#i just. im so. we are on different planets
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I cannot be the only one who wants to bang peepaw Alpha Trion plEASE TELL ME IM NOT ALONE 😭
I will never stop being an old man enjoyer. Give us your spike, peepaw
“I’m relieved we aren’t the only ones in this universe.” The words echo in his processor like sand in the desert wind. Fading in and out of consciousness under the rubble, he clings onto the softness of your voice, the faded edges of your smile burnt into his memory. He cannot make sense of your shape anymore, it’s a blotch of ink in his vision, something he recalls but cannot fully visualize. His mind reaches out to you, so close yet so far away. With every step he takes, you grow smaller, and still, you patiently wait for him with your arms outstretched. Like old times. You are dead. This he knows. Unequivocally dead. His digits twitch, warnings encapsulate his vision, reminding him each and every nanoclik of wakefulness that the next in-vent could be his last. He can’t help himself. Duty has led his life for so long, bestowed upon him by his creator, and he cannot fall back now and forgo his promise to protect Cybertron. But he is weak; pain receptors growing numb from the boulders crushing his frame, limbs quivering from a battle long lost. Primus forgive him, allow him this final comfort. Cycles ago, your crew had first established contact with Cybertron. It was a message sent across space, a simple signal that would tie your fates forever. The Council debated answering, fearing you could pose a threat to their planet, but there were only three ships with only a handful of members each. They chose fraternization over static silence. Communication was difficult, but somehow, someway, you understood each other just enough to arrive on their planet. Surprise struck him when he saw your kind, small, frail and soft to the touch. Your people were just as startled as them, but in your optics he saw something greater; a delight in meeting fellow sentient beings. They took in your crew and treated them like brothers and sisters, communicating through gestures and drawings. You could not speak their language, but they could learn yours. Knowledge was shared among you, tales of your worlds, their history, your technology, your people… Perhaps your place among your own was what drew him to you. Standing on the sidelines, you watched and took notes, occasionally serving as a sketch artist to exchange information. The others were mingling with the Council, asking questions, telling stories, showing what machinery brought you to them. But you kept your distance, politely nodding along and busying yourself with your notebooks. When he approached you, taking slow careful steps, you nearly dropped your pen in shock. His size was already intimidating by Cybertronian standards, but for a human? He could barely imagine the primal fear you felt when met with someone of his stature. You recovered quickly despite it, uneasy but maintaining your composure. Having knelt down to your level, he offered you servo, the sand within it shaping into a miniature version of your ship. You blinked, clutching your notebook to your chassis. Then, after a drawn out silence, you smiled, optics gleaming with wonder. That was the start of your companionship. You would sit in his servo, looking up at the night sky, speaking words he could barely understand but tried his hardest to learn. He recalls bits and pieces, meanings he managed to grasp through what you taught him. It wasn’t long until your time together grew intimate. As a prime, he was so focused on his duties that he barely got the chance to relax, much less interface. Things were… difficult due to the size difference, but there were workarounds. Charge runs through his fuel lines at the memory. How you would brush your digits against his valve, testing the waters so to say, before slipping your servo inside of it. There was no true relief in the interface, no way for you to properly satisfy each other. But you were both content, savoring every moment of your companionship. You would press your lips to his spike, working your servo in and out of his gushing valve. It made his frame shudder and his optics glitch.
He touched you much the same way, digits rubbing at the sensitive nerves between your thighs, gazing down at you lovingly as you grit your denta and arched your optical ridge in pleasure.
#transformers x reader#transformers x human#transformers one#tf one alpha trion#alpha trion x reader#valveplug
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Jesus imagine if we confirm the existence of extraterrestrial life the Taxonomy would be insane
#what would that field of study be called. Xenobiology?#edit im not rewriting all this but apparently xenobiology is already an existing term for something else so. thats stupid#wed have different kingdoms too beside animalia fungi and those others like whole new kingdoms!!#would we lump all et lifeforms into one kingdom despite them coming from different planets (kinda like the Carnivora thing. a bit)#just to come to the conclusion that thats stupid#Another edit i meant carnosauria. not carnivora#idk man its such an interesting concept to think about#what would the confirmation of et life mean for biology as a field of study#>1k
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son boy raccoon trash can man suffering in a dnd au as a cleric bc his warlock will not stop committing murders and he has to keep coming up with reasons murder is valid to convince the gm its fine and under control
#my characters#oops i fell in love#right is trying his best in the au to think about all the logic behind killing someone despite being a cleric SPECIFICALLY#bc he refuses to hurt anyone irl or in dnd and ok fine their warlock can have a little murder as a treat#and the body count is adding up and hes like ... so tired..... please can you not kill for five minutes im running out of excuses#fwiw he has the weird logic of the group in the base plot and the guy who is the gm here#is v open about ok but if we ask right then hell give an unhinged answer completely thought out and rationalized#and in fact asks him hey i know you refuse to hurt people but im having a debate with these two coworkers#if you had to commit a crime for aaaaaanyone on the planet who would you commit a crime for#and he doesnt even hesitate to say luca obviously to which the asker is like WHAT ABOUT MY DAUGHTER#YOU WANNA MARRY HER AND WONT COMMIT A CRIME FOR HER? but LUCA? of all people???? not even brent?#and right is just so confused because first off brent would probably be the one committing a crime for him without being forced#(brent agrees with this statement with a shrug) and second off luca has really weird coworkers and thought he was getting stalked for a bit#due to a misunderstanding with said one weird coworker so yeah obviously right would threaten the guy with a gun which is illegal and#third and final how could he face his beloved angel (the daughter mentioned above) if he was a criminal#he cant tarnish a sweet little innocent girls opinion by committing a crime IN HER NAME gosh fuck off with that attitude#he has STANDARDS thank you very much#and the three at the table are all like okay yeah that was really thought out on the fly youre right#also brent do not commit any crimes for him please and brent just nods in agreement bc ok he wont commit a crime unprompted#also hi animal crossing emotes are so fun to doodle for bye#once again i am baffled by how different the colors look on my laptop in the art program vs posting to tumblr#im going to go insane at how different they look#IM COLOR PICKING FOR MY OWN OCS AND ITS SO WRONG LOOKING IDK MAN
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god i should not be dwelling on this im just so haunted by that """low spoons""" recipe. we are on entirely different planets. what the fuck are you talking about
"easy, quick" "less than 35 min" yea you were doing this professionally huh
#toy txt post#vagueing. tho its not hard to find#low spoons!!!!!!!!! fucking. you want me to dare to turn the fucking pan on before i have Fully Prepped Everything I Need To?#is it More Efficient and Makes It Cook Faster and Only Take 35min MAYBE 45 at most?(LMAO? different planets) sure maybe#im venuinely glad for that person that being a professional in a kitchen for a decade has made so much of cooking sort of second nature#muscle memory type tasks that they dont have to think about and therefore dont take significant spoons to do but holy fuck its got them#way super out of touch with us bitches for whom low spoons is like im eating spicy cheezits from the box and hoping it gives me#the energy and kick to prepare something with more actual nutrients like maybe cheese#cheese + crackers + store bought pre sliced pepperoni takes a lot of effort but the nutrient density to effort ratio hlis high enough i can#often do it now#other times its some Canned Soup which i acknowledge is too many spoons even for some bc theres multiple steps involved!#god its just. insane to me. to call that recipe low spoons. the cognitive load alone. even if i got it done in 45min. at what fucking cost?#god just. like. just share your recipe and let ppl come to it w their own skill level and judge on their own if its low or medium or high#spoons. i think thats it. the audacity to call it low spoons so confidently. also like oh yay you washed all the dishes as you go now you#dont have to do them at the end! ok i just used up way more energy multitasking that tho ? at least the slow cooker /rice cooker recipes#are low spoons in the sense of not needing to spend time babysitting the food as it cooks#i just. im so. we are on different planets#anyway im having a faiely low spoons meal of. canned soup#i probably could make a soup i like one of these dayd and i do want to try soups but also. i need to understand what the fuck kind of#Processing the canning companies are doing to the meat to make its texture so much better than any freshly prepared or homemade soup ive#ever had in my life. how are you getting such perfect cubes of such good texture. how do i do that to meat at home?????????#ok. ok IM DONE im done thinking about this. going to eat my soup in peace. maybe watch more xena#sorry for being a pathetic bitch who cant cook and a hater or whatever. processed food my beloved. food with very few steps my beloved#microwave my beloved
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devastating news the twst fandom can’t separate the two orthos from each other (ORTHO having og orthos memories does not automatically make him 16 please pleas egod he is his own entirely different person that’s the whole point) (i rant in the tags sorry i’m going insane) (autistic ramblings of a madman)
#twisted wonderland#ortho shroud#twst#i could rant about this for so long it makes me so mad#i do agree that ortho should be included more in first year fan content#but him being a first year does not automatically make him 16 years old#there are canonical child prodigies that attend nrc they are mentioned by trey in book 1#(im not saying that he’s a child prodigy i am saying that children attend nrc)#orthos age is still undefined in his character profile post b6#but we know that idia took 2 years to make him and he finished making him when he was 12. ortho was made 6 years ago#also it’s just so obvious that og ortho is Supposed to be older than him#og ortho being referred to as orthos older brother and their differences in voice and how they act#people get really bothered when people call ortho a child#they’re like SO YOU THINK HES DUMB? INCAPABLE? like no that’s a whole different sentence#he’s so intelligent and capable and deals with growth and struggles and accomplishments#but i don’t think that changes anything?#he’s an equal to his peers because he’s a student and he’s learning with them! just like how grims seen as an equal#that fuckass cat /affectionate#i hope ortho blows up the planet
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pesterquest karkats route is fucking insane by the way. i got the bad ending first and THEN the so called good ending was so fucking undwrwhelming after that i just had to sit there
#your best friend confessed his feelings for you to get you to stay#but you refuse to endanger him and let him help and now he doesnt even know if youre ALIVE#not to mention you didnt even fuckign acknowledge his confession of the feelings you both have been dancing around#your entire friendship#so you just left him like that#vs#oh boy lets send karkat to a different planet to the house that specifically has one of the worst guardians so we can play video games#like#😭#im sorry but qhat#even with the davekat BRO STILL EXISTS THAT IS STILL A CONCERN#what about i dont know john with his awesome dad the only solid parental figure in the group#or I DONT KNOW jADE who literally JUST HAD HER ROUTE and it was all about being lonely#even rose like mom is hardly there at least rose would ve able to find somewhere to hide him#dave?????? his tiny ass room constantly recording cameras everyqhere AND BRO
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Ralsei deltarune is literally so sketchy but also have we considered. That’s hes cute your honor have we considered this
#deltarune#decided im gonna replay deltarune and then maybe attempt to do evil bastard shit in undertale#cuz i am just so hyped up after replaying the pacifist route and want to do more but hm#just dont think im mentally prepared to kill these bitches yet#and ive literally forgotten everything that happens in ch1 of deltarune#im halfway through the first chapter and damn lol ralsei really is just so fucking sketchy#like he tells kris that their choices matter of course and he’ll support whatever they decide#but obviously kris cant actually make any decisions of their own and ralsei is like following the hero script to a T#and he gets upset with susie for constantly defying the narrative#i dont think id say ralsei is like the mastermind of this strange universe where you cant make choices#but he is suspiciously conformist like hes very eager to uphold a narrative and its like hes on a completely different planet#also you know theres the fact that hes like an alternate asriel or some shit#i dont trust him but despite this. he is very cute i do wanna kiss his nose#like hes such a satirized version of the pacifist that it feels fake as shit but i still love him#like. we go through the acid tunnel of love. DOES THIS MEAN NOTHING TO YOU#he could kill everyone and i wouldnt be surprised in the slightest and also im squishing his face
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i think i should kill myself not necessarily as a desire to be dead but because i think life is incredibly boring and even moments of genuine joy dont particularly make living 70+ years of basically Nothing and Chores worthwhile. i want to see if theres another universe ill go to. and if theres not then at least i dont have to do laundry and to work anymore
#i got over being violently suicidal bc i hated myself but im still suicidal just in a different way#all happiness in life is 'despite' something or a 'but'#idk. 'i spent an amazing day with all my friends and it felt like life was worth living!' yes but thats IN SPITE OF everything else being#pointless. like the reason it feels so good is because its finally not boring and awful for five minutes not necessarily that its the#greatest joy a human being can experience#i dont particularly think anything we can experience on earth or in a human body is very interesting. its only interesting in comparison to#everyday life. we arent psychic or having ecstatic visions or discovering new worlds and colors or anything particularly monumental#i want to die so i can have the potential to shift to another planet or reality#i want to join a cult NOT bc i think theyre not insanely abusive and corrupt and evil or could be good but because i need#to be made delusional or something. like i need my brain twisted into a new shape. not into a healthy shape or anything or to be 'fixed'#i need to be fully crazy or in a coma or a permanent drug induced episode or something. or be dead#those are the options. im simply so bored of being alive no matter if life goes good or bad im just not interested#its like a tv show i dont particularly like. im not saying its bad its just not for me. id like to change the channel
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Finally rewatching some doctor who, and the episode 'midnight' is such a different experience now what the fuck.
Spent the first half of the episode like "wait the doctor IS being reasonable this is an undiscovered lifeform its just trying to learn things its not its fault people think its creepy </3" and also "this is a bit more contrived than I remember. Why are all these tourists down for Murder after 20 minutes of someone repeating what they say." But of course the episode is having so much fun with itself that I'm having fun too <3
Anyway my crack theory is that the midnight creature is post-finale bill, due to the line, while possessing someone, of "I can move, I can feel again, I'm coming back to life" and all the really obvious evil little smiles
#godsrambles#hm maybe i will make a tag for this#drwho tag#cant believe thinking deeply about bills character has affected even this#even though the episode heavily implies the midnight creature is evil. im STILL like.#'augh thats a Creature! its probably been completely alone for who knows how long! it Sprinted towards the first people it saw!'#'maybe it Was just learning and it only became 'evil' because it learned from murderous tourists!'#'and even if it IS evil doesnt it deserve a chance? if the doctor couldve contained it safely..... take it to eldritch rehab............'#of course theres the line 'i can feel again' which implies it is NOT a brand new creature. insane about the 1 sec of lore#for a 1 episode creature we will never see ever again. who were they..........#i dont want dr who to answer that question its just fun to wonder about#how does a creature get trapped on an inhospitable planet for who knows how long..... do 'xtonic rays' destroy bodies but not souls???#someone exposed to the stars light and lost almost everything. just a shell of their former self. no body no thoughts just a shadow#idk!!!!! comparing this random 1 episode Creature-Meant-To-Be-Spooky to bill. i guess. it just hits different now#as a kid i thought 'wow the doctor shouldnt give it the benefit of the doubt its obviously evil'#but now i get it!!! the doctor has seen so much evil and Done so much evil. cant dismiss a creature just for being suspicious#reaching out to try and save someone else who he can only imagine has been so so terribly alone for way too long. augh#and this is season 4 so like. after everything in the s3 finale. one million yard stares into the distance.#ok one more thing. bill finds this creature and invites it to be a henchmaniac. that is all
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gritting my teeth. im too tired to draw, several scenes at that, but i am imagining little vignettes and it pisses me OFF. one of yves and elias sitting on elias' balcony, overlooking the entirety of keeden. another one of jeurgen, eyes wide, computer illuminating his whole face as it flashes with different messages, and another of kass hunched over as she speaks to her newly-born NHP in curious wonder, and then of telly, who just keeps lookin in the mirror at his own face, his. well. everything. his suit's done.
#swear to god#when im not tired#i will try..#i think im physically sick. body sluggish and i feel really tired#hrmph#sigh. lancer party in my head tho#we're so... different#its so weird how its a team#ALSO OOPS lyrics related#its making me see the pictures in my head#its so vivid its a shame i dont feel like gettin it out rn#like the “we watch the city vibrate” really hits different when u have the context for whats happening on Bo#we really just r watching it happen#heaven is NOT a place we can all have on this fucked planet but man. its hopeful yk#this is lancer rpg btw sorry i should say#if you see the name yves w/o the tumor assume im talking abt the world famous TTRPG Lancer Campaign Dog Days created by Spagini#song is yves tumor tho yea. fear evil like fire#she said it was literally yves and now im hunched over and seeing the images in my head. it is. it is yves... yeha..#i love seeing the images in my head so clearly but it becomes so miserable when i cannot act on them
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btw in my theoretical peculiar rewrite that Will not ever happen bc im not a writer anymore i left that life behind in 2017. but in my theoretical one its rly mostly just a rewrite of likee. maybe a bit of book 3 and then Completely rewriting books 4-6
#i like some of the stuff from the 2nd trilogy. mainly the stuff that was brought up in the first book that seemed rly interesting thar they#then forgot abt in the 2nd book and/#or solved off screen or came up with some other reason for it to not matter. like. the american conflict wouldve been so cool. but then#they just decide its the noor story and r like Oh yeah rhe ymbrynes solved all the american stuff so don't even worry abt it 👍#having the kids like. take modern normal lessons and have jacob trying to like. teach them while also trying 2 hide that hes trying to#follow jn abes footsteps. thats so fun . but i stead he just like straight up leaves and the kids r basically gone the entre time...#and the like. Omg theres like a group of normals that r hunting peculiars and have been for centuries. thats rly rly interesting. and then#theyre judt like Nah it was wights the whole time.#Like. i like noor i think shes rly cool i just think the prophecy is So stupid#im never gonna get over the way that the entire prophecy was pointless. like trying to find the other kids was pointless. bc the prophecy#didnt need 7 it needed 1 and the others were just spares. so it literlaly xouldve been like. Finished as soon as it started. and it was#just so generic and boring like... the first trilogy was very unique and like interesting and different#and then in the 2jd theyre like Omg this is the chosen one and shes one of the chosen jn this prophecy where 7 kids etc#i also think its rly stupid that theyre all light eaters..#if we Have to have the stupid 7 prophecy like were every other book on this planet can at least be like. Omg... and theyre all very very#powerful peculiars from some of the peculiar subcategories. but whatever...#but ya. the main things id change abt book 3 is like. the weird like... Omg all peculiars Used to be hollows ???? thats why jacob can ???#understand them ??? bc hes part hollow ????? Thats so fucking stupid.#its weird. and also in my au i would have emma and jacob break up bc i think that makes sense and emma is my everything girl but i feel#like in the actual books they broke up and then havob was immediately like Noor is my everything shes the reason i live im nothing without#her . and its been 2 hours since they met. and emma is right fhere and they broke up 2 days ago. yk...#i also think id just have the series be like.#a bitttt more spread out ?? like a little bit at least.. bc it takes place over the span of 6 months#roughly. which for the first trilogy i get why itd be very quick succession bc those kids were on a mission#idk. i just think its kinda silly that jacob was So into emma like Omg well never be apart she completes me etc within like. 3 months. and#then is the same with noor after like 2 days. Ik teenagers r like that Fucking trust me im so insanely aware that teenagers will fall#deeply deeply deeply in love with somebody very quickly even when tht relationship isnt rly good for either party . trust me im so insanely#fucking aware . LMAO. but it was just a bit annoying esp bc emma was just completely written out basically... it sucked :( it sucks that al#of the peculiar chuldren bssicslly werent there like. idk. it rly just felt like jacob was like Ok done with them NOOR TIMEEE#and like i said i love noor shes great im sooo down with her i judt wiuldnt make her literally the chosen one snd specialest girl on earth
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i would love to make kirby charts for my headcanons and theories
#sage speaks#basically i remember someone saying in a lore video i think that#whomever inhabited the new world in fl (i think it was confirmed to be the ancients but im not sure)#basically they were just humans#i think that's obvious since theres straight up english dialogue in ghat game#and that opens such a can because 1 adeleine 2 theres so many human-like characters in kirby and it makes me think that maybe they're the#descendants of the ancients#like the mage sisters look so almost human you cannot tell me that they didn't descend from humans#the same goes for ripple queen and most fairies and such they r basically humans#taranza and sectonia r kinda human esc but i think thats more of a we dont want to put actual spiders in a game#but then again the reason could be that due to their environment they evolved in different ways#especially since popstar is a pretty magically charged planet#the other chart is more of a magic vs weapons chart#just to visualise who uses characters' use of weapons vs their use if magic#like taranza uses basically only magic#while bandee seems to only use spears even if he has some pocket dimension where he brings three spears out of nowhere/j#but then characters like dedede seem to use only weapons but he does seem to be able to use basic elemental magic#etc etc.#i might do it tomorrow
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i have many thoughts in general but this tidbit from tingyun's voice lines is one of the things i wanna elaborate some more on at some point...
" Every time I head out, I leave a letter behind and lock it in the drawers of my shop. If I come back, then I'll burn it later. If I don't... then it'll be something for others to remember me by."
#OOC.#this post is more of a reminder to myself before i go try to write some stuff for nat and/or stelle#but idk i like her concept of being pacifistic despite the inherent dangers of her position as... basically a galactic ambassador?#it says that most reps take weapons with them but she refuses to because she believes that you should build relationships from a foundation#of peace instead of threat of violence#which has worked in her favor but idk its kinda sombering knowing that she basically leaves her last words in a letter every time sh#e leaves for another planet to do her job because she knows shes leaving herself vulnerable if somebody wanted to do something to hurt her#and she burns it every time she comes back only to rewrite it again months later when she goes on her next trip#xi.anzhou's lore is ROUGH dont get me wrong but theres a lot of fun concepts in there that im smashing together LMAO#also her traveling the way she does opens up so much room to meet literally anybody#its just jarilo-vi right now but as more worlds open up it just gives her more room to work with#also the fact that it opens up a lot of possiblities for world building for her to come to these planets because she's there ON business an#trade & commerce is one of the BIGGEST things a society needs. one decision could steer the entire direction of their society in a complete#y different direction#like even just introducing more leisurely/hobby focused products can be a huge turning point for a war stricken world#or better materials for their tech and their buildings#new crops in exchange for what they have#literally the exchange we see in her lore is her discussing taking just a few samples of a world's plants and growing it on xianzhou for#commercial sale AND that world would recieve shipments of said crops along with wahtever other deals they struck#and blablabla yes i know capitalism whatever. tis the way of the world and i think its really interesting frmo a worldbuilding standpoint#tingyuns a very interesting character because she can change a lot of things in very little time in the big picture#i feel like she's commonly brushed off as a shallow character who doesnt do much but she's one of the most accomplished characters in xian#zhou EASILY#yes you could argue that jing yuan is more because of his general shit or yukong is the helm master blablabla like Yes they are also very#accomplished but she is the literal only reason that the grand fairs are FAMOUS throughout the galaxy. they werent until she took leadershi#she's completed trade missions to SIXTEEN different panets and is implied to have formed alliances with at least a few of them#and was the one to renew xianzhou's mutual alliance with the IPC#i dunno#also i think people see her as way more of a trickster than she is#like ... i thought she was too but she really isn't particularly mischevious? girls tried to leave MULTIPLE times during the story bc she
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youtube
thoschei early days
#they get their start in lowtown. are as bad as expected so get chased and beat up a bunch. but they get better#after they run away they run into each other by accident on some planet. one of them about to get caught so the other steps in#why work when youve got a ship and can scam people for the rest#it's the babyversion of what they'dbe now if they joined forces#their skills combined. you can already see their differences but morethan that you see how they /complement/#like two pieces of a puzzle#the doctors smoothtalking and charm grows into being able to turn armies around with words alone#the masters eye for detail and patience for meticulous preparation turns into#well#rasputin i guess#im not good enough at character to write this fic but i wanna read it so bad#and like this is how they fall out too right? already in there#'since we met im not sure if ive fallen for you baby or if youve set me up to take the fall'#'love is just another con. a fairytale to lead them on. but together baby maybe we could love them all'#thoschei
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#i spent the whole day building up and filling / decorating the first three bookshelves we got for our library (even tho we already live#in this house for a little over a year now) and im absolutely in awe im gonna be honest#but im also very exhausted (damn the covid aftermath!!)#but overall just very happy#the shelves are low ones as we have sloped roofs but thats even better cuz they melt into the backround and are swallowed by my nightblue#walls and its just so whimsy i swear to god#gonna have to adjust some books and probably need a fourth one and also decorate differently but for now its absolutely amazing and i love#still so much to do but we hang in there#peace and love on planet earth
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i dont have a lot of spanish music in my phone and like. its even less when compared to like the huge amount of not spanish music on there. anyways that means even though i almost always have music playing its rare for this situation to have occured but
its late, and my phone started playing spanish music from the other room while i brushed my teeth. and listening to the muffled crooning and trumpets i was briefly thrown back into my 12 year old body, standing in my childhood bathroom listening to the neighbors loudly play their music down the street while i got ready for bed and felt such a crushing sense of longing and homesickness for a community I'll never have again that. i think i might actually be ill now
#i cant. even if i went back those families i knew then arent there anymore.#and trying to meet new ones? I'm. its so hard for a lot of different reasons i wont get into. but more than that#its just... not as common anymore. people get in trouble more easily and things are.... well some people would call it shaping or cleaning#up the neighborhood but like. i can barely recognize my home anymore. not the house but the... the block. idk.#theres modern buildings on the lots where we rode our horses. empty homes and overpriced businesses.#currently i live in a gated community. its a rental. all the houses look the same. i feel like im on the fucking dark planet from#A Wrinkle In Time. My childhood houses door was yellow. my moms house is pink. i miss the neighbors purple home. I'm in a beige hell.#i've a note saying my lawn is too tall and the flowers need to be killed. I've never heard anyone play music loud enough for me to hear too#my posts#I've made too many posts today. this is a sign of sleep deprivation btw in the future if someome could come put me down before i get here#again that'd be nice
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