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#i just have so many books to read that i already own and yeah they're more classics and academic
kunaigirl · 1 year
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Happy Disability Pride and awareness month! Let's talk about Epilepsy!
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Hi there! I got tired of seeing my condition (that impacts my literal every day life) being left out or forgotten about during discussions about disabilities, so I made my own post about it! Let's go!
First Off! What the heck is epilepsy? Epilepsy is the fourth most common neurological disorder in the world, and it's a chronic medical condition. Epilepsy is a brain disorder that causes recurring, frequent, triggered, and unprovoked seizures to occur.
The official Epilepsy Foundation describes seizures as follows: "Seizures are sudden surges of abnormal and excessive electrical activity in your brain, and can affect how you appear or act. Where and how the seizure presents itself can have profound effects...Seizures involve sudden, temporary, bursts of electrical activity in the brain that change or disrupt the way messages are sent between brain cells. These electrical bursts can cause involuntary changes in body movement or function, sensation, behavior or awareness." (Source link)
Sounds like a lot of fun right? This is our life. Even with medication, we can be VERY limited to what can be safe for us. Seizure medications are NOT a cure, they only exist (at least as of now) as a tool to help have your seizures less often, or be triggered less intensely. Even on medication, seizures can still happen.
If you have epilepsy as a child like I did, it impacts your entire growing and developing experience. I spent MANY times as a child in and out of hospitals, neurologist and specialist offices, an getting so many EEG tests done. The pain of scrubbing the glue out of your hair for DAYS is horrible.
At a young age my seizures were so frequent and serious, it impacted my brain's ability to retain information. I had to re-learn the names of things at age 8 and 9. I had to re-learn HOW TO READ at age 10. I had to be home schooled because the public school system of my state at the time refused to work with me. I have VERY distinct and vivid memories of crying over my little baby ABC's book that I needed as a 4th and 5th grader. I knew I should've known this by this age. I knew that at one point I already did, and it was TAKEN FROM ME.
As an adult, I'M NOT ALLOWED TO DRIVE A CAR. And I can NEVER go to see a movie in theaters or go to see concerts or live music. There are entire TV shows I don't get to see. I can't go to clubs, arcades, dances, or raves. I miss out on A LOT of fun things. I always do, and I'm WELL AWARE of the fun I'm missing out on. The social, casual, and fun life experiences I'll never get to have. That WE'LL never get to have. And oh yeah! Seizures can KILL SOME OF US. Yep.
And the list goes on, and every person with epilepsy experiences it differently. There are multiple different types of seizures you can have, they're NOT always convulsing on the floor. For example, I have complex-partial-myoclonic-seizures. Meaning my muscles DO twitch when I have seizures, but I'm not always completely unconscious and sometimes I'm even able to stay sitting up. However, I'm still very "off" and can't focus or remember much for a good while after the fact. I can't talk or communicate during one, even with my slight bit of consciousness.
My experiences are not universal, I just wanted to talk about it and bring it up. It helps to talk about it even a little bit. Here's more about different kinds of seizures. Here's more about common seizure triggers. Here's more about CORRECT seizure first aid. And here's more general information/resources.
Please stop leaving us out of disability awareness. Please stop ignoring us or saying we're "not really disabled" or anything else like that. Please. Why does it always feel like the only people who care about epilepsy, are people WITH epilepsy? We're so tired of being ignored by others who don't have our condition.
If you're an epileptic person reading this, I see you. I love you. You're so strong, we all are. I believe in you, I believe in us. We're so much stronger than we get credit for, and it's going to be ok. Your anger and frustration are valid. Your emotions and struggles are real. You're valid, and I see you. Hang in there, we got this.
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astarionancuntnin · 1 month
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Hyello! I don’t know if you do requests but I thought I’d ask so the request is that x reader is honestly pretty badass and Astarion does something that pisses her off and so she barges into his tent after a long day to tell him off and fight him but decides that amidst the anger there is also hunger and decides theres a a way he can make it up to her and smutty content insues, preferably very like animalistic?? think closer by nine inch nails lol i do like the idea that they're both fighting for dominance in the interaction, you choose which one wins lol hope I’m not bothering you
did i listen to closer on repeat to bring you this? perhaps
and i never really put it out there, but hell yeah im taking requests! thank you for being my first <3
(also thank you for your patience i was heavily focused on my last chapters for die for you before approaching this ask and then it really went overboard LMAO you said "animalistic" and i took it literally, i hope you enjoy!)
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Run, Little Fox
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pairing: astarion x reader!ranger!tav
rating: E
word count: 5.1k
cw: 18+. smut, biblicaly accurate Astarion primal!astarion, predator/prey, knife play (if you squint), rivals/hate sex, mildly dubious consent, fighting for dominance, p in v, blood/vampire bites, creampie, very slight somnophilia (but id rather mention it, never too safe)
read on ao3
or keep reading down below~
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That’s it. 
That was once too many.
This brat of a rogue had gotten on your nerves more times than you could recall, and today you decided you had enough. Your group trusted and respected your position as their leader, a brave and cunning ranger whose decisions everyone agreed with — as they were for the greater good — so why couldn’t he do the same? It wasn’t enough that he questioned your every move in front of everyone else, no, he grew bored of you ignoring his remarks. He just had to act on his impulses and get you in trouble this time. 
You had intended on getting information out of a group of adventurers, when he had tried to pickpocket them in the middle of your discussion, and when he got caught, things obviously went south. You tried to talk things down, but they wouldn’t hear it. One thing led to another and next thing you know, they laid in a pool of their own blood and you stood with no more information than you started with. All of it, because of him, and he had the gall to say it was your own fault for not defusing the situation better. Really?!
The stress of this adventure — the impending doom that those tadpoles in your brains were — was already enough weight on your shoulders, you didn’t want to deal with Astarion’s trickery on top of it anymore. No — you couldn’t. You had enough of his unnerving attitude; enough of his shameless flirting when it was clear you weren’t interested; enough of his impetuous disdain and insolence that matched your own. Tonight, you would set the record right.
Once back at camp after this horrendous, unending day by his side, the first thing you do after dropping your loot and equipment at your tent, is bolt straight for Astarion’s. 
Still covered in a mix of your sweat, today’s unfortunate souls’ blood — and your own — you burst through the entrance of Astarion’s tent without so much as a warning to find him peacefully laying, with one arm behind his head and the other already flipping through the pages of a book he had found, and most certainly stolen, during today’s stroll.
He barely lifts his head to notice your intrusion, his eyes darting your way, half-lidded. “Looking for a cuddle?” 
The sheer audacity of the smirk he gives you. 
“You—” You fully step into his tent, staring him down with an anger that couldn’t be contained, as you close the flaps behind you, “Have been a pain in my ass for long enough.”
He scoffs, “Darling, we haven’t been close like that yet — unless this is your way of asking?” He closes his book and puts it aside to focus on you, as he rests on his elbows, his taunting smile never leaving his lips. What you wouldn't give to wipe it away from his smug face.
“The last thing I want is you anywhere near me.”
“You see,” he checks his nails, bored. “I have a hard time believing that, dear.”
“Get over yourself.” You cross your arms over your chest, annoyed at how well he could annoy you. “What makes you think I want anything to do with you after the commotion you caused today?”
“For one, you came to me, in my tent. If that's not a dead giveaway, I don't know what is,” his eyes dart back to you. “And to further prove that point, you still haven’t left — even though you claim I am the reason for your frustration. Really, it's as if you relished my company after all.”
You open your mouth to contradict him, but your words are left hanging when he gets up, his shirt slightly unbuttoned revealing the lines of his muscles concealed underneath and you can’t help but let your eyes wander longer than you intended, gulping as you do so. He chuckles lightly before he speaks up again.
“Secondly, I’ve seen the way you’ve been looking at me.”
Your eyes shoot up to his face again, and you ask defensively, “Would you rather have me not look at you?”
He gives you a mischievous look as he eyes you up and down, and he meets your gaze with just as much intensity.
“Third, and lastly, I can smell you, darling.”
“I haven't washed yet.”
“You know that isn't what I'm referring to.”
Your heartbeat quickens, as the air seems to draw out of the tent, “Well, whatever you think this is, isn't your doing,” you lie plainly in the hopes he buys it, but his smirk leads you to believe he sees right through it.
“You’re not fooling anyone but yourself, dearest.” He tilts his head, a long silence settling in between the two of you, with your breathing as the only sound audible in the space of his tent. “Maybe… There's another reason you might be frustrated. That all this, pent up anger building inside, is because of something else that you can’t control.” He closes the distance between the two of you, stopping but a whisper away from your face, and his voice gets lower, deeper. “Something that you would rather not have to deal with, but for some reason just can’t get rid of. Something that just rubs you the wrong way, and is the same reason why you can’t help but want to stay in my presence.” 
You scoff, challenging his gaze, “If that something you’re referring to is you, Astarion, then you’re right — you are the sole reason of my frustration as of late, but I could do without your irritating presence.”
“Oh, but I could make it much more pleasurable.” 
You lean back, and turn your head aside, trying to make some distance between the two of you, ”You give yourself too much credit.”
He slides a finger down your throat, leaving an unexpected shiver in its wake as he exposes your neck, when he pushes your vagabond strands of hair away, before he continues.
“Why don’t you give me a chance to show you exactly what I mean? We would both benefit from this, really; I could fix your predicament, and in exchange, I could receive… a little something from you in return.”
You contemplated the opportunity laid before you for just a second before opting for the reasonable choice. You grab his hand, pulling it away from you and when you speak up again, the anger in your voice is gone, leaving place for your much smoother, yet very assertive tone. “If you want my blood, you’ll have to earn it.”
You release his hand and he keeps it in the air where you left it, cocking his head to the side as he looks at where your hand had held him, “Earn it, you say?”
You nod, “We wouldn’t want you to become soft now, would we?” A smile of your own takes place on your lips. “If I am to be your meal, it’s only fair that you work for it.”
His eyes dart back to yours as a smirk appears on his lips, “I’m all pointy ears.”
“I’ll be hiding in the woods. If you can find and catch me, you get to drink from me. But if I catch you instead, you’re never getting a drop from me.”
He sighs, “That’s hardly a fair proposition, darling.” As you’re about to contradict him, he continues, “Here’s mine instead: if you catch me, fine — I’ll keep chasing boars and whatnot in the woods — but if I catch you…” He leans over the crook of your neck, whispering. “I get to drink from you every. night.”
You grab him by the chin, bringing him face to face with you, “If I catch you, you don’t get to put the party at risk anymore. You will be kicked out of the camp if you do.” If you had to put your vitality on the line, he had to bet something just as valuable.
His fangs glow in the faint lighting of his tent as he smiles. “Deal.”
You drop his chin as he steps back and you notice how something about him seems to be shifting; the pupils of his eyes widen, darkening; his own breathing stops; the hands at his side turning into claws, with his long and sharp nails peaking out, ready to hunt. There was nothing left of the rogue in distress that you picked up a few weeks ago, who could’ve pretended to be nothing more than an innocent, but rather pale, elf. 
When he opens his mouth to speak again, you spy his elongated fangs; much longer than you remember them to be, and his voice—
“Run.”
You don’t lose a second more; the vision of nightmares before you triggered your fight or flight reaction and without your weapons, the choice was clear. You turn around and slide through the flaps of his tent, bolting straight for your tent, where you quickly manage to pick up your trusty dagger and your set of bow and arrows.
Thankfully, everyone else at camp had gone off to bed, so no one notices you as you pick a frantic run towards the deep woods, making distance from the hungry vampire on your tracks. 
The woods are dark, with only the faint light of the moon guiding your tracks. Once far enough, or so you think, you hide behind a tree to control your breathing; you had no intention to lose to this, you needed all the advantages you could get. With your experience as a ranger, you were almost assured to catch him off guard.
Almost.
What you had seen in his tent before sprinting off was like nothing you had ever seen before. Of course, you knew Astarion was a vampire, but this was… different.
Terrifying. 
A beast, straight out of those scary bedtime stories you recall from your childhood; a monster guided by his thirst for flesh and blood, who would show no mercy, no remorse. It was merely enough to make you question this challenge with him, Gods, how embarrassing would it be to lose your life to a stupid game you had initiated purely out of spite?
The rustling of leaves nearby brings you back into focus, the adrenaline in your veins keeping you on edge for any sound. You ready your bow before you peek out of your hiding spot to aim where you heard the sound and wait patiently for another moment, your eyes never leaving the bush right until you hear another crack — right when you release the arrow, your aim striking true as you hear a loud thud. You wait a few more seconds, and when no sound can be heard from the bushes you leave your cover, advancing towards your prey. When you push the branches away, you’re face to face with none other than—
A boar.
Shit. Well — guess you caught your next meal.
Another rustling of leaves has you drawing out your bow again, ready to strike, but you’re unable to tell where it comes from.
“How does it feel, little fox?” You hear him through the woods, his deep and raspy, but unnatural voice almost echoing through you. “To be the one being hunted?”
“I’m hunting you, too, in case you forgot,” you mumble mostly to yourself, not wanting to draw out more attention and telling on your location. 
Although you were confident in your capacities, you couldn’t deny the fear building up in your chest. The unnerving feeling of knowing he was around, knowing he was onto you, but unable to find him through the dense woods, the reminder of what he looked like before you ran for your life, a creature of darkness—
“Keep running, you delicious little thing,” his voice already seems to be coming from somewhere else, where exactly you couldn't tell, as if he was constantly moving and it came from everywhere all at once. “You’re making this too easy for me.”
Damn him. He could be anywhere, it was useless to stay there, out in the open, when he was clearly onto you. Then again, he could also intentionally be pushing you to run, only to lead you into a trap of his, right where he wanted you to be. 
No, you’re smarter than this. You won't let your emotions get in the way of this: you were a hunter, born and raised for this kind of situation.
He is just another prey; you can outsmart him. You are better than him.
You put away your bow and arrows; you know your long range weapons would be of no use to you if you couldn’t see your target. If he’s trying to make you run, he has to be further ahead, so the smart choice would be to go back on your tracks.
You turn on your heels in a heartbeat and start sprinting in the opposite way, not even bothering to look behind you for any sign of him, as you hear the clear rustling of branches around you. At this moment, you know he’s right on your tail, the sounds of the forest barely covering the sound of his own movements between the trees — if that was even him. You assume it is, but who’s not to say it isn’t just another boar? Either way, all you can do now is keep running, hoping he will tire before you.
But you were against a creature of the night, someone — or rather something, now — much more in its element, in the darkness of the woods, than you were. 
You don’t run for long before you stop abruptly in your tracks to change directions, leaving the clear road for the crowded forest, where you think you could lose him.
You're temporarily reassured when you don't hear him anymore, and allow yourself to breathe again. Your heart is pounding in your chest, faster than ever, as the fear of being chased — of your life being on the line — created a warmth within you that pooled right down to your core. The risk of being caught, as for once you’re the prey, and you can’t explain it, but it excites you. Although Astarion had gotten on your every nerve, you had to give it to him — he was right that his unnerving attitude had gotten a rise out of you in the most carnal way — but you’d never admit it to his face.
A good minute passes by with no sign of him, and you feel safe enough to peek out of your hiding spot, investigating the beaten path for any sign of life. When you’re met with a dead silence, you move away from the tree you had been leaning against, only to come face to face with Astarion, who drops from the branches just above you. His eyes are somehow a much deeper shade of red, his pupils fully blown out, and he even seems taller as he smiles down on you, and that’s when you perceive the additional fangs that appeared next to the smaller ones you knew. 
You’re fixated on his sudden presence, assessing your opponent the way you would a wild animal, and you remain unmoving, focused on your own breathing.
“Nowhere left to run, I’m afraid,” the voice that comes out of his mouth is otherworldly, almost a growl and nothing like his sultry voice he used to try and charm you before. It’s as if anything that once made him pass as a mortal was gone the second you ran off from him.
You want to turn around and sprint in the opposite direction, but he's faster than your thoughts. Before you can even move a finger, he grabs you by your neck, his sharp nails digging into your skin enough to draw blood as he pushes you against the nearest tree, slightly lifting you from the ground. Instinctively, you reach for your dagger, but he is fast to catch onto your intentions and takes it away from you, throwing it on the ground far from reach. With no other options left, you reach for his hand around your neck, trying to hold on as your vision blurs from the chokehold he had on you. 
“Caught you, little fox,” he leans into your neck where you bled from to breathe you in, and licks your skin from the bottom of your neck up to your jaw, tasting your sweat mixed with the dry blood left on you. Your camp clothing leaves you dangerously exposed as opposed to your armour, and he had every intention to take advantage of it. “You will make a fine meal indeed.”
He presses his entire body against you, and you can feel not only his oddly cold breath down your neck, but also his hard bulge rubbing against your navel, right above the heat between your legs. 
A particularly bad idea crosses your mind, and you know you’ll blame it on the lack of oxygen later, but for now, it’s the only option you have.
Your hand slides down to his crotch, where you squeeze his length through his trousers, making him shudder against you and loosening his grip on your throat. You take this chance to free yourself as you quickly push him away and against the earthy ground of the forest, pinning him down using your entire body weight. You land right next to your knife and grab it just in time before he comes to his senses, now holding it against his throat.
“I win,” you say, breathless, over him.
You remain unmoving, with the threat of your knife keeping him in place, but unsure what to do next — until he laughs. You’re taken aback, but you keep your position, pressing your blade deeper into his throat.
“Well done.” His voice softens, still deeper than what you’re used to, but less guttural than it was a minute ago. “You have me completely and utterly helpless. What will you do next, I wonder?”
You don’t get to answer before you feel him moving under you, his hardness rubbing against that sweet spot between your legs. Your breathing quickens once again, caught off guard by the delicious movement of his hips against you.
“What do you think you’re doing?” You ask, the words almost getting stuck in your throat.
“Fulfilling my part of the bargain, of course.”
“That’s not—” he lifts his hips higher, the tip of his crotch rubbing against your clit, and your body tenses at the contact. He’s rock hard and between your thin camp clothes, it's almost as if you were rubbing skin to skin against each other. A pleasurable shiver running across your spine, and you allow yourself to close your eyes for just a moment, fighting between giving in to your desires or stopping yourself from letting this go any further; it was clear which side of you was winning over, as your hunger for that something more was becoming impossible to ignore. You soften your grip on his wrist and your dagger against his throat, and that’s all he needs to gain back dominance over you, flipping you back under him and seizing your wrists to pin you down the same way you had him only seconds ago.
“Now,” he says, “this is much better, don’t you think?”
“Oh you prick,” you groan, fighting to free yourself from his grip on you, but he only tightens his grasp around your wrists. His immortal strength beats yours and your hand twists under his crushing grip, making you finally release your knife.
You curse under your breath for letting yourself be bested by the most annoying member of your party; the one who you had dreamed to put back in his place was now dominating you instead. A mix of anger and shame swirls in your stomach, along with something else that you want to deny, but can’t for the life of you understand.
Your eyes meet his, dark and hungry and so incredibly close to you. His lack of breath is strange in comparison to yours, so heavy that your chest rises with each breath you take, brushing against him. It wasn't a position you were used to, either, and you find yourself liking it more than you thought you would; with his entire body pining against yours, his legs surrounding yours and keeping them closed together, your wrists held strongly above your head; a prey caught by her predator.
You remain unmoving in this position for what feels like an eternity, until he licks his lips, his eyes falling to the space in your neck that was exposed just for him.
He leans into you, his deep voice shooting a warmth straight to your core. “This little game of yours made me quite hungry.”
You gasp when you feel his bulge rubbing against you once more and touching that sweet spot that made you rub your thighs together. 
“Perhaps,” he whispers, “you've grown an appetite of your own, little fox?”
You take a few breaths, "If you wanna feed, be my guest. You…” you sigh, defeated. “You earned it. Just— be quick about it.”
You turn your head aside, looking away and giving him space to feed, only for him to lean back, “Quick? Oh darling, you’re mistaken if you don’t think I won’t draw this out as long as I possibly can.”
He pushes your wrist up above your head where he can hold them both with one hand, while his other hand slides down to your chest, his sharp nails grazing against the curve of your breast. You close your eyes as his hand continues its journey down your navel, and into your pants, rubbing against the moist spot that kept growing in your panties.
“But don’t worry — I’ll make sure we both get our fill tonight,” he growls.
Your hips move of their own accord, wanting more of him and his touch, almost against your own will.
“Greedy, greedy, little fox.” He flashes a toothy smile, “Can't get enough? I'm not surprised.”
Your eyes open back up and you stare at him, frustrated, “Gods, do you ever shut up?”
“You have such a way with words.” He sighs, pulling his hand out of your pants. “You know, it's a wonder we haven't gotten killed because of your social prowess.”
“If you think you’re so much better than me, why don’t you—”
His lips collide with yours into an hungry kiss, one bold enough to shut you right up. A part of you is disgusted, furious, even, that he would push himself onto you, but your body’s reaction betrays you, as you kiss him back with the same intensity. It’s sloppy, his elongated tongue invading your mouth and rubbing against yours, until he bites into it and sucks, letting your crimson hit his lips. 
You moan as you pull back, rolling your tongue around to feel the puncture he made, and he smiles down on you, his teeth tainted by your blood.
“Ah… delicious.”
Something comes over you, a supernatural strength — almost animalistic — and you flip him back around on his back to take control once again. Your dishevelled hair frames your face over him, and he gets to see you panting, teeth bared, with angry eyes towering over him. There's a flash of surprise in his eyes before they take back their lusty look, and his hands fly to your shirt, ripping it open as his nails tear through the fabric as if it were air. Your shirt is quickly discarded, exposing your skin to the cool night air that raises the hairs on your back.
In the frenzy, you give the same treatment to his shirt, using that strength to destroy his clothing and revealing the very muscles you spied earlier in his tent. He raises himself up to meet you where you sat over his hips, his mouth finding yours  and kissing you feverishly as he did before, while his hands work to remove your pants. 
With a grunt from him, you're pushed back on the harsh forest ground where he rips away your trousers, leaving you only with your panties to cover you. You gasp into his mouth, breathing in his cold breath, when the night air that matches his breath hits the thin fabric of your undergarments. The shock of temperature affects you more than you had anticipated, as you are completely soaked from your arousal that had pooled down there since the beginning of the night. Astarion instantly notices it, and laughs ominously.
“Are you still going to deny it now?” He pushes your underwear aside and slides his dexterous fingers between your folds, discovering just how dire your situation is. “Hells, look at how wet you are, just for me.”
His fingers feel good, and fucking Hells you didn’t want to admit it — he was an absolute asshole — but that ship had sailed a while ago, and now you just wanted to know how good he would feel inside you.
“If you still want to feed, you better do it now before I change my mind,” you groan.
“Change your mind?” He scoffs. “I'm afraid that isn't an option. I won fair and square, little fox; now I get to devour you every night.” He flips you around, the sudden roughness of the earthy floor rubbing against your sensitive nipples making you gasp in surprise. You feel him move behind you, and you're not sure how or when it happened, but he must've removed his own trousers as you feel the ghost of his cock hovering just over your entrance. Your heart threatens to burst out of your chest with anticipation, and this feeling goes into your throat when he grabs you by the nape of your hair and pulls you into him, making you arch your back and clearly exposing your neck to him in the process. “Starting tonight.”
Within the same beat, he thrust into you, his hips slamming hard against your skin, and his fangs dive into the crook of your neck, finally taking what is rightfully his.
You cry out at the stabbing pain in your neck, this one much more different than the first time he bit you, as his elongated fangs dive deeper into your neck to draw out more of your life source, and the additional fangs leave more marks into your skin. It hurts and yet, you find your core growing warmer and wetter; between his bite and his reckless thrusting into you, with the added sensation of his initially cool skin getting warm from your blood. His thrusts gain in speed and force, and in that position, there is nothing else you can do but take it.
Even as you try to reach behind you with that last remaining will to have control, to grab his hair and pull him forward, Astarion takes a hold of your arm and pushes back against you, using his entire body weight to hold you firmly against the rough ground, and his hips to slam into your needy, little cunt. With your hair still pulled back, but your wrist now stuck in his grasp, he continues to take his fill of you with no restriction.
“Look at you, finally put in your place,” he growls as he licks up the drops of blood leaking from the fresh wounds in your neck. “Is this what you’ve been desiring all these times your eyes got lost at the sight of my body? What you’ve been dreaming of? To be properly used, like a bitch in heat? Ravaged by a beast?”
You manage to get a few words out between rushed breaths, sneering.
“F— Fuck. Y— You.”
He snickers wickedly, “I guess that answers my question. Don’t worry, pet. Your secret’s safe with me.”
“Oh you—”
“Shh now,” Before you can even finish your sentence, his hand quickly moves from your wrist to your mouth, muffling any sounds coming from you. “We wouldn’t want to risk waking our dear friends, now, would we? Unless that’s what you want?” You groan in the palm of his hand and he chuckles. “You depraved little thing. I’ll give you just what you desire.”
His hand previously holding your hair goes down your body to hold your hips in place as he fucks you, and his teeth sink into your shoulder on the other side of your neck. The gesture meant only to keep you steady as he fucks you senseless. With his fangs deep into your skin, his nails cutting the soft skin of your hips and his dick pounding your abused cunt, you scream into his hand as you reach your climax. It’s nerve wracking, mind shattering, and leaves you completely drained. 
With a final push inside you, Astarion’s hips still and he growls into your neck, taking his last sip of you, as he pulses around your inner walls, filling you up with his warm seed. Your muscles fail you, as your body goes limp against the earthy ground, and you barely feel anything else — leaving you almost unconscious. Behind you, Astarion pulls out of you, and a weak moan escapes you as you feel his load leaking out of you.
While you’re recuperating from this treatment, Astarion loses his monstrous features: his nails retract, his pupils go back to those annoyingly charming red ruby eyes, his fangs retract just enough to fit back into his mouth, and he mimics breathing again; now passing as a mortal again.
With the minimal strength you manage to gain back, you push yourself up, and gather the few pieces of clothes that were shredded during your nightly session; tomorrow you would definitely need to find new camp clothes, these were the only ones you had and they were utterly ruined. Thank the Gods everyone else was fast asleep and you’ll be able to walk back to your tent without any remarks.
As you’re about to take your leave, completely disregarding the rogue who looked just as messy as you were, you hear him clear his throat.
“It’s always a pleasure to be doing business with you, my dear. I’ll see you tomorrow night.”
You roll your eyes before shooting him a glare. “Don’t push your luck.” Your cheeks still flushed, your hair all over the place, and your form barely clothed, making you not as convincing as you had hoped for. 
You only catch a glimpse of his smirk in response to you as you walk away, and when you catch yourself actually looking forward to it, you tell yourself it's only for the opportunity to put him back in his place. 
Perhaps another white lie to coat your true feelings, but no one needed to know about that.
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tag list (comment or message me if you want to be added!): @grimistheangerinmystares @silverfangmarks @roguishcat @nyx-knox @anacdoce @jwera @annnagennnie @angeldarkness95 @marlowethebard @hellethil @frankie-mercury @ariajc79 @lets-just-daydream
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quartzalynlove · 10 months
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Dating Johnny Cage Would Include
Pairing: Johnny Cage (mk1) x reader
Summary: hcs about dating our favorite movie star
Warnings: none
A/N: I've got so many Johnny ideas running around this head
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Alright let's cut to the chase
This man's love language is gift giving
Jewelry, clothing, shoes he's buying it all for you
You know in Iron Man 3 when Tony bought the giant Christmas bunny for Pepper? Yeah expect something like that from time to time
But he's also very sentimental and will buy you things he knows you love/will make you happy
That book you've been talking about reading all year? He'll surprise you with it on a random Tuesday just to see you smile
And don't be a collector or something
You like mugs? Funko pops? Magic the Gathering?? He's the sole sponsor of your collection
His net worth may be in the millions but nothing he owns is worth more than pure joy on your face
Speaking of your face he's constantly trying to get you on the screen
Whether you think you have talent or not Johnny just wants your perfect being captured on film
"C'mon, doll, I found auditions for a lead in a rom-com. You'd steal hearts on the big screen!"
Lord knows you've already stolen his
The man's a huge kid and nerd at heart so if you're also a movie buff he'll be on cloud nine
He hasn't had many people to talk to about the magic of entertainment since his mom when he was younger
The two of you would lose track of time talking about the good, the bad, and the cheesy of movie history
This also means he will talk and flirt with you almost exclusively in movie quotes
And if at any point you start thinking they're cheesy he'll switch it up with an expression bc he knows they always make you laugh
While he is silly, nerdy, and impulsive Johnny also values quality time with you
He wouldn't trade his job for anything in the world but sometimes it's a lot
Sometimes he just needs a movie night you
Nothing but the two of you cuddled on the couch, a bottle of wine, and the entire Star Wars saga
He could never thank you enough for supporting him and in turn he fully supports you in all of your passions
Imposter syndrome and insecurity are not allowed in the house
For every flaw you see in your work he will list 10 things he loves about it
"I know it's hard not to feel like this, but even when you can't believe in yourself, I'll always be your cheerleader."
Where's his favorite place to kiss you? Where isn't
It all depends on which part of you looks most kissable at any given moment
He'll kiss your lips, cheek, forehead. He'll even kiss your stomach totally unprompted.
Got freckles or beauty spots? He's abt to become a problem
In his eyes, you're walking cinema that he can touch, taste, and love. He wouldn't miss a second of you.
Bottom line: Johnny's happiness in life is bringing joy to the world and you're no exception
The smiles of millions of his fans at Cage Con is only equal to one of yours
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parad-ice-lostandfound · 11 months
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Prompt: The Prefect and their friends talk about the events of the Glorious Masquerade and come to some... rather belated conclusions.
Pairing: GN!Prefect/ Yuu/ MC with Deuce Spade, Epel Felmier and Sebek Zigvolt (Platonic)
Genre: Crack
TW: Slight spoilers for Book 5 of Glorious Masquerade.
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AN: So... finally read the ending of Glorious Masquerade. I have very many feelings about Malleus and Rollo (obviously) but I also have many feelings about the Prefect's immunity to the firelotuses that everyone so conveniently forgot. In Idia's words, they're all a bunch of 'unga bunga, brute force' kinda people lmao-
This is also my first time writing for Sebek and Epel so I'm very nervous lol. If they seem out of character or something else seems weird, let me know!
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"Man, I'm beat."
Deuce flopped onto your bed, sinking into the soft mattress with a sigh of relief. You smiled at him, running a comb through your hair to remove any tangles in it.
The two of you were already in pyjamas, tired from a night of dancing and socializing. You were waiting on a few more people though.
"Did you tell Epel and Sebek to meet us in my room?" You asked him as you ran your comb through your hair. The older students had to report the entirety of the previous night to Professor Trein, so you had decided that the first years could have their own tea-spilling session in your room. Grim, however, wanted to hear the heroic tales of the older students (and regale them with his own, no doubt) so he was with Professor Trein instead of being with you.
"I told Epel" his voice was muffled as he spoke, face smushed against the pillow. "He said they'd be here-"
Knock, knock. "Prefect? Are you in there?"
You walked over to the door, opening it to find Epel and Sebek, both in their pyjamas as well. Epel smiled at you, holding his hands behind his back, "I got Sebek like Deuce told me to."
"Human, what is the meaning of this?" Sebek huffed, too tired to yell his words like he usually did. He crossed his arms over his chest, narrowing his eyes at you. "As a retainer of Malleus-sama, I must get the required eight hours of sleep to continue to serve him diligently. How dare you keep me up after a night of saving the entirety of Twisted Wonderland from those abysmal flowers, and another night of merry-making?"
His words lacked their usual fire, so you just gave him a cheeky smile and pulled the two of them inside, closing the door behind them. "Come on, I just wanna talk to you guys. Besides, I have snacks."
Epel gave you a side-eye, trying to keep a cheeky smile from forming on his face. "Vil would be so mad."
"What Vil doesn't know won't hurt him~" you hummed, and Epel giggled. Sebek just sighed, taking his place on your bed after nudging Deuce a little.
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"And then, when the flowers started climbing up his tail, he climbed onto Professor Trein's shoulder!"
"What?!" "Oh my-" "HOW ILL-MANNERED!"
You giggled at the reactions of your friends as you recounted Grim's actions. The four of you were sat on your bed. You were sitting with your back against the headboard, a pillow on your lap on which Deuce rested his head. With his feet planted on the bed and his knees in the air, his legs made a backrest for Epel who leaned against them, sitting with his legs criss-crossed. On your right side sat Sebek, with the snacks you four were sharing in the middle of the bed.
"I had half a mind to pull him off Professor Trein, but before that, the Bell of Solace rang," you hummed, messily braiding Deuce's hair as you spoke. "And then all the flowers wilted, and well, you know the rest."
"I still can't believe Grim tried to climb Professor Trein," Epel giggled as Sebek shook his head. Deuce sighed, looking up at you, "Well, I can't blame the little guy for being scared. Those flowers were no joke."
"Yeah, for you guys maybe. For me, they were just plain old flowers, if a little persistent and irritating," you shrugged.
"What?"
"Magicless human, remember?"
All three boys looked at you like you had grown three heads and burst into song and dance. You gave them a defensive glare, "What? I'm just saying, those things were perfectly harmless to me."
"....Yeah... Wait, does this mean we could have just sent you up to ring the bell?"
"Probably not...? I mean, Rollo was there on the top guarding the bell wasn't he? If he used magic against me, I'd be defenceless."
"Well, Rollo seemed a bit... partial towards you? You could've tricked him like you did with Azul-senpai that one time..." Deuce trailed off, and the four of you took in his words.
There was a moment of silence before-
"YOU MEAN TO TELL ME THERE WAS NO NEED TO PUT MALLEUS-SAMA IN DANGER?!"
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hi, so remember that one odile looping au where she was instead in sasasap? yeah, I thought more about it. There's some writing accompanying the art under the cut~! (though uh, warning of. self-harm implications at the end?? our dear odile is Not Doing Well!)
It's been a good few loops since you'd been in the House with the rest of the group. After an... event you're not going to think about, you'd spent a good amount of loops going through the Dormont library, reading through any and all books you could get your hands on.
(No familytales, which you feel bitter about. You're stuck in this hollowed out state, not allowed to progress further, but not allowed to end, and you can't even have that. You came here to try and connect with a part of your own heritage that was taken from you, tried to learn more, to hope that maybe you'd find some sense of belonging that you'd been missing. And now… Now, you're barely even living. Barely even-)
…Returning to your original train of thought, it's been a while since you made your way through the House. You hadn't seen much point in it, to be quite honest. It's not like you can beat the King.
(After all, you've tried so many times already, and nothing you did worked. Not trying to hone your skills through fighting the sadnesses scattered around the House, not through a thorough inspection of all the rooms, not through trying to outsmart the King, nothing you did worked. There's that one attack, just that one attack that the King uses, and maybe if you'd just be able to avoid it you'd be able to defeat him-)
(But you've tried. You've tried, and he always uses it, always kills you before you can even tell the Child to run. You should have never let yourself agree to bring them with you, but you can't bring yourself to try and spare them of this now. They're a part of your group, and you promised that they could come, and you don't want to disappoint them, even if you can't even beat the King, even if the first time around, the Chosen was-)
You take a deep breath. You are not facing the King this loop, you will not see it, so it doesn't matter.
(You don't know whether he kills the Chosen so brutally when you're not around. After all, in the last loop you faced him, he hadn't wasted waste any time in dispatching you at all.)
(…You're unwilling to find out how things play out when you're not there, but for her sake, you hope it's quick.)
(And it's not like it matters, when you're the only one to remember.)
(…The only one. The only one. The only one the only one the only one gems who even are you at this point something jagged and pulverized to small bits until everything feels like a blur and you can barely hold your thoughts together you don't want to be here please someone anyone get you out of this hell you don't want to see them die again you-)
You hold back a sigh. Annoying. All these thoughts and feelings are so annoying. There's something else you should be focusing on. After all, there's a reason you neglected to wrestle the lead from the Trapfinder, letting yourself trail behind the Chosen. A reason you hadn't pushed, hadn't reached for the control of deciding where to go (even if it caused the Trapfinder to feel useless, even if it made them feel unneeded, you couldn't bring yourself to care, to regret, not when you were losing your mind having to see them examine the exact same rooms, the exact same things every time like clockwork, not when you knew exactly where to go to progress and had specific things you wanted to check-) There's a reason.
After all, you know that, even without your input, the Trapfinder will find the way through the House. You can trust them to do that, at least.
This, in turn, gives you time to think. And you need that. Because for this loop? You're planning to go to the House library for the first time.
And you have to figure out a way to get your group to let you do that. Because, despite everything, you still care what they think of you on some level. You don't want them to worry about you. To know that you couldn't figure this out. To-
You do.
So you wonder. Because, you'd heard them talking about you on the way up to the House. You may not care to bother with trying to decipher what exactly they're planning to do, how much they've figured out, but you're sure they've noticed how off you're acting. And you don't think they'd allow you to stay by yourself in the library, not without having a Talk, and that's not something you can afford to have.
The Trapfinder runs into another sadness, and you don't even notice until a stray scissors attack cuts into your side. The Chosen quickly heals you, sending you a worried glance as she does so, but you don't pay it any attention because…
You think you just found your way through.
(You wonder how badly you'll have to injure yourself so they let you stay behind.)
(It's not like it'll last anyways.)
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olderthannetfic · 2 years
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Something that frustrates me about the Harry Potter conversation is a lot of people missing the point behind the motivation to boycott it. They seem weirdly focused on the content of HP when it's actually... not that bad? It's not perfect, in fact a lot of aspects are pretty fucking problematic and worthy of discussion, but not uniquely so by the standards of the fantasy genre. Yes, I know the goblins are clearly drawing on anti-semitic tropes. Yes, the house elf situation is fucked. Yes, lots of not-like-other-girls-style misogyny. Yes, Cho Chang was a fucking disaster of racism. I KNOW THIS ALREADY! I'm not an idiot and Harry Potter fans were talking about this for far longer than JKR has been a TERF. But I'm also a fan of the Elder Scrolls and Dragon Age and the Witcher and a shitton of isekai anime and tons of other fantasy medias which are so much worse. Harry Potter is only moderately problematic by the standards of most popular fantasy media, especially for the mainstream standards of the time period it was written. Worthy of criticism, but not dropping it entirely. And actually reading HP and looking back at JKR's behaviour at the time, much of it seems largely unintentional, just that JKR drew on a lot of fantasy tropes that she didn't properly examine as well as her own unexamined biases and she had some flawed understandings of progressivism that were fair for its day but don't fly now, but doesn't seem malicious. The actual authorial intent at least seems to be pretty progressive at least, even if the execution wasn't the best. And sure, it's not a masterwork but there's a reason it connected to so many people, even if a lot of it was luck and timing. We don't have to ignore that and doing so feels dishonest.
I'm just so annoyed when people try to shit on the contents because they're missing the point and confuse the actual problem in a way that weakens their argument. I don't give Harry Potter money anymore because JKR crossed some lines for me in real life, totally separate from Harry Potter as a piece of media, and I don't want to fund her bullshit because she is so influential it is hurting people. The content of her books is utterly irrelevant to this decision. She could have penned a goddamn magnum opus and it wouldn't have mattered. So I'm sick of people bringing up books that are "better" or ragging on the contents of Harry Potter because none of that is the point and never was the point and it comes across as just taking advantage of a shitty situations to dunk on a popular thing or those who enjoyed it. Yeah, it was a mediocre fantasy series. But it hit the right emotional escapist buttons in a lot of kids even if it had the moral nuance and depth of a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles anti-drug PSA. Having to drop it sucked for a lot of people because it can't be replaced and yelling about how bad the writing was doesn't change that because it never was about quality. JKR's TERF transformation was in many ways a betrayal of JKR's intended audience considering how the text preached acceptance and love and starred an abused, unwanted child getting to go to magic school where he's special. Pretending Harry Potter should be dropped because its content has issues obscures the actual problem of a raging transphobic having money and influence and that not everything created by bad people is poor quality so boycotts might require giving up access to things you actually like or are valuable and that's not always an easy decision to make.
JKR was a probably decent person with fairly liberal politics when she wrote Harry Potter. The books, while imperfect, are not more horrible or full of problems a dozen other popular fantasy properties. JKR become a TERF later in life and while she may have had ingrained transphobia prior to this when she wrote Harry Potter, that is not the same as the virulent hate-movement she's part of now and we should recognize how easy it is for people to get drawn into hate-movements. Any argument to boycott should be about how she's using her money and influence to affect real life laws and attitudes unless you want to try and get people to also drop half the fantasy genre.
--
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eyesofshan-if · 9 months
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what are your favourite IFs and ROs?
oooh... juicy 🧃to be honest, i haven't had much time to read other ifs, so i don't know that many of them! but here are the few that i'm actively follow and obsess over (and look up to as literary masters because gosh)
infamous by /infamous-if. literally everyone and their mother knows this if and what can i say 🥲 i'm one of the many sheeple too. i'm so obsessed?? with the way amy writes messy relationships and people because i could never make them feel natural. like i try and it just reads like two toddlers squabbling in a parking lot. somehow she manages to make writing a fictional song in a fictional music competition fun. the ros feel like living breathing people. it's amazing to read and to learn from. but yeah august, seven and orion all have a vice grip on my heart
/merrycrisis-if and /collegetennisoriginstory!! i'm head over heels for three out of the four ros in the tennis game. allie's diction is so good and flows so well it intimidates me. like where is this vocabulary coming from. the words are so light?? and there's an upbeat feel to each sentence and the pace feels like skipping home after a long day ends. how is there humour that is actually funny in every sentence. why am i already in love with the ros even though i've only spent one scene with them. truly the slice of life god. she's making me want to go to university but i am already!! in university!! and disclaimer its nowhere near as fun 🥲!!!! i use her work as a writing study for my own 😭 g, rayyan and SAMMMMMM!!!!! gods i want to hold them in my hands and go 💋💋💋💋💋
other ifs i follow are ATOC (it got me into the if community and xelef? mwah mwah), golden rose, fallen hero (ortega my love), the exile and when twilight strikes. but it's been a while since i've read them so my memory might be a little rusty. still, they're all wonderful books and i check up on them from time to time :))
if you have any recommendations though, i'm all for suggestions!!
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doylldonmagar · 10 months
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So I saw @hermesmyplatonicbeloved 's post and had some thoughts. I agree and disagree. I am a percabeth fan but I also know that some of it is screwy, and if you are familiar with my blog, you know this. I think RR screwed up and wrote out a LOT of trauma, I think he really should have dealt with that better. I think it's not good that he wrote trauma and mental issues and abuse into the foundation of many characters and then has ignored it when it became convenient for the plot.
I would love to see specific quotes and books for these because some of them I have no memory of and would like to revisit them.
I'm gonna talk my way through all of this so I'm gonna text break here
The first point is Percy scaring her to tears. I can only imagine in Tartarus? Like when they're both in their worst state? I don't know. I agree they should have talked about it, but I think they should have talked about all of HoH, which brings me back to saying: Rick really failed at dealing with trauma and processing and long term effects. Honestly, being scared *of* him, yeah I agree that's bad, but is that the situation? If she's scared by his power, then I'm not sure of where I stand on this, I don't know anyone with demigod powers, but I don't think I'd be scared simply because I know someone is capable of hurting me. Plenty of people are capable of hurting me. Like I don't know, what situation is this?
"Percy has been suicidal the whole time annabeth has known him, in BoO Percy attempts suicide and annabeth said nothing, noticed nothing" I'd really like a page or quote because i remember him being suicidal but never attempting. (Im rereading what i wrote, is this maybe referring to percy deciding it would be better if he drowned when hes with Jason? If so, I thought the book said annabeth wasn't told that he wanted to give up) But really my bigger issue with this statement is the fact that it's not necessarily a bad relationship just because a person doesn't realize someone is suicidal, or if their suicidal thoughts are fluctuating. If he's been suicidal the entire time she's known him, how should she know? And why is it the girlfriend's job to stop him from suicide? Like yeah she should care, but that's not her responsibility. No one should feel responsible for a significant other's suicide unless they encouraged the SO to do it.
The judo flip, I agree, annabeth should have been more sensitive to Percy's past and again, I blame Rick for conveniently forgetting that an abused kid is not going to laugh or even take well to being thrown on the ground. This also reminds me of a post I made a while back, because I was so frustrated by media portrayals of women getting upset (usually worried) about another character and shaking them or hitting them or using some form of violence, and that's portrayed as acceptable and normal and as a sign of love. I'm not a fan of that.
"Annabeth likes to keep percy on his toes" this point, I want specific quotes, cause I'd like to go over it again. I agree this is funky. Percy says he feels more comfortable with annabeth and feels like he can talk to her blah blah, but yeah, I think I remember him saying she makes him anxious and that's a problem for me. Like genuinely, to anyone who reads this: if your SO makes you feel uncomfortable, anxious, nervous, or unsafe, please reevaluate your relationship and be safe. That's not good. And back to percabeth, I'm really not sure why RR would say that.
Bringing up abusive stepfather. If annabeth didn't already know about Gabe...I don't know, that says to me that percy was too traumatized to talk about it, in which case, why can annabeth see it in his actions, his comments, his reactions? I don't know that either. But I do know that having met my fair share of traumatized kids, it's not at all uncommon for them to share trauma as a joke and for multiple kids to laugh it off, not to mention suicidal jokes or jokes about their own abuse. Now I want to be clear, I'm not saying that's healthy, I think that's bad, but I also think it's common. And if annabeth doesn't realize what he's really talking about, or is caught up in her own experience, or is uncomfortable, laughing is not an uncommon response. And I don't think that makes their relationship toxic. (And I'm saying it again: I think Rick wrote that so that people could say oh poor percy and feel strongly about how horrible the situation is, but he didn't want to get into the trauma, so by annabeth laughing it off, he can move on with the scene but include little details that show how bad tartarus is)
I don't remember any comments about poseiden, but I agree her interactions with Tyson are problematic. I have zero explanation or excuse, I really don't know what rick was thinking with that, unless it was maybe a way to signify how all halfbloods feel about monsters? (Now that I've said that, that kinda makes sense, if percy sees a monster who was his human friend, but everyone else just sees a monster who is just like the other monsters who have killed their siblings. But still. Annabeth saying he was gross was uncalled for, Rick could have said she was scared or concerned this was a trick or something, but disgust?)
I agree about Percy's unresolved trauma manifesting as fear of annabeth. I already commented on the judo flip, see comments above.
Percy absolutely has horrible self asteem. I'm not sure that's annabeths problem. Yeah she should support him in every way she can, but it's not her responsibility or anyone else's to make him feel better about himself. She should want to, and she should be positive and encouraging, but I don't think Percy's lack of growth is her problem or necessarily a sign of a toxic relationship. It can be, but I'm not certain it is in this case. I think, as I'm sure you know if you've read this much, Rick doesn't know how to write characters who are further along in their trauma- processing, healing, discussing- rick fails to deal with anything besides a currently traumatized kid and a unresolved but out of the directly abusive situation. (This is where I'd like to note, the whole seaweed brain thing, not funny to me, not cute. I'm not a fan because I do think that encourages negative self image. I am aware that that could be link to annabeths childhood, but again, I would expect her to be hyperaware of this sort of emotional abuse. And I blame Rick. Why does she never have her actual abuse mentioned?)
I don't recall annabeth pushing percy to choose between them. I would have said she had doubts about him still wanting to go to CA and he said that he regretted not being there for Estelle but didn't want to be without annabeth (which is kinda cute, kinda codependent to me, and I agree, codependency is not cute)
I would argue the last point "Percy has no interest in going to New Rome or University" is clearly false. In SoN (2nd book of HOO) Percy discovers there are full families living in New Rome, and how it's safe there, and he says multiple times that he wants that, how he remembers he had a girlfriend named annabeth and he wants her to be there and wants to be able to settle down *there*. And in ChaliceotG he's torn, because he does want to stay in New York for his mom and sister, but he really wants to be with annabeth and he loves new Rome. He says multiple times how he wants to go to New Rome. Its true, if the only reason he wants to go is for annabeth, that's a bit funky. But new Rome is the safest place for demigods, and he's been in wars for years, of course he wants that. And wanting to be out of school- okay? New Rome isn't just about the university, not to mention the New Rome university is focused on kids with dyslexia and adhd, obviously. So it will be tailored to him, his struggles are understood, accepted, and aided. Who wouldn't see the appeal in that?
And finally, I agree, that if a character or couple is going to have broad reach, they should be healthy. That's a problem i have with Colleen hoover and all her toxic relationships that have a large audience and are so loved by that audience. And back to this, I hate that the pjo hoo couples are so focused on in the books because fans always pay attention to the couples, but the focus amplifies them, and I think having a relationship be the main focus of a kids/teen/ya book sets up horrible mindsets, and idolizes relationships and all in all is not good for kids. Percabeth or not, healthy or not, I don't think the emphasis on relationships is good.
I might link some of my other posts that I mentioned or that address similar issues in the reblogs
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harrysmimi · 1 year
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DO IT AGAIN!
Synopsis: A day life of a husband of 11 years; A shortie Blurb.
More of my work
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Harry and YN have been together for 11 years, believe it or not, and married for six years out of them, with three kids.
They're as in love with one another as day one.
Many still root for them to break up one day. Especially since both of them are in public eye so much, Harry being the new pop star and YN being director and former actress.
YN have decided to rather to not let anything phase her and just be happy in her very happy relationship. Especially now with their three kiddos.
YN decided to make a Reels videos. She stayed away from Tiktok but Instagram is equally addicting. She had set up her phone on a tripod she once bought to use for her Vogue skin care routine video and it was abandoned since then. It was before the pandemic when she didn't had any kids. She was stood in the hallway by the master bedroom door, testing a few shots on her phone.
"Oh am I in your way?" Harry caught her attention, he'd come back from dropping the kids at YN's parents' as they both wanted to have alone time. The camera was already rolling.
"No!" She gasped in excitement. "Come here, I need you!"
"We're going to film it this time?" He raised his eye brow with a cocky smirk on his face as he padded closer to her, "and they said romance is dead."
"Oh shush!" She stopped him. "I'm making a Reel. I want you to do something."
"What do you want me to do?" He stood in front of her, basically towering her as how tall he is.
"I want you to do that romance book boyfriend thing, where he grabs the girl by the waist and lifts her chin with his finger." She beamed at him at like an idiot, excited idiot to be exact. She showed him how to, wrapping her own arm around his waist and failing to follow up with the rest of the part.
The thing is, YN have been now addicted to reading, Porn on paper kinda romance novels. It wasn't surprising for him as she'd keep sending him these videos saying, she's adding those to the her to be read pile. Let's be honest the girl is horrible at keeping up with the lists, so whatever helps her.
And Harry likes to feed into her mew obsessions, he bought her a Kindle just because. Whatever makes her happy, is his motto. And she don't have to wait for the book to arrive in the mail anymore.
"God why did I saw this coming?" He chuckled, but followed through.
He wrapped his left arm around her waist pulling her flush against his chest as he pinned her to the wall, forefinger under her chin as he gently lift her head until their eyes met, staring for a few seconds as he slowly pressed a feathery kiss on her mouth. That was cherry on tip!
That really made her go weak in her knees and she almost fell on her bum if it wasn't for him holding onto her. He laughed adoringly at her reaction.
"You're adorable!" He managed to say between his giggles as he carefully stepped away from her, watching her go all red and nervous.
"Do it again!" She exclaimed whilst dying sheepishly. And he did.
It was hilarious this time though because YN kept squealing and somehow turned more red. He still had that effect on her. Harry placed a tender kiss on her cheek before he was reaching to stop the recording on her phone and he was carrying her into their bedroom.
"Now I don't want you to wake up in the middle of the night to show me something your imaginary boyfriend did." He placed her on their bed as he kneed his way forward to hover over her.
Yeah, she wakes him up more than their kids wake him up at night. They're all boys and Mummy is their favourite, as traditionally cliche it sounds, it's truth.
And to her advantage he's better in bed that any of the book boyfriends. She missed it, especially when there are two toddler knocking on their door in the middle of the night asking to sleep in their bed, a baby who needs diaper change and milk every three hours. Life is hectic.
"Oh that's never going to stop." She challenged him.
"Yeah? Well the good thing we dropped off the kids at your parents' today, isn't it?" He smirked cheekily as he dipped his head down to smear his mouth on hers.
And oh boy, oh boy, did she had a euphorically tiring afternoon!
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N O T E:
Oh my god! Did I loved writing this!!!! 😭
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Tag list:
@vrittivsanghavi @buckymydarlingangel @sweetwritingfanficfriend @walkingintheheartbreaksatellite @sleutherclaw @melllinaa @michellekstyles @sunshinemoonsposts @marialikescherries @japanchrry @onlyangelrain @originalsoulcollector @harrysgirl-1d @lomlhstyles @im-an-overthinker
Lemme know if you want to added to the tag list
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borathae · 4 months
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Constellations
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"Even after all these centuries of living, they can experience something new with each other."
Pairing: Taehyung x Jungkook
Genre: Comfort Smut, Slice of Life Romance, Falling in Love!AU
Warnings: they're normally vampires but 'cause of magic they currently aren't, just read the mainstory to understand tbh lmao, a romantic date by a bonfire, romantic conversations & daydreams, soft Dom!Taehyung, sub!Jungkook, Tae is the biggest service Dom ever, Koo is so sensitive hihi, body worship, so many words of adoration, gentle touches, lots of sighs and whispers <3, frotting, lots of kissing, a gentle rim massage, cumming together, cuddles & snuggles, this is so romantic :(
Wordcount: 9.7k
a/n: i genuinely love this universe so much holy fuck :( also, big shoutout to @ahyeonah for helping with the French translations hehe thank you queen 💜 and another sidenote, italic in this chapter indicates that they're talking in Korean
《 Bonus Smut to this 》
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Taehyung finally comes back after having excused himself to go outside. Jungkook looks at him over the edge of his book, closing said book a moment later. He uses his thumb as a bookmark. He had been able to watch the older man scurry around the kitchen and hurry outside multiple times.
“You’re back”, Jungkook says, “where were you? ___’s grandparents already went to bed. Also, you missed one round of Uno.”
“That is alright. It is a terrible game, way too complicated. I always lose. Horrible”, Taehyung says dismissively and gives the dark haired man an excited grin, “I prepared something outside. Do you perhaps want to see?” 
“Is that why you kept going to the kitchen?”
“Perhaps.”
“Sure, I want to see”, Jungkook says and stands up from the couch to follow Taehyung outside. He used a pen as a bookmark, abandoning the book on the coffee table.
“May I? It is quite chilly outside and I wouldn’t want you to freeze”, Taehyung offers a jacket to Jungkook.
“Oh? Yeah okay, thanks”, Jungkook says giddily, smiling to himself when Taehyung helps him put the jacket on. 
The latter ends it with a caress to his upper arms and a kiss to his shoulder. 
“You look so handsome.”
“Thank you, Tae.”
“Come now, I shall show you what I have prepared.”
“I really wanna see”, Jungkook says and together they leave the house. 
Taehyung takes Jungkook’s hand once outside, leading the way. The latter was looking around the garden at first, but flusters when Taehyung intertwines his fingers with him. He glances at him, flustering even more when Taehyung gives him a sweetest smile. 
Taehyung leads him to the shed and then Jungkook can already see what he prepared. A bonfire. With blankets and pillows to get comfortable on. 
“Wow, you built a fire?” he gasps.
“Indeed I did.”
“It’s so cozy here. Wow, look at all the pillows. Wow Tae, you put so much effort into this.” 
“I really did”, he bounces excitedly, “do you like it?” 
“Of course I do.”
“I, I thought that today was such a wonderful day and you made me feel so good and I wanted to end it with something romantic.”
“It’s so romantic and so cozy.”
Taehyung glows upon being complimented, giggling excitedly. He gestures Jungkook to sit and so he does. Taehyung kneels down in front of him, shoving a charcuterie board into his vision.
“So that’s what you were doing.”
“Indeed. It is the only thing I can truly make. I hope you like cheese.”
“I do. It looks really pretty.”
“Thank you. Wine?”
“Sure.”
“I asked Harald for their oldest wine. I hope you enjoy red wine. Cheese must be enjoyed with a good red wine.”
“I like red wine. Thank you, that’s enough for the beginning.”
Taehyung prepares his own glass as well.
“Do you like to drink?”
“Yes, in moderation obviously.”
“Of course. I do not enjoy the taste of most alcohols, however, I quite enjoy the taste of wine.”
“It fits you.”
“It does?”
“Yeah. Wine’s elegant.”
“You believe me to be elegant?” Taehyung gasps.
“Yeah.”
“Oh”, he blushes, “thank you.”
“You’re cute”, Jungkook says and lifts his glass, “cheers.”
Taehyung clings glasses with him.
“To this relationship.”
Jungkook smiles, “yeah, to this relationship.”
They each take a sip, enjoying the full taste of it on their tongue.
“It is very good. The grape truly fills the taste and it leaves the tongue with an almost floral sweetness. Do you enjoy it as well?” 
“Yeah, it’s good”, Jungkook scoffs, “you talk so fancy sometimes. It’s not bad, but I can’t talk like this about wine.”
“Oh worry not, the way you talk is perfect. I am aware that I talk, well, that I talk rather strangely sometimes. I learned English during a time where such speech was common and I never really rid myself of it.”
“I like it. At first I thought that you were obnoxious and it annoyed me, but I like it these days. You would sound really weird if you talked differently all of a sudden.”
“I can talk in more modern ways. Oh heavens, I attempted to talk without the accent but failed miserably. I can talk modernly? Is that how the young people would say it?”
Jungkook laughs, “just stick to your ways, you old sock.”
Taehyung chuckles, lowering his eyes shyly.
“What other languages can you speak?” Jungkook asks.
“Oh heavens, far too many. English of course, French as well as German. I can also read Latin and Greek and know the lost language of Nilrem.”
“How do you know this language? I never heard of it before and I know that nobody really does in the common world.”
“I have many friends who are witches, but there were also times when Namjoon was…well, he was kind in his ways. Jimin and I lived side by side with him without having to fear for our safety and during such times, we liked to exchange knowledge. He taught us the language. He called it the original language of magic, but never told us that he was present when it was still used.”
“I see. Damn, I didn’t think that he would do such a thing.”
“I must admit that thinking back, such times feel very unbelievable in comparison to all the agony he allowed to happen to us.”
“I’m sorry, Taehyung. You didn’t deserve any of it.”
“Thank you, but may we talk about something else please? I do not want to spoil this night.”
“Of course. So you can speak six languages?”
“Oh heavens, no. I can also speak Spanish and Italian and spent quite some time in Portugal as well, although my Portuguese is a little rusty these days”, he confesses in a chuckle, “my mother language however is Korean, I still think in it sometimes.”
“Oh Korean? Of course it’s your mother tongue. It’s mine as well”, Jungkook says in their native language.
“You speak Korean as well?” Taehyung answers him in it.
“Of course, I do. I grew up speaking it and still talk in it with Hoseok and Seokjin-hyung when we’re alone.” 
“Oh Jungkook-ah, I feel so happy to know that you haven’t forgotten our language.”
“Me too. It’s been so long for you though, I’m surprised that you didn’t forget.”
“I almost did. Jimin reminded me of it when I met him. When we are alone, we only speak in it.”
“I get that. It’s nice to speak in a familiar language. Although I gotta admit that English feels like my second native language these days. I think in it and dream in it.”
“Yes, I agree. For me it is English and French.”
“French? Say something then.”
“Say something?” Taehyung lowers his eyes playfully, leaning closer until his lips brush Jungkook’s ear. 
Jungkook shivers, listening to the unfamiliar words and finding it very hard to concentrate. Taehyung’s voice is deeper when he speaks French, carrying a seductive romance to it.
Taehyung finishes his sweet whispers with a kiss to Jungkook’s jawline, straightening up.
“What did you say? All I understood was mon chèri.”
“Your company is brighter than any fire and your kiss tastes sweeter than any wine, my darling.”
Jungkook nudges Taehyung’s chest.
“Shut up, oh my god.”
“No, or how I would say it in French, no.”
Jungkook laughs, Taehyung laughs with him.
“You’re funny.”
“Thank you”, Taehyung says and takes a slice of cheese to eat it deliciously, “mhm, you must try the cheese. It melts on your tongue.”
Jungkook follows his lead, eating it with a frown.
“Mhm, it’s good.”
“Isn’t it? Oh Kook, I appreciate a good charcuterie board a lot. There is such romance in it. To prepare food for your loved ones, to present it artfully. There is no greater show of appreciation in my eyes.”
Jungkook smiles shyly, “you think so?”
“I do, yes. You told me that this is your first experience with queer relationships.”
“Yeah, you and Yoongi. Although, you’re definitely romancing me harder. No hate to Yoongi, he is very sweet when we’re alone and I feel really loved by him, but you are definitely romancing me harder.”
“Well, I want to make the first experience special for you. Which is why I prepared all of this. I want to make it special, I really do.”
“Tae, god”, Jungkook says, sagging his shoulders in fond defeat.
Taehyung takes Jungkook’s pointer finger shyly, “do you…uhm, is it how you wished your first queer relationship to go?” 
“I honestly didn’t really think about it a lot, but it’s definitely really nice. You’re so sweet and romantic, I like it.”
Taehyung relaxes, gazing at him.
“Shall we make rules?”
“Rules? Tae, I told you no control. You’re free with me.”
“I know, I know. It is not about control, I just”, he sighs in defeat, “I regret the way I treated you in the beginning. How I ran off to have blood orgies with Fringella or how I fucked around with strangers. I thought nothing of it as I have always lived my relationships in such ways, but it must have been painful for you.”
“It definitely was, but we already talked about it.”
“Well despite all that, this is your opportunity to voice your rules. ___ and I have rules as well. Do you wish me to stay in our polycule? Do you have any problem with me seeking out one night stands? Do you want me to be purely loyal to you and ___?”
“Oh that. I guess, the way it is right now is good for me. I don’t mind when you have one night stands. They’re definitely not something for me, but I know that you like them.”
“I can stop them if you wish me to.”
Jungkook shakes his head, “don’t change like this, I really don’t mind. One thing though, don’t abandon me during parties without saying anything and if you do want to use it as a sexual hunting ground, warn me beforehand. Also, if you ever make me watch you have sex, don’t let me witness you getting roughed up. It would make me so angry.”
“Angry?”
“I’d just wanna fucking protect you then.”
Taehyung flusters, touching his chest where his heart fluttered. He lets a shy giggle escape, meeting Jungkook’s eyes.
“But”, Taehyung pouts, “you cannot tempt me with a good time. What if I want you to get angry in sheer protectiveness?”
Jungkook laughs, “you don’t wanna see me angry, trust.”
“But I did, it’s the very reason why we are here now.”
Jungkook rolls his eyes, “you’re silly.”
“Silly for you, yes.”
“Tae, is the wine working?”
“Forgive me. No, I am just, I am merely…oh heavens, all this talk about you watching me have sex and using a party as our sexual hunting ground affected me.”
“It affected you?”
Taehyung looks at Jungkook’s lips. Jungkook looks at Taehyung’s lips.
“It did?”
They inch closer, craving the others’ kiss.
“It did.”
Taehyung closes his eyes, Jungkook cups his cheek. With a gentle push, Taehyung falls to his back, allowing Jungkook to climb his lap. Taehyung writhes under his weight, finding it hard to breathe normally. Jungkook sits on his thighs right under his crotch. Taehyung begins to crave his weight on it, gazing at Jungkook with blown out pupils.
“You’re so silly, Tae”, Jungkook whispers, straightening up and therefore denying him of his kiss.
“Don’t tease me, please.”
Jungkook chuckles, caressing his chest.
“I’m not.”
“Yes, you are.”
Jungkook smiles, but says nothing else. Instead, he looks to the side and picks up a piece of cheese to snack on. He bites it off in the middle, guiding the other half to Taehyung’s lips.
The latter opens his mouth and sticks out his tongue, trying his hardest not to whimper when Jungkook places the cheese on it. 
Their connected gazes never break as they chew the cheese, only once Jungkook studies the charcuterie board again does it finally break.
“Everything looks so good. I don’t know what to try next”, Jungkook says, keeping one hand on Taehyung’s chest and using the other to point at the different cheeses. 
“You should try Brie with grapes.”
“Then I’ll do that”, Jungkook shoves both into his mouth and chews, “mhm!”
He widens his eyes, looking at Taehyung.
“Do you enjoy it?” Taehyung asks breathily. One more second pinned down on this blanket and he might die from heart palpitations. He is so ardently in love with Jungkook that it is difficult to stay calm when he is caging him in. 
“It was savoury at first and then the grape burst and it got juicy and sweet. It tasted really good.”
“Didn’t it? I know how to enjoy cheese.”
Jungkook picks up Brie and a grape to guide it to Taehyung’s mouth.
“Open up.”
Taehyung follows, holding his breath. He never knew that his heart could flutter so incredibly much. 
“Good job”, Jungkook praises softly and feeds Taehyung.
He closes his lips around Jungkook’s fingers, sucking on them for a few seconds before he releases them and chews the cheese. Jungkook seems flustered and mesmerised by the gesture, staring at Taehyung’s lips.
He runs his hands over his chest mindlessly. Each touch leaves goosebumps behind.
“I can’t believe I hated you once”, Jungkook says quietly.
“Did you truly hate me?”
Jungkook feeds both of them a piece of cheese, then continues to talk while Taehyung is still chewing. He also sips on his wine occasionally, feeling the effect more and more. It is warm and makes him feel cozy.
“I hated all of you. Alpha, I mean. We always knew that you also lived in town and that humans never returned from your estate. At least that’s what we thought happened. I don’t think that Yoongi ever allowed humans to die willy-nilly on his grounds.”
Taehyung shakes his head.
“We still thought that all of you were bad vampires and when we heard that you infiltrated the university, we instantly joined as well so we could keep an eye on you.”
“Did you also convince the head mistress in quite magical ways?” Taehyung asks with a mischievous gleam.
“Do you really think someone like me could have managed to get in honestly?”
“Yes.”
Jungkook blinks in confusion. He didn’t expect this answer.
“You are intelligent and a hard worker. You are also a diligent person, who learns very quickly.”
“Oh. Wow, thanks”, Jungkook murmurs, lowering his eyes shyly.
“I mean it.”
“I know, thank you seriously”, Jungkook smiles.
Taehyung gazes, “but I assume that you also used compulsion to make it seem as if you had been students all along.”
“We did, yeah. Seokjin did all of it and he hated it, but we had to do it in order to keep watch. You know”, Jungkook chuckles, “if you asked me, it was so obvious that we weren’t students. The courses we attended made no sense major wise.”
Taehyung laughs, “mine did neither. I simply went with whatever sounded most interesting.”
“Same. That is if I was even present. I had to realise very soon that there were too many people around me.”
“I see. The scents.”
“Exactly.”
“I’m sorry, Jungkook.”
“Don’t. I feel better these days”, he assures him and smiles, “cheese?”
“Yes, please.”
“Any wishes?”
“Perhaps a slice of cheddar with onion chutney?”
“Sounds yummy. There we go, open up.”
Taehyung lets it happen with a dizzy head. What is happening to him? Can a heart truly feel so much for just one person? How do humans survive under such conditions? How do they not scream and screech from the intensity of such emotions? 
Jungkook, oblivious to Taehyung’s overwhelmingly fond gaze, chews on his piece of cheese with his big eyes racing over the dark night. And Taehyung wonders how many times he can call him beautiful before the younger man grows annoyed by it, but then he remembers Yoongi’s words. How there is never too much love, but only the wrong receiver.
“You are beautiful.”
Jungkook looks at Taehyung. His eyes are widened in surprise.
“You are beautiful”, Taehyung repeats it and it feels so good to do.
Jungkook smiles, lowering his head shyly.
“You’re beautiful too, Tae.”
“You are so immensely beautiful.”
“You’re just as beautiful, Tae”, Jungkook says and leans down to kiss his cheek, “you softie.”
He straightens up, smiling at him with soft eyes as his fingers trace his chest mindlessly.
“You are so beautiful.”
“You’re beautiful too.”
Jungkook scrunches his nose and giggles, “I like it when you’re like this.”
Taehyung might truly scream. His heart feels at its limits. It is racing so unbearably much that the word “racing” feels rather unworthy to use. What is faster than racing? Because whatever it is, his heart is currently doing it. Yoongi was right. There is never too much love, just the wrong receiver and Jungkook is the right one. 
“Why did you guys infiltrate the university either way? Were you planning on turning everyone?” Jungkook asks him then, still oblivious to Taehyung’s ever-growing feelings.
“Boredom.” Taehyung has to clear his throat before he can continue. The feelings were just too much. “It is truly as simple as that. We were fed up with our life and we wanted a change. Except for Yoongi, who only joined because he needed to make sure that we wouldn’t cause too much trouble.”
“Poor Yoongi. I bet he hated every second of it.”
“Why do you think that he was such a grumps at all times?”
Jungkook laughs, “you’re mean.”
“I am merely saying.”
“Yeah, yeah whatever. God”, Jungkook sighs and smiles fondly, “to think that the only person who actually got in legally was ___”, he hesitates for a moment, squinting his eyes in suspicion, “unless you guys had something to do with it.”
“Oh goodness, no. We had no knowledge of her existence. She managed to get in all on her own.”
“Wow, she’s so cool.”
“She truly is. You know, she allowed me to read the paper which granted her the scholarship and I must say that it is truly remarkable. She always undermines her intelligence and talents, despite being incredibly gifted.”
“I know, it’s so sad that she does that. She told me about her parents and what they did to her. I think they made her have such little confidence in herself.”
“I know. I truly cannot stand these people for the way they treated her.”
“Me neither. We have to hype her up a lot to show her how awesome she is.”
“Hype her up? What is that?”
“You don’t know what hyping up means?”
Taehyung shakes his head, “is it similar to complimenting someone?”
“I guess? I don’t know, I guess you can compare it to cheering someone on and giving them confidence through nice words.”
“I see, well that is a very positive word then. We shall hype her up even more from now on.”
Jungkook chuckles, “you old sock”, he teases, nudging Taehyung’s chin. 
“Hey! It is not my fault that the youths these days think up so many new words. I can simply not keep up.”
“Okay, okay fine”, Jungkook laughs, “you’re so old. I get it.” 
Taehyung pouts, “you are mocking me.”
“Yeah, I am.”
Taehyung’s pout grows. Jungkook wipes it away with his thumb, gazing at the older man fondly.
“It’s cute. I like how out of date you are.”
“This isn’t as much of a compliment as you think it is”, Taehyung complains, but laughs as he does it. 
Jungkook scrunches his nose, laughing with him. 
“Yeah, I kinda realised how mean that sounded. Sorry.”
“I forgive you”, Taehyung jokes. He feels happy right now. Honestly happy. 
Jungkook picks up a piece of cheese and snacks on it, following it up with some wine. Taehyung props himself up on his elbows and drinks from his own wine glass. 
“Cheese?” Jungkook offers. 
Taehyung opens his mouth and allows him to feed him, gazing at him the entire time. 
“Grape too?”
He nods his head. The fruit tastes sweet, but nothing beats the sweetness of happiness Jungkook allows Taehyung to taste with every smile.  
“Did you date when you were at university?” Jungkook asks.
“Not seriously, I mostly hunted for one night stands and short love affairs.”
“I see. That fits how you were back then.”
“It does. Oh, I was so unlikeable.”
“You really were. I couldn’t stand you at all”, Jungkook snickers, making Taehyung giggle.
“I am grateful that I changed.”
“Me too.”
Taehyung gazes at him, touching his thighs gently.
“I assume that you didn’t date either?”
“Oh hell no”, Jungkook scoffs, “I barely even went to class because all the smells were overwhelming to me.”
“I figured”, Taehyung places his hand on Jungkook’s waist, “I watched you sometimes.”
“You did?” Jungkook gasps.
Taehyung nods his head.
“On the rare occasions when you were present during rugby training, I sat by the oak trees.”
“The really old ones west of the field?”
“Indeed.”
“No way, I never noticed you there.”
“I hid quite well.”
“Wow, you creep”, Jungkook is laughing, “and you watched me?”
“Well, I watched the other men as well, but whenever you were present, my eyes only lingered on you. I truly wanted to have you.”
“Tae, oh my god”, Jungkook flusters, “why did you never approach me?”
“I truly wanted to. So one day, I followed you. I had my mind set on approaching you, but then I watched you get into Hoseok’s Beetle and everything fell into place. That the reason you were rarely present was because you were Jeon Jungkook, the young Ripper who is friends with the other two Younglings. Oh, my heart was shattered on this day because I believed you to be human until this point.”
“Oh god, I’m sorry”, Jungkook snickers, “you can be glad that you found out before talking to me though because I knew exactly who you were and with how out of control I was back then, I would have jumped at you.”
Taehyung laughs.
“Then I can be truly glad that I never approached you.”
“Yeah”, Jungkook agrees playfully.
They share a moment where their eyes get lost in the other’s and only the crackling of the fire can be heard. Taehyung, who has been feeling overwhelmingly in love with Jungkook, flusters first, averting his eyes to the sky.
“You can see so many stars here.”
“Mhm?”
“The stars are endless here.”
Jungkook gets off Taehyung’s lap, lying down next to him. He lets his eyes travel over the vast sky and the countless stars flickering far away.
“You’re right. They’re endless. Do you know your zodiac?”
“Pig.”
“That’s cool. Do you know your Western one too?”
“Oh? Forgive me. I am a Capricorn. Why?”
“Well you see, I’m actually a really big nerd for astronomy. This over here is my zodiac. Virgo.” 
He shows him the sign in the stars, tracing its shape with his finger.
“Truly?”
“Yeah and over there is yours”, Jungkook says, tracing Capricorn into the sky. “It’s the smallest constellation of the zodiac, but I think it’s really pretty. Its brightest star is called Deneb Algebi with a magnitude of two point nine.”
“Magnitude?”
“It’s basically how bright a star shines.”
“I see. And the brightest star in my zodiac shines with two point nine magnitude?”
“Exactly. Capricorn is also the zodiac with the softest shining stars. Deneb Algebi is Arabic and means tail of the ram. It’s this one here.”
“I see”, Taehyung speaks softly.
“It’s a very pretty star. I know a lot about stars, I really do.”
“I never knew that this is my zodiac”, Taehyung whispers, gazing at the stars with sudden awe. For the longest time, the stars meant hell to Taehyung. To die and yet continue to burn. To never find peace and rest. He felt like this for a very long time. He died and yet continued to live in hell with peace so very far away.
“Yeah, it’s pretty cool isn’t it? Over there is ___’s zodiac and I don’t know Yoongi’s so I can’t tell”, Jungkook explains, painting shapes in the sky Taehyung had never noticed before, but which are so overwhelmingly obvious to him now that Jungkook shows them to him. The stars have meaning, they create art. They glow and burn and with it, they create pictures for all living beings to gaze upon. The stars aren’t hell. They are art.
“They are beautiful”, Taehyung whispers shakily, holding back his tears.
“Right? I think so too. I always loved the stars. They brought me great comfort when I was still alone.”
The parallels steal Taehyung’s air. To think that there was a time where he and Jungkook looked at the stars at the same time and while Jungkook found comfort in them, Taehyung found sadness in them. The same view and yet it was received with such different hearts.
He looks at Jungkook. His dark eyes reflect the galaxies, his cheeks are glowing. He looks so happy, so utterly content. His life was filled with such tragedy and sadness and he still carries honest happiness. Taehyung admires this about him as much as he envies it. More than anything however, he is happy for him. And so utterly in love.
Such different hearts and still, they somehow managed to find each other.
Taehyung swears to finally show Jungkook his atelier and then take him to his secret library. Jungkook has never been in these rooms before. Time spent together was simply too short, life only recently calmed down. There was no chance for Taehyung to show Jungkook his rooms, but if he knew how much the younger man loved the stars, he would have shown him sooner. 
“I painted the stars once”, he tells him.
“You did?” 
“I did. I must show you once we are home. I still have the painting in my atelier.”
“Yes, I’d really like that”, Jungkook says, oblivious to what waits for him, “I think your art is really good. I bet your stars are so pretty.”
“If everything was different back then, do you believe that we could have fallen for each other?” Taehyung asks him quietly.
Jungkook looks at him. He didn’t expect this topic change. Taehyung’s eyes are glassy and filled with love.
“What do you mean?” Jungkook whispers.
“If we were normal and human back then, do you believe that we could have fallen for each other?”
“I don’t know. I think you would have been a total art nerd and I’d have been a stupid jock. Maybe we never even would have met.”
“No, I believe that we would have. I truly cannot see you as a mindless jock. You speak of constellations and the beauty of stars. You paint and draw and you enjoy music. Your heart is too gentle and filled with too much art for you to have been a mindless jock.”
“So I would have been an art nerd too?” Jungkook jokes to which Taehyung chuckles.
“Perhaps. Or perhaps you would have studied astronomy.”
“Thank you, you’re really sweet. You really are”, Jungkook whispers, looking at the sky with flushed cheeks, “would we have met as humans? I seriously can’t tell, but I hope that we would have.”
“Yes, me too.”
“I still think that I’d have been a total sports nerd. I really like sports.”
Taehyung laughs, “well then, you would have been a sports nerd and I would have been an arts nerd.”
Jungkook chuckles, “that sounds like us.”
“Perhaps one night it would have happened that it would have just been you and I left at school and as we ran into each other, I would have been scared that you would hit me. Because all sports majors would have been straight, homophobic jocks and I would have been scared that you would use this opportunity to beat me up.”
“Tae, what are you doing?”
“Hear me out.”
“Okay?”
“And you would have been cold at first, because you would have caught me staring at you during training once, but then I would have accidentally dropped my books and began picking them up so clumsily that you would have felt pity for me and so you helped me and, and our hands brushed and after we both stood up, you wouldn’t have been able to control yourself anymore and so you would have grabbed me and kissed me and then took me in an empty classroom until I would have been shaped just for you.”
Jungkook shifts, gulping heavily. His heart is racing like crazy. Taehyung’s little fantasy is affecting him.
“It would have felt so forbidden because up until this point, you didn’t want to admit that you were bisexual and so you would have taken out your frustration on me until I clutched your shoulders and wailed into your neck because you would have brought me to my limits and yet my body still would have craved for more of you.”
“Stop talking, oh my god.”
“Why? Do you not like it?”
“I do.  A little too much.”
“Too much?” Taehyung glances at Jungkook’s crotch.
The latter notices, covering himself.
“Tae please, I don’t wanna take advantage of you, don’t make it so hard to resist.”
“It is not taking advantage when I wish the same thing.”
Jungkook swallows heavily. Taehyung rolls to his side and begins touching his hip. Jungkook chases the touch, breathing speeding up.
“Do you wish to know what would have happened after this night?” Taehyung asks with big puppy eyes.
“Maybe.”
“You would have driven me home and taken care of me and afterwards we would have sat on the sofa and talked with some cheese and wine. I would have realised that you are the sweetest man I had ever met and you would have grown fond for me. So fond in fact that you wouldn’t have been able to keep your hands to yourself from this day forward. But you would have done it secretly because you wouldn’t have been ready to come out yet. So we would have fucked in private, on the backseat of your car, after classes, the empty locker rooms, the abandoned atelier rooms.”
“Holy fuck, Tae. It’s so hot to think that we’d have been a secret.”
“It is. I am very affected by this.”
“Me too.”
“Did you ever fuck a man when you were human?” 
“No, I always wondered what that would feel like.” 
“I never fucked a man as a human either.”
Tension fills the silence. The day they shared was so wonderful and bonding, the night by the fire is warm and so excitingly private. Their hearts couldn’t be more intertwined with each other as they are today, the tension might finally be too much to bear. 
“We’re human right now”, Jungkook whispers. 
“I know”, Taehyung whimpers, grasping his hip.
“Do you…”
Taehyung nods his head vigorously. Jungkook props himself up on his elbows so he could rest himself over Taehyung. Taehyung lies back down as he does it, grasping his buttocks unapologetically. Jungkook lets him, eyes racing between Taehyung’s.
“We could share this first tonight”, he whispers.
“Kook”, Tae moans, chasing his kiss, “are you certain? Do you really want me?”
“I do. So much. Do you want me too?”
“Yes, yes please I do”, Taehyung begs and hooks his arms behind Jungkook’s head to pull him into a kiss.
Jungkook moans shakily, finding it difficult to match Taehyung’s rhythm. Not because the older man is sloppy, no, because Jungkook is so utterly overwhelmed by the feeling of getting to kiss him. 
He wasn’t aware of how deeply affected he already felt, but it is finally getting so clear to him that he finds it difficult to breathe. Not that humans can really breathe when their faces are melted together for a kiss. Both men soon have to find out as their lungs ache for air. They break the kiss at the same time, panting for air while their lips still try to taste the other. They keep their eyes closed. 
Jungkook is the one to go back in first, cupping Taehyung’s cheek while the other runs his fingers over his scalp. The kiss is already more heated than before. The tension is too big for it not to. Taehyung opens his mouth, asking for Jungkook’s tongue. 
The latter breaks the kiss to breathe, speaking against his lips in an affected rasp.
“Did you ever kiss a man as a human before?” 
“Not like this, please kiss me again please”, Taehyung begs, twisting his hair gently.
“I wasn’t kissed either”, Jungkook sighs, giving into the electric pull. Their tongues finally tangle, the kiss becomes even more intense. They taste the wine on each other’s tongue as much as they taste the growing hunger for more. 
Hands soon begin roaming the valleys and hills of the other’s body, breaks for air are short but countless, moans soon begin to fill the silence. Their jackets come off as well, laid abandoned by the fire as they have each other to keep warm now. The touches begin to truly overwhelm them now that such little clothing was between them and their skins. They start panting and mewling into the kiss, matching each other’s neediness as much as they try to out-mewl it. The day has been long already and the two men are finally at their breaking point. All they exist for right now is each other. In both an emotional sense as much as in a sinfully carnal sense.
The next time the kiss breaks, they know that they won’t be able to kiss anymore. At least not before having taken the next step.
“I want more”, Taehyung gets out breathlessly, feeling up Jungkook’s waist.
“Me too”, Jungkook confesses, rubbing Taehyung’s chest.
“We don’t have lube a-and I didn’t warm up or clean out”, Taehyung stutters. 
“I know, me neither”, Jungkook answers him out of breath. 
“We are human. It won’t work how it does in the real world.”
“I know.”
The realisation that they won’t be able to connect as deeply as they could, aches for both of them, but the desire to be with each other is too big to let it soil the mood. 
Jungkook sits up and takes off his shirt, throwing it to the side. Taehyung looks at him with a dizzy head. Even as a human, Jungkook is so perfectly muscular. Jungkook climbs onto Taehyung’s lap. Taehyung sits up to touch his chest. He outlines it with his fingertips, following his touch with his eyes. His skin is golden because he is human, the fire makes it glow amber. 
“Your skin has the colours of sundowns right now”, Taehyung whispers, meeting Jungkook’s mesmerised eyes. 
Taehyung traces his abs and the paths of his pecs, faltering when he reaches his nipples. Jungkook gives him silent consent with an arch of his back. He touches them. Jungkook moans, parting his lips and writhing on his lap. 
“Your torso is a landscape I want to wander in for hours.”
Jungkook smiles softly, sighing in blissful pleasure. Taehyung’s gentle touch and his poetic words truly work on someone as hopelessly romantic as Jungkook. 
Taehyung looks at his lover’s chest again because he felt his nipples harden under his touch. He exhales shakily. They are so dainty and perfect, standing against his amber skin in darker colour. Goosebumps cover the skin of his chest. 
“Are you cold?” 
“It feels so good.”
Taehyung’s heart flutters. Overtaken by adoration, he slides his hands to Jungkook’s side and pulls him closer this way, lowering his lips to his right nipple so he could lick and kiss it. Jungkook gasps for air, squeezing his legs together as best as Taehyung’s lap allows him to. Taehyung’s mouth is so warm around his nipple, in comparison to the chilly night air it truly steals his breath. 
The intensity of the sensation grows when Taehyung releases his right nipple to worship his left instead and his once licked nipple is left in the cold air. Jungkook misses the warmth of his mouth, as much as he enjoys it on his other side. He closes his eyes, shivering immensely. 
Taehyung feels the shivers as well, lifting his head to check up on him. Jungkook opens his eyes slowly. Even with the orange shine of the fire, Taehyung can see the pink flush of his cheeks. 
“It is too rare that we get our nipples worshipped, isn’t it?” he whispers, massaging them with his thumbs slowly, “it is always a woman’s delight, but rarely that of a man.”
Jungkook agrees with a shy sigh. Taehyung’s touch feels so good that he can barely think of what to answer him. 
“I want to pay attention to the parts which get overlooked. I may not have slept with a man as a human, but I had countless male lovers as a vampire. I am a man as well, I know the male body blindly, yet…” he meets Jungkook’s eyes again, “…I didn’t get the honour of learning yours yet.”
“Tae”, Jungkook gets out, having to gasp repeatedly. He was never promised to be treated like this before. So fully freed of gender roles, so entirely like a human. 
“Can I learn you?”
“Yes.”
Taehyung smiles, heart skipping a beat.
“Show me where to touch you. I want to learn each path to take.”
“Oh god, Tae”, Jungkook lets out, feeling really giddy right now. His head is getting foggy. Taehyung managed to switch the roles with just his poetic words. They truly are witchcraft to Jungkook’s romantic heart. 
“I shall listen”, Taehyung promises, lowering his lips to Jungkook’s right collarbone, “mon chèri. Mon beau chèri.” 
Jungkook sighs, touching his arms for support. He can’t tell where he likes it most because his skin is currently so sensitive that every spot feels incredible. Or perhaps it is because no one really adored his collarbones before and Jungkook can’t handle attention to them. 
“You have such beautiful collarbones, mon chèri. So delicate”, Taehyung whispers, tracing them with parted lips. 
“Tae”, Jungkook whines, writhing away. 
Taehyung looks at him, “does this spot not please you?”
“It does, it’s just a lot.”
“In uncomfortable ways?”
Jungkook shakes his head, “good ways. It feels so good. So good.” 
Taehyung smiles softly, lowering himself again, “what about this spot?” 
His lips begin their adoring dance along Jungkook’s shoulders. From his left, along his collarbones and neck, to his right. He falters for a moment, looking at what felt so different against his lips. A scar. 
“Is this where your arm ripped off?” he asks him, tracing it gently.
“Yeah. It’s uhm, it’s silver in the real world. I, I don’t know why”, Jungkook stutters, tingling like crazy from the kisses Taehyung leaves on his scar. 
“It is magical. A reminder what the curse couldn’t repair. Jimin has the same scar on his chest and back from where Namjoon ripped his heart out.”
“That makes….sense…aahm…” Jungkook sighs, falling into warm bliss.
Taehyung is getting lost in kissing him again, taking on his way back and repeating his journey. Over and over until Jungkook is arching his back and sighing Taehyung’s name. 
“Is this good for you?”
“Yes, so good…”
“And this?”
Taehyung guides his kisses down Jungkook’s right arm, showing his lips their way with his fingers. And Jungkook is gasping. He was never kissed along his arm before. He was touched, groped, held but never kissed. Never adored. Never worshipped. His body feels weakened, he can’t stop Taehyung from turning his arm so his inner wrist was bared to him because of how foggy he makes him feel.
Taehyung lingers on it, kissing and licking it slowly. Jungkook squirms, letting out a squeak followed by a nervous laugh. Taehyung slows down, gazing up at him in question.
“Tickles.”
“Mhm, mon chèri”, Taehyung sighs and turns Jungkook’s arm again to kiss each of his fingers and knuckles. 
Jungkook closes his fingers around Taehyung’s hand. Once again, this never happened to him before. He doesn’t know what to do, how to handle all of this. All he knows is that he is starting to feel vulnerable in familiar ways. He only gets like this when someone is helping him fall into subspace. Jungkook isn’t scared of the implications, enjoying the fall with a racing heart.
Taehyung lifts his head only to lower it again to Jungkook’s left arm. No inch should be left unkissed. He is so immensely in love with Jungkook’s body. There aren’t many people who ever made Taehyung say this. He always appreciated a beautiful body, but whenever he did, it was based on desire. Not with Jungkook. There is no desire motivating him, only love. And the hope that Jungkook will feel the appreciation he deserves to feel. 
He lifts his head once each knuckle was kissed. Jungkook is clutching his hand so tightly, breathing heavily with his cheeks flushed.
“Did this feel good?”
“So good”, Jungkook gets out, “Tae I-”
“Yes?”
“I’m sensitive there.” Jungkook guides his fingers to his lower stomach on the part just above his hip bones. “There.”
Taehyung exhales shakily. He is starting to relax and feel comfortable in showing his spots. This is exactly what he wanted to happen. He wanted to allow Jungkook to fall into a comfortable headspace, to let go of societal expectations and simply enjoy being loved. 
“Yes? Do you wish for me to kiss it?” 
“Yes, please.”
“May I fix you?” 
“Yeah.”
Taehyung picks him up to lie him down on his back, sitting down on his lap. Jungkook’s head rests on a pillow, his hair is messy this way. His chest heaves up and down quickly, his eyes are foggy in submission.
“Are you comfortable?” Taehyung makes sure, fluffing up the pillow before combing his fingers through his hair.
“Yeah”, Jungkook whispers, feeling small and vulnerable. 
“That is good to hear. Relax, mon chèri, relax”, Taehyung whispers and lowers his lips to the spot Jungkook showed him before.
Jungkook moans his name loudly, grabbing his hair and arching his back. His legs tremble, his toes curl. He expected anything but for this to feel so good. The intensity is as if Taehyung sunk him deep into his mouth, as if his most pleasurable spots were being stimulated. Jungkook has to gasp just as much, dropping on the blanket only so he could arch his back again. And again. And again. 
Taehyung feels out of breath as well. This is the moan of a man who is finally loved right. This is the moan of a man who is treated as a person. This is the moan of a man who has discovered his favourite spot. Taehyung feels patches of wet excitement soak his briefs. Jungkook turns him on so much. His kisses however are still placed with love not desire.
Jungkook soon pulls him away, writhing on the blanket.
“Stop please. Stop.”
“Are you still comfortable?” Taehyung asks him softly, holding still for now.
“It’s, it’s a lot. I, I was never- this is the first time I’m kissed there.”
“I figured. It can be very overwhelming to be touched on a sensitive spot. You did very well for your first time”, Taehyung praises, “may I reward you with kisses to your stomach?”
“Yes, please oh god”, Jungkook allows him, parting his legs. He wishes for his pants to magically disappear and for Taehyung to take him in whole. 
But Taehyung isn’t ready yet. Well, he is, but he merely doesn’t want to yet. He wants to show Jungkook that it is also possible for men to feel breathless in desperation. That it is also possible to be truly turned on. Getting hard is easy for a man, it doesn’t take much and because it is, his pleasure is so often overlooked. Taehyung wants to show Jungkook how much it is possible to get aroused as a man. That a hardened cock is not the highest form of desperation a man can experience. 
He dances his hands up and down, left and right on Jungkook’s stomach, guiding his fingertips along his paths and following it up with his lips and tongue. Jungkook’s stomach is so perfectly sculpted and such hard work needs to be adored and worshipped.
“You are beautiful. So beautiful.” 
Jungkook has to writhe again. He needs to stop him. It feels too good. 
“Stop, please.”
Taehyung soothes the shivers by kissing a path up to his neck to worship it instead. Jungkook whines, rolling his head to the side as far as possible to make sure that Taehyung gets every inch. 
“I can feel your heart race”, Taehyung whispers to which Jungkook merely keens and writhes. Taehyung kisses up and down along his jugular, taking in the sensation of his pulse. “It is so wonderful to feel how it affects you. You are so beautiful, everything about you.”
“Tae”, Jungkook has to stop him again. Everything is just too much. He pushes at his arms, arching his back.
“Do you still feel comfortable?” Taehyung asks him, soothing him by combing his fingers through his hair.
“Fuck me please. I, I can’t do much more.”
Taehyung smiles, “yes, you can. Relax, mon bel amour. Just relax.”
Jungkook melts into the blanket, fluttering his lashes. His eyes are so hazy, his cheeks so red. He has enough general knowledge about languages to understand Taehyung’s nicknames for him and they are weakening him. He is his beautiful love. 
“That’s it, relax mon amour”, Taehyung whispers and lowers his lips back to Jungkook’s neck. He kisses him with love and gentleness, leaving no inch untouched until he magically happens to be back at the spot above his hip bone. 
Jungkook shakes instantly, moaning so freely that Taehyung has to moan with him. This must feel like heaven to him. Such moans are normally only leaving him when he is pleasured in more obvious spots. Taehyung pays even better attention to it, wanting him to feel heavenly for as long as possible.
It feels like heaven to Jungkook. It does. Perhaps it feels even better than heaven. Taehyung’s big hands are on each side of his waist, warming him and making him feel so utterly cocooned in safety. Taehyung’s body touches the inside of his legs each time Jungkook tries to close them. They remind him how easy it is these days to give in to Taehyung. But what truly ruins him are his lips. He always knew this spot was sensitive, but it is insane how intense it actually is.
“Take them off please”, Jungkook begs with no control over his own words. 
“Your pants?”
“Yes, please”, Jungkook mewls, lifting his hips eagerly.
Taehyung doesn’t waste any time. He takes off his pants and boxers, placing them aside carefully. Jungkook’s length stands throbbing instantly, begging for attention. Taehyung gazes at it. It is smaller than in the real world and Taehyung wants to taste every inch of him. His tip is glistening in the fiery lights, his veins cast shadows. 
“You are beautiful.”
Jungkook rolls his hips up, begging for his touch.
“You are truly so beautiful. Every inch of you.”
“Hyung, please.”
Taehyung glances at him. His cock throbbed in his pants at the sound of this beg. Jungkook knew what he was doing, using their native tongue for it. He is actually desperate enough to forget every language but that of his childhood. 
“You are so beautiful”, Taehyung whispers and lowers his lips to Jungkook’s foot. He already got him to a point of utter desperation, but he doesn’t want to rush it. It would be unfair to his lower body not to be adored. Taehyung loves every inch of him and he needs to show it. He kisses each toe, each instep, each ankle and sole before he finally moves up to his shin and calves.
“Mon bel amour, oh how I cherish you”, he whispers.
Jungkook whimpers, twisting the blanket. He doesn’t know how much more he can handle. He was turned on before, but not like this. He can’t even think straight anymore, nor properly breathe. He wants it to be faster and yet last forever. Jungkook doesn’t know what to do now that he is so properly turned on. 
Taehyung moves on to his thighs, starting on the outside and working his way to the inside. One by one. Jungkook sobs his name with the first kiss upon his inner thigh, ripping his legs open so widely one could worry he might pull a muscle. 
“Is this a wonderful spot for you?” Taehyung asks, tracing it with his tongue and fingers.
“Yes”, Jungkook coughs out, fucking the air, “please.”
“My beautiful chèri, oh mon beau.”
“Please, oh god please. Please”, Jungkook gasps out.
More kisses to his thighs lets him know that he won’t be released. His hand acts against his will. He grasps his own length, jerking it quickly.
The loud whimper he releases because of it, makes Taehyung look up. 
“Hey”, he gasps, stopping him instantly. It is embarrassingly easy to drag his hand away. “What are you doing?”
“I, I need to be touched. I can’t do this anymore.” 
“But, you’re a good boy. You don’t do such things “
Jungkook shudders, “I’m sorry”, he cries, “I’m sorry, Sir.”
Taehyung melts. His heart races. He helped Jungkook into subspace. It was already known to him, but has it finally confirmed. With just his touch and romantic words, he helped him shed any kind of shame. Jungkook is so honestly him right now. 
“Don’t apologise, you are still my good boy. My goodest boy”, Taehyung praises him and sits back, “now make me proud and hold still.”
Jungkook nods his head vigorously, humming an enthusiastic yes. 
Taehyung undresses hastily at first, but falters once it comes to his briefs. He glances at Jungkook. Something in his eyes makes Jungkook want to sit up and hold his waist for support. He does so with a dizzy head.
“You’re beautiful”, he whispers, painting adoration onto Taehyung’s features.
“So you noticed my hesitation.”
“I did. Is everything still okay with you?”
“More than alright. I am simply just silly.”
“Silly? Why?”
“Please don’t laugh at me.”
“Why should I laugh at you?”
“I am not big. I, I am only that big because of the vampirism.”
“That’s okay. I’m only human too.”
“You are beautiful as a human.”
Jungkook smiles, “I’m sure you are really beautiful too.”
Taehyung blushes. He finally feels confident again. He takes off his briefs, looking at his own cock instantly. Jungkook moans, gazing at him. 
“What if I try? Maybe I can do it”, he argues because everything inside him begs to have Taehyung fill him. His cock is just as hard as his own, glistening in the shine of the fire. Its size is so human, so manageable. Jungkook craves the weight of it inside. 
“I don’t want to hurt you. Human bodies are so stiff and fragile”, Taehyung says even if he craves the warmth of Jungkook. 
“I’ll try to relax.”
“And we’ll use what as lube?”
“I don’t know, spit or precum.”
“Don’t be silly. Human bodies aren’t made to function with such weak lubricants.”
“But I want you”, Jungkook gets out shakily.
“I want you too, but I don’t want to take advantage of you.”
“It’s not taking advantage when I want it.”
Their eyes meet. He is repeating Taehyung’s own words back at him. They share laughter. 
“Oh Jungkook-ah, you mean so much to me”, Taehyung lets out, falling around his neck.
“Hyung”, Jungkook whimpers, sinking into his embrace. 
“Lie down with me, please.”
They lie down, heads sinking into the pillows and limps tangling. They are both on their sides, facing each other. Well, they are falling into a kiss. A deep, passionate kiss. Taehyung keeps his arms hooked behind Jungkook’s head, while Jungkook’s right hand grabs Taehyung’s hip to pull him closer. He throws his leg over his waist, grinding his hips into him just to make it feel a little like penetration. At least the movement is the same even if the warm stretch is missing. 
The kiss breaks messily. Jungkook moans heavily, Taehyung answers him with parted lips. He drags his shaky hand out of Jungkook’s thick hair, guiding his fingers to Jungkook’s lips. The latter takes them in without hesitation, sucking and licking them as if they were cock. He doesn’t open his eyes for it. Taehyung doesn’t either. They are completely lost in the moment. 
Soon Taehyung pulls out, sticking his fingers between Jungkook’s buttocks to rub his hole.
“Hyung”, the submissive younger moans, faltering in his grinds as his brain short circuits. Taehyung is massaging him, drawing circles and applying enough pressure to make it tingle.
“Does this feel good?” Taehyung asks breathily.
“Yes”, Jungkook whimpers, nodding his head. He grabs Taehyung’s hair, “please”, he breathes out, “please don’t stop.”
“I won’t”, Taehyung finally opens his eyes to gaze. He meets Jungkook’s hazy, drugged out eyes. “I exist to pleasure you, mon chèri.”
“Hyung”, Jungkook convulses, “it feels so good.” 
“It does. You feel so good. So incredibly good.” 
“Why does it feel so good? Oh god”, Jungkook whimpers, shuddering as another wave of electricity courses through him.
“Enjoy it, mon amour. You deserve it”, Taehyung whispers, feeling drugged out. This is the kind of state he wanted Jungkook to be in. Disbelief over how good the pleasure feels. This is what he should experience. His beautiful darling boy. 
Jungkook, overwhelmed in pleasure and with his heart barely wanting to keep up, slides his hand between their bodies to touch himself. His cock ached so much, he needed relief. 
What he hadn’t calculated in was Taehyung’s length being so close to his’ and so it happens that his trembling fingers wrap around Taehyung’s length as well. 
“Yes”, Taehyung, who believes the frotting to be planned, sighs and rolls his hips into the touch, “yes, oh Jungkook, ah.”
“Hyung”, Jungkook whimpers, picking up a rhythm. It might have been a mistake at first, but he doesn’t want to fix it. Their frenulums are grinding together, their shafts are too and their flushed tips are getting messy in shared slick. This is the best mistake he ever made.
He tightens his grip around them, concentrating his touches on their tips because it feels best there. It brings Jungkook terribly close to his orgasm, but he doesn’t want to stop. Being with Taehyung like this feels too good. He doesn’t want to lessen the pleasure for even one second.
“You are heaven. My darling heaven”, Taehyung sighs and rewards Jungkook with a faster rim massage.
Jungkook falters. The touch burns him too deep. He gasps and gasps, arching his back so their stomachs touch even more. Their cocks grind against each other in his shaking hold, the movement makes Jungkook gasp even more. 
“Fuck, you’re beautiful”, Taehyung presses out.
Jungkook peels his eyes open, meeting Taehyung’s adoring gaze. The older smiles, carrying honest love in his eyes.
“You are so beautiful”, he whispers.
This is it. The moment Jungkook realises that he is also in love with him. 
“Please don’t break my heart again”, he begs in a whimper, spilling tears as his body trembles in ecstasy.
Taehyung pulls him closer and wraps his hand around a bundle Jungkook’s hair, sending shivers down his spine. The pressure around their cocks is increased as well this way, the fingers on his hole are filling him up just a little. So close. They are so close this way. Jungkook curls his toes and twists Taehyung’s hair, having to moan because nothing could have prepared him for this moment.
“Your heart is safe with me”, Taehyung whispers in their native tongue.
“Promise me.” 
“I promise. You are my north star, Jeon Jungkook.” 
“Taehyung”, Jungkook chokes out and sobs, “you’re making me cum.”
“Don’t hold back, my north star. I will follow. I promise.”
“Taehyung. I love you”, Jungkook wails, breaking apart as his heart has finally reached its breaking point.
Taehyung spills tears instantly. Jungkook said it. He loves him too. He loves him.
“I love you too”, Taehyung croaks and follows Jungkook with a sob. Jungkook’s hand stops working around their lengths, but they make up for it with desperate rolls of their hips. Their shared mess smears all over their lengths, spilling on their tummies as well. It is so warm. So magical. So right. In this moment, their spilled pleasure has one single purpose. To show their deep connection. 
They are both immensely out of breath after their shared high, hugging each other for comfort. Both their hands are messy, but Jungkook doesn’t care, pulling him closer as his tears don’t seem to stop. He is in love with a man and it feels so right. He finally understands Taehyung. It feels so good to be queer. It is so right. 
Taehyung’s own tears don’t stop, but their reasons are different. He is in love with a man who loves him back. He is in love with a man who won’t hurt him. He is in love with a good man. And it is in such ways where Taehyung won’t have to hold back on his intensity of love because he likes it when he is romantic. Taehyung feels as if something in his life is finally going right.
They don’t get dressed for a while after they calmed down, cuddling under a second blanket as the fire slowly dies down. And as they cuddle, they exchange kisses and smiles and boyish giggles because the night is just too wonderful not to fill it with happiness.
“I love you, I love you, I love you”, Taehyung keeps repeating the words over and over again. In every language he ever learned and Jungkook answers him in giggles and whispers of adoration.
“How are you?” Taehyung asks him, cradling his cheeks as his sparkling eyes race over his face obsessively, “are you feeling alright? Did you enjoy it? Are you happy?”
“I’m so happy, it was so good”, Jungkook answers him, lulling his words because he is so far gone in a giddy, droopy headspace.
“Oh Jungkook, I love you”, Taehyung croaks and hugs him, “I love you, I love you, I love you.”
It won’t be last time he chants his most favourite words and Jungkook loves every single repetition.
117 notes · View notes
echantedtoon · 2 months
Text
Ocean Deep Ch17 Miscommunications And Escape Plans P2
(Warnings: Mentions of Yn's wounds, Koyuki's condition, and some fighting/blood/scratches from the mers.
The story is almost done! Almost a few chapters left!:))
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@shadyd3ar @amypop122 @azuredragonstrike
@mimisweetz @chaoticoperatorduckhairdo @staarflowerr @aleee-386 @summrwalkr
@nicora04 @miniverse-zen
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You wished you knew what happened to them all after they started sparing. Or in Akaza's and Tengen's case actually fighting after purposely antagonizing him. The two hissing at each other and snarling out. Honestly you couldn't even tell who was winning because most of the fight was UNDER the water with them randomly popping up every few seconds either splashing up huge waves or showing themselves punching, or Akaza having Tengen in a headlock or some other thing 
Actually it was Kanae who once again took action after a particular shark mer shouted out-
"KANAE!! ARE YOU FUCKING WATCHING!?" Somehow he had gotten himself free from the deadpanned Giyuu and now held the bored merman in a choke hold of his own looking hopefully at the pink eyed woman. "I'm dedicating this win to you!"
Her pretty face quickly turned to a frown and she had enough. Reaching out to grab the window and slam it back shut with surprisingly enough strength to shake the glass panes. The loud THUD from the window had everyone aside from Tengen and Akaza still clawing and biting at each other to give pause, looking up just as the curtains were harshly drawn. 
"I am at my limits! This has gone too far! I explained it to him how many times?!," Kanae muttered to herself turning around and beginning to stomp off towards the door. "I'm going to go work off some stress and make everyone lunch! Let them all sort themselves out!"
Everyone flinched as the door was thrown open and Kanae stomped out of sight. The footfalls echoing away heading towards assembly the kitchen area before everyone looked at one another. You exchanged looks with Mitsuri before slowly turning to Shinobu, mouth opening-
"Don't worry about her." Shinobu didn't look the least bit bothered waving a hand. "She needs to blow off the stress anyways. Why don't you just try to relax and get some rest. Today's already been pretty exciting for you wasn't it?"
"I-..Well maybe I should on them first?" You gave a glance at the window. "To make sure they're alright?"
"Don't give them anymore attention." She shook her head no firmly. "You'll just be feeding into Tengen's 'fantastic' ideas and who knows what the gems for brains will do next?"
Actually...After that whole scary chase sequence and sudden kiss attack (which you were NOT blushing remembering!) you think you had better let everyone cool down and maybe take a stand back...Yeah. that's probably the better idea. So you followed Shinobu's advice no matter how difficult it was, and busied yourself with just going back to read the book. Who knows? It might have more helpful information. 
However you had a hard time sleeping that night. There was some kind of..low humming along with the wind. It started out as some kind of low baritone but then pitched up to a few high notes. It almost sounded like a wind chime was ringing alongside the deep humming of a horn. A strange mixture to be sure, but it wasn't unpleasant. It was more annoying than anything since you didn't fall asleep for at least an hour. 
The next day was when you were sure going to be interesting. You really hadn't seen your friends in so long and was wondering if they were ok. You wanted to really go out and see how they were but shortly after you woke up there was another meeting with all of you courtesy of Kanae. The Kocho girl had pushed in the door startling both you and Koyuki as she practically forced her way in and carried a large black slate with white chalk, with more of that fish soup(yuck) and some bread. At least there was something else to wash it down with. Again Kanae was careful in making sure no one else was around before setting down the chalkboard. 
"Alright. I think I have most everything figured out, but because you're new we need to clue you in " she explained already drawing a sixth stick figured next to the five ones already present.
"Where's the others?" The only ones here were you, Kanae, and Koyuki but Koyuki was still fast asleep. 
"Mitsuri is keeping Obanai busy. He's decided to help himself inside again, and my sisters are out gathering more herbs to make it look normal."
"Good idea." You looked back down to the chalkboard between you two trying not to jostle your shoulder which was still extremely more too much. "Clue me in here." You motioned towards the stick figures and the mini drawings around them.
She nodded looking focused. "In about a week the tides rise and the current near here is strongest! Because of the abundance of wildlife during these hours, they usually all go out hunting for most of the night. All we need is a good few hours of a strong current and we can be on land."
"What do we do when we get back to land?"
"We'll figure that out when we get there. Right now the problem is getting onto land." The chalk made a small line as she circled the stick figures and what looked like a crudely drawn window.  "We found enough pillows to stuff under our blankets to make it look like we're just sleeping in." In case of Obanai you supposed. "We'll wait until they're all gone and climb through the back window. It's on the side of the house not facing the beach so they won't see us if we go that way."
"Good idea! But where's the boat exactly?" 
Her voice dropped to almost a whisper as she quickly glanced at the locked door before looking back to you. "It's just up the beach nearly on the far side, but we know a short cut to get there through the woods. We found a few oars in case we need to paddle our way there." She pointed out a crudely drawn boat.
"Sounds good, but what do we do in the meantime?" 
"Act as we always do. If they don't suspect anything, then we can have a better chance of escaping." Her smile came back a little bit looking at the board.. before her hand wiped across the black smearing the white away and erasing any existence of their plan. 
"Oh, wow." 
"I know! I thought about this a lot-"
"No. I can see why Sanemi fell for you." Pink eyes blinked up to kind f/c orbs as you smiled. "You're really pretty when you smile! I can see why he might like you."
She stared at you longer before frowning and looking back down to the slate. "I don't care. I want to go home. N-Not spend the rest of my days being hounded by a shark. I don't care how many times he tries to serenade me."
You paused in the middle of taking a bite of your bread to look at her. "What?"
"Ugh. He does it every other day. You wouldn't know only being here for four days. He just sits on the beach and starts singing, and he always looks like he's after my approval or something! He never goes away unless I say it's nice O-Or I'm too tired!" Her face turned into a pretty pour as she grumpily gestured at nothing. "Who does he think I am? I'm not some girl who he can just woo into his arms and-"
"Oh that's cute." Her face snapped to your smirk so fast that her head might've popped off if it wasn't attached to her neck. "You so like him."
"WHAT?!" Immediately her face lit up a pink and you laughed. 
"Oh come on. I didn't know that I was being flirted with before because I knew absolutely nothing about mermaids." The bread was pointed right at her. "But I'm certainly an expert on detecting human emotions."
"Yes? A-And how w-would you kn-kn-know that?!"
"I'm a florist. Do you know how many people bought flowers from me?" Your deadpanned brows rose higher at her face which mysteriously started to go a pink. "How many couples have come in looking for flowers for their crushes?" A bite was taken out of the breath making your voice slightly muffled. "How many weddings I did arrangements for? I've seen so many people in love, that I know it when I see it."
Her mouth opened up and no noise came out..Her head shook before she frowned harder. "I-I am not!"
"Uh. Stuttering, blushing, hardcore denial.." You swallowed. "Not to mention we all saw the way you watched Sanemi tussle with Giyuu the other day. Can't say I blame you. A nice beefy shark man, all soft for only you."
"S-Stop!"
You laughed as she hid her face in her hands, it went from pink to red. "Come on. Every girl dreams of being serenaded by moonlight. That's like the most romantic thing a guy could do other than coming to you on a pure white stallion." You grinned wider. "He's outside right now you know. I bet he'd be really happy to know that you like him-"
"My god's! If you say anything about this, then I won't treat you anymore!"
"Aha!" You pointed at her frowning face. "You aren't denying it!"
"Let's just get back to what's really important!" She quickly changed the subject grabbing the chalkboard off the floor as you snickered. "S-So you know what this entails?"
You decided to cut her a break and stop teasing her no matter how amusing it was. "Yes. I understand perfectly. But do you have anything else besides fish soup? It tastes bitter."
You were about to answer but a noise from up the hallway caused you both to whip to the door wide eyed. Quickly you snatched the chalkboard on the floor and shoved it under your knees to hide it, shoving Kanae's hand still holding the chalk as she flinched. Hiding it in one of her dress sleeves before the door slid open and you nearly fainted on sight. Right there. Standing in the doorway. Was A GIANT NAGA!! His human half looked about normal height as he stuck his head in. A mess of choppy black hair swaying messily from his head, and a mitch match of green-yellow slitted eyes narrowed on the inside. You couldn't see most of his body thanks to the black cloak hanging from him, the white scarf tied around his neck, and some kind of homemade mask slapped over half his face. 
His eyes narrowed more at the both of you before he pointed. "Why was this the only door closssed in the house?"
Good lord if his voice didn't send a fearful shiver down your back. You could see why Kanae was so careful around him. However she only turned to him with a polite smile. 
"Hello, Obanai. I was just giving Y/n her food." She gestured to the bread you were thankfully still holding. "We want her to feel comfortable with that wound on her shoulder you know."
"That still doesn't tell me why the door'sss closed?"
"What are you? A pervert?!" 
Kanae looked at you wide eyed and the snake snapped an annoyed look at you. "And what is that supposed to mean?!" He demanded.
You did your best to look very annoyed and pointed accusingly to him. "She has to check my bandages which I remind you are on my back! I'm supposed to just leave the door open so you can peek at me?!" His expression went shocked quickly- "WHAT KIND OF PERVERTED SNAKE ARE YOU?!"
"I-I'M NOT!! IT'S JUST-" He sputtered wide eyed but ducked as you harmlessly threw your bread at him. 
"GET OUT OF HERE BEFORE I GET TENGEN ON YOU, YOU SLIMEY SERPENT!!"
THUNK!!
Obanai rammed face first into the doorframe in his way to try to get away. His eyes rolled a bit dizzy before he shook his head-
"GET OUT!!"
"M'sorrymsorry-" 
He jumped, quickly slithering away from the doorway and you both saw a massive black and white stripped tail before the rest disappeared from sight. There was a pause before Kanae sighed again and turned back to you. 
"Nice save."
"I just thought of the quickest excuse I could think of. Seemed like a good enough one."
She smiled wider at you. "Well try to eat  for now. I'll discuss more with you later when I get a chance to chat normally."
You nodded as she stood up to leave and turned back to your bowl of soup still on the floor. And sighed. Too bad you threw your bread, but food was food you guessed. Kanae smiled as she slowly walked out of the room and into the hallway. Obanai was no where to be seen so that means Y/n's scare tactic worked in driving him off at least. She settled on heading towards her room (or temporary room as she wouldn't be staying here for long) and starting on sewing those few extra pillows together for dummies come the night  
"Kanae!," a woman's voice called out followed by a series of rapidly approaching footsteps. She paused in her steps and turned around to the sight of Mitsuri speed walking towards her waving a hand. "Wait up!"
"What is it?"
She skidded to a stop in front of her and looked excited about something. "You're never going to believe this! Obanai gave me something really important!"
Her face dropped. "Mitsuri, you know that we can't accept anything or else-"
"I know, I know. But it's not for me. It's for you! TADA!!" Her hand was thrusted up and held out a familiar shape. "Obanai was gonna give it to you before he left but for some reason he was in a hurry or he asked me to give it to you instead!"
"Obanai got a gift? For me?"
 Why would the serpent do that? Was he trying to court her now because Mitsuri kept saying no? Or was he trying to butter up Mitsuri by getting gifts for her friends? Maybe he was hoping Kanae would help him out with Mitsuri if he flattered her enough?
Her pretty pink braids swayed as she shook her head. "It's not so much a gift as he was just returning something of yours." 
She again nudged what was in her hand at her. A familiar sight of a small clippy was in her hand, in the unmistakable shape of a green and pink butterfly. Pink eyes widened greatly looking between her and the clippy- Mitsuri held it further towards her and she slowly took it, hands shaking. It felt heavy yet light in her hands. The usual shiny outside dirty from sand and other dirt catching onto it, but it looked generally unharmed. 
"My clip." A bright smile broke into her face as she clutched it to her and beamed. "Our father gave us these, but I lost one when they-...H-How did he find this?"
"Oh it wasn't him." Mitsuri corrected not registering for the reaction she would soon receive next from her correction. "Sanemi found it actually!"
Her face. Dropped. And goodness being sapped away like a cloth slowly wiping up water from a spill. "..What?"
She nodded happily. "Yeah! He wanted Obanai to give you it since he can't move on land! Isn't that so sweet!" She gushed in light of the new emotion crawling over Kanae's face. "He went through all the trouble just to give it back to you. Isn't that-"
She blinked as a formed walked past her, slightly bumping into Mitsuri on her way down the hall and towards the still open front door. You had just stood up holding the bowl your soup had been in, and on your way to drop it off in the kitchen. Maybe there was more bread there or some fresh water to wash down the bitter taste of sardines away. Your feet had barely taken two steps-
"Is this some kind of sick joke to you?!"
You paused in your walking. Koyuki startled awake with a soft snort, blinking tired pink eyes and swaying messy black hair as she sat up. 
"No really?! Is this just some kind of sick reverse phycology where you think I'm going to fall for you!? Oh yes! I'm surely going to fall for you after you returned my clippy. Nevermind it's your fault I lost it in the first place!"
That sounded like Kanar. A much more angry version of Kanae.
"What's going on?," Koyuki asked as you passed by her to peer out the window to the beach.
Kanae was there. Her back was towards you so you couldn't see her face, but her hands were clenched and her arms gestured wildly. In the ocean in front of her was a few mermaids which included Kyojuro lounging in a shallow part of the water, and the Sanemi guy. All were looking shocked and wide eyed at the wildly gesturing woman as she continued her tirade.
"When are you going to get it through your head!? I DON'T LOVE YOU!! I don't even like you!!" Her hand pointed directly at the wide eyed shark mer. There was no mistaking who she was talking about. "No matter what you do! No matter what you try! I will NEVER love you! I DONT WANT YOU!! I WANT TO GO HOME!! AND DON'T YOU DARE SAY THIS IS MY HOME!! THIS IS NOT MY HOME!! THIS IS A PRISON EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOU KEEP US TRAPPED BECAUSE  A L L OF YOU ARE TOO STUPID TO UNDERSTAND THAT WE DON'T WANT ANYTHING TO DO WITH YOU ALL!!"
You could only stare wide eyed and speechless at what you silently witnessed. If you had looked behind you, then you would've seen Koyuki sporting a similar reaction to what she was hearing.
"I HATE YOU! I HATE YOU! I HATE YOU ALL! WHY CAN'T YOU ALL JUST LEAVE US ALONE ALREADY!?"
Her form turned and ran back towards the home to which you strained your neck to watch her from the window for as long as you could become you couldn't see her anymore. Koyuki jumped when a loud sound of a door slamming shut signaled her arrival back inside. Without thinking about it your feet jogged up to the door, at the same time rapid footsteps ran up the hall. 
"KANAE?!" 
If she heard your voice then she didn't react to you. Only continuing past you as you leaned out the doorway in time to catch a glimpse of her form disappearing up the stairs at the end of the hall. A loud slamming of a second door echoing  throughout the house. There was a pause as silence resumed..And then the distant soft sounds of loud crying filtered through the air and softly sprinkled down onto everyone's ears. 
Still reeling with shock, Mitsuri approached the stairs gingerly and quietly. Her footfalls barely making a sound as her guilty face stared upwards. "Kanae?" Her voice did not reach her ears making a heavy guilt weigh in her chest. "..Oh me and my big mouth. This is all my fault."
"Don't say that." She jumped turning to monotone f/c eyes as they also stared up in the direction of the loud sobs. "This isn't any of your faults. I know how she feels, and it can't be easy for anyone."
"Oh. What are we going to do?"
"...You go up there and see if you can calm her down." A head turned. F/c eyes narrowing at the door. "I'll just step outside and make sure everything is okay out there."
A gathering of mers outside in distress and argument did not notice the small figure step outside or open the door. Did not see her stomp up towards the shore's edge. Didn't see her scoop up a fist of wet sand in her hand and reel back her good shoulder. Until looked up-
SPLAT!! 
"Now that I got all of your attention- PAY ATTENTION OR ELSE!"
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Note
(The following is some rambling, FEH Spoilers ahead if you care)
I hope at the end of FE:Heroes life, that instead of it just becoming a forgotten mobile game, a fully fledged game is made out of it. Because I really do think having a FE game that have shorter Saga's would be really fun to play through. And just how much Alfonse could be challenged in a full game where he can MASSIVELY develop instead of the time strides he's made in the mobile game.
Of corse of a full game they'll need to change several things such as how much of their army is made up of heroes from other worlds. But having this HUGE skeleton with FEH for a full game could make one of the best, if not the best, Fire Emblem main line game.
Like, we have the set up to have Alfonse really turn into his own. He's gets to talk to past heroes and other world versions of those heroes. There is so much he can learn from them all but more importantly, so many people to compare him to. Just feeling like a failed leader because all these heroes that saved worlds are around him, while he's a prince in a world that's currently in a war with his neighboring country.
He keeps feeling this way until he meets the Summoner (Avatar Character). Someone from another world who isn't a hero. They're just an average somebody in that world. Even though they are able to use a Devine weapon that belongs to his family, he fights with them and grows closer as friends. He learns that it doesn't matter name or status, but what you do with your own strength to help everyone you can. And even when you can't save everyone, you can always work together with others to raise you and everyone to the point where you can save more people than you could alone.
While the first two Books of FEH didn't really do much for Alfonse, I do think in a full game they would be able to have a better foil with Bruno through these early parts. While Veronica is a very tragic character, she is more so Shernna's foil through the first book and then becomes a fascinating character through the rest of the books (so far). If the story would follow Alfonse's point of view, it would do wonders to REALLY push that foil with Bruno more and more until that foil changes into irony and tragedy that was played in the later books.
While Book 3 was one of the biggest breaking points for Alfonse's charcter, I really do belive that if Alfonse were to have a stronger written connection with Bruno early on. The death of Bruno would hit harder. We know Bruno and Alfonse were childhood friends to the point Alfonse's first actions we see is looking for Bruno (Under his fake name, Zacharius). Hell, you can make this hurt even more by adding an underlying feeling Alfonse had for Bruno. But seeing as Bruno meant a LOT to Alfonse at such a young age, where he was still getting compared to his father and other heroes. To just have someone that wouldn't judge you, have fun with you, and make you laugh. Most people would devolve some romantic feelings for that. While this seems more fanficy just because "Lead turned GAY for Enemy?!" It's use in a story here would push character development further.
Some of the best stories ever written i've read are about building up the base of a character. Only to destroy EVERYTHING about them. Leaving only their bare core and true thoughts on display. Only for them to either have the story end with such a melancholy finish that it just feels. Or give that charcter a way to rebuild themselves stronger, more ferm in their ideals then ever to change the odds. Alfonse is someone, if given enough time and attention in a full game, to be this charcter. He already has enough set up within FEH for this to become real. He really is burdened by the form of media he's in.
I don't really have any closing notes after that but yeah. Alfonse is actually one of the best Fire Emblem Lords when you think about it. Put him in the next smash game
.
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maingh0st · 4 months
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thoughts on holly black's tithe
fair warning that this isn't really going to be a book review—I went into this book predisposed to enjoying it, and I generally had a good time. rather than a comprehensive review, I just have some loose silos of thoughts I wanted to share. it's still a long post, but I'm not attempting to cover everything! so without further ado (some spoilers ahead):
let's get this out of the way
Tithe was Holly Black's debut YA novel, and it reads like it. it's a good debut—she's clearly a skillful author even this early in her career—but there are some choices (pacing, phrasing, etc) that read as slightly amateur. one of these choices was, in my opinion, including multiple POVs. maybe this is a controversial take, but I would've enjoyed this book more if Roiben's POV hadn't been included. it would've increased narrative tension, led to more intrigue about his character, and allowed us to get to know him along with Kaye (rather than being privy to his secrets and Deep Inner Turmoil from the jump).
I can't remember where I saw this, but someone said that reading Tithe feels like talking to a teen who's just figured out they can swear & make sex jokes, and yeah, that's accurate—but I also found it strangely endearing. Kaye is a teen, and her ~quirky~ teenager-ish musings on boys, alcohol, fashion, etc feel believable. which leads, unfortunately, to the next thing I've gotta address:
Kaye is 16 years old, and most of the time, she reads like a 16 year old. on the other hand, we're never told Roiben's exact age, but the man has lived a lot of life by the time we meet him. now I'm pretty lenient toward the idea that the Folk age differently than humans, so it's not really an exact number that's the issue, but the sheer chasm in life experience between them. I quite enjoyed both characters on their own, and conceptually, I feel like they work well together on a personality level, but yikes guys. the story even highlights that Kaye hasn't gotten her license yet because of her age; meanwhile, Roiben is waxing melodramatic about how many people he's killed in his years of tortured servitude to his evil queen. this age gap combined with the insta-lovey nature of their relationship* made this book feel... well, about as dated as it is.
*they have great chemistry once they're actually having conversations & getting to know one another! I really enjoyed their banter! but that's well into the book, and well after they've already been acting mutually infatuated
laughs nervously while looking at sjm
okay I'm not going to harp on the above points, I just wanted to get them out of the way. but now let's play a game: let me tell you about a plot from a popular YA novel, and you tell me which book I'm describing.
there is an evil queen with beautiful red hair and pale skin. she holds her court beneath a large hill. the court itself is ghastly—full of bloodshed, debauchery, riddles, and cruel games. unfortunately, an immortal fey man has found himself magically bound to her power, and while he tries to carve out pockets of agency in minor ways, his forced loyalty to his queen requires him to compromise his morals and cultivate a fearsome, bloody reputation.
a young woman who was raised in the human world finds herself swept up in the machinations of this court. the man fears for her, because she is vulnerable, but her presence also makes him feel hope, and her strength and cleverness surprise him. many shenanigans ensue, and they kill the wicked queen.
I mean. there are notable differences, of course, but I just noticed too many acotar parallels. anyways. holly black did it better
reading a faerie's pov
I've already established that I love Kaye, but guys, I really do love Kaye. I love that she takes initiative and moves the plot along (breaking her glamour too early is a great example of this—she could've gone along with the Grand Plan, but her curiosity led her to act faster). I like that Holly allows her to be selfish and think ugly things, but still try to do good and be kind. I know these books have less buzz than tfota, but I find myself fascinated that there's not really Discourse about the Kenny situation (for a tldr: Kenny is Kaye's best friend's boyfriend. Kaye accidentally glamours him to be infatuated with her. when she learns how to remove that glamour, she first takes the time to taunt him publicly and humiliate him with his own desire for her. personally, I like that Holly wrote her doing this and then feeling remorse about it, but it is objectively pretty shitty, both to him and to her best friend).
I also like the way Kaye is believably fey. she's playful and blunt and mostly uncaring about social conventions. repeatedly throughout the book, she'll make a decision without deliberating on it beforehand (which at first, as a reader, feels jarring), but then as she's facing the consequences, she processes her choice and often feels regret or course-corrects in some way. it feels very fae to jump into something because it seems fun, then only once you're in the thick of it realize that Oops, My Actions Have Consequences
threads left undone/questions that weren't answered—or maybe I'm a bad reader
who tried to kill Roiben at the beginning of the book? it's a Seelie arrow, but I thought there would be more plot relevance to this attempt on his life. do Seelie fae often try to murder him? it seemed like a significant one-off event, but as it stands at the end of Tithe, it was just the narrative's way of leading Kaye to find him
Kaye pricked her finger on a thorn in Lloyd's jacket pocket, and I now understand that this was (I guess?) meant to connect Lloyd to Nephamael (the knight with the thorn-lined cloak). but hey, this is a magic book, and I really thought there would be some magical significance to Kaye pricking her finger
is Kaye Fierch her true name? Does she have a true name that she's unaware of? How are true names given / received?
what secrets are guarded by the Court of Termites?? I know this isn't really a plot hole because Kaye is so new to the world of the Folk, but I'm just putting it on the record right here that I really hope we learn some of these Deep and Dark Secrets that were teased
because this post has gotten long, I'm going to create a separate one with bullet points of things we learn about/are reminded of re: how the faerie world works. I kept track of these for the fic I'm currently outlining, but also because it's fun to pay attention to little worldbuilding details :)
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missmielyhoran · 2 years
Text
Tired eyes are the death of me
Little freak part 2
Tumblr media Tumblr media
in which Autumn likes her twin brother's best friend, and maybe he likes her too...
[Warning- Angst (are we even surprised at this point?), Smut🤭, Making out, dry humping, thigh riding, handjob, asshole Harry as always, insecurities, depression]
Masterlist // Series Masterlist
*****
Schools have the most depressing hallways after hospitals. The bright walls and lines and lines of lockers with kids roaming around talking, pretending to be happy but inside everyone was dealing with some shit.
The bright lights and walls did nothing but give you headaches.
You walked down the hallway, your locker being the last one in the corner. At least your locker didn't look depressing. It had a bunch of marvel and Harry Potter stickers, giving you the typical image of "the nerd."
You took out the books for your class when you heard that distinct laugh. His laugh specifically. Peeking from the corner, you saw Harry with his friends except your brother standing in a group talking.
"What about Autumn?" You hear a boy ask. Your ears perk up hearing your name. You saw the boy smirk while Harry's face contorted into something borderline disgust.
"Ohh, she got nice ass." Another boy said who you didn't recognize. Your face mimicked Harry's and contorted into disgust. You wanted to puke your guts out.
"She's Asher's annoying little sister," Harry says before anyone can add anything to it, making your heart sink.
"I heard my name." Your brother sing songs walking towards the group.
"Eric was saying your sister has a nice ass." The first boy spoke, "You wanted to take her to the dance! You brought her up!" The second guy who you know now as Eric said.
Your brother's face changed colors so fast it would put chameleon to shame. He went from shocked to disgust to angry. Looking at his face, you could tell he was about to lurch onto both of them.
"Asher!" You walked towards the group of boys ignoring Harry. Asher's attention was brought to you, and he walked towards you but not without glaring at both boys and giving their shoulders intentional shove.
Asher wrapped his arm around your shoulder and started walking towards your class, "How many times I have told you to just text me, and I will come to you. I don't want you around them, and it's last time I'm telling you this, " Asher said sternly.
"Yeah Yeah, macho man always there to save me. They're not going to eat me alive" You said stopping in front of your class.
Asher turned and looked at you, his eyes hard, "Yes they will. Just do as I say, Autty. I will buy you ice cream on way back home." He sighed.
"I'm not a child." You rolled your eyes at him, "I want chocolate one, though." Asher laughed and walked towards his own class. Harry was behind him, walking towards the same class as yours. He gave Asher a wave and looked at you, and smiled.
You ignored him and walked inside.
*****
Turns out Harry is a very hard person to ignore, especially when you're consciously trying to ignore him.
It also doesn't help that he was sitting in the line of your vision. Every time you looked up towards the teacher, the back of his beautiful curly hair would be in your way.
The whole day went by like this. You never realized how many classes you two had together, mostly cause you were just happy that you got more time to stare at him, but it was torture.
It was English AP class, his seat was right next to you, and you wanted to die. He was far yet so close for you to smell his cologne, the musky earthy smell, like soil after rain.
He was green afterall.
You sat through the whole class like Edward in Twilight movie when he first smelled Bella. But the end was the worst.
"I'm passing out the assignments, and whoever is sitting beside will be your partner," Mrs. Willson said to the whole class. Everyone started mingling reading their respective assignments.
You looked at your other side where some blonde was sitting, but she had already mingled with someone else. Sighing, you turned to Harry on your other side. He was looking at you with monotone expression. You looked him in the eyes, and he sighed and stood up. "We will do this over the weekend," He said.
You thought he would leave after that, but he extended his hand toward you. You went stiff like a statue, looking up at him with wide eyes, then he took out a small piece of paper from your hair and left.
He will be the death of you.
*****
Research says lonely people take hot showers to replicate the warmth of the body they miss, and to some extent, you thought it was true considering the water you just took shower from fogged up the whole bathroom.
You went on with your usual routine, trying not to think about the day at school or that there is a mirror behind. The temptation to look was real, but you were not giving in. Not today.
You put on a tank top and loose shorts forgoing bra cause it was hot as Satan's ass and you just took a hot shower on top of that.
You walked outside calmly, taking your hair out of the towel. Just as you look up after removing the towel from your head, you see a figure sitting near your window and almost scream before they shush you.
They stood up and walked towards you, the moonlight hit his face and you saw Harry smirking cockily.
"What the fuck? What is this some kind of new prank you and Asher are pulling on me now?" You whisper yell at him cause it was late and quiet, and you didn't want to wake up your mum.
"Asher doesn't know I'm here." He shrugs and stands a step away from you. The moonlight was hitting his back, making his face glow in soft light, his hard features looking soft and playful. The green in his eyes was yet so visible in your darkened room that it knocked out all the breath in you.
Asher's annoying little sister
You took a small step back, keeping your guards up. "Then why are you here?" You turned around towards the shelf, holding all your creams and stuff. You took out body moisturizer and started putting it all over your hands, waiting for him to reply.
"We have project together," He said, making you laugh.
"And you think" You looked at the clock, "11 in the night is the right time to do it?" You turned around and raised a questioning eyebrow at him.
"No, I just wanted to remind you," He said, moving closer. You took a step back, looking up at him in the eyes, your heart beating out of your chest, "You ignored me whole day." He spoke again with his eyes flicking between your then staying at your left one.
"Yeah well who cares?" you whispered, annoyed by his hot and cold behavior, "I'm just Asher's annoying little sister." You threw his own words back at him. For a second, he looked taken back, but it was gone in a moment and was replaced with a glint, like he was enjoying all of this.
He took a step towards you again, and you took a step back. Your back met the wal, and you breathed out a shaky breath. He was so close to you, the closest he has ever been. His chest was almost touching yours. You could feel his breath on your face and smell the same cologne that haunts you.
Harry brought his hand up to cup the left side of your face, and you melted in it like an ice. The warmth of his hand and the way it was almost swallowing your whole face made you whimper.
"You're annoying" He whispered, "Very fucking annoying" He dipped his head down so it was same level as you, "So fucking annoying you won't leave my head" He exhaled shakily like you.
You were looking him straight in the eye. The shock was drowned by the look of hunger in his eyes and the way your thighs were sticking together from your arousal.
You dared to remove your eyes from his face and look down on his lips. You looked back up quickly, feeling embarrassed, but you didn't have time to think cause soon his lips were on yours and you were trying to breathe properly.
His lips were soft, what started as a frantic mess of lips turned into soft, slow dance of tongues. His grip tightened on your jaw as the time went by while yours gripped his shoulders in need.
He pulled back, resting his head on your. Both of you were out of breath, panting with eyes closed. Harry opened his eyes first looking at you, and as soon as you opened your eyes too, his was picking you up and walking towards your bed. He sat at the edge of bed, and you, in his lap, you could feel the hardness near your thigh, which made you more needy than before.
You pushed your every thought and insecurities deep in and did what your heart (pussy) said.
His lips met yours again, much needier than before. You didn't even realize you were grinding on him before he let out a groan. You stopped for a second, realizing what you had done, so you did it again. The hard fabric of his jeans felt amazing over your covered clit.
Both of you were sweating and panting but not daring to break the kiss. Your head started feeling dizzy from the lack of oxygen and the shivers running up from the core.
His lips went south to my neck, and I titled it sideways to give him more excess. His hands were now on my hips, guiding me as I rolled them.
He stops abruptly and pulls back, looking at me with swollen parted lips wet with saliva. You could see his pupils blown black even in dark, and it made you shiver in excitement.
You looked down at him with the same expression, your bottom lip caught under your teeth in anticipation. There, he was sitting in your room on your bed with you on his lap, making out. You were making out with your childhood crush! It felt like a fever dream.
"Fuck" He curses, his hand sliding up from your hips to straps of your top. You freezed at that. Although the thought was very arousing, it was scary. You haven't been with anyone ever. Hell, you even had your first kiss with Harry when you kissed him out of nowhere the other day.
Harry caught onto your inner turmoil, and his face softened a bit. You tried to relax your muscles so you won't feel so exposed in front of him but you couldn't do anything.
"Hey, you alright?" He asked, his voice not going anywhere above a soft whisper. You gave him a nod, your fingers playing with his t-shirt's neck.
"Can we leave the top on?" You asked shyly. Here you were sitting in front of the coolest boy in the whole school feeling shy to take off your clothes. Maybe that was why you never told him he was your first everything but somehwere he knew.
He smiled and pulled you closer, "Jesus christ I thought I did something wrong" He shook his head and pecked your dip of throat, "Ofcourse we can" he said and went back to kissing your neck and collarbones. He didn't leave any marks knowing you had school and then your brother, but he couldn't stop himself from sucking particularly hard at the spot on the curve of your neck when you rolled your hips again.
He pulled back his lips after some time and feathered a few in front of your throat while you kept rolling your hips. He was going crazy and the clothing between was driving him mad. He gripped your hips to stop you, which made yoh whine, and he almost came in his pants.
"Get up for a sec, Autty." He panted out, seeming to never be able to catch his breath.
You scarmbled back with confused and scared expression, "Omg, did I do something wrong? Did I hurt you? I'm so sorry, Har I-" He cut you off by pulling you against his lips again.
"You talk a lot" He rolled his eyes with a small smile on his face. Harry, while keeping his eyes on you scooted and pulled down his sweatpants. Your eyes nearly bulged out of your sockets when you saw his toned thighs with a tiger tattooed on it. You knew he had tattoos after seeing him in tanktops and shirtless if you were lucky.
Now he was here on your bed only left in his boxers with a very noticeable buldge. Life is wild.
You licked your lips and looked up at Harry through your lashes. He had a cocky smirk on his face, obviously feeling flattered by your staring.
"C'mere" He motioned with his fingers, you took shy steps forward not really knowing what he had in mind but you couldn't complain about it. When you were close enough he hooked his fingers around the waistband of your shorts.
"Can I?" He asked. You bit down on your lips as your eyes flicked between his thighs and then towards yours. The room was dark, so there was no way he would be able to see you properly unless he fixates on it.
You gave him a nod and a breathy 'yes'. He pulled your shorts down along with your granny panties softly and threw them somewhere in the room. His fingers running up your leg caused goosebumps to arise, and you shuddered.
He pulled you down, so you were straddling him again, but then he shifted, so you were straddling only one of his thighs.
"Go on baby, move those hips, take what you want," he said near your ear. You moaned, hearing his crude words, his teeth biting your ear lope, then small nips down the side of your neck. You started rolling your hips again. The lack of clothing made the sensation ten times better.
"Fuck you're so wet" Harry graoned at the feeling of your slick wet centre against his thigh. His hand went from your arm to your lower back, pulling you more towards him. You kept rolling your hips the pressure against your clit feeling euphoric.
Your head fell on his collarbone, panting against his chest while he kept his lips on your neck or anywhere he could. You opened your eyes and saw the uncomfortable bludge in his pants. The snug boxers did nothing to hide the small wet mark that was growing.
You chewed on your lips, thinking if you should go for it or not. You didn't know what to do and how to do anything, but you had watched porn and read smut. It had to help somehow. How much bad it can be?
You pulled back a bit and looked at Harry. Sitting on his thigh made both of you at the same level. You kept your eyes on his when you slid your right hand from his shoulder downwards. Harry's eyes widened when he realized what you were doing, but he didn't stop you, so you kept going.
You felt unsure, and surely your inexperienced touch was showing that. You felt his abdomen twitch a bit on your touch. You always wanted to feel his abs all the workout and basketball practice he does shows on his body. You cupped your hand against his clothed cock and applied good pressure with heel of your palm.
Harry bit down on his lower lip to mute down the moan, leaving his lips. Your brother was just next door, and neither of you want to take any risk. You kept your hand there applying pressure from time to time.
"Fuck-" He breaths out, his hand holding your wrist and removing it from his crotch. You look at him confused until he picks you up with your thighs a bit and says, "Slide it down a bit, babe."
Your hands are immediately on his waist. You still feeling unsure pulled his pants down. His length bobbed up and slapped on his lower tummy. When the pants were down to his knees, he groaned and put you back down on his thigh harshly, causing you to whimper.
He brings back his lips to yours, and you start rolling your hips again. The warmth in your core increased as the time went by, and so did your breathy moans and whimpers. Harry took this opportunity and slid his tongue inside, tasting every corner of your mouth.
You in the moment of bravery took his cock in your hand and start moving up and down and now it was his turn to moan. You were still very scared of hurting him, so you kept your touch light, but apparently, it wasn't enough.
Harry pulled back and looked down to where you were getting off on his thigh, covering it in your arousal and then to where your hand was moving up and down on his dick. "Stop torturing me, babe," He whines, throwing his head back.
You look at him confused, not knowing what he was talking about. Were you taking too long to get off? were you not doing it properly? Did he not want it now? Before you could question yourself more, he looked back at you and put his hand around yours on his length, applying more pressure.
The moan he let out was the most pornographic one you have heard. Scared someone will hear him your hand flew to his mouth covering it but that only made him moan louder.
"Har, you're going to get us caught," you whisper yelled, your own orgasm was approaching quickly, and the way Harry was twitching in your hand indicated that maybe he was close too.
"Shit- Sorry" He said against your hand. You removed his when he calmed a bit. His eyes were heavy and droopy, and so were yours, you were sure.
"Go on baby, cum for me," Harry said against your ear sensually. He started leaving kisses down your neck again, moaning against them as his own orgasm overcame him. One more roll of your hip and warmth spread all throughout your body. Harry kissed your lips to swallow all your noises.
Your hand went limp on his length, but he didn't care. When he pulled back a bit and saw you still rolling your hips to prolonging your orgasm while your eyes were closed your head tilted all the way back and a warm glow on your face he came all over his tshirt without any assistance.
Harry's release covered your whole hand and ruined his shirt while you covered his thigh with yours. Your head fell on his chest while Harry fell back on your bed. Both of you didn't have the energy to do anything.
After some time, Harry looked down at you, hoping you didn't fall asleep on his chest covered in mess. You looked up with big tired eyes shining in moonlight.
"C'mon, let's get cleaned up," He said. You sat up and he tired on to think too much about how you were almost straddling his cock and how slick your core felt or how your tits were almost slipping out of your thin strapped top but it was too late. You gasped when you felt him harden against your inner thigh.
His face was flushed with embarrassment when you realized yours went too. You carefully got off from above him. Your legs were feeling wobbly, so you held the end of the bed frame to balance.
"God you will be the death of me" He groaned and you looked at him confused until you looked down and saw him half hard again and then you saw yourself and how he could fully see your boobs from the top.
You giggled feeling sudden confidence from having so much power over him by just being there. You always thought of your body negatively and treated it negatively but now seeing him like this gave you sense of confidence and power.
"Want to take a shower?" You suggested, and Harry didn't need to be told twice as he picked you up and led to the bathroom.
*****
Next part is also smut no need to thank me🫣
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swordfright · 2 months
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What do you think is your most controversial dsmp take?
I got this ask a while ago and I've been wracking my brains trying to come up with something, but honestly...I don't think I really have many hot takes? At least, not ones that I'd consider controversial. Most of my controversial takes are about fanon/how the fandom interacts with the source material, which I assume isn't what you're looking for (but BOY DO I HAVE A LOT OF THOSE.) I also have likes and dislikes when it comes to duos and shipping stuff, but that's subjective obviously and more opinion than lore interpretation.
I guess if you put a gun to my head, I might say these are my most controversial Actual Lore Takes, but they're not all that interesting imo:
The experiments in the revival lab happened AFTER c!Dream's incarceration, not before it. My understanding is that most people interpret that sequence as occurring prior to the incarceration because...why would c!Dream let himself be locked up, relying on his knowledge of the book to be his life insurance, if he hadn't tested the damn thing out yet?! This logic tracks, but I think you could also flip it to argue the opposite: that he also could have conceivably waited to fully test the book until after escaping. During the run-up to the Disc Finale, c!Dream was incredibly busy with the fallout from Dethronement + Exile + Manburg related stuff etc, as well as busy preparing for the confrontation with c!Clingys, plus arranging the staged finale with Punz. The guy was busy as hell and he was also like...still kinda in the midst of a manic episode. Also, keep in mind that while the book was his life insurance for the finale and its immediate aftermath, he had no idea that c!Sam was going to betray him. Considering all that, I don't think it's inconceivable that c!Dream may not have had time to thoroughly test the limits of the revive book beforehand, and he likely didn't realize quite how vital his knowledge of revival would become during his incarceration period. So yeah. I'm open to either interpretation, but I am partial to the possibility that the Vikk and Lazar necromancy montage happened after the prison era. And the exact date/location of the lab are never specified either, which makes me even more open to the post-prison necromancy option. Not a hill I'd be willing to die on, but a hill I like to sit on and admire the view from.
End of Las Nevadas is the weakest stream of the Las Nevadas series. I found it narratively unsatisfying, and not in a clever way. I don't hate that stream, I think it had some really interesting moments, but overall I'd say its messaging was convoluted and the tension was pretty poorly mismanaged. I'd be willing to go on about this if you want, but I think a lot of other folks have probably already articulated it better than I can. Oh, I'll add that I also have complicated thoughts about c!Slime as a character. Don't hate him, don't love him...but I am puzzled about the role he was presumably meant to play in the story vs. the role he actually ends up playing. I could go on about this in detail but it's late and I'm sleepy.
c!Quackity has very simple goals and motives, but his pursuit of those goals is oftentimes way more convoluted than necessary, which ends up making him read as a more complex and dynamic character than he really is (I like this btw!) Another way to put it would be that Q is not a terribly complex character in terms of motivations and ambitions (dr3 has rly good meta on this btw), but he does tend to needlessly complicate his own life and the lives of the people around him in pursuit of simple goals. I think one of his big failings is that he sees violence as an easy solution to his problems but in reality it just creates more problems for him. It's like he keeps failing some sort of foresight check, over and over again. Take the formation of Las Nevadas, for instance. Most of the country's members were intimidated/threatened into joining, not because they're people Q particularly wants to hang around with, but because they're people Q sees as either strong (i.e. they are capable of contributing to LN) or directionless (i.e. they're in need of an owner a leader.) Quackity doesn't really forge alliances, he just...buys people, basically? And then he's shocked when this backfires. His relationship with Purpled is the most obvious example of this, but also LN as a whole: in LN5 (?), Quackity's angry and offended and hurt that only a tiny handful of people show up to the opening ceremony, even though by all accounts the reason the turn-out isn't bigger is because the server has by this point become a chaotic and violent place where anything can happen to anyone for any reason and most inhabitants feel safer sticking to their own turf...and that atmosphere of chaos and violence is something Q has ostensibly contributed to, even before Pandora. c!Quackity creates a country that no one is truly loyal to, inhabited by people who are closer to employees than allies...and then his solution, when he realizes nobody really gives a shit, isn't to try recruiting people in a more equitable way, it's to bioengineer a slime army. That is insane. That is an insane way to solve your problems. In no way is bioengineering a slime army a normal or well-adjusted solution to any conceivable problem. This is what I mean when I say he's a relatively uncomplicated character who complicates everything - he's constantly jumping through hoops of fire to avoid changing his behavior and taking any kind of accountability whatsoever.
I have tons more takes but they're mostly about silly subjective stuff and/or fanon, so I'll leave that for another day if anyone's interested.
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spacelazarwolf · 11 months
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I’m an Italian ger who’s being converted in an Ashkenazi community. I want to connect to my culture so badly!!! Is there any books you’d recommend, Italki food you love, or special rituals you do on Shabbat / during the week that are influenced by being Italian? I’d love to introduce more into my own practice!!
yeah! also this ended up being probably more in depth than you were asking for so apologies lmao.
so for some context (in case you or anyone reading this is not already aware), italki jews are a specific group of jews within italy. italki isn't like a nationality, so it's not a synonym for "italian jew", it's more like a regional identity. people from rome, naples, and venice are all italian, but they're also roman, neapolitan, and venetian. even if they move somewhere else, they'll likely still retain that regional identity. italy didn't become a unified republic until 1871, so culture and language and food varied a lot by region (which it still does), and that's true of jewish communities too, especially those that came from other places.
italki jews are jews who were brought to italy by the romans or traveled to rome to be merchants, and have been there since roman times. ashkenazi jews came during the middle ages, primarily settling in the north in places like venice. it's very worth noting that ashkenazim in italy, with the exception of one or two communities, have significantly different musical tradition, pronunciation, language, and food than other ashkenazi communities. sephardi jews came mostly after the expulsion from spain and portugal, though there were some living in sicily and southern italy.
with all that in mind, i'd definitely recommend doing some research into the demographics of the jewish community in the place you or your family is from. if you already live there, it should be much easier!
resources:
the jews in italy- their contribution to the development and diffusion of jewish heritage
cookbooks by edda servi machlin (she has several, but some are hard to find)
cucina ebraica
i highly recommend checking out torah.it. it's a fantastic archive of recordings and pdfs all about italian jewry. you will spend hours there and still have only scratched the surface.
rabbi barbara aiello also has a lot of different resources.
i highly recommend checking out the work of leo levi for research on italian jewish music. he spent years interviewing and recording chazzanut, scholars, and other community leaders and saved so many italian jewish melodies from complete extinction. (i believe all these recordings are uploaded to torah.it as well)
primo levi is another italian jew to research. he wrote many books that are available for purchase, including a memoir about his survival in auschwitz. there is also an institute in his name dedicated to the preservation, study, and celebration of italian judaism.
ensemble bet hagat put out an album of reimagined italian jewish music a few years ago and i believe they are also working on a second one. it is beautiful.
anyway that's probably enough nerding out, i can get to the more personal stuff and answering the actual questions you asked me now lmao.
right now, it's just me in my apartment so there's a lot of traditions i can't do, but if you have family or friends you can invite over, there are a lot of lovely traditions you can incorporate. i use a three branched candelabra for my shabbat candles. the middle candle is lit first and used to light the other two, as you would with hanukkah candles. if you have multiple people at your table, you can give them their own individual candles, in which case you will light the shamash (middle candle), pass it around the table for each person to light their individual candle, then the host will light the two other candles.
for food, i love making riso del sabato. it's a risotto dish with saffron and it is delicious. there's also a pumpkin ravioli in brown butter and sage sauce in cucina ebraica that is to die for.
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