#are low spoons in the sense of not needing to spend time babysitting the food as it cooks
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god i should not be dwelling on this im just so haunted by that """low spoons""" recipe. we are on entirely different planets. what the fuck are you talking about
"easy, quick" "less than 35 min" yea you were doing this professionally huh
#toy txt post#vagueing. tho its not hard to find#low spoons!!!!!!!!! fucking. you want me to dare to turn the fucking pan on before i have Fully Prepped Everything I Need To?#is it More Efficient and Makes It Cook Faster and Only Take 35min MAYBE 45 at most?(LMAO? different planets) sure maybe#im venuinely glad for that person that being a professional in a kitchen for a decade has made so much of cooking sort of second nature#muscle memory type tasks that they dont have to think about and therefore dont take significant spoons to do but holy fuck its got them#way super out of touch with us bitches for whom low spoons is like im eating spicy cheezits from the box and hoping it gives me#the energy and kick to prepare something with more actual nutrients like maybe cheese#cheese + crackers + store bought pre sliced pepperoni takes a lot of effort but the nutrient density to effort ratio hlis high enough i can#often do it now#other times its some Canned Soup which i acknowledge is too many spoons even for some bc theres multiple steps involved!#god its just. insane to me. to call that recipe low spoons. the cognitive load alone. even if i got it done in 45min. at what fucking cost?#god just. like. just share your recipe and let ppl come to it w their own skill level and judge on their own if its low or medium or high#spoons. i think thats it. the audacity to call it low spoons so confidently. also like oh yay you washed all the dishes as you go now you#dont have to do them at the end! ok i just used up way more energy multitasking that tho ? at least the slow cooker /rice cooker recipes#are low spoons in the sense of not needing to spend time babysitting the food as it cooks#i just. im so. we are on different planets#anyway im having a faiely low spoons meal of. canned soup#i probably could make a soup i like one of these dayd and i do want to try soups but also. i need to understand what the fuck kind of#Processing the canning companies are doing to the meat to make its texture so much better than any freshly prepared or homemade soup ive#ever had in my life. how are you getting such perfect cubes of such good texture. how do i do that to meat at home?????????#ok. ok IM DONE im done thinking about this. going to eat my soup in peace. maybe watch more xena#sorry for being a pathetic bitch who cant cook and a hater or whatever. processed food my beloved. food with very few steps my beloved#microwave my beloved
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Can I please request for LoV content though this time the reader isn’t anyone’s s/o per say, just like everyone’s mama in a sense, always being the one who care for them and give them love, big spooning, cuddle, help them with various stuff. And because they are ‘LoV mama’ they are quiet dominant and everyone listens to them and respect them. Can I get headcannons for LoV interactions with her? And if possible for another post a sequel of how they will react when they found out that she has a lover who basically babies her and she likes it too. How will they react? Will they treat her differently? Jealous? Thank you so much!!!!! 💕💕💕💕
Awwwww 🥺 just let me know if you want me to tag you whenever I do the other post ���️ it got really laggy before I could add more so… :’)
Just some small stuff, I’ll do like one shots and the other thing in another post or two if you want me to tag you or somethin lol
Part 2
Kurogiri
Lemme tell you right now, he is absolutely relieved because now he’s got someone else to “babysit” the league
He finally feels comfortable enough to have a day just to himself
^ He’s just happy he doesn’t have to constantly worry about Dabi burning down their base, or Shigaraki turning Toga to dust
He’s kind of like a kid in a way
^ Like he’s looking for praise in a way, but not really
Encourage him when he’s doing a good job
Let him vent when a certain brat pisses him off
And PLEASE help him discipline said brat
^ He will literally beg you, just do it please
He definitely appreciates you the most out of everyone
He likes getting a pat on the back when he’s doing a good job, or even just having a drink with you when “handjob” is finally asleep I had to I’m sorry I love that nickname so much
You’ve got either really insulting nicknames or really sweet ones for everyone in the league, but you guys only use them when it’s just you two
You guys randomly get Magne pride stuff, like the transgender flag or those pins you find everywhere during pride month
^ Sometimes Toga too
^ And you if you’re part of it, but he goes without you if it’s for you, because then it wouldn’t be a surprise
He likes head pats but that’s all he’s comfortable with
Shigaraki
Ok, he’s definitely a bitch to you too
^ at first at least
In general, he didn’t really like people and his tolerance for everyone was pretty low for a long time
The only people he interacted with were the same few people, and they basically spoiled and groomed him, so it takes him the longest to warm up to you
He doesn’t like being told no, so expect him to act like a toddler when you tell him he can’t do something
He does kind of like having another decent parental figure even though in his head afo’s a good dad
He might invite you to go with him to GameStop or something like that
^ Or maybe just to grab a quick snack from a ramen shop or something along the lines of that
He’s somewhere between a moody teenager and a four year old, just remember that
Please don’t get mad at him, he feels bad after an hour or two
^ Kurogiri has to make him apologize for whatever he did though because he’s too stubborn to do it himself
He lets you pick out one of his good controllers and headsets so you can play with him in your own room, or with him, he doesn’t mind
Once he’s fully comfortable with you, he’s clingy as hell
Always asks for hugs or head scratches, most likely both
He tries his best not to snap at you like he does with everyone else, and he probably has the most patience with you
He doesn’t really cuddle with you since it’d be a little weird if you guys aren’t dating, but he does hug you from behind every once in a while
Likes to be close to you in general
He likes when you take care of his scars and wounds for him, or when you get him to stop scratching his neck
^ Cause it shows you care, and he doesn’t really think anyone really does except for Kurogiri and AFO
Probably the touchiest one
Expect to be giving him some form of attention every second, whether it’s talking to him or just holding his wrist
Probably the one that enforces your rules honestly (if you have any)
Basically he’s a simp, but like the platonic kind of simp
Dabi
Dabi’s a bit like Shigaraki
It does take him a bit to open up, but only about half the amount of time it takes Shigaraki to
He does feel bad when you get mad, and it takes him about the same amount of time to feel guilty
He definitely invites you to go places with him, but it’s usually a bar or a good spot to commit arson
He’s basically a moody teenager, that’s it, so he’s at least manageable
Sometimes he goes with you to get snacks or drinks (soft drinks basically), but if he does, expect to be the one paying
Might give you a cigarette every once in a while if you smoke, and he always offers to light it for you
He definitely likes to vent to you about his day, or how Shigaraki’s been bugging him more than usual
^ It’s mainly because you’re the only one that listens though mainly
^ He still appreciates it though, don’t get it wrong
One of his favorite pastimes is to walk around the city at night with you and maybe Kurogiri
He’s not very touchy in general, so don’t expect anything more than a pat on the back
Sometimes though, if you want a hug or something he’ll let you get one from him
He’s still not touchy at all, so don’t ask for very much
^ Lemme put it this way, expect more from pretty much everyone else except him
Spinner
He always runs to you about Dabi picking on him for his quirk when Kurogiri’s not around
Sometimes he asks you to play a game with him, but not very often
^ Even Shigaraki probably asks more than Spinner does
He’s pretty quiet with you most of the time, and he won’t usually talk to you unless you start a conversation
^ Basically he only talks to you when he needs to
He’s not exactly the kind of guy that’ll go out for food with you since his quirk makes him pretty easy to spot, but he does offer to help cook every once in a while
He likes to show you his collection of knockoff stain clothing
He has made efforts to try to get to know you more, but he’s a little shy
Get him Stain merch and you’ll automatically be his favorite out of everyone in the league
^ Shigaraki might kill you though, just a heads up
Don’t touch him unless you’re treating his wounds, he’s worse than Dabi is
Magne
She loves going out with you and Toga
^ Could be for food, or maybe clothes shopping, hell, even just a walk
^ She just likes spending time with you, but yes, it is preferred if Toga and Twice could come along
She’s gotta be the sweetest person out of the whole league
She’s probably called you her sibling a few times just so you know her opinion on you
You’ve got at least a few matching shirts and jackets with her and Toga
She probably offers to help you around the base more than anyone (except kurogiri)
You’re definitely in the top 3 favorites
She likes to do skincare routines with Toga, Twice, and you
Definitely paints her nails and asks you how it looks first
She’s totally onboard with you sitting in her lap, but it’s just for hugs, don’t get it mixed up
She’s probably one of the touchiest people out of the league
^ Not nearly as much as Shig, but she’s probably third
Toga
You’re a sibling too, 100%
She asks you to sharpen and clean her knives daily, but she always repays the favor by helping you cook or by cleaning 2-3 rooms
She’s given you one of her favorite knives to keep for your birthday, or just any special event of yours
She always asks you to put her hair up for her, and if your hair is long enough, she asks if she can do your hair
She’s really picky about anything she gets you, and she always pays attention to the smallest details in everything she gives you
She’s given you quite a lot of jewelry she stole from corpses, whether you wear it or not
^ You can sell it too, and she’s fine with it, just tell her thank you first though
She always wants to watch you cook and she’s even tried to make your favorite food once or twice with Kurogiri and Magne
She asks you to paint her nails for her, even if you’re not good at it, since one hand always turns out better than the other
Face masks and cleansers are a must, she prefers if you do more skincare stuff with her, but that’s the bare minimum
Definitely has a picture of you, Magne, her, and Twice as the wallpaper on her phone
She’s somewhat touchy, she’s all for hugs and maybe hand holding every once in a while
^ That’s it though
Twice
He likes to smoke with you (if you do)
^ If you don’t, he still likes to talk to you when he does
He’s really interested in your hobbies and what you like to do
He’s comfortable with taking off his mask fully when it’s just you two and no one else
He thinks your laugh is cute in the same way a puppy’s cute
He likes being cared for by you, and you’re always going to be in his top 3
His all-time favorite thing about you is just the simple fact that you accept him for who he is, flaws and all
He comes to you for head pats at least four times a day, and he likes holding your hand because it makes him feel safe and secure
He loves how gentle you are with him, and how you try your best to understand him
^ He does feel extremely bad when he involuntarily insults you
^ Tell him you know he didn’t mean it and that you still like him please
He loves cuddles, but only when he’s tired
^ It’s usually just him laying his head on your shoulder though
Again, having you around in general makes him feel safe
So after a long day of fighting heroes, he just wants to sit with you until he falls asleep
Compress
He basically the only other person besides Kurogiri that doesn’t have the mindset of a 15 year old or younger
It’s nice that he’s got someone other than Kurogiri to talk to now
He offers to help with chores the most
Likes to entertain you with magic tricks, and he always shows you his newest tricks first
^ Please tell him he did a good job and that it was convincing
He knows a good deal about you, like your favorite food and your favorite spot in the city
Sometimes he goes on walks with you when the tension after a mission dies down
He takes you out for food once or twice a week, and for a snack run every other week
^ He always gets a lot of stuff though, so it’s ok
He’s always the first to notice anything about you, like a new haircut or a new shirt
^ He’s always the first to compliment you on it too
On a scale of 1-10, he’s probably a 3 as far as being touchy goes
He appreciates praise and maybe pats on the back, but he doesn’t really care much about themselves
He doesn’t really actively seek your attention like Shigaraki does, but he doesn’t complain when he gets it
#tomura shigaraki#shigaraki#kurogiri#mr compress#league of villains#himiko toga#twice mha#jin bubaigawara#magne bnha#spinner bnha
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DILF club for the ultimate ship meme?
Consider I got two DILF club requests for this meme, I’ll do The way I tend to be Universe for this one, since it’s the more canon universe. (More canon than OUAT anyway.)
Send in two (or more) names and I’ll fill all this out about the ship!
General:
Rate the Ship - Awful | Ew | No pics pls | I’m not comfortable | Alright | I like it! | Got Pics? | Let’s do it! | Why is this not getting more attention?! | The OT3 to rule all other OT3s
How long will they last? For as long as they can stand one another I’d imagine.
How quickly did/will they fall in love? I think very slowly, it’s a slow descend into love for all of them. More one of those, we’ve been sleeping together, fucking each other, and spending time with each other for months now, and oh shit, I think I might love you both...
How was their first kiss? Passionate, heated, and in the middle of fucking each other to keep warm.
Wedding:
Who proposed? I like to think the three of them all had something planned on the same night and looped their prospective kids into their proposal, but didn’t clue the other kids or their partners in. And only when the kids talk to one another do they discover that all three of their dads are trying to propose to each other. So naturally, the kids band together and ‘ruin’ their fathers’ proposals but only because they have one giant one planned at lookout point where they get all three men together and reveal the jig. Naturally, all three of them accept.
Who is the best man/men? Derek is the best man, Melissa is their best ma’am.
Who are the groom’s maid(s)/men? Malia, Jackson, Allison, Isaac, Stiles, and Mike are the groom’s maids/men. Liam is the ring bearer. Cora is their flower girl. Jordan is holding the little ones.
Who did the most planning? Peter did, he choose all the fashion, the venue, paid for the wedding, got the caterer and the florist. (though Chris tried to pay for things as did Noah, but Peter wouldn’t have it. They bought the rings and Peter’s suit for him as ‘retaliation’.)
Who stressed the most? Noah is the most nervous. The last time he walked down the aisle was over 30 years ago. What if he forgets his lines? Is this the right call? Is he doing right by his sons? By his daughter? Did he forget his ring? Oh god, what if the others realize what a fuck up he is?
How fancy was the ceremony? - Back of a pickup truck | 2 | 3 | 4 | Normal Church Wedding | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | Kate and William wish they were this big. (They rented a place, invited closest friends and family but kept it on the down-low.)
Who was specifically not invited to the wedding? Kate, Gerard, Elias.
Sex:
Who is on top? They switch, all of them like to top and bottom and they’re not picky on who gets to be on top/bottom. Things just happen.
Who is the one to instigate things? Usually Peter, but Chris or Noah (especially when they team up) can be real degenerates as well.
How healthy is their sex life? - Barely touch themselves let alone each other | 2 | 3 | 4 | Once a couple weeks, nothing overboard | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | They are humping each other on the couch right now (They’re not shy about their sex life and very much enjoy each other’s bodies and closeness. It’s a great way for them to strengthen their relationship.)
How kinky are they? - Straight missionary with the lights off | 2 | 3 | 4 | Might try some butt stuff and toys | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | Don’t go into the sex dungeon without a horse’s head (They’re into toys, bondage, breeding kinks, biting/marking, dom/sub play, public sex, and some other milder kinks, nothing too crazy but also not too vanilla.)
How long do they normally last? Depends, if they’re fired up and excited they might not last long, 5-10 min, but if they go slow and steady they might also last for 20-30 min.
Do they make sure each person gets an equal amount of orgasms? They try to, usually, Chris has a few more than the other two, but that’s more due to Noah’s age (once he comes he can’t it up for a while. He may still be fit, but he’s not superhuman like Peter.) and Peter’s sensory overload after an orgasm. Chris is the only one of the three that can quickly come multiple times
How rough are they in bed? - Softer than a butterfly on the back of a bunny | 2 | 3 | 4 | The bed’s shaking and squeaking every time | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | Their dirty talk is so vulgar it’d make Dwayne Johnson blush. Also, the wall’s so weak it could collapse the next time they do it. (It really depends on their mood)
How much cuddling/snuggling do they do? - No touching after sex | 2 | 3 | 4 | A little spooning at night, or on the couch, but not in public | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | They snuggle and kiss more often than a teen couple on their fifth date to a pillow factory.
Children:
How many children will they have naturally? Between the three of them? Peter has two (Malia with Corinne, Jackson with Margaret (Betty)) Noah has three (Identical twins Stiles and Mike; Mieczyslaw & Michał and Liam; Milian), Chris has one (Allison). So they have 6 children already, Chris gets pregnant with twins after their night in the cabin. That would put the tally at 8.
How many children will they adopt? Chris adopted Isaac officially in this universe. Erica and Boyd are more or less adopted as well as Danny.
Who gets stuck with the most diapers? Peter, and he doesn’t mind it one bit. He didn’t get to change any diapers for Jackson or Malia. And since Chris carried the twins and gave birth it only seems fair he gets stuck with diaper duty. Noah and Chris teach him the ropes. He gets surprisingly good at juggling two babies, a diaper bag, and a set of keys/other items while keeping everything under control.
Who is the stricter parent? Chris. Noah tries but is too soft most of the time or too chaotic, and Peter just can’t say no once one of the kids pulls puppy eyes.
Who stops the kid(s) from doing dangerous stunts after school? Chris is best at stopping them, Noah tries to but due to his job can’t always keep an eye on them. Peter comes with them to let them explore but safely. He protects them while they do stupid shit.
Who remembers to pack the lunch(es)? Chris. He’s got the whole routine down to pat and is a streamlined machine in the mornings. Noah still can’t wrap his head around it. Peter’s still not used to having the kids with him 24/7 since both of his were adopted by other people, so he’s still learning the whole stick.
Who is the more loved parent? They love them all equally. Noah is the parent they go to when they need to talk about their feelings or need hugs, Chris is the parent they go to for advice and cuddling, and Peter is the fun parent who they go to when someone is bothering them. Peter also comes up with the best revenge schemes.
Who is more likely to attend the PTA meetings? Peter, he loves to hear how his kids are doing in school and doesn’t mind to absolutely obliterate their teachers if he knows a teacher is picking on his kids. He lives for shit like this as the rich house husband to his two working husbands. Also, the opportunity to brag to Karen about the kids is too good an opportunity to pass up.
Who cried the most at graduation? Noah, he’s just so proud of his boys up there.
Who is more likely to bail the child(ren) out of trouble with the law? Let’s face it, it’s Noah. He technically has to make sure that the law is upheld, but when it comes to his own kids, he’s not above giving them a pass. Though he’s more lenient towards kids in general. But yeah, Noah will most likely try and bail his kids out. Peter would let them steam for a few hours in a “You got caught, you deal with it.” Kinda way and then bail them out after a few hours. Chris would let them steam for a bit too and then determine how big the offense was before bailing them out.
Cooking:
Who does the most cooking? Chris, he’s the most practiced and most efficient. Though Noah loves to cook Polish food and bread. Peter does it when both of his mates have to work or are too tired to cook. He’s getting better at it.
Who is the most picky in their food choice? Peter. Werewolf senses mean he has a fussy pallette. He hates most vegetables for one. Though he has competition in Jackson, the little shit is a regular Gordon Ramsey.
Who does the grocery shopping? Peter, since Noah and Chris, tend to work during the day and he’s more of a stay-at-home house husband and dad. Chris gives him the lists. That doesn’t stop him from sneaking in snacks and candy for himself, Noah, and the kids. If possible, Chris likes to do the grocery shopping so there are no secret snacks.
How often do they bake desserts? At least once a week. Whether it’s for bake sales, PTO meetings, birthdays, weekends, a tryout, there’s always a baked good on the kitchen counter.
Are they more of a meat-lover or a salad eater? Peter and Noah are more Meat lovers. Chris is a mix between the two. He likes salads and meat but doesn’t have a preference over either. Unlike the other two.
Who is more likely to surprise the other(s) with an anniversary dinner? Peter, he takes them out to a grill restaurant. It doesn’t have to be fancy, but the quality has to be outstanding. They get their older kids to babysit and let them order anything they want as a reward.
Who is more likely to suggest going out? Once again, Peter, I feel like Noah or Chris would be more likely to be home dwellers and Peter’s the one that takes them to bars, musicals, restaurants, malls, etc.
Who is more likely to burn the house down accidentally while cooking? Noah, he’s not a bad cook, but he gets distracted by everything else and forgets he has pots/pans on the furnace.
Chores:
Who cleans the room? Chris or Peter. Noah tends to leave things everywhere and though he tries his best to clean up, the other two usually beat him to it.
Who is really against chores? Noah forgets to do them sometimes, but I feel like none of them is actually against them. Peter doesn’t like to do them but he likes a clean house, so.
Who cleans up after the pets? They have eight kids, a bunch of werewolves, a banshee, a kitsune, a hellhound, a Seelie, and god knows what else running around on the full moon. You think they have room for a pet???
Who is more likely to sweep everything under the rug? If we’re talking a literal rug, it’s Noah. Out of sight, out of mind. He also tends to stuff clutter in random drawers or closets.
Who stresses the most when guests are coming over? Chris. It’s his training and a bit of an OCD thing. “No, you don't get it Noah my love, EVERYTHING has to be spotless...” Cue Chris running around with a vacuum cleaner and a mop. “It’s just Melissa & Derek for wine night...”
Who found a dollar between the couch cushions while cleaning? Chris, and he puts them in the fun jar that they use to reward the kids. Once the jar is full, they go shopping or do another fun activity with the kids. Bad behavior/swearing gets money removed from the jar and into the dad jar. That money is used to give Chris/Peter/Noah an extra outing if the kids were particularly difficult.
Misc:
Who takes the longer showers/baths? Noah is a slut for long showers/baths. It’s his moment of relaxation.
Who takes the dog out for a walk? Noah occasionally walks Peter in his wolf form. At some point, people think Peter is a K9 unit, and Noah rolls with it. Which opens up opportunities for Peter to stay with Noah at work.
How often do they decorate the room/house for the holidays? Every year they decorate for Christmas, Thanksgiving, and Halloween.
What are their goals for the relationship? To love and support one another through anything and to keep a fun and raging sex life well into old age. But mostly to love and cherish one another and build each other up just the way they are.
Who is most likely to sleep till noon? Chris if you let him, training and habit have him up early, but his natural sleep cycle is to sleep like a log and to Noon.
Who plays the most pranks? Noah, he’s a mischievous little shit that loves to pull pranks on people and very sassy to boot. Where do you think Stiles, Mike, and Liam have that from?
#ben says stuff#teen wolf ask meme#chris argent#noah stilinski#sheriff stilinski#peter hale#chris/peter/noah#the DILF club#The way I tend to be#Anonymous
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Witness. (We’ll do the dishes together, D.O)
Another request done! I hope you enjoy it! <3
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From the outside, it would look like a completely normal dinner between two newlyweds, until someone would look closer. Until someone would see your leg bouncing up and down, see that his grip on the cutlery was far too tight.
No one could blame either of you, when the sun was going down and you were targeted by one of the most dangerous vampires in the country.
"The food is really good, Irene." That wasn't your name. And as if it belonged to someone else, you smiled softly at the man sitting across from you.
"I'm glad you like it, Ben." That wasn't his name either, but that's how the witness protection program worked. Relocation to a different town, a set of new names to get used to, a whole new appearance that you had to become comfortable with, calling a complete stranger your husband, and all through that still fear the time when the sun ran behind the mountains.
Looking at him sitting across from you, you studied his face. It was so strange to call him that, since the name Kyungsoo became a synonym of savior to you. He didn't look like a Ben. Only the name Kyungsoo fit him. After all, he was the one who ripped the centuries old bloodsucker off you during the raid of one of the biggest blood brothels on the continent.
A raid that you had helped create. A raid that put the blood mate of the owner and dangerous gangster behind bars.
Tap, tap, tap, the heel of your slipper slapped against the floor, almost inaudible to your ears, but most probably annoying to the police officer looking at you. The after-effects of being bitten wear off very slowly, and the itch under your skin was still present, a sultry feeling that coaxed you to find a vampire that could feed on you. Kyungsoo cleared his throat, smiling at you.
"So... how was your day?" you knew you should act as if you were just a normal couple, but how can you answer to a question like this? Of course you stayed at home the whole day, keeping away from the sunlight that could hurt your skin form being used as a blood whore for such a long time.
"It was...I read that book you recommended, it's really nice." you tried to sound excited about it, but reading the tips to self-defense from a vampire wasn't anything that could be categorized as easy reading. And just like the book recommended, you made sure every room had a small stash of religious icons that could be used against the undead soldiers if they would ever breach the threshold of your house. Shaking your head to push those thoughts out, you resumed talking.
"I umm...I also, cooked? And I don't ache that muc-" your statement was cut off by the sharp hiss coming from the werewolf, his eyes staring you down. No abnormal talk at the dinner table, rule #5. You immediately shrunk down, shoulders hunched, biting back the apology that was coming from your throat.
You missed the furrowed brows that sat on Kyungsoo's face, rubbing at his chin. A nervous tick, the only one that let you know that deep inside his mind, he was bemoaning the way he cut you off. There was a very low chance that the house was bugged- he himself had checked. There was even a lesser chance that someone was lurking around the perimeters of the house, waiting for a single clue to let them know who the two of you really were. With another clearing of his throat, Kyungsoo started eating again.
"What else, something interesting on TV?" Kyungsoo tried to restart the conversation, but it felt like it couldn't be saved, and you stood from the table at the same time he spoke.
"I'm not hungry anymore, I'll...I'll just go wash up! Yes, so the food on the pans won't dry up and stuff," your explanation was most definitely lame, but it was easier than to be with the werewolf in the same room in that moment.
You felt immense guilt when talking to Kyungsoo. It has been days since the two of you entered the witness protection program. Days he has spent away from his pack, days he had to spend babysitting a blood whore who is crashing from her high. He never seemed to mind, but you couldn't believe that he was doing this voluntarily.
The raid was a blur in your memories, the only pillar of stability being the grip Kyungsoo had on you as he took you from the red satin room, one arm holding you under your knees and the other's grip in your hair to bury your face in the crook of his neck, to prevent you from seeing what was happening around the two of you. And once you caught a glimpse of your former customer on the bed, ribcage ripped open and heart still fighting the silver stake that was slowly but surely coaxing it to stop beating, you decided that you didn't want to see more.
You don't even know how long it took, but when it was all over, you found yourself in the hospital with other of your co-workers, medical staff fluttering about you in white coats and trying their best to rid you of the bad blood coursing through your veins. Some of the older blood whores weren't happy with it and tried to fight the doctors that were taking away the only source of their short-lived happiness.
This house could be the set of a commercial, you thought as you looked at the bright and cheery tiles, marble green fridge, kitchen counters running under the window leading out to the street. Several utensils were cluttered on the surface, evidence of your effort to cook something edible (you did a good job, even if it needed a bit more seasoning). Glad that Kyungsoo did not follow you, his round eyes seemed to understand whatever you needed at a specific time, you stepped to the sink and began to wash dishes.
There were many rules you were supposed to keep up with- if you remembered well, there were around 25 of them to keep in mind, and thus you thought it was hard sometimes to obey all of them. Some were understandable, such as not leave the house after dark and make sure all the entrances to the house were locked and secure. There were others that did not make sense that much, like close the blinds when you were going to sleep. One would think that having the sunlight enter as quickly as possible would be a good thing to prevent vampires, but you weren't the expert on hiding from a very angry bloodsucker.
Washing dishes was something you always enjoyed, funnily enough. It brought you peace, and you could zone out while the almost hypnotizing circles with a sponge washed all the grime and grease from the utensils, making them as good as new. During that, your mind always cleared, and you stared into nothingness.
And in the nothingness, he stood.
At first you did not notice him- how could you, in the dark setting of the street, nothing seemed out of place. It was only after you realized that it was all too silent, as if someone just froze time that you saw him.
Standing on the other side of the street, partially hidden by a white van, Minseok seemed to attract all the darkness that gathered in the middle of him. Even when he was that far away, you could clearly see his face, already rid of the allure he hid behind when he stole new bloodwhores and seduced potential business partners.
His hollowed-out cheeks stretched out thin, making his face look ghastlier than you ever saw it. His eyes were huge, a striking red against the white background of his skin, his jaw loose, fangs peeking out.
The edges of your vision became fuzzy as you started shaking, the spoon in your hand cluttering into the sink. Once he knew you saw him, his eyes suddenly turned black, black holes that seemed to suck you from your fake kitchen in your fake home, away from your fake husband and into the bottomless depths of despair. Fear squeezed around your heart when you heard the voice of your previous owner in your soul, promising a very long and painful death for what you had done to his business, to his love, to him.
You felt as if you were caught in the darkness for years, fighting against the shadows that grabbed at your wrists and ankles and throat, that hoped to find any way to get inside you and make you burn from within, until you were yanked back, back from the despair, and back into the fake kitchen of the fake house and into the arms of your fake husband.
Kyungsoo was standing right behind you, arms wrapped loosely around your waist as he ran the tip of his nose over the arch of your neck, plush lips swooping down for an anchoring kiss every now and then. He must've felt you return, as his hands slid down to yours, entwining your shaking fingers with his stable ones.
"We'll do the dishes together, hm?" he said out loud, louder than you thought was necessary. You realized that it wasn't for you, it was for the creature of darkness that slinked back when he saw Kyungsoo standing behind you. No longer under Minseok's power, you let out a breath as if you were underwater for ten minutes.
"O-Okay." trying to gain control of your body was still impossible, and Kyungsoo was the only one that kept up with the pretense of washing dishes, while you held your hands under the warm spray of water to bring life back into them.
"Are you okay?" this question was much quieter, directed into the skin of cheek, where he pressed another lingering kiss. With the kiss came the calming wave of his scent wafting over you, most possibly trying to battle the scent of death's grip that was on you just moments ago.
"He saw me. He...I don't know..."
You don't know if you gave him permission to enter, you wanted to say, but the words couldn't leave your mouth, as your eyes watered.
Minseok was nowhere in sight. He could be in the house at that moment.
He could be right behind you.
"The dishes will wait until tomorrow, but I won't. Come on, dear, I missed you." more of his performance, you thought as Kyungsoo spun you away from the sink and to the staircase. Before he turned to leave himself, he made sure to press the panic button conveniently pressed under the kitchen counter.
It was only a number of minutes before the other police officers came and made the move to arrest the renegade vampire. A number of minutes that he could make use of and decorate the safehouse with your insides.
Kyungsoo seemed to be doing everything in his power to keep the organs in your body, as he urged you into the master bedroom, ignoring the large bed in the middle of it and heading straight to the walk-in closet. There, in the smallest corner behind an array of white shirts that Ben was supposedly wearing to work on a daily basis, the wall was slightly different. It gave way under the right palm print, and when Kyungsoo pressed his hand against it, the wall revealed a small panic room, just big enough for the two of you.
It seemed to be great timing, because the only sound you heard as the doors shut tight behind the two of you was the front door breaking under the force of Minseok's blow.
The world was swallowed in darkness and silence, and it was eating you alive. You suddenly wished you could hear everything that was happening in the house, because like this, you didn't know where he was, didn't know how close he was to you, if he was standing right in front of your hiding place and working on a way to get inside...
"Shh...you're hyping yourself into a panic attack." Kyungsoo whispered and he ushered you into his embrace. It would be a joke to call this a panic room; it was a panic cupboard, just big enough to fit you and not draw any attention to supernatural intruders. When the monsters outside were strong enough to plow through whole walls, the best way to stay hidden lies in the size of the rooms.
The two of you were sitting, the room barely big enough to not have to tilt your head at an angle. After he made sure that you were inside, Kyungsoo turned to press his back against the entrance and folded over you to shield your body with his own.
"What if he...if he finds us?" your voice was breathless, and all your other musings were shut down by the police officer behind you, chest rumbling against your back in silent warning.
"The force is on the way; this panic room is protected. I'm here, ___. I won't let him get to you, just like I didn't do so all those times before. Just breathe for me. In, and out. Slowly, like this." his chest moved up and down in exaggerated breaths that you tried your best to mimic. You weren't sure if it was the breathing, or the fact that the grip you had on Kyungsoo's arms was able to anchor you, and you didn't let yourself go to a flurry of emotions that would have you screaming out and blocking your breath.
"I'm sorry I snapped at you at dinner," Kyungsoo murmured into your ear, running his fingertips up and down your arms when he was satisfied with your breathing. You almost let out a shaky chuckle. Out of all the things to do, to be apologizing for something like this...
"It's...It's okay, I broke the rule..."
"It's not okay, you were trying to talk about your improving health. I'm sorry I didn't give you the support. I really am happy that you feel much better, though." you hummed, grabbing at the fingers of his hand when they came down to your wrist.
"I'm glad you liked the food." you whispered back, and a ghostly image of a smile appeared on your face.
"That is, if lying isn't a part of the witness protection as well." Kyungsoo chuckled, squeezing at your fingers. Warmth seeped from the sound, and it made your clenched muscles relax.
"I would never let the line of duty get in the way of culinary honesty, ___. I swear, it's as if you didn't even know your husband." he mocked in a shocked tone, and if you had more space, you'd smack him for it.
The lighthearted atmosphere was torn to shreds by a sudden, sharp sound. Three knocks, a pause.
Three more knocks, and a strange sequence that had Kyungsoo pressing at the panel once more. Wordlessly, he helped you get up, offering only a small smile of support.
Off to another city you go.
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