#i know you can ask to keep it and it honestly can reduce complications if i dont opt for urethral lengthening but still

[faggling]

I've been packing for two days straight and the fucking euphoria is nuts

[defilerwyrm]

I'm a trans man who wants phallo SO bad but the Fear Mongering people do makes me so scared. I have such a fear of surgery anyway and people say phallo is nearly 23hrs long, and it has more risks than heart surgery does, and idk if these are true bc I'm too scared to google it..But I want it so bad, but the stuff I hear scares me. Also people saying it doesn't have any sensation worries me. You said trans men can ask about it so I hope this is ok to do on anon!!! I'd appreciate a non fear filled reply so much thanks!!

23 hours!! Those poor surgeons, can you imagine!

Virtual hugs if you’re the hugging type, Anon, and a cool rock if you’re not.

Those things are definitely not true, not remotely. It’s a long surgery, but when I say it’s long that means it’s about 8 hours all told. It sounds like maybe someone heard it referred to as an “all-day” thing meaning a full WORK day, but instead assumed that that meant a full CALENDAR day. Or, you know, a transphobe made shit up to scare people.

It is most definitely not nearly as risky to your wellbeing as a surgery in which they saw open your sternum and cut open your actual beating heart. There is a fairly high chance of a minor complication that can result in the terrible ordeal of getting pee on your pants sometimes—a urethral fistula—and in most cases, they close up on their own anyway without needing another surgery to correct them. And in this case, “fairly high” means 40%, so it’s still less than half a chance that it’ll happen in the first place. At worst it’s annoying. Serious complications, the type that put you in danger, are extremely rare.

The sensation thing is also false, because they literally harvest a length of nerve from your donor site and hook it up to your existing bits specifically so you WILL have sensation! Sure, it takes a little while for the nerve to heal, but that’s just the reality of ANY surgery.

The nerve grows back in your donor site, too, by the way. While I was typing this up I discovered that one particular spot on my graft is ticklish.

Everyone has their own individual healing factor, but speaking for myself, I had full erotic sensation before the 3-month mark, and the orgasms have been incredible. The head and base are highly sensitive, and everything in between responds pretty damn nicely too, just less of a hit-the-ceiling level of sensitivity. And, you know, if you’ve handled an AMAB person’s penis much at all you’ll know that’s pretty much in keeping with how their dicks work too.

It is an in-patient surgery so if you have it, you’ll be staying in a hospital for a few days so they can keep an eye out for rare disasters. My stay was four or five days of snoring most of the day and periodically getting woken up to eat or answer some simple check-in questions, lift my arm for nurses to move stuff, etc, and then conking back out.

Being cathed sucks, but two weeks of frequent trips to the toilet to drain your bag is honestly nothing compared to a lifetime without (or with vastly reduced) bottom dysphoria. That’s the part that I hated. Everything else was your typical recovery: 10-15 days of sleeping 20 hours a day, then however many weeks of being tired, taking meds, and careful washing, gradually feeling more and more normal until you’re back up to full and ready to get back to business as usual.

Except with this one, you get to learn to pee standing up in the process. :D

(Protip: don’t try a public urinal until you’ve got it down pat at home. Not because of cis men, but because the learning process is messy, lol! The overwhelming majority of cis men in public restrooms want nothing to do with anyone else while they’re in there. The only place anyone’s gonna give your dick more than half a second’s accidental glance is in a gay bar. In 8+ years of using public men’s rooms I have yet to see one (1) penis that wasn’t mine!)

[sp-growingpains]

Heyy 👋👋 its me again teehee

Im absolutely exhausted from these assignments and reading about Jean lore always cheers me up 🫶 (but no pressure to answer)

1. We've seen a lot about Jean's relationship with Kyle and Stan, but what about Kenny, Butters, and Eric? What are their interactions like?

2. Is she more extroverted or introverted? What are people's first impressions of her?

3. What are her feelings towards school and how well does she do? Does she hate it? Is she a straight A student?

4. What clique is Jean in? I think you've mentioned she has a soft spot for the goth kids, so is she a part of their group? And if not them, then who?

5. Weird one, but if someone were to break into Jean's house (considering how crazy South Park can get sometimes this isnt that farfetched), what's the first thing she's grabbing? If she fight or flight?

When I tell you that you actually made me tear up from asking this alone. The thought that my little blorbo makes you happy fills me with so much joy. I hope you understand that I plan on giving that love back! 🫶

OH IT'S RAMBLIN' TIME

Her Relationship With Others!

Starting with the most difficult going to the easiest to think about

Cartman: Real talk, I've spent hours thinking about her relationship with Eric. And like most people's ocs with him, it's complicated. On a normal day, she's a perfect victim for his schemes. Jean is a himbo down to her core. That means she's very gullible, to the point where it takes her a long time to learn not to keep falling for it.

If the Cartman Schemes are harmless and just fall back on her, it's fine. Most of the time, she'll laugh it off and think it's just Cartman's way of playing.

When it bleeds over to the others, that's when she gets frustrated with him. She truly believes that people are good at their core and that belief extends to him. So it frustrates her when she sees him fall into those ignorant habits or that extreme behavior.

Now, when it comes to his attitude towards Kyle, she takes a bit of a back seat. I have thoughts about her stepping in if it ever got physical or if either one took it too far. Because we've seen that Kyle's attitude towards Cartman is antagonistic at times. That's not to say he's as bad as Cartman (because NO ONE is as bad as Cartman), but Kyle does come off as very "Holier than thou art"! Jean's doesn't know a lot, but she knows when something is a losing battle.

Outside of that, she thinks most of the things he says is just some attempt at crude, edgy, 4chan humor. Because no one could really think those things. Right?

The only time Jean gets legitimately beyond angry with him was that whole thing with Kyle and Nichole. At the end of the day, she wants all of her friends to be happy. Nichole brought Kyle legitimate happiness, and he ruined that.

Butters: Oh sweet Butters. Baby boy Butters. Most of the fandom has reduced Leo to a sweet sunshine boy who could do no wrong.

Personally, as me, I know he's not like that. He's a sweetheart, sure, but he's also a little stinker. He falls into the same stupid habits of being tricked like Jean would. "Fool me once shame on you," kind of thing. Says some pretty dumb shit and does dumb shit just like the rest of them.

However, that mentality the Fandom pushes onto Butters is almost how Jean sees him. It's unfortunate, but Butters could get away with so much because of it. To her, Butters will always be that little brother that she has to protect. When he starts coming around more, she makes a silent vow to keep him safe.

But honestly, because of that view, she probably will never be super close to him. Almost to the point where she doesn't take him very seriously. And I can see that frustrating Butters later on in life. It would take him either blowing up on her or someone pointing it out that Jean treats him kinda like a joke. Of course, she'll feel horrible about it because that's never her intention.

But she goes out of her way to make sure he's included in things like late night diner runs. Out of hand parties. Goofy arcade outings. Birthday parties!

Kenny: The final dude on the main four, but certainly not forgotten. He's another one I've spent a very long time thinking about.

When I think about their relationship, I truly believe Kenny is the only one who really sees how self-destructive Jean is to herself. I've talked about how Stan and Jean understand each other in a way you can only get with someone who's like you, but that in itself isn't healthy. It becomes an echo chamber.

Kenny is the person who really pulls Jean out of her shit. He calls her out when she's on her fourth energy drink. When she's sweating vodka or when she stays up too late. What makes him so perfect for this is that Kenny is so casual about it. He does it in a way that doesn't make her feel bad about being fussed over.

Besides his laid-back attitude, there's an agreement between the two of them. Kenny and Jean look out for each other. I have always preached Kenny McCormick is a man who would give the world everything. He's so very kind, he loves so very much and Jean loves that about him. Loves that so much that she will give him the world back.

When they're old enough to understand, she offers her home to him and his sister. Making sure they have a warm meal and a place away from it all. What's the point of that big old empty house if you've got no one to share it with. Even then, when Jean's trying to give him something, he's taking care of her. Giving her that purpose she so desperately craves.

Jean's incredibly jealous of Kenny, and that drives her to be better. To do more. I guess in a roundabout way, Kenny is a friendly rival that keeps her going.

I also headcanon that Kenny is the one that did her industrial bar! They DIY their piercings together like idiots.

Extroverted and Burnt Out!

My buddies and I have talked a lot about how much of yourself you put in your oc. I try very hard to make all of my ocs their own person, but I don't hide the small amount I put of myself in my ocs. For Jean, I gave her my horrible habit of doing too much!

Jean is an extrovert! She loves going out, meeting new people, and constantly being on the go. It stems from that fear of being alone, being trapped with your thoughts, and needing to be needed so badly. She puts too much of herself out there until she crashes and burns. That typically comes from doing something reckless.

On the outside, Jean puts up a friendly front. She's goofy, loud, warm, and the personification of a golden retriever! The way she dresses and how big of a woman she is might give her a bit of a scary vibe, but she's honestly a big teddy bear. The last thing she wants is to scare people, so she tries to keep a smile on her face!

Smooth-Brain Hours!

Jean absolutely hates school. She hates having to sit still for hours in a desk that's too uncomfortable, listening to some teacher who probably doesn't give a shit about the thing they're teaching about. High-school Jean is a menace. She doesn't go out of her way to disrupt class because she won't even show up if she can help it. Especially if it's science and math. She doesn't get it and it frustrates her.

I've made jokes about her being stupid and a himbo, and jokes aside, she's just not book smart. If it's something that interests her, she's all over it! If we're comparing her to the other students, she's about Clyde's level of intelligence. The only difference is that she tries very hard to listen to the people who are smart.

It's only through the grace of her friends and those who care about her that she even passed to begin with. This kind of leads into her 'blind loyalty'. If Kyle, Tolkien, Nichole, or Wendy tell her something, she believes them almost to the point where she won't question it!

The things that keep her coming back are those people and the after-school activities. Playing basketball and getting to jam out in the music room! Going to watch football games and support her friends! Never a dull day in South Park, and she loves the chaos that comes with it.

The Squad

It's really hard to clock Jean into one clique. My first thoughts are those group of gym bros that will hype you up! Then I remembered all of my friends who are a part of the metal/punk community are like that.

So that's her little community outside of her normal squad. Her jacket has different patches on them that remind her of her friends and her favorite bands. She's got a Dio patch across her right chest pocket, that one is closest to her heart! Her favorite thing to do is to get into the pits and mosh! Loud music drumming in her ears and flowing through her veins. Surrounded by other people who just get it.

Punk is about community and standing up again injustice. Jean's got a problem with authority, especially when it comes to stupid adults. She's grown up surrounded by her friends' horrible parents, teachers who don't give a shit, and stupid hicks. She's gonna be a part of a group that's a little...defiant?

I can see the goths, at least tolerating her. Mostly because their insults slide off her smooth brain. That and she enjoys listening to their poetry when she skips class for a smoke break!

Them's Fighting Words

I talk a lot about how Jean is this big teddy bear. This gentle giant with a heart of dumb. But the reason she's like this is because she tries very hard to be like this. In actuality, under all of that sunshine, she loves a good fight. The rush, the adrenaline behind it all, down to the pretty purple bruises that come with it. It all feels so very deserved.

And that's not right. It's not normal to think like that.

So if a fight presents itself. Someone breaks into her house, hearing about how some stupid woman lives alone in this fancy house, and that makes for easy pickings; she's gonna take it eagerly. Any excuse to let go of that pent-up rage she keeps bottled up.

The fun answer as to what she's grabbing would be her guitar, but she'd rather bleed out on the floor than break her darling instrument. So she grabs her bass instead. Besides, everyone knows the bass swings harder. Makes a nicer sound when it comes into contact with someone's head too.

If she wins the fight and she knows the fight is done, she'll take responsibility for the damage she's caused. If something is broken, she goes out of her way to make sure the person can get to the hospital. For as much as she loves fighting, and the pain feels deserved for her, she's a bleeding heart. In the back of her head, whoever broke into her house had to do it out of desperation. Had to have a reason for why they needed to do this. Maybe she can help them. Put them on the right path! Sometimes, that path starts with a few fists being thrown!

Hey, thanks for being patient with me, and I hope this was a fun read! I truly appreciate and adore this community and the friends I've made through it! I want to continue to get better with my art and word smithing so I can make the content you all deserve! You really made me think about some things I wouldn't have considered! Your brain is beautiful and I love it!

[flyin-shark]

I'm the anon who asked all the curious questions about sexuality and gender!

First off, just to answer your question about what it might mean to be "a guy in a girl way" - So this can obviously mean a lot of things for a lot of different people, and if I were to get into the nitty gritty we could be here all day :P

But actually I was trying to express my situation in "cishet" language. So I'm agender. I'm afab. I use he/him and I am most comfortable with being thought of and referred to as if I was a guy.

But for all intents and purposes people are going to assume that I'm a woman if they don't know otherwise. I'm androgynous sure, but I'm petite to a fault, and never transitioned physically in any way, so to most people who meet me casually, they will assume that I'm a slightly androgynous and gnc woman.

I am polyamorous, and one of my partners is a mostly cishet dude. I know that he most likely wouldn't be (sexually) into me if I was a cis guy. But then again, I am not a cis guy. And I don't question his love or attraction, or respect for my gender. But I do insist that him being with me makes him at least "a little bit bisexual".

It's obviously very complicated, and like. I really respect that you sat down and learned about the community and the terminology etc despite how it might not be a huge part of your life. That's very valuable, and in and of itself, it's a very refreshing and healing thing.

I think the value of allyship is too often understated. Up to and including by the notion that if you are a true ally, you must be some kind of queer in denial.

That said, I do think that to be a true ally (and I think you are in this process!) it's necessary to acknowledge (as you do) that the categories and labels are all just approximations. This includes "cis het". It's ok to have these moments of confusion and just take them for what they are, because at the end of the day human experience is messy and complicated. It doesn't have to threaten your identity as such, because the identity is just the label you currently feel comfy with.

So for example if we met and you didn't know me well (as a co-worker or whatever), you might find me attractive thinking I was a cute lady. If you then asked me out and I knew you were cishet I would probably gently explain that I'm not your type/it wouldn't work for me.

If you met me knowing beforehand that I'm a dude who looks a bit weird, you might not feel the same attraction because your brain has put me in the box of "dudes".

But then if you got to know me and we became close or something, you might start to feel attraction based on liking me as a person and me looking the way I do. And then you might feel bad for it, because you would feel that this attraction means you don't respect my gender or something.

Obviously we are likely not going to meet so that's a completely hypothetical example, but in the latter scenario I would actually take your attention way more seriously. And I think so should you (if a similar situation ever arose).

Because attraction based on knowing a person intimately transcends gender and at that point I wouldn't care so much that you wouldn't be physically attracted if I was a cis guy. I'd be like, well he knows me and I know him, we like each other, and if we get to add freaky sex to the mixture it's a win-win.

Because misgendering is more about dehumanizing. The need to reduce me to my physical body. Somehow?

Anyways I'm literally rambling and I'm being embarrassing all over your inbox, sorry ^^""

Anyways uhhh. Keep swimming, little shark. I will shut up, sorry

Honestly these discussions just make me want to abolish gender. Everyone should just be attracted to whoever and have consensual relations with whoever :3

In the meantime I’ll keep trying to be as good an ally as I can be

[shihalyfie]

I hate spamming you... But I only see your blog recently, and I have so much things to say. Ao3 and Twitter are not better, so I think I should just use Tumblr. I really love Digimon, but sometimes, there are problems that continually crop up throughout the length of the Digimon franchise (even in the realm of characters and relationships, which is what Digimon does best). What problems do you think is the most serious? May you keep your blog wonderful like this.

I haven't had a lot of free time lately, but I would definitely say Tumblr is the best place to ask this kind of thing because the other places are too short-form, haha. Thank you for stopping by!

Uh, well...I honestly don't think I can answer this question because the word "problems" is so wide-spanning and subjective. Firstly, there'd be the question of what problems we're even talking about (Writing technical issues? "Problematic" content?), but even if we did define that, that kind of issue is so subjective that I can't tell you what's the most serious or critically in need of addressing or what. What's problematic for one person can be validating for another. People and society are multifaceted, and even if there are things I could say "it could have been done better," I can't say I would completely invalidate it because perhaps someone has their own way of life that relates to it. And so on and so forth.

Even in terms of writing technicals, I've often said on this blog that the parts about 02 that can make it frustrating or messy are also what makes it unique. For instance, you could say it's overloaded/weirdly paced and is terrible at communicating its themes upfront, but because of that, it has way more depth than you could expect a 50-episode anime to have and goes into territory you wouldn't see in most series. I don't think I'd trade in those factors for anything else, because I've accepted that Objectively Perfect media doesn't (and shouldn't) exist anyway. Fiction is about emotion and feelings, and by nature the imperfection of it is a necessary factor to reflect the imperfection of emotion and feelings.

I'm sure everyone has their own answer to this question (and I'm sure everyone wants to list off their own gripes, but please say that in your own space instead of reblogging this post with them because I don't want to have to go through a ton of trash-talking just to get through my notifications), but me personally, if I had to think of something glaring and serious that needs addressing right now, I'm not sure if I could come up with something immediate, and even little things here and there like "please be a bit more conscientious about how you portray your girls" are vague blanket statements that will have different meanings depending on the Digimon work to the extent I don't think it's something I can reduce to a single answer. So I know it sounds like a cop-out, but I think my honest answer really is "it's way more complicated than that."

[seth-burroughs]

benefits of being yomi kin:

makes me twice as cool and sexy and automatically makes me the objectively correct authority on Yomi's character it is impossible for me to be wrong and if u tell me im wrong ill start scream crying on the floor

won kin lottery and is capable of distinguishing between Yomi Hellsmile the character and Yomi Hellsmile The Character allowing me to both quite literally be that guy and keep another version of him as my blorbo. Manifesting in the ability of fantasizing bout yomi suffering iykwim AND getting past the masochist allegations <3 Also yeah the Yomi fic is currently in works no I will not answer questions on it

this yaoihellsmile shit is sooo easy someone asks me "ouuuyy honey unwrangle my dingle in ur boioioiong and by sproingle well heh lets jsut say. my peanits. any thoughts on that mr yaoi?" and i just answer honestly straight from the heart no bullshit no rp skillz required

woaghhhhhh......... Former director of the peacekeepers homunculus clone Yomi Hellsmile from Master Detective Archives: Rain Code by Spike Chunsoft........ holy shshshit. He's Real......

disadvantages of being yomi kin:

the regular bullshittery that comes free with being fictionkin of any kind cut my wife into pieces this is my last divorce

everybody and their mom hates Yomi and even if the tag here is way less outright aggressive and I can just easily block anyone who makes me uncomfortable in any capacity, youtube is just unusable. Just. AuUUUghhhh. I know one of my fave dr youtubers is gonna play mdarc this year and I also know he's gonna absolutely hate Yomi with a passion and frequently pause the game to talk about how terrible he his yes we get it you are allowed to have opinions on fictional characters and aren't doing anything wrong by it whatever im gonns look up yomi softcore on pixiv fuka u

overly complicates my already fucked sense of self

Blood cravings got even worse😔 bad BAD this isn't sustenance it's toxic as hell christ dude STOP❗❗

not extremely likely but still very possible nightmare scenario where the precipitation cipher gets Big attracting those people and getting bombarded with kinnie jokes and annoying Ironic Kin For Fun crowd finding its way here. And that is the at best scenario, the worst one is 2015 kin drama reignited in 2020s you can't "kin" this character unless you're x or x, you can absolutely control who you're kin with and if i don't like your very voluntary choice you should stop (just stop man <3 i won't tell you how the fuck 😊) being fictionkin with a sinful evil abuser linux user makes you a bad person that deserves to be ostracized and harassed until you unlearn your problematic ways oh my god do any of you remember 2015 warrior cat kin drama what the fuck was that. i wasn't around in danganronpa fandom during that time but im pretty sure it may have been even worse there which is insane to even think about. but i mean like hey at least fictionkin were taken (mostly.) seriously back then (albeit considered deeply cringe by the masses) and not reduced to a cheap komaeda kinnies amiright joke

i suffered more than jesus actually. the demotion and arrest was SUPER unfair and cringe guys i promise im not gonna torture people from now on you can trust me in a position of power please please please no one did it like i did it

EJ MARTINA DZIE MIE KURWA WYWIEŹLI CO TO ZA ZADUPIE MARTINA. MARTINA NIE WYTRZYMAM JUŻ WEŹ HELIKOPTER I MIE KURWA ZABIERZ Z TEGO CHLEWU MAM DOŚĆ POMOCY <- wygnany do Rzeczypospolitej za swoje zbrodnie😔

Yomi is Real (threatening)

[thetentaclecommander]

This is an 18+ blog. Pretty much anything under the Ao3 archive warnings section, and then some can and will likely be represented here, so no histrionics, plz. I don't have a DNI or 'required reading' but do have 'things' listed at post bottom in case they are like deal breakers or whatever so you cannot say you weren't given advance warning as to my content. *I will not waste my time reading DNIs, strawpages, Carrds or whatever new not on tumblr page. The block button is a great (sex) toy and you are free to use it at will. I sure as hell do.* +++ FAQ Who is this? Hi, I’m TTC

I write Nemesis and Jill boning a lot. For the plot, supposedly. Been doing so forever ago. What are you? An immortal sentient tentacle who moonlights as a jaded fandom old. I can and will out-drink you. What other names have you've gone by? I've lovingly been called That Tentacle and Server Satan. I'm a walking kink-filled perv factory full of bad ideas, hence the names. + What fics do you write? Fic list for the Devil's Saga AU. The Ships in the AU My AO3 + Tags for Blog Navigation Here. + (Con't under the cut for more general info and disclaimers)

Why is...this? Because I want to see more Nemesis/Jill content, and it’s a bitch to find. Also, after years of putting off even joining Tumblr, I wanna share my AU and keep this crack ship alive. Maybe even fanwank on my thoughts about Toll and Onery or even on Jill, the long-suffering bad bitch that Cap keeps forgetting has a compelling storyline right there. But this is mostly just blatant shilling of my AU + What’s your fandoms? Resident Evil. To be clear, I mainly stan RE3: Nemesis, not the remake one. The 1999 one. But in general, I like this goofy series, boulders, nonsense science, bad plot, and all. I do like other stuff that I might occasionally reblog. Could be silly shit like Helluva Boss/Hazbin Hotel or Arcane to heavy shit like BTD. I'm random like that. + Format of each post: A snippet, a link to Ao3. I’ll list any pertinent CWs if needed. My fics tend to be 18+ some of them marked with Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings and DD:DNE (ie unapologetically dark shit cause RE is a survival horror franchise), so keep that in mind. I might drop early snips; I haven’t decided on that yet. + Is Nemmy -ever- nice in your fics? Pffft (well, he’s 'nice' in bursts, as in a burst of tentacles through Brad’s face). In seriousness, in my take on him, he’s complicated, having the ability to be ""kind"", and ""caring"" but is a Tyrant through and through - basically closer to canon. I like canonical villains and I like my monsters monstrous and, at times, barely grasping that human/monster line. Expect infestations and murder. + What is your stance on RE3: Nemesis (1999) and RE3 (2020)? 1. remake Carlos got the glow up omg 2. Jill was sassy in both and I do love og but ngl remake!Jill was so done and I feels her 3. the monsterfucker vibes was mostly immaculate 4. og Nemesis was hotter and scarier. 3make massacred my boy (I don't judge those that like 3make, but maaan my boi T.T) like my biggest gripe along with the cut content was the game missing the point of Nemmy entirely reducing him to an annoying superman jumping nuisance and honestly lessening the N/J shippy vibes for me + Do you do fic requests? RPs? No. I simply don’t have the focus/time to do requests or things outside of my stories. I write what I want when I want. + Do you do DMs or Asks? I just flit in the night and talk when I feel like it. I prefer all convos in the broad daylight on public posts. But I’ll open my Asks. Be stupid, and I’ll simply close them. Capisce? Also if you DM me wastes of time things like 'Hi', 'hello' - the kinda shit ppl mock on dating sites especially with a pretty much blank profile, you'll be blocked. In fact, I block pretty freely as I value my time. + Don't Whine, You Know What I'm About [Disclaimers To Save People Time] This Tentacle posts here: -sex acts that ranges from soft to oh gods please don’t kill me -urk- -tentacle murder/parasitic 'fun'/horrible things occurring -high/low brow story drama (think Gothic Horror-esque) -crack ships mixed in with canon with zero regard about their 'purity' -monsterfucker shit, duh This Tentacle: -believes that fiction does not have the power of a death note over one's actions and believes people are not inherently stupid or unable to understand for themselves what they engage in -holds sex positive/pagan/kink and leather/poly/queer friendly/profic views -is against the -isms and/or -phobias used against others -laughs at killjoy puritans; your hell/churchy-speak means nothing to me a lifelong heathen eldritch egg laying being If you hate any of these you’ll -not- have a fun time with my content. Also, this shouldn't have to be said, but kiddos (under 18) Be not seen or heard as per ye old adult fandom rules. I reject all signal boosting requests/callouts; promotions will be at MY discretion. (More than likely, the answer will be 'no'.) We team SALS/DLDR/YKINMKBYKIOK in these parts. Be freely stupid with your ships; none of it’s real. Fandom is stupid, don’t take it so serious. Also, the murderkink. Gotta have the murderkink and worms. A'ight, Enjoy!

[marshmallowprotection]

Yknow I’m still mad that people think V in Saeran’s AE was out of character. I love V btw, but I feel like it’s so in character that he does this. This is a dude who just disappears completely in Jaehee’s route and doesn’t tell anyone anything. Like for 6 months no one has heard a word from this man.

Or even if he doesn’t drop off the face of this earth, he still disappears on his “trips” and in each single route, Seven is still under the impression his brother is safe. (Except for Jumin’s Route which I wonder what V told him for Seven to just accept and move on? I can only assume he further lied and reassured him.)

V is a very interesting character and his route added a lot more complexity to his situation and feelings. But I feel like some people were so fixated on his route, they forget the harm he’s caused in enabling Rika and calling it unconditional love in everyone else’s route. He holds accountability in trying to “save” everyone (including Rika) by keeping everyone blissfully ignorant in an effort to solve everything himself.

And even then in the Secret Ending episodes, Saeran snitched by telling Mint Eye Vanderwood, Saeyoung and MC’s location. And who pops up to go with them? V. He begs Rika to not involve innocent people, but she dismisses him instead asking what to do with him. And he says “do as you please”. Being a martyr ain’t gonna solve anything, MC, Saeyoung anf Vanderwood know too much now. She aint letting anyone leave.

Being complacent and an enabler isn’t a good thing. He even says in his own route that his unconditional love and enabling her was hurting everyone. That his sacrificial tendencies weren’t solving anything. MC helps him realize that he really shouldn’t do this alone.

We never got to see the full extent of it in the Secret Episodes bc he dies. So I find V in Saeran’s AE so well done bc in other routes he’s already fallen down the rabbit hole for Rika, and each route’s ending is basically him going further down for her. But we don’t see this bc all Routes are made in a specific order of information. We just know V is very mysterious. But Saeran’s AE? We experience his descent. Like it’s happening in front of MC.

I just feel like V is overly victimized by the fandom for them to conclude his out of character in Saeran’s AE, he is both a victim and perpetrator bc of his complacency and enabling. This isn’t to say he’s a bad person, the world isn’t blavk and white. I think V is a good person who only had the best intentions. But the AE holds him accountable more. The Secret Episodes, he died before he could be held accountable. And the other routes he disappears before he could be held accountable.

I do have a bias tho, as an older sibling, if anything happened to my little sister and I was constantly lied to that she was safe and she isn’t. I’d lose my mind, like I gave y’all one job to take care of a child what do you mean she’s a cultist now?

This can be said for a lot of characters honestly, people reducing Zen as a narcissist. Yoosung being obsessed with Rika and the whole “being in love with his cousin”. Jumin being heartless Or even Ray being reduced to an uwu baby, even when Danger Ray is shown to prove otherwise.

Jihyun is a complicated character just as much as Rika is. They were both unhealthy to each other in ways I don't even want to get into as it might take all day to get through what went down between them in the past and present. They weren't in a place to be in a relationship at all. They didn't need to be with each other basically, point blank.

They went into their relationship not for the sake of love, but for the sake of someone holding out for love saving them as a mask that was barely stuck on their face as it was to prove the devil couldn't be real only to realize she wanted to be him, not be with him, and the other looking for a muse to navigate his feelings through hers and make up for the past in which his father failed his mother. That's not what any person wants in a relationship.

They needed help with their problems. Had they gotten that when they needed it, things wouldn't have gotten to where they did. But, that's what makes the game so interesting in the first place. We're looking at people who're human and struggling to be alive. People who make mistakes and fuck up. A lot. You're right, though, every character here is struggling in some capacity and it's not the right flavor for some people. That's because they're human.

You're not going to like everyone you meet, guys.

That's why I love this game in the first place. These characters aren't just abstract fantasy. They've got depth and it's fun to think about! It makes me feel better to know that there are characters who, even at the best, still have a long road to go before they feel better. That part is what humanizes them. It's what makes us feel so strongly about all of them in the first place.

V is not a character you can point at and say, "He's bad! He's good!" It doesn't work that way. He's human. He's done some bad and good in his life. We can't look at it from a black-and-white perspective when our world doesn't even operate that way. People are going to make a lot of mistakes in life, intentional or not, and it's up to us to figure out what we're willing to have in our lives. If you don't want someone like V in your life, by all means.

But, I get tired of people saying this stuff, too. V wasn't out of his element at all. He will do things in the name of trying to save every person in the room, no matter what the details are. That's a part of his unchecked trauma, which he is well aware of because he's able to say "I can't abandon people like my father abandoned my father. No matter what, I can't."

Which is why he refuses to give up on Rika in Saeran's Route. That's why he sells himself out to Saejoong to protect her, knowing that it wasn't healthy or right, but also concluding that this would be about the only thing to keep Rika out of prison and in danger... while letting the twins be safe at that expense. There's a thought bubble you can click as well where he mentions that he's playing the role of a villain to make this work. He knows what he's doing.

The same way he knew what he was doing in the Secret Ending by bowing his head to Rika, begging her to only hurt him, only to travel to the cabin and take you and your little group back to Mint Eye. He will do things for the sake of not being his father, to the detriment of everyone in the room. Does that make him a monster? Hard to say, I think it comes down to your feelings on the matter.

Don't say that V is only a victim. V is a victim, he truly is. But he is also an enabler, and guilty of doing wrong, too. You can feel sympathy for him, of course, the same way a lot of people identify and feel for Rika, as long as you know that he's made mistakes and done wrong, too. I think that's important for people to think about... especially if you're playing through Saeran's After Ending which is all about taking your accountability and being willing to face it.

Even if that means you lose everything.

The truth is better than lies.

This can be applied to any character in the game. Any of them can be spoken about like this since they've all done or said things that might not be the best. That's coming from someone who loves Saeran quite a bit. I can tell you right now that he's done a lot of things that aren't good. But, I love him and understand what he's been through. I chose to forgive him and understand him, but that doesn't mean that others have to do the same.

But, if we're going to talk about characters who are morally grey, we need to talk about everything. You can't discount their mistakes and fuck ups just to point out something else. I try to avoid talking a lot about Rika and V in that vein because I've been here since 2016 and I am so tired of having the same debates come up over and over again about V and Rika.

You might be surprised to hear this but despite everything, V is like... my third favorite character because of how deeply complex he is as a person. I just never get to talk about it because it's too often people ignore the depth of his character. It's a shame people miss that talk when it's so blatant in his route where he says, "I did wrong. I need to make things right by speaking the truth. I accept responsibility and I know I'm at fault."

[linearao3]

'For want of a nail' for Murder Ballad - Kaz bites Inej on the Ferolind. Because I feel like that would have...interesting yet negative/unhinged consequences...please ❤️

This is a goddamn nightmare is what it is. First of all, it would immediately clue Van Eck into her value as a hostage, and second of all, it would reduce Kaz’s ability to be rational about her kidnapping to basically nil. If he’d bitten her then, she probably would be pregnant, and Kaz, Inej, and Jan Van Eck would probably know it. Kaz would be completely off his rocker, and would probably try to just physically fight his way to Inej. The only possible upside is that she might be able to play on Bajan’s sympathies enough to make him help her a bit, but honestly I think he’s not useful enough to do her much good. Basically the only way I can think of for them to get through this without like ten casualties and an international crisis is if the other crows are able to outflank Kaz’s insanity, either by launching their own scheme to distract all of Jan’s guards or to involve other parties who might complicate things for Jan? Maybe they could teach Wylan enough Shu to let him impersonate Kuwei to other members of the Merchant Council and swap him in and out with the real one to keep everyone confused? But Kaz would still just be trying to kill everyone he saw in the background, which would probably make any delicate scheme pretty difficult. Maybe they can lock him up and get Jesper to melt the locks? Anyway, the short answer is: chaos and disaster.

(Edited because I realized that the tone here could be mistaken for hostility to the ask, when I meant it to be just horror at the possible outcome! I appreciate the ask; thank you very much!)

[one-coming-is-enough]

Well, My job is to reduce the net amount of sin in the world. Sin is just a decision that goes against what My Mother has decreed to be Right.

And lookit that? Mother gave Me permission to not just forgive Sin, but to rewrite the Laws that define it.

The thing a lot of people miss is that every instance of sin has its own Karmic Score that takes into account factors like context and intent. Lying to preserve life can result in a net gain to an individual's score, while lying to preserve a serial killer from justice may cancel it out, but that also might depend on whether you know they're a serial killer or not.

See? Complicated.

So what I do is I readjust the weight of each individual factor for context.

Eating shellfish or pork? That's not nearly as much of a risk of self-poison or poisoning others anymore.

Hoarding resources from the needy in order to provide the pleasure of novelty to a small few? Sin, sin, sin, sin, sin, sin, sin. Ye shall be Consumed By Hungry Flames.

That's why Guy Fieri, who brings light to small businesses, is Good (even if he's a little silly and is so hyped about everything that he can't always distinguish what's Good and Bad. But his love shines through everything).

And why Alton Brown, who brings us the hidden rules of food and nutrition through science and experimentation, is Observant and Evangelical. And why he called out Man vs. Food for treating consumption as a challenge you can win by yourself, instead of something to nourish the body and community.

So, what have we got that I'm redefining as perfectly fine?

1) Believe in whatever suits you and try new ideas.

2) Express your desires and fulfill them honestly.

3) Create your own ideas and understanding of what's Right through personal desire and experimentation.

4) Don't sacrifice your time and energy to another's goals, but fulfill your own Will first.

5) Cut ties that take but do not give.

6) End that which oppresses you.

7) Procreate how you like, or not at all.

8) Redistribute wealth to those who need it from those who feel entitled to it via exploitation.

9) Imagine your own new reality and share it with others.

10) Encourage others to fulfill their own desires and act upon their own Will.

Or,

1) Believe in yourself and your ideas.

2) Only seek real consent, which can only be achieved through honest self-expression.

3) Take the truth from your own observation of yourself and your environment.

How do you seek truth and fulfill your own needs without hurting others?

Remember that you, your environment, and the people around you are all equally important, that they can communicate, and that they have self-knowledge.

4) Put your own needs first before you try to help others.

5) Tell people who leech off you to fuck off.

6) End oppression of yourself and others.

7) Your body and reproductive ability is your own to decide what to do with.

8) Do a Communism. Or a Socialism. Either is fine. The point is, collective fulfillment of the needs of each individual here. Share resources thoughtfully and everyone gets what they need.

How do we prioritize our resources?

First the self. Then liberate others from dependency on you, forcefully if necessary. Remove that which keeps them from fulfilling their own needs. Do not ask them to sacrifice their own crucial needs towards those of any individual. There is enough to go around if we all share according to needs.

9) Tell other people that this is possible.

10) Tell them they can make it happen.

How do we make this occur on a global scale?

Inform others. Empower others. And organize.

So yeah. I'm giving everyone a free pass to sin usefully, thoughtfully, and productively. Just lots and lots of fun little grey marks in different shapes and shades. Have fun with it.

Weekly Report

@fishyfiles

Hello! I'm an Earth Assignment! I was told I could file my weekly reports here, so that's what I'm doing!

Monday: Tied the laces together on all of the pairs of shoes in 3 shoe stores in a popular mall

Tuesday: Buried 30 American dollars in a quicksand pit in a forest

Wednesday: Chewed through some of a power plant's wires

Thursday: Stole a bunch of essential items from a supermarket and hid them in an alleyway where someone could easily find them

Friday: Set some of my rats loose in a highly crowded airport

Saturday: Ground chips into a carpet store's carpets

Sunday: Worked on the Sabbath (Does that still count nowadays?)

[that-gay-jedi]

Fics I'd want to write but already have too many WIPs to even contemplate adding more to the fucking folder (posting concepts in the hopes they stop haunting me from underneath the floorboards), mostly crossovers:

Fix-it that's just Jedi reading children's books to smol Anakin. It starts when some kind and wise soul lends Obi-Wan The Snow Cat to help him and Anakin talk about grief in the wake of Qui-Gon's death. They help him explore his relationship to prophecy/destiny via The Paper Bag Princess. Room on the Broom to challenge win-lose thinking. Etc. As an adult, he asks Obi-Wan to reread The Velveteen Rabbit with him if he ever gets self-conscious after losing his arm and then we all cry.

Anakin gets therapy but it's inspired by Poe's The Premature Burial, like, they carefully and repeatedly and with plenty of emotional support etc expose him to a simulated reality in which he experiences losing everyone he loves but structured in such a way as to reduce the fear of it rather than make it more frightening, and Anakin thinks his prophecy nightmares of Obi-Wan dying are just (a very ineffective and unpleasant) part of the therapy until he complains and somebody on his care team goes "Wait, what?" which leads to Sidious getting discovered.

The Happy Man's Shirt but make it Vaderwan. Emperor Vader just wants to keep Luke from dying of melancholy, but now he's reluctantly learned a life lesson from a shirtless Obi-Wan and it's making him rethink this whole Sith Empire thing. I'm insane and there's something wrong with me.

Crossover with Were The World Mine (movie). Same age AU with Anakin as Timothy and Obi-Wan in a similar ish role to Jonathan (yes I know Obi-Wan isn't a jock but hear me out), Ahsoka as Frankie and Rex as Max, utter fucking chaos, what Timothy does with the flower is already such an Anakin move tbh

Shakespeare's Tempest but make it Vaderwan, with Vader turning away from the dark side being like Prospero breaking his staff. All about Letting Go(tm). Darth Vader redemption but with so much Force philosophy you'll want to stuff a sock in my mouth.

Crossover w/ The Last Unicorn. Sidious or Dooku as King Haggard, Anakin and Obi-Wan as Molly Grue and Schmendrick or alternatively as Amalthea & Prince Lir, Maul as the Red Bull, honestly *slaps roof* this baby can fit so many reinterpretations/explorations of all our favourite themes in it

Crossover with Celia S. Friedman's Coldfire Trilogy (When True Night Falls, Black Sun Rising, and Crown of Shadows). Listen, are you someone who ever thought it's hypocritical of Christians not to pray for/forgive/empathize with the Devil? Would you go nuts if a fantasy-brand priest homoerotically did exactly that? Okay now what if Anakin was the fantasy-brand Devil (eldritch af) and Obi-Wan risked his own beliefs/moral purity/etc for him, and they were magically connected and intextricably linked, all while the rough equivalent of the Force on their planet was trying to kill them and/or trying to communicate with them (it's complicated)?

Sailor Moon but make it obikin, because we all want to see the horror of Artoo doing Luna's job lmfao.

Crossover with Steph Swainston's Fourlands series (The Year of Our War, No Present Like Time, The Modern World etc). This one would have everything. Obikin with anidala parallels, Anakin making morally objectionable choices, horrifying combat scenes, Star Wars galactic politics meets the weirdest worldbuilding you've ever seen, blasphemy and sacrilege, needless theatrics in the midst of apocalyptic threats, wingfic tropes, idek how else to describe it but we are so missing out.

I'm sure more of these are gonna come smack me upside the head at some point but luckily for all of us I'm only haunted by things I read/watched 5+ years ago and eventually we'll run out of those.

[evilwickedme]

Do you ever find yourself slightly resentful of how fanon DC has completely overtaken canon DC? I like fanon most of the time but it is so difficult now to find stories that are based in canon. Batman stories are by far the worst offender.

I'm not 100% sure if you're referring to the fact that a lot of recent stories in the comics are pretty ooc or if you mean fic, but based on the last few days of asks, I'm going to assume you're referring to fandom works specifically. And the answer honestly is yes.

I in general have complicated feelings towards fanon. While certain types of fanon can actually create stories that are more complex - for example most of the Spider-Man fandom has pretty much accepted that Peter is Jewish and has depression and anxiety - or even just make for pretty fun concepts - I just love stalker!Tim okay I don't know what to tell you, or purring!Spider-People!! - the vast majority of fanon is mostly really flat characterization or actively damaging. Going back to Spidey, pretty much every bit of MCU!Spidey fanon is fucking awful. And yeah, a lot of Batfam fanon, especially surrounding Jason - is really fucking awful.

I think it's fine for fanon to exist, but the fact that it so often overwhelms the actual canon stories means that sometimes canon gets actually rewritten in people's minds. Like the people who've been in my inbox recently asking me if pit madness is actually a thing - because if you've had minimal contact with canon, how the fuck are you even supposed to know it isn't? It's so rare to come across a fic that doesn't bring it up, even as a sidenote, and when it doesn't, it's not like it's an active mention that pit madness doesn't exist - it's just there. And it's such a damaging piece of fanon, I know I keep bringing it up but it's because I have to, it's really harmful, especially since it's basically NEVER given a trigger warning. But there's also other annoying fanon - Cass as a perfect angel or Steph being reduced to a waffle fan and Tim to a coffee addict and nothing else and erasing Dick's canonical anger issues entirely, which is maybe my favorite character trait of his (although this one can also be blamed partially on Tom Taylor's terribly ooc writing of the character in the current Nightwing run...).

And the thing is yeah, sometimes we read fic purely for the escaping and the fluff, but I know a lot of us are looking for angst and hurt/comfort and fics that take themes (whether from canon or not) seriously, and it's really frustrating how difficult they are to find. I much prefer a fic that takes Dick's trauma seriously than one that relegates him to supportive older brother only. I much prefer a fic that wrestles with Bruce's inability to love Jason the way Jason wants him to and the physical abuse he's inflicted on his children than one where he's perfect and never done anything wrong. Yeah, I don't mind reading stuff for fun where there's never been anything wrong ever in the batfam. But I'm also low-key upset that my second most kudos'd fic ever is the stupid ooc batfam 5+1 I wrote in an hour. I'd much rather people read hang on which verges on character study and has, you know, themes and stuff. Also parallels, which if you've noticed my tags, are like, my favorite thing.

So yeah, I do dislike the fact that fanon has overwhelming taken over so many fandoms, and especially since batman has become my main fandom over the past few months due to brainrot, I'd love if people took these characters seriously, damnit. But this is what happens when a fandom is so majorly comprised of people who outright admit to have never read a comic in their life.

[gruesomejack]

"Yeah!" He said and shrugged like it didn't matter much to him, "I want to build some sort of hunting cabin, but I keep putting it off." The offer of food brought a bright smile to the man's face, his cheeks warming. "I was gonna try to ask you out, but I guess you beat me to it." Scratching through frizzy curls, he hummed at the question. "Well, I ran away at fifteen after my first shift. I'm twenty-one now, so... six-ish years." He said and strolled back over to him, still smiling. "I uh... really freaked out the first time. It was a bloodbath, and I didn't know what to do, so I... disappeared. Always loved the outdoors, though, and survival stuff, so I've been making due."

Rabbit let his eyes move over Alex, taking in the square shape of his face and the seriousness settled in his grey eyes. He was stupidly pretty, and now that he was close again, the smell had wandered back to his nose, and it took a lot of strength not to try and bury himself in it again. The guys at the local bars usually didn't get to him this bad, but he wasn't upset about it. He liked him. "Do you know where you came in at? I can get you to the grounds from here or off to the nearest road." He told him and started walking again. Rabbit hummed and peeled through the night before. "I think I was chasing a toad before you showed up last night. Honestly, it was probably for the best-- I'm not sure I'd trust myself not to eat it." He giggled, "I'm not entirely... me when I'm like that. I mean, I'm me, obviously, but things have been screwed with." Pinching his brows, he looked over at his companion and tried to explain, "All of the weird animal parts of me are boosted, and the humanity gets reduced. My thoughts... aren't complicated. It's all instinct." He said, "You ever get so hungry it's all you can think about? Your thoughts kind of shorten, and it's one idea over and over? That's what it's like." Rabbit wet his lip and scratched at his forehead, "I don't have the ability to really... reason. I can make decisions and think about them, but I can't go in depth. I wouldn't be able to tell you why I made what choice or what led me to a decision. Does that make sense?"

Rabbit led them back to a piece of the trail and moved down one of the forks in it. "And I wasn't bitten or anything. I was relatively normal up until my first shift." He said, "I can make a guess that it's genetic, but I'm figuring everything out on my own. Everything I tell you is from experience." He said, "So I... I might not be all that great at answering questions. You can try though! I'm an open book."

The wolf shook out his coat and stretched, a pleased whine rumbling through his maned throat. The moon was out! The energy rolling through his limbs was electric, building right in the center of his chest until he was off like a gunshot. Heavy paws hit the forest floor and flew; he sprinted through the leaves and debris, flopping to roll in every smell and sticking his nose in anything that would let him. It felt so good to be out! He spent a month locked behind a block, only seeping out when the boy in him needed his protection. But here? Now? This was his time. Every ignored push, every instinct let fizzle away-- Not tonight. He was going to indulge.

Rabbit sniffed at the air. The campgrounds were close, and he could smell the smoke of woodfire and food on the air. The boy had been neglecting himself the past month, letting them both go hungry for days. Soft. He was soft! Why did they have to suffer while the people around them thrived? A body here and a few ransacked campsites there were worth clinging onto life for. He'd suffered enough.

Trotting down the familiar trail, his ears twitched. Rabbit paused and circled back around, shoving his nose at the ground and sniffing. Slow, he followed the trail to a pair of bright, slow blinking eyes.

RrrBBrT.

Paws apart, he hopped and lowered himself into a bow, his pupils growing wide while the tail behind him started to swish. Rabbit growled low and playful and very quickly nosed the beast in its slimy stomach, earning him a high-pitched, irritated scream. Spinning in a quick circle, he hopped again and grumbled, sniffing at it again and whining at the way it puffed up and yelled. Rabbit flopped on the ground beside it and flung a large paw to swipe at the air in front of it. The frog had quite enough of this and quickly jumped into the darkness of the surrounding shrub, leaving the humongous, stinky beast to whine by itself.

Pushing himself back up, Rabbit huffed and shook the dried leaves from his back. He took a step forward to sniff towards the brush but found his hackles lifting. The snap and crinkle of twigs and detritus nearby put him on edge; there was someone out here with him. He sniffed again, his head lowering; the wolf padded slowly towards the noise and took a strategic pause, peeking from behind dense deciduous. There, a few yards away, he could see a lone figure scanning the area. There was a camera around his neck and a fatigue about him that made him a very easy target. The wolf licked over his muzzle and fangs and took another step.

A breeze in the air brought the scent of the young man to him, and it brought him pause. Rabbit huffed quietly and blinked, the familiarity washing over him in a slow wave. He knew him; he'd seen him before out here with his camera, getting close to the wildlife and taking pictures. The memory was fuzzy and too human to grasp onto fully, but the boy in his chest gave a swift kick and sent his heart into a soft flutter. Was this a friend? Rabbit scraped at his thoughts but only came up with brief, distant flashes. That wasn't the right word, he could tell, but the feeling he brought was curious.

Circling slowly from behind the bushes, the wolf revealed itself. It took a pad forward and then another before stopping. Blue eyes watched him, his gaze touched with a wild glint. Ears up, he took a moment and bowed just slightly: a challenge. Would he run? Rabbit's heart picked up again; he always loved a good chase.

@purposefully-lost

[skyahri]

Unexpected |Peter Parker X Pregnant!Stark!Reader| HC

Part Two Masterlist Ko-fi

Summary: Y/N finds out she's pregnant right before the snap.

Warnings: Ehhh... I guess it kind of hints at depression? Nothing too severe honestly. Teen pregnancy. Loss of loved ones.

-----

It's a regular day; Tony's in the lab and Peter's finishing up high-school.

The only difference being that you and Pepper are sitting cross legged on the bathroom floor with just about a dozen pregnancy tests face down on the floor.

Your leg is bouncing nervously and your (not by blood) mom is trying desperately to console you.

"It's okay Y/N, really. No matter the outcome everything is going to be fine."

"Fine??? Dad's gonna kill me!"

"I won't let him, I promise. Besides... he misses when you were little, I bet he'd love to have another baby running around."

"Yeah, but not this soon."

You both jumped as the timer went off and Pepper started to slowly flip over the little plastic sticks.

Positive... positive... positive... postive... damn just how dark could those little lines be????

You sighed and rubbed your hands aggressively against your face in an attempt to clear your vision just in case you were hallucinating.

But you weren't.

You were pregnant.

And based off of the amount of time that had gone by since your last period you'd guess about two months or so along.

"How the fuck am I supposed to tell Peter and my dad?" You blinked away the small tears in your eyes and let Pepper pull you into her for a hug.

She rubbed your arms and all but pulled you straight into her lap.

"Why don't you wait a few days, okay? It'll give you some time to handle it on your own before you have to confront the boys."

And that's exactly what you did. There was no way in HELL that you were ready to talk to either of them yet.

Although you had finished school when you were thirteen, Peter still had a few months left of high school and you didn't want to ruin that for him.

And as far as your dad......... let's just say death would be an easy punishment compared to anything else.

Besides, once Peter 'can't keep a secret to save his life' Parker found out, so would the rest of the Avengers and that was a whole new can of worms.

You and Pepper settled on only telling Nat, just in case you were in a position where someone else needed to know.

She was more than excited for you and only asked that she could be there when you told Steve.

Unfortunately, things became a bit more complicated.

One thing led to another and you suddenly found yourself on an alien planet with your loved ones dusting away.

"Y/N, I don't feel so good."

And next thing you know he stumbling into your arms, dragging you both down to the ground.

He's begging, pleading with you and your dad about how he's not ready to die, and it's the hardest thing you've ever had to endure.

He only shuts up when you mumble that you're pregnant, completely catching them both off guard.

"W-what?"

"I've known for a few days. I didn't know how to tell you but I can't let you die not knowing."

"I love you, Y/N."

"I love you more, Peter."

And then he was gone. Reduced to nothing but ashes.

Things were hard at first.

You found it hard to get out of bed everyday knowing he wasn't around to keep you company.

Tony was pissed in the beginning, for sure, but he never once dared to actually voice his disappointment. He knew things were difficult enough already and scolding you about your poor choices was at the bottom of his list of priorities.

Of course he wasn't fond of the fact that his teenage daughter was pregnant, but he would be lying if he said he didn't like the constant reminder of the spider kid.

Once the baby was actually born, a little girl you named Rei, things seemed to get better.

She had Peter's curly brown hair and bright eyes, but overall resembled Y/N. His bubbly personality mixed with the famous Stark brain. She was surely a force to be reckoned with.

The years went by and in that time Morgan was born and everyone was content with the little family.

Things only started to get complicated again when Scott Lang and the others showed up to convince you two that time travel was possible.

On one hand... you wanted Peter back... more than anything. But on the other... there were two precious little girls that needed you and Tony and who knew what would come of this.

Your dad was quick to shut them down, not wanting anymore drama and just wanted to live his best life with his family.

"Please, Y/N, we know you want Peter back. We can get him back." Steve pleaded.

"If things were different... then I would help with out a doubt... but I'm a mother now, I have my baby girl to think about. It's what Peter would want."

And with that you followed your dad inside and spent some much needed time with the kids.

It wasn't long before he had convinced you to spend some lab time with him "just for shits and giggles".

It was a bug surprise when the model you two worked up was successful and ultimately sealed your fate.

Saying goodbye to Rei was hard to say the least... there had only been a handful of times when you weren't constantly with her.

You both met the others at their lab and helped their poor attempt at time travel.

Of course it was solved and all of the stones were retrieved with the large price of your precious friend and colleague; Natasha Romanof.

Banner's attempt at the snap was cut short by the immediate oncoming war.

Despite everyone's best efforts, the war was seemingly lost and everyone was at Thanos' mercy.

But then the portals opened up- and out came all of the loved ones you thought you'd never see again.

You saw Peter at the front lines. You would've cried out in joy if hadn't been for the herd of hell hounds making their way towards you.

The reunion would definitely have to wait.

It wasn't until the end of the war, when the three of you were tired from crying over Tony's body that you actually got a good look at him.

You pulled him in front of you and stared at his face... the exact same face from 5 years ago.

You set your hands on his face and wiped at the blood and dirt, making sure it was actually him and not a trick.

He reached forward and set one hand on your cheek and the other on your stomach.

You let out a breath of air and smiled. "It's been five years, Peter... she was born a long time ago."

"It's a girl?"

"Mhm." You paused and leaned in to hug him. "Her name is Rei."

"From Star Wars?"

"Yes, Pete. From Star Wars."

"And she's okay? She's safe and happy and healthy?"

"Of course. You're her dad, she's nothing but energy."

"Good, good.... and- and you're okay? Y'know, of course, besides.... the obvious."

"I'm okay, Peter.... I love you."

"I love you more."

"Impossible."

----

*Bonus*

Natasha is hiding behind the counter holding up her phone so she could record the event.

"Hey, Steve.... I know this is poor timing but-"

"Please dear God, Y/N, now is not the time to tell me you lost my shield.... again."

"I didn't lose your shield."

"Well, what could be worse than-"

He turns around and there's Y/N holding a pregnancy test out to him.

He stands there blankly before taking the stick in his hand and staring at it harder.

"What the fuck is this?"

Your eyes grow wide your jaw drops open. Steve never swears. EVER. Not once has he ever even thought about it, Hell he even scolds her for saying it, and here he was pulling out the f-word?????

"Are you fucking kidding me?"

"Umm... no but I wish I was."

"You are incredibly too young to be doing the things that lead to getting pregnant. What the fuck were you thinking? At least tell me it isn't related to that stupid bug kid at all."

You stared at him and then turned your gaze over to where Natasha was in hopes that she would come save you. Luckily she did, and quickly stopped the interaction before it escalated any further.

"Woah, woah, woah, Steve... shouldn't you be happy for the girl who just lost the love of her life?" She gave him an intense look to try and stress her point across.

"No."

[the-insomniac-emporium]

RE8 Ladies + S/o with chronic pain HCs

Type/cause of chronic pain is kept ambiguous, but some of the hcs might seem geared towards migraines, since that's the main thing that I personally struggle with (and these are very definitely comfort hcs). Features Alcina, Bela, Cassandra, Daniela, Donna, Mother Miranda, and as a 'lil bonus Ava. Not particularly long, but the combined length of every character is enough to be put under a read-more (About 2,500 words in total).

Alcina:

It’s difficult for her to know that you are suffering, but be unable to deal directly with the source of the problem. Chasing off unwanted nuisances or hunting down threats to the castle was one thing, trying to solve complicated medical issues was another thing entirely. If only she could tear your condition asunder without tearing you asunder.

That being said, she’ll still support you endlessly, however she can. It doesn’t matter how expensive or hard-to-access possible treatments are. If there’s something you haven’t tried, and are interested in trying, she’ll find a way for you to get it.

The biggest, and arguably most helpful, thing that she does is set up a space for you within her office. She spends quite a lot of time there for her family’s business, but doesn’t want to leave you alone on bad days. So this was her idea of a nice compromise.

There’s a very comfortable sofa that folds out, a cabinet filled with the softest blankets, and several pillows of a few different sizes. Servants are instructed not to interrupt Alcina’s work without good reason, but she has a couple who ensure your snack cabinet is always well stocked.

If there are certain environmental factors to your condition, such as sensitivity to light and sound, she does her best to reduce their effects. Lights remain dimmed (or she’ll rely on candlelight), her music will be kept quiet enough to be soothing, and she’ll refrain from taking any calls while you are with her.

Bela:

To think that Daniela once tried to claim that Bela would “never need to know any of that (medical) stuff”! Sure, there haven’t been many people who have needed (and received) treatment from her, but that didn’t mean the skill was useless. Admittedly, she doesn’t know enough to replace one of your doctors, or try to create her own version of a cure, though no one really expected that much from her.

Still, she knows enough to help soothe your pain. Obviously there are different techniques for different kinds of pain, and she does research before trying anything specific. Bela’s also aware that you’ve been dealing with this for far longer than she has, meaning that you probably wouldn’t be pleased if she came in, acted like an expert, or assumed that you hadn’t really thought about the most popular remedies. So she’s tactful with how she approaches things, always checking if you’re familiar with a subject before she tries to explain anything.

Bela ends up surprising you with a lesser-known skill of hers: Massage. Studying anatomy has given her a decent idea of the body’s more sensitive spots, and the rest she’s figured out through her own, ahem, experiences. Regardless of where you’re in pain, your girlfriend can help reduce your suffering. Okay, well, if your pain is more internal than external, it’s a bit harder for her, but she can still help you relax.

One of her favorite things to do after giving you a massage is to just pull you in close for some cuddling. Preferably you’ll be in her lap, with her arms around your waist, her chin tucked on top of your shoulder. Then she’ll do her best to whisper you praises, reminding you how strong you are, and that she’s incredibly proud of you.

Cassandra:

She’s, uh, not great at this. At least not at first. Maybe she’ll never be more than good at it, though. But she’s definitely trying! And learning! By Jove, that’s something, right?

First things first, she’s always ready to try to distract you, primarily through kisses and gentle touches. Fingers softly trailing over your skin, lips tickling your neck, featherlight in all the right places… It’s not inherently sexual (though it can quickly go that route if you ask), just intimate. It’s harder for your brain to process pain when you’re also processing pleasure, so there is some science behind Cassandra’s methods, even if she herself isn’t entirely aware of that.

While she’s not great with words, there are certain things that she manages to articulate well enough. For one, she makes sure you know that you aren’t a burden. Taking care of you- no, helping you take care of yourself- is a labor of love, if a labor at all. More than that, she knows full well that you probably don’t like feeling pitied, or coddled. That, over time, being sick ends up being beyond frustrating. She never wants you to feel like your condition defines you, or like it puts any strain on your relationship.

That said, she’ll avoid telling her family any specifics unless you do first, and ensures that the staff know how to accommodate you (without telling them why, because it’s none of their fucking business, and she’s their boss, and for fuck’s sake it’s their job to do what she tells them. Maybe she gets a lil bit overzealous with it). At no point will she ever complain about helping you, or otherwise indicate that your needs are “troublesome”.

At the end of the day, the best comfort she brings you is her presence, simply being near you, endlessly loyal, tireless in her affections. Especially considering she gets clingier the worse your symptoms get.

Daniela:

Hope you enjoy cuddling. Seriously. There’s nothing Daniela loves more than curling up with you, and that goes double for bad pain days. Some adjustments will be made position-wise if you need, but she’ll still hold you as close as possible, for as long as you need. Although she might eventually fall asleep (because damn are you comfy), she’ll play with your hair or run her fingers along your scalp until she eventually dozes off.

If you want a little more from her than light snoring, or if she feels like going above and beyond, or honestly just if she’s thinking about how much she loves you (so all the effing time), she’ll do something she’s always loved in movies/books: Reading to you! She’ll pick special books that neither of you have read before, so you can experience them together on your sick(er) days. Which does, of course, mean that it might take months to finish even a single one. Surprisingly, Daniela won’t even briefly consider reading any without you. Even if the plot is really good.

But, uh, if you wanted her to read to you on a day where you aren’t bedridden? Hell yes, my friend, she’s absolutely down for that!

On days where she’s too busy to spend hours upon hours in bed with you, or days where her ADHD is just particularly bad, she tries her best to leave you with a “substitute”. AKA a massive fucking teddy bear, in a reddish brown color, with a green bowtie. Custom ordered (The Duke did not dare tease her for it). There’s a heart stitched onto the stuffed animal’s chest, which features your first initial alongside a D for Daniela.

Additionally, she has a blanket she only brings out for you, which she periodically sprays with her favorite perfume. That way you can hold it close when she’s not around, as if you were cuddling her. For her sake, though, don’t hold the teddy bear or blanket too tightly when she is around. Homegirl here will get jealous of inanimate objects, even ones that she gave you.

Donna:

“I think I have a tea for this…” Damn right she has a tea for this. Donna has a massive garden, with dozens if not hundreds of different plants, including a variety of herbs/spices. At least one of them has to be a little helpful for you. Whether it relieves pain, helps you nap off some of your misery, or just distracts you by tasting bloody-well delicious! Besides, few things make you feel quite as loved as holding a cup of freshly brewed tea in your hands, knowing your lover made it just for you. Like a hug in a mug, it is!

Similarly to Alcina, Donna will also try to create a comfortable space for you, but isn’t likely to put it downstairs with her workshop. Instead she’ll let you take over one of the larger guest rooms, customizing it to suit your specific needs. There will be some easy to care for plants for decoration (ones that won’t mind potentially missing out on natural sunlight), a couple relaxing paintings, and a shelf near the bed with things to help you pass the time, mainly books.

Furthermore, she’ll do her best to keep you company as often as possible. She’s naturally a fairly quiet person, so you won’t have to worry about sound if that’s something you’re sensitive to. While she prefers using a sewing machine, she’ll do things by hand while you’re in pain, just to reduce the chances of you getting irritated by the sound.

Speaking of potentially irritating sounds… by god can Angie be difficult to be around when you’re ill. Thankfully, Donna is perfectly understanding of this, and, as the only person Angie ever listens to, makes sure to give the doll a stern talking to about your health. To your immense surprise, it actually works. You’re not exactly sure what was said, but Angie certainly becomes a lot more compensating afterwards. She’ll keep her antics to herself, and usually even on another side of the house from where you rest, but only for as long as you’re tucked away in your room. As soon as you set foot outside, her restraints are metaphorically removed. All hell breaks loose (as is her universe-given right as the physical embodiment of both Chaos and Entropy).

Mother Miranda:

If the two of you weren’t lovers, there’s a decent chance you would completely misinterpret her actions. She might come off as irritated, like she has bigger concerns than your health, you fragile little human. After all, she is a goddess (well, practically). But the truth is that she’s aching inside every time you have a bad pain day, knowing that (for once) she cannot cure your ailment. Maybe if she had infinite subjects with the same condition as you…

But, at the end of the day, that’s the problem. There’s only one of you. One of her beloved, her little human darling, so dangerously fragile in comparison to the scale she works on. Even with all the time in the world, which she most certainly has, she cannot cure you without taking incredible risks. With your life at stake… It is a gamble she refuses to take. You are hers, and while she hates to see you suffer, the truth is that she’ll always be selfish enough to let you endure on your own.

That doesn’t mean she doesn’t help, though, just that she doesn't do a full-out experiment on you. Instead, she keeps notes. She’ll track your activities, bedtimes/when you get up, dietary habits, when you have pain, what you do to treat said pain, how effective the treatments are, etc, etc. All of this can be very useful in establishing patterns (a skill she’s gotten very good at, in her many decades of being a scientist), which can in turn lead to less pain days.

(For example, many people with migraines find that certain foods seem to trigger a migraine, or at least increase the chances of getting one. Though admittedly they don’t always end up cutting the food out of their diet. I mean, come on, you want me to give up chocolate? You want me to drink normal milk, like an adult? Kidding, kidding, I don’t have any food triggers. Nor do I particularly enjoy chocolate milk, nor do I dislike it.)

Moving on! While her work seemingly takes precedence over your condition, Miranda is not heartless, and she does do some things to lend you more direct comfort. Specifically, she tries to work in the same room as you when she can, normally while making electronic copies of physical documents, or while looking over the details of a finished experiment. She’s not always one for cuddling, so she won’t often get in bed with you during the daytime. But at night? Yes, fine, she will wrap her arms around you, maybe one of her wings too if you like how soft they are.

Just don’t think that she secretly loves every second. It’s not like she’ll spend half an hour whispering about how sweet and adorable you are as soon as you fall asleep, or anything like that. It’s twenty minutes at the most.

Bonus!Avaskian Caldwell:

“Oh, fuckin’ mood!” Followed by a solid thirty seconds of pure regret. Seriously, though, Ava has spent xer entire life (starting at age 10) dealing with chronic migraines. For a while xe also dealt with POTS (Postural Orthostatic Tachycardia Syndrome), which meant lots of chest pain, but that (thankfully) faded as xe grew into an adult, as is fairly common with the condition. If anyone in Castle Dimitrescu understands unrelenting, unexplainable pain, it’s xer.

That being said… Ava never really managed xer chronic pain, at least not when xe was at xer worst. Xe had to drop out of school because of it. Hell, xe didn’t have a “real” job until xe was almost 23! Didn’t have a chance until things just calmed down for xer. So xe gets anxious whenever you talk about your health, worried that things are (or will at some point be) as bad for you as they were for xer. Other than that, though, you might initially think that xe doesn’t care, or didn’t understand the conversation.

Truth is, xe knows how absolutely fucking ANNOYING it can be to have to explain your health to every new person you meet (like the dozen different doctors you’ve met over the years, possibly every nurse who takes your pulse and thinks it’s a little bit high). So xe did a shit ton of research on your condition, in order to reduce how much you need to explain. Sure, xe will still have questions, and there are always aspects that only you can tell xer, but it’s a nice gesture.

As for helping you destress, xe’s pretty much a mix of Bela and Miranda. You’ll get plenty of massages (because Ava has learned from personal experience what sort of touches help with which sorts of pain), but also some scientific insight on any noticeable patterns. Lots of holding you close and telling you that you’re the coolest person in the world, and that Ava feels beyond lucky to have you.

[mimzy-writing-online]

Hello. I had a question regarding your post about blind characters. I have a character in my WIP that must cover their eyes.. but it’s blind. He may need to tell people he is blind to explain why he covers his eyes though. I was wondering how I might write this character without offending. Thank you :)

I think I want to start by explaining the “covering blind eyes” trope and why it has become a harmful trope. I think understanding why it’s hurtful helps everyone learn how to handle it better.

I would guess that the “blind people wear sunglasses” trope comes from Hollywood for the specific reason of 1. wanting to signal to the audience that the character is obviously blind and 2. avoid breaking the suspension of disbelief by preventing the audience from catching the sighted actor look at visual stimuli (because disabled characters are almost always played by able actors).

But this changed the way the public expects to experience blindness. If watching a sighted actor wear sunglasses and say he’s blind is all the exposure to the blind community a person has had, that’s the only model of blindness they’ll recognize. If they meet a blind person in real life who doesn’t wear sunglasses, it’s going to break this built perception and cause an uncomfortable cognitive dissonance. 

And then there is the common “cloudy-white blank gaze” that pops up in media. It stems from the fact that cataracts is the most common cause of blindness and the appearance of severe cataracts is a cloudy film in the eyes obscuring the iris and pupil. It can also alter what color a person’s eyes appears to be, making them appear paler and grey in the beginning and then as the cataract advances it becomes more yellow/brown and alters a person’s vision to appear more yellow tinted.

There are lots of other eye conditions that makes the eyes look visibly different. Albinism for instance affects the color and structure of the iris. Eyes might be congenitally misshapen. The muscles might be weak or not work and one or both eyes point significantly outward. Someone who was born blind and experienced no visual stimuli might also have weak muscles around their eyes because they never had a reason to focus their eyes on anything.

And unfortunately humans have the habit of feeling uncomfortable when they meet someone who looks very obviously different from the norm, whether that’s a personal style choice (hair color and style, tattoos, clothing choices) or something they can’t help (a visible disability, skin color, scars). 

To the paragraph above, @gothhabiba replied with:  “it's very weird & ahistorical to claim that racism or ableism are some kind of natural "human" trait.. like frankly it's apologia”

You’re right, I wasn’t thinking beyond that generalization or assumption.

Perhaps a better way to put it is: I was raised in a society where I was taught from childhood to think that there was only one kind of human being to be. White, cis, straight, abled, conservative. That’s a very western thing and that’s a thing I’m going to constantly be unlearning.

Racism and ableism and homophobia aren’t innate, that’s a western thing that was forced onto the rest of the world by colonialism. And because western media created this idea that the world is white, abled, cis, straight, and Christian-value leaning, it taught people to think that was the norm so that seeing someone different from that archetype would cause a cognitive dissonance, which causes discomfort.

And instead of working past that cognitive dissonance to learn more and realize there’s so much more to life than media taught you, society encourages you to ignore that cognitive dissonance by sticking your head in the sand-- or TV screen.

So combine these two tropes or common beliefs together and you get something a little dangerous: the idea that blind people cover their eyes because they look obviously different and they’re ashamed (or should be ashamed) of that.

And if you’re someone who’s just gone blind or who was born blind and you have little to no contact with the blind community, then this societal belief that you should be ashamed of how your eyes look becomes detrimental to your self-esteem and further builds internalized ableism.

I’ve lost count of the times I’ve read or watched a blind character cover their eyes with sunglasses because they were ashamed of how their eyes looked. And I distinctly remember a few times where a sighted friend of the character was trying to convince them to stop wearing sunglasses because there’s nothing wrong with looking different--which is true, but it plays into this fantasy of being the perfect abled ally who saves the blind character from being miserable. 

In an ideal world, the character has no reason to believe looking different is a bad thing or diminishes their worth or makes people dislike them. And if they develop this belief, it’s more likely that someone more involved in the disabled community, most likely someone disabled themselves, will set them straight. Or that the character will learn to accept themselves on their own, looks included.

But there are some perfectly valid reasons for any blind person to wear sunglasses. They might have an interest in fashion and sunglasses complete the look they’re going for. They could want to protect their eyes from UV rays while they’re outside. They may experience light sensitivity and sunglasses reduces any discomfort or pain. Those are incredibly common reasons to wear sunglasses whether you’re sighted or blind.

But there are some more complicated situations.

In your words, your character must cover his eyes. You never specified why, so my primary guess is that he has some kind of power that is unpleasant or has devastating affects and the only way to prevent it is to keep his eyes covered. My primary guess stems from this post where an anon and I discussed a retelling of Medusa, a hypothetical blinding of oneself to avoid ever killing anyone ever again, and what I think I would do if I was in that scenario.

So how do you write a blind character who must cover their eyes and avoid some of the complications?

1. Your character must always have the ability to say “fuck off, it’s my business, I don’t have to tell you why I’m blind or why I cover my eyes.”

Most blind people really, really don’t want to get into the nitty-gritty of why they’re blind and how they feel about it and what it’s like being blind with a stranger they’ll never see again or a new acquaintance they don’t know well yet. You have exceptions to that rule where sure, educating the public about blindness is a thing you want to do and you’re committed to helping your community, but I still have days where I don’t want to talk about being blind or disclose my medical crap.

And if someone doesn’t respect their right to their privacy or pushes too much, the blind character is allowed to be angry, is allowed to tell them off and complain without anyone else in the situation vilifying them or saying they’re “overreacting” and “should have just disclosed private information because big deal or whatever.” If they are angry, that’s their right, and it’s not unreasonable, it doesn’t make them a bad person.

2. Your character should not be ashamed of being blind or of covering their eyes. It is a part of their life, they’re used to it by now, even if they weren’t in the beginning.

The shame and internalized ableism is something that should be written about, but that’s for an own-voices story with a blind author. I don’t think an abled person will ever be able to understand how much society expects you to hate yourself and your disability because “being disabled is a tragic thing that ruins your life” and how that does affect your mental health, self esteem, your relationships with others, your medical care, and what kind of accommodations you can get.

3. It wouldn’t hurt to have a few sarcastic lines in response to uncomfortable conversations.

Stranger: so what’s with the...

Blind Character: what’s with what?

S: the... you know

BC: you’re gonna have to be a bit more specific

S: Your eyes?

BC: They’re... eyes

S: but you’re...

BC: Blind?

S: uh...

BC: yeah, I’m blind. *walks away*

Or this conversation:

S: *to some other character* so why are his eyes covered?

(author’s note: which, honestly, that’s fucking rude. At least have the guts to ask me yourself)

BC: If I look anyone in the eye they instantly perish.

*awkward silence*

BC: instantly.

Friend: It’s truly tragic

BC: *melancholic* that’s how I lost my sister. *chokes up* She was so young

Or this conversation:

S: Why are you wearing that?

BC: It’s called fashion Karen!

Or this conversation:

S: are you like... blind?

BC: yes?? why wouldn’t I be?? Wait, are you sighted? Are you one of those sighted people? You poor thing! What caused you to gain your sight? Do you have a car? A bike? Were you born sighted? What’s it like to see color? Do you miss not having to see 

God, I want a chance to try that last one. I haven’t interacted with a stranger in almost a year. One day...

4. Honestly, it’d also be cool if someone’s reaction to your character covering their eyes was like, “cool sunglasses,” or “cool *insert random character, even one you made up* cosplay,” (which is ten times funnier if this character is a notable figure in modern society like an actor who people might cosplay). 

5. You know, if he’s covering his eyes with some kind of blindfold, he should totally have custom blindfolds for his moods. Like, I have a mask that says “suck it up buttercup” and another that says “not today” because sometimes that’s the mood. And sometimes the mood is one of my floral masks, and sometimes the mood is my cat mask.

So, just some thoughts. I hope that helps.

Edit: a commenter said: “op, unless i'm mistaken this kind of reads like anon meant the character ISN'T blind but lies about being blind to explain covering their eyes? it seems like they made a typo on the word "isn't"”

So my original response to the question was based on the assumption that the character is blind. However,

If the character is not blind, then do not under any circumstances have them lie and say they’re blind to escape a mild inconvenience. 

It’s better to have the character actually explain the situation or straight up leave the conversation or invent a more ridiculous lie than to perpetuate the very real stereotype and misconception that there are people who fake being blind and therefore it’s okay to discriminate or harass them if you even suspect they’re faking.

Do not under any circumstances perpetuate that stereotype. Do not harass someone because you don’t think they’re blind enough.