#i just dont want to feel unwanted anymore

[wiltingg4rden]

just not going to bother with it tonight

[malaak]

I know I have episodes every 2 weeks like clockwork but i need to kms actually this time for real

[loyaltyforged]

unmasked. hhhh…

[thebirdandhersong]

But where do I put all this love? It's inside of me, growing and festering and threatening to explode out of me. Who do I give it to now? Where does it go? Where does it go to fade away? Where does it go to die a quiet death? There isn't a pair of familiar hands to receive it anymore, and no longer a welcoming mailbox waiting with its mouth open. Where does it all go and where should I put it? Who do I love now, the way I loved that boy?

[savage-rhi]

I'm very much a, "fuck yeah and fuck you, I don't need validation! I'm me, cunts!" kinda fella, but sometimes I could use support.

[phagodyke]

.

[iamnotlookingidonotseeit]

sometimes the notes app ain't it, u have to do vent posts where no one will see it

[simonsrileyhusband]

requested on dm, nsfw:

you fidget with the case of your phone as you wait for simon to arrive, you politely nod and smile to your coworker who wouldnt leave you alone, his mouth never shutting and his unwanted flirting still going, even when you have told him multiple times that you have a boyfriend. (one that could break every bone of his body if he wanted to)

"so, where is that boyfriend of yours?"

"on his way..."

"maybe he left you sweetheart, i could take you home if you like~"

you take a step to the side, trying to be as far from him as you could. a smile forming into your face when you hear the loud engine of simons bike parking infront of you.

"sorry lovie, traffic got bad."

you dont say anything, just rush into his arms that wrap around you immediately, he is scanning the situation, his eyes landing on that guy you keep bickering about, his blood boils and he sees him stare at you, if he could he would punch him in the face until he can't smile amymore... but he likes visiting you at work, so he has to think of something else.

"lets go home~"

simon helps you put on your helmet and makes sure your arms are wrapped properly around his torso.

the ride home is nice and quiet, and once you arrive he holds your hand all the way to the apartment. once he closes the door he will take off your jacket, put down your backpack, make you lay on the bed, take off your shoes. his body on top of yours, leaving sweet kisses on your face as his hands rub your waist.

"why so lovey-dovey simon?"

"wanna make you feel good... let me, please"

you nod and kiss his cheek, his bulky hands unbuttoning your shirt, taking it off gently.

"you are mine, you know that, right?"

"yes simon, is everything all right?"

he growls into your neck, kissin and bitting on it.

"mine, mine, mine..." he will whisper as he leaves red marks all over your neck and chest, his hands cupping and gripping all over your body.

"ill make sure he doesnt bother my baby anymore" down went your pants and underweare, simon made sure to make you feel good... really good, he didn't stopped until you were a mess under him.

the next day, when he dropped you off at work, he took off his helmet, grabbed you by the waist and kissed you infront of your (shitty) coworker, your pretty cheeks red, and a little hickey picking over your button up, a proud smirk grows on simons face when you wave at him as you enter the building.

his loving stare and smile drop to a killer gaze, staring at that excuse of a man until he runs into the building.

[sick-as-a-dog]

x

[artdcnaldson]

and when we move on (we dont) and get a new boyfriend and get engaged all within the span of six months and suddenly art finds himself at your engagement party and you look happy and he thinks maybe he imagined his importance to you - maybe he had it wrong and he was the fleeting obsession. how else are you able to move on so quickly? he's miserable but he still plucks up the courage to come congratulate you even if he doesn't mean a word of it. says, "you look beautiful - honestly." just because, well you do.

and its then that your mask slips - you look like art punched you - not those slaps you'd both traded in the past - but like he'd genuinely punched you in the gut. wounded ane pained like he'd just said the most awful thing in the world to you. and your hands tremble when you hand him your champagne glass and mumble "im sorry - excuse me -"

you have to be somewhere alone. suddenly constricted and panting and you find and alcove to lean against and you feel tears burn your eyes and even worse still, a presence at your back - "hey, what -" because of course its him, of course it is. "what's wrong - what did i say -"

you could laugh. you could laugh if a sob wasn't cut off in your throat. you hate him. on your engagement day. the nerve to say you were beautiful. with those genuine eyes and soft expression - like he meant it. like he always thought you were.

he breaks your heart and and you try to move on - you let yourself drown in the next man that shows you attention because arts words follow you everywhere - how you're not the marriage type - well, your fiance wanted you. he wanted you and that had to be enough because if you remained alone and unwanted you think you'd die from the pain of it -

so for him to say something like that now - all of the sudden -

"why do you hate me? i left you alone, didn't i? patricks still your friend. you have everything you wanted - I just want to move on, art. I just want to be wanted - why are you here?"

GODDDDD your mind <3

You know it’s sudden— everyone knows it’s sudden. But you’re the only one who knows why you rushed into it so intensely. Why, after six months with someone, you agreed to marry someone who you hardly even knew.

You knew the basics— Charlie wanted to be a college professor. His mother was filthy fucking rich, old money, and she liked that you came from an affluent background. He enjoyed skiing, and watching tennis, and he did rowing in high school. He was allergic to cats. He liked ordering raw oysters and slurping them down embarrassingly loud at restaurants. He never ordered for you, always paid the bill, never pushed you past a heavy makeout session on the couch.

Because you couldn’t go past that anymore. You couldn’t be easy, couldn’t give it up. You had to be the type of girl someone would marry, you had to be girlfriend material, and wife material, and mother material.

Charlie wanted to get married, wanted a big family, and you checked those boxes for him. You’d never have to want for anything, he’d pamper you and keep you spoiled like you were used to. He was strawberry blonde like Art, but his smile was more refined and practiced, and you wish it wasn’t. When he proposed you said yes, and cried tears that were supposed to be happy, but how could you know for sure?

Art shows up to the engagement party as Patrick’s plus one, and you feel dizzy. But you have to be normal— you can’t give anything away. You just… try to avoid him. When he starts gravitating your way, you find an excuse to talk to someone else, or make your way into the kitchen for a fresh drink. Anything to stay away, because you can’t fucking see him. You can’t do that right now, or ever.

But of course he finds a way— he’s too polite or maybe he’s just too cruel to leave the party without offering a congratulations. You’re cornered like prey, grip so tight on the stem of your champagne flute that you’re worried it’ll snap.

And he doesn’t say congratulations. He just looks at you with a genuine, completely earnest smile and says, “You look really beautiful. He’s really lucky.”

You feel your heart seize in your chest, like someone’s grabbed it and squeezed viciously. The corners of your mouth twitch downwards, but you fight it and bring a polite, practiced smile to your lips. “Could you excuse me for a second?”

He looks confused as you put your glass in his hand, as you close his fingers around it so he doesn’t drop the expensive crystalware. As soon as you’re sure he has it, you’re weaving through the many guests to find solitude. Most of them are Charlie’s friends, few are your acquaintances— people that would just as soon pray on your downfall as they would offer a sweet congratulations.

You slip into the hallway feeling suffocated, drawing quick breaths through your nose until you tuck yourself away in a nicely tucked away alcove and take a slow, steadying breath.

But Art lingers at the edge of your vision, and you want to just cry and cry as he gets closer, as he puts a comforting hand on your shoulder.

“Hey, what…” his brow furrows, he searches your face for some sort of clue, something to help him understand. “What’s wrong? What did I say?”

The noise you let out is strangled, almost animal. You look at him and see that he means it, he doesn’t fucking know, he doesn’t understand. Maybe he just can’t.

“I can’t believe you’re—“ your voice cracks and you look away from him. You can’t stand to see that kicked puppy expression, the earnest concern. You can’t fucking look at it. “And after everything?”

Charlie is a good man. Charlie makes you happy, or he can one day, with time and distance. And he sees you as someone he wants to spend his life with. Isn’t that enough? Why is Art trying to spoil it for you when the alternative is proving him right? That would kill you. You’d rather just die.

“I was just…” he trails off, turns your face toward him with two fingers against your chin. The softest he’s ever touched you, and it feels so foreign and wrong that it shatters something inside that you thought you’d fully repaired. “I thought you’d want to know. That I still think about you, that I want you to be happy.”

Tears spill down your cheek, inky and black from your mascara. “You’re so fucking mean, Art.” Your voice is weak as you look at him. He drops his hand back to your side, but stays close, so close you’re reminded of how intoxicating his presence can be. “Why are you doing this to me? Huh? I did what you asked and I left you alone. And I didn’t tell Patrick, because I didn’t want to hurt you. Why isn’t that enough? Why are you trying to spoil this for me?”

Confusion and hurt flashes across his features. Is that what you thought he wanted? For you to really leave him alone? He didn’t want that, it nearly fucking killed him. He spent the end of senior year tanking in tournaments, he hardly slept.

Patrick had told you about Art floundering, and it made you sick. You’d actually laid in bed crying about it, wracked with guilt. You thought it was all because of you, because you’d distracted him and ruined him.

It felt like he was there only to remind you that you were poison. That you would do the same to the sweet boy just through a set of double doors as you had done to him. But you wouldn’t. You’d never do that again.

“Charlie wants me. I’ve been his girlfriend for only a few months and he already wants to marry me,” your wavers pathetically as you think back to what Art had said back home. The prospect that he could be right was fucking terrifying, but you’d left that girl behind. “He could be the only one who wants me like this. So why are you trying to show up to my engagement party and look at me like you— like—“

You can’t say it, but he knows. He looks at you and he knows. You wince as he sinks to his knees in front of you, tears filling your eyes. Because his hands slide up your calves, settle on the back of your thighs.

He kisses your knee, softly, reverently, looks up at you with soft, desperate eyes. You sigh softly as his lips trail up, skimming along your soft thighs. You lean back, pressing against the wall, feeling yourself melt for him.

“Art,” you gasp weakly. “You can’t. We— we can’t.” You know you’re speaking the truth, but your words and your actions aren’t aligned. Your fingers card into his hair, and your entire body lights up when you finally touch him again.

It aches in your chest— longing and hurt and love and hatred. You never felt as much as you do with him. Charlie doesn’t light up that part of you the way Art does. Maybe that’s a good thing. Maybe it needs to be hidden away, cut off like a rotting limb.

His lips press to the spot just beneath your hem, and he peers up at you. “Let me.”

Not a question. A plea. Let him.

Let him what? Love you? Touch you? Let him eat you out in the shadows of a hotel hallway? Let him back in? Let him have you? Let him be yours to worship again?

“Okay,” your voice is barely above a whisper. “Okay.” You repeat, just to make sure you’re certain. Of what, you don’t know.

His head slips beneath the skirt of your dress, and you moan softly at the press of his lips over your panties. Soft, sweet kisses over the fabric that make you open up for him. You feel need dripping from your center, longing.

You haven’t been touched since him— not that he’d ever actually tried. But having him touch you, kiss you… it feels like ice melting.

He tugs your panties to the side, mouths at your cunt like he’s kissing it. Like he’s kissing you. You moan softly, let your head knock against the wall.

“Art—“ you practically sob. His tongue parts you, laps at you from your dripping entrance to your clit. He moans and nuzzles closer, lets his nose rub against your clit as he presses his tongue inside of you. He squeezes at your thighs, dimples the plush flesh there.

You’re so sensitive— it’s a combination of months of barely even touching yourself, of missing him, of craving him. You’re dripping onto his tongue, moaning softly. You can’t manage more than soft gasps of his name, pleas for more— Art Art Art Art Art.

He draws your orgasm out easily, like it belongs to him. Laps at your release, works you through it until your knees are shaking. He pulls back, mouth glistening with your release.

He stays on his knees, presses another soft kiss to your thighs, and another, over and over again. Soft, reverent, tender. He looks up at you so earnestly, so desperately, that you feel a sob stick in your throat.

“I need to get back,” you say suddenly, when the ache in your chest is too much to bear. “Charlie’s probably wondering… you know— I’ve been gone too long.”

“Charlie?” Art asks, his voice weak, pathetic. He’s still looking up at you from his knees, and he has to scramble up when you start walking towards the women’s bathroom to tidy your makeup. “Why are you doing this?“

He could be asking anything. You answer what you think he needs to hear, what h ended a to know. “He’s going to be a good husband, Art. He’s always sweet, and he’s never… he doesn’t just see me like— like what you see.” You take a steadying breath. “What you said to me back home was true, I know that now. But I can’t just be alone. It’ll kill me.”

You pause, let your lip twitch into a sad smile. “Just please leave me alone, Art.”

You slip into the bathroom, he hears you click the door locked so you can’t follow. Not like last time. When he returns to the party, he drinks three more glasses of champagne. He leaves before Charlie gives a toast to you, to your impending marriage. He can’t fucking stomach it.

[bgomtori]

☆ blue orangeade - k.th

synopsis -> two total opposites but still somehow finding a connection with one another

-> sporty! taehyun x school pres! reader

-> opposites attract, mutual pinning, slowburn.

-> note! mostly written only some smau parts, baller tyun.

you were the school's president, he was the basketball team's captain. you liked rnb music, he liked rap and hiphop. you enjoyed peaceful and quiet areas, he enjoyed going out to parties with his friends. you had outstanding grades, and was in the top class, while he had mediocre grades, and was in the bottom class. so when you admitted to your friend, chaewon, that you had a slight infactuation with him, her jaw dropped immediately.

"YOU WHAT????" she shouted, slamming the table while standing up, her jaw dropped. literally. you quickly placed a finger on your lips, shushing her, begging for her to sit down before she draws anymore unwanted attention to you two.

"it's just an admiration chae, i don't like him fully." you lied to her, with a nervous grin on your face. chaewon clicked her tongue, "you've said this before when we were younger! and you ended up liking the guy." you didn't know what to say, it was slightly true, but you didn't want to like him. you two were the total opposites, how would he ever like you. chaewon noticed your silence, deciding to interrupt your train of thought.

"do you even talk to him." chaewon questioned. you nodded your head slowly, you and taehyun have never had an actual conversation before, only some hi's and bye's in the hallway, and discussions about the funds for the basketball team.

"we talk? kind of.. we say hi and bye to each other, and talk about fundings, i dont know. but he's an interesting person." you sheepishly replied, not making any eye contact to chaewon. chaewon sighed loudly, signalling how done she is with you. you chuckled nervously.

"i'll try striking a conversation with him next time. trust me." you reassured her, convincing her that you would do something about it. she eyed you suspiciously, nodding slowly. you shoved your food in your mouth, acknowledging chaewon's intense gaze at you.

"yn!" a voice suddenly called out for you. turning around you see taehyun with his group of friends, they were smirking at him, with a knowing look on their faces. you tilted your head in confusion, your eyes kept glancing back at chaewon, signalling to her that you needed help. you were clueless on what to do.

"talk to him! it's a literal heaven sent chance." she whispered-shouted while leaning her body towards you. you quickly finished your food, still chewing it as you made your way towards taehyun.

"yea?" you asked, slightly muffled by the amount of food in your mouth. taehyun's hands felt clammy, which was slightly unusual, he just wanted to know if the funds for the next basketball competition went through or not.

"so, have the funds for the upcoming competition went through the principal? our coach needs to know by today." taehyun urged, you swallowed your food and nodded your head quickly, "mhm it went through already! good luck for the competition!" you exclaimed with a bright smile on your face, patting his firm shoulder, turning around back to chaewon who was wiggling her eyebrows, wanting to know how it went. you shook your head, taking your seat next to her.

"he makes me so nervous, i can't even hold a proper conversation with him." you sighed, laying your head on the table. chaewon rubbed your shoulder in encouragement, "maybe he's feeling the same, did you see how he was looking at you? man, if only i had someone look at me like that." your head immediately jolt up from the table, you weren't sulking anymore.

"HUH in what way." you shook chaewon, desperate fot an answer, she grabbed onto your arms to prevent you from shaking her any further, "i can tell, i just know." she smirked, her finger poking your cheek teasingly as you pouted in disappointment. suddenly the bell rang, signalling to everyone that break was over and lessons were about to begin. you bidded goodbye to chaewon before scurrying off to your classroom. taehyun watched from afar as you ran into the classroom, his eyes focused purely on you while you apologise to your classmate who you accidentally bumped into. unknowing to him, his lips slowly turned upwards, unconsciously smiling at your every move.

the teacher soon entered the classroom, causing the noise in the class to die down, chairs scraping on the floor as everyone stood up to greet the teacher. the second half of the school day begun, your eyes were already on the verge of closing, geography classes were extremely boring to you, dozing off every now and then before actually falling asleep. geography class passed by almost immediately since you were dead asleep, you woke up to a few pieces of paper on your table, you scanned through them, realising that they were the notes from the class. on the last piece of paper, the initials K.TH were scribbled messily at the bottom, with a small note off at the side, 'can we be friends? :) my number is ##' you turned around to the back of the class, just to find taehyun with his head down on his table, probably taking a short nap before the next teacher arrives. you catch yourself smiling at the paper, quickly slapping yourself to snap out of it. your hand reached from under your desk to get your phone in order to add taehyun's number into your contact list.

ᶻ 𝗓 𐰁

"yn! are you on the way to the meeting? our teacher is looking for you." chaewon shouted into your ear, you pulled your phone away from your eardrum, trying to spare them some mercy.

"yea, i had to talk to my chemistry teacher about something sorry-" you voice was cut off by suddenly bumping into someone. you paused to look up at the person who was infront of you. kang taehyun was standing there, looking down at you with his big, round eyes staring at you. you bowed and apologised, you could hear chaewon's voice shouting for you to answer. you quickened your pace, placing your phone back to your ear to reply to chaewon. taehyun wanted to speak with you, but you left too quickly, he watched as your figure slowly fading smaller and smaller. he bit his innercheek in irritation, grabbing his bag to make his way to the court.

"you finally came, we are 1/4 through the things we have to go through." the teacher explained, you took your seat beside chaewon as you ran through the already explained documents yourself. the entire student council meeting was tiring, and exhausting, especially for you. the teacher made you do most of the work, while rest had basically half of the workload you had. even if everyone was completed with coming up with the plans for the upcoming school festival, you still needed to sort them out and contact vendors, you basically needed to do everything to ensure that the festival would go smoothly. after what seemed like forever, the meeting was over, you looked at the sky, noticing that it was overcast. just your luck, you left your umbrella at home, now your bag was going to get wet under the rain.

"chaewon, you have an umbrella right? can you send me home?" you asked chaewon while you file up the papers into your file.

"ehh, sorry yn, i have dinner with my family after this, my relatives are coming over." chaewon informed you with an apologetic look, you let out an 'oh' sound without realising, but still waved chaewon goodbye. you walked towards the main gate, the heavy rain hitting the road, splashing onto your legs from time to time, the petrichor scent of the rain engulfing your sense of smell. you stood by the sheltered gate, hoping that the heavy shower will soon be lighter.

with your headphones covering your ears, your favourite tunes playing, tuning out the loud sounds of the rain hitting the ground, occassionally you'd look up to see if the rain had subsided. soon you heard loud voices echoing through the school, you turned around to see a group of basketball men coming towards your direction, you literally prayed for your life, hoping that they wouldn't shout directly beside you. as they approached closer, you increased the volume of your headphones, trying to cancel out the loud, obnoxious voices.

"isn't that yn? why's she still here." jay nudged taehyun as he moved his head to take a closer look. he was worried, shouldn't you be home by now?

"i think she doesn't have an umbrella to go home. taehyun, you like her right? use this chance to send her back." jake grinned with a teasing glint in his eyes. taehyun cussed at him while he laughed, asking the rest of the team to walk faster. you scrolled through your messages, replying them at the same time until you heard a quiet voice call out for you. you looked up in confusion, just to see taehyun holding onto his umbrella, his lips mouthing to you something. you paused your music, removing your headphones, letting them hang around your neck.

"it's really late, the rain doesn't seem like it'll stop. i'll send you home." taehyun offered, you were about to reject his kind gesture, but you noticed his desperate eyes, basically telling you to allow him to walk you home.

"alright.." you accepted, taehyun smiled, opening his umbrella. it was awfully silent, you felt super awkward. despite it being chilly, your face was warm, your hands were sweaty, everytime your hands brush against one another from time to time, you feel yourself internally scream. taehyun on the other hand, made sure that you would be completely dry, even if half of his body in soaked, he doesn't care. as long as you are dry and well, that's all that matters.

"thanks for the geography notes, i was really tired today, so the notes really helped." you choked out a sentence, trying to lift up the mood. taehyun smiled to himself, proud that he was able to help you in a small way, "you're welcome, it's nothing much though, so it's ok."

"oh right, the competition you're having, is it before or after the school festival?" you suddenly questioned, taehyun was taken aback, since when were you interested in basketball? "a week after, why'd you ask?" you were silent, you didn't know what to say, because you wanted to go to his game but you didn't want to tell him now. you were now tongue tied, trying to form your words, taehyun chuckled at your attempt to reply him, he could tell that you wanted to watch his games.

"you should come watch it, we're really good. especially me." he giggled, praising himself. you glared at him when he made that horrible compliment about himself.

"wait my house is just there, i'll run there." you suddenly exclaimed, taehyun was about to protest on how you were going to get wet but by the time he could say anything, you were gone, running in the rain towards your house. taehyun sighed, suddenly feeling a vibration in his pocket, realising that it's from an unknown number, he tapped on the contact, his ears immediately warming up

### : hey!! it's yn :)

### : thanks for sending me home, i'll treat you something one day or do anything you want me to do

### : get home safe

tyun ^..^ : hey yn, it's fine. remember to shower quickly, i dont want you sick.

ynn ♡ : aww, i will! i'll text you later.

taehyun's felt his stomach do sommersaults, he was so giddy. you literally said that you were going to text him later, was he crazy? did he read that right? he kept looking at your contact, making him bump into a street lamp on accident.

ᶻ 𝗓 𐰁

after weeks, you and taehyun have been getting closer, he'd always find an opportunity to send you home, even if he needed to rush home immediately after. everyone in school caught on with how close the two of you were, the school's president with the famous captain of the school's basketball team. everyone found it slightly odd how you two would even click, you had a good girl aura around you while taehyun had a slight bad boy vibe, not as bad as the rest of his basketball team, but about there.

"yn, over here." a voice called out for you, you turned around to see taehyun's head peaking out of the classroom, his hands directing you to go to where he was. you spun around, telling your friend group to wait for you in the cafeteria, apologising to them as they proudly pushed you towards taehyun's direction. you brisked up your pace, finally entering the classroom. you saw him sitting at his usual seat, his hands fiddling around with something.

"what is it tae?" you asked, pulling a seat next to taehyun. his hands immediately coming to a halt when you tried to peak over his shoulder to see whay he was doing.

"since, the festival is tomorrow, i want to have matching bracelets with you.. if it's ok with you." taehyun locked eyes with you, and felt his brain malfunction due to how close you two were, he was completely smitten to you. when you nodded your head, in agreement to his request. taehyun beamed brightly, pulling out the bracelets he was hiding under his table. you stared at it in awe, it was a matching gwen stacy and miles morales bracelet with a heart pendent attached to one side of the bracelet. the heart pendent was magnetic and could attach itself onto taehyun's matching heart pendent to create a full heart. the colours of the bracelet complimented your personalities as well, which was really cute. you could tell that taehyun put a lot of thought into it.

"it's really cute, i love it." you thanked, still admiring the bracelet. taehyun smiled softly at your actions, he found you adorable, no wonder he was so attracted to you.

"can you stay here with me till break is over, i'm too tired to ball in the court right now." taehyun pleaded, his head rested on your shoulder, taking in your scent while your hands lingered around his muscular arms, humming in response. soon enough, taehyun lifted his head up, looking into your eyes before turning to the side to grab something from his bag.

"wear this for the competition next week, you can keep it afterwards." staring at you with slight puppy eyes, wanting you to accept his jersey. that was his dream, his girl wearing his jersey to his competition or just in general. you took his jersey in hesitation, glancing at him, trying to make sure that he wasn't lying to you.

"i'll wear it for you." you grinned at him, taehyun felt his heart melt at your pretty smile, lord he was so drawn to you, he'd actually worship the ground you walk on. you're literally his ideal girl, smart, kind to everyone despite the circumstances, paitient, bubbly, just the perfect girl for him in conclusion.

"oh, the bell, i'll go back to my seat. i'll text you later." you patted taehyun's shoulder, placing the seat you took back to its original position before returning to your own seat, folding taehyun's jersey neatly to keep in your bag. the both of you continued on with your days as if you two didn't interact alone in the classroom earlier.

ᶻ 𝗓 𐰁

beeep

the referee blew the whistle, signalling the entire court that the match has offically started. the crowd of spectators, splited evenly with supporters from both schools, cheered for the school they were rooting for. your school had formed a chant for the boys, led by a group of boys who were also close friends with taehyun, everyone followed their lead, shouting their lungs out in unison. you and your friends joined in for the thrill of it, screaming as loud as you possibly could.

"taehyun's quite good, right yn?" yujin whispered shouted into your ear, loud enough for you to hear. you gasped, smacking her shoulders to shut up as she laughed loudly at your reaction. you watched as taehyun shoots the ball into the hoop and scoring with ease, his teammates running up to him, giving him a quick hi five before continuing on with the match.

the match was intense, points scored from each school one after another, it seemed like it was going to be a tie. however, down to the last ten minutes, the court quietened down, everyone watching the match intently, the shoes of the boys squeeking as they tried taking the ball away from the opposing team's grasp. you felt your heart beating in anticipation, you wanted your school to win so badly, you wanted to see taehyun and his team happy.

suddenly, taehyun ran towards the group and hit the ball out of the opposing team's hands, giving your school a chance to attack. taehyun hastily dribbled the ball towards the other end of the court, his teammates trailing behind him, shouting his name to just shoot. taehyun gulped anxiously, one slip up and everything will be ruined. he positioned himself perfectly, tossing the ball up, towards the basketball hoop. the ball circled around the rim, making everyone in the court stare at it in anticipation, your school praying and hoping that it'll go in while the opposing school supports prayed that it rebounded.

after what seemed like an eternity, the ball miraculously went through the hoop, as the referee blowed the final whistle, ending the match. the whole crowd cheered in pure glee, some even jumping off the standees, and over the barricades to run towards the boys to congratualate them. you ran forward towards the barricades, trying to spot taehyun. you saw as he was surrounded by his friends and team, getting jumped on for making such a clean winning shot for the school. you giggled to yourself at the scene unfolding infront of you, not realising that the two of you just made eye contact. his friend whispering into his ear, making his flustered. taehyun shrugged his friend, who was basically climbing on taehyun like a koala, off his shoulder to walk towards you.

"congrats tae!" you smiled at him, proud of his accomplishment. taehyun gave you a wink, "told you i'd do well." you glared at him, your jaw dropping at what he said.

"i'm leaving bye." you coldly said as a joke. taehyun chuckled, pulling back to the barricades, your faces only inches apart, your breathing hitched when you felt taehyun's hot breath on your skin. you wished you could hug him right now, but the only obstacle blocking the both of you from doing so was the flimsy metal barricade.

"can i?" taehyun asked suddenly, his eyes staring into yours fondly. you nod your head, feeling flustered already. in a second, his lips were already on yours, it was quick yet enjoyable. your face flushed, the boys in the background screaming and slapping each other, cheering for taehyun. you buried your face in taehyun's shoulder out of embarrassment. taehyun turned around to quickly flip them off before tilting your head up to look at him.

"i'll bring you out after this." taehyun informed you as you nodded your head, waving a quick bye to him before running out of the court to find your friends who were probably too tired to wait for you in the court. you were so giggly and bubbly as you started smacking your friends while telling them everything that just occurred.

[echantedtoon]

HIIII!!!!

Congrats on 500!!! i dont say it enough but i really do love ur work and istg i need to start interacting more to say it >.<. but since you're doing requests-

If you're willing to do Yanplatonic stuff- Do you mind if you do Yanplatonic Kokushibo x Sister reader? (theres so little. i write it for a reason ;-;) But if you're not- How about Yan! Raihan x Reader? Can be anything you want really- I'm just starved of Raihan content in general rn :(((

If you're not comfortable with yandere requests then PLEASE feel free to get rid of/ignore! Again, Congratulations on your milestone, IM SO PROUDDDD!!!

-TML

THANK YOU!! 😭 Why not both? warnings for mentioning of death and killing in Michikatsu's part only and both parts having yandere themes. Raihan's being more romantic than Kokushibos bit. @trancylovecraft

*It was really strange in the beginning. Everyone knew that Michikatsu being the oldest and 'normal' twin was assigned to be your father's heir while Yoriichi was unwanted and almost killed but was now destined to go be a priest come his tenth birthday. So where did that leave you?

*The youngest Tsugikuni that no one expected to be born. One heir was all that was needed so what to do with a third child let alone a daughter. You were lucky not to be a twin or more because perhaps their fate would've repeated with you. But since you were both unexpected and unplanned everyone just sorta..kinda didn't know what to do with you.

*Your father had no interest in you from the beginning but he'd be damned if he became a laughing stick twice with a son like Yoriichi so while he didn't care about your existence or bother to interact with you, he ordered that you become 'a proper lady' and one worthy of your status. 

*Which was why your favorite parent was your mother. Even if you couldn't spend a lot of time with her either because of your harsh studies and your orders to be kept away from Yoriichi who was always around your mother. 

*As a result most of your studies coisided with Michikatsu's minus his fighting training. So you both developed a greater bond than the one's you had with either parent or Yoriichi. He'd take you to sneak out and visit Your other older brother Yoriichi. Not as often as Michikatsu saw him but it was enough for you to love your silent but kind older brother too. Until everything changed.

*Yoriichis true talent was revealed. Your mother passed away. Yoriichi visited you in the middle of the night just to hug you, nothing more, before leaving in the middle of the night. Michikatsu's jealousy increased as did the anger your father possessed. Unbeknownst to you, Your brother was intentionally taking up all your father's attention from Yoriichi not only to make his father forget about the more talented twin in risk of loosing everything, but also to steer his new found frustration off of you. And it worked scarily well. 

*Now without your mother and older brother you were left in the care of maids and tutors and barely saw your remaining family anymore. You tried to make it work, really you did. You tried studying hard and becoming the best high society woman you could possibly be to make your father and Michikatsu proud. It worked...a little too well. Because not only did you accidentally overhear your father make arrangements for your arranged marriage to a known wrathful and brutal man, but he planned on not telling you at all until the day of said wedding so you'd have no choice but to go through with it.

*Terrified you sought out your older brother in the middle of his studying to explain what was happening and that you feared for your life. Michikatsu's expression is blank as he calmly regards the way you're shaking and hyperventilating as tears weld up in your eyes. The man he spoke of marrying you too happened to be one of his father's most powerful men. Ruthless in both killing enemies and how he treated others in general so the fear was warranted.

*Michikatsu himself was already married with his wife expecting their first child in six more months so he supposed their father decided that it was time his daughter was married off too. He didn't do anything. Didn't even offer to calm you. Just calmly close his book and place it down. "Have you tried talking to Father or this man?" "You know he wont listen to what I say! He never did! What am I going to do?!" "I see...I'll talk to him tomorrow. I can't guarantee I'll change his mind but perhaps I'll see what I can do. In the meantime my wife is lonely by herself. Why don't you go keep her company for a while?"

*You didn't know what to do. Your life was about to be ruined. But you had to trust your brother to try and steer your father's mind from this. You spent the next three days with your sister-in-law helping her along with maids in preparation for you new niece or nephew. So imagine your shock when news reached you both of your husband to be being found slain by a demon. His body sliced so badly that no one recognized him at first. It should've been a relief but it was really more shock than anything else. Your father was furious however he himself would pass away soon as well. Tripping over the second balcony and passing away. 

*You didn't know what happened to either one of them but the look in your brother's eyes when you asked him about it told you all you needed to know. "Do not worry about it. After all ..Big brother will always be there to look after his little sister."

-You catch his attention either one of two ways. You either keep defeating him and become a second rival to Leon or you are completely indifferent by anything he does. Since he's literally Galar's strongest gym leader let's go with the second option and say you got his attention by being indifferent.

-Raihan is a good looking guy. Very handsome. His friends know it. He knows it. And his fans REALLY know it. It's no secret Raihan has acquired fans of both genders from just his charms and looks alone outside of his strength and status. He can make anyone swoon if he tried hard enough. So that's why when you came along with your indifference it was like a surprise slap across the face to him.

-You were one of the people at the local meet and greet after that year's Pokemon championship. As usual he was unable to defeat Leon but the crowd's after pleading for autographs and pictures from both the gym leaders and Champion was ready in wait for them. He loved greeting his fans. Practically head diving first into the crowds to supply selfies and autographs to his endless fans. So when he meets a group of ladies bashfully waiting for their turn, he gives them the good old charming smile and wink. It sends the whole group into giggles. Except for you. Your bored, deadpanned face never changed other than giving an eye roll.

-This genuinely catches him off guard. Usually no one ever did that to him so perhaps you're a fan jealous you're not getting his full attention. Nope. When he walks over and tries to chat you up you shut him down immediately. "Hey there.~" "NO." No. Just ..No? He hasn't said more than two words to you and you're not even looking at the wide eyed gym leader next to you. "I'm not interested in whatever womanizing antics you got to say. Beat it before I make you." A choked sound of surprise leaves him at that.

-Him? A womanizer?! Sure he was flirty and stuff but that's how he always was! He tries to say something but instead you walk away. Turns out you were only there because your friends dragged you along with them but you didn't want to see Raihan. To you he came off as full of himself and the way he just flirted with everyone just reeked of womanizing behavior.

-Raihan is left shocked, confused, a little bit hurt..and a LOT intrigued by you. He's never met someone like you before and he wants to find out more! He heard one of your friends mentioned your name and looks you up later on social media ended up finding your socials. Naturally he follows you back and flips through them. There's...not a lot really. Just a couple blogged posts from your friends and family, a few pictures of said friends and family and some of your Pokemon, a funny meme or two and.... That's it. Apparently you're not online much and you don't follow a lot of people outside of friends, family, and a few blogs that was about Pokemon.

-Well surely you would appreciate it and follow him by after seeing he followed you. Nope. You straight up ignored him even if you noticed at all. It drives him crazy. Posting everything from cute pics of his team to beautiful views from the back of his flying to selfies of him showing off his admittedly impressive build. But nope. Zero. He'd spend hours obsessively flipping through notifications for any reblogs, comments, or even a like on anything. Nope. Nothing. You don't bother to notice him. And when he tries to get you to notice him, you also ignore any comments or otherwise by him.

-Its frustrating to him! All he wants is to be recognized by you! To show you that you were wrong and he was a really good person. When messaging you online didn't work he tried in person. After all you barely posted anything so maybe you didn't really go online that much. He found your work place in Wyndon City by a picture you posted once of you getting promoted at work. A small little Pokemon groomer's shop. He went there under the guise of getting his duroludon's metal body polished so you wouldn't be freaked out by suddenly seeing him there outta the blue.

-He saw you as soon as you walked in. Brushing down the fur of a minccino as he walked in right in front of everyone. You looked up from the Pokemon with a smile but was shocked and then frowned as soon as you saw his smiling face. "What are YOU doing here?" "I'm in Wyndon visiting Lee but I figured my duroludon could use a good polishing after so long. I heard this place does a good job grooming Pokemon so can I get the big guy in?" You still frowned but didn't seem to be none the wiser. Only grumpily ringing him up as he paid and your coworker took his duroludon to be polished up. 

-"I also want to apologize to you." "For what?" "I may have come on in a way that made you uncomfortable. Sorry for that. I swear I'm not like that all the time. It's mostly just an act for the fans. They have a certain image of me." "So you act like a womanizer for publicity stunts?" "Hey. We all do. You think Piers is really introverted and shy? Nah man. He might be punk goth but he's not that emo. It's just what his fans like to see from him." "....Alright. I guess I can buy that. Apology accepted."  "Good. Since we're all cleared up now..Can I make it up to you with dinner?" "Really?" "Really! It's not a date but I would like to get to know you better since I never met anyone like you before. So what do you say?" "....I get off at five. Remember it's not a date."

-He couldn't have been happier. It was a start of a long road of living you.

[scorpiusmalfoylovesoscarwilde]

I've said it before, I'll say it again, and I'm sure it won't be the last time. I AM SICK AND BLOODY TIRED OF THESE MFS, HALF OF WHO DONT EVEN CARE ABOUT CURSED CHILD, BITCHING AND MOANING ABOUT AN ANGSTY TEEN DARING TO BE AN ANGSTY TEEN, I WILL FIGHT THE LOT OF YOU

(this is gonna be a bit long and probably incoherent so sit down and fucking listen to me 🔫 stick with me because I'm not just complaining about albus haters)

eVERYBODY wants cOoMmpllEeXx relatable HUMAN characters - and then SHIT themselves when the flaws a CHILD has isn't just 🥺 uwu im socially awkward and traumatised 🥺. that's why scorpius doesn't get this fuckass treatment, because his terrible human flaw is that he's a bit shit at conversation and gets sad about his dead mum (generalised understatement, but this post isnt about him. dont come for me i love him 🫶🏻)

god forbid albus, who feels unloved and unwanted (with valid evidence for a teenager), albus who feels completely out of place and outcast from his entire famously-close-knit family, ablus who is well known by the world by default via Harry and hates the attention and high expectations, albus who then gets targeted and bullied by his peers because he's not as perfect and brilliant as his father, albus who is then isolated from his one friend because Harry is making irrational ptsd fueled decisions, albus who tells Harry completely sincerely that he knows he's unlikeable but he'll try and change himself and be more like his siblings because he genuinely believes that's what Harry and everyone else whos had the misfortune of meeting him wants, albus who spends the entire play trying to prove himself and fix things via idiotic childish decisions BECAUSE HES A WHOLE UNSTABLE CHILD

god forbid that CHILD doesn't react like a patient, supported, well adjusted, level headed adult. god forbid he reacts outwardly. god forbid he reacts at all, my bad. clearly he should just sniffle a bit as if he doesn't feel suffocated and helpless by everything in his life, because obviously hes just a spoiled brat who doesn't know what real suffering is. god forbid he complains or feels anything negatively, or doesn't quite grasp that other people are struggling too because he is too busy trying so hard to deal with himself and his declining mental health the best he can with basically no support or understanding. god forbid he isn't completely perfect.

you all sound like some fucking boomer telling teenagers they don't know what real struggling is, they aren't mentally ill, they dont have any problems because they have a roof over their head, they should all go to war kids are too soft these days 😫😖😱 fUCKING‼️SHUT UP‼️

he does things wrong but he knows he does and he does everything he can to fix it! and he is fourteen!!! do none of you remember what being fourteen is like 😭😭 I swear half of you have got to be basically fourteen yourselves cmon man

cause I'm seeing this fucking pattern a lot recently. not just for albus, not just in this fandom, everywhere. ‼️ no one can fucking handle flawed characters anymore ‼️ the only thing any character is allowed to have wrong with them is trauma apparently, otherwise they have to be perfect, and I'm getting sick of it. characters and stories are meant to reflect real life, they're meant to help shape our world view, why are you expecting everyone to be fucking perfect??? what happened to nuance? what happened to understanding character development? you are all acting like characters and people are so black and white. either they're perfect or they're insufferable and evil. I won't lie, the most common victims i've noticed of this are women. but the flawed women are typically demonised, whereas the men are typically turned into uwu baby boys who actually aren't capable of doing anything wrong and then fanon goes nuts making them into ittle wittle victims. and I'm so fucking sick of all of it, I hate this. (obviously this is not a strict rule. Albus Potter, and also Albus Dumbledore now I mention it, are demonised beyond belief)

BRING BACK FLAWS AND BRING BACK NOT COMPLETELY WRITING OFF A CHARACTER BECAUSE THEY DARE TO BE HUMAN

I AM FED UP, ALBUS POTTER GET BEHIND ME

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

WIBTA if i cut off someone reaching out for help on tumblr? i am a very anxious person. ive been on tumblr a very long time because most all other social media terrifies me as someone who grew up with the wild west internet a decade past (im in my late 20s) so i feel sometimes with how reckless and spurractic people can be online in chatroom and especially clearly public platforms where any stranger, malicious or otherwise can just archive your digital presence for personal use.

more recently as someone who has been here during the pornban and as an asexual really enjoyed the quiet with no drama farming and a slow pace to talk about more unique political topics in a measured way it is something im strangely nostalgic for and a great example of my sensibilities to people when they insist that i use other platforms like discord or twitter or whatever clone for these services comes out of the old guard introducing feature creep to copy everyone else or any other indi "were the anti corporate version" of the endless scroll apps. i just dont want it. tumblr is special because im desktop only, been here for years, and i have kept track of every single change made so i have manually adjusted the change through hacks to evade every bad decision on here and make my set up look identical to how it was in 2010. so let it be understood that i tend to be a loney person because of this stubbornness. web 3.0 is too dangerous to people with addictive tendencies that my adhd brings out and my need to wear my heart on my sleeve. so i hope i defended my personality type enough to show why someone like me would see a post about some horrible abuses they have fell victim to who also share alot of the marginalized status as me and writing depressive things in the replys of others posts as to attention seek about it.

i directly interact with this person, not only to check if they are real (but wow, modern chat bots make this part horrifying for me. we really cant ever know for sure what is real anymore. trying to find warmth on the internet feels impossible now a days) i have multiple conversations at this point both venting and just casually shooting the shit. but the begging for me to constantly repost their paypal makes me so nervous in a way that i feel so guilty for because it reminds me of all the scams that get associated with this kind of ebegging and the reminder that capitalism takes away all warmth from human interaction to make them purely transnational and conditional. but then it just has been escalating where im so scared that now its not enough that im reposing on my 8 follower, all mutual blog, they are asking me to share it on other socials. accounts i do not have i have a flip phone and a laptop and i am tinkering with a windows 7 tower that will never be connected to the internet so i can always have software sit perfectly in its time capsule for when i need it. i do not have a way to help this person outside of what i learned from collage psyche classes. a part of me is so scared to just abruptly cut them off and just delete my entire account like i tend to do often on tumblr for a multitude of reasons, its a part of what lets people survive being here this long but i worry that would crush them if i did that, i dont want to make them feel more hopeless and unwanted then they already talk about. but i am text on the internet through a screen. i can only do so much. so would i be the asshole if i just deleted my account with a "i hope you hang in there, the world is a harsh place but keep moving" to cut someone so similar to me who is struggling out of my life?

What are these acronyms?

[nouvxllev]

Might be a bit of a interesting ask, but I love your work and wanted to ask if you could write something for me? And I mean just like your thoughts not a story! I know you’ve got a lot on your plate (I am eagerly awaiting your pippa ficts.🤭) I suffer from sleep paralysis, and it’s honestly been something I have had since I was a child. It’s hard to sleep, and sometimes I actually don’t even want to go to bed because I get anxiety. And if I do have it the next day I feel weak and just exhausted. It doesn’t happen all the time just when I’m stressed. But I was wondering (here come the comforting thoughts) I am obsessed with Emma myers, (love the girl. Cutest human on earth) and I wanted to know what her characters would do to help reader? ( Enid and pippa) Specifically reader who is scared and uncomfortable. Tired but doesn’t want to sleep. Whatever thoughts you have! (And if you add a few pippa thoughts I wouldn’t mind. She’s be all logical and tell you it can’t hurt you🤣) 🫶

enid sinclair (roommates)

enid knows dreams. nightmares. nights where she couldn't sleep for her life because of her mom, a tired day of being happy for everyone, just anything that could wake her in a cold sweat. but she never experienced sleep paralysis, the thought itself was terrifying, and the stories she heard was bad enough. but what would happen if the person she cares and adores for the most experiences them without notice? it's painful. agonizing, of course. she was always someone who looked out for others, how could she miss this part of you that ached and longed for her touch on nights where you wanted to scream for her, warn her that there was something in the room approaching you. approaching her. scream that there was something bothering you, your heart pounding, unwanted pressure lingering in your chest, and your body feeling like you were drowning in air. you endured this for weeks, maybe even months, just especially when its examination week. or just any regular day where you feel stressed. you thought you could take it, that you'd endure it. having to wake up or just watch the morning light appear in front of you with pure exhaustion the next day was fine in exchange for enids peace. but one day, you woke up in a pool of your own sweat. heart beating and yearning to be free from your chest that you wanna rip out and lie down, feeling nothing but happiness that you dont have to suffer anymore. you feel exhausted, uncomfortable in your own space, in your body, in your own silence. the room was dark, and the atmosphere was heavy. you thought enid drifted off to her own side of the bed like she always does. then you find that she isnt. id like to think that enid doesnt sleep until you do, its that feeling of reassurance and safeness that your loved one is at peace in sleep. when you woke up that night, you just couldnt bear the burden of every ounce of stress and weakness in your body that you cant escape even in your dreams, you just broke down right in front of her.

you told her everything. down to your weaknesses, the creatures and hallucinations that lurk in your eyes even in reality you fear them, how it torments you from time to time by going after enid instead of you, the stress and anxiety of a day and knowing something awaits for you when you drift off to sleep, the feeling of death getting closer and closer yet youre chained down in your own body, you told her everything.

enid would wrap her arms around you through it, inviting you on her bed. one hand on your back parallel to your heart with another wrapped around your waist. she was bringing you closer to her and soothing your heart in so many ways more than one. she listens to you so attentively, and also curses her for not noticing soon. throughout the night, she comforted you right in her arms, reminding that youre not in this alone if shes with you. even she cried for the scars that you want to heal from. she'd always ask if it would be okay if you two slept together in the same bed, she'd even create a fort of all of her squishmallows and other plushies around you so that youll feel safe. that was the first night you ever got a wink of sleep.

after that, enid researched everything about sleep paralysis and what causes it. she knows from the get go that its inevitable, theres no mental and total cure, but she's so damn confident that she'll atleast cure or treat your sleep paralysis episodes. obviously, you mustve done research yourself on how to stop it yet ended up with the same failed results, so she refrains from saying the same thing over and over again.

but she'd check up on you literally everyday and every second. when youre sleeping, she doesnt until she gets the affirmative that youre fine and awake, looking out for tiny whispers that youre screaming in your mind, visible discomfort/fright, eyes twitching or your body jerking awake.

when you wake up, youre suddenly bombarded with questions from enid asking if youre okay or did you sleep well, offering you everything she has to offer from snacks to a simple girls night so itll take your mind off of things. youre getting ready to fall asleep, enid is already there by your side, offering a hug or a squishmallow. this gets more apparent when youre stressed, enid would literally take everything away from you and tells you to relax with her. offering a gentle massage, stress balls she kept away from her closet, hugging you like theres no tomorrow.

outside of the dorm, enid is still attached to your hip. making sure that no one will talk to you about something thatll stress you out. if someone did, they'll just get a half transformed enid sinclair and if theyre unfortunate enough, a hospital bill. since youre exhausted, enid basically does everything for you even if you insist that youre fine with doing it yourself. she gives you a big gasp and a shock face like "oh l/n/y/n you are NOT doing all of this by yourself, let me help you or so help me god!!" and its just eating food or walking to a certain place up the stairs.

when its just the two of you, she prepares her bed (or your bed, whichever you prefer that night) to be the most comforting thing ever. a laptop on her lap if you ever want to watch something to fall asleep in (hopefully) peace, snacks if you ever feel peckish, and some things to make everything go away.

if you ever encounter a sleep paralysis episode, enid is already on your side. hugging you as you cry with your head buried in the crook of her neck as you hugged her back. no words attached, just comforting physical touch that calms you down from time to time. if you ever needed some alone time, she accepts your requests and goes off to her side until youre ready to invite her back or fall asleep on your own.

in what you fear, enid will always make sure that your peace is certain. awake or not, she'll be there by your side. she overdoes it sometimes, sure, but she gives you the boundaries you need. just such a ball of sunshine that take cares of literally everyone around her, especially you.

pippa fitz amobi (childhood friend, takes place during/after good girl bad blood)

you always thought pip was smart. she was logical, academic achiever thats for sure and she was always so realistic with everything. id like to think pip was the first one to notice there was something off when the two of you were still a child. not your friends, not even your parents, but it was pip that had everything sorted out for you. she noticed how you always snuck out late at night to sleep at her place, always calling her in the most darkest hours of the night, she'd be concerned if you even slept at all. but pip was a good friend, she always had an eye of you, until her mind was consumed by the andie bell case.

pip is a caring one, you know that deep down your soul, yet she was never the one who took care for her self. you stopped talking about your own stress, anxiety, and episodes in fear that it would double the amount of things she has to worry about in her own time, so you gave her space. maybe a little too much space that she started worrying for you even more, always reassuring you that shes here for you. you always responded with an im fine and assure her that youre at your best.

that was until pip broke into your home (old fashion pippa fitz amobi style) with a literal folder, food that her mom made at home in a little plastic bag, and she was decked out with pjs head to toe. she looked tired, not even a trace of pure rest in her eyes. thats when you realize the two of you needed eachother to fall asleep in peace, arms wrapped around eachother as if eternity lies within the hands of the other.

you knew pip was already so restless because of her case so you didnt have a choice but nail your mouth shut and let her inside your home. you thought itd just be a check up from pip from time to time and she'd be on her merry way until she sat you down on your bed. fixed your cushions, even set up the night light for the two of you. you question her but youre just met with silence for the most part.

when shes done, she'd sit beside you, open the folder she has on her hands, and tell you everything she researched for the past month or week youve been giving her the silent treatment and youre just completely bewildered by the sight. its logical, rational, and completely in-depth.

you almost tell her that its all pointless, you appreciate the thought and the hours she put into it and even negelcted her case for a bit, but it was just none of the ordinary. no matter how many times she reminds you that its harmless, its in your head or hallucinations, it wont hurt you, its not helping.

that was until she was opened up to you herself. id like to think that pip has recurring nightmares that would lead to sleep paralysis because of the shit she went through, she literally saw someone get shot several times and she couldnt do anything but watch in terror. id like to think thats the same in her episodes.

after all that time apart, it really affected her mentally and physically. she couldnt sleep properly without having to check up on you. you both comfort eachother by just hugging nonstop, whispering sweet nothings to bring a sense of comfort and reassurance until you both fell asleep in eachothers arms.

the two of you needed eachother anyway.

really important a/n:

im honestly honored that you came to me about your own personal problems and asked me about my thoughts, so sorry if this took so long. even as someone anonymous, i imagine that takes some pretty big courage to do. im sorry for what you’ve been enduring literally all your life, especially about something that causes you pure exhaustion, more stress, and anxiety of living your life. i dont know if you got used to this routine, but if you did, that just makes it all the more worrying that you're just familiar with repetitive episodes of sleep paralysis as a child to now. we're both two strangers on the internet that dont know our personal lives or what we really do in our spare time, but i assure you anon that everything will soon be okay. maybe not today or next week or even next year, but peace will soon come your way.

im just somebody who writes for hundreds of people to see and hope my little stories bring just simple carefree and happiness for people on the internet, but if youre willing and consenting to talk or just take your mind off something, im always available on here, just dm me!

love u anon!! just remember that even as someone you dont really know, im here for you. stay safe out there <3!!

[phagodyke]

argh..