#i like being the only thing in the tag (a lie. it pains me)
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— IN THE WAKE OF FLAMES. PT III
eris vanserra x archeron!reader
summary: even before you became fae, your favourite season was autumn. it’s a little hard to hide this when your least favourite newly appointed high lord has made it his life’s mission to be the most annoying male in your life.
a/n: sorry for such a long break!! pls let me know what u think and again if you’d like to be added to the tag list send me a message or ask as I rarely check my notifs and go back to them. also sorry abt the cliffhanger uhmmmm also unedited ok bye
“You look like crap.”
Your eyes flutter open to see Mor scrunching up her face as she peers at you from her seat across your own at the dining table. It takes a second for her words to register and you throw a belated scowl her way.
“Good morning to you too,” you mumble, sitting up to continue swirling your spoon around your bowl of barely eaten oatmeal. Your appetite seems to have vanished over the past week, but you try and force a spoonful down your throat, nearly gagging.
Mor narrows her eyes at you and her lips press into a thin line of concern. “No, you seriously look like crap. You’re not eating lately and you were literally asleep at the table when I got here.”
“I wasn’t asleep,” you say, defensively. “I was resting my eyes.”
“You sound like Cassian after a three hour afternoon nap.”
“I’m just having a little trouble sleeping.” You set your spoon down and push the offending bowl away from you before slumping in your seat. You brush off her skeptical look with a wave of your hand. “I’m always like this after absorbing Fae magic.”
And over the last few days you’ve been absorbing a lot. All in an attempt to find out as much as you could about the Fae rebel group that had been attacking the borders of multiple Courts, in order to weaken them and make a point against you.
Well, you and your sisters. Not all of Prythian was accepting of Feyre for how she was Made, and even less so of you and Nesta and Elain. Instead, they viewed you as unnatural mutations and the whispers had only become worse after the War. It seemed that the lack of conflict looming over Prythian was unacceptable in their eyes.
With the help of your powers and Azriel’s shadows, you were closer than ever to finding them. Truthfully, the idea that there were Fae out there who hated you didn’t bother you so much in the sense of feeling like outcasts, but you couldn’t lie. They were starting to be a giant pain in your ass.
“You’re never like this,” Mor scoffs, gesturing to the bags under your eyes and the hollowness of your cheeks. As her voice raises, the pounding of your head gets more intense and you attempt to hold back a grimace. “Why is it affecting you so much this time?”
“It’s the type of magic I’m absorbing,” you practically whine, abandoning all pretences of being okay and allowing your shoulders to drop. “It’s so angry and harsh and impure, Mor! It’s literally making me sick because I have nowhere else to redirect it.”
At that moment Rhysand and Feyre walk in to join you at the table.
Rhysand, having overheard you, chimes in as he reaches for a plate of fruit. “Good news, our little Siphon,” he nudges you lightly, the nickname making you scrunch your nose up in mock annoyance. “We have enough information now to move forward using Az and Cass and resources from other Courts. The only thing we need you to do now is rest.”
Rhysand’s upbeat tone brings a weak smile to your face. You know that he’s being flippant to make you feel better, like he always does when you’re stressed or unwell and you’re nothing but appreciative as he whistles under his breath, nonchalantly piling some fruit onto a plate for you.
“You should have been resting days ago,” Feyre eyes you from beside Rhys with furrowed brows, taking in your tired form. “We told you yesterday would be too much.”
You groan, burying your face in your hands. “Give me a couple hours and I’ll be fine for the meeting in Summer.”
Mor snorts and looks up at you, amused. When you raise an eyebrow, her smile drops into an incredulous expression. “You’re not serious.”
“I need to be there to discuss what I siphoned from that knife we found at the border of Dawn,” you say, holding up a hand and rushing out the rest of your words when Feyre opens her mouth to speak. “And Rhys promised me I would be there since it’ll be all the High Lords, Court informants and even soldiers. I couldn’t possibly not go.”
Feyre sighs, sensing that you’re not going to back down. She nods slowly, pointing at your plate. “Finish all of your breakfast and your lunch later on and then you can go.”
You let out a breath, feeling nauseous when Rhys slides your plate closer to you and simply shrugs when you glare at him. Traitor, you speak to him in your mind. He suddenly becomes very interested in a strawberry.
“Watch me,” you say confidently, waving your fork at Feyre who rolls her eyes at you and goes back to her own breakfast.
Summer court is your least favourite court at the best of times, though you’d never admit that to sweet and kind Tarquin, who’s arguably one of your favourite High Lords.
The beautiful, shimmering lagoons aren’t of interest to you as large bodies of water have always unsettled you. The warm breeze that everyone welcomes always reminds you of the times you had to suffer through sweltering heat when foraging for food with Feyre in your adolescence. You’ve always preferred a colder climate and appreciated a more muted daylight.
Considering your current health, the ripples in the water make you dizzy and the light salty breeze nearly brings your breakfast and lunch up.
You’re thankful for the sheer, thin material of the sage coloured dress that Nuala and Cerridwen chose for you because you suddenly feel a sheen of sweat covering your body.
“Are we done sightseeing?” you ask weakly, desperate to be inside already.
Elain turns to you and winces. “You don’t look too good….”
“Aw, thank you, Elain.”
“That’s not what I mean,” she tuts, coming over to fan your face with her hands. You swat them away, sputtering and try to catch Rhysand’s attention to move things along. He reluctantly agrees and gestures everyone to move along, too used to your aversion to Summer.
As you all enter the palace made of gleaming marble, you hang further back to avoid the watchful eyes of Feyre who seems to be waiting to send you right back home to rest.
The palace is beautiful and you push down your nausea to look around and take in the tall arched windows. The jewelled embellishments adorning the frames trail higher and higher and you crane your neck to see them.
This turns out to be a mistake when your vision starts to blur and another wave of nausea causes your steps to falter, the world tilting sharply.
A firm hand grips your elbow in an all too familiar fashion, steadying you before you’re sent flying to the ground. Another hand settles around your waist where the cutout of your dress exposes your now damp skin, glittering with sweat.
You look up and find Eris’ amber eyes locked onto your own.
“Foolish,” he mutters, his voice sharp with irritation, yet his hands remain steady in their position, holding you up. It’s the first word he’s uttered to you since your encounter a couple of weeks ago in the Spring Court where he’d left on frosty terms. You had seen him twice since then, but it was in the middle of meetings and siphoning sessions and he had barely spared you a single glance.
Your lips part but your senses are too overwhelmed to think of a response before he carries on, lightly shaking his head at you. “You overexert yourself all week and then travel here? What are you trying to prove?”
“I’m fine,” you manage to say, pulling away from him, but his grip only tightens. You can’t help glancing around and noticing that the growing crowd of all the Court officials has separated you from the Inner Circle. You huff out a breath as you register his words. You knew Rhysand had to communicate with the other High Lords with updates, but you didn’t know that included your physical state. “Gods, High Lords are such gossips…”
“You’re not fine,” he says, scowling like you’ve dreadfully inconvenienced him by nearly collapsing. His gaze flickers over the pallor of your skin and the way you’ve started to shiver slightly. “You drained yourself dry this week. And for what? To impress Rhysand? To prove something to him?”
“Let go of me, Eris,” you attempt to snap at him, but even you can hear the lack of strength in your voice. His eyes soften slightly when you say his name without your usual bite. “I can’t have this same conversation with you when I’m like this.”
“You think I want to be the one always catching you from falling on your face? Trust me when I say I have things I would rather be doing,” he mutters, narrowing his eyes.
You grit your teeth at the reminder and heat flares in your cheeks, whether it’s from embarrassment, anger or the climate of Summer, you don’t know.
Before you can retort, Eris sighs and straightens you up, still not fully letting you go. Releasing the hand around your waist, he loops your arm in his own and makes you lean on him for support. To your utter surprise, he doesn’t say anything as he starts walking towards the meeting room where everyone else files in. Despite your frustration, you’re grateful for his strength.
The moment of blissful silence doesn’t last too long, however. As he begins to lead you to where your family is stood and clearly looking around frantically for you, Eris leans in to whisper in your ear. “You need to sit down at the table,” he orders quietly, High Lord behaviour on full display.
You’re about to argue that no one else is going to be sat and he immediately catches this, cutting you off. “Don’t be stubborn for once in your life,” he murmurs, breath warm against your ear, making you shiver more than you already were. “Please?”
You quickly turn your head to meet his, shocked at the pleading in his voice. You didn’t realise how close this would bring your own face to his and words leave you. Thankfully, you’ve reached your family as you hear Cassian’s loud voice and it snaps you out of your little bubble.
“Finally!” he exclaims, throwing his arms up in exasperation. “We were about to send a search and rescue team, thinking you’d finally collapsed.”
“Why didn’t you?” Eris asks, coldly.
Cassian merely rolls his eyes at Eris’ attitude and gestures at Azriel.
Feyre comes forward to take your other arm in hers and explains. “Azriel’s shadows informed us that you were with her, Eris.” She smiles warmly and sincerely at him and Rhysand nods at him in recognition of his actions. “Thank you for looking after my sister.”
Eris shakes his head. “Don’t thank me yet. I foresee many falls in her near future that I’m sure I won’t be present for.”
Feyre’s mouth twitches, but she quickly smoothes her face into an expressionless one when you frown at her and she busies herself with disentangling you from Eris.
He takes a step back, dark and fiery hair catching the sunlight through the tall windows and glances at you once more, not breaking eye contact, yet his words are directed towards Feyre. “Just make sure she sits down. The Night Court doesn’t need a martyr,” he says drily, before walking away.
Your mouth goes dry at the double meaning in his words, but you can’t shake off the shock at seeing genuine concern in his eyes. You must have looked practically near death, but you appreciated it all the same and you don’t even realise your eyes are lingering on him as he walks away until Feyre sits you down next to Nesta.
Your older sister raises an eyebrow at you, always so intuitive and you swat weakly at her to look away from you. Cassian’s eyes flit back and forth between you two, confused.
Before he can say anything, the meeting commences and you feel a shift in the energy of the room, full to the brim of Court officials, emissaries, a few warriors and of course, the High Lords around the table.
Your turn to speak comes fairly quickly since the most information regarding the Rebels is from you and Azriel. As per Rhysand’s instructions, you don’t go into any details regarding your siphoning powers, instead just sharing the information you gained due to them. You try to ignore the way people are staring at your weak form, but you continue to speak with all the strength you can muster. Evidently, you’re doing a convincing job as people start to nod, satisfied and scribble things down.
When Azriel’s turn arrives, you zone out a little, already having heard everything a few times over. Your ears only perk up when everyone is discussing plans of action against the Rebels and a question is asked in your general direction.
“Who are we thinking is to be at the front lines of this hypothetical mission?” The question comes from one of the Spring Court advisors, Vaelith, an older Fae with silver hair gathered in one long braid down his back.
His gaze lingers on you for only a split second before moving onto Rhysand and you feel compelled to answer. “Myself and Azriel,” you blurt out, before you can think twice. “And others of course, but the two of us are the most familiar with-”
“We’re all aware of the Shadowsinger’s abilities,” Vaelith interrupts you, holding up a hand to stop you from talking. You hold back a scowl. “What makes you suitable to lead such a mission aside from your… familiarity with a selection of items left behind by these Rebels?”
“I’m more than able to-” you cut yourself off and swallow, gaining yourself a second to think of a way to defend yourself without giving away your powers, as per your High Lord’s request.
Careful, Y/N
Rhysand’s voice sounds clear as day in your head and you try not to wince at the volume considering the silence of the rest of the room. The other High Lords knew of your powers, but Rhysand had requested they keep it to themselves, even from their own Court officials. Whether or not Rhysand had used his Daemati abilities to ensure this, you didn’t want to know.
“I’m more than able to assist in a plan of action,” you continue firmly, voice hardening. “I’m not sure if you remember a certain War we just had, but you may wish to remind yourself who was at the front lines of that.”
A few laughs break the tense silence and some people start muttering, slowly raising the volume of the room. You almost don’t hear Vaelith’s next words. “You haven’t really answered my question.”
“Let’s use our senses, Vaelith,” a voice rings out from further down the table and you’re startled to realise that Eris is speaking up. The room finally quietens down and you sit up impossibly straight, surprised that Eris is about to defend you.
You couldn’t be more wrong.
He only spares you a fleeting glance, but even from your seat you could see it’s full of amusement and mocking. The thing that surprises you is that the mocking is directed at you. “Look at her. Are you really questioning the abilities of a female who barely has the strength to sit up in her seat, let alone fight?”
Your stomach drops, a ball of humiliation unfurling in your chest as he continues to speak.
“I’d like to believe Rhysand has more sense than to send someone on the frontlines who would just be doing the rebels a favour,” Eris drawls, raising an eyebrow at Rhys, still avoiding your gaze.
Rhysand nods. “I can assure you I’ll only be sending my strongest soldiers, Vaelith,” he smirks, faintly, as though the implication he’d do anything to suggest otherwise is laughable. “Now may we discuss matters of actual importance? Tarquin, what have your soldiers been preparing?”
The tension dissolves almost immediately, but you’re still shellshocked, shaking with anger rather than weakness now. It’s as though you’ve been pumped with a burst of adrenaline and it doesn’t seem to be dampening.
After the conversation has shifted to a completely different subject, you shift from your seat as discretly as possible and mutter to Nesta that you need some air before standing up.
You look at the High Lord of Autumn before you walk away, but it only infuriates you more. Eris doesn’t look anywhere near you, but his jaw is clenched all the same, as though he can feel you glaring at him.
Mor catches your arm as you’re walking out and hisses in your ear. “You’re still not well,” she turns her body fully towards you. “Wait for me to come with you.”
“Don’t worry,” you say, shaking your head and clenching your fists to keep them from trembling as you speak through gritted teeth. “I feel suddenly energised. I’ll only be outside.”
Mor gives you a once over and is clearly satisfied with the fact that you’re unlikely to collapse again as she nods and releases your arm, allowing you to rush through the crowd of people and push through the guards.
You walk briskly away from the doors of the meeting room and further down the empty hallway until you’re satisfied that no one will hear your heavy breathing.
You lean against a pillar, exhaling in and out to control your anger and keep the tears at bay. Gods, you feel so stupid. Of course, Eris is incapable of being a decent male to anyone, let alone to you. Damn him and his cruel smirk and damn Rhysand too for allowing it to happen.
Brushing away the tears that have managed to fall, you curse yourself for not just pushing him away and allowing yourself to collapse on the hard marble flooring. It was giving you whiplash the way he could be so full of concern one second and practically call you useless in front of a room full of officials the next.
The longer you stand against the marble pillar, the weaker you begin to feel and that burst of adrenaline you previously felt is no longer present. The anger that fuelled you mere seconds ago is now winding you and a rising sense of panic begins to consume you.
You decide to turn around to walk back so you’re closer to the doors of the meeting room in case you embarrassingly do collapse.
However, the second you take a step, a flash of movement in the corner of your eye is all the warning you get before strong arms clamp around you from behind and a cloth is pressed against your mouth and nose, preventing you from breathing. You can’t even scream as the scent of something strong and chemical floods your senses, making your vision blur.
You thrash around in an attempt to use the little strength you have left to escape, but the arms only grip you harder and the world begins to spin. The last thing you feel is the cool marble floor as your knees give out and no one bothers to catch you as you hit the ground, darkness swallowing you whole.
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#eris vanserra imagines#eris vanserra x y/n#eris vanserra x reader#eris vanserra x you#eris vanserra fanfiction#eris vanserra#eris x you#eris x reader#eris fanfic#eris acotar#eris x oc
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pool - samia
#yes it's the reimagined version which is just hands down one of my favorite songs ever#original pool is very very special to me as well#anyways if you thought the samia art was slowing down i have some news for you#i like being the only thing in the tag (a lie. it pains me)#and i love this zine so much#got to try so many new things with this one. the back cover i liked so much that i was hesitant to put the words on#samia#samia the band#lyric zine#zines#✨
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And the cycle begins anew . As it does every week
#vent continued in tags sorry gang#every fucking monday ma ends up pissed and yelling about SOMETHING#sorry that im taking the meds that actually help and im not miserable and in pain all the time and throwing up all the time and i didn't#hear the baby making a mess at four in the morning . shocker that the meds that knock me out would prevent me from waking up to hear that#and its not like i can even be upset that she's mad . i was mad . i am mad . i did my best to clean it up#and its not like he only got into her shit. he got into my shit too. he ruined and wasted my stuff too.#when he was able to get into my room and destroy things all the time it was always “dont act like that#he doesn't understand . you cant be mad at him#why would you leave it out if you didn't want it destroyed“ as if i had any other fucking option#maybe if i didn't have fuckin . 8 sheets of drywall (?)#two metal floor vents and a fucking DOOR just sitting in my room i'd have space fo put my stuff and i wouldn't bitch about it#he doesn't get into my room anymore because i have a lock that i have to carry the key for around 24/7#but i do myfucking best to keep him from getting into shit but i CANT DO THAT ALL THE TIME#ESPECIALLY NOT AT FOUR IN THE MORNING WHEN HE IS ACTIVELY BEING SNEAKY AND IM SO KNOCKED OUT I COULD WOULD AND HAVE SLEPT THROUGH TORNADO#SIRENS . SHOCKER THAT HES ABLE TO DESTROY SHIT WHEN IM IN SUCH A STATE . WHO COULD'VE PREDICTED THIS .#im trapped here i can never fucking leave jesus christ#i can never leave. what the hell am i gonna do#i cant do this for the rest of my life . i want to move away so bad but i cant even do that#im too disabled to work like i need to to support myself i cant move to another state but its the only way i'd be able to escape this#unless i move to fuckin . chicago or some shit#god i hate it here i hate myself for not being able to handle it and being upset and being dramatic about it all#and i hate myself for being so tired of it because i dont have any excuse and i hate myself for being so upset that im not able to have#a social life and being jealous of my younger coworkers that talk about hanging out with their friends or like . goin to the fucking park#on a weekday and not being constantly messaged about how bad their baby brother is and how they need to come home asap and#how they aren't wrecked by the guilt of being out even on the weekends and i hate that im so jealous of them#and i hate how embarrassing it is that im the only one of my coworkers who doesn't get asked what they're doing on weekdays anymore because#everybody knows exactly what im doing. im staying at home watching the baby#and i hate how humiliated i am every time one of my friends cancels plans last minute and i hate that i lie to my ma about why plans change#god that got long and obnoxious . sorry gang (me rereading my tags later)#puppmeo misery
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❛ FUCK YOU LIKE . . . AN ANIMAL ?! ❜ — NANAMI KENTO.
synopsis. your husband nanami kento has always secretly prided himself on being the one to tame you. but what happens when you, a fully grown werewolf, gets exposed to the full moon while curse hunting together in an abandoned building? spoilers: you chase, he runs. wc. 2.9k
tags. top werewolf reader, bottom! nanami. reader has a cock. bit of sub top / dom bottom dynamic. monsterfucking, rimming, anal sex, male squirting, overstimulation, multiple orgasms, dry orgasm, creampie, knotting, biting, stomach bulge, flavoured lube, praise kink (reader receiving), breeding kink, nanami gets his ass eaten for 2k.
Full moon. That only meant one thing.
“Kentoo,” you crooned, and it sounded strange with your fangs growing and getting in the way, words forming in low gurgles. “I'm getting bored. Come out and play with me.”
You could hear his breathing sounds all the way down the hallway: the vague inhale, the hurried exhale. Second or third door to your right, probably under a desk, with his hands clamped over his mouth. He was hiding. From you.
You could feel your innards metamorphosing, heat boiling low in your core, resisting the urge to rip off all your clothes and bask in the silver light streaming through the broken window that had caused this mess in the first place. Dark grey fur had burst through your skin moments before at first contact with the full moon—your legs bowing back, bones crackling, the rest of your body except for your face shifting into some sort of hybrid between beast and man.
You gave in to the instinct to hunch over, like a predator stalking prey. And maybe you were.
“Kento?” you called out, an innocent and curious lilt to your voice, pretending that you didn’t already know his whereabouts. “Are you…” You pushed open the first door to your right, a creak resounding in the abandoned building, a stark contrast to your light and silent footsteps. “Here?”
Nanami’s breath quickened, and so did his heartbeat. Thump, thump, thump. You wanted to eat him.
“Kento… come on, it’s not that funny anymore…” you mumbled, the exaggerated pout clear in your voice, retreating from the empty room and slowly making your way to the second door. “I miss you a lot…”
The second room was also empty. You pretended to sigh despite the excited twitch in your pants as you caught a whiff of his mouth-watering scent, sharp and clean and masculine—not something that alphas would go for typically, but to you, it was ecstasy. You licked your lips in sweet anticipation, sauntering over to the third and final door.
“There’s no need to hide, y’know… we’d be so good to you.” Half of that was a lie. You were going to press him into the ground and defile him the moment you get your hands on him, submitting to your instincts to mate and breed—if the huge, excited bulge at the front of your trousers wasn’t enough proof of that. “Tell me, are you—”
You flung the door open.
“—here?”
The wind rustled through the half-opened window on the other side, but the room was… empty, to your surprise. Nanami had probably escaped through the same window, but that wasn’t all. Surely enough, lying under a desk near the wall, was your husband’s yellow spotted tie, neatly folded and left in his place to taunt you.
“Kento,” you growled, displeasure coursing through you, but you bent down to pick up the tie, bringing it up to smother your face, breathing heavily in the lingering scent. Delicious. You would have your revenge.
You ended up stalking your way back home, following the trail of his scent, cock straining against the fabric of your pants, swollen and heavy and painful, like the rest of your body. You had discarded your shirt somewhere on the road, your body overheating too much to care about being shirtless in public.
Sweat trickled down your back and shoulders, your scent glands dripping with fragrant oil at the back of your neck. The moon was right behind you, and your awaiting prey was right inside the house before you. You would have him, finally. He would be yours.
The door was already open when you reached it, the strong, assured scent of your mate safely resting inside your territory making you giddy with pride, a constant subvocal growl ringing at the back of your throat. “Kento…” you warbled, making your way up the stairs towards your shared room. “Ten seconds. And then I’m coming in.”
“... It’s alright,” a muffled voice said, coughing lightly. “I’ve already… prepared myself.”
And that was the only green light that you needed.
You snarled, leaping up the remaining flight of stairs and slamming into the doorframe, the door forcefully bursting open. You could hear his choked-up gasp before you laid your eyes on him. His goggles were removed and lying beside him on the nightstand, and you salivated at the sight of his mostly naked body, blue dress shirt unbuttoned and a breeze away from slipping off the shoulders that you so desperately wanted to sink your teeth into.
“Mate,” you purred, eyes trained onto his hard, leaking cock against his stomach as you palmed yourself through your pants. “My mate.”
Nanami visibly swallowed, backing up against the bedframe, his hips lifting slightly to show you the efforts he had made to please you. A pink, puffy asshole, stretched wide enough that you could see the lube trickling out from within.
“Yeah,” he breathed, leaning his head back to expose his throat, an act of submission that he knew would make you feral. “All yours. Come n’ get me.”
You growled louder, stalking forward on your hands and knees.
He feigned composure, despite the fact that you could hear his heart pounding wildly from where you were, the slight hitch in his breath that gave away his fear and uncertainty. Keeping his eye contact with you, he reached between his legs to stroke his cock slowly, pumping pre-cum out. “Oh… yes. Reminds me. Did you bring my tie back?”
“Yeah,” you murmured, reaching back to pull out his tie from your pocket, albeit it was crumpled and soaked in your drool. He winced at its poor state, taking it from you anyway.
“Thank you,” he muttered. “... Always so good.”
You crooned at the praise, climbing onto the bed with little grace and crawling between his parted thighs, immediately nuzzling affectionately into his neck, jaw firmly snapped shut despite your instincts telling you to bite. “... I caught you.”
“You caught me,” Nanami echoed, looking at you—this version of you—with an expression no less than tender. You were somewhat larger than him, now, and certainly not human, staring down at him with golden, eerie eyes, hungry and strange, and he stared right back into them, unfazed.
All of this was making you hungry. You bared your teeth as you leaned in again, wanting to mark him up as yours already.
“Later,” he chided, pushing your face away, and then reached over to pull your swollen cock out from your trousers, calloused hands thumbing gently at the tip. “This first.”
“Okay,” you groaned, the small amount of pleasure already making it hard to focus, warmth stirring in your abdomen. It was funny how you had promised yourself you would ruin him the second he was in your hands, but now that he was, you didn’t even bother to resist his command. “Anything you want.”
You smiled innocently, and you watched as his gaze softened, features relaxing.
He let go of you to turn around, knowing that you preferred it when he was presenting as an omega werewolf would, but you grabbed his ankles, grip tight and keeping him in place. “No.” You shook your head, frowning. “I’m not—not fucking any omega. I’m fucking you tonight, Kento.”
Nanami made an appreciative noise at the back of his throat, almost a whine if you didn’t know any better. “That’s... good. That’s very good,” he says, breathless. “Fuck me, then.”
You slid your hands up his bare thighs, the tender touch making him shiver, before you cupped the back of his knees, very, very slowly pushing them against his chest until he was one press away from being bent in half. His eyes were sharp, trained onto your every movement, but you could feel the intensity resting within, the heat and desire, the impatience.
You wanted to play with him, so very badly.
“What are you—” He let out a choked groan at the first swipe of your tongue against his hole, hand shooting forward to grip the fur at the top of your head tightly. “—hngh.”
You sucked wetly at his rim, tasting the flavoured lube that you had jokingly got him as an anniversary gift, tangy and disgustingly sweet. Fuck. You were drooling already.
“Kento,” you whined, burying your face between his asscheeks as your tongue slowly breached and unbreached him, careful not to graze him with your fangs. “Tastes so good. Wanna eat you.”
What the fuck. Eat him? Did he hear you correctly?
And he might just be too worked up, but why did it feel thicker and longer than usual?
“Don’t—lie,” he gasped out, struggling not to rut up against your hot mouth, to take you deeper inside his hole. “I chose the- the worst flavour possible.”
“It’s you,” you murmured, crooning with delight as his hands moved to spread himself open for you, further exposing his sensitive hole. “You always taste so good, no matter what. You always smell good, too.”
“You sure talk a lot,” he grits out, stifling a moan. “For someone who promised to fuck me.”
You bit down a smirk at how subtly eager he was being. “I’ll get to that, don’t worry. Just—this first. Please?” He scowled at the fact that you were using his words against him so sweetly, but he relented silently, pushing his hips towards your face as you slid a pillow under the small of his back, immediately returning to stretching him open with your tongue.
“Oh—”
His lips parted to let out a deep, sexy groan as you jabbed at his prostate, not once, but twice, and you kept going, enjoying the sight of your mate falling apart.
“Fuck.” His thighs were trembling, his head thrown back at the intense pleasure, because no, you weren’t just eating him out, you were making out with his fucking asshole. Every lick and probe of your thick, thick tongue made stars explode before his eyes in the most insane way possible, touching him in places inside him that even he didn’t know existed.
That insatiable tongue of yours. Nanami couldn’t decide if he hated or loved it more. It was making these obscene squelching noises, with all the lube and saliva being pushed further into his hole with every wet thrust, making room for more. It didn’t help that you were a messy eater, smearing drool all over his ass and thighs, looking at him with such hunger that made him dizzy with desire.
My husband, who is a werewolf… is eating me out.
Nanami grabs his cock hurriedly, pumping it quick enough to chafe if it weren’t for pre continuously dribbling down the side of it, crying out hoarsely as one clawed finger rubbed on a specific spot on his perineum, stimulating his prostate from both ends.
“Haah, fuck, please—” he cried out, grip on your fur now tight enough that you could almost feel the strands being ripped from their roots. He couldn't wait anymore, he needed you now, and preferably inside him. “Fuck me. I said it. Please.”
To his absolute horror, you only growled into his hole in response, ignoring his pleas, too lost in the feeling of it clenching repeatedly around your tongue. The squelching sounds grew louder as you slurped him frantically. Everything he did only spurred you on, and you grabbed onto his hips with your claws to dig deeper.
“Ahh—haah, shit!” Nanami’s breath was laboured and shaky, eyes squeezed shut as he could do nothing but take you and everything else that you had to give him. “Please, sweetheart, feels too good... I’m gonna—ah, gonna cum, but I don’t want it t-to end like this, please. Want you inside me, not like this…”
He can’t possibly keep going, it’s not possible. He must be tired of it now, and even if not, his jaw should be—
He was shivering as the pleasure bordered on painful overstimulation, tears gathering in his eyes as he grabbed the base of his cock—fighting with everything not to cum, even as you snarled against his hole in sharp disapproval, showing your fangs. “No—listen to me—hnngh. Th-thought you were gonna give me—anything I wanted. Let me- let me make you feel good, too. D-don’t you want to knot me?”
Of course you wanted to knot him, keep him lodged on your cock for hours, days, for as long as he allowed you to. Breed him full of your puppies, even—make him carry them. But if he was using a brainless assumption like you not feeling any pleasure as a reason for you to stop, then he would have to try harder.
You forced your entire tongue inside his tight rim, as deep as you could reach, rubbing firm clockwise circles into his perineum.
Nanami was letting out a stream of the most unholy noises you had ever heard, whimpering lewdly as he could feel the cum bursting past the tight restriction his hand had formed around his cock. “Gonna cum—” he choked out, back arching and toes curling as he crammed his thighs hard around your head, your fangs digging into skin—making you see stars. “Oh, fuuuuck—”
He screamed out hoarsely as he came with violence, cock squirting everywhere, thick watery spurts painting his abdomen and both of your chests, with a few stray drops splattering onto his face and collarbones. You reached a hand out to hastily jerk him off while continuing to knead your tongue insistently on his sweet spot, wanting to milk his orgasm to the fullest—and he let out a dry, pathetic sob, orgasming for a second time, legs jerking as cum dribbled out from his spent cock.
He pushed a hand onto your face, shivering and shaking his head.
“F-fuck, puppy, no more.”
You pulled your tongue out from his hole as you panted, making him whine breathily at the sudden emptiness. The slip of his nickname for you had barely registered in your head, your eyes immediately zeroing in on his plump, heaving chest, now decorated with strips of his release. Almost as if you were possessed, you leaned down, drooling as you pressed fang-shaped hickeys into his muscled pecs while eagerly licking up his squirt and cum.
It was sweet. All of Kento was sweet, and you wanted more.
Nanami shuddered helplessly as you grazed his nipple with your sharp teeth before running your tongue over the abused nub, as though to apologise. This was… okay. It felt good, in a strange way. Soothing, even, especially after what you had done to him. That violent hunger, that insatiability. You were relentless.
But before he knew it, there was something thick and hard rubbing on his swollen entrance, something way too big to be considering intrusion.
“You said you’d let me knot you,” you mumbled, “Kento.”
He bit down a shudder, fighting down a wave of panic. “No. No, I didn’t say that—don’t twist my words. I asked if you wanted to knot me. Before I came.”
“Same thing,” you said, already pushing in—and he let out a barely audible cry, voice completely wrecked from all the begging earlier. “You said you want t-to make me feel good, right?”
“Yes, b-but that was then. It’s too- too sensitive now, at least give me some time—”
You groaned loudly as you bullied your way in with one strong thrust, burying yourself to the hilt inside his warm hole as his walls spasmed and tightened around you. “That’s more like it.”
Nanami was wrecked.
Tears were spilling down his cheeks, soft, overstimulated whimpers spilling out from parted lips as his cock twitched uselessly, trapped between you and the swell of his stomach.
“You… really don’t listen, do you…”
“Sorry,” you murmured, nuzzling his neck in apology. You didn’t sound sorry at all, and you knew it.
You gave a shallow, experimental thrust, the base of your cock already swelling heavily with knot, all worked up from all the noises your mate was making earlier. “Kento…” you moaned, sharp claws digging into his meaty thighs as you knot-fucked him deeper, making him take you all the way. “You’re making me feel so good…”
Seconds turned into minutes and minutes turned into what seemed like hours of you fucking him into the mattress, wringing orgasm out of orgasm out of him as you fucked him through all three of your knots, each one bigger than the last.
He gave a feeble moan as your hips finally stuttered to a stop, letting your final knot catch. There was a bulge visible over his abdomen as you filled him up with the warmth of your seed, groaning loudly, and Nanami let out a soundless whine in return, hips bucking weakly as his cock jumped, no longer able to cum.
You grinned dopily, feeling pride surge through your chest. You were the one who had made him like this.
You were tired, and he was exhausted. The both of you were panting heavily, but it didn’t stop you from taking one long look at your mate, your husband, and feeling a surge of want, no, need—to kiss him. His tired eyes, his sharp cheekbones, his soft lips, all of it—fanged and brutal and loving.
Nanami’s trembling hand reached over to grasp your clawed one, entwining it with his in an intimate gesture. You watched carefully as he brought it to his face and gently pressed your ringed finger to his lips, eyes screaming out to you with an affection so intense it almost made you forget how to breathe. Take what you want, they were saying. Take what you want from me, and I’ll give you all that’s left.
Golden eyes gleaming in the dark, you returned his gaze with a similar one of your own.
kinktober masterlist! masterlist!
#kinktober ‘24!#✧ blood of reptile.#top male reader#dom male reader#nanami x reader#nanami x male reader#jjk x reader#jjk x male reader#nanami#jujutsu kaisen#nanami smut#jujutsu kaisen smut#nanami kento smut#nanami kento x reader#nanami x you#top reader#dom reader#male reader#x male reader#nanami kento#bottom character#sub character#jujutsu kaisen x reader#jujutsu kaisen x male reader#sub jjk#bottom male character#jjk smut#kinktober
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random confession time, i need a mental hygene moment
when i say i’m tired ‘cause i had a bad night i don’t mean i had a hard time falling asleep, it neither means me having bad dreams or just randomly waking up in the middle of the night. that’s my usual sleeping experience. i refer to nights like yesterday, waking up with a dislocated finger.
#DISCLAIMER: MENTION AND BRIEF DISCUSSION OF SELFHARM (intentional and unintentional) BOTH IN POST AND TAGS#MOSTLY IN TAGS#FEEL FREE TO SKIP#............................................................................................................................................#____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________#all my life people called me a liar behind my back for stuff like this and it desensitizes you so fucking much towards your own shit#and like.. there is this dissonance in your head cause there is this injury you didn't had going to sleep but it's there when you wake up#but everyone dismisses it as you playing for attention.. bitch i hate my existance being acknowledged in general#i certainly do not need people fawning over me for a supposedly fake injury#i mean yeah i'm not saying i'm not prone to self harm cause that would be a lie but i'm far from being suicidal#but doing it on purpose for a reason and literally being unable to do anything about it while sleeping is a vastly different state of mind#it stops being a choice at that point because there is no choice while you are not conscious#i don't even remember how many times i had to make up some random story about an injury because the 'i dunno i was sleeping'#isn't really an explanation people want to hear#it implies too heavily that 'you have some issues' for it makes peeps around you uncomfortable#especially not talking about stuff like stabbing myself in the leg or scratching my skin off until i bleed or skipping painkillers and shit#okay me skipping painkillers is a twofold thing because i don't only need the pain from my leg at times to focus but i'm prone to addictions#i like me some free pain sue me#whatever not important#i'm just having a weird moment and i had to whine about my unintentional injuries and shit#i also drank 4 cans of energy drink after a bit over two weeks of not having one and i have way to much energy#which is good because i felt like shit since the winter holidays so this is a better state of existing in general#but i dunno i'm buzzing and i had to get this out#there isn't really any point to it i just had to#levynn cries about nonsense#levynn tries to think
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Growing Pains Pt 2 | Oscar Piastri x Reader
Summary: Oscar thought leaving was the best thing for you, but quickly realised he cannot function without you.
Warnings: Swearing. Fluff. Suggestive content.
2024 season. Childhood sweethearts. No facelaim, just rando Pinterest pics
This acc just ended up being Landoscar fluff because I consumed too much of them after Silverstone lol
F1 Masterlist
prev.
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mclaren just posted
liked by aussiegrit, ln4 and others
mclaren oscar’s post race interviews #bahraingp
2,559 comments
mclaren please enjoy some clips of our aussie talking about the one aspect of his life NOT involved with his job
→ user1 did mclaren just hard launch a relationship?
→ user2 no because why did they post clips that specifically don’t mention a name
→ user3 yes but the familiarity of the way he’s talking about this girl must mean it’s one he’s known since he was 14???
danielricciardo caught simping in 4k
thisisnotyn oscar sweaty got me feeling some kind of way
charles_leclerc oh god, that goofy smile is back. i know what that means
→ maxverstappen1 he’s going to start yapping more than i do
→ user4 what do you know?!
alex_albon mate, i’m not going to lie, i don’t think we can defend you from this anymore
→ oscarpiastri you sent me memes of my face. you have never defended me
→ georgerussell63 join the club. wait until he sends you reaction gifs
→ landonorris i love getting those
YourUserName pookie
→ user5 um, is she calling oscar pookie?
→ user6 well, it’s not going to be lando. he was only in one of the clips
→ user7 idk, we don’t know what happened between them. it could’ve been a bad breakup and she might be trying to piss them off
→ landonorris ew, no. it’s not me. they made up weeks ago btw. no way osco would’ve lasted this long without his yn
→ YourUserName what do you mean ew! you’d be lucky to have me
→ danielricciardo no he wouldn’t
oscarpiastri i also talked a lot about my performance in the race
→ landonorris and where is that footage, huh??? funny how it doesn’t exist
→ oscapiastri yn says you’re not allowed to tag along to date night anymore because you insulted both of us
→ landonorris :(
→ user8 what do you mean he tagged along on date night?
→ user9 why are we skipping past the fact that lando confirmed that they’re back together
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YourUserName just posted
liked by landonorris, charles_leclerc and others
YourUserName ladies, get a boyfriend who looks at you the way Oscar looks at Lando (actually, can you get me one first because mine seems to be broken)
1,142 comments
oscarpiastri whoa, you told me i was a handsome boy. that photo doesn’t look like a handsome boy
→ YourUserName some people are into the serial killer eyes. not me though, that’s why i’m asking the fans to find me a new bf
→ logansargeant i’ll help
→ user10 we know which side logan is choosing in the divorce
landonorris how does it feel to know that your boyfriend likes me more
→ YourUserName i know how to cut brake lines
→ landonorris 😰😰
→ mclaren yn, please don’t threaten our drivers
→ YourUserName hey, i’ll take them both out if they don’t end their affair
→ oscarpiastri and here i was thinking you would cut his brake lines so i could get on the podium instead
→ YourUserName sure, we can go with that
user11 can we take a moment to enjoy the fact that they’ve been back together for 4 months and he’s still letting her bully him
→ YourUserName i’m riding the guilt trip until the very end
→ oscarpiastri i love you
→ YourUserName i know
→ landonorris but not as much as he loves me!
→ YourUserName i know where you sleep
→ landonorris yeah, with your boyfriend!
→ oscarpiastri don’t tell the internet that!
danielricciardo lando used to look at me that way
→ YourUserName i think we should start a spurned wags group
→ danielricciardo i’ll bring the wine
→ YourUserName i’ll bring the lightning mcqueen crocs
→ liamlawson30 can i join?
oscarpiastri sweetheart, you know you’re the light of my life
→ YourUserName didn’t feel that way when you guided lando away from a puddle and let me put my foot right in it
→ oscarpiastri i gave you my socks!
→ YourUserName they were sweaty
→ oscarpiastri it’s all i had…
→ mclaren yn, please stop bullying him. we can hear him crying from his driver’s room
→ user12 no because the fact that the majority of mclaren admin’s online interactions are just begging yn to behave
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oscarpiastri just posted
liked by logansargeant, YourUserName and others
oscarpiastri when you say date night and she says I’m not putting pants on
2,329 comments
YourUserName thank you for sharing your pizza with me after i burnt mine <3
→ oscarpiastri i can’t wait to share more with you
landonorris did she hide in your neck at the scary parts
→ oscarpiastri no she fucking laughed at the way he was running
→ landonorris you cuddled into her neck at the scary parts, didn’t you
→ oscarpiastri i plead the fifth
→ YourUserName it’s okay, princess, you know i’ll always protect you
logansargeant no because they had their ‘date night’ 3 days ago and the paintings they did of each other are hanging in their bathroom, and when i tell you they were a shock to the system
→ user13 logan, show them to us, please
YourUserName it’s not my fault that it’s hard to keep pants on when you’re around
liked by oscarpiastri
→ mclaren we talked about this
→ landonorris my eyes!
→ user14 @ aussiegrit come get your kids
→ YourUserName don’t tag him in it. mark still thinks i’m nice
→ oscarpiastri no, he knows you’re a gremlin
arthur_leclerc not you trying to pretend that you are romantic when you asked me for all of those ideas
→ YourUserName oh really?
→ oscarpiastri i had a whole night planned and you decided you didn’t want to go out!
→ alex_albon no because you really had him stressing
→ georgerussell63 he was even messaging the grid group chat
→ danielricciardo he had a whole group of guys debating the best alternative to rose petals
→ YourUserName because i don’t like roses 🥹 oh, osc. it was perfect
→ oscarpiastri 🤍🤍
→ user15 anyone else finding this suspicious
charles_leclerc a date night to remember, i’m sure. and not for the lack of pants
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user1 rough night in the piastri house, he’s upset mom and wifey
arthur_leclerc welcome to the family, oscar. please don’t bring yn with you
→ YourUserName you’re just jealous that i didn’t want dinner with you
→ maxverstappen1 wait, i thought i was your favourite. why don’t you want dinner with me?
→ charles_leclerc you are welcome for dinner anytime, yn
→ oscarpiastri see, what you’ve done. now lestappen are fighting. you promised to keep your crushes to yourself
user2 i love how now that oscar is past his rookie year, his true personality of being a gremlin has come out
→ user3 now that shy oscar has gone we’re seeing just how well he pairs with yn
→ arthur_leclerc and i can guarantee the grid are missing shy oscar. i have had to put up with this since 2021
→ georgerussell63 i can confirm we do
→ logansargeant now you understand why i prefer to be quiet. if you don’t talk, they can’t bully you
→ georgerussell63 my name on yn’s phone is amelia georgehart
→ oscarpiastri we’ve been together for years and mine is peestri pants, count yourself lucky
→ YourUserName lando’s is just fucker.
→ landonorris the full stop included?
nicolepiastri i have some questions
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YourUserName just posted
liked by lilymhe, alexandrasaintmleux and others
YourUserName weekends away with you
1,012 comments
YourUserName thank you for a lovely weekend away from the madness. i could spend forever with you in our little bubble
→ danielricciardo oh wow so you’re both simps?
→ YourUserName look away! i have a reputation to maintain
→ oscarpiastri no you don’t. you luuuuurve me
landonorris i can’t believe you left me behind
charles_leclerc remove your head from that poor girl’s shirt. i raised you better than that
pierregasly someone convince kiks to do this with me. she refuses to go camping
→ francisca.cgomes because neither of us would survive sleeping on the ground
→ oscarpiastri neither would yn if not for the fact that we camped in the back garden
→ YourUserName why would i want to go somewhere without a functioning toilet!
logansargeant where is your shirt. nobody wants to see that
→ YourUserName i think you’ll find that i did
→ oscarpiastri she’s a big fan
mclaren please come back, we miss you
→ oscarpiastri yn says she still has another weekend before she has to return me
→ mclaren we were talking to yn
→ YourUserName miss you too, boo 🧡
→ landonorris why don’t you speak to me like that
→ YourUserName ‘cause you stole my osc
→ oscarpiastri no one could take me from you
user4 no because that last pic screams engagement photo and i don't know why
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charles_leclerc just posted
liked by arthur_leclerc, carlossainz55 and others
charles_leclerc i am an incredibly proud father right now
10,226 comments
oscarpiastri in other words, i convinced the prettiest girl in the world to marry me
→ YourUserName and now i have the prettiest husband in the world
user5 how is lando taking oscar looking at someone else that way?
→ landonorris not well
→ danielricciardo he cried the whole day
→ YourUserName that’s why i gave him my flowers
→ landonorris no i earnt those!
→ lilymhe yeah, i still have the bruises!
user6 miss rabbit has fainted
YourUserName i enjoyed our father-daughter dance
→ fernandoalo_official @ aussiegrit the monegasque is trying to steal our children
→ oscarpiastri now i’m in trouble with mark
→ YourUserName i’ll make it up to you on our honeymoon
→ oscarpiastri 😳☺️
user6 fuck you to all the bitches who said they wouldn’t last because they’ve never dated anyone else
mclaren what a beautiful couple. i think we need to put those up around MTC
→ YourUserName i think zak would really appreciate them in his office
→ oscarpiastri what makes you think i haven’t already put them up around MTC. gotta keep my wife with me wherever i go
→ YourUserName stop making me giggle
user7 definition of soulmates
arthur_leclerc welcome to the family, yn. even though i asked oscar to leave you behind when he was adopted
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YourUserName just posted
liked by oscarpiastri, landonorris and others
YourUserName i made something
10,229 comments
nicolepiastri and an amazing job you did, sweetheart
→ YourUserName i love you 💗
→ user8 nicer to mama piastri than she is to her own husband
oscarpiastri i helped
→ YourUserName you contributed for like 2 seconds
→ oscarpiastri stop being mean to me or i may fall in love with you
→ landonorris 2 second wonder
→ YourUserName you would know
charles_leclerc i’m too handsome to be a grandpapa
→ YourUserName certified gilf
→ oscarpiastri i cannot believe you made me read that. i thought you were better than this
→ YourUserName whoa, i have never been better than this and you know that but i can blame it on baby hormones this time
→ charles_leclerc and oscar will let you get away with it
→ oscarpiastri damn right. she just had my baby
landonorris does this mean i get the chance to win godfather of the year
→ danielricciardo don’t tell me they actually named you godfather. you can barely keep yourself alive
→ logansargeant yn got to pick me so oscar was given the choice to pick the other
→ oscarpiastri we made the decision together as loving parental unit
→ YourUserName the decision was made whilst i was high on gas and motherly love
→ oscarpiastri stop making it sound like i coerced you
→ YourUserName you had your top off! of course i was coerced. piastitties
→ mclaren yn, no
oscarpiastri sweetheart, i have loved you every day since we were 14 and being by your side these past 9 months, watching you go through such a monumental change, only proved that it was possible for me to love you even more. i can’t wait to see our family grow 💕
→ YourUserName i love you so much, oscie. from growing with you to growing our own mini us, i’d go through all the pain again for forever with you
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Hi, guys. If you have requested previously, I promise they're coming. I've just got them added to my list
Baby Fever Angst Series
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@barcelonaloverf1life @rlalliehayes @dullypully @softtina @callsignwidow @luvrrish @fall-bambi @evans-dejong @sadsierra2 @justdreamersdream @spookystitchery @dark-night-sky-99 @majusialikesfastcars @luckyladycreator2 @bborra @mrosales16 @reguluscrystals @tvdtw4ever @alwaysclassyeagle @gigicisneros @spanishcorndogs @thecubanator2 @goldenharrysworld @awritingtree @sbrn0905 @hc-dutch @mxdi0 @buckybarnessweetheart @ironmaiden1313 @dreamercrowd @yourbane @glow-ish @g-l-o-b-e-w-h-o-r-e @leclercsluvs @weekendlusting @urdad-hot @lemon-lav @rosecentury @peachiicherries
#baby fever angst#formula 1#f1#formula 1 smau#f1 smau#formula 1 social media au#f1 social media au#social media au imagine#formula 1 imagine#formula 1 headcanon#formula 1 drabble#formula 1 one shot#formula 1 fluff#formula 1 x reader#f1 imagine#f1 drabble#f1 headcanon#f1 one shot#f1 fluff#f1 x reader#oscar piastri#oscar piastri imagine#oscar piastri drabble#oscar piastri headcanon#oscar piastri one shot#oscar piastri fluff#oscar piastri smau#oscar piastri x reader#landoscar
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Ooh if you're taking requests, Can I request a Logan Howlett x reader smut?, Reader pranks Logan by telling him that she's on her period and that it will last 2 weeks, to which he actually believes her. However Logan eventually catches on to her lie and he goes absolutely feral by ripping her clothes off and punishing her while saying "You kept my pussy away from me, how dare you"
white lie | logan howlett
pairing: old man!logan x afab!reader
AN: ohmygodddd!! someone needs to restrain meee. i can see pussy starved!logan being super selfish when it comes to your cunt. practically abuses it—he does it just to spite you, for making him wait to taste you. chat i NEEED him.
content/tags: NSFW (18+), minors DNI. old man!logan, period comfort, porn with plot, p in v sex, spit as lube, pet names (sweetheart, doll, etc.) a little bit of mean!logan, missionary, doggy style, fingering, daddy kink, breeding kink, creampie
it's been a while since you started taking birth control, almost about a year or so. despite the name of the medication, you initially took the pill to fix your hormonal imbalances. at first, your periods were irregular, and extremely painful, and of course, logan would do anything to help alleviate the pain.
he wasn't really one for domesticity, but that’s something that you changed that about him.
how could he ever refuse to take care of a sweet little thing like you?
logan would pamper you, refuse for you to get out from bed whenever the week of your period came. you wanted a cup of water? don't move, he'll be right back with a glass. you didn't want it with ice? logan profusely apologies, and returns back to your side with lukewarm temperature water.
sure, these things seem menial, but seeing logan's brooding figure rush around the apartment, struggling to find your heating pad that you use for cramps; his brain scrambling over how it was safe to throw something like that in the microwave. it brought a smile to your face, and seeing you happy was the only thing he wanted.
and of course, you didn't mind the additional benefits that came with taking your medication.
the two of you fucked like rabbits. logan absolutely took advantage of the fact that you were on birth control; and though he didn’t admit it, it was clear he had some sort of breeding kink.
and it became apparent when you played a “prank” on him—a lighthearted joke that you made that he took the wrong way
“such a shitty day,” you groan, rubbing your eyes haphazardly. you unbutton your unbearably tight top, slouching into the worn down couch of your tiny apartment.
“what’s wrong, bub?” logan chirps, joining alongside you, his hands working at your thighs. “let me help you, doll.”
you sigh and lean your head further back into the cushions, feeling dizzy even at the slightest movement. “feels like i’m gonna start my period soon…”
his head tilts to the side, his hand now gripping at your legs instead of massaging them. “thought you’re still on it though,” he trails off, his eyebrows furrowing in confusion.
“shit, i forgot to tell you when my period was over,” you answer with genuine concern. “my periods are still irregular, thought you’d already know.”
‘fuck’ logan thought to himself, his hands moving upwards to play with the hem of your pencil skirt. you’re still in your office attire—tights, kitten heels, a lacy tank top hidden underneath your button up, the whole ordeal.
“should’ve told me sooner, sweetheart,” logan growls into your ear, hands roaming your body
and before you know it, you’re bent over the kitchen counter, stripped down to nothing but your skirt, ass up and on display for his viewing pleasure.
with the pop of his claws, he ruins your cute little skirt, ripping it off of your ass with ease, the ripped fabric discarded to the side.
he makes sure to not mess up your panties though, his rough hands pulling the soaked fabric down your legs. he pockets them, shoving them into one of the pockets of his leather jacket.
“naughty girl,” logan chuckles to himself, watching at how your hole twitched around nothing, cunt absolutely soaked with your own arousal. “don’t even ‘hafta get you ready…”
he slips his cock out from his jeans, the flushed head of his tip already leaking; he's been waiting for this, a week too long.
he pumps himself a couple times, smearing the precum over his tip with his thumb. before lining himself up against you, he makes sure to tease you—after all, you did make him wait.
logan harshly slaps his dick against your cunt, making you whimper out his name. "bet you're fuckin' mad at yourself, huh doll?" his voice low, "being so forgetful..."
the shame was too much, all you can do is whine in response. "starved not only me, but yourself of your old man's dick," he lets out a tsk, and without warning, sheathes himself in you.
"shit! logan, im sorry" you cry, feeling yourself clench around him, missing the way he stretched out your cunt.
“gonna stuff you with my cum, darlin’. and you’re taking fuckin’ all. of. it.�� he grunted out, emphasizing the last of his words with the deep thrust of his hips.
you could only respond with a feverish whine, “need you so bad, logan”, your fingernails clawing at his back to ground yourself as he pounds into you relentlessly.
“how fuckin’ dare you whine for my cock-,” he hisses out, warm breath tickling the shell of your ear, “you kept this tight little pussy away from me,” he spat out, his voice sounding bitter.
“can’t believe you made me wait for this, darlin’” he spat out with disdain, his thrusts getting sloppier. “you’re gonna have to beg for it.”
your bottom lip is swollen from your constant nibbling—which was considered a bad habit to logan, the tic stifling your moans which he gravely desired to hear.
his hand clenches at your jaw, parting your lips, your cheeks squished together. a small whimper escapes your lips at the action. he inches his face closer to you and his hazel eyes bore into yours.
“gonna stuff you so much, you’re not gonna ‘hafta worry about your period anymore, sweetheart,” he snarls out, his grip getting tighter.
your mind goes fuzzy, and the only thing you could think about is him finishing inside you, painting your velvety walls white.
you were whining at the top of your lungs, babbling incoherently. mouth agape, logan’s hand wrapped tightly around your neck, you can barely manage to let out any words. ‘s-sorry, i know i’ve been bad,’ m’sorry daddy… shouldn’t have lied…’
logan smirks at your moans, recognizing how much of a mess you are. content with your pleading, he releases the grip on your neck, his fingertips now tracing down your torso, making their way down to your hips.
“gonna breed this tight pussy,” he grunts, his rough hands gripping at your love handles, using them as leverage to pound into you deeper.
“she’s gonna keep all my cum in there, right doll?” he asks tantalizingly, his eyes locked onto your cunt, admiring the way your hole twitches perfectly around his dick, gripping him like a vice.
you can only moan in response, breath hitching with every deep thrust of his cock. it’s too much for you to handle, the pain you’re experiencing slowly turning into pleasure.
logan reluctantly slips out of you; manhandling you, he hastily flips you around. he spits directly onto your clit, and it’s a sinful sight—a thin strand saliva connecting from his bottom lip to your clit, and your pupils dilate at the view.
his fingers adeptly working at the swollen bundle of nerves, continuing his rhythmic thrusts—it’s all too much for you.
“feels s’good,” you cry out, your body a twitching mess beneath him. your fingernails dig at his shoulders, leaving crescent-shaped marks against his skin, and soon after, you’re chasing your own release.
your hips move against your own will, attempting to match his pace—but it’s no use. he brutally pistons his hips into yours, intoxicated by your cunt, greedily sucking him in, and how unwilling she was to let his cock go.
“be a good girl n’ take it, baby,” he hisses between gritted teeth, pumping himself a couple more times before he finishes. he lets out a primal growl as thick ropes of cum fill your insides, your gummy walls milking him dry.
he keeps himself sheathed inside of you, ensuring that you were stuffed full of his cum. “need to make sure she takes…” logan murmurs, his thumb lazily rubbing at your clit.
even as his cock resides deep in your cunt. the mixture of your arousal and his manages to slip out. “such a pretty little cunt,” he says in awe, “fuckin’ perfect.”
the schlick of him pulling his cock out filled the room, making you whine in need, already missing how well logan filled you.
before you knew it, he swept you up off your feet, moving you from the kitchen back to the living room couch, placing you down gently knowing how sore you must’ve been—from your period cramps and the onslaught he had on your cunt.
you’re still naked, body out on display for his viewing pleasure. logan hungrily watches as your cunt continues to ooze out with his cum, a smirk forming across his face showing that he’s content with the “work” he’s done.
“took my dick like a champ, kid,” he chuckles out, pressing a kiss to the temple of your head.
“next time, tell me when your period’s over, doll.” he adds, punctuating his words with a playful slap to your ass.
#logan howlett x reader#wolverine#logan howlett#wolverine x reader#deadpool and wolverine#logan howlett smut#deadpool 3#wolverine x you#drabble#wolverine smut#logan smut#old man logan#oldermen#old man!logan#logan wolverine#the wol#wolverine x oc#logan howlett imagine#logan howlett fanfiction
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sevika and her baby ✧.*
16+
plot: sevika stumbles upon a hidden gem inside the brothel. who is to deny her her fun after a long day?
tags: genderless, zaun au, fingering, cunnilingus, choking, ribbon tying, spanking, sevika x reader, fem bodied reader
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it's currently 10:04 pm, the brothel has been slow today for some odd reason. people whisper about a brawl that happened between silco's men and some barkeep, but i pay no mind. babette suddenly knocks on the wall to my room.
"y/n? there's a customer here for you." babette tells you, a sly hint of hesitancy in her tone. why was babette nervous? there was no time to be thinking these dumb questions, i had a client.
"thank you ma'am." i reply hastily. i jump out of bed, slipping on my fox mask, orange with hints of gold lacing along the edges. i tighten my black and gold corset, pulling the strings to cinch my waist. lastly i slip on my heels and i lie on the bed waiting.
after a few minutes, loud footsteps could be heard from across the hall. until they stopped at your room. a metallic hand pulls aside the curtain. my eyes go wide. it was the all known sevika, the woman that men scattered in the streets from. the most well known and powerful woman in all of zaun was now in your room, wanting your time.
"so.. what's your name doll?" sevika says, the words dripping from her tongue like pure honey. she strides towards me until shes stopped at the foot of my bed.
my mouth seems to go dry, my tongue being stuck in my mouth and suddenly i no longer know what to say. i have to admit, i was frightened of her and of all the stories ive heard.
"hm? cat's got your tongue? too bad.. wish i could hear your beautiful voice." sevika replies to herself, cupping my chin in her hand as she slips off my mask. she runs her fingers over my lips as a prompt. i slack my jaw and she easily slips her fingers into my mouth. i circle her thumb with my tongue, suckling slightly on it.
"jus' like that doll." she murmurs to me as she presses her thumb flat on my tongue, causing me to gag.
"such a pretty thing" she says to me as she moves over to the table of toys. "too bad you'll be ruined once im done with you." she tells me as one last warning. she grabs a set of ribbon ties and a blindfold.
my eyes flutter at the items she picks up. "y/n." i stammer out, "my name is y/n" i tell her as she moves back to the bed. i move into the middle of the bed as she kneels at the edge of it.
"such a pretty name for a pretty lass like you, yeah?" she tells me, my face going a pale pink. she suddenly pulls my wrist, spinning me around and onto my stomach. my face was now shoved into the pillow. i try to ask what shes doing, but it's to no avail.
she ties the ribbon around my wrists, binding my arms behind my back. suddnely she pulls my head up by my hair, a pained grunt escapes my lips. a silk blindfold is slipped over my eyes. the world goes dark.
metal clanking can be heard behind me, suddenly im spun around onto my back. god i wish i could see what she looks like, i start to imagine her body.. toned abs? c or d cup? what scars does she have? and suddenly i feel a little too damp in my underwear.
sevika moves closer to me, my lower half now balanced on her thighs. a ripping sound of fabric is heard as my underwear is shredded with her knife. "just trust me, okay?" she whispers into my ear before a moan is ripped from my throat.
her fingers pinch and rub at my clit as moans slip from my lips. everything seemed heightened due to the blindfold. i needed more- i needed her. i move my hips up closer to her, whimpering for more.
"so needy" she mumbles before giving a small slap to my clit. a strangled moan escapes my mouth.
suddenly all friction is moved away for a few minutes until i feel her hot mouth on my peppled nipple. i arch my back, up and into her mouth. small and soft grunts come from her mouth, only spurring me on. after a while of abuse to my breasts, a sharp stretching pain takes control of my body.
she easily plunged 2 of her thick, warm fingers into my dampness. i wince at the pain, but it quickly subsides as she starts rubbing my clit with her other hand. i go to say something, but im quickly cut off as she curls her fingers up and into just the right spot.
my vision goes white for a hot second until i feel her dragging her fingers in and out of me. every few seconds she curls her fingers inside of me.
"please- shit- sev!" i quickly moan out as i start to feel my orgasm approach. i start to grind my hips against her fingers, my thighs clamping around her waist.
"jus' a little more. almost there." she reassures me as she quickens her pace.
sharp and loud moans are drawn from my lips as i feel hot liquid drip down my core, i squirted all over her shirt and pants. a soft moan can be heard from her lips.
i groan at the loss of sensation as she pulls her fingers out, i can hear her licking my juices off her fingers. the dip at the edge of the bed suddenly dissapears as she gets up.
a damp and cold cloth strokes against my clit, sending a jolt down my spine. "easy, im jus' cleaning you up." she coos to me.
next thing i know the binds on my arms are coming undone, falling down at my sides. i pull them to my stomach as i rub the leftover marks where the ribbon was. i take off my blindfold to thank her for her service, but the curtain was already shut. she had disapeared like most of my usual customers. three silver and a bronze coin lay at my desk.
i wonder if i'll ever see her again.
thank you for reading if you got this far! this is my first post, not sure if ill do more. just depends on if people like my writing!
#sevika x reader#sevika#arcane#sevika smut#smut#wlw smut#wlw#wlw ns/fw#i love sevika#i need her so bad#i love women#pinning#ambessa x reader#arcane ambessa#arcane sevika#victor arcane#ambessa medarda#mel and ambessa#caitlyn#arcane league of legends
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☕💖 Can I Get Your Number? ☕💖 Ch 1
Jason Todd x Chubby! Reader (fem) A/N: I don't know what I'm doing here, I'm not even much of a DC fan, but Jason Todd has quickly become my latest hyper fixation character (Harley Quinn too, do I just have a thing for Joker victims???) so ... thank you for giving me a place to put this energy I guess! 😂 I'm not super confident on the characterizations, but I'm going with it because I like it. If it's wildly ooc ... that tracks, given that the only DC comic I've read is Batman: Wayne Family Adventures. Read it, or don't, I just needed to get the thoughts out of my head. The art doesn't belong to me, but the writing does. Please do not post elsewhere!
written with a female reader in mind, first person pov, no use of Y/N, starting out fluffy, will probably get NSFW later so minors DNI, let me know if there's anything else I should tag this with!
word count: 1.7k
Chapter Selection
In a city known for its masked fighters, you learn pretty quickly that everyone and everything is a potential threat. Every approaching stranger on the street, every loud sound behind you, every dark alleyway. Being bigger than me certainly isn't a prerequisite to being a danger, but it does have a way of setting off my mental alarms. I've found that big men are used to getting their way, and they get all sorts of bent out of shape if you deny them their wishes. Especially when they think they're doing you a favor.
It died down a bit after high school; I learned to exist in public with ‘fuck off’ stamped across my face. Headphones on, reading a book, intentionally seated at the table furthest from the other cafe patrons. All the typical signs of someone who wants to be left alone; nothing about me said ‘please come talk to me'. So I was understandably on edge when I noticed someone standing by the chair across from me. I look up just a bit, gesturing to the chair with a nod. Silent consent to take it back to his table and leave me to my book.
No such luck. The man simply smiled and mimed taking headphones off. Putting a bored look on my face, I moved one off my ear. “... Hm?”
“Hi! I'm sorry to bother you, but my brother thinks you're really beautiful and is refusing to come tell you himself.”
I could feel my expression turning to stone. “... What is this, middle school?”
His cheerful grin faltered ever so slightly; “hey, I know it's a bit silly, but he's awkward around cute girls, so what's a brother to do, ya know?”
I stared him down; “... You're not fooling anyone. Move on.”
“... Sorry, ‘fooling anyone’?”
“It’s not funny, it’s not even hurtful the 20th time, it's just annoying. Go. Away.” It was a lie; it was always painful to be on the receiving end of these pranks. But that was what these guys wanted, so I wasn't going to tell him that. My headphones back in place, the guy slunk away.
Ten minutes later, another person was standing by the chair. I pretended not to see him, continuing to read my book, until he plopped down in the seat. I looked up slowly and he smiled, another oddly warm smile, leaning forward on his elbows.
An incredibly put-out sigh later, I slid the headphones off one ear again. “What?”
“Hi, I'm Tim! I'm not sure what exactly my brother said to you, but I wanted to let you know - we're not trying to prank you or something. Our brother is just way too awkward with girls. It's painful to watch, really, so we figured we'd give him a hand.” He spoke much too fast for me to get a word in. I blinked a bit, raising an eyebrow.
“... You frat boys are really committing to the bit these days, huh?”
“Huh? No, really, I promise!”
My headphones were nearly back into place when a child showed up. His impatient expression matched how I felt about the whole situation. “As usual, Drake, your plans are far too convoluted to be effective. Watch and learn.”
He turned to me, nothing about his demeanor changing; “hello. Todd said we shouldn't bother you because you ‘clearly want to be alone’, but I am convinced the only way to stop their nonsense is if he comes over. May he have a moment of your time?”
Frowning a little, I stared at the kid. He stared right back, neither of us blinking for a solid minute as we sussed each other out. His expression barely changed, but the boredom in his eyes turned into determination. “... Well, you're definitely not a frat boy. So I'll make you a deal; you may report back that he has permission to come say hi. If he doesn't choose to, that's the end of this little charade. And if either of them” I gestured to the one sitting at my table; “comes back over here, I start stabbing. Got it?”
The boy nodded once, and I thought I saw a ghost of a smirk. “You have my word.” He dragged the other man out of the chair by his shirt, pulling him stumbling toward their table. That was when I saw him. The only person at their table who hadn't come over yet. Even hunched over the table he was enormous, probably close to six feet tall; exactly the kind of man I typically avoided. The kid spoke sharply, pointing in my direction, and his head shot up to look in my direction. Even from across the spacious patio, I could see his face turning red. The obnoxious, cocky smirk I was expecting to see was entirely missing; instead he seemed almost confused.
Headphones back on but turned off so I could hear if he approached, I returned to my book. But I only got through a few pages before the first one shouted; “and offer to get her another coffee or something!”
I looked over to see the tall one frozen halfway between our tables, a look on his face like he was considering jumping over the patio fence to get away. His demeanor reminded me of a lost puppy, and I couldn't help the chuckle that rose up out of my throat. I bookmarked my page, set the book aside, and slid my headphones down around my neck. I really thought he was about to bolt until I lifted one hand, curling my fingers to gesture for him to continue toward me.
He stopped short by a good several feet, eyeing the distance between himself and the chair, and took one extra step back. It seemed as if he was hyper aware of just how much he loomed over me; the way he stood was like he was trying to will himself to be smaller, and he kept his hands at his sides. “Um … hi. … Sorry, this is … this is really weird …”
I nodded, watching him. “It is a bit. … Todd, was it?”
“Jay… Jason.”
“Not Todd?”
“Jason Todd. Damian calls me Todd, he thinks using people's last names keeps them at an arm's length…” Jason Todd. The name felt familiar, but I couldn't place why. He continued to ramble about how important tone was in determining whether this Damian kid was referring to you with affection or disdain, and I watched him. He was admittedly very cute; he had a sort of a bad boy aesthetic -leather jacket, dark clothes, a white streak in his hair, some unusual scars on his face and arms-, which juxtaposed interestingly with the gentleness in his voice, bright eyes, and awkward mannerisms. That was actually the thing that made the most sense about this situation; bikers are often secret teddy bears.
“... Jason?”
He looked up at me, one hand sheepishly making its way into his hair. “Yeah, sorry, you want me to go. I'll get them to stop harassing you, so sorry-”
“Actually, I was going to say you don't have to stand the whole time.” I gestured to the chair across from me.
He hesitated, watching me. “... Y- you don't want me to go?”
I smiled softly and shook my head. “Sit?”
He quickly obeyed, a hesitant smile on his face, which was almost immediately hidden by his hand when his brothers whooped from their table. “... God, I'm so sorry … th- they mean well, really, they're not trying to be weird …”
I laughed softly, “it's fine, that's what siblings do, right?”
“... I guess so … I've been sort of … away for a while, but I guess this is pretty standard sibling behavior. … Right?”
“I mean, a little more insistent than mine, but not too far outside the realm of what I’d consider normal.” I shrugged, finishing my chai latte.
He smiled slightly, considering that. “... Hm … um … c- can I get you another?” He gestured to my cup.
“... Sure, I've got time.”
The pleased grin on his face as he looked away to flag down a server surprised me. Then again, everything about him was surprising. Still, no one had ever looked at me quite like that before…
The server sauntered over, clearly curious about my new companion. Jason smiled brightly; “Hi, can we get another for the lady? And I'll have a medium black coffee, sweet, please.”
Huh. He called me a ‘lady’. Not a girl, or a chick, a lady. That was … also surprising. We chatted for a little while, sipping our coffees, and tried to ignore his staring brothers. He was incredibly awkward, in a sweet, endearing way. I got the impression that he wasn't fully comfortable, but chalked it up to how weirdly this all started. After a while, the first one returned, a small grimace on his face.
I raised an eyebrow; “I'm pretty sure I told the little one that the next one of you to come over was getting stabbed.”
“I know, I know! I'm so sorry, but Jay, we gotta go. Bruce texted…”
That was when it clicked; why I knew the name Jason Todd. He was a Wayne … his death had dominated the news cycle for a week. His miraculous, frankly poorly explained, return was the story for at least two.
He looked, torn, between me and his brother. “Oh … um …”
The man I finally recognized as Dick Grayson leaned forward and fake-whispered, “the words you're looking for are ‘can I have your phone number'?”
Jason swatted him away, blushing bright red; “Seriously, Dick? … well, can I-”
His ears were turning red as I held my hand out for his phone. I added my contact info and, feeling unusually bold, I added ☕💖 after my name while Jason dropped a couple of bills on the table; I smiled a bit, realizing he was leaving enough to cover my first drink for me too. I passed his phone back, enjoying the look of wonder on his face when he checked the screen. The way he whispered my name, like a prayer meant only for god's ears, had my stomach doing backflips.
“thanks … I'll call you?”
“Sounds good. I'm a night owl, so not too early, yeah?”
He nodded eagerly. “Not too early, promise.”
Next ->
#fanfic#fanfiction#red hood x reader#jason todd x reader#dc fanfic#wayne family adventures#chubby reader#awkward reader#dick grayson being a good brother#fluff#no y/n#jason todd#jason todd is awkward and adorable#i love him so much#seriously it's not even funny#dc robin#batfam#batfamily#red hood#first person pov#Can I Get Your Number?
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jake pampering pregnant!reader - thought/drabble ver
jake is a people pleaser as a lover. he is willing to do anything for your happiness and your pretty smile to remain on your face. so the second he'd see your pained face as your child moves in your belly, his face would drop along with yours and would thinthrougly about how to help you. is it him/her again, ma ? or is it kicking his/her feet really bad today ? would be heard, as he wojld come closer to you, a hand on your back and one in your head as he leads you to the nearest surface you can lie on. as you can only groan in pain, his puppy eyes would widen hearing it. as you sit down, the one that was one in yours would leave it to go rub your stomach in circles. mama, can i do something ? he'd softly ask, which is always unanswered as the only thing that can make you feel better is for the baby to stop moving, meaning you can only wait. and it's what he would do. he'd always wait wiht you til the pain leaves, stroking your belly and hair if it's really bad. he would shhh softly or telling you soft words like you're so strong ma or it's gonna stop soon.
once the contractions are done, his smile reappears as his round eyes becomes crescent. is it done, ma' ? he would say. you can finally speak, the pain not overwhelming you anymore making jake the happiest. he would get up and get in between your legs. both of his hands would hold your round stomach like he would do with your cheeks, youre so mean to your ma [baby's name ] , she is feeding you and providing you a good place to grow hum ? hed fake threaten your near-to-be-born-child and kiss your belly in between his words to sooth you as well. he'd keep on going until he hears you giggle, finding the situation amusing. he feels like his husband/soon-to-be-father's duties is done, and he'd sit again next you, i am so lucky to be the father of your kids, y/n he'd seriously tell you. as much as i know about pregnancy i could never imagine how hard it is. i will forever be grateful and will never fail to remember the pain your holding for us., he'd then finish before planting his first kiss on your right cheek, the other being warmed with his hand. he would keep kissing your face, showing you his love and gratitude, and whisper sweet words again, but for you and you only like my sweet ma' or my pretty strong woman. he wouldn't let any inch of skin without his lips leaving a imaginary affection imprint on it, your nose, forehead, eyelids, cheeks, and lips all too precious to him. if you giggle, and go along with you, his warmth breath hitting your skin nicely.
jake as a husband -w kids jake as dad
jake w pregnant!reader- headcanon ver
princess love letter : thank you anon for your request ᵎ i will do a headcanon ver on how he is with pregnant! reader as well. i hope you will enjoy them both <3 thank you also for making me write my drabbles/thoughts it has been a while >.< please lemme kno what you think in inbox
perm tag list ( open ) : @berryyuni @stwrjvke @neos127 @goldenretrieverjakezgirlbaby @heeheeswifey @sjylouvre @txnwvc @oopshee @mioons @en-ner-jay @en-chantedtomeetyou @erenmymam @driedflowwr @jlheon @ghostiiess @river-demon-slayer @djikeu @firstclassjaylee e @nnaeul
#enhablr#jake fluf#sim jake fluff#enhypen jake fluff#fluff jake#jake fic#jake drabble#jake fanfic#jake soft thoughts#jake soft hours#jake x reader#jake headcanons#jake sim#enhypen jake#jake enhypen#enhypen drabbles#enhypen fluff#kpop fluff#kpop drabbles#kpop fanfic#jake fluff#jake sim x reader#jake sim x y/n#jake x y/n#jaeyun fluff#sim jaeyun fluff#sim jake#sim jaeyun
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Aletheia & Etterath
ChaCha Story Commissions.
Gahyeon x Male Reader ft. SuA
Tags: Romance, Lover’s Sex, Dreamcatcher, Gahyeon, SuA, Fluff, Melodrama
Wordcount: 11956
LAST PART OF THE SERIES
PART 1 - Aulasy & Kairoclerosis
PART 2 - Amour & Liaison
A/N: This is the last part of this series. Yey! I hope it's okay, I haven't written anything this technical before and I haven't written smut for more than a year. please do tell me how is it. It's not perfect but yeah.
Support me on KOFI
***
“Unnie, do you love me?” There’s just something that has always been both a blessing and a curse for me. People seem to think I am just a dumb pretty face who is unaware of anything around her—even my members always treat me like I'm a child.
However, the truth is, I know…
I observe and I always watch.
I know.
I just don't talk.
“Gahyeonie, of course, I love you.” She smiled caringly as she continued to wipe that iniquitous body of hers that I’m so jealous of—slender, sexy, toned, and petite so unlike my curvy voluptuous body. Well, despite my jealousy of her body and other things, I’m glad to have her, she loves me so genuinely like her own sister.
I love her too.
But I know…
She’s jealous of me too, and makes me so happy.
“Do you love him too?” She smiled again, but this time it was almost too bittersweetly. Bora-unnie opened her mouth and she didn't speak for a moment.
“Of course, I love him.” I know you. That was your true feelings, wasn't it?
“Every member loves him. He’s cute and he takes good care of you. There's no way we wouldn't love him.” That was true. She didn't lie, but it was far from her truth.
Nonetheless, I just tucked myself in the sheets and pretended to sleep. I just didn't know what to say to her or you so I held back. It wasn't before I felt her warm body beside me. It was Bora-unnie.
She's always been good to me. She always took good care of me. What's mine could have been hers, but she didn't take it. She gave you to me.
I always knew.
I saw it.
That spark in your eyes the first time you met her. Time must have slowed for you during those five seconds.
The way you listened intently to my stories, but you always had ears for things about her. You were always curious, but you never asked.
The way you glance over her reaction whenever they teased us of being lovers before.
The way she had always greeted you first. And was always there watching over us two.
You two always had an eye for each other.
It always felt like she wanted you.
And when you asked her about love.
When you said “I love you” to her.
I knew.
“Can’t fall asleep?” I heard Bora-unnie say. I thought it was for me, but then…
“Noona, what will happen from now on?” You answered her from my left side. I only noticed your presence then, maybe from all the thinking.
“I honestly don’t know,” Bora-unnie said as I felt her warm embrace engulf me, “she didn’t say it but I think she knows, but I’m too scared to ask.”
And I’m too scared to tell you two. Why didn’t I just wish the two of you to live happily? Why must you two hurt because of me?
“I’m happy and grateful for her tonight so I decided not to be greedy from now on. Tonight might happen again or not ever again but either way, I’m fine with it,” she continued as her hug tightened.
I’m the one who should be sorry for ruining something beautiful between the two of you. I’m sorry for being selfish, but I’m sorry because I don’t regret it.
“Whether she might decide to keep this sexual thing going or decide to acknowledge my feelings for you and let me share your relationship with the three of us or just bury it, I will not complain and do something.” I already did acknowledge it Bora-unnie, but the moment you surrendered him to me, that was when you already lost.
“After all, I already gave you up to her ever since that day, and it’s a decision I don’t wanna take back and regret,” she said lastly. The pain was apparent in her tone. Her hands that hugged me were shaking. You sighed, you were quiet, you were just listening, and I wish you had expressed your thoughts more, but as usual, you were reserved.
“So that’s it?” You said with a tone of acceptance and defeat.
“That’s it,” She agreed before breaking her hug and turning her back to drift to sleep.
I opened my eyes, only to be met by your sleeping face.
The face of the man that I love.
The man who I wish loved me as much I love him, but sadly I’m not confident.
What a player. It feels conflicting. I don’t plan on giving you up, but I’m not sure what these emotions are or what should I feel. You never cheated on me with her. You never did anything to compromise this relationship. You worked so hard to show your love for me, but whenever Bora-unnie is here, it always feels like you are chained to her, and she only pulls once, then you’ll leave me. I’m always at the mercy of her pity for me. Your words earlier still linger in my ear. I trust you and your words.
“I loved you but I love Gahyeon.”
“Thank you, but please wait for me… at least until I can make a decision”
That's what I said but then again,
I knew…
I would still choose you even if you don't.
And I wish,
You would choose me too.
The next day after that night was anticlimactic. It was awkward eating breakfast that morning. Everyone was quiet while eating the hotel room service food. It was a simple breakfast of toast, honey, butter, bacon, eggs, and coffee.
“This breakfast reminds me of Europe, we would eat this every day and I kinda missed the usual Korean breakfast after a while,” Gahyeon reminisced and you followed the conversation by asking about things about their tour while SuA stayed quiet, just listening to the two of you until breakfast was over. Gahyeon was weird today. She wasn’t doing that thing while she ate.
SuA excused herself, saying that she had an appointment and left you two alone.
“I’ll go now, Kids. Take care you two.” SuA said before she left. SuA looked rather down, she wasn’t being her usual mature and mischievous self. It felt like she had a problem she couldn’t share.
“Worried?” She asked you.
It became even more awkward when you and Gahyeon were left alone inside the room. No one dared to talk about what happened last night. It felt like there was a wall between the two of you and Gahyeon had a lump inside her throat that she couldn’t get out. She tried to smile but they were bittersweet. You wanted to say something to help her but there was nothing, as you were painfully aware of the fact that you were the reason.
“About what?” You answered back but you knew it was about SuA leaving so abruptly.
“I have no things to worry about.” You added as you smiled awkwardly.
Gahyeon stayed quiet after that and sat right beside you before locking hands with yours as she leaned onto your shoulders. She was clingy, refusing to let off your hand. It was comforting and reassuring, but it might be even a call for help from her.
“Do you wanna stay like this all day?” You opted to stay with her.
“No, I should visit my mom and dad. I haven’t seen them for so long,” She said and asked you to drive to her parent’s house. They haven’t seen her for so long you agreed.
The drive wasn’t any better. It was uncomfortably quiet with only the radio music filling the air. Thankfully, it played one Dreamcatcher’s song, and Gahyeon humming along with it made the atmosphere a little lighter. It was quite a long ride, but you survived.
Something was going on, and you were being kept in the dark. You knew it was about SuA. About what happened yesterday? It was not like you weren’t affected either. But you knew it was because of you, and you couldn’t do much.
“I love you,” you whispered before kissing her gently on the lips in front of her parents’ house. It was the only thing you thought you could do. A gentle kiss and the words she wanted to hear the most.
Gahyeon reciprocated with a peck of her own on your lips. She inched close, another on your cheek. Before whispering her reply to your words.
“I love you too.” This time the side of her lips raised as she was almost too drawn by the black hole in front of her. Three words and a kiss were the reassurance she deserved. She turned around happily to their house.
The night before, Gahyeon wished for you to express yourself more. Say that you wanted her as much as she wanted you. Reject Bora flatly, but instead, what she got was only you wondering and a last defeated line.
But this time, the saying of those three words and the kiss reassured Gahyeon of something. Something that made her feel less of a pitied woman and more of a chosen love.
Months have passed since then and it was like the hatchet was buried. The topic has never been talked about. Unsaid feelings and concerns were left unsaid, but you and Gahyeon continued to work on your relationship. It was like she didn’t have to bring it up, as you knew ever since that moment in front of her parent’s house—it was a testament to your feelings—it was all that was needed.
Today, there she was sitting on her chair. With that black dress’ fitting her, she would make every model in this world thankful that Gahyeon became an idol—it hugged her body tightly, proudly highlighting her gorgeous figure. Not just that, the French tips, the designer ring you gifted her, a scrunchy just in case, pink hair, and red lips, complete a date night look.
Gahyeon was a goddess.
Gahyeon no matter what she was wearing or even if she was wearing nothing at all, she would be the most beautiful girl in this world to you and many people. Today though, she was dressed extra special, just for you, and with that, you were thankful for being the one chosen by this goddess.
Gahyeon’s attention was all poured into the menu in front of her. She giggled as she looked at each page excitedly. Why wouldn’t she be excited? The meal was treated by you, and it was your second anniversary. You just stared at her, reminiscing all of the things that you two had gone through for the past year. From a rather peculiar deal after a one-night stand, a night for three naked bodies with the same girl you had a one-night stand with, and through all of that confusion and pain you had caused the girl in front of you, here you were celebrating this festive day.
“Don’t look at me like that, I’m gonna melt,” she teased as she closed the menu and gestured for the waiter to take her orders before looking back at you. Gahyeon smiled naughtily as if she had concocted something mischievous inside her head.
She inched closer until there was only a few centimeters between you and her lips which made you instinctively close your eyes.
For a kiss, but you just heard giggling before you—
“Ahh! What was that?” you asked as you opened your eyes only to find the love of your life back at her seat with the same smirk she had earlier. You just caressed your forehead, trying to ease the pain of her attack.
“You looked too cute, I had to tease you.” Her laughs echoed into your ears—a symphony you would never get tired of. Sadly, that soon came to a halt as the waiter came to take the food order. Of course, the order was hers to decide alone, you had given her the privilege to do so on this special occasion.
She opted for a specialty dish, a whole pizza, a side of roasted potatoes, an assorted seafood dish, and pints of beer to keep the cold night warm.
“Yah, that’s too much, we can’t possibly finish all of that,” You said to her to which she replied with a pout, “Aish, you’re not planning on making me finish all of that?”
“Of course! It’s the man of the relationship's job to finish all the food his woman ordered.” Gahyeon pointed out before handing the menu to the waiter. There she goes, a typical girlfriend moves to use gender roles to get what they want.
The food didn’t take too long to arrive. And it also didn’t take any for you two to enjoy the feast in front of you.
“Here try this,” Gahyeon offered you a spoonful of the specialty dish she ordered which you gladly accepted shyly before she herself tried it. Whether she was sweet or she wanted to see how it tasted first, her mixed expression said it was both.
“How was it?” She asked and you just nodded. Gahyeon never was the kind to hide her affection. She didn't even try to hide the relationship from the media. For a while it became a headache for her management, but with time and effort, it all became fine. Now it is an open fact that Gahyeon from Dreamcatcher is dating a non-showbiz man.
“It’s delicious!” Gahyeon blissfully exclaimed after she took a bite. You smiled unknowingly while watching her—it looked like it was worth it to book this restaurant months earlier for this date. She was happy—the way she hummed as she ate was a testament to this.
“Don’t stuff yourself too much or you’ll end up complaining to me later that you gained weight,” you teased her as you too stuffed yourself with the delicious food. She glared at you—never mention gaining weight with someone who controls theirs for their job. An idol needs to always stay in shape after all—their almost impossible-like figures.
“I’m sorry.”
Time passed like that. You two passed bicker on to each other. Talking about all the mundane things. Just there, enjoying the company of each other.
The night has been perfect so far. The cold breeze was countered by the alcohol, delicious food alongside great conservation, and the reincarnation of beauty and kindness, your date Gahyeon has been nothing but lovely(also a teasing master), there was no reason to be unhappy.
“I said to stop staring at me like that.” She looked at you sourly, pretending to be annoyed at you.
“I wasn’t, I wasn’t looking at you!” you retorted at her. “I was looking at that last piece of pizza.”
You took it, bit on it, and she looked like hell rose and her soul left her body.
“But, I was gonna take that last piece,” she dejectedly said as she pouted at you.
“Yah! You, we’re breaking up! You stole my pizza.” Gahyeon pointed her fork at you, threatening you with it.
“Come on now, fox, I’m sorry. Here take the piece.” You placed the pizza on her, but she just glared at you.
“But, you already took a bite!” She moved the piece back to your plate but you refused and placed it again on her plate.
“No! This is betrayal! Did you know wars started because of pizza!” Whelp, that was clearly an overreaction. Or maybe not, you made a mental note to search later which historical event she might be referring to.
For the second time, she returned the pizza. And by then you had already noticed other guests from the tables near you looking. Not that it was embarrassing you, but being a cause of distraction to other people was bad.
“Babe, I’m really sorry,” You apologized sincerely. “Look, we can order another pizza if you still want them. We can also take them as a takeout for later.”
“The next time, I promise I’ll ask you, if you want the food before I eat it, okay?” You held out your pinky, and she raised just her eyebrow and crossed her arms as you wiggled the finger in front of her.
“Hmm, k. You better order the same one!” Gahyeon hooked her finger onto yours and stood up. It all happened too fast and before you even knew it, her lips connected to yours, not caring if it was a public display of affection or if she could be photographed by a random fan.
You two had done it more than times you could ever count, but it was still as magical—her soft supple lips landing on yours, staining it with her red lipstick.
“Be ready, I think you’ll be on Dispatch tomorrow,” Gahyeon smirked as she disconnected her finger from yours and snatched the piece of pizza on your plate before she sat again and ate it. You will definitely be on Dispatch tomorrow after that, but this time, it won’t be a controversy but it is to report about Gahyeon’s successful relationship.
As for you, you shyly sat there—red as an apple after that scene straight out of a KDrama.
You shyly gestured for the waiter.
“Can we get the check and then a pizza for takeout,” you said to the waiter as Gahyeon continued to enjoy herself, taking pictures as she ate her food. You took out your phone to capture some photos.
It was such a mundane thing, but it was so beautiful. Her just being there, eating the food you treated her comfortably without any care in the world.
The way she smiles.
The way she munches her food.
It was love when even the most boring things became the most interesting.
There was no worry in this world with you and her in it. It was proving how fruitful your efforts were in this relationship.
You love her and that is all that matters. You wouldn't trade her for anything or anyone. That was what you decided ever since that day.
Soon the waiter came with a box of pizza and the check for the food. You paid for everything and got ready to leave. The night was still young, there were so many things to do, and there was only so much you could do.
Not much time after, Gahyeon found herself walking alongside the beach, and you followed her from behind. The air was cold to feel, the song of the ocean resonated to the ear, her footsteps left prints on the sand beneath, and her dress flew and formed waves like the ocean’s.
It was a sight to behold.
There was just a certain kind of beauty as the moon just shone on her like it was a spotlight, her porcelain skin glowed as if it was reflecting the moon like the water does. The focus was all just for her and everything, even the breathtaking view just became a backdrop to her beauty. It was a picturesque sight that would forever be imprinted on one’s brain.
However, it wasn’t anything special. Rather it was just Gahyeon and your eyes. The eyes that allowed you to see her for who she was. It wasn’t because of her beauty, or her personality, it was Gahyeon as a whole.
What people don’t really understand was that attraction and love are two different things.
Seeing someone and wanting them is attraction.
Seeing someone and wishing to be with them is love.
Of course, attraction is normal among lovers, but there is a fine line between lust, infatuation, and love. To which is what is underneath all that attraction. The normality and comfort of just being in her presence. Gahyeon isn’t the goddess or the idol of everyone. The difference between your love and the love of her fans is that you don’t look up in the sky for her—seeing her in glasses of such absurdity and obscurity.
Gahyeon is there.
She’s always been there up ahead. She’s not up there on a pedestal.
She’s there with you.
And that’s what you call Love.
And that’s when you truly see. It was not the glow of her skin under the moonlight, or the way her pink hair and black dress swayed to the blow of the sea breeze, or the way that sight was like a masterpiece waiting to be captured and kept in an art museum.
It was again only Gahyeon. Gahyeon who was just walking alongside the beach. Gahyeon, who was stuffed with all of the food she ate. Gahyeon, who probably was feeling cold, because one, she wore sleeveless, two she didn’t bring any jacket even though you told her to do so earlier, and three, because it was simply cold during that night.
Gahyeon makes you worry. Gahyeon makes you feel unease. Gahyeon makes you hurt. Gahyeon makes you wanna care. Gahyeon makes you feel alive. Gahyeon makes you cry. Gahyeon makes you laugh.
Gahyeon is Gahyeon.
She took out her phone, pointed it onto the horizon, and soon you felt a vibration inside your pocket.
“The moon looks so beautiful isn't it?” Her message said alongside the picture of the horizon as if you weren't there with her. You smiled as you typed the reply.
“Come on, why are you acting like I’m not even here,” you said as you approached her and nudged her. She giggled and looked at your face for a second before she went back to staring at the horizon. You dropped the pizza that you ordered as takeout at the sand, took off your jacket, and shielded Gahyeon from having a cold later tonight.
“I knew you’d do that. That’s why I didn't bring a jacket. It is a boyfriend thing to do,” she commented and you just giggled in response.
“The moon looks so blue.” There it was up above the skies, shining alone brightly. It must have been lonely. There were no stars above and even if there were, no matter how it seemed like they were close to each other, they were truly drifting away from each other. It was scary.
She held your hand. Tightly as if she was scared you would just disappear through thin air. It was sweaty and cold, but she didn't mind.
“I prefer the red sunset.”
Yes, that red sunset back when we were just teenagers without any care in the world, chasing our dreams, and then and there I knew I only had one dream.
And it was to be with you.
It was funny because I was making fun of how frail you were, and how you wouldn’t be able to run a mile. You wouldn’t be able to reach the beach at the end of the town. Your house was on the other end of the town after all.
But you did, and the first thing you did was send me a photo of that beautiful red sunset.
t was so beautiful.
It made me happy.
You were amazing and it was beautiful.
I could imagine how you were frowning when I replied and said how pretty it was.
I mean, you sent it to me to show how amazing you were right?
It made me so happy so I took my bike and pedaled all the way to you.
You were so funny. I caught you complaining.
“Not that! I want her to know how awesome it is that I ran here!” You exclaimed.
“Oh, you didn’t want to show me the sunset?” You didn’t even notice that I was behind you.
“That’s right… not the sunset…” That was when you realized, and looked back before jumping out of shock.
“Gah, what are you doing here?” You asked me.
“Talking to you last time made me want to see the sunset.” That is what I answered, but the truth is…
I wanted to see you. I even brought you a bottle of water. You drank as we sat on the sand.
“I’m so happy,”—I expressed— “you ran all the way here to send me a picture of that beautiful sunset.”
“It’s not like that…” you denied but you were blushing. You continued mumbling, trying to come up with an excuse. You were so cute, you didn’t know what to do and you couldn’t even understand what you were feeling.
I called out your name. You were so rattled.
“It’s so red, isn’t it?”
“Red? Am I blushing?”
But I just said…
“It’s a beautiful red sunset. So pretty…”
“The sunset? It sure is. It’s red, isn’t it.”
“Well, it’s not as red as you.” I couldn’t really help but tease you. Your reactions were so cute.
But really… I was so glad.
I could watch that beautiful sunset with you.
Those were the days.
That was also the day, I realized… It wasn’t a crush.
I love you.
“Red sunset?” Your question brought back Gahyeon from her trance.
“Yes, I wanna see it again,” Gahyeon said as she continued to watch to the horizon while you watched her.
“Is this that beautiful?” You asked her.
“Yes, it was so beautiful,” Gahyeon answered. She turned to look at you and locked eyes.
“Yes, beautiful.” She giggled.
“Take me to the beach again soon,” Gahyeon asked full of expectations.
“Why?” You asked but you already made a mental note to plan another beach trip. Maybe this time back in yours and Gahyeon’s hometown. You remember visiting alone the last time you drove her to see her parents, and it was beautiful. Maybe you two could eat some crabs and other seafood.
Gahyeon loves seafood a lot after all.
“I wanna see a nice red sunset again. Also, I really want to catch some crabs.” Gahyeon said and rubbed her stomach. Is she a mind reader? Or was she just thinking about using her stomach? Either way, it made you laugh a little. You expected her to say something about food.
“Then, we should go earlier than today so that we catch some crabs while we wait for the sun to set.” It’s been decided. You don’t when, but you knew it was gonna happen, maybe when Gahyeon’s schedule loosened up again.
“I wonder how many I can catch.” She said after you ruffled her pink hair. Gahyeon retaliated, trying hard for you not to ruin her hair that she had so much time to perfect just for your anniversary date. When she finally was able to stop you, she glared at you and pouted cutely.
“You won’t be able to and you’ll make me catch them instead.” You just laughed as you tried to fix her again. You know her too much. Gahyeon would say that it’s a boyfriend thing to do to catch crabs for her girlfriend and cook them—she would leverage her girlfriend card again.
“That’s rude, I can do it too.” She slapped your hand and fixed her hair herself. Of course, her slap didn’t use too much force. Gahyeon is sulky girlfriend but she doesn’t want to cause you harm.
“I didn’t say, you can’t. I’m saying you’ll be too scared to do so.” She threw punches. Again they were not hurtful, but she was throwing a real tantrum and if you don’t calm her, she will sulk for the rest of the date.
“Come, sit here.” You held her hand and pulled her to sit on the sand near where you put down the takeout food from earlier.
“Open the pizza. I’m hungry.” She ordered to which to gladly followed. As soon as the box revealed the food, her eyes widened. Gahyeon, who was almost drooling turned her mood upside down because of the luscious pizza in front of her. She couldn’t restrain herself, as she excitedly hummed before she went for a piece and ate it.
“You’ll get fat,” You commented and she nudged you while her mouth was still stuffed.
“You’ll exercise with me, don’t worry,” Gahyeon retorted and you just laughed as you too took a piece.
The box of pizza was emptied as the night went on. Conservation under the moon went by faster than normal and that’s okay. As long as it was with her, time spent was time spent well.
Soon she decided that the cold ocean breeze was not doing it for her anymore and opted you two to leave the beach. Hand-in-hand you two went back to your accommodation for the night—a hotel near the beach and the restaurant.
The hotel room was nice. It wasn’t anything special like what most fans would thought idols were always staying in. It was a small suite with a single bed, kitchen, bath, and a balcony that overlooks the ocean. It was nice and not over the top. Gahyeon loved it. As soon as she entered the room, flopped and bounced on the bed, playing as if she still had so much energy to burn.
“Come on, our anniversary night is still not over!” Gahyeon had her arms open wide, tempting you to jump on her arms. It wasn’t an offer anyone could refuse. A woman as cute and attractive as she flopped her arms open wide on top of a fortress of pillows and mattress, there was no way you would pass on that.
It was a long night that you wish wouldn’t end.
You didn’t waste any more time to accept her offer as soon you were engulfed by her arms. You were on top of her, pressing onto her as she caressed the back of your head. Gahyeon smelled nice. Gahyeon always smells nice. Her smell made you feel relaxed, and her hug was comfortable. She gently ghosted her hand back and forth of your hair as she hummed your favorite song.
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It felt like a baby being held and hummed to sleep. It felt like heaven. It felt like home. It felt like the right place. And that place was inside her nestling hug. Gahyeon cuddled you, and you nestled back. Her voice was angelic. It was a known fact, but hearing her voice almost whispering the melodies of love, was the greatest fan service only available to you.
Your phone vibrated a few times, but you ignored it as you focused only on her and her alone. Relish the moment while it lasts. Take advantage of each second before it passes. For God JiU’s sake, it was your anniversary and nothing is more important than Gahyeon and you—it was probably just some work problem needing of solution anyway, they could at least handle it for one night.
Before you even knew it, Gahyeon finished her song.
“Thank you for putting up with me.” She whispered.
“Why wouldn’t I? I’m your boyfriend.” You answered back.
“Do you lo—”
“I love you,” you cut her before she could the question to allow her to hear the words. However, she didn’t do so after all.
“I love you too,” Gahyeon whispered before she pushed you off her and got off the bed with a mischievous smile.
“You’ll suffocate and squish me if we stay this way for long,”—Gahyeon pointed at you—“Special cuddling fanservice session is finished.”
This time you were the one to pout at her.
“No fair, I wanna cuddle more,” You complained.
“Take care of that constant vibration on your phone first while I take quick shower.” Gahyeon winked, “We’ll do something special when you come back.”
In the blink of an eye, Gahyeon disappears to the bathroom after insinuating something naughty for later. You were left in a daze for a few seconds, imagining what she meant by her words. You were only able to break the trance after a vibration.
You finally opened your phone only to be shocked by what was on the screen which made your smile turned upside down.
You quickly went down to the hotel lobby, where the message on your phone led you to find her.
“I just came back from a long hiatus and you’ll greet me with that face?” She pointed out your conflicted expression.
“Noona… why are you here?” She approached for a hug, but you were quick to step back and draw a line between the two of you.
It was SuA who you didn’t hear so much after months of cutting the connection from all of you—or at least from you. You were reluctant to talk to her.
“Why are you giving me the cold shoulders?” SuA teased as she once again approached step-by-step and you backed down for each step she took.
“Noona, stop this… what are you doing.” But she didn’t listen and forcefully tried to take your hand. Of course, you had more strength than her but being forceful to someone you cared about was hard.
“I’m taking you with me,” SuA declared as she tried to pull you, but you just didn’t let her as she pleased.
“Noona, I’m not going with you. Where? Where were you even? Where are you trying to take me?!” You lashed out at her. Thankfully, no one was around to see the scene. The older one just stared at you annoyed that you didn’t listen to her.
That standoff took a few seconds before you turned your back to walk away. You were finished with her. You were not doing this. Atleast, not on your anniversary night. You were not going to get swayed by her.
“Didn’t you say that you love me?”—her words stopped your steps—“Prove it to me now, ran away with me.”
Turn back. Look at her. Hear her cries.
“I love you.” Beads of tears slowly fell down her gorgeous face.
“Please, say it.
I wanna hear it again.
Say that you love me.
Choose me.”
It was painful, watching her cry fully knowing that you were the reason.
“I love Gahyeon.” Three words. One sentence. One name that wasn’t her.
It was short but meaningful. You didn’t regret. You were straight. You didn’t apologize for either hurting her or not choosing her. You said it. And that broke SuA.
“I shouldn’t have let you go.” Those were the words that escaped SuA's mouth as she realized it was too late and where it all went wrong for her—where she lost. You helped her. She looked so frail. What did she even do all this time?
“Noona…” SuA wiped her tears and quickly composed herself.
“Don’t worry about me. I’ll be fine.” SuA faked a smile and you returned it to her with a caring one.
“I’ll be off your back, don’t worry,” SuA said as she tried to walk away. You stopped her. You held her hand, but just like what you did earlier.
“Where are you going?” You asked her worriedly.
“Don’t worry, I already told Minji-yah that I’ll be coming back. I ain’t going nowhere,” She explained as she walked away.
“Let’s catch up soon.”
She looked back.
She smiled bittersweetly.
“Tell me, when did you realize that you love her?” Those were her last words before she walked away and left you speechless. However, maybe it wasn’t really what she wanted to ask, but rather the words were…
“When did you realize you didn’t really love me?”
It didn’t take long before SuA was no longer in sight. And her words are still stuck in your head. When? When did you really realize it?
Take out your phone. Stare at the picture of the woman on your wallpaper, Gahyeon.
When did I realize I love you?
That’s a really funny question.
But really.
It was maybe sometime after we officially started dating.
Honestly, I wasn’t sure yet. I knew I loved Bora-unnie or so I thought I loved her. I wasn’t sure. I was confused at that time. But I did my best to make you happy.
To try to make it with you.
I said I love you. We kissed already. We even had sex already at that time. I’m cruel aren’t I? I’ll probably go to hell for being a liar.
I knew I didn't love you yet. I felt disgusted with myself. You were like a sister to me after all. And I was lying and taking advantage of your feelings for me.
But…
Love is a Lie.
I said and I knew it was a lie.
But I wished, for one day… I’ll be able to truly tell you without any lies. To be able to kiss you out of love. To be able to be one with you. To want you as much as you wanted me.
To love you more than you love me.
One day…
It happened.
It wasn’t like I expected it to be.
It was a normal day. It wasn’t anything special.
I just woke up and that was when I realized…
I love you, Gahyeon.
When I saw your face the moment I opened my eyes. You were far from your beautiful self in front of the camera. You were ugly. Your hair was like a broom. You were snoring. Your breath stinks. You were eating your hair and you had dried drool on the sides of your lips.
You were ugly, Gahyeon.
It made me laugh. Although, I wasn’t any better. I was just fortunate enough to wake up earlier than you. I had time to fix myself before I got called ugly by you.
But I didn't…
I went for the kiss on your drool-painted lips. Mine wasn’t any different.
But this time it was different.
I kissed you because I love you.
I love you.
Not anyone else.
How could I be so blind when you were here all along?
I kissed you again and it felt so right.
But I accidentally woke you up.
You were smiling. That was the brightest smile I've ever seen in my life. You giggled as the sun funneling through the window illuminated you.
“Your breath stinks,” you teased.
“Please, brush your teeth then come back and kiss me,” you added.
It was funny. Yours stinks too! I didn't mind it at all, and I bet you didn't mind mine too.
That morning was a drop of dew. And I just watched you with love. The way you walked around with your disheveled hair and just my shirt on. You didn't care at all. Why would you? It's just me, the man you love.
You were so lazy that I had to brush your teeth and tie up your hair. If only your fans could see you, I wonder how they would react?
You're a slowpoke, Gahyeon. I couldn't blame you though, with a schedule as busy as yours. I would use any free time to laze around.
“When will breakfast be ready?!” You exclaimed from the bathroom while I was in the kitchen. You always cared about food.
“In a few minutes, take your time with your routine!” You were sleepy and lazy but you were always so diligent. You never skip on anything. You always took care of yourself. Although, most of the time, I still had to take care of you.
Maybe, that's my job.
“Gah! Breakfast is ready!” When breakfast was finally ready, you sprinted to the dining table. You were suddenly but then became sheepish. You took most bites with your eyes closed.
From then I took a mental note to prepare something that would help you sleep better every night before bed.
You took each bite excitedly but still sheepishly. You hummed as you ate. You always hum when you eat. It has always been an indicator that you were eating something delicious.
“This sucks. Do you want to take cooking lessons?” That was what you right after when you literally handed your plate for a second serving.
I gladly gave it to you. Do you remember?
That morning was so bright, comfortable, and was fleeting. Before I knew it, you were going to leave for practice and I was going to work.
However, I wasn’t sad because we were parting for the day, rather, I was already expecting the bliss that I would have when I finally met in the night.
It was such a peculiar thing, but I knew right then and there when I saw your back passing through my apartment door…
I love you.
“I should go back to Gahyeon,” You muttered to yourself as you made your way back to your hotel room, but unbeknownst to you, you would find an empty room. You wondered where she was. Did she meet SuA? Or did she somewhere else?
You were worried. You tried to text her and also tried to ask the hotel staff if they saw a pink-haired girl roaming. You might have taken too long because of SuA and she went out to look for you.
That was when you received a reply from Gahyeon.
“Wait for me.” That was what her text message said.
Where were you Gahyeon?
“Unnie,” Gahyeon called who was waiting at the other end of the hallway for SuA. The older stopped and looked at the younger. Did she he—
“I saw and heard everything.” For the first Gahyeon admitted that she was there or that she was listening. She always kept to herself and was always patient whenever something like this happened, but tonight Gahyeon decided differently.
“Not gonna welcome your unnie back? I just came back from a long hiatus,” SuA commented as they faced each other. Two women, who love the same men, but while the other succeeds, the other fails.
“Well, I would be happy to welcome you with a hug and a kiss but you just tried to steal my boyfriend,” Gahyeon answered with an annoyed tone.
“I didn’t try to steal him,” SuA corrected as she approached Gahyeon step-by-step. The younger stepped backward every time the older closed in up until she couldn’t, hitting the wall behind her. SuA was so closed, uncomfortably closed for Gahyeon, but she didn’t backed down.
“He’s mine to begin with,”—No one dared to break eye contact—“He loves m—”
“He loved you, Bora,” Gahyeon cut. She said so sternly and clearly, even opting not to use any honorifics. SuA bit her lip in response to what Gahyeon said. She knew deep down it was true. She just couldn’t accept it.
“He loved you,”—Gahyeon reiterated before SuA could even retort—“What? Cat’s got your tongue? It’s true is it not?”
Gahyeon had put SuA in her place or rather, she had put her back in her place. It was harsh, but SuA was reckless. She came out of nowhere and tried to hijack their anniversary night. It was almost as if SuA went there and just hoped for the best and trusted the little hope she had. Gahyeon, on the other hand, didn’t think twice to defend her place.
“I shouldn’t have pitied y—” SuA said before biting her lip as she instantly regretted what she had said, but it was too late. Gahyeon after hearing what SuA said, had a hammer punched in her stomach. She wasn’t expecting SuA to at least not say those words. Or at least for SuA not to feel that way. Gahyeon knew her and you happened partly because SuA felt bad about her, but for it to be said in her face…
Something inside of them broke, and a bottomless pit sunk inside of their hearts.
“I don’t know you anymore.” Gahyeon pushed her, and SuA fell to the ground. She didn’t mean to push her down to the ground, just enough to put distance between the two of them. Her heart ached. Gahyeon was worried as she looked down on her as the older looked away in shame.
“Please don’t call me or him. I don’t care about our jobs. Please, I’ll find a way. Just leave.” Gahyeon walked away and SuA could only watch her as tears once again flowed out of her eyes. She knew she had not only lost you, but now she lost Gahyeon.
Gahyeon wasn’t any better, she cried and wept as she took heavy steps fully knowing she had just cut off one of the most important people in her life. They both didn’t want for things to end up like this, but emotions cascaded like a waterfall and there was no way of stopping this. There was no way it could have ended with all parties happy—it was simply impossible.
Love takes.
Love is painful.
Love comes with a price.
Gahyeon clearly remembered. She didn’t want things to end up this way. She tried. A scenario where no one was hurt, but in the end… all of you ended up hurting. It was foolish to hope. Gahyeon wiped her tears and found somewhere to sit. She closed her eyes.
“Gahyeonie, wake up.” I opened my eyes and my eyes met with daggers of light before I saw her—the face of the person I was most jealous of. SuA, who was asleep beside me. SuA who made love with me and my boyfriend.
“Swa, good morning,” I greeted, still half-asleep.
“Good morning, Baby.” She caressed my face. Her eyes… They looked so sad. She looked like she was in pain, but she smiled.
“What's wrong, Unnie? I asked worriedly. Although, once again I knew… I knew but I couldn't do anything. Or I wouldn't do anything. I would die if I were to give back what she gave me.
‘Gahyeonie, do you love him?” SuA said, almost choking on her words.
“Yes, I love him so much. I have loved him for so long.” Those were my words. Those were also the words that drove you like this.
I'm sorry for being selfish.
“Unnie, do you love him?” I asked her once again. The same question from the night before.
“I do,” She confessed, and tears started to flow down her cheeks, staining her pretty face. She confessed… it came straight from her mouth. Her true feelings.
“But I love you more.” Those words… I didn't even know how to react. It was so sincere.
I wiped her tears, but I was crying too. Everything was a mess, and honestly, I was surprised how you slept through all of it.
When you woke up, it was as if nothing happened. We had a pleasant breakfast but the atmosphere was so awkward.
But I didn't expect it. That was the last I would see SuA for a long time. She just left. If I knew I would have hugged her. But I only found out later on from JiU-unnie that she left the country and went on a sudden hiatus.
If I knew…
I should have known at that moment.
It was goodbye.
That is until now.
Gahyeon opened her eyes. She had calmed down. She stopped crying. She knew she had to return to your suite. You were waiting for her, but she knew you would notice her puffy eyes.
That she cried a lot.
“So much for an anniversary night,” Gahyeon muttered as she stood up to head to a comfort room before going back to the suite where you were waiting.
Soon, Gahyeon stood in front of the door. Nervous about how she would explain what happened or how to open up about the topic or how to even talk about it. She wasn't ready, but she knew you would ask.
“Please, don’t ask.” She grabbed the doorknob and turned it. As the door swung, she found you, and couldn’t help but smile as she found you pacing back and forth, worried about her.
“Gahyeon!” You exclaimed. You saw her and ran up to her—finally relieved that Gahyeon had come back.
Before she could even react, she was engulfed by your arms in a bear hug. Her arms enveloped back as yours tightened. Hearts were booming. You could feel it, she could feel it, every fast-paced beat booming as your hearts connected.
Gahyeon had let go. She just let it happen. She didn’t speak, she just nestled into the comfort and protection of your hug. It was her home. It was warm yet something cold on your chest countered it. It was your shirt wetted by the diamonds dripping down her beautiful face. You caressed her back, trying to lull the crying girl as Gahyeon buried her face against your chest.
“It’s okay.” Gahyeon clenched her teeth and fists, took a handful of the backside of your shirt, and bit on the fabric her mouth was able to reach. She just kept crying without uttering a word. She just released what she was holding back inside of her.
It broke your heart seeing her like this. You couldn’t do anything but caress her back and hope that it was enough to ease her pain. Several minutes passed and she wasn’t calming down. You kissed her forehead and she looked up to you.
“Do you love me?” Gahyeon asked, her eyes pleading for reassurance as they continuously stained her face with tears. You kissed her once again, but this time it wasn’t your lips and her forehead, it was her lips and yours colliding softly for a peck. She smiled brightly. You haven’t even said the words she wanted to hear, but her eyes already lit up as if she knew it was coming.
“I love you.” The words were finally uttered and it was all that was needed for Ghayeon to wrap her arms around your neck. Pull in. Let go. Hug it. Before you even knew it, your lips collided with hers once again. Close your eyes. She captured your lips and pulled you into a longing hungry kiss. Knots were tied, and two soft marshmallow muscles clashed, moving with the rhythm of her hunger.
She was a blackhole longing for love. It was scary how a woman in pain like her craved love like this. It wasn’t a sweep inside your mouth as she playfully tickled the underside of your tongue while exploring the depths only she could reach.
Gahyeon pulled out, caught her breath, and chased once again as she lured you. She started sucking on your tongue, and you gladly let her without any resistance. She pulled and sucked. She circled her tongue around yours.
Seconds passed by and the endless exchange between lips didn’t end. Seconds became minutes, and tears already stopped flowing, but the fervent kiss didn’t end there. It started with a peck and it ended up in a torrid kiss. Eyes closed and lips glued to each other. Her arms traveled around your neck while yours gently caressed her hair.
She pulled out and a string of saliva bridged the two of you. Her eyes still brimming with hunger as yours locked with her lovingly. She wanted more and you would gladly give anything for her.
“Do you love me?” Gahyeon asked once again. This time you were the one to capture her lips and Gahyeon couldn’t help but smile while her lips were still connected to yours. Glide from her back to her lower hips as Gahyeon cupped your cheeks as she continued devouring you.
In one swoop motion, you lifted her off the ground, resulting in a momentary disconnection between the two of you. That didn’t matter though as she was quick to clash lips once again while you tried to excruciatingly navigate around the suite to get into the bedroom almost blindly.
You had hit several corners. Topped down appliances and broke a few glasses before you found a counter to sit Gahyeon on. It wasn't the destination, but you soon would get there but for now.
She was laughing and smiling, you were in a crazy haze. You pulled back. Eyes locked as the playful hands grabbed onto the ends of her black dress. You didn't waste any moment as her porcelain skin revealed itself as you peeled that dress off her—from the tips of her toes, her luscious legs, toned stomach, and torso. A momentary break of eye contact as the garment blocked your sight of her.
Look up and down. Magnificence exuded as inch and every corner of her felt it was sculpted by a higher being itself. Her porcelain skin felt like clouds on your palm, and the way her body subtlety reacted… each touch shivers, each touch was electrifying.
Gahyeon wasn't one to just be the one almost on her birthday with only her matching black lingerie. She pulled you by the hand, grabbed your shirt, and didn't waste any moment to remove it. She ogled at you—it was a sight for her—it was the prize that was for hers alone.
“You’re mine,” Gahyeon said, asserting her ownership over you as she bit her lips, almost drolling while eyeing you. She didn't waste any more time as she pulled even closer for another make-out session—this time more athirst. Each feathery touch made her more hungry, intoxicated, and addicted. Kisses were her morphine—each one made her forget the pain and put her on a high.
“I’m yours.” You broke the kiss. You traveled from her lips to her left ear as you engulfed her for a hug. She wrapped her leg around your hips. The distance was small. It didn’t allow any wild movement, but that was okay, being able to see her gorgeous face up close was more than enough. This time she was smiling. You had only seen it through your peripheral vision, but her lips, her eyes, they both were happy.
“Shut up, carry me to the bed, and fuck me,” Gahyeon ordered. Giggles left your mouth as you gently carried her off the countertop table. She hugged you and nestled on your shoulders. She rested and relished once again taking advantage of the comfort of your warmth.
Soon you laid her down on the bed. While you caught your breath, you took a moment to once again look at the art in front of you. She wasn’t crying. Gahyeon was happy. She was anticipating. She was like a kid waiting for her request to be granted. You could stare at her all day, but her order, you needed it as much as she did.
You smirked at her as you unbuckled your pants and stripped down to your birthday suit. She smirked back and taunted you with her body. She didn’t have any intention to remove her lingerie. She wanted you to do it. Although fucking her with that sexy lingerie still on was still also an option, you wanted her to be as bare as you were—completely naked and vulnerable.
“Why are you so lazy?” You grabbed the hem of her black thong and tried to peel it off her. It was stubborn, and her ass held on to it. You lifted that peach ass of hers that she spent so much time in the gym to achieve for a moment just to get it off, began to slowly remove it off her lips, making its way down her smooth and slender porcelain legs, and revealed a treasure, her smooth, glistening pink lips.
You wanted a taste. You wanted to tease her. So you dove right into the treat in front of you. You started with kisses up and down her inner thighs, gaining soft moans while your lips repeatedly contacted her warm skin. You planted wet kisses on her thighs again, but this time dangerously near her wet folds.
“Just do it already.” Gahyeon was already squirming. She wanted it, and a lick down her thighs, staining her pristine thighs with long licks garnered even more moans. You giggled mischievously while she was getting more and more impatient, but before she could complain once again, the first lick came in, tracing her pink slit—one long sweet taste of her wet folds.
Teasing her might have backfired as she grabbed onto your head, and pushed you in her legs forcibly, forcing you to continue eating her. You didn’t have any choice, buried in her crotch, you accepted your fate, and her delicious pussy. Explore every corner. Reach the deepest depths. You dove in to find out how deep your tongue could reach inside her. You basked and inhaled the aroma of her pussy. You didn’t let any of her juices pass your mouth. And Gahyeon took it all in, receiving all of it, moaning and expressing how pleasurable it was all.
You let your hot breath blow against her crotch, and she whined in response. Quickly, you went in with an up-and-down motion deep inside using your tongue. She cussed, she moaned, and she quivered as you continued eating her out.
“More!” She exclaimed as if that was the cue, you put pressure on her clit. You swirled around it, gaining louder and more high-pitched moans as you ran circular patterns on it. Push and swirl. You gently pushed it with your tongue, then took it in your mouth and sucked on her clit.
Her legs squished, and her nails dug in deeper and deeper as every second passed by. She pushed you deeper in hopes that your tongue would reach deeper inside her slits. It was getting harder to breathe as minutes went by. Your head was going numb from the pain from her nails digging. Her wet pussy almost drowned you. Buried against her crotch, all you could do was go crazy, trying to taste and service her as much as you can, sucking her wet and delicious pussy as you turned Gahyeon into a squirming mess.
The only option was to tap out. You forcibly disengaged, simultaneously edging her. It wasn’t time for her to reach her climax, and it wasn’t time yet for a death by thighs head locking you. You licked your lips and caught your breath. You smirked fully knowing what you did as you tenderly caressed her thighs while she pouted.
“What are you looking at?” You teasingly snarked at her, and she glared at you before you got on top of her. You weren’t one to keep her waiting when you just edged her. And just like any other time before and now, you lined the tip of your cock up against the opening of her entrance and captured her lips for a kiss as you pushed—slowly and caringly, entering her inch by inch smoothly inside of her already soaking wet quim.
Gahyeon hugged every bit of your cock. She was perfectly wet and perfectly tight every time, and it was always cute how she was also perfectly cute, innocent, and sexy at the same time. Sex with her had always been a mix of comfort and excitement. With Gahyeon you wouldn’t call it sex, it was the ever-cliched lovemaking.
You started fucking her, slowly, sensually, and carefully. It was different from how you teased her and edged. You pressed bodies, allowing each other to relish the warmth of each other. You let her feel you gravitating against her. Gahyeon had your weight on top of her and she had always loved it. It felt like the sun, warm on the skin, but it didn't burn. Sweaty and almost smelly but it felt cold and fresh to be so close to her. Again and again, like clockwork, you slowly pull your member out from her, but as soon as your tip peeked out of her, you bury yourself deep inside her, causing a melody of her pleasure getting fill up.
“I love you,” she uttered in between her moans.
Again, pull, and push.
“I love you too.”
Now that you had built a slow and steady rhythm, you gradually upped the pace. Faster but not so sudden. The goal was to induce pleasure and not pain, pushing in but within the comfort of your lover just as she loved as both of you became moaning messes—quick huffed breaths—sounds of sex only the two of you know of. The smell of sex, sweat, and saliva lingered in the air. Moans, squelching noises, profanities, proclamations of love, and chased breaths, roared inside that hotel room, accompanied by the warmth of each other.
You started pounding her, faster and more vigorously than before. Full of vigor but full of control. A little bit rough but Gahyeon wrapped her leg around your lips nonetheless, she wouldn’t want you breaking off her while you thrust and looked at her with the desire to pleasure her. Her eyes shut close and she became louder, screaming at the pleasure of your cock.
For Gahyeon this kind of physical intimacy was a form of assurance to ease her fear. Gahyeon feels your love the most when you two are connected. Sex is the highest form of love. Sex is the greatest expression of it. The heat she was relishing, the roughness, the gentleness, the pain, and the pleasure were evidence of love.
It was a treasure how your palm caressed her cheek underneath all that mess. After all, she was a mess and you were a mess, but there was this certain kind of beauty and order amidst all of that and only you two knew of it—only your love knew of it.
There was no time for rest as you as that climax was coming. She didn’t want you to stop fucking, and you didn’t want to either. You fucked her hard and fast. It was a high that you knew too much of. A drug that was only available for you. A medicine that heals Gahyeon and you, but keeps you addicted. It was a contradiction, amidst all that high and intoxication, being lost in the trance of pleasure, you didn’t get lost and chased the pleasure for you alone. You chased her pleasure, and she chased your pleasure, aiming to please each other.
You found her breast, still clothed in her black brassiere. You squeezed and she whined in response and quickly tried to get rid of it, reaching for her straps and setting them aside before flipping them to expose her bountiful mounds. You dove right onto it, took her hardened nippled, and suck on it while massaging the other breast. It was softer than marshmallows, it was like you were kissed by a cloud.
However, you didn’t forget fucking her, you thrust as you sucked like a baby on Gahyeon’s breast. All Gahyeon could do was to receive all of it, and hug your head, hoping it would help you eat her better.
It was time to give attention to the unattended boob. You removed yourself from her boob and left red marks all over her breasts, and a lingering feeling of stretch on her nipple, saliva all over it. You did the same to the other boob, suckles, bites, kisses, peck, smack, smooch, and snog, all the things you could to do to make her release those lovely sounds and to compel her to hug you more tightly and to enable yourself to feel her warmth more, get buried on her breast more.
Although you couldn’t give her boob as much attention at the one as she pulled you up for a momentary rest. You made eye contact with you and chased your breath. Get pulled by her brown orbs. The tips of her lips raised, showcasing her iconic fox smile. Her eyes were as dazed as yours, but she still gazed at you lovingly before uttering the words, “Kiss me.”
“I love you, Lee Gahyeon.” You gladly complied and dove right into kissing her. Gahyeon cupped your cheeks. It was an amorous kiss you shared. A kiss to last a lifetime. One of too many. Certainly not the last but you kissed her as if it was the last. It was as sweet as the first though. You slowed down your pace to allow yourself to relish it more, the way your cock stirred her insides, the it twitches after hitting her deepest parts every time, the way it filled her, the way her lips connect to yours, the way you fuck her while you two shared a loving kiss, and the way she loves you.
Soon a knot in your loins introduced itself to you. What she was chasing for you eventually came and without breaking the kiss of the movement of your hips. You felt a built-up in your groins as her quim clenched, and tightened around your cock. It was time for her too. She tightened her hug, nails dug into your back as you slammed deep inside and pulled her out again and again until you could no longer hold it another.
One last time for the last run, putting in all of your remaining stamina. You fucked like you had every intention to impregnate her. Both of you groan in great pleasure as you let loose to release wave after wave of your thick semen deep inside her while quivered, shut her eyes, bit your lips, and bucked her hips as her orgasm collided with you. An instant climax, and delight, with her plugged pussy leaking out juices that were mixed with her fluids yours. Her orgasm was strong as all of that built up in her stomach released a wave of ecstasy.
The high felt like forever. The satisfaction was great. Both climaxes subsided and you felt your flaccid member slipping out of her, and her pussy finally unplugged, leaked out your cum. After a few seconds of being frozen in place, Gahyeon released your lip and you let out a sigh of relief before licking the blood off your lip. You collapsed beside her and she turned to face you and hugged you as she tried to recover from the hot session herself.
“I love you too.” Gahyeon gave you a peck, resulting in you blushing. Out of embarrassment you turned your back on her, stood up to get tissues and that thing, and hid it underneath the box of tissues. You went back to the bed and helped her wipe herself and lean off the leaking semen in between her legs. She was smiling mischievously as you wiped her as if she was planning to tease you.
“Why are you acting shy? You’re wiping as if that’s not your cum and you didn’t just eat my pussy.” Her words made you choke and she just laughed heartily. Gahyeon was back to her usual self—cheerful and teasing master.
“I’m not, I’m just thinking about how much I love you.”
You reasoned out. It was far from what she said, but it was the truth. Looking back to all that happened, you couldn’t help but just be happy and relief that you ended up this way. It might be just a hunch but it felt like things would finally get better from here on. It was a little bit chaotic but you finally settled it with SuA. You didn’t choose Gahyeon instead of SuA. You just love Gahyeon and there wasn’t even a competition. What happened with SuA and your feelings for her won’t be forgotten, but it was a lesson. A lesson you would take as you journey with Gahyeon.
Gahyeon is love.
“Why do you have to think about that when you just have to show me?” Gahyeon gazed at you. Her eyes were full of expectation. She was looking far ahead. Looking at the things you two will do from now on. You were looking forward to it too. Gahyeon is the loveliest girl and she isn’t one to hide her love. You just hope to be more like her, and be more confident of your love for her.
“Yes, I’ll do that from now on,” You answered her. You took her hand and smiled at her lovingly. Love was truly bare. Your feelings were as bare as your naked bodies as both of you wore your hearts out. And looking at her, you knew it was time.
You took her left hand and kissed it. Gahyeon just smiled, not suspicious of anything as you reached for the ring you had hidden earlier. Gahyeon just watched. Her eyes showed a hint of confusion. You just continued smiling. Although, maybe there was a hint of nervousness and awkwardness.
“Gahyeon…” You call for her before kissing your fist, still not revealing the ring you had inside it. At this point, Gahyeon already had an idea of what was happening. Tears formed in her eyes with the anticipation of it. And she was right as you revealed the ring. Her mouth kept agape, surprised, and couldn’t believe what was about to happen. Gahyeon’s puppy eyes were both in shock and filled with bliss.
It felt like your heart was about to burst out of nervousness. Will she say yes? Will she decline? Those questions played in your head on repeat as you held the ring tightly. It was an expensive ring or anything that could put a hole in your pockets, but it was something more important. The heirloom ring from your mother. An old piece of gold jewelry with a humble diamond.
“Will you marry me?” You finally asked her and beads of clear crystal started flowing down her beautiful face. You let of her hand and wipe them off.
“Stop crying will you?” You said to her but you started crying also. With the ring, you imagined dreams of seeing her in that white dress, walking down the aisle while you wait for her at the altar. You’ll spend time off for a vacation, a honeymoon on the beachside—you know how much Gahyeon loves the beach. Maybe even starting your own family.
Fingers fidget, and hearts boomed. Time slowed down at that moment in that hotel room. You panicked and weren’t sure if you would wipe her tears first or wipe yours first, but you opted for a third option. You took her left hand once again, and carefully put the ring on her finger.
“Yes, I will marry you!” Gahyeon didn’t stop crying, but she didn’t seem sad at all. The smile painted all over her face said it all, and seeing that made you feel warm inside. It was burning, but it didn’t hurt at all. Neither of you stopped crying but it was okay.
It was a beautiful moment to share. She hugged you tightly, and you reciprocated until you found yourself sharing a kiss. A lovely kiss. Then once again locked eyes, gazing at each other, ever smiling and happy.
Her smile was beautiful. Her happiness was the most beautiful thing to exist. And you’ll do anything to protect that.
Yes, just like that day.
That one cold winter night.
We were out late because of a schoolwork project. The other kids had already gone home and were the only ones to go in the same direction so we walked together. Well, I wouldn’t let a girl walk home that late at night.
We were walking and at that time, we weren’t particularly close or friends yet.
But we ended up talking.
You talked about your dreams. And I talked about mine.
It was just fun.
And maybe,
That was when I started developing something for you.
Well, I realized too late that it was love.
But maybe at that moment, I fell in love with you unknowingly.
All of you were just too beautiful.
The moon bore witness to it.
Your laughs.
Your smile.
Your eyes.
Your dream.
Your everything.
That was when Jasmines bloomed in winter.
Aletheia & Etterath
*Series End*
***
A/N - idk did I do something? i think it's bad HAHAHAH
#reader insert#panchatea#kofi commission#kpop smut#readerinsert#dreamcatcher smut#dreamcatcher#gahyeon x reader#sua x reader#Youtube
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pairing: joel x reader x tommy
tags/cws: sex pollen (reader is infected by it), breeding kink
summary: joel is just being a good friend by helping reader out, and tommy is just being a good brother by tag-teaming
a/n: div creds to @animatedglittergraphics-n-more
this is kind of theoretically set in jackson (AU where nothing bad happens lol), but we're going to pretend that the writer has finished tlou2 (and has not been caught up in playing silent hill) and is not just guessing about the details of jackson and such
wc: 2.2k
tags: @vaaaaaiolet @leonfucker3000 @withonly-sweetheart
You've experienced your fair share of unthinkable, inexplicable things since the outbreak began. Out of necessity, you've become familiar with the cordyceps — what it looks like, how it spreads, what the cure is (a bullet to the head). Whatever you just inhaled is not the cordyceps virus, but you feel zero relief in knowing that. You have no idea what this is and what it's going to do to you.
Joel calls out to you from above.
"Don't come down here," you yell back. "I think something's wrong."
It's the best way you can explain it.
"Then get your ass up here!" He's pissed, he's scared.
You shouldn't have been so reckless. You were stupid to think you'd find anything good in that abandoned bunker. If there was once something worth your excursion, it's long gone. Like everywhere else, it's been looted.
When Joel reaches out to help you pull yourself above ground, you can't help but notice how big his hands are, how strong he is, the way his arms flex when he pulls you up to relative safety.
"What happened down there?"
"I don't know, but I feel… weird. Something's not right with me."
"You didn't get bit did you?"
"No, it's not that. Definitely not. It's something different. When I went down there, it was like I set off some sort of alarm system, except it didn't make any noise, it just sprayed out some sort of blue smoke."
"And you inhaled it?"
"I didn't mean to."
The route back is short, but it's torture – your whole body feels like its been set on fire, and you want to keel over in pain.
"Do you need me to carry you?" Joel asks.
"No, I'm fine." You're not fine. You're out of breath, dizzy, aching for something.
Joel ignores your lies and picks you up. The minute he touches you, you know exactly what your body wants — him. You whimper at his touch — his hands aren't anywhere they shouldn't be, but your whole body feels sensitive.
"Am I hurting you?"
"No, not really… I don't know."
"Why are you whining then? Either you're hurt or you're on the edge of a fuckin' orgasm."
He laughs, but you don't.
"…Both," you admit.
He looks at his hands, making sure he's not touching you inappropriately.
"I don't understand. I'm not touching you down there, and you're not touching yourself. You got vibrating panties or somethin'?"
"I wish."
He stops. Then, in a whisper despite the fact that you're alone, asks, "Do you think it's whatever you inhaled?"
"Yeah."
"Let's hurry down to the infirmary then."
"No. There's nothing they can do for me."
"Don't say that. I'm sure it's nothin' and they'll be able to fix you up just fine."
"No, they can't. I know what I need. I can feel it."
Or at least, you hope it's what you need. You'd rather die than walk into a clinic and tell the nurse that you're so horny you think you're about to, well, die. You've made your bed and you're ready to lie in it — so long as Joel is there too.
He changes course slightly, and walks towards his house. Not much needs to be said. The look of sheer desperation in your eyes is enough. Has he dreamt about fucking you before? Maybe, but that's not why he agrees to do it. Above all else, Joel cares about you.
You don't make it to his bedroom, only to the living room couch. The curtains are drawn and Joel lives alone, so it makes little difference (minus the back pain that you'll inevitably endure from a couch rendezvous).
It's not your first time having sex, and you know it's not Joel's either, but it's the first time you've ever done this together. See, in your nighttime fantasies, he comes to you — on you, in you, for you — quite often, but in the real world, you're just close friends. The rumors that circulate are (unfortunately) not true: you're not fucking Joel. Or, you weren't. Now, you are. Now, you're tearing off your clothes because holy fuck it's hotter than it should be in April. You're feeling feverish as you help Joel strip (while he takes a minute to be awestruck by your bare body).
You're fiddling helplessly with his belt buckle like it's a brand new contraption to your hazy eyes.
"Are you sure you don't want me to get you ready first? Could go down on you…"
If someone put a gun to your head and asked you if you'd ever turn down Joel Miller offering to go down on you, you'd be dead. But despite how much you crave his mouth on your skin, you swear this thing might kill you if you wait any longer.
"I need you," is all you can muster.
"Lemme see if I can find a—"
He stands up, presumably to get a condom, but you grab him by the wrist.
"I need you," you say with more force this time.
It takes a mere glimpse of his cock — hard, throbbing in anticipation — to know that he needs you too.
"Jesus fuckin' Christ," he says when his hand reaches your glistening slit.
You let out a pathetic whimper. You're no longer in control. Whatever this toxin is, it's taken over. It needs Joel, you need Joel, it needs you to need Joel (more than you did already).
"I know, baby, I know," he soothes you as he steadies himself above you.
He slides into you with ease, buries himself to the hilt and then stops. He looks up to the ceiling, like he's about to speak to God, but all that leaves his mouth is a single word, "fuck", it comes out harsh, through gritted teeth, yet ultimately, it's his surrender.
His surrender to your needs, to your cunt that grips him like a vise and soaks him like a leaky faucet. Both of his hands hold your hips steady so he can pound into you as you beg for him to go harder, and he swears he hasn't fucked anyone like this in the last 20 years. Honestly, he's shocked his knees can handle it. He ought to have you ride him if you're so intent on controlling the pace, but then again, he doesn't trust your impulses.
Not only is he going to embarrass himself if he cums quickly, but he'll also leave you hanging. One hand moves to cover your mouth because he can't have you screaming. It takes everything in him to stifle you when you're moaning his name.
It's something between a warning and an apology. "I'm sorry, baby—I'm gonna cum." Naturally, he attempts to pull out since he's not wearing a condom, but you lock your legs around his hips and rip his hand from your mouth so you can tell him the three most important words right now, "Don't. Pull. Out."
"I don't wanna get you pregnant—"
"I want you to."
It all makes sense. "Is that what it wants?" His curiosity is piqued and the distraction of solving this puzzle keeps his orgasm at bay. "It wants me to… breed you? It's making you want me to get you pregnant?"
"Yes," you say a bit too enthusiastically. "Joel, please, I need you to."
"Need me to what?" He knows exactly what, and you can see that in the slight upward curve of his lips.
You groan in frustration — would he really be so cruel as to make you beg in a moment of crisis? Maybe.
"I need to hear you say it."
Joel could easily fill you to the brim right now, he needs to hear you beg because he'll need the memory later when he's alone, when he thinks about you. If you make it out of this situation, that is. But, fuck, if you're right, and all he really has to do is get you pregnant, there shouldn't be any problem.
"I need you to put a baby in me," you say, and while your body is still running wild in its starvation, embarrassment flashes across your face.
When Joel agrees, your orgasm overtakes you -- simply the thought is enough to make you gush all over his furniture. You thought you'd never reach your peak and be forced to teeter on the edge for the rest of your life. You hold him as close as you possibly can, forcing him deeper inside you with your legs around his hips and your arms around his back, digging your nails into his skin. He returns the sting with a bite to your neck, muffling a groan that threatens to escape him.
You're writhing against the pleasure, the overstimulation and the need for more mixing together, and Joel, melting in your arms, soothes you as best he can. His words are filthy and sweet all at once.
"It's okay, baby. I'm gonna put a baby in you, gonna get you knocked up. Don't gotta worry 'bout a thing."
When his grunts turn breathy, barely short of whimpers, you realize that he's turned on by this too. It's a blessing and a curse — his pride grapples with his arousal, fighting to keep his orgasm at bay but it's in vain. He cums inside you, and it feels like he's the one dying, and ascending to heaven (a place he never believed he'd step foot in).
You try to keep him inside you, but he insists that he has to pull out at some point.
Joel's about to put his pants on when the door swings open. At first you're afraid it's Ellie, and even though she's an adult, she's practically Joel's daughter – she's the last person who would want to see this. Who else has a key to Joel's house? you think. He's not giving them out to just anyone, even you don't have one (and you could be carrying his child).
Tommy, you realize, just as his voice echoes through the hall, calling for Joel.
"Hold on," Joel yells back, much louder than he needs to, considering the fact that there's only one wall between your naked body and an unsuspecting visitor.
Footsteps approach, and Joel gets the word "wait" halfway out of his mouth before Tommy enters the room. You all share a moment of silence before he apologizes, and excuses himself.
As he's walking towards the door, you try to pull Joel back in, telling him how badly you need him.
But he has another idea. Unconventional at best, but it's not like you're in an everyday situation anyway.
"Tommy," he says, stopping him before he leaves. "Will you do me — us — a huge favor?"
"Yeah, I won't tell anyone. Don't worry about it," he says, preemptively.
"No, no. A different favor." He peeks his head into the living room to see your miserable, desperate state.
"What's going on?"
Joel explains everything as best he can in as little time as possible. You admit, with less shame than you would otherwise, that you need someone to fuck you, and if Joel has to wait a bit to recover, it's a good thing he has a brother.
"You're sure about this?" Tommy asks.
Once you swear on your life that you are absolutely positive about this, he gives in, allows himself to indulge because ultimately, Tommy wants this too. Maybe their shared DNA influences their shared kinks, or maybe you're an attractive woman, splayed out on the couch naked and begging to be fucked.
Tommy makes quick work of his clothes, discarding them on the floor — he can sense your eagerness to have him inside you, almost as intense as his own desire.
It's not like you needed any lubricant anyway, but Joel left you even slicker than before, so Tommy slides inside you with greater ease despite being nearly as big as his brother. He's quick to lift your legs to gain greater leverage so he can up the pace of his thrusts.
You moans, despite how loud they are, do not cover up the wet sounds of Tommy fucking you.
"Are you sure you want me to cum inside you?"
"Yes, please, need you to get me pregnant," you say, throwing him for a loop. Whoops, you must've forgotten to mention that part.
He looks at you, then at Joel, in disbelief, assuming this is some sort of trick, a test, a gift — it doesn't really matter because he's too far gone to hold back.
"Fuck, I'll knock you up if that's what you really want, baby."
All you can say is "please".
"Wonder whose baby it'll be," he says, steady thrusts gaining momentum.
If he's toying with you, it's working, strange as it might be, the concept is a turn-on. It's Schrodinger's baby. You cannot be sure whose baby you're carrying -- if there is one at all -- so you can imagine it as both Joel's and Tommy's at once.
You look at Tommy, eyes half-lidded, lips parted, mind blanking. Surely, he's not having a scientific breakthrough, but maybe a transcendental experience.
Then, you look at Joel, who holds the awe of a full auditorium in his eyes, but there will be no standing ovation for your performance because he's using all of his strength to hold himself back from rushing the metaphorical stage, and one hand is busy palming his aching cock through his jeans to subdue that urge.
Tommy takes your chin, and with a sudden sternness, says, "Look at me when I cum inside you. Not him. He's not fucking you."
But when your eyes meet his, he's not the only one approaching his peak – you are going over the edge with him. You swear you might've blacked out because Tommy is already pulling out of you when you fully regain consciousness.
Once you get your bearings straight you realize something: you feel a lot better.
#joel miller x reader#joel miller smut#tommy miller x reader#tommy miller smut#tlou smut#tlou fanfiction#pedro pascal character fanfic#pedro pascal characters
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Nights Like This: Part Three
Roman x black!oc
Warnings: language, angst
Word count: 1.4k
a/n: guys are we riding at dawn or not lmaoo??? if i forgot to tag you, or if you would like to be added to the tag list please feel free to lmk 💕
“Tell me what?”
Serena and Roman froze, which angered Zoe to another level, because it’s one thing to screw her over, but its another to play in her fucking face.
Roman turned towards Serena,“Give us some space…” His voice was stern, more of a demand than a request. Serena briefly looked at Zoe and sighed, she proceeded to grab her keys and walk outside.
“Where the fuck is she going, you both seemed to have a lot to say.” Zoe started walking towards the door to confront Serena, but as she was about to reach the door her movements were halted when Roman grabbed her by the waist gently pulling her back.
“Baby we need to talk, just you and me please…” he pleaded. Seconds later she heard a car engine start. This bitch really had the audacity to leave without saying a word.
“Oh so now you want to fucking talk? Because you damn sure didn’t have shit to say before I found the condoms,” Zoe sneered as she yanked her body away from him.
Roman paused and took a deep breath, slowly rubbing his hand over his beard, “Baby I fucked up, I’m sorry...”
“You’re sorry, is that really all you have to say?” Her voice cracked, she could feel her throat begin to tighten.
Roman felt like the biggest piece of shit. Seeing the exhaustion and pain in her eyes, hurt him. He hated to see her cry, let alone being the reason behind it. There was no excuse for what he did, and he knew it. Which is exactly why he didn’t want to tell her, but actions have consequences. He made his bed, it was time to fucking lie in it.
“Baby I—” As he began to speak Zoe cut him off, “Roman I’m gonna ask you this one time. Did you or did you not, cheat on me with Serena?”
Roman lowered his head, his gaze now shifted towards the floor. He paused in silence for a short moment, she could see his hands were slightly fidgeting. Roman briefly looked up at her, still avoiding making eye contact.
“Yes,” his voice was barely above a whisper.
Zoe’s heart felt like it was ripped out of her chest. She knew the answer, but she wanted him to have the balls to actually fucking say it. Tears that she had been fighting back started to roll down her face, sobs escaping her. “Fuck you, Roman.” She started to walk away, but was stopped when Roman walked in front of her stopping her in her tracks.
“Zo don’t leave, please just talk to me.”
“You’re such a piece of shit, I fucking trusted you. She wiped away some of her tears, which was of no use considering she couldn’t stop crying, “My best friend? Are you fucking kidding me? You’ve only met her a handful of times!” she yelled.
“I want you to tell me why, you wanted to talk, so fucking talk,” she hissed.
Roman’s eyes were glistened with tears, his shoulders were slumped as he inhaled a deep breath, “I—I came to her to help me plan our trip and your birthday dinner. I figured since I don't know shit when it comes to throwing parties, I’d hire someone who not only works in that profession, but someone who would know what you’d like.”
“Yeah it seems she ended up finding exactly what I liked,” she scoffed.
Roman put his head down, his voice getting lower, “I ended coming over at different times over the span of two months to approve some of the planning details. Little by little I noticed she was flirting more than usual, in the beginning I tried to ignore it, but over time I—I began to like the attention.”
Zoe felt sick to her stomach, she listened quietly while angrily wiping away her tears. She wanted to leave to avoid hearing this bullshit, but a part of her wanted to know why. Why would two people who claimed to love her, hurt her in the most disrespectful way possible.
Seeing Zoe silently crying made the pit of Roman’s stomach drop, he was disgusted with himself. How in the hell did he let something so stupid, jeopardize what he had? He loves Zoe, he couldn’t give two fucks about Serena. Yet, he let a moment of weakness ruin everything and hurt the one person he loved more than anyone.
He walked towards her, and gently lifted her face. “Baby, please look at me,” Zoe refused, and that fucking killed him.
“I don’t need all the details, just tell me what happened...” her lower lip was slightly trembling. She pushed him away, making sure to keep a distance between them.
“Before my last visit, I let my ego cloud my judgment. I went to the store, bought the condoms and headed over to her house.” Roman paused, he was internally struggling to say the rest, but he knew he had to, he owed her that. “We kissed, and she ended up giving me head.”
“Let me guess, you returned the favor?” Silence. Just as she expected. “Of course you did because you’re such a generous tribal chief, right?”
He took a deep breath, his chin dipping to his chest. “I went with the intention to fuck her Zo, I did. And I know that there’s no amount of apologies in the world that will change what I did, but I need you to know that I didn’t fuck her.”
“So you’re telling me the condom unwrapped itself?”
“I was going to fuck her baby, I was. But when the time came, I thought of you, and I just— I just couldn’t do that to you.”
Roman walked towards her, gently moving some of her hair out of her face, he wiped some of her tears away with his thumb. He felt a sharp pang of guilt seeing her so broken, the weight of what he did was fully sinking in his chest.
“Baby please look at me.”
She doesn’t know why she actually did, but she felt so numb as if nothing even really mattered anymore. She looked at his big brown eyes, eyes that she once viewed with love and admiration, she now saw with despair.
A few tears slipped down his face. “Zoe please understand that she means absolutely fucking nothing to me. I love you baby. I’m so sorry. I’m sorry that I lied to you, I’m sorry that I hurt you—”
“If it was me that did this to you, how would you feel?”
He sighed heavily, facing down. He couldn’t even say a word. What a fucking hypocrite.
“You knew all the bullshit that I went through with my ex, and you went and did this shit. I opened up to you, and you promised me you would never do what he did to me. I feel so fucking stupid to have actually believed you. The fact that you wouldn’t have told me shit had I not caught you makes me sick to my stomach. You want to know what I think Roman? I think you’re a fucking coward.”
Zoe grabbed her keys and headed towards the door. She didn’t care about leaving her things behind, that slut seemed to like her leftovers anyways.
“Zo, please don’t do this to me,” he pleaded. Every single emotion that she tried to hold in was released, she was crying uncontrollably. She ignored him and was able to get in her car.
“You did this to yourself. You don’t have to worry about me anymore Roman, you and Serena can go fuck yourselves.”
Zoe started driving home, but the farther she got the more her anger built. She pulled over at a store to park and try to compose herself, she was so mad her hands were trembling. The memory of Serena letting her cry on her shoulder while being the actual cause of her tears, and leaving without even trying to apologize made her even more pissed. Fuck this. She put her gps back on Serena’s address, enough is enough. The only thing on her mind right now, was beating this bitch’s ass.
#roman reigns#the tribal chief#otc#roman reigns fic#roman reigns x black reader#roman reigns x black!oc#roman reigns x oc#roman reigns fanfiction
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Nectar
Astarion x f!reader drabble
Tags: explicit | cunnilingus | biting | blood
His teeth grazed your most intimate areas, almost a threat, causing a tidal wave of fear and shameful arousal. You couldn't say with any certainty that he'd hold back the impulses you knew he held as he roamed your body; if you failed to ask him to stop, you'd likely be dead by morning. You couldn't blame him. The hunger was his nature, and his desire for your blood would always be stronger than that for your flesh.
He let out a barely audible growl as his tongue dipped between your folds, swiping across the swollen bundle of nerves that housed the unbearable tension you'd held all day. You shuddered, thighs squeezing his head that prompted a dark stare through hooded eyes. His grip on your legs tightened, nails digging into your skin and leaving painful indents that paled in comparison to the pleasure you felt in between your thighs.
Every lick, swirl and suck sent you further into a craze, blood rushing away from your head so quickly your ears pounded and hearing dulled. You whispered his name as you approached your peak, gripping that silver hair with a desperately tight grip, only spurring him on in his vigorous assault on your cunt. His tongue dipped inside you, lapping at your juices as if he were starved; and he was, but for the sweet nectar that ran in your veins.
"M-make me come...and you can suck me dry," you sighed, meaning every word.
That got his attention, his piercing eyes searching yours for any hint of a lie, before he delved deeper, harder, faster. You were so close, absolutely terrified amongst the lustful want of being able to sate him, completely. As his tongue returned to your nub, his fingers delved inside your dripping entrance, curling and teasing the very last of your restraint from you.
"Fuck, yes..."
He purred against your skin in response, and you fell apart, back arching and body writhing as the pulsing waves of ecstasy crashed over you again and again. He didn't stop, holding you still with a bruising grip as he continued to lap at you until you pleaded; stop, please...
The next thing you knew, his teeth were sinking into the soft flesh of your thighs, icy cold fading to an aching numbness. You looked down as he feasted, barely able to focus your eyes but intent on watching as the blood stained his lips and his eyes flashed a vivid red as he watched you through every second. His gaze almost held a thanks, amongst the glazed look of his desperate hunger and unimpeded lust.
Your head swam, deep red streams streaking your legs and splattering on the cold floor, but you let him drink. Just a little longer. Your last lucid plea was to stop, before the darkness overcame you.
-
"Good morning, darling," Astarion said, his sultry voice waking you slowly from your slumber.
You felt weak, dizzy, and as you opened your eyes the light caused you to wince in pain. His face swam into view; still stained, bright and happy.
"Morning," you managed to stutter weakly.
"I'm sorry if I went a little too far. You're just so delicious," he said, his warm breath ghosting the skin of your neck. "Not just your blood."
"Anything for you."
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Toge Accidentally Uses His Cursed Speech on You (Part 4)
🔅content: Light angst/light comfort; gn!reader; no pronoun mentions
🔅synopsis: It's been 2 days since you last seen Toge... How do you go about this? What are you supposed to do? You wonder how to address the situation at hand...
🔅a/n: "What happened to posting part 4 soon" I ended up scraping the entire part 4 draft and remade it because I didn't like it :'D Thank you everyone for being so patient and putting up w my bs aaa Let me know if you want to be in the tags list and enable ur tagging :3
[JJK Masterlist] [Part 1 & 2] [Part 3]
🔅Word Count: 2.2K
"...Should I... open it...?" You asked yourself quietly, looking down on your phone as you stared at the multiple notifications you received from Toge.
13 missed calls
31 new messegaes
All unopened, all unanswered.
Slowly, you hover your finger over to his chat box, however, you hesitate- quickly shutting off your phone and plopping down on the soft mattress where you sat.
While the rest of the Okkotsu family went out to watch the movies, you decided to stay in the house by yourself. "You should come...! I'm sure it will help lift your spirits." Mrs. Okkotsu offered, to which you kindly declined her offer.
You figured you needed some time to be alone for now, but the lack of presence in the house ended up cauing a deafening silence to fill the halls, creating more opportunities for you to overthink the recent events between you and Toge.
'...I wonder... what did he say...'
'...why am I so scared to read it...?'
Over the past two days, you've been comfortably staying over Yuta's family home in the city. But since Yuta wasn't there at the moment, his parents and sister have been kindly accomodating you the entire time.
You were incredibly embarassed and reluctant to stay over, afraid of becoming only a nuisance to the Okkotsu family, especially since current situation between you and Toge was not at all very dire, just an arguement between two lovers.
Fortunately, Yuta and his mother were understanding and very insistent that you were welcome for as long as you'd like. Afterall, you were also one of Yuta's closest friends.
Trying your best to not cause them too much trouble, you help out with minor chores like the dishes, setting up the table, throwing out the trash- but each time you do so, you were met with gentle scolding.
"We told you to rest! You're still very hurt!"
"No no no, you're a guest, put that down!"
"We are not letting you wash the plates. Go back to bed and lie down for a nap! We'll bring you some snacks later."
"Nonsense! You are not a burden! You are a good friend of Yuta, and he asked us to take care of you, so sit down and don't worry about us."
Though that did seem to reduce the amount of guilt you felt, you were still rather embarassed for staying over someone else's family home just to hide from an ongoing dispute with Toge. So, you figured you shouldn't overstay your welcome, at least.
You look at your phone once again, staring at Toge's contact name as you remember your last encounter with him.
Staring at the ceiling above, you allow the memories from the incident flood your mind once more- remembering the sorrow, the pain, the sadness....
The entire time you knew Toge, he had always felt like the safest person to be around with, and you trusted him more than anyone- be it about your safety or your feelings. Naturally, the shock from accidentally getting cursed would shaken you up quite a lot.
You were badly hurt, both physically and emotionally.
And even for a short moment, you even felt afraid of him for the first time.
A feeling you knew would devastate him if he knew.
As shy as you were to admit it, all you did the entire day after the incident was quiety cry inside the guest bedroom in Yuta's home.
You can say that you rather had mixed feelings about the whole thing. Not a moment has passed in which you weren't thinking about it.
At first, it was shock, then fear, followed by pain before sadness, eventually leading to worry- the feeling you were experiencing right now.
Why 'worry'? You think to yourself, curious as to why there was this sense of longing to see him despite the accident.
It was a strange feeling in your chest. Most certainly, you were still very much upset and hurt about what he had done to you, but still-
"...I wonder how he must feel right now..." You hug the pillow nearest to you closer to your chest, unable to stray away the concern you felt for him.
Perhaps it was the way he looked at you the moment he misused his speech on you. The way Toge's eyes expressed so much shock, the way his voice was filled with so much guilt and fear... You have never seen him act in such a way before, especially considering the fact that he was always the more calm and composed one between the two of you.
You couldn't get the desperate tone of his voice out of your head, and you frequently find yourself vividly remembering the panicked expression he displayed on his face.
"...He must be worried..." You whisper to the pillow you held tightly, your eyelids closing as you replay the events of the accident.
More than anyone, you understood him the most, and you knew that this must be really messing up his mind right now.
It was one of his deepest fears, hurting someome he loves unintentionally with his speech, and you knew how deep this sort of wound would cut him on the inside.
More so, there was also the fact that Toge had personally witnessed the tragic events that happened to his allies in Shibuya... not to mention the fact that he had also been heavily pinning the blame on himself for the death of innocent civilians' lives.... lives which he felt responsible of protecting, all because he led them to take shelter to the same area Sukuna had unleashed his Malevolent Shrine.
'Truly...' you thought.
'this must be really messing up his mind right now....'
You turn over to your side, eyes staring blankly into the empty air in front of you.
"...He was distant and acting different from what happened in Shibuya afterall... I know he didn't mean to hurt me..." you whispered quietly, trying to think of how to address the situation.
You sat up, your hand firmly grasping your phone, a hesitant but concerned tone evident in your voice "I... don't want to make him feel any worse than he already does..."
Without a doubt, Toge was always so good to you. So protective, so understanding, so kind, so loving...
He was always there for you at your lowest points... and you never even had the chance to return such comfort to him before, so you think to yourself:
'...it's my turn.'
Your previous attempt to aid his sorrow didn't end up so well, but that's why you were willing to try again; To try again for him.
He probably hasn't been consoled ever since the incindent in Shibuya either. You, Panda, Yuta, or even Maki hadn't heard from him the entire time, and that's considering that all of you are his closest friends.
You ponder about it, and then you realize he probably wouldn't have ended up hurting you by accident or behaving so distant towards everyone if he had just allowed himself to be comforted- to be held and be told 'it's okay.'
...And you couldn't help but want to be that person who does that for him.
The more you thought about this, the more you wanted to see him.
You already released all the shock, hurt, and sadness for the past few days through a few weeping sessions in the small guest room before, and you think it's about time to come out of hiding.
You try to gain back your composure.
"...I wonder where he is... I hope... he's not pushing himself." You glance at your wallpaper, looking at a picture of Toge holding up a silly little peace sign while he sat next to a cute little dog you randomly met on the street.
You couldn't help but chuckle softly for a moment, then, your smile slowly fades back to form a serious expression on your face.
You miss the smile in his eyes like in the photo.
The idea of him in such sadness, worry, and pain ended up hurting you just as much as well.
"...I should talk to him."
So, you unlock your phone, open messages, and look for his contact name once again.
His contact nickname and his silly little photo appear.
'Bonito Flakes'
"...There."
Just when you were about to tap his name, you paused.
"Uh... wait... what should I say...?"
You pull back your thumb from the screen, suddenly having a bit of a panic on how to address the situation.
"..How do I reach out to him...? What... did he text me..? Is he upset with me? Is he looking for me...?"
His last text was from yesterday night, so you weren't sure what should be the best mood to approach him at this moment.
Just then, as if fate had timed this moment perfectly, a notification suddenly pops up on the top of your screen.
1 new message from Bonito Flakes
You gasped, completely taken aback from seeing his name.
'Wait... I'm not ready...!!'
You panicked slightly, causing you to drop your phone on the hard wood floor by accident, a loud thump echoing throughout the room. Fortunately, the Okkotsu family still hasn't returned from their outing yet, otherwise, you'd give them another reason to be worried about you.
You sigh, picking it back up as you lightly shook your head to gain back your composure.
As you check your sceen, you see another text from Toge come in.
Then another.
And another.
It made you slightly nervous but curious as to what his multiple texts were saying right now, and it sort of made you even more worried to know what he sent.
Is he sad? Does he need you? Is he just reaching out? Is he leaving the school? Does he want to distance himself from you?
"I'll... wait a little..."
Ultimately, you decided to let him finish sending his messages before you view it.
He sent quite a handful of texts, and it took a while before the messages stopped coming in. But just to be sure, you waited for a few minutes in case he had any late follow ups.
"I'll.... wait a little more..." You whisper to yourself as you stare at the phone in front of you, hoping to view his messages during a time when he's offline- You just wanted to make sure there was enough time for you to process and react to his texts without the pressure of him waiting for your response.
But the green dot next to his profile picture was still lit up, meaning, that he would be able to immediately see your replies the moment you send it.
But you would prefer he only sees it AFTER you're done sending your responses.
Sighing heavily, you whisper once more '...I guess I'll wait again...'
You check again after a few minutes, it was still green. So you wait again.
More time had passed but still- the green dot remained.
You wait again.
It was all you could think about for the past few hours as you move back and forth from checking your phone to lying down, staring into nothing...
Untul finally, at hour three, the green dot turns dim.
And with that, you were left with no excuse to delay opening your inbox any longer. "...alright... here we go.... I guess..."
With a hefty sigh and a single tap of your finger, you open his inbox.
Your eyes widened suddenly, immediate shock at the realization.
With a quickened pace, you hurridly limped towards the nearest window, the cast on your leg creating a slight scratching sound as you drag it across the floor.
Pulling away the curtains, you scan the street below in search for the white haired boy.
You squint your eyes slightly, trying to adjust your eyes to the darkness of the night.
Then, you see him.
"He... he's still there...?"
On the opposite side of the street, there sat Toge on the small pavement across from Yuta's house.
His head rested on his arm and his head hung low, perhaps taking a bit of a nap as he waited for your reply.
A wave of guilt suddenly washes over you as you realize how long you've made him wait out in the cold for a single reply.
You text him.
Toge???? Why did you wait for me?
You look drenched, what happened???
How long have you been there???
But your messages didn't seem to get through, not showing a mark of it being delivered.
"His phone battery must've died...."
Instictively, you hurried out the room with a more detemined expression, carefully treading the stairs with your injured leg, and rushed out the door.
Unintentionally, the noise of opening the door a little too quickly echoed across the dead silent street, casuing Toge to immediately jolt himself awake.
He made eye contact with you while he remained seated across the street, shocked at your sudden appearance.
Embarassed for startling him, you slightly lose your confidence and shy away from his gaze, a small lump in your throat preventing you from voicing out any words.
Toge stood up slowly, his eyes widen but his chest beated out of nervousness.
He doesn't expect anything positve, but still, he remained hopeful, as much as he felt like he didn't deserve you.
"...um...." you started, hoping to break the akward silence that filled the air.
"...I-...."
"....."
"....p-...please, come in...."
....
[Back to JJK Masterlist] [Part 1 & 2] [Part 3] [Part 5]
a/n: So happy I finally finished this :')))))))) Shoutout to anon that poked me abt this that genuinely helped me lolol I just really needed a little push to finish this
NOTE classes are back ^^ and I'm doing some part-time comms sooo I'll be a lil busy but ofc I won't abandon this I luv this series <3
Credits to @makuzume on Tumblr || Do not steal, translate, modify, reupload my works on any platform.
tags list: @zhenyuuu @cowcreamers @mushroommorgue @yunho-leeknow @lemonnotade @exodiam @an-ever-angry-bi @cirieria @chifuyufirstwife @strxbxrrylover @sturns55
#edged y'all so bad for holding back part 4 for so long#jjk#jujutsu kaisen#fic#fanfic#fan fic#toge#inumaki#Toge.#angst#comfort#smau#x reader
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If it’s not too much, could I ask for the Love and Deepspace boys who accidentally hurt the (if you could gn) reader’s feelings? (They argued and they were wrong but lashed out either way sorta thing?) if not, completely understandable! Tysm!
The Hurts
Loving someone is giving that person the chance to hurt you and trusting that they will never do so.
🌻 Rafayel/Xavier/Zayne x Reader Tags: gn!reader, hurt/ comfort, angst A/N: I can't see our LIs to be the type to lash out at their loved ones, so I modify the request a bit. Thank you for requesting, anon-san. Hope you enjoy this story.
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𝑹𝒂𝒇𝒂𝒚𝒆𝒍
Loving someone is giving that person the chance to hurt you and trusting that they will never do so.
You had given him so many chances, and what you got in return was being hurt over and over again.
Like sitting on a never-ending roller coaster, that's the feeling when you were with him.
He made you happy, he made you sad. He gave you surprises and he also shattered many of your dreams.
Then, you had enough.
You trudged back home with heavy steps after a difficult mission. Blood drenched your uniform. The blood of Wanderers, and the blood of your comrades. The mission was a complete failure. There were a lot of people injured, and it was completely your fault.
Because you trusted someone who shouldn't have been trusted.
Rafayel was standing on an empty street corner, waiting for you. He knew you would always take the same route home. You were too predictable, that was why he played with you like a toy.
You grit your teeth. You and Rafayel each held one end of the rubber band. But he was always the first to let go.
It hurt, the feeling of being betrayed hurt so much. But you still kept walking. You did not want him to see you miserable like that. You would not give him the opportunity to trample on your feelings and trust anymore.
Rafayel's dark eyes gazed at you. You saw scales sprouting out from his face and neck. That was the day when Lemurians were at their weakest.
Nevertheless, he made the decision to stand here and wait for you to come home. As soon as he had heard the news from his spies, he immediately ran to find you even though he was in his weakest state. You stopped moving when you were just close enough away from him, to look straight into his eyes with full of indignation.
“I will explain everything.” Rafayel spoke up. And he should, but you were sick of it by now.
“That's enough, Rafayel.” You cut him off before he could say anything else. “You've said enough.”
You trusted his intelligence, only to lead your comrades into a trap. He always took advantage of your absolute trust to hurt you and the people you cared about. Especially when there was something related to the Lemurians, he suddenly became a different person. Someone you did not know.
“Your secrets…” You said, “Just keep them to yourself… I think I've had enough of your lies.”
"I did not lie." Rafayel reached out towards you but you backed away. “Everything I told you about that operation was true. I simply…”
“You simply didn't tell me the whole truth.” You said bitterly.
Rafayel withdrew his hand. He appeared so frail that he may pass out at any time at the side of the road. This time, you would not care as much. You would just leave him be.
“You showed concern for me, then you left me alone. You helped me, then pushed me into a trap... What is real, Rafayel? What is the truth that ever comes out of your mouth?”
Rafayel was silent, staring at you with pain. What an excellent performance. You almost believed him, one more time.
“What are you going to do, then? You could kill me with just one blow right now.”
“Don't challenge me.” You threatened with a glare. You hurried past Rafayel, wanting nothing more than to get home and clean off all the blood on your body and calm yourself down. Yet, despite his extreme weakness, he still has the ability to draw you in. Your eyes met his sadness. In an instant, it seemed as though you had descended to the ocean's lowest point.
“You asked me what was true.” He said, his voice shaking. “You may not believe anything else I say… But this, this alone is the truth… I will never, ever let anyone hurt you… I will never lose you again…”
𝑿𝒂𝒗𝒊𝒆𝒓
You stood in front of Xavier's house waiting impatiently. As soon as the door opened, you immediately rushed inside without even saying hello.
“Is there anything wrong?” Xavier asked gently, but his innocent look made you even more angry.
“You crossed me out of that mission, didn’t you?” You replied in anger. There were several rolled-up reports in your palm, ready to be torn apart. You aimed it in his direction. “This was originally the mission assigned to me! Why did you request to do it on your own?”
Xavier saw the problem as soon as he glanced at those papers. He tried to explain:
“That mission is too dangerous. I can't let you do it by yourself.”
“Then would it be better if you went alone?”
You gave Xavier a glance. He was trying to calm you down, but every step he took closer you moved further away. You were upset because he decided to enter a risky area without you, maybe endangering his life, and you were unaware of it until everything had been taken care of. Even with you by his side, he carried the weight of everything by himself. You did not want that, because you felt compelled to share everything with him.
"I'm sorry." Xavier was honest with you. “I should have asked you first. I decided on my own because I thought it was the best thing for you.”
“What's best for me?” You retorted. “Do you even know what is good for me? To participate in my own mission, to decide to do things as I wish, or to fight by your side!”
Only silence covered the room. You collapsed into his couch, burrowing your face into your hands. You hated this feeling of helplessness. He took away your right to make decisions, your right to accompany him on this dangerous mission. The thought that he did not need you was so painful.
“You don't believe in me…” You spoke up after a long while. When you looked up, you saw that Xavier was still standing there, looking regretful and helpless because he was unable to touch you at the time. “I thought we were a team. If we're a team, we won't hide missions from each other, we won't sneak around alone behind the other person's back..."
“I'm really sorry. That mission is much more dangerous than area N109. I can't let you risk it.”
“That means if you had to choose again, you would still do the same and hide it from me, right?”
Xavier remained silent, but you already knew the answer.
You did not know what hurt more; Xavier hiding that mission from you, or he not trusting you could complete it?
You got to your feet, looked at Xavier, and proceeded to the door.
"I truly put in a lot of training to be in a team with you. But maybe that's not enough. If you think you can do it all by yourself then so be it, I don't see the need to stay here anymore.”
"Don't." Xavier seized your hand fast to hold you there. “Don't say such things…”
You drew away from him fiercely. Xavier let out a cry and embraced his left chest at that very time.
It appeared like he was hurt. You scowled and extended a hand to touch him.
“Are you injured?”
Xavier tried to smile, but his face gradually turned pale. He took that opportunity to pull you back and wrap an arm around your waist to keep you in place.
“It's only a little cut.”
“How can it be small when you look so painful?”
Xavier struggled to breathe. He replied:
"I'm sorry. Maybe it's true that I couldn't do that task alone. You were right. We are a team, I need you.”
You feel pleased, but still very angry with Xavier. It was because he chose to go alone that he got injured like that.
“From now on, I will definitely not hide anything from you anymore. So… don't leave me alone, okay?”
You were silent for a while, but wrapped your arms around Xavier to hug him. “I have to check your wound first.”
𝒁𝒂𝒚𝒏𝒆
The more you care for someone else, the deeper the wound they cause you.
It had been a month since you could contact him. Just like that, he disappeared, again.
You were frightened. Just like when you were a child, suddenly one day, the friend who used to make snow seals for you disappeared without a trace. No one could hear about him. He had also covertly assigned your monthly health check to another physician without you knowing until you got to the hospital. The last time you had heard about him was when Dr. Greyson told you he were rushing off to the Arctic on urgent business.
How funny it was to learn that from someone other than him. No farewells, no assurances not to worry. And for an entire month, he was absent. Although you didn't have the authority to make him tell you his schedules, at least you wanted to know how long he was going to be gone and whether or not the mission was risky.
You grew more afraid and then angered as you considered him going missing once more. How could he do this to you, after everything you had been through together? Yet he dared to show his face to your house on a rainy night.
When he saw that you were covering yourself from the rain with your jacket, he moved forward to shield you. But you dashed over to the porch. You just looked at him from a distance, but near enough to see that he was alright. After that, you entered and slammed the door in his face.
Not a word was said to each other. He did not even call your name or send a text message. He stood in the pouring rain for a long, long time. You couldn't care less. That night you went to sleep fitfully, and when you woke up the next morning, your auntie neighbor told you that he had just departed a short while after your room's light went out.
You did not try to contact him again. This cold war was initiated by him, so let it be. It was now a week after his return, and you had to go to the hospital for a check-up before an important mission. When you saw the name of the physician assigned to you was Zayne, you requested for another.
Dr. Greyson found you in the waiting area. He asked about your refusal to let Zayne examine your health. Honestly, you could not find any reason to answer that wasn't too personal. So you just sat in silence.
“The first thing Zayne did when he got back was to read your files. He wanted to make sure you were fine while he was gone.”
Dr. Greyson said. You lowered your head and looked down at your clasped hands, experiencing a range of conflicting feelings.
“I don't know what happened between you two, and maybe it's none of my business, but Zayne is a friend, and I need to butt in just this once…”
You looked up at Dr. Greyson.
“Zayne went to the Arctic to seek assistance from his teacher. Things got worse as it became more and more difficult for him to control his Evol. I caught him injuring himself with his Evol. He made the decision to suffer alone until things got in control in order to protect others.”
You were shocked. Zayne had been suffering because of his Evol for the past month without you knowing, while you were blaming him for leaving you.
"Perhaps he refrained from telling you out of concern that you would worry and accompany him there."
The rest of the conversation drifted away. Then you stood up, tried to hold back your tears as you walked to Zayne's office. He sat behind the computer screen, looking up at you with mixed emotions in his eyes, although his face still remained calm.
You entered slowly, noted the scars on his hands. There were fresh cuts that were not yet healed. He must have been very hurt and lonely. What must you do to make him open up to you? What must you do so that you can share the burden with him?
“You… What's wrong?”
As soon as Zayne spoke, you hid your tears by walking towards him in a haste and pulled him into your embrace.
“Please don't go without a word... I won't be able to bear it if you disappear again..."
#requests#lad requests#heart hunters series#lad heart hunters#zayne#xavier#rafayle#qi yu#li shen#shen xinghui#rei#homura#seiya#love and deepspace fanfic#love and deepspace zayne#love and deepspace rafayel#love and deepspace xavier#love and deepspace li shen#love and deepspace shen xinghui#love and deepspace qiyu#fanfic#fanfiction#character x reader#zayne x reader#xavier x reader#rafayel x reader#love and deepspace character x reader#reader#banners and dividers by me
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