#i like creative writing but i think environmental science is good too and would probably get the best paying job

[am-i-interrupting]

Can I have a Hazbin Hotel matchup, please?

My name is Maria Eduarda, I’m Brazilian, 22 years old, my pronouns are she/her and I study Environmental Science at the College

I’m awful at describing myself, but here we go. I’m introverted, usually I don’t start a conversation with someone else, but I like to chat if other people start talking to me. I'm quite a procrastinator, but so far it hasn't caused me any major problems. I am well organized and responsible with anything that involves other people, I don't want to harm anyone. I work hard at anything that I think will bring me good things in the future, I really like making jokes (even dark humor ones) and I consider myself very loyal to my friends. I am very unassertive in showing what I want and I always give in to avoid conflict. I don't know how to act under pressure (I usually freeze when it happens and I need some help)

Hobbies: video games (Nintendo is my passion), I love to write; currently learning how to make digital art (still being awful at it), also trying to learn how to play piano (this one I’m doing better) and I’m learning to like going to gym

Likes and dislikes: I love Analog Horrors and sci-fi (my favorite series are Doctor Who and Star Trek), I love food, but I hate to cook; I hate when the weather is too hot (it’s weird, since I live in Rio de Janeiro); I hate crowds and I hate the feeling of being left out of something

Your Match Up Is. . .

Charlie!

You met Charlie soon after you came to Hell. Every year after the extermination, she went out to help sinners who’d been injured. You were one of those.

Charlie fell fast and she fell hard. She was enamored by your ability to try so hard to be kind in such a cruel world, rather like herself. She found a sense of relatability in your struggle.

She wrote a long, detailed letter to you about how much she adores your creativity and kindness and loves listening to you talk and playing video games with you and how she has any art you may have given her framed up in random places so no matter where she is if she’s having a bad day she might pass it and think of you. It was, of course, accompanied with sweets and flowers and a promise that it’s absolutely okay if you don’t feel the same way!

Of course, you did feel the same way so that wasn’t a problem.

You help her build up the hotel. You’re more in charge of making things functional and organized while Charlie makes it pretty.

Charlie seems like the type who would know piano or at least know someone who knows (before she met Alastor) so she would absolutely either teach you herself or find someone who could.

She obviously has a music room in the hotel but she does make sure she gets a top quality piano and spends more time searching for that than anything else.

She will join you in the gym. . . She will ogle at you while you work out in the gym.

She loved being with you wherever you are so you’ll never have to be alone unless you want to and she invites you everywhere.

Of course, if there’s an event she has to go to and it’s crowded and you want to leave, she will find a way to make sure you can leave early together but if you want to leave by yourself go ahead. She’ll catch up as soon as she can.

You two spend a lot of nights curled up on a couch or in bed watching tv shows.

She asks you so many questions about the ones you pick.

She’s also not scared of the horror movies because well. . . She grew up in Hell. There’s probably not a lot she hasn’t seen.

She will pretend like she is though just so you’ll hold her close.

[shokobuns]

Jean (AoT) and Megumi (JJK) for the studying shitposts, please!

GOD TURN IT UP!!! I AM FUCKINF EXCITED!!!!

JEAN KIRSTEIN — okay, this man took honors physics and got an A and it is the only class he studied hard for because the rest he just did his assignments and missed an average of five small ones a year. he also took ap stats senior year and got a B, but then got a 5 in the exam. i also feel like he took honors pre calc his junior year and absolutely fucking hated it and passed the final with a C, but then passed the class with a B. if he was american, he would have taken apush and probably got a 4 on the exam. the easiest classes for him were ap world history and military history, barely studied, was probably genuinely interested in it and that’s how he passed with an A without studying. one of those kids that got a temporary ww2/ussr phase LMAO, but then also interested in ancient fucking rome for some reason?? was approached by a fucking MILITARY RECRUITER multiple times, but he’s trying to awkwardly shake them off like mans does not want the PTSD. he’s also one of those kids that did PE casually, they’d be like “run a mile” and he’s like “ight” and gets a 6-7 minute mile with those long ass legs and barely sweats. basically, average A and B student with some interests. maybe joined a sport, but not one that his school was known for. the girls he pulls range from lowkey weeb/kpop stan to girls who are usually into super athletic football players, but he just doesn’t say anything about it and they do offer him up their homework nfdksjnds

MEGUMI FUSHIGURO — listen he is the quiet kid in your history class, probably an ap history class, too, that you HIGHKEY CRUSH ON. he’s just sittin there in the classroom and he zones out so much like at first he’s kind of paying attention like “cool this lecture is about china and britain” and then he daydreams about something and all of the sudden he snaps back and the teacher is like “THE OPIUM WAR” and it’s like ahhhhhh!!!! either got around a low B or a C because he does not like writing history essays, mans hates DBQs, but the multiple choice section got him up to a 4 on the exam. took honors chemistry, was confused, but eventually figure stuff out and got either a B or a low A. a teacher definitely pressured him to take an ib science class and he was like “uhhhhh” and they were like “DO IT” and that’s how megumi took ib environmental science. his ia is simple, probably grew some plants for it, and he didn’t think that the short answer questions on tests were that bad. ended with a 6 and most of his review was probably watching videos. his studying habits aren’t the best, he definitely had 20 missing assignments in honors chem that he turned in right before the semester ended for partial credit because he fucking hates busy work. the highest math he went to was pre calc because calculus? hell no, he has other shit to do. DID SUPER GOOD IN ENGLISH BECAUSE OF THE TRAUMA, but the only advanced english classes he took were ap lang, where he got a 3 on the exam, and then erwc where he got an A because it let him do more creative writing. and also because he used to beat up assholes, he is POPULAR for MILITARY RECRUITER INSISTENCE. one look, BECAUSE HE LOOKS KIND OF SCARY, and all of the sudden us navy, the usmc, air force, etc. are dming him on fucking instagram like “ARE YOU INTERESTED IN JOINING-” but mans leaves them on read like a boss bitch. 

[ainti-pretty]

hello!! if u want to for the thronebreaker college au, what does everyone study or what do u think their karaoke night songs would be? <3

THANK U!!!

ill only do this for the main characters bc. theres a lot of ppl.

starting off with majors/minors:

meve: double majors in political science and history with a prelaw track

gascon: premed with a dance minor focusing in ballet

reynard: professional writing and international relations double major with prelaw track

eldain: music major (focusing on voice), and an art history minor

isengrim: business major, but hes trying to do biochemistry instead.

geralt: hes an equine studies major (horses) and also does premed to be a vet

yennefer: business and international relations double major

saskia: international relations major with creative writing minor

ves: chemistry major! she also wants to minor in anthropology

iorveth: environmental studies major with a music minor (flute) and a prelaw track

roche: studio art (focus on painting) and engineering double major with a prelaw track. dont ask him what he wants to do with his life...he doesnt know either.

okay so I Think I hit everyone!

now onto karaoke! (under the cut)

meve: she would probably do a duet with reynard just to convince him to do it (see below) but if solo she would do call me maybe for the meme. and also as a hint to a few pining dumbasses

gascon: wonderwall.

reynard: good luck getting him to sing in front of people... but meve would ask him to sing a duet with her. itd be the start of something new from high school musical.

eldain: to flex his brilliant voice or wtv, hed probably sing good old fashioned lover boy by queen. the worst part is that he actual does it very well so no one can hate him for flexing

isengrim: dont you want me baby by the human league. he does surprisingly well

geralt: once again, good luck getting him to sing. he would not, and for good reason too....

yennefer: shed sing sweet dreams are made of these as a meme, but shed sound REALLY good.

saskia and ves: would do chiquitita by abba as a duet and it would be EXCELLENT.

iorveth: he wouldnt sing but hed play my heart will go on from titanic on his flute.

roche: ves would bully him into singing and he would panic and make ves chose. he gets stuck singing man i feel like a woman once, and after that he just choses orville peck songs or something vaguely depressing.

WELL. that was quite long! there are so many characters and I hope my decisions have stayed true to their personalities! thank you so much for asking and feel free to send more!

[wildbootsappeared]

Continental Divides Chapter Discussion #0: Humble Origins/Editing and Rewriting

I recently enjoyed hearing Negrek talk about the behind-the-scenes of the most recent chapter of Salvage and was inspired: I figure some of you might be interested in hearing some of that type of thing for Divides, too. CD touches on some pretty complicated subjects (historical events and politics and glazed-over-science) that are worth teasing apart a little more. So I’m going to start slowly adding in some chapter reflection posts! Keep in mind that these will probably be full of spoilers, and you’ll want to get caught up before you read em. 

If you want to hear me talk about something specific, feel free to shoot me a question.

(By the way, if you’re not reading Salvage yet—fam, get on my level. I’d describe it as a black humor odd-couple tale of … friendship??? Hm, that’s definitely not the right word, is it? Anyway! Featuring: an absolute goblin of a pokemorph, dismemberment, corruption, and Very Good Decisions. And lovely prose, by the way.)

With that, let’s get into it!

(CD spoilers below!)

Art by Giulia Bernardelli 

From Humble Origins

I’ve mentioned before that Mark and Natalie were my first original characters. They were side characters in my first ever fic from … god, 2003 or 2004-ish? So in many ways, they’ve grown up with me.

I learned about fanfic shortly after Ruby and Sapphire came out in the US, so of course baby OSJ had to try her hand at a Hoenn journey fic. I’m really sad that I don’t have a copy of the original text anymore because it was hilariously bad. You see, Brendan and May had to run away from home (instead of just … journeying like every other trainer?) because they were IN LOVE (after, like, a day and a half at most) but their parents WOULDN’T LET THEM BE TOGETHER. The story featured dazzling moments of creative genius like … Brendan and May “sneaking” into Rustboro at the wee hour of 10 am, whereupon May ran into a lamp post somehow. 

Later, Mark and Natalie appear to yell at our poor heroes and then at each other. Lots of yelling. In their first inception, Mark and Nat were basically discount Jesse and James but with less dress-up and queer subtext. Mark had a glorious moment of running while dragging his feet (?). Also, during a double battle against Brendan and May, I forgot about his zubat, so it fainted because “it was tired from flying,” despite having no feet and despite taking zero hits during the fight. Then Mark took shelter from the rain under a tree, where Natalie yelled at him some more and decided for both of them that they had to team up “temporarily” to get the red and blue orbs back from those meddling kids or something. I had grand plans for this whole plot where Natalie would kidnap May to get the orbs, but then May would end up in Magma’s hands (like a human hot potato), and Brendan would have to rescue her??? Something, something, Mark and Natalie see the error of their ways and team up to help Brendan and May … do stuff?

Anyway, I never finished it, and that’s definitely for the best.

I did revisit Mark and Natalie a few years later, though, this time for a story of their own called Out of Hand. I didn’t finish that one either, but I do have the original text this time (plus snarky comments and a “review” from me ten years after the fact). I can’t honestly tell you it was … good. Maybe good-for-a-highschooler. But! When I stumbled upon it again in 2018, there was enough in it that almost worked that I started to think about how I’d handle those themes and characters as an adult.

A lot has changed since then, but that 2010 draft of Out of Hand established some of the skeleton of Continental Divides. For example, that was when Archie became Natalie’s brother to help explain how she got involved in Aqua. I decided to keep that structure because it was a good way to let Natalie start as a neutral party/reader proxy and then quickly become embroiled in the conflict. It was also the first time Mark’s sister appeared, though I don’t think I’d decided what to do with her at the time except to use her as decorations in his angsty dreams, haha. His smoking habit also started in 2010. I, too, thought he’d quit “years ago,” in literal real time. Jokes on me—it turned out to be a useful way to signal the start of him losing control, the negative influence of Cora/Magma in his life, his hypocrisy, and his guilty feelings about things he’s burned. Scarlet appeared for the first time in this draft, too. I think I was equal parts trying to humanize Archie and to write my way through feelings about growing apart from/pining for someone. Her backstory took up a disproportionate number of pages in the old draft, but I liked the idea of keeping her around as a figure who could complicate Natalie’s relationship with Aqua and with Archie. The 2010 has  a couple fights between Mark and Natalie that I respect for bringing real danger to the protagonists ... but also can’t help laughing at. They literally fight until they tumble over a waterfall, like a cartoon. Silly as those scenes are, you can also see how they laid a foundation for scenes like the fight in Chapter 9.

CD is basically me responding to Out of Hand with, “I see you and I raise you.” 

2010-OSJ had some vague feelings about inequality and environmentalism, but none of it was very well thought-out. She mostly wanted to tell an enemies-to-lovers story, in part because she thought she was living in one IRL. Nowadays, I’ve got a lot of feelings about climate change, political divisions, activism and responsibility, corporations, policing, and whether or not violence is a good answer to certain kinds of questions. Hoenn is a safe space to explore those feelings. (It’s got pokemon, so it’s inherently more fun, right???) 

Kyogre and Groudon are such obvious parallels to sea level rise/more intense storms and rising temperatures/wildfires respectively that I couldn’t resist. And in Magma/Aqua I see a lot of parallels to political conflicts happening in the US right now. The far left and the far right don’t share a vision of what a “better world” would look like, but they do share a mutual mistrust of “the swamp” and all the ways the government tag-teams with corporations to dunk on ordinary people. I’d love to believe that someday we could team up across the aisle to fight corruption together. It’s certainly hard to imagine how we could get to a better world with one half of the country pitted against each other … Something has got to give eventually, probably not peacefully. 

My versions of Magma and Aqua aren’t exact parallels to the US political left and right—both are pretty left-leaning, for one—but I still find a lot of hope in the idea of two enemies from rival factions learning to (eventually) care for one another and work together towards common goals. At the very least, it’s something I can manifest and control on the page, and that makes me feel better about all the things I can’t control.

Editing and Rewriting

My first attempt at Continental Divides was inarguably an improvement on earlier versions of Mark and Natalie … but it still took quite a bit of rewriting to get to the draft that’s available to read now. The first draft in 2018 opened with what’s now Chapter 3, the protest in Rustboro. I had the right idea with “starting at the beginning,” but starting with an action scene was the wrong move: we didn’t know enough about Natalie to care when she was in trouble or to understand why she was making any of those choices. Moreover, even though the political content is important, this is ultimately still an enemies-to-lovers story: the beginning needed to center Mark and Natalie’s relationship. You know, to establish some interest before it all implodes. The next attempt ran a little long, though, and the current version condenses their initial meeting and Nat’s backstory much better. Maybe the next time I start a new project I’ll have an easier time knowing what makes a good starting point, but this time there was a lot of swinging back and forth to find a balance.

If you’re interested in seeing how my first chapter changed over time, you can see that here.

I’m really happy to have a first chapter I know is a solid representation of the subject matter, tone, and writing level of the later chapters. Getting stuck in an editing loop is a real danger … but if you’re ever going to edit part of your fic, let it be the first chapter. A good first chapter is critical to keeping potential readers onboard. I can tell from feedback that I’ve stuck the landing now.

Hope you enjoyed this not-so-little reflection on the origins of this story!

Some music (Spotify links):

Night of the Long Knives - Everything Everything

MMMMHMMMMM - Four Fists

[fallxnprxnce]

PSA: Activity Update & Future of This Blog

{out of exile} *folds hands on desk and looks at camera* Alright. Let’s talk frankly about my rather long-term inactivity on this blog. I am still alive, heh, and I want to just explain a few things so everyone knows where I’m at with this blog.

I hope I still have some followers on here still and I apologize for the complete lack of activity on here in the past several months. I know you have heard this all before, and the truth is that I did not want to let go of Nuada as a muse despite not having much inspiration to write him lately. I still am not shutting down this blog (I can’t, it’s my main on this account and all other rp blogs of mine are sides of this one, heh), but I will need to do things differently going forward. I should have put this blog on hiatus but I honestly didn’t think I would be this inactive and for this long, so I dropped the ball on that. I am very sorry.

First of all, my inactivity has been largely due to these three reasons:

I have a lack of muse for Nuada. It has been a while since I had have muse for him, but I think I might know a big reason why. I will explain more in my plans for this blog once I explain the other two reasons for my inactivity.

I have overwhelming Marvel muse instead. I have three Marvel rp blogs now after getting caught up on a lot of the movies, and I am really enjoying a lot of muse, creativity, and just general love of writing them. I am active daily on @thiscrimsonsoul​ (Wanda Maximoff) and @fasterthanmydemons​ (Pietro Maximoff), and am active semi-daily on @notbigondoors​ (Vision). If you want to rp with me, interact via asks, send in memes, ask about headcanons, and all that fun stuff I used to do on this blog, heh, I am very responsive over on those blogs. That’s where the bulk of my roleplaying on Tumblr has been since around May. So feel free to interact with me and my muses over on those blogs if you like Marvel or have a Marvel muse!

Work being unexpectedly challenging this past summer and right now. For those who don’t know, I teach online environmental science classes for a university. Usually my summer classes are low key, easy, quiet, a breeze. This summer... was horrible. The students really did nothing they were supposed to do, there were so many technical issues, it was a mess. Then, as of the beginning of September, we switched online platforms for the class, so I have had to completely re-learn a lot of things that were second nature to me and that I used to be able to do very quickly. The result is that this has seriously eaten into my free time in an unanticipated way. So I am sorry that I promised more activity over the summer, but it just didn’t happen. And right now, work is kindof kicking my ass, heh.

Alright, so that’s why this blog has been pretty dead lately. Now let’s talk about where we go from here. If I do still have anyone following me that loves Nuada, still wants to interact, and is not totally furious with me for my low activity and poor time management with this blog, I do still want to keep this blog going. However, one of the reasons I think my muse for him is suffering is because this blog is kindof a mess. Specifically, my threads and drafts. I have 96 drafts for Nuada, and most of them are not pictures and memes, they’re threads. So many of these threads are with people who have deactivate, changed their blogs, no longer want to rp, or maybe some who do, but the threads are so old that at this point going back to them is such a daunting task. It’s a mental block for me that is really holding me back.

I cannot scrape this blog and make another because, as I said up there, this is my main on this account. But I think giving it an aesthetic overhaul will help... and the other thing that I know will help is starting from scratch with threads. I have hesitated to do this for so long because I thought it would really upset people, but I think I need to do it to clear my head, and at this point my inactivity has probably infuriated so many of you that I am not sure how many rp partners I even still have on here. So I think it’s time to do it. Therefore, I am officially announcing that I will be clearing out Nuada’s drafts with intent to start new ones with everyone. If there are any threads that anyone is absolutely in love with or threads that have been started more recently that didn’t get beyond an introduction stage, message me and maybe we can keep a couple of those, but for the most part, everything is getting nixed. I want a fresh start. =) I will be revamping the blog right after I finish a little project I’m now going to talk more about, because I’m sure some of you are reading to hear about that... 

Okay... almost done with this long post, heh. The other thing you are all probably wonder about: The “Nuada in Silent Hill” fanfic I was writing... Is that still a thing? Is it still going to happen? Yes, and yes. I will be honest, I did not have much time to work on it over the entire summer. I did here and there, but I just didn’t have the time. However, having said that, it is almost finished. I am up to the ending and I want to have it done soon. After that I will just need some time to read for typos, continuity, all that good stuff, and then I can start posting it in various places. So yes, it is still happening, and we’re getting close, people, I promise. XD I really like the way it’s turning out, and I hope you will like it too when you read it. I still have that post where I asked everyone to like it if they wanted to be notified when the fanfic was posted, but since it’s been a while, if you want to go ahead and like this post as well if you are interested in a notification, feel free to do so. I am compiling a master list of people to notify when I get it posted.

If you have any questions about anything, you want to contact me about any of our threads to save, or you have any other comments, concerns, or suggestions, I am here. =) Hit my Marvel blogs up in the meantime, though, because like I said, I am active daily on most of those.

Love you guys! Happy rping! =D

[petroglifs]

Grayshaw

*Enjoy!

Science Fiction Book Club

Interview with Bruce Sterling October 2018

Bruce Sterling is a prominent science fiction writer and a pioneer of the cyberpunk genre. Novels like Heavy Weather (1994), Islands in the Net (1988), Schismatrix (1985), The Artificial Kid (1980) earned him the nickname “Chairman Bruce”. Apart from his writings, Bruce Sterling is also a professor of internet studies and science fiction at the European Graduate School. He has contributed to several projects within the scheme of futurist theory, founded an environmental aesthetic movement, edited anthologies and he still continues to write for several magazines including Wired, Discover, Architectural Record and The Atlantic.

David Stuckey: Have you considered a return to the world of "The Difference Engine" for stories or another novel?

*That won’t happen.

David Stuckey: If you were going to write "Involution Ocean" today, what would you change or do differently?

*Well, alien planet adventures are a really dated form of space opera.  On the other hand, they’re great when you’re 20 years old.  If I were doing a project like that today I might make it a comic book.  Or a webcomic.  It might make a nice anime cartoon.

Richard Whyte: In the 2018 'State of the World' conversation on the Well, you said you were in Ibiza working on a novel. Are you able to tell us anything about it yet?

*I dunno if I’m ever gonna finish this epic novel about the history of the city of Turin, but I seem to get a lot of work done on it when I’m in Ibiza.  It’s about Turin, but when I’m actually in Turin I tend to work on weird technology art projects and goofy design schemes.

*Also, look at this palace.  I’m supposed to work on my novel in the attic of this villa.  That’s pretty weird, isn’t it?  This villa was built in the same era as the book I’m working on, which has the working title “The Starry Messengers.”  Like this villa, it’s big and baroque and complicated.

https://fenicerinnovata.tumblr.com

Andrzej Wieckowski: We read 'Sacred Cow' for one of our short story reads a few months' ago. Were themes such as Bolton's historic connection to the Indian cotton industry and immigration to this country deliberate or unconscious? And as it's my home town - did you visit? :)

*There aren’t any towns in Britain without some historic connection to India.  As it happens I’m flying to India day after tomorrow to meet with some Indian science fiction writers.

*I used to hang out in Great Britain rather a lot.  Brexitania I don’t much care for.  It’s a hostile, troubled place.

Gary Denton: You were active in the Viridian sustainable design movement that many readers may not know about. Do you think that major corporations have taken that over and it is less fringe now?

*I tend to do activist stuff.  Also, you get more done if you don’t ask for any credit.  I’ve come to understand that a lot of my most influential writing was stuff that I never got paid for.  Some of it never got published.

*I was just at the Whole Earth 50th reunion about a week ago.  They’re a good example of a “movement” that was super-influential and somehow a dreadful failure at the same time.

*As far as major corporations, meaning large public enterprises with a lot of shareholders, I don’t worry about them any more.  It’s actually moguls and oligarchs who are the big problem nowadays.

Gary Denton: Do you also see a change in the major polluters now compared to 25 years ago?

*They’re a lot more violent.  Blood for oil, killing off opponents in sinister ways, not a problem for them any more.  They’re quite grim and red-handed.  They used to be engineers, but now they know that they are culprits.

Gary Denton: You once said that the cyberpunks were the most realistic science fiction writers in the 80's. Who do you think are the most realistic science fiction writers now?

*Could be the Chinese.

Richard Whyte: Whenever someone here asks about the angriest SF work ever, I always seem to end up recommending your fine short story 'Spook'. Do you think of it as an angry story?

*Well, not really.  It’s a rather severely disaffected story from the point of view of a person who’s not human and knows it.  “We See Things Differently” is rather an angry story; it’s about a terrorist assassin with a righteous grudge.

Eva Sable: What is the experience of collaborating with another author like for you? Especially when working with someone who, like yourself, is rather an individual. (Never met William Gibson, but he strikes me as someone who would be more comfortable working on his own)

*I tend to collaborate rather a lot.  It helps if the two of you are combining forces in order to learn something together.  Gibson and I agreed that we couldn’t possibly write a work like DIFFERENCE ENGINE alone.  We used to urge each other to do it, but eventually we just had to have a lot of long, abstruse discussions of what a book like that ought to do.

*If you read the stories I wrote with Rudy Rucker you can see that a lot of those texts are basically him and me discussing weird ideas.  We’ve got a reason to write those stories – a high-concept, and then there are pages of bizarre hugger-mugger where we push the concept as hard as we can.  Then we give up.

*Nowadays I spend a lot of time negotiating or collaborating with artists, designers, architects.  I don’t get jealous about the origins of good ideas.

Richard Whyte: Your 1980s SF criticism seemed very much in favour of 'Radical Hard SF'. To what extent do you think your own fiction 'takes its inspiration from science, and uses the language of science in a creative way'?

*I wrote a lot of that in the 1980s.  Nowadays I tend to write speculative work that’s more influenced by industrial design rather than by science.

Richard Whyte: In the early 1980s I believe you were associated with a group of like-minded SF writers known as 'The Movement', who were subsequently renamed as 'cyberpunks'. Overall, do you think this name change was a good or a bad thing?

*If people notice you, you’re gonna get a public slang name anyway, so it’s good if you can cheerfully put up with it.  As for forming like-minded groups, that’s a valuable life-skill.

John Grayshaw: Who are your favorite science fiction writers? And how have they influenced your work?

*Well, those favorites change with time.  In different decades of my own life I’ve had different ambitions for my own science fiction.  I tend to write pastiches.  Lately I’ve been writing a lot of “science fiction” that’s heavily influenced by Italian fantascienza, or, really, Italian fantasy generally.  

*I’m a long-time Juies Verne fan.  I wouldn’t describe Jules as a personal “favorite,” but I recognize him as a titan of my genre.  Knowing the personal details of the guy’s career as a working creative has been of a lot of help to me.

*I had a couple of professional SF writers who I regarded as my literary mentors.  They’re both dead now: Harlan Ellison and Brian Aldiss.

John Grayshaw: I heard that you are currently dividing your time between Belgrade and Turin, do you miss living in Texas? Or America in general?

*I’m back often enough that I don’t really “miss it.”  I find that if I stay in one place too long, I tend to miss travelling.  I  roam a lot.  If I get too old and tired to lift a suitcase and I settle somewhere, it probably won’t be Austin, Belgrade or Turin.

John Grayshaw: I recommend everyone read your essay "Cyberpunk in the Nineties" (http://lib.ru/STERLINGB/interzone.txt) to understand that Cyberpunk was a movement and can't be removed from its time and place...But a Cyberpunk aesthetic has emerged over the years and that is what writers like Neal Stephenson or Richard K. Morgan are emulating. Was this aesthetic conscious at the time?

*Well, we spent plenty of time fussing about it. A lot of that conceptual work doesn’t really show on the surface.  Aesthetics interest me a lot.  For instance, I’m the Art Director of the Share Festival in Turin, which is an Italian technology-art fair.  Italians are good at fussing about how stuff looks.

John Grayshaw: Did "Mirrorshades" have a theme? What directions or guidance did you give the writers?

*It didn’t have a set theme.  Mostly I was trying to pick work from colleagues I respected, that I thought put them in a good light.

John Grayshaw: Other than writing what are your interests/hobbies?

*I like design and technology art. Also I travel a lot.  I spend a lot of time in arcane online research.

John Grayshaw: Why do you think Steampunk has become a popular subgenre/aesthetic in the last 30 years?

*I think it’s about the craft aspects of steampunk.  Hobbyist people like the costumes and the gadgets.  It’s like traditional historical recreation groups, but with an alluring fantasy aspect.

John Grayshaw: Can you explain why you have said that Artificial Intelligence is a bad metaphor?

*I think the AI metaphor gets in the way of actual progress in the field, with actual hardware and software.  Rodney Brooks explains the problem a lot better than I can, and nobody can understand his explanations either.  That’s not exactly fair – actually I get what Rodney’s saying enough to more or less agree with him.  He’s an expert, so I’d refer you to him.

*”Deep Learner” and “neural net” are kinda better metaphors than “Artificial Intelligence,” but they’re still metaphors.  We haven’t created sharp, focused words for what these odd devices really do. “Intelligence” is not what they’re doing.

John Grayshaw: Cyberpunk was a dark look at the future. Do you feel optimistic or pessimistic about the future?

*People always ask that.  People in Russia never thought that cyberpunk was “dark.”  Also, whenever you get to “the future,” no matter how scared or happy you are about some particular historical episode, there’s always more future on the way.  Eventually people are dead, so if you ask  if I’m optimistic or pessimistic about the 20th century,  the whole idea sounds silly.  The future is a kind of history that hasn’t happened yet.

John Grayshaw: In cyberpunk technology often contributes to society’s ills. What lesson do we take from this? That we must learn how to live with tech or that we should reject it and live like the Amish?

*Kevin Kelly kinda likes the idea of living like the Amish.  Kevin’s an interesting guy.  If I myself wanted to “live like the Amish” I’d probably move to Christiania in Denmark, where at least they have reggae music.

John Grayshaw: Do you keep up with the latest technologies? Or do you stay "off the grid?"

*I do both, actually.  I’m generally so “off the grid” that I’m not even in its time-zone.  I don’t have a business card, there’s no  settled mailing address, I’m never on Facebook, and no one knows my phone number.  Like they say in the world of electronic privacy, “I have nothing to hide, but I have nothing I want to show you, either.”

John Grayshaw: Do you think people will have "immersive" VR type experiences on the internet in the next 20 years?

*They have it already.

John Grayshaw: What do you feel is your legacy?

*Hard to say.  It’s like asking a Beatnik writer what “his legacy” is.  The Beats wrote a lot of more-or-less memorable stuff, but there’s also the existence proof that somebody was able to live like that, and that is their legacy.  I lived in a different historical period than the Beat writiers, but a lot of the stuff that entertained and engaged me is also quite archaic nowadays.  I don’t thing people aspire to emulate Bruce Sterling, but they  do like the idea of operating in the same cultural spaces that I do.  That something lively can exist between “science” and “fiction,” or between “cyber” and “punk,” that’s a valuable thing to know.

[musicmajor]

Hey I’m a sophomore in high school and I’m interested in being a music major, I’ve been doing music since third grade, and I was wondering what it takes? What kind of grades do you need for you to get it and what’s it like when you’re there? Thanks!

hey! thanks for the question. this response is going to be super rambly because I’m in the midst of a 2-exam and bibliography nightmare lol, but here’s what I know:

so I went to a liberal arts college not super well known for its music program, but I thought I had some really excellent music professors. I’m not a super great source to talk about high school grades for college admission, I was homeschooled from 4th grade through high school. I know not all music majors come from great grades but if you do have good grades it’ll set you apart a bit and get you more scholarships. The scholarships a lot of times are based on your grades + test scores (SAT/ACT) + AP credits I think. I took like one AP course in high school because I didn’t know how they worked and I got the lowest possible academic scholarship for my SAT score, which was decent. (I didn’t take the ACT because I didn’t know what I was doing. The second child in my family just took a practice ACT at age 15. we’re leaning lol) But my actual music audition was good and I got a $7,000 scholarship from that (my scholarships repeated each year so long as I got decent grades!). 

Life in music school: you have a lot of classes and a lot of work. Between classes and lessons and rehearsals you have way more classes than your non-music peers, sometimes as many as 5-6 classes in one day. you basically stay on campus all day unless you live right by the music building (if possible, try to live right by the music building.) It’s worse if you’re an education major (I was a performance major). Plus then you have to practice and do homework and yes you do have to write papers and do research and learn like 3 different citation styles and do oral presentations some times. At a liberal arts school I had to take a handful of non-music classes which was cool, that’s how I ended up taking classes about LGBT stuff and women’s, gender, and sexuality studies (what I minored in) as well as finding out I really like science. I took environmental physics (did you know electricity is created by burning fossil fuels because I did not before this class, and also I briefly understood how electricity works), and geology (rocks), and I took field botany. I didn’t have to take math because electronic music counted as the math requirement at my school :) :) 

so I would say, (coming from someone who didn’t go to high school) music school is hard. I think it would have been easier for me to get a degree in science or philosophy than getting a degree in music. if you can learn music theory, ear training, piano, and/or the basics of music history before going, that will help you. I went in already knowing music theory and basic piano and that helped a LOT. however I personally thought going to college overall was way easier than being homeschooled because my mom had been giving me coursework that was probably too difficult, and suddenly I had a better method of structuring my work and forcing me to turn things in on time and not get behind. and I graduated with a 3.99 GPA (I got an A- in physics lol). but even if you decide not to become a musician later, or want to switch fields (like I’m about to do after I get my masters in teaching violin) the skills you will have learned in music school are excellent and will help you with whatever you want to do.

also fyi: it’s very difficult to double-major in music performance or education with something else and still graduate in 4 years. most people I know who did a double major with these graduated in 4.5 - 5 years. I went in planning to double major in creative writing and that did not happen. but you can minor in something else, or you can minor in music. Or at my school they also had a bachelor of the arts degree in music which had fewer requirements and that is doable as a double major. so you have options! if you (or anyone else) have any more specific questions feel free to send them in. or add on to this post with your music school thoughts. 

[amillionsmiles]

like we’re made of starlight (Peter/Lara Jean)

Summary: “Lara Jean, you’re a person before anything else.  I stopped having a perfect image of you in my head a long time ago.” / Peter and Lara Jean go camping in December to catch the Geminids.  Oneshot. A/N: squeaking by and getting this in before the new year, whoo!  belated bday fic for @adribug .  I’m a little rusty writing for these two but I hope you enjoy some couple fluff >.<

[Read and review here] or continue under the cut.

I have this theory about love.

It involves layers—so that a relationship might have its gooey childhood phase, and then its teenage years, and if you're lucky you eventually get to the sweet, solid outer coating of an adult kind of love.

"Like an onion," Peter says, the first time I bring this up.

I frown. "I was thinking more like… candy. Like a tootsie pop. Or…" I look out the window, to where the dense green forest blurs by, a solid backdrop behind the other cars whizzing down the highway. "Or tree rings. So if you sliced a relationship, you'd be able to see its stages of growth. And the deeper the feelings, the wider the ring. Or maybe width should be determined by the length of time…" I'm puzzling through the specifics of my metaphor now, wondering what my relationship with Peter would look like, if it were documented in tree rings.

"Like that lab we did in environmental science," Peter says, drumming his fingers on the steering wheel.

I feel a bit bad that he's driving, especially since he already drove four hours to pick me up from school. "Y'all are gross," my friend Marcie said when we found him waiting at the Old Well. Marcie's like that. I introduced her to Peter the first time he came to visit, back in early October; she gave him a hard time then, but I could tell it was because she was testing him. By the end of the day, he'd definitely passed.

Today, we spent some time walking around so Peter could stretch his legs and eat a late lunch, and then it was back in the car. There's supposed to be a big meteor shower tonight—the Geminids—and Peter and I thought it'd be fun to actually camp out to see them, in the woods with a tent and everything. We made reservations at Jones Lake State Park, which is about two hours away. I couldn't have planned it more perfectly; our schedules are both wide open because of Reading Day, though I still have two finals coming up later this week, and Peter has one.

I offered to drive, but Peter had to take the van in order to fit our camping gear, and I'm not as good at handling bigger cars. I make up for it by feeding Peter bites of the special sandwiches I prepared: muffaleta with an olive-oregano-onion mix, pepperoni, prosciutto, and provolone. As Peter pulls away, chewing, several crumbs stick to the corner of his mouth.

"So where are we in all of this?" he asks.

"What?"

"You said there was teenage love and then there was 'adult love.' Which one are we?"

I consider. We're both technically adults, in the barest sense of the word, and I can see how a semester at college has already changed us. College Peter has gotten more muscular from all his lacrosse practice. He moves with less swagger—not in a bad way, but as if he doesn't have as much to compensate for. It's a quieter kind of confidence, which I like.

But then, of course, there are all the ways that College Peter is exactly the same. He still calls me at night, right before either of us falls asleep. He still smells like Dove soap, the soft, clean boy-scent I've come to associate with comfort, and he still makes my heart beat fast when he looks over with that crooked smile of his, the light from the dying sun catching in his eyes.

I tap a finger against my lips and smile back, considering.

"I'm still figuring out," I say.

*.*.*.*

We get to the park an hour before closing.

Loose sticks and gravel crunch under our tires as we pull into our campsite. I'm out of the car as soon as Peter parks, marveling at our view.

"Peter, look, isn't it gorgeous?" We're right by the shore of the lake; in front of me stretch the placid waters, like a mirror of the sky. The surface is so still it looks like glass—I feel like if I throw a pebble at it, I'll shatter something.

Peter grunts as he starts to unload our equipment. I hurry to help him. The food takes some time to get organized. Even though it's just the two of us, I wanted the full experience, so I bought all the ingredients for s'mores. Then there are the sandwiches I made for us to eat for dinner, with plenty of extras because I know Peter will get hungry. Finally, the burritos I prepared for breakfast tomorrow, wrapped neatly in foil so that we can just heat them over the fire.

The tent takes a little more work, but we get it finished in time to watch the sunset. The meteors aren't expected to become visible until 7:30 PM, and they probably won't be at their peak until well past that, so Peter and I entertain ourselves with a puzzle and a deck of cards. I've recently started watching magic tricks on YouTube and figure that Peter's a good a person to try them out on, mostly because I know how to distract him.

All in all, things are going well, up until I need to use the restroom and remember that we're in the middle of nowhere.

When I bring this up, Peter looks unconcerned. "Just go in the woods, Lara Jean, haven't you ever been camping before?"

"Of course I have!" Twice. "But it's all dark and cold outside, and the trees are too far apart. I'll feel exposed."

"There's nobody around. And you'll be out in the open for five minutes, tops."

"Easy for you to say, you're a boy. You can just—" I pantomime the motion with my hands, which makes Peter redden slightly. His eyes dart around the tent, looking anywhere but at my face. After a beat, he heaves a sigh and gets to his feet, grabbing his fleecy orange and blue Cavaliers blanket.

"What are you doing?" I stare at him blankly.

Peter stares right back. "Coming with you. I'll hold up the blanket as a screen so you can do your…" he gestures aimlessly, "…business."

"Oh." My voice goes small. "Well, that's okay—"

Too late. Peter has a hand on the small of my back now and uses it to usher me out of the tent. I barely manage to grab the bag of wet wipes before we're both out in the cold, tucking our chins against our necks and hunching over to keep warm. Peter sets the pace; meanwhile, I stumble after him with the flashlight, casting a wobbly yellow beam on the ground in front of us.

Camping out in a cozy tent under the stars in order to catch a meteor shower? Romantic. Having your boyfriend accompany you into the woods so that you don't have to pee alone in the dark? Admittedly less so.

"Is this good?" Peter stops and looks back at me, gesturing toward a copse of trees. If I squint, I can make out the light of our campfire in the distance, but we're far enough away that if I shut off the flashlight we'll be plunged into relative darkness. I do that now, handing over the flashlight to Peter and fumbling blindly with all my layers. Margot taught me that it helps to find a thin tree trunk to hold onto for balance—then you can sit back just like you'd do at home.

Behind me, there's a rustle: Peter holding up his makeshift blanket-screen.

"Don't look!" I hiss.

"I can't see anything to begin with," Peter argues, but I know he probably has his eyes squeezed shut anyways. The air is biting cold against my skin, the woods eerily quiet, and I'm suddenly self-conscious. It's a weird feeling, to be made vulnerable by something so—mundane, as Margot would call it.

"Can you also, like—cover your ears?"

"Lara Jean," Peter says, and it's in his I'm trying very hard to be patient voice. "Look, you're a person before anything else. I stopped having a perfect image of you in my head a long time ago. Just pee."

I pause. "That's… actually really sweet, Peter."

"Always the tone of surprise," Peter grumbles, but I can tell he's pleased.

We know each other well, that way.

*.*.*.*

"Remember the poem you gave me junior year, for Valentine's Day?"

I say this with my ear pressed against Peter's chest, trying to hear his heartbeat through the puffy jacket he's wearing. From this angle, it's easy to pretend we're in a snowglobe—the sky seems to curve over us like a dome, the stars suspended like tiny flakes of glitter. Peter shifts to put his hand behind his head.

"The moon never beams without bringing me dreams / Of beautiful Lara Jean. / And stars never rise but I feel the bright eyes / of beautiful Lara Jean," he recites. "I'm still flattered that you thought I could come up with that, even for a second."

"It's not too late to start trying now," I say, batting my eyelashes at him.

Peter laughs. I like that I can feel the rumble of it right against my cheek, all warm and chocolatey. He's been fiddling with my hair—one of his fingers gets caught in a snag and he untangles it gently, the way Kitty taught him how. I file that gesture away. When I have a daughter, I'll tell her: it's important to be with someone who has careful hands.

"Maybe I'll take a creative writing class next semester," muses Peter. "And then I really will write you an actual poem."

"I'll keep it framed in my room if you do," I tell him seriously.

"Speaking of rooms, you never ended up helping me decorate mine, by the way. It needs some of your…" His hand flails. "Pizzazz."

I giggle. "Say that again."

"Pizzazz?"

"Cute." I pinch his cheek, which makes Peter roll his eyes. "What kind of vibe were you thinking?"

"I don't know." Peter's brow furrows. "Some string lights might be cool, for starters. I like the ones you have. Maybe not in pink, though."

"We can look through Pinterest together," I promise. "And then we'll go—oh, Peter, did you see that?"

"Yeah," Peter says, and then we're both pushing ourselves up on our elbows, craning our necks. More silver flashes streak across the sky, like the briefest glimpse of fish scales. A parade of meteors, of falling stars.

On the blanket, Peter's hand covers mine. He squeezes.

"Make a wish."

*.*.*.*

We go back inside the tent at around 2 AM. Cheeks numb from the cold, I immediately kick off my shoes and pull on an extra pair of socks before wriggling into my sleeping bag. Peter is close behind, already yawning, and as I turn to watch him, I realize that this is the first full night we're spending together, all by ourselves. No curfews, no one waiting for us to come home. I don't even know if Peter snores, which is a strange thing to think about, a piece of information you wouldn't expect to be missing after dating someone for almost three years—after knowing them for even longer.

And what if he does snore? What if it's so loud it keeps me awake all night so that I'm cranky and can't stand to look at his pretty-boy face in the morning? And what might he learn about me, up close?

"Go to sleep, Lara Jean." Peter grumbles, his eyes shut. "I can feel you looking at me."

Scoffing, I retort, "You like being looked at." And then I roll closer, so that we're almost nose to nose, our knees bumping gently against each other, swaddled in our sleeping bags.

Maybe this is the difference between teenage love and adult love. Shedding the mystery and the allure of nighttime for the promise of morning, when we'll be at our barest. The bad breath and the messy hair and the little annoyances; the wanting to be close in spite of it all. Or maybe it's all the same in the end, night bleeding into day, and I don't need any more theories when I have the real deal right here, sleeping soft and slow. Waiting for me when I wake up.

I close my eyes.

[yasbxxgie]

How Hip-Hop Brings Green Issues to Communities of Color The environmental movement has largely failed to connect with people of color and marginalized urban communities. By confronting issues from contaminated water to climate change, Hip-Hop music has helped bridge that divide and bring home the realities of environmental injustice. 

When I was diversity director at North Carolina State University, part of my job was to recruit young people — often from communities of color — into the College of Natural Resources. It could be a struggle; these were talented and creative kids, but often they didn’t see how environmental or sustainability issues were relevant to their lives.

Then, a mentor who knew that I was a hip hop artist, made a suggestion: Why not try to reach them through your music? “Whatever comes naturally to you always captures peoples’ attention,” he said. On the next recruitment trip, I took his advice.

After introducing myself, I told the kids in the auditorium, “OK, when I pause, I want you all to say, ‘Come on.’” Then I began.

Here’s my minority report. About what’s going on with the poor. No clean water, got liquor stores…

Suddenly these kids were listening.

No banks, good housing can’t afford. Got drugs, got guns, got more. Dope boys, no books, gym floor. Deadpool, can’t swim, lead in my pores Contaminated mentally challenged, I’m sore…

Now I had their attention. As we went through the lyrics again, the students started to make the connections between access to natural resources and community health, between representation and environmental justice. This wasn’t just about going to college, I told them – this was about having a voice, about doing something about these injustices, such as unsafe drinking water and lead contamination. And they got it.

Hip hop [Hip-Hop] has been speaking to peoples’ struggles since it came out of South Bronx in the 1970s, whether it’s been about poverty, racism, or gun violence. Why shouldn’t it be about environmental justice, too?

Ever since, I’ve been using hip hop — or a philosophy that I call “hip hop forestry” or “hip hop sustainability” — to create a bridge for young people to environmental issues.

That bridge is sorely needed. Although people of color in the United States face elevated risk from environmental harms — including air pollution, hazardous waste, and flooding — their voices are often neglected in important discussions about environmental policy. In many cases, they simply aren’t at the table. A 2014 survey of environmental nonprofits, foundations, and government agencies, conducted by Dorceta Taylor of the University of Michigan, found that while people of color make up 36 percent of the U.S. population, they constitute no more than 16 percent of the workforce of any environmental organization. The result, Taylor argued, was the emergence of a disproportionately white “green insiders club.”

This isn’t because environmental professionals do not want to speak to people of color or that people of color don’t want a seat at that table. Too often, I believe, it’s that these different groups are simply speaking different languages. Those in the environmental fields are accustomed to speaking to small audiences that understand a specialized language that does not resonate with people of color.

Too often people in these communities dismiss environmental concerns because they have other pressing issues in their lives — in many cases, they’re in survival mode — and they believe “the environment” is disconnected from their experiences. We need to find forms of communication that resonate with those affected by climate change, pollution, food insecurity, contaminated water, and toxic exposures, and that speak to their values.

Rev. Lennox Yearwood Jr., president of the Hip Hop Caucus, which works to bridge the gap between communities of color and environmental advocacy, has seen this play out in the larger climate movement. His organization has a project called People’s Climate Music that issued a 2014 climate-inspired album. “Within the movement we have a tendency to make this much harder than it needs to be,” Yearwood said. “Climate change is definitely a scientific issue, but if we come at the discussion strictly from that direction it limits the ability to grow [the movement] and invite more people to be a part of it.”

“We want to break down the silos,” he said. “Sometimes people feel like they have to be invited to the movement or invited to the conversation. We’re trying to create new things that people can see themselves in.”

This is where hip hop sustainability can make a difference. Hip hop is a form of expression created by the marginalized communities of color I am trying to reach.

Popular hip hop artists have brought attention to the challenges facing impoverished communities in cities across America.

If you listen closely, you’ll hear in the music stories about the environment and how it affects communities. In his 1999 song “New World Water,” Brooklyn native Yasiin Bey (then known as Mos Def) breaks down the challenges some communities face in getting clean water, especially in the urban environment.

It’s the new world water, and every drop counts You can laugh and take it as a joke if you wanna But it don’t rain for four weeks some summers And it’s about to get real wild in the half You be buying Evian just to take a f___in’ bath Heads is acting wild, sippin’ poor, puffin’ dank Competin’ with the next man for higher playin’ rank See I ain’t got time try to be Big Hank, F___ a bank; I need a twenty-year water tank ‘Cause while these knuckleheads is out here sweatin’ they goods The sun is sitting in the treetops burnin’ the woods And as the flames from the blaze get higher and higher They say, ‘Don’t drink the water! We need it for the fire!’

In the 1995 Goodie Mob song “Soul Food,” Cee Lo Green writes:

Smoke steams from under the lid that’s on the pot Ain’t never had a lot but thankful for The little that I got why not be Fast food got me feeling sick Them crackers think they slick By trying to make this bullshit affordable I thank the Lord that my voice was recordable

Now I don’t think Cee Lo would say he’s speaking about an environmental issue. But he sure was speaking about food justice and food deserts.

For that matter, I wouldn’t call myself an environmental rapper. I’d say I am a rapper who happens to be environmentally conscious and who is aware that, like everyone else, my decisions can hurt the planet and what happens to the planet can hurt me. In one song I write about poor air quality and how the absence of trees and green spaces — and the abundance of concrete in public housing projects — affects human well-being. In another I touch on the role trees play in promoting clean air and clean water.

Forestry’s the practice, hip hop the religion Both made by humans, both imperfect make a new tradition This hip hop forestry, our trees are not a commodity They are our teachers showing how to live on troubled land and live in harmony This hip hop forestry because both rose from the underground One changed landscapes, the other changes the landscape of sound… Hip hop forestry, emissions we don’t do carbon copies We cross-pollinate culture and we respect our water of bodies

Clearly, many young people, like those teens in North Carolina, might not be putting much thought into these issues. Which is why hip hop [Hip-Hop] can serve as such a valuable entry point. I want kids to think about the environment, to write about the environment, to rap about the environment. Not just because it will strengthen their artistry — and may even create some new poets — but because it will increase their awareness of environmental injustice. And if we do that, there’s every reason to believe some will dig in deeper, want to learn more about the facts and the science, and discover how interconnected all these issues are. Some may even decide to go into an environmental field where they’re so badly needed.

I always tell young people: If no one hears you, then how will your concerns be heard? You know what’s happening in your communities, and you should be able to articulate this. But first you have to get into the room and make your voice heard. Otherwise no one will know.

If they do get into that room, they’ll probably find that few people at the table look like them. But if we have any chance at resolving the environmental threats facing so many of our communities, they’re going to have to be at that table.

[v]

Photograph:

Rev. Lennox Yearwood Jr., president of the Hip Hop Caucus, at a climate rally in Washington, D.C.

[fredenglish]

Michael Sheehan

What’s up, #FeatureFriday fans? Today, we talked to Michael Sheehan -- SUNY Fredonia’s newest professor -- about his career, his views on genre, and his hopes for the future of Fredonia!

1. Talk a little bit about your career leading up to SUNY Fredonia.

Well, my career began as a SUNY undergraduate, studying creative writing at Geneseo. As a freshman, I knew I wanted to be a writer but hadn't really been exposed to writing, had never taken (or heard of) a workshop course. I didn't really know creative writing was an option until college. Then after Geneseo, I got a Master's degree in the St. John's College Great Books Program in Santa Fe, New Mexico, both because I felt there were big gaps in my reading and knowledge, which I felt I would need to fill in to be a writer, and also because I wanted to live in the southwest. I stayed in the southwest for six years, in Santa Fe and then in Tucson, Arizona, for my MFA. After all that time in the heat, I moved to Madison, Wisconsin, for a fellowship and then to DC before heading back to the heat (and humidity) for a chance to teach creative writing in the BFA program at Stephen F. Austin. So, I've spent a lot of time in creative writing classrooms, but also a good bit of time working outside creative writing as a tutor, a technical writer, and as an editor. But ever since the first creative writing class I took as an undergraduate, I've known this is what I want to do and where I want to be. 

 2. What originally drew you to SUNY Fredonia as an institution?

I grew up in Western New York, so, for one thing, it feels like a sort of homecoming. Not one I'd expected when I left years ago for the desert, but one I'm very excited about. But beyond that, a lot about SUNY Fredonia as an institution feels familiar to me in the best sense: the place, the size, the students. My background is fiction but I have more recently been writing creative nonfiction and have taught poetry and multigenre classes, so I'm drawn to the program for its opportunities to teach across genres. I also have a lot of experience working with literary magazines like The Trident and with reading series and am really looking forward to contributing to both at Fredonia. I'm also excited about the opportunity to help the creative writing program grow and to consider its future.

 3. What are you hoping to achieve as an educator at SUNY Fredonia?

Lots of things, many of which I think I will discover as I go. But mainly I'm hoping to help expand the creative writing program and help make it a destination within the region and the larger SUNY system. Fredonia has such a great foundation already that I think there is a lot of potential to provide more for students interested in creative writing and draw in new students. I also want to find ways to connect creative writing to technology and professional skills but without losing the sense of it as an art. I think too often people see a disconnect between creative disciplines and career qualifications, and sometimes I think we view the art of writing as divorced from twenty-first-century media. But I think there is a lot of possibility to push the boundaries of the art by exploring how it fits into our contemporary modes of communication.  

 4. Do you have any advice for students who may be just entering into university?

It's hard to say what advice will serve all students entering the university, but I guess I'd just say: take your time. When you first get to college, there is a lot to learn about how the university works even before you really focus in your own discipline. You have to also give yourself time to discover what you're really interested in pursuing. To that end, it can be good to take classes early on that might expose you to something you'll want to study more. College should not be a direct career-training program, but should instead be an open intellectual endeavor. This includes self-discovery and opportunities to see the connections across disciplines rather than simply choosing one path and sticking with it. But, that said, it's also okay to enter with a plan and pursue it. Mostly I think just don't mistake the ends for the means: enjoy the experience of learning while it's happening and let it happen.

 5. What do you find most helpful, in your own experience, for effective creative writing?

Practice. I think the most important thing is just doing the work, making writing a part of your daily life. The more you read and write, the better you will become as a writer. Along with developing a writing routine, though, I think it's really important to let it be fun. As a writer, if you're writing what you'd want to read, it will be a better experience and probably better writing. There's a balance you have to strive for between doing the thing you love (which should be fun) and also really committing to the work it takes to achieve what you're aiming for (which can be hard and take time). The fun should hopefully include discovery, being open to the unknown. The essayist Naomi Kimbell says, "Write bravely," and I Iove that. Write a lot, take risks, allow the possibility of failure, welcome the possibility of unexpected success. 

 6. Do you have any specific genres that interest you as a writer? As an educator?

I've become much more interested in writing creative nonfiction, especially the lyric essay, in the past few years. This actually came out of a class I taught. I had been interested in teaching nonfiction and when I had the chance, one of the assignments was an experiential essay, for which students had to do research like attending an event, interviewing subjects, and reading relevant sources. I did this assignment, too, by going to the trial of a local environmental activist, and I basically fell in love with what the essay form could do. I started reading a lot more nonfiction and have taught more classes and written more essays. I've also been interested in writing and reading fiction that incorporates elements of science fiction. As an educator, I'm also really interested in fusions of creative writing and new media, including interactive essays and graphic memoirs, as well as the use of narrative craft for audio and video stories. So much of the information we take in on a daily basis connects text and image or connects one story or perspective to a wider vantage point. Some of the earliest storytellers wove narratives together into a larger whole, like Boccaccio, Chaucer, and Cervantes, or the 1,001 Nights and The Ocean of the Stream of Stories. I think Somadeva's title could serve as a metaphor for the internet as a great body made up of many intermixing streams of information. 

 7. You have an interest in newer, emergent mediums. What benefits do you think that non-prose mediums can give an audience?

First I should say that I love text--and print in particular--as a medium. No objections from me. But I also feel there are areas of exploration that relate to digital media, and ways we can enrich our stories and our stories can enrich our increasingly mediated lives. So, I think part of the interest is finding new ways for creative writing to tell us about us, to make sense of our Instagram-selfie selves, our social media friendships, our globally-connected community. And another part of it is opening up the elements of craft to more media than just the printed word. I don't want printed prose to go away; but digital media allow different types of interaction, different means of navigating narratives, new possibilities. 

 8. Finally: what do you believe is the most important lesson that writing can teach us?

There are a lot of things I think creative writing teaches, so it's hard to pick the most important. I think good writing teaches empathy and helps us understand even those who are not like us, who make choices that are totally opposite the choices we'd make. I think in that way, good writing can teach us that there are others who feel like us, that we are not alone. But I also think creative writing can maybe teach a different lesson. There are so many stories, poems, essays, books written across centuries of human civilization. But they haven't exhausted human experience; when we read something written in 2019, it can still feel new. This isn't because the subject has never been written about before, but instead, the way the subject is written can be newly revealing. And a poem or story or essay can resonate with my experience and show me something, even if it's a poem written six hundred years ago or one I've read many times before. I think there is something really powerful in recognizing universal themes as they exist in particular human moments. It helps us appreciate our shared context while also seeing how each individual is importantly distinct. 

[meggannn]

concrit, and notes for the self

So this is a bit of a weird post I've been wondering how to articulate for a while. I know people have different ideas on fandom courtesy in this regard, and opinions on this topic can be heavily divided.

This is my post to get it out there and say I don't mind, and in fact encrouage, people giving me concrit in my fic in AO3 comments or reblogs. Everyone is different and everyone writes fic for different reasons; some people write for fun and don't care about improving. I totally respect that and that's why I don't offer concrit unless someone specifically asks for it. I'm writing for fun, but I also take my writing seriously, maybe more seriously than I should, so if you've ever read my fic and thought "hm, that bit's not great," please consider this an open invitation to give me all the constructive feedback you want. I try to say I welcome it consistently in my notes when I post fic, but I guess people don't really register that. In fairness, I've seen people say they welcome opinions on their fic and then turn haughty and defensive when someone gives any feedback that isn't praise, but I've always respected writers who freely share the negative concrit they receive (so long as it’s not a troll) because as a reader, it also encourages me to read and interact more with them. If you don't feel comfortable sharing it publicly or want to talk about a certain thing at length, you can always feel free to IM me privately here, or leave the comment on anon on AO3.

This is a weird thing to post on Tumblr, since I don't think I have a big writer presence here, but AO3 doesn't really have a good platform to share this kind of message. And I realize this is a bizarre thing to want to post about -- if I'm not receiving any concrit, like, shouldn't that be a good thing? am I really complaining I'm not receiving any? -- but the few times I have received concrit in the last five years, one was from a friend who knows me well enough to know I welcome it, and the other two were strangers who seemed hesitant to bring it up at all, that made me wonder if they were scared of my reaction so they sandwiched it between complements to soften the blow. I don’t want people to worry about my reaction and apologize for giving negative feedback. I’m always down to talk about ways I can get better. Chances are more likely I’ll probably apologize to you, lol.

Not to say people should look for things to criticize if they think there aren't any -- I'd be flattered -- but I don’t want people thinking giving me concrit will make me resent them, or that bad feelings will fester if we’re mutuals. I promise there isn't anything mean enough you can say about my work I haven't already said to myself. (Though I will say, I'm writing this with the implication people will be reviewing recent or future works judging my talent as a writer now, not dig into my '09-'13 fic history back when I didn't know the word for ellipses and criticize me how I was.)

I have a weird history with concrit (it all started with a flame war back in ‘10...), but now I take the smallest comments from both positive and negative feedback so seriously to the point it does affect how I look at my future works, possibly because most of the feedback fic writers -- including myself -- do receive is just a single bookmark or anonymous kudos with no words attached. Sometimes when I think of people hating my stuff it makes me never want to share anything again, but a large majority of the time when I do receive it, I find that I have a thicker skin than I thought and I'm very easily able to separate the work from my personal feelings. Again: there's nothing anybody can say will be as bad as what I've already told myself, lol.

I'm putting the rest of this behind a cut because it's somewhat related, but it's mostly me blabbing about ways I think I can improve. I've been trying to narrow it down to a few specific areas I want to get better in. Some are going to be on me and only on me to make happen, but I feel like others might better spotted by readers.

This is about to get very mopey and self-indulgent, so if anyone actually reads this bear with me.

Vocabulary. It’s not that I think I have a limited vocabulary, but I think my tendency is to rely on the same words or phrases, which... just feels lazy and fake after a while. @thunderheadfred suggested I don’t try to hard with this one, because trying too hard to include big words can often lend to a convoluted mess, but I think the solution to my problem might just be “read more” and “get creative with how words interact with each other.” Part of this is also just learning relevant jargon or legalese or whatnot and getting familiar with it to the point that I finally don’t feel like I’m playing Mad Libs when I’m talking about something I don’t understand.

General... logic editing. I'm not sure how to describe this one, but I've had moments occasionally while rereading fic where I just think, “Life doesn’t work like that,” or “Megan, you pulled that one completely out of your ass.” You ever just read a fic and think “Goddammit, this makes no sense,” or even with smaller things, just “that’s not how that works”? Some of them are going to be things only specialists will know, which is okay because at that point I feel like learning to get it right is more a bonus than an obligation especially if it’s not plot relevant, but I generally want to make everything as accurate and realistic as possible to the point that the story unfolding in the reader’s head matches the film I’m imagining in mine. Most of the time, I can bullshit my way through stuff I don’t know, but bullshitting also takes talent, which... well. The thing about talent is that you need to have it or develop it, it’s not always something someone can help you with. But still, it’s a bit of a weird problem to articulate when the crux of it comes down to me saing like an idiot, “Uh, I don’t know how things work.” I kinda vaguely know how governments work. My knowledge of science and technology and math is in the negatives. And I don’t have a goddamn clue how the military works, which is a great joke on me for falling in love with a character like Shepard and wanting to write a million fics about them. So, just, part of this is research, but oftentimes research is only half the problem. The other half of the problem is sitting down at my keyboard and thinking “Great, now how am I going to write it?” because more often than not what happens is that the information I just read off Wikipedia or an obscure informative website just collects dust in my brain. I’m trying to be patient with myself about this kind of thing, because on some level I realize I’m pretty damn young and sometimes you just learn things by! going through life! But I am also an impatient ravenclaw motherfucker who wants to be a good writer Right Now. I want to know how things work and how they affect the people around them! I want to be able to make my story and understanding of the world as accurate as possible! I want people to go “yes, this makes absolute sense” not just “oh, that sounds kinda right I guess?” One thing I try to remind myself is, when I think a small thing sounds wrong or try-hard or that that thing doesn’t quite sound right for whatever reason, most of the time, the reader has no idea. The reader might be skimming over it, they may be digesting it without any sense that something is wrong about it whatsoever, hell they might even like it. I mean, if you asked me to read a friend’s fic and point out an error, I’d have to pull out a magnifying glass to find one, and they’d probably be able to recite a laundry list’s worth within five seconds. So there’s that.

Environmental building. I feel like I'm improving on this simply because I've finally started acknowledging where characters are even located in a place at all, lmfao. I'd like to upgrade to "being so good at describing locations and environments that someone other than me can ‘see’ where they are," but atm I'm settling for, "remember to at least TRY to transcribe the physical locale I see in my mind, because half of the time you forget to do even that, dumbass."

Characterization. This is a big one because it affects so much else, namely, the course of the entire fic. I say this all the time to reviewers but I mean it. A fair amount of time I can type on autopilot and it’s like the characters are doing all the work for me, but other times I sit for an hour scratching my head saying “Jesus, what would Varric say in this situation?” and then I realize “Maybe Varric wouldn’t even let himself get into this situation in the first place,” and that starts a whole chain of doubt and thinking about rewriting and actual rewriting while wondering if the rewriting is even necessary. I've recently been able to put my most consistent problem to words, and that's that I will always have staple issues with the POV characters. The nature of my style means that I spend a lot of time in the POV's head, which sometimes means less energy is spent developing their actual actions. E.g., say I write a fic with Shepard as the POV. If Garrus is in the fic, he is absolutely going to be the snarky, confident, more proactive version of himself to make up for all of the angst and moaning I will inevitably write as a result of digging into Shepard's mind. But say I write the same fic with Garrus as the POV. Depending on the time setting, I will be so caught up in his head as he worries about his mom dying and his guilt over losing his team and his place in the Hierarchy or if his dad will ever forgive him or his insecurities over his relationship with Shepard, that Shepard-the-deuteragonist will have to be the talkative, confident marine to draw him out of his own head. And again, imagine this is, like, the same story -- the same story written from a different perspective shouldn’t go a different way! In this example, some of the gap can be excused with the fact that by necessity, the POV has them viewing each other. Garrus and Shepard know each other well enough to know each other's bravado and strength can be a facade for their seriously fucked up emotional issues, so it's not that they imagine the other never has these moments of darker reflection that they do. And the same thing about Varric and Hawke or Hawke and Fenris, etc etc. Depending on how you play them, they could also be looking at each other through rose-colored glasses, or be so used to accepting and supporting the other through their private uncertainties that for the sake of the fic, that what they mostly register in the other is just the best or most confident side of the other's behavior. Narratively, I've realized it might come out of a subliminal urge to balance one's introspective side with the other's more proactive side, which may work sometimes (if they're both serving aggressive roles in the story, for me, the fic might get too 'loud'; if they're both too quiet, it'll just get boring), but most times I feel like it doesn't do justice to the "loud" parts of the POV character, since they are always the one who gets caught in paragraphs on paragraphs of angsty introspection in their own head due to my inability to write anything else. Shepard and Garrus are undeniably “loud” characters no matter how you slice it. Shepard may mope and pine and nearly drown in her depression in her private moments, but she's also a marine, and she’s proactive and brave and assertive. So I'm trying to be hyperaware of when I lose those facets of her personality through the trees when I try to capture the forest that is her darker side. And I would be wholly welcome to anybody who has comments on that type of thing in the future, if I write a character that isn't acting like themself.

This got a lot longer than I thought it would so now I’m not sure how to end it. I think I’m just going to sit in silence for a moment then heat up some soup. Hmm.

ETA: I would be ashamed if I didn’t mention @tetrahedrals, who consistently provides me wonderfully helpful feedback on my ME fic, and none of whose fault this is. All remaining errors in my fic after they’ve been beta’d and workshopped are entirely mine, but she’s helped me a lot to ensure there are far fewer than there might have been. xo

[rhys-ravenfeather]

So...about that post I made earlier...

Warning: Long post ahead, only read if you really care.

So, earlier this morning after starting on some new spreadsheets for my aunt (side note--Bob’s Burgers is apparently a real place, if the info I’ve been looking up is any indication), and afterwards I went to Indeed.com to try looking for online work to apply to. I managed to apply to ONE job. Which I got a response to by email later, but decided not to go through with. 

It’s just...so repetitive, going to that website day after day, typing up stuff for ‘data entry’, or online editing and writing, and just seeing more of the same. I’m not even in the U.S. right now, so there’s not even really a lot I can do right now. I’m sick of this country--I know that things in America aren’t great right now, but at least there I’d have more job opportunities. So I’m kind of between a rock and a hard place here.

And later, in the afternoon, I went to look up this one school I found last week, where I can pursue a Masters’ in art. It looks really amazing--like, one of the really great courses it offers is in Sequential Art, which I think would be really handy if I’m going to make Myth City and Phylum/Strange World (still playing around with the name) fully printed graphic novels one day. But well...it’s far from the first college I’ve looked at. Once upon a time, I thought Chatham was right up my alley too, but they turned me down flat. Plus, I already desperately emailed my mom and stepdad about that one, about online courses, etc...so it honestly feels like I’m just wasting my time. 

I still think I can do the Environmental Journalist thing, if not as a full career then a hobby, or something on the side, but I was always more the creative type. I know for a fact that I want to create--to write and draw and share my ideas...but I didn’t even start drawing seriously until I was in my junior year of high school. I’ve just gotten such a passion for it now...and now I’m mad at myself because it took me this long to realize what I want to do. I mean, I technically knew before...I had things that I wanted to do then, but now that I know for certain, it just feels like I wasted my time pursuing Environmental Studies. I’m no good with science...I just want to kick myself. 

Yes, a part of me still wants to be able to go out into amazing wild places and find wild animals like Steve Irwin or Coyote Peterson (for those who don’t know who he is, look up ‘Brave Wilderness’ on YouTube). But looking at that, I don’t know if I’m cut out for that. Writing and drawing is more me...but I still have a lot to learn on that end too; heck, I’ve been using gimp for what...eight years now? Nine? 

And I just...I’m just really mad at myself because I’m almost 27 years old and still can’t figure out what I want to do with the rest of my life. I don’t even have a job flipping burgers or whatever like most other people in my position; I just spend all my time in front of my computer sitting in the living room of my childhood home in a stupid backwoods third-world country where I’ll probably be until the day I die. 

I’ll...I’ll see you all tomorrow. 

[gossamerglassjellyfish]

College

I attended my first college class of spring semester 2017 today.  I'm a senior, hopefully graduating with a four-year degree in May.  Since I'm almost done, I thought I'd do a post on my college experiences.

Not including the year I took off for health reasons, this is my fifth year of college.  I started out thinking I was going to get a degree in the social sciences.  I tried psychology, then cultural anthropology.  I found out I didn't really want to do either of them, so I switched to something I've always really loved.  English with a Creative Writing emphasis.  I knew I needed to do something with that - I couldn't just get a high paying job with a simple English degree - so I took out a second area of study: Marketing.  Marketing has a lot to do with both psychology and creativity, so I knew it would be perfect for me.

There, I found my true calling.  My undergraduate degree will be in Creative Writing and Marketing.  I love both subjects - English is all about reading and critical thinking, Creative Writing has been brutal but inspiring and helpful toward my writing skills, and Marketing involves lots of yucky technical terminology but also a great deal of psychology and creativity - plenty of room to maneuver.  It's also not terribly mathematical, which is nice because math is my one bad subject.  (An eight year old could probably do math better than me, and I'm only sort of kidding.)

From there, I hope to go into advertising, promotion, social media, and business writing.  My internship was a business writing job for an environmental organization.  I also hope to professionally publish my own original short stories and poems - the stuff I've never posted online - starting in magazines and periodicals, and since I'm taking music classes, I also hope to eventually go with my guitar to some open mic nights in a big city and see where that leads me.

So I have lots of different plans.  I'm going to try staying with my family, who do live near a big city, mostly for health related reasons.  (I need to have someone on hand in case I have a health emergency, and I also need someone around as an emotional support system.)

I did not get into the college I originally planned on, and guess what?  I survived.  I ended up going to a different college, then switching from there to yet another college.  I actually think the diversity and failure helped me become a more well rounded person.  I also got my first really bad mark in college, and I survived that.  College taught me how to fail - reminded me that a single failure is not the end of the world, and there can be benefits to going down an unexpected path.

My first official school interview was for college, and my first official job interview was during college.  (I did have a job in high school, but it was a volunteer job and they hired me based on my ability and willingness to do the work involved - there was no formal interview.)  The job interview was for my internship.  Looking for and being interviewed for a job - or even applying for a college - for the first time is extraordinarily nerve wracking, and the waiting period is hell, but it was a good learning experience.  I'm not as terrified of finding a job after college as I used to be, and switching schools was less terrifying than asking to first be admitted to one.  I'm also more confident in my ability to talk to a boss and fellow employees, and to master the details of a new assignment, class, or job.  Even if I end up getting a lower level job or having to go back to school, I know that somehow, I'll manage.  I'm more secure in myself than I used to be.

College taught me a great deal of independence.  I first went to school out of state, and then switched to a whole different state.  I lived in the dorms with a roommate, then in an apartment with a roommate.  College was when I began dating.  College was when I first experienced a major health emergency.  College was when I had my first drink, my first kiss, my first breakup - my first a lot of things.  It's when I first drank coffee, first became interested in politics and the news.  I learned how to maneuver a town or city on my own in college, how to independently take a transit system, and how to shop for and purchase stuff on my own.  I learned more about what I wanted and didn't want in life.  I became better at standing up for and believing in myself.  I had lots of bumps and bruises, twists and turns along the way.  But I came out on the other end happier and stronger for it.

In fact, I would recommend something totally unpopular.  Go to college really far away from home.  Don't live with a significant other.  Don't even have a significant other.  For at least a few months.  Because you have to know.  You have to know that you can survive alone, or else you'll spend the rest of your life being absolutely terrified of being alone.

I think college taught me a lot in the classroom, too.  Among the life and job skills I learned: preparing adequately for an assignment on a deadline, putting together and giving a presentation, coming up with a project idea, reading a book quickly by skimming over words, writing coherently, speaking in public or at a meeting, working with groups, mastering a new subject or skill quickly, and critically examining the words, work, or expectations of someone else in order to better assist them.  I think a lot of the skills I learned would be useful even in a lower level job.

Also I learned how to bullshit people into thinking you know what you're doing.  Like it or not, that's another important life skill.

So if you're thinking about going to college, but aren't sure if you should - or if you want to go to college, but the idea terrifies you - just know it's not as bad as you think.  You'll learn a lot, and despite the difficulties, I highly recommend it as an experience.

A few tips:

Attend class.  Always.

Raise your hand to participate as often as possible.

Don't try to do all the reading right before the test.

If you try to absorb every single word and detail of an assigned reading, you won't survive upper division courses.  Learn to skim.

Plan out an essay before you start writing it.

Sleep, food, and doctor's visits are important.  College will become meaningless if you keel over and die halfway through it.

Failure is healthy and important.  You have to learn how to deal with failure before going out into the working world as an adult.

One class, assignment, or grade is not the end of the world.  Don't get into the habit of thinking that it is.

You're usually better prepared than you think you are.

Most college professors are not as terrifying as you might expect.

If you think a professor is acting inappropriately, contact the Dean of Students.  I did once.  You can ask to remain completely anonymous.

Roommate situations can suck.  Not every roommate is going to end up your undying best friend.  However - this coming from someone who was emotionally abused by a couple of her dormitory roommates - if you think a situation is unhealthy for you, get out of it.  Immediately.  Don't let anyone talk you out of leaving.

Sometimes roommates take the emotional baggage from a previous bad roommate experience into their next room.  Don't be that person, but look out for that person.

Try to be easygoing with your fellow roommates.  Don't hate on them too much, but genuinely listen to someone if they have a problem.  Most college roommates don't have much experience sharing a space with someone their age, so be respectful of that.  Don't walk around naked, keep relatively clean, and don't touch their stuff without asking.  Three easy rules, right there.  Be especially respectful in someone else's room.

Don't judge your roommate's lifestyle choices.  Unless they're interfering with your lifestyle - and I can't emphasize this enough - it's none of your goddamn business.  There's a difference between being vocal if you have a problem, and being rude or judgmental.  An important difference.

On that note, sometimes they're going to be in the room at the same time as you or stay up later than you.  Maybe most of the time, in some cases.  As long as they're quiet when you're studying, they keep to their space, and they agree to the lights being off when you go to bed, you don't really have any room to complain.  That's what sharing a room can be like.

Despite all mythology, taking a year off from school does not mean you'll never go back to school.  I took a year off, and look at me.  After this semester, I'll be finished with all my undergraduate coursework.

That's all the thoughts I can think of related to college.  I'll be glad if this helped someone in any way.  I think college is an incredibly difficult but worthwhile experience.  It can really help you get to know yourself.

[t-baba]

The Autistic UXer: Understanding, Researching and Designing for Autistic People

I’ve always known there was something different about me. Everyone is different in their own way, but I’ve always known there was more to it for me. Turns out I was right. At the age of 29, I was diagnosed with Asperger’s Syndrome. That means I’m autistic. I was born with a differently wired brain, which makes me neurodiverse.

There are lots of people out there with different brains. They cover a broad range of differences including: autism, ADHD, dyslexia, traumatic brain injury and many more. Different brains are beautiful because they think differently on a whole other level. I think we need that.

At UX Australia 2017 this year, I spoke about my experiences as an autistic UXer and I’d like to expand on some of what I shared at the conference.

Defining autism and how I see it

At a high level (and keeping in mind that I am not a medical professional), autism is characterised by a series of traits. Autistic traits fit into something called The Triad of Impairments. It’s a model that shows the three key areas that all autistic people have differences in: social communication, social interaction and social imagination.

  While I appreciate the value it holds for diagnostic practices, to me the Triad of Impairments doesn’t do much else. It doesn’t communicate the experience of being autistic – what it actually means and how it feels. I also don’t consider myself to be impaired.

Autism has a severity scale attached to it that I also don’t find helpful. The scale has 3 levels:

Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD) Level 1 (the condition formerly known as Asperger’s Syndrome)

ASD Level 2

ASD Level 3

I find this problematic because severity of symptoms doesn’t necessarily represent experience and can lead to misconceptions. Don’t think that because I come in at ASD Level 1 my existence is ‘mild’ or I’m ‘not that autistic’.

Autism is autism. There is nothing mild about it. Autistic people diagnosed at ASD Levels 2 and 3 also aren’t necessarily ‘more impaired’ or ‘worse off’. They might be perfectly happy communicating and interacting with the world differently and that should never be viewed as a problem.

I also find the severity scale somewhat misleading because it creates potential for people without medical knowledge to believe that the autism spectrum is linear which it absolutely is not. Add that to the fact that neither model clearly explains that no two autistic people are exactly the same and you’re left with a bit of confusing mess that doesn’t communicate how it actually feels to be Autistic and the type of support that’s needed.

To fill in this gap (again, please remember I’m not a medical professional), I created my own model to help me explain what I feel it means to be autistic.

I’ve always viewed the spectrum overall as a highly detailed colour wheel with segments of shades, tints and hues.

Take this colour wheel and imagine splitting it into three sections like this and overlaying the Triad of Impairments model.

Colour wheel with triad of impairments model overlaid.

Drilling down to the next layer, within each of the 3 areas, you can see 4 ‘slices’ – like a pizza. Now I’d like you to imagine that each slice of colour wheel pizza is a high-level autistic trait.

As an example, I’ve chosen the Difficulty understanding ‘unwritten social rules’ trait that lives under Social Interaction. You’ll notice within the pizza slice is a series of segments which make up the hue, shades and tints of the colour yellow.

The segments represent the different ways in which the high-level trait might present in an autistic individual. For example: standing too close to other people, inappropriate conversation topics, eating before everyone else has received their food (it’s illogical to let my food go cold on account of you) and many, many more. In my diagram, each segment holds equal weighting and is about differences, not severity.

An autistic individual’s unique configuration of that presentation can be shown like this:

When you put it all together for all the pizza slices, you get this:

Every autistic person has their own unique version of this. Not all autistic people have all the traits but we all come from the same colour wheel pizza. The same trait might also appear in two people but one might experience it more or less intensely than the other. Some autistic people might also have more or less slices in their colour wheel pizza. This is a very high-level way of viewing and communicating the spectrum that I’ve found useful for building awareness and understanding.

Busting myths about autism

There are a number of silly myths about autism that make me want to tear my hair out.

No, I’m not a genius. My IQ is 143 and I did reach my adult reading age when I was 6. But given that UX is full of super smart people, I’m probably quite average. I’m absolutely terrible at maths and I only enjoy the practical experiment fun side of science – I find the reporting and clean up unbearably boring. I’m not a robot. Every single one of my specialised interests is in a creative field. I’m good at music, art, design and writing. I really do have a husband and please, please, please stop asking me about Rain Man.

The biggest and by far most annoying myth of all, is the myth that autistic people lack empathy. That frustrates me because it is the absolute opposite of the truth.

As an autistic person, I experience the world at a heightened level of intensity. I’m hypersensitive to everything in my world: light, sound, colour, textures, shapes, movement, my emotions and the emotions of those around me. Everything hits me in one go like a blastwave and it can take a moment to process and adjust. When I get overwhelmed and the world just gets too much, I experience something called sensory overload. Then I either spin out of control and experience a meltdown or I shut down and completely withdraw.

Autistic people don’t lack empathy. What we lack is the neurological capacity to communicate and cope with empathy overload.

I’ll give you an example. When I hear someone crying, regardless of whether or not I know them, I instantly feel a stab of intense emotional pain. I simultaneously feel panicky, sad and on the verge of tears myself. I’m frozen to the spot because I’m feeling those emotions alongside that other person and I can’t process it all or figure out what to do about it. In that moment, I can’t communicate what’s going on inside me and it can look a lot like I can’t relate or share the feelings of others. In reality, I’ve already related and shared and my brain is shorting out due to excessive emotion flow.

Designing and researching for autistic people

There are a number of assistive technologies and design examples out there for autistic people. The problem is, many of them are for children and most are aimed at changing our communication differences. Designing to change autistic traits rather than to maximise strengths is not helpful. There’s nothing wrong with being autistic. We communicate differently; deal with it.

Focusing design efforts on ‘fixing’ autistic communication differences so that we fit in with everyone else goes against the diverse and inclusive society we all have a right to enjoy. Autistic people are not broken and we don’t need fixing.

This kind of thinking also misses the mark on a vast expanse of design opportunities that would be helpful. What we really need is support and empowerment to just be ourselves. Because everyone deserves to feel safe to be themselves.

Some examples of how UX can empower autistic people include:

Design that supports our sensory differences or minimises sensory overload

End to end assistance for complex experiences such as navigating an international airport from booking to boarding and beyond

Tools to help manage Executive Function related differences in areas such as: planning, time management, problem solving and organisation.

Awesome autism design examples

I’d like to share three amazing examples with you. I searched high and low and there isn’t a lot out there, but these ones are absolutely amazing.

New Struan School (Scotland)

The first one is the design of the New Struan School in Scotland. Schools in Scotland are required to provide a safe and stimulating education environment with a strong focus on inclusive design principles.

The design of the New Struan School took those principles beyond government recommendations to create a specialised environment for autistic people aged 5 to 19. The design of the school was driven entirely by the needs of autistic people. Some of my favourite design elements include:

A wide, central walkway lit by natural light from a glass atrium ceiling

Quiet spaces for mental recharging and for taking much-needed breaks from socialising

No fluorescent lights and adjustable daylight simulators for rainy days

Large carpeted spaces to absorb sound

Glass panels on classroom doors

Curved walls to guide movement from one space to the next (I suspect that might help with acoustics too!)

Inside the halls of the New Struan School. Source

The New Struan School is for autistic students only – imagine what could happen if this kind of thinking were applied to all types of schools! There are many neurological differences that would benefit from small environmental tweaks that just blend into a seamless design for everyone. Don’t stop at one – I’d like to see this type of thinking applied to mainstream schools and universities too.

Stimtastic (US-based shipping to most countries)

For autistics and by autistics, Stimtastic is an organisation that creates and sells toys and jewellery that supports ‘stimming’. Stimming refers to our need to self-stimulate which kind of looks like fidgeting but is much more than that. When we’re feeling overwhelmed or stressed, stimming helps calm us down. Stimtastic sells a wide range of products and all of their original products are researched and designed with and for autistic people.

Stimtastic jewellery. Source

More than just a shop, 5 core principles lie at the heart of Stimtastic:

Affordability- most products on the website are under $10 USD each with the most expensive item being a $25 USD bike chain bracelet

Representation- handmade jewellery and handmade toys are crafted by neurodiverse people

Inclusion – products are not categorised by age or gender and simply provide a detailed description allowing customers to decide what’s best for them

Giving back – 10% of proceeds from sales goes back into the autistic community

Celebration – shopping with Stimtastic is fun and in my experience, very human.

I love their fidget jewellery. it’s so subtle and I can wear the thing that’s going to help calm me down without feeling like I need a bigger bag.

Nana’s Weighted Blankets (Australia-based)

Nana’s Weighted Blankets is probably one of the best examples I’ve seen for providing sensory comfort to autistic people. This company was started in 2009 when ‘Nana’ (also known as Sharon) learned that her then 5-year-old grandson, Toby, had been diagnosed with autism. Toby was having a very hard time getting to sleep and he was exhausted. Sharon thought a weighted blanket might help but she couldn’t find anyone here in Australia that made them in a way that was safe, affordable and machine washable – some of the options out there were filled with popcorn. So, she made one herself. And it worked!

Nana’s Weighted Blankets. Source

What I love about these blankets is the level of customisation available. The weight, the size, the fabric, the pattern can all be selected and if you want to go heavier than the listed options, all you have to do is send an email.

Tips for designing and researching for autistic people

Here are some key things to keep in mind when you’re designing and researching for autistic people.

When researching for autistic people

Allow extra time for questions when planning the session

Conduct the research in a quiet room with natural lighting and recognise that autistic people are quite sensitive to their environment simply by asking “Is there anything I can to make you feel more comfortable?”.

Treat us like any other participant- we’re just people

If an autistic person brings a parent or carer with them, speak directly to the autistic person. Our parents and carers do NOT speak for us

Don’t be put off by our unusual eye contact. Holding eye contact can be quite painful for some autistic people and should never be taken as a sign of disengagement

Consider not having observers present in the same room. It can be a bit overwhelming- especially when those observers don’t stay silent like they’re supposed to!

Provide clear, bullet-pointed instructions upfront both written and verbally

Understand that our facial expressions don’t always match how we feel on the inside – if in doubt just ask!

These tips are of course most useful when you actually know that the person is autistic. You may come across an autistic research participant without realising, so it’s something to keep in the back of your mind. Don’t ask the person outright. They not may be or they may be undiagnosed. Instead, just focus on finding out what you can do to make the person feel comfortable.

When designing for autistic people

Upfront discovery research is essential and assumptions about our needs and perceived limitations must be avoided.

Be certain that you are adding value. The market is already flooded with frankly useless apps and online tools for autistic people – do your research and you’ll avoid designing something that simply isn’t needed let alone wanted.

Don’t design to change autistic traits or try to ‘teach’ us to do something – that is ableist and dehumanising.

Design for autistic people, not their parents or carers. There are plenty of tools, experiences and support systems designed for parents and carers but there is a significant shortage of useful design for autistic people – especially for autistic adults.

View autism and other neurological differences the same way you would any other disability – with respect.

Practice inclusive language: avoid terms like ‘suffers from autism’ ‘trapped by autism’ and the creepiest one I’ve heard so far, ‘touched by autism’ (I can assure you that autism does not go around touching people).

Do your research before aligning to Autism related organisations – some promote abusive therapies and do nothing more than throw blue puzzle piece themed pity parties for the poor suckers who raised us. Look for organisations that are run for and by autistic people.

Do design with us to help change perceptions and de-stigmatise autism – co-design, co-design and co-design again!

I’ll leave you with this amazing animated video created by Alex Amelines that explains a bit about what it feels like to be autistic in a really beautiful way.

The post The Autistic UXer: Understanding, Researching and Designing for Autistic People appeared first on UX Mastery.

by Ashlea McKay via UX Mastery http://ift.tt/2iipxEK

[theresgloryforyou]

my review of the mother! review, which I wrote last night in an attempt to break through some writer’s block I’ve been experiencing on top of everything else.  this is what I do when I am bored apparently:  apply feminist praxis to mass produced “entertainment” I refuse to otherwise engage with, because, as a family member recently told me, I’m no fun.  I’m no fun because I can’t enjoy trashy shit like this for “what it is”.  I said no,  I’m not fun because I can’t enjoy trashy shit because I know exactly what it is.

anyway, my stupid review of the stupider review.  david sims’ review in italics where applicable.  if you care to see this movie and don’t want spoilers, do not read this, or david sims’ review in The Atlantic.  you have been warned.

1.  tried not to get too hard assed on the pretentiousness of the title, but every time I see it I immediately think JEB!

2.  The plot of mother! is very simple—at least until it starts getting more unhinged. It begins on a shot of a woman’s crying face in the middle of a vast inferno, after which a man (Javier Bardem) inserts a crystal into a pedestal and magically repairs the burnt home around him. Cut to: an unnamed woman (Jennifer Lawrence) who lives in this gorgeous house in the middle of nowhere with her husband (Bardem). He’s a poet of some renown, busy toiling on his next great work (although he appears to be suffering from writer’s block). She’s devotedly renovating their home, painting the walls and such, and seems to have some mystical power to “feel” the heart of the house, by touching the walls and visualizing a giant, pumping organ.

 Soon enough, another man (Ed Harris) shows up, identifying himself as a doctor looking for a place to stay. Bardem (the characters have no names, so it’s easier to identify them by their performers) invites him in and the two rapidly bond, to Lawrence’s discomfort. Harris quickly gets sick, with some unspecified ailment creating a bruise on his side. Then his wife (Michelle Pfeiffer) shows up, unafraid to snipe at Lawrence over the large age gap between her and her husband. Harris, encouraged by Pfeiffer, accidentally breaks Bardem’s crystal, inspiring his rage. The visiting couple’s grown-up kids (Domhnall and Brian Gleeson) then show up and immediately get in a fight, with the elder killing the younger and receiving a scar on his forehead in the struggle. As the family holds a funeral in the house (while Lawrence’s agita only increases), there’s a deluge of water prompted by a guest breaking a fancy sink fixture, which finally drives everyone out for good.

btw this reminds me of a student film I saw in the eighties, made by some dude who thought he could get into my pants by showing me his AMAZING movie and then, when that didn’t work, he asked my dad if he could marry me.  true story.  I’ll leave you to imagine how that worked out for him.

This covers the first half of the film, which, as Orr noted, you could cheekily call a “testament”: one where Bardem is a stand-in for God, Harris and Pfeiffer are Adam (down to his rib injury) and Eve (as much of a temptress as ever), and their kids are Cain and Abel, with the former killing the latter and being “marked” for this primal sin. Bardem’s magic crystal is a violated forbidden fruit, and the burst sink pipes are the flood punishing God’s early followers and wiping the world clean.

 *yawn*  what?  oh, yeah, sorry, I mean it was extremely subtle and not even slightly heavy handed, thank you for explaining the not obvious parallels.

 3.  When the film’s second act begins, Bardem’s new poetry is complete and Lawrence’s character is pregnant. By the end, her baby (likely some sort of stand-in for Christ’s body) has been eaten alive by a crazed mob of Bardem’s followers. They initially burst into the house as fans of his work but devolve into violence and surreal scenes of warfare, ravaging the house before Lawrence burns it down in a fit of grief at the loss of her child. As she dies cursing her husband, Bardem asks for her love, and she assents. It comes in the form of her heart, which he pulls out of her chest and turns into a crystal that he then uses to rebuild the house again, creating a new bride, played by a new actress.

It’s wild stuff— but the Bible allegory only goes so far, even if Aronofsky himself hinted at it when introducing mother! at the Toronto International Film Festival (he referred to Harris’s character as “the man,” then added, “that’s a clue”). Lawrence’s character has no obvious counterpart in either testament; instead, she’s some sort of analogue for Mother Earth, or Gaia, an embodiment of nature and creation, with the house (which slowly gets destroyed by its callous houseguests) a stand-in for the planet itself. Or you could see her as the warmer, welcoming half of the Godhead, with Bardem representing the aloof, unknowable half. There are vague concepts of reincarnation and renewal in the film’s ending, too, more reflective of Hinduism or Buddhism than anything Judeo-Christian. 

jesus fucking christ shut up.  what you, and aronofsky, and jennifer too (I’ve read her Vogue interview, thanks to lili) are missing here is an ancient trope, in which males take a goddess and rob her of her power by handing her power to a new god.  what you are missing is the ancient cycle in which the MALE is the one who is disposable, the Great Goddess the ancient one, the Great Goddess is creator/destroyer, the male is her consort. but he’s taken this and flipped it to the more acceptable (at least much less imaginative), yes, LESS WILD STUFF, version of events, in which the FEMALE becomes disposable.  and incidentally, if she is “gaia”, there’s no second chances and no god to supercede her power.

and leaving aside paganism, just from a general science view, what is innovative about stoking humanity’s hubris and pretending it’s the PLANET that gets destroyed and not, you know, US?

what I’m trying to express here, based on this review, is what is described isn’t innovative at all, it’s just arsty and pretentious but otherwise totally run of the mill patriarchal bullshit, and here, let me…

4.  The joy of mother!, to me, lies beyond the religious metaphor of God and Adam and Eve and so on; judge it just on that level, and it feels bludgeoning from a storytelling perspective. There’s a lot more to dig into, some of it probably conscious on Aronofsky’s part, some of it not so much. He’s spoken in interviews of the environmental message he’s trying to get across, telling The Hollywood Reporter, “I think [the planet’s] being undone by humanity. I don’t blame one gender over the other gender. I think it is about how people are insatiable, how there’s this endless consumption.”

there’s that amazing innovative thinking again, in which 150,000 years of non-insatiable human history ends up as a footnote to what should be a remark on three hundred years of capitalism and instead skews off towards gender (?), by which I mean this was an idiotic statement and if a (especially blonde) woman had made it everyone would be calling her a stupid hollywood bimbo, but aronofsky’s a dude so “oh wow he is so DEEP.”

5.  But, like so many films (especially one with such obvious personal investment on Aronofsky’s part), mother! is clearly also a movie about art and the creative process, one with a rather negative view of the great creator at its center. The brooding Bardem can’t help but hold Lawrence at arm’s length, sometimes storming off to write, other times brushing off her concerns about the invading houseguests (from whom he draws inspiration). Though she loves him, Lawrence can’t help but fixate on the major age difference between them, and after their relationship eventually falls apart, Bardem uses her heart—her inspiration—to build a grand new work and, with it, a new female partner.

I’ll write this out, more literally, in one sentence:  male uses female up and spits her out in the name of art.

(also “after their relationship falls apart” is a unique way of rephrasing “As she dies cursing her husband, Bardem asks for her love, and she assents. It comes in the form of her heart, which he pulls out of her chest and turns into a crystal that he then uses to rebuild the house again, creating a new bride” like omg you fucking weirdo, you just wrote that a few paragraphs ago! did you forget it already?  it was that fucking forgettable to you, the disposable female partner?  well that makes sense, actually, that’s such a boring repetitious done-to-death trope!)

6.  Aronofsky is, ironically,* now romantically involved with Lawrence, though they met during the filming of mother!, well after he’d written the movie. (*not the definition of “ironically”, what you’re looking for is “coincidentally”.  pray continue.) But of course, such industry romances are hardly unusual, and neither is the idea of artists writing about their own relationships; it’s just fascinating how Aronofsky has turned that dynamic into something grand, destructive, and ultimately horrifying. Lawrence’s character, at times, seems like a parody of the “barefoot and pregnant” stereotype, always padding around the house without any footwear. The actress called this a conscious choice, saying, “It never would have been right for my character to wear shoes. Nature is her creation.”

BITCH NO IT IS NOT, everything is HIS creation!  the amazing nameless poet’s creation!  made up of bits and pieces of females he has used up and stolen from! HOW IS THIS DIFFICULT TO GRASP?!?

deep breath

conclusion:

 okay, I haven’t seen this movie.  I’m reviewing the review.  and the review, clearly, on one level, is about a story in which a creator god who doesn’t do much besides stalk about, brood, and not create, lets the guests he’s invited in do whatever they want including EAT HIS WIFE’S BABY and then when she destroys the house she still FORGIVES HIM and gives him HER LITERAL HEART so he can repeat the exact same thing.  one feminist way of reading that is, yeah, this is a warning.  this is what men do, on a small scale and on a global scale.  why do women keep lending themselves to this?  what is the nature of love?  how is it truly love to keep lending yourself to it, to males like this?  but we all know this is not the intent behind this film.

on another level, this is a white boy’s typical film school masturbation piece that happened to get him a super hot girlfriend who is deceiving herself into thinking she is anything other than disposable too, yes, even jennifer lawrence is disposable.  as beyonce said, more or less, the most bomb ass pussy is disposable.  that’s what this movie is about too.

but if gaia is involved, if we decide to lean into the conceit that Nature Herself is involved, guess who is actually disposable?  and guess who doesn’t know how Nature Herself works?

because that’s the thing about taking ancient ideas that are based on truth and twisting them to serve the patriarchy.  men been doing that for centuries, and underneath it sits all kinds of truths, no matter how they try to cover it up.  if aronofsky was making something that was really a commentary on “the environment” and “both genders” and whatever the fuck, it would look more like EVERYONE DIES REGARDLESS OF HOW MUCH POWER THEY HAD BECAUSE THE FEW WHO HAD IT DECIDED CAPITALISM WAS AWESOME, and THE PLANET GOES ON.  this was such a stellar opportunity to make a genuine commentary, no matter how pretentiously and weirdly, but boys done gotta fuck everything up.  lemme fix it, in one paragraph:

enraged by the death of her divine child she burns down the home, including bardem’s unpublished works, and his followers.  bardem comes crawling to her, begging for her love.  she just stares at him as he is consumed in flames.  final scene:  the house is charred, damaged, but already signs of life are appearing, grass between the stones.  it is foggy, but “nature is her creation”, and sadly, in bare feet, comes j-law waltzing softly through her home.  she sighs, and resumes renovating until the next consort crawls out of an ocean and takes a million years to evolve away his gills.