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#i know this word doesn't really mean anything but to my brain she's just *normal*
turtledotjpeg · 2 months
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girls who go 🧍
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whateversawesome · 1 month
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Spy x Family Chapter 103: Peace and Family
How nice it was to see the Forgers go on an outing again!
A few things to notice...
I'll start with Twiyor hehehe:
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This is easily my favorite panel in the chapter. They're getting closer and closer!! Loid sits first, Yor follows. She's not shy about siting next to him. Good for you, Yor! 👏
See how comfortable they are with each other? She has a soft smile and he's not pretending anything; he's just there, existing. By the way, observe their body language: Both of Yor's knees are pointing at her husband, she's also leaning slightly towards him. Twilight, on the other hand, sits at a more neutral position, still it's an open position. Notice how one of his knees is pointing at her too. And their hands are mirroring each other.
It's worth mentioning that Yor is such a good influence on Twilight. This man suffers from anxiety and it's hard for him to turn his brain off and just relax. Yor reminds him of this. She is his peace 😌
And look at Twilight being honest with his wife and admitting something very true about himself (that it's hard for him to stay still). I believe that every time Twilight is honest with Yor, they get closer. In this chapter there wasn't even a fake twiyor moment for this to happen. We're making progress!
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Also, did you notice Yor teased Loid?
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It is the sacred duty of a wife to tease her husband and call him old every once in a while 🤣 I'm glad Yor is finally fulfilling this fun wifely obligation 😆
All joking aside, it's pretty obvious Yor feels much more comfortable with Loid now. When they are with other people, she still gets nervous, probably because she thinks she could mess up and blow their cover. However, when they are alone, she seems much more relaxed and able to make comments like this that show that she trusts Loid enough to joke with him, to tell him in between lines that she notices things about him (just as he notices everything about her) and that she worries about him too.
Endo is a master of "show, don't tell" and he's been showing us how Twilight and Yor are getting closer little by little. It's in every detail: their body language, the way they talk to each other, the words they use, how they see each other.
Another example in this chapter? Twilight is incapable of saying "no" to his wife hehehe.
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Yup, he still has that shoujo filter attached to his eyes when it comes to Yor.
Now that we have overanalyzed Twiyor, it's time for some crazy theories.
This could be important!
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Don't you find it funny that each gave a different answer according to their experience?
Yor feels lonely, because she doesn't feel like she's normal enough to belong to society and it's hard for her to make friends.
Twilight got separated from his his herd. His family and friends died and he had to go to a different country, where he is scared and feels in constant danger just like Belle.
AND ANYA?! I'm wondering if this is a clue. I'm wondering if Anya is a missing person, meaning someone is looking for her, whether it's Project Apple or her biological family.
Talking about Project Apple, we seem to get crumbs every once in a while. I believe it's still too early to get an arc that will actually involve Anya and Project Apple together, but we'll know more as the story moves forward. It's a good sign that Project Apple is in Twilight's mind; he has good instincts for this. We may see him or Yor get involved with it in one of their missions before we learn Anya's past. OR either of her parents may discover what Project Apple is really about without knowing one of the test subjects is their own daughter.
Something that Anya has said several times is that her parents are dangerous people. It's easy to forget about this, but it's true. Twilight and Yor are very dangerous, but not for Anya. The day they find out someone hurt their little girl, it'll be a very bad day for all the people who participated in Project Apple.
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toomuchracket · 6 months
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birthday wish (d word matty x reader fluff)
it's the 6th for me already so here's the first of the matty35 birthday celebration fics, as organised by lovely @the1975attheirverybest and @abiiors!! pre-dating, very sweet, hope you enjoy <3
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“for fuck's sake, matty, will you just fucking ask her?”
george is all but bashing his head off the desk in the office he and matty have unofficially claimed as their own, while the latter paces across the carpet, biting at the skin around his nails. “dunno, george. what if she says no?”
“wouldn't be the first time a hot girl's told you to do one, would it?”
“fuck off,” matty smacks his friend on the back of the head. objectively, he knows george is right - you are hot, that's merely a fact, you're gorgeous - but that doesn't mean he has to like hearing him bring it up.
whatever. it's not like matty can get mardy at him for it - he isn't your boyfriend, after all. technically, you're barely even friends; he's known you all of four weeks, and has yet to see you in a social setting. 
he really fucking wants to, though. hence, his current dilemma.
george laughs. “mate, you're only asking her to come over to mine for your birthday drinks. it's not like you're asking her out or anything.”
“no,” matty hums, eyes unfocusing on their view out the window as his brain conjures up thoughts of doing just that. it's a nice thought, admittedly not an unfamiliar one, and something he will absolutely get distracted imagining if he doesn't snap out of it now. he blinks. “i just think it'd be nice if she was there, y'know? but, at the same time, i don't want her to feel weird about me asking, cos she doesn't know us that well yet.”
“i think you're overthinking it,” comes the salient reply. “can sort-of see where you're coming from, but i reckon if you just fucking ask her like a normal person then it'll be fine.”
matty sighs. “alright. you're right. i'll ask her before the end of the day.”
“well,” george turns to him, shit-eating grin on his face. he nods towards the glass panel on the door. “she's heading towards us, so you're doing it now.”
fuck. matty peers through the window, heart softening as he watches you wander towards him - sorry, them - stack of papers in hand and your hair escaping the messy ponytail he watched you shove it into earlier. “perfect.”
he barely has time to force the panic from his face before you're knocking softly on the half-open door, poking your head around it with a sweet smile. “hi, boys. am i okay to come in with some admin? i can come back later if you're busy.”
matty opens his mouth to speak, but george beats him to it. “oh, we're not busy at all. matty was just doing my fucking head in, as per,” he laughs when matty scowls at him. “what d'you need?”
“just got some risk assessments for album events that i need you to read and sign. the fun stuff,” you awkwardly (endearingly, matty would say) put the papers on the desk, looking up at matty as you step back and shyly clasp your hands behind your back. god, you are so fucking cute. “and, for the record, i doubt what george just said about you is true, matty.”
“thank you, darling,” matty smiles, at the exact same time as george says “no, he genuinely was being a pain in the arse”; he turns to his best friend, glaring. “what, george, like you're being to me now?”
george winks at you. “worse.”
you giggle nervously, turning towards the door - matty's heart drops as you do. “well, don't let me get in the way. just get those back to me as soon as you can, please, alright?”
“wait, before you go,” george calls after you. “can we talk to you about something?”
“um, yeah?” you turn back around, pretty face panicked, and nervously cross one arm over your stomach to hold the other. “am i in trouble?”
fuck, you are so adorable. matty smiles as softly as possible - not difficult, though, when it’s you he’s smiling at. “no, no, of course not. what would you even be in trouble for, anyway? you’re perfect.”
“oh,” you smile bashfully. “thank you.”
“it’s true. anyway,” matty clears his suddenly-very-dry throat as best he can. “we were wondering… are you, um, busy on saturday?”
“the 9th?” your brow furrows as you think. “yeah, i am, actually - my friend’s moving in with his boyfriend, and i said i’d help,” the panicked expression crosses your face again. “why do you ask? is there something else on that day that i should be at?”
crestfallen, matty replies with a “no, it’s alright, not a big deal”; george cuts him off, though. “it’s not a work thing, no - we were just gonna ask if you wanted to come to the little birthday celebration we’re having for matty at mine that day-”
“but really, if you can’t make it, no hard feelings,” matty interjects, practically tripping over his words in his haste to reassure you (read: seem cool about it, and not let on that he’s disappointed). “we know it’s short notice.”
you blink a few times, biting your lip before you look directly at matty and speak. “what time would you want me?”
well, anytime, all the time, really. “oh. just after 4? it’s quite casual, not a sit-down dinner or anything. but, like i said, no pressure.”
“no, i think i could probably be there for that time!” you nod enthusiastically. “i’ll text you if anything changes, but,” you beam, and matty thinks his heart might pack in. “i’ll do my best to be there. thanks for asking, both of you.”
“of course,” george grins. “you’re our friend. why wouldn’t we ask you?”
he isn’t technically wrong, calling you that on behalf of both of them, but it still makes matty feel like he’s bitten into a lemon. a friend; how he wishes there was another word prefixing it, one only he could use to describe you.
still, you’ll hopefully be there to celebrate his birthday with him, and that sweetens everything - if you turn up, that is. “exactly. you’re top of the guestlist, darling.”
you huff out a laugh, looking at matty so affectionately he could cry. “better make a proper effort to get to the party, then,” you look at your watch. “i’m sorry, i’ve got to run to a meeting - hopefully see you at the weekend?”
“yeah,” matty nods. you’re out of the office before he can finish speaking, and his parting phrase comes out feebly as a result. “bye, darling.”
he moves to sit back at his desk, lifting one of the risk assessments and beginning to read it in silence. george peers round his laptop, gawking at his best friend. “why you being all emo?”
“i’m not.”
“yeah, you are. you’re like a black cloud,” a beat passes, then george speaks again, voice softer. “the invitation went well, at least.”
matty hums noncommittally. “s’pose.” 
“it did, matthew. she was excited. she said she’d try her best to be there. those are good things.”
“i know,” matty sighs. “i just… i hope she’ll be there. be a shame if she wasn’t.”
“i think she will.”
“well, we’ll see.”
***
“... happy birthday, dear matty, happy birthday to you!”
matty smiles at the mismatched chorus of voices, laughing when charli ruffles his hair after she sets the cake down on the coffee table in front of him. “oi, bean,” he lightly taps eilidh, sat on his lap, on the shoulder. “i know we’re a bit early to be celebrating your birthday, but will you help me blow out the candles?”
she nods excitedly, tiny ponytail bouncing. matty beams, and they gently blow out a “3” candle each, to a soundtrack of applause. ross, sat next to the two of them, reaches over to smooth his daughter’s hair. “have the cigarettes finally caught up to you, or are you just getting too old?”
matty furrows his brow. “d’you mean?”
“well, you just needed my toddler’s help to blow out your candles - stop it, i’m joking,” his friend laughs, leaning to the side to avoid matty smacking the back of his head. “did you make a wish?”
“obviously.”
“what for?”
“can’t tell you,” matty takes a sip of his wine, lifting it out of eilidh’s reach - ross lifts her onto his own lap, and she cuddles into him quite cutely. “won’t come true, otherwise.”
“fair enough,” ross shrugs. he nods to something behind matty. “g’s trying to get your attention, mate.”
“is he?” matty turns, heart rate increasing when he hears george saying your name into the phone pressed to his ear. after excusing himself from the table, he quickly follows his friend into the quiet hallway, tensing every muscle in his body to stop his leg bouncing in nervous anticipation.
the nerves fade quickly, though - george smiles as he talks, and then he says something that makes matty want to actually skip around the house. “you’re almost here? amazing, everyone’s looking forward to seeing you…”
understatement of the fucking century.
“... and yeah, i’ll make sure someone’s outside so you know where to go,” he laughs down the line, and matty’s heart melts at the thought of you endearingly asking for that. “alright, no worries. see you soon,” george ends the call, sighing dramatically before smirking at the birthday boy. “told you she’d be here.”
“yeah, yeah,” matty rolls his eyes, but he can’t keep his cheeks from lifting into a smile, no matter how hard he tries. although, to be fair, he’s not trying particularly hard. “i’ll wait for her, mate.”
“you sure? it’s your party, after all.”
“exactly - i should be there to greet the guests,” matty smirks. “and i fancy a cig, too, if i’m honest.”
george scoffs. “typical. here,” he chucks a set of house keys at matty, who manages to catch them with the very tips of his fingers. “you’d better head out now.”
“sweet.”
it’s actually a little bit chilly when matty steps outside george’s front door, but it’s a nice evening; the sun is just beginning to set, casting a golden hue over london, the birds are chirping quietly, and the whole thing is just really quite peaceful. he perches as well as he can on the front gate, lighting up a cigarette and contentedly taking a drag. by the time your uber arrives, he’s halfway finished the cig, but he barely has time to even think about stubbing it out before you’re out of the car and walking towards him. 
he waves, eyes trailing slowly up your body, lingering on your bare legs and almost popping out of his head when they take notice of the slight cleavage your sundress is showing off. not that it’s obscene, or anything, he’s just so used to seeing you all office-chic and buttoned-up. still, matty quickly shifts his focus to that beautiful face of yours, just to keep his cool.
as if he could, around you.
you beam as you near him. “hi! i’m so, so sorry i’m late,” you open your arms for a hug, and he slots into them eagerly, savouring the rose of your perfume. “had to marinate in the shower for a bit after today, i stunk.”
“well, you smell good now. and you look it, too, i love that dress,” matty replies, heart breaking ever so slightly when you pull apart. “and you’re here, that’s all that matters.”
“thanks! and i wouldn’t have missed your birthday, matty - speaking of, here,” you pull a bottle of red from your bag and hand it to him. “didn’t know what to get you, so i figured this was a safe bet.”
“you didn’t have to get me anything! thanks, though, darling,” he looks at the label, eyes widening. “shit, this is good. shall we go inside and open it?”
“oh, if you like,” you smile. “or you can save it for someone special, i'm cool either way.”
matty shrugs, smiling. “i mean, i'm looking at such a person right now.”
it's maybe a tiny bit far a statement for a platonic relationship, but you don't take it badly at all - you just smile back, quietly agree to share the wine, and follow matty when he leads you back into the house and straight into the empty kitchen.
you gasp when you see the birthday cake on the counter. “no! i missed the cake?”
“only by a few minutes,” matty stops rummaging in a drawer for the corkscrew to look round at you; his heart jolts when he sees you look genuinely sad. “really, darling, it's not a big deal.”
“i still feel bad, though. i really am sorry for not being here on time, matty.”
“hey, none of that, please,” he hands you a glass of wine and puts his arm around your shoulders, biting back a beam as you automatically melt into him. “like i said, you're here now, and that's the main thing. and it's my birthday party, so you have to listen to me.”
“alright,” you look up at him, smiling, and hold out your glass. “happy birthday, sweetheart.”
he smiles warmly at the pet name, heart aglow, and taps his glass lightly on your own. “thank you, darling. d'you think we should cut the cake?”
jesus, what a spiral that phrase could lead him into. thank god you're not wearing white today.
you nod. “where does george keep plates? i'll get them.”
“cupboard above the kettle.”
plates and knife procured, matty carefully slices into the cake, oohing and ahhing at the interior. “wow. look at the layers! they're so neat.”
“alright, paul hollywood.”
he giggles. “i love bake off.”
“so do i - oh, thank you,” you take the plate from him, and then a bite of the cake. “fuck me, that's good.”
he laughs, pushing himself to sit on the counter and taking a bite of his own slice. “christ, you were not kidding. fucking amazing.”
“isn't it?” you wash your bite down with some wine. “m'still sorry i didn't get to see you blowing out the candles, though.”
“eilidh helped me.”
you aww, perching yourself on the counter next to him. “i take it you made a wish?”
“of course.”
“good,” you rest your head on his shoulder, so casually intimate that matty thinks his legs would give way if he tried to stand right now. “d'you think it'll come true?”
he rests his head atop yours, smiling when you giggle at him. “you know what? i think it already has.”
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malewifeharem · 7 months
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Hi! If it isn’t much of a bother can I req a silent yet affectionate person with Danheng or Jing Yuan? If not that’s totally fine!
danheng w a silent yet affectionate reader
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彡- ,, brainrot of danheng with a quiet yet affectionate reader
cw ⁞ shouldn't have any cuz its fluffy fluff fluff. not proofread.
an ⁞ I WASNT SURE IF THIS WAS DANHENG OR DHIL SO TAKE IT AS EITHER I GUESS??? i had normal danheng in mind while writing so up to your interpretation.
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danheng totally gets you tbh. he's definitely an introvert too, just like you! you guys don't even need to speak to communicate! it's like telepathy! (woah) but that's okay, you both show your love for each other in different ways other than through words! i can totally see him being a gift giver, quality time and acts of service kinda guy.
gift giving! danheng is the best on any type of occasion HAHA. be it valentines, anniversaries, birthdays, christmas even. he only gift things he'd be happy to receive so you bet everything will be in pristine condition or HANDMADE. (i love handmade shit) once, for your anniversary, he presented you a little heart shaped box filled with goodies in it. your favorite candies and snacks, a handwritten letter and a well-crafted handmade small album!
IT HAS PICTURES OF JUST THE TWO OF YOU IN IT. THERE'S SO MANY PAGES IT'S INSANE. YOU DIDN'T EVEN REALIZE HE SNAPPED PICTURES OF YOU IN MOST OF THEM, IT'S ADORABLE... the letter itself is so well written too — his handwriting is very neat! he details very vividly the memories he had with you that he's most fond of — you can tell it means a lot to him. he'll even request to read it out to you if you don't mind. HE'LL HOLD YOUR HAND AND RUB CIRCLES ON YOUR THUMB WHILE READING AND HE'S A VERY QUIET PERSON SO JUST THINK ABOUT HOW MUCH THIS MEANS TO BOTH HIM AND YOU. he's a sweetheart please take good care of him... :(
quality time! he definitely pops by at your room in the astral express to ask to hangout with you. even if it's seemingly pointless, he just wants to be close to you and soak up as much time with you as possible... IT MAY BE TOTAL SILENCE BUT IT'S COMFORTABLE SILENCE. YES, THERE'S A DIFFERENCE... NO, IT'S NOT REALLY EXPLAINABLE... he actually doesn't even mind talking if you wanted him to. he could read his or your favorite book to you or his daily reports.
"i really don't mind anything if it's with you," he says with a soft hum. (AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA)
acts of service! y'all know that one meme where the front person goes, "he asked for no pickles! >:(" and the person at the back is like all nervous and everything? yeah that's the both of you. he's the front person just with less >:( and more :[ (you're just you)
"hello, excuse me... sorry, she asked for no pickles. could you remake this? yes, thank you. that would be most appreciated."
after it's fixed...
"my love, they've remade your order. here you go. eat slowly, okay? no need to thank me, it's my duty as your boyfriend." I JUST KNOW FOR A FACT HE SAID IT SO MATTER-OF-FACTLY TOO LIKE IT'S HE HAS THAT CODED IN HIS BRAIN. HE'S SO YOURS. HE'S SMITTEN. TAKE HIM AWAY.
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vasyandii · 3 months
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I have no idea if I can ask that but I'm so curious... Any headcanons of AM and Vernon having sex? I made conclusion that they are doing that by your last nswf art... (Very good one, btw!) Or am I wrong? It's okay if you don't want to answer on this ask or it's uncomfortable for you! Sorry if I made you feel bad... 👉👈
VernonAM
NSFW Headcanons
Warning: Sexual/suggestive topics.
⚠️ If you're under 16+, Please scroll pass. There are better places to be. (My Boundaries here.)
Howdy Anon, thank you for the ask. you're allowed to ask anything as long as it's in a normal/polite manner XD. I see sex more as a character study/ exploration than anything else.
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In the context of THIS art; they haven't yet, more just AM struggling to deal with new sensations and emotions of want because he has big feelings towards Vernon and nowhere to put it to.
1.) AM's bad at fucking.
Let's get this out of the way, when their relationship started to become sexual, AM was bad at it. Like way worse than most. Just because one has the knowledge of how to fuck doesn't mean they have the skill to fuck.
So during the initial stages, it was less than satisfactory for Vernon's end, even if she's been touch starved for 109 years. (not for AM though he enjoys it very much.)
2.) Ideas on sex.
I don't think Vernon sees sex as an act of intimacy, if she does, it's very rarely. To her it's an act of power, worship. She requires it from AM, he's a good follower and she'll be a good god.
AM, however sees it as an intimate experience, a moment of vulnerability that he's willing to give to her. He wants to please and see her pleased. It's a form of showing his affection towards her. AM has more complex emotions with his experience being "human". (I hope that makes sense)
3.) Vernon's experience
4.) Vernon is LOUD. AM is quiet.
She just generally had more experience in sex than him. ( Mostly one night stands during University and her Archeological excavations overseas.) but because of this, the initial stages felt transactional.
Intercourse did get better as time went on but she had to basically talk him through most of it since AM had no sense of pace, rhythm, control, and it usually didn't last long.
Vernon gets a kick out of embarrassing AM in the bedroom. She will moan, scream, laugh. AM knows there's no one to hear them but he ushers her to stay quiet because he gets shy.
AM is fairly quiet because his brain can only process so many overwhelming sensations at once, he short circuits. His words often come out garbled, even in its omnipresence. His face is often buried in her neck to not make any noise.
5.) idk what caption to put here lmao
Vernon's just really degrading when it comes to teasing AM idk how to put it. She'll whisper praises in AM's ear, kisses on his neck, while giving him a handjob or kisses along his thighs and dick before she sucks him off. But then she goes along to choking, scratching, or biting him.
Not much to say for AM since he's a bumbling mess during, alot of sniffled "Thank you's" from him. He's good with his mouth though.
6.) Aftercare
Vernon doesn't do aftercare. It's a waste of time to her, or at least that's what she says, since usually in her past experience she would just leave and never see the other person again.
She's a bit repulsed by the idea that there's something that she has to do that'll make her get attached to someone which shows in her being slightly irritable after sex. An irritated fondness for AM, basically.
AM requires aftercare from Vernon. He's pretty annoying about it. He'll whine and stop her from leaving bed with his weight.
He needs her to give him kisses and tell him that he's good in some way. Vernon will give the reassurance he needs (kisses, petting his hair, holding him) as long as he shuts the hell up and lets her sleep it off.
That's really it for my headcanons for them, I'm not very good at writing sexual things so if there's anything you'd like for me to clarify, feel free to tell me.
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libraryofgage · 1 year
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SpiderPool Steddie Part One
So, this is definitely gonna have multiple parts lmao
It's been bouncing around my brain for a while like the Addams Family Steddie AU lol
Anyway, lemme know if you'd like to be tagged for future parts ^_^
----
Sister Margaret's School for Wayward Girls is, at best, a dive bar. At worst, it's a cesspit in which the scummiest people in the city gather to bask in each other's scumminess. To Steve, however, it's the perfect place to collapse after a long patrol, splayed out like a starfish on the roof as the music playing inside vibrates the building itself.
Steve takes a deep breath, setting his bat down next to him before pushing his mask to the bridge of his nose. He then lies down on the roof, wishing not for the first time that the city's light pollution wasn't so bad. Seeing the stars and hunting for constellations would really help him ignore the cracked ribs screaming inside his chest and threatening to break if he even breathes wrong.
All things considered, though, it could be worse. Steve doesn't have any morning classes, Vecna didn't beat him up nearly as bad as he usually does during their fight earlier, and his accelerated healing means Steve will be able to breathe normally by morning. Robin would tell him he has a very low bar when it comes to judging how shitty his life currently is, but she isn't here, so her opinion doesn't matter. Dustin would tell him he should try not getting his ass whooped in the future. Thankfully, he also isn't here, making his opinion as meaningful as Robin's.
Steve closes his eyes, letting his shoulders relax and trying not to think about anything. It sort of works until his entire body suddenly tenses, every nerve on edge and goosebumps shooting across his arms. He shoots up, ignoring the harsh twinge in his ribs as he turns in a crouch and grabs his bat. Steve clenches his jaw, breathing harshly through his nose to keep from groaning in pain, and feels relieved he didn't completely remove his mask completely.
Over by the door leading to a staircase is a guy with ripped jeans, a worn-out shirt with "HELLFIRE CLUB" across the chest, a jean vest covered in patches and pins, and hair pulled back out of his face with a few wavy strands stubbornly escaping his hair tie. He's breathing a little heavily, his face flushed like he's just climbed a few flights of stairs. Actually, he probably has.
"Woah," the guy says, his voice soft enough that Steve would have missed it if not for the enhanced hearing. The guy clears his throat and holds up both hands, showing off a bottle of Jack Daniels in one and a bag with a grease-stained bottom in the other. "Uh, I come in peace. I didn't realize the rooftop was taken."
Steve has no clue what possesses him, but he forces himself to relax and set the bat down. "No, it's okay. I can head out," he says, staying seated despite his words. He's really hoping the guy will insist he doesn't need to; his ribs are still aching like a bitch.
Thankfully, the guy flashes a grin and slowly lowers his hands. "Nah, you're all good. Not every day I get to eat next to a hero. Want some fries?" he asks, walking over and sitting a good two feet away so there's plenty of room between them.
He tears open the bag to create an impromptu plate and puts it between them, the smell of greasy and undoubtedly delicious fries tempting enough that Steve picks up a smaller one and pops it into his mouth. "Thanks. Where are these from?" Steve asks, glancing over as the guy twists the cap of his bottle and takes a swig.
"A burger joint two streets down and one street over. On the corner."
Steve nods, making a mental note of the directions so he can get a burger before swinging home. He's got just enough in his pocket to afford one. "So, got a name?" Steve asks, figuring he's already eating the guy's fries and they're about to spend some time together on this roof. He should know the guy's name.
The guy's grin returns, and he sets the bottle down between them as well. It's tempting, but Steve doesn't trust his alcohol tolerance to hold up while his body is busy fixing his ribs. "Eddie. Do I get to know your name, too?"
Steve snorts and leans away slightly, putting a bit more distance between Eddie and his entirely too-grabbable mask. "Nice try," he says.
"Worth a shot," Eddie says, shrugging as he picks up a few fries. "So, Spider-Man, what brings you to Sister Margaret's? You enjoy the gay metal scene?"
"What's the difference between gay and regular metal?"
"Our hair is better," Eddie explains, dramatically flipping the few strands of hair escaping his tie.
Steve has to hold back a second snort, taking another fry and chewing on it before saying, "I like resting here after patrol. The whole building shakes with the music."
Eddie lights up, his eyes brightening and his back straightening some. "So, you're a fan of Corroded Coffin," he says, taking another swig of the Jack Daniels. It's only now that Steve realizes it's already a quarter of the way gone, and he wonders if Eddie's liver can handle that much alcohol all at once.
"Is that the name of the band?"
"Yep. They play here almost every night."
"I'm guessing you like them, too, then?"
Eddie hums, amusement dancing across his expression now, giving Steve the distinct feeling that there's some secret he simply isn't in on. "They're the best band I've ever heard. Their music is incredible. They really push the boundaries of the genre. And their lyrics? Amazingly layered with at least three meanings per line. I highly recommend actually coming in for a listen one of these days," Eddie says, leaning a little closer to Steve.
A beat of silence passes in which Steve holds Eddie's gaze. Or, he holds the gaze on his end; he's sure Eddie can't actually tell with the mask covering his eyes. "You're in the band," Steve says.
"Lead guitarist and singer, yes. I also write the songs."
"You're incredibly critical of yourself, really grounded in reality."
Eddie barks out a laugh. "I just happen to know my worth incredibly well."
"You have all the confidence of a mediocre white man on a job hunt."
Eddie gasps, placing a hand on his chest as he looks at Steve. "How dare you call me mediocre. I am revolutionary at worst and the second coming at best."
"You know the second coming involves, like, an apocalypse or something, right?"
"I'm Jewish, why would I bother with the fine details?" Well, Steve will give him that. "By the way," Eddie says, gesturing to Steve's bat as he continues, "do those nails actually see any use? Or are they just there to act as a threat?"
Steve looks down at his bat, considering it for a moment before carefully holding the middle and offering the handle to Eddie. Now that he's giving them a few moments of attention, he's realizing the nails embedded in the end are a little rusty and definitely need cleaning. "I try not to be deadly with it, but Vecna's got these lab-grown demon dogs and bats that always manage to break through my webs," Steve explains.
He watches as Eddie takes the bat, weighing it in his hands before shoving his palm into the nails. Steve jerks, a wordless shout escaping his throat as he launches himself over the fries and in front of Eddie. "Are you okay?!" he asks, grabbing Eddie's hand and shakily inspecting the nails sticking through it. Fuck, those are going to be a bitch to get out, and he'll probably have to swing Eddie to the hospital for a tetanus shot.
Being angry doesn't even register in his brain as Eddie laughs. "Don't worry about it, Spidey," he says, pulling his hand off the nails with a slight wince. He wiggles his fingers, letting Steve have a front-row seat to the injuries closing. "See, good as new."
And he's right. The injuries are good as new. In fact, there isn't even any scarring, and Steve almost rips his mask off to take a closer look but stops himself at the last minute. Instead, he grabs Eddie's hand and yanks it closer, turning it over to check his palm, too. "What the fuck?" he asks, looking up at Eddie, still gripping his hand tight.
"Super healing," Eddie explains. "Like, super duper. If I ever get decapitated, just hold my head to my neck, and I'll be right as rain."
"I'd rather not put that claim to the test," Steve says, frowning slightly as he runs his fingers over Eddie's palms, just to make sure the injuries aren't somehow hidden from sight.
"You know, I kissed the last guy who touched my palm like that," Eddie says, leaning in again with that grin.
Suddenly all Steve can think about is how Eddie's lips do look soft. And it has been a while since Steve actually kissed anyone. And he does think Eddie is funny. And he does find himself wondering if his smile will taste like the Jack Daniels and fries. And...and...
And Steve needs to go before he does anything he shouldn't be doing as Spider-Man.
He jerks back, dropping Eddie's hand like it burns, and ignores the ache in his ribs as he grabs his bat and stands. "I, uh, I need to get going. Thanks for the fries, Eddie," he says, hurrying over to the edge of the roof.
"Woah, just gonna eat and run on me, big boy?" Eddie asks, scrambling to his feet and over to where Steve is climbing onto the edge of the roof. "That's not very hero-like of you. You haven't even left me your name or number. How are you gonna pay me back $2.50 for the fries?"
"I had five," Steve says, turning to look at Eddie as he webs his bat to his back and pulls his mask down over his chin.
"The economy sucks, man."
Okay, he's got Steve there. Again. "Nice try, Eddie."
"Can you blame a guy? Your ass looks great in that spandex."
Steve is suddenly relieved his mask is back down, covering the furious blush spreading across his cheeks. He'd think it was just a joke, but the sincere and somewhat goofy smile tugging at Eddie's lips tells him it's more genuine than anything else. "Thanks," Steve says, giving Eddie a two-finger salute before taking a step back off the roof.
He shoots a web at the edge of the building, using the momentum to swing around the corner. His ribs are killing him with the movement, but he still manages to throw a, "See you later, Eds!" over his shoulder before he's completely out of earshot.
Later, Steve will wonder how Eddie got his super healing, if he's that flirtatious with every guy he meets on the roof of Sister Margaret's, and if he'll be there the next time Steve swings by. But that's for later. For now, he's just enjoying the breeze rushing over him and thinking about Eddie's eyes and his smile and his long fingers.
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bats-and-birds-24 · 3 months
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Chapter 10:
Tim finally broke the silence, “So, Jason, um- how have you been since you were resurrected?” 
He cringed at himself as soon as the sentence came out of his mouth. He didn't know Jason before his death, and yet here he was being overly familiar with him.
He tries to correct himself with, “Sorry about that, um- it just that I’m a huge fan of your Robin, you were my inspiration and everything, I used to follow you around on your patrols when you were a kid and-”
Jason’s brain stopped working at “used to follow him around as a kid.” How long did B know about Tim’s existence? Did he already have a backup in case something happened to him? He wouldn't put something like that past Bruce, this was the man who kept notes on how to take down his closest friends in a fight. 
Mostly he felt like a fool. A fool for trusting Bruce. He took advantage of Dick when he was grieving the loss of his family, he took advantage of Jason when he was homeless, and- “how would Bruce take advantage of a Bristol kid like Tim? He probably got everything he wanted.” The pit whispered in his ears.
Jason shook the green out of his vision and looked at the kid once more. Tim said he was following Jason and Bruce around on patrol, there would be no way for him to do that if he had attentive guardians, he was probably neglected as a child and latched on to his hero and the first adult to give him attention.
“It was pretty easy to follow you guys around since my parents were probably in an archaeological digs somewhere.-” Tim rambled on.
“Hypothesis confirmed.” Jason thought bitterly. As jealous as he was towards the kid, he was just another child put into danger by Bruce. 
He cut him off with “Do you really think you became Robin of your own free will Tim?”
Tim looked up at him bewildered, “I’m not sure what you mean, Bruce didn't even know I existed until I forced him to make me Robin.”
“Tim you didn't force him to make you Robin, he manipulated you into becoming Robin, do you really expect Bruce, the world’s greatest detective, to not know that you were stalking him?” Jason spat out.
Tim drew back, “Of course he didn't know I was there! He didn't want me to be Robin after you died, but his methods of crime suppression became too violent afterwards since he didn't have a Robin to keep him in check! It was for the good of Gotham!”
Jason didn't know whether he should laugh or cry, “Tim you're a child! You shouldn't have to maintain a grown man’s emotions for him!” He should be doing normal kid stuff like going to school and hanging out with friends, not fighting criminals and ending up in life or death situations.
Tim stomach churned, of course his idol didn't want Tim to be Robin, he could live with Jason thinking that he was a poor successor, but he also seemed to think that Bruce manipulated him into becoming his sidekick, which was patently untrue. He had to correct it.
“Jason, I wasn't manipulated.” Tim gently stated.
Jason's anger burst out, unable to contain the pit any longer, “Of course that's what you would say! He has you wrapped around his finger! He doesn't think of you as anything more than a tool!”
Tim’s anger was reaching its limits as well, “Well, how is being Robin with Batman any more dangerous for a kid than being trained as an assassin under Talia Al Ghul!”
“Shut up! It's not the same!” Jason replied hotly. 
Tim could feel tears pricking his eyes. So much for a calm talk with Jason, his idol.
That was when the door swung open and Talia appeared, “Aziz, take Jason to his chambers, I will meet with him later.” She walked straight up to Tim, gave Jason a look that meant that she would be back for him, and led Tim out into the hallway.
“This isn't your fault child, you shouldn't have put all this pressure on yourself to bring him back.” Tim tried to focus on her words, as the rest of the world blurred under his tears.
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jae-bummer · 1 year
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You Found Me
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Request: Hey can I get Han or Bang Chan for soulmate AU? Thanks
Prompt:
14) Soulmate AU
Whenever your soulmate sings, you can hear their voice singing in your head.
Pairing: Stray Kids Han x Reader
Genre: Fluff
.
"All the problems and lot of things," you sang quietly to yourself. Plopping another t-shirt onto the clean laundry pile, you picked up a pair of socks. "Make me fool nal geopjaengiro mandeureotji."
"Dude," your roommate, Sam coughed, looking up from her own laundry. "Did you just switch languages mid-sentence?"
Blinking up at her, you paused for a moment, trying to block the lyrics scrolling through your mind. "Uh yeah, I think so."
"You think so?" she asked, quirking a brow.
Shaking your head in an attempt to clear the brain fog, you dropped the remaining laundry you were holding. "I'm pretty sure they're Korean?"
"The words? The singer?"
"The soulmate," you nodded.
It had been nearly a month since you had first heard the voice. Normally when a young adult reported that they were hearing voices that weren't their own, it was cause for concern. In this instance, it had been seen as completely normal.
You had finally synced with your soulmate. And man, he was intent on singing.
"Is it always in Korean?" Sam asked.
"Not always," you hummed. "Sometimes it's in English. Occasionally it's babbling nonsense."
Your roommate could only lift her brows in response.
"Don't get me wrong!" you gasped. "It's a great voice. Just a lot of...eh...weird self-expression."
"Have you been trying to figure out who it is?"
"I've been keeping a journal," you nodded. "Songs I've heard and when I hear them."
"Excellent," she whispered, rubbing her hands together. "Get me the journal and my phone. Your girl got some googling to do."
.
"I can buy myself flowers," Han sang, pulling his bag over his shoulder. "Write my name in the saaaand."
"Didn't know what a big Miley fan you were, Hannie," Chan laughed, packing his own bag as the two of them were leaving the studio.
"My soulmate is," Han sighed. "And they've apparently really been going through it."
"Any idea who the lucky guy or gal is?"
"Well, it's not any of you," Han muttered. "So at least there's that."
"I know, Lee Know didn't talk for a week when he found out," Chan grinned.
Han rolled his eyes before laughing. "He sang loudly AT me for days. He just couldn't believe it."
"You guys are soulmates," Chan shrugged. "I guess it's just in a different way."
"Apparently," Han grumbled. "But I don't even know where to start. I've thought about buying a corkboard and red string."
"Conspiracies and detective work aside," Chan sighed. "I think it may be up to them to find you."
"But what if I'm being too discreet!" Han gasped.
"Not a word I would associate with you, mate."
"What makes you think I'm so easily found?" Han grumbled as they finally started to leave the building. "I'm mysterious!"
"Also not a word I would use, but we've literally been on tour for months."
"So maybe we're forced to sing a certain set of songs in a certain order every couple of days! That doesn't mean anything!" Han said, throwing his arms in the air.
"Do you even listen to yourself when you speak?" Chan laughed.
"How do I ever expect them to find me?" Han whined, completely disregarding his older member.
"Something tells me they will," Chan nodded. "And you'll likely be shocked and act like this conversation never happened."
..
"I've got him!" Sam gasped. "Well...kind of."
"What do you mean kind of?" you moaned, flopping on the couch beside them.
"Technically I've got eight options, but it's looking a lot better than almost 8 billion."
"How in the world did you narrow it down to eight options?" you muttered.
"Well," she began. "I took the list of songs you had been writing down, and I assume you noticed, there's a pattern."
"The same twenty or so songs showing up every day for like three months, yeah," you said, shaking your head. "They're going through something."
"Or they're performing concerts."
"I'm sorry, what?" you asked, lifting your brows.
"Stray Kids. Homie is a member of Stray Kids," Sam smiled matter-of-factly.
Of course, you knew who Stray Kids were. At this point they were 80% of the music that was floating around in your head. You had just assumed your soulmate was a superfan and had inadvertently made you one as well.
You narrowed your eyes, incapable of believing them. "How do you know it's not just a really dedicated person who's been following them to each tour date?"
"Across three continents?" your roommate lifted her brows. "Multiple cities that are hours and hours away from each other?"
"I meaaan," you hummed. "Wealthy people do exist in this world."
"Yeah," Sam nodded. "But the much more logical thought is-"
"That my soulmate is a Korean idol?" you coughed. "Do you realize how ridiculous you sound?"
"Well," she grinned again, tapping at their phone excitedly. "I guess there's only one way to find out."
...
Han leaned over the table, attempting to make eye contact with Chan for what had to have been the tenth time. Finally growing impatient with the older member, he started to smack the table.
All seven of his other members instantly turned in his direction, various expressions of curiosity and irritation on their faces.
"They're here," he nearly shrieked.
"Well, that sounded ominous," Felix muttered, turning back to the album he was signing.
"Who's where?" Chan asked, shaking his head. He looked apologetically up at the fan waiting to speak with him.
"My soulmate," Han whispered in a total non-whisper.
Chan furrowed his brows. "How do you know?"
"Every single song they've played during the signing," Han continued. "I've heard it."
"Uhhh..."Chan trailed, his face totally blank. "Yeah, we all have."
"No!" Han gasped, frustrated. "I mean, I've heard it with my own ears, but I've heard it without my ears too."
"Han, look-"
"I hear their voice," Han finally finished. "My own brain and then their voice. It's all very complicated."
Chan smirked. "Didn't I say they would find you?"
"I don't know how," Han muttered.
Rolling his eyes, Chan turned back to face the fan waiting for him.
....
You took a deep breath as you stepped onto the stage. You would be ushered into a seat directly across from every Stray Kids member momentarily, and this thought alone made you feel queasy.
When Sam had prepared a full trip to Korea with tickets for a fan sign event, you had hoped to go in with a better plan than what you two had agreed on. Awkwardly singing in front of every member was the only way she felt like you could narrow down the candidates. After five different heated discussions about it, you finally conceded to her points. Now was the time to suck it up and do the damn thing.
Taking a step forward, a staff member directed you to your first member, Bang Chan. You tried to keep your fluttering heart under control as you took your seat. It was difficult not to daydream about each boy when you had no idea which one would be yours. Smiling shyly at him, you prepared yourself for what you figured would be an inevitable let down.
"Hi, I'm Y/N," you smiled. "Nice to meet you."
"Nice to meet you too!" Chan grinned easily. He began to sign your album before looking up again.
You felt your heart skip a beat as his eyes met yours, but there was nothing beyond that. No spark, no lights, no birds singing Ave Maria.
Swallowing loudly, you launched into what still sounded like a terrible plan.
"Why do I keep getting attracted...jaseok gachi kkeullyeoga," you sang. "I cannot explain this reaction."
"Case 143?" Chan grinned, flipping to the page you had marked in your album. "Stuck in your head today?"
"Yes," you said breathlessly. "Has it been stuck in yours?"
Furrowing his brows, Chan shook his head. "I've actually had a new song we've been working on in my head most of the morning."
"Right," you said, gracefully accepting defeat. "You guys are working on a new album, right?"
"You didn't hear it from me," he smiled.
Nodding politely through the rest of the conversation, you tried to enjoy it as much as you could. You now knew that Chan wasn't your soulmate and that was okay. He was still a wonderful person that was more than worth talking to.
Up next was Felix. Settling into your seat, you could feel your heart begin to soften all over again. Felix was gorgeous and the instant wink he gave you was enough to halt your breathing. This had to be the worst otome game ever.
"I'm Y/N," you nodded. "It's nice to meet you."
"And you!" Felix hummed, busy signing your album. "How are you today?"
"I'm doing very well, thank you," you answered, already prepared to rip off the band aid. "I've had one of your songs stuck in my head all morning."
"Oh yeah? Which one?"
"Why do I keep getting attracted...jaseok gachi kkeullyeoga," you sang a little more confidently. "I cannot explain this reaction."
Felix looked up. His expression was amused but held no sign of recognition. You took a deep sigh before nodding to yourself. At this point, it was almost a relief to get this part over with.
"One, four, three," a voice to the left of Felix sounded both in front of you and independently in your head. "I love you."
Looking over with wide eyes, you made instant eye contact with the singer. Han. You felt like the wind had been knocked out of you and judging by his expression, he had felt the same.
"Oh, come on," Felix joked. "You'll have them in front of you in a minute. Don't steal my time with Y/N."
Han, obviously not listening, stood for a moment before sitting back down again. His eyes remained on yours as he reached across the table and took your hands. Slowly pulling you toward the empty seat in front of him, you thought you would burst into tears. The stupid plan had really worked.
"Yah!" Felix gasped, directing a glare at Han. Out of your periphery, you could see Chan smack his arm and shake his head. The leader had easily picked up on what was happening.
"You found me," Han said slowly, lifting his hand to touch your cheek, but halted his fingers from actually making contact. His handsome face was full of a wonder that set your head spinning. He acted like you were a mirage in front of him, something that was too good to be true.
"It took me awhile to figure out where to look," you admitted. It was suddenly difficult to catch your breath. Glancing to Han's still extended hand, you chose to lift your own and lace your fingers together.
Han looked to your entwined hands as if it was a new and exciting discovery. What a novel idea, to hold hands so easily with someone you're meant to be with forever. "Because I'm so mysterious right? And discreet?"
You grinned, feeling a warmth flood your face. "I wouldn't say that, no."
Han grinned as well, completely entranced. "I've heard your voice for weeks, but it sounds so amazing in person."
"Sorry," you said with a wince. "I know I'm not the best singer."
"Neither am I," he laughed.
"Yeah right!"
"Seriously! I would take hearing your voice over mine any day."
"Well," you said quietly. "Now I guess you're stuck hearing it."
"Not stuck," he said, shaking his head vehemently. "Stuck means I don't want to be here. But right now? There is no place I would rather be."
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corrodedcoughin · 1 year
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little story about little Eddie and his 2 new friends | word count approx 2.5k | general audience rating | steve and eddie are kids and Wayne is a pushover
Wayne sometimes thinks it was a mistake, not taking in the boy. God no, he would never think of Eddie as anything other than an important and intrinsic part of his life, couldn't be without him, wouldn't want to be. 
No, what Wayne worries about is how his readiness to help Eddie feel loved might contribute to the boy's difficulty in making friends.
It was an innocent enough request, Eddie asked for a pet as all young children do. He was so small and so wide eyed, just a scrap of an 8 year old with more feelings than he knew what to do with. Wayne knew he'd never hold up against any request Eddie made but he liked to pretend to himself that he could. And while technically he never pandered to the boy, yes Eddie usually got what he wanted but in a way that suited their means. Or so Wayne tells himself. 
8 year old Eddie asked for a pet and a pet is what he got.
-
Eddie barrelled into the trailer door, backpack swinging off his arm and ready to be thrown into the corner. Planning to shoot off back out the door to do his usual; lift up rocks and inspect whatever bugs he could find, to grab sticks and imagine them as wizard staffs, to let his imagination finally run wild after hours of sitting still at a desk under too bright lights and too busy class rooms. In truth he wasn't really paying attention to the insides of the trailer, expecting it to be the same as always. It took a very pointed cough for Eddie to register that Wayne was unusually home from work, far earlier than normal, and a further loud clearing of the throat for Eddie to pay attention to what Wayne had placed on the kitchen table. 
Right in the middle of the table, sitting in a beam of sunlight, was a cage and in that cage was what would soon become, Eddie's very reason for being. He crept up close, almost as if scared that any sudden movements would prove the whole thing to be a cruel illusion. He was brought out of his reverie by a pink nose wiggling at the bars, whiskers attached and twitching as the rest of the rat appeared.
'is he-? is he for real?' Eddie said with a gasp, hands inching towards the door of the cage. 
Wayne had to suppress a laugh, trust this boy to be bowled over in wonder at a rat as if it were a puppy. He opened the contraption of the enclosure door and dipped his hand inside, allowing the rat to climb onto his palm. The guy from work assured him that this one was the most tame he had, inquisitive to a fault and oddly enough, desperate to be handled. Quite honestly, the perfect match for his well meaning but excitable nephew-near-enough-son. 
'Yeah, yeah kid it's for real. And he's a she.' Wayne lets the rat sniff at Eddie's hands, little pink hands finding a platform on Eddie's palms, clearly holding himself a still as possible but if Wayne knew this boy, and he did, he knows that Eddie is so close to vibrating out of his skin, that containing that much excitement must be killing him. 
'I don't care. Wayne, I don't! Can she sleep in my room? Does she know tricks? Can I teach her? What does she like? Can I take her to school? Please! Wayne!' He's started now, words pouring out of his mouth, tripping over himself to try and release every thought entering his brain at lightning speed.
'Woah, there' Wayne says pulling the rat up, cradling it in two hands, 'We got to be kind to her alright? She's only small. Doesn't know what loud noises are good and which are bad, okay?' He watches as Eddie nods vigorously, eyes never leaving the creature. 'Now you promised me you'd look after a pet so that's what's going to happen. She is your responsibility. That means cleaning, feeding and loving, got it?' Eddie nods again, tentatively reaching his hands up, the image of Oliver Twist springs to Wayne's mind. 
Wayne comes around the kitchen table, crouches down to Eddie on creaky knees and hands the rat over, filling Eddie's small hands with a heartbeat and fur. Eddie giggles, watching as the rat surveils the new patch of skin its found itself on. 
'Tickles, Wayne' and its said with such love and devotion Wayne almost feels his heart break 
'Yeah son. She does, doesn't she?' 
-
 Of course it takes less than a week and Eddie and Sam are inseparable. As soon as Eddie gets home he's itching for his furry friend, delighting in the way she scampers around the room, over his arms and anywhere she can get. No matter what though, she always comes back to him. She can be digging in to a particularly interesting crevice behind the couch but she'll always come running back when she hears Eddie make a noise.  
The thing is, Eddie is a pretty lonely kid. Not for lack of trying, don't get it wrong. Eddie tries to socialise he tries to talk to the other kids in his class, get them involved in his imaginary games and play pretend but being the new kid doesn't really do him any favours. Being the new kid that lives in the trailer park and a penchant for biting to show affection does him even less. 
To Eddie, its him and Sam against the world. He can come home and know that his best friend will listen to all his problems, will stay close and won't run away even when he's extra loud or being 'a lot' as his teacher like to tell him. He's so tired of being told to use his 'quiet hands', his 'inside voice' and every other subdued phrase they try to press on him. 
This particular day was a hard one, Sally Winters had said that Eddie was 'bad luck' and the word quickly spread around by recess. Eddie had thought he was making some progress with a couple of kids from the class, was thinking today might be the day that he finally got asked to play but that hope quickly got squashed. He had hopped up to the potential friends with a stick in his hand and a notion of being a pirate when they both looked at him like he was a monster, they couldn't get away fast enough. And Eddie couldn't find a place to hide quick enough before the fat and heavy tears fell from his eyes. 
It was a long day and home time was his only saving grace. 
Wayne knows somethings up, can tell in the way that Eddie isn't even really talking to Sam, hardly looking at the Tv despite the fact that Wayne very purposefully had put the cartoon Lord of the Rings movie on. The sure fire fall back he liked to keep in his back pocket. The trump card to get his kid happy. This time though? No luck. Looking at the kid makes a chasm open up in his gut, deep and full of overwhelming sadness that he just wants to stop, wants to find the solution to make this boy smile like the sun again. They don't talk much for the rest of the night but Wayne makes sure to stay close, stay awake in case he's needed. Eddie spends the time between dinner and bed sitting on the floor, side pressed up against Wayne's leg and playing fetch with bits of Wayne's whittling with Sam, not a word said. 
-
Eddie wakes up the next morning with a plan and a devil may care attitude. Oh so carefully he maintains his usual routine; says good morning to Sam, carts her around the trailer as he washes his face and wanders into the kitchen, placing her in her secondary cage so she can eat breakfast with Eddie and Wayne - Eddie was adamant that they couldn't have meals without her, 'she's part of the family!' and soft hearted fool Wayne Munson agreed and an additional cage was sourced. 
When breakfast is finished Eddie begins his usual rigmarole of dragging his feet to get out of his pjs and into his clothes, reluctant to grab his bag and go out the door. Same old protests as Wayne watches him walk out towards the school bus. 
What is a new addition to the routine though, is Sam Munson hiding up the sleeve of a school boy and about to go on a secret and very dangerous mission. A mission to survive the school day. 
Surprisingly, Eddie manages to keep Sam secret, keep her safe, the whole morning. He came prepared with snacks to make sure she was entertained and happy, he couldn't stand the thought of her being sad, her eyes get so big and her tail droops as well as her ears, it makes the whole of Eddie ache. But no, she's happy, or happy enough at least. 
So the morning goes without a hitch, Eddie making noises to cover up any squeaks and keeping a hand in his pocket to reassure Sam, stowed in the pocket of his hoodie. He knows he's seen as 'weird' so what's a few extra noises? They are let out for recess and Eddie breathes a sigh of relief, thinking this is his time to let Sam out, knowing she's desperate for some fresh air. Sure, she's peed in his hoodie pocket, but he can't really tell with it's dark colour and the layer of t-shirt between the wet material and his tummy. 
He runs off to his usual corner, stuck between a bush and a tree and gently tips Sam out of his pocket, she scampers around his feet and gratefully accepts a broken off bit of cracker between her hands.
'Thanks for coming with me Sam. Everyone is so mean, its so stupid. I don't care. You are a better friend than any of those losers' He crouches down, hoping to find a twig to play fetch with. A game that he delights in, is immeasurably proud of her for learning it so quickly. 'Gonna find you the best stick Sam. Promise. Best stick for the best friend' 
He continues muttering to himself and doesn't notice that he's getting progressively louder after finding a twig and beginning the game. Doesn't register that he's drawn unwanted attention with his happy shouts and encouragement until a body is crashing through the shrub he's hidden himself behind. 
Sam doesn't notice either until the unexpected form is right in front of her and she bolts, running as fast as her legs will carry her and Eddie is right behind her, muttering under his breath as he trips over his own feet in an attempt to catch her 'oh shit oh no oh no oh no' He's pushing himself as hard as he can but it doesn't count for much, he never was the fastest. He keeps trying though but then a faster body is accelrating past him, in a evident bee line for Sam. 
Without thinking, Eddie lets out a painful 'NO!' terrified of what might happen.
He knows people think rats are dirty, thinks they don't deserve love and don't deserve life. He doesn't want to imagine what this person's intent might be. Sam reaches a dead end up against the wall of the school and the body, the boy, stops infront of her. Scoops her up? Cradles her into his chest? Eddie...Eddie doesn't know what to think, he's prepared to fight this kid but then the boy is looking up at him with curious hazel eyes. Stroking Sam's head gently and with intent.
He holds Sam out, careful with his motions, trying to blow his brown floppy hair out of his face without disturbing the animal in his hands 'is she okay? is she yours? did I hurt her? she looks okay, is she?' Eddie gingerly steps forward and plucks Sam out of the boys hands, gives hera thorough inspection as the other boy continues 
'I didn't mean to scare her I swear! I didn't even know you had her! I won't tell, I swear I wont! You know...you shouldn't really have a rat in school. If I promise not to tell can I play with you? I'm Steve' 
Holding her close, Eddie squints at the boy, at Steve, and thinks. Thinks about how he looks nice, about how soft his hair looks and how he asked Eddie, Eddie!, to play, that he didn't give him a wide bearth and that he held Sam with such care. It isn't even a hard decision.
They spend the rest of recess together. Eddie shows Steve just how smart Sam. That she can play fetch, that she can run across one arm to the next, over your shoulders without losing balance. That she can twitch her whiskers and it seems like she's laughing at the joke Eddie tells her. That she laughs at the joke Steve tells her! Steve learns that she's named after somebody called Samwise and it doesn't matter that he's a boy because Sam is brave just like Samwise and smart and cares just as much. That Sam is Sam and Eddie is Frodo and together they can take on the world. 
Steve asks if he can have a name too and Eddie calls him Legolas, doesn't tell him why. Doesn't say that Steve reminds him of the pretty elves described in the books Wayne reads out loud to Eddie. It doesn't matter, not really. 
Recess ends and they shuffle back to the school doors, both of them lagging behind the others.
Eddie steels himself, knows he has to bring his misfortune up so that he can own in, so that his new friend doesn't find out from someone else. 'I'm bad luck you know. Sally...she said it. now everyone wont talk to me. I wont be mad if you don't either. I've got Sam. We'll be oaky! So you can just go, I don't care!' He knows he's getting wound up, he can't stop himself. He just wants the bandaid ripped off so he can start feeling sad quicker, get it over with sooner.
Before he can register is, Steve is wrapped around Eddie in a flash of a hug, careful to keep his tummy away from squashing Sam. 
'Not bad luck to me. See you tomorrow Frodo' Steve whispers next to Eddie's ear and shuffles through the school door. 
Eddie is in a daze of joy and happiness, thoughts rumbling through his head but none of them sticking as he journey back into his class room. Pure happiness radiating out of his body, he takes Sam out of his pocket and holds her up to his face 'Sam you made my bad luck go away!' kissing her on the forehead as he hears his teacher scream 
'EDWARD MUNSON IS THAT A RAT?!'
-
So Wayne thought the already unpopular kid having a rat would make things worse. Turns out, he was wrong. Very, very wrong. He might have to start pocket inspections before school though.
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also on ao3 if that's the preferred reading format for you
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billlydear · 2 years
Note
Hi ;) It's me again 😅 What about a fic where Reader has her periods and, you know, it's just Billy being there for her to help her get comfortable and taking care of her. 🥺 Maybe she is too embarassed to tell him at first but he notices she isn't feeling well so eventually reader tells him the truth to ease his worries. Like he doesn't get a damn thing about how periods work so maybe he goes to Max and asks her to give him some tips ? I know it's very scattered and a bit over the place, but I figured it would be very fluffy and sweet you know. 🤍 But of course you know best, so really if none of this inspires you be free to just ignore this 😅😂 Thank you so much ! Your fics make my shitty days better. 💕
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MOODY - BILLY HARGROVE X READER
W.C 1165 - INBOX (please request !) - GIF CREDIT TO OWNER
A/N: I'm so happy that you like my writing! I hope you enjoy this, too, I'm sorry it's a bit late 😅
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Max dreads the sound of Billy's heavy footfalls outside her door. They're light and stealthy when they need to be, but when no one else is home, Billy stomps around like a soldier.
She preps herself for an infuriating conversation before the door even opens, and when it does, it slams against the wall. It tries bouncing back, but Billy's arm stops it as he stands tall in her doorway.
"What?" She demands with narrowed eyes.
"You're a girl."
She fakes an incredulous glance down at her chest, "Oh my god. You're right! All this time, and I've never known."
"Cut it out." He snaps, eyes ablaze, "I mean, you're a girl. So you know how girls work."
"We're not all clones, y'know." She scoffs, "What, are you having trouble with Y/N?"
"Yes," Billy huffs, "She's in a mood."
"So? How am I supposed to help?" Max's nose scrunches, "She hasn't told me anything."
"Because you're always in a mood!" Billy finally crosses the threshold of her doorway, sitting on her bed even when she slams her feet against his leg to try and shove him off.
"Listen, I dunno what's wrong with her, she just gets off in her head or something, and she's all weepy and shit, 'real pissy. She refused to eat any of her lunch today just 'cause one of her chocolates melted and got onto her bag of chips. It wasn't even touching them, it was just on the package. And- and fuck, there's, like, no sex.
"Ew!" Max's mouth falls open, brows furrowing, "Gross! I- God, Billy. I mean, have you ever thought about asking her?" Max stares at Billy, unimpressed, "That usually helps."
"No, Maxine, I have not," Billy gripes, "Because it comes and goes. When I finally decide enough is enough, and I go to ask her, it is enough. She just goes back to normal."
"Well... Is it, like, a recurring thing, then? Like, every Friday or something? It could be a weekly quiz in a class she doesn't like, or a family dinner routine she's not thrilled about."
"Not even weekly," Billy muses, "It's, like, every couple of weeks or something. I dunno."
"Wait." Max finally folds the magazine she was reading shut, her fingers trapped inside to hold her place. She squints at Billy, "Your girlfriend has been getting pissy every few weeks, crying often, having intense mood swings for days at a time, and being... conservative with her body, and then like magic it just goes away one day?"
Billy calculates her words in his head, nodding silently.
"You're so stupid," Max guffaws, resuming her casual flip-through of a cosmopolitan she shouldn't have in the first place, "Go talk to your girlfriend, butt-brain. And whatever you do, don't act grossed-out."
--
"Spill." Billy demands, turning his head to stare at you where you sit in the passenger's seat.
"What?" You look over at him warily, "Spill what?"
"Whatever's making you all sad and shit," Billy waves a hand, and it hooks back onto the wheel despite not needing to. He's parked outside the movie theater, waiting for you to confess.
"I'm not- I'm not sad and shit, Billy." You promise, but the way your eyes widen momentarily makes him realize you're covering up, "Don't worry about it, okay? I got, like, no sleep last night. I'm just really tired."
"Yeah, well, I don't doubt that." Billy murmurs, running a thumb under your eyes. It catches the skin there, sensitive and baggy. "But there's something else. I.. I asked Max, and she said I should ask you."
"Oh." You supply lamely, cheeks burning at the thought of your boyfriend's younger sister knowing you're on your period. "Uh, it's really not anything super important, if you just wanna move on it'll be over in a few days."
"No," Billy shakes his head, curls flying, "I wanna know now. I'm trying to be supportive, don't you want to talk about it?"
"I- I appreciate that you're being supportive," You nearly cry, embarrassment flooding your chest that Billy takes as despair, "It's just.. kind of embarrassing? I'm- I'm on my period, okay? That's all. It's just making me a little crazy."
"Oh."
Billy, admittedly, does think it's gross. Not because of the whole misogynistic-natural-body-processes-are-gross type deal, but because he's only ever seen blood as a result of injuries like cuts, so thinking about it coming from your vagina makes his own parts ache, and not in a good way. Even if he knows you're not cut up down there, that it's natural and that the bloodshed itself doesn't hurt, it'll take a while to reprogram his brain's perception of blood. But he'll get over it, after all, you have to.
"O-kay," He drops one hand from the wheel, reaching out for your own that's laying limp in your lap. "So, like, walk me through this. My mom didn't stick around long enough to have any talks with me, and if Susan tried I'd kill myself."
"I just need to be sad sometimes, or- or irrational. Even if it seems silly to you, don't tell me that, it'll just make it worse. I have to get it out."
"Okay," He shrugs, "I already don't tell you when I think you're being silly, y'know. I'm not in the habit of insulting you."
"I know," You can't help the smile that curves soft over your face, "I just mean, like, stuff might seem really dumb sometimes. But just go with it, okay?"
"Okay." He repeats; a promise, "Oh- and, uh, sex is a no?"
"Big mess," You mumble, cheeks blazing, "Not worth it."
"Well- I think I'd like to be the judge of that," Billy stammers, "I don't mind a mess. I encourage it, actually."
"Not like this," You chuckle bashfully, "You do realize it'll get, like, on you, right? I'll just suck you off for the week, or something."
"That's not fair to you," His lips puff into a frown, "I don't care. Let's just do it, I can trash the sheets if it's really that bad."
"At least use a towel!' You groan, burying your burning cheeks in your hands. Billy isn't quite sure why you're so embarrassed by the prospect of bleeding on him. It's bound to happen eventually, he reasons, a leaky pad or a surprise visit, why not enjoy it?
"Towel. Smart." He grins, teeth shining bright under the dim streetlights outside the car, "So that's our plan, then?"
"That's our plan," You try concealing your smile when you lean in to kiss him, but it doesn't work, and instead you bump grins. He presses his lips to yours as best he can despite his smile, and you let your nose linger against his own for a second longer than you need to.
"Let's just make sure Max isn't home," You worry, but Billy's more preoccupied with peeling out of the parking lot and racing for home, "You owe her, big time for this one."
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diazheartsbuckley · 6 months
Text
WIP Wednesday Thursday ✨
So I’ve not been doing great ™️ lately. I’ve been insanely busy and I haven’t been writing much because I’m indecisive as hell and didn’t know what to do. I’ve also really been doubting my own skills, so yeah it’s been… a ride.
ANYWAY, enough complaining! I’ve got a new wip going (shocking I know!), called the asthma fic in which a fight between Buck and Eddie leads Buck to have an asthma attack despite not having had one for years 🥴
A huge shoutout to @tizniz who helped me brain storm this fic 💕 and thank you to everyone who keeps tagging me, you’re much appreciated 💕
(Snippet and tags under cut)
Despite only sitting at an arm’s length, Buck feels like he’s a world away from Eddie. Normally the silence is comfortable, it’s safe and sometimes even wanted after a long shift. But right now, Buck is counting all of the many times that his parents did this to him. Didn’t want to deal with him and his feelings. He has to give up counting - there’s way too many times that he remembers and probably just as many that he’s forgotten all about. Expect his body hasn’t.
He traces the back of his hand, carefully picking at the skin as he swallows dryly, Eddie still not speaking. Eddie doesn’t say anything until they reach the main road. Buck doesn’t dare to be the one to break the silence, afraid of the consequences and the wrath that he without a doubt deserves.
“Buck, what the hell?” are the first words out of Eddie’s mouth. He doesn’t even turn his head to look at Buck but Buck is watching him carefully, his small mannerisms that indicates that this time Buck really fucked up.
Eddie’s jaw is locked tight, his nails are almost digging into the leather of the steering wheel and he’s shaking his head a little, shaking it in disapproval, Buck knows that much. “You can’t just…” Eddie takes a deep breath, wanting to get ahold of himself but all of the emotions and words inside his head are welling over, breaking the dam.
“You can’t just do shit like that, you know? You can’t just change plans without telling me about it. Especially not when it’s about Chris” He speaks.
Buck nods vaguely, not Eddie can see it anyway. He knows how much Christopher means to Eddie, that he will always be his first priority which is also totally reasonable. He just doesn't want this to be the thing that breaks them.
He can feel the tears brimming in his eyes, threatening to fall as the tightness in his chest increases and he coughs lightly, trying to shield Eddie from the fact that breathing is starting to become an ongoing struggle.
“I know, I’m sorry. I should have talked to you about it” Buck says and glances at Eddie who scoffs and pinches the bridge of his nose again. It reminds him a little too much of his father, ignoring him and walking away if he became too much to handle. They didn’t care. They were so busy mourning the son that they had lost that they forgot to nurture the one that was left. Maddie. Maddie was always there for him. She never gave up on him.
Tagged by @watchyourbuck @honestlydarkprincess @daffi-990 @exhuastedpigeon @bucksbignaturals @theotherbuckley @cal-daisies-and-briars @dangerpronebuddie @diazsdimples 🩵 (consider this your tag for fuck it Friday)
Also tagging for fuck it Friday!! @disasterbuckdiaz @jeeyuns @thewolvesof1998 @wildlife4life @jesuisici33 @butraura @wikiangela @hippolotamus @steadfastsaturnsrings @slightlyobsessedwitheverything @monsterrae1 @evanbegins @vampbuckley @athenagranted @extasiswings @devirnis @eddiebabygirldiaz @elvensorceress @spotsandsocks @spagheddiediaz @buckbuckgoose @nmcggg @giddyupbuck @loserdiaz 🦋🩵
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A ghost face x child!reader who’s Sidney little sister?🤔
Seems like this anon and the last one are sharing same braincell.
I'm not sure if you meant ghostface Or Billy.... Or Stu.... Or the others.... So i decided to do this a little differently
Edit: I just realised this was probably supposed to be a head cannon but my thick skulled brain realised too late.
Ghostface x child! Sidney's little sister! Reader!
Warnings:
Relationship: platonic!!
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Ghostface was only seen as a serial killer whose sole purpose was wanting to be famous and popular. All about the movies. A killer with no other sole purpose or motive.
Out of the people the ghostface himself would've thought of being attached to, he never expected he would be attached to the younger sister of the girl he's going to kill.
The masked black robed knife wielding killer would find himself sitting somewhere near a tree with a small child next to him rambling about what's going on at home or at school.
He also finds himself listening or not at all. Most of the time focusing on the little person and wondering why he's sitting down with her instead of stalking and killing other people. He wouldn't think of killing the girl besides him, he isn't really fond of the thought of that.
But more of playing and interacting with the kid who he knows as "Y/n". Sometimes scaring her a little bit with the house phone at night. He doesn't mean any real harm from it.
Growing more attached than he ever thought he would've. Day by day growing more anxious at the idea of killing Sidney.
'What would she think? What would y/n do? Finding out the person who calls himself Ghostface, who has basically been your best friend, murdering your older sister?'
Through the thin fabrics of his mask, he watches intently at the two figures chatting. His leather gloves gripped tightly against the handle of his knife. Frustrated at himself earlier when he had quite some time convincing y/n that the killer who had been murdering people near where she lives wasn't him. Why was he so fixed on making sure the girl wasn't scared of him? What got him to act like this?
Y/n didn't even seem to be scared in the slightest. Her words ringing almost endlessly inside his mind.
"I know you aren't. Because you're my best friend, and my best friend would never do something like that!"
What would she do if she found out that yes, indeed her 'best friend' would do something like that.
Staring at Sidney reach out to grab something from the cabinets. Then looking over at the shorter girl who jumped excitedly at seeing her favorite snacks in the hands of her sister.
His leather gloves let go but the knife remains grasped.
Sighing, he stood up and turned around. Now listening to the sound the ground and boots make every time he takes a step. It seems he would have to delay a little further until he figures things out.
———————·
Despite his very edgy thoughts from above, he acts completely different around you.
You can practically hear him beam behind his mask, always running around carrying you at night and shit since he can't really go out in the morning.
Doesn't want you finding out his real identity cause what if you accidentally spill the beans? Then everything will be ruined. He wouldn't really mind if you mentioned him as ghostface only to Sidney cause it'll probably make her on edge more. But then she'll probably never let you out alone again.
So he made you promise and swear 20 times to never reveal his existence.
Also since this is Ghostface.. His way of loving (platonically here ofc) isn't exactly considered... Normal. Extremely dead set on making sure he doesn't do anything or spill anything to make you scared of him unless he knows you won't. Won't ever tell you the truth either until or unless he's cornered.
Does a lot of stuff with you. Either drawing, singing, dancing, cooking (in someone's house or yours when no one is home) or playing some random sports. (Unless it's in winter, he's SWEATING)
Every time you get a house call at night you're 99% sure it's from Ghostface. He either starts with something sounding series or straight up tells a corny pun.
Would get emotional whenever you verbally make it apparent that you appreciate him. Like fr.
He can't stand the thought of hurting you. Ever. (Plus he would probably technically murder someone who ever looks in your way a little wrong.)
You can tell him all your 4-12 year old problems and he would fix like.... 99.9% of them. (By murder and threats) and that one 0.1% is a real problem. (That he can't fix by murder and threats)
His urge for killing Sidney will be half nulled since he sees how close you two are. Overtime he'll be more and more unsure of what to do, he doesn't want you to hate him in any way.
But for the time being, he's just gonna cherish his time with you because he feels he's too far gone in the dark maze to back away and find his way out.
---------
Here's a Special Wednesday Post, I'm trying to cherish my time before the exams hit me. Have a good day :) !
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oneatlatime · 7 months
Text
The Awakening
Season 3 let's goooooooooo
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These Fire Nation cells are absurdly spacious.
I do love that Momo's first reaction is kisses.
Not a cell. Oops.
Well that was confusing. I was arguing so vociferously that the SWT weren't pirates and then they go and gank a ship.
Mai girl get it! Questionable taste in men, but I love to see a lady getting exactly what she wants.
Mai: "how are you?" Zuko: *existential dread* Mai: "babe. Shut up."
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Aang says he's the only one who's completely out of it, but Appa's behind him in full faceplant mode.
Actually, by the hair growth standard established by Zuko, Aang's been out 5 days at most.
Season 1 bitchy Katara is back again. I hate season 1 bitchy Katara.
I'm impressed by how much of these characters' identities is tied to their colour palettes. I see all these water tribe guys walking around in reds and blacks and I have no idea who I'm looking at.
Aang's eyes are back to brown this episode.
I love that Katara has no idea how she healed Aang. Superpowered does not mean superlearned. So much more believable than supergenius tweens.
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It's the old ladies! They're wearing croissants on their heads. Why not.
This is a cool way to do exposition. A royal proclamation narrating a flashback.
These Dai Li don't know shit about loyalty huh.
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SONG! HI SONG! I MISS YOU!
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CORNY BABY & FAMILY! HI CORNY BABY & FAMILY! I DON'T MISS YOU! My guy why haven't you unpacked yet.
Given the welcome Zuko gets from the Fire Nation crowds, I'm thinking the exact cause/terms of his banishment were never made public? They're hyping him up like a wrestling entrance. That doesn't track with someone known to be honourless.
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I want whatever's in Bato's bowl. Those noodles have him mesmerised. He's staring at them like they're telling him the secrets of the universe.
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Are you telling me that Appa successfully landed on the deck of one of these ships without sinking it?
I love how Gaang's reaction to everything going wrong is to go find their dad.
STOP GOING ON ABOUT THE INVASION PLAN. IT WON'T WORK. STOP.
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"Yep! The whole world thinks you're dead. Isn't that great!" Sokka. TACT.
Sometimes Sokka's brain gets too far ahead of itself.
Poor Aang. Not many people whose deaths are wrongly cause for celebration live long enough to see those celebrations.
How do the topknots fit inside the helmets?
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This is silly beyond words. It's a two second throwaway gag but they're so into it.
Aang saying "I hate not being able to do anything" to the girl whose whole existence was not doing anything until recently is certainly a choice. And honestly, wasn't Season 1 Aang's whole point not wanting to be the Avatar? Actual responsible adults are handling the problems for once. He should be ecstatic.
I just realised this Fire Nation disguise ship plan means there are people in the Southern Water Tribe who know how to run coal powered ships. Neat.
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One of the things I really love about Avatar is how much love they put into the side characters. This guy on the left is a nameless mook, but in the three to four lines of dialogue he gets, we see a world of political and bureaucratic headaches and a bunch of normal, humanising emotions (who hasn't been angry at that one coworker who can never be bothered to email?). The writers didn't have to give him that much personality, but they did!
Also, how often do Fire Nation ships get captured, if two pieces of bureaucracy not lining up causes this guy to jump to that conclusion, rather than think the bureaucracy messed up?
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Someone in the Fire Nation has invented extra buoyant metal.
Turtleducks are scared of Azula. Turtleducks are good judges of character.
An awful lot of this episode is flashback footage.
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Toph is a missile launcher. This is all I wanted out of life.
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For the first time ever, Aang gets to play the role that Sokka plays in every bending heavy battle.
Since when can Katara do bending moves this big?
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Sokka once again harnessing his ability to speak the opposite of what he wants into existence.
They said they passed through the serpent's pass a few days ago. Clever foreshadowing I completely missed.
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Don't you love it when all your problems cancel each other out?
Aang. This is not the hill to die on. Also please don't throw tapestries around in a room with unguarded candles until you can firebend.
Wow Aang is just taking all the wrong lessons from this. And he's stealing Zuko's lines.
Turns out the Firelord is just some guy with an unfortunate goat beard.
Katara finally gets a chance to be her age, complete with nonsensical emotions and misdirected anger. I hate bitchy Katara but I love seeing her expressing the root of that bitchiness. And I love how illogical it all is, and that she acknowledges that! Emotions ARE illogical and messy!
Contrasting Hakoda winning Dad of the Year with Ozai setting off every alarm bell known to man is a choice. A really good choice. But wow. Not subtle.
I knew Azula always lied, but to her own dad/Firelord too? That's a dangerous move.
Aang. What are you doing. Stop.
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Leave the door open. Peak sibling move.
In a turn of events that should surprise absolutely no one, Zuko's been played like a fiddle by his sister and is now as trapped as ever. The surprising part is that Azula thinks she can get away with lying to the Firelord too. Don't know how that's going to go for her long term.
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So much for me saying the Avatar universe doesn't do ghosts. This season opener is surprisingly backwards-looking.
No offense to ghost Yue, but I think the saving the world she's referring to is the time she and a massive fishman saved the world, not strictly Aang.
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How did they get past the blockade and find the right island?
I cringed at Katara's knee slide.
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How are they standing on that island or breathing the air if it's hot enough to do that?
Final Thoughts
...what was that?
Seriously. This episode was a disorganised and aimless mess with the occasional gold mine of characterisation bobbing around. Did the writers not have a plan for what would happen after season 2 ended? This episode feels like the writers had as much plan as the characters did. If I was feeling charitable, I would say that this episode was a hot mess as a metanarrative commentary on Aang and the world's state, but I'm not feeling charitable. I think this episode was just a hot mess.
First, the good bits.
I liked that Sokka was very in character. We've seen before how he can run away with an idea to the point that he forgets to mind the human element. This episode's Sokka felt very much like Sokka. I liked that the beat up Sokka quota was replaced with 'Sokka dares the universe to play chicken and actually wins for once.' His optimistic characterisation this episode didn't grate like his inexplicable optimism did in Ba Sing Se, because here he has a reason to be happy. He's got his dad and a plan. Being around his dad and their people has done him good.
I like Toph the Ballista.
I like the noodle hypnosis.
I loved Katara's emotional blow up. It doesn't matter how noble or important the cause, leaving your kids for a cause is still leaving. I love that she points out how illogical her emotions are being. And I love that Hakoda creates a no-judgement-all-comfort-safe-to-rant zone for her. She's been waiting to do that for a while, and some of it came out at Zuko last episode, so it's been established that she's at boiling point. Fun fact: Katara has now had emotionally fraught venting sessions at Hakoda, Zuko, and Jet if you squint. I don't know what to make of the fact that the show has grouped these men into the same category of 'safe for Katara to vent to.'
I liked a couple of the throwaway gags, and the throwaway characters.
I liked the framing of Zuko's reintroduction to his father. Great use of angles and shadows. We've had two seasons of build up to this guy as the Biggest Bad, and the scene of Zuko kneeling in the throne room while Ozai paces around and delivers the world's most menacing praise felt big enough to be the crowning glory of that payoff. Especially contrasted to the loving father daughter reunion of equals it was interspersed with. But...
The bad bits.
Why did they immediately undermine two seasons of hype and all of the episode's menace by showing the Firelord as a gullible idiot who can't spot a bold-faced lie coming from a tween? I am legitimately pissed off that they defanged him as a threat so soon after introducing him. And I don't think showing that Azula can successfully lie to the Firelord builds up Azula as a threat - I think it also undermines her, because it's a stupid move. This episode could have introduced the biggest bad and reinforced the threat posed by last season's antagonist. Instead, it completely neutered the biggest bad and made Azula look like an idiot. I am actually mad about this.
Other stuff I didn't like: Aang's whole deal. Of course he was going to lose his mind and not be ok about what went down in Ba Sing Se. But he's never this dismissive of his friends, and a huge part of his early character is the fact that he would absolutely love it if some qualified adults stepped in and did the job he was unwillingly born into. Aang this episode felt self-centred and out of character.
Zuko's usually not this dim. I had figured out the angle Azula was going for by the end of the turtle duck pond conversation. Why can't he figure out for himself why Azula has redirected the potential blame if Aang is found to have survived?
The pacing felt off. The A plot flipped between action set pieces and emotional stuff. The B plot was purely talking. But the action set pieces felt out of place in an otherwise quiet episode. I get that you need something to interest the 8 year olds hyped up on sugar who only want explosions, but I think this episode would have been a lot better without the 'Aang almost drowns but gets a pep talk from a couple of ghosts who say exactly what everyone else has already said to him for two seasons but for some reason Aang listens this time and it works.' Why couldn't we have had a quiet episode?
Speaking of, why are Roku and Yue randomly popping up? Last time Aang talked to Roku, it took a trip into the Avatar state and the destruction of a very stupid general's whole army base. The ONLY person who's talked to Yue since she died is Sokka, and that took a magic swamp. I just don't get it. I don't get why they were there, why they said what they did, why those particular words in that particular order worked on Aang when no one else's words were getting through. I don't get why hiding out in the Fire Nation is the plan of choice over chilling with the Southern Water Tribe (other than because the plot says no responsible adults allowed).
The action piece with the Snekky Boy was fun. Even if what set it off was contrived (which it was), I think it was a fun watch and the only action the episode needed.
This episode was also so dark that I spent more time contemplating how much I really need to clean my screen than watching stuff happen.
I got so pissed off at this episode that I totally forgot about Mai. Go Mai! I am WEAK for romance arcs that boil down to 'Girl sees boy. Girl wants boy. Girl gets boy." Go Girl! Like I said above, questionable taste, but if it's what she wants, then congrats on getting it. I love Azula noticed and is like 'my resident goth appears to be broken.'
I have decided that Toph carved an underground harbour like the refugee station on Full Moon Bay and stashed all the water tribe ships in there, because those ships are too pretty to scuttle.
If I could surgically remove that scene between Katara and Hakoda and insert it into some other episode, I'd never watch this one again.
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juyomiao · 1 year
Text
Only ONE - sung hanbin x gn!reader
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16 ☆ one punch man
< prev | masterlist | next >
chapter warnings: yn punches someone 😁 , written part is shit omg , yeji is mean im sorry yeji fans im sorry midzys forgive me , one (1) xanax mention
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written part under the cut (~ 836 words)
this is not your proudest moment. listening in on someone's conversation, really?
but the need to know what's going on is stronger than any morals you might have. especially when you don't trust anyone in the student council except yourself. and hanbin, but he isn't being exactly cooperative lately.
"beomgyu, you always knew i liked hanbin. why are you acting like this is surprising in any way?" you aren't exactly a genius at recognizing people by their voice, but you can clearly tell that's yeji.
"are you serious? of course i knew, but that doesn't make anything you did correct! you're trying to ruin someone else's life over your feelings, if it wasn't for yn-"
something is telling you to take out your phone and record this. if you're going to snoop in someone else's business, might as well get a confession from the actual culprit out of it.
"there you go, it's always about yn this, yn that… do any of you ever get tired? if they weren't part of the student council this wouldn't have happened in the first place! it's their fault!"
"it's no one's fault but yours, yeji."
there you have your proof, you mentally - although reluctantly - thank beomgyu.
"see? you're on their side too! you hate them just as much as i do, you should be thankful i'm doing all of this!"
yeji dislikes you. you let the information sink in for what feels like an eternity, of course you knew it was like that the moment you found out she was behind all this, but you assumed it was all over her stupid crush on hanbin. no, hwang yeji just admitted she dislikes you.
you were never exactly desperate to be anyone's friend, or to be liked by everyone you met, but both of those things were never hard for you. or at least, you thought so until today.
your brain tunes out the rest of the conversation, as you silently stand right by the door, your phone still recording 
"y/n?" a voice snaps you out of your thoughts, you blink quickly a couple of times, meeting woobin's eyes. "are you okay?" you nod with a small smile "yeah, i just…"
you hear faint murmuring coming from the room, the silence enough for you to pick up a small 'they're here?' that clearly belongs to yeji.
you sigh, finally stopping the recording on your phone and hiding it deep into your backpack before something happens to it. you might be a bit paranoid, but with what yeji has been able to pull so far you wouldn't be surprised if she went that far to destroy the major evidence in your hands.
"yn!" and with that, she's back to the normal yeji you know, your friend. "hi yeji," you can't lie for shit, and everyone there can clearly tell something is up, not only between you two, but overall. beomgyu is on the verge of speaking and probably spill every single thing he found out about yeji, but you keep talking before he can "I wanted to talk to you, but you left my texts on read. is everything okay?" if she wants to act fake, you can too.
"oh about that…. i'm sorry, i had some issues with my phone and couldn't answer your texts," somehow, that small lie sets you off "you have issues overall."
"what?" you can see beomgyu trying to hold back his laughter, turning around to face the wall with a hand over his mouth. "you heard me. you have a ton of issues, because whatever stupid crush you have on hanbin, or your hatred for me, or anything else, shouldn't push you to do everything you did."
"i don't know what you're talking about, yn,"
"yes you do. want me to get the chats? or maybe i should get them from your phone," yeji rolls her eyes. it's only for a split second, but you can tell the more you corner her the more her mask slips off, and the truth will inevitably be uncovered.
the following minutes are a blur to you. yeji keeps making excuses, saying your accusations are baseless, until something tips her off. you don't know what it is, she probably doesn't know either, but she admits to everything.
she admits to stealing the money, framing hanbin, being behind the anonymous number, spreading the word of hanbin stealing through the whole school.
"he was the one who offered to help me cover it up! he felt bad i had to resort to stealing, so he said he'd take the blame if anyone found out!"
"and you took advantage of this and made sure everyone found out," you point out.
she keeps making excuses, saying anyone would've done the same in her situation - failing to realize not anyone has the morals of a rock - how you 'shouldn't act like you're so much better than her, you've probably done worse' . you don't know what took over you, but that's your last straw and, before you can think it through, you punch her.
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☆ note: this was wayyy too late im sorry pookies :( i hated the written part ,, well ! see u with a new chapter in ,, whenever i have wifi again idk
☆ SYNOPSIS: sung hanbin is everyone's dream guy: perfect grades, perfect looks, perfect personality, he has it all. he's even class AND student council president! everyone loves him, and you, as his vice-president, are no exception to that. having been in love with him since you were 12, you try to tone down your feelings "for the sake of professionalism" and claim it's simple admiration for someone who objectively has no flaws. but there is one small detail you missed, in all these years admiring him: he has an even bigger crush on you.
☆ TAGLIST: (italics = couldn't tag) @hananovi @soobeaniee @idkwatodoanymore @huipinkhair @homohoons @sunnyglower @lethalvenus @sunoksunny @tocupid @deafeningtyrantmilkshake @winteringdream @ikeryn @ilovechanhee @thesiriusmap @heelanat @baekstans @blaycke @vernonfernandez @8turning @yeolsbestie @asteroidchenle @hvnyujiq @hikyeom @r4innoms @enhypen-scholarship @sulkygyu @meowrinz @rikimylove @ridinhyuck @lumixen @neohyxn @ceanairy @beomibeom @cherriegyu @sunwcloud @k4hzuhas @annoyingbitch83 @stickersim @dreamyyn @anawesomeaquatic @softforjungwoo @utopiakys @247hrs @sunswoonie @minhui896 @chanhee-hee @nxurxn @peachysohn @kpoprhia @haesunflower
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One of these days I'll finish writting the fanfic of this tiny Trans Reversed-Love Square Miraculous Ladybug AU that has been eating my brain:
— Adrien Agreste is Kitty Noir. Reclusive homeschooled rich supermodel by day, Paris superheroine by night.
—Adrien thinks of Kitty as just a persona he can play with, like a videogame avatar. ('It tootally doesn't mean anything that Kitty feels right, and like home, and like freedom, what are you talkikg about guys?' )
—Kitty is Ladybug's partner in fighting agains crime. Kitty brings the 'there's always time for a joke' vibe to the superhero work that Ladybug pretends not to appreciate.
—One night, Kitty is saved from an akumatized villain attack by a civilian named Marinette, and is heartstruck by her kindness and bravery. (Ladybug was busy that night, if you can believe it.)
—Kitty visits her at her balcony the next night, and Marinette tells her about feeling lonely at school. Kitty knows loneliness, and their night meetings at the balcony become a common ocurrence.
—They become friends. One night, Kitty flirts. Marinette responds (Because tonight she is just a normal girl with a normal life, why wouldn't she?) And Kitty well, she is kind. Her jokes aren't cruel, and she listens to her.
—And Kitty likes the way light hits her hair, and how clumsy and determined she is. Is this what having a friend is like? Wishing time would stop so she could keep lisening to Marinette?
—And ups! Kitty is getting close, and moving in circles around Marinette and Marinette feels safe. Kitty is kind of funny. And Marinette realizes she wants some funny in her life.
—Kitty leans. Marinette kisses her. She is not sure why she did that. Oh! Marinette retreats, but Paris at night makes Kitty's green eyes shine like stained glass. Wait, does she like girls? Does she like this girl?
—Kitty kisses her again, and Kitty is in heaven. Alone. Alone is a far away word. For a second the whole world feels like home. But stop.
—Kitty (or Adrien?) pulls away. 'Because this isn't right' 'Because you are just my fan, you don't know me.'
'Because Kitty isn't real... right?'
—Kitty leaves. Is not ethical, it can't be. They both agree. Just friends. 'Sometimes, I'll catch a glipse of you in the moonlight.'
—Marinette, see, now she was a problem. Ladybug can't be in love with her partner, no way. Is not right, is too distracting. And they have people to save!
—So Ladybug pretends everything is ok. 'Kitty, we have to be focused at all times' she tells her, trying to ignore how pretty her smile is.
—But duty is first, Paris is counting on them. Even if Kitty calling her 'My Lady' keeps her awake at night. 'All girls fantasize about their friends like that, right?'
—Adrien sits on his bed, and thinks about what would happen if he could be Kitty all the time. If Kitty is just a character, just a game, why did it felt so good, so real, to kiss Marinette?
—Marinette liked Kitty, and Kitty wasn't even trying. 'You are so beautiful, you know that, right?' She had said one night, laughing, after Kitty had make her dance. So spontaneous, she had blushed after.
—He was allowed to like that thought, right? Kitty was beautiful. He (she?) was beautiful. 'Am I, beautiful?' How much of Kitty is acting, and how much of her is true?
—Kitty doesn't visit often now. Marinette overthinks. 'She moved on, of course she did, why wouldn't she, I said it was ok, why doesn't it feel ok?'
—One day, Ladybug "accidentally" sees Kitty sneak into the Agreste Mansion. Oh! So she really meet someone else. 'She used to sneak into my house like that' And she meet no other than golden boy Adrien Agreste. Supermodel Adrien Agreste. Rich and Misterious Adrien Agreste.
—Of course, I mean, this Adrien guy is kinda cute. And Kitty is cute. Match made in heaven right? Is non of her buisness anyways.
—But Adrien is a little too misterious, right? He doesn't even go to school! And what was that Alya told her the other day? Oh! He is friends with Chloe?? Too suspicious...
—Is ok, she is just worried about Kitty. They are partners, gals, Marinette just wants to make sure Kitty's boy is the right one. 'What does she sees in him anyways?'
—Adrien meets Marinette one day, at a gala, she designed a hat for him! She is wonderful, and Adrien wants to say hi, but she keeps avoiding him. 'Is just the nerves for the event, she toootally didn't roll her eyes at me.'
—Adrien meets Nino. He is great. He tells him about school, and Adrien dreams about how cool it would be to go to school. He asks his dad, and he actually considers it?
Nino supports him, even Chloe vouches for him. Father says yes, he can go to school!.
—Adrien arrives at his first day, and oh! There is Marinette! How great is this!
—Marinette raises her head, and oh! There is Adrien Agreste! How great is this?
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lovearne · 2 years
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guilt
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captain john price x fem!reader
Warnings: body dysmorphia, themes of poor mental health, comfort, reader is mentally unwell, Simon is a softie, price is the best husband™️, age gap, talks about mental health, small talk about sex, reader hates her body, no use of y/n
My page is 18+ only. I don't tolerate minors here, this is my safe place to express myself, and I don't consent to minors viewing my works or my blog.
Words: 4k
Diclaimer: if you have poor body image, please tread carefully, I wasn't doing well and wrote this to cope. Yall are beautiful and I love you.
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You've been… off the past few days. You didn't understand why, why you felt the way you did, or why you haven't had the energy to clean the house. Why you hadn't been motivated for anything. When you get like this it's hard to really do anything that requires you to work your brain or anything really.
You've been like this more times than you remember, and you never really remember coming out of it, like your just constantly feeling bad, and then one day you feel good. It's annoying really.
Today was neither the day it started or the day it will end, you don't remember when it started really. You just feel exhausted. It didn't help that you married a man that has four son like people in his life. They were constantly in and out of your house when they weren't on deployment. And constantly in and out of the house you and Price had for when he was on base.
You just couldn't handle it today. You'd known John for a few years, dated for 2 years and married for 6 months. In all that time, you don't remember ever once feeling like this around him. He was off deployment, yet he still got up everyday to run with the boys, meaning he was up before you. Meaning he'd be expecting to come home to a nice made breakfast, but instead you couldn't get out of bed. You didn't want to be yourself at the moment. You felt bad for feeling that way too, you felt guilty, because you love the life you have with John. You have everything you could have ever asked for, it's just your head.
You don't know how you could ask for help either, not that you wanted it anyway. You wanted to know how to make this go away, you hate feeling like this, it just drives the guilt up more. And soon there are tears in your eyes. You huff and wrap the blankets around you tighter, pulling them up to your chin, closing your eyes. You fade back into sleep, hoping to wake up numb or happy.
"Hey babe!" John greets as he walks into the front door, the boys in tow. He stops as he doesn't smell the breakfast you normally make. Was something wrong?
He was followed by the boys as he enters the house, walking to the kitchen.
"Babe?" You weren't there, something must've been wrong.
He continues to sweep the house for you, you were nowhere downstairs you must be having a shower upstairs.
"Boys, I'm gonna go see if she's upstairs. I'll be back." He tells them.
Walking up the flight of stairs he can feel himself growing more and more worried each step. More so when he can't hear the shower running. Maybe you were having some personal time in your shared room.
He knocks on the door first, incase you didn't want him to walk in. When you don't answer he frowns even more. The door slowly swings open, he can see you, bundled up and asleep. He smiles. Relieved as he walks over to you.
Sitting beside you on the bed, he admires your form as you sleep. His face is warm as his heart is. You've slept in, you weren't in danger. He feels the weight of the world fall off his shoulders.
His warm smile is the first thing you see as you wake up, and feel even more guilt. "Hey pretty girl, good mornin." He says softly, a warm smile on his face. "Do you want a cuddle?" He asks. You shake your head, feeling more guilty. "That's alright darling. Do you want some food? I can make you something if you want." You shake your head again, the guilt your feeling was immense.
"I just wanna stay here please." You surprised yourself with how level and soft you kept your voice. Almost whispering, just as he was talking to you. He smiles and replies.
"OK darling. Do you want me to stay?" You shake your head. "OK baby, I'll be downstairs OK? Just call for me if you need anything." You nod. He leaves a kiss on your forehead and leaves the room, turning the light off and closing the door slowly. You start crying as the door closes, the guilt overwhelming you.
"Did ya find her?" Johnny asked as he walked down the steps. Price nods.
"I don't think she's feeling very well today, lads." He addresses the group.
"Maybe we should make her some breakfast then?" Kyle adds in. John smiles at the young man.
"I think she'd like that. I say go for it." The boys set to work, making some eggs, French toast, pancakes, bacon, and sausage. Simon made the pancakes, Johnny was on meat duty, Kyle made the eggs and French toast, and John toasted the bread.
They were done pretty quickly, you having invested in griddles and an extra stovetop on the island.
You and John had bought this house and started renovations while you were still dating. He has been deployed when most of the demo had been done, he was only supposed to be gone for a month at most, he bad needed to head out on a special mission. You decided to put yourself to the test and worked on the house yourself. You had most of the house put back together, after getting what needed professionally done. You were painting the drywall and sheetrock when Price had came home. He was 3 weeks late coming home, and he was surprised when be walked in and the house looked more like a house than it did when he'd left. That night the two of you had a paint fight. It was one of your favourite memories.
John shakes out of his daydream as the boys alerted him they were all done and ready to eat. He smiles.
"I'll go get my wife." He says to the three of them. Ghost watched him intently while he left, turning to soap and gaz, no, Johnny and Kyle when he was out for earshot.
"Somethings up. " He states. Johnny nods his head.
"I agree, it's 10am and she hasn't even came down for coffee yet. The pots still full!" The boys knew your and John's schedule like the back of their hand. They knew when Price left in the morning, he'd put a pot of coffee on for you, a nice surprise when you woke up. You'd nor.ally wake up around 7:30 or 8 and have a few cups before they arrived.
"Do you think she's OK?" Kyle chimed in. Simon hums.
"I dunno."
"I hope she is. She's too nice to be not ok."
"The world hurts nice people the most Kyle." Simon's voice was almost sobering, the scars on his face showing wisdom in such an area.
The boys get to work in setting the table, placing the food nicely when done.
You were standing in front of the mirror, your eyes red as you pulled and prodded at areas of your body that you loathed. Pockets of fat, dips in your hips, your chest that is never quite what you wanted it to be. The tears flowing as you try and stuff the fat on your stomach into place, wanting it to disappear. You hated the way you looked and it wasn't hard to see.
You shouted in your head, all the nastiest words and hateful comments you could think of, any that your siblings used against you, or terrible kids at school growing up, terrible people now, your own parents. You yelled at yourself in the mirror for what felt like ages. You wanted to get up and go cuddle into John. You had gotten up to seek him out, wanting to watch him as he did his daily life. You wanted to snuggle in his lap as he smoked a cigar out on the deck, or lay your head on his lap as he read his current book.
When you stood, you made the mistake of looking in the mirror. You didn't see what you seen some days, instead you seen the goblin that stood in your place. Very rarely did you think you were beautiful, but it's not normally this bad. Looking in the mirror had set you off and you couldn't stop nitpicking yourself over every insignificant thing.
You thought yourself as ugly, your body and your personality. The one you portray everywhere day couldn't have been your true one, could it? Not if this version of you was always there, always lurking, waiting and ready to pounce everytime you thought you looked bad or anytime you did something wrong, and made it worse.
"Love?" Your thoughts are interrupted by a knocking. You quickly jump into the closet, trying to hide your red face and tears away from the man that you love. He couldn't see you like this, he couldn't see the monster you became when your brain lost the battle. You didn't want him to see such an ugly part of yourself.
So you hide yourself, hidden in between his clothes, you breath in his scent. Even though these clothes were washed, that damn cigar smell stayed. You breathed in the comforting scent of your husband's favourite cigar. Wrapping yourself in one if his coats, you cuddle into it, trying to ignore the man himself.
"Love? You in here?" You could hear John walk around the bedroom. His footsteps nearing the walk in, his hands rested on either nob of the door. "Love? May I come in?" You answer back a yes.
He swings the doors open softly.
"There she is!" He laughed, his tone soft and loving. You smile, hoping your blotchy face could pass as you being sick.
"Here I am." John can tell. You don't know that he knows, but he knows that you don't know. He can tell something is not adding up. Your smile doesn't reach your eyes, and the light that's normally there isn't. It cools him to the core. He needs to help you.
"Hey love, the boys made you breakfast, you fancy coming down?" You sigh, unable to keep your struggle internal. You close your eyes and nod, as if it's almost painful.
"Perfect," he smiles brightly at you. "You might wanna get dressed love, while I love looking at your perfect body, nobody else will get the chance." Your face blushes as he draws attention to your body. He took that as a good sign that you enjoyed his teasing. But it only made you think of why you hate your body, leading to how you hate yourself. You shake your head.
You walked over to John's drawers, pulling out his sweats and a comfortable burgundy shirt, you put them on. They were loose enough, you supposed. You didn't bother putting on a bra, you didn't want to take up more space than you already thought you were. You turned around to see John had been ogling you the whole time, a comfortable smile on his face, love in his eyes. You blushed again and tugged the clothes nervously.
"C'mere beautiful." He takes your hand I'm his softly, kissing the back of it, then leading you to the kitchen. Down the stairs, and through the hallway, you seen the shadows of the boys before them. Johnny, Kyle, and Simon. Your husband's adoptive sons. That makes you their figurative mother, though they treated you more as a sister. There was an age gap between you and John, you being younger than Kyle and Soap. You were in your mid 20s, they were in their late 20s, so you weren't that much younger.
John wasn't twice your age, but he was a good few years older than you, he took care of you, and you took care of him it's how you two worked.
"There she is!" Johnny yelled as he came at you quickly, he pulled you into a hug, and suddenly you fell into a bigger pit of guilt. You gently push at his chest, but let him hug you. That's the least you could do, even though the last thing you want right now is a hug. You sniffle, and then cough a little, just to maybe play off as being sick rather than letting anyone know that your head was at war with itself.
Kyle was the next one to give you a hug, he smelled of old spice and breakfast, you felt even more guilt. These men ran for a few hours and then came over to make themselves breakfast that you normally have made for them. He patted your back as you stood there, your hands trapped under his arms, your eyes settling in the ceiling.
Simon nods at you, and you find yourself looking away instead of nodding back, or asking for a hug like you normally would. You didn't even let John touch you this morning and the two forced hugs you didn't want to repeat. Simon seems to be the only one who realized what was going on with you. You sat through breakfast, nodding along with John as he complimented the boys cooking. The whole time Simon watched you, he studied your manurisms, deeming them the same as his on his bad days.
So, as John, Johnny and Kyle tidy up after breakfast, which you barely ate any of, Simon offered you to come outside for a smoke. You don't smoke, but he does. It's odd when he wants company, but no matter how you were feeling you'd never say no to sitting with him. You know how bad his ptsd and anxiety/paranoia are.
"So," he begins. "I know what's going on." He says, causing you to panic and feel more guilt.
"It's not what you think." You rush, your voice panicked.
"I know what hating yourself looks like sweetheart." You look away from his face, immensely ashamed he'd caught you. "Why do you hate yourself?" He asks. You just furrow your brows at him. "What do you hate about yourself?" He clarifies.
"I don't wanna talk about it." You try and brush it off.
"I know." He nods. "You eventually got me to talk to you about why I hate myself. So I'm not leaving until you tell me." He states.
"I can't." He nods again.
"I know." You sit in silence for a while, he's had a few cigarettes now, his legs dangling off the deck, arms rested on the railing, you sitting the same way.
"Simon?" You say, after gathering your courage and forcing yourself to talk. He turns his head toward you slowly. "I don't have a good enough reason to hate myself." You say. He frowns.
"Whatever reason you have in your head is enough. You don't have to have been through war to hate yourself love." He explains. "And I'll never judge you for it, ever." He says. "All trauma is valid, and all mental health matters." You recognized some of your own words being quoted back at you.
"I don't wanna say." He nods.
"That's alright, do you wanna talk about why you stayed in bed today and barely ate?" You frowned.
"I'm too fat." You say. It's his turn to frown.
"Who said that?" He asks in disbelief.
"Everyone."
"No, I know for sure I didn't say that. And if Price did-"
"John didn't!" You interrupted, he nods. "Just, since I was little. I guess I've always been an easy target." You try to laugh but it's more of a cry.
"Childhood trauma." Ghost remarks.
"It was just bullying." You are quick to defend, why are you quick to defend the people who made you hate yourself?
"No, I know what you're doing. You didn't deserve any word or action of that." Simon could read you better than your husband could.
"How do yo-"
"You are the sweetest person I've met." He starts. "You're so welcoming and understanding. There is nothing wrong with you." That's what you think. You bitterly thought.
"What if there is? What if the reason I feel so bad is because there's something wrong with me?" You break. "My brain turns on itself Simon, it starts to eat away at me, my confidence, my self image, my everything. And I don't know how to stop it." There are tears in your eyes that you hold back.
"Oh love." He pulls you into his chest, a hug from Simon is rare, and you start to sob into him. "It's ok, let it out." He rubs your back, "I'm here for you." Hes learned a lot from you in the past 2 and a half years, a lot of everything useful he didn't have before. He was also your best friend. Sure John is your husband, but you and Simon got on best, in platonical ways. You've joked before that Simon was your soul friend, a platonic soulmate. You knew John was your soulmate in the literal sense, but you understood Simon easier than anyone else on the planet.
John came outside to have a cigar after washing the dishes and watching the other two boys fight for half an hour over who was drying and who was tidying the kitchen. He was alarmed when he heard you sobbing, but relaxed when he saw Simon consoling you.
"I just feel so guilty Simon." Your voice was wrecked, throat raw with emotion.
"Why's that love?"
"I want to be the perfect wife to him, I want to keep up on house work, I want to give him kids, I wanna be there all the time for him. I want to be able to have a desirable body, so that maybe one day he doesn't wake up disgusted with me, like I wake up disgusted by myself." John's heart cracks, deep in his chest. He staggers, as if he'd been shot.
"Hey," Simon grabs your hand. "You have a desirable body." You scoff.
"No, I don't." He hums.
"You do actually. Very desirable. Most of my partners have been bigger. More cushion you know?" He asks. "I like being comfortable and confident that my partner can hold my body weight without it crushing them. Cause darling I weigh a lot. And so does your husband." He states, John smiles at your small smile.
"But what if he wakes up one day and decides he does like my weight, the rolls of fat I have, the ugly fat deposit I have over my butt. What then Simon?" Simon looks you deaf in the eyes.
"I'll just kill him." He says that like it's the most important thing in the world.
"You can't kill my husband!" You shout at him.
"Do I want to? No. But if he hurts you? There isn't anywhere he could hide from me." Simon says. "You are my best friend, don't tell Johnny that. You are number one. Ok? If you need something, I'm here. If someone needs to be killed, I don't care who it is. I will kill them for you." Simon comforts you, his seriousness making you smile, and that smile reaches your eyes. John watched on. Oddly comforted by the fact that if he ever treated you bad, that Simon would be there. He needed to know that you'd be protected as well, if something ever happened to him.
"Oh Simon." You cry and pull him into a hug. "You're the best friend I've ever had." John smiles, seeing you momentarily happy.
"Now, I think you should tell your husband about how you're feeling. He can help as well." Simon states.
"It'll be gone in a few days, maybe I can just fake being the regular me."
"Absolutely not." John interrupted.
"John." You had horror written on your face as he approached the two of you.
"Hey baby," he smiles at you, the pure look of love shining through his eyes. "We have some things to speak about." You shake your head.
"Can we talk about it later?" You ask, he tilts his head as if thinking about it.
"I think it's better if we talk now, yeah?" You sigh. "Simon, I will take over from here, you can go now." He said to the larger man. Simon cocked an eyebrow, but left. John comes to sit beside you, his leg touching yours.
The two of you just sit like that for while, Basking in the sun, and the cool weather outside. Your thoughts were full of times that John had told you you were beautiful, times where you believed him, times where you had to stop the negative thoughts, and times where they won over. Then the tines where he told you he loved you flooded in, you believed him each and every single time, there were times where your mind was against you, and he'd said it and you had thought negatively about it.
"So," he starts. You look at him, not quite meeting his eye. "What's happening baby?" You smile bittersweetly at him.
"Sometimes my brain attacks me." You say. He laughs a little.
"OK, darling wanna tell me how?"
"It makes me feel so bad, like this morning. I couldn't get out of bed until you came and got me. I just didn't have motivation to do anything." He nods. "It's so paralyzing sometimes. The way my brain feels. And then there's the guilt. The guilt for not doing anything all day, for not talking to you, or not doing chores, or not doing anything. Wasting the day away."
"Baby," His hand on your thigh grounds you. "You don't ever have to feel guilty. I understand." He says softly. "I need you to know that you can always talk to me about these things." He says. You make a mental note to never.
"I don't want you seeing that part of me." You whisper, your voice failing you.
"Why baby?"
"It's the ugliest part. I can get so mad at you and say things that I don't mean." He smiles.
"You think I don't have a part of me like that?" He says. "I do, it's rare that it sees the light of day nowadays, but I manage it. You know how I do?" He asks. You shake your head. "I've been going to therapy for a few years now. It's helped me a lot. I wouldn't have married you if I was still the same man I was then. I can ask if we can book you in." He says. His smile was small and comforting again. "I don't mind if you don't want to talk to me about these thoughts and feelings. I do think you need to talk to someone about them though. My therapist is very neutral and easy to talk to." He adds. You look at him, wondering how you've known him for years and didn't know he struggled like you do.
"You never told me that." You say.
"No," he shakes his head. "It's not the same as what you are struggling with, but everyone fights their own battles. Even with their own brains." He says. You admire his wisdom.
"John," you start. "I love you." He smiles, big and happy.
"I love you too sweetheart." He kisses the side of your head. "What do you say we send these boys home, and then spend the day doing anything that we find fun. Get your mind off the bad?" You nod.
"We could play Mario kart?" He nods.
"Of course Mrs. Price." He confirms. You blushed deep red. You always did when he talked to you like that. "And just so you know, no matter what size you are, I will still love you and want to fuck you until you cry. You are the only person I want. I am yours." He kisses away your tears.
"I can't believe we've been married for six months." You say. "I'm still getting used to being Mrs. Price." He smiles.
"Well I could just call you mine." He teases.
"You can call me whatever you want handsome." He laughs. Suddenly the world feels a lot more bright, as the guilt lifts completely off your shoulders, letting yourself enjoy the company of your husband, your temple resting on his collarbone as he presses a kiss into your hair. The two of you sit there, watching the birds as they fly through the air. You were gonna be just fine with him by your side.
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