it means I get to enjoy every tiny bit of Wolfspider and Chatterbug cause I see all of it. But it also means I see the ships I don't want to think about!
I men what was I supposed to think when Jack said “We can live this. Together. Every waking second…”?
Gay
Parian interlude thoughts:
And speaking of gay!
Fucking Flechette just full blown "Fuck all of this I want you to tell me what to do for the rest of my life!"
Full U-Haul lesbian.
GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!
This is Parian's new costume having an effect.
Just so gay. I love it.
Also Bitch just so fucking ready to break Skitter out. So fucking gay.
And the incredible loyalty, which is gonna hurt if she ends up feeling betrayed by Skitter.
Still gay though.
Tattletale, basically without powers, just completely giving Accord the "fuck off, we're in charge" was amazing. All she had to do was promise to consider his binders and he was all in. This poor man just wants somebody to read his ideas! He's like a aspiring screenwriter just begging people to read his script.
#Worm#Worm Web Serial#Parahumans#Cairavende reads Worm#Skitter#Wolfspider#Chatterbug#Smugbug#Number Man#I love doll lesbian#She is one of my favorite side characters#Curious what Flechette's new name is going to be#I was cackling about the idea of Flechette crossing half the city to make a phone call cause no one has any idea how much Skitter can hear#Or how far away she can hear it#And it's just like “Well uhhh other side of the city I guess?”#Also the amount of brain power currently being used to try and come up with a clever ship name for Jack Slash and The Number Man#Is unreasonable#I don't care. I don't want to care.#I don't want to think about shipping ANYONE with Jack#I hate that pretentious little shit bag so much#And yet#The possibilities with numbers and dividing and such are endless#And I can't stop myself#Please send help#Or just send me more of The Number Man's internal thoughts#That could distract me
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As a show of good faith toward the remaining Decepticons at the beginning of a new, united Cybertron, newly appointed Senators Bumblebee and Soundwave allowed Shatter and Dropkick to enlist into Autobot City's Defense Team.
These two turned out to be... not the best choices.
The city may have fallen to Insurgent Decepticon occupation had it not been for young recruits Hot Rod and Arcee's accidental interception of Shatter's communication with the fugitive Starscream.
To replace the errant Defense Team members, Springer and Blurr were reassigned from Iacon to Autobot City in their stead.
#my art#tf reconstruction#transformers#bumblebee movie#tf shatter#tf dropkick#maccadam#transformers au#semi-introduction to my idea for antagonists in tf:r - specifically being movie villains slotted into my au#bc if the main crux of the main reconstruction story in autobot city is about hot rod and her rise to becoming rodimus prime#which comes from the First movie - why not loosely adapt other movies too??#ive got ideas for most of them already - kinda jumping back and forth between the modern day story and my pre-war ''downfall'' story#which gives my brain a break from thinking about one to think about another#anyway - i imagine the first ''episode'' of tf:r would be like. hot rod shows up in autobot city on her first day > meets the team#> gets assigned arcee as her partner > arcee hates it > they over hear shatter talking to someone they don't recognise because rod's nosey#> huh that's weird > they intercept it next time by accident > its a communication to starscream about the city's defenses#> they take it to ultra magnus but they break the pad on the way because they were arguing about it#> ''hot rod i know you're new here. and you're intrigued about the war and everything. but we shouldn't be suspicious of everyone wearing a#purple badge. give them a chance.'' > arcee drops it bc she doesn't wanna start trouble + ''magnus will handle it. he always does somehow.'#> rod does not drop it and makes blaster monitor shatter's messages for anything unusual > blaster indulges her bc he's endeared to her#> he does end up intercepting an encrypted message > rod immediately acts and chases after shatter and dropkick on an outside-city mission#> arcee goes after her to stop her from fucking up really bad > blaster unencrypts the message. it's a rendezvous point to start an invasio#> magnus kup blaster and perceptor all head out to help the two young'uns before they get in over their heads#> rod and arcee meet and fight starscream and barely make it out by the skin of the teeth thanks to the more experienced autobots arrival#> starscream shatter dropkick and whoever else is there are driven off#> day is saved - magnus commends rod's gut instincts but rod goes back to what magnus said about not trusting bots with purple badges#> she was right this time but its an exception not a rule and most other decepticons in the city want to live in peace#> magnus also commends that attitude and the team head back > starscream starts plotting his Next Big Plan#''post credits'' scene of magnus putting the request in for springer and blurr + robot dinosaur opening its eye in the dark👀👀#longwinded but ya thats like the Clearest idea for Specific Events so far other things are Stuff I Want To Happen
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what if I indulged my inner twelve year old and wrote crossover fanfiction
#it would be pjo x dc bc I’ve been reading a lot of batfam fic#I can’t stop brainstorming Tim as a demigod who encounters Grover Annabeth and Percy and just has to cope with that#tim calling Cassie: THERE ARE CRAZY PEOPLE HERE WHO SAY THEYRE DEMIGODS#Cassie: ooooh yeah. yeah I don’t run in those circles but if they say ur a demigod you should probably go with them#tim: how could you betray me like this#was Cassie also made from clay??? unfortunately I don’t know anything about Wonder Girl I’m so sorry#I want Tim to be a low-powered child of Aphrodite and when he finds out he’s just like aaa this explains why I’m so good at disguises#Gotham city has crazy levels of Mist bc it’s being patroned by Hecate#so most monsters don’t bother#also most intelligent monsters look at the batshit crazy mortals and are like. yeah we’ll stick to NY and Cali where the most demigods are#in my brain it’s actually Grover’s fault that the trio are in Gotham he wants to recruit Poison Ivy to help restore the Wild#percy and Annabeth insist on coming with to protect him and also bc they’re bored#they run into 20yo tim and grover is like DAMN how are you alive??? and Tim just has. no idea what the fuck they’re talking about#arbitrary speaks
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I think an interesting part of Yoshiki and Hikaru’s relationship is that Hikaru does all the same shit that Yoshiki always complains about, and yet, because Yoshiki idolizes him, he gives it no notice.
I mean in ch9 Yoshiki had just finished complaining about people gossiping about his family and the next line out of Hikaru’s mouth is gossip he heard about another family’s fight. Vol1’s bonus chapter shows that the real Hikaru complained about Yoshiki’s hair just as much as the rest of the village, enough so that he’d badgered Yoshiki into letting him cut his hair once before. In fact the very first chapter we see Hikaru talk about how Yoshiki always stays at home and doesn’t look for a girlfriend, which mirrors a lot of the things we hear from the brain penises in ch11.
But all these scenes are supposed to be good moments Yoshiki had with Hikaru. Yoshiki thinks of them fondly and misses hikaru more after them.
And I’m not saying that Hikaru’s the worst person in the world because he gossips and Yoshiki was blind for not seeing it, but I do think this is a pretty important part of Yoshiki’s character. After all, he does the exact same thing with the city. Yoshiki sees the city as the place he belongs, a place away from all the gossip and expectations because as we know, no one gossips or holds unreasonable societal expectations in big cities (/s). All these things that Yoshiki thinks he wants are based off ill-conceived ideas of what they’re really like because what Yoshiki really wants is for something to just make all his problems go away when nothing like that does or could ever exist. Moving to the big city doesn’t get rid of societal expectations or discrimination. Hikaru doesn’t make his home life any less shit. ‘Hikaru’ doesn’t make him miss Hikaru any less. They can help but they can never get rid of the core problem.
#Also telling that Hikaru is Yoshiki’s “slice of the city”#it all comes back to this magical idea of the “big city” being where Yoshiki really “belongs”#Hikaru ga Shinda natsu#the summer hikaru died#hgsn#my hgsn shit#edited this to add a link to my brain penis post cuz I realized I can't just be saying shit like that without context lol
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Tossing around the idea of Vat’il getting stuck in drow society between him trying to leave the Underdark and finding Bhaal’s temple
Have some loose outfit doodles- I have no idea how long he’s there for so he gets designs for his child and teenage self :>
#on one hand- him being there for a good long while could lead to lots of fun things#on the other hand it would kill the vat/orin childhood shenanigans :(#but I think that’s the way I’m leaning??#not that children have never escaped drow cities before but it’d be damn difficult#like he’d be rolling straight 20s to get out of there when he’s 10 djdjdjdj#he’d get there at roughly 8 years old#and I have no idea how long I want him to be there for (but I do think I want it to happen just cause it’d reinforce/explain some things)#like his incredibly deep hatred for Lolth#or how he became a monk#which was probably still mostly self taught on his end#it just fits nicer in my brain than him doing monk things in bhaals temple#anyways it’s messy right now djdjdjjdjd#doodle#sketch#oc#bg3#bg3 oc#bg3 durge#the dark urge#Vat’il
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i have a star wars fic idea floating around my brain that is just a time travel fic centering around bodhi rook where part of the explanation for a suddenly-force-sensitive-bodhi is "the monster tore parts of me out and maybe that made more space for the force to fill in the gaps"
#fic ideas#star wars#rogue one#bodhi rook#mark this down for fics i'll likely never write#mostly bc the star wars fandom a) intimidates the fuck out of me#and b) i'm not even that big of a star wars fan??#i'm a casual fan at best#i do love a good time travel fic though#vague premise is bodhi waking up in the past and being like ??????? i think i have to warn the jedi and maybe save the galaxy idk#and just being an anxious mess about it the entire time#and maybe running into clone wars era obi-wan or anakin idk#wanting to melt into the ground and give up the entire time but keeping going on sheer momentum at this point#why am i thinking about rogue one again#something about bodhi's character just lives rent free in my brain u know#like doing the right thing and helping and being punished for it by torture AND losing your entire people/city#and gritting your teeth and continuing to do the right thing#what higher cost can you even pay?#you've already lost yourself. you've already lost your home. what are you fighting for?#your people? you already lose them. but here's some new ones and you follow them knowing you're going to lose them too#nothing is left but to try and help a bunch of strangers you have no tie to#to try give their story a happier ending than your own#idk just like. he's a wet cat of a character but there's a steel core to it as well y'know??#just tickles me
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Your honor my client simply wanted to fuck around and find out
#mel's musings#briefly interrupting my hiatus to leave this here#context: i found a remaster of joking motive with the bw2 soundfont on youtube#and it gave me the absolutely HILARIOUS mental image of raymond shields as colress' defense lawyer#you know. because of the whole ecoterrorism thing (re: freezing an entire city just bc he was curious about kyurem's power)#cause like. there's NO WAY that didn't kill people right#there's no way there weren't some poor folks walking around the streets that got blasted w/ unbreakable ice#(oc tangent: denise nearly died in this attack and has permanent ptsd and aversion to ice/cold in general as a result)#AND YET the dude seemingly suffers no consequences for it. he's still just chilling on team plasma's ship in the postgame#which always made no sense to me because ghetsis and the sages got arrested in bw1 (even if the former escaped)#n's a different story because he was being groomed. but colress has no such excuse#either the pokemon world's justice system is REALLY lax or he had a really good lawyer#and guess what brilliant idea i just had today. i would SO be fleshing this out more if my brain wasn't still eating itself alive#↖️ this user is not normal about raymond shields ace attorney and you best believe she's going to make it everyone's problem#forest for the tree
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.
#okay no it's not the darkness getting to me there is a real life thing occupying a lot of my brain space#and idk if there's anything to be gained by speaking it out loud into the void but at the moment it's the only thing i Can do#i don't even have to click the 'post' button if i don't want to#but yeah. yesterday got the news that my mom's husband is dying. had a surprise heart attack and he's not gonna make it#just feels super fucking weird#personally i never really liked him at all so it's not like i myself necessarily have to grieve. never was that close with him#but like. oof this is going to be hard for my mom. and i'm super worried about how she's going to survive#but there's nothing to DO about it really. she wanted to have some space to come to terms with this on her own#and she has a strong support network of friends in her city. while i'm on the other side of the country#and don't even know what i could do to help if i was closer to her. i just. like. what can you even do in a situation like this?#just feels weird to Not do anything when i know how huge of an impact this will make for her entire life#she'll probably have to move to a different place too#and there are people there to help her. people with more life experience. people who probably know more about grief than i do#i just. i have no idea how one handles something like this. except for being there for her when asked#do eldest daughters have some sort of universal responsibilities that i'm just not aware of?#it feels kinda horrible how this is constantly circling back to what can *I* do and what must *I* do. how *I* feel#i'd never ever ever make things this much about me in any other setting than my own tumblr blog. in a tag whisper i'm not sure i'll post#but yeah all of this is eating my brain in a very weird way. an odd sort of limbo where it feels like there should be something here#it'd certainly be easier if i had any sort of relationship with the dead person myself. if i had something to grieve myself#now there's just a feeling that something Should be here to feel. and the knowledge of how hard this must be for my mom#ahhhhh idk none of this makes any sense i'm just speaking in circles and everything feels bad#it's bad and horrible and i don't know how to process any of this and i'm stuck in my brain and can't DO anything#there's nothing i can do to help my mom at this exact moment when she wants to be left alone with her thoughts#and i can't do anything else either because all of this feels like a heavy black cloud fogging up my brain#can't concentrate on anything at all today#not fun. not cool#sussitalk
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...
#hello to anyone who happens to b interested in the saga of my life... also maybe the irl person i gave my url to... hopefully my blog#didnt freak her out too much lol. anyway so its been a busy week? 2 weeks? month? year? life? its been a lot. my parents helped me move#across the country from the desert to somewhere that's beautiful and green. my dad is so jealous of me lol its so so so pretty and theres s#so much to do. will i do any of it? that remains to be seen but im gonna try to be better about that sort of thing. try to get some help#with the thoughts in my head that keep me from doing and enjoying most things. its weird like im decorating my new room which i love. the#location and living situation seem ideal and i really hope i can stay here all 5 years of my program but i was picking a lot of bright#colors and now it feel uncomfortable. like if i wear things that r too bright or my room is too bright without dark contrast it feel weird#like if im wearing it it kinda makes me feel sick. idk what thats abt. anyway. ill try to heal my brain and im just so happy to b out of the#southwest. i was so so so excited when we were leaving thr city and even more so when we left the state. i cant believe im here. in December#it felt like a million years away and i really truely could not fathom how i was gonna survive that long. my thoughts were so distorted. but#i did and here i am. and in like a month i should b starting my phd program and my parents were telling me how excited ppl r for me and#jealous of where im living and im glad. im glad they're excited. i think i am too but its under a layer of: if i get excited it wont happen#im not allowed to b excited or it wont happen. which is irrational but ya kno. anyway so that's yeah. im so happy to have a fresh start and#the town seems super cool. a liberal blip in a sea of... not that so theyre very visibly pride forward haha and i think itll b way easier#for me to get around without driving. and im gonna try to make friends. i need someone to tell me where to get tattoos haha. so yea im happy#but exhausted and i dont wanna go back to work and so so greatful to my parents for being wonderful ppl idk how bc both of them had fucked#up childhoods. like my mum will say the saddest shit and im like bro this is y i don't wanna talk to my grandma fuck her and my dads parents#r so fucked. like my nana is the reason im so fucking control freaked out but i kno i have issues and she has no insight and thinks shes#better than everyone. anyway hopefully i can get back to drawing a posting more now. ive been drawing it its been in a sketch book#like an actual sketch book for sketching big ideas thst r gonna take fucking forever to draw 😭#so that's all. just uprooted my whole life. thats all. but in a good way :-]#unrelated
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56 and any Yamo pairing! 🫶
i just wheezed so hard when i saw what the song was i almost snorted coffee out of my nose i am so sorry for this one
#56 - kyoto phoebe bridgers + yamo
the story of how this song ended up on my wrapped is too long so it’s going in the tags but. let me set the scene for you.
2026 NHL GLOBAL SERIES™️ JAPAN - Presented by YPPI
November 13 & 14, 2026: Dallas Stars, Montreal Canadiens, Seattle Kraken, Vancouver Canucks
Saitama Super Arena, Saitama, Japan
It’s a pitiful excuse of a consolation prize for not being able to go to the Olympics, but Kailer’s not going to look a vacation horse in the mouth. The arena’s cool. It’s huge. The people are cool. There’s so many more of them than he thought there’d be with jerseys that have his name on the back, and a lot more that have the familiar orange and blue. He takes a picture of the fifth Oilers Yamamoto jersey he signs—this one’s the good Reverse Retro—and texts it to Connor, says,
no one here has even heard of mcjesus
and gets a moon face emoji in response. Leon’s influence. Kailer’s still never really deciphered what that one means, and he doesn’t think Connor knows either.
They don’t have a lot of time off between games, but Kailer’s trying to be a good tourist. His dad had been so happy when Kailer had told him about the series that Kailer’d had to stop him from trying to book a flight a year in advance, and his mom’s been just as bad, sending him every article she sees about Best New Spot in Tokyo! Cool Restaurant! Have You Seen This Japanese Cat Café? that she scrolls across on Facebook since June. Suzy’s in the same boat, so they’ve been crossing off their compiled travel-guide list together, looping in as many guys as they can. Everyone’s been pretty game. All the teams are crammed into close quarters at the same hotel, which means everyone wants to spend as much time as possible outside of it, and it helps that Kailer’s gotten pretty close with all the other guys that the NHL picked up as Global Series figureheads. Robo’s memes? Absolutely fire. The groupchat loves them.
For every item he crosses off the list, Kailer takes a picture and keeps it tucked in his phone notes. It’s like speed-running a scavenger hunt—they’re only here for four days—but he’s doing a pretty good job. His favorite so far has been all the gardens. They’re stunning, trees shining bright red and yellow, and every vendor has been selling maple candies, maple cakes, and even fried maple, though the official maple festival doesn’t start until next week. The second garden he visits, he does it on his own after practice, buying two cakes from a cart near the gate and walking until he loses the bustle outside. It’s easy to get lost in the winding pathways, heading deeper into the quiet, and there’s dozens of benches underneath the burnished leaves where young couples are tucked away on dates, or old friends are laughing and catching up. In some of the little clearings, there’s small shrines where people leave offerings, a prayer for good luck or good fortune.
Kailer stops at one without any people and sets the second maple cake on top of it, then sits and scrolls through all the texts that he’s missed. His mom gets replied to with a picture of him outside the garden gate, grinning and surrounded by other travelers. He sends his brother a picture of a trashy graphic I Love Japan t-shirt with the threat that he’ll buy one for him, and Kailer’s dad gets a picture of the meticulously arranged and cut bonsai that are across from the bench where he’s sitting. The Seattle groupchat gets a recycled meme from Robo, and he gets two thumbs up and an “LMAO” before he can even exit the thread. Finally, Kailer takes a picture of the half-eaten maple cake in his hand, holding it next to a fallen maple leaf on the bench, and gets halfway through typing another message before he thinks better of it.
(On the plane over, Drieds was reading them a story about how when they first introduced the high-speed railway, people were afraid to use it because they thought it would be too fast for their souls to keep up.
“Bro, if that were true, you just left your soul in the middle of the Pacific,” Ebs had laughed. “Planes are faster than trains.”
“Are they?” Matty asked. “Isn’t the train in Japan the fastest in the world?”
Drieds couldn’t make it through the rest of the story over the sound of everyone ripping Matty to shreds, so Kailer didn’t get to ask whether or not they found out anything about planes. Kailer’s not worried about his soul, but the logic makes a strange kind of sense; after all, he traveled 429 miles in five and a half hours once, and that was a little too fast for his heart to keep up.)
Fuck it. Kailer’s been trying to write a response for the past ten days, and he’s sick of swiping in and out of the message, staring at the keyboard so long he starts to see swirls in his vision.
Kailer drafts the text again and sends it, no context, no caption. A text travels faster than a high-speed train or a jet. Maybe it’ll pick his heart back up on the way.
#I don’t know how this song ended up on my Spotify wrapped because phoebe bridgers is too emotionally damaging for me to listen to like.#at all unless i am In It HOWEVER. there is this one silly video that brings me so much joy and made me feel semi-reasonable about listening#to kyoto & it’s the one video of the two painter guys painting the room & the lil guy is being a menace & the other guy just looks at him s#fondly & so lovingly & is that not the thesis of kailer yamamoto. be small be a menace be beloved by everyone. ANYWAY#liv in the replies#look this was going to be such a different thing and then. my brain went HEY BUDDY GUESS THE FUCK WHAT kyoto is a city in Japan.#day off in kyoto. guess who’s Japanese. guess what the nhl loves to do as HIFE publicity. also growing the AAPI audience is HUGE and i thin#they should. like originally i had NO idea what this was going to be (i’m so lying. the line ‘i’m gonna kill you’ but incredibly fond a la#the two painters video kept replaying in my head and i was like l m a o. klimmer & kailer. no plot all vibes it’s klimmer & Kailer that’s i#there is no real plot there is no actual idea the amount of googling that i did to write just this is UNREASONABLE i would love to be norma#about anything ever but i ALSO invented so much backstory to this that has no way of appearing in the actual fic and also jokes for ME#for instance. YPPI is the american manufacturer for yamaha motorcycles and. suzuki. yamamoto. (it’s not my brainworms it’s due to a fancam)#respectfully also i cannot write this fic. i have never been to japan and i think it would take me eight years to google enough#to be relatively comfortable like y’all have never seen the extensive research i put in to fucking phiLLY and a whole other COUNTRY???#where the premise of the fic is learning how to be a tourist in your life and sometimes you have to grow out of things?#yeah i AM going to make something with the idea of Momijigari and life is ephemeral. is that a plot? no it’s vibes.#kailer goes to japan in the fall and realizes he’s a liar. who lies. (he misses [redacted]) (the redacted is because i haven’t decided)#also also. the garden reference is because a) i spent WAY TOO MUCH TIME ON GOOGLE and found out things to do in saitama and also that#kailer’s grandpa had a meticulous garden and i just think that’s neat#hiding-from-reality-56#random ficlet is unbeta’d un-anything’d i don’t know WHERE this came from or the real plot of it at all. ok thanks byeeeee
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have many creative endeavors I would like to work on but my brain won't fucken. get into the flow of it
#i have such a fun idea for my next drawing but it's like MY HANDS HAVE FORGOTTEN HOW TO DRAW#so i was like whatever i'll try again later i'll work on vegas wedding fic. opened the doc. STUCK. BRAIN NOT GIVING ME ANYTHING#what if i ran into traffic#it's fine it's cool it's fine [screams]#when being creative brings you peace n calm but you seemingly can't tap into it in this moment? carnage. i'm burning the city down#g txt
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#tag talk#I feel so fucking great today. ironically I'm having trouble getting anything done because I keep just lying down to sigh contentedly#idk. I just feel so genuinely happy.#maybe it has something to do with the smell bout of random depression disappearing at least for now. no longer shitting out my guts either#and also I get to see the cute girl who also likes me back today so that's super pogchamp.#ugh do y'all have any idea how absolutely down bad I am for her??? like. seriously.#I know this won't be a long term thing but damn if I'm not gonna appreciate it for the two years I'm still living in this city.#like. I knew things would get better eventually. I was seventeen and telling myself things would one day be better#sure it's taken eight years but like... fuckin hell I'm self actualizing for real now.#mood stabilizers. adhd meds. hrt. I'm finally able to address the problems I've been battling my whole life.#and moving out from my parents has given me the freedom to figure shit out apart from the situation that's been fucking me up all my life#I just. fucking hell this is so nice.#YOOO I HAVE JIGGLY CALF MUSCLES AGAIN HELL YEAH#I've been a little wasted away for the past year but I've started working out again since since got adhd meds and damn#I don't like being so awfully skinny so it's nice to have curves and slight jiggles on my body again#calf muscles my beloved#I'm learning to love my arm muscles but I've always loved my leg muscles. partially I think cause leg muscles are associated with feminine#whereas arm muscles are culturally seen as masculine. so that kind of got embedded in my brain growing up. but I'm learning to love both#I also just love my body working like it's supposed to. the joy of a well oiled machine doing what it should.#ofc it's not always consistent. but it's nice when it's working as it should#also I bought a wireless charger for my phone since the charging port got even more fucked up and now barely works at all#so honestly that lifted a pretty big stressor off my mind since phone dying is a huge problem and a new phone is expensive#so I'm feeling more carefree with that at least temporarily fixed. won't have to worry about my phone again for prolly at least another year
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my dm asked me to guest in one of his other groups and im really excited but i only had like a week and its TOMORROW and im either 0planning or 100 percent planned kinda person with no inbetween so im just here like....stressed
#im also doing this to help a friend in the group out cause the poor guys dnd character cannot get a date in game#so its like extra stressing cause i fucking hate flirting even in a fake sense im so fucking terrible at it#like i just..... do not know how to flirt everyone ive ever dated has flirted w/ me first#i also have my other game tomorrow right before this one so its like i dont have time but i cant make my brain work it doesnt wanna plan#sam plays dnd#maybe it would help to talk about it to the void? you can send any thought if you read this i guess#im playing the mayor of a town currently being occupied by the army the players are a part of#(not my choice the dms)#my uncle is the regions ruler#i kinda want to play someone who is calm and intelligent and strategic#basically the goal is to get a political marriage to keep me as ruler of the town (and maybe even get higher up)#the dm also mentioned that there is a tarrasque under the city and i can try to lure the players there to kill them off but im like#i can either romance a pc or i can lure them to their death i cannot do both i know the dude wont go for that#so im throwing that detail out but its in the corner of my eye and its stressing me out anyway#maybe ill use it if im rejected? thats not a bad idea
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Do not think ‘oh I can just push through the end of this bit of the game real quick and then go to sleep’, it is a trap, you will be going to bed four hours before you’re supposed to be up for work and not even feeling that bad about it because Baldur’s Gate 3 good
#act two is done and dusted#definitely not my vibes for an act but I did like all the minibosses being defeatable through non-combat#love just entering an intro cutscene for a boss and going ‘damn what if you died though?’ and they go ‘good idea! I shall explode now!’#the surgeon freaked me out though that was a bad time like yay no boss battle but now I have to watch something real fucked up#I’m ready to be in a city though I love city vibe#also get more romance scenes with karlach lemme smooch more please#brain thoughts
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