#i just get to sit and learn about her world

[traveler-at-heart]

Doctor's In - Part 9

Wanda Maximoff x Doctor!R

Summary: New Year, new... relationship challenges? Sharing a home isn't all fun and games.

A/N: Everyone, please don’t tell me how much you hate where this story is going just because it seems like R will cheat on Wanda. There’s more to the plot and it’s not something I’m doing just randomly, I’m spending time and effort into creating a fic that is a bit more nuanced or at least I hope it is.

Natasha is not a people person.

Which is funny, considering her profession. She’s created a system that allows her to interact with patients as little as possible, and to focus on what she understands best: the human heart.

Not as a metaphor for sentimental stuff, but as a perfect machine.

She’s out of her element now, and considering the stupid drunk that is shouting in the middle of the ER, Natasha thinks it’s better to check if you’re around later.

“Is anybody going to take a look at this?” the man raises his messed up hand, slurring his words. He approaches Natasha, and she busies herself reading a chart. “Are you going to help or not, hot stuff?”

“I don’t work here” she grumbles, deciding that she’ll have to wait for you somewhere else.

“I was hoping you could take care of me. Where are you going? I'm talking to you” he says when she turns to leave, his good hand flying to grab her by the elbow.

Natasha is ready to throw a punch, but she never feels his touch in any part of her body.

“Lay a hand on her and I will strap you to a hospital bed and give you a colonoscopy without anesthesia” you say, surprising him with your strenght. “Now, sir, sit the fuck down and someone will be with you shortly”

“I’ll handle it” Barnes, the new nurse, approaches with his signature frown. He is equally attractive and terrifying, though most of the nurses ignore the latter.

“Thank you” you smile, watching the man become quiet as Barnes grabs him by the shoulder, knowing he won’t be able to say anything stupid to him. “Hi, Nat”

“Hey, stranger” she smiles at you. “I was hoping I’d run into you here”

“Is that why you were wandering the ER? You could just text me” you smile, walking with her to the cafeteria. “My shift ended an hour ago, which is why I wasn’t the one dealing with that asshole”

“Thank you for that, you are such a gentlewoman. I am dissapointed, though. I was hoping you’d stay for our first lesson today”

“Of course I am. I wouldn’t miss it for the world”

Most of the hospital was buzzing with excitement at learning the new surgical technique that had earned Melina Romanoff a Nobel Prize. The exception was Tony, but that was only because he was convinced the Romanoffs had a secret, evil plot to take over. Even Pepper had told me to chill in front of everyone.

You sit at the front, saving a spot for Darcy and follow every word Natasha says. She’s just going over some of the theory and the process of how the research came to be, which is still very interesting to you. Medical research required patience and focus that you did not have, so you had turned your professional development to trauma, as well as search and rescue training.

“We’ll meet on Wednesday to start the first exercises” she finishes the presentation, and winks at you discreetly.

You smile, leaving the conference room, Darcy right behind you.

“What was that?”

“What? Were you expecting exercises from the get go?”

“I meant the wink. Why was she winking at you?” Darcy insists and you shrug your shoulders.

“I don’t know. Friends wink at each other. I wink at you!”

“If you winked at me, I’d think you’re having a stroke” Darcy insists, and you have to roll your eyes. “It was flirty”

“Natasha knows about my relationship, we are just friends” you say, eager to finish the conversation.

“I just think there’s something fishy about this”

“You too? Stark got to you, Lewis” you mock, nudging her shoulder. “Come on, it’s all fine. I gotta get home, though, I forgot to tell Wanda I was staying longer”

“I hope she kicks your ass for that!” Darcy says as you run out of the hospital.

“Yeah, yeah”

As you drive home, you stop by the shopping street to get Wanda some flowers. You don’t think she’ll be too upset about you being late, but it never hurts to be safe.

Still, as you park in the driveway, you take a couple of minutes inside your car, looking at your old home in the rearview mirror.

Truth be told… you’re stalling. Though you love everyone inside the Maximoff house very much, you’ve had so much work these past two weeks, and it’s always a bit exhausting to get home and find the kids running around or Pietro complaining about something.

As someone who went from living alone to sharing a house with four other people full time, it was definitely overwhelming to say the least.

You take a last, deep breath and step inside the house, Pietro watching a show while the twins play in the backyard.

“You’re late” he comments.

“Work stuff” is all you say, not feeling in the mood to justify your tardiness to someone who isn’t Wanda.

But, as you enter the kitchen and your eyes meet hers, you can tell she’s also a little upset.

“Sorry, work ran long” you apologize, offering the flowers. She tries to smile and you put them down on the counter. “I really am sorry, Wands”

“No, it’s ok. I’m just behind with the book and the kids were a little difficult today… I could have used your help, that’s all”

I could have used some rest, you want to say, but that won’t help. It’s not forever, you keep thinking. Pietro will get better and move out, and things will be less crowded.

“I’ll be here all day tomorrow, I can take care of anything you need” you promise, saying goodbye to the prospect of a good nap. To keep yourself busy, you take out stuff to make a sandwich, sighing when you notice you’re out of cheese. “Like going to the grocery store, I guess”

Pietro keeps eating everything and by the time you’re home, there’s barely any food left.

“And you’re coming to the twins game on Wednesday, right?”

“Oh” you pause, scratching your neck. “I have to go to the hospital”

“Again? It seems like you’re there all week” Wanda protests.

“Well, yeah, we’re understaffed, between people being sick and others taking time off. I have to go and head the department, it’s my job, Wanda” you say, suddenly not hungry.

Nothing’s enough, you’re not good enough.

“I just… miss you. That’s all” Wanda says, and you sigh, feeling like an asshole.

“I know. I’m sorry. It’s always crazy during January, plus we’re doing a new training with a doctor from Boston. Things will settle in a couple of weeks, I promise”

“Ok” she nods, smiling as you approach her, kissing her temple. “But you’ll have to make it up to me”

“I have a few ideas for that, Miss Maximoff” you smile, pulling her against you and kissing her temple. “And none of them include clothes”

“Good” she laughs, standing on her toes to kiss you.

—

You wanted to have a good day, you really did. Wanda needed some work done on her new study so you dropped off the kids and drove to the hardware store, trusting Pietro could be fine on his own for a while.

What really ruined the mood happened on the way back home.

While turning on a busy street, your mother calls and instead of pressing the ignore button, you answer.

“Fuck” you mutter and it’s too late to hang up. “Hey, mom”

Wanda perks up at that, curious about your mother. She has never even heard her voice, let alone watch you have a conversation on the phone with her. She can tell your posture stiffens.

“Hello, Y/N. I missed your call for the holidays”

“Had lots of work” you lie.

“Oh, well. Hope you liked your birthday present” the woman says in a kinder tone and you almost want to laugh.

“Yeah, thanks. Really appreciate it”

“So, I don’t have a lot of time, wanted to let you know we’re flying there next week but we’re just gonna stay for three days. I don’t think we’ll have the time to meet you. Plus, it’s just us family, you know”

“Right” you try to sound disappointed, but are actually tempted to stop the car and dance around the street. “Some other time”

“Just make sure you’re available in case we need anything. It’s the least you can do”

“Of course” you agree, looking out of the corner of your eye at the confused expression on Wanda’s face. “Have fun, say hi to everyone for me”

“Ok, you take care now”

The minute she hangs up, you let out a huge sigh of relief.

“What was that?” Wanda says, frowning.

“Which part, love?”

“Everything! Ok, first of all, the birthday present. What did she get you? I didn’t see anything delivered”

“Wanda, she doesn’t even know where I live. What happened was, someone walked by and she pretended to be nice. She’s always done it” you explain, feeling irritated. All you want is to be happy that you won’t see her, but Wanda is pushing the subject.

“And what about them coming? And not making the time to see you? Just us family? You’re her daughter!”

“Wanda, please, drop it” you plead, parking outside your home and stepping out of the car.

“Why is she like this? Why don’t you call her out on it? And I’m sorry, I just can’t understand someone being so horrible to their own child”

“Wanda!” you snap, slapping the trunk of the car. “I know, she’s horrible. I don’t care if she lies about getting me a birthday present and I don’t care enough about her to call her out for being mommy dearest. I am just so damn happy that I don’t have to be around her anymore, can we please focus on that?”

“I am just trying to understand. You never tell me anything about her” Wanda protests and you can’t believe she’s still talking about this.

“Everything there is to know, you already know, Wanda. What else would you like to learn? That sometimes I went to bed without having dinner because she thought I was getting fat? Or that when I got a summer job and was out too late she only let me sleep on the porch? What other fucking twisted things would you like to learn about that awful woman?”

“I…”

“If I say it’s complicated or I don’t want to talk about it, maybe just listen once. Here” you toss the car keys her way, not caring if she catches them or not. “I’m going for a walk”

You’d do more than walk if you were wearing different shoes and it wasn’t so damn cold. Still, you don’t make it very far, running into a black and white bunny in the middle of the street. None of your neighbors have pet rabbits, not that you can recall.

“Where did you come from?” you say, hugging the little thing and feeling relaxed as it moves its nose and settles in your arms.

“Señor Scratchy!” Agatha yells from her porch, and you turn around.

“I take it he’s yours?”

“Yes, Rio gave him to me. Señor Scratchy, what are you doing outside?” the woman says with a soft voice, taking him back. “I don’t know how he got out”

“Maybe your fence? Let’s take a look” you walk around to her backyard, pointing at an old part of her wooden fence. “Aha!”

“Oh, great. It will take forever to find someone to fix it” she grumbles. “He’ll have to stay inside for the time being”

“I can fix it. It will only take an hour or so” you say, eager to stay out of the house for a bit longer.

“Well, aren’t you a sweetheart?” Agatha squeezes your cheek and then slaps it gently. “Just remember, I’m already taken, hot stuff”

“I’m just fixing your fence, Miss Harkness” you wink. “I’ll be back with the stuff we need”

Wanda seems to be in her study when you go back home. The fact that you feel relieved instead of sad for making her hide does make you a little guilty.

Truth is, you’ve never lived with anyone you had a relationship with, and neither did she. Maybe you’re both expecting things to be perfect, and it’s just not realistic. Disagreements are bound to happen when you share a home.

Right?

As you work on Agatha’s fence, you keep thinking about a way to make things work for everyone, because you’ve had a couple of fights with Wanda in the span of two days and you really don’t want to make it a habit.

“Did that fence do something to you?” Agatha interrupts you, handing over a glass of water.

“Huh?” you look up at her, taking it and nodding your thanks.

“You're nailing that wood a little too hard, hot stuff” she says, dragging a garden chair and sitting next to you. “Spill”

Saying it’s nothing won’t stop her from asking, so you keep working and tell her everything that has been going on. How the house feels too crowded sometimes, and work is kicking your ass. It takes a minute, but you admit that Wanda really upset you, questioning why you didn’t stand up to your mother.

“I don’t know, I guess it’s something I’ve always wondered myself. Why didn’t I say something instead of being weak. It struck a nerve when Wanda said it out loud”

“Did she call you weak?” Agatha says, frowning.

“No, that’s me being dramatic” you chuckle.

“Look, it’s what I told you the other day. Not everyone understands it, because most people have a semi functional relationship with their parents. And from the sound of it, Wanda’s were straight out of a sitcom”

“I guess”

“She doesn’t have to understand it. She just has to respect your boundaries” Agatha says and you nod, still thinking about everything. “Have you ever thought about going no contact with your mother?”

“Is that what you did?”

“Oh, honey, my mother’s dead. So unless I pull out a Ouija board, we’re no contact already” she cackles, which makes you laugh.

“I don’t know. If she needs something, I guess I would try to help her. If she was a bad mother, that’s on her. But I won’t be a bad daughter”

“You’re too good” Agatha pats your back, and you smile at her.

“Alright, well, your fence is fixed. Can we call it even with the therapy session you just gave me?” you stand up, making sure everything’s in its place.

“Nu-uh, you owe me” Agatha jokes, taking the bunny out to the backyard. “You’ll be fine. Tú puedes”

“Duolingo?”

“Rio’s been teaching me Spanish. The other stuff I can’t say it to you because it’s dirty and for her ears only” the brunette winks, which makes you blush. “Bye, Y/N”

“Bye, Agatha” you roll your eyes at her antics, feeling better as you walk back home.

You figure it’s better to start working on what Wanda needs, so you carry the stuff upstairs and knock before entering the guest room turned into a study.

“Hey” you say, as Wanda looks out the window instead of working.

“Hi”

“I’ll fix the lights and then adjust your desk, or do you need to work now?” you ask, unsure if she’s also upset at you.

“No, that’s fine. It’s not even important, you should rest, work has been crazy for you” she finally turns, and you can tell she’s trying hard not to cry.

“Hey… come here” you step closer, pulling her into a hug. “What’s wrong?”

“I’m really sorry for pushing the subject. I can’t imagine someone being so awful to you, and I made you… I should have kept it to myself”

“It’s… yeah. It wasn’t nice and I really don’t like to look back at everything that happened. But I know you didn’t mean any harm, ok? I love you, baby” you kiss her temple, feeling her relax in your arms. “Why don’t you go check on your brother? He’s been too quiet, which can only mean he’s getting into some sort of trouble”

“Or buying more stuff from Amazon. We barely fit here” Wanda grumbles and you laugh, kissing her. “I’m sorry”

“I know. You’ll make it up to me in bed” you joke, which makes her laugh.

“Maybe now that he’s busy…”

In that precise moment, her brother decides to call for Wanda.

“Go” you kiss Wanda again, wishing you had more time just with her.

—

Natasha’s not excited about the day ahead, the only silver lining being that she gets to see you. There’s nothing wrong with that, of course. She’s flirting and constantly eyeing you, but nothing’s gonna happen.

Not on a lack of desire on her part. It’s pretty obvious you’re not the type of person who cheats. Pretty ironic, she finally meets a decent woman and you’re already taken.

What does that girlfriend of yours have that she doesn’t? Aside from two kids that adore you. Is the whole housewife thing really that appealing to someone like you?

As she enters the room for the next lesson, Natasha notices you’re sitting a few rows behind. That’s a little disappointing. Still, your eyes follow her every move and she feels a little surge of pride at that.

If only you were single, Natasha might get you to roleplay that teacher-student fantasy she’s had.

Still, as she finishes her explanation, you walk up to her, smiling.

“That was brilliant, Natasha” a brunette doctor walks behind you, and you reach out to stop her. “Hey, come meet Doctor Romanoff, Darcy”

“Pleased to meet you. We’re loving the lessons” she says, not wanting to make small talk. “Y/N, come on. I’m starving”

“Oh, I was thinking we could go out for a bite if you’d like?” you turn to Natasha, smiling.

“I’ve got surgery in half an hour” Darcy says, glaring at you.

“Nat?” you turn to the woman, smiling. “Bishop can take care of the ER for me”

“Yeah, I’d love to” Natasha says, kicking herself over how fast she agrees to doing anything you ask.

“Awesome, I know this great place” you begin saying, but she gets a phone call. Natasha looks at you apologetically, but you smile, while Darcy is pulling at your sleeve and giving her a strange look.

“I’ll only take a moment” Natasha promises.

“Yeah, that’s fine”

“A word, Y/N?” Darcy finally gets your attention back and you frown.

Natasha doesn’t care much about the new doctor, unless she’s also fighting for your attention. She finds an empty room to take the call, shutting the door behind her.

“What is it, mother?”

“How’s the second lesson?”

“Fine. Do you keep a timer on your desk?”

“I just like to know if the study plan I designed is working, Natalia. That way, when we move to the next one, it can be more efficient until we manage a global, scalable solution”

“We? I’m only doing this here and then I’m going back to my research, you agreed” Natasha reminds her, blood boiling.

“This is your legacy too”

“Then how come I wasn’t up there getting the Nobel with you?”

“Natalia, those are insignificant things compared to what we can acheive” Melina scoffs.

“I’m not going to spend another month in a different hospital just because you’re too paranoid about someone stealing your research”

“Fine, then get me a new Head of Trauma for Boston and we’ll consider it even” Melina says. “You know Yelena wants to focus on that, she needs someone who can teach her”

“There are tons of applicants. Choose one from the pile in your desk, Mother” Natasha sighs, knowing where this is going.

“What about that doctor you told me about? You sounded so enamoured last time”

“She wouldn’t move to another city, her girlfriend’s here” Natasha says.

“Girlfriends aren’t wives. Well, even spouses can get divorced. Maybe she just needs to hear the right offer” Melina insists.

“Mother…”

“You’re not resuming your research until you find a new Head of Trauma. That’s final, Natalia” the woman loses her cool, hanging up on her daughter.

Natasha feels so stupid, of course this would happen. Melina never cared about anything other than herself and her accomplishments.

“Fuck” the woman says, kicking one of the chairs. You walk inside that precise moment, jumping at the outburst.

“You ok?” you say, locking the door.

“Yeah. It’s nothing”

You let out a sigh, sitting next to her in the bed of the on call room.

“We can skip lunch if you’re not hungry”

“It’s not that. I mean, I’m not hungry anymore, my mother just pissed me off” Natasha shakes her head, trying to calm her racing heart.

“You got one of those too, huh?” you chuckle. “I’m sorry, Nat, honestly. It’s the worse feeling in the world. Someone who should support you trying to bring you down, and then no one believing you because there’s this collective denial that mothers can be bad people”

“Yeah, that’s exactly it. To everyone else she’s a genius. To me, she’s the woman who’s always reminding me how ordinary I am compared to her” Natasha fiddles with her hands, not used to being vulnerable. Not with someone who understands her so well.

“You’re not ordinary, Natasha” you say with so much conviction that the redhead looks up, eyes meeting yours. “And if your mother thinks that, I’m sorry to say that she’s not as smart as I thought”

Natasha laughs, blushing a little at the compliment. You nudge her with your elbow, standing up.

“Want some coffee instead? If you’re not hungry anymore” you place your hand in the doorknob, checking if she’s ready to step out.

“Yeah, sure”

As you nod and open the door, Natasha stands up, reaching for your wrist.

“I… thank you. You’re too kind to me” she says in a low voice.

“I guess I know how isolating it can be. If you ever want to talk, I’m here” you squeeze her arm in return, smiling at her.

Natasha is about to say something else, something probably really stupid, when a voice calls behind you.

“Detka, there you are”

“Wanda? Hi, what are you doing here?” you step out of the room now, looking at your girlfriend. Wanda, however, is focused on the very attractive redhead that follows behind you, noticing you were alone seconds ago

“Am I interrupting something?” she says, eyes not leaving Natasha’s figure.

“What? No, this is Nat… eh, doctor Romanoff. She’s the doctor from Boston who is giving us the course” you explain, looking between both women. Natasha is the first one to give up the staring contest, extending her hand to Wanda.

“Nice to meet you. Y/N has told me so much about you and your boys”

“I’m happy to hear that”

Happy that you know she’s taken.

“So, uh… what are you doing here?” you ask, still thrown off by Wanda’s presence. Ever since Pietro was discharged, she has never been back to the hospital. If you recall correctly, she said she had enough of hospitals for a lifetime.

“I need to talk to you for a second. Alone”

“I’ll meet you in a second” you smile as Natasha walks back to the conference room and she nods. When you turn to Wanda she has a strange look in her eyes. “What’s wrong?”

“You never told me she was this pretty”

“Who?”

“Natasha”

“I didn’t notice” you mumble, scratching your neck. “And anyways, that’s not why you’re here, is it?”

“Right. I just… I wanted to apologize again for yesterday. And make sure we’re ok. I know these past few weeks have been hard. But I couldn’t shake the feeling that I had to come over and see you”

“Hey, we’re ok” you promise, pulling her by the waist. “I love you, you love me and we have a pretty nice family, don’t we? Even with stinky Pietro”

“I’m trying to convince him to shower daily” she laughs against your lips. It’s pretty clear that he was clean during his hospital days because he got sponge baths.

“It’s either that or hosing him down in the backyard”

“I’d like to see that” your girlfriend laughs and you take her hand, bringing it to your lips. “I’ll let you get back to work”

“Ok, if I can I’ll leave early” you kiss her cheek, squeezing her waist until you’re hand goes dangerously lower. “And maybe we can have some makeup sex”

“Mmhm you’d like that wouldn’t you” Wanda slaps your shoulder. “Go”

But as you wave goodbye and walk up to meet Natasha, Wanda doesn’t miss the look on the redhead's eyes.

She knows it, because it’s the same way Wanda looks at you. And that’s all it takes for her to decide, she doesn’t like the other woman.

—

It’s not as late as you thought, because when you get home everyone’s finishing dinner.

“She lives” Pietro says when you walk in.

“He bathes” you say, noticing his wet hair. “Did Wanda tell you I was going to hose you down?”

He doesn’t get to reply, because the kids jump in your arms.

“My stinky minions! Did you win the game today?”

“No, you have to come to the next one. You’re our lucky charm” Billy says.

“Pinky promise, I will come to the next one” you nod, moving to kiss Wanda. “Hey, gorgeous”

“Moya lyubov” she says and you smile, always loving that accent. “Come have dinner while the kids shower”

“Can you read us a story when you finish?” Tommy asks.

“Of course. Now go with Mom, I’ll be there as soon as I’m done”

The kids cheer as you get a plate and serve some delicious lasagna. Now you really don’t regret coming home early.

“Alright, I’m calling it a night. I’m exhausted” Pietro says.

“From showering?” you joke, but he fake laughs as he pushes his wheelchair away. “Leave your plate, I’ll clean it up”

“Thanks, sestra”

As you eat, you remember to send a text to Natasha, asking if she wants to have lunch with you tomorrow before she heads back to Boston for the rest of the week.

The kids are ready for bed and you walk upstairs, sitting between their beds and reading Dragon Feathers, which was your father’s favorite bedtime story to tell. Billy and Tommy laugh as you make different voices, the way your dad did when he told you the tale.

As soon as you’re done, they settle in bed, and Wanda’s the one who tucks them in, joining you at the door.

“I missed this” you say against her temple.

“I missed you” she agrees, leaning against your side. “Come to my study, I want to show you the drawings I made for the book”

The new working space was starting to grow on Wanda. Even if it was smaller, she had enough room to fit everything she needed, and her view was much better from the second floor.

You admire the sketches she hands you, looking at every detail and stroke of her pencil.

“Could I see you work one day? I don’t think I’ve ever done that, baby” you say, in awe of her talent.

“I don’t know, I might get too nervous”

“Please?” you pout, hoping that will change her mind. Wanda rolls her eyes and leans forward, standing on the tip of her toes to kiss you. Her movements turn more frantic and she catches you off guard when she pushes you against the small sofa, straddling your lap.

“Tell me more about her”

“About who?” you say, completely lost in the way her shirt strains against her breasts.

“That new doctor”

“Natasha?” you blink, trying to form a coherent thought. “Why?”

“Because. You’re working a lot, and apparently it’s next to a very beautiful woman whose name I hadn’t heard up until I saw you walking out of a room together”

“We were just talking” you mumble, more focused on undoing the buttons on Wanda’s shirt. She takes your wrists and pulls them away, forcing you to look up.

“I hope she knows your girlfriend is incredibly possesive and jealous” she whispers against your lips. “Or I might have to remind you who you belong to”

“I haven’t forgotten” you promise, looking at her lips intently.

“Then show me” Wanda says, her nails digging in your scalp. Whatever you were about to say dies in your lips as she kisses you, biting your lip and making you forget your name. You open your mouth, allowing her to explore it with her tongue and you carry her to the desk, pushing away everything so she can sit on it.

Wasting no time, Wanda holds her hips up so you can pull down her pants and underwear, and you kneel, moaning against her center when you begin to eat her out, desperate for her taste.

It feels like forever since you’ve had the chance to worship her body.

“That’s it” she moans as you bite the inside of her thigh, pleased with the way her legs close around your head. “I’m gonna…”

“Hold it”

“No, please”

“Did I fucking stutter? God, you are so impatient” you say, squeezing her throat as you move up, sliding two fingers inside her wet cunt. “Why can’t you just let me fuck you?”

“Oh, God” she says, getting wetter at your words.

“I think you’re the one who’s forgetting her place, baby” you say, hitting her G spot over and over until she can’t speak.

“Fuck” Wanda sighs, biting your neck as she finally gets her release. You kiss her, muffling her moans until her breathing evens out. “I missed that”

“Mhm” you smile, letting Wanda taste herself in your lips. “Come on. Let’s go to bed”

As you get changed and clean up, your phone pings several times.

“Work?” Wanda asks, but you’re smiling as you type.

“Huh? No, not work” is all you say, getting in bed and kissing Wanda. “Night, baby”

“Goodnight” she says, watching the screen of your phone light up again. You don’t notice because you’re already asleep, exhausted.

Wanda has to resist the urge to look at the text you just got.

You’ve never given her a reason to doubt you.

And yet, as she goes to bed, looking at your sleeping shape, Wanda can’t help but feel, there’s a part of you that’s not being honest.

[stxrslutrestored]

GOSSIP GIRL 𝜗𝜚 ࣪˖ ִ𐙚

new to the upper east side? not sure how it works round here? don’t you worry, I have you covered. sit back and put on your reading glasses while you become introduced to some of our very own gossip girl regulars 𐙚 enjoy!

gossip sweetheart, at first glance, and second, she’s the nicest girl on the upper east side, kind and well mannered, well educated and seemingly well seasoned (within her world at least). she’s the perfect amount of sheltered and innocent, but don’t let that fool you, she can get what she wants when she wants it. 

to be on her bad side is what some might consider social suicide. because to have sweetheart mad at you, you have to have done something. 

those who know her personally will get to know a much sillier girl, one who jumps easily and then plays it off like nothing. who makes stupid pop culture jokes and gets herself in shenanigans to no end.  

sarah cameron fits into her lifestyle perfectly. much like sweetheart, she’s the perfect girl for the upper east side, making the second half of the it girl duo that we love so much. sarah is classy when she needs to be, yet on the more informal side, we at gossip girl know that she has some other, less precious tendencies. 

sarah cameron is a party girl, known to be in the clubs with a new man every night. for a girl with such a good reputation, sarah cameron certainly has a dark side outside the bubble wrap of upper east side life. 

kiara carrera is somewhat of an outlier in the upper east side, instead of embracing her status and her riches, kiara chooses to live a more simple life, avoiding rich events at all costs. she spends her time hanging in brooklyn with those less fortunate than her. her money goes towards what she sees as good causes. 

this modern day rebel does what she wants when she wants. she indulges in her interest and lets be honest, she doesn’t care one bit what anyone has to say about her, or that’s what it seems like at least.

rafe cameron, the most infamous boy in the upper east side. nobody really knows what goes on inside rafe cameron’s mind,but everyone knows that he is really quite crazy. rafe is often caught in quickly covered scandals. drugs, violence, sex, you name it, if there’s something abominable going on in the upper east side, he’s involved. 

despite all his scandals, rafe still seems to make a life for himself. even after dropping out of college he lives comfortably on the upper east side, wielding his charm like a weapon to get whatever he wants. some say he’s set to inherit the cameron business and all its assets, but how well will that work out in the end? 

topper thornton, typical boy of the upper east side, facing no troubles or woes in his life. topper is laid back without a care in the world. some might say that it’s a sad existence to care for nothing but money, but topper disagrees, his life is easy, getting all he wants without lifting a finger, materials, rights, girls even. but will toppers life one day come crashing down when he really grows up and learns the harsh realities of adulthood. 

kelce rylan is yet another typical rich boy. always spotted with topper thornton, he has much of the same attitude towards life. kelce does whatever he wants and then pays as much as he can to cover it. to the naked eye he is just a regular guy, to gossip girl, we know there’s more to him. as one of rafe cameron’s minions, there’s nothing you can put past him.

jj maybank a total mystery, its common knowledge that jj lives in brooklyn with a deadbeat dad, and that he couldn’t care less about anything to do with the upper east side life. so how is this boy at constance? that’s a secret not even I can tell you. 

jj is constance academy’s resident bad boy, hanging on to his place in the school by a thread it seems. with a constantly scuffled uniform and a generally intoxicated demeanor, jj maybank still manages to carry a certain charm, and it does make him somewhat of a ladies man. 

pope heyward the star student. at constance on a scholarship by some sweet miracle, his one priority is to make it to an Ivy league and finish his education with straight A’s.

a sweet boy, a kind boy. pope heyward is the perfect gentleman. he spends his free time helping out at the family cafe, a staple for the brooklyn gang.

whilst pope heywards life seems simple, it will most likely become apparent that one little push will be enough to send everything crashing down

john b routlege, brookyns heartthrob. high status enough for constance, but not for anything else. rumour has it his father found a lost city of gold and became rich, not many believe it. a lottery win seems more likely.

john b is hard working, determined, loving and caring, the perfect boy to many. as he hangs out with the other brooklyn boys and only just scrapes by at constance, he makes the perfect other half to our very own JJ maybank

barry rodriguez, the local dealer in simple terms. nobody really knows who he is or where he comes from, but they do know he gets the good stuff. barry supplies the entire upper east side, he’s particularly well known to be around rafe cameron, whatever kind of deal they have, nobody really knows.

now you know what the upper east side is about, who everyone is and how it works.

and who am I? that’s one secret I’ll never tell. xoxo, gossip girl

[b-skarsgard]

https://parade.com/movies/bill-skarsgard-nosferatu-interview-exclusive

Skarsgård's vampiric transformation does make him virtually unrecognizable. Combining full-body prosthetics and elaborate costumes, the actor built the character with Eggers over a 10-year period, even working with an operatic vocal coach on a completely new voice. If you're able to spot Skarsgård in the film, hats off to you.

Of course crafting a new version of Dracula/Orlok was certainly a momentous task. Skarsgård's been told there were already over "170 different adaptations" of the character prior to his own. He's humbly giving much of the credit for his own transformation to Eggers' screenplay, though.

full article at the link and under the cut

"I read Robert's Nosferatu script almost 10 years ago, and it hasn't changed all that much in those 10 years," he says. "So the version of Dracula was already different on the page."

Step one in the transformation was the voice. "I was really enamored by Orlok's language," Skarsgård says of Eggers' script. "He's technically speaking German in the movie, but it's English. I think he's learned German just from reading all of these texts and old books. It's this awkwardly constructed English that came out of that."

Orlok's voice was especially important in this film as the character spends much of the film hiding in the shadows to keep his true form hidden from Thomas Hutter (Nicholas Hoult). "The movie monster tends to not have much dialogue, but in this case he has a lot," Skarsgård reflects. "So the voice became my way of expressing the character."

The deep gravely voice in the film was the product of acclaimed Icelandic opera singer Ásgerður Júníusdóttir. "We explored the voice together, but also the technicality of using your entire body when you speak and placing the voice as low as you can in your body," Skarsgård says. "It's a new world for me, and I love voice work. I was just absorbing all of these tools that I'm going to use as my career progresses."

Layered on top of the vocal work were Linda Muir's costumes, what Skarsgård describes as "historically accurate costumes that a 16th-century Hungarian nobleman would have worn. They're the clothes he would have worn when he was a man."

While Focus Features is keeping Orlok's appearance under wraps for as long as possible, you can see the massive fur coat Skarsgård donned in the shadowy poster.

"I knew the shadow was going to be an ally for Orlok, especially in the scenes with Thomas, where he's hiding his appearance," he says. "So he lives in the shadow, and he uses his big fur cape and the hat to not give away what he is. The shadow became a friend."

Perhaps the most impressive element of Skarsgård's transformation, however, was David White's prosthetic makeup, which took hours to apply each day, was difficult to act through and painful to wear. When I ask if he was able to cheat on days he was in the shadows, Skarsgård says no with one exception: "Every single shadow in this movie is also me puppeteering behind camera. That was the only time where I didn't need to have the full regalia on.

"The full prosthetics would take six hours to apply. "It's just uncomfortable," Skarsgård says of having to sit in the chair that long. "And any sense of privacy goes out the window. You become very close with the team that's applying this makeup. They're really getting up in there with a brush in your ass crack. They become your little safe space."

And the six-hour application process was just the beginning of what could be long, physical days on set. The film's final moments involve a sex scene between Orlok and Lily-Rose Depp's Ellen Hutter, which Skarsgård performed in head-to-toe prosthetics.

"I don't know her perspective on, 'I'm going to kiss this monster,'" Skarsgård says about his (fully clothed? skinned? suited?) sex scene, "But for me, when we shot, I was Orlok, and I really, really, really wanted to devour her."

If performing a sex scene in a hot latex bodysuit sounds miserable, that's because it was. "The actual final moment of Orlok was incredibly physically exhausting because there was a lot of technical camera work," Skarsgård says. "What's in the movie, I had to do that 30 times." If you've seen the film, you'll know how truly arduous that experience must have been.

The most difficult day on set for Skarsgård, however, involved a sequence filmed on a boat during Orlok's transfer from his castle in Transylvania to the German harbor he plans to terrorize next. In one scene that involved "pretty tricky advanced camera work," a seaman descends into the hull of the ship to "rid the boat of this demon." As the camera follows the sailor, Skarsgård's Orlok is initially seen behind the man in the shadows.

"Then I have to exit frame, run around and enter my position for when the jump scare pans down to the rats and then pans up and I'm standing there," Skarsgård remembers. "So it's very physical, but I was covered head to toe, except for my eyeballs and the soles of my feet. Even my palms and my hands are covered. That was a 12-hour day."

With that many prosthetics on, there's nowhere for all that sweat to go. "It doesn't breathe, and I don't think it's healthy," Skarsgård confides. "Your body's probably absorbing all those f--king toxins and glue and sh--, plastic and latex and whatever."

During the 12 hours running around the hull of a ship, Skarsgård remembers thinking, "I don't know what's happening, but my body is not doing well."

"You know the skin is your biggest organ right," he says. "So it needs to breathe. I got flashbacks from that urban legend about the woman in Goldfinger being covered in gold and actually dying. I'm like, 'Okay, this is how I go.'"

Obviously, Skarsgård did not die of heat exhaustion in a latex Dracula suit like that one cameraman in the 2022 film Babylon.

"At that point I told them—because it was a long day and I was waiting around—'We need to open it up so my body can breathe,' and then they found the pockets where I could open up and my body started to breathe."

Skarsgård compares the agony of the shoot with what he thinks childbirth would feel like. "They're not on the same level, of course. I've seen childbirth, but it's as close as I can get to giving birth as a man, as these f--king monsters I'm portraying," he says.

When I ask him if there were any other iconic monsters on his bucket list, he says he's done for now. "To play Orlok in Robert Eggers' Nosferatu is the holy grail," he says. "It's kind of the peak and, in a way, the nail in the coffin."

[feroluce]

I've been yapping at a new friend a lot lately about Boothill & Rappa; she described them as "sidekicks in chaos" and! Yes! Finally!Someone else gets it! They're SO cute and so sweet, I adore them. They speak so highly about each other and they have a lot of respect between them! I love them being friends!

With the way Rappa calls him Lord (vs Ninja for everyone else) and how much she openly admires and mimics him, I'd like to think Boothill was the one that showed her the ropes when she was first brought into the Galaxy Rangers. Mentor/mentee and teacher/student are too strong of labels for how I see them, though.

Rappa and Boothill are like a college senior taking the new little freshman under their wing. Or the much older and more experienced coworker trying to look out for the fresh-faced little newbie who's just entering the workforce.

As for how they met and became friends in the first place, I like to imagine it was a case of Boothill's soft heart and being unable to turn a blind eye to things. ☆

Like Boothill wasn't on the mission where the Galaxy Rangers found Rappa, he was off on his own Hunt at the time. But given that the Galaxy Rangers have a leader (La Mancha) and they do seem to have some kind of organized efforts, I wonder if there's any kind of secret hq, or at least certain places where they tend to congregate, like how the Masked Fools have their taverns. Anyway.

Boothill maybe sees Rappa for the first time at one of these hqs (he came back when he heard there'd been a major breakthrough with Dr. Primitive). Or he maybe just happens to run into that Galaxy Ranger from 2.6 that initially found her, who then just. Wasn't really sure what to do with her after the raid. Boothill walks in all these Rangers sitting around like "well now what" because none of them actually expected Rappa to survive the memetic virus. Honestly, her brain should have fried.

Either way, Boothill comes across her by total coincidence. But I think he'd have a lot of sympathy for her because like. Aeragan-Epharshel had been an uncontacted planet before the IPC came around. And since they were there to fuck the place up, they definitely didn't expose the natives to the rest of the cosmos. To say that Boothill "left" the planet is a massive underestimation- he didn't just leave, he escaped. And when he got out, he was completely alone, with very little idea how the rest of the world worked or how to get by.

And right now, Rappa is much the same.

She doesn't know anything beyond the lab she was held captive in all her life. There's no way they would have allowed her to learn that kind of stuff, and I'm sure Kucha wouldn't have told her out of kindness. It would be cruel to taunt her with things she couldn't have.

So someone needs to teach her The Ways of the World! It's just a matter of deciding who.

Boothill: ...What're you morons doing.

The Rangers, in the middle of a very intense rock-paper-scissors tournament:

And Boothill likes these people. He really does! ...Ok, except that one guy. He's kind of a prick. But the rest of them are at least mostly decent! But he wouldn't trust them to keep a pool, let alone a whole human being. If he lets this girl go with any of these dumbasses, there's no way she'll make it. So Boothill smacks them around a bit and announces fine, he'll show the new girl how to be a Galaxy Ranger! If any of them have a problem with this, feel free to make complaints to his revolver ☆

Rappa watches all this go down with stars in her eyes, because Boothill is just like the heroes in her manga! Wow! So cool!

(When it came time to actually leave though, Rappa made some sad eyes at the Ranger from 2.6 that actually found her- for better or worse, she got a little attached. The Ranger told her to go on! Go! Just get out of here!

It's very important to imagine this like a movie where the kid frees the wild animal they bonded with skhzksksjk)

Afterwards, Boothill does actually take Rappa aside and ask if she even wants to be a Ranger. If she doesn't, it's fine. The Galaxy Rangers do a lot of charity work, and everyone knows someone who knows someone who knows someone. They'll find somebody that can help her figure things out and get settled. She can have an actual life now.

Rappa gives a passionate speech (that Boothill catches about 50% of sdlkfjasdl) about how she wants nothing more. She'd wanted it before she even knew the name for it. This was what she'd dreamed of, laying across the bed in Kucha's room, reading through his manga collection for the nth time.

Kucha isn't with her anymore. He'd died just to get her out of there. But she can take the opportunity he gave her and make the most of it. She can still keep her dream alive.

So yes, Rappa wants to be a Ninja Hero. Please teach her!

(Boothill: Bein' a Galaxy Ranger ain't easy shirt. Ya gotta be able to hold yer own in a fight. Can ya even do that?

And then Rappa fucking suplexed him and Boothill was like ok so the first parta bein' a Galaxy Ranger is- JSJJSJDKSK)

They're mentioned together so much outside of the main game, too. So I'd like to think even after Boothill passed on to Rappa all the street smarts he could, they still remained pretty friendly, and make the time and effort to meet up whenever they pass nearby. They just ended up getting along so well!

Like no, they don't see each other very often. They're each on their own separate Hunt. Galaxy Rangers still largely work alone. But they're the kind of buddies that can still happily greet each other the same even after months of not speaking. ♡

(Clutching my heart imagining Boothill telling Rappa she is now a full-fledged Ninja Hero, and she is now strong enough to make her solo journey! But he does give her his phone number. And he tells her that if she's in trouble- like real, real bad trouble- call him. Call him and he'll come runnin', to any corner of the galaxy, ok?)

[formosusiniquis]

Steve gets control over the TV three hours a week. Friday night when he commondears the phoneline too so he can talk to his mom about Dallas as it’s happening. Tuesday, when their local network airs the new Star Trek. And Wednesday, when Quantum Leap is on.

He had to fight for Wednesday.

He had to admit that maybe he does have a thing for science fiction but he doesn’t actually think Robin cares that much about China Beach, just giving him a hard time.

It’s October, Robin is on the floor finishing up their costumes for a party she found on Saturday.

“Where’s he leaping to this week?”

“You’d know if you tuned in every week with me.”

“No, I’m with Eddie, it lost me when the leap was about Buddy Holly and not saving that lesbian.”

He ignores her. Because that isn’t what happened, mostly, and the episode is starting and because he doesn’t actually know the answer. Last week’s episode had ended with a leap back to somewhere Sam had already been.

And somewhere along the way Steve isn’t sure he’s even watching anymore. He can’t even hear Al and Sam’s banter over the sounds of his own thoughts.

Why wouldn’t Sam be excited? Who wouldn’t be excited to get to be a girl? It’s just sometimes, has Sam never thought it would be nice to be a girl just for a little while?

Then there’s the dress.

“I wish I could look like that.”

“What?”

Steve’s barely aware he’s spoken until he hears Robin trying to clarify.

This should be a bathroom conversation, but if he looks away he’s worried this will end. He can’t come back and have it be over. He can’t leave the bathroom and learn he imagined the whole thing. 

So he looks a the chest hair poking out of a low cut floral dress and he says what he’s thinking.

“I want that, I think. I want the dress and the shoes. I want to look in the mirror and see a pretty blonde with a strong jaw. I don’t want it all the time, but I want it.”

“Okay.”

“Is it?”

She clambers up on the sofa. Her fingers cold where she grips tight to Steve’s arm. “I don’t think everyone’s going to get it, but I do. I get you, I’m with you. And you would look better in that dress than Scott Bakula.”

“I’ve got better legs than he does.” Steve says, cause that’s what they do. It’s something serious and then they break the tension knowing they’ve got the one person in the world who understands them sitting right beside them.

“And your hair is nicer.”

“I wouldn’t wear that ugly hat.”

“You wouldn’t need to, your hair would look better.”

“Robin, I think I want to be a girl today.”

“Sounds like it's time to leap, Stevie.”

[writing1raflesia]

Gravity falls reacting to you being a trans man

- pt 1

★★★★★★★★★★★★

Pt2

STANFORD

At first he doesn't show much interest, he is too busy with his research and adventures to pay attention to a mere detail of your life, however, over time he begins to see how important it is to you and an essential part of who you are,then decides to sit down with you to talk about it, peppering you with questions about how you found out? What are your expectations from now on? what do you want to be called? Secretly he is grateful that the world is more inclusive than it was back in his time. He probably already had contact with something similar in his interdimensional travels, which makes him more accepting. If you suffer from some kind of prejudice, he will understand you and despite not being so open with his feelings, he cares a lot about you and your safety. He will teach you how to defend yourself if necessary.

STANLEY

At first he ignores it and even teases you a little about it until Mabel get mad with him and makes him rethink his actions. After receiving a lecture on the subject he seems to start respecting you, no longer getting your pronouns wrong or correcting himself when he do such thing. When his mindset changes, get ready, he will show you "how a man should behave", after all, if you want to be... I mean, if you are a man then you need someone to teach you how to conquer the ladies and be strong ;D. He's the typical bad joke uncle so it takes him a while to adapt and learn about you instead of making his confusion with jokes, but deep down he respects and admires your courage to be who you are.

MABEL

She is super happy that you told her, after all, she already suspected and was just waiting for you to take the initiative. From the moment you tell her, she calls you by your name and correct pronouns. She takes you to choose new clothes and choose your style as soon as possible, she wants to welcome your true self and make you feel safe around her, she tries to make you interact with Dipper and her friends so that you aways feel included. She is a sweetheart, always educating those around her about the trans cause and demanding respect, and always available to talk about it. He put together a list of manly compliments to give you every time you meet.

DIPPER

Dipper was also the target of his sister's lecture on the trans cause, despite already knowing a little about the subject. From the beginning he respects you and understands your insecurities, he more than anyone knows what it's like to not feel masculine enough to be respected. He'll give you some tips he uses to feel more masculine and maybe even introduce you to the Manotaurs, but know that nothing and no one can change who you are, he and you know that you are a man and you don't need to prove it to anyone to be respected

★★★★★★★★★★★★

Author: thanks for reading! Please leave a comment if you want a transfem version or a specific character. Any feedbacks are welcome!

[justaragdollysblog]

Sweet Things

a Ragatha x Gummigoo fic!

Hi guys!!!!! i’m trying to get motivated to write more so here we are!! i absolutely adore this ship i think they’re so cute shdhdjdj

———————————————————

Sugary sweet and perfect.

That’s what Ragatha thinks as she sits next to Gummigoo on a bench at the Carnival.

The two are sharing a funnel cake together, and the sun is setting, painting the coded sky oranges and purples.

It had been a few months since Ragatha convinced (read as: begged) Caine to let him stay, and the two were quickly enamored with each other.

Ragatha was just as accommodating as she always was: showing him around, explaining the rules of the world, etc.

But there was something about his charm, and how he seemed to see right past Ragatha’s fake happy act and what she actually was:

A human. A human being in a bleak situation.

Ragatha’s snapped out of her thoughts by the roller coaster passing overhead. “Oh- Sorry, Gummi! I didn’t mean to space out there.”

“You’re alright, sheila. Everything okay?” He asked in a concerned tone. He set aside the plate of sweet food and wrapped his tail around her comfortingly. Ragatha, she found, was a sucker for this.

She leaned her head on his shoulder, the candyesque texture soothing her further. “Yeah, I’m okay. I was just thinking.”

“Penny for your thoughts, darlin.” He wrapped an arm around her. He never thought his limited worldview (widened unintentionally thanks to Pomni) could account for so much love. But it did, and he loved Ragatha more than anything or anyone.

She smiled softly and genuinely. “Just thinking about how we met. When I practically begged Caine to let you stay, and you stayed in my room that night.” She was quickly melting under his touch.

Gummigoo smiled softly at the rag doll in his arms. “What a day that was. I remember when I saw you for the first time, love. I thought I would’ve melted right then and there.”

He leaned down and pressed a kiss to her head, using his alligator-like snout. “And I just fell deeper in love with you. And it’s been a learning curve, even a little difficult at times.”

Ragatha glanced up at him, concern in her eye. “I hope it hasn’t been too rough…”

He simply shook his head. “There’s no other way I’d want to spend my time. I mean that, doll. You’ve done so much for me, and…I love you so, so much.”

Ragatha felt her eye well up with tears of joy. The circus was hardly a place of peace and fulfillment, but as the cool breeze passed through her hair, and the sky was ablaze in a sunset,

it was still nice to have these sweet things.

————————————————————

WOOOOOO FIRST FIC OF 2025

i wanna get more consistent for u guys!!!

reblogs are appreciated!! see you guys next time!!

[zalia]

And this is why I had to delete my Reddit account to stop myself getting into fights about lore because the lack of understanding (and interest in) about how story *works* and about characters etc. was just... infuriating.

In the wider lore community, it does feel like there's a lot of people who see the narrative as a puzzle to be solved which has an objectively correct 'answer'. Or perhaps more, they see the narrative as a set of objective 'facts' that are stated clearly and can be learned so that they can list them off (as well as a perspective that they are the main character, so *obviously* the world must conform to their views and anything else is bad story). I think this is why you also get a lot of people who complain when characters aren't 'logical' or choosing the most objectively correct course of action 100% of the time. To this brand of fan, the story is a puzzle and *they* have solved it (while sitting at home on their computer in relative safety and comfort, with a surplus of time to spend thinking and dissecting every bit of info) and they don't get why the characters haven't (y'know, because of the trauma, living in a high stress situation under threat of apocalypse, where there are actual consequences for their choices - in the case of Eramis specifically... the Vanguard executing Eramis while leaving, say, Saint-14 alive, would really make it clear that the Eliksni in the City are second-class citizens who can expect harsher treatment legally, which doesn't really look great from the standpoint of ending violence). It's really frustrating to deal with, especially when it leads to 'loremasters' putting out information that is wrong or misleading, because they cannot do anything but the most surface level reading of a text - for example, one specific loremaster having a short video about how incredible Lord Shaxx is and how he's the strongest and best because he defeated Felwinter easily so many times! Ignoring that the lore is pretty clear that Felwinter was not trying to win. He was not there with the purpose of winning a fight. He was buying time and working to get Shaxx to trust him enough to side with the Iron Lords (and get access to the Seraph Bunker beneath his fortress). (I love Lord Shaxx, he is great, but we do not know how he would fare in a fair fight against Felwinter). It does feel like anything that isn't spelled out in block caps in a way a 3-year old could easily understand gets ignored or just... not understood. So I am absolutely unsurprised that Eramis and her story is being misunderstood so badly. (apologies for the rant, it is something that has been bugging me basically since I got into Destiny).

Eramis Executors are up in arms that our favorite, bitter, lesbian crab didn’t receive a bullet to her head to no one’s surprise. What happened to the overarching themes involving forgiveness and mending the wounds of the past to build a better future for everyone resonating with people? Does the Traveler and what it has been representing for 10 years mean nothing when it comes to Eramis? Were we supposed to abandon the power of friendship? Is punishment with no consideration the only way of dealing with those who have committed wrong acts that people know of?

[note-a-bear]

We both confessed to having Big Feelings last night. I told her no one's ever been as gentle to me as she is.

Last time we saw each other there was a quiet moment and after a bit I told her that I was thinking that there really is only one way we could have met and a million ways it could have never happened.

It had to be that night, and I had to make the first move. And if I hadn't taken my coat into the event, or if I'd left a couple minutes earlier, or if she had come in any later than she did, we would have just passed by each other.

And then she was with people the next time we were at the same event. And then it went on indefinite hiatus. And in between that coat check line and then we figured out some things.

And we're still figuring it out. And sometimes she takes pictures of me when I'm distracted and I get to see a little bit of how she sees me and it feels like she's got her arms around me.

[loderlied]

mmm essay about sally and kid gort in the tags (cw for child abuse, mentions of suicide, animal cruelty and a murder attempt. i always hope i don’t have to say this but just in case: i don’t excuse or condone any of her or gort’s behaviour at all.) this is literally not even touching upon everything i have to say because i hit the fucking tag limit lmao. NOBODY READ IT’S BAD BRAINSTORMING I JUST NEEDED TO GET IT OUT SOMEHOW

[sammygender]

YALL ARE NOT SERIOUS PEOPLE no way i’m looking at the tumblr tag for spn 7x03 aka the sam centric flashback episode dealing with his childhood trauma and how he feels like he’s a freak and everyone is just posting about DEAN. dean and his stupid fucking pie. dean winchester used to be my guy! genuinely! s2-3 i truly thought i was a deangirl! But you people (plus this show atp lmfao) are making me hate him😭

[obstinaterixatrix]

webtoon-wise:

Her Tale of Shim Chong (~90 chapters), retelling of korean folklore, solid art/pacing/writing from what I remember (though it's been a while), also good for almost-rancid (but not quite) vibes

I Love Amy (~60 chapters), high school setting, artist's goal was to have a yandere character get a happy ending, good reference for high energy/dysfunctional characters and relationship building while a main character is switching targets (as opposed to master of the fox bead which imo spent a little too much time on the red herring love interest guy)

Sherbet Above the Sea of Fog (~60+ chapters), good reference point for fantasy, one-sided relationships, and very gag-oriented super comedic writing that still leaves room for pathos and interesting developments (as opposed to hero and former general, which imo is too gag-oriented for emotional investment)

Partition (~60 chapters), office romance, hits a very BL-type vibe because both characters are high energy and the main character kinda sucks a little as a person (LOL), main story extends beyond establishing relationship

indie project-wise:

After Hours (20 pgs), office/supernatural romance, good reference for short-form genre-juggling and tension building, I LOVE THIS COMIC!!!!

Gimm*r Vol 1 (~100 pgs), anthology, a lot of good examples of short-form comics

Influenca (~80 pgs), supernatural slice of life, good reference point for more experimental/non-linear narrative stuff

Of Thunder and Lightning (~60 pgs), good point of reference for violence and vibes that don't hit explicit romance but are very loaded

Misc:

Fear and Trembling is a 2003 french-japanese film where part of it is the main character having a weird toxic unfulfilled relationship with her supervisor, watch it to get a reference point for weird toxic unfulfilled relationships

yuricon is a site run by erica friedman, who is the writer of 'by your side: the first 100 years of yuri anime and manga'--good english resource for the genre, I've been meaning to actually sit down and read it. the website has essays/podcasts/yuri news (just checked okazu and learned that galette is having a kickstarter...!), so it's a good academic/news reference. There's a lot of narratives/tropes that you kind of pick up when you learn about the genre, like class s narratives, which can contextualize older yuri and what some current yuri might be referencing/subverting.

translation of a jp blog post about yuri taxonomy

yuri made me human interview part 1 & part 2

Where Is My Place in the World?: Early Shojo Manga Portrayals of Lesbianism by Fujimoto Yukari, translated by Lucy Fraser (got the link to the paper from this tumblr post)

The Sexual and Textual Politics of Japanese Lesbian Comics: Reading Romantic and Erotic Yuri Narratives (using the archive.org link because the website is down)

Bit of an odd one here, but do you have any yuri/GL recommendations for people interested in learning how to learn and write the genre well? Stuff that fires on all cylinders and hits every target, even if it doesn't exactly break the mold (tbh I just want to write girls... no, I shan't say. But I want to do it WELL, y'know?)

YES, manga-wise:

Still Sick (3 volumes) is good for grounded but still silly office romance, the main character tables at cons selling yuri doujin and her coworker finds out her secret, the women are just some guys

Ayaka is in Love with Hiroko (3 volumes) is good for high energy high stupidity office romance (that still hits pathos, does explore internalized homophobia), ayaka is down bad for hiroko and hiroko is very ‘WOAH STRAIGHT WOMEN ARE SO SCARY… STAY BACK, TEMPTRESS’, the women are just some guys

5 Seconds Before a Witch Falls In Love (2 chapters + short extra) is good for short-form action-oriented romance with a witch hunter and a witch, the artist mainly writes BL, the women are just some guys

Hana to Hoshi (2 volumes) is good high energy high stupidity high school romance between table tennis ex-rivals, the gals are just some guy

my preferences skew towards romcom rather than drama/slice of life so if you’re looking for that I have some titles but not a lot to say (and I haven’t read all of these in-depth):

Run Away With Me, Girl where a woman reunited with her high school ex who is in a currently abusive relationship and they run away together. Good for distinct art style, heavier storyline that still wraps up in 3 volumes

Even Though We’re Adults, a woman hooks up with someone who turns out to be married; shimura is pretty prolific (I mean she wrote aoi hana), as far as I remember competent character writing and scope; good for long-form reference for heavier storylines (10 volumes)

How Do We Relationship, more coming of age than yuri imo but good for long-form messy college relationships

She Likes to Cook, She Likes to Eat, very slice of life, grounded to realistic emotions and experiences, definitely comes from a place of Wanting To Represent The Queer Experience, can be a reference for low-key romance

The Two of Them are Pretty Much Like This, age gap slice of life established relationship, good for slow atmosphere and conflicts beyond will-they-won’t-they

I have a couple webtoons to add to the list but this is eating up my snow frolicking time so I’ll add that in like 4-5 hours if I remember. also I have an ff recs tag

[hadesknockedupintheunderworld]

The thing that sucks about knowing the context for a popular ship redraw meme or incorrect quote is watching people be so so incorrect about it and just having to sit there, gripping your thigh, reminding yourself of your values

My personal problem is the quote from "Everything Everywhere All At Once": "In another life I would have really liked just doing laundry and taxes with you"

Because every day EVERY DAY even with ships I love, I watch people use it as a "Oh my god isn't it so tragic that these two characters are forced to suffer the horrors or to be ripped apart when in their heart of hearts they want to be living domestically and doing laundry and taxes?"

And I have to sit there and think "No no you don't get it! That line wasn't the tragedy of the characters not having a better life where they can just be together. It's a different kind of tragedy! The main character didn't like her normal Chinese immigrant life of running a laundromat and dealing with taxes and her family in the USA. Once she learned about all of these different worlds, she began to feel even more like her current life was one that she didn't want. In fact, this life where the guy said that popular line was one where she chose not to go to the USA with him to build a life and love together and became a famous actress instead. She has been thinking about how her husband truly held her down and stifled her life. How if she hadn’t chosen him she wouldn't have had to deal with him and her life would be better and more exciting. And so she's talking to this alternate version of her husband who never became her husband, and she starts making a case for why this is the best outcome. After all, who would want to live in a laundromat and do taxes when she can be a movie star and have anyone she wants? And this is when he tells her that that life that she rejects, that she feels is lowly and one that no one would want, is something that he wants. He doesn't care that she's a famous actress now, he would have loved to just live a simple life with her, even if it was hard and taxing. And this moment in the movie is so so many things (things I'm not even doing justice to here), but it is also a major moment that highlights the disparity in these two characters (even if one isn't her og husband) and their desires.

The main character feels trapped in her life and that she never lived up to her potential. Her husband truly would want to be with her simply because of the bits where it isn't exciting. Even if they're poor and suffer hardship and do things considered simple and lowly, he would still like that life with her.

So yes every time I see this meme my brain screams "get out of here with your blorbos in an au who tragically can't live normally and domestically. Bring in your blorbos who love(d) each other and are messy and are on the verge of divorce and want different things in life, who have to make a choice in what to do about it. Give me your "person who feels trapped in this small life and wanted bigger and better things who lowkey resents the other who is just supporting them" x "person who understands this life isn't always easy or glamorous but is glad that they get to do it every day with this person, who would choose a life of love with them no matter what"

[froggomcdoo]

you ever read a work of fiction so good that you immediately need to find more and consume it but it doesn't have any more and there will likely be no more so you just suffer and think what if.

[lisbonsteresa]

[vibrates at a frequency only dogs and dolphins can hear]

[the-stranger-of-the-hidden-world]

"Dragons who eat other dragons. It's not very common, but there are some kinds that do. The lightning breathers are one of them." Stranger elaborated, reaching out to put a hand on Lyra's shoulder. "It scares us, too...but it's just a fact of life. Bigger creatures need more food to survive. And sometimes...that food is smaller and more vulnerable dragons like us. All we need to do is avoid getting eaten and we're okay."

When Lyra sat down on the ground and explained herself, Stranger and Sunchaser both listened intently while Seabreak and Streak continued to wrestle each other. Maybe it was the stress and worry, or maybe they just needed a moment to relax and play, but they didn't seem too concerned, anymore.

The woman watched curiously with rapt attention as the fae woman made a flower bloom before her eyes, trilling excitedly at the sight of it. So, magic was just this...miraculous ability she had. No wonder humans tried to attack her and use her. That kind of power would be terrifying to those who didn't understand it...or alluring to those who wanted to use it for themselves.

It was sad that Lyra was outcasted for not being fullblooded...'dirty blood.' What a horrible concept. "To be fair, if I tried to learn your language, I don't think I'd sound that different than you do right now. Nothing wrong with learning something new." Stranger replied, sitting next to Lyra and admiring the slowly dwindling dusk as the stars began to dot the sky above them, Sunchaser yawning and laying down beside them, letting them lean against him for comfort if they needed to. It was a relief to see that Lyra was healing quickly, thanks to her magic. They were glad to help her...helpless prey was not very sporting and dragons with less regard for that sort of thing wouldn't hesitate to snap up the fae for a meal.

They knew what it was like to feel vulnerable. Their soft scales, smaller bodies, and stark white scales made them easier targets.

Stranger sighed softly through her nose, leaning against her brother as she looked up at the night sky. "Our old alpha - a really cranky dragon named Slate - she...well, she didn't exactly want me when our mother first took me home." She explained, reminiscing on her early days in the Hidden World. Those memories were a bit hazy, but what she did remember was as clear as day to her. "I...I was on a ship. I was little. I couldn't have been more than maybe a few years old. I remember the ship being destroyed...I remember floating away from the wreckage, crying out for my mother. I remember drifting away and ending up on the very edge of the Mothermouth and crying out because I was so scared...and then our mother - Moondance - found me. And...instead of eating me, she scooped me up and took me home and put me in her nest. Our father - Cloud - was a bit worried about raising me, but our mother insisted that I stay. When Slate found out...she was angry. She demanded that mother take me back and leave me to die, but...she refused. She even fought Slate to keep me and...well, I slept next to my brothers that night when they hatched. And we've all been together ever since - even despite all the trouble we've gotten into."

Sunchaser huffed, ear flapping as he listened to his sister tell Lyra how she wound up in their little family. "The stampede with those big shiny armoured dragons was as much Seabreak's fault as it was yours. Mom keeps telling you not to take the fall for him and you still keep doing it."

Stranger huffed, lightly smacking the yellow white dragon with the back of her hand. "I didn't want him to get in trouble with Slate...and it's easier for her to blame me than it is to blame him. Even if I didn't, she would've still blamed me...why bother arguing with her?"

Grumbling, the elder dragon curled around the both of them, resting his tail lightly on Lyra's lap. He wasn't sure how long she had been on that beach, but she must've been rather cold. "At least Mirage isn't as cranky. The most she does is give us the occasional scolding from time to time."

Chuckling, she trilled softly at him. "Hard to think she's so serious, now...I remember when she used to play tricks on us when we were younger just because she liked making us look undignified compared to her." Glancing over at Lyra, Stranger hummed thoughtfully. Lyra was alone, now. She wasn't sure how fae family and social structures functioned, but she couldn't help but empathize with the feeling of not belonging...well, anywhere, really. "I guess you're a stranger among your own, too."

Lyra yelped as Seabreak tumbled into Streak. But once she realized they were playing she giggled. Watching them happily. Though her smile turned worried as she listened to Stranger explain their world.

It sounded like they left of their own will. It also sounded like it was dangerous for them.

“Dragon eaters?!” She looked at Stranger scared. What would eat dragons?! What was dangerous enough to do that?

Lyra found a soft spot on the grass and laid down on her good side. Curling up and watching the brothers play. Lyra knew the questions would come and when her new friend asked the fae gave her a small smile.

“Fae connect to elements. Like fire, water, earth. I am forest fae. I connect to plants.” Lyra reached out and placed her hand on the grass. Slowly lifting her hand to reveal a purple lily flower growing and then blooming before their eyes.

“I help grow. I also help heal. Myself and others.” Lyra pointed to her arm where the gashes were almost completely healed. Laying there felt so nice. Lyra felt her magic returning and the pain of the day was fading away. She closed her eyes as she continued to speak.

“Magic how I speak with you. It give me knowledge to speak dragon. But I still learning. Speak like hatchling.” She giggled.

“But I only half fae. I half human too. Faes don’t like. Call me dirty blood. So forced to leave. I lived alone. Travel a lot to find new home.”