#i like low key have a weird thing about my birthday

[chippdhearts]

.

[lesbiansanemi]

Officially 23 ig

[insanechayne]

~ ~ ~

[starlightwoofwoof]

💀🎃✨ SM x MLB DTIYS ✨🎃💀

GUYS I MADE IT-

I finally made the SM x MLB DTIYS!!

here’s Metamorpho, surrounded by some of my favorite villains he’s created! (low-key felt bad about leaving Father Gregor out- so I kinda symbolized him with that butterfly and shine behind it near Metamorpho’s hand)

(thanks to @crossover-enthusiast for the idea! I didn’t make them silhouettes but whatever-)

Anyway, so, here’s the deal

honestly, I’m not sure if I wanna make this a ‘contest’ of any sorts like usual DTIYS things- mostly because I feel like I would have trouble picking any winners or anything

but some good news for you guys : since it isn’t a challenge, I don’t think there’s any deadline, so you can do this whenever- and even if there’s not any prizes, if any of you guys have any AUs, it’ll be a good excuse for me to draw them anyway lol

If any of this is too much cause I feel like it is, you can change any poses, remove any of the characters, and even add your favorite villains if they aren’t in here idc lol just make it SM x MLB related in some way

Make sure you tag me and use the tag!! (one rule, uh, don’t do anything, like, NSFW or weird, y’know okie ty)

Here’s all the references to the original characters if you need them! (sorry if they’re, like, shaded too much lol)

(oh ye one more thing uhhh my birthday is on Wednesday the 4th soooooooo :3)

[aomine-ryo]

A lil scenario for Aomine’s birthday because he is, in fact, the best boy. It’s nothing too intricate, I just like to think that Aomine is super nervous around his crushes even though he’s a narcissistic bitch on court (love him tho)

Scenario: Aomine’s crush confesses to him on his birthday

gender neutral reader

Birthdays were just another day for Aomine, and he’s perfectly fine keeping it that way. His complaints begin when everyone around him makes it a bigger deal than it is. And the biggest culprit of this was Momoi.

As much as Aomine loved his friendship with Momoi, it’s days like this where he wished she would just tone it down a bit. He knew that whatever she did was out of love for him, but the way she showed it was way too flamboyant for Aomine.

This year round though, she seemed to be a little too quiet about her plans for the day. She still was the first one to wish him and give him a gift, but she hadn’t mentioned anything else. Either she finally respected his wishes to keep things low-key, or there was a surprise party looming around the corner. And Aomine had an awful feeling it was the latter.

“Dai-chan, you don’t have any plans later today, do you?” Momoi questioned as the two of them walked to school together that morning.

“I do,” Aomine murmured, letting out a big yawn as he rubbed his eyes to wake himself up .

“Huh? What plans?” Momoi questioned. Even though he was half asleep, he could hear the panic in her tone. She was so obvious.

“I have a date with my bed,” Aomine said simply, daydreaming about being wrapped under his warm blanket again.

Momoi clicked her tongue in annoyance. “It’s your birthday. You’re not just gonna spend it in your room.”

“There’s nothing stopping me,” Aomine replied.

“I’m stopping you,” Momoi snapped. “Let’s have a dinner at mine.”

“What? Just you and me?” Aomine questioned absentmindedly, dark blue eyes catching a glimpse of his classmate walking through the school gates.

As soon as Momoi noticed you, she knew she’d completely lost Aomine’s attention. But she carried on anyway, “I thought of inviting Tetsu,” she paused for a moment as a grin took over her face. “If you want, I can invite Y/N as well.”

Aomine snapped back into reality upon hearing your name. “What? No! That’d be so weird,” he protested, his face heating up.

Momoi sighed, “When will you make a move on them?”

“I don’t like Y/N like that,” he replied defensively, avoiding eye contact with Momoi as he did so.

“You’re not fooling anyone, but sure,” she said as the two of them approached their classrooms. “Anyways, you, me and Tetsu tonight, okay?”

“Yeah, yeah whatever,” Aomine rolled his eyes before entering his classroom and plopping down in the seat behind you.

“Daiki! Happy birthday!” You said, turning around to face him with a wide smile.

Aomine was suddenly more awake than ever. “Oh thanks,” he said curtly, “how come you’re not passed out on the desk like every other day?”

“Had to stay awake to be the first in the class to wish you,” you shrugged, “Plus you would’ve woken me up anyways because you’re an asshole like that.”

Aomine chuckled at the sentiment, “How sweet of you to stay up for me,” his tone was mocking; it made you want to punch him.

“You’re so annoying,” you rolled your eyes.

The rest of his school day was fairly normal— napping in class, finding any opportunity to annoy you, drooling over you when you weren’t looking— the usual. In a way, he was glad his birthday was on a Friday; being in school meant that he got to spend his day with you, though he wasn’t exactly pleased to be waking up at 7 a.m. for it.

“Dai-chan! Hurry up! I’ve got to prepare for the dinner!” Momoi called out as she stood at the door of your classroom at the end of the day, interrupting a nonsensical back and forth between you and Aomine.

The navy haired boy sighed, “Satsuki, that’s a problem you created for yourself.”

“You say that, but when the food takes too long to cook it’s non-stop complaining from your end,” Momoi retorted, earning a small laugh from you.

“Whatever. See you Monday, loser,” Aomine said to you, his hand reaching over to your head and messing with your hair.

“Stop that!” you whined, trying to swat his arm away and regaining your composure once you did. “Have a good birthday, stupid,” you said, packing up your stuff once he headed out.

“You guys are so cute,” Momoi beamed once it was just her and Aomine in the hallways.

“Can we please not have this conversation again? Just for today?” Aomine groaned, already frustrated with himself for the lack of flirting he’s been able to do with you. He didn’t know what it was. It was usually easy for him to flirt with girls he was interested in, but with you he was always nervous; afraid he’d mess it up with one wrong move.

Once Aomine had gotten home, he was absolutely exhausted. He laid down in his bed and let out a heavy sigh. He didn’t know if he had it in him to go for dinner with Momoi and Kuroko— let alone whatever Momoi was covering up. He just wanted to nap and maybe just scroll through his socials— maybe he’ll find the perfect meme to send to you so that he has an excuse to talk to you again. Nevertheless, he did end up drifting off into the nap he’d been waiting for since he had woken up that morning.

Aomine was stirred awake by the sound of his phone’s ringtone. He squinted at the bright screen, seeing Momoi’s name and quickly remembering that it was still his birthday. He brought the phone up to his ear, “Hello,” he said groggily, eyes closing once again.

“Where are you? I’ve been trying to reach you for the past half hour!” Momoi scolded into the phone.

“I was asleep,” Aomine answered simply.

Momoi sighed in disappointment, “Get to mine quick. Tetsu and I are hungry.”

“Mhm,” Aomine hummed before ending the phone call. It took him a moment, but he finally gathered the strength to drag himself out of bed and into the shower, cussing out his birthday each step of the way.

Aomine made it out of the house fairly quickly, but there wasn’t a single thought going through his head when he walked up the driveway of Momoi’s house. He didn’t bother ringing the doorbell— he never did. He took his shoes off and headed towards the living room, “Oi Satsuki—”

“HAPPY BIRTHDAY AOMINE!”

Aomine’s heart leaped out of his chest for a moment at the sudden chorus when he stepped into the room. He had fully forgotten about the possibility of a surprise party. Standing in front of him was a crowd of basically all the people he knew— the Miracles, his teammates, some of his classmates, and most notably— you.

“What on earth…” was all he was really able to say. He was still trying to process the fact that you were here. He definitely did not put enough effort into his outfit for this to be happening.

“Were you surprised?” Momoi asked, pouncing up and down like an excited puppy.

“No, you’re a bad liar. I’m just sleepy,” Aomine answered truthfully, causing everyone to erupt into a fit of joking booing and jeering.

“Okay okay, we’ll get to the cake in a second, but first you have to take your birthday shot,” Kagami grinned, swinging his arm around Aomine’s shoulders and handing him a shot glass filled with vodka.

Aomine downed the shot with no hesitation. He needed all the confidence he could get to try to flirt with you— not that he really had a game plan in mind.

Admittedly, it was rather nice to have everyone all together. It had been a while since he had seen Kuroko so it was nice catching up with him and also bullying Kagami whilst he was at it. Moreover, he couldn’t help but steal glances of you chatting with people and swaying along to the music— he still couldn’t believe that you were actually there.

He did, however, make the stupid mistake of matching his drinks with Kise— who had a much higher tolerance than he did. Aomine soon found himself needing to get away from the music and the crowd, so he stepped out to the front porch, taking a deep breath of the fresh air. He took a seat on the steps, blankly staring out into the empty street as he tried to stop his vision from spinning.

He heard the front door behind him open and shut, steps moving towards him. “What’s the birthday boy doing all alone out here?” you said, taking a seat next to him.

Aomine’s lips instinctively broke out into a smile upon hearing your voice, “Trying to stop the world from spinning. And also avoiding Kise because I cannot stomach another shot,” he answered honestly.

“I do not envy you right now,” you chuckled, knowing the feeling all too well.

“You haven’t had anything to drink?” Aomine questioned, trying to meet your eyes but failing miserably.

“Not really, I don’t let myself go all out around people I don’t know too well,” you shrugged.

“You don’t need to worry about that, I’ll take care of you if you get too drunk,” Aomine said, a slight slur in his words.

You couldn’t help but laugh at the gesture, “As sweet as that is, you are in no state to be taking care of yourself— let alone me.”

“I’d sober up if I need to,” Aomine said confidently.

“I’ll take your word for it,” you said, tone filled with sarcasm. A silence fell between you two as you both looked out into the street. It wasn’t an awkward silence, but it wasn’t exactly comfortable either— for you, at least. Aomine seemed to be in another dimension by the looks of it, but you felt like there was something that needed to be said. “Oh right!” You said shuffling around and breaking the silence suddenly as you reached into your pocket and pulled out an envelope. “Here, this is for you.”

“What is it?” Aomine asked, brows furrowed in confusion as he took the plain white envelope that said ‘To Daiki’ in your handwriting on it.

“It’s a birthday card,” you said, fidgeting with your hands nervously as you pondered over whether this was the right move.

“Can I open it?” Aomine asked, his respectful manners around you remaining even though he was absolutely hammered.

You hesitated for a moment as you thought over the contents of the card. While it was just a greeting card, you also put down how you felt about him— more specifically, how you had a crush on him. You weren’t sure how he’d react and it was eating you alive. “Um, okay. But don’t read it aloud. And don’t look at me when you read it,” you said, burying your face in your palms as he opened the envelope.

You saw his smile widen upon seeing the card in the first place— it had a cute little cartoon dog with a birthday hat and balloon on the front. Aomine thought that it was such a cute design, it almost reminded him of Nigou. He opened the card up eagerly, wondering what had you so shy. His eyes scanned over the words you had written down, his whole body seizing when he got to the words ‘I like you.’ He read it over and over again in disbelief, sure that it was his drunken mind making him see words that weren’t there. He even ran his finger over the words to make sure he wasn’t imagining it. Damn those birthday wishes work quick.

He slowly looked over at you, meeting your eyes through the gaps between your fingers. “Are you serious?” he asked softly.

“It would be really cruel for me to lie about something like that,” you said, trying to use humour to cope with the nervousness.

Aomine leaned over and wrapped his arms around you tightly, pulling you into a hug. It definitely caught you off guard because it was now your turn to freeze.

“I feel the same way,” he mumbled into your shoulder, your tension beginning to ease with his words. He didn’t exactly intend for the hug, it was something his body did before he could even process that it was happening. He wanted to kiss you, but he was afraid that he wouldn’t remember it the next day— a stupid thought, but what else could you expect from him?

“You have no idea how glad I am to hear that. I genuinely thought I was gonna vomit out of nervousness the whole way here,” you said, finding comfort in the sweet scent of Aomine’s cologne and the sound of his light chuckle.

Aomine finally broke away from the hug, cupping your face in his hands as his dark blue eyes met yours. “You’ve officially made this the best birthday I’ve had in a while,” he grinned, his lips were so close that you could feel his breath on your skin.

“You’re welcome, stupid,” you replied in what was barely a whisper, your eyes darting between his eyes and lips before he finally closed the gap. His lips were soft against yours. Even though he’d been waiting for this moment for ages, he wanted to savour it. There was no need for him to go all in. He just wanted to melt into your touch and bask in your gentleness. The world finally stopped spinning; as your fingers ran through his hair, he did his best to remember this moment. Your soft touch, your fresh scent, the sound of your gentle breaths— he wanted to remember every single bit of you that made his day.

[enoe-of-noen]

Apple’s Birthday

Forgot to do art for his bday soo, happy late birthday my Luci pookie <3

Mc walked back from the store happily, practically skipping their way home. The demons around them looked at them curiously, giving weird looks. Why was the human so jolly today?

Mc took out their keys and opened the doors to HOL, bolting to Lucifer’s room. Almost tripping on the stairs, they caught some of the brothers’ attention. “Mc? What’s got ya in such a hurry?” Mammon appeared. “Sup Mams, trying to get something to Luci.”

“Eh? Mc, Mc!~ Is that little gift for our dear Lucifer?~” Asmodeus sprung up behind them, draping his arms over Mc’s shoulders. “Oh yeah, it’s his birthday today.” Mammon murmured.

“Should we get him a cake?” Beelzebub walked to the trio, chips in hands. “Ah! Good idea!” Mammon grinned.

“At least make it your money this time, Mammon, lol,” Leviathan leaned against Beelzebub, playing on his switch. “I do not need to witness last year’s fiasco again,” Mc chuckled.

“Oh come on, Mc! Cut me some slack, I was low on grimm!”

“You always are,” Belphegor yawned. “Where’s Satan?” Mc raised a brow. “Outside, he found a litter of cats.” Belphegor mumbled. Leviathan looked up from his game and noticed the box in Mc’s hands. “What’s that?”

“Luci’s gift, something I bought and something I made. I’m really proud of it,” Mc grinned. “Aww, that’s so cute, Mc!” Asmodeus kissed their cheek. “Thanks, Asmo.”

“Lucifer’s really busy right now, though,” Beelzebub said through chews. “Ugh, on his birthday?” Leviathan furrowed his brows. “Huh, I thought at least Diavolo would give him a day off.” Mammon scratched his chin.

“I’ll ask him about it,” Mc pat Asmodeus off of them and continued walking to Lucifer’s room.

Arriving at the doors, Mc knocked lightly. “Who is it?” A voice came from behind. “It’s Mc, Lucifer.” Mc heard muffled steps and the doors unlock, a tired Lucifer smiling at them. They noticed the eye bags and the unkept hair instantly. They slightly frowned.

“Afternoon, Mc. Did you have a good day?”

“Yeah, I did. Can I come inside, please? I have something to show you.” They peered inside and saw the big piles of paper and visibly grimaced. Lucifer chuckled at their expression.

“I’ll make it quick if you’re too busy…” they pouted. “I’m never too busy for you, Mc. Come in.” He held the door open for them like a gentleman, slowly closing it behind them. Mc glared at the papers.

“Mc, you don’t need to worry. Diavolo simply forgot a lot of things that were due by the end of the week and I figured I could take the responsibility.”

“But on your birthday?”

“Not to worry, this was of my own choice.”

“I figured, Diavolo probably tried to give you the day, didn’t he?” Mc sighed. Lucifer rubbed the back of his neck nervously, albeit ashamed. “I know you hold yourself as the responsible one, as Diavolo’s most trusted friend and all but…” Mc kept staring at the papers. Lucifer followed their gaze and sighed himself, raking a hand through his hair.

“Forgive me, Mc. I never meant to make you worry. However-”

“Lucifer.” Mc sternly stared, interrupting his train of thought. His breath hitched. He felt himself crumble in front of them, relaxing his shoulders. The way they softly spoke to him, yet their eyes…their eyes. They have beautiful eyes.

Mc blinked and looked down at their box. Lucifer raised a brow. “This is for you.” They held it up to him. It made Lucifer’s heart race. “For…me?” His voice filled with fondness, carefully holding the box. “Can I?”

“Of course.” Mc smiled. Lucifer meticulously yet effortlessly pulled the blue ribbon off and opened to find a card, a hair clip, and a poison apple in its own little box.

“Oh, Mc. These are wonderful.” Lucifer looked in front of him and made a little noise to see no Mc.

“Psst,” Mc’s cheekily chirped. Lucifer looked down and saw Mc sitting on the ground, patting the spot in front of them. “Sit.”

“Mc, it might be easier to sit on the chairs,” Lucifer said as he sat down. “I want to show off the gifts,” Mc pointed at the box. Lucifer took the card out and opened it to see a little paper cutout of himself.

“Oh? What’s this?”

“I made a doodle of you. It’s cute, yeah?”

“You’ve been spending a little too much time with Leviathan, haven’t you?”

“Excuse you, I’ve always been artsy!” Mc feigned frustration, making Lucifer laugh. Lucifer pulled out the hair clip and raised a brow. The hair clip seemed to be handmade, the eldest born’s symbol and apples plastered the surface.

“Seriously?”

“Yes, let me put it on you,” Mc scooched next to him and carefully took the hair clip from Lucifer’s hand. They pulled some of his hair back and placed the hair clip. “Comfy?”

“Yes.” He breathlessly sighed, a red tint covering his cheeks. Mc’s gentle touch made him lean into their warmth. “Oh?” Mc caressed his hair and chuckled. Lucifer let himself rest in Mc’s arms, slowly closing his eyes.

“Thank you, Mc,” he whispered. Mc smiled as they tucked the hair behind Lucifer’s ear and kissed his forehead.

“Any day, my sweet apple.”

Ayy I’m proud of this one

[darcyfangirlsfrequently]

Reaction to episode 1 of season 2 of CME

Spoilers below the cut

The way the episode started with those cops that we don't know and then Emily's "I have" introducing her??? Amazing. Chills.

The way she just waltzed in and slowly and calmly detailed things about the killing that the cops didn't know yet was BEAUTIFUL

Penelope's birthday!!! (Still sad I didn't get to watch this yesterday ON my birthday, but whatever)

Ooh okay I thought that that snippet of Luke and Penelope was from BEFORE the start of the party but clearly it's after if everyone is already there

JJ and Tara being "mad" and Luke for whatever he just did and him being all cheeky and braggy WARMS MY HEART I MISSED THESE PEOPLE AND I LOVE THEM

"What is wrong with you?" "What is wrong with me? *gestures to Penelope* what about her?" I LOVE THEM

"I might have what I said tattooed to my body" "oh i dare you" "how dare you dare me?" the flirting is STRONG with these two

The banter!! The jokes!! I love this scene so much!!

QUEEF LESSONS??????? WHAT THE F U C K?

Penelope actually calling Luke by his name will never NOT make me smile

Oh no. A soft little moment with Penelope and Dave? I might cry

"This was good. You seem good." "I am. *kisses her cheek*" yep i'm crying

Tara and Penelope being concerned for their dad Rossi

Luke checking on his dad Rossi

Me 🤝 Penelope getting texts from our exes on our birthdays

"Put it away" I like how he's more direct with her now. Calls her out when she's wrong.

PENELOPE SHUT YOUR MOUTH WHY WOULD YOU SAY THAT TO HIM

"I said I didn't wanna know, you were right the first time" yes luke stand your ground!

Luke looking SO ANNOYED when she asks him to dissect things with her JEALOUS LUKE MY BELOVED (if this were a romcom movie this would be where Luke just grabs her face and kisses her) (@lklvz i know what we're discussing at a later date)

"Oh god I'm doing it. Why am I doing that?" YES PENELOPE. STOP THAT LINE OF THINKING.

"I am moving on. Eyes on the prize." her saying that TO LUKE is driving me crazy. Yes, Penelope move on. Eyes on the prize. THE PRIZE IS RIGHT NEXT TO YOU.

Their eye contact and semi-wordless communication and everything ahhhhhhhh Garvez is so real

I wanted them to have a cute little moment where they reach for the same thing and their hands touch

Luke, from a different room: Put it away!! I LOVE THE WAY HE KNOWS HER???

Tara and JJ were there the entire time??????? they just let them be alone???? they're trying to jumpstart their ship with forced proximity

"You're HOT" JENNIFER JAREAU?????? The Jara shippers are going feral and the Jemily shippers are unsure about whether to cry or cheer, and my Temily self is weeping

"A hot mess is the term that you are searching for." Tara Lewis I am in love with you.

Tara talking about her gf 🥰 (Emily)

"Definitely not a book" i am GAGGED

Emily texting Tara "12:30. My office." Temily is real.

"we need to talk" emily i think the word you're looking for is make out

Is "we need to talk" temily code for "lets go smoke on the roof???" love that

Tara and Emily teaming up, Tara being the only person to know what's up with Emily, all of this is so good for my heart.

PAWS OFF THEIR CASES, REBECCA

how did rebecca's hair change that much in "two weeks" lol

oh she just handed off the file to Voit. Lovely. Not that I'm surprised.

"good book, I hope" HE WILL NOT LET IT GO

PHIL COULSONNNN

Elias showing off his acting skills. He is good.

"What the hell is Gold Star?" Luke I am hoping you're lying

Temily pitching a case like the wives they are

Rossi THROWING A GLASS AT A WALL

REBECCA. GO. AWAY.

Rebecca Wilson you are one of the worst people i have ever met

Rossi and Emily fighting feels so weird to me

Bertoli's wife being killed to punish him and hurt him through survivor's guilt reminds me of Luke and Phil

aaaand bertoli shot himself. can't say i'm surprised.

LUKE BEING SMART AND KNOWING THINGS AND GETTING ANSWERS LIKE THE BEST BOY HE IS (and Penelope being low-key impressed)

it was LUKE'S idea to get Tyler's help????

Emily asking if Penelope has any objections and then Penelope LOOKING AT LUKE

why do i have a weird get feeling i'm gonna like tyler this season. or maybe at least just hate him less.

Penelope not that you should be trying to impress tyler, but if you ask Luke if you look good, well, yes is the answer.

"my cats are my boyfriend" something tells me Penelope listens to "Karma" by Taylor Swift

Luke's overly fake voice greeting tyler I LOVE HIM

Luke baby i know you hate the mans guts but YOU INVITED HIM IN (this scene is hilarious tho)

*to penelope* "I'm happy to see you again." *to luke* "you, not so much" I'M CACKLING

"What, me? Oh you are missing out." I LOVE HIM THIS IS GONNA BE SO GOOD

Her thanking Luke for sticking up in that conversation. Garvez. Is. So. Real.

Rebecca is so hot and cold with Tara I hate it.

JJ you know all about being forced to confess something while being held against your will, don't you

the way Garvez are being put together in EVERY. SCENE.

Yes Penelope! Yell at him!

EMILY SAYING FUCK

Putting Tyler and Luke side by side in a frame only makes me more sure that they're making them similar on purpose. Almost the same outfit, badge in the same spot, similar hair style and facial features

"Who wants first crack at him? *points at Tyler* and not you." the comedy is back and i am loving it

[that-writing-raccoon]

MEET CHAOTIC PROMPTS

Alright, kids, listen up.

We’re all suckers for a good meet-cute. Don’t even try to lie to me. Like, yeah, they’re cliché, but, if done well, it can be really cute, hence the name.

Meet-uglies on the other hand can be super funny, and they almost always lead to enemies-to-lovers or rivals-to-lovers, even if just for a hot second. They’re great, too.

But here’s the thing:

I want more meet-chaotics. Not meet-cutes, not meet-uglies, meet-chaotics.

What do I mean by this?

Well, you know how crazy life can be sometimes? How wack shit happens, it makes a good story to tell your friends, and it makes you low-key question reality for a second? Yeah. Meet-chaotics are like that. How you met is just so weird and chaotic that it was a bonding experience.

Here are some prompts/concepts so you understand what I’m getting at:

“Normal”/Humor:

 “I’m an uber driver dropping off my last customer, and you and your friends(?) just jumped into my backseat right as they got out and yelled a variety of ‘DRIVE! FUCKING DRIVE!’ and ‘FLOOR IT!’ There are flashing lights behind me, but I panicked and stepped on the gas, and now you’re trying to assure me that it’s not what it looks like, but I’m too busy worrying that I’m a wanted criminal now.” 

Bonus points for found family and/or polyamory!

“I’ve had a really bad day, and it started to rain, so, because I’m dramatic, I blasted my ‘*insert playlist name here*’ and lied down on my sidewalk/lawn/driveway facing the sky, and you just drove by, backed up, and ran out to join me as ‘Chasing Cars’ by Snow Patrol was playing. I have never met you before, but I’m pretty sure we’ve bonded and might be soulmates.” (Yes, I got this idea from a TikTok. What of it?).

“I was walking my dog at the park when he got off his leash, and now I’m running after him through the park calling his name and yelling to ‘GET THAT DOG!’ You’re having a barbecue/family reunion/birthday party, and my dog sprints towards you, knocks someone over, and begins eating your food. You see me sprinting towards you and trying to catch my dog, but he’s faster, so now we’re both chasing my dog, and I may or may not be swearing words that’d make a sailor blush. Eventually, one of us or a random stranger catches him, and we finally stop, and, hey, sorry about that, but, wazow! You’re pretty cute.” 

Bonus points for anyone vaulting over a table or something.

“We’re on our way to class, and I just witnessed you run past me down the stairs holding a bunch of books, trip, roll down two flights, and roll to your feet and keep running like nothing happened. And, like, we didn’t talk, and I don’t think you noticed me, but now I can’t help thinking of you. Like, that was impressive, but are you okay?”

“We’re at a house party, and it’s gotten pretty wild. Music is blasting from the speakers, people are dancing on tables, stuff is breaking, etc. Suddenly, the music shuts off, and someone yells, “POLICE!” and everyone s c a t t e r s. It’s pure chaos. I trip while running outside and curl up in a ball to not get trampled, but then a hand reaches down and pulls me up, it’s you, and we run off together still holding hands. Who are you, again?”

Bonus points if this goes back to the uber driver prompt. 

Bonus bonus points if this couple is coming from the same place as the folks from the first prompt, so it’s same universe, but they’re completely different people having their own meet-chaotics running from the police ‘cause they were at the same party.

Could be any illegal/big crowd scenario. A concert, a protest, etc. 

Sci-Fi:

“We live in a world where superheroes exist. One day, I’m minding my own business in my own apartment when you, *insert superhero name here,* crash through my wall while I’m just lounging on the couch, mug of coffee/preferred drink to my lips, feet up on my coffee table, and laptop open on my lap. We stare at each other. You get up, apologize, and fly off through the hole in the wall. Little do I know, you feel bad about the whole thing and decide to try making it up to me, except every thing you try just descends us more and more into chaos.”

Bonus points if this ends up being enemies to lovers, seeing as the protagonist, Character A, would probably be hella bitter about not having the specific superhero insurance needed to fix their wall. 

Bonus bonus points if Superhero has to save A from x during one of their attempts to fix the situation. 

“It’s the zombie apocalypse. I’ve set up camp in a (mostly) abandoned town, scavenging to survive. One day, there’s an unusual amount of zombies in the road. Panicked, I start to climb something. When I’m about halfway up, I hear a weird noise, and look down just in time to see you and your friend whizzing by on a shopping cart down the incline- you in the basket and your friend riding on the back. You’re screaming/yelling and swinging a bat around. The zombies are too slow and uncoordinated to catch up with you. At the last second, you look up at me and we make eye-contact mid-me making at wtf face. It’s such a stupid strategy that I’m low key in love.”

“It’s an alien invasion. We’re all running and screaming for our lives. Suddenly, there’s a spot light, and you start being pulled up into a ship. You panic and grab something. For some unknown, ungodly reason, I try to help you. It goes as well as it sounds. Cue us both getting beamed up while holding on to each other for dear life.”

“We’re on a spaceship. There are so many people on board that it’s impossible to truly know or recognize anyone. I’m working or reading or what have you, when I so happened to glance up at my porthole/window, just in time to see you, who’d been fixing something on the outside of the ship, floating away and doing some space gymnastics with your lead and etc., and swimming, to get back to the ship. I do what anyone responsible would do and sprint off to the docks to get you back safe inside.”

Bonus if Floating Person is just doing the absolute most ridiculous things to make it back.

I have more, but I feel like this post is long enough. But yeah. Something something meeting someone in the most chaotic, stupid, and unhinged way gets to me. Like, we’ve all have shared moments with a stranger because we both witnessed something or been involved in something dumb or crazy. And usually it’s like, eye-contact or brief, awkward commentary, then at the end of the day you go home and it’s just a funny story that only you guys experienced. Something about it just speaks to me.

[anonymoushouseplantfan]

"You can’t be a casual Cali/Montecito royal." Hi, Plant, could you explain a bit more what you mean by this. Because my view is if they had been gracious towards the RF on Oprah, (i.e. we're beloved family members, but taking some time out of the spotlight. Then then come back and slowly work on projects in the US.) They could then come back for Trooping etc. Because the Princess Madeline managed to live in the US and keep her Royal image intact. (As far as I'm aware.)

I think that was the expectation in 2020. They would keep their UK charities and Frogmore and remain “beloved family members” attending family events but essentially living their own lives. Their LA lives would presumably retain a royalesque quality because they would go from their last appearances in the UK (which were pretty glam, thanks to Sarah Latham) to the Invictus Games then Trooping, polo season, and Balmoral. They were also going to do their own royalesque events, including a big fundraising tour for Sentebale and a charity concert for Invictus. That was the 2020 plan, I believe.

That’s similar to what Madeline did, although she was more low-key about it. It’s basically a royal life in the US. If the Harkles has stuck to well-known royal behaviors like the Christmas cards and birthday pictures, they could have successfully created an American Royal family. I think that’s what everyone expected them to do.

But Covid messed that up. They kept it going for a while bc everyone was doing Zoom charity calls and that kept the illusion of equivalency going, but the illusion finally shattered with the Oprah interview and then Philip’s funeral. It didn’t help that they were busy embracing James Corden and Ellen Degeneres and behaving like Hollywood clowns. Plus the British charities were sidelined and royalesque behaviors like Christmas cards and birthday pics were not consistently deployed. Their royal brand was steadily eroding.

At that point, they should have focused on their Hollywood projects and building their California brands, but they didn’t. They focused on lawsuits and family drama. They also did a bunch of paid awards, which weren’t really meaningful. The few projects they showcased felt very unprofessional. They didn’t have a real office, just those guesthouse desks. They were renting random locations and doing “coastal grandmother” lawn interviews with Gloria Steinem. Meghan was having fake tea parties with celebrities and Harry was juggling and the whole thing felt very bland and amateurish. They had a random NY tour for no reason (to read her book or something?) and jumped on activist bandwagons haphazardly (BLM, family leave, Iran, Ukraine, Uvalde, whatever…). It was weird.

That’s what I mean by “Casual California Royal.” Things like sending an olive cake to WCF and planting forget-me-nots at a random school. It all felt very whimsical and unprofessional. Worst of all, it did not feel purposeful or passionate.

They the documentary and the book came out and they royal brand just imploded. There’s nothing left now. All they can do is try to build up their celebrity image.

[kokusfluffyhair]

Douma as Your Boyfriend (18+!)

(art credit: @HakogardenMiko) Request for @rosethornpaw -- I'm sorry it took so long 😔

+ he loves to dance (especially in an outfit like the one in the picture)

+ he will spoil you with gifts, vacations, massages, bubble baths, dinners, whatever he can possibly think of

+ he finds meaning out of spoiling you

+ if you're looking for a skincare partner, he's your guy

+ he will do sheet masks and any kind of self care with you. the problem is that he's very picky about the products he uses, so if the two of you go shopping for new products, expect it to take a looooong time

+ your bathroom is overrun with his hair care products

+ seriously, you can make a functioning small store with the amount of hair products he has alone

+ he wears makeup and wants you to compliment it

+ he likes to smell good and uses body wash and perfumes to make him smell like vanilla and lotus flowers

+ he cries during movies. most of the times it is fake, but it is real when he cries during fights between romantic couples

+ you will have the softest and most luxurious bed living with him. the man's got to get his beauty sleep and he needs soft, plush blankets, silk pillowcases, and stuffed animals to do so

+ his favourite stuffed animal is a light brown rabbit that he named Snuggles

+ when you aren't together, he will always be sending you messages and pictures

+ your phone is basically occupied by Douma

+ he has so many pictures of you on his phone, it looks like he's your stalker

+ he kind of does low-key stalk you. he knows your schedule and will be waiting for you when you're done with school or work

+ he always brings boba tea for you though

+ you two would do well if you started some couple's day in the life type of videos on YouTube or TikTok

+ he loves sweets. I mean loooooveess sweets, especially soft and creamy cakes with strawberry

+ you can be talking to him while he's eating those kinds of cakes and he's not paying attention, until suddenly he looks over at you with that weird creeper face and asks "Hm?" with cream at the corners of his mouth

(yeah, this is the creeper face I was talking about)

+ he likes foot massages, so if you're willing to give him that, he will melt in front of you and be moaning as you do the job

+ he's a power bottom, prefers not to switch

+ if you wear a strap-on and give it to him in the ass, he will be forever thankful

+ just stimulate tf out of his prostate please

+ and squeeze his nipples. he will squeal

+ do not ever tell him that he needs an eyebrow trim or styling

+ he's really sensitive to the sun, so don't tease him about that either (even if he is not a demon, or if demons get some medicine that makes them sun-resistant, Douma has a form of albinism so he is especially sun sensitive)

+ he loves giving hugs

+ he has a list of strange fetishes but most of them include feet and cream

+ he will probably forget your anniversary and birthday. he doesn't mean to, but these things just don't click in his mind

+ he also forgets his own birthday

+ when you throw him a party for his birthday, he gets really excited because he thinks he's just getting a random party. but then you tell him that it's his birthday and he goes "Oh?" and it's like he's learnt something new

+ he'd prefer a polyamorous relationship. but if you're against it, he will stay loyal to you

+ he doesn't want kids. his biggest fear is your relationship degenerating like his parents' did. he thinks having kids will be a catalyst to this happening

+ "Hey, y/n ... I didn't think I could feel love, you know? I tried so hard to feel love and aaahhh I never could. But you know what? I think I love you. You make my chest warm. That's love, isn't it?"

+ you help him find peace with himself

[void-botanist]

🖊 🖊 🖊 🖊 !!!!!!!!!

Hello Ren!!! You get several paragraphs about Fay and Lou's terrible divorce :D

They're like the inverse of Sorian and Avis, because it was less clear-cut what exactly made everything fall apart. There were first the general resentments of Fay being mostly a stay-at-home mom while Lou sunk way too much of his time in the bakery - simultaneously a moneymaker, a status symbol, and the target of Fay's ire. But this was a simmer of a conflict. Things didn't start escalating until Isabel came out as trans when she was 11. Neither Fay nor Lou had any trouble with this, at least until Lou made it all about him. He would never ask Isabel to be someone she wasn't, no, but now he was left high and dry with no son to inherit his bakery, to carry on the patrilineal tradition he'd singlehandedly revived. All that time he spent there was a waste without an heir, you know?

Fay took this as proof that he did care about the bakery more than his family, and they started to fight more and more. In his deepening unhappiness Lou accidentally found a new love interest (along the lines of "she happened to help me with bakery taxes" or something) and realized that oh, maybe he really didn't need to be in this miserable marriage anymore. I think it's actually more interesting if they were "good" and never banged prior to the divorce, because that was immaterial as soon as Lou told Fay that he'd found a new partner so maybe it was time they broke up. This was the moment when Fay's poorly attached hinges flew off and she began throwing everything of his in a pile at the bottom of the stairs, followed by screaming at him to leave so loudly that the neighbors could hear.

After that the divorce should have been quick but they argued about the bakery revenues and the house and custody of Rodney and Isabel (who were 10 and 13 when the whole debacle started and pretty clearly sided with Fay, because at least she'd always been there) and whether they could get a fault divorce (honestly I'm not sure but Fay wanted one) and finally, a year and a half later, the divorce was finalized. Lou let Fay offload the house onto him and she, Isabel, and Rodney left for Antarac. He got remarried to his new partner, Annette, who he's still married to, and they later adopted a kid, Hatt, who's the middle sibling age-wise between them, Rodney, and Isabel. I have yet to work out a lot of Hatt's background but between them and Annette, Lou has learned quite a lot about how not to be transphobic and also how not to be weird by adding a "Be My Heir" letter into the mix of yearly birthday cards to your son (just don't do that). Hatt is all too happy to be the heir to the bakery but had the advantage of being adopted as a teenager and therefore not raised with Expectations like Isabel and Rodney (I suspect they were like Annette's nibling or cousin to begin with). Annette ends up low-key being Isabel's hero because she had a double mastectomy for cancer reasons and therefore also has a flat chest.

I'm indisposed for doodles/picrews atm but I want to make some of them later and get their designs a little more nailed down.

🖊️ send me a pen and get some cool OC facts 🖊️

Nicea taglist: @kahvilahuhut @malloen8c @outpost51 @writernopal @athenswrites

[gamergirlbonestaskforce141riot]

Ghost is looking down at his smartphone and holds his breath: he almost forgot about your birthday. Not Riots - YOURS, my dear friend. It's a good thing, others from 141 (and ANY other guys and ladies from CoD universe) are gathered at the common room. So Ghost clears his throat and says: "Looks like we've almost missed something critically important - our friends birthday. Now I need your best ideas on how, where and when we are celebrating. We owe her so much, we simply must make the best party, she could ever wish for." And that is where you step in. What would each of them propose? How would the party look like? What presents will they give you? What would they cook for you? How each of them would congratulate you? What will be 2-3 most important moments about this very special evening?

LOL well, my birthday is like, in twelve days, so, let's see hmmm

Soap (of course) - I think he'd propose a big ass party, knowing full well that i hate them (anxiety), but his love language I think is trying to get everyone to feel as appreciated as he can, and what would be best that surround the person in question with friends? Alternatively, he'd be perfectly ok with planning a low key reunion with a small group of people (more manageable). I think he'd either gift something he'd made, like a painting

Gaz - He'd either go all out like Soap or organize a low key reunion, like pizza and movies at someone's house, and he'd be more attentive to the birthday person's desires. I have the feel from him that he'd either get you gift cards or take you shopping for whatever you want.

Price - I think he's the more attentive but in a father like way. He'd try to remember the things you like or don't, would bring you flowers (and if you ever mentioned your favourites in his presence, he'd remember and bring those) because he is a gentleman, maybe a gift card as well and pay for you if the group goes out for your birthday (and pays for everyone else too). I wholeheartedly he'd hug you to wish you a happy birthday (Gaz and Soap would as well, but Price's hugs are something else)

Ghost - Well. Ahem. I don't think he would even register anyone's birthday unless that person was very close, like, core team of TF141 close. And I think that person would receive, maybe, a quiet nod after someone else mentions there's a birthday happening, but he'd never be the first one to mention it or attract attention into it. If you're friends he'd join the group at the pub or at the pizza+movies at home (he'd prefer that for sure). If you're more than friends, well... pizza+movies at home for sure, but alone. And about gifts, I think it'd be either an Amazon gift card or something more personal if you're involved, like a carved piece, (because I HC that he carves wood as a way to control stress)

Nikolai - If you're good friends he'll appear with some contraband/hard to find/weird but amazing shit that he'd thought you'd like (and he was right). Just like Price, he'll insist on taking the group out for dinner and drinks and pay for it (in the end Price and him will try to outwit the other to pay), or if you prefer the pizza and movies at home he'll insist on ordering the best pizza that can be found in town ('only the best for you')

The most important moment of this whole scenario? Feeling that you belong. That you have a family, even if small, different and disfunctional. Reliable ones that you know would give their life for you, and they know you'd do the same.

I always end rambling with these asks, I love them and then my brain starts spinning

[kitkatopinions]

Now that I think about it, giving more character birthdays would be a good thing, not only is it a good way to get the show trending (there’s a whole ass meme about celebrating character birthdays) but they could make little jokes about them. Seriously Qrow being born on a leap day is right there. My only guess in why they don’t is because they don’t want our world’s calendar to fuck up the worldbuilding but like…it’s already a mess so might as well

No for real, how can they fuck up worldbuilding that doesn't exist? XD Having Ruby say 'it's January' might be kind of funny because then we'd be like 'lol, January is named after the Greek god Janus, but there is no Janus in this world,' but like... It wouldn't throw off the timeline because there is no real timeline, and it wouldn't actually throw off the fantasy system they've invented because in the actual show itself, the only thing they ever say is 'it is fall,' and 'classes are out for the summer.'

It's just weird, there's so little world-building that they're not even doing the easy thing of just copy-pasting our months, because they refuse to keep a real timeline. It's low key hilarious actually, but it bypasses a whole layer of making the characters feel more real and personal and caring.

[theyaresogay]

Willow memes I found on Pinterest that I cackle at (I’m just to going keep adding to this)

one

Kit: Man it sure is dark in here…

Jade:

Kit: I'm not scared or anything.

Jade:

Kit: I mean, who is afraid of the dark these days, anyways?

Kit: Not me. No sir.

Jade: …Do you want me to hold your hand?

Kit: Yes please.

two

Elora: Start with some light flirting, okay? Subtlety is key.

Kit, nodding: Sure, I can do that.

—Later—

Kit: Hey, Jade! High Five!

*they high five*

Jade: Okay?

Kit: *interlacing their fingers* I'm in love with you.

Jade: *smiling confusedly* What?

Elora: *face palms*

three

Kit: *does something ridiculous*

Jade: Great, like I needed to get anymore attracted to you.

Kit: ... What?

Jade: ANNOYED. ANNOYED BY YOU. That’s what I said.

four

King Hastur: So, Queen Sorsha, what is your daughter like?

Sorsha: Well, she's-

Kit: Full of sass with a really cute-

Sorsha: Kit!

Kit: ...Lass. *winks at Jade*

Jade: *smitten eye rolling*

five

Graydon: Why are Kit and Jade sitting with their backs to each other?

Elora: They had a fight.

Graydon: Then why are they still holding hands?

Elora: *shrugs* Kit gets sad when they fight.

six

Kit: Mom, I understand now why you arranged a marriage for me. As a princess, and heir to the throne, it is my duty to form alliances to protect our kingdom.

Sorsha: I am so happy to hear you say that. I know it's a great sacrifice, and I am so proud that you are willing to go through with it.

Kit: ...And since Jade turned out to be essentially a Bone Reaver princess, I decided to marry her.

Sorsha: .....

seven

Elora: Do you ever want to talk about your emotions, Kit?

Kit: ...No.

Graydon: I do!

Elora: I know, Graydon.

Graydon: I'm sad!

Elora: I know, Graydon.

eight

Kit, joking around: When are you going to go out with me?

Jade: I don't know, when are you going to ask me?

—Later—

Elora: AND YOU JUST RAN AWAY?!

Kit: I DIDN'T EXPECT HER TO FLIRT BACK!

nine

Elora: Every family has a gay cousin

Kit: I don't have a gay cousin

Elora: Maybe you're the gay cousin

Kit: Holy shit, I'm the gay cousin

ten

Madmartigan: Kids, I'm sorry I had to leave, and wasn't there for you both growing up. I an so proud of the people you have become. Kit, you are one of the finest, bravest knights this world has ever known. Kit: Thanks, dad.

Madmartigan: And Airk... you've got great hair, son.

Airk: (overcome with emotions) Thanks, dad.

Willow: Really?

Jade: He's always had really low expectations.

Elora: Tell me about it. Before we started dating I once gave him a cupcake I stole from the kitchens. He thought I'd made him a birthday cake. He cried.

eleven

Elora: I give up. I am so tired.

Kit: Get the emergency supply!

Jade: *carries Graydon and places him in front of Elora*

Graydon: *smiles*

Elora: AND I’M BACK BABY, LET'S GOOO

twelve

Airk: Hey, Kit? Can I get some dating advice?

Kit: Just because I'm with Jade doesn't mean I know how I did it.

Kit: *turns to Jade looking curious* How did I do it?

Jade: I think it’s definitely the hair.

Kit: *smuggly smirking*

thirteen

Kit, messaging Jade at 2 am: lmfao

Kit: guess what?

Jade: Bitch, with the way you live, I have no fucking idea.

fourteen

Kit: Look at that! The statues smirking at me.

Elora: You’re right, that’s weird.

Boorman: It’s art, it isn’t weird.

Graydon *turns to Jade*: Why isn't the statue smirking at me?

Jade: It isn't smirking at anyone, they're all just imagining it.

Graydon: Three of us saw it, Jade. How do you explain that?

Jade: *points at Elora* Sleep deprivation, *points at Kit* Severe paranoia, *points at Boorman* Delusional personality disorder.

fifteen

Kit: Let's watch Sharkboy and Lavagirl.

Jade: Okay.

kit: And make out during the scary parts.

Jade: Th-

Jade: The scary parts.

Jade: Of Sharkboy and Lavagirl.

sixteen

Jade: You know what I learned from years of being friends with Kit?

Graydon: There's no such thing as too idiotic?

Elora: Never let your friends know for sure if you like them?

Boorman: Always hold a grudge?

Kit: I don’t know what you learned, but I learned to never steal your socks.

seventeen

Airk: Oh you travelled across most of the known world and nearly died multiple times to reach me? What a wonderful treat! Oh, those guys who've been trying to kill you the last few months? They're fine, don't worry about them, they're my mates. They still want to kill you though. Let me give you the most awkward hugs in existence and be really creepy and spacey then start spouting the most cultish speech ever.

Kit: What are you on?

Airk: Wyrm's milk.

Kit: Forget I asked.

eighteen

Elora: Sonetimes I drink milk straight out of the container.

Kit: The cow?!?!?!

Elora: What?

Jade: Elora, W H Y?

Nineteen

Kit: *Kicks the door down looking panicked*

Jade: What did you do?

Kit: Nobody died.

Jade: WHAT KIND OF ANSWER IS THAT?!?

twenty

Kit: Jade, you deserve an award for putting up with me.

Jade: You are my reward, Kit.

[meanwhile]

Boorman: Scorpia, you deserve an award for putting up with me.

Scorpia: Hell yeah I do; you're a real bitch sometimes. Scratch that, all the time.

[uloelu]

Location: Windslar, Windenburg

(transcript under the cut)

Episode 1 | Previous | Next

Hello again! Long time no see. Work got crazy these last few weeks, and I had little time to get this episode out. Thankfully, I pulled through. I'm excited to show y'all the second episode of the Fosters series! Part 2 drops tomorrow.

Scene 1 - 28 Windslar

Haven (checking her phone): 7:00AM. Spectacular. Happy birthday to me.

(heads downstairs, scowling) And Chloe’s making breakfast. That’s just great. Oatmeal pancakes and protein shakes for everyone.

Josh: Hey, isn’t today your birthday?

Haven: Nothing gets past you.

Josh: Well, I hope your day improves. And I like your t-shirt.

Haven: Thanks. I stole it off some guy back in San Myshuno. Never got a chance to actually read Thrasher.

Josh: Really? I’ve got a couple of older copies that I brought with me. Consider it my gift to you.

Haven: You don’t have to do that.

Josh: Relax, it’s your birthday. I hardly read them, anyway.

Haven: Damn it. I’ll have to get them after school. Cassandra’s waiting for me out front.

Chloe: You’ll miss my pancakes...

Haven: I’ll live.

Scene 2 - Copperdale Prep

Cassandra (sheepishly): So...I probably should have checked to see if Dunkin’ was actually open before dragging you out of your house early...

Haven: Renovations. Shit happens. I’ll just eat a full lunch.

Luna (kissing Malcolm Landgraab): Missed you last night, Mackie. Thought you were going to come over.

Haven: Nevermind. I’ve lost my appetite.

Haven (going about her day): I’ve had worse birthdays, honestly. Nothing beats having glass bottles thrown at your head while trying to put a toddler to sleep. Stuffy uniforms and boring classes are heaven compared to that.

Wes (walking into class late): Another detention, ladies and gents. I’m thinking about going for the world record.

Haven: As much as I hate to admit it, Windenburg and Copperdale Prep are kind of growing on me.

Mostly thanks to Wes and Cassandra. Though Wes did invite his...situation to the get-together our foster parents are throwing for me later tonight, so he’s on my temporary shit list.

Haven (playing piano in a restaurant after school): I even managed to convince Solstice to let me practice on their grand piano on my days off from work. They think they’re cheating me by getting free performances. I just want the experience.

Scene 3 - 28 Windslar

(The birthday is a low-key affair at the Brookestone-Walker residence. All the foster kids are in attendance, along with Cassandra and Morgan.)

Haven: And fine, Morgan isn’t bad at all. She’s friends with Cassandra and Wolfgang, so she has to be cool. I guess it just feels weird to watch Wes focus his attention on someone else, even though I’m not interested in him at all.

Morgan (telling a story to Wes and Haven): You should have seen the look on her face! She had no idea we knew her favorite...

Haven: He’s like family to me now.

It’s strange learning how to fit into this new, makeshift family. I feel like I’m constantly saying the wrong thing. I’ve never cared so much about how people see me. I don’t know if I want them to like me...I just don’t want them to hate me.

(Audreyanna hands Haven a gift.)

Haven: I didn’t think you were going to get me anything.

Audreyanna: You only turn 17 once, Haven. I remember that age very well. I hope it’s your best yet.

Haven: Thank you.

Scene 4 - Outside 28 Windslar

(Morgan and Wes sneak outside.)

Morgan: I’ve been trying to figure you out for a while now.

Wes: And?

Morgan: And I’ve realized that it’s pointless. I simply am never going to get you.

Wes: I doubt that.

Morgan: You never give me a straight answer. You talk a big game but haven’t made a move. How are you so sure?

Wes: You already have me. There’s nothing more to get.

(They kiss.)

Morgan: We’re right in front of your house, you know.

Wes: Don’t overthink it.

[retrieve-the-kraken]

Am I exaggerating for getting upset about this?

This is precisely why I don’t like celebrating my birthday with people. I don’t like to be the center of attention, I don’t like to ask for things, and I don’t like people to make a fuss about me.

This year I planned to go away, but circumstances with a work project made me unsure if I’d be able to have a holiday on the week of my birthday.

We did finish, but I didn’t book anything just in case. And I was tired and I felt like I just needed to recharge.

So I stayed home this week, and I just planned to do things on my birthday. Random things that I like, all by myself.

But my family insisted that we should go out to eat to celebrate. My friends wanted to celebrate with me too, but I’m celebrating with them tomorrow, which I prefer because it’s not really my birthday anymore.

People don’t get that I don’t like celebrating my birthday: it’s not that I don’t even want to acknowledge that it’s my birthday, it’s just that I think it’s weird, honestly, to have people do things for me on this day just because I was born (something that I had absolutely no say in). My birthday is technically just for me. I’m here, I’m gonna do something special for myself, nobody else needs to be involved. I don’t know if that’s weird, bur that’s just how I think.

So I managed to convince my family that I didn’t want to go out to eat, that we could just have a low key thing in my sister’s house, with some extended family, very small. And I didn’t want any special meal, I just wanted pizza from this one place, and I decided that I wanted to drink Aperol Spritz and that I wanted blueberry pie instead of cake. I even made the pie myself, last night, I bought the Aperol and the Prosecco and oranges, and all my sister had to do was order the pizzas. I mentioned the one restaurant specifically. They make excellent pizzas.

This morning it was rainy and perfect, I slept in. Then I went to a museum and loved it. Then I had an excellent lunch at one of my new favorite places. I got home, got ready, headed to my sister’s. They made me Aperol Spritz.

Then the pizzas got there, and they were from this place that I detest, not the place I requested. I asked why they hadn’t ordered from that place, they said there didn’t seem to be any delivery available from any of the apps (our equivalents to DoorDash, UberEats, etc). I said the place has it’s own delivery service. My sister said she didn’t know that, so they ordered from this place. They didn’t even ask me for an alternative that I would like too. I really hate that pizza. I couldn’t even take one bite. It’s disgusting (to me, not necessarily to others).

I was already upset, because it was such a simple thing that I asked, and they got it wrong and didn’t even try to problem-solve it. They could have asked me if I liked that place, they could have asked me why I wanted that other place specifically, they could have asked anything. But they just ordered whatever was most convenient. They just teased me mercilessly about being too picky, that I was making too big a deal. Even my niece tore into me (my ten-year-old niece, whom I recall crying once over a salad her mum made her full of ingredients that she didn’t like, was accusing me of being too picky…). I said that I had only asked for this one specific thing, and they still made me feel really ridiculous about being upset over the pizza place choice. Then my brother-in-law ordered three more pizzas from another place that I do like, but by then I wasn’t hungry anymore, I didn’t want pizza anymore, it was later and I wasn’t hungry anymore, but he still ordered them, and then he continued to tease me about it. They all did. They all made a fuss. I don’t fucking like people making a fuss.

By the time the new pizza arrived, I was no longer fucking hungry, but I still had to eat at least a couple of slices, because they ordered them specifically for me… and I felt guilty and awful…

And of course I feel ridiculous, I know it’s such an insignificant problem to have. But… I shouldn’t have been made to feel so awful on my fucking birthday, that I didn’t even want to celebrate in the first place. I thought I was doing them a favor by making things very simple and low key, and I’m grateful that they want to celebrate me and everything…

This is the kind of thing that reinforces the idea that maybe I’m a fucking nuisance to my family, that I can meek and be ridiculed or I can be assertive and be ridiculed too, that I maybe do hyper fixate on things and that they will never understand or try to understand me or my feelings, and so why express my feelings if they’re going to either be made fun of or dismissed anyway…

Anyway, at least my pie was really good.

Next year I’m fucking off to Scandinavia and going to Sweden for Eurovision and spending my birthday in the middle of a fjord and not dealing with this kind of shit.

I love my family, and I like them; they’re not perfect obviously, but sometimes they can be really tone-deaf when it comes to me…