#i know I’m not beautiful bc I can see myself so clearly

[liesandbrokenhearts]

I'm not just being nice. Your face truly is beautiful. Like, extremely beautiful. I wish you could see it the way everyone else does, because it is a wonderful sight.

I’m sorry I can’t take this in because I know that it is an attempt to make me feel better, but I truly appreciate it all the same. Thank you for showing me compassion either way.

[mysterious-corpse]

I think somethings rlly fucking wrong with me

[ericityyy]

Hi!

Can i request a fluff georgie x reader where he is head over heals with her?

The family dont know who she is (just sheldon bcs they are in the same university and she is very smart), but one day georgie takes her back home to hang out as friends and the family falls in love with how kind smart and charming she is and they are like: "this is the one for him"

Your writing is wholesome 😚

𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐎𝐧𝐞

𝙎𝙪𝙢𝙢𝙖𝙧𝙮: 𝘞𝘩𝘦𝘯 𝘎𝘦𝘰𝘳𝘨𝘪𝘦’𝘴 “𝘴𝘶𝘱𝘱𝘰𝘴𝘦𝘥” 𝘧𝘳𝘪𝘦𝘯𝘥 𝘮𝘦𝘵 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘊𝘰𝘰𝘱𝘦𝘳 𝘍𝘢𝘮𝘪𝘭𝘺

𝙏𝙧𝙤𝙥𝙚: 𝘍𝘳𝘪𝘦𝘯𝘥𝘴 𝘵𝘰 𝘓𝘰𝘷𝘦𝘳𝘴, 𝘉𝘰𝘰𝘬 𝘴𝘮𝘢𝘳𝘵 𝘹 𝘚𝘵𝘳𝘦𝘦𝘵 𝘴𝘮𝘢𝘳𝘵

𝙏𝙮𝙥𝙚: 𝘍𝘭𝘶𝘧𝘧

𝙒𝙤𝙧𝙙 𝘾𝙤𝙪𝙣𝙩: 1,632

𝙈𝙖𝙨𝙩𝙚𝙧𝙡𝙞𝙨𝙩

Sometimes when you look at someone you like, you get this feeling of time slowing down around you but fast forwarding to the moment you imagine yourself with that person. That feeling is what Georgie experiences when with her. Y/N L/N. There are many beautiful girls around the world, but nothing can compare to her.

She’s beautiful in his eyes, no matter what setting they are in, whether it is dark or not. She glows in his eyes. When it’s bright, she’s the cause. When it’s crowded, she’s the only one he sees. When they’re alone, nothing else matters. Needless to say, Georgie will always be proud to admit that he is down bad for this girl, and yet he couldn’t find the courage to do it in front of her.

It is no secret that Georgie is not particularly the smartest one in the family; however, that does not mean that he is dumb. He’s smart in his own way. Everyone is. It’s always comforting when she tells Georgie that he’s not dumb, as other people put it. In her words, she is "book smart” and the boy is “street smart," to which the latter agrees since Y/N does not go outside much.

There’s more ways to enjoy herself in the comfort of her home, more specifically in her room, where all her books and experiments reside.

That’s why she was left confused when she found herself at Dairy Queen with Georgie. How he convinced her to hang outside, she doesn’t know. Clearly it was one of Georgie’s talents to be so convincing. Partly, it was because Y/N couldn’t say no to the boy.

“After graduating high school, I just go to Dr. Sturgis’ class for the hell of it.” Y/N explains while scooping up some ice cream, “My parents are trying to convince me to go to a university and finish my studies altogether; honestly, they just want to brag to our relatives that I graduated college at such a young age.” She furrowed her eyebrows while letting out a bitter smile. “Don’t get me wrong, I love my parents, but I don’t want to rush into college, y'know? I just want to take a break from studying, but I gave them a chance to let me enroll in Dr. Sturgis’ class, but only in his class so technically, still not in college.” Y/N laughed slightly before turning her attention to the person she’s with.

Georgie nodded his head at times when Y/N was telling her story, and the girl noticed, “I’m sorry, I’ve been talking about myself; how about you? What’s the latest news going on with Mr. Georgie Cooper?" The girl smirked smugly at the boy in front of her, making the said boy chuckle nervously.

“Nothing much, really.” Georgie shrugged, not knowing what to tell, “Just the usual, religious mom, coach dad, carefree meemaw, chaotic little sister, know it all little brother, y'know the normal.”

Y/N laughed at his description of his family. Nothing is normal with the Coopers, that’s for sure, but that’s what makes them so unique in a way that the girl wants to have the pleasure of meeting them. And because of that, she blurted out, “They sound fun; it’ll be a joy to meet them personally.” She not-so-subtly hinted to Georgie, who stopped scooping his ice cream.

“Why? "Georgie squinted his eyes confusingly, not really understanding why the girl wanted to meet his family.

Y/N shrugged, playing with her spoon. “Nothing really; I just want to meet them. Is that okay?" She then asked, losing confidence in her voice, which, again, the boy noticed.

“It’s okay, just don’t let them freak you out.”

"Oh, please, how bad can they be?”

・‥...━━━━━━☆☆━━━━━━...‥・

“Y/N, what were your thoughts in Dr. Sturgis’ class today? I think it was motivational. Then again, it’s not like I don’t know what the contents of his lessons are anyway.” Sheldon arrogantly bragged as he walked alongside the older girl. Although he did not know he was being arrogant, it’s just the way he presents himself to people. And Y/N has come to terms with that.

Y/N decided to humor the younger boy as they walked outside the university. “Well, I think Dr. Sturgis made a mistake during his lecture.” Sheldon looked up at her, confused with his face all frowning. “What do you mean by mistake? I’m sure I would have recognized the mistake that Dr. Sturgis made.”

The girl was about to answer when they heard a car honking, startling Sheldon in the process, before they both noticed it was “Georgie!” Y/N exclaimed, a huge smile on her face seeing her friend. She ran up to the car as the boy got out of it to open the passenger door for her.

“Ma’am, your service awaits.” Georgie pretended to tip his imaginary hat. “Why, thank you, kind sir," while Y/N attempted to mimic a British accent, almost doing it perfectly.

“Georgie?” Sheldon asked, confused as he walked to his older brother’s car, "What are you doing here? Where’s Meemaw? Will you be the one taking me home? ”

Georgie sighed a bit annoyed. “Meemaw is a bit busy right now, so I volunteered to pick you up, also because Y/N will be joining us for dinner.”

“Huh. Well, that’s delightful to hear.” Sheldon opened the backseat door, waiting for his brother to come in before speaking again. "Delightful, as in Y/N joining us for dinner and not you picking me up.”

“Would you like to walk home? ”

“No.”

“Georgie!”

・‥...━━━━━━☆☆━━━━━━...‥・

“We’re home!” Georgie shouted once they came inside the door of their home. The Cooper household, it was nerve-wracking for Y/N to experience this kind of situation. She didn’t grow up with that many friends due to her isolating herself most of the time. But there’s a first time for everything.

Sheldon, after pestering Y/N with what mistake Dr. Sturgis made in his lecture, went to his bedroom to drop off his briefcase, but not before telling Y/N that “This isn’t over, L/N.” Y/N raised an eyebrow at the walking boy before turning back to the nearing footsteps.

Mary came face-to-face with Y/N, not being familiar with her. “Hi, I’m sorry. Who are you?” She asked, not wanting to be rude but wanting to know this stranger inside her house.

"Oh, where are my manners?” Y/N offered her hand to the woman, giving her a beaming smile. “I’m Y/N, Mrs. Cooper. I was invited by your eldest son to dinner, but now I figure that you weren’t informed of my presence here in your humble abode.” The girl then turned to Georgie, who shrugged with a smile on his face. “I wouldn’t want to possibly intrude.”

Mary waved a hand in the girl’s direction before shaking hands with her. “Nonsense, darling, I’m happy that Georgie made friends with a gorgeous girl like yourself, and you may call me Mary.” The woman then led them to the dining table, not noticing that Y/N elbowed Georgie once her back turned to them. The boy crouches in pain, not before seeing Y/N’s overly sweet smile.

・‥...━━━━━━☆☆━━━━━━...‥・

“So you mean to say that you go to the same classes with Sheldon at the university?" Missy questioned, interested in the new girl placed between Sheldon and Georgie. “And you survived being with him? Oh, I like you.”

Sheldon looked offended by his sister’s insult before looking content with their mother scolding the twin girl.

“It’s not much of a challenge anyway; I like Sheldon’s wit. It amuses me.” Y/N laughed at Sheldon’s arrogant expression.

“Do you have any religion, Y/N?” Mary asked hopefully. So far, she really likes the girl between her sons; the woman thinks that the girl is the one for Georgie.

Y/N nodded, swallowing her food before answering, “I was born and baptized a Christian, as my family is all Christians.” Mary, after receiving the answer, smiled widely at that, looking at George, motioning her head toward the girl excitedly.

“You mentioned that you graduated high school? At what age?” It was now George’s turn to ask; they were all taking turns getting to know the girl, and by that, it meant questioning her.

“Yes, Mr. Cooper. I actually graduated high school when I was 13. And now, I’m thinking about when I’m going to enroll fully in a university to get my degree. I haven’t really thought about going to college any time soon; basically, Dr. Sturgis’ lectures are just hobbies in a way.”

“And what exactly is your relationship with our Georgie here?” Connie finally asked what most of them were thinking, casually drinking a beer. Y/N choked on her pasta, with Georgie patting her back gently and offering her water, which she took. The boy noticed his family eyeing his actions toward Y/N; he sent them an eye roll.

“We’re just friends, Meemaw," Georgie answered, fighting back the urge to confess his feelings right there and then. But he figured to take this more privately than out in the open with his family present. That doesn’t really scream romantic to him.

Y/N paid no mind to his answer and rubbed her thumb on the back of his hand, smiling at him. "Thanks, darling.” She was grateful for him taking care of her when she was nearly dying earlier. “Don’t mention it, dear.” Georgie smiled back.

They didn’t notice the eyes on them, as they only saw each other right now. Needless to say, the family found the one for Georgie Cooper. He did too.

“I still don’t recall Dr. Sturgis’ mistake earlier.” Well, it was good while it lasted.

𝐀𝐔𝐓𝐇𝐎𝐑’𝐒 𝐍𝐎𝐓𝐄

i am so happy receiving your request :’> you’re my first ever request in this app and i was lowkey losing hope. but thank you so much for requesting this and i hope this lives up to your expectation.

pls don’t be a ghost reader.

[star-girl69]

Fade Into You

Clarisse La Rue x Fem!AphroditeCabin!Reader

—-

sypnosis: you fell first, but clarisse fell harder. requested by anonymous!

a/n: decided to feed y’all today….. two fics i’m a monster that just creates and creates. this was so funny bc i kept accidentally writing angst and i had to stop myself. they’re allowed to have crushes on each other. it’s ok. this was hard anyways i hope you all enjoy!!

Fade Into You - Mazzy Star

warnings: just so cutesy, swearing, mentions of violence, mentions of blood and injury, soft clarisse i looooovvvvveeeeee you, tell me if i missed anything!!

—-

Your chest heaves. You’ve never ran that fast or that far before in your life. Your satyr protector runs ahead to get the healers, and you crash against some random building- a tool shed, maybe?

You groan, crouching down to clutch at your lower leg sporting a large gash running blood. You don’t remember how it happened. Maybe it was when you fell? You could have sliced it open on an unfortunately sharp stick.

You don’t even want to think about the fact that the stupid monster thing chasing you could have gotten close enough to claw at you.

“Hey, hey,” someone says, crouching down next to you. She’s wearing an orange shirt. Her hair is curly, her eyes are pretty and brown, and oxygen isn’t getting to your brain so she kind of seems like an angel. “Oh, wow,” she mutters, looking at your leg. “One second, ‘kay?”

“Wait,” you say, grabbing onto her forearm. She looks up at you.

“I’m going two steps away, dummy.” She laughs, and you’ll remember that sound for the rest of your life.

She leaves you, and you almost want to cry because you feel so alone. You’ve just been told you’re a demigod, then you were forced to run through the woods, your heart is still hammering and your leg fucking burns.

But she was right. It was only two steps, and she comes back, the door of what must be some sort of storage shutting behind her.

She leans back down and presses a towel against your gash.

You hiss.

“Sorry,”

“You’re not.” She laughs again. More beautiful music in your ears.

“I’m not,” she agrees.

You fall into silence, it’s so dark out, but you can see everything about her so clearly.

“You can stop breathing so heavily,” she whispers, the shouting of your satyr protector getting closer, along with what must be the healers. “Camp Half-Blood is surrounded by a magical barrier. You’re safe here. Well, at least, no monsters are gonna get you.

“O-okay,” you mumble. You aren’t sure if you believe her. You don’t think you believe anything anymore.

The healers push her away, you’re so so tired, and she stands up, dusting off her hands.

“Thank you, Clarisse,” one of the healers says. “We’ll take it from here.”

Clarisse.

—-

The purpose of Clarisse La Rue’s entire existence seems to be to drive you insane.

The way her arms flex when she wields her spear, the way she lifts her shirt up to dab at sweat on her brow; and the way you can see her toned stomach and the faintest hint of abs you would actually kill to touch. The way she smiles, even though it’s never really genuine, and the way she laughs when she’s making fun of someone.

She was the first person you met at camp, and you’re pretty sure she doesn’t even remember it, yet alone know your name.

It was ironic, as the daughter of Aphrodite, to be quietly pining over someone from the distance. And it sucked, but maybe you would just always have this quiet crush on Clarisse, and you learned to take it like you took your breakfast.

Until the start of this summer, when everyone came back to camp, it was alive again, and it all changed. And now you’re fucked.

—-

You smile, watching a few of the younger campers scream about how amazing the lake is. Summer’s just started. It’s so beautiful this time of year. They didn’t have as traumatic experiences as you, no monsters chased them right up to the barrier of camp. The lake is huge and so blue it seems otherworldly- probably because it is.

You slam into something.

It’s an awkward flare of limbs and muttered obscenities, but you manage to keep yourself upright by falling back into a very convenient tree.

“Sorry,” you say, looking up and expecting to make eye contact with anyone but her.

You haven’t been face to face with Clarisse in four years. You mouth snaps shut, and you’re sure you look like a terrified deer in headlights.

She’s frozen just like you.

“W-watch where you’re going,” she hisses, pushing you farther into the tree as she walks past you.

Did Clarisse just stutter?

—-

Clarisse stares at you.

You blush like you’re about to turn into a flamingo.

The cycle repeats.

—-

This year, the Ares and Aphrodite cabins were paired together to share the field for sword practice just before dinner. The sun is hidden by the trees, providing some nice shade as you frown at all the Ares kids sparring like their lives depend on it.

While Aphrodite kids are not the most naturally skilled in fighting, you’re still demigods, and you still have to know how to protect yourselves.

Matty, a Ares child and your sister Tyla’s boyfriend, already sparred three times, winning against his siblings, then sparred with Tyla once; which just ended with her getting bored after a minute and dropping her sword before jumping into his arms.

You watch random people spar. Everyone moves around you, Tyla and Matty are on top of each other next to you on the bench, everyone walks around you to collect their water bottles from the table behind you.

“Aren’t you gonna spar, Y/N?” Tyla asks, fiddling with Matty’s hands.

“No,” you laugh.

“That’s against the rules.”

You know that voice, you hear that annoyingly angelic voice in your dreams.

Clarisse sits down next to you. You can hear Tyla smiling. Only a few of your siblings who can be trusted to keep a secret know about your wretched crush. You’re probably blushing.

“Uh, what?” you say, looking in her direction but not risking actually looking at her.

“You have to spar,” she says, like it’s painfully obvious, kicking out her legs.

“I’ll do it tomorrow,” you shrug.

“Sounds like you’re scared, Y/N,” Matty muses.

You shoot him a bored look. “Sounds like you’re whipped, Matty.”

Tyla is currently in Matty’s lap, her hands in his hair.

“Oh, definitely,” he says, turning towards Tyla with a sweet smile on his face and she coos and immediately attaches her face to his.

“Oh, Gods,” you mutter, turning away from the two of them having borderline sex on the bench.

Clarisse laughs.

You clench your fist, you feel like you’re gonna explode being so close to her and not able to climb up into her lap and kiss her like a woman starved.

“You still have to spar, you know.”

“Are you going to tell on me?”

“Hm, no. I won’t have to.”

You finally look towards her, if only because you’re confused, but she’s looking straight out at the the distance, where a certain centaur is making his way to the fields-

“Oh, fuck,” you hiss, immediately jumping up and scrambling for a sword from the pile behind you.

You turn around, hoping one of your siblings is free so you can spar with them-

The sword is ripped out of your hands.

“That one sucks,” Clarisse says, simply, while you stand there with your mouth open. She rifles through the swords. “Use this one instead.”

The one she hands you does seem a lot easier to hold. Not too heavy, not too light.

How the hell could she tell which one is best for you just by looking at you?

“Matty,” Clarisse says. “Chiron’s coming.”

Tyla and Matty both hop up, giggling at they make their way towards one of the marked circles.

As you’re left there with Clarisse, it suddenly hits you that after four years of simple indifference, she’s talking to you like she knows you. Or like she wants to know you.

You like her too much to question it. You want her too much to be bothered as to why she’s giving you five minutes of her time.

Clarisse walks away. You thought it was going to happen, so your heart feels this sort of heavy that is indescribable, but she turns around.

“Are you coming?” she asks, deadpan.

“Oh. Uh, yeah,” you say, sticking your sword under your arm and cracking your knuckles. With Chiron showing up, she leads you to the marked circle all the way at the edge of the field, the start of the woods, the very last one.

She stops and turns around, this sort of nonchalant but smug look on her face. She reaches forward and bats your hands away from each other with a single swat that leaves you so shocked from the feeling of her skin on hers that your hands fall to your sides.

“Stop that. You’ll hurt ‘em.”

Here, right in front of the trees, the sun shining through the gaps shines off of Clarisse’s tan skin and her bronze armor in a way that makes her look otherworldly.

Clarisse’s that kind of pretty where you just never want to stop staring at her. The kind of pretty where you just want to fade into her and be next to her; the kind of pretty where nothing compares to her but it just watches her too.

Like the sun behind her, it isn’t jealous, it just admires her and shines off her skin.

She’s smirking at you, her knees bending into an offensive position, her spear pointing at you.

“He’s watching,” she taunts, and you’re really not in the mood for a lecture and the loss of dessert privileges, so you copy her.

“I’m not the best-”

She spins forward, spear arcing toward you. You yelp, raising your sword up to block her spear. They slam together.

“You’ll do fine,” she smiles, so smug in a way that makes you want to slap her and kiss her all at once.

“Whatever,” you mumble as she pulls back.

But you feel a little more confident with her praise, launching a surprise attack. She seems a little shocked, but she blocks it, probably a bit closer than normal.

“Feisty,” she murmurs.

“What the hell does that even mean?”

She launches her own attack, more force behind it this time, and it’s harder to stop her, but you do, you push her back.

“It means you’re exactly like I thought you were.”

You frown, because what is she even saying, but she launches another attack, smiling brightly as you block it, her eyes never leaving your form.

It’s a blurry of your heartbeat in your ears, her smile, the clash of her spear and your sword, the rest of the field coming to life with the sound of metal on metal, wins and losses.

Your arm is growing heavy.

But you keep your eyes open, blocking her attacks and waiting for an opening you’re not sure will ever come.

Finally, she reveals her side, and you swing, your sword clanging as it hits her metal armor.

She looks down at your sword and then you.

When she looks up again, it’s never the same.

—-

“Did you let me win that first day?”

You’re in the woods with her, so many months after that first day, and it all still feels like it was yesterday. You’re laying on a blanket on the soft grass, facing each other, limbs tangled together and her arm around you.

“Hm?” she says, slightly sleepy.

“When we sparred?”

“Oh,” she smiles, yawns. “Yeah, I let you win.”

You gasp and hit her arm.

“Clar, that’s, like, horrible. Our relationship was built on lies.”

You’re the only person allowed to call her that.

She frowns. “It wasn’t. What are you talking about?”

“I was gloating over you for months, and you let me-”

“Okay, but, you still won. I just helped you a bit. That’s what a good girlfriend should do.”

“You were not my girlfriend then.”

“Yeah, but you wanted me to be. For how long? Four years?”

You roll yours eyes. “You bumped into me once and then became obsessed with me.”

She smiles against you as she kisses your forehead.

“Who wouldn’t?” she snorts. “Not my fault you bumped into me in a way no one else ever has, angel.”

“My love language is just bumping into people, I think.”

“Then you can’t bump into anybody but me. Or else I’d kill them, probably.”

“A true romantic.”

She wraps her arms around you, muscles flexing as she pulls you on top of her.

“Only for you, angel,” she says, eyes falling closed again. “‘M cold, be my blanket.”

“Aren’t you supposed to be all rough and tough?”

“Can’t be with you,” she yawns. “Love you too much. Now shush. I’m gonna fall asleep.”

“You big baby,” you mumble. “Big bad Clarisse needs to fall asleep with her girlfriend and get her full eight hours or else she’ll go on a rampage.”

“Damn right.”

Clarisse is the type of pretty that just makes you wanna fade into her. And you do, in the light of the rising moon, the light of the fading sun. You fade into her.

—-

y/n when clarisse helps her on her first day: wow, an angel 😍😍

clarisse when y/n bumps into her: wow, an angel 😍😍

ALSO CLARISSE CALLING Y/N ANGEL???? I THINK I’VE FOUND MY NEW OBSESSION Y’ALL

—-

taglist:

@lvrue @t-wylia @laughingcheese037 @kroumi @urdeadpoet @colezb @rey26 @harmzilla @elliewilliamsbae @amberfreemansburntface @kyuupidwrites @neverwaakeme-up @shark1008 @liballer @heyimadison @nvirskies

[falafelluva]

I love your work so much!

I don’t know if you take requests but if you do can you write something with Kenan who has to do his 2 year old daughter’s curly hair? 🫶🏾

; 𝐓𝐀𝐍𝐆𝐋𝐄𝐃 ���𝐔𝐑𝐋𝐒 - 𝘬.𝘺𝘪𝘭𝘥𝘪𝘻 ✮

summary: when a nasty cold hits you, kenan is left in charge of the parenting duties— that includes taking care of your little girls wild curls.

warnings: idk, illness ig? help? tangled curly hair (very triggering)

author’s note: i do in fact take requests for now I can still write them quickly but after this week i have to focus on school bc #examyear, i love this one cs i have curly hair myself but excuse the way this is written- i myself have a mixture that ranges between 3a-3c and kind of went with what i know about my hair even tho i don’t know shizzle about curly hair care💔 also i just named her Ayla bc I don’t know how to write with those y/d/n things [sad]

The afternoon sun streamed through the curtains, casting a warm glow across the room. You lay in bed, bundled under a soft blanket, battling a nasty cold.

Your head throbbed, and your throat felt like sandpaper, leaving you utterly drained. You could hear the soft sounds of your two-year-old daughter, Ayla, playing in the living room, her laughter breaking through your fog of illness, but you knew you wouldn’t be able to join her anytime soon.

Kenan stepped into the room, his expression a mix of concern and determination. “Hey, love,” he said softly, checking in on you. “How are you feeling?”

You managed a weak smile. “Not great, but I’ll be okay. Just tired.”

He nodded, glancing toward the living room where Ayla was happily babbling to herself. “I have to take her out for a bit, but I don’t know what to do with her hair.”

You chuckled softly, even though it hurt. “She’ll be fine, just leave it for now.”

But Kenan shook his head, his brows furrowing. “Nein, I can’t let her go out like that.” He paused, then added, “Besides, she needs to look..not this uh… wild? people will think I don’t know what I’m doing.”

You watched him, a mix of admiration and amusement. Kenan had always been determined to be an involved dad, but when it came to Ayla’s hair, he was a bit out of his element.

“Okay, just give it a try. You can do this.”

Taking a deep breath, Kenan nodded and headed to the bathroom to gather supplies. He emerged with a small basket filled with the essentials:

an edge brush, edge control, gel, water, curling cream products, and a random wide tooth comb/denman brush. You couldn’t help but smile at how determined he looked.

“Alright, Ayla, come here, Kleine” he called out, trying to keep his voice light and playful. Ayla wandered over, her beautiful but wild curls bouncing with every step. (little one)

Kenan knelt in front of her, brushing his fingers through her hair to assess the situation.

“Alright, let’s see what we’re working with here,” he said, his tone serious as he misted her hair with water from the spray bottle.

Ayla giggled as the droplets landed on her forehead, but then she wrinkled her nose, unsure of what was happening.

“Easy, it’s just water..damn,” Kenan said softly, his tone soothing as he muttered the last word.

“We’re just going to make you look pretty.” He squirted some curly hair product into his hands, rubbing them together before working it through Ayla’s curls.

“This will help keep your hair nice and bouncy, just like how mommy does it for you” he explained, trying to channel the routine he’d always seen you do.

Next, he picked up the Denman brush, the brush glinting in the light. But as he began to gently brush through her curls, Ayla’s mood shifted.

“No, Baba! No!” she whined, shaking her head and pulling away from him.

Kenan paused, glancing at you with wide eyes. “Was mache ich falsch?” he muttered in confusion, clearly at a loss. (what am I doing wrong?)

“It’s okay, just take it slow. Maybe try using your fingers instead,” you suggested, wanting to help him navigate the moment without adding to his frustration.

“Okay, okay,” he replied, his voice still calm but edged with uncertainty. He set down the Denman brush and began to use his fingers to separate her curls gently.

With each careful tug, he began to see the way her curls twisted and spiraled, their natural shape coming to life.

“See, we can do this,” he encouraged, but Ayla still squirmed in his grip, her little face pouting.

“it’s just a little bit of..hair care,” he said, trying to keep his voice cheerful. “You’ll look even more like a princess when we’re done.”

“Baba, no!” Ayla whined again, crossing her arms defiantly.

“Ach, digga,” he murmured, trying to keep the mood light. “We can go get ice cream after this, I promise.” (oh, bro)

Her little face lit up at the mention of ice cream, but she still squirmed, trying to pull away.

Kenan watched her, biting his lip, and then he grabbed the edge brush, hoping it might give him better control over the styling process.

“Okay, let’s try something else,” he said, taking a deep breath. He gently brushed back the front curls to smooth them down and began working on her edges.

He carefully applied a small amount of edge control with his fingers, rubbing it into the baby hairs around her hairline.

“There we go,” he said, concentrating hard. He picked up the edge brush, using it to create little swoops and curves that framed her face—Ayla giggled, her curiosity piqued by the new sensation, and for a moment, the tension eased.

“Pretty, Baba?” she asked, tilting her head to the side, and Kenan felt a surge of pride.

“Very pretty,” he confirmed, a smile spreading across his face. “You’re going to be the cutest girl at the park.”

Encouraged, he continued to work on her edges, and as he styled, he found his rhythm. “See? Isn’t this fun?” he said, still maintaining the cheerful tone he knew she loved.

“Fun!” she echoed, her little hands now playing with the edge brush while he worked.

“Just a little more,” he said, carefully applying some gel to set the style in place. He lightly spritzed her hair with water again, letting the curls bounce back into their shape—with his fingers, he fluffed the curls, giving them definition and volume.

“Baba, I want to help!” Ayla exclaimed, reaching for the brush again.

“Okay, okay,” Kenan said, chuckling at her enthusiasm.

He let her take the brush, guiding her little hands to help. “Just like this, we go from the bottom to the top. Can you do that?”

Ayla nodded, her focus entirely on the task. As she brushed through her curls, Kenan felt a wave of warmth wash over him.

It wasn’t just about getting her hair done; it was about sharing this moment together.

As they both worked on Ayla’s hair, Kenan quietly reminded himself that he was doing this for her. “Wir schaffen das zusammen,” he whispered under his breath, his determination shining through. (We can do it together)

After a few more minutes of playful styling, Kenan finally finished. He leaned back, taking in the sight of his daughter’s beautifully styled curls. “There you go, all done!” he exclaimed.

Ayla turned to look in the mirror, her eyes wide with excitement. “Pretty!” she exclaimed, running her fingers through her curls.

Kenan grinned, relief flooding through him. “You look like a little princess, just like I promised.”

“Baba, I want to go!” she said, tugging at his hand, eager to head out.

“Alright, ice cream it is!” he laughed, ruffling her hair one last time before they headed toward the door.

As they stepped into the bright sunlight, you settled back into your pillows, content in the knowledge that your little family was navigating life together— Kenan pointing at you through the window, the two of them waving at you as you blow a kiss at them.

Watching Kenan hold Ayla’s hand outside, you couldn’t help but smile.

Even though you were feeling under the weather, knowing that Kenan was trying to up his game as a dad made your heart swell with pride.

The way he approached parenting, with such tenderness and determination, filled you with gratitude.

You closed your eyes for a moment, thankful for the life you were building together, one day at a time.

[catastrophicdisasters]

alright i need to ramble abt TUA s4 somewhere that isn't at someone who doesn't care lmao

putting it under a see more bc a lot of it is based on stuff that's been said in the recent cast interviews and could definitely be considered spoilers

tl;dr: a theory post about who, if anyone, i think is going to die this season (and why, ranked by how narratively coherent i think their death would be, and how it would - or wouldn't - round off their character arc)

emphasis on the "i think", as obviously this is my opinion on what i think would make a satisfying narrative

so, in one of the interviews from today, Robert is asked how he feels about the "kind of sacrifice" at the end of the story, and his response is "yeah there's a kind of death that happens" and to then wax philosophical about physical death vs the kind of death that happens when the memory or the person is gone, and how there's a "kind of passing that happens"

and like, most people are convinced that someone's going to die by the end of the season, myself included, but i've just had another idea Robert really talked AROUND the word death, saying "a kind of death" and "a passing", and with him talking about that 'do you die when you physically die or when nobody alive can remember you' style thing, I'm thinking that maybe someone gets themselves erased from the timelines

so they still EXIST, as theyre not physically dead, but because nobody can remember them, it's still a kind of death (exactly like Robert said)

whether or not that person retains their memories is kind of irrelevant, though them keeping them does make for a more tragically satisfying arc - they gave up their existence to keep their family safe/save the world, and yet none of them will ever look at them with recognition or love again, and will never truly know just what they did for them. i think that could be done really well, as there's a special kind of beauty in a character who is happy to accept their own end in order to protect those they love (also, if i wanted to get super analytical of that, i could draw parallels between that idea and the trailer's choice of song - The End; the opening song of The Black Parade album, the funeral song that kicks off the narrative album with themes such as the life that comes after death-)

~

now, with that said, i want to go off about who my top choices for death/erasure actually are:

well, first i want to say who i don't think it's going to be, and that's Diego and Lila. and that is because they've set up this little family arc for them via Lila's pregnancy, and right from ep1 it was established that Diego was the most attached to Grace - his mother figure - highlighting the importance of the parental figure in his life. both of them have a strong sense of detachment and independence / not needing anyone else, while actually longing to be part of something, to have a family unit. so with the two of them now being married and having a child together, especially given what Ritu said in an article - that "they are not really communicating and are snapping at each other" - it sets up the perfect arc for them to find their place, together, and forging the family dynamic they both so clearly want.

I could talk more about them (i.e, Diego having multiple instances that make reference to his desire to prove himself to his father, vs Lila collapsing post s2 because she just wanted to know if The Handler - if her mother - ever really loved her), but that's not the point of this post

so working backwards from who i think is least likely (and why, obviously):

Viktor:

- originally i had a big question mark over Viktor, bc ive always kind of struggled to pick up the threads of his arc, but even then i still don't think that death/sacrifice would be narratively satisfying for him? is it possible that he sacrifices himself to save his family? i mean… i guess? he's always been more passive and less confrontational than the others, so even if the opportunity presented itself i feel like someone else would probably beat him to the punch

- BUT, that's still not actually the reason i think it won't be him - it's because i think a more satisfying ending for him would be for him to have everything he was denied in childhood. with him coming out, they've set themselves up really nicely to push an ending for Viktor that has him finding himself, understanding himself, and finally being happy with himself. whether he ends up keeping and accepting his powers or not makes no odds as long as HE makes that choice for himself! let him be surrounded by family/people who love him for who he is, let him choose to live for himself and be happy!

Allison:

- i have a similar problem with Allison that i have with Viktor, in that i don't really know where her arc is going, at least as far as the Hargreeves are concerned. Allison's been pretty clear that her priority is her daughter, getting back to her daughter, protecting her daughter. and now she has her back. and she even has Ray back!

- i've never reeeeally been a fan of redemption through death (though there are exceptions), so the thought of her being the one to die/sacrifice herself to save the rest of the Hargreeves just… doesn't sit right with me. particularly because i'm also fairly sure i read somewhere that Emmy said that Allison is kind of "done" with the Umbrella Academy family stuff, and that she's all about being a mother again, which brings me to my next point;

- Allison dying would actually have more of an emotional impact on Claire and Ray than it would to any of the Umbrellas. and, as nice as Ray is and I'm sure Claire will be, they are not the major characters in this show. they are not the ones we have spent three seasons connecting and sympathizing with. would her death still have impact? of course! but i think that there's too much to resolve (such as the events of s3, the fact that she already feels done with them all) to make her death be tragic and satisfying, and to still wrap up everyone else's arcs and the story as a whole

- her finding a way to accept and love her Umbrella family instead of constantly trying to distance herself from them, and learning to balance the family of herself, Ray, and Claire, with her family within the Umbrellas feels like it would be more satisfying for her than sacrificing herself to save the Umbrellas / the world

- could she still end up sacrificing herself to save Ray/Claire, and that in turn leads to someone else dying? yes, absolutely! or something happens to Claire and she no longers cares about living because she can't lose her daughter again? also yes, but that feels a bit... too dark, even for tua

Klaus:

- i feel a little controversial, putting him so far down the list (he's still placed fourth out of eight, though), but the thing is - with his powers back, he is functionally immortal. at that point, the only way he's dying is if he chooses to die. which could still lead to a satisfying end!! the boy who was scared of the ghosts he saw, who became scared of dying, becoming the man who chooses to die? very tasty potential, there. contrasts very nicely with the fact that he kept bringing himself back to life without even realising

- buuuut, that would conflict with what we've heard so far about Klaus's storyline this season; Klaus becoming a scared-of-everything germaphobe, having to learn "how not to be scared of life", falling back into addiction, and learning new aspects of his powers. i don't really see how all of that would lean into a storyline of him accepting death, ya know? it's a lot to do, with not a lot of time to do it well

- i will say, though, that i do love the idea of him somehow finding Dave in the afterlife, and that being part of helping him to accept death - that he can be reunited with the love of his life (this falls apart, however, when you realise that Dave's actor isn't currently credited for any episodes on imdb. still doesn't mean that he won't be, but... makes it less likely)

Luther:

- i genuinely debated with myself about who gets third slot between Luther and Five, but ultimately decided on Luther (which i'll further explain during Five's section)

- Luther literally has no purpose outside of the Umbrella Academy. in s1, he was defined by his being the only 'true' remaining member of the Academy, and having been sent to the moon for a seemingly pointless mission (and even though we now know that he was sent there to protect Abigail - she's alive now, so that doesn't really need revisting). s2 also had him at a loose end - he was fighting simply because that's all he thought he was good at, he tried to give his relationship with Allison another go once he realised she was alive, only for it to turn out that she's married, and then he was a (frankly, terrible) spotter for Five during the paradox psychosis fiasco. s3 literally had him get kidnapped by the Sparrows without anyone really noticing, and although he did eventual fall in love and gett married to Sloane, she vanished with the resetting of the universe. Sloane, incidentally, also doesn't have her actor listed on imdb as returning for s4

- he doesn't really have a multi-season arc to finish off; in fact, the only consistent facet of his personality is his desire to protect his family and 'do the right thing', whatever that might be

- i feel like for him, a good arc to send him on would be him becoming comfortable in his gorilla-body and maturing into the confident leader that would be expected of a "Number One". but, given the way his character has evolved (or devolved) through the series so far, i don't really see them doing that

- in fact, i think it's much more likely that they kill him simply because they don't know what else to do with him. which, ya know, kind of sucks

- HOWEVER, i do think there is good potential in having the first major leader-like decision that Luther makes - free from the influence of others - being to sacrifice himself to save his family. the one time he stands up and says "no, i've made my decision, and it's time for you all to respect that" while also tying it back to his overwhelming desire to love and protect his family? oh yeah, that'd be some good shit right there

Five:

- my god please just let the old man rest

- so, i think Five is less likely to flat out die than Luther is, but i do think some kind of timeline fuckery is much more likely where Five is concerned

- considering what Adian has already said about Five's arc this season

- "He doesn’t know what his place is in the universe. When he goes on this emotional arc with Lila, for the first time, he feels there is a reason for living." - i honestly think killing him would be an incredibly shitty thing to do. having him finally, finally, find his place in the universe, after getting stuck in the apocalypse at THIRTEEN, where he finds his entire family dead, proceeds to then spend 40 years alone, trying to get back to his family, before being picked up by the Temps, turned into a killer, finally getting back to his family, only to end up stuck back in his teenage body AND having to deal with three weeks of constant apocalypses, to then kill him???? jesus christ that would SUCK. like, i'm aware i have bias because Five is one of my favourites and i think his arc has some insane narrative potential, but i cannot be the only one thinking that if they kill him after all of that it's just going to leave a bitter taste?

- THAT SAID!! that said, i do think that it's likely that he would be the one that ends up getting erased from various timelines in order to save his family

- his whole thing has been about getting back to his family to save them from the apocalypse - to have him find his ultimate purpose being to do exactly that? it makes sense!

- in erasing himself from this timeline in order to save it, his purpose also then becomes founding the Temps Commission, with the intention of preserving the new main timeline that he literally 'died' to create and protect (and considering that they technically exist outside of the timeline, who is to say this isn't all part of Commission Founder Five's master plan anyway? hell, given that the Commission resides in the year 1955, he can go play guitar with Marty McFly and bitch about the perils of time travel while he's there)

- it would also solve the awkward elephant in the room; the fact that as of s4 he looks 18 but is actually in his 60s. he can erase himself from the main timeline, putting himself back into his old man body, and retire in peace knowing he's successfully saved his family and given them a future by also saving the world

- it's so deliciously tragic

Ben:

- oh god okay here we go

- i adore Ben and don't really want him to die, but i'd be lying if i said that his death wouldn't be incredibly satisfying, in the way only a true tragedy can be

- we all know this season is going to be focused on him and how he is going to be the one to cause the apocalypse this time, so it ending with him would make sense

- Blackman (the showrunner) has also said that he "wanted to come full circle with the family relationship". what is the FIRST thing we know about Ben? he's dead

- for the first two seasons, he haunts the narrative in a literal sense by being a ghost that only Klaus can see and so still sort of interacting with things, but considering we don't yet know what the Jennifer Incident is and how it actually affected the Umbrellas moving forwards, it could turn out that he has also been actually haunting the narrative - he's dead but so much has been driven by the nature of his death

- i also just really love the idea that the first thing we learn about Ben is that he's dead, and that also ends up being the last thing we learn about him

- taking it a step further, given that the Ben in the recap was definitely Sparrow Ben, it would be disgustingly, delightfully tragic for the final fate of Sparrow Ben to be the same as that of Umbrella Ben - that nothing any of them did actually mattered, because in the end, Ben was always going to die (can you tell i like a good tragedy)

- also, going far too deep into it (to the point that this isn't so much evidence that Ben is the most likely to die, but just a nice little tie in), parts of Ben's arc very much tie into the narrative of The Black Parade. you know, the MCR album that the song they used in the official trailer came from. The Black Parade, as an album, opens with a funeral song (just like the show opened with a funeral) and then continues to go over The Patient's life after death, the experiences from the afterlife, and even reflecting back on his life. quite fitting for Ben, in a way

- ANYWAY! Sparrow Ben also spent a good chunk of his time in s3 desperately wanting to be part of the Umbrellas, but having no idea how to go about it. the thought of him sharing the fate of Umbrella Ben and therefore becoming just like him, becoming Umbrella Ben? poetic

- there is also my sort-of half-theory, that the reason Ben is being overloaded with the Marigold is that he's actually somehow channeling both versions of Ben, so has twice the amount he should have, thereby destabilising him in some way, and one of the Bens needs to die. but, that doesn't really tie into Jennifer in any way, because that wouldn't have happened in the original/main timeline

- Ben is also the only character to have actually existed as multiple versions of himself in the two timelines - again, it is a perfect tragedy for him to die in both of them. maybe this time they save him from the Jennifer Incident, only for him to choose to sacrifice himself to save them all. ergo, it didn't matter, it didn't matter, he was always going to die

- i really like a well executed tragedy, okay? i also feel like it's one of the few satisfying ways to successfully kill off a character. still hurts like a bitch, but at least it was worth something

~

okay well, this got sufficiently away from me! kudos to you if you read the whole way through, and i do not blame you in the slightest if you skipped through lmao i also probably missed a few things, and maybe got a few things wrong so uh, whoops on that

tl;dr: probably won't die: Diego, Lila unlikely to die, but possible: Allison, Viktor wouldn't surprise me if they died: Klaus, Luther probably won't die, but might end up erased from the main timeline: Five most likely to die (and would be beautifully tragic): Ben

again again - purely my opinion!! and also what i'd like to see, based on what i personally feel can make a good narrative!

good luck for the 8th brellies <3

[moose-muffin]

im new here (hiya from the hazbin tag lol) but if you do character + character requests than please PLEASE gimmie a lee!vox with ler!alastor 🙏🙏🙏hear me out... the two are fighting and al (sHocKINglY) wins out, and vox expects to like.. be beaten into the ground as a result, but nope!! he gets tickled!!! to tears!!!! smthn smthn he wasnt smilin and, yk, youre never fully dressed w/o a smile!!!

/nf to do tho ty for reading!!! <3<3

OMG OMG HELLO WELCOME I HOPE YOURE DOING GOOD YIPPEE

SO FUN FACT I WAS VERY LIKE NEUTRAL TO RADIOSTATIC BUT TONIGHT HAS BEEN (HAHAH GET IT) AN ADVENTURE AND THIS ROAD HAS BEEN SUCH A BLAST <3 THOSE TWO FUCKERS ARE SO INSTIGATIVE ITS CRAZY.

I KNOWWWW THIS AS A FIC WOULD GO C R A Z Y!!!!! IDK IF ANYONE HERE WRITE FOR VOX AND ALASTOR AND PERHAPS DOES COMMISSIONS BUT I WILL PAY!!!! PLEASE HIT ME UP OR ILL PROBABLY GO TAKE A PEAK FOR MYSELF TMR <3 AS LONG AS THATS OK ANON. (I WILL ABSOLUTELY LET IT BE POSTED AS LONG AS THE AUTHOR IS OK WITH IT WHICH USUALLY THEY ARE!!!!) IM GONNA TAKE SOME CREATIVE LIBERTIES AS I TYPICALLY DO HEADCANONS!

IM NOT USUALLY A CHARACTER + CHARACTER GIRLY SO BEAR WITH ME BUT I WILL DO MY VERY BEST!!!! HOPEFULLY I CAN DO THIS JUSTICE! IT WILL BE RANDOM HCS THAT ARE UNRELATED TOO. MY BRAIN IS A MESSY PLACE HWBSHWDBD

OK SO LIKE I KINDA MENTIONED, THEY BOTH LOOOOVE TO JUST GET UNDER PEOPLES SKIN. LOVE IT!!! ESPECIALLY ALASTOR. HES SUCH AN ASS (affectionate)

I’D EVEN SAY HE’S KIND OF AN INSTIGATIVE LER???? BRO IS DOING EVERYTHING IN HIS POWER TO GET TO TICKLE VOX LIKEEE IDK IF THAT EVEN MAKES SENSE BUT I KNOW ITS TRUE. HE WILL CASUALLY WIGGLE HIS FINGERS IN CONVERSATION, TWEAK HIS RIBS FROM BEHIND, LITTLE THINGS LIKE THAT. WELL THEYRE NOT LITTLE. ESPECIALLY NOT TO VOX WHO IS SO FLUSTERED BY IT… ITS THE MOST BEAUTIFUL THING

BUT! VOX HAS STARTED TO FIGURE IT OUT. AS HE IS ALSO ONE WHO LOVEEES TO GET UNDER SKIN, HE DECIDES HE’LL DO EVERYTHING TO TRIGGER A LER MOOD IN ALASTOR. IF HE CAN TELL HE ALREADY HAS ONE, HE FINDS WAYS TO SUBTLY (WE ALL KNOW HE ISNT SUBTLE THOUGH) LEAVE A SPOT UNPROTECTED. BUT ALASTOR DOESNT WANT TO GIVE HIM THE SATISFACTION!!! HE TRIES SO HARD TO NOT GIVE IN TO VOX BC HE “WANTED TO BE THE ONE IN CONTROL” AND NOW HE ISNT AND HES #PISSED

ALSO VOX ABSOLUTELY IS HORRIFIED OF VULNERABILITY. YET HE IS ABLE TO MOVE PAST IT WITH ALASTOR HERE. SOMEHOW HE ISNT AS WORRIED ANYMORE. MAYBE HE KNOWS ALASTOR WILL REACT. HE LOVES THAT SO VERY MUCH.

AS FOR THE SPECIFIC PROMPT, OH THAT IS SO REAL!!!! ABSOLUTELY YES!!!

I DONT WRITE GOOD ROMANCE BUT LIKE UGH IMAGINE IT NOW. Alastor definitely just got himself to the V’s tower and was planning on fucking with Vox only to see he had already been kinda pissed off. Alastor wouldn’t be as satisfied if he knew he didn’t cause the frustration. He realized he could just stir the pot again. Problem solved, and what better way to solve it than using his weakness against him.. being tickled.

I’m being a little silly but genuinely Vox is so ticklish. Like most ticklish person in hell would go to him if it were an official title. That’s what I’m thinking. That being said, Alastor also knows how quickly he could get him to crumble… but wouldn’t it be more fun to take it slow.

Vox notices his presence almost immediately. He tried to ignore it as he feels his face get warm. He can’t fuck this up. He takes a deep breath and turns around. “Why hello, Alastor! What brings you to our building this evening?” He said in a semi newcaster voice. He wasn’t ready to drop the act

“Well Vox, I came here for a reason of my own but then I walked by your office and you looked so sad!” He began to walk closer to Vox. “You know, t they say you’re never fully dressed without a smile!”

Vox let out a laugh that was quite clearly untruthful. “Yes Alastor I am aware! I was alone in here and so I figured I’d just save up some energy. I’m sure you understand.”

“Quite frankly I don’t,” Alastor paused, “I think maybe I could help you get that smile back.”

Vox didn’t even have to think. He knew Alastor meant he was going to tickle him. You could ask Velvette. She’s seen those two in tickle fights that lasted for DAYS. she knows what they’re capable of, or more so what Alastor is capable of.

Vox puts up a fight for maybe a couple seconds but he just loves tickles more than he can play pretend that he doesn’t <3

It works out well for them both, Alastor gets to fuck around with Vox and well, Vox gets his shit rocked!!! And he loves that more than a lot of things.

OK IM GONNA CUT IT OFF HERE BUT PLEASE FEEL FREE TO COME BACK!!!! IM ALWAYS DOWN TO HEAR WHAT PEOPLE ARE THINKING!! MAYBE ID DO SOMETHING LIKE THIS AGAIN OR LIKE ADD ONTO THIS!!! BUT I AM JUST ALL OVER THE PLACE CURRENTLY HEHE. I HOPE THESE ARE ENJOYABLE!!! (LOWKEY I WANNA ADD MORE TO THISSSS MAYBE TMR MAYBE TMR WE’LL SEE)

apologies if anything is ooc, i just do this for funsies <3

THANK YOU FOR THIS ASKK

[asecretvice]

hi!! i’m rereading “and this, your living kiss” (for about the sixth time bc i love it so so much), and i’m very curious what your personal opinion is about on the road? you write both opinions of the book so well and i know it’s one of those books that garner very opposite strong opinions. i read the book after reading your fic for the first time and certainly have my own strong opinions. would love to know your thoughts about it!

(and once again thank you for the absolute gift that your fic is, i love it so deeply)

Firstly, thank you so much for your kind words about my writing. It means the world <3

On the Road is a tricky one, isn't it? The short answer is, I do enjoy it. The longer answer includes a "but." And then a couple more.

Just looking at the specs of the book, it's pretty unusual that I should enjoy it--the subject matter is mostly [white] dudes being dudes, it's more or less "literary" fiction, there's just...SO MUCH misogyny, and I'm simply not a big fan of stream of consciousness [or free association, or spontaneous, or whatever you want to call it] prose, because it's difficult to do it both clearly and interestingly. And yet.

The guy does it well. The book is full of energy and passion, ridiculously gorgeous turns of phrase, and for the characters [real people!] he spends the time on, the portraits are so detailed and beautiful and ugly and real. Down to the way he captures their speech patterns!

It's been a little over ten years since I've read it [what is. time.], but I plucked the book off my shelf and was able to find you the exact passage in the first chapter where I decided to trust Kerouac as an author, and allow myself to go with his flow:

They rushed down the street together, digging everything in the early way they had, which later became so much sadder and perceptive and blank. But then they danced down the streets like dingledodies, and I shambled after as I've been doing all my life after people who interest me, because the only people for me are the mad ones, the ones who are mad to live, mad to talk, mad to be saved, desirous of everything at the same time, the ones who never yawn or say a commonplace thing, but burn, burn, burn like fabulous yellow roman candles exploding like spiders across the stars and in the middle you see the blue centerlight pop and everybody goes "Awww!" What did they call such young people in Goethe's Germany?

I mean, this thought starts with another device I tend not to like, the sort of, "If only they'd known, then this wouldn't have happened!" or "Little did they know, it would all end soon" or what have you. But it isn't laid out that way, as a wink or a gotcha. It sets up the dim result, but then gives you the answer without holding your hand about it--you can only burn like that for so long, really. And the nod to "young people in Goethe's Germany," and mentioning the colors blue and yellow, in my view, are an intentional reference to The Sorrows of Young Werther.

The structure is great! This passage is three sentences, the middle one taking up the bulk of it. It's got all sorts of qualities that well-meaning teachers might try to convince you out of, but he's long past that beginner's stage. Read it out loud! It sounds right. The rhythm of this whole section works, with the lead up sentence, the one that flies higher and higher into a climax, and then the short denouement that brings you back down to earth. Not to mention the poetics of it; you could easily split that middle sentence into lines and be wowed by the structure of it:

and I shambled after as I've been doing all my life after people who interest me, because the only people for me are the mad ones, the ones who are mad to live, mad to talk, mad to be saved

Or hell, just say aloud the phrase "candles exploding like spiders across the stars" and delight in the recurring phonemes like /k/, /l/, /d/, /s/, etc.

And you know, maybe that does nothing for you. But I can't imagine that most folks wouldn't at least appreciate the sentiment and how real it feels, how some are in their youth, and then things becoming "so much sadder." Or relate to times when you felt fully mad or overwhelmingly desirous. Or being the person shambling behind, the one ever so slightly on the outside, observing the ones who seem to be truly living their lives to the fullest [Writers' Syndrome(tm)].

So yes, I enjoy the book and I enjoy the pictures Kerouac paints us. It certainly helps that I read this book right around the time I started watching spn. I believe it was probably a month or so after I'd caught up. It was on the docket anyway because I had discovered Ginsberg for myself not very long before I watched the show, and I'd made a point to seek out a few of the beats thereafter. It was rather a synchronous turn of events that helped cement the two things--spn and beat literature--together for me, beyond the movement's heavy influence on Kripke. [If you don't think I have a beats-style spn fic that's been waiting to be written since that time which I've nicknamed Sulfur Sutra then you are sorely mistaken :p ]

Anyway, I did reread the first chapter before writing this post and yeah, the mommy issues and misogyny are in there right away also, and like...okay, that tracks why I recall so well certain moments of the book where I got so frustrated I would be taken out of it and just sit there like

[I hope he felt my eyes. Burning shame into his soul. Like my dude. Really?]

The other part of it is...well...he was in fact describing his version of reality. You don't have to like him on account of it, but I don't doubt for a moment that the guys talked that way, or thought that yes indeed Marylou should go to the kitchen or go sweep the floor or whatever. It takes place in the 40s [not like it doesn't happen all the time today]. Look at it from a more historical/anthropological perspective, if that helps.

Thankfully, there are antidotes to all this. I would highly recommend what I've found to be the best one: Minor Characters by Joyce Johnson. She was part of the beats, and was in a relationship with Kerouac for a couple years. On the Road was reality as he perceived the era; Minor Characters as she perceived it.

In terms of my fic, I agree with and hold both Dean's and Charlie's perspectives simultaneously, as they both come to do after they discuss it with each other and finish the book themselves. The gender politics [and in a few passages, the race politics] are shit, but there's a reason the book has remained popular since its publication, and inspired so many adaptations and other stories. To this day its effects are felt in the American zeitgeist, and for that reason I'm still happy to recommend it to people with the obvious caveats. Besides, as is often the truth in these cases, the book is so much more interesting and beautiful and nuanced than pop culture makes it out to be.

You said you have some strong opinions--feel free to tell me what they are! I'm interested to know ^_^

Thank you again for your kind words, and your ask. I had a lot of fun answering it!

[iconicstoner]

MtF reader who is nervous about bottom surgery, (any depth) and so she starts to wander around the forest to work out the excess energy.

Jasper who's used to them pacing around the forest simply waits for them to go to the same spot they usually do. This time instead of letting them not talk about it he tells them they need to talk about it. Since she's so scared of surgery.

a/n: Okay, so I usually never write for fem readers (bc I’m a guy), but I thought this idea was super sweet. As a queer person myself, I really love the idea of the twilight vampires being accepting of queer people. I hope I did this ask justice, and to any trans people who are worried about hormones or surgery I hope this is comforting to y’all. 

------------------------------------------------------------

comfort 

mtf!reader x jasper hale (fluff)

words: 823

summary: you’ve been nervous about your upcoming bottom surgery for a while now, so Jasper, the concerned lover he is, makes sure to comfort you and talk you through every detail.

Jasper sat atop one of the trees, waiting for any trace of her to alert him. It was no surprise when he smelled her familiar scent before he could even see her. This secluded spot in the forest was where she always went when she was feeling nervous. Jasper looked down to see her, the beautiful girl he’d grown to love so quickly, walking back and forth quickly as she mumbled to herself. Jasper jumped out of the tree, and in an instant, he was next to her.

“You scared me,” she said breathlessly with a red tint covering her face. He could feel her embarrassment, but more than that he could feel her nervousness. 

“You seemed nervous, darlin’,” Jasper replied as he held one of her hands in his. “I wanted to check on you.”

“Don’t worry about it,” she said, brushing him off. “It’s nothing.”

“Seems like somethin’,” he said playfully, trying to lighten the mood. “You know you can tell me anything,” he said softly. She smiled at him and with shaky hands she brushed some of the hair away from his face. She let her hands fall back down to her sides, working up the courage to tell him what was really going on. Unbeknownst to her, Jasper was using his power in an attempt to make her feel calmer.

“I just need comfort, not advice. We don’t have to talk about it,” she assures him. 

“Sweetheart,” he says softly, his southern accent pouring out, “I can comfort you too, but clearly somethin’ has been botherin’ you for days. We need to talk about it or it won’t get any better,” he tells her as gently as possible, trying not to work her up.

“I’m just worried about my surgery,” she says with a sigh, causing Jasper’s eyes to widen in surprise. Soon, she’d be undergoing bottom surgery, and she was so excited about it, but now it was clearly causing her a lot of stress.

“I thought you wanted the surgery?” Jasper asked, looking into her eyes.

“I do,” she responded hurriedly, “it’s just this is a big operation, and something could go wrong, or I might not be happy with the results, or maybe you won’t be happy with the results and-”

“Darlin’, I will love you no matter what,” Jasper said, cutting her anxious rambling off. “It doesn’t matter if you get the surgery, if you don’t, or how it turns out. Despite how much I love your body,” he says lightheartedly, grabbing a hold of her waist, “that’s not why I stay with you. I stay with you for this,” he says, tapping her temple with his index finger. “You have the most beautiful mind I’ve ever encountered in my 160 years.”

“So things will be the same between us even after my surgery?” She asks hopefully.

“Not exactly,” Jasper says, causing her smile to fade. She gives him a concerned look and he quickly elaborates, “there might be some new things I’d like to try in the bedroom,” he says with a wink, causing her whole face to go red.

“Oh knock it off,” she says, playfully pushing his chest away with her hand, causing him to pretend to be shocked, except he can’t stop smiling at her. “You aren’t worried about me getting hurt?” she asks him. “It’s a serious surgery, what if I die?”

“I know for a fact no one has ever died during bottom surgery,” he comforts, leaning in closer to her. “And even if that somehow did happen, Carlisle and I would rush right over to the hospital and turn you. Even death can’t save you from me,” he tells her jokingly, but they both know that Jasper really would do that for her. “Besides, Carlisle has been a surgeon for like a million years, so that should be comforting,” he informs her. She laughs as she places her head on his chest.

“This is comforting,” she responds. 

“Perfect,” he responds, lightly kissing her on the top of the head after. She stays pressed up against his chest, and he begins to gently stroke her hair as they talk out some of the finer details of the surgery. Not only does he provide statistics about the surgery for logical comfort, but he also provides loving, emotional comfort. It’s clear Jasper won’t let anything bad happen to her. He’ll drive her to the hospital, hold her hand as she gets put under anesthesia, and as soon as the surgery is complete he’ll go back to her room and hold her hand while she wakes up. During the recovery process, he vows not to leave her side the entire time, even when she insists he doesn’t have to do that. She’s his whole world now and this surgery is just a small part of their story. Even if it’s scary, she can rest assured knowing nothing bad will happen to her. 

[darkcircles4lyfe]

hi hello ive just come from your enneagram 9 izuku post and i am just OVERWHELMED with joy & excitement after reading it, everything you said just feels so RIGHT!!

(i am a nine myself & have always felt weirdly attached to izuku in that he felt soso similar to me in such a weirdly specific way but i couldn't really explain why i just Got Him until now, so thanks for that little boost of validation lol)

with your post in mind, i couldn't stop thinking about this line from 412 and it got me curious if you had any additional thoughts on it/read it the same way i did:

the moment i read this line i immediately took a screenshot & filed it away in my Important Izuku Moments file, like idk! the wording of it, the way he's talking about shigaraki but could SO easily be talking about himself, that honestly devastating panel of the tears in his eyes...

we've gotten plenty of hints about izuku's emotional suppression (that 'heroes dont cry' scene with iida & todoroki, his flashback of all might telling him to 'stop being such a cry baby' during the afo fight, the whole 'control your heart' plotline...) but THIS line in particular feels so significant for some reason. maybe cause this could easily be izuku recognizing himself in/through shigaraki? maybe bc it is so close to izuku acknowledging the lid hes put on his own sad & lonely past? maybe bc this is the closest we've ever gotten to izuku saying i'm not okay, even if he isn't actually talking about himself yet?

im trying really hard not to ramble too much in your inbox lol, but everything you said in your post about tomura & izuku really hit home for me, i think you're so right about them. and this line in particular is what makes me think we really are going to see some version of tomura being the one to finally break through (Decay) izuku's emotional blocks & barriers (something something locked door imagery), and that just makes me really excited. for both of them :')

YAY!! I’m so glad to hear you resonated with it. It’s otherwise a bit of a “if you know you know” sort of situation, and it felt good to actually explain it.

I had a “!” moment with that panel too, and also when he says he’s determined to break through Tomura’s barrier, expose and acknowledge his pain.

My immediate thought was, “Oh hey, I’m definitely not making this shit up after all, because Horikoshi is obviously intending to confront the concept of bottling up your emotions/your past. He literally just stated it. We're on the same page.” While it didn’t directly confirm anything about Izuku, it's at least something he is aware of, which is an important first step. There's a line in Sleeping At Last's 'Nine' that I was thinking about a lot as I was writing the latter part of that post: "I'm just trying to find myself through someone else's eyes," which speaks to a need for Tomura to be Izuku's mirror, so that he can see himself.

Also, the revelation that Izuku is clinging to the idea that everyone has a "human heart" deep down is pretty clearly applicable to himself too, implying that he's dealing with a lack of self worth (a lot of Japanese fans were talking about this, and I think it doesn't come across as easily in English). I really love how Kudou clarified that Izuku is not naive for this. It's not the same as being blissfully ignorant to how cruel people can be. It's more like, "I need to believe in the worth of others or else I can't believe in myself." That's... so painful and beautiful.

I'm also excited for what comes next! Very soon!

[chaotic-orphan]

I’m not the person you asked the question to, but for your question about Ambroise and Kit and gay subtext, I’d say that there’s certainly something there that I see why people would feel it, but personally I see more of a sibling relationship.

I think that it wouldn’t be weird if the story were to be an enemies to lovers, as the building blocks would be there, but it wouldn’t be weird for it to be an enemies to siblings. It depends on where you choose to take it next.

I see it more as siblings mainly because I’ve always read the story with a large age gap between the two. Ambroise feels significantly older than Kit, an so I never saw it as lovers because of that perspective. But, I don’t think that was ever explicitly mentioned, nor I don’t know if that was ever your intention. So it could’ve been a personal interpretation.

I hoped this helped!

P. S. I really love your writing so much. You’re honestly an incredible writer and your style is so beautiful. I always look forward to reading your work :)

YESSSS @mossy-tables SIBLING RELATIONSHIP👏👏👏 HARD AGREEEEEEEE XD

I see the potential for enemies to lovers too, like it is such a valid direction for the story, esp with that chapter where Ambrose is using his tie to strangle Kit, but my dumbass honestly saw that as the *most* sibling-esque kind of fight [now in hindsight after reading over it again, I see the enemies to lovers thing too] — but debasing Kit like a dog, making him crawl and then going frenzied and just looking at Kit fighting back like: “are you actually this clinically stupid?! Like you have objectively no chance of winning” but does that stop siblings fighting? Never. But I am delighted that some kind of sibling energy shined through a little in the story :D

I also think the age gap between Ambrose and Kit is significant, though I don’t think I ever said it — actually I think I made their age gap quite small which doesn’t make sense because Ambrose has his entire career all sorted out and so does his friends which would make him actually, closer to Jude’s age, around his thirties while Kit is in his early twenties and still trying to figure life out.

P.S. thank you so much for sharing your insights and your too-kind words, I think I may just explode into confetti right now 🎊 genuinely thank you🫶 also!! I amended the age gap bc of you to make it make more sense so thank you🫰

P.P.S Personal familial anecdote — not at all important to the discussion — below cut 😏😏😏 just my personal exp of sibling energy

Now, this could also just be my crazy family, but I feel like we’re normal enough, like when I was a kid I was very energetic and my brother(who was older by like 7 years) would literally just put his hand on my head and push me away and let me tire myself out, but then, what happens when I learned how to evade that move? He SAT on me and still I went to claw at him, bite him, punch him, kick him (this was all in the name of play-wrestling and who was the strongest sibling — which, in hindsight, we had a lot of competitions of who was the strongest, fastest, funniest, smartest, wittiest, favourite sibling contests when we were growing up ((out of sheer boredom (but I blame wii sports for the will to win imbedded within us against each other)) and there is a disbelief of “why the fuck are you still being hyper when you’re clearly not moving until I say you can, idiot?”

Long story short, Mam had to tell my older brother and sister to stop playing with me because they were the ones getting hurt😎 humble brag, don’t mind me, hold your applause

[tangents-within-tangents]

Aspec ✨Icons✨ part 2: Dana Scully (X-files)

(Missed ace week bc I overcomplicated things and it took me a hot sec to finish the sticker but whatever lol)

Listen, Special Agent Dana Catherine Scully is an icon as she is! She's badass, our Women in Stem queen, canonically immortal, and she is totally demi!

Mulder and Scully, the ultimate will-they-won't-they, right? Is it just coworkers respecting boundaries? Friends to lovers? The slowest of slow burns? Idk man listen to this speech:

Scully: Well it seems to me, that the best relationships, the ones that last, are frequently the ones that are rooted in friendship. You know, one day you look at the person and you see something more than you did the night before. Like a switch has been flicked somewhere. And the person who was just a friend is suddenly the only person you can ever imagine yourself with.

Come on, tell me that isn't the most demi thing you've ever heard!

I've seen fans read this as her just realizing or admitting that she has always loved Mulder but that's literally not what she says! And this is in 6.08, so after 6 years of working with Agent Foxy SMulder over here! And then they still don't even kiss until 7.04 and the first time it is implied they had sex is in 7.17 (which can I just say? is also followed directly by a scene of Mulder being heartbroken that Scully isn't interested in his crop circle slideshow, not exactly the peak of their relationship).

(As a demiromantic myself, also relate to this sentiment of "the best relationships." Like yeah we all have our preferences but I've always had this feeling of like a 'I actually understand real love better bc it's not sexual for me' type of a thing, which might be self-aggrandizing, but it's also the complete opposite of the allonormative 'sex is the ultimate goal of a relationship and the deepest act of love' bs)

A few episodes before (6.04) we also have this iconic moment:

Mulder: Hey Scully? Scully: Yes? Mulder: …I love you Scully: Oh brother *sigh*

Another main thing I think of is in season one when we have this whole 'you have to have a life outside of work and obviously that means dating' thing

But then the arc of the episode is that actually that ideal is clearly not her thing

She goes on the date (pretty sure the only one we ever see in the series?) and is bored and uncomfortable and happily leaves to go hunt the Jersey Devil with her loser coworker instead

Also fun fact I learned when researching all this, there was originally a boyfriend character for Scully in the pilot (added by the executives) who was completely cut. And when you look at how the creator talks about it, I think it's clear this ^ episode was a direct response to that

Chris Carter: There was some pressure early on in the development of the show to establish that the characters had personal lives outside of the FBI, and we wanted to see who they were dating, and I felt that was all wrong. I felt the stories needed to drive the characters, and their work needed to drive them. That their work was all-consuming and that they had no personal lives, that this was a quest. A romantic quest, in the literary sense.

And that's def reflected in the writing throughout the whole show lol

Mulder: So Scully, what are you doing tonight, any big plans? Scully: Well seeing as how it’s Friday I was thinking I could get some work in on that monograph I’m writing for the penology review.

Just some beautiful career-driven nerds who find fulfillment in life in other ways!

Which as demonstrated in the above clip, clearly applies to Mulder as well

Mulder: whAT'S a GIRL?

(aka one of my favorite lines lol and for the record he was going to meet his informant for alieum info)

Same episode as Scully's epic demi speech also gives us these gems:

Scully: Dating advice? From whom? Mulder: Yours truly. Scully: … Mulder: Hello? Scully you there? Scully: I heard you… Mulder, when was the last time you went on a date? Mulder: I will talk to you later *hangs up* Scully: The blind leading the blind.

Holman: I’ve been envious of men like you my whole life. Based on your physical bearing I assumed you were more experienced. I mean, you spend everyday with Agent Scully! A beautiful, enchanting woman! You mean you two have never uh…?

(yeah you and every allo fan, buddy)

Mulder: I’m perfectly happy with my friendship with Agent Scully.

So yeah, I'd def say Mulder is somewhere on the aro/ace spectrum too, even if on paper it's in the "obsessed with his work" kinda way. He's a bit more complicated, and I haven't seen the show recently enough to confidently be more specific, but friendly reminder that making dirty jokes and watching p*rn and such are not mutually exclusive with aspec identities (I'd even argue that it's further evidence for rather than against, since the show does specifically include references to p*rn activity, and not actual dating subplots or shots of one-night-stands like others shows would, so he's satisfying those things without someone else (we DON'T talk about that one vampire episode! fr so much of that was OOC I almost dropped the show lol)). And he also falls victim to the, ah... 'SA a man but play it for laughs and like it's his own personal failing somehow' trope ("trust me the man knows how to kiss" ma'am he was literally pushing you away -_-), the one in 'Syzygy' is far worse (link if you wanna subject yourself to it) but also so very ace:

Detective White: So what are you doing at my house? Mulder: I was hoping you could help me solve the mystery of the horny beast. *cuts to Mulder talking to an astrologer about satanic symbols*

Mulder: *panics trying to get her to leave* White: *literally shoves him onto the bed and pins him* maybe we can solve the mystery of the horny beast! Mulder: Maybe we should just watch some television (:

(poor guy just wanted to netflix and chill lit.)

And kinda random but one of my favorite things about Mulder and Scully's relationship is that Mulder so clearly appreciates her intelligence and who she is. Like these moments when he jokingly and respectfully flirts with her come at such specific moments, best demonstrated by this crack edit lol:

(credit to the creator, I just needed the specific clip)

Ignoring Bambi and Sheriff Hartwell la la la la! Except also I mean it can easily be aesthetic attraction, it happens, and neither of those actually went anywhere (Mulder literally sleeps on his couch and uses his bed as a storage room, he wasn't bringing anyone home). They both also have weird exes that show up (tho rarely) but demi means they can totally have had connections with others in the past (and since Scully is still so attached to that guy in 'All Things' after all these years I say it checks out).

(also available in demiro and demiaroace:)

For the record, there are 11 seasons and 2 movies of The X-Files, and while I have watched all of them, that was like 5 years ago (wow I'm old), so I'm not taking responsibility for every single line or scene that ever took place. But the overall vibe is very clear, and random stuff like 'Never Again' or whatever the heck was going on with Fowley (ugggh) are clearly the outliers.

No matter how you frame it, Mulder and Scully's relationship is clearly one based in connection, not attraction. There are actually lines in S1 that indicate both of them see the aesthetic appeal in the other ("I think it's remotely plausible that someone might think you're hot") that prove that's not what it's about for them. It's about mutual respect and admiration. About trust and being there for each other through hardship.

Their relationship is one with years of emotional intimacy before anything physical. I'd even say they dip into QPR territory for a few seasons

And the thing is! It's kinda actually canon. It's literally intentional! It may not be direct representation by name, but honestly now I'm pretty convinced that Chris Carter would have loved to have been aware of these terms/concepts! It may be unwitting, but it is pretty deliberate, which is so evident if you listen to how the creators and actors talk about their relationship in the bts featurettes:

Chris: I was adamant from the beginning that Mulder and Scully should not be romantically involved. (s1)

(this poor man fighting the amatonormativity in media since day one!)

Gillian: Their relationship is platonic and there is so much respect and so much trust and they will risk their lives for each other. (s4)

Sheila Larken: It sounds cliché to say that they're best friends. But they're best friends beyond what lovers could ever be.

Chris: Scully loves Mulder, and Mulder loves Scully. It's a wonderful romance, it's just not a sexual romance, it's not a physical romance. It is a caring, tender, respectful relationship. It's an ideal, I would never want to do anything to threaten it, to change it. (s5)

(oh my gosh do you hear this! ^ I'm not making this up, even Scully would believe me!)

Gillian: Those moments where there is that intimacy, where even just the touch of a hand can be the same as, you know, making love in another series.

They were meant to be platonic and then they slowly and naturally developed into something more (hopefully not just bc of outside pressure but we'll get to that), and for that it's not just your everyday slow burn, but a relationship that is so much more.

Even early on they are allowed to be so openly sweet and affectionate with each other and it's just so chill. In general, the show is just written so different. Like in literally the first episode we have this scene where Scully comes to Mulder's hotel room in the middle of the night and takes off her bathrobe in just her underwear (so Mulder can check the marks on her back) and Mulder does not react at all. He (and the cinematography) is 100% respectful and normal about it, and then is just worried about her. Like how many other shows wouldn't dangle that as bait or make some unfunny comments of like 'man can't control himself' or whatever?

They are allowed to genuinely care about each other and be so tender, to be there for each other without any romantic or sexual implications (for a long long canonical time).

(will never shut up bc this is the sweetest most heart wrenching comfort hug in television history and it's in s2)

(So many more not pictured bc it's like the whole show and you get the idea) And this is a dynamic that continues into their relationship even when it has become romantic (this is the scene for the cuddle moment above and just ahh). And like check out this screen time ratio:

And 4 minutes of the kissing video is actually bts or deleted scenes stuff that wasn't in the show (another fun fact, Gillian and David did an unscripted kiss on the lips in 4.17 that the writers intentionally cut to save for the right moment) and the majority of the on screen kisses are just adorable cheek and forehead kisses (my HEART!)

All this plus the way the show gives these big ol poetic monologues about human nature and the meaning of life (that never have anything to do with sex) all the time. Like in the very least, if you're aspec there's a good chance you'll enjoy watching the show.

Perfect segue @im-a-goddamn-cat because you know what is so funny about all of this? All this amazing ace love? The allos HATE it! They cannot handle it! They cannot fathom that Mulder and Scully were platonic and nothing more for so long. They see all those amazing platonically intimate moments as proof there must be sex. The word "ship" was literally invented for Mulder and Scully. They were the original (and oh boy turns out shipping was implicitly aphobic from the beginning!). Like it's seemingly so universal, it is everywhere:

(spoiler alert, none of those are valid, it literally included their first meeting!)

(like I love you xfiles abridged but...)

Scully's canonical reaction to watching allos' sexualized interpretation of her (horrified):

(It's okay babe, just NEVER go on ao3!)

It's one thing to ship or want them to be together, but it is always about the sex specifically and it so often dips into this aphobia. I swear people treat it like it's a crime that they didn't have sex for so long (or more often/explicitly). Like why bro? Why is that so important to you? Why does love have to equal sex, huh? Why is this the only possible option?

People literally hate Chris Carter for that amazing quote about their romance not being physical! They say he is delusional or doesn't understand his own characters, or was gaslighting fans, just read this article or these ridiculous comments on this reddit post (like reddit is it's own warning but someone even said he "doesn't know how babies are made") Like I may not agree with all of the man's writing choices, but he deserves better than that! Esp since it is clearly intentional and well thought out. He knew what he was doing, it just didn't fit the allotypical standards.

The world just wants them to have sex so bad and us aces are so content.

🖤💜 Mulder and Scully: baffling and frustrating allos since 1993 💜🖤

[shinbine]

I used to be the sabezra shipper back in 2016, when Rebels was airing. Like, I’m the author of several sabezra fanfics, one of which was the reigning #1 in the sabezra tag for awhile. I get it, and I get them.

But I don’t see them for Ahsoka.

Clearly, as a shinbine account, I feel like it’s easy to assume my preference, but literally my account states that I view Sabine as bisexual. I always have, and always will. In my opinion, I feel as though the tension that Sabine and Shin share, has the opportunity to transform into something really beautiful, even if in all my delusions, I don’t think it would happen in canon (but I’m delusional so who knows maybe it will 👀)

I used to analyze Sabezra the same way I analyze Shinbine now. I wouldn’t even be able to be upset if Sabine/Ezra were canon, as ultimately they are Filoni’s characters. If he sets them up that way, it’s his choice. However, I would want a really, really good backstory as to how their relationship ever developed romantically. With Kanan and Hera in Rebels, although their on screen romance might have been more low key, they had comics together—and an entire book. Had Sabine and Ezra maybe had the same (in a very clear way that indicated romance, beyond teenage banter in the first couple of seasons), I think I would feel differently.

It’s not that I don’t want sabezra to happen bc of my concerns for shinbine—I’ve resolved myself to living out my days in delusion, writing shinbine fanfic for the rest of my life. It’s more so that for me to absolutely love a couple like that, I want there to be something more. Something I can grasp, and analyze. Whatever happens, I’ll be content with it if I feel as though the explanation is valid, and I’m very hoping that it will be—shipping or not.

[the-inheritance-games]

POTENTIAL LYRA FANCAST (unofficially)

Ok so I was watching some edits as I do, and all of a sudden I was like “wow she’s really beautiful” “she’s mommy” and then I was like “…. 😨….SHES MOMMY…..SHE COULD BE LYRA!!!”

And ever since I REALLY can’t unsee it, which kinda sucks bc as I’ve stated before I don’t want to set my mind on ANYONE as Lyra until after we get a full description BUT i just REALLY CANT UNSEE IT….

I was talking to @never-enough-novels but she hasn’t responded yet (sorry to shout you out like this lol 😭) and I also don’t think I can keep this to myself so…

This is your ⚠️WARNING⚠️ if you don’t want your perception to be altered and potentially be disappointed if I’m WAYYYY off on this then scroll away

Also if I’m wrong and you are disappointed (which even if I’m wrong I doubt we will be disappointed bc she’s for sure going to be GORGEOUS) you can always blame me for feeding you this idea in the first place, ok. Now without further adieu

I PRESENT MY NON OFFICIAL POTENTIALLY WAY WRONG FANCAST FOR LYRA KANE 🥁🥁🥁🥁

DANIELLE ROSE RUSSELL AKA HOPE MIKAELSON

I know we said no redheads but she’s not ALWAYS a red head 😭

Just tell me that ISNT the SAME STANCE

Also they are both (hopefully potentially) friends with a set of blonde and brunette faternal twins 😭

Idk in my mind it’s just PERFECT I honestly kinda hate myself for even thinking about it bc if I’m totally wrong I might just be a little bit heartbroken because im a huge tvd/to fan (mostly to) and I LOVE Hope Andrea Mikaelson and Danielle rose Russell and like I can clearly picture her being the one to call Grayson demanding answers and calling him an asshole, as well as trauma dumping and also I just see HER being grays endgame too, like I'd even say that I WOULD also describe Danielle as having a voice like honey that's also a bit seductive and husky 😭

Like you don’t understand this potential fan cast is already KILLING ME and I’m sorry if it’s also killing you, so yeah there's that

Let me know what y'all think and again

I'm sorry 😭

[radfemsiren]

what makes me so sad about the recent observations on the beauty standards,pretty privilege & etc. is that women noticed that they were treated horribly for not forcing themselves into insane beauty ideals (such as hairless skin, 'perfectly' thin and curvy body, painfully high heeled shoes, uncomfortably tight clothing) at a YOUNG age, saw so many other women and girls getting bullied for the exact same reasons AND decided that they're going to help women and girls by making them fit into these standards!!

instead of helping each other see that their worth isn't tied to their appearance (and that no amount of bullying can ever changed that) they chose to say "so sad that I had to go through that... but ALL of those ppl were so right to treat me that way bc I didn't respect myself enough to dress up, wear makeup and take "care" of myself. now that I'm pretty I can see things more clearly and i want to help you girls become he prettiest, best versions of yourselves by telling you all the things wrong with your body and how you can fix it ☺☺💞💞🙈"

IT MAKES ME WANT TO RIP MY HAIR OFF AND SCREAM INTO THESE INFLUENCERS' FACES FOR LYING TO AND MANIPULATING NOT ONLY THEMSELVES BUT TEENAGE GIRLS, LITTLE KIDS WHO DON'T KNOW ANY BETTER AND BELIEVE WHAT THEY SAY!!!!

It’s SO manipulative! “I’m a girls girl and I don’t believe in gatekeeping, here’s the products I’m using babes 🩷☺️”

*Literally rips off all these girls money with her affiliate code scam products*

If an influencer calls themselves a “big sister” repeatedly, it’s like someone calling themselves an “empath,” … it’s fake as hell!

[sturniohoe24]

Season Finale- m.s.

pairing: matt sturniolo x fem!reader

summary: y/n plays for the Somerville girls varsity lacrosse team and the triplets decide to come to her final game of the season.

^for context Somervilles jersey is blue for this game and the competing schools jersey is white

warnings: NOT PROOFREAD, kissing, fluff, slight cursing (lmk if i missed anything)

^^ idk why but this song just kind of reminds me of what i’m planning to write, i might forget and write something different and it might not match sorry😣

blue- matt

pink- reader (#24 blue jersey)

orange- chris

green- teammate/ Bri (#37 blue jersey)

red- coach

purple- ref

bold- the whole team

#15 white jersey- midfield player/ opponent

authors notes: obviously i don’t know how their school works, so im just going to kind of base what i don’t know off of my high school. I also don’t know if they have a girls lax team but idc bc i went to a girls only school and played on a team😘😘

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y/n’s pov

The third quarter of the game just ended and we are now rounding up on the sidelines. “2 minutes!” the referee announces. “You girls are doing great out there, Alia make sure you really block those goals, alright?-” “30 seconds!” The ref calls out again. “Okay we gotta make this quick, Y/N you’re going to start the quarter and break the ball. Bri really stay on top of #13, she’s doing good; and call the ball!”-“alright.” “got it?” we all nod, “yup” i say. “alright, sticks up y/n call it.” “Somerville on 3, sommerville on 3-” “1 2 3 Somerville!” We all scream loudly as we watch the other school start to sprawl out on the field again. “You got this girls, come on!”

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Matt’s pov

Although Nick did play lacrosse for a little while, if he were here Chris and I both know that he would’ve been asking plenty of questions.

I watch as the ref sets the ball between y/n and the other midfield players sticks. I watch the ref blow the whistle as y/n and #15 chuck their sticks in the air, aiming to catch the ball. The ball starts falling and it lands in 15’s stick. Nearly everybody on Somerville’s side starts booing and i hear cheering on the competing schools side. Somehow nearly as loud even though they only have about 7 people with them. I bring my attention back toward the field and I take notice of how beautiful y/n looks right now. I’m pulled out of my trance by hearing “WOO!” being screamed into my ear. I give Chris a dirty look and focus back on the game to see what everyone was cheering for. I see that 15 dropped the ball and watch as y/n scoops it off the ground. “yes! you got this” i whisper to myself.

y/n’s pov

Once I grab the ball from the ground i start running the other way towards the goal. “Don’t forget to cradle the ball, y/n!” I hear from my coach on the sidelines, that being the reason the other girl dropped it. Unfortunately im being blocked by #15 again. Her stick is in my face, and im not sure how the refs are so oblivious to this that they aren’t calling it. I shove her slightly out of my way and the ref now calls it. “that’s a force to body, white ball.” I roll my eyes and once she gets up I pass the ball to her. I get in position and wait for the whistle to blow.

When the whistle blows 15 turns around running towards her goal and purposefully hits into me and nearly knocks me over. My coach is yelling at me and Bri to grab the ball. I regain my balance and catch up to her before Bri does. As she’s inching closer toward the goal I knock the ball out of her stick and the whistle blows. “24 blue out” And he pulls out a yellow card. “are you fucking kidding me?” i mumble to myself, rolling my eyes and nudge 15 as im walking back to the sidelines. I’m praying Bri can stop her from scoring. “it’s alright, they keep ignoring everything the other team is doing, they’re targeting us.” I nod at my coach, clearly annoyed.

The time starts again and Bri is too slow, letting 15 attempt a score. Our goalie catches the ball in her net, now having the chance to collapse the ball.

Somehow the clock has already went down two minutes with about 5 minutes left on the clock, and i’m now allowed back in.

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Theres 38 seconds left on the clock with a score 12-11, putting us one point in the lead. We’re now back at the starting positions. Bri is blocking #13 and if I get put in the penalty box one more time i’m going to quit right here. The whistle blows and I immediately throw up the ball farthest from my opponent. I immediately catch the ball and run toward the goal pushing past everybody and somehow I made it through easily and now i’m facing the goal. The referees start counting down the time with 9 seconds left. I circle around the crease the fastest I can hoping the goalie is too slow and can’t catch me in time. I come back around to the front of the net, hearing my heartbeat as it almost feels like i can’t catch my breath, people chanting my name and counting down the seconds is almost so low to where i can’t hear it with my heart beating so loud in my ears, nearly popping out of my chest. I take the final shot and it goes right past the goalie. We won. My teammates and I run to our goalie as we all take a hit at the helmet (was it just my school that did that😭)

I turn back and see Matt and Chris exiting the bleachers. I run to my bag to take off my cleats, goggles, my mouth guard, etc. Once I’m finished getting changed in the locker room, i come out to meet two of the Sturniolo Triplets.

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I walk back into matt’s room still drying my hair from the shower i just took. He looks up from his phone smiling at me. I place down my towel and crawl into bed with matt. He turns off his phone and turns to me, staring esch other in the face. We slowly lean in towards each other and meet in the middle as he pulls me into a kiss. The kiss is only about few seconds yet it feels like it has been forever. This is totally the best way to end the lacrosse season.

Authors Note: CHAT IS THIS GOOD??? I FEEL LIKE ITS REALLY MID IF EVEN THAT CAN SM1 BE HONEST LIKE SEND AN ANONYMOUS REQUEST BC I NEED TO KNOW. WRITING ISNT MY SPECIALTY‼️‼️