#i like enneagrams too but its also not enough for me

[chrlotpony]

idgaf is you hate mbti as typo or the mbti caricatures, I love mbti cuz shit is fun and its pseudoscience!!! it's not that deep!!!

"just take the big 5" "nooo do the big 5 instead it's so much better" NO.

[elaho]

Stardew Valley MBTI x Enneagram: Leah

Following my last post about the Stardew marriage candidates and their MBTI types, I've been learning more about Enneagram, how it pairs with MBTI, and how it changes some of the typical characteristics of each type.

The Enneagram and MBTI complement each other wonderfully, providing greater depth and understanding of how a person interacts with the world [Cognitive Functions] and their motivations why [Core Desire/Core Fear].

Here are my thoughts on Leah's MBTI and Enneagram pairing.

Leah - INFP 4w5: “The Bohemian”

“INFP 4w5s are very independent people. They are often reserved and detached from their surrounding. INFP 4w5 may also be interested in arts and music. This type is often on a quest to find their true selves. Thus, they might struggle with self-identity. There is often a conflict between logic and emotion.” – Personality Hunt

Leah’s Core Desire: To be unique and independent

"The basic desire of the INFP 4w5 is to be unique and independent. To achieve this, INFP 4w5 tends to do things they find fulfilling. Feeling satisfied and passionate about their life appeals to them the most." - Personality Hunt

“So why did you become a farmer?”  Answer: It's more "real" than living in the city “That's pretty much the reason I came here, too!”

"One Summer, it was so hot during the night that I got out of bed and jumped into the river! I hope no one saw me!”

“I don't make art for money. It's just an urge that I have.”

Leah’s Core Fear: To be ordinary and insignificant

"The basic fear of the INFP 4w5 is to be ordinary and insignificant. They simply do not want to be like everyone else or find themselves stuck in a profession they are not passionate about. INFP 4w5 are afraid of not finding themselves." - Personality Hunt

Leah's desire to be unique doesn't mean she wants to be unique for its own sake. Her strong Introverted Feeling [Fi] need to be authentic coincides with her desire for individuality, to be true to herself regardless of external pressure or expectations.

This doesn't mean she's immune to pushing against the grain to stand out from the crowd or resist control, but it's much more of an internal battle between who she is and how she can contribute in her own special way.

"We had an apartment together, back in the city. I did odd jobs during the day and spent all night working on art projects... we barely made enough to scrape by. He was always nagging me to go back to school and study business or medicine... something with a lot of money in it.

I guess the idea was to save up for a normal life. You know... a house in the suburbs, kids, PTA meetings... that sort of thing. I wasn't ready for that kind of life, Farmer... I had to leave. So I came here to pursue my dream of being an artist.”

“But what if no one likes my sculptures? I'd be crushed...I'll have to think about it.”

----------------------------------------------------------------------

How Enneagram 4w5 changes typical INFP behaviour:

New Strengths

1. More Logical

"INFPs are feelers by their very nature. While this is true, INFP 4w5s will use more logic when making decisions.

Some INFP 4w5s might use logic when dealing with a particular set of problems and emotions when dealing with others.

However, you can just sense that they are not as emotional as [typical INFPs]." - Personality Hunt

Leah approaches life from a much more logical angle than most INFPs. However, emotion is still important in understanding and navigating the world. The fusion of both logic and emotion gives Leah a more balanced and holistic perspective when facing challenges or analysing scenarios.

Examples:

"I hate to be blunt, but if we don't treat nature with respect, our grandchildren will be doomed. Don't you think so?"

"... I just wouldn't have been happy back there [living with Kel]. It was better for both of us... to end an unsustainable relationship while we were still young and flexible.”

“Maybe you're right... Humans are selfish creatures. I don't know. I probably shouldn't dwell on it. We all have to make hard choices from time to time.”

“I made a little wood sculpture today, but it was so ugly I threw it into the fire. I think to become a great artist, you have to be critical of your own work.”

2. More Detached and Aloof

INFPs are naturally introverted, but because of the INFP 4w5s wing, they may be even more introverted than others. They often need extra time to process and digest their inner thoughts and emotions, making them appear aloof and indifferent.

It's not that they don't care, they just have a lot on their minds that must be contended with before they can be fully present with someone else. INFP 4w5s can appear to be INTPs in this respect.

Examples:

"Please don't feel like you have to spend all your time with me now that we're dating... I know you're a busy person!”

"Do you ever walk out into the forest... Pause... And simply enjoy the beauty of nature? It's easy to forget how incredible this world actually is...” “Sometimes, a strange feeling comes over me. My head becomes totally empty... and I feel completely at peace, even blissful. Hey, now! It has nothing to do with drinking wine!”

“Good morning! I got up early and did some mushroom hunting. Here, take one. Searching for mushrooms is like going on a treasure hunt. It's a lot of fun.”

3. Drawn to Academics

"The presence of wing 5 makes this type really curious. Thus, they often find themselves drawn to academics. Again, this largely depends on the strength of their wing. It is not a given that every INFP 4w5 will like academics. However, they certainly have some sort of inclination towards it." - Personality Hunt

Leah isn't interested in traditional academics like philosophy or mathematics but in various painting techniques and historical art styles. She also has books related to foraging and natural sciences in her cottage library. Her quest for knowledge is much more practical than it is theoretical.

Examples:

“You can use a tapper to harvest syrups and other useful liquids directly from trees. It's a slow process, but the result can be quite valuable.”

"The flowing water keeps my house a little bit cooler in summer. I can't tolerate heat very well.”

"Hey, Farmer... what style do you think I should do? I'm up for anything...Hmm... not my usual style, but I'll give it a shot. I'd better switch to acrylic paint for this one...” "Now, don't forget the techniques I taught you... broad strokes, hold the brush like so...”

4. Abstract Ideas and Endless Theories

The combination of an INFP's Extroverted Intuition [Ne] and their type 5 wing makes INFP 4w5s absolute suckers for abstract theories and ideas.

INFP 4w5s love having deep conversations and discussions; they are fascinated with endless possibilities and potential and can go on for hours and hours about them.

Examples:

“The shape of the waves here is awe inspiring. I wonder if I could ever capture that sort of formlessness in a sculpture.”

"There's nothing wrong with [natural wood]... I think there's lots of beauty to be found in raw, untouched nature! But as a human, I'm also interested in how we shape and interpret the world around us... I guess what I'm saying is that I'm interested in 'art'.”

"Do you ever wonder what it's like to be a different person? Do our thoughts manifest in a similar way, or is it radically different? Don't mind me, I think about weird things sometimes...”

"The flow of time is so delicate... even the tiniest decision changes the future forever."

5. The Need to be Self-Sufficient with Finances

"INFP 4w5 wants to be self-sufficient. Thus, they crave having their careers and handling their finances. They do not just want to handle their finances. They want to be great at it. Because of this need, they will avoid running into endless debts.

To them, being self-sufficient is one way they show how unique they are. They also don’t want to settle for just any job or career.

For INFP 4w5, it’s all about what they are passionate about and love." - Personality Hunt

Examples:

"I sold enough art at that show to get by for another year... that's all I needed!"

“If my art continues to sell online like it has, I'll be able to keep making art forever. That's always been my dream.”

"Maybe you're right... my life would've been a lot easier if I had stayed. Maybe it's better to be practical and realistic... for all I know my art career will never pan out and I'll live my final years in squalor.”

New Weaknesses

1. More Isolated

"INFPs enjoy their alone time. They love to spend these moments reading a book or just being alone. INFP 4w5s take this to another level. They can stay alone for long periods.

When the INFP dark side is strong, this can be a big problem. INFPs are one of the types that have issues with anxiety and depression.

Being isolated simply does not help this situation." - Personality Hunt

Leah spends a lot of time alone by herself. She lives alone in a small cottage outside of town and can be found painting or drawing deep in the forest or isolated tidepools.

While she does enjoy her time by herself, her self-isolating tendencies could lead to more serious mental health problems if left unchecked.

Examples:

“I've realized I'm happier by myself. So just leave me be.”

“Hello, neighbor. We both live outside of town. Does that mean something?”

"It's simpler to be friends with the trees. They don't have much to say.”

2. Less Considerate

"INFPs, in general, are known to be the sweetest people you can find. However, INFP 4w5s are a bit different. They are more likely to avoid people’s emotional troubles.

They are more likely to avoid people and the issues they bring, like the plague. This might make them seem emotionless or inconsiderate of people’s issues.

However, INFP 4w5s are still INFPs. So, deep down, they care more than you think." - Personality Hunt

Examples:

"Hi. Oh, you want to talk. Farming seems like a very rewarding profession. You get to create delicious food for everyone! You're probably busy. Sorry.”

"I found some wild fruits this morning! Sorry, I don't have any left. Keep looking, I'm sure you'll find something."

3. Self-Absorbed

"INFP 4w5s often seem very self-absorbed. They are often thinking about their interests and their future. Thus, they might not seem to care much about others and what they are facing.

This is largely because of their type 4. Thus, INFP 4w5 might seem like INFJs in this respect. While they are often self-absorbed, this does not necessarily mean that they don’t care. They just want to [understand] themselves." - Personality Hunt

INFPs have Extroverted Sensing [Se] blindspot, meaning they can have difficulty being aware of their external physical surroundings in the moment, including the emotions and reactions of others.

This can make them more clumsy or daydreamy, but this 'detachment from external reality' can also allow them to put all their energy and focus into a performance or activity.

Leah can be self-absorbed at times, but her self-absorption doesn't necessarily come at the expense of others' needs or emotions. She merely "feels" life deeply and seeks to understand what those thoughts and emotions indicate about herself and the world around her.

Examples:

"I guess everyone in town was scared of that strange rain? I had no idea... I just thought it was incredible!”

4. More Stubborn

"INFP 4w5s are much more stubborn than your normal INFP. This usually shows when their values are tested. INFP 4w5s will often resist any attempt to control them or make them do things that don’t sit right with them.

The level of resistance might be surprising to people who don’t really know them well." - Personality Hunt

Examples:

“I'm still fuming about the picnic... what a weirdo! Let's never talk about... that person... ever again.”

"Kel...How many times do I have to tell you? I don't want to come back to the city! Stop calling me... I don't want to hear from you anymore!”

------------------------------------------------------------------

The INFP 4w5 Female

"There’s a valid reason to consider the INFP 4w5 female in closer detail. In the world we live in, societal beliefs often shape people’s lives. One personality that silently fights against the norms and beliefs of society is the INFP 4w5 female." - Personality Hunt

1. Sexual Preferences

“INFP 4w5 females are unique in their sexual preferences. Unlike other enneagram types that might be more drawn to one particular preference, things are different with them.

You’ll find them all over the place. Some will even identify as asexual. This is possibly down to their need to be different or unique. They also understand themselves on a much deeper scale.” – Personality Hunt While many of the other bachelors and bachelorettes have more self-exploratory dialogue depending on the farmer’s gender [such as “I’ve never felt this way about _______ before”], Leah’s dialogue by contrast seems to indicate that she is much more aware of her sexuality independent of the farmer.

Her story seems to diverge depending on which gender the farmer is:

If the farmer is a boy, Leah learns to overcome her fear and distrust of being in a long-term relationship with a man again. Some may suggest that Leah has a more solidified preference for women; however, based on the dialogue differences between male and female players, I believe Leah's choice to be with the male farmer isn't about her sexuality but about overcoming her distrust of men. The pain of being trapped in a traditional lifestyle she didn't want for herself comes back if the male farmer starts to show a sexual interest in Leah in her 2-heart event. These memories trigger her core fear of not being 'unique' enough if she's in a heterosexual relationship /traditional family again, causing her to lash out, calling the farmer a "pig" and kicking him out of her cottage.

However, if the farmer is a girl, Leah's desire is to assert her independence and 'unique' sexuality away from her ex, from which she moves on to the female farmer relatively easily without the same fears or obstacles; she doesn't chastise the farmer for their sexual advance in the 2-heart event but rather confirms their mutual sexual preference.

For these reasons, Leah's heartbreak dialogue is much more 'soft' towards the female farmer than the male farmer:

Male Farmer Dialogue

[Creepy Kiss] “You pig! Get out!”

[Multiple Girlfriends] "I... I thought you were different than other men...”

"KEL: Seriously, Leah... What are you doing out here with this simple-minded bumpkin?” “Farmer's a better man than you in every respect!”

Female Farmer Dialogue

[Creepy Kiss] “Oh! You're...? Me too. That's good to know.”

[Multiple Girlfriends] “You tricked all of us into thinking we loved you... You're horrible...”

"KEL: Seriously, Leah... What are you doing out here with this simple-minded bumpkin?” “Farmer's a better person than you in every respect!”

Stardew Valley leaves the romance candidates’ sexual orientation up to player interpretation [as do most dating sims]; however, like Alex's story, I believe Leah's story has a slightly different meaning on which gender the player chooses for the farmer.

2. Autonomy

“They need to be independent. With males, this is not usually pronounced because most males tend to be drawn to masculinity. However, INFP 4w5 females will be silently loud about independence.

Backed by their Fi, they’ll make their own decisions and stick with them. This is one reason to admire them.” – Personality Hunt

"Kel...How many times do I have to tell you? I don't want to come back to the city! Stop calling me... I don't want to hear from you anymore!”

“I don't make art for money. It's just an urge that I have.”

3. Creative

“All INFPs are creative. However, INFP 4w5 females are just on another level. Backed by super warmth and a natural nurturing spirit, their creativity just hits differently. With enough discipline, it can create a lot of career opportunities for them.” – Personality Hunt

"Good morning, Farmer. I've planted these in a little pot out back... I grew that with great love and attention. Enjoy it.”

“Do you ever get cold in that farmhouse of yours? Stop by my cabin if you want to huddle under one of my quilts and drink cider.”

"I wonder if I could make a collage out of dried leaves? They're just so colorful... I can't help but think of the potential for art projects.”

"I haven't named this one, yet. She started out as an exercise in human anatomy, but I ended up seeing her through to completion. Her expression is intentionally unclear... is she embarrassed, amused, pained? I'll leave that for you to decide.”

4. Intense

“INFP 4w5 females come with a lot of intensity. It’s easy to miss because most times, they are even more introverted than their male counterparts.

However, getting to know them will expose you to their rich intense world. If you’re not careful, you might even be overwhelmed.” – Personality Hunt

I’m not a 4w5, but as an INFP female, I can tell you with certainty that we can go from 0 to 100 REAL QUICK! However, most of us know how intense our inner worlds can be, so we do our best to ‘temper’ our intensity to prevent scaring people away.

But know that there’s no greater compliment from an INFP than to be brought into their rich inner world; we don’t share that secret part of ourselves with just anyone.

"It's simpler to be friends with the trees. They don't have much to say.”

“Do you ever wonder what it's like to be a different person? Do our thoughts manifest in a similar way, or is it radically different? Don't mind me, I think about weird things sometimes...”

"If you ever find any interesting looking driftwood, I could use it. It would be special that you gave it to me.”

"The trees have been begging for this rain... I'm happy for them."

"Did I ever tell you... when you first moved here I had a dream that we'd be together someday."

"Sometimes it's hard not to believe in destiny... the fact that I decided to move here, and that we found each other. It could've gone entirely differently at any point."

---------------------------------------------------------------------

Conclusion

Leah is one of the most beloved bachelorettes in the Stardew Valley community, and it's not difficult to see why.

She is a warm and empathetic person who cares deeply about the natural world and lives in harmony with her environment. She is a dreamer who [like the farmer] wants bigger and better things than to follow the corporate rat race and live a miserable life without any real meaning or purpose.

She leaves everything she knows behind: her steady job, her apartment in the city, and her ex-boyfriend/girlfriend, all to pursue her dream of becoming a real artist. She dreams of pursuing art somewhere she feels connected to people and nature and can contribute something special in her own way:

“I first visited this valley as a little girl, while on vacation with my parents. I knew I had to come back some day… This place has great artistic potential!" "Hmmm… interesting. I guess that could set the wheels in motion to making Pelican Town a true art destination…"

Although she is afraid that her artistic dreams will result in devastating failure, with the love and support of the farmer - first as a friend, then as something more - Leah takes the leap to showcase her artistic talents to the world, knowing that no matter what happens, the farmer will be there to give her the unconditional love and support she's always needed.

"You know, I just realized something. Even if my art career is a flop, I'll always have a friend to catch me on the way down."

Do you agree that Leah is an INFP 4w5? If not, what type do you think she is? Let me know your thoughts in the comments :)

--------------------------------------------------------------------- References:

Personality Hunt: INFP 4w5 - The Complete Guide

[redstringraven]

an excruciatingly long ramble about the '03 turtles and the enneagram 🐢❤ pt2

[ intro + disclaimers post ] [ pt 3 - leo ] [ pt 4 - don ] [ pt 5 - mikey ]

raph, 8 with a 7 wing

intro + why raph

welcome to the first of these giant posts. i’m. not kidding, you’re gonna click ‘read more’ and see why this series is titled “an excruciatingly long ramble”. i’ve done my best to section it off so you might have an easier time finding your place again if you need or want to take breaks. there’s no way i’m going to cover everything there is to talk about, so i might write and link ‘addendums’ to these posts later on as i think of things.

since raph is the first one, his might be a bit longer than the other three because there are a few enneagram terms that i’ll define as we go. you can then take those with you to the upcoming three posts. so please bear with me, grab a snack, a drink, some nice background music, and WE RIDE.

• . • . •

i wanted to start this project with raph because i feel like we start the series at his lowest/unhealthiest point.

only four episodes into the show (meet casey jones, s1ep4) we see him lose control of his temper in a serious way: he attacks mikey. throughout the rest of the episode he's forced to ‘face himself’ in casey and start monitoring his anger.

while we see him continue to grapple with his anger throughout the series, this is his worst moment. he has nowhere to go but up. in contrast, we see leo in probably his healthiest state of mind at the beginning of the series only to be at his worst in the first half of season 4. but back to raph; we'll have time for leo later.

as the series continues, we see glimpses of this temper rear its head again, with some examples being at the end of their encounter with karai in city at war (s2ep16) or during his fight with traximus in the battle nexus (s2ep24). in these instances, we get a close-up shot of his eyes narrowing and, with traximus, the area around them darkening. this was something that was specifically focused on during s1ep4 whenever he began to lose control. the loss of control is still THERE, it’s just less frequent now. he’s growing.

i think it’s also important to highlight that mikey ribs on him during the battle nexus (s2ep25) not unlike how he does in s1ep4, too. sure, they might be in an environment that shields them from danger of serious injuries, but i think it says a LOT that mikey’s comfortable provoking raph to the degree he does. raph’s acted on his apology, has done work, and mikey knows this. he's watched him do it. it's time already to be The Worst™ again.

but enough about why i chose raph to go first; let's cover the basics of an 8.

bare basics of the 8

as stated in the introductory post, the enneagram focuses heavily on the why and the motivation behind your behavior.

8s are one of the three assertive types (along with 3s and 7s), and they’re a part of the gut triad (made of 8s, 9s, and 1s). assertives can be described as moving 'against people'. they respond to stress or difficulty by building up, reinforcing, or inflating their ego; they will expand rather than back down or seek protection. assertive types will often have issues processing their feelings.

the gut triad may also be referred to as the ‘doing’ or the ‘instinct’ triad, as they respond instinctively and tend to be honest and direct in their self expression. i’ve also seen it referred to as the ‘anger’ triad since these types tend to have problems with aggression and repression, and they can carry a great deal of rage. types in the gut triad seek autonomy and are concerned with resistance and control of their environment. an 8 externalizes it. a 9 forgets it. and a 1 internalizes it. there’s a lot more information about the triads out there, but this is what we’ll take with us for now.

an 8’s basic fear is that of being harmed or controlled by others, of violation.

their basic desire is to protect themselves and determine their own course in life.

they believe they’ll be okay so long as they are strong and in control of their situation.

childhood take-aways

at an early age, 8s begin to understand that in order to keep their environments, themselves, and the people they care about from being hurt, they have to have willpower, persistence, and endurance. 8s often “grow up too quickly” and focus on survival issues. they’ve picked up that “might makes right”.

we don’t get to see a lot of the boys’ youth, but we’re given an idea in the first episode, things change (s1ep1), of the perspective they were raised under. i’ll be referring back to that throughout this section of each post. master splinter states:

“your path in life will not be an easy one. the outside world will not be a friendly place for you. you four are different in ways the surface dwellers would never understand. to survive, you must master these skills i teach you: the powers of stealth and secrecy. you must become kage, shadow warriors, and you must never be discovered by the outside world.”

8s ask themselves “how can i--and the few people i care about--survive in a cruel, uncaring world?”. it’s possible that this way of thinking was only solidified by movies they saw growing up, or even witnessing what casey was going through during the lesson (s3ep13). if the outside world isn’t friendly to what it considers ‘normal’, then surely it won’t be kind to what’s different.

8s were often independent, adventuresome, and assertive as children. they'd be found running ahead of the pack. they’re the kid who will stand up to the playground bully without flinching. they might have questioned authority, trusting themselves more than most adults, which lead to being punished frequently.

8s often find themselves in the role of the scapegoat, the “black sheep” or problem child. raph even calls attention to this, himself, in his ‘03 profile: referring to himself as “the angry young man” and “the dark one”.

it's brief, but i think we get a glimpse of this in s2ep23 at the start of the battle nexus arc: master splinter starts to express his disappointment in leo for following him to the nexus, but raph steps in immediately to shoulder the blame. he could have stayed quiet but, no. he’s the ‘problem child’ here. he can take the heat.

raph as an 8

now that we've touched on the basics of an 8, as well as a few things they may have picked up early in life, let's take a look at raph and his 8.

8s can sometimes be nicknamed: ‘the challenger’, ‘the leader’, ‘the protector’, ‘the provider’, ‘the entrepreneur’, ‘the maverick’, or ‘the rock’.

i’ll continue to refer to raph by his numerical type because, while the nicknames that grant a surface idea of their behavior, most users of the enneagram prefer to avoid descriptive labels. one 8 might feel being called ‘the provider’ suits them while another 8 might not see themselves in that label at all. nicknames are quick summaries/general ideas, but it’s good practice to use the number type itself.

an ‘average’ 8, in terms of their mental and spiritual health, tends to be a steamroller rather than a diplomat and have a black and white way of thinking: people are good or bad, an opinion is right or wrong, the answer is yes or no, etc. this isn’t to say raph can’t acknowledge nuance (far from it), but rather that 8s believe not having clarity or absolute certainty about your position and viewpoints represents weakness or--worse--cowardice. the rest of us have opinions, the 8 has facts. they don’t have a lot of patience for indecisive people, and they might use aggression to emotionally protect themselves. many exhibit an abundance of common sense.

8s are extraordinarily tough, physically and mentally. they can absorb a great deal of punishment without batting an eye. raph has a tendency to be the one catching blows for his brothers or guarding them during fights. we can refer back to being the 'problem child' as well; he can handle the heat. he’s an anchor who keeps his brothers grounded when worries spike, and he tends to be blunt, to the point, and possibly the most ‘world-wise’ out of the four.

8s want to be loved but often feel rejected or like misfits, which becomes more evident in their “take it or leave it” attitude as they get older. you can accept them as they are, or you can get out. they attempt to protect themselves by rejecting others first, and they might develop a fear of dependency. the “i don’t need you guys” sort of mentality. during tales of leo (s1ep19), raph even says “who needs you?” to leo before he tells his story.

it likely goes without saying that raph, like many 8s, admires strength. since their basic fear revolves so much around maintaining what power and control they have, 8s are the types of people who can walk into a room and immediately know who holds the most ‘power’. they’ll just as likely be deciding whether or not that power is deserved, and if they’ll be with or against it. it probably took raph like, what, five seconds to realize that one big alien was the head honcho in the big house (s2ep3) and he took them out first excuse he got.

raph wants people to challenge him back; an 8 can quickly lose respect for you if you’re unwilling to stand toe-to-toe with them (even if the 8 disagrees with you, they'll respect that you held your ground). they also want the truth. they don’t want you to ‘protect’ them from unpleasant details or facts. if they don't have all the information--no matter how harsh or unpleasant it may be--they can't control the situation or hope to reach their desired outcome.

let’s elaborate a bit on what the hell a ‘wing’ is. the enneagram is depicted as a wheel--kind of like a clock, if that helps you picture it without a visual aid (albeit i’ll link one here; ignore the arrows for now, we'll return to them).

a type’s wing are the two numbers that neighbor it on the wheel. the wings for an 8 are: 7 and 9. when someone says they’re a type “with a wing”, that means that they feel influenced in some way by that neighboring type. since the enneagram looks at ‘why’ and motives, you might find that the wing you lean toward more might fluctuate or change as you grow and experience life.

i'm confident raph is an 8w7, meaning his enneagram type is an 8 but he takes influence from 7. delightful, then, that mikey’s a 7. i think it’s a nice little way to tie them together when it’s time for Shenanigans™.

8s who have 7 wings are sometimes called ‘the independents’. along with being one of the most energetic and sociable types, people of this subtype tend to be risk-takers, adventurous, and combine the 8’s need for intensity with the 7’s love of anticipation. they’re practical, pragmatic, competitive, and not concerned with pleasing others, but also tend to be lead by their feelings, resulting in them being impatient and impulsive. they might be more confrontational and aggressive and are less likely to back down from a fight than an 8w9.

i remember seeing a link to one of those character… personality across all quizzes type of wikis somewhere and if memory serves raph was listed as an 8w9. i can’t help but wonder if that decision was made because it would give him two types on the instinct/gut triad, verses an 8w7 where his core type is on the instinct/gut triad, but his wing is in the thinking/head triad. we’ll discuss that one more when we get to don and mikey. *murmuring from the audience* yes, mikey is on the thinking/head triad. he’s actually fully on it, wing and all. *more murmuring from the audience* i’ll get to it, i’ll get to it.

but, no, 8s with a 9 wing have an almost deceptively laid back quality to them and are much more willing to be open and affectionate around their loved ones. 8w9s are sometimes nicknamed ‘the bear’ for that reason and, while highly protective and aggressive in being so, i don’t really think of raph when i think of that (you can see where labels might cause a problem). 8w9s are more willing to let their walls down in safe spaces; raph appears guarded and careful just about every time we see him no matter whose company he’s in. his walls only come down in periods of high emotion and, even then, he’s either reluctant to let them show or tries to hide them immediately after the moment passes, even getting angry that they managed to surface at all.

the wing isn't the only other type that influences your core number, though. let's talk about the other two.

stress & security numbers

as i said at the beginning of this post, raph’s is likely going to be the longest because i’ll be introducing various enneagram terms as we go along that you can apply to the other posts going forward. bear with me, please, this information is going to help in the last three sections of the post.

i stated that the enneagram can be compared to varying colors, or even a color wheel. There can be an infinite different types of red, but they are all still expressions of the same base hue. maybe an orange-red, a violet-red, a pale pink, the list goes on. likewise, the enneagram types take influence from the other types, even ones that wouldn’t be considered their wings. these would be their ‘stress’ and ‘security’ numbers.

‘stress’ and ‘security’ are meant to refer to the current mental health level of the individual, with security representing--as you might have guessed--the healthiest state of mind you can be in and stress being the unhealthier side of that. when a type is in an unhealthier state of mind, they begin to adopt the negative traits of their stress number. vise versa, when in a healthier and secure state of mind, they begin to adopt the positive traits of their security number. you may have noticed on the wheel i linked earlier all those arrows in the center. those point to a type's stress and security. let’s start with raph’s stress number.

raph’s stress number is 5. this means that in a stressed or unhealthy state of mind and spirit, raph begins to show the negative behaviors associated with 5s.

(i love looking at raph and don from the enneagram perspective because it’s a common misconception that don and raph are polar opposites. i think their link in their stress and security numbers illustrates that they have a lot more in common than seen on the surface. because raph’s stress number being 5 means that don’s security number is 8. but more on that when we get to don).

in times of high-stress or low-spirits, 8s will become solitary. they’ll minimize their own comfort, take poor care of themselves and may succumb to insomnia or unhealthy diets. they might spend more time brooding or strategizing to size up a situation than they might actively engage with it. they can become extremely cynical and contemptuous of the beliefs and values of others, nihilistic, and have little hope of reconnecting with themselves or those around them.

i'll cover this more in don's post but for some examples: don, being a 5, will often withdraw to his lab and overwork himself (we can see examples of this in s2ep13 return to the underground, or continuing to push himself despite being sick during the second half of season 4).

when it comes to raph, we have a few examples of the 5’s negative traits showing through in periods where he would be unhealthy mentally and spiritually:

when he realizes his temper’s getting out of hand, he’ll isolate himself and “get some air” (some examples, s1ep4, s1ep24)

he’s the most reluctant to talk to leo during tales of leo (s1ep19), and after his story he separates from the group to stand by the window (while not fully leaving the room to isolate, it’s the farthest he’s willing to go from leo's side)

he spends most of the city at war arc (s2ep14-16) retreating from the conflict, where leo is actively engaging with it

in same as it never was (s3ep21), raph has isolated himself from leo and mikey. he expresses contempt toward leo’s decision to leave master splinter behind. he’s the one who calls the situation “hopeless”.

an 8’s security number is a 2. when in a healthier state of mind, they take on the positive traits of a 2; they have the ability to see potential in people and want to help those people recognize resources and strengths they didn’t know they had. a key word for a healthy 8 is “empowerment”. they would agree with the phrase “give a person a fish and they eat for a day; teach them to fish and they can feed themselves for life”.

8s allowing their 2s to surface means learning to open their hearts to others, letting their guard down and expressing the tenderness they’ve so carefully hid away. it’s important to understand that this movement is not accomplished by imitating the qualities of a 2. an 8 must have greater contact with their hearts and grow comfortable with their gentler feelings. they need to stop equating vulnerability to weakness.

i think some good samples of raph’s 2 coming to the surface might be found:

the exchange with mikey as they're cornered by mousers; “well, it’s been fun, guys” “even me?” “especially you, mikey” (s1ep3)

helping leo recover in monster hunter (s1ep20) and forging a new set of swords with him

every fucking time he gasses don up, but for a specific example, return to the underground (s2ep13)

everything with mrs. morrison in touch and go (s3ep8)… just all of it. don’t even look at me.

throughout all hallows thieves (s4ep12) he’s cheery and even a little nostalgic toward halloweens past. we get an earnest, unguarded laugh out of him.

healthy, integrating 8s make outstanding leaders; they’re able to communicate their profound respect and admiration of others, and they better recognize boundaries and limits--especially their own.

HEY, LET'S TALK ABOUT THAT LEADER THING. i'm sure some of you locked onto that when i listed 'the leader' in the nicknames section.

raph’s temperament and unwillingness to let his 2 surface often gets in the way of him taking a leadership position. he once expressed a desire to be the ‘top turtle’ but made the decision to follow leo. at the end of his flashback during tales of leo, we see him eagerly asking leo what he did to stop the alligator and enthusiastically following him back out of the tunnel. not a smidge of negative feedback in sight. i believe he recognizes and respects leo’s ability to lead, be it by strategy or morals, more than gives into his desire to lead. remember that as far as the 2003 series is concerned: leo is the UNOFFICIAL 'leader'; this is a role he naturally steps into, not a responsibility that was directly assigned to him (i think raph might even be the only one who refers to him as 'fearless leader' or a 'leader' at all, but i could be wrong). 8s don’t need to BE the person in control, they just don’t want to be controlled. they will follow other leaders who are decisive and have earned their respect. to anyone who wants to point out that leo and raph still argue a lot, don't forget about what i said in regards to holding your ground with 8s. they may not like it in the moment, but your ability to hold your ground will be recognized. leo more than often holds his ground when raph challenges him.

(when raph and leo butt heads it’s not because they’re at odds with each other because raph wants to lead or because leo doesn’t consider raph capable of leading, it’s because they’re both stubborn fucking idiots who’re thoroughly convinced their way is the right way; for raph admitting he’s wrong is a show of weakness and surrendering control which is a fear for 8s and for leo it’s a kick to his pride and ability to be ‘good’ which is a fear for 1s. simplifying it down to a power struggle between them drives me up a wall, iN THIS ESSAY I WILL--).

while a small example, a moment from the first notes from the underground episode (s1ep13) has always stuck with me when it comes to raph’s potential and ability to lead: he’s not only the one to throw the grapple to get them across the bridge, but when they’re dangling from a stalagmite after the bridge collapses, he’s the one who gathers them together to do ‘crack the whip’. leo actually doesn’t have any dialogue in that whole sequence; raph’s the one who takes charge and gets them safely to the other side.

it’s also interesting that in cases where leo’s not present AND raph’s in the company of someone similar in behavior to him, his 2 seems to come out on its own. when running around alone with casey, raph is the one reining him in. similar case with godman falcon in across the universe (s3ep20). you could use tyler in lone raph and cub (s1ep24) as another example, but i’m not fully counting that as tyler is like. ten. and stinky.

cardinal sins - 8 and lust

here's term that, on the surface, might appear a bit self-explanatory, but it tends to be a bit more nuanced than that. at least as far as the enneagram is concerned.

every type on the enneagram comes with its own ‘cardinal sin’; you might recognize seven of them from the traditional deadly sins. a type’s cardinal sin is less of a ‘sin’ and more of an almost addictive, involuntary and repeated behavior that we can only be free of when we learn to recognize and manage it. learning to manage your type’s cardinal sin is one of the purposes of the enneagram as a tool.

an 8's cardinal sin is ‘lust’. don’t mistake this for lust purely in its sexual definition; this is ‘lust’ as in the drive and need for intensity. 8s want to feel solid and alive; interactions must be intense, play must be intense--there’s something of a daredevil in 8s as they're looking to experience what life has to offer at 110%. it’s ironic that giving into lust is the antithesis of the control raph’s 8 demands he maintains; lust after a person or object is to be under its power, the opposite of what an 8 truly wants.

i’m sure at least some of you are wondering about ‘wrath’. something that might be important to keep in mind, here, is that 8s reach for rage in place of other emotions; not only is rage easy to access, it’s also an intense and overwhelming emotion. we'll talk about this more when we get to leo, but his 1 makes him a member of the 'anger' triad as well. where raph takes any emotion he feels intensely and replaces it with anger, leo will often take his anger and replace it with a less harsh explanation. but again, we'll get to that.

something else i think is interesting to consider are the cardinal sins associated with the other types that 8s are connected to. in raph’s case, it would be his wing, 7, with his stress and security numbers 5 and 2. the other cardinal sins in his main circle would be gluttony, greed, and pride respectively. when it comes to raph, 'gluttony' makes more sense in application than a 9's 'sloth', which contributes to why i disagree with him having a 9 wing.

sooooo, now that we’ve gone over a lot of information about 8s in general and some samplings of where i see an 8 in raph, i wanna look at three specific points in the series to just kinda pick up and turn around in my hands like a little puzzle box. i’m sorry, i know this is long just--AUGH. i could sit here and run characters through an enneagram lens all day, i'm the worst.

city at war

for me, city at war is a fantastic example of an 8 and a 1 colliding. this is also an arc i see discussed frequently, and often those talking about it have an easy time seeing the perspective of one brother but not the other. for complete disclosure, i’ve always been in raph’s court with this one; even as a kid i'm pretty sure i agreed with raph that they should stay out of the fight (but i’m also a 9, and we tend to avoid conflict of any kind however we can).

we’ll be talking about raph’s perspective here, obviously, and we’ll return to this arc in leo’s post to discuss it from his perspective. remember that one of the enneagram's uses as a tool is to grow in compassion for others and allow us to understand why they act and react the way they do.

a big thing to keep in mind when looking at this arc from raph's perspective as an 8 is that we need to look at the last time they dealt with the foot specifically. while there are five episodes between shredder’s supposed death in secret origins' ending (s2ep8) and city at war beginning (s2ep14), it’s important to consider the sheer weight of everything that lead up to this point and the amount of time passed as those events transpired. remember that an 8’s basic desire is to protect themselves--and the people they’ve come to care about--as well as determine their own course in life. the foot completely uprooted all of that for raph.

we’ll say the shredder strikes back (s1ep17) is the starting point. the boys may have faced the shredder for the first time in shredder strikes (s1ep10), but i don’t think they fully understood what the FUCK they were doing. because they’re fifteen year old boys. with weapons. they think they’re invincible. they’re very stupid, and it's a miracle master splinter hasn't developed like six ulcers.

shredder strikes back is a brutal wake up call to the fact that… NO, ACTUALLY, y'all are pretty fragile. this was the closest they’d probably come to having a family member taken from them. like, all things considered, leo should be dead. he was only “returned” to them on the brink of death to rub salt in the wound. and with the 8’s ability to sniff out who has the most power in a room, i doubt this detail was lost on raph. his brother is only still alive because shredder allowed it.

enough time passes for leo to recover, and we’re right back in new york using the fact we’re ‘dead’ to our advantage to take down shredder once and for all. the next three episodes all occur in the same night. but we did it! we’ve defeated shredder--we thought we’d gained control--but, just kidding, dad’s gone and disappeared.

our search for master splinter over the next few hours sends us to space. the next five episodes are desperately trying to get back to earth and their father. the turtles are in space for a few weeks, but only a few hours have passed on earth.

all of secret origins happens in the span of another few hours and ends with the shredder dying once and for all. he's totally dead, you guys. for real this time. no way in hell he survived that. ...foreshadowing is a literary device whe--

for us, that’s eighteen episodes (which if you were watching back in 2003 in the way the episodes were released would have not only been about eighteen weeks minimum, but the waiting period between two seasons as well). as viewers, it feels like a lot of time has passed. because it has. for them? that is a LOT of shit--again--over a relatively short period of time.

for an 8, this has been a ton of shaking around their control over their course in life. it’s been a huge threat to both their own security and that of the few people they hold dear. going from having to avoid their home and hiding away in april’s apartment, to almost losing leo, to almost losing splinter, to being blasted across the galaxy, discovering their ties to the shredder… but now. FINALLY. shredder is dead. they’re free! ...they should be free to once again determine their own course.

i can only imagine raph is eager to find some semblance of control and grounding again. the world has proven itself in many ways to be cruel and uncaring, just like he’d learned to believe. his 5 probably has him in a bit of a choke hold. and now, as the foot and the mob and the dragons are in a turf war, for SOME GODDAMN REASON his brother--who he almost lost--wants to get involved. raph, usually the first into the ring of conflict, slams the brakes on. this isn’t our fight, and we can just let them weaken each other and eat themselves alive. we gain safety by not involving ourselves, we have control again. to throw ourselves into that is risking another loss. returning to the cardinal sins, the 5’s greed/need to protect their resources and their energy, could very much be in full swing here.

8s and 1s are, unfortunately for everyone else involved, both types who unrelentingly believe they’re correct in an argument. and to back down from said argument could mean submitting to a part of their basic fear. raph’s 8 recognizes this as a moment for them to regain control of not only their own lives, but also as an opening to just let potential future enemies use up resources and wear each other out. and leo’s 1, as we’ll get to, refuses to listen to this on the base that it wouldn’t be right to sit back while people are getting hurt because of an imbalance ‘they caused’.

karai showing up in new york to take shredder’s place leading the foot (giving them a leader and direction again would be empowering them) was the final straw for raph. because what does he do? he isolates. fuck this shit: i’m out.

cards on the table? i’m not too keen that the narrative made it seem like leo was ‘right’ and raph was ‘wrong’, especially with casey stating that “the way he was raised, you fix your mistakes”… like… killing the shredder was a mistake. idk. clumsy choice of words on casey's part or mishandled writing, i'm not fond of it. and raph saying he was being an idiot at the end… honey, sweetie, darling, gravy, you were not being a full fledged idiot. you were both right and you were both wrong and you were both idiots; the situation is complicated and they can be both at once ¯\_(���)_/¯ gray is a value that exists, and you’re both grounded. equality.

anyway. next topic.

darkness within

this will be shorter than the last one because it’s more of a five minute encounter than a span of three episodes with a history, but i think it’s an interesting thing to look at anyway.

i know that from a meta perspective, raph’s nightmare in darkness within (s3ep14) was more a nod to another incarnation, but the fact his fear of becoming anything remotely like the shredder speaks to how self-aware of his anger he might be at this point in the series (note: this is not me saying ch’rell is also an 8; this is a warped fear that came from raph's subconscious, not a direct ‘prediction’ of things to come).

more in-depth views of the enneagram include the levels of development, which is a scale of one to nine how healthy or unhealthy the type is. at their healthiest, 8s can be described as self-surrendering and heroic. self-reliant and strong. self-confident and leading. but at their unhealthiest? 8s can become ruthless and dictatorial. megalomaniacal and terrorizing. sociopathic and destructive. sounds a lot like our favorite chewed up piece of stale cinnamon gum.

raph is aware that his anger--as well as his need to be strong and in control of his situation--could lead him down an even vaguely similar path. we saw glimpses of that, as i said, as early as episode four of the first season. losing grip and control of his temper and attacking mikey. his worst moment. the foot were barely even part of their lives at that point. that happened during what should have been a mundane little training session between brothers, where there was little to no outside influence. while not the shredder exactly, he is aware he has the potential to become something similar if he allows himself to give in to his anger and fears.

the first half of season four and leo’s… gestures vaguely

i think the last thing i want to talk about is the first half of season four and just generally dealing with leo at HIS worst. specifically cousin sid (s4ep1), i, monster (s4ep5), grudge match (s4ep6), samurai tourist (s4ep13), and scion of the shredder (s4ep15).

in cousin sid raph’s reaction to leo’s shift in attitude is, at first, positive. he goes as far as to jokingly state that karai should stab him more often if it means leo’s going to be less hesitant to fight (think his 7 wing was showing itself in that moment tbh; trying to make a joke out of something he shouldn’t have).

by i, monster, i think he’s started to notice that something’s wrong. he holds the others off as he recognizes that leo's fighting something more than just the rat king.

in grudge match, he starts to confront leo on his shift in attitude only to be interrupted by master splinter. by the time we get to samurai tourist, raph’s had it with this 'new leo'. he goes as far as saying leo's "going mental". mikey shuts this down (and boy, we'll get to that), but it's clear that raph's standing with leo has only gotten more and more tense.

i doubt it was intentional, as the writers focused more on leo’s handling of their final confrontation of the shredder, but… with all due respect to master splinter, i don’t agree with him when he later tells leo that his brothers have healed. i don’t think they’re in the unhealthy zone as deep as leo is, but given raph’s more negative and almost accusatory approach to leo’s state, i can’t help but tilt my head and see his 5’s influence beginning to color his perception. he’s having a hard time connecting. digging his heels in, becoming uncompromising. his 2 is hidden away and preventing him from showing vulnerability or gentleness toward leo's state. an 8’s antagonism can lead to self-sabotage when it comes to relationships, and leo’s reacting differently to raph’s attitude or not reacting at all. leo’s sudden change in attitude paired with any healing raph has left to do has likely raised his walls in a place he thought he was safe in. his 8, which is so focused on protecting himself, no longer feels like it has any control over the situation--he doesn’t know how leo’s going to act, how receptive leo will be to his own behavior, or even what to do to get leo “back”. and, obviously, leo’s worsening state is doing nothing to help any of this. raph's falling toward rejecting leo first so leo doesn’t have the chance to reject him. playing into that fear of dependency by continuing to push leo further away from him before leo has the chance to do the damage himself.

we see in scion of the shredder that he hasn’t completely given up; playing into his 7, mikey makes a coo-coo motion at his head in reference to leo and raph promptly smacks him for it. i think this says a few things: that raph took what mikey said in samurai tourist to heart and, because of that, he’s now at least trying to be more nuanced about leo’s state, verses basically having said the same thing mikey just did two episodes back… even if it might be ‘too late’ for that considering leo’s already had his worst moment and gone to japan.

when we roll around to prodigal son (s4ep16), raph’s likely on a big emotional ride over here. some of this i have to point at rushed writing and also the general vibe of early 2000s media, but some of it can also be directed at raph’s 8. we see him very briefly express “””weakness””” when leo assures him that the rest of the family is okay (he braces his hands on his knees), but upon returning to the reservoir station all the walls are right back up and he just walks right past don, who’s relieved to see him, and, boom, he’s right back on the attack--angry that the foot destroyed their home. defenses up. i’m not relieved, i was never worried, i was never scared, i’m just MAD.

conclusion

as mentioned in part 1, the two books i referenced and heavily pulled from in the more enneagram-focused sections of this project (the parts where the enneagram itself is explained rather than how it applies to the turtles) were:

the wisdom of the enneagram by don richard riso & russ hudson

the road back to you by ian morgan cron & suzanne stabile

gonna be real with you, lads, i have no idea how to properly close this out, i just looked at the page number and word count and muttered to myself "jesus christ; girl, shut up".

as i said at the start of this post, if i have anything to add/more observations regarding raph's 8 in the series i'll link them here as addendums.

for now, we're going to stay in the instinct triad and move over to leo. and from leo, we'll go to don because they both have a foot in the feeling/heart triad.

see you in the next one and, if you read all this, here's a platter of warm cookies of your favorite choice. and your favorite drink to wash it down. you're the realest.

[doubleappled]

About the blogger meme

Thank you to @bioloyg for the tag and the fic callout! Team Pete forever and for always!

Star Sign: Libra, but it never resonates the way my enneagram 2 does

Favorite Holidays: Groundhog Day. I love those little dudes (although I wish we could leave them in peace so maybe let’s just celebrate their existence and not force our way into their homes)

Last Meal: Enchiladas for dinner

Last Music Listened To: Waxahatche’s Great Thunder

Last Movie Watched: hmmmm in the theater? I think Bottoms, which I adored

Last TV Show Watched: Shameless. I’m in the beginning of season 9 and it is messing me up in 5000 different ways. The acting is great (sometimes) and the writing is awful (mostly) and the storylines are ridiculous (always) and it’s at least 5 or 6 seasons too long. But every once in a while it really makes you think, and it’s completely gotten under my skin. And I will finish it if it’s the last thing I ever do. And it might be, because wow.

Last Book/Fic Finished: I just finished Justin Torres’ Blackouts and I LOVED it. And the most recent chapter of @glitterslag’s It's Been You and Me Since Before I Was Me — is a witchy creepy Appalachian Gothic MASTERPIECE that I adore. Oh and Blissymbolics’ Colorless Richie Jerimovich, also a masterpiece even though it is sydrichie and that is giving me a teeny tiny identity crisis okay moving on

Last Book/Fic Abandoned: I am thisclose to giving up on Lessons In Chemistry. I do not get this book at all.

Currently Reading: nobody ever got my soul right like she could by seh28

Last Thing Researched for Art/Writing/Hyperfixation: Quite a bit about what happens to children of people wirh narcissistic personality disorder (hi Donna, yes I am armchair psychologizing and pathologizing a fictional character) for the fic I’m currently writing. I’m not a really intense researcher, but I’ve read all about elevator mechanics and ancient marriage rites and British parking tickets and EMP’s 2019 spring menu and how to cook uni and where pastina comes from, all for fics. I love that aspect of writing.

Favorite Online Fandom Memory: It’s embarrassing, but it’s probably the first time that one of my favorite fic authors commented on one of my own fics, ca. 2018. I was on the subway, and I dropped my phone on the disgusting wet floor when I saw the incredibly lovely comment they’d posted.

FaNvorite Old Fandom You Wish Would Drag You Back In/Have A Resurgence: I really only have two old fandoms, but I do miss HP quite a bit. It’s such a robust space, with really nice people, and so many different fests and prompts and challenges. I still read a bit when my favorite authors post, and would like to write for it again someday. (Also, if you’re the anon who’s messaged me multiple times to tell me that my new fics aren’t as good or creative as my HP, and that I “used to be a good writer” — please stop. That’s not the way to convince me to go back, and it makes me feel bad)

Favorite Thing You Enjoy That Never Had an Active or Big "Fandom" but You Wish It Did: Truly I’ve never experienced a hyperfixation like I have with The Bear. I wish fanfic had existed in its current state when I was younger, or that I’d been cool enough to figure out the concept and write it on my own. I would have been VERY ACTIVE in a Dead Poets Society fandom if it had existed when I was obsessed with that movie, a decade after it came out, when I watched it practically every day for a year 🤪

Tempting Project You're Trying to Rein In/Don't Have Time For: I just have 15 different Bear WIPs, none of which have any plot, wooo!

Anyway this was all very fun to think about. Tagging @amieraisposting @kdbleu @justabovewater20 @yannaryartside @glitterslag — only if this is your jam — and anyone else who wants to join in.

[writteninlunarlight-years]

hi :D!!! was wondering if you were still doing matchups? if so, i would like to request a bg3 match up with any of the ladies :3 also i wasn’t sure if i was supposed to describe me or my tav, but its pretty much a self insert so i hope this is ok hehe THANKS AGAIN OK LOVE YOU BYE <3

gender: trans man

pronouns: he/they

sexuality: i honestly have no idea lol, i prefer woman by a longshot though!!!

appearance: i’m 5’8” ish (~173 cm) and about 200 pounds (~91 kilos), olive skin with a bit of facial hair/stubble. i have kinda built arms and legs and a nice loveable tummy. pre top surgery though so i am always in a binder and baggy shirt. i’m growing out my mullet atm so my hair is kind of a mess but! it’s dark brown and curly :) i have lots of tattoos and piercings! my clothing style is usually some giant graphic tee and work pants with some converse or something. if i’m actually trying though, i kind of dress like a grandpa hehe

mtbi: infp, enneagram is either 2 or 4, it changes every time i take it lol

personality: gemini sun virgo moon gemini rising (don’t really care for astrology tbh), initially i am very reserved and quiet, but not like cold or aloof or anything! im just extremely nervous and shy!! i have been described as intimidating but i dont see it at ALL so take that with a grain of salt i suppose. once i’ve opened up though, i really enjoy making others laugh so i will take every opportunity to do so, even if it makes me look like an idiot lol. i tend to miss a LOT of social cues, so i usually come across as very awkward and weird, but i’ve gotten pretty good at playing it off

likes: i LOVE everything about music!! i play over 5 instruments, i listen to every genre (yes even country), and i’ve been playing in either ensembles, orchestras, or bands since i was 11. i was even a music major once upon a time! outside of music, i like cats (my cats are my favorite lol but i don’t discriminate!), video games, and occasionally reading

dislikes: i have pretty bad sensory issues so i fucking HATE places like malls, grocery stores, large department stores, etc. i also don’t like a majority of social situations with people i don’t already know, i always feel so awkward and get anxious. this one really gets people, but i don’t like a lot of foods that are widely considered to be good. for example, i dislike mac and cheese, potatoes, ketchup, and most fruits. every time i tell someone this, they literally act like i just confessed to murder

extra fun fact: i am a giant nerd. like i cannot state it enough I AM A NERD! my friends use me like human google all the time, and most of the time i have the answer 😭 not trying to imply that i’m a genius or something, i just hear a fun fact or random piece of information and then never ever forget it (did you know that for a majority of the year, the closest planet to earth is not venus or mars. it’s mercury!!)

BG3 extra:

race: half wood elf

class: wild magic sorcerer

alignment: neutral good

Don't Worry—I still have yours!! I was perplexed when I saw your PFP twice, lol. Sorry for the long wait, but here is your Match!! Also, as a Midwestern/Southerner, I enjoy the genre of Country, lol. ( I, too, am a nerd; I am my family's personal Calculator, though, lol)

~~~~~ MATCHUPS ~~~~~

Baldur's Gate 3

Shadowheart

~~~~~ HEADCANONS ~~~~~

Shadowheart is one to keep to herself as well. She likes the mysterious quiet. However, she did not oppose the notion of you being the group's leader.

She sees your anxiety around new people as a hindrance and a diversion. While you are awkwardly talking to others, she can use this time to gather hidden information or send Astarion on a pickpocketing hunt.

Your tics and antics may have frustrated her initially, but as you all grew to know one another, she found them sweet and endearing.

Soon, whenever a passerby points out your flaw, she is the first and last to defend you. (Miss Ma'am always has to get the last word in)

Shadowheart worked hard to earn your trust, and you worked hard to earn hers. Soon, you two were inseparable, for good or bad.

Shadowheart took your courting very seriously and ensured everyone at camp knew you were hers. She is a princess, after all, and gets what she wants.

If you are having a tough day around people, Shadowheart will be there to help. She has no problem leading things whenever you need her to.

When you two fight enemies, it is like watching the ocean move. You two are constantly in sync, and your health never drops below 50.

When you two officially start dating and make it public to everyone, she enjoys holding hands and soft pecks on the cheek. She is still a private person, but no harm in making sure the world knows she loves you.

When you two part ways from the others after the final battle, Shadowheart and you take on a tavern of your own in Baldurs Gate. She runs the finances and shipments while you run the entertainment and bar.

~~~~~ BLURB ~~~~~

The grove had been successfully saved. However, not every person at your party was ecstatic that you had made this choice; however, you knew you had made the right choice. With your camp full of new and old faces, you smiled, knowing that this was what you were made for right then. Though saving everyone was great and all, the loud, drunken party happening was the last thing you cared to participate in. You make your rounds to your companions to tell them when you will pack up and head out; you spot Shadowheart pouring herself a glass of wine. As you finish speaking to Karlach, you stand before the princess of the night.

Shadowheart smiles at you, gently extending a glass to you before speaking, "I knew you weren't quite the party type. I am surprised you even allowed this to happen at our camp." You laugh gently, nodding along, taking a swig of the wine. Looking out on your camp, you may not be one for large gatherings, but this was wholesome for the journey ahead. You turned back to Shadowheart as she spoke again, "We could escape from here for a while, allow you time to have a real reprieve from an intense battle versus throwing yourself into more uncomfortable situations." She always knew when you grew discontent with situations and quickly altered your group's direction. Though you may be the leader, your love and compassion for Shadowheart soon made her your second in command, much to Lazel's displeasure.

You nodded briefly to Shadowheart as she gently grabbed your hand and led you to a rock face far from camp. Privacy was excellent, and it allowed your mind to run freely for once since you were tasked with killing the Goblins. As you lounged back, sipping on the wine, Shadowheart looked at you. A simple conversation between you two led to something more intent and kind through the night. That night, you two decided to flourish in your relationship and walk through life together. Once dawn approached you, Shadowheart sat in your lap, staring out into the horizon. You gently moved some hair from her face. You smiled gently, whispering, "Because of you, my world may now be complete; fight with me, Shadowheart, and let our hearts beat as one once we are free again."

~~~~~ EXTRA ~~~~~

(You and Shadowheart had broken off from the group for the evening, taking a short stroll through Baldurs Gate. Thinking about what the future will have in store for you two as you approach the final battle)

Y/N: Princess, what if a life without Shar is genuinely not what you want. I do not want you to feel forced into a life of tavern-keeping with me.

Shadowheart: My goddess has already abandoned me since the trials. I am content now as long as I have you by my side, my love.

Y/N: When did you become so romantic? Weren't you always the brooding, icy-hearted mystery girl?

Shadowheart: That may have been me in the past, but as I have helped you through your trials, you have helped me, and I am grateful for that.

Y/N: (Smiles softly at the woman and leans in to kiss her)

Shadoheart: (places a hand on Y/N's lips, a large smirk evident on her face) However, since you seem to want to pick on me this evening, I could always return to being a brat.

Y/N: Oh, is that so? I am very sure I can handle it, my sweet. (Sweet kisses intensify)

[autisticempathydaemon]

5 + 1 Headcanons~!

Hehehehehe I was hoping and praying that someone would be foolish enough to tag me in this, and @zozo-01 and @ejunkiet activated my trap card lol thank you my darlings~

1. Alexis (and the Solaire Clan)

For some reason, I have had lots of thoughts about what kind of pets the Solaires like. Will is obviously a cat dude; we all love Bob Ross the cat. Sam is a dog kind of guy, because that makes it super funny he's dating a werewolf. Vincent seems like he'd like small, cuddly, fluffy animals like rabbits or hamsters to match his playful energy. In the isolated house Will gave her, on the edge of Solaire property, Alexis has a rescued parrot, because she can sympathize with a songbird that's been isolated from the rest of its flock. This is influenced by the my hc Alexis used to be a sonal energetic, wild parrots do actually fly about certain parts of Southern California, and Alexis would choose a pet with a long life span.

2. Love

My Love's name is Ariel! My thought process was that ETS, knowing that they wanted Love to go into the Meridian and that the only creatures who can directly interact with it are d(a)emons, would follow along with the d(a)emon naming convention. So Ariel is named after a star, albeit the artificial kind- an actual, British-American satellite that was launched in 1962.

3. Christian

Each and every one of you will have to drag surfer boy Christian out of my cold dead hands okay this is, like, one of the tenets of my heart Erik hasn't ripped out while it still beats From what I understand, both California and Australia are big on surfing, and I think the opportunity to make him an attractive, douchey, thinks-he's-hot-shit surfer dude was too good to pass up.

4. Cutie

Cutie is autistic and comes from a long family line of Telepaths. Cutie's relationship with telepathy, the way they use it, and their difficulty with not doing so reminds me a lot of my own struggle with autism and dating someone from a different cultural background than me. It's obvious their disregard for boundaries stems not from maliciousness or neglect but, I think, from a lifetime of communication issues that they've never needed to learn how to cope with properly.

5. Ollie

I've claimed Ollie for the asexuals, and anyone that tells me otherwise will be lovingly but harshly bitten (obviously /j)

+1. Enneagrams

This will probably be expanded into a full post sometime in the future (blame @romirola for enabling me), but I'll put down some of the tentative Types I've got down for the boys. Damien: thought we was a Type Six, I'm actually more convinced he's a One now. Sam: oh, the dictionary definition of a Type Eight. Geordi: Type Two but a healthy, developed Two. The work has been put in there. Lasko: Type Nine, specifically 9w1. Is that also my type? Who the fuck wants to know? /lh David: I thought, no brainer, that'd he'd be a Six but Type Three is very compelling. Asher: I'm not sure, but Asher is giving me 9w8 vibes which surprises me; I never thought I'd put him and Lasko so close on the circle, but it eats at me all the same.

Tagging: @dominimoonbeam @bratty-telepath @k9rage @horrorscoupes @angelnoodlesoup @gingerbreadmonsters @bicyclepainting @just-call-me-angel and you! If you want!

[funkymbtifiction]

Hi Charity 😊 Just finished “The Complete Enneagram: 27 Paths to Greater Self-knowledge” and have few thoughts. As EFP and likely e7 I never fully felt this type (I’m not super talkative energy ball) and always leaned towards being e4. But reading description of sx7 (and some of so7 too) really hit home - related to it a lot. On other hand couldn’t bond with any variant of 4, maybe little with so wanting appropriation and need other people. I assumed wrong that only 4 can be creative and want to be aesthetically pleased. Due to it dream nature can sx7 Esfp look like Enfp? And how sx/so7 of Enfp and Esfp would look like?

Lemme take a second to talk about 4s and creativity. Creativity is wrongfully associated to 4 – any Enneagram type can be creative, the difference lies in whether the creativity has a painful frustration element to it or not. 4s are from the frustration triad, which means “nothing is ever good enough.” Specifically, this means that the 4′s creativity has to embody their inner location and be an extension of their true self. But when nothing is ever good enough, the process of creation (self-expression) can become agonizing. “I need this to be me, and it’s not me-enough! My skills aren’t quite up to par!” Since the 4 is doing-repressed, that means a lot of anguish, frustration, and attentiveness goes into curating this “art” but they may or may not ever share it, because it’s never quite up to their own expectations. It’s never “me” enough. A 4 can get so stuck in this process, that they never make progress on their creativity, and do not finish it, because it’s never RIGHT. It’s never deep enough. Or worse, others may think they understand it, but they don’t. Their perspective annoys me!

Chestnut is wrong in one aspect – there are no “sunny 4s.” Sunny 4s do not exist. 4s are a frustration type who find something to be critical about, all the time. Whenever anyone asks me about 4, I tell them to read Anna Karenina. It’s a perfect example of a 4. Chronic dissatisfaction with what she has, because she is always yearning (another aspect of 4) for what she doesn’t have, and then when she gets it, she no longer wants it. Richard Rohr also touches on this in his book, in which he talks about the 4 woman who hated her husband until he left her, then she became full of longing for him – and when he came back, her love died the instant she opened the door to him. Always longing (frustration type) and never satisfied. You even see this in Scarlett O’Hara’s 4 wing on her 3 core, where she’s always longing for a man she can’t have (Ashley) and not the one she has (Rhett), and then when Ashley is available and Rhett has left her, she wants Rhett and not Ashley.

Being a 4 is no picnic. It’s hell, in the same way that being every other type is its own brand of hell. If more people understood this about 4, fewer people would assume themselves 4s because they are “deep and creative.” Yes, 4s can be both, but that depth and creativity is also laced with intense frustration.

In terms of aesthetics, you don’t need a 4 fix to want things to be beautiful. In fact, some 4s (usually 4w5s) like “ugly” because it’s “real.” 4s are also reactive types, and “raw reality” is REAL to them. (This reminds me of the daughter in Sweet Magnolias on Netflix. The daughter is probably either a core 4 or a strong 4 fix, and she goes around town taking pictures of “ugly things” – abandoned buildings, graffiti, etc. Her 2-fixed mother is irate about this, because she puts them on the internet and that makes the “town look bad.” They fight about it, because the 4 insists that’s the REAL town, and the 2 fixer doesn’t want people thinking the town is “trashy.” 4 - focusing on the “reality” vs. 2 “polish it up, take pictures of the pretty places!”)

Anyway, moving on from the image fix into 7.

The biggest difference between 7 Se and 7 Ne is that the Se7 is highly proactive in taking immediate action, leaping on opportunities, and learns through ‘doing’ regardless of the subtypes. They move around, they have new boy/girlfriends, they rarely stay in one place, they skydive, tour Europe, go backpacking through the mountains, etc. Life is all about living to the fullest, having many sensual experiences, and living in the moment. There’s no real room for “dreaming” – why dream and fantasize when you can actually DO THINGS? Se is all about the here and now, this is all you get, so grab life by the horns and go for a ride!

Ne by its nature is imaginative, dreamy, fantasizing – let’s talk about this and dream about it and buy tickets and cancel them tomorrow, because I no longer find that interesting (the fun was in fantasizing about it). Ne by itself is already oriented toward being in the mind, idealism, imagining how things or people or places could be better or more interesting, etc. 7 brings in a busy mind, frantic thoughts, daydreaming, envisioning, excitement about IDEAS, let’s talk about them and not do them, because the inner experience is almost as good (or sometimes way better) than the outer experience! It’s fantastical idealism, a refusal to confront harsh realities, the bright side of life. It lacks the grounding and “gritty reality” of Se and is all sunshine and ideals.

Do you immediately ACT and DO or do you DREAM and FANTASIZE?

[valyrou]

Hello! I would like to request a BSD Match up if it'd be no trouble!! (My apologies in advance for any rambling/infodumping)

• Likes: antiques, light (like varied sources of light such as sunlight, lightning, stars, ectect), lightning/thunder storms, weaponry (weapons are so cool honestly), shiny things, clouds, just about anything visually appealing basically, comfy/flowy clothing (its fun), psychology, good attention to detail in writing media/characters, hardcover books, accurate psychoanalysis (i have a knack for it apparently, so much so its even been called "scary" with how accurate i am), good music and animation, genuine quality time, intricate art, dance, matching energies with people/bonding over shared likes and interests or at least given mutual support even though we may not understand each other, being right, ectect.

• Dislikes: ear piercing/sudden loud noise, being ignored, unkept promises, forced affection, being forced to do anything really (i can compromise and like if you explain why for some things without being rude about it then sure, i'm willing to do things just as long as you don't nag me about it too harshly), pain, uncertainties (they make me anxious), cuts (i'm strangely more okay with other forms of gore if i HAVE to see it though, I'd rather not, but incisions/cuts specificly give me the ick), bad sensory/stimuli (i have sensory issues so i'm pretty selective but i've worked on being more open minded to trying things), harm to children (i can sympathize with a lot of types of people, but when kids get hurt is where i draw a firm line though I would rather not be a parent myself for several personal reasons), people changing plans or taking things without at least asking first otherwise i don't usually have a problem unless it happens too frequently depending on what it is, having things assumed about me, ect.

• Personality Traits: I've been told I'm supportive, unyielding when it counts, strange but in a positive way, insecure (i've worked on this when it comes to me as a person but sharing my interests are still a work in progress), attentive to others, controling when it feels like others could be put in harms way, loyal, opinionated, protective, i often reflect others energy to socialize, easily overwhelmed, trustworthy, mature, calm, intuitive, intellectual(?), kind, quiet usually but can spontaneously be loud (its circumstantial), picky, shy, witty, sarcastic, sassy, emotional, wise, sentimental (give me anything and i'll likely keep it regardless of what it is), indecisive, anxious, observant, smart, petty, ectect.

MBTI: INTP-T or INFP-T (its SO close between my thinking and feelings anytime i have checked) its because i definitely am an emotional person but I also can at times be prone for apathy (only really when I'm tired of caring for someone that just does not even at least try to change for their own good yet they keep coming to me for solutions only to not follow through after so much time, such as trying to several months to even years) and rationalizing things (though I do understand that sometimes you just... feel and its okay to just let yourself feel)

• Hobbies: writing, concept/character creation, psychology study, cooking, dance, singing, reading, ect.

° Extra: I kin (BSD) characters such as Atsushi, Rampo, Poe, Odasaku, ect. Also my enneagram is 4w5 (Type Four wing Five) if that'd be any help. My love language is also quality time (though I think from certain said details that may or may not be obvious).

And I think that would be enough from me. Thank you for your time and consideration and please try not to stress yourself out on my account!

A/n: Hi!! Sorry for the late response but I am still in the middle of my exams atm!! (I‘m only finished with my test exams, I now have 5 weeks before the real exams come!) anyways I hope you like who I paired you up with anyways!

Requests: Open

I‘ll match you up with…

EDGAR ALLAN POE!

I feel like you two just go well together

You inspire Poe with his novels, even help him when he needs a complicated case.

You help each other out and have mutual interests. I picture you two just stargazing at a meteor shower :)

Loves spending time with you, doesn’t matter when or where. He even be happy if you two sat on a toilet together (at a certain point at least, this man is respectful)

Great listener

Poe probably tells you all about his rivalry with Ranpo lol and you’d have to encourage him to pull forward

You, Poe and Ranpo are the detective trio on god

Karl would love you, because you remind the little raccoon of Poe in some way

Probably gives you small gifts here and there (but only small ones even if they cost a fortune) but will stop if you‘re uncomfortable or just don’t like receiving gifts at all

Comes to you when he has a novel idea and discusses his idea with you

Little (love) poems for you <3

[parad-ice-lostandfound]

<[ ♡ ~ Introduction

Hi!! I'm Bvnny, I’m excited to do this exchange with you. I’m fem-presenting but I consider myself nonbinary. I don’t perceive myself as really having a gender and i don’t feel feminine or masculine, however, i like to do more feminine presenting things. I use she/her and they/them pronouns. I’d like a romantic matchup and I’m bisexual but tbh I don’t see myself with thirteen lol so that kind of cuts out the only girl. Also, if I could NOT get paired with Beel that would be awesome- he reminds me of my little brother for me to see him like that ;-;. I don’t have a lot of freetime but I play video games with my sister and I like to sew. I also love researching gang-related crime, serial killers, and anything involving children and their development. I love criminal psychology and child development-based psychology so opportunities to learn and even combine them always make me happy.

<[ ♡ ~ Appearance

I’ve got warm black hair that goes down just past my chin. Its a medium bob with some curtain bangs. I’m 5’2 and about 100 lbs so I'm pretty small (shelves are a bitch). I’ve got light brown eyes with a weird dark greenish brown ring around it. I’m biracial (whispanic lesgooo) so I’m not super tan but I’m not a ghost either. I’m a comfortable light olive and I can tan more with sunlight (ew) I’ve got enough freckles that you notice if you're right in front of me but not so many that it takes over my whole face. I’m normally in my converse or my work boots (which are always shined to be perfect thank u <3) I’m definitely a rectangle and I’m fairly thin. I’ve got hardly any ass and minimal boob-age. I’ve got p good thighs tho so that's nice. However, I've got the “ideal” body type for the stereotypical y2k outfits!!!! That's the majority of my closet- I wear lots of flare jeans, halter tops, and honestly if you look up 2000s I've probably worn half the outfits there. Brown is the best color for me, but I wear lots of yellow (my fave!!). Another huge part of my style is influenced by chicano culture since that’s what I was raised in and around. I have loads of FB County Charlie Brown crop tops in about 8 different colors. My dream is for the charlie brown halter tops, but for now I’ll live with just my flannel halter. I really just love dressing up for anything- no such thing as overdressed in my book. I like spending hours on my makeup and I refuse to leave the house without my eyeliner and eyeshadow being perfect. I put a lot of effort into my appearance- skincare twice a day, making sure my makeup is perfect, making sure my outfit is on point, etc., etc.. If I don't feel like it’s my best, I probably won’t wear it. It’s either a nice and easy 5 minutes or it takes me an hour. Between us, I’ve been late to school because of my makeup on more than one occasion (and it’ll happen again).

<[ ♡ ~ Personality

Here’s a few of my personality stuff incase you don't want to read through:

Enneagram 2w1

INFP

Scorpio Sun, Scorpio Moon, Pisces Rising

I’ve also got ADHD and a weird anxiety disorder (mentions of anxious thoughts and compulsions) I go into at the end. it’s the last paragraph of this section if you want to skip it!!

Those basically boil it down to everything you need to know, but i’ll go in depth! I’m the oldest of 5 siblings. My sister A is about to turn 16, my sister B is 14, my brother C is 13, and my youngest (and favorite i’ve got no shame about it) is D and she’s 7. Honestly being their big sister is my only personality trait- D is all I talk about. She’s literally always with me too. I’m at all of her school events, she hangs out in my room (even when I’m not there), she’s going with me to grocery stores and if I get free time I’ll play video games with her like minecraft, among us, and maybe roblox (strong maybe, i have to be in a real good mood it makes me car sick ;-;)

My learning disability can make me forget things and seem fairly spacey. Right now it’s for sure ADHD, and my therapist is leaning towards autism as well but we’re avoiding an official diagnosis bc it will limit me in the career I want to enter. I cannot sit still for the life of me- I’m convinced if i do i’m gonna die. Normally i’m pretty good about masking with minimal energy- one of my special interests has always been psychology. i’ll mirror people for fun sometimes, but then i end up accidentally picking up habits. but, at the end of the day, i’m still a big neurodivergent mess. my biggest stims are chewing (rubber, my lips and fingers (not hard!!!), and silicone), tippy taps, arm flapping, and spinning. I love headphone cords and lego tires, they’re my favorite and they’re just so comforting. bc if my chewing stim, i’m literally always snacking. people get concerned when i tell them i don’t have a lot of full meals but i literally ate 2 costco boxes of goldfish, about 3 packages of gerber star puffs for babies, and still had lasagna for dinner. i eat a lot- just not all at once. this also can cause me to start stress eating. Its hard for me to be hyper aware at the end of the day too. My jobs require me to be watching everything, but at the end of it, i just want to watch my LEDS change colors.

As much as I love my siblings, they are also the reason you can see a couple gray hairs starting to grow. They are the biggest trigger for my compulsions- especially D. If something isn’t perfect, and my youngest sister is around, I get unreasonably stressed out. I always joke that I can never sleep when she’s in my room because I’m worried the Kool-Aid man will bust through the wall and I'll sleep through it. However, there is some weight to that. If (and tbh when) my sister falls asleep in my bed, I’m up doing anything to keep me busy because for whatever reason it just doesn’t feel safe to sleep. This stems for the kids I work with as well. My co-workers make jokes about me being a perfectionist but it feels like if something is out of place bad things will happen. We love anxiety, real hot girl shit.

Small things I’ll do is constantly re-organize things. I’m constantly fidgeting with stuff and putting things back into “place” (where I decided they have to go for the rest of time). I do the same with our silverware. I’ll make sure all of our plates are in a rainbow. I have to do certain things in the exact same order every time. I’m VERY particular about how stuff in my room is- the quickest way to stress me out is to touch my stuff, move it around, or mess with my routine. Depending on how I’m feeling, that might literally make me have a breakdown. But being able to expect things every single time or fix things and make it right just calms me and makes me feel in control of something small, and even that can boost my mood and confidence a bit.

I work 3 jobs right now- law enforcement, I co-teach in a special occupational pre-school for high school students, and I baby sit at least twice a week. I have been pursuing a childcare career for 5 years, however, right now I’m piloting an state-wide high school internship program for local law enforcement departments. It was a pain to try and get started- I get to take the trial run since i’m 18 and a senior with a lot of law club training. I got voted as president of our high school’s law enforcement club as a joke my sophomore year and I just… keep… getting… re… elected. It’s not bad- I actually switched from thinking about teaching because of it and now I’m considering juvenile probation and teaching as a retirement job. I’m still debating- teaching is very important to me.

Because I’ve had a lot of work in childcare and shitty retail jobs, i’ve got an ungodly amount of patience. I have a scar on my leg from where a kid threw a table at me- he was still my favorite at the end of my program tho. It takes a lot for me to not like someone. I’m an upbeat person who is always eager to help and lend a hand. There’s an old lady trying to load something big into her car? Bam, Bvnny to the rescue. Need a door opened? Bam, door held. A lot of this stems from being the oldest of 5 tbh- I not only want to be someone my siblings can look up to, but I also want to be someone who can be as awesome as their parents. Admittedly, it gets really difficult when my siblings are all so different, my parents are grade-A overachievers, and I've got a bingo game going with potential learning disabilities. But I always push myself anyways- usually too far and burn myself out but it’s cool (this is a cry for help /j)

Because of how much I push myself to be better, I see a lot of improvement over time. However this also can make me a smidgen (a big smidgen lmaooo) bit defensive over how I present myself. Like, I’ve been ugly. I’ve been teased. I’ve been bullied. But I’ve worked my ass off to fix those things, and I work my ass off to maintain those things. I just put a lot of effort into how I carry myself and having it insulted is like damn I worked so hard for what???? Like if you call me ugly its like ugh but honestly I don’t care if I don’t know you. The one thing that will ALWAYS piss me off is when people try to discount my intelligence. Like I said before, I’ve been the ugly kid. I’ve been a weird kid. I’ve been the kid that gets bullied for stuff I can’t control. HOWEVER, the one thing I’ve always had going for me was that I’m smart. I was always the one helping with homework and it saved my ass more than once. I’ll take constructive criticisms, but not asshole criticism. It’ll hurt my pride </3

On a serious note, If I were to connect to any of the seven sins, it would 100% be Lucifer’s. I wouldn’t say i’m lucifer-levels of pride, but like it’s def there. I take pride in my siblings, my appearance, my job, etc., etc. I’m proud, but I feel like I’ve earned it with how hard I’ve worked to get here and how fucking cool my siblings turned out (that also might just be my ego talking, who knows?) Like A and B are so beyond beautiful and super popular. They're awesome at sports and are amazing with people. C is 6’2 and 270lbs of muscle (he’s 13 need i remind you ;-;) but he’s gentle and he gives the best hugs and he can fix literally anything. We also go on brother-sister dates to panda express after he wins a football game (he’s had a perfect season and my wallet hurts). D is so good at art and she’s beautifully kind. She can communicate better than adults do. Like if someone is bothering her she can set her boundary and stick with it. She is super empathetic and loves animals and wants to be a dog groomer when she grows up. She’s unironically funnier than all of us and with the amount of sass that leaves her mouth it’s obvious she’s got 4 big siblings (it’s never disrespectful tho, that’s the best part).They are all going to do wonderful things and I’m so excited to see it. I will also do anything, and I mean anything, to guarantee they get to do those great things they dream about.

<[ ♡ ~ Relationship Info

For a partner, I seriously need someone who can understand that I have no freetime. At all. Ever. I hardly ever leave the house, and if I do it’s literally to go shopping. For 18 i feel so lame lol. Chances are my partner is going to be one of my 3 friends. Despite not even being out of high school yet (2 more months thank god) I need something more domestic and less teenage romance. Like getting home from work and relaxing with our 4 dogs (forgot to mention I have 4 big dogs whoops). I need someone who is decent enough with kids to get along with my siblings. It’s also super important that I can have conversations with them- and they want to have them too. Not like “Hi honey how was your day?” “good” “What did you do?” “work.” I want them to want to talk too. I want to know everything about my partner. Would you love me if i was a worm? Would you love me if YOU were a worm? What if we were both worms? I want to have stupid conversations like that but I would also kill to talk about psychological theories and child development and have not-stupid conversations. I want someone intelligent enough to talk to me and make me want to learn, but also willing to indulge in my stupid theoretical conversations. They’ve also gotta understand my siblings will literally always come first. It could be our wedding day and if my sister calls me and says she needs me i’ll be out of there so fast you wouldn’t even have time to process. Family is super important to me, and eventually I want my very own little family that will be just as important, if not more so.

My top 3 love languages are quality time, physical touch, and acts of service. I’d say quality time and physical touch are the ones I want the most, but acts of service are the ones I appreciate the most if that makes any sense.

Quality Time- I'm huge on napping together and just parallel play (doing different activities but together). I love napping together because I literally always need one, but I'm more than content to just cuddle while I play my games on my phone and my partner does whatever they’re doing. Hell, we don’t even have to cuddle (I'd like it if we did). We can just sit in the same room and enjoy each other's presence. My quality time also extends to my family- the chances of my youngest sister being with me is pretty much 100%. She’s my thunder buddy- if she doesn't want to hang out with you neither do I. Most of the time if she’s with me she’s drawing or playing games on her own and is just hanging out with me in my room or in the car. If I have time Ill play games with her so if you aren’t down to spend some time with her then out the door with you. Realistically, if I were to go down to the devildom, she’d end up coming with me in some freak magic accident. And I’d make it so she can stay- when I said I’d do anything for them I was NOT kidding.

Physical Touch- I know I said we don't have to cuddle but like if we can I’m over the moon. I love getting to feel my partner. I'm okay with linking pinkies when we do stuff or touching knees when we sit. As long as I can feel my partner next to me I'm over the moon! I love hugs, I love kisses, I love playing with people's hair, I love getting my hair played with. I’m always giving my youngest sister little scratches on the head or smoothing her hair down or straightening her clothes. I’ll give her hugs before I leave and she always falls asleep cuddling with me. I never say no when my brother wants to give me hugs (which is all the time, bless his heart) and even when he picks me up off the ground I’m still okay with it. My middle sisters are NOT as fond of me touching them so I try to avoid it- B will literally swat my hand away if I’m even remotely close to her. But I’ll do small things like tucking in their shirt tags or fixing their hair. Does this fall into acts of service? Kind of, but it’s the only contact I get with them let me have it ;-;

Acts of Service- I have so much I need to get done. All the time. Every day. And there are tons of things I struggle with doing even when I’m not trying to get 80 other tasks done. Like laundry- laundry always ends up being the last of my list. Without fail. Cleaning in general just hardly ever happens.I pretty much live in my car with how often I’m driving and it definitely shows. If I find time to clean my spaces, chances are it’s at the very end of my day when I’m tired and honestly I end up putting it off for extra hours of much needed sleep. It’s not that I want my partner to do all the cleaning- honestly I’m so particular I’d rather do it myself- but if they did something like laundry or they made food for tomorrow or just something small it means the world. However this also goes both ways. I love doing stuff for other people. I love getting to make my partner meals or help with a project or carry something for them. It just makes my heart happy to relax with my loved ones. <3

Ifs too long let me know- I’ll give you a TLDR lol <3333 I’m super looking forward to this matchup with you :)))

Hi Bvnny! I am so excited and happy to do this exchange* with you! Your idea is one of a kind and so unique, and I love it very much! Don't worry about having written too much, it's more material for me to work with after all. Now, without any further delay, I pair you with...

Simeon!

To be quite honest, while I was reading through everything, it was so hard to pinpoint who would be a good match for you. I would think, "Huh, this character is perfect for them" and then BAM! you hit me with something that makes me go "Now wait a minute-"

In all honesty, it was fun, and for some time I was stuck between Mammon and Simeon, but Simeon won at the end, as you can see lol.

Simeon adores everything about you, from your freckles to your outfits. How can he not? You are mesmerizing in his eyes. He feels extremely happy that you take care of how you look, not because of what others think or say, but because you feel like it, because you want to. He wouldn't mind if the two of you got late for RAD because you wanted your makeup to be perfect. Chances are he's there with you watching you, his eyes wide in wonder and admiration, or helping you if you allow him to.

While he is not one for much PDA , one of Simeon's favorite things is to press featherlight kisses to your freckles, whenever you allow him. Solomon teases him about being obsessed with them every once in a while, but Simeon doesn't mind.

Simeon is good with children. He likes to listen to you talking about your siblings and wishes to meet them himself. He knows and understands that family comes first for you. He gets a little nervous about meeting your siblings, especially D, because he wants to leave a good impression on them. Not only because they are your siblings, but because your talking about them has made him grow fond of them.

Simeon is very attentive when it comes to you. He can't help it, its in his nature to care and nurture. He is good at realizing when you get a bit fidgety or look like you need sometime away from whatever has your anxiety spiking. He makes sure that you don't skip meals, and even if you do snack because of your chewing stim, whatever you snack on is nutritious. He will absolutely die if you mirror something he does or pick up a habit of his. You are too adorable for his poor angel heart, have mercy on him lol-

Simeon likes how the two of you you could be discussing whether you would love the other person if they were a worm, and afterwards, about a documentary you watched. Many of your discussions give him ideas for his books. You are, quite literally, his muse.

Simeon doesn't like seeing you burn yourself out. He loves you, and knows just how beautiful and amazing you are inside and out. Your tendency to push yourself too far brings out his protectiveness, and he can and will mother hen you into taking care of yourself before anything else. He will not have you ignoring your needs and wants. Simeon also will not stand for anyone taking undue advantage of your helpful nature.

Simeon is in awe of you. Your three jobs? Your ungodly amount of patience? Your fierce and protective love for your siblings? Your pride in yourself and your siblings? All of this inspires him, and he falls in love with you a little bit more every second he spends with you. Loving Simeon is very natural, very soft, and definitely domestic. He is very physically affectionate in private, but a little reserved in public. He adores cuddling with you anytime, whether it is while you are talking to each other, watching a movie, or its you playing a game on your phone while he reads or something. He knows you don't have a lot of free time, and likes to spend what time you do have with him plastered to your side. In public, he is not as clingy, but anyone who looks at him knows that he is completely head over heels for you. How? Because he is always at your side, his hand on the small of your back either guiding you somewhere or just resting there like a claim. His eyes never seem to wander from you, a content smile on his face.

Simeon likes doing things for you. So yes, he will do the laundry for you and clean up, just to see that radiant smile on your face. He likes playing with your hair, and falls in love with you all over again if you do it to him. One of the things he buys for you every time he goes shopping is hair accessories. One time he made a flower crown for you himself, then spelled it so the flowers wouldn't wilt. He is surprisingly innocent and boyish and just so, so in love with you~

Simeon is very supportive. No matter what you want to do, which career you want to choose, he is always there for you. He had been told his presence is soothing and comforting, and he wishes you feel the same way. That you feel comfortable and loved and cherished whenever you're with him, because you deserve the world. And he would love to give it to you on a silver platter.

*Please note that matchups are not open right now.

[jonkentdeservesbetter]

I wrote a comment in r/SupermanAndLois awhile ago, where I mentioned how I’d one day get around to writing out an analysis on Jon’s character and his relationships. I have reposted that on my blog, but it’s largely irrelevant, except to say that I intended to.

The thing is, my original plan was to rewatch the previous two seasons, while taking some thorough notes on Jon’s personality and his relationships, and how those connections tie into his reactions and reflect his personality.

This never happened - despite starting my essay last year - because every time I tried going through a rewatch, I…got too upset.

It was one thing watching the first seasons, hoping for the last few episodes of season 2 - in the break after the ep. with the Barn Scene, wherein it seemed things were at last going to be addressed for Jon and begin to change for the better - to be what we hoped, in comparison with rewatching after…S2.

To sum it up: I couldn’t get through them.

Still, I did get somewhere with my analysis, and I’d like to hear any thoughts others may have in response. It’s really very little, when not posting my messy, unedited ramblings, but essentially: do you know Enneagram types? I’m actually not that familiar with it, aside from knowing things about my own. But when I was considering what and how to write the essay I’d mapped out, I thought a look at other personality analyses could be useful for kickstarting the process. So I went to the website. I remembered thinking of the profile and analysis on my type, how I’d been shocked at how accurate it all felt; which is why it’s what came to mind. I didn’t expect to actually find a type that fit Jon, but well.

Jon seems like a 3w2, in my opinion, and Jordan an 8, although I didn’t dive deep enough into the latter’s to determine wing.

Here’s the link to the Type Three profile. I’m not going to say I think every single line is spot-on for him, but I think it’s useful, still. Note: TW for ableist language in some parts.

Also: consider that some of the ‘unhealthy’ levels explained actually match Bizzaro!Jon.

There’s a lot to read and agree or disagree with, depending on how you, personally, interpret Jon’s characterization. For me, I found these excerpts quite striking:

[…] since these professions have status in their community and in the eyes of the family. No matter how success is defined, Threes will try to become somebody noteworthy in their family and their community. They will not be a “nobody.”

To this end, Threes learn to perform in ways that will garner them praise and positive attention. As children, they learned to recognize the activities that were valued by their parents or peers, and put their energies into excelling in those activities. Threes also learned how to cultivate and develop whatever about them is attractive or potentially impressive.

[…] Thus, the deeper problem is that their search for a way to be of value increasingly takes them further away from their own Essential Self with its core of real value. From their earliest years, as Threes become dependent on receiving attention from others and in pursuing the values that others reward, they gradually lose touch with themselves. Step by step, their own inner core, their “heart’s desire,” is left behind until they no longer recognize it.

Thus, while they are the primary type in the Feeling Center, Threes, interestingly, are not known as “feeling” people; rather, they are people of action and achievement. It is as if they “put their feelings in a box” so that they can get ahead with what they want to achieve. Threes have come to believe that emotions get in the way of their performance, so they substitute thinking and practical action for feelings.

Seriously, there’s a lot of Jon on that page.

[indepth-mbti]

Hi there, first of all, I'm a big fan of your content and I think every post you make has such an incredible level of details. I want to thank you for them cause they have helped me a lot in my journey of self discovery (which is something I value greatly).

I have been typed in the past as INTP which I think is a mistype, because I believe myself to be a Ni dom. One thing I'm not too sure about is my auxillary function. I do find a lot of information out there about how INXJ have a great sense of purpose, but INTJ's goals are more intellectual focused and self-serving, while INFJ's goals are more humanitarian focused. Now I know these are probably mostly stereotypes but I would appreciate your input. I do think my sense of purpose is directed more towards myself, and how I can gain more knowledge and become more sufficient in my personal interests. But when it comes to decision making I'm very concious of how others are affected and I do value harmony and honor greatly, which is a big giveaway to me that I might be an INFJ.

One thing I'm also curious about is whether or not I'm an ennegram 3. I don't think the INFJ and ennegram 3 combination is talked about very often, would you say they are very contradictory? I'm quite fixated on my image and how I present myself to others. I developed alot of anxiety and was very reclusive in the past due to thinking I need to work more on the perfect version of myself before presenting it to the world if that makes sense. That sounds to me like a quite unhealthy 3. I suspect my tritype to be 371, which I wonder how you think a person with that combination would present themself.

I recognise I do sound quite vain in this post but I'm genuinely very curious, and I do value your insight very much. Thank you for your time!

Yes, you're not an INTP. I don't think anything of what you say contradicts Ni dom. What you say is not enough to spot if you're INTJ or INFJ, so I'm going to talk about the key differences here:

Ni + Te = Synthesises external data to its essence, they search a clear and conceptual conclusion. They're good at setting priorities and synthetising complex ideas and concepts. Seeks tangible results, takes action only if the outcome they desire is going to happen.

Ni + Fe = Aspires to some hidden purpose in their interpersonal connections, desires to see how their visions can help the external structures that their Fe care about. Sees things in others where there’s nothing.

Ni + Fi = They follow a personal sense of direction. They have clear personal priorities/bonds which can or not be aligned with social expectations, they just don't care. They trace clear strategies that don't betray their sense of "self".

Ni + Ti = The kind of person who wants to polish their single obsession until the end, obsessive mentality of “there’s not enough; I can go deeper.” Blind to their inner contradictions. Reality is disappointing.

About your Enneagram type:

"I'm quite fixated on my image and how I present myself to others. I developed alot of anxiety and was very reclusive in the past due to thinking I need to work more on the perfect version of myself before presenting it to the world if that makes sense."

This is sp1 with a 3 fix. I don't think you're an E3. You sound too inward focused to be an E3, which is a cognitively extraverted Enneagram type who runs away from introspection and examining the self.

The sp1 embodies "worry" and a sense fo anxiety due to constantly worrying about not being perfect, desiring to meet these personal perfect standards.

I think that INFJ sp1 136 tritype is what makes sense for you based on what you wrote. Check the SP1 description!

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by In-depth MBTI | Laia (@indepth_mbti)

[particular-one]

hiii may i request a matchup for genshin, haikyuu and tears of themis—preferably the male characters please! i usually go by kei hehe, hope we get to interact more often (read ur works, its so good!! keep it up<3)

for starters, my mbti is intj-t and my enneagram is 5w6 if it helps!

i'd say that i am a person of routine. i like to follow through a schedule or routine because i do think that really helps me structure my day. it does get to the point that i neglect my own health because i prioritize getting a task done for the day. i also hate changing plans last minute, so i feel guilty when i do that sometimes.

in terms of personality, i'd say i'm pretty introverted, so i really need someone else to approach me first. when i open up to someone, i try my best to help and support them as much as i can, even if they don't know. i'm not really one to show my affections blatantly like saying it out loud so i guess you can say my love languages are acts of service and quality time!!

in my spare time, i like to draw, write, read and play games. one thing i want to get into but unfortunately, have not succeeded in yet is cooking. god knows what happens when you give me a pan (i'd probably give myself food poisoning).

in a romantic partner, i like someone who brings me out of my zone all the while respecting my boundaries. i have a small social battery so i would like a partner who isn't so clingy. the major icks i have in a partner is someone who is overly selfless (i don't think i can live everyday constantly worrying about my partner) and someone who is overly emotional because sometimes it gets too overwhelming for me.

for date ideas, i'd like something that is either intellectually stimulating, like a date night where we solve mysteries on crime channels or something very laid back, like a picnic or something.

thank you and i hope u have a great day<3

hello kei! thank you aaaa 🥹 i'm so glad you like them (ur childe angst fic on my brain 24/7) hope you like ur matchups!

GENSHIN IMPACT ---- HEIZOU SHIKANOIN

⋆｡ﾟ☁︎｡⋆｡ ﾟ☾ ﾟ｡⋆ heizou isn't the easiest person to impress — so kudos to you that you're able to attract his attention. as someone who has seen his fair share of intriguing dynamics that tend to get people, like clients of the tenryou commission, in sticky situation, he rarely gets invested in relationships and whatnot. you, however, were definitely testing this resolve of his. he definitely approaches you first, and though your first meeting was admittedly awkward, you both grew to mutually respect each other very much! sometimes, heizou would go to you with a case and ask for your input — even if he already got it all figured out, he honestly just wants an excuse to talk to you. as a partner, heizou remembers every single detail you tell him about yourself like its just abcs to him that he immediately knows what to get you. he's much more extroverted compared to you, so he definitely would inch you towards stepping out of your comfort zone. expect a lot of unorthodox date ideas from him, tbh. but heizou is also a very perceptive guy and knows when enough is enough for your comfort. when you mentioned how much you liked solving mysteries, he sometimes would bring you along on simple cases (as long as it was safe ones, he wouldn't want to put you through unnecessary danger). when he sees you staying past midnight to finish yet another task, he would offer to help you or just stay up to keep you company. for one of those times he goes the extra mile for you, heizou would organize a whole murder mystery party and invite some of your mutual friends for a fun time. he also constantly affirms how intelligent he finds you to be! thank goodness both of you haven't gotten the time to cook for each other but heizou usually brings you snacks like dango and milk tea.

HAIKYUU!! ---- TSUKISHIMA KEI

⋆｡ﾟ☁︎｡⋆｡ ﾟ☾ ﾟ｡⋆ tsukishima found you to be too quiet during your first meeting. he barely knew anything about you because you weren't exactly the type who'd volunteer personal information, but it was a pretty good change of pace compared to when he's around his karasuno teammates. tsukishima is notably quite antagonistic to almost everyone, but with you, it ends up becoming a banter of sorts, with both of you not really holding any ill towards the other. he admires your tenacity and your commitment to stick to a routine, which is one of the many things that contributed to his gradual affection towards you. yamaguchi though is probably the one who makes him realize this, lol. tsukki probably would be too dense to realize the crush. as a partner, tsukishima isn't very showy with his affection. he prefers not to display his relationship with you in public, as he prefers to keep things with you as more solemn and private. though tsukishima gradually opens to holding your hand in public — at first, he says that it's because he wants to make sure you don't get lost, but his teammates clearly see right through this excuse. he's the definition of grumpy that softens around the person he likes, as he lets you see his vulnerable and softer side. though you may end up bantering still, it's still more of in a teasing way rather than an antagonistic kind. tsukishima has some strong opinions and so do you, so the both of you respect each other's wishes very well and find a common ground or compromise around date ideas. he's not the surprise type of person, but date ideas from him are often meticulously planned, as he understands that you like you a semblance of a routine.

TEARS OF THEMIS ---- VYN RICHTER

⋆｡ﾟ☁︎｡⋆｡ ﾟ☾ ﾟ｡⋆ vyn was ... well, he was a little complicated. for one, he places a lot of people at arm's length, so whenever he interacted with you, it's fairly obvious that there is an emotional barrier that prevented a true connection. vyn could easily read you like an open book, but it wasn't the same case for you until you actually persisted to knowing even more about him. the both of you engage in a lot of deep conversations which honestly contributed to vyn's growing affections for you, though he would deny this. funny that the psychiatrist man cannot comprehend when did his feelings become romantic, but it's probably due to his deep seated insecurity of you not liking or understanding him back. as a partner, vyn does not easily open up — but he definitely goes the extra mile to make sure your comfort is prioritized. though it takes a while for him to actually be vulnerable with you, he's a romantic when it came to making sure you feel loved. as someone who grew up seeking for affection but never receiving it, he doesn't want to put you through such. words of affirmation? he's got you covered there. maybe it was his training as a psychologist, but he knows the right things to say when you're feeling stressed and gives exceptional advice when you're struggling. he doesn't like seeing you frustrated or neglectful of your own health, so he definitely helps you in tasks when it's getting rather late. oh! and every birthday, he would bake you a cake and your favorite treats for the day. though he's attempted to teach you how to bake, it somehow fails every time so he just resolves to bake it for you himself.

[tinyevelyn]

*gets extremely hyper*

OOOOOOOOO EEEEEEEEEEEEEE *EXPLODES*

FINALLY MJ!!! AKDHDHKKJS I LOVE HER SOOO MUCH!!!!

now like every character that my friends make, I'm gonna do some shitty character analysis for this sweet adorable lil blue-hair baby girl

from what I read, Rika seems to have regret not being able to save her parents, which gives her the desire to become strong enough to protect her loved ones (or anyone in general) no matter what. She can't let the same thing happen again and know its all her fault. I kinda think she'd blame herself for not being able to save her parents and would push herself intensely to become a demon slayer so no one could experience the pain she felt.

I feel that if she were to go out fighting demons and one specifically targets a family (bonus if family is just like hers), she'd go crazy, she'd be flying everywhere, attacking the demon every second she could lay a finger on them and she'ddo it all by herself. Even when she's hurt, or if someone else needs help, she'd be too focused on that one demon, blinded by anger, not at the demon but at herself. If she can't save this family, she probably doesn't deserve to be a demon slayer or even be alive.

When she's not fighting demons, she'd be just like what you said, a sweetheart, always looking out for others. I'd like to think she can be quite protective, and can sometimes be a bit patronising at times. I also feel like she'd be quite private about her personal life, her trauma and how it impacted her. And she'd also keep that anger she has in herself, to show that she's not driven by a strong emotion, bc idk if a demon slayer is driven to kill demons by strong emotion, it may not be the best (super hero stuff lmao) but yeeaa

yhat's all I got, it's more of diving into her backstory and understanding how the death of her parents would affect the way she is now. It's quite messy and may not be how you visualise her sooo uhmmm ye (pls don't get mad) anyways I had fun doing this and based on this she'd probably be a 9w8 sp/so who looks for peace within herself and wishes to be strong enough to protect others, that's the enneagram I think she is :3

I have more "headcanons" about her but I'll wait until you give me the greenlight bc I may get annoying and you may not want to dive sooo deeply into Rika's character sooo ya that's fine

✧Rika Hinata✧

❀Info Below Cut❀

Name: Rika Hinata.

Age: 16.

Gender: Female - She-Her.

Race: Asian + Hispanic.

Height: 5’7” (171 cm).

Affiliation: Demon Slayer/ Demon Slayer Corps.

Rank: Hinoe.

Breathing Style: Sapphire Blaze - Derived From Flame Breathing.

Personality: ISFJ, Caring, hardworking, independent, Understanding, protective. Rika is a kind girl by heart, always there looking out for others, worrying about their well beings, Always welcoming to those who are new. She greatly admires and looks up to the hashiras and her close comrades, very respectful towards them. However, Despite her kindhearted nature, she is a tough girl and she likes to keep most things to herself, putting up walls whenever she’s feeling down or upset. can be a bit intimidating when angry, just as long as you don’t say anything bad to those she is close with, she is quick to defend them. very protective.

꒰აBackstory໒꒱

—————————————————————————————————————

At the age of 10, Rika had been taken under the care of Sakonji Urokodaki, after Giyuu Tomioka found her in the woods, unconscious and bleeding.

She had been attacked by a demon in her home, where her parents were both killed, fighting for their lives and trying to get their daughter to safety. The demon had tried to get to her, but with her quick speed, she out ran him and ran out into the woods, running into the late night until dawn, Having her to pass out due to exhaustion.

After being saved, it was from there she learned about the demon slayer corps. Right then and there, she wanted to be trained and to become a demon slayer. she was willing to become strong, So that she can protect and save other people…So, She trained for two years under urokodakis guidance. within those two years, she looked up to both urokodaki and Giyuu, forming a close bond with the two.

At the age of 13, she went into final selection and officially became a demon slayer. Promising herself and the others that she would become stronger than ever, to fight and protect to those in need.

𑁍Some Fun Facts!𑁍

-She was trained on using water breathing and that was originally gonna be her combat style. but when she met Rengoku and saw him practicing flame breathing, it piqued her interest, and asked him if he could train her, and he agreed. quickly the two formed a strong sibling bond overtime. During those training times, is when she creates Sapphire Blaze Breathing, to suit her more with her slight flexibility and spear combat skills.

- Rika is a fast runner and a bit flexible, she can fight easily and swiftly with her spear.

- She’s actually a very good cook! Happily helps aoi at the butterfly estate with cooking meals.

- She has cold hands and her body temperature is mostly on the slightly cooler side.

- Tends to get bashful when praised or complimented.

- Concha’s or anything spicy is her favorite food.

- She smells like lavender and freesias, with a hint of sweetness.

─ ⊹ ⊱☆extra☆⊰⊹ ─

*ੈ✩‧₊˚༺☆༻*ੈ✩‧₊˚

Dividers by: @/cafekitsune

[autisticempathydaemon]

Hello hello! I would love a matchup!

What song are you fixated on at the moment? What lyric or verse, and why? - Playing with Bad Luck by Set it Off ... Its a kinda day/ its a kinda week/ Its a kinda year/ When you cut and paste/ When you're on your knees/ When you're out of tears (damn)/ examine every scar. i'm auditing my karma/ something just ain't adding up/ it's close, but no cigar/ i'm dancing in the dark cause/ every light keeps shutting off/ i'm playing with bad luck

What is your Enneagram type? - I'm an 8w7! also an ISFJ personality type

Tell me about your childhood imaginary friend.- I created a lot of stories and characters as a kid, most of them were knights or huge creatures

What is your go-to way to fall asleep? - I usually have a cup of tea and sit with my dog. On nights where I can't get my brain to shut up I'll play audiobooks/redacted sleep aid lol

What is your favorite of Redacted’s audios, and why? - Okay but something about the comfort/ reverse comfort audios hit a place in my heart I didn't think was in me. Like, I get why I like the healing audio cause the listener is getting doted on, and that's cute. (No matter how many times I listen to Gavin's comfort audios I will sob every time) But when I listen to a reverse comfort, it makes me love a character even more. Like the fact that they trust their listener (i.e., David breaking down, Gavin giving bits and pieces of his past to freelancer/ breaking down in the inversion, Milo injured, etc), makes my heart swell.

What Redacted boy holds no appeal to you, and why? Like, not the one you hate but the one who you don’t get the hype for. (I won’t judge, I promise.) - Okay, the character is made for the audience to not really like them, but Marcus (Project Meridian) sets a wave of anger in me I could never begin to explain like the manipulation tactics and gaslighting make me want to murder someone, BUT SOMEHOW IM LIKE "Oh I like Vega" which don't get me wrong also hate Vega at times but the way he acts with warden makes me love him

Tell me about that one book/movie/TV show you know all the words to. - does Redacted count "just gotta say ding dong the witch is dead fucking goes off and you better promise to play that at my funeral ALSO unrelated macho man unironically fucking goes off AND YOU KNOW WHAT actually IT IS related because you absolutely need to promise to play that at my funeral too back to back Macho man immediately followed by ding dong the witch is dead what do you say?" .... don't ask BUT IF NOT I also know pirates of the caribbean, the Grinch (live action), Mitchells vs the machines, Monty Python and the holy grail, too name a few

Which Redacted boy are you platonically attracted to? Like- forget dating, which dude do you want to be your best friend? - OH MY GOD CAN VINCENT BE MY BESTIE (obvi also love ash and guy but let me explain) Okay vincent is one of those guys who's sarcasm is top notch like homie could roast anyone without a second to waste. Also I feel like I could literally sit in silence with Vincent and it not feel awkward yknow

Do you have a go-to thing you ramble about when you’re tired, and if so, what is it? (For example, my boyfriend knows I’m ready to sleep when I start talking about space.) okay, I will ramble about history like there is no tomorrow. for example, did you know that Constantine the Great considered himself such a great Christian that he called himself the "13th Apostle" on his tomb (which very few people have been able to see because you have to be closely enough related to him to enter) he didn't write his name on his coffin instead it says 13th apostle also he put the remains of the other apostles in his tomb because "he deserved it" ......anywayssss

Tell me your go-to gas station and drink combo. - flaming hot Cheetos and a sprite reset my life in a way that makes me want to achieve my dreams

Tell me about your favorite playlist at the moment. - The Balance, its so beautifully made, starting with a close experience to death, to cult antics, to AN UNEXPECTED CROSSOVER. its just made sooooooooooooo well

What’s your guilty pleasure in media, and why? - Okay cringy middle school emo/ animatic music from my past is engrained into my brain

And whatever else you think tells me about who you are! - i'm 5'2 and the youngest of a big family. I'm an artist and currently working on an illustration degree. I love love love voice acting. Thats about it! THANKS

You gave me so much to work with here, and yet it was a challenge. Like, I could have gone in so many directions. I think you could work so well with so many of the boys, but ultimately, it had to be Asher.

Your submission gives me the vibe of someone who’s loyal, unique, and confident, who knows what they’re about and always has something interesting to say even if you’re not particularly extroverted. I like the idea of pairing Asher with you because he would perfectly uplift you, pulling you out of your shell and giving you the stage to shine while also knowing when to take the reins and support you, in your education, social situations, whenever.

Your life would be so genuinely fun together- not just because Asher’s so fun as a dude but because y’all have so much in common. You two would have the same taste in music (that FOB fan boy) and pop culture. You’d be the tea drinker to his Monster Energy vibes, the perfect balance in the house to feed his bubbly nature but also ground him. Also, Asher should totally have a dog he can play with, so it’s even more perfect.

Song:

If you don't swim, you'll drown/ But don't move, honey/ You look so perfect standing there/ In my American Apparel underwear/ And I know now, that I'm so down/ Your lipstick stain is a work of arts I got your name tattooed in an arrow heart/ And I know now, that I'm so down

5SOS seems like just the sort of group y’all and Asher would like now, the group that was pop-punk adjacent and has evolved with its audience. This track in particular is a classic, and I can see Asher totally jamming out to this in the car, air-guitaring at red lights, and demanding applause from you when he’s done (which you’d give because he’s just that cute).

Runner-Ups:

Like I said, there were so many boys that could have been matched with you, so there were also too many options for runner-ups! I settled on Anton because he’d be so cute with a tea-drinking dog lover. He deserves a puppy and a partner who makes them a pot to share. I also like you with Guy because an artist and writer couple is just too cute to pass up.

note: thank you for waiting 🖤

Read this post and send me an ask if you’d like a match-up of your own! 💌

[funkymbtifiction]

Hey, what would you say the significance of wings is? Do you struggle to tell if you’re a 6 or a 7 sometimes? Personally I’ve been torn between 8 and 9 since as long as I can remember discovering enneagram. I’ve got many friends who studied enneagram for years and also struggle(d) to tell between their core and their wing… they are certain it’s one or the other but flip flop between saying which is core and which is wing. This indecision happens most often when one of the types ppl are torn between is Attachment… but I have seen it happen to 7-8 liners and 1-2 liners too. I’d love to hear your thoughts on this.

Wings flavor your core, but ultimately are "ruled" by your core. You are doing it "in service of" your core desires. For example, I do relate to some of the 7 stuff because of being a 6w7 (re-framing, skipping past my feelings, hating negativity, not wanting to dwell on upsetting things, always needing things to look forward to, feeling like there's so much I want to do and not enough time)...

But.

I am a super-ego type through and through, and ruled by "should." My 7 gets ruled over by my 6, who sets the agenda and is much stronger. How 7 shows up primarily on a daily basis for me is to mix a little of itself into my decisions/agenda and also cause confusion.

Like Goblins of Discord said in their 7w6 description, the 7w6 knows there's stuff they "should" be doing -- but that's boring, so I won't do it. The 6w7 knows they should do it, and they usually do it, because the guilt trip becomes too great. 7s are not afraid to self-reward, 6s feel they need to earn rewards (justify it to themselves and others).

When in doubt, strip away the externals and look at the core. 9w8s are withdrawn types who are only assertive to defend their right to be unbothered by everyone else (failing to establish boundaries, then being angry about their lack of boundaries and asserting them too late). 8w9s are assertive types who are only withdrawn in their desire to get what they want (going for it hard, and not wanting others to try to stop them, so they assert boundaries early and in many instances, too soon and too severely, then backtrack later).

The only way to prove your type to yourself is to read deeply enough about the type (in actual books that go in-depth, not YouTube "gurus" or internet forums or brief online descriptions) to identify its mechanisms and introspect long enough to see yourself using your lines not only under stress and growth, but ALL THE TIME. If you are an 8, you will have 5 in your back pocket and a pull towards 2 (paranoia moving toward tenderness and filling needs). If you are a 9, you will see 6 and 3 in yourself (6 second-guessing during stress and 3 determination once you decide what you want). If you are a 7, you will see 1 and 5. And so on.

I don't doubt I'm a 6, because I am super-ego through and through (ruled by should and attentive to other people's needs), assertiveness and gluttony plays second fiddle to my inner guilt-trips and need to be responsible, and I routinely fall into 3/9 behaviors. So I'm sure. :)

If you are still torn between to types three years into your typing journey, you are either mistyped and working on the wrong things or looking for the wrong type patterns or not introspecting enough to see your type playing out in your thought patterns. Once you land on your type, you will feel a deep sense of shame as you unearth the unconscious patterns that have ruled your life. There is an enormous ego resistance toward accepting the most shameful aspects of your core number; often, people either truly do not identify with those things and assume they are at a high health level (nope) or their pride will not allow them to admit to it and they adamantly deny it as being a problem for them, while doing that exact thing all the time (a fact that is highly visible to others).

Sometimes you will find your type and own this shameful behavior but not that one, but if you commit to introspection and working on yourself, you wear down your ego enough to accept later on that yes, this other shameful thing... I also do this. But by the time that happens and you are willing to face it, it no longer feels as devastating to admit to it.

When torn, ask yourself -- which one am I avoiding and which one am I idolizing more? Which one would bare me in a way that feels deeply uncomfortable? By continuing to feel torn between types and see them as equal, are you refusing to admit to a core weakness?

[stellaferous]

MY GUIDE TO CREATING CHARACTERS

+ tips on creating a cast

@maydaywriting on instagram

my username here is my art account lmao

hello everyone this is my first writing advice post on Tumblr !! ill probably write advice here instead of editing it with nicer fonts behind a nicer background when i'm feeling lazy lol, today's post is about character-creating and i'll be talking about my method of creating characters (funnily enough i sometimes don't even follow my own guide and just do what works), it may not work for you but you may get some inspiration and find your own method instead !

typically, i either come up with a name or a design for the character i have in mind, usually a substance/job/trait will help me visualize what the character will look like/what their name should be:

e.g i have the word "space" in mind, so i either come up with a name that pertains to space (say, Stella) or i doodle down a random design that's space-related (for example, someone wearing saturn earrings, a blue/purple colour scheme, etc) — from there i expand my character and brainstorm more information such as backstory, personality, how they fit into the world, etc. 

i'm an artist so i don't have too much trouble drawing designs i have in my head, though if you need help visualizing your character you can use websites such as picrew to help you ! some people leave the design for last as it's the least of their priority but i personally love designing characters since it helps me come up with ideas to flesh them out + it's a neat way to show instead of tell -- i usually come up with these details while drawing them and i then write down anything that's interesting/important (its quite a messy process)

coming up with names can be tough, you can always choose something simple (like the Stella example i gave) or you could be a bit more creative and come up with a unique name to make your character more memorable — this character is named Minyi or 旻宜 (旻: heaven, 宜: suitable/proper)

you may want to choose a nationality for your character before designing them since it can influence their fashion style. for example, Minyi is Chinese and she is wearing a chinese blouse + a horse face skirt/mamianqun, which is part of hanfu (China's traditional clothing)

next, i put on my thinking cap and ruminate about this character and their important aspects e.g backstory or personality, often using my design/name for assistance: the "yi" in "Minyi" means suitable/proper, so i decide to make her rule-following and organized (you could also do the opposite, you come up with traits of a character and then name them based on those traits !). i then give her more traits after some brainstorming such as kind-hearted, reliable and validation-seeking.

if you need help finding some personality traits to give a character, i suggest you look through the types in a personality test such as MBTI, enneagram, etc – Minyi here is classified as an ISFJ 1w2 !

to go even deeper, i ponder on why she has these personality traits — in other words, the backstory that developed her into having this personality, and this often leads to me fleshing her out even further: she's kind-hearted but validation-seeking, so maybe in her childhood she realizes that she needs to act nice and helpful to receive love (due to neglectful parents suffering from their own problems), and this in turn causes her to become a people-pleaser who relies on external validation. im able to roughly draft a backstory with this idea in mind.

if you're really into making your character more interesting by incorporating trauma/an interesting backstory that made them the way you are, i'd actually suggest studying a little psychology — i genuinely think this helps me write characters better as i have better insight as to why they became that way + it allows me to add little details to their backstory that will help flesh them out more.

moving on, i come up with other information that will develop them such as hobbies and likes/dislikes, and it'd be a good idea to integrate your backstory into these aspects:

for example, Minyi's dad is a martial artist and her mom is a dancer, so she decides to become both these things to seek their validation and be seen as "worthy" in their eyes. i already had the space idea in mind when creating her so her hobbies will obviously be something like stargazing/studying astronomy, though if you didn't follow this route you could have a similar thought process to this: Minyi's parents were neglectful so she was often left alone, she found company in the stars and ended up having an affinity for space, which explains her love for stargazing/studying astronomy.

from here, i like to create a reference sheet where i neatly organize her main traits – and if i'm up to it i tend to develop her even further (even if its unnecessary lmao) by giving her little quirks such as her way of speech (clear and proper), body language (always tries to keep a smile up), and other little fun facts that serve to make her more interesting (she rarely eats sweets and keeps a healthy body, she cracks her knuckles often, she likes wearing traditional clothes, etc).

tips when creating a cast:

diversify your characters: refrain from having them share the same traits to the point that they're more or less the same. since i have a proper, kind-hearted character, i can try creating one who's more feral and cruel

it's important to develop the character's way of speech and body languages when interacting to other characters, some characters will speak the same way to x as they do with y, others will speak differently

try creating some similarities between some characters so they have a reason to become friends: for example, both x and y like gardening and they bond via showing each other the plants they grew, etc – you can also do the opposite and create some differences so they have a reason to dislike each other

if you're in need of more characters but are running out of ideas when it comes to personality/backstory/other, try implementing the types in personality tests (like in MBTI and enneagram), take inspiration from other characters in different media and integrate a trope you like into that character (you can find many tropes on tvtropes !)

and thats it from me ! i hope this post managed to give you inspiration as well as help you create your own characters. i might post more writing advice on tumblr but i think this decision just depends on my mood lmao, if you decide to take any of my advice and post it on instagram, etc please credit me by tagging my account: @maydaywriting