#i know he doesnt look like shen yuan

[starry-bi-sky]

mmmm musical cultivator shen yuan again. Feng Xuanlu, the Wind Song. He has this well-loved wooden pipe he inherited from is adoptive father that he uses on occasion. When the traveling day gets slow and he doesn't feel like singing, when he's stressed, when night falls and he's sitting around a fire with his troupe and they've all had a little bit to drink.

His hair is long and black, always tied up into a ponytail or a braid of some sort. When he's in camp he loosens it up until its splayed messily over his shoulder. He has crows feet around his eyes that scrunch up when he smiles. His eyes are bamboo green and his hands are rough and callused from years of plucking strings and work. He has scars on his back that he won't explain the origins of.

His voice is low and warm like a fire, it gets raspy in the mornings or when he's been humming or singing for too long. He speaks like there's sunshine dripping off his tongue. He speaks soft, he speaks and his voice takes up the entire room. He's spent over a decade hearing his praises getting sung and he still gets shy over it sometimes.

Whenever he goes into town he has to have at least three other musicians with him at all times -- not his decision of course, but the unanimous choice of his companions. Shen Yuan gathers admirers everywhere he goes, and his companions have long since learned that their dear friend and leader is completely unaware of it. So they have to beat off these suitors with sticks.

[koipalm]

I know the attendant!sy is a liushen fic but... I'm sorry, but my brain literally can't stop turning SQQ's and SY's relationship over a fire like a very juicy roast. Not even in a slash way just... Like, a god tried to stuff Some Guy in his body, failed, made him a new one and SQQ's brilliant idea was to adopt him as an overworked TA/stray cat. The guy is from a different world entirely, knows just about everything about this world and hates his guts. He has a very good reason to hate his guts. That's fine tho, SQQ believes this is a perfectly normal reaction to him because he literally can't concieve someone NOT hating him. SY being grudgingly grateful is the highest level of regard SQQ is capable of tolerating/understanding. He hates his guts back and yet still takes care of him. He overworks him to the point everybody thinks SY is gonna drop dead any minute and thinks this is perfectly normal, that was how SQQ lived 90% of his life. This man should not be within hearing distance of a child and pounced on the opportunity to put a socially acceptable buffer between himself and his disciples. Tearing his limbs off wouldn't be enough to admit he cares one iota about SY and yet he's probably planning ten different ways to discreetly poison LQG if he so much as looks at SY. This is probably the best relationship (non-romantic or otherwise) SQQ has in his life rn and if that doesn't terrify everyone who hears about it then I don't know what does.

Just. Slowly turning all this over a firepit in my brain.

ive tried to write like 5 different replies to this and theyre all incoherent AUGHHH anyway lets just get into it

one of the most interesting things that i wanted to explore in this au was if sqq and sy had to exist in somewhat close proximity to each other. the truth of the situation is that sqq is actually a lot more lax about watching sy than shen yuan makes it out to be. in reality a lot of sqq's outward expression towards shen yuan is very blank or dismissive. sqq will only really step in if he thinks that someone is trying to take shen yuan away from him. but if shen yuan was in actual physical danger like a demonic beast or a roof caving in, sqq would not move to help him. AHHHH its hard to explain super clearly.

shen qingqiu sees shen yuan as something that is "his" in a more metaphysical sense. although the system could have torn his life apart and shen yuan could have ruined his image and stolen his place, that didnt happen, and instead, shen qingqiu was given essentially an ace-in-the-hole. shen yuan, to him, was almost divinely given, even if it was by divine fuck-up.

shen qingqiu would see shen yuan being in danger as basically natural selection though. he wouldnt keep someone around that couldnt handle themselves, so shen yuan has to get out of conflicts himself. if someones tries to take shen yuan from him though, thats pretty much interfering with the will of the gods, and trying to take someone from qing jing peak (his assistant specifically), so in that instance, shen qingqiu would step in

its interesting tho, shen qingqiu really does just see shen yuan as an assistant. a divinely ordained assistant, but still

[mymoshangthoughts]

okay, okay, okay, bear with me

mobei jun already knows about shang qinghua as airplane

oki ive decided to take advantage of the fact that WE NEVER GET A MOBEI JUN POV AND I'LL BE FORVER SALTY ABOUT THAT SHIT

but like, shen yuan figured airplane out REAL fast, right? they barely spent time together before the immortal alliance and then it takes one surprise before airplane is saying stupid shit, right?

and i cant help but think, mobei jun aint dumb and he's been spending How Many Years crashing at shang qinghua's leisure house whenever the fuck he feels like it?

he also finds shang qinghua to be Hella Sus because come on, ofc he does. a human just declares their undying loyalty to you after one fucking meeting??? even if he believes shang qinghua is being sincere in the moment, the fact that he was so quick to betray his sect doesnt speak of a loyal servant

so why wouldnt he snoop? why wouldnt he pay extra close attention when shang qinghua says shit that doesnt make sense? why wouldnt he notice when shang qinghua speaks or writes in a language that he doesnt recognize? airplane canonically isnt fluent in english so if he used a bit of it, especially chinglish, wouldnt mobei jun be able to learn some of the meanings of the words just by context clues? especially when he has YEARS to decode it? like if airplane was fluent, maybe he could hide the meaning, but a limited vocabulary adapted to another language isnt actually super hard to decode. it's the same reason that you can generally understand what slang means before you look up the definition. you might not know what 'rizz' means, but you can pick up the meaning from context clues.

anyway im over explaining the linguistic aspects ALL IM SAYING IS what if airplane kinda depends heavily on chinglish to be his Secret Language that Theres No Way That Anyone Here Can Get. and sure, for most people, it does seem like gibberish. but again, mobei jun has YEARS at his side and reasons to nitpick at it and decode it.

like what if airplane had a habit of writing out pidw plot points in chinglish bc look he is Going to forget shit no matter what, he wrote that novel a lifetime ago, but theres some info thats pretty important for him to Not Forget. so mobei jun is just left with a huge stash of Impossible Information that shang qinghua writes about

everything ranging from future events to obscure demon world facts that theres just no justifiable reason for shang qinghua to know about and just everything in between.

but also what if shang qinghua wrote his feelings? his thoughts? his issues? like cmon, he literally has NO ONE to consult with about the insanity of his life before cucumber-bro, and his life is really crazy, and he used to be the person who wrote out his feelings via novel but look dude he's not about to tempt fate by writing out another novel rn so a diary makes sense. or at least like, random venting

and again, this isnt even mentioning airplane having some potential verbal fuckups that mobei jun can add to his ever growing file of "shang qinghua has something fucking going on"

and like, maybe mobei jun hasnt actually figured out the exact truth but he has some eerily close guesses. or maybe airplane wrote a lengthy journal explaining literally his entire fucked up life and mobei jun knows Everything.

look im just a little bit obsessed with mobei jun casually being aware for YEARS that shang qinghua is from another world and might have once had god-like powers over this world. i think this is very funny and i think it could work in a canon compliant way. cuz i also like to think that some of mobei jun's aggro at shang qinghua was a mixture of

you literally wont tell me who you really are. you claim to be my loyal subject but you wont even tell me your real name and Yes I'm Upset About That

you fucking fucker, you literally PLANNED that horrible event to happen???? you suck so bad omfg. THAT WAS TRAUMATIZING FOR ME YOU JERK NO I DONT CARE IF YOU FEEL BAD ABOUT IT NOW

your handwriting sucks and im mad that i didnt just have to decode your weird other language, i also had to decode your fucking horrendous handwriting and i dont know if i can ever forgive you for that

you barely ever show your real personality in front of me and i have to learn how you really feel by reading this fucking notes and YES IM UPSET ABOUT THAT

i also just love the idea of Something Happening to do with the multiverse and basically mobei jun is the only one who isnt remotely surprised lmfao. binghe is in crisis mode, cucumber thinks he's gonna die, airplane is freaked out, and mobei jun is just like "yeah, figured some dumb shit like this might happen. you didnt know binghe? dont you pay any attention to your husband :/ dude, they're not even good at hiding it, i thought you were supposed to be smart"

also the simultaneous heartattacks that cucumber and airplane would have that mobei jun just KNOWS like thats hilarious. imagine they need to talk about something secretly in public and its super urgent and mobei jun just starts using chinglish or webspeak or something perfectly and cumplane are FREAKING THE FUCK OUT

mobei jun: that mofo is hella sus, but keep it on the dl. ttyl i need to do a vibe check

cumplane: ?!?!?!?!?!?

[wafywaify]

im so tired but i want to get this out before i forget. this might end up uncomprehensible byt whatever. anyways.

shen qingqiu. shizun. shen yuan, right? that guy. for some reason i have this really strange itch that just- a singer shen yuan au would cure. like im thinking barbie princess and the pauper type singer au. like he was transmigrated a bit after uh binghes blakening ig. maybe he just got out of the abyss, right? on his way to go torture his shizun and all that gof stuff.

shen yuan was just placed into this npc type guy, not relevant to the plot really. maybe hes a brother to uh one of bingges future wife? but anyways, his family's pretty poor so they do all they can to make a few extra coins. he finds out he has a pretty nice voice from um, singing his little sister to sleep? something sweet like that. his family urges him to give it a try, telling him everyone would love his voice. after getting over his embarrassment, he gives it a shot. I imagine he like tries to remember certain songs from yknow. barbie.. barbie songs. i love Barbie.

and hes all like "well no ones gonna recognize it ill just say i wrote it its fineeee" and then that kind of backfires on him when airplane stumbles upon a random dude singing "i need to know" from the hit barbie movie babrie as the island princess. (im just like you, youre just like me!!) actually it'd be funny if he only sung barbie songs. like theyre just melted into his brain after all the times his little sister had forced him to watch them with her. anyways, they hit it off.. in more ways then one. that sounds like a sex joke, its not. im implying he beat bro up. pidw author and all.

anways uh maybe airplane like helps him out and like they get shen yuan to start performing for like important things. idk. uh. good entertainment for the richer ppl yknow. hes become pretty popular now. its hard to book him, with all the requests hes getting now. now this is where bingge comes in. bro needs a performer for an upcoming.. wedding? i guess? he needs to entertain guests so he books the most popular guy right? shen yuan, upon realizing binghe, the heavenly demon emperor, wants to hire him, absolutely freaks out.

he doesnt want anything to do with the protagonist!! he was living a pretty good life!! and every man that comes into contact with binghe either ends in a gruesome death or are thrown into cellars! thats just how pidw was written!! so obviously, the best course of action is to ignore it! ignore everything! uhhh.. bad idea, really. he basically just sends a letter back saying "haha sorry cant, busy!!!"

and binghe.. binghe does not take that all too well. who would've thought. not shen yuan. who dared ignore the literal emperor!? conqueror of realms??!! and so, he sets out to go see for himself how "busy" this lowly singer is!! que dramatic scene where binghe walks into a pub and theres like at least 50 or so people crowded to the back. hes confused at first, before he hears this almost angelic voice. it seems to wash over the entire pub, entrancing its residents. like a siren calling out.

there isnt exactly a "stage" in this pub, so he cant really see whos singing. he quickly makes his way towards the crowd and pushed his way through. after the people realize who he is, its easy enough. his eyes land on one of the most beautiful humans he's ever seen. his eyes are almost crystal clear in this lighting. a warmish brown, almost orange. his auburn brown hair is fully down, embellished with golden jewels and hair tinsel. a strange look.. but it works on him. and his skin..

before he can ogle anymore, the angelic mans voice tapers off, leaving the crowd disappointed. binghe looks up to see the other staring at him, eyes wide.

might continue this tmr or like fix it up a bit.. but yeah.. singer shen yuan save me.. please i need him so badly. also i love fics that have bingge and shen yuan bickering theyre always so good. i love them being silly in strange ways. part 2!!!

[greenflamedwriter]

I'm the protagonist, bitch!

What if SY transmigrated as Luo Binghe and had to go through the main trials and abuse under the scum villain Shen Qingqiu?

And in typical SY fashion, ends up deluding himself and no longer cares what Sqq is doing? Since Luo Binghe knows he's going to go into literal hell everything sqq does seem tame in comparison? He starts thinking "If being whipped is making me cry...how will I be when I lose a limb in the abyss!?"

Then he starts seeing this as inpromptu training, he gives SQQ the peerless cucumber roast of a lifetime JUST to get more punishment! He has to get stronger!

And of course in true Scum villain fashion, SQQ backs off and starts treating LBH as a disciple and just ignores him.

This is grossley unfair!

Shen Yuan AS Luo Binghe.

 So SY transmigrates as Luo Binghe and already doesnt feel comfortable as a grown ass man taking wives who were mostly Binghes age with the occasional milf thrown in there. So he decides fuck it, he’ll get stronger deal with he abyss when he gets to it and at first wanted revenge on SQQ then decided it was too much hassle. He just wanted to be left alone. But the scum villain keeps bothering him, and actually seems to like him- why? What changed!? The hell!?

-SY transmigrates as Luo Binghe.

Has the horror that as the protagonist his lufe is a living hell, continous tortourous chores, being whipped and beaten for the tiniest offense how will a millenial survive!

[Welcome Host you can you up! As the protagonist you are the workds child and no lasting harm will befall you-]

“Yeah but I’ll still be harmed.”

[An over powered protagnosit at the start if his journey is too unrealistic.

 Tasks for hosts are;

Create a harem.

Fall into the endless abyss.

Take revenge on Shen Qingqiu.

Merge the realms!]

“I dont want to do any if that!”

[System has heard users complaints and sees that Host will only do one scenario!]

Oh thank god

[System has taken the liberty of choosing the task- endless abyss arc!]

You fuck!

-SY stole a manual. If he wanted to survive the abyss he had to be stronger. Having an unstable core will do him no favours…

So far he was able to keep his head down but realised something. When he first transmigrated the first thing that happened he was beaten. And it hurt.

Then he was whipped and it hurt but…

Luo Binghe was going into the abyss- even with his demon blood awakened he would face a ton of horrors and so much pain his own arm ripped of.

“A-lou? You look pale,” His shiejie spoke placing a hand over his head.

 If he wanted to survive he would have to build up his pain tolerence…

Steadying his rabid heartbeat Luo Binghe smiled.

“This one is fine.”

He purposfully acts out, and tried not to cry- it was just intimidating okay! That he was being whipped while his Shizun supervised-

Did Shen Qjngqiu really have to sit there and watch the sadistic fuck!

Even so, he built himself up stronger.

He accidently proposed to Ming fan that he had no intention of seeing Ning Yinying that way as she was like a sister.

But seeing a man bully someone they percoeved as their little brother how would you react? If Ming Fan acted kind to Binghe he could also hang oht with Ning Yingying.

 “You can have one on one time with Ning Yingying, she’ll be happy that we’re getting along.”

“You just want me to help with your chores-“

“Of course not. This one will do extra and Ning Yingying likes to talk or gets bored easily you can stop and play with her instead.”

And just like that he matchmaked the two, and had all the wood chopping to himself.

It was frustrating coming from a modern eorld you’d think he knew hie to get stronger.

But that was all er-ge. He knew the difference between working out and only looking like a model but was weak and unfit. Meanwhile people who gained weight and looked bigger were often stronger.

Even so, Luo Binghe used the kitchens to his advantage while eating he would study and in his own time would train even dyring the night.

 And if he felt tired he would purposfully sleep in during his Shizuns lessons.

Extra points for snowing loudly.

Of course he rejoiced in the day he no longer felt pain on his back. He even told Shen Qingqiu himself that what point was the punishment if he now felt nothing?

So now he had to sit on pins, hanging off the mountain and not fall to his death because his arms got tired.

 Even so it’d make him stronger.

“Ah binghe can you take this to Peak Lord Shen?”

He blinked then stared at the food. 

And he suddenly had a wicked idea.

He may not want revenge kn his scumbag shizun, even though he deserved it. Lucky for him he was so lazy!

 But this would be the most sweetest revenge.

He decided to take the food up for Shen Qingqiu passing it to Mong Fan.

 “What are you doing with Shizuns food?”

“I was already in the kitchen, while the cooks told me to bring it.”

Ming Fan looked suspicious and Luo Binghe held the urge to roll his eyes.

“You can taste test it if you eant although, Shizun wont be pleased by the delay.”

To be fair, Shizun never ate. He never slept either. The only time he oerked was when he went doen the mountain. He sure had an addiction.

Luo Binghe almost said nothing then remembered he needed to get in trouble and punished!

 “Visiting the brothel, again, Shizun?”

The other gaped at his audacity, to be fair, Shen Qingqiu could kick him of the mountain, but after reassuring with the system that would never happen.

 Shen Qingqiu paused and only glanced back, cold eyes sneering down at Luo Binghe.

 Luo Binghe shivered, he sure was the scum villain alright, so scary!

Such a waste of good looks too.

 “Luo Binghe to the wood shed.”

He bowed, “Yes, Shizun.”

Unknwowing that to others he was practically going whth a slring in his step.

“Why do you rebel against your master so? Are you a glutton for punishment?”

Luo Binghe was forced to kneel before Shen Qingqiu, his legs bloodied and skin torn.

 The original goods would’ve broken Shen Qingqius legs for that.

But kneoing he may lose a leg in the endless abyss he was fine with it.

 “This disciple has nothing but respect for Shen Qjngqiu.”

Hah as if! He wished for nothing but Shen Qingqius castration!

 “This disciple is aware how…behind he is compared to everybody else and only wishes to be stronger. After being whipped to the point of no linger feeling pain?”

He missed the wide eyes of Shen Qjngqiu as he kept speaking.

 “This disciple knows many more trails are to come and this one has to be stronger to face them. So far the punishments have given this Binghe so much thatvhe can’t hope to ever repay. But as the years passed noticed less punishments…”

It was strange usually this was when Qjngqiu got worse.

“This Binghe never wanted to lose all that progress and so…to continue this disciple had to…escalate such things to get what I wanted.”

When he glanced up he blanched, he’d never seen Shen Qingqiu look so enraged!

Luo Binghe realised what he said then bowed, face red in shame.

“This disciple apologises! He should have spoken with Shizun first! And never went about his own training in such a way! This disciple was wrong!”

“Oh, so now you understand?”

Easy for you! Binghe was focused on survivng the abyss! Not your ego! 

 “It seems this Shizun was rewarding such behaviour. Are you truly a masochist?”

Shen Qingqiu used his foot to raise Luo Binghes chin from the floor!

Luo Binghe kept hos face impassive the only thing giving him away was a small twitch.

 He did not want that type of attention from his scumbag Shizun! God damn it!

“N-no Shizun this lowly one only wanted-“

The foot moved, and before Binghe could even relax, Shen Qingqiu rose as he stepped on his head pushing him intk the floor, Luo Binghe turned his nose just in time befkre it made contact.

He grunted, unable to move. Only riding it out until his scum Shizun got it out of his system. But this sucked.

 “What a degenrate beast, thinking he can take advantage of his Shizun. You don’t care aboht getting stronger only using that as an axcuse to get away with being disrespectful.”

Luo Binghe opened his mouth then closed it, to be fair…Luo Binghe did enjoy being able to clap back and roast Shen Qingqiu and even being beaten bloody and blue he thought-

Worth it!

Shen Qingqiu noticed then pushed his foot down harder.

Luo Binghe scowled.

 “With this type of punishment sometimes wonder werher you get off on this, Shizun.”

Shen Qingqiu paused, “What did you say?”

“Visiting all those brothels, and favouring Ning Yingying so, what if sineone where to walk in right now and see this, wouldn’t they jump to conclusions?”

Shen Qingqiu gripped his fan- ha a reaction! Even the original goods had never made him break his fan!

Luo Binghe wanted a record, lips twitching.

 “Whose the degenerate now? Pervert Shizun.” 

 Shen Qingqiu grabbed his hair yanking it back then slammed him into the floor.

 It was too quick to hurt.

All Luo Binghe knew was the blood pouring down his nose all over Shizuns lamenated flooring.

 “Clean yourself up. Then come back and clean this mess and if this stains this master will,”

Luo Binghe looked up at him tiredly, raisng an eyebrow.

 He’ll what? Beat him, burn him?

Kill him?

Ha! he can try he’s the motherfucking protagonist!

 Shen Qingqiu paused, eyes narrowing and Luo Binghe had to inwardly cackle.

Ha he did it! He broke Shen Qingqiu!

 Who knew his tried and true method of pissing of trolls online was apathy and not caring! Peerless cucumber for the win!

 Luo Binghe bowed, “if that’ll be all Shizun, this Binghe will return to clean his mess.”

That you made, he left unsaid.

After that things went…wrong.

Shen Qingqiu ignored him.

No one bullied him, no one hit him. Even when Luo Binghe poured tea all over Shen Qingqius head, it was scalding hot too!

He wasn’t punished.

No. No. No. no-

 The endless abyss was only a year away! 

And are you freaking kidding me! What wanting to get punished made Shen Qingqiu finally act like a decent Shizun!?

That asshole.

Whenever he saw him Luo Binghe couldn’t help but glare his scowl darkening and saw the smug bastards smirk.

 It was awful, Luo Binghe was so used to being on the attack and on guard.

So now he jumped at the slighest sound, thank god no one was there to see him flinch away from a bunny!

And his workload was depleted! He barely had any chores and suddenly realised he had so much free time!

Damn that scumbag!

 Its funny, the lriginal goods would give his left leg to be treated this way…as an actual disciple of Qing Jing Peak and yet…

 It felt wrong. Luo Binghe was completely thrown off it almost affected his appetite!

…

Wait.

Luo Binghe paused, the endless abyss was a matter of survival.

He was going to have to get used to not drinking water or finding food as well as fighting.

 Luo Binghe, who was going through the motions as he sparred with the rest of the disciples, going through the qing jing peak forms-

He never did before, too busy doing chores to never realise his manual was fake.

…he could’ve went to Mu Qingfang but knew his meridians were healthy and could easily be called a liar.

So he instead left two manuals on Shen Qingqius desk and wrote in the best caligraphy to ever grace the earth;

“I know this is a fake asshole.”

Of course Luo Binghes writing was awful in lessons! But now that Shen Qingqiu was no longer punishing him. Luo Binghe didnt hold back or doodle anymore.

Instead writing as many pages as he could neatly and was done befkre the glass.

The only irritation when Shen Qingqiu realised was a slight eye twitch.

 As well as other lessons, easily able to create the object they were supposed to paint before Shen Qingqiu could even critisice him Luo Binghe beat him to it.

 “The perspective is off and the bounce light is coming from the wrong direction. This disciple apologises for wasting paint.” He spoke in a bored tone.

The other disciples whose work was way worse felt themselves drop in shame.

If Luo Binghes was bad how in the fuck where they going to compete!?

 With all this three time, he decided to spend every moment in the library and study demonic beasts.

His memory was good and he of course knew every single weakness how cluld he not? The monsters were the only redemable thing in PIDW.

Poor Binghe he deserved better!

 He could train with Liu Qingge? Maybe say hey my Shizun is better than you and I can prove it fight me!

 Huh thats a plan. 

But the fact that Liu Qingge was alive was weird, after asking around it turns out Shang Qinghua had something to do with that…

 It was strange- but he didnt have time for that he had to focus! And being hungry was really making it hard.

Even so better doing this now in an enviroment where the wkrst thing that can happen is him collapsing.

Other than the abyss where he might end up dying.

 His head was splitting, he could barely sleep because of the pain.

  There had to be good spots in the abyss for water but airplane skipped it!

Oh no the porn was more improtant than survival! Dumb fuck!

Even so, he had to be lerfect in class, as well as remain consistent in his spars and able to face off against disciples.

And he was doing great! He wasnt hungry as much he could still fight okay the headaches he had grown used to so its fine!

 If he couldn’t fight hand to hand with a freakin disciple then how the fuck was he going to last one day in the abyss!

What Luo Binghe didnt know was he was the world child and the abyss wouldn’t be so bad in the sense it was supposed to make him stronger.

In the original story, Luo Binghe only clawed his way out for his hatred for Shen Qingqiu.

The system was very aware that this Luo Binghe…had no ambition.

 With nothing to keep him motivated, Luo Binghe may give up and so the system had no choice but to make the abyss easier.

Although technically it wasn’t unlike the original goods who was tossed in unprepared, terrible base, and ignorant.

This Luo Binghe has been training so of course it was going to be easier.

 But seriously host was damaging himself!

Luo Binghe, was panting harshly, his hands weak.

 He had to pace himself.

He knew his stomach would shrink if he stopped eating, he couldnt over indulge or he might hurt hinself or his stkmach might explode.

He had to get used to smaller bites.

 And learn how to ration food.

It got to the point where even Shen Qingqius food which used to smell heavenly just smelled.

It was still good. But he didnt want to eat it.

He knew logically his food tasted good, he just didnt care for it.

 When he delivered placing it down before his Shizun.

 Remebering the time Shizun found out his meals were cooked by Binghe! Was pricless he looked like he could cough up blood! 

The truth cane out when Binghes hands were injured, and of course he couldn’t train so he bawled telling Shizun not his hands how will he cook for him!?

 Thats when Shen Qjngqiu found out, and he had the most darkest mood ever.

The disciples of course took it out on Binghe, then he remembered oh yeah, Luo Binghe lost a limb in the abyss! Ergo more training!

So he was able to dodge and fight his way out with just his legs!

The fact that he was in a tree when Shen Qingqiu found him, with a ton of disciples tormening him he almkst laughed at Shen Qingqius face!

 Oh if only he still had a cellphone.

Ah if only his hands could work and take one too!

Instead Luo Binghe decided to paint Shen Qingqiu and it had to be his best work yet!

He had to admit it was the only healthy way to get the aggresion out his system. 

Art was therapytic no matter what Qingqiu said!

 And his woodshed was…covered.

On one hand he wanted to hide them, on the other?

He wanted someone to see and get pissed and punish him for it.

Now, Luo Binghe thought bored, he never gets punished. He was starting to miss it.

 doodling another Shen Qingqiu, his fault for being so handsome!

He drew Ming fan occasionally as well as the other male disciples.

Ying shijie always pouted that he never drew her as his french girl.

But he couldn’t!

Knowing the relationship the two had, anything could trigger a romance he did t want to risk it!

Men were safer!

He just said drawing ugly people was better to learn, Ning Yingying is too lretty unfortunatly!

She flushed then decided to say nothing else.

 Even so, Ming Fan was growing into his looks, he wasnt as gokd looking as Binghe but he no longer looked like an awful mini Scum.

 Luo Binghe was so tired he found his limbs shaking.

 His clothes were too big and he kept tripping on them.

And his head was pounding.

 One foot then-

He blinked his eyes open to see a ceiling, what?

 He tried to get up until a hand grabbed his head and lushed him back down.

Luo Binghe yelped, looking up to see Shen Qingqius dark face.

What? Was he upset Binghe was still alive? Well sorry oh great and bountiful Shizun this Binghe will try harder next time!

Shen Qingqius lips twitched into a sneer.

“Luo Shizi. Please don’t try to kill yourself no matter how much you want praise from someone.”

 Luo Binghe blanched, did he say that outloud?

“Now, might want me to explain why Luo Shizi is neglecting hinself?”

Mu Qingfang asked sktging before Luo Binghe.

It was…weird seeing two peaklords staring him down…

“Um, This Binghe wanted to be prepared in case…at any point found himself somewhere with no food or water and had to survive.”

He spoke, it was a very valid fear! Anything can happen to a cultivator!

“Why would you think that would happen to you- to take such an extreme risk such as this, to prevent it?”

 Luo Binghe’s eyes flickered to Shen Qingqiu for a split second but it was enough to make Shen Qingqiu snap.

“You really believe this Lord will do that to you?”

Luo Binghe stared at him and Shen Qingqiu looked more annoyed.

“Stop looking at me like that!”

Like what? Was he pulling a face?

(He was, he always gave Shen Qingqiu that look when he thought the kfher was being fumb)

“Luo Shizu has Shen Qingqiu done something to make you act this way, has he hurt you?”

“No.”

Both spoke at the same time, Shen Qingqiu looked surprised at Luo Binghe who stared straight ahead at Mu Qingfang.

 “This Binghe, has never been harmed by Shizun. In fact this one has been spoiled! This Binghe only wants to get stronger and prove that Shizun didnt make a mistake in making me his disciple!”

Mu Qingfang melted “Oh Shizi, you don't have to prove yourself. Afterall most of the peak knows that you are a gifted young student!”

Now Luo Binghe paused, sorry what? Since when!?

 “So theres no need to push yourself. You are a growing boy! And developing an eating disorder in this stage could damage your cultivation!”

Luo Binghe blinked, well…no it won't matter to a heavenly demon.

To a human sure, maybe but he was the protagonist he would be fine!

“Shen Qingqiu, you’ll have to watch him.”

Oh sweet! Shen Qingqiu wouldn’t give a shit! As long as Luo Binghe was careful and ate a little bit he wouldn’t collapse and be more careful he should be fine!

Both noticed Luo Binghe perk, Mu Qingfang felt something ease to know how much the disciples loved their Shizun.

Meanwhile Shen Qingqiu gave the other a narrowed eyed stare on why the thought of Shen Qingqiu watching him would being him delight?

As soon as they walked back to Qing Jing Peak, Luo Binghe turned in the direction of the wood shed to continue reading his books until he choked as the back of his collar was tugged yanking him back.

 “Where do you think you’re going?”

Shen Qingqiu asked, lightly fanning his face while holding Binghe by the scruff like a misbehaving dog.

 “My…room?”

Shen Qingqiu’s eyes twitched.

“You really believe this lord is going to leave you unsupervised?”

Luo Binghe gave him that look again.

 And Shen Qingqiu’s first impulse was to slap him.

 He held back, knowing his wayward disciple probably enjoyed that!

“Since this Shizun has been so neglectful of his poor student,” 

Luo Binghe twitched, tensing up waiting for the guillotine.

What was his Shizun up to?

 “This Lord will have to personally take care of you hinself.”

Luo Binghe blinked then froze.

Shit.

Shit!

He had no idea this could happen- but to be fair he thought his Shizun would bite off his own tongue rather than pretend to be caring for someone like Binghe!

 “From now on you will be living with me in the side room at the bamboo house.”

If Shen Qingqiu wasn’t holding him Luo Binghe would’ve fell on his ass.

 What?

“Come on, what meagee things did you need at your room that you were in a hurry to get?”

Luo Bknghe grit his teeth and had to turn stiffly as he walked towards the wood shed and entered.

Shen Qingqiu stayed at the doorway not entering, and instead watching Luo Binghe gather his books and manual.

 He checked the contents making sure it wasn't another fake one the shoved it in a quirken pouch.

 He wasn't stupid or had an eating disorder for christ's sake!

 He just could be reliant on constant fokd only to die of something silly like starvation or hunger day 3 in the abyss!

 And Shen Qingqiu did not even comment on the wood shed being his room other than the dorms.

The bastard.

 “I’m ready, Shizun.”

Instead Shen Qingqiu didn't move, baring his exit while he stood on the doorway.

“Aren’t you forgetting something?”

 His eyes flickered to the back wall.

…that was full of his paintings and charcoal sketches of Shen Qingqiu and…others.

Okay sure after fighting Liu Qingge he had to draw him too!

 Luo Binghe didn't move.

“The disciples can use it as tinder for the fire if needed. So why move them?”

 Luo Binghe tilted his head, “And Shizun does not expect this disciple to live in the side room for the next foreseeable future this Binghe will return back to the woodshed in no time so why move them?” He asked, tilting his head to the side.

Shen Qingqku snapped his fan shut and turned with a flourish of his robes.

How unfair, Binghe was still in his disciple era and can't do that yet.

 With each step he followed Shen Qingqiu to his new home, mulish expression on his face.

  The other disciples scowled darkly at him in envy.

Afterall its the first time any one other than the head disciple had been so close to the peak lord.

 Luo Binghe went straight to the side room and started tidying.

 He’ll have to sort out the linen sheets and wash them, dust, then wipe the floor, open the window for ventilation-

 He ended up washing the sheets outside and once they were dry with a tailsman he brought then back then paused to see his room was done.

Somebody had already cleaned and wiped down the floor.

The window was open allowing a nice cool breeze in the warn room.

“Ming Fan had finished your room. All you have to do is put your things away. You are under direct orders from Mu Qingfang not to over exert yourself.”

Luo Binghe scowled “Yes, Shizun.” 

It was a nightmare.

His Shizun would demand lunch and watch Luo Binghe eat then would make sure he didn't go to the bathroom to throw it up-

Like he would!

 Shen Qjngqiu even told him to stop eating when he seemed to realise it was too much for Binghes recovering stomach before even he knew.

 Even so he was monitored, made sure he slept and didn't read well into the night.

When Shen Qingqiu learned this he ended up tying Binghe in immortal binding cables and laying him in bed.

 Shen Qjngqiu was more aggrieved to learn that's why he was sleeping through his lessons.

 He couldn’t train as much, and usually Luo Binghe would act cool and aloof.

 But this was killing him.

Ming Fan was taking some sick delight out of this he knew it.

 And Luo Binghe’s temper was growing short, the immortal alliance was coming up soon and with the way this was going he was not going to survive.

 [Host! In order to complete the endless abyss arc- user has to prove he can enter the immortal alliance conference or he may be dropped from the list!]

…what?

“I- I can skil the abyss?”

[Luo Binghe must enter the abyss. Failure to do so Hkst will be ejected from his body and restored to the original one]

Luo Binghe blinked, placing a hand over his chest at the thought.

 He had to get better or he wont jump to his possible death?

What was the point?

 Luo Binghe clutched his arms, and made himself smaller in the room.

Okay. Okay he can deal with this.

The next morning, Luo Binghe felt as if he was run over by a truck.

 His emotions were all over the place… probably from his fucked up diet. 

 He glanced up at Shen Qingqiu who ate with poise.

Mu Qingfang told him it was better if Binghe ate with someone. And that someone had to be his scumbag shizun.

He really didn't understand him…you'd think he’d encourage this type of behaviour? 

 “Stop staring and eat your food, mongrel.”

What a dick.

Luo Binghe was pushing his food around and forced himself to take a bite.

“Shizun?”

“What.”

Luo Binghe stared down at his food.

“If this disciple regulated his eating habits only to then fall back into the same habits later down in the future- what would happen?”

“You would die.”

Shit-fuck!

“So this disciple should stop eating now instead-“

He was hot with a fan.

It was less painful that anything Shen Qingqiu has done to him before. It just surprised him.

 “Why prepare for something that may never happen? Why not just build your own grave then lie in it and be done with it? Theres no point wasting this masters time by making you a disciple just to watch you throw it away. You can’t be trusted, that is no longer your body. It’s mine, not one scratch, not one bruise and not one bone protruding without my say so.”

Luo Binghe scowled down at his food.

So now he cares? 

 “This one can still function as a disciple discreetly if you're worried about what others think. Contrary to popular belief I don't want to die.”

Shen Qingqiu looked unimpressed,

“Then what do you call this? Do you miss those punishments so much you would reduce yourself to self harm?”

Luo Binghe blinked, “Self harm? This is only to get stronger, now this Binghe can function without headaches after skipping meals compared to before-“

“Stop.” Shen Qingqiu really looked irritated.

“You are a cultivator, if you don't want to eat work on your core instead, so you have inedia.”

He would but Meng Mo told him if he pushes his core anymore his demonic cultivation will throw it out of balance. So far he’s been working on building that up. 

 By the systems calculations he wouldn’t be able to unlock that ability for the abyss.

To make it more angsty for the readers.

For fucks sake.

So now he was back at square one. Couldn’t train like before and had to go back to the same amount of chores as the others. Finishing quicker but befkre he could even help Shen Qingqiu would aopear like his fucking shadow and punish the ones Luo Binghe helped.

Shen Qingqiu realised he was fine with punishments but when others got hurt on his account Luo Binghe would back off!

Why!?

The original Luo Binghe would be ecstatjc to have such a kind and caring Shizun! But he had to wonder what the fuck changed!?

 Luo Binghe in PIDW did everything to get Shizuns approval but was kicked into the abyss for it! He was punished for breathing!

Now Luo Binghe would give anything to chop wood till his fingers bled or feel the burn of the whip on his back!

And it wasn’t weird he was just under stimulated! 

 He needed to do something!

So he ended up in the kitchen aggressively cooking deserts.

 And it smelled nice.

He already over cooked a ton to feed the entire peak!

He sighed after pulling out his last batch.

 May as well give them out, wouldn’t want to waste food.

“Strange how you can cook such delicious foods yet treat them so callously.”

Luo Binghe flinched, fuck me!

He didn't even hear the devil come in!

Luo Binghe glared, another thing he would’ve been punished for, and yet Shen Qingqiu only seemed amused by it.

…was his Shizun bipolar or what!?

 Luo Binghe glanced away.

“This disciple was only stress baking, I bought the ingredients myself so it's not wasting Qing Jing Peaks resources.”

 Shen Qingqiu picked up one of the steam pead flour cakes he just baked and tasted it.

 Luo Binghe waited for the verdict.

 He hoped Shen Qingqiu wasn’t going to make him eat all this food he may actually develop an ED if he did.

“Eat this.”

Luo Binghe fucking called it.

Before he could even reach for one, Shen Qingqiu pushed the food towards his mouth, Luo Binghe had to eat otherwise it would make a mess.

 Suddenly flavour exploded on his tongue.

It tasted so good, of course it was the protagonist cooking!

 He slowly chewed  then swallowed it.

 “How did it taste?”

“Good.”

What was Shen Qingqiu getting at?

“So what is the problem,”

Luo Binghe tilted his head. Was it bothering him that much that Binghe refused food?

 “Its not the taste of the food. Its the fear that I’ll grow so dependent on it and find that I suddenly cant have it.”

“But getting stronger and studying beasts, what's the point in that if you run your body into the ground.”

Luo Binghe had enough, throwing the tray of food to the side.

“Why do you suddenly care!? You whipped me because I talked back but you dont do that now- I starved in that wood shed you never cared, my back was bloody my hands mangled you did not care. So why start now? You may be fine with acting like the kind Shizun. The great Xiu ya Peak Lord Shen, but excuse me for not buying it. For waiting for the other shoe to drop. 

 So what will it be next? After this would it be sleeping? Is that going to be our new thing once this is done? How many mkre ways do you need to torture me.”

“You torture yourself. I did nothing.”

Yet.

But he will throw Luo Binghe of a cliff into the abyss to kill him.

 “You hurt yourself then blame me. You enjoyed those punishments as training, so I stopped realising it was teaching you the wrong lesson. You’re different from other disciples, stupid. To think this is how any respectable cultivator would train-“

“I’m not a cultivator.” Luo Binghe spoke tiredly, looking at Shen Qingqiu with a bored expression on his face.

 It riled Shen Qingqiu up.

“This one was an unwanted disciple, a waste. All because Ning Shiejie wanted a shidi and you wanted to win one over Liu Qingge. Because he wanted me first.”

 Shen Qingqius eyes widened and Luo Binghe looked down.

“You never wanted this disciple, and this Binghe is fine with that. But after giving me a fake cultivation manual, making me fight elder hammer with posion that could kill me. How can you blame this one for flinching waiting for a third blow?”

Shen Qingqiu looked shocked that Luo Binghe even knew that much.

He walked past, ignoring the food plans of distributing it around the peak forgotten.

 Luo Binghe sat before Shen Qingqiu. Forgetting that he had to eat with the devil.

The only thing that gets Luo Binghe through the day is karma.

Everytime something unfortunate happens to Shen Qingqiu (who had such unfortunate luck) 

 He would bare witness to it.

Being bested in a duel by Qi Qingqi. He ended up cheering her on the loudest.

 Seeing Shen Qingqiu try to practise sword fighting and making a huge hole in qing jing peak.

He acted like he did it on purpose but Luk Bknghe was fascinated by his tells and knew the man was embarrassed.

Dropping a tea kettle on his foot he even hopped up and down with a yelp.

That was the best one!

Thoughts like that got him through.

He ate mindlessly not tasting anything. And had to stop when his stomach ached. 

“Keep eating.”

Luo Binghe paused, “What?”

“Keep eating. After all this Shizun is cruel and would force poor Binghe to starve so keep eating.”

What a petty bitch.

 Luo Binghe did staring right at Shen Qingqiu and kept eating. Until his bowl was finished.

His stomach was killing him.

But he ignored it.

 Then he began to swallow more, saliva pooling in his mouth, and-

Luo Binghes eyes widened, he dropped his bowl into the floor and lunged for the bathroom, even Shen Qingqiu flinched at the breakneck speed then grimaced when he heard Luo Binghe throw up.

 Luo Binghe didnt eat the next day.

And Shen Qingqiu was begging to lose his temper.

“If you don’t eat properlly you’re not going to the immortal alliance conference!”

God dammit!

 Luo Binghe had to admit defeat.

He had half a year left, it would make it more difficult but he had no choice.

 He started slow, eating fruits out in the open after training where everyone would see.

Starting off small.

 Sharing snacks and eating them himself, and when it came to big meals, would still leave food left but not as much as before.

Its fine, when he’s in the abyss he knows what to expect.

 He faces monsters in the beginning, has to keep moving into the centre where he finally finds some springs for water, but no food. Maybe he can prepare a quirken pouch to take supplies.

After all what if water is stored in things, like plants, or trees or even rocks!

It can happen!

 If he has tools to store water, and food and make it last then thats eight out of ten problems.

 Then theres madam meiyans adventures with the succubus clan…hmm, he really wants to skip it.

Losing his first time in an abyss is not the best place, but he would need new clothes…

He had no idea while he was recovering eating, passing Mu Qingfangs bill of health.

 Everyone even peaklords praised Shen Qingqiu for being there for his disciple and helping him through somethimg so trying.

It pissed him off.

No one gave a shut ablut his eating habits, he sweats mu Qingfangs care for his own disciple than his fellow maritial sibling.

 And Shen Qingqiu knew Luo Binghe.

That look in his face when he was alone, the anxiety, and panic before settling down.

 It was refreshing. Before Luo Binghe would always show that fake smile and act friendly but underneath Shen Qjngqku knew something was wrong with the kid.

The relief when he finally showed his true colours and stopped pretending.

If its one thing, Shen Qingqiu hates its liars.

 But no, Luo Binghe may be showing signs he was okay maybe he really is over this bad habit.

 But now its when a new habit appears.

He mentioned sleeping so now Shen Qingqiu is more vigilant making sure he goes to bed on time and stops studying those demon books.

Why is Binghe even writing notes on how to defeat a monty python rhino? 

 He’s too young to be fighting that- he was given a list on what to fight in the alliance why was he studying something else!?

“Maybe he’s trying to copy you?”

Shen Qingqiu paused, lowering the tea cup from his lips.

“Excuse me?”

Mu Qingfang only looked at him cooly.

 “Its not a secret that Shen Qingqiu doesnt sleep, is a bright young man but is weak in his cultivation, and is too skinny.”

Shen Qingqiu scowled. “Thats ludicrous and untrue. He’s never went to a brothel.”

So there!

“Not yet, maybe it’ll happen in time.”

“Why would Binghe copy me?”

“Most do, to someone they respect, or idolise. Maybe wanted to understand you better.”

No. Mu Qingfang is definitely wrong at this.

“Binghe is making his own mistakes. He’s not following mine.”

Mu Qingfang hummed, “Its only a theory, unless he starts showing…signs. Maybe you might have to have the talk.”

Shen Qingqku stared then his eyes narrowed “Certainly not. That's the hallmasters job!” 

“Maybe there's a lot of things he doesn't know-“

“He had a mother. She would’ve told him.”

…

“What?”

As Luo Binghe came back ho- the bamboo house he wanted to collapse onto his bed.

 He wanted to skip dinner so bad but he had to eat now.

Like a respectful adult ugh! 

 “Binghe!”

“I have moon cakes! I’m eating moon cakes from Ning Yingying!”

He snapped back, he just got into bed! Now he had to stomp because Shizun would want him face to face.

The typical parent yelling for their kid then not answering when they respond.

 “Not that, impertinent brat. Sit.”

Luo Binghe sat. What? What could his bipolar Shizun want now?

 “If you visit brothels or make nong yingying pregnant I will castrate you,”

Whoa- what!?

Luo Binghe blinked “Shizun, this disciple must have hit his head at sparring today and didnt hear you right. Can you please repeat that?”

What the fuck?

Shen QingQiu sneered down at him.

 “Someone brought to my attention that you like to copy me.”

Luo Binghe started looking around and Shen Qingqiu scowled.

“What are you doing.”

“Looking for my fan. But I can’t seem to find it.”

As well as tge stick up my ass but thats not there either so clearly he’s not copying!

“Being a recluse, hiding away from others and assuming the worst of others and your strange relationship with food then you mentioned sleeping habits….”

Luo Binghe glanced back up, surprised.

 Even Shen Qingqiu…?

Luo Binghe glanced back down then realised where Shen Qingqiu was going with this-

“I don't need the talk!” He yelped face red. He did not-

He stood up walking away.

 “I’m not copying you- I’m not going to end up in a brothel with tons of women-!”

Although original Binghe would’ve-

That wasnt him!

He wasnt interested in a harem! Maybe find some girl settle down study beasts get a bet one.

Oh how cool would that be?

The protagonist with a giant fucking wolf as his companion?

Yeah a big heckin chihuahua. 

 Luo Binghe had to start cooking something or he was going to go nuts.

 …Shen Qingqiubeas seriously starting ti scare him.

When his diet was back to normal, his workout began again. And now he was studying arrays.

 Fucking stupid, he was.

Why didn't he think of this before? Keeping food hot or frozen to last longer.

And even have inside pockets so he wint lose his shit willy nilly!

He soent all his tike studying, and sewing and-

Bang!

Most of it exploded in his face.

“Shizun!”

“Don’t tell Shizun!”

It was an accident! It wasn’t on purpose!

But Nong Yingying snitched and now he had to go over sewing techniques and arrary work with the hallmaster again.

 And when they saw what he was trying to make they laughed. Claiming it was impossible.

Luo Binghe gree mullish, fuck you he’s the protagonist he can fucking do it!

 After hiding away from prying eyed and working on smaller fabrics was able to make a heating AND freezing charm.

He experimented with cold foods first to see if they stayed frozen in the pouch then crowed with delight that it worked!

Now to make it bigger!

 And just like that he was able to store large amounts of food in his pouch oldest at the friend newest at the back sk nothing got too spoiled.

 He was so giddy.

After making tons of pouches and even showing them off and how they worked and why they existed.

Shen Qingqiu cleared his throat.

 “Write your progress into a report. We’ll place your findings in the library with the rest.”

Huh…huh!?

“And Binghe.”

Luo Binghe stood at attention as Shen Qingqiu gazed down at him.

“You are approved to go to the immortal alliance. Do not disappoint me.”

 What oh- oh fuck YES!

-he wanted to ditch these disciples why join kf they’re going to struggle!?

Then the demons arrive! About time! Ah these were mich better to fight than the easy ones!

Even the spiders were easy!

 “Everyone! There is a snow flower that is a deterent to demons! Up this way!”

Once they were safe did Luo Binghe sigh with relief.

 At least now, its all on him.

“I’ll go find help!”

He left the disciples before they could utter a word.

Now alone all he had to do was wander aimlessly until the abyss opened.

 He was nervous, like exams, dentist, and blood tests all into one.

 He just wanted it over with. As soon as he was in the abyss the better.

 “Binghe.”

“Fu- Shizun!?” He nearly died- what the hell? 

Oh yeah, Shizun was supposed to toss him in.

 “What is Shizun doing here?”

Shen Qingqiu scowled, “Rescuing disciples such as yourself. Come on.”

Mobei-jun comes in, and Luo Binghe feels his hands shaking as he watched as Shang Qinghua was hit into a tree.

 This was wrong.

Shen Qingqiu was actually fighting a demon and telling Binghe to run?

“Hmm, what a weak cultivator.”

Shen Qingqiu growled, “You demonic spawn- this Peak Lord is the Xiu ya sword! And you will fall by my blade!”

Shizun was hurt.

Shen Qingqiu evaded the most of the ice crystals, but was pinned to a tree by a viscious one.

Shen Qingqiu may die.

Luo Binghe moved, not even aware just lunging for the ice demon with a yell, swiping his sword down.

 He’d forgotten all of his training, only using his bare hands as Mobei-jun looked at him with interest.

“Binghe- run stupid boy!”

Luo Binghe wasn’t paying attention, instead he evaded even getting slammed into the ground, almost breaking his arm he ignored it, until Mobei-jun grabbed his head.

“Hmm, human but not.”

Wait- the monty python…

Luo Binghes eyes widened as a clawed hand reached towards his face, he screamed at the pure agony in his forehead as he was dropped to the floor. 

 He clutched his skull feeling the mark of sin burn into his forehead his whole body becoming liquid fire when his demonic core burned through his meridians along side his spirtual veins.

 Luo Binghe panted, fuck he felt awful.

Mobei-jun replaced the rhino… why was it different?

“Beast.”

Luo Binghe looked up, eyes drooped and out of it. Until a sword touched his neck.

Luo Binghe stiffened, remembering where he was and what he was supposed to do.

“Shizun? Want to tell me what your doing?”

“Who are you calling Shizun, demon mutt?”

Ah back to pet names huh? Luo Binghe hummed, “This disciple is just as surprised as you.”

He glanced to the side and saw Zheng Lang destroyed.

 “Shizun, can you do this one a favour?”

“No.”

Luo Binghe shifted back, and stood up, Shen Qingqiu held his sword high, green eyes almost black with the dark scowl on his face.

 Luo Binghe took another step back, then another.

  His eyes remained on his sword, he really…wanted to take the sword with him…having a sword would be easier in the abyss now he can’t.

He missed the wide eyes look of his Shizun, missed the panic as Binghe took another step back.

 “Shizun, can you fix my sword? Say…Luo Binghe died…a human.”

Shen Qingqkus eyes widened, his sword faltering, as Luo Binghe took another step back.

 Then felt the ledge under his foot and paused.

 “This one has always trained for this…You were never a good Shizun, but this past year…” Luo Binghe turned to look down at the abyss, his chest suddenly tightening, it was terrifying, he was scared. Who wouldn’t be?

 He was procrastinating at this point, the timer ticking down.

 “I think I might miss you. Shen Qingqiu.” Luo Binghe smiled, showing all his teeth no different to how he looked before he did something to piss Shen Qingqiu off.

Then he fell, falling back into the abyss, eyes squeezed tight breathing heavily to hold in his scream.

 The rift shut with a snap.

Leaving Shen Qingqiu with his hand held out, eyes wide in shock.

 He fell to his knees, wounded, in pain…and numb.

All this time he wanted to do away with that brat, he dreamed off it-

Now?

“Shen Qingqiu!”

“Shen-Shidi!”

His eyes slid over to the broken sword…he moved and began to pick up the pieces.

 He may as well honour that brat. And do this one thing for him.

____________

Luo Binghe almost collapsed against the broken stairway, almost there.

 He lost track of time of how long he was in the abyss. He barely had time to think or feel, just respond to each attack and survive.

The only reprieve was when he found a little oasis when the system would pipe up.

 And tell him hints with b-points that he earned in the development arc Disciple days.

Luo Binghe almost slumped with relief, food and water was scarce, it was worse than Qing Jing Peak, he knew if he woke up he would be halfway down a beasts mouth.

 -gets a dog

-loses a dog

System makes him go to madam meiyan.

“You upled the difficulty on purpose!?”

[stop doing side quests and go to madam meiyan! You need new clothes and then you can get Xin Mo!]

Luo Binghe paused, Xin Mo?

“Why didn’t you say so?”

Like an autistic stuck in a closet and forgotten about, Luo Binghe was actually getting used to the abyss.

 But after the loss of Pear…

Yeah, he wanted to call him mini peerless cucumber but that was a mouthful in the abyss. But he wanted it affiliated wkth fruit and thought Pear was a good name.

 When Pear was ripped to shreds in front of him, Binghe drove off any cute baby animal that got too close.

He thought that as the protagonist- he really wanted to go home with lear, watch him get bigger and be an intimadating badass!

 The system knew he was dodging basic Luo Binghe plots and waa dojng his own thing so to give him angst it decided to make him break down.

Losing his pet, his one stability, his confirt in this wasteland. Shen Qingqiu never betrayed him, so he had to accept loss in one way or another.

It just sucked!

And so after finally trudging up to Madam Meiyan, reluctently, then felt bad because she was nice.

He told her he didnt want anything to happen in the abyss, not until he was safe.

 She patged his hand yet still helped him get new clothes.

She didnt act like the femme fatale side fling of Luo Binghe. She acted like a caring older sister.

He slumped in gratitude, and finally adorned the black and red robes.

He checked himsekf oht in the mirror lerking up. 

Now that is a protagonist!

 Complete lady killer! But not in this world!

Luo Binghe, as a reader, always thought if at any point he would have to marry?

It’d be Liu mingyan.

She was smart, strong and cool. Best girl.

 Even so Madam Meiyan was so kind, it almost made Luo Binghe cry.

 Even so, he couldn’t stay in the den long, thats just inviting disaster.

 He began his journey again, rationing his food and thankful that other than the beggining, at least food was no loner scarce and he could eat and not have to worry.

 [That could also be inedia]

Or that too!

Even so, the monsters had to get stronger thats how you level up!

And Luo Binghe wasted no time grinding he wasnt a newb!

He was going to keep fighti bf every single demon he could lay his on to get stronger.

 [Host is procastinating to avoid Xin Mo]

He was not!

…maybe- even so he needed duel cultivation to deal with it.

And he didnt want to deal with it.

So when he finally made it up the stairwell, leaning heavily on the wall and leaving blood and ichor on the pale stone,

He saw Xin Mo in tge centre of the room.

 Before he was scared, now he had to get over it.

 He beat his training, he was literally having a vacation in the abyss, after Xin Mo magbe that will no linger be a problem.

He approached extending his hand and grasped the handle.

Quiet.

Then a sudden flood of screams, intense rage and anger swarmed into him.

He grimaced falling to his knees, breathing his throat aching when he realised he was screaming too.

[Host! Soend b-points to temper Xin Mo?]

Yes yes a hundred times yes!

The screams didnt stop, but dulled down to a feint baackgfound noise.

God how did Luo Binghe deal with this.

He raised his arm and sliced downwards into an arc and a portal opened up.

Luo Binghe gazed at it like the first sunset honest delight on his face.

He didnt think it would work the first time!

 As he stepped through the portal still open he glanced at the sword and three it back into the portal.

“Yeet.”

Instead it slung back missing his neck to slam into the tree behind him.

The portal closed.

[Host and Xin Mo are bonded for life. Only destrkying Xin Mo can release its hold.]

Luo Binghe brushed a hand over his face, really?

At least that was his new goal. Destroy Xin Mo.

The system even had the nerve to make that as a bullet point on his list lf tasks.

[What else will host do now that he’s free?]

Well other than the abyss, he didnt have to do the other plot points.

 He didnt have to return to cang Qiong. Or even go to Huan Hua.

 He coukd just wander PIDW to his hearts content and fight monsters, rescue damsels, without marrying them.

It sounds like a dream-

[Warning! Character arrival! Task: defeat important character!]

Mobei-jun appeared even seeming surprised to see Luo Binghe.

What? Why? Why!?

[To fix plot holes ;)]

You tricked me!

Luo Binghe leaped back, evading Mobei-Jun attack- it was weird.

How weaker Mobei-Jun was.

He could kill him, just use Xin Mo and sate it for now…but Mobei-Jun was a loyal fighter…

And he wont be able to spar with Liu-Shishu again. As Luo Binghe kept dodging, considering expression on his face, he was unaware it kept pissing off Mobei-Jun.

“Take this seriously!”

Oh? Ah he was being rude. Compared to when he was a child, he was easily slammed into the ground.

Luo Binghes claws extended as he grabbed Mobei-Jun by the throat and slammed him into the ground.

Mobei-Jun grunted eyes wide to see Luo Binghe straddling on top of him heavenly sigil glowing with red demonic eyes looking down at Mobei-Jun like he was an interesting bug he decided to play with knstead of squish into the dirt beneith his biot.

“Do you lield and swear your loyalty to me, or should this one kill you know and save myself ghe trouble?”

Mobei-Jun swallowed eyes bright.

“This one will follow you, Junshang.”

[Congragulations! Luo Binghe is now a lord! Next task- defeat the saintess Sha Hualing to claim title as demon emporoer!]

Luo Binghe stood up leaving Mobei-Jun on the ground, onlivious to the ice kings new sexual awakening-  

And stared at the system.

“Are you telling me that I HAVE to do those plots?”

[Yes! Become a demon emporer! And also be adopted into Huan Hua! Investigate plot points! Revenge on Shen Qingqiu is optional!]

Oh?

[Merging the realms is also optional!]

Hmm.

Even so, the reason Luo Binghe merged the realms was because of paper work.

 He’ll need people, unlike the og Binghe who couldn’t trust anyone and had to hold his empire himself but also going on adventures and picking up flowers every five minutes? Garunteed his rule wouldn’t be great especially since Mobei-Jun kills his spy who also HAPPENED to be tge advisor.

 “Mobei-Jun.” He glanced over, time to start planning.

 “Not to be a pain, but this Binghe is tired. Can you be accomidating and give me a room? Prefferbly in your northern palace of course.”

Mobei-Jun looked stiff then nodded with a small bow.

“Of course Junshang.”

He opened up a portal and and was soon making his way to his new home.

Luo Binghe never liked the cold, in his former life or this one.

 But he’ll have to deal.

____

First order of buisness after dealing wkth Mobei-Juns unruly court.

 Linguang-Jun had to go.

Any infatuation Mobei-Jun had fizzled. Luo Binghe only sneered down at the blood smear of what was left of his uncle and said.

“Just some cannon fodder who didnt add to the plot, bound to backstab for further gain when given the chance.”

He had a point but still.

Then he demaded to see Shang Qinghua.

“Relax, Mobei. This lord only wants to reunite with his precious Shang-Shishu.”

Mobei-Jun kelt giving excuses, making Shamg Qinghua overworked on purpose so he would never meet their ecentric demon Lord.

Luo Binghe must have grown tired breaking Mobei-Juns hand and warning him that he was being polite but now enough was enough.

The three kf them sat at a table together, Luo Binghe spread like king, relaxed. A contrast to both Qinghua and Mobei-Jun who sat stiffly.

“So your the spy who ruined the immortal alliance and backstabbed Cang Qiong to align with demons! Never knew you had it in you Shishu!”

Shang Qinghua looked like he was going to vomit.

 Hmm, the man was always…different.

More cold. And evil.

This guy was a gerbil.

“Hmm, first order of buisness. Mobei-Jun.” Luo Binghe looked up glaring at him.

“No killing Shang Qinghua. No matter what, even if he betrays yourself or this Lord being him to me to punish, understood?”

That seemed to surprise both.

“J-Junshang? Thank you for the order on my behalf, but ks there any reaoson…to…”

Shang Qinghua lost his vouce the more Luo Binghe stared at him.

What? Whys he so scared for- he doesnt know me yet or how string I am-

[Host has a resting scary face]

That was just cruel.

“This lord…likes paperwork.” Luo Binghe spoke aving his sleeves and moving forward to pour tea.

 “Its calming, helps keep my thoughts organised. Excessive paper work, redundent paper work, incompetant paperwork is something I’d rather not do. If this lord plans on conquering the south or even plans on dessimating Huan Hua-“

Here Shang Qinghua twitched.

Other times he would’ve missed it.

But in the abyss any movement reflects so much.

“Havkng a base in the human realm and demon realm garuntess my hands will be full. Shang Qinghua is managing the northern realm as well as Cang qiong. Someone that competant will lighten the load.”

After making the tea he sliced his hand calmly watching the blood pour into the cup.

 He saw from the corner of his eye, Shang Qinghua breath hitched, his face pale.

“Here Shishu, drink. Swear your loyalty to this demon lord.”

He wondered why Luo Binghe never did this to his close subordinates in the first place.

Make sure he’d never get betrayed and reward people under his emply with healing beneifts.

Join Luo Binghe we have health care!

“Hmm, why so hesitent Shang-Shishu. You wont bettay this lord so what worry is there?”

Shang Qimghua gulped then grabbed the cup chugging it down.

Luo Binghe laced his fingers together as he gazed at Qinghua.

“Hmm? Does Shang Qinghua know something?”

Shang Qinghua was back to his pale trembling self.

 “N-no Junshang. This Qinghua knows nothing.”

…he’s lying.

Luo Binghe dropped the playful act and tilted his head.

Shang Qinghua immedietly started sweating buckets.

“Do you like reading Shang Qinghua?”

The other nodded “Y-yeah?”

Hmm.

“Theres a book this lord can’t stand, the worst literay piece ever known to man. I regret laying my eyes on such drivel. Its called Proud Immortal Demon way, has Shang Qinghua heard of it?”

It was instant, Shamg Qinghua almlst stopped breathing.

“Yes.”

Luo Binghe felt himself relax, and in turn Shang Qinghua looked like his strings were snapped.

Luo Binghe almost felt nad for him.

“Yes I didnt like that story, so I decided to change a few things in it.”

Shang Qinghua began to oerk.

And in turn Mobei-Jun began to glower-

Itvwas strange woth how a fee words he had Qinghua relaxing and leaning in closer.

 Mobei-Jun would’ve guessed it was the blood but he felt no different.

…or maybe…

No. He felt no different.

Of course when Shang Qinghua came running to him screaming he of course hid him out the way until it was junshang trucking towards them.

“Airplane!”

“Ah dont kill me!”

Mobei-Jun stood stiff “Mobei-Jun get out kf my way.”

“No killing Qinghua. Your order.”

Luo Binghe blinked then scowled at Qinghua who stuck his tongue out at him.

The killing intent was string even Mobei-Jun almlst buckled from it.

Luo Binghe scowled “Fine!”

“If I wanted to kill you, I would’ve used my blood parasites dipshkt.”

“Oh yeah.”

“Hmm hmm.”

“Your inside me-“

“What? Ew why are you like this!?”

A/n:

Shen Yuan: Luo Binghe was influenced by Xin Mo it wasnt his fault.

Shen Yuan as Luo Binghe with Xin Mo: does nothing inappropriote and is a distinguished gentlemen.

-Shen Qingqiu trial

Luo Binghe wanted nothing to do with the scumbag and just let the consequences of his actions continue their course.

 As Luo Binghe was investigating the origins if his parents (since the system was adament ablut it for some reason) he didnt think his inlut mattered.

 But then  it was his reputation that came into it.

 He realised he should have….maybe…thought this through.

 “Is it true that Shen Qingqiu abused his disciples?”

 If it was one thing, Luo Binghe wanted to be fair. Shen Qingqiu never abused him, but he may have murdered Qui Haitangs brother.

But if Luo Binghe expressed nothing was wrong then the whole cultivation world will see him as a backstabbing disciple!

 Luo Binghe was also…curious, why the original goods never invaded both dreams to see what really happened. Verify the evidence so to say.

 “This Binghe has his own personal reasons to remain here at Huan Hua.”

Not to mention, Shen Qingqiu could blackmail him as being a heavenly demon.

 Luo Binghe already felt like he could t relax and retire not with this threat looming at him.

“And Shen Qingqiu has never abused me.”

Here he saw Shen Qingqius twitch, and ignored it.

 “But his past with Qui Haitang is something I am unfamiliar with.” He could tell the tide was changing against him.

 To stand aside while his Shizun was being condemned? How unfilial.

“And so this Binghe has decided to personally investigate this case as a neutral party.”

Qui Haitang looked his way-

“What!? So you can hide evidence and help your scumbag Shizun!?” She yelled and Luo Binghe spoke.

“On the contrary, a rogue cultivator claiming a Peak Lord had murdered her entire family with only servants to survive? Where are such servants why is there not more witnessed to confirm this case? This could just as easily paint you Miss Haitang in a poor light with just the right defense.”

Luo Binghe gave her his best charming look, hoping to give off friendly big brother vibes to aplease her.

“Dont worry Miss Haitang. This Binghe will only uncover the truth on what happened that night and help you find peace.”

[Congragulations! +50 Charisma points for Miss Haitang! Possible love arc begin-]

No no no- it wasnt- no! Cancel love arc CANCEL!

-uses his dreams and finds out the truth from both.

Speaks to Shen Qingqiu in the water prison.

Hunts down servants. Who are scarred and reveal the abuse of Qui Jianlou and his crimes. How they speak kindly lf Shen Qingqiu who got them out.

 How Luo Binghe accidently saved Shen Qinqqiu-

“Why help this Master? It can’t be because you want to play the part pf a loving disciple? After all,”

Shen Qinqgiu leaned close, speaking softly so others wouldn’t hear.

“This master tried to kill you three times after all.”

Luo Binghe smiled, “This Binghe knew he had bigger threats to face, after knowing the trials I had to overcome…you didn’t seem that scary all of a sudden. And this Binghe knows of worse things to come that taking revenge on my scum Shizun seems like a waste of time to me.”

After Luo Binghe removed the red immortal binding cables, tenderly holding Shen Qingqius hand and unwrapping each rope, his eyes furrowed at how thin Shen Qingqius wrists had become. Shen Qinqqiu had lost weight-

“Luo-Shizi.” Luo Binghe straightened, “ah Sect Leader Yue!” He bowed hastily.

“Apologies, this unfilial disciple never meant to disrespect Cang Qiong mountain-“

Instead the sect leader took his hands and made Luo Binghe look up, the look on his face was stra ge and made Luo Binghe uncomfortable.

And the worst thing happened.

The sect leader bowed to him!

“It was Cang Qiong who has done a great disservice to Luo Binghe.” Everyone in the room heard such a thing, Huan Hua bristled but all the lthers practically hungered for the drama.

 “That we had failed in such a way that you felt that you couldn’t return and felt undeserving. Cang Qiong doors will always be open to Luo Binghe, he doesnt have to prove his worth or fear rejection to come home.”

Oh- oh!

 He had to admit, Yue Qingyuan was similar to him, killing them with kindness. Making it seem as if they were the perfect sect family outside, and creating this humble narrative that Luo Binghe didnt deviate and spit on Cang Qiong but it was in fact a simple miscommunication!

 Then Shen Qingqiu spoke as well, “Yes. Qing Jing Peak is your home, unless Luo Binghe doesn’t want to return to the mountain that took him in?”

Oh, now everyone was watching Luo Binghe.

 But…they both could accuse him of being a demon, so why not use that instead?

Even so, both of them were looking at him expectantly, they all were.

“This Luo Binghe is grateful, and relieved to know that his worries were unnescary and that Cang Qiong still accepts me.”

Shen Qingqiu smirked, looking like he was about to win- until…

“But this Binghe is ungrateful. Huan Hua took me in after I was injured and this one wanted to repay that debt, maybe even foster good relations to both sects. And further more…This Binghe wanted to learn more about his past, the Luo River is closer to Huan Hua where I was born and wanted to learn about my past.”

 Luo Binghe gave them both beseaching looks.

“Can this one still stay at Huan Hua until I find the answers I am looking for?”

Shen Qingqiu looked annoyed, the Palace Master even inturupted.

“Yes! Why Luo Binghe was forced to find sanctuary here and never returned to Cang Qiong is a mystery! And Shen Qinqgiu! You claimed he had died at the immortal alliance!”

Shen Qinqqiu gritted his teeth, and the others became more rowdy.

 “Luo Binghe will remain here, until he feels comfortable speaking the truth and has no fear of the power and influence both of you have.”

Luo Binghe was touched this father figure was coming to his aid, but he couldn’t be more wrong, he was a demon emporer. He had a lot of power and influence.

________

“Afterall I’m the scum Shizun! And you are the victim! Always blaming me when in reality you hurt yourself,” luo Binghe paused huh?

 “What? No- never ind that.” Why was Shen Qingqiu upset anyway? “Look I’m at Huan Hua now, far away from you. And we can both pretend the other doesn't exist!” Then Luo Binghe paused.

“What are you doing taking missions so close to Huan Hua in the first place?”

Shen Qinqgiu ignored him.

 “What this master does with his own time is his own buisness.”

Okay.

Even so, Luo Binghe figured Madam Meiyan may help with Xin Mo, he can only spend so many b-points on suppressing it, but if it acted up in Huan Hua he may accidently trigger a papapa scene with one of the women and he didnt need that!

Why was it that no matter what mission and what he wanted to do, Shen Qingqiu was there!?

Always in trouble, always causing trouble, really playing the petty scum villain and being an overall pain in the neck!

Xin Mo kept telling Luo Binghe to just kill him and one of these days he may just listen to it!

 -wife plot with SQQ

 He had no idea why, Luo Binghe was on his way to another peak to investigate his mothers origins Meng Mo found a lead of a familair disciple who knew Binghes ‘mother’

Also the imposter syndrome he figured Origianal goods would lose face but this Luo Binghe was only looking into the plot, if his parents were alive he doubted they would be close, 

_____________________

And this is where I lost steam and had no idea what to write next, that LBH/sy is ignoring sqq and focusing on himself but when the others in trouble he goes "Ah well its the scum villain who cares...but I have to ask questions I'm the protagonist, and I want to ask questions about this plothole and such-" accidently uncovers Sqq past and reveals it was self-defense.

Whoops?

Now SQQ wants Luo Binghe back at Cang Qiong NOT because he cares about the little beast- it looks bad on HIM as a Peak Lord that he has some unruly disciple avoiding his peak like he's some abused little maiden running away from her husband.

Shen Qingqiu would break his fan at the thought, that little brat loved it! Shen Qingqiu has never raised a hand to the beast in years!

Luo Binghe even claims he hates him, that he's a scum Shizun and never cared so why does Binghe go out of his way to save Shen Qingqiu? instead of washing his hands of him, it doesn't make sense....

_______________________

Yeah I do want SQQ and Binghe to be end game, like SY is fascinated by SQQ as a character and has more interest in him than the women of the harem.

[mdzs-owns-my-ass-i-guess]

Arguments:

Yue Qingyuan: he's sect leader so he has enough authority and respect for the junior disciples not to giggle too much to his face. Uses very elegant and veiled language, lots of euphemisms. Qi Qingqi heard him refer to vaginas as "flowers" once and she nearly qi deviated. He keeps it brief and vague and doesn't take more than two questions which he usually redirects to Mu Qingfang because he's a doctor and not because Yue Qingyuan is too flustered. He focuses a lot on being respectful and gentle, as well as ready to take responsibility if accidents happen. There's a rumor in CQM for a week that YQY is boringly vanilla in bed if his flowery lesson is anything to go by (it isnt).

Qi Qingqi: very thorough, with a focus on why it's important to be safe, sane and consensual. She teaches a very detailed class on women's health and bodies and everybody has to attend and take notes. There will be a test at the end. No, it doesnt matter if youre gay or ace. You take the test. Extra lesson on sexual harrassment because she has seen the way men ogle her female disciples and she made it a point to remind everyone that her peak disciples are taught a secret technique to emergency castrate men if so needed (nobody knows if this is actually true but nobody wants to find out).

Shang Qinghua: goes into way too much detail. It somehow feels like an engineering lesson, he is very focused on the logistics of things and what goes where. Use lube and don't beat your partner up unless it's been negotiated before are his main lessons and everyone can tell it's from personal experience. He's very open to talk about kinks and fetishes, though. Recommends buying his own bad smut as guide for sex. Sales dont skyrocket, go figure. His disciples are pretty sure that their peak lord isnt having sex the right way.

Liu Qingge: "if you have sex you will die." is how he starts the lesson. He lists out all the possible bad consequences of sex, from UTIs and pregnancies, to deadly STDs and qi deviation. He doesn't believe in dual cultivation, if you want to improve your core you have to train like a normal person. The lesson is mostly about how to defend oneself in case of a non-consensual situation. The whole CQM decides nobody fucks on Bai Zhan peak because they are too scared of Liu Qingge.

Shen Qingqiu (as Shen Yuan): he is very flustered about it, with his thin face and all, so he mostly focuses on the emotional side of it, how it should be with someone trustworthy and enthusiastically consensual. He also drops the more uncomfortable questions on to Mu Qingfang. If you mention the Song of Bingqiu to him, you receive 57 laps around the mountain precisely. Makes it a point to say that, if accidents do happen, he is open to help out with any unexpected children. His disciples are even more flushed than he is because he didnt turn off the wife beam.

Shen Qingqiu (as Shen Jiu): no. He wont do it. They can read about it in books or ask Mu Qingfang or whatever other alternative, Shen Jiu isn't teaching them anything about that. He isnt doing this full stop. Its bad enough people look down on him for visiting brothels, like hell will he talk about it to a bunch of horny teenagers. They'll figure it out eventually. He drops something like "make sure you dont force anyone into it including yourself" and doesnt elaborate.

Mu Qingfang: everyone just expects him to do it so he's the CQM's Aunt Flo whether he likes it or not. He's the most normal about it, explaining everything in medical terms and presenting possible negative comsequences rationally, without fearmongering. The only one open to answering all questions, no matter how wild. Shen Qingqiu and Luo Binghe also sneakily attend the lesson for...additional information. He is very calm and relaxed about it. Everyone thinks Mu Qingfang gets mad hole in his free time because he knows everything about everything.

[biinaberry]

With the Doomed Polycule AU how are the rest of the peak Lords affected after SY gets put under house arrest, and also after he disappears during the immortal alliance conference. I would imagine that SJ and YQY's relationship with deteriorate further and after the disappearance, YQY probably wouldn't be able to look SJ in the eyes, and SJ I could I can probably see him either telling YQY that if he ever comes to Qing Jing peak he's going to kill him or he could just leave without a word a go search for his brother.

Shen yuan in doomed poly is way more active than you would think. The Qiu household hardened him to where he doesnt take anyone's shit. He wants control just like his brother, but he is willing to use his hands to do so. He often fights with Qi Qingqi and Liu Qingge when they talk shit about his brother which leaves him with not a lot of friends outside of his disciples, Shang Qinghua and Mu Qingfang who he frequency goes on scavenging hunts for.

By the time the trial occurs no one is really Shocked or revolted. Sure they prefer him to his brother but they dont try to defend him. They're more surprised with the favoritism YQY shows by preventing him from being executed.

When it gets to immortal conference, YQY tries, but SXY lobs the palace master's decapitated head at him and asks if he wants to be next. So he drops it, he knows he failed again. But this time with the other shen brother. YQY favors SJ over SY even if he doesn't want to acknowledge it. When SJ comes to him saying he saw SY colluding with demons, he takes him at his word, and even spies on SY himself. Neither of them question SY to get an explanation and instead stick with this narrative in their head. After the first 2 years of isolation SJ never visits again because he is disgusted with his brother and how he is a traitor just like he suspected. And YQY visited but SY tells him to leave and never return, which he follows. Neither of them want to acknowledge or think about being wrong because that means confronting that they put their brother in complete isolation for 10+ years. YQY is guilty, but unlike with SJ there is no way to explain his way out of it. They left their brother to rot. To an outsider they look the same, but internally they are rotting. The people who are most vocal in their disgust is MQF and SQH who always rebelled against the idea and snuck in to visit SY when they can, but it is never frequent enough.

[lynnthefrenchtoast]

The Tragedy of Qijiu; Analysis

aka: reason why Yue Qingyuan and Shen Jiu make me ugly sob

1. the things left unsaid

the most poignant part of the novel for this ship is this line: "Too late. It was already too late! Shen Jiu was no longer here. He would never again be able to hear Yue Qingyuan’s words, never ever.”

and again, in the character notes: "He (sy) is no longer the intended recipient of this favor. Yue Qingyuan will have to find his own closure, as the person he looks for behind the new Shen Qingqiu’s eyes will no longer return.”

READ THAT SHIT. READ IT. ISNT IT TRAGIC???

ygy and sj spent their whole lives since they were little kids with unspoken words between them, longing glances, misunderstandings and hidden affections. you know who else does that? THE MAIN COUPLE OF SCUMS VILLAIN: luo binghe and shen yuan.


EXCEPT

we get to watch them fix their misunderstanding. we get to watch binghe realize he was never hated for his heritage. we get to watch shen yuan realize he is saved from retribution for sins he never committed. this is a privilege qijiu never gets.

the worst part? they almost get it.

because yue qingyuan does, in (what he believes are) his final moments, try to communicate. it's the beautiful cliche "im dying so ill tell you everything" except its not beautiful because the person he needs to tell is GONE. he was gone the whole time and YUE QINGYUAN DOESNT EVEN KNOW:

2. YUE QINGYUAN'S SOULMATE IS DEAD AND HE DOESNT KNOW

is that not like INSANE???

like yeah, the person you love dying is tragic. but its even more tragic that they were so distant he cannot even tell shen jiu and shen yuan apart. he will never know his beloved is gone from the world; he is not even awarded the privilege to mourn

and he can NEVER know. sy is literally prohibited by the system from telling him. so happens is:

3. YUE QINGYUAN MUST FALSELY BELIEVE HIS SOULMATE REJECTED HIM FOR ANOTHER GUY

+

4. yue qingyuan fails shen jiu at each and every opportunity

can you IMAGINE? he got into cultivation to save his xiao jiu from the qiu manor. he failed. he became the leader of the sect to be a man shen jiu could one day respect. shen never respects him (even shen yuan canonically is like "dude wtf? this is the sect leader; shen jiu treats him so disrespectfullt?") . yue qingyuan tries to protect shen jiu from luo binghe - fails. tried to save him after receiving his two legs in the mail but failed and died trying. tries to save shen yuan - shows up too late and shen yuan gets poisoned without a cure. tries to take on debt for shen yuan - shen yuan wins the spirit stones. tries to fight mobei jun - fails and shen jiu falls into depression because he lost binghe due to his failure. tried to lock up a heavenly demon - succeeded! but that ultimately led to the birth of the even stronger heavenly demon who goes on to torture his beloved for a decade.

yue qingyuan is a man in power without the power to succeed at the one thing he needs to.

conversely, shen jiu, a little slave with no name or power changed his live. when yqy needed him, shen jiu selflessly stepped in danger's way and saved him successfully. yqy never repays his debt even though he tries so hard.

and then his xiao jiu falls in love with the young demon boy who wreaks havoc and kidnaps him and kinda treats him like shit. he fails at earning shen jiu's love too.

5. yue qingyuan never finds out that shen jiu loved him.

shen yuan likely believed yue qingyuan abhorred him. what shen yuan feels for yue qingyuan is likely a mix of "you betrayed me so i must hate you + you hate me so in return i must hate you. but in reality if you were to look close i dont hate you at all. but ill act like i do because i must hate you."

yue qingyuan though? there was no question. his feelings for shen jiu were always love and shen jiu will never know that, so there will never be a chance for shen jiu to change his mind, to not think "you do not hate me so i do not have to hate you, you love me so i can love you"

this kinda ties into the "words left unsaid" point EXCEPT at least shen jiu gets one time where he finds out how yqy feels. yqy never ever in any universe finds out. he thinks shen jiu is determined to never call him qi-ge again.

6. but even when shen jiu gets to find out yue qingyuan loves him, it is the most tragic way of doing so

i want you to imagine:

you love this person. you trusted them and they betrayed you. you hate that they make you feel weak so you place distance between you two. they look down on you so you respond in turn, with harsh words and harsher actions.

and then they die a horrific death- stabbed by ten thousand arrows- to come save you.

you realize they never meant to betray you, never looked down on you.

you were so mean and distant for nothing.

you cannot say sorry. they are dead. it is your fault.

shen jiu so eagerly wrote that letter to yqy, not because he wanted to escape torture but because he was so confident yqy wouldnt come.

he didnt come last time, so why did he come now!?

EXTRA

they are the epitome of the childhood friends to lovers & "i loved you all along" trope. they have seen each other in every stage of their loves and still, in their convoluted way, loved each other even with all the tension between them

golden retriever x black cat

yue qingyuan totally spoils shen qingqiu. if he tolerates that level of disrespect? yk damn well qing jing peak is never short of funding

shen jiu really is in desperate need of being loved. he like, is a character that claims he doesnt care to be liked but we all know its human nature to want to be appreciated and loved. "i dont need you to love me" "i love you" "oh"

the potential for a: "i dont need your pity" "its not pity i just care about you" or a "why do you even care?" "because i love you" or a (as catra and adora say) "i know you all hate me!" "i never hated you" dialogue drop

the potential for a deku -> izuku moment. i mean yue qingyuan literally canonically foreshadows it: "are you so determined to never call me qi-ge again?"

misunderstood x "i see past your mask" (ive written more about this dynamic in my lynaether post tumblr wont let me link but the in summary: blablabla human desire to be understood and human tendency to self sabotage and hide your flaws yada yada "i hold the ugliest parts of you up to the lie and dont even flinch")

FEEL FREE TO ADD UR EXTRA BULLET POINTS IN THE COMMENTS

[verycharismaticdragon]

Okay, I promised a writeup of Luo Binghe voter fraud meme, and as Luo Binghe is currently in the finals of the poll this happened on, I figure now's a good time.

So! It all started when Luo Binghe, our beloved half-demon child, was submitted to @/hybrid-battle tournament - or rather, as it was called at the time, @half-being-battle. He won his first poll easily enough, but round 2 was a close battle where he and his opponent, Shantae from eponymous game, took the lead from one another a few times.

In the last ~12 hours, Binghe was losing slightly after a popular blog rb'd the poll with a call to vote for Shantae. However, SVSSS fandom caught this in time and passed the poll around some more. The poll ended with Luo Binghe winning with 51% of votes - or, as simple calculation will reveal, 14 votes lead.

We breathed out a collective sigh of relief, but too soon - as half a day later, someone sent this ask:

(x)

Initially the pollrunner wasn't intending to do anything about it, but then someone suggested a teamup option, and the poll for the option was made (x). It was rb'd by some SVSSS fans with the general sentiment of 'free our boy he did nothing wrong', but didn't gain real traction until:

@gaywarcriminals reblogged it with a small rant in Binghe's defense

@piosplayhouse rb'd said rant with addition of the image from vol.3 cover, of Shen Qingqiu holding Luo Binghe's hand, edited to look like SQQ is the one saying the text above.

This version of the post was circulated in fandom overnight, leading to 'Luo Binghe moves on alone' option winning by a large margin - and, ofc, to the birth of "Luo Binghe voter fraud" meme.

Though aside from this particular post being funny, there was another factor contributing to the meme catching on: how damn in-character it all was. The following sentiments were all repeated more than once in the post's notes:

Luo Binghe getting accused of crimes he didn't commit? Omg just like in canon!

Shen Yuan would absolutely buy bots to get his most beloved blorbo to win an internet poll.

It's just Luo Binghe's protagonist halo!

All of which made the situation fucking hilarious.

Then, the next day, tumblr user verycharismaticdragon (whoever they might be 😉) made some fanart about it, which possibly aided the spread of the meme too.

Also, SVSSS fandom surprised the mod with our chillness 😅

(x)

Since then, Binghe has been going strong in that poll - and now, he's in the finals! So make sure to vote for him; as we all know now, the real voter fraud is the friends we made along the way. And I do recommend checking Luo Binghe's tag on the poll for some fun propaganda we've been making, including a family tree by Pio and some more art by yours truly <3

But wait! There was also another layer to the voter fraud iceberg. The tl;dr:

At about the same time Luo Binghe vs Shantae ended, Hua Cheng was losing in round 1 of @/the-ghost-bracket, with something like 39% of votes to his name. In a desperate move, I linked his poll under my bingqiu voter fraud art, which gave him a boost to get close to a tie, but didnt flip the poll. The next day, I was explaining the LBH voter fraud meme to my friends, and mentioned Hua Cheng's poll too - which was when inspiration struck me, resulting in...

this post. [ID: art of Xie Lian with a wooden board which reads "Puqi shrine accepting donations in the form of votes for Hua Cheng in the ghost bracket", captioned "please help dianxia, he doesn't have the money for voter fraud"] Which gave the poll enough visibility for Hua Cheng to win with over 62% of votes in the end. (The link in the post is currently changed to round 2 poll, which HC was also initially losing. Srsly besties we gotta follow the tourneys to get our babygirls to win!)

So: LBH voter fraud meme had even helped little bro Huahua out.

And thats about it! Since then, the scum villain fandom has been joking about voter fraud on all of our polls 😂

(Aaaand the last reminder to vote Bingbing in the finals. His opponent has been gaining lately and I think we shouldn't leave it to the protagonist halo this time.)

[complakei]

I think something that probably takes up a good 3/4 of my thinking space is like. How does the scum villain timeline work so that shang qinghua dies and transmigrates into pidw as a little babe yet still finishes writing it but shen yuan transmigrates post peak lord inauguration????? like i absolutely cannot come up with an explanation for this at all because it would make sense if they were transmigrated into different worlds within the pidw universe so that's not right either..... of course there's also the usual Space And Time Fuckery but that explanation just feels sooooo lackluster.... IT DOESNT MAKE SENSE

and also what is the criteria to be transmigrated into a certain character????? like do u have to share a last name (i.e. 沈垣 transmigrates into 沈九 / 沈清秋) which means that airplanes last name would be 尚 something.... obviously it's not someone that matches their personality because if that was it i think that shen yuan would have transmigrated into like.. maybe mu qingfang WHICH WOULD HAVE BEEN REALLY INGERESTING CAN SOMEONE EXPLORE THAT

maybe it's the character that they hate the most??? because shen yuan blames shen jiu for the way bingge turned out to be and is kinda the reason everything happened so maybe airplane hated shang qinghua??? maybe because he was close to mobei (his dream man) and absolute canon fodder???? but i don't know how realistic that is IDK IDKKKKK

i think another solid argument would be the character that they look most similar to. we know that shen yuan looks Really Really similar to shen jiu which is why sha hualing kidnapped him in the vegetable body to make bing happy and shen yuan has described his former self as "a dispirited pretty boy sitting around waiting to die" (i will expand on this in another post i have so many thoughts on this) which would also make sense for airplane to transmigrate into shang qinghua because dream man = guy who knows dream man = self insert character whether subconscious or otherwise...... i don't know i need someone else's input you guys 😭😭😭

[horsegirlwarcrimes]

would u tell me a bit about some svsss thoughts, au‘s ideas or wips of yours?(<- half way through a 9 hour train/bus journey & really bored) please?🥺

i could tell u about my tgirl-sqq/sy au that i’m never gonna write, cuz i genuinely don’t enjoy writing? or maybe show u a picture of my sisters newborn (cutest baby u have ever seen)

omg PLEASE tell me ur thoughts on tgirl sqq I love trans sqq (any direction but esp transfem it's so special to me)

let'sss see, I have a lot of wip and au thoughts at the moment as I nervously procrastinate several important projects 😅

I had a cold earlier this week so I wrote half of a fluffy fic inflicting my cold onto SQQ:

“Liu-shidi is out at the moment,” Shen Qingqiu said, an awful rasp to his voice that Luo Binghe hated.  “Surely Shizun can call him back?” Luo Binghe pleaded.  “For what?” Shen Qingqiu asked, waving a sleeve. “A small cold? This master has managed worse. He’ll return when he returns, and until then it's not so bad.”  “But Shizun–” Luo Binghe tried to object, but Shen Qingqiu gave him a stern look that caused Luo Binghe to fold at once. He redoubled his efforts of looking sad and concerned and despondent as a quick countermeasure, and Shen Qingqiu sighed.  “It’s not so bad,” he repeated. “This master can still perform his duties just fine. Most likely it will pass before Liu Qingge even returns.”

outside of that, i have been on a major qijiu brainrot kick (i have a 8k fic for them i should be posting as soon as i decide if it needs a stronger dose of sqq or not + decide how to end it (sob)), and also reading a ton of disciple days/canon timeline bingqiu and having big feelings about how much i love them. ive also been returning to my unhorny women and gender studies liu qingge omegaverse fic that i am always contemplating but never actually writing, in which liu qingge is a not-like-other-girls omega in PIDW omegaverse and tries to marry shen qingqiu due to fantasy comp het

besides that, here are some concepts ive jotted down in my notes app this week loll:

dragon!YQY hoarding peak lords

this is literally all i have written down for this but i want it to be something SO BAD. save me dragon yqy. dragon yqy save me

Yue Qingyuan is cursed into an endless sleep The other peak lords call on Shen Qingqiu to enter his mind and wake him up as the person closest to him, only... SQQ actually barely knows this guy! He and Binghe take a dream journey through YQY's subconscious and eventually find that SJ is haunting him and eating his power which is keeping him asleep. They must either banish him ORRR.... Sun and Moon Dew mushroom time

i dont think ill write this so if anyone else does....... please take this idea and run w it haha

Sy transmigrated into the little palace Mistress??? Ahhh...

i THINK this came after reading stiltonbasket's SY!QWY fic, because i was thinking about the old palace master being a huge creep and shen yuan dealing with that from inside huan hua palace. i really see shen yuan going on a journey of gender discovery (his own gender AND the perils of misogyny that he never understood as a cis internet man(he thought he was cis at least)) and political intrigue as he tries to get to the heart of whats wrong with huan hua while dodging and or attempting to track down luo binghe. plot??? idk her

Deaf Shang qinghua!! Mbj doesnt notice

someday i must write this bc i love writing my favs as deaf or hoh. id love to explore shang qinghua as being both physically and culturally Deaf and how that plays into his interactions with the world post-transmigration, where there is even less accommodations or access for someone with a disability and he is cut off from his community, especially in terms of his work on an ding and relationship with his martial siblings. mbj not noticing a major facet of his life feels in character and like great drama lol, and i think the conclusion is definitely mbj learning ZGS that teaches him and he ends up liking using it way more than speaking verbally, both for sqh's ease and because he doesnt like to talk lol

i hope this is what u meant hahaha i could talk abt wips and svsss ideas all day. they are living in my head rent free 24/7 ｡ﾟ(TヮT)ﾟ｡ i hope your trip goes by smoothly and quickly!!

[mymoshangthoughts]

cumplane thoughts: (lots of nsfw LOL)

airplane in shen yuan's lap, cockwarming for him while he writes and shen yuan looks over his shoulder, sharply criticizing his writing

shen yuan using his advanced knowledge of pidw to wifeplot the fuck out of airplane (its not his fault that airplane doesnt remember that flower is an aphrodisiac or this cave is the "ohno now we have to get married!" cave. really, it was irresponsible of airplane to forget such things and this was the forgone conclusion of that hack author being so forgetful)

cucumber and airplane being enemies online, but crushing on each other irl without knowing about the online handles (classmates? workmates? that cute guy i see on the train?)

shen twins au where shen yuan notices that disciple shang is kinda sus and investigates (thinking that its bc of the mobei jun thing and now that he's grown up in this world he's sort of invested in NOT having demons attack his sect-mates), but the more he gets to know the skittish disciple, the more he's sorta catching feelings and this is a problem! bc shang qinghua is gonna be a traitor! ....but is he really? sure, qinghua is a lil asshole, but he's not really the bloodthirsty type? maybe with some proper guidance from his shixiong he'll turn out better? no, jiu-ge, i am not being naive and no i dont think my dick cures evil, its not like that! it's just that--why are you calling him my boyfriend?! I SAID IT'S NOT LIKE THAT, JIU-GE!

cumplane frenemies since their school days and current roommates. shen "i'm not gay so the sex isnt gay" yuan and shang "you're not fooling anyone but sure" qinghua. they're just 'friends' according to shen yuan. it's 'no homo sex' apparently. shang qinghua is fine with this, he is, his stupid boyfriend might have the most internalized homophobia in the world but like... they live together and shen yuan is mostly nice to him and they've been together for years and this is something real, right? except shen yuan's mom starts pressuring him to "finally settle down and marry a nice girl" so shen yuan is talking about it and the sinking realization finally hits shang qinghua that shen yuan never really considered their relationship to be a real thing. thats... fine... this is fine... he'll be fine. he is not fine. nope. not one bit. and he is not gonna be the bigger man about this. fuck. no. he is absolutely going to fucking destroy that stupid piece of shit EX boyfriend who never deserved him!! he is going to avenge himself and ruin shen yuan's life and he is going to be super shitty about it! but first, he's going to run away from home and cry with a tub of ice-cream bc wow that is the most painful breakup he's ever had haha. except after shang qinghua disappears and leaves behind a "fuck you, i want a divorce" note, shen yuan looks for him and asks friends and gets dressed down for being an idiot and also realizes oh fuck he actually totally was in love with his not-boyfriend and now he has to win back a very vengeful and very bitter shang qinghua, who also knows all of his weaknesses and darkest secrets

cumplane sex where cucumber is struggling to comprehend just how fucking shameless airplane is. that man can ride his dick while moaning pathetically and then still look cucumber in the face and smile while asking for round five and cucumber knew that airplane wrote porn, cucumber READ that porn, but nothing quite prepared him for just how horny and sexually expressive airplane is. SHEN YUAN'S THIN FACE WAS NOT READY FOR THIS SHIT

shang twins au: the shang twins have been pretending to be one person, for vaguely evil reasons, and shen yuan notices solely bc he Is A Very Observant and Smart Person and it's not at all because he's memorized the pattern of airplane's freckles or anything gay like that, nope, that's not it at all!

cucumber starts talking to one of airplanes various troll alts that he uses to stir up drama and airplane replies, fully intending to further agitate one of his loudest anti-fans except.... they just kinda... keep talking? and airplane is really enjoying himself? and they're taking it to the dms and now they're kinda friends and shit, it's bad if cucumber finds out he's airplane, right? the entire basis of their friendship is a lie then. which is totally fine, haha, this friendship prolly won't last long. except it totally does and now theres like irl meetings and cucumber is Fucking Handsome and that isn't fair AT ALL bc now airplane has a crush on his (best??)friend and ohwow, cucumber can srsly NEVER learn abt his identity as the author. cucumber is a super bitter and grudge holding person but also he HATES the author and airplane rreeeallly likes having someone who kinda likes him in his life aND OHFUCK IS THAT CUCUMBER LOOKING AT HIS PHONE!?

shen yuan making airplane endure Every Single sex position that he wrote those poor wives in the harem having to endure. partially to make a point of "that CANT be possible", partially bc he's still annoyed at the hack writing, and partially bc it's rrreeeeeaallly nice to see airplane fucked out of his mind like that

airplane accidentally wife-plots himself and cucumber is a good bro about it and fucks away the fuck-or-die pollen. except now he's accidentally gotten airplane addicted to his dick??? bc now airplane is seeking him out constantly. was there something else in that fuck-or-die pollen? bc airplane is acting weird. was there some freaky love potion or something? ahh, it's really hard to think of the answer when he wakes up to the peak lord of an ding sucking his dick

airplane accidentally gets transformed into a magical beast and before he can find his way back to humanity, he gets beaten up and hauled off by liu qingge to be presented as a gift to shen yuan. which oki, fine, maybe he can communicate to his bro. but shen yuan is really nice to him when he's in this form (like a hamster monster) and wow, he never knew how much he really liked shen yuan being nice to him??? maybe he should just let it be for a bit longer??

shen yuan, recently trasnmigrated into the body of an ice demon, does not know what to do about the sobbing an ding disciple clinging to his thigh and begging for his life (bc i refuse to kill off mobei jun, this is a body swap au and now mobei jun has to live in modern day china as shen yuan LOL)

cucumber decides that he likes airplane best when he's too fucked out of his mind to keep talking shit. also, on a related note, airplane decides he likes when cucumber talks shit when they're in bed the most. does he have a degradation kink? he might have a degradation kink.

sugar baby airplane and his very grumpy sugar daddy shen yuan. yes, airplane is spoiled rotten, but he also has a strict writing schedule and his harshest critic tormenting him in bed. but ohwell, shen yuan also nags him to eat properly and makes sure that he does and the kitchen is always stocked and sometimes shen yuan just pulls him into a hug and rests his chin against airplane's head and yeah, he can live with sometimes getting fucked while cucumber growls in his ear "that was a shit chapter, you completely forgot the continuity from chapter 24 and now you created a big stupid plothole with the most interesting monster you made--". its a good life

airplane first meets shen yuan as a coworker. he's a rich trust-fund baby type who has impeccable fashion and a poser attitude. clearly a thin face and probably boring as fuck. airplane meets shen yuan for the second time at a convention while signing autographs, dressed in binghe-merch and clearly Way Too Invested. and airplane immediately thinks the gap moe is AMAZING. he's gonna have so much fucking fun with this. especially since airplane was wearing cosplay and his coworker didn't recognize him >:D

[danmomomei]

ok but now i'm interested, what Would luo mei think of shen qingqiu/yuan and luo bingmei? also hysterically laughing thinking of him running into mobei-jun (oh, that icy guy who patted me on the head once) and shang qinghua (inexplicably relevant in this timeline, why does he look at me like that, WHAT DO YOU MEAN HE'S MOBEI-JUN'S HUSBAND)

bro ive been trying to answer this ask since u sent it... im really not sure!

i think he grew up hearing about dads old terrible shizun and so meeting sy/sqq hes like. somethings not adding up. *studying sqq under a microscope* *psychoanalyzes him* *manipulates him*

bingmei hmmmm... now of course luo mei isnt fucking meta he doesnt know all there is to know about his dad but he does know he's a fucked up man with a charismatic mask. luo mei looks at bingmei and goes what the fuck happened LOLLLL why is he like this just openly LMFAOOO he'd definitely be freaked out like. ew. 😂😂😂

as for mobei-jun and shang qinghua, luo mei really doesnt give a fuck... hes like okay shang qinghua? thats nobody lmfao... mobei-jun? i guess hes somebody... barely

[rivthewriter]

was listening to one of my playlists earlier and a song (Dear McCracken by Bug Hunter) got me thinking of a 'binghe and mobei transmigrate to the real world' au mostly focusing on mobei and qinghua's relationship. Mobei fits in perfectly with the no-nonsense businessmen of this world, qinghua is his assistant (while also still the author we know and love/loathe) and qinghua ends up like, moving away from where mobei has worked his way up in the ranks to being like the head of the company, wouldn't be hard for him, being a demon king and all. (idk how companies work i used to work fast food and write in my free time.) and the thoughts i had were: Imagine, an animatic where Shen Yuan, boards a plane, middle seat, binghe on his left, qinghua on his right, but he doesnt *know* qinghua is airplane-bro. so the entire time they're waiting for this plane to take off, Shen Yuan is just watching Qinghua write and delete and write and delete this letter he's been drafting and it shows scenes of mobei and qinghua interacting in this modern world and mobei being like, stubborn about something regarding qinghua trying to send him home, and this is all written as qinghua is like, doing his stupid fucking running away thing, and when it says 'in the rough draft she loved you' in the song?? i got floored with the idea of it flashing to the like, moshang we know and love. because in this au, that would have been the rough draft. and then I was imagining like, a small after song sequence, where it shows like, normal qinghua, outside of au, waking up at his little table with his ink and his brush and he's got smudges of ink on his face and the paper is ruined by a little bit of drool, and he looks up and there's mobei, standing in the doorway with his eyebrow raised and his head tilted like "were you sleeping on the job?" and its cute and that's where it would end. and im.. gay and sappy and rambling farewell.

[drag0nalias0]

!!!!!!!! HOLY FUCK I LOVE THIS FIC

A story of true love.. so cheesy but my heart. Bingge deserves it.

Such a good ending. :3 my heart cant take it

______________________________________________

Some of my favourite parts in pretty much no order below (fic spoilers)---->

_“A comedy of errors,” he grumbles. “A tragedy. My own personal obituary, maybe.”_

<- correct me if im wrong but isnt this just scum villain.

_“Transmigration?” Luo Binghe asks, clearly not having expected that particular response.

“Since you came from a different world -”

Luo Binghe shifts suddenly, rolling them both over so that Shen Yuan is on his back and Luo Binghe is hovering over him, his face inches from Shen Yuan’s own.

Shen Yuan falls silent, staring up at him. Luo Binghe searches Shen Yuan’s face, expression especially intense, but eventually he just shakes his head.

“No,” he says. “Even if that’s right, don’t talk about it. I don’t care about that anymore.”

Shen Yuan blinks up at Luo Binghe, only growing more confused. Did he want a serious answer or not, ah?!

“I’m asking about our story,” Luo Binghe clarifies._

<- did he figure out what was up with the svsss timeline. "I dont care about that anymore" bingge "that"? "Im asking about _our_ story" uhh bingge has figure it out right. Good for him

_He should probably also make it clear to Luo Binghe that he wouldn’t have tried even a little bit to help hook Luo Binghe up with his old Shizun if he knew his old Shizun was actually a villain and not just an actor. Actually, he should probably figure out why the hell Luo Binghe had been looking to romance that villain to begin with, and - and fuck, is that the sort of thing you send someone to therapy for?? Does Luo Binghe need therapy???_

<-send his ass to therapy. Sy not know why bingge wants to find shen qingqiu and make him fall in love is just so funny. Cuz like thats him, he is the other shizun, he just looks differnt and doesnt have to act like a prestigious cultivator

_He’s still Shen Yuan’s Luo Binghe, too - the Luo Binghe that Shen Yuan has been carefully training to be a good boy!!_

<- my heart. I cant get over how hes trained bingge

_“Okay, I’m over it now,” Shen Yuan says, nodding to himself.

He is not, in fact, over it, but he’s reached a state of acceptance_

<- i just think this is fucking hilarious. The guy who he thought was some unhinged cosplayer is actually the demonic emperor he said he was. Any the thing that helped kickstart his cultivation was a forehead kiss. A forehead kiss. Not duel cultivation. Not a kiss on the mouth. But a forehead kiss. That is so sweet. Forehead kisses are top tier

_“Another option you might have is a maid cafe - some people like the tsundere asshole type, so you could make it your brand.”_ ......

_“Hm,” he hums consideringly, eyes narrowed at the overly happy people dressed in service outfits and holding various cutesy foods. “This one isn’t bad.”_ ........

_“No! No, no, look -” Shen Yuan frantically pulls up a picture that features a man in it too, dressed in a far more reasonable butler’s outfit with absolutely no thigh on display. “You’d be dressed up like this, no - no anything you’re thinking of!!”

“Oh,” Luo Binghe says, sounding a bit disappointed._ .............

_“That’s alright, Yuan-ge can buy me the outfit separately -” “No ‘Yuan-ge’ right now!!” Shen Yuan yells, only a little bit hysterically._

<- awww :( no maiddress bingge?!? How sad :( but i just noticed that sy said nothing about not buying the outfit 😏 

_Once, when Shen Yuan had first taken up reading about puppy training in an attempt to tame this wild dog of his, he’d read that puppies who don’t receive proper socialization and play with others can end up keeping their habits of biting and teething on others as a fully mature dog. 

Luo Binghe bites quite a bit._

<- i still cant believe he treated him like a dog. It just gets me everytime he calls bingge a dog. Its just so fucking hilarious

_Luo Binghe takes it, navigates to the clock app to set a timer for two hours, and hands it back to Shen Yuan. Shen Yuan glances down at the timer and then back up at Luo Binghe, skeptical.“...You know it takes like five minutes tops for someone to buy something, right?” “I’ll keep him busy,” Luo Binghe promises, expression serious. “What is this, a boss fight? Why are you saying it like that?” Shen Yuan grumbles. “A very important boss fight,” Luo Binghe agrees. “I should get a kiss for good luck.” “Fuck off,” Shen Yuan says, pushing Luo Binghe’s face away again when he leans in close. “You aren’t getting anything in public.”_

<- no kisses for bingge :( also sj being a boss fight hsjsk giving bingge all the luck

_yes, sj spends an insufferably long time at their stall, judging all the baked goods and making snide comments about lbh and subtley making sure sy is alright. yes, he has his own timer that goes off at an 1hr 50 min, which is his sign to leave. bingge chews on sy as stress relief about it all._

<- that is so mean. I mean its good hes check on sy but the timer was just mean. Ok maybe a bit deserved but still. Also stress toy sy cracks me up. Bingges emotional support stress chew.

_“Now I’ve hired you to be my boyfriend,” Luo Binghe says, sounding especially pleased with himself. _

<- he fucking uno reversed him :0

So mamy other things as well. All the things from the sleeve pouch(i forgot the name, it beings with q but i forgor) the bracelet. The way he runs to get his things when he realises his cultivation is back just melts my heart. And the way sy is just going 'what the fuck' throught those few scenes was just hilarious. Gotta love him.

Although i wonder what happened to airplane. Does he die like normal or does he just continue living. Its hard to say which is worse.

I love all the times bingge is refered to as a dog or an aninal. Bc hes just kinda feral.

Anyway this is such a great fic!!!! I loved reading it!

After being turned away by the nice Shizun of that other world, Luo Binghe finds himself in the modern world where he can find a new nice Shizun for himself. Instead, he finds Shen Yuan, who could not possibly be who he's searching for - he's crass, and inelegant, and looks only vaguely related to Shen Qingqiu. Luckily for both of them, Shen Yuan mistakes Luo Binghe as a cosplayer for hire, and asks to rent him out as his very normal new boyfriend.

🖤 binggeyuan 🖤 fake dating, misunderstandings, post ge vs mei extra 🖤 shen yuan hires "cosplayer" luo binghe to date him 🖤 86k, 11/11 chapters, complete!

the final chapter of this rent-a-bingge journey went up today! thank you to everyone who's been reading along, and i hope you enjoy the finale! :D

also, if you haven't already seen all the lovely fanart for this fic, please go check them out!! > ch1 fanart by quirefeast of binggeyuan's first meeting! > ch2 + ch4 fanart by dubbedcorn of various meme-y moments! > ch5 fanart by NoodledYJ of bingge trying to glue miku together! > non-chapter-specific fanart by softandworm of sy and his weird guard dog!

[charlieroll]

Alright alright so-

I made a design for Shen Yuan from the Beast Cultivation au from @onixdace !! It was so so very awesome and and and just if you see this, read it!!! it's in the tags!!

I thought of keeping the concept of the more animal-like anatomy? but also I'm like.... not good at drawing anatomy in general?? so for the outfit I tried to think of something relatively comfortable and simple, but also keeping a little bit of the beauty that being a Peak LordTM brings, and also keeping the teal green from SJ, but including other shades and colours and yeeeeeea