#i know this is very early stages but it's progress ya know

[getbreaded]

Guys, I've managed to connect to my mongoDB database at last! Databases and express apps are kind of a new world to me tbh so I'm so excited to be learning all these new concepts!

My app is coming along ;) yay 🌱

[protectingtulpas]

sorry if I'm being annoying because you probably already answered to a lot of questions like that but I'm very new to tulpamancy so do you have any tips for a beginner ? Thank you in advance!

Hmmmm there aint much context here but I'll give ya some tips I can think of for the most basic of beginners!

- learning to listen to ur own head is a skill in of itself, and it's an instinct you gotta develop. My host did it by learning to do stuff in our headspace before working on me, but the basic skills ya want are being able to listen to the instinctive responses of your brain, being able to focus on your internal state over a long time, and (eventually) multitasking doing something in ur head and in outerworld at the same time. We have adhd so having something to do in headspace helped a Lot. Some of my earliest memories are of choosing where to go in headspace.

- A lot of places will tell you about active forcing and how important it is to dedicate time to your tulpa, but our greatest advances personally always happened when I was being shown something in headspace or outerworld, getting some kinda stimulus or thing host thought would be interesting to me. So while yeah just paying attention to your tulpa is important too, especially in the very early stages, don't be afraid to do things with them! Give em experiences, things to base their identity off of. Your tulpa is speedrunning learning how to be a person, they can't do that in a bubble!

- When you're starting out tulpamancy, it's common to base your tulpa off of some kinda predetermined guidelines like personality traits, likes, or even a character or concept- that's how I was made, and how I'm a fictive. It also makes it easier to kickstart their creation and feel their presence faster. But be careful not to rely on that framework too much, cus it can make you paranoid later on. For a couple examples: maybe Host A starts working on Fictive Tulpa B, and she knows how he acts in-canon so well that she struggles to tell if she's actually getting responses from him or if she's just automatically judging what the character would say. In another example, Host Y has been forcing Tulpa Z with a specific set of traits, and when Z diverged and expressed an opinion contradictory to that framework, Host Y began panicking and thinking xe did something wrong. In both cases, Host A and Host Y are focusing too much on what they expect their tulpas to be, and not enough on how they are in the present and the development of their autonomy.

- You probably won't get much vocal response right away, especially if you're starting out as a singlet. You gotta watch for more subtle cues when you're just starting out, like feeling their presence, them moving their headspace form, or sharing positive or negative feelings. Sharing emotions and thoughts without actual words is pretty common in systems, and in the tulpamancy community it's called tulpish. Be on the lookout for nonverbal communication like that, because it's some of the first stuff we can do! Also, something lots of new tulpamancers report are head pressures, which are like really mild temple headaches that come with lots of forcing or the presence of your tulpa. (feels like the "expanding brain" meme irl if im being honest LOL) If you're struggling to tell if you're making any progress, try paying attention for that too.

That's about all I can think of for now! Good luck to ya anon ✨ check out my #tulpamancy advice tag for more!

[antiquatedsimmer]

As the women engaged in pleasant conversation in the parlor, Eddy and Daniel made their way out of the kitchen through the side door, embarking on a leisurely stroll across the sprawling expanse of the property.

Eddy's eyes widened with intrigue as he absorbed the news. "Well, I'll be damned! A full-fledged Railsystem right here in Henford? "

Daniel, standing tall with a rugged demeanor, nodded with a sense of authority. "Yep," he replied, his voice resonating with confidence. "It's going to be a grand undertaking, my friend. We're still in the early stages, mind you. We're busy mapping out potential routes and acquiring the necessary parts to ensure the steam train functions flawlessly."

"It's going to be a grand undertaking, my friend. We're still in the early stages, mind you. We're busy mapping out potential routes and acquiring the necessary parts to ensure the steam train functions flawlessly."

Eddy turned his head towards Daniel, "Do you happen to know why they decided to begin construction through Henford? It seems rather distant, and the community is very close-knit. "

"We're nearing the end of our Western Expanse, Edward," Daniel said with a tinge of melancholy in his voice. "The days of the wild west are fading away, giving rise to a more civilized era. "

Daniel's countenance shifted to one of resolve as he spoke, "Out here in Henford, my friend, we witness the seeds of a promising future. The vast expanse of land holds great potential for a blossoming community. There's ample room for the construction of factories, bustling businesses, and stately homes. The men I've had the privilege of working with, esteemed businessmen who helm locomotive companies, are fervently seeking to establish extensive trade routes connecting cities near and far."

Eddy squinted his eyes, using his hand as a makeshift visor to shield them from the piercing sun. "You know my sentiments 'bout them overconfident industrialists. Them fancy men with their top hats and deep pockets, struttin' 'round like they own the world, noses high up in the air."

"Seems to me, this is nothin' but a bunch of wealthy folks gone mad, chasin' after more gold. They wanna tear up this land in Henford, disruptin' the natural order of things. Ain't sound thinkin', if you ask me."

"Ya know, Daniel, I've witnessed it all before," Eddy remarked, "These grand plans of progress, tearin' up the land, buildin' tracks, and hopin' that shiny locomotive keeps chuggin' along. But what happens when that contraption breaks down? You're stranded, dependin' on a hunk of metal rather than a trusty horse."

He paused for a moment, his gaze fixed on the horizon. "A good horse, now that's somethin' reliable.

"These young folks today, they're all caught up in this newfangled technology. " he scoffed

Daniel turned to Eddy his voice carrying a hint of amusement. "Well, Edward, I must say I didn't expect you to be such a skeptic. But hear me out." He motioned towards the vast horizon, his hand gracefully sweeping across the landscape. "This train system, it's not just about the fancy inventions and speed. It's about progress, about opening up new avenues for hardworking folks like yourself."

Eddy let out a hearty laugh, his voice tinged with a hint of skepticism. "Well, I reckon I'll believe it when my eyes behold it, Daniel."

[antirepurp]

Your post about Ultimate level Digimon is based. I'm now having a new level of brainrot about it xD

Are there any pieces of Digimon Media that you think strike a good balance with digivolving to that level aside from Digimon World 1?

the first that come to mind are adventure and 02 and kinda tamers as well. while i do think the thing where megas trivialize everything prior is still present in adventure where taichi and yamato feel like the true protags who leave everyone else in the dust in the end, and adventure 02 goes even further by giving imperialdramon a mode change on top of a mega, there's still a special feeling to the ultimates. adventure 1 makes them hard to unlock by locking them behind crests, and adventure 02 requires jogress for them. arguably wargreymon and metalgarurumon also feel more special bc they're warp evolutions which gets lost in later media when megas just start evolving from ultimates

as for tamers, it's actually where i got the idea of limiting evolution from originally. it doesn't come up as much later on but evolution is much more sparse in the beginning of tamers than it is in many of the other anime, and typically it has to be worked for to accomplish, with megas requiring the tamer to fuse with their digimon to get there, which in turn makes the prior forms of digivolution more preferable in comparison. that said the way the megas are unlocked kind of has them water down ultimates, i'd argue that keeping them off-limits until the very end would've worked better for making the ultimates feel cooler, but then that would've meddled with some plot progression and that's an entirely different can of worms. idk from what i remember of tamers it treats evolution mechanics in a neat way that made evolutions feel more special when they happened

for non-anime picks i'd actually say digimon world 2 like the maniac i am because the sheer amount of grinding necessary to reach the point where you can evolve your funny guys into ultimates is intense. the game at one point even offers you a very early metalgreymon you can recruit if you know what you're doing that can obliterate some bosses and tricky encounters and it feels cool as hell. megas exist in the game yeah but with the level caps you can only raise by fusing digimon and raising them up again you feel immensely rewarded at the point where you can evolve someone into ultimate

going off a bit more on this too but here's a snippet of a helpful evolution chart for world 2

simply put the numbers indicate a stat for how many times your digimon has to have been fused before to allow it to evolve into that specific digimon, and for reference you unlock a new evolution stage every 10 regular levels (lv10 > champion, lv20 > ultimate, lv30 > mega). a few lines can't evolve into megas at all, most that can only have the option for a single mega, and if you have two options the other requires you to have fused a Ton of times prior, omnimon being one of the more ridiculous ones at 20+. and obviously since you'll be leveling up slower the higher you get, you'll end up spending a lot of time as champion and ultimate before getting even close to getting your first mega. that said with how grindy world 2 gets this stuff probably won't be appreciated by a ton of people, and if anything the digimon story games handled it in a way that was more player-friendly with cyber sleuth and hackers memory making it a ton of fun to fuck around with. i think the rewarding magic of further evo lines gets a bit lost with those however, especially when they implement evolution stages beyond megas in the case of a specific few digimon (iirc burst modes are new evo stages, and there's some "ultra" level digimon in that game too, so ya know)

uhhh tl;dr megas had a tendency to feel more special in older media i suppose

[krispyweiss]

Rewind: Warren Zevon - Preludes: Rare and Unreleased Recordings (2007)

Editor’s note: With Warren Zevon’s long-overdue nomination to the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame finally arriving, Sound Bites rewinds the tape back to Zevon’s posthumous Preludes.

Warren Zevon knew who he was before the rest of us had ever heard of the man with the world’s-greatest given/stage name.

Cigarettes make the sun come up/whiskey makes the sun go down, he sings on “Empty Hearted Town,” one of a number of songs that inexplicably had to wait for Zevon’s death before being released.

It finally arrived on 2007’s Preludes: Rare and Unreleased Recordings, a two-disc set compiled from tapes found in a storage garage after Zevon died in 2003.

Disc one is dedicated to pre-Excitable Boy demos including such works-in-progress as “Accidentally Like a Martyr,” which illustrates Zevon’s relentless honing of a potential masterpiece to its potential, and a raucous, ska-flecked take of “Werewolves of London” that proves electric piano was not the right instrument for this melody.

With “London”’s exception, these early numbers are centered in and around Los Angeles. And Zevon, with a million-dollar bill he can’t break in his pocket and unpaid bar tabs all over town, was an observant denizen of - and eager participant in - its seedier side.

Some of these songs - “Hasten Down the Wind,” “Carmelita,” “Poor, Poor Pitiful Me” - would be made famous by Linda Ronstadt, though Zevon released them, too. And the aforementioned orphans, including “Stop Rainin’ Lord,” “Studebaker” and “The Rosarita Beach Café,” seem ready-made for the early Zevon LPs on which they never appeared.

The back half of Preludes is dedicated mostly to conversations recorded around the time of 2000’s Life’ll Kill Ya, where the then-53-year-old Zevon looked back. And forward.

“I don’t think I’m middle-aged,” Zevon says. “I don’t know anybody that’s 106.

“… I think you have to spend a fair amount of time realizing that you will be (dead), so you remember to enjoy everything that you possibly can. … You always want to try and tell younger people that, which is very difficult.”

A solo-acoustic live version of “Don’t Let Us Get Sick” from 1999 closes the LP with a kick in the gut - just as Zevon would have wanted.

While Preludes is not the best place for a newcomer to start - Excitable Boy and Transverse City are Sound Bites’ recommendations - the album is essential, if melancholy, listening for existing fans.

And now - with the 20th anniversary of Zevon’s death and, perhaps, a Rock Hall induction looming - is a good time to cue it up again.

2/2/23

[lev1hei1chou]

OBEY ME! BROTHERS AND PDA

Note: Literally just small hcs?

A/n: I'm figuring out how to use Tumblr in phone and this is my first time writing headcanons so pls forgive me if it's bad ;-;

LUCIFER:

•In the early stages of your relationship, Lucifer wouldn't be very open to skinship; let alone PDA

•As your relationship progresses, he'd be open behind closed doors.

•Not very big on PDA, it's either never or rare

•If there's a crowd, he'd hold you by your waist and keep you close

•If you've been dating for a while, you can expect a kiss on the forehead if he feels like it

•As the right hand man of the demon king, he has an image to maintain in public so everything is limited

MAMMON:

•What is he? A tsundere. Does he need your attention? Yes. Will he ask for it? We know how he is-

•And yes he needs your attention

•Hed act like youre the one who really needs his attention when it's the other way

•"Ya want a kiss? See it's not like i need it very badly or anything but ya just look like ya want one"

•Cmon mammon would it hurt to admit.

•He loves PDA but it's almost impossible for him to say that out loud

•Holds your hand bc it makes him feel safe but he'd put an act first "OFCOURSE ya need the great mammon to hold yer hand"

•Hugs. Hugs. Hugs. But he doesn't want it, it's just that his lover looked like you really really really wanted one

LEVIATHAN:

•PDA? He doesn't even step out of the house of lamentation.

•He's obviously insecure and shocked that you chose him in the first place so it's gonna take a long long time for PDA

•I mean If you EVER step out of the HOL together that is

•Hand holding with a lot of blushing because hes still in denial (even if you're in a relationship a long time)

SATAN:

•He's not like the older brothers. So, No overaffection, no shyness or no intention to hold a specific image

•He is pretty open to PDA, but he prefers to not go overboard with it and has his limits

•He takes you almost everywhere; Cat cafe's, Libraries, bookstores

•Expect kisses in the forehead, occasionally on the cheek

•Has a hand over your shoulder all the time

ASMODEUS:

•We all know what's coming

•HE LOVES to show his s/o aka you off

•Hed swear that he thrives by your attention and doesn't mind showering you with his attention

•And ofcourse, he loves you a lot so he's very very very open to PDA

•You can, ofcourse, expect any sort of skinship when out with asmodeus

•Always takes pictures of you and him outside;)

BEELZEBUB:

•He's not very bothered by this whole PDA ordeal

•Beel loves your attention though

•Hes probably more into getting the snack you went out to try

•BEAR HUGS. YOU HEAR ME? BEAR HUGS

•I don't think he'd even notice the stares you'd get

•Pretty sure he'd randomly pick you up in public because yes

•Piggy backs

BELPHEGOR:

•Second one to rarely leave the house. Sleep is number one obviously

•But he's not against PDA

•He won't complain if his dearest is there to shower him with affection, regardless of where they are

•He knows you're having a hard time pulling him around but c'mon

•Hed probably end up sleeping on you while standing so you're now dragging a half asleep demon around the streets

•Might kiss you though when you least expect it

I love mammon okay

Here it is, i hope you like it <3

[ink-and-dagger]

Dearest Darlings🖤

Hi. It’s me. Just popping by quickly to say that I’m overwhelmed (and a lil terrified) with all the love (and hate) I’ve received for Chapter 14 of DWM. Genuinely wasn’t expecting this volume of messages/asks/comments etc. I’m finding real life a little difficult and overwhelming at the moment, and this fandom is the only thing keeping me somewhat sane and happy right now. So thank you all so much for each and every interaction. Even the angy ones. They all help.❤️

I’m going to do my best to make sure I respond to everyone, but it may take a bit of time, and if I miss you for whatever reason then please know that I have read every single comment and they’ve all made me smile/laugh (even if it’s just a keyboard smash/incoherent screaming).

I’ll be answering my asks in groups of three to not overwhelm anyone who has notifications on for me. Especially since it’s just gonna be a load of different iterations of me laughing evilly.

Also just a gentle reminder that I won’t respond to enquiries regarding when the next chapter is coming out. It’s in progress, but very early stages still.

Genuinely love you all, ya lil internet sluts 🖤

[archangelbelletti]

Guide to Queries

A guide for all writers who want to pitch a book to an agent, but haven't done it before.

All of this comes from my experience and shouldn't be taken a firm rule.

Terminology

Some important query lingo you should know when enterying this stage!

MS = Manuscript

Partial Request = when an agent requests more material about your book, but not the full manuscript. It might be some more chapters.

Full Request = when an agent requests the whole manuscript.

YA/NA/MG/A = Young Adult, New Adult, Middle Grade, Adult. All age target acronyms.

Query Letter = the letter in which you pitch your book to an agent

Synopsis = a summary of all important events happening in the book in a max of 1-2 pages (depending on what the agent requires)

Where to find agents

Finding agents is pretty simple!

You can either use Google (type "[genre] [age target] [country] agents", i.e. "fantasy ya american agents" and you should find some already!

Other tools:

QueryTracker (I have the Pro version where I can see how long agents take to reply and what kind of replies they give) --> here you can find agents, use the filter to find those who take your genre and age target

Manuscript Wish List --> a website where you can see what kind of books agents want to read, from the very specific to the broader

Twitter --> use hashtags like #mswl #amagenting to find more wish lists and agents talking about their job and queries.

Who to query

I'd advise only querying those agents that

fit your filters perfectly.

Choose carefully, and make sure to follow them on Twitter for updates! Sometimes they post about their progress in reading queries, so you might know something about your pitch early.

When to query

- When your book sounds like a published book to you, your beta readers, and/or your Critique Partner.

- When you can't find errors you'd find in a printed book on a shelf.

- When it's as done and perfect as you can get it!

Where to query

"I'm not American, but I want to query an American agent! Can I do it?

Yes! Don't worry about your nationality too much. Just make sure you write the query following the standard American rules for courtesy in emails ("sincerely," before your signature, "Dear ms/mr/mx" at the beginning, etc.)

[slasherhaven]

How would Thomas Hewitt, Bo Sinclair, and a male yautja would react if their very very (like ready to pop any day) pregnant S/O was hurt by an escapee victim? Level of how hurt the S/O gets is up to you!

Thomas,  Bo, and a Yautja When Their Heavily Pregnant S/O get’s hurt (no serious injuries):

Thomas Hewitt

Thomas has never felt joy like the joy he felt when you told him you were pregnant.

He always wanted a family and he loved you more than anything. This was all he could ever want.

Both he and Luda May are pretty protective over you. Neither of them letting you lift a finger, no matter how much you insisted you were fine.

Thomas can’t do enough for you during this time.

And now that you could give birth any day now, both of them are always hovering around you.

Thomas was a very anxious when the family brought back the next group of victims.

You could go into labour any second and now he has to deal with these victims.

The timing couldn’t have been worse.

But he was doing his job. 

The only issue was that one of the victims, that Hoyt was supposed to be taking care of, had escaped.

Thomas was down on the basement when he heard you shout for him.

Expecting the worst, he quickly stopped what he was doing and headed up stairs to find you.

He had never felt so much anger and fear at the same time when he saw you and the escaped victim in the kitchen.

The man had a knife in his hand and when he heard Thomas enter the room, he had pulled you in front of him and held that knife against your neck, making your eyes widen.

Thomas’ whole body tensed at the sight, his fists clenching by his sides.

In that moment he feared losing both you and his unborn child. He wouldn’t know what to do with himself, he could never forgive himself is something happened to either of you.

What was he supposed to do? He couldn’t move, that would be risking your life.

Thomas was beyond relieved to see Luda May creep into the room, Hoyt’s shotgun in hand.

The victim froze when he felt the gun press against his back.

Following Luda May’s orders, the man dropped the knife and stepped away from you.

Thomas held his hand out and you hurried (as much as you could) to his side and away from the escaped victim.

Thomas pulled you behind him, glaring down the smaller man.

Thomas looked over you before moving to grab the victim, leaving you with Luda May while he dragged the man down to the basement to deal with him.

Luda May would sit you down, getting you something to drink, fussing over you no matter how much you assured her you were fine.

Thomas wouldn’t give the victim another chance to escape and he was going to kill Hoyt for letting him escape in the first place.

It wasn’t long before Thomas was coming back up from the basement and into the kitchen, all the victims having been dealt with by now.

Luda May got out of the way and left the room to give you both some space as Thomas hurried over to you.

He knelt down in front of you, eyes wide with worry as he frantically looked over you for any sign of injury.

“Thomas, I’m fine, I promise. He didn’t hurt me” you tried to assure him but you knew that he would calm down until he had convinced himself you were okay.

His large hands settled on your round stomach, resting his forehead against it gently.

He really thought he was going to lose you both for a moment. He could never let something like this happen again!

“Thomas...the baby is fine, I feel fine” you promised him quietly as you ran your fingers through his hair.

You have to take his face in your hands and make him look up at you, again promising that everything is okay.

Thomas would be keeping an extra close eye on you, not letting you out of his sight.

And you’re staying in bed! This has been a very stressful day, it’s not good for the baby.

He’s just so concerned about you so you don’t fight him, letting him take you upstairs for you to rest.

He’d calm down eventually and you knew that. He just needed to see that you really were fine and maybe have Luda May reassure him a little as well.

You were sure that he was furious with Hoyt for letting the victim escape in the first place.

Thomas also wouldn’t leave your side for the rest of the day.

He nearly lost you. You nearly got hurt. And he couldn’t protect you...he wouldn’t let that happen again. He just couldn’t.

Bo Sinclair

Bo had never thought about having kids in the past, he already decided that he wouldn’t be a very good father and that he wasn’t interested in having kids.

And when you told him that you were pregnant, he wasn’t sure how to feel.

But as time went on, Bo started to realise that he wanted this and he was looking forward to finally meeting his child.

As the pregnancy progressed, the more protective he became.

Whenever a new group of victims came into town, you were not allowed anywhere near them. He wasn’t taking that risk.

In fact, a group rolled into town during the early stages of your pregnancy and Bo had actually sent you to stay at Lester’s until it was dealt with. Just to keep you as far away from the danger as possible.

But now that you were expected to give birth any day now, Bo didn’t want you too far away. He wanted you to be at home, where he could check on you and be there for you.

Apparently his precautions hadn’t been enough.

One of the victims had escaped him and got into the house.

Of course Bo hurried after the victim, chasing him up to the house, not wanting him to run into you.

Bo was already cursing himself and blaming himself for anything that might happen to you. He had kept you here, he had let the man escape. You were in danger because of him and he couldn’t forgive himself for that.

He was trying to be better for you and his child, but this was just proof that it wasn’t so easy. He had let you both down.

Rushing through the open front door, Bo finally found the escaped victim in the living room. However, you were there with him. Eyes wide and panicked as the victim grabbed your arm and held a knife against you.

“Let her go” Bo demanded, shotgun in hand. Though, it was pointless if you didn’t get out of the way.

It was just a standoff for a while. Bo unable to shoot him and couldn’t move closer in fear of him hurting you. He tried to convince the victim to release you but they only agreed to do so if he let them leave. But of course they didn’t trust him to uphold his end of the deal, and Bo wasn’t about to let them take you anywhere. 

Thankfully, all the noise you were making got the attention of Vincent when he returned to the house. 

Bo didn’t react when he saw his twin enter the room behind you and the victim, just waiting for Vincent to deal with them. 

And of course Vincent did hit the victim over their head, their unconscious body falling to the floor. You were family, both Vincent and Lester were protective over you as well.

Bo instantly put down the gun down and made a move towards you. You quickly stepped away from the victim’s body and towards Bo, letting him pull you towards him.

“You got this?” Bo asked, looking at Vincent, who nodded. “C’mon” Bo wrapped an arm around you and guided you out of the room.

Bo took you upstairs and into the bedroom, sitting you down on the bed. You needed to rest.

“Are you alright?” he asked, scanning over you for any sign of injury. 

“Y-yeah, he didn’t hurt me” you assured him. “...do you have to go and deal with them?” you asked a little quietly. 

You were telling the truth, you weren’t hurt, but you didn’t want him to leave you right now. 

“No. Vincent’s got it handled” Bo shook his head, “I’m not going to let anything like this happen to you again, alright?”

“I know” you smiled slightly, bringing your hand up to his cheek. 

You knew he was blaming himself and while it...kinda was his fault, you weren’t hurt.

Bo was going to make sure that you were safe from now on. He’d figure out a way to keep you and his child safe, while continuing to run the town. This wasn’t going to happen again, he would make sure of it.

Yautja (Predator)

As soon as you found out that you were pregnant, he became more protective than ever and he was already very protective over you.

If he had it his way, you would be pretty much bed bound.

He just wants you to be safe and healthy, he doesn’t want you to take any risks.

It wasn’t a victim that hurt you, since your mate would never be foolish enough to take you on a hunt with him when you were pregnant.

It was actually a young male Yautja. 

It had been an accident but that didn’t change anything.

The young male was unblooded but overconfident, the type that thought a lot of himself but didn’t earn that right.

He hadn’t been watching where he was going and pushed you right over.

You and your mate had actually been on your way to the medbay to have a check up, since you were so close to giving birth, when it happened. 

That meant that your mate was right by your side. 

The young Yautja walked right into you, knocking you backwards.

Your mate reacted as fast as he could but he hadn’t been on guard, thinking the walk from your room to the doctor would be safe. He softened your landing but couldn’t stop you from falling completely.

Your mate was torn between the need to check on you and the instinct to kill the one who had hurt you.

He couldn’t let the younger male get away with it and, before he even knew it, he was attacking him.

It was you calling for him to stop and telling him to take you to the doctor that snapped him out of his rage.

You were more important.

He knew that.

He pushed the younger male away before turning back to you.

He helped you back to your feet and got you to the medbay.

Insisted on them running every possible check on you since you had been knocked over.

Logically he knew you would be fine. The fall could have been worse and even if it was, their medical advancements would have been able to deal with it.

But that didn’t stop him from worrying and fretting over you. You were still so squishy to him, being a human and all. And he worried about just how fragile you were.

The other Yautja in the medbay were worried as well, knowing that any fall during this stage of your pregnancy could be bad.

So, you definitely have nothing to worry about. You’re getting the best medical care possible and everyone there is worried about your wellbeing...even if it’s because you’re a human and they think the slightest thing could kill you.

After this, your mate isn’t even going to let you out of your room without him.

You’re clearly not safe anywhere. You and his child are his number one priority.

It can be a little suffocating but it’s nearly over. He’ll relax a tiny bit once the baby is born.

[the-insomniac-emporium]

Serenade (Daniela Dimitrescu/Reader) Pt. 1

Fandom: Resident Evil: Village Pairing: Daniela Dimitrescu/Reader Rating: T for teen for mild language. Later entries in the series will be more mature though, just a heads up Warnings: None this chapter. There will probably be canon typical violence/blood mentioned or referenced in future chapters though, cuz, ya know, vampire ladies? Notes: No beta reader, we die like Ethan Winters’ hands (repeatedly, and with odd frequency)

Chapter 1: Nocturne

     Of all the tasks assigned to you, none were as bittersweet as that of dusting Lady Dimitrescu’s piano. Years ago, before you had been shuffled off to a remote European village, before you had been roughly snatched from your home, before… this, you had been taught to play music. From a young age it brought you comfort, entertained you on quiet days, and even made you your fair share of friends. Though you had experimented with a handful of instruments, none felt more natural than piano. Leaving your family’s heirloom piano behind was one of the hardest things you had ever had to do. 

     Until you arrived at Castle Dimitrescu, at least. Sweat often dropped off your brow as you spent endless hours scrubbing floors, carrying baskets of clothes or mysterious parcels of meat up and down flights of stairs, rushing to and fro rooms across the estate. Physical labor was no stranger to you, but no employer had ever been as demanding as those you now served. Hence part of why you always breathed a sigh of relief when you were chosen to dust the piano. It was hardly a demanding task, even when you had to take care not to accidentally let the keys make any noise. No one was allowed to play it without permission (and that was never given).

     Which brought you an aching sensation at the core of your chest, balled up alongside past regrets, a hundred million thoughts of alternative realities where you didn’t hurt so much. There was no point in imagining what choices might have saved you from your fate… and yet you did so anyway. Sometimes you thought about barricading yourself in the room, just so you could play a couple songs, even if it would guarantee you a painful death. But you could never bring yourself to willingly disobey Lady Dimitrescu; not when you had heard the wails and screams of Maidens a few floors below.

     Yes, you would never willingly, knowingly do such. That wasn’t to say you were incapable of mistakes. No, you weren’t that fortunate. It was such a simple error, really, just a misjudgment of the cloth held between your fingers. Your hand slipped. That was all. But that slip led to an accidental press of a key- f#, if you heard right- that sounded throughout the room with damning clarity. Just like that, you felt the pitiful thing you called life shatter to pieces on the floor. Inside your chest your heart started to pound, a metronome speeding this performance along to its end.

     Had you not been paralyzed with dread, you might have accepted your fate with enough grace to sit down, play those last few tunes like you had daydreamed about so many times. But you didn’t, couldn’t. All you felt you could do was strain your ears and listen for the impending sounds of angry footsteps.

     Instead your concentration was interrupted by a door flying open, hitting the wall with a slam you knew would leave a dent, as a swarm of insects burst in. Nearly jumping out of your skin you put a hand to your chest, half expecting not to feel a heartbeat anymore. The rhythm was off, for sure, and it skipped a beat when the swarm surged together to form a somewhat familiar figure: Daniela Dimitrescu. Leaning against the piano, one hand bracing against it, the woman pretended to examine her sickle, idly twisting it back and forth in her hand. When she spoke, she didn’t even bother to glance in your direction.

     “I never understood why mother dedicated a whole room to this,” she muses, casually inclining her head towards the piano. “It’s not like any of our instructors lasted very long. Why not let this gather dust with the rest of the useless junk somewhere upstairs?” There’s a pause, and for a moment you mentally debate whether or not you’re supposed to respond. Apparently not, as Daniela soon turns to you and speaks more directly, which is grand, really, as your tongue felt as if it was glued to the roof of your mouth. “Maybe she knew someday someone would come along to serenade us. And you clearly know how to play, otherwise you wouldn’t have dared to make a sound.”

     Stepping forward, she extends a gloved hand, cupping your chin so gently that you almost couldn’t feel her touch. Her gaze, however, was dangerously intense, unblinking, and filled with far less joy than her grin would suggest. The touch lasts only a few seconds. Just long enough to leave you shaking with anticipation. Daniela’s toothy smile only widens as she backs up, keeping her eyes on you even as she reclines into a chair in the corner of the room. You almost wished she would just get it over with and kill you. Whatever she had in mind would be worse in the end, yes? 

     “Well? Aren’t you going to play for me? Show me how much you love me? I don’t have all night,” Daniela says expectantly. She’s relaxed fully, sitting with one leg crossed over the other, spine pressed up against the back of the chair, but she hasn’t set her sickle down. There’s a clear threat in the way she holds it, grip tight enough to let you know that she’s still ready (and itching) to use it.

     You couldn’t help but wonder if she’d be acting differently if she knew that you did, in fact, know how to play. Was this just a teasing start to your punishment? Or was there a part of her genuinely interested in hearing music? Obviously you hoped for the latter. Hell, you practically prayed for it as you slowly pulled out the piano bench, awkwardly sat down, and urged your body to remember a song. What genre would a vampire from the 1950’s even enjoy? All you knew were bits and pieces of a few classics, a couple chord progressions from early 2000’s hits, and a handful of songs you had written yourself.

     There wasn’t much time to ponder, not with Daniela’s gaze burning a whole in the side of your head. So you simply pressed your fingers to the keys, took a deep breath, and let muscle memory take over. Your eyes became half lidded as you started to play, hardly paying attention to what you were doing. It felt like a single glance at your captor would result in the worst case of stage fright known to mankind. Instead you focused on the piano’s wooden frame, and the many grain marks twisting within.

     All the while your fingers glided over the keys, delicately pressing here and there, starting with something simple. Little more than a chord on your left hand, followed with a few short notes on your right, repeating in different places up and down the scale. It was almost a test, a gentle showing to see what Daniela would do. You still refused to look at her, even when you heard what sounded like a bored sigh. A knot tied itself in your stomach, and you gulped, before you shifted mental gears. Evidently “soft and simple” wasn’t going to cut it. Hopefully you could please one Lady without earning the ire of any of the others.

     So you paused, letting the notes suspend in the air for a moment, and came back swinging. The kiddy gloves were off, abandoned on the floor with your sense of caution. Grander things came back to mind as your fingers danced atop the keys, stretching chords and melodies alongside each other, the best of what you recalled pouring out of you without a sign of stopping. Out of the corner of your eyes you saw Daniela sit up, paying more attention then she had at the start. Confidence found itself growing at the center of your chest, and it managed to turn your lips up into a smile. How long had it been since you had been able to perform like this? Years? A decade, even? You didn’t know. It didn’t matter.

     Minutes passed by like this, with your hands moving constantly, even as your gaze never shifted. It was heaven channeled on Earth. Whatever was to come after, death or dismemberment, you couldn’t care less. Let them take your blood, your life. They could never take this music from your mind, from your memories, or the joy it inspired in you. If you were to die soon, at least you had been given one last soliloquy.

     Eventually the song had to end. It was a bitter moment, one you dreaded for its followup, but otherwise would have found pride in. After all, you were evidently the first maiden to give a performance (at least of this variety) to one of the Dimitrescu sisters! Certainly that was an accomplishment? Maybe your brain would let you celebrate later… assuming you survived. Daniela had stayed quiet since her earlier sigh, letting you play on without interruption thus far. Now that the song was over you didn’t know what to expect. Knowing Daniela, or at least knowing the rumors surrounding you, it was hard to imagine that anything you could expect would be accurate.

     “How long have you been hiding this little talent of yours?” She coos, clapping her hands together with a short giggle. So far so good, you thought, clinging desperately to hope. Once more she rose to her feet, moving so smoothly she might as well have been gliding, and ended up by your side. This time her hand rested on your shoulder, putting enough pressure to keep you from moving. “Don’t tell me you’re shy, that would simply be too… precious.” With that said her hand trails along your shoulder, across your collarbone, up your neck, then rests for a moment on your cheek. The touch sends a shiver down your spine, which only encourages Daniela, and she tucks a strand of your hair behind her ear.

     Before she can say more, or you could even attempt to form words, there’s the faint sound of someone yelling in the distance. A name, you think, although it’s not loud enough for you to make out who’s being called. The answer becomes evident soon enough, however, as Daniela pulls back from you suddenly, smile trading out for a scowl. Some part of you instantly misses her touch, leaving the rest of you confused more than anything.

     “Get back to your work, then,” Daniela says, roughly, the playfulness in her voice now entirely absent. It was such a sudden change in demeanor that you didn’t know how to react. Thankfully her eyes were no longer on you, and she was already moving towards the door. Had you really managed to play your way out of a punishment? You knew for a fact that at least one other maiden had lost her life for making the same mistake you did, yet now Daniela looks ready to leave without so much as a slap on the wrist. But she does pause in the doorway, as if reading your thoughts, and throws you a look over her shoulder. Her eyes narrow for a split second before she gives you one last wicked grin. “Don’t worry, sweet thing, I won’t forget you anytime soon.”

     Just like that she was gone, into a cloud of insects, out the door and into the corridor beyond. The tension in the room had left, you could finally breathe easy… and yet still your mind was racing. Those words she had left you with- were they a threat? Or a promise of something softer? Only time would tell.

[wordsnstuff]

Guide to Story Researching

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Start With Broad Subjects

When you begin a story that is heavy with technical detail that must be checked for accuracy, the most efficient way of going about it is approaching the first draft with a general sense of the topic. Then, as you write more and more, keep note of details you don’t have or facts you need to find. When you reach the second and third drafts, turn that general idea into specific detail. You’ll know what you need to know at that point, and you won’t waste valuable time doing unnecessary research instead of revising.

Keep Track of Your Resources

Hoard. Your. Sources. Not only so you can cite them to any editors or beta-readers whose knowledge may conflict with what you’ve researched, but so you can refer back to them if you decide to elaborate on the part of the story that required that information in the first place. Always keep a list of links in a document with the specific information you’ve gleaned from it, listed in a way where you can easily navigate and revisit sources and information.

Hold Credible Sources Close

If you find something credible and easily navigable, covet it. When you’re researching very niche or specific topics and you find a gem of a resource that is verifiably correct and easy to understand and use for your purposes, it’s very important that you get everything you can out of it. A lot of resources on things you’ll have to do extensive research on are behind a paywall or incredibly dense. 

Know When to Google vs. Ask Someone

My general rule is this: if it’s an indisputable fact that is fairly straightforward, google it. If it’s a matter of objective fact, google it. If it is an experience or a matter of opinion/perspective, ask someone or find a primary source. If it’s a matter of emotion or subjectivity, ask someone about their experience or their perspective on the issue.

Examples of what to Google:

What year did the Hindenburg Blimp crash?

How many people died of the plague? 

What was Led Zeppelin’s most lucrative studio album?

Examples of what to ask a qualified individual about:

What does gender dysphoria feel like? *

What was the public sentiment around the Havana Mob in the 1950s?

How does sexual abuse impact male victims? *

* - When researching these things, it’s recommended to obtain multiple accounts and perspectives and maintain sensitivity

First Draft = Main Idea, Second Draft = Specificities

As I said before, the easiest way to ensure accuracy takes a front seat in your final product is to accomplish it in stages. The first draft should include basic ideas that provide a general sense of the topic. The second draft is where you should begin deeper research into more specific topics based on what you actually included in the story.

Common Struggles

~ How do I research linguistics of differing time periods?... Researching specifics like this require specialized resources. I would go about it by finding general resources and then delving deeper into the sources they cite within the text. For instance, wikipedia is a general resource, but the citations at the bottom usually lead to a variety of niche resources on the topic, and you’ll probably find what you’re looking for in them instead. 

~ Where do I find credible medical information?... Put simply, doctors. Seriously. There’s a giant community of medical blogs and journals where doctors break medical information down for the general public’s understanding, and they usually cite recent and up-to-date medical studies and practices. Don’t start with WebMD, start with things like MayoClinic.org and through there, find their medical publications like PubMed, which has millions of citations for biomedical literature.

~ Where do I begin deciding what I need to research?... You’ll learn what you don’t know when you actually write your draft and find the holes in your information. I recommend keeping notes of where you’re like “um, I don’t know what year that was” or “I have no clue how to describe what this feels like”. 

~ When should I stop researching?... Stop researching when the detail starts to eclipse the practical application to your story. Remember that the purpose of your research is not to give your reader a lecture, but to accurately portray whatever it may be in order to allow the reader to suspend their disbelief and become immersed in the plot. 

~ How do I determine which information will integrate naturally?... Once you comb through your draft, you’ll find suitable places to slip facts and accuracies into the narrative. If you spend paragraphs writing a report on so-and-so, it’s not mixing in well enough and you’re probably including a lot of unnecessary detail. Research is meant to be sprinkled in gradually and mixed into the plot as you go along. It’s not to write a dense forward to stave off the “fact-checking trolls”.

Other Resources

Useful Writing Resources | Part II

Resources For Writing Sketchy Topics

Where To Start Researching For Stories

Resources For Writing Royalty

Resources For Writing The Mafia

Editing & Proofreading Cheat Sheet

What To Change Draft-By-Draft

Finding And Fixing Plot Holes

Resources For Romance Writers

Resources For Writing YA Fiction/Romance

Resources For Writing (Global) Period Pieces : High Middle Ages & Renaissance

Resources For Writing (Global) Period Pieces : 1600s

Resources For Writing (Global) Period Pieces : 1700s

Resources For Writing (Global) Period Pieces : 1800s

Resources For Writing (Global) Period Pieces : 1900-1939

Resources For Writing (Global) Period Pieces : 1940-1969

Resources For Writing (Global) Period Pieces : 1970-1999

World Building In Historical Fiction

 Writing Other Eras

Historically Accurate Dialogue

Accuracy vs Relatability

Guide To Writing Historical Fiction | Part II

Resources For Writing Science Fiction

Resources For Writing Dystopian/Post-Apocalyptic Stories

Resources For Fantasy/Mythology Writers

Resources For Crime/Mystery/Thriller Writers

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[haztory]

OK BUT THAT'S ME BEING AN IDIOT HAHAHHAHAHAHAHA drabble/sfw JAHAHHAHAHAHAH DAMN

““You better catch that fucking bouquet, babe. Our relationship is on the line!” + “You wanna go toe to toe with me, pretty boy?” with Bokuto for the loveliest Clara! from my writing event that is now closed!

warnings: adult langauge and that’s it!

a/n: i answered her previous ask for the quotes so i’m just posting the drabble here! thank you for your patience my love!!! i hope you like it <33333

bokuto koutarou x f!reader; (fluff, all the fluff and wedding shenanigans)

Bokuto loves weddings. They’re truly his weak spot. Ask him to attend and he’s there an hour early, regardless of whether you’re his best friend or his cousin twice removed. The man lives for a wedding.

He loves the sentimentality of the ceremony that never fails to make him teary-eyed and oppositely, he loves the liveliness of the reception, half tempted every time to push the DJ aside and take over the mixing of music with a drink in his hand and a sloppy yell. He’s a vivacious mess of mixed moods and energy, but truthfully, he’s the best date anyone could ever ask for.

The best attendee too, considering almost everyone wants him to be a groomsman. He usually can never say no, but this time, it wasn’t even a question; Especially not for Hinata.

But above all, he loves that every wedding he attends grants him ample opportunity to enter into the sanctity of his fantasies and imagine his own.

“Did ya see him up there?!” Atsumu barks with a hard laugh, one hand clutching his whiskey and another his suit-clad chest, “He was cryin’ more than the groom!”

Met with the boastful laughs of his fellow team members, all gathered in a scattered circle by the bar, Bokuto jokingly pushes the blond on his left with a loud scoff and a faux-defense tone.

“I held it in!”

 “I heard you sniffling when Sho finally entered the venue,” Sakusa says, pointing a finger at Bokuto with the same hand that held his own alcoholic drink, “Don’t lie.”

 The group erupts into even more scattered laughter, that of which Bokuto finally joins in. His suit jacket has long since been abandoned, and his sleeves are rolled up to his elbows as he holds his hands up in surrender, “What can I say? I love weddings!”

Throwing an arm around his shoulders, Meian joyfully says from beside him, “At least we’ll know now how you’ll be at your own.” His eyes waggle in accompaniment and Bokuto feels his cheeks start to ache from the intensity of his smile. 

“We’ll bring extra tissues!”

Flustered to the core, Bokuto dips his head in abnormal shyness— the likes of which have the entirety of his friend group leaning forward in curiosity, their own interested smiles painted on their faces.

Fascinating as it may be to see the loud and boisterous wing spiker reduced to flushed cheeks at the mention of marriage, it doesn’t take much to figure out why; Even if they didn’t know him as well as they did, it was more than clear as to the reason when Bokuto’s own gaze tries to covertly dart to the side. That of which they all notice and blatantly follow. 

Stood beside the table of the bride, there you stood in all of your sheer elegance laughing with a number of the bridesmaids, blissfully unaware of a loving gaze that was drawn much too heavily to your turned figure. Focused on the way your dress shimmers in the dim lighting and the way you speak amongst the other guests, Bokuto feels locked in the trace of your magnanimous presence. Shyness dissipating quickly and replaced with the overwhelming flutter in his stomach.

And, not for the first time this night, he wonders briefly what it would be like if it were you walking down the aisle; If instead of the sheer, shimmery dress that adorned you beautifully, you were wearing a white one.

As he watched with exuberant joy as one of his closest friends married the one he loved, he couldn’t help but imagine what it would be like if this were his wedding. If it were you walking down the aisle to the ethereal orchestra with your closest friends and family in attendance, all watching with eager rapture at your astounding beauty as he surely would be. But none of them, not a single one of them could ever compare to the intensity of his own stupefied gaze.

He’s imagined the scenario too often, felt tears prick the corner of his eyes every time, and he grows more excited each time he’s fantasized. But nothing gives him more butterflies than the thought of interlocking his hand with yours, placing his ring of eternal promise on your third finger, and avidly vow forever with you.

It’s not like he needs a wedding to promise that; He sees his future every time he looks at you—even if you have your back turned to him and are chatting away unsuspectingly with the fellow attendees.

 But a wedding would be nice, he thinks.

“That’s if he can get married,” Atsumu mutters into his glass cup and takes a long drink of his whiskey.

Bokuto, interrupted from his loving stare at the back of your head, snaps his own head to the blond with the speed to break necks. Eyebrows furrowed, fantasy ruined, and full offense coating his syllables, he exclaims, “Hey! What’s that supposed to mean?”

Shrugging his shoulder nonchalantly, Atsumu leans one elbow on the surface of the bar counter and swirls his drink around, “Ya keep sayin’ yer gonna do it, but how long’s it been? Seven, eight months? If you haven’t done it yet, yer not ever gonna.”

A quick flash of sternness settles into the eyes of their captain, his arm still wrapped around the shoulders of the slowly deflating wing spiker. “He’ll do it when he’s ready, Atsumu. There’s no need to rush something like that.”

Rolling his eyes, Sakusa chimes in from across the three men. Pointing his stare at Koutarou, who resembles a kicked puppy at this point, he sighs. Not one to expel too much effort in emotional comfort, he decides this one is worthy of some kind of attempt. Albeit a minimal one. 

 “Don’t listen to this idiot, Koutarou.”

“‘m jus’ sayin’. She won’t wait for long, man,” Atsumu shrugs his shoulders again, eyes flitting to his right. Out of the corner, Koutarou deflates even more— shoulders slumped and the corners of his mouth downturned noticeably. He huffs out a quiet laugh through his nose.

Step one, complete.

“Since when were you such an expert in what women want?” Sakusa snorts.

“I have experience, thank you very much!” 

“That’s hard to believe.”

Sticking his tongue out at Sakusa, he pointedly ignores the insult to his knowledge of the feminine desires and turns his attention to the subject matter at hand.

Atsumu knows what women, having dated quite a few in his years. More specifically, he knew what you want, considering one drunk evening you had wondered aloud— quite heartachingly in your alcoholic daze, he might add— if the boisterous wing spiker even wanted to marry you. Bokuto, in your words verbatim—

“He just always gets fidgety when I bring it up and I jus’ dunno if he even likes me anymore cause yesterday, he said that my dinner was just ‘okay’ when he always says that he really loves it. Do you know how that made me feel? How could he even want to marry me when I make just ‘okay’ food? Do you know how much he eats? How can he survive!”

And as the ever so loyal friend that Atsumu considers himself to be, who is never one to ever meddle in the business of others, decided it was only right of him to solve this slight problem himself.

By taunting Bokuto, of course. 

If only to make him take matters into his own hands and finally do what everyone has been waiting for. What he knew the poor man has been dying to do forever, considering he never shuts up about you.

And also, to finally have you stop drunk texting him, no matter how endearing he may find them to be.

“So,” Atsumu sings once more, ignoring the look of exasperation on Meian’s face and instead, zoning in on the face of despair before him, “what are ya waiting for?”

In his stupefied stare at the blond beside him, Bokuto finds his gaze once more being drawn back to your turned figure that stands right in his line of sight. Wearing that pretty dress that you face timed him to get his opinion on, smelling of sweet lavender and jasmine— his favorite perfume of yours— and the lip gloss that you begged him not to mess up. He didn’t listen, and truthfully, you hardly minded all that much.

What is he waiting for? He knows what he wants, so why hasn’t he done it yet?

What if you’re growing tired of how long he’s been waiting? What if you’re unhappy that your relationship hasn’t progressed to the next stage? Oh god, what if--

His mouth opens then closes, then opens once again, bottom lip jutting out in a pout. “I… I don’t know.”

“Do ya want to marry her?”

Bokuto nods eagerly, as though through the action alone he could dispel of any lingering doubt that ever had the audacity to pervade his thoughts, “Of course! I don’t want to be with anyone else.”

“Ya think she’s gonna say ‘no’?”

Looking at his two other teammates, who each have their own curiosities piqued at the line of questioning, he shakes his head with finality.

“No. At least, I don’t think so.”

“Then ya just need a push!” Placing his drink on the counter, Atsumu slaps his hand on the man’s shoulder, “How about this: If yer girl catches the bouquet, ya rip the band-aid and ya ask her—”

Stepping in once more, Meian chimes, “Don’t push him to do something he’s not ready for—”

“I ain’t pushin’! He’s got the ring already, right?”

“You do?” All eyes fall onto Bokuto, who stares with widened innocent stare at each of them. He quickly shoves his hand into his pocket, pulling out his fist to reveal a velvet box in his hand. 

“I’ve been carrying it with me every day for the past six months. I just didn’t know if I should do it.”

Three pairs of eyes stare blankly at the man before them. Sharing a quick look at one another, the message is translated seamlessly between each of them and voiced eloquently by Meian himself. Ever the efficient captain.

“Holy shit.”

“My friend,” Atsumu laughs, squeezing his hand on the broad shoulder of his closest friend. His smile, innocent enough to the passing gaze, holds that twinge of mischief that Bokuto has come to know rather intimately; A taunting smile that has been directed his way one too many times that usually never ends well.

“I dare ya to propose to yer girl if she catches that bouquet. If yer really a man, that is.”

Bokuto’s eye twitches, his features narrowed at the utterance of the dare, and that’s how Atsumu knows he’s got him in the bag. It has his own smile widening even further, as Bokuto’s face scrunches in suspicion, knowing full well that he could never resist a dare.

With the single word alone, long gone is the hesitancy and doubt that plagued the man just a moment before, and instead stands a man tall in his ushering of competition. A man who thrives off the challenge, especially wherever his teammate presented one. It’s almost startling how quickly he sheds his mopey behavior and embraces his natural presence, which overwhelms and overpowers everyone around them. 

Step two, done.

“And if she doesn’t?” Bokuto asks, smugness filtering his words as he entertains the notion— silently accepts the provocation laid before him and drastically alters himself in order to successfully combat it. 

In order to win.

Spotting the glint of devilry that grows in strength in the narrowing of Bokuto’s eyes, Atsumu smirks and meets it with one of his own. He’s got him, hook, line, and sinker.

“Ya break up.”

Bokuto reels backward physically, shaken from the competitive trance and staring at the man in grotesque shock. The kind that almost borders anger and offense. Huffing a breath through his nose, he takes a step forward, away from the present comfort of Meian and almost in accusation.

“Are you trying to ruin my life, blondie? You trying to go toe to toe with me, pretty boy?”

Atsumu laughs, holding his hands up in defense, “I’m tryna get ya married, big guy!” Shoving his hands into his pockets, hardly phased by the proximity in which the large man has entrenched onto his space, he shrugs once more, “That is… if yer man enough to take it.”

“Deal,” Bokuto says without hesitation, both incredibly and not at all to the surprise of the other two men who have been silently watching from the sidelines. Like a sudden reset, the tension that resided stiffly in the shoulders of Bokuto rescinds, and replaced is the confident, joyous man. 

A man who looks as though he’s won easy money and then some. 

Smiling widely, Bokuto turns in his place and begins a bold strut away from his friends. In the direction of his beloved, “Excuuuse me, gentlemen. I’m going to go teach my lady how to catch a bouquet.”

Meian and Kiyoomi step to the side, allowing enough space for Bokuto to walk through with the hint of laughter in their small smiles. 

Spinning on his heel and pointing his thumb at his chest, Bokuto exclaims proudly, “This time tomorrow, I will be a married man!”

“One wedding at a time, Kou.” Meian laughs at the retreating man, who is beaming from head to toe.

“Better train ‘er good, big guy! Or else I might be the next one to propose to her!” Atsumu calls out as Bokuto gets closer and closer towards your turned figure.

“I’ll kill you!” He calls back, hearing the echoing laughter diminish as he finally steps beside you.

Turning from the conversation with one of the bridesmaids to the new presence, you shine beautifully upon recognizing who it is, and Bokuto feels his resolve grow almost stronger.

“Hi baby,” You coo, instinctually placing your hand into his and leaning up to place a kiss on his cheek when he quickly presents it to you, “Did you have fun with the boys?”

Wrapping his arm around your waist and pulling you closer, he places his own kiss on your cheek, humming against the surface of the skin yet making no move to part from you. “Mhmm. Just missed you.”

You laugh, rubbing your hand on his arm, “You were only gone for a couple minutes, Kou.”

Trailing his lips downward, he nuzzles himself into your neck, inhaling deeply. Lavender and jasmine. His favorite scent.

The one he wants to smell for the rest of his life.

“Ten minutes is too long.”

If possible, he manages to pull you even tighter against him. Two strong arms wrapping around you, pulling your chest into his and squeezing you tightly. Lovingly and entirely too comforting. Home.

You return the embrace eagerly, holding him to you equally as tight, “You’re right. It was starting to get boring without you.”

His hand, warm and large against the small of your back, rubs the surface up and down before he pulls back slightly, if only to look at your face in its entirety and the lip gloss you have unfortunately reapplied.

“You’re gonna do the bouquet toss, right?”

You raise an eyebrow, “I usually do. Why?”

He glances to the side, avoiding your inquiring stare. He raises a hand from your waist, rubbing the back of his neck with an embarrassed smile, “Maybe we should go outside, and I can throw a couple of rocks at you. Just to practice your catching skills.”

“Kou— “

“Can’t have anyone disrespecting you on the floor, can we? We gotta let everyone know you’re a winner! Cause you’re my girl, and whoever disrespects you, disrespects me! You know? So, you better catch that fucking bouquet. I mean, our relationship is on the line, here!”

“Koutarou—” From the tone in which you say his name, he knows he’s not making any sense. You’re confused, incredibly so, and he can’t blame you. Truthfully, he doesn’t even know what he’s saying, only that he has a goal, and he has to make you see it without revealing himself entirely.

 “I mean, only if you want to. It just… means a lot to me, and I want you to say yes, because I love you. And if you win, I win in a lot of ways. And I want to win with you, for the rest of our lives.”

Realizing almost entirely too late that he was talking with duplicity that you have most certainly caught on towards, he decides there is a good place to stop talking entirely. Oh god, he’s such an idiot. What was he thinking? He can never hide anything from you!

If you couldn’t tell from the way he was talking in metaphors, you could most definitely see it from the way in which sweat beads at the top of his forehead.

Your eyes flicker from each of his, your warm palms cupping the sides of his face as you watch him with concern.

“Baby,” You breathe out, voice steady and calm as you watch his resolve slowly crack under your watchful stare, “Did you want to talk to me about something?”

He tried desperately to remind himself that he has a mission to accomplish, that there was a dare that Atsumu had challenged him to that he must complete—but it’s you. You’re the trump card, the weakness in his defense, his priority above all else. He could never hide anything from you because you would catch him in a quick minute. And truthfully, he doesn’t want to hide anything from you.

It was easy to hide the ring under the guise of waiting for the perfect time, a mental barrier that he could excuse as a good cause behind his hesitancy, but now that he’s accepted a dare that is forcing him to put his desires to immediate use, he can hardly wait for the bouquet toss to arrive.

He’s got to do it now. The time is right, it will never be more perfect. You look beautiful, you’re held tightly in his arms, and he’s never been more convinced of the fact that he loves you. Why has he even waited this long?

He has to do it—Atsumu be damned.

“Marry me.” 

**

Extra:

“You really think she’s going to catch it?” Meian asks Atsumu, as they both watch from afar the way Bokuto wraps himself around your body, nuzzling unabashedly into you.

Atsumu scoffs, “Hell no. Girl can’t catch fer shit.”

Furrowing his brows, Meian stares at the blond with intense confusion, “Then why did you—”

“Just had to plant the idea in his head. He’ll do it soon, jus’ give it a minute.”

The two watch you both silently, noticing the way in which Bokuto pulls away from you and starts to speak rapidly. Neither of them can hear what he’s saying, but they can see his lips moving. More importantly, can see the way in which you stare in perplexion.

Then finally, his lips stop moving and your hands cup his face. The setter and captain feel their breaths hitch and they both lean forward if only to see if they can read the wing spiker’s lips from where they stand.

They can. And from the way you respond with a laugh and an eager kiss, they know it worked.

Looking to Meian, Atsumu raises his brow with a smile, “Told ya!”

end note: to everyone who sent a request, it is on it’s way! i just don’t know the definition of a drabble and instead make 3k long fics, so that’s fun. 

[dovenymph]

little lune

authors note: inspired by @soulmemesarc birthday prompts!🥳🎂 also this is unedited sorry for any typos

" no no no! breakfast in bed for the birthday girl/boy/angel! lie down, let me take care of this... "

" so there's this tradition. a law, really. i have to kiss you as many times as your age. so prepare yourself, babe. "

find my masterlist here

word count: 1.9k

you and harrison really didn’t have much in common.

this, you discovered, on your first date. he’d seen you at his neighborhood coffee shop on multiple occasions and prayed each day that you couldn’t see the infatuation building in his eyes, hoping one day soon, he’d’ve built up the courage to finally talk to you.

and you both thank god that that day had come and you spent nearly the entire day tucked away in the corner of the cafe talking about everything and anything.

he loved dogs, liked to consider himself a dog dad, even though the blue-grey staffy he showed you just over one million pictures of, technically belonged to his best friend. you on the other hand, grew up with cats curled up at your feet.

harrison could stay out all night, and did most weekends! very used to having to scrub last nights remnants off his body in the mornings and piecing together the events through blurry instagram stories. whereas, you were much more lowkey. always down for a good time, but couldn’t really stand the feeling of other people’s sweat on you while packed in a crowded club

despite this, the two of you fit together like puzzle pieces. like he was the sun, and you were the moon.

when harrison first brought up the comparison, you laughed and teased him for being such a cliche but when he smiled down and replied with “just for you, my little lune”

your face burned under his palms as he spoke the pet name so adoringly and with so much kindness in his eyes. and in that moment, you both knew that your differences in opinion were trivial and the only thing that mattered was you both bonded over your growing affection.

your face burned under his palms as he spoke the pet name so adoringly and with so much kindness in his eyes. and in that moment, you both knew that your differences in opinion were trivial and the only thing that mattered was you both bonded over your growing affection.

there was one thing you both had in common though and that was sleep.

there was one thing you both had in common though and that was sleep.

you could sleep for hours each, harrison very proudly bragging that his record was 18 hours straight.

whenever you went over to his house, he immediately locked the two of you in his room, receiving many suggestive comments from his roommates about the nature of your activities, but in reality he just locked his arms around you and took you to dreamland with him as the two of you slept the day away.

so it was no surprise that that was the position you both were in right now, the morning of your birthday slipping away like a handful of sand through open fingertips.

soon enough though, the ring of your phone had gone off too many times for you to ignore and you had to wake up and face the multitude of happy birthday calls you were receiving, without a doubt waking your boyfriend in the process.

“mmm, tell them to fuck off” he muttered as your cousin wished you a happy birthday, the phone being passed around to all your relatives.

“can’t babe, m’family’s callin’”

“b-but… we haven’t had a birthday snuggle yet”

the softness in his tone (his teddy bear persona being reserved for your eyes only) practically melted you “almost over, m’love”

five minutes later, the last of your cousins and aunts and uncles had wished you a happy birthday and you hung up, the multiple conversations taking away any last shreds of slumber.

you looked over at haz who had his face smushed into the pillow, his soft, blond hair swept into his face, looking as delicate as ever. his hands involuntarily twitching at the comforter as they called out for yours to intertwine with.

with a smile you cautiously slipped off the bed, but he still awoke anyways, poking his head up like a child. “where ya going?”

“to start the kettle, go back to sleep.”

“no no no!” he whined “breakfast in bed for the birthday girl. lie down, let me take care of this.” he dragged himself out of bed, placed a tender and loving kiss to your forehead before shoving you to the mattress and throwing the covers over your entire body, leaving you nothing but a giggling white sheet.

his heart soared in his chest at the sound as he made his way to your kitchen. he’d only been over your place a few times, your relationship still relatively new. so he tried his best to quietly turn on the kettle and then locate your pots and pans to get started on a birthday breakfast for you.

as he was flipping the pancakes, he started thinking about making a little smile with the strawberries and that brought a little smile to his face.

he barely recognized himself when he was around you. he was so lovesick, so head over heels for you. unlike he’d ever been with any of his previous girlfriends.

your relationship wasn’t in the early stages per-say, he openly called you his girlfriend, and you your boyfriend, but he still felt the need to impress you, he still felt nerves creep in his stomach before every date. the honeymoon stage, as some liked to call it. the comfortability was just around the corner, he was sure of it. but until then, he liked to keep you on your toes.

placing the meal on a tray and walking back to your bedroom, he thought to later tonight and bit his lip. he had planned something for you, something grand. it was a little much for your first birthday spent together, but he only realized that after everything was payed for; but you deserved it. you deserved all the magnificent things life had to offer, and he would fall to his knees in order to be the one to give them to you. so he hoped you would like it.

“happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you, happy birthday my darling, happy birthday to you” he sung as you looked up at him from under the covers.

“thank you, lovie. it looks great.” you smiled and he carefully placed the tray on your lap, crawling up next to you.

“anything for you, lune.” he spoke with a kiss to your lips.

that was how the morning progressed, bites of pancake shared here and there, syrup flavored kisses peppered in between.

.・゜゜・　　・゜゜・．

haz’s wet chest was pressed against your back in the bath. the room scented vanilla and filled to the brim with bubbles and candlelight.

“what do you want to do later today, haz?”

“anything you like sweetness, you’re the birthday girl.”

“hmm, nothing planned big guy?” you teased, and he splashed a little water on your exposed torso.

“of course i do… but, it’s still your day, you can do whatever you want.” he replied, pressing kisses to your neck.

“whatever i want?”

“mmhmm, have whatever, do whatever… have me do whatever you want… to you” he spoke, voice deep and kisses hard.

your heart rate picked up, sure he could sense it as he pressed his tongue to your pressure point, gasping you consented with “i like the sound of that”

.・゜゜・　　・゜゜・．

“haz… can you at least slow down???”

“sorry! sorry! it’s not my fault i swear!” he retorted, swerving in and out of his lane.

“yeah well i can’t exactly tell now can i?” you snapped, feeling around the blindfold he insisted you wore

“hey! don’t mess with it! we’re almost there!” harrison looked over at you and worried his bottom lip in nervousness. the location was only down the road and every possibility was running through his head. did he invite enough of your friends? sure you got along with his housemates and coworkers, but he didn’t want you to feel awkward at your own party. was it too much, would you feel too pressured?

he turned into the parking lot and took a deep breath, you were here now, so it was now or never. “can i take it off now?”

“yes, sweetness.”

you yanked it off and immediately looked around, face contorting in confusion.

“cmon, it’s around the corner.” he grabbed your hand and started to make his way.

“i- i hope you like it. if you don’t that’s fine, we can do something else. i swear! no pressure really, this, this is really just an idea. but i thought it seemed fun, so i, yeah, again, i just hope you like it.” he rambled, about to add on another reassurance that you could leave whenever you wanted when your gasp interrupted him.

“woah…” you took in the field before you. fair games, food trucks, rides and even a ferris wheel covered the entire ground. your friends already enjoying the festivities.

“haz this… this is amazing…” your head snapped towards his as you thew yourself into his arms. “th-thank you so much, oh my god!”

harrison knew that if you weren’t anchoring him in that moment, he would’ve floated to heaven. you were so sweet and happy, he was more than elated.

“it’s all for you, babe. let’s go enjoy, yeah?” he said, pride running through his veins at the good job he did.

you found your friends, all giving you bear hugs and dragging you away from harrison to go on rides. he didn’t mind, he got to spend all day with you, and you were too good not to share.

he sat at one of the picnic benches as tom brought over two slices of pizza. “mate, i gotta say, this is fucking awesome”

harrison beamed at him at the compliment. “yeah i know!”

tom laughed and shook his head, “wanna call you a smug div, but honestly, y’should be proud of yourself.”

harrison felt his cheeks warm at his friends words. “thanks mate, i- i’m just glad she likes it.”

tom let out a *whapush* noise, “so whipped.” and harrison just rolled his eyes, but bit back any denials. he was whipped for you. not only did the thousands in pounds he spent for tonight prove it, but the way his heart danced in his chest at the mere though of you, did too.

“yeah, i guess i am” he smirked, meeting tom in a fist bump and beelined towards you.

you felt his arms wrap around your waist from behind as you spoke to your friend, her eyes lighting up at the scene.

“mind if i steal her for a moment?” he asked, giving your friend his best puppy eyes, to which she giggled and shook her head, sending you a wink on her way.

“y’alright, birthday girl?” he muttered, head buried in your neck.

“more than alright. thank you again haz, i really, i really don’t know how i can make this up to you.”

he spun you around in his arms and gave you a passionate kiss, trying to convey all his love through it, hopefully telling you that you didn’t have to make anything up to him, that he’d buy you the earth if it’d make you smile.”

when he pulled away, you stared up at him like he was a figure from your dreams and he thinks you understood him.

“cmon, let’s go on the ferris wheel!”

“lead the way, lune.”

.・゜゜・　　・゜゜・．

the night sky surrounded you both as you at at the top of the ferris wheel, looking down at the city.

“so…,” harrison began. you hummed in response and he squeezed your clasped hands together.

“so there's this tradition. a law, really. i have to kiss you as many times as your age. so prepare yourself, babe.”

you laughed and scooted impossibly closer to him, “oh yeah?”

“mmhmm! now remember, i don’t make the laws, only enforce them.”

he began to count upwards from one and kiss your lips. some soft and light, others held out and leaving you a little breathless.

“so many kisses tonight, i love it”

“well there’s more where that came from.” he said, “now where was i? oh right, 16…”

[absolutebl]

This Week In BL

April 2021 Part 5

Being a highly subjective assessment of one tiny corner of the interwebs.

Ongoing Series - Thai

Close Friend Ep 2 (JaFirst) - First is a cat. No actually a cat. It was WEIRD. Cute, but creeping towards beastiality. It reminded me of that strange series out of China (@heretherebedork says Youth in the Breeze). The most amusing thing to me was that the cat used Thai formal linguistic register when of course cats would use informal rude guu mueng with EVERYONE. No cat would use pom. Don’t be ridiculous, Thailand. 

Second Chance Ep 5 - still invested, things progressed for all 3 couples, in one direction or another. They cuties. I love them. Carry on. 

Y-Destiny Ep 5 - the “virgin scoreboard” is gonna make the seme real hard to redeem with this pairing. If they bother. This might be a life lesson episode. What does it remind me of? Oh yes. Kids. *SHUDDER* Point of interest: did you notice Team uses ha with Mon? What a pushy flirt. 

Lovely Writer Ep 10 - honestly I just love it when Poppy shows up in anything, why is he such a delightful screen presence? (Gene’s brother) Sorry, distracted. What happened in this one? Oh, ya know, stuff and things. Family drama. (It is just me or have they been giving us some long ass episodes lately?) Obligatory beach trip activated. (Result = dumb probability mathematics jokes.) Next week it looks like we have Keeping Actor’s Closeted 101. You know the Casting Couch? This is the Casting Closet. 

Fish Upon The Sky Ep 4 - early stage confession, how fun. It’s not unprecedented it just usually means we are in 4 act structure, not 3, which means Fish might go more serious than I thought. Honestly? I’m losing interest mostly because I’ve gone from mild annoyance to active dislike of Pi. Happened to me with Tine too. They better redeem this obtuse tsundere uke soon or he’s not tsundere at all he’s just a jackwit. 

Brothers Ep 13 fin - a kiss and the family finds out about the not-so-brotherly brothers, drama, graduation, THE END. My side-dish happy heart made thumps over Q + delivery boy, I’m sad they got so little screen time. My babies KhunKaow did get a tiny coming out sequence as such. I’m seriously considering doing myself a bootleg of just the KhunKaow plot, but that means I’d have to rewatch the whole darn series and I can’t STAND the idea. Which should give you insight into how not good this show it. Very NOT good. Must we get a season 2? Please stop now, Line. 

Ongoing Series - Not Thai

HIStory 4: Close To You (Taiwan) Ep 7 - Muren is the cutest peanut and anyone who says otherwise can fight me, although they probably have to go through Licheng first. I was NOT invested in these two at the beginning, but as a couple? They own my soul. The other storyline is still the dumpster fire that I can’t decide to roast marshmallows over (knowing they’ll get tinged with eu de trash) or flee from in horror clutching my pearls and my nose. H4 continues to provide the quality psyche torture I’ve come to expect from this franchise. *sarcastic thumbs up*  *** A word on seeing Boxiang show up (side dish from H3:MODC). It was an unexpected pleasure, I loved his pairing (May/December is a winner for me *glares at Method*) but I do think it was a bone from the franchise telling us that we are never getting that spin-off or reboot that people yearn for. However, how AWESOME that Licheng has someone to go to and ask about topping properly. Otherwise he’s sure to have screwed it up. (Pun intended.) 

Papa & Daddy (Tailwan) Ep 1-2 - this came out of nowhere and is ADORABLE. Applies a ton of BL tropes (cheek kiss, his closet, B&W stripes, drag baby around, boop) but what IS it? More slice of gay domesticity than romance. Like 2019′s Kinou Nani Tabeta? or currently airing Close Friend. I enjoy this style, very wholesome, but I’m not sure what to call it. (Bonus points for cutie lesbians.) A bit weird to have a kid with your partner and STILL not be out to your parents. I hope they aren’t going to throw in a break up for dramatic effect. 

My Lascivious Boss (Vietnam) Ep 4 - I’m really enjoying this series. It’s unabashedly queer, although there’s some problematic stuff lurking under the wig. How it ends is gonna dictate if they handled this stylishly. But hot damn the leads ZING on screen together and their crackling prank-flirting is a joy to watch. 

Word of Honor (China) Ep 31-33 - moving into the home stretch. Big rescue and the band is back together (presumably for the final slaughter). Then a death! *this is my shocked face* Did I tear up? Of course I did. 4 act structure is designed for maximum pathos during the final 1/4. Did we all faint from the symbolism of the love token hair stick being gently thrust into Ah Xu’s bun? Sure we did. All that and sill I’m flagging. This is a long-arse show. Save me, Korea, with your iItsy bitsy teenie weenie...

Nobleman Ryu’s Wedding (Korea) Ep 5-6 - I am getting such strong 12th Night vibes from this. Tae Hyung is now brigadier of BL’s historical himbo brigade. (To be deployed whenever you are in need of poetry or a cut sleeve.) This show is all ridiculous charm and I LOVE it. Although, five seconds of Lee Sang is not enough Lee Sang. I had to immediately rewatch Wish You. 

Gossip

Nitiman gave us an actor intro BTS teaser. 

Kang In Soo (AKA Kyang Insoo) posted a cute behind the photo shoot of Nobleman Ryu’s Wedding plus a silly interview with Jang Eui Soo on his YouTube channel (you should subscribe, it’s a fun channel, his fitness regime is both insane and inspiring). 

My Engineer 2 dropped a couch interview with the boys but it feels like one that was filmed a while ago (oh and no subs).  

STARTING SOON: Nitiman, Love Area, Top Secret Together, Be Loved in House, & I Promised You The Moon  

Nitiman (Thai) May 7, One 31. University set, moons, engineering students, enemies to lovers, adapted. - Looks to be a solid 2 Moons knock off, I’m in.

Love Area (Thai) May 8, AIS Play, 10 eps total. Restaurant set, stars Pak Chavitpong (the only good thing about Cupid Coach) and the OST is sung by Jeff Satur (Ingredients). - It’s boys in love revolving around food = my kryptonite, try to stop me from watching this probable trash. 

Top Secret Together (Thai) May 14, Line TV. 5 couples, one IRL (Newyear from I Am Your King), story arcs revolve around secrets.  - I’m getting fatigued by these multi-couple sampler pack dramas, but I’ll try it for Newyear’s sake.  

Be Loved in House: I Do (Taiwan YES!) May 20, Viki. Office set, relationships prohibited at work by a new boss, one of the employees is determined to figure out why. Grumpy/tsundere pairing so loads of drama. - I am so flipping excited for this one. A 4th BL series from Taiwan in less than a year? That’s unprecedented. GO BABY ISLAND GO! 

I Promised You the Moon (Thai) May 27, Line TV. Follow up to I Told Sunset About You with the boys now at university. - I won’t be watching this as I have yet to finish season 1. 

Possibly Gameboys season 2.  - Rumors are all over the place right now on this. 

Next Week Looks Like This: 

Some shows may be listed later than actual air date for International accessibility reasons. 

Upcoming 2021 BL master post here.

Links to watch are provided when possible, ask in a comment if I missed something.

[rataltouille]

FORCE MAJEURE: NOVEL INTRO

[this is my original work, do not use / repurpose / plagiarise in any form]

GENRE: literary fiction.

SETTING: south india, early 2010s.

POV & TENSE: dual pov; present tense + third person limited.

STAGE: prepping for camp nano [my current goal for camp is 10k!]

THEMES + AESTHETICS: fatalism, chance and luck, the duality of everything, corruption, chaos vs order, manipulation, power, sacrifice, loneliness, free will, love vs obsession. the sound of waves crashing against rocks, sitting in an empty house and watching a watery dawn, saltwater seeping into your pores as you swim deeper and deeper underwater; driving through neon cities under a full moon, laughter mixing with the bright sounds of people, the buzz of contact in a room full of strangers.

CONTENT WARNINGS: cults and religious trauma, implications + discussions of emotional abuse, terrible parents, manipulation, gaslighting. [note: this wip is very new so more content warnings may be added as i go]

SUMMARY:

when twins ananya and naveen get separated while escaping their home, they find themselves in completely different places—one stumbling onto a hidden commune by the beach, the other pulled into a group of thieves in the city. this story is a dark coming-of-age where the twins must confront their obsessions with things they can’t control and what they’re willing to do to belong.

aka “i know everything happens for a reason but what the fuck”

CHARACTERS:

omg my children <3 [all picrew credits to @/sagravi’s picrew!]

ANANYA [pronounced as: uh-nun-yah]

she/they [she’s very non-binary but doesn't have the term for it in the book? so in my head she uses she/they but in the book uses she/her]

looks like she can kill you, will instead make you fall in love and slowly [and unknowingly] break your heart <3

“have you ever seen a woman so beautiful you started crying?”

unintentionally funny. says something mean and people will laugh not realising she actually meant it

carries around a lot of anger about the multiple ways in which people have wronged her and now and then just goes feral [as she should, really]

aroace and has a very longterm, very on screen crisis about it. what i learnt from this is that i cannot write an uplifting aroace story and tbh i don't know what that says about me as someone who’s also aroace.

very emotionally attached to her parents :) very emotionally detached from people in general :) suffering™

does not have a good time

NAVEEN [pronounced as: nuh-veen]

he/him [also very non-binary]

looks baby, is actually very sad

“i do not have a fake social media personality. i am genuinely this mentally ill in real life”

unintentionally unfunny. he cries himself to sleep at night because his puns weren’t well received [me too honestly]

very queer!! he’s mspec but doesn’t label himself, and honestly king <3 he also gets caught in a bisexual love triangle. the way i was anti-love triangles until this guy appeared🧍

was always the twin who was idolised and seen as the family’s future which not only put a lot of pressure on him but also strained his relationship with ananya in unexpected ways which is just :(

does not have a good time

literally i fell in love with the twins so quickly; they are so cool and are most definitely my genvy. their relationship is very central to the story despite them being separated for the most of it [if the story plays out that way]. i’m excited to actually start drafting to learn more about them + their dynamic!!

SO HOW’D THIS HAPPEN?

so a few days ago my brain said “new fun ya contemporary concept about queer twins in high school” and then within five minutes of its existence my brain also said “contemporary ya my ass it’s now adult litfic deal with it” and at this point i’m just like. okay.

this book is my second novel and also my *bangs posts and pans* camp nano wip! [please as if i haven't mentioned this seventy times already] coincidentally my academic year + finals also end on the first of april so this is such a perfect time to start a new project!!

ALSO i’m jumping on the trend of making a temporary taglist for weekly updates like all the cool, sexy writeblrs who are doing it [read as: atlas fam] so!! let me know [dm/ask/reply/mention in reblog] if you want to be added to the camp nano taglist!! if you want to keep up with the wip after camp, you can ask to be added to my general taglist. heads up that i won't be tagging my general taglist for the weekly updates!!

everything about this project is tagged as force majeure and the writing updates as force majeure update. also here’s the link to the very very in-progress playlist. you can send me an ask / message me if you’d like to be added to my taglist or have any questions about the project. and that’s about it for now!!

[jwowwsboobs]

so im just thinking abt my girlies. artery … i already kind of sort of talked abt how sexism in the metal scene impacted jack in relation 2 her drug and alcohol issues but i didnt go into how it impacted anyone else in the band which like im gonna be honest i think abt jack the most. i will admit im not above favoritism w my “blorbos” (feminine) but thats not the point the point is i totally wanna talk abt the rest of them too! n so im making this random ass post abt it bc i just lovvvvvvveeeeeeeee hearing myself talk. anyway i have no good transition 👍 hope someone out there enjoys this messy delusional ranting :) its like 1.4k words or something sorry not sorry n im not adding a read more. scroll fast or something idc

some background: artery was founded in 1981 by max(ine) kennedy (vox + rhythm guitar) n ronnie young (drums), who l8r enlisted gale barker (bass) n obviously jack walsh (lead guitar). their discography consists of “Dig Yr Grave” (demo, december’81), “Spitfire” (demo, june 82), No Mercy, No Peace (album, feb 83), Total Annihilation (album, jan 84), and Death (album, may 85).

also btw gale is black n ronnie is hispanic (potentially) im still trying 2 figure out if/how racism may fit/fits into the band’s eventual implosion which i will! but bear in mind this is all very much a work in progress n i dont have everything fleshed out n it may change over time etc etc etc. 

okay okay so max was never the most confident frontman (woman? person? whatever). most of her what she wore both on stage n off in the early days/pre- n during the no mercy no peace “era” was baggy band shirts n plain jeans, usually flared but not always (around 84 she sorta shifted 2 skinny/regular jeans onstage but wore flares offstage occasionally). gale prefered 2 be comfortable onstage n off, often wearing tank tops or a band shirt cut into a muscle tee with jeans or combat pants when onstage or pj pants, sweatpants, or other loose pants when offstage. jack wore the same venom shirt n straight leg jeans 4 probably her entire career. they smelled like shit btw but they burried her in it anyway cuz it was 4 sure what she would have wanted. ronnies personal style was a little more feminine than the other girls in the band, preferring halter tops and heels when off-duty and home in california while the other girls stuck with their tee shirts and sneakers, but wore jeans and tee shirts just like the rest of them cuz surprise surprise its so much easier n faster 2 throw on the closest shirt n jeans 2 u than 2 come up with a whole outfit while on tour in a shitty van with four other ppl. 

so ya in the early days when max trying 2 avoid attention 4 being a Girl In A Band(TM) she wore more basic, nondescript clothes. which didnt rlly do much cuz her voice is…idk mezzo-soprano or contralto i think more contralto but that is beside the point the point is she is a girl n when she sings you know its a girl singing. n this stressed her out cuz she didnt want the focus 2 be on the fact that they were an all female band making loud, fast music, she wanted the focus 2 be on the music.

ronnie was less concerned with being taken seriously as musicians than she was with sounding and looking good as a band. her preference was that they have a cohesive, consistent look, she didnt really care what it was as long as they stuck 2 it. 

so in the early days, artery agreed that they thought it would be best 2 keep their image in promotional materials shadowy n vague, often relying on images taken live where their hair mostly obscured their faces, they were in motion. or obscured by drums, in the case of ronnie. 

this didnt really fly when they moved over 2 a major label 4 their 2nd album. they, as a band, continued 2 insist on wearing what they normally wore (jeans, tee shirts, battle vest etc.) in interviews, in photo shoots, on stage, while the label tried 2 push them towards more sexually charged, “feminine” clothes and more glamorous, labor intensive hairstyling (especially 4 gale, who whould have had 2 straighten her hair regularly) and makeup.

nobody was happy with this. max was unhappy bc she felt pressured 2 be something she wasnt n didnt want 2 be, gale was unhappy bc she felt that presenting themselves in a more glamorous way was opposited 2 their sound n roots in punk rock and the image the label was attempting 2 push had racist, eurocentric undertones, jack was unhappy cuz she would have had 2 actually brush her hair and agreed w gale, n ronnie was unhappy cuz everyone else was. luckily the label did eventually give up on trying 2 push their image in a specific way, cuz of the band’s vehement n intensive pushback against changing their image. but while artery was fighting with the label, they were also fighting with interviewers asking them insufferably sexist questions. jack for example, was not allowed 2 be interviewed on her own cuz she would generally physically assault someone who asked her something stupid like “whats it like being a girl in a band?” or “how do u ladies all manage that time of the month?” n etc. just anything that wasnt related 2 the music, tour, album etc shed tend 2 get pissed abt. n while most of the bands they played shows w or went on tour were cool, there was still the occasional asshole in a band they were playing w, asshole fans on tour, asshole security, etc. ronnie once left some stuff in their van on the tour 4 total annihilation n went out 2 get it w/o her backstage pass, n when she tried 2 get back in, was refused entry bc there was a no groupie policy. ronnie spent probably 20 minutes trying 2 convince the dude that no, she was actually in one of the bands playing. eventually the tour manager came out 2 get her after jack (who had her pass but not ronnies) found her n tried 2 get her in (security would not let either of them in and mistook jack 4 a dude). occasionally drunk male fans would find their way 2 the hotel they were staying in n harass, or try 2 harass, the band. max was a particular focus of these fans, n often carried pepper spray when on tour, and became more n more paranoid about her safety as time went on. the band briefly took some self-defense martial arts classes together in late 84 as a part of jack’s first (n only) rehab stint, n 2 help max combat her paranoia n anxiety.

gale got some shit 4 being black n being in a metal band but not much as far as i know cuz she didnt exactly put herself out in the public “sphere” the way ronnie, jack n max did. yeah she played shredding 6, 7 minute bass solos live n chatted w fans n came 2 the parties w everyone else n did the interviews like everybody else (sans jack), but she didnt really want 2 be in the limelight off stage the way ronnie, w her immense love of being interviewed n saying outrageous things just cuz she could, did. max was in the limelight whether she liked it or not (she didn’t like it) which messed her up n was part if why, after artery disbanded early late 85/early 86, she disappeared off the face of the earth (<- exaggeration but kind of accurate.) i think one of the reasons jack jumped intensely into drugs n alcohol was bc she felt ignored off stage, n wanted 2 prove 2 the other ppl that the band was touring w that she was as badass as the rest of them, she could drink as much as/more than them etc etc etc i went over this in the tags of the other post. n also she was just insane w many mental issues 👍 i dunno much abt what in particular i just know she struggled n then od’d n died. max also struggled w alcohol, especially on artery’s tours bc she was trying 2 use it 2 be more relaxed n outgoing when performing. i believe ronnie tried coke during artery’s final tour. gale smoked weed recreationally n 2 this day is a big proponent of legalizing marijuana in the US.

i think i covered just abt every i wanted 2 cover! 🍻🍻 thanks 4 listening or whatever sorry if it makes no sense im not doing super well