#i hurt them too
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Mornings Are Brighter With You In My Life
It's Slate's birthday, and Miro and Lucas want to give him a surprise. Fluffy and sweet, just these three being absolutely head over heels for each other.
Rating: G
Word count: 3101
(I recommend reading the other posts under #koboldwrites, just for context, but if you just want to jump in instead, go right ahead! This is the first time in a long while I've shared my writing, and I'm really excited! I hope you enjoy!)
Slate woke up slowly, consciousness creeping in like the first beam of sun through his window in the morning. He was warm, comfortable, and very much at ease, with a contented feeling settled deep in his chest. His eyes were closed, but he could feel the soft, fluffy blankets of Miro’s bed tangled around him. For once, he didn’t feel the pressing weight of deadlines, of stress, of a thousand responsibilities he had to worry about. Right then, he knew that the only thing that mattered was that he was relaxed and happy.
After what felt like a blissful eternity, he felt the bed dip next to him slightly, and a hand gently brushed a lock of his hair out of his face.
“Darling dearest, are you awake?” Lucas asked softly, and Slate groaned. He very much did not want to wake up. Lucas laughed quietly. “I’ll take that as a yes,” he murmured, and moments later, Slate felt him start to press light kisses along his jaw, before his lips found Slate’s. He kissed him, slow and sweet, and the warm feeling in Slate’s chest grew. He pushed Lucas away gently so that he could catch his breath, his eyes blinking open. He met Lucas’s bright blue eyes, which were full of a love that he knew was mirrored in his own.
“I love you,” Slate mumbled, his voice still rough with sleep. Lucas smiled, holding Slate’s hand and gently rubbing a thumb across his knuckles.
“I love you too,” he whispered, as if it were a confession and not a fact that they shared among themselves as often as they could. Lucas scooted closer to him on the bed, one arm wrapped around his waist, and a leg catching behind Slate’s ankle. This time, Slate was the one who initiated the kiss.
“Miro wanted me to tell you he’s making breakfast,” Lucas breathed, when they had to separate for air yet again.
“He can wait,” Slate said firmly, leaning in to kiss him again. Lucas melted against him, his other hand threading through Slate’s hair and lightly scratching his scalp. Slate quickly turned to putty, kissing Lucas back with even more enthusiasm. Lucas laughed, which only ended up making Slate laugh and quickly putting an end to their making out session.
“What?” Slate asked, still grinning as he rested his forehead against Lucas’s.
“You’re just so Sol damned adorable,” Lucas said, grinning back at him even as Slate’s face quickly turned a bright shade of red. He turned and hid his face in the pillow, letting out a whine.
“You can’t just say things like that,” he said, muffled, and he felt Lucas kiss the back of his head again.
“And why not? Can’t I compliment my lovely boyfriend?” Lucas teased gently, and Slate buried his face even further into the pillow, even as he couldn’t help but smile to himself.
“You’re right, you should go compliment Miro,” he teased back, and Lucas hummed. He pressed a kiss right behind Slate’s ear, making him shiver.
“I will, later, but right now, you’re the one I’m focusing on. It is your birthday, after all,” he said, and Slate felt a jolt go through him.
“It is!” he said excitedly, suddenly sitting upright. Lucas startled, having to quickly lean back himself to avoid getting hit in the face. He laughed, giving Slate a warm smile.
“It is,” he agreed, lightly kissing him again. “Happy birthday, love,” he said earnestly.
“Thank you,” Slate said, squeezing his hand. There was a pause, and then Lucas bit his lip, clearly fighting the urge to laugh.
“You didn’t- you didn’t forget today was your birthday, did you?” he asked, a mischievous grin on his face.
“Wh- no!” Slate protested, a little too quickly. He didn’t forget, so much as get so caught up in the wonderful fact that he was warm and comfortable and loved that it didn’t seem that important at the time. What could he say?
“If you say so,” Lucas teased, kissing Slate’s hand.
“Lucas, sweetling, when I told you to go make sure Slate was up, this wasn’t really what I meant,” Miro said, standing in the doorway with a smile on his face. Slate looked up, his face lighting up as soon as he saw him.
“Darling! Get over here,” he said, laughing and reaching out for him. Miro laughed, quickly closing the distance and joining the two of them on the bed.
“Mm, just for a minute,” Miro hummed, kissing the top of Slate’s head. Slate hummed happily, the feeling of warm contentment only growing in his chest. “I made pancakes, and I don’t want them to get cold,” he said, and Slate paused. As tempting of a reason that was to get up, he was warm and comfortable where he was. And now that he had both of his boyfriends, what else could he ask for?
“There’s fresh fruit, too,” Lucas added, and Slate blinked, twisting to look at him.
“Really?” he asked, his eyes wide. Fresh fruit was expensive, and he honestly didn’t know if either of them could afford it- he knew for a fact Miro couldn’t. And sure, Lucas had been an Upper, but that didn’t mean he had the money for fresh fruit anymore.
“Yep,” Lucas hummed casually, kissing his cheek. “I knew you mentioned that you were wanting some peaches, so I went ahead and got a couple for you. And some strawberries, too.” Slate knew the look of pure joy and amazement was shining clear on his face as he looked at his wonderful, thoughtful, caring boyfriends.
“What did I ever do to deserve you?” he asked. He was met with a soft smile from Lucas, and with Miro gently squeezing him in a hug from behind.
“You were yourself,” Miro said easily, and suddenly Slate couldn’t hide the blush that crept across his cheeks.
“Didn’t you say you made pancakes? That sounds great, why don’t we, go, go eat those?” Slate stammered, and Miro grinned.
“You can’t escape the compliments so easily, you know,” he teased, pressing a kiss to the back of his neck. Slate wrinkled his nose and squeezed his eyes shut, though he couldn’t help but smile too. He felt a hand on his cheek, making him open his eyes almost immediately. He saw Lucas staring fondly into his eyes, tilting his head slightly.
“Beautiful,” he breathed, and Slate felt his cheeks warm even more.
“You can’t just say things like that,” he whined, wanting both to hide out of embarrassment and to stay where he was, comfortable with both of his boyfriends.
“Mm, I think I can though,” Lucas countered, leaning in and pressing a kiss to the tip of his nose. That did it for Slate, making him hide his face in his hands as he heard both Miro and Lucas laughing at him.
“I love you,” Miro said, and Slate opened his mouth to say it back, only to be interrupted as his stomach let out a very loud growl.
“Love you too,” Slate said, mildly dying inside but with a sheepish smile on his face.
“You know, maybe breakfast isn’t such a bad idea after all,” Miro said, and Slate paused to consider it for a moment. He was hungry, but at the same time…
“But it’s comfortable and warm here,” he pointed out.
“I mean, who says you have to leave? We could do breakfast in bed,” Lucas suggested, and Slate’s face lit up.
“Please,” he breathed. “That, that sounds wonderful, I’d love that,” he said, looking hopefully between the two of them. That sounded heavenly, and now that Lucas had mentioned it, he didn’t know what he’d do if he had to get up now. Miro laughed, gently kissing him.
“Then we’ll do that,” he said, his voice overflowing with fondness. “Sweetie, you stay here, and me and Lucas will be right back,” he promised. Slate pouted as both of them left, only reluctantly letting go of Lucas’s hand as he got up. He knew they’d be right back, but it was the principle of the thing. He flopped back on the bed, dramatically covering his eyes with an arm.
“I am simply going to waste away,” he mumbled, still grinning to himself. Sol, he loved his boyfriends so much. They were so sweet, and kind, and they were doing all of this for his birthday. This feeling of sheer joy and contentment that he felt around them was something precious, he knew, and he wanted to cradle it close to himself. To keep it safe. He knew that it couldn’t last forever- not as long as he had to stay in the Upper- but that didn’t mean he wasn’t going to enjoy it for as long as he could while it was still here.
Mere moments later, he felt the bed dip under him again, and he peeked out from under his arm to see Lucas and Miro smiling at him.
“You haven’t gone back to sleep, have you?” Miro teased, and Slate made a small offended noise in the back of his throat.
“I could never!” he said dramatically, sitting up with a grin. “Not when I know my very wonderful boyfriends are here,” he said, a light blush spreading across his cheeks.
Lucas smiled as he carefully set down the three glasses of milk he was carefully balancing, before leaning over and kissing Slate.
“You’re so cute,” he murmured, and Slate felt his face abruptly turn a much darker red. Lucas laughed, even as he moved to help Miro unload the armloads of plates and food he was carrying.
“There’s the breakfast,” he said as Lucas helped him set the last of it down on the nightstand. “And here’s the bed,” he added, getting on the bed and scooting closer to Slate. He wrapped an arm around his waist, making Slate melt against him as Lucas quickly got on his other side. Lucas pressed another kiss to the base of his jaw, making him shiver.
“Good?” he asked, and Slate hummed contentedly.
“Very,” he mumbled, shifting so that he was a little more squished between them. “Sol, I love you both,” he said, smiling warmly at both of them. Miro grinned, nudging him with his knee.
“And we love you too, though you really should eat something,” he prodded, handing Slate a plate and offering the larger plate with an impressively large stack of pancakes. Slate laughed, taking a couple. After some more shuffling in order to go get the forgotten syrup- which was a necessity- Slate was finally able to take a bite. He hummed happily as the flavor hit his tongue, sweet and warm all at once.
“What do you think?” Miro asked, looking over at Slate as he grinned at him, his chin propped up on his hand.
“It’s so good!” Slate mumbled around the bite in his mouth. He quickly swallowed, offering him a sheepish smile. “It, it really is. I love it,” he said, hoping that his expression was able to convey all the love he felt that his words couldn’t do justice to. From the responding lovestruck grin on Miro’s face, he was fairly confident it had worked.
“With that good of a review, I need to try them too, you know,” Lucas said, reaching for a plate. Before he could, however, Miro quickly intervened, grabbing it and holding it out of Lucas’s reach.
“Nope, not like that you won’t,” he said, a mischievous, teasing note in his voice. “Slate said it was good, but not great, so maybe there’s an element missing. Part of the experience.” Slate didn’t even bother to hide the baffled expression he gave him at that.
“Miro, I love you, but what the hell are you talking about?” Lucas asked, fond exasperation clear in his tone. Miro’s grin only widened.
“Close your eyes, and open your mouth,” he said, and Slate could only watch, bemused, as Lucas did as Miro said, albeit with some hesitation. Stealthily, Miro snatched a piece of pancake from Slate’s plate and popped it in Lucas's mouth. As soon as he did, Lucas's eyes fluttered open, giving Miro a look of confused affection. Still, he gave in and chewed as Miro grinned smugly.
“You know what, it is very delicious,” Lucas said. “Though,” he hummed, pretending to think for a moment before grabbing Miro’s hand and pressing a kiss to his palm. “Not as sweet as you,” he said casually. A light dusting of pink spread across Miro’s cheeks, though he didn’t pull his hand back.
“You’re the one who’s sweet,” he complained, and Lucas only laughed. Slate nudged Lucas with his foot, giving him an innocent look.
“I don’t know, I think you’re both pretty sweet,” he said, and Miro raised one eyebrow.
“Oh? Really? Well, maybe you’d better check,” he said, also the perfect picture of innocence even as Slate’s face grew warm.
“I mean, I- I wouldn’t say no,” he mumbled, and Miro leaned in closer.
“So would you say yes then?” he teased, and Slate hid his face in his hands again. Sol, he really didn’t know if he could stand much more of Miro’s teasing before he simply combusted. All the same though, he still wanted to give him an answer that he was patiently waiting for.
“...yes,” he mumbled, he heard Lucas laugh, his heart soaring at the noise. Even if he was laughing at him, he still loved to hear it.
“Come here, then,” Miro said, and Slate let his hands fall, leaning into the soft, sweet kiss Miro offered. They parted after a moment, and Slate pretended to consider it to disguise the way his heart skipped a beat at the sheer tenderness of it all.
“Yeah, you’re, you’re pretty sweet,” he confirmed, unable to hide the still-present blush. “Though, mm, Lucas?” he asked, turning to him.
“Right here, darling,” Lucas said, before he leaned in and kissed him too. It was wonderful and just as full of love as Miro’s had been. When they both had to stop for air again, Slate nodded.
“Yeah you’re also, uh, very sweet,” he mumbled. He felt Lucas brush a lock of his hair out of his face before he gently pressed another kiss to his forehead.
“So are you,” he murmured, and the look he gave him was one so full of pure affection that he didn’t know what to do with himself for a moment. He was frozen to the spot, slowly turning redder and redder.
“Slate? You okay?” Miro asked, concerned.
“Just fine,” he squeaked, feeling like his face was on fire. Miro and Lucas both laughed, again, and Slate couldn’t help but smile back at them. Sol, he loved both of them so much.
“Oh! Slate! The strawberries!” Lucas said suddenly, bouncing slightly in excitement. “You need to try them, here,” he said, gesturing for Miro to hand him the bowl of fruit. When he did, Lucas quickly looked over his choices before picking one up and offering it to Slate. Slate looked between him, the strawberry, and back, before realizing what Lucas was offering. He leaned forward, closing his eyes as he bit into it. Lucas made a small surprised noise, but didn’t move his hand away as Slate opened his eyes and gave him a curious look. He paused, before he realized that Lucas probably had just meant for him to take it and eat it himself. He blushed again, quickly ducking his head.
“They’re really good. I love them, thank you,” Slate mumbled, and Lucas reached over and squeezed his hand.
“I’m glad,” he said softly. As Slate stared at the bowl of fruit- definitely not trying to avoid looking at Lucas- he couldn’t help but wonder…
“Miro, have you ever had fresh strawberries before?” he asked, looking up at him. Miro shrugged.
“I’ve never had any fresh fruit, actually. Dried, yeah, and otherwise preserved, but not fresh,” he replied, and Slate’s face lit up.
“You haven’t? We need to fix this right now, hold on,” he said, quickly reaching for the bowl. He thought of going for a strawberry, but hesitated. They were good, yeah, but his favorite fruit was easily peaches. And so, he might as well start him off with one of his favorites.
Grabbing a slice of peach, he offered it to Miro. “Here,” he said, and Miro raised an eyebrow at him.
“Are you going to hand feed me too?” he teased, but instead of getting even more embarrassed, Slate was hit with a sudden burst of impulsiveness.
“Of course,” he said confidently, and Miro grinned mischievously.
“Oh, are you now?” he said, leaning in closer.
“Yep,” Slate said, refusing to let himself hesitate. Miro looked at him, making eye contact as he bit down on the peach. He paused, humming, and his eyes went wide.
“Oh, it’s so good!” he mumbled. “And juicy! Hold on, what the fuck-” he hummed again, sitting back a little as he continued to chew. Slate and Lucas watched, amused. Sure, he may have been playing it up a little bit at first, but now it was clear that he was feeling genuine emotions about the peach. And, Sol, Slate didn’t know that he could feel so much joy just from watching someone he loved experience something he loved for the first time, but he was.
“Okay, why didn’t you both tell me about this sooner?” he said, pointing at both of them. “This, this is a crime that I didn’t get to taste this fucking amazing thing sooner,” he said, and Slate grinned.
“I’m glad you like it,” he said.
“Like it? Fuck no, I love it,” he said, smiling broadly. “And Sol damn it, I love both of you, too,” he said, and both Lucas and Slate gave him soft smiles right back.
“We love you too,” Lucas said.
“We do,” Slate agreed. “But, maybe we should, uh, actually eat before the pancakes get cold? I know you worked really hard on them, and the peach will spoil if we leave it much longer, and that would just be a crime,” Slate pointed out, glancing between his boyfriends.
“Mm, smart as always,” Miro said, kissing his cheek. “Why don’t we dig in then?”
As they lay there in bed, smiling and laughing as they fed each other from their own plates, the warm feeling that had been resting in Slate’s chest grew and grew. He’d never felt so loved before, but he was glad that he had this now.
#koboldspeaks#koboldwrites#at the request of my qpp who wanted this to be the first thing i post#thank you so much for encouraging me literally all of the time <3#also i love these three so much holy shit#don't get me wrong#i hurt them too#in many ways#but sometimes they're allowed to have nice things#sometimes
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We are well beyond canary in the coalmine warning levels with the way trans people and particularly trans women are treated on this site.
Maybe you've heard the metaphor of allowing wolves and sheep to share the same space, welcoming everyone. You end up with just wolves because allowing them in that space makes it unsafe for any sheep. Or the story about how a nazi goes into a dive bar and is refused service. The bartender then explains to someone else at the bar that if you serve them once they tell their friends and before you know it you're the nazi bar they all go to and normal customers don't feel safe.
Terfs and other bigots are seeing these targeted harassment campaigns succeed against trans women and rejoicing. They see Tumblr ban them and officially stand by those decisions as endorsement for their harassment. It's a sign to bigots across the internet that Tumblr is a good place for them.
And what's more is that a lot of us probably don't realize just how much trans women contribute to Tumblr. The women banned recently were sources of site-wide memes and posts I wasn't even aware originated from them.any years old memes and references can be traced back to trans women on this site.
How many of these folks have to be removed before this is no longer a site you want to be a part of it? Sure you cultivate your own experience, but you can't follow or interact with people who aren't here. And if I wanted to interact with the nazis and terfs I'd go to reddit.
I encourage everyone to reblog this. Trans women shouldn't have to be the only ones speaking out against the bigotry they're experiencing. They shouldn't be the only ones risking their blogs being nuked by staff. We have to stand with them.
#i didnt want to make this a post about how their being oppressed impacts you too#but honestly trans women contribute way more to this site's culture than pretty much any other single group of people#taking them out#and especially the more well known ones#absolutely destroys community#i think not just the trans community here though it definitely does that#but its also tearing away at the overall site community#if tumblr doesnt get shit under control this will hurt them more in the long run than anything else#protect trans women#thats what youve gotta do staff
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you said you were stuck in a time loop, which was fine. i feel like late-stage capitalism has us all in a time loop, ammiright? you came barging in at 5:33. in the morning. i hadn't even processed the idea of coffee.
but you had this look of utter panic in your eyes. terror like the ocean. you grabbed my cheeks. im in a time loop.
i don't know why in movies the first reaction is to deny it. when someone is panicking like that, it's not appropriate to ask them to calm down. it didn't matter if i believed it, what mattered was that you believed it so much that it was consuming you.
so here we are. i pour you some of the dark roast. "you look like utter and entire hell," i say.
you push your fingers into your eyes. "you always say that."
i try to think of something funny to say that i wouldn't have said on previous time loops, but jokes don't land without the proper timing (lol). "remind me to think -"
"-yeah, of a joke that only works in the future. and before you say anything, i know you're pissed i just stole your punchline." you bolt the coffee, which is wild. it's very hot. you don't seem to notice.
i blow on mine to cool it down. i both am very pissed at you and also i can't see you in this amount of panic without wanting to help. but i'm also not really sure what we are, not since i saw you kiss her like that, no offense. it just was like, kind of rude when you knew i liked you.
and besides. i'm just like, barely a person. i write omegaverse fanfiction. i love the concept of a time loop, but what the fuck am i gonna do? send an alpha in there? i open my mouth.
you point at me. "you're about to ask why me. and then say some disparaging shit about yourself. i'm just a nerd who plays dnd or something. that self-own is slightly different each time." you sigh. "i know you think you can't really help me. i don't know who can help me. i only came to you because you fucking believe me." you check your watch, sigh, and throw your head back. you cover your eyes with one hand. "i've come here on 26 separate revolutions," you say. "you have believed me every time. and yeah, i have no idea how you fit into this but i just -" you sigh again. "i just like fucking talking to someone about it."
"do you need more cof-" i start, but you're already holding the empty cup out. i frown at it. "you're not getting any more until you promise not to bolt this one like an animal."
you laugh a little and sit up, pushing your hair out of your face. "okay, that's new dialogue. but to be fair to you, i'm not usually this rude. i'm still pretty new at all of this." you check your watch again. another sigh. i guess you're cruising for a personal best in the Sigh Olympics.
i almost tell you im not an NPC but i've played enough video games to know i'm very much an NPC. i pour you another cup. "so what happens in the loop?"
"really bad explosion." you mutter into the mug. you put your elbows on the table (rude) and bury your face in your arms like an angsty teenager. one hand floats up while you talk, because evidently you literally can't talk without your hands. "i have to save the day and there's this bomb and i have no bomb training and it keeps moving, you know."
"do i die?"
you peek up from your arms. "yeah. bigtime. you keep trying to run or stay or do anything and you always super die."
"oh."
"to be fair, like, everyone dies in it though.... so you're in good company."
i hate that you make me laugh. i hate that being around you always feels tingly and strange, this electric tension between us. something that is evidently (given how you stuck your tongue down a stranger's throat literally 3 days ago) (well. 3 for me) super one-sided. i take a sip of my coffee and close my eyes.
i die today, i guess. a little spark of panic starts at the top of my hands and starts whipping up my wrists.
"shit," you say. you look at your watch and jump to your feet. "i have to go. if i can come back, i will. i am still trying to figure out when is best to do everything, you know? the order of stuff. maybe morning isn't good for us."
i look up at you and think about how you keep kissing me in the back of my car and in alleyways and in the dark. and i can never fucking get a read on you. and i also think about how incredibly panicked you look. how broken. how long have you been doing this? "i don't want to die," i say.
you glance downwards. "well, you're not really dead, you'll come back in the loop."
"but i will have died." my hands are shaking. i am trying really hard to stay calm.
you push your hands through your hair again. "i really have to go. i will have this discussion with the next version of you, though. it is like, something i am thinking about."
"but i don't get a next version," i say. i don't really have the language for this, because i haven't had 26 tries with you. i only have my memories: you, a week ago. drunk and telling me you loved me in my ear. you, kissing her anyway. you, months ago, throwing up on my birthday, whispering to me i ruin everything i touch, always, over and over. please don't ask. i can't ever fucking have that be you.
i run my finger along the rim of the mug. "i don't want to die in this one."
you seem baffled by this. "i get that but - time will reset, you'll be fine, you won't even remember we talked about this."
"but i know now." i stand up too. "i have to live the rest of this day knowing i could die. knowing i probably am going to."
"you could always die, to be fair."
i feel my hands get out of control. "earlier, you said i always say a different insult about myself. what if you're just going through different parallel universes and those are all just different - but real - versions of myself? what if you're not in a time loop, you're in a fucking universe loop?"
"if it helps, i've wondered this too. also, you're hot in all of them. if that helps."
i point at you. "no flirting. i'm trying to figure out if i die today."
"who's flirting?" you catch my wild hands and give me that long, perfect smile. like we're in this together. "i won't let ya die." you check your watch and sigh again. "well. maybe not this time."
i grit my teeth. you are so not making quips at me while i try to explain the existential dread i'm having. "does the time loop reset if i fucking kill you?"
"honestly i don't know how long it continues after i die, because i just wake up. it could be that the loop goes until the explosion for everyone, and we're all in the loop, or it could be that when i die, the loop restarts. when i die i wake up, is all."
i pull away from you and stalk into the kitchen and start doing all 3 of my dishes. "okay, first, you know i was joking. and secondly, this is exactly my point. you don't know if this is just a parallel universe. maybe in the ones where you died, the explosion happened and nobody reset and it's just you travelling." i have to stop and push my heel into my eyeball. "... how often have you died?"
i look at you. you look at me. you give me this very sad, halfway smile and a little what can ya do shrug. something in that action seems so old and weary that i want to burst into tears.
"i have to go," you say. "really. for real. there's this family of five i save from getting into a car crash. and i know it's like oh but we're all gonna die in the explosion anyway, what's the point. and..." you shrug again. "it matters to me, is all. at least i saved them for now. at least i saved anything."
you pad over to me and wrap me in a tight hug. you always seem so tall against me. i feel your cheek rest against the top of my head for a moment. for a second, it's just us, and the space is warm, and my heart is a little broken hare.
you leave me there, and i stand in my stupid badly lit kitchen with my stupid mugs. i think about you. i start texting my mom that she needs to get out of the city, but it feels pointless.
i don't know what to do. tomorrow is the same day for you. but i have to prepare to die in my today.
#warm up#prose#i just realized that there's a horror film in there about being someone NOT in a loop.#if i wanted to make it longer i'd have them come back like SUPER battered and hellish.#on round like 999#like halfway through lunch like - YOU . I LOVE U . IM SORRY . I RUINED IT BC I LOVE U CANT U SEE THAT#but like. yeah man what happens when someone else in control of ur destiny#what happens to all the versions of u that DO die...#i also wanted a pre-redemption time looper - this person#(who in my brain is they/them)#is absolutelyyyyyy toying with the narrator bc the time looper is caught up in like#an emo angsty '' i can't have what i want bc i ruin things'' self harm spiral#and like literally the way out of that spiral is to TRY bud.#but this is a person pre-redemption. still kind of an ass. still not really listening to her#still a little bit ignoring that they kissed someone 3 days ago#still KNOWS she likes them and DOES like her back. but is just too chickenshit still.#we're talkin that person we've ALL dated that's like ''i can't be with u anymore bc i am Too Broken and I Can't Stand Hurting U"#... i imagine they grow up tho. eventually.
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spare thought for the enslaved shepherds in greek mythology/tragedy who rescue the exposed doom babies... sometimes they know why the baby was left to die, sometimes they don't. they just — it's a baby. no one else wants it. you can't leave it here. what harm could it do. it's a baby. you want it to live. it's a baby
#spent a little too much time with my baby nieces this week perhaps. idk#i was thinking about agelaos but also the shepherd who jocasta gave baby oedipus to#who did know the parent-killing prophecy! and passed the baby onto another shepherd! and both of them recognize him as a grown man and#ahhh. everyone is so cruel to them but for a moment they're just happy to see him#hurts me. hurts my feelings.#anna.txt#slavery tw /#agelaos#paris#phorbas#oedipus
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[images ID: three images of a comic titled "one must imagine sisyphus happy" by druid-for-hire. it is a visual narrative beginning with someone with wrist pain (depicted by bright orange nerves) working at a drafting table. the reader is shown the same wrist as the person uses it for many everyday tasks such as carrying a grocery basket, pushing elevator buttons, typing, and doing dishes, until the pain dissolves all the panels into chaos. the person then performs several physical therapy exercises until the pain subsides. they sit back down at a desk with their laptop, sigh, and begin typing. a small spark of pain reappears. end id]
a fun little piece i made during the semester and submitted into our school comic anthology! (which you can buy at the Static Fish table at MoCCAFest in NYC ;] ). it's about artists and injury
#comic art#comics#original comic#chronic pain#carpal tunnel#tendonitis#my art#original#edit: what a delightful surprise to see this take off#this was made for class on very low fuel and very few thoughts and late at night and exhausted#the prompt was just a wordless narrative essay. three pages. and i had nothing and no ideas#and my head hurt and i was too tired to think about doing any of the like. research and mind mapping and ideating i'd do otherwise#but my arm hurt#so i decided to do a thing about arm hurty#i'm surprised to see so many people finding it resonating with them#but then again i shouldn't be. the universal lies in the specific#i should make more things about smaller stuff
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How helpy tested out the FNAF pizza sim attractions
#myart#chloesimagination#comic#fnaf#five nights at freddy's#micheal afton#helpy#fnaf pizzeria simulator#pizza sim#fnaf fanart#Helpy found dead in hurricane Utah#I THINK about this pizza sim mini game way too often#like Michael and Helpy were testing out these attractions#so thinking of Michael tossing his dear baby boy#and missing the target is so 💀#Helpy is okay! Michael is just a dramatic parent due to trauma#Michael really should of been cheap with his purchases though BAHA#Helpy is just Michael’s lil guy he doesn’t want to hurt them 💜
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brighter days ahead
#my art#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#jjk fanart#jjk art#jujutsu kaisen fanart#yuji itadori#megumi fushiguro#jjk spoilers#jjk leaks#nobara kugisaki#jjk manga spoilers#jjk 268#im sobbing about them its 1am and my hand hurts#but ive got more in me i havent been this happy n hopeful in so LONG#HES BACK#THEYRE ALL BACK#we might b okay guys it might all b ok .... :'>>>>>#im ignoring the minor salt abt all of yuuji's scars being Gone#like im happy he has both eyes n all that#but what can i say id gotten a bit attached to the new look :<<<#n my yuuji injury list is out th window hgdfghjkgd everything ive drawn is now inACCURATE CRIES#i predicted megumi having a scar on th Other side....yuuji now has his depth perception back........sighs#shoko is too good at her job gdi#all of this is /lh btw the loss of scars is small price to pay !!!!!megumi is BACK and SMILING and they all r gna b ok i believe :')#home stretch we r in endgame they can make it this is OUR jujutsu kaisen first year believers
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Scary Sunset.
I'm concepting things way outta order in this story, but I'm sure you can piece things together. Context is for a storybeat where, after defeating and capturing Adagio (thus having all three sirens in her possession), Sunset enacts her revenge plot to release the sirens on Canterlot as Thea discovers she's been manipulated. In a confrontation, the two scuffle and fight over the siren orbs while Sunset struggles with her conflicting wants and emotions.
#mlp#sunset shimmer#twilight sparkle#twiset#the orbs are the glass balls sunset carries on her back btw its in her cast line up art#deep down sunset hates thea. she was named “twilight” by celestia. the time of day succeeding sunset. she was always her replacement#but at this point in the story sunset's also fallen for thea. so it's also a conflict of wills in sunset. love or hatred.#hence the “don't make me do this” language. she's rationalizing her hatred and violence as thea forcing her hand and getting in her way#when in reality she doesn't need to do any of this. it's her last stand and outburst to cling to a life of revenge that she's grown too#fond of. because she knows thea has the power to change that and disrupt her identity as a pathetic victim who fell from glory#and that's scary. thea's a very scary thing to sunset because suddenly sunset wants something and to be someone new.#she suddenly wants to change. to be better for someone else. and she never thought or believed that could be an option for her#anyways toxic yuri yayyy#my art#the grand galloping 20s#character design#i hope i got across the pained conflicted emotions in sunset's face tho i belabored over them these past 3 days#i hope a look of anger and dissonance and guilt and “oh god i don't really wanna hurt you please just obey me” while trying to intimidate#is readable. if so it's all in the eyebrows babey
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wondered when exactly Damian started casually chatting with his hallucinations of Alfred in Robin (2021)
figured isolating himself in a dark tower carrying pictures of Alfred and the weight of his death would do the trick! (Detective Comics (2016) #1032)
#damian wayne#alfred pennyworth#batbabyart#'not-great-dad Bruce' rant ahead but. Bruce aware of Damian's guilt and allowing it to fester for so long still boggles my mind lol#there's a couple headscratchers i can think of but the worst instance had to be the Pennyworth RIP comic#Damian confessing his regret and leaving in tears while Bruce SAT there going 'he knows there's no blame :l'#when Jason already loudly blamed Damian lol!! and Bruce silently blamed Damian too!!#(ofc lots of internalized hurt and blame with grief but still)#ANYWAY the Alfred and Damian photos from that tec issue were so cute so this was partially an excuse to redraw them haha#this used to be Damian's og outfit+vest combo but it looked too silly to me sdgf
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"Shhh Link... I'm right here. We're home. It's okay... "
♥ Hurt & Comfort time ♥
Post-Totk Link is still plagued with nightmares of the Light Dragon, Gloom Hands, Phantom Ganon...Puppet Zelda...loneliness.
He wakes up at night screaming, hyperventilating, sobbing. But Zelda is there and she comforts him with love, kindness and patience! Like Link did for her Post-Botw.
It's gonna take time...but Link is gonna be fine ♥ Zelda too.
They are all gonna be fine and live happily ever after!!!
And Hateno domestic fluff resumes.
Gotta love when Zelda comforts her knight
#my art#zelink#legend of zelda#zelda fanart#tears of the kingdom#breath of the wild#loz fanart#zelda#botw#princess zelda#botw link#hurt/comfort#totk link#link needs a hug#hateno house#hateno village#he loves her so much#the power of love#Link is so freakin PTSD#Zelda has trauma too but without invaliding it#I think Link is waaaaay more of a mess than her#Link took care of Zelda Post-BoTW#Zelda takes care of Link post TotK#I have a crush on both of them#sheik fangirl#its her tunic now
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Good morning, Sleepyhead.
[First] Prev <–-> Next
#poorly drawn mdzs#mdzs#wei wuxian#lan wangji#'WWX was asleep for 4 days' is an incorrect factoid.#The average WWX sleeps for 8 hours. The PD-MDZS WWX who was asleep for 40 comics and 4 months is an outlier.#We are back to present day! I have missed drawing them!#Ah...the contrast between how the flashback ended (cold and distrustful) to how wwx wakes up (warm and watched over)...#The gap between the past and present is very important. Not just in this story but in our lives too.#The past can still hurt and it doesn't just go away with time as some say. It is the power of realizing that things have changed.#We can't get the good back. The bad memories have concluded. Those live somewhere else now.#It is hard to realize that you have to live for today and tomorrow. The past is so loud.#For WWX it is realizing that despite the mistrust in the past - He really does have faith that LWJ will be there for him.#It is the reflection of knowing that you changed and will keep changing and that change is good and kind sometimes.#But more importantly...and this I really do mean with all my heart:#It will all end up okay in the end. Even after the worst day. The most painful losses. You will get through it.#What feels like a breaking point is truthfully just another step you have to take. You'll get through it even though it feels like the end.#There are wonderful things you have yet to see. Friends you have yet to meet.#Even if it hurts so badly...one day it just aches. Someday you'll go a few weeks not remembering that it ever hurt.#Oh and because my izutsumi comic revealed many people were in need of hearing this:#You are loved. Right now. You are so loved right now. We just forget to tell each other that.#Go tell the people you love that they matter to you. I'm assigning you homework!!! You are graded on completion.
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More
#my art#sketchy sketch#gotham#nygmobblepot#oswald cobblepot#edward nygma#jerome jumpscared us with a love rival ao3 hurt/no comfort episode and then left#why did they go through all the hoops to make sure ed and oz didn't become too gay I will never know#I do know#but still#I will ignore most of it and act like knew what he had and did not let it go#“please we're brothers” YEA OKAY UHH OKAY#anyway....its so late I should not write tags#I feel insane for drawing them so much but it's my hyperfixation ok!!??
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Shaak Ti and her tiny charges join the Hades AU, complete, with colourful little highlights and a dialogue box this time (and an alternate version under the cut where I tried my hand at taking the shade/Force-ghost aspect a little further than I did with Fives)
"There is no doubt that Grogu is an exceptional youngling, but I cannot take him on as a Padawan no matter how much I may wish that I could. My duty is to look after the clones as they grow and learn - we cannot just abandon them once their war is over. As a Mandalorian you must understand this. However, I would gladlyassist in your quest in any other way I can."
Linear timeline who? Rex can have a mighty white beard and then look spry and blond simultaneously, there is teenager Omega and Boba sitting on his throne on Tatooine, so just don't worry about it XD Have three of my clone OCs as baby cadets and enjoy how cute they are instead.
#my art#hades au#shaak ti#sw fanart#star wars fanart#tcw fanart#clone troopers#clone ocs#clone cadets#the clone wars fanart#look I have clone ocs too! XD I'd thought I'd never see the day but here we are#I just noticed that poor Ray has a lot bigger forehead than Slider or Goldie lol#as if he didn't have it hard enough being permanently the shortest one XD#I'm not completely sold on the shade look but i had to try#I could have pushed a lot more but I was already hurting for erasing so much of them TT^TT#I am so so happy with how Shaak Ti came out!!!#I had a bit of a crisis with the colours but they turned out so nice in the end!#even if tumblr drained a bit of my reds again#Her lekku especially god they look so nice imo! similar but still different from Ahsoka's which was the goal#I wanted to draw her montrals taller but... I really needed to fit her on the page and next to that text box with some details showing okay
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Well, yeah, it's just where your bar for success is
I kept the arm
#uh K I don't think you can hurt-comfort your way out of this one#misfits and magic#misfits and magic 2#mismag 2#misfits and magic 2 spoilers#mismag 2 spoilers#sam black#sam britain#evan kelmp#yesss yessssss mangle himmmm#I think his arm exploded either like this or like those anatomy models#where the layers of skin and fat and muscle can be removed to show bone and then the bone shatters too#tw blood#tw dismemberment#art#I figured out how to edit the brushes in procreate so I can actually do lineart with them :D#procreate doesn't have built-in screentones like csp but you can import an image and then layer mask it
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i just wanted to draw the ave mujica outfits .
#project sekai#pjsk#prsk#proseka#tsukasa tenma#nene kusanagi#nenekasa#<- i like them.#sorry i like mygo + avemuji but cant make fanart of anything im not Fucking Crazy about normally#had to touch it up digitally because i tried coloring a Pen Drawing in with Watercolor. in earnest.#Everything think the announcements gonna be a new unit. I think that would be hilarious and the worst possible timing#Given where everyone else's arcs are but the miku design looked cute so if its jsut a new game that would cheese me#My tag blabbering... what else ... im artfight slacking. my wrist hurts. course selection is next week. SCREAMS#please pray to God i do not have any 8am classes. PLEASE. my college commute takes over an hour. If i have to wake up at 6am i will k#Oh my God i have to go to the dentist tomorrow too please fucking helpme THEYRE GONAN FIDN AMILLION CAVITIES AND KILL ME. AAAAAHG.#Every time theres another proseka broadcast announced i get scared cause i have so many song covers i want in the game but.#I want to draw them first. So that if they Do get added to the game i cna go HEH... >:)....#Thats whyi did skeleton orchestra emnn and scissorhands rks. I want scissorhands in the game reallybad i love that song#3DMV EVEN PLEEEASE but also nothing can too miumes choreography from like a decade ago i wanna do a cosplay performanc eof it someday...#i ❤️ waacking.#actually the one i Really want to draw is ALSO nenekasa. record red save me. ILL DRAW IT OK
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she says he won't let her get a dog, which is fine, because they're in an apartment, and that's the kind of thing people say about their partners. he won't let me get a dog. and you're at a dinner party and you tilt your head a little to the side just like that dog he won't let her get, because is this the thing that's going to upset you? you don't know every corner of their relationship, she could be joking, they could have had so many healthy conversations about the dog, right, and maybe she's not letting herself get the dog because of money and time and whatever. but, like, she did say let
and she wants to move away from his hometown and he wants to stay and then he tells you with a wink and a conspiratorial stage whisper don't worry i'll convince her and she laughs about it - so clearly this is something they laugh about. but you do just stand there and stare at him like what the fuck, man. you can't say what you want to say which is why do you get the final say on everything because they're both obviously aware of the other person's stance on this and have obviously had private conversations about it and what are you going to do about it except make a scene and then he'll be mad at you and call you one of those bitches behind your back and she'll cut you off, which is a loss that doesn't feel worth it just because he makes you a little skeeved out every 3rd comment
and they both agree he just isn't the type to get flowers which is fine because everyone shows love differently, and are you really gonna judge someone based on their sense of individual relationship responsibility? maybe he's constantly cleaning her car and writing her poems and making her furniture or something. maybe she doesn't even like flowers and this is perfect, actually. and no you couldn't date him, obviously, ew; but like, she tells you she's happy. you almost send her a tiktok that says don't be 25 and the cool girl that doesn't need anything, you'll hate not getting flowers at 30, but that's like, starting drama & you shouldn't start drama needlessly.
and you're a little older than her but not so much older you can pull the whole trust me on this one babe thing and besides that wouldn't have worked anyway (when does it ever) and besides you have trauma so you and your therapist both agree that you're always looking for a problem even when there isn't one. and you tell yourself that just because you see them for 15 minutes every month does not mean you can identify every single red flag based on a single shitty half-joking(?) comment
and besides, what are you going to do? she says i actually wanted another stand mixer but thankfully he stops me when i'm about to spend too much money and you're standing there like are you okay? is this normal? is this just something people say? and again - what are you going to do?
to your therapist you try to language it - it's not, like, any of my business. but sometimes, doesn't it feel like - you should do something. there's got to be something, right? you've tried dropping little hints but they sail right through and you've tried having a single serious conversation and she got upset because why does it matter to you, yes it's different but we're happy, it doesn't need to make sense to you and you're like. really unwilling to push a boundary about it anymore; because the truth is that you know logically it shouldn't matter to you, as long as both parties are happy.
and besides, you've been wrong before. it's just... like, every time you see them both, something else happens, some kind of shiver down your spine like do you even hear each other when you talk. it's their strange, bickering orbit. just the way he's on his phone through dinner or watching sports instead of helping in the kitchen or, fuck, another one of these little throwaway comments he makes about we'll see about that, babe. she laughs when he calls her passions stupid shit and meanwhile she gets him tickets to see the knicks and he tells you well at least she's smart about something and still! it's none of your business.
you say get the dog anyway and she laughs. like, this is is you being funny. and not you saying - no really. get the dog. get the dog and get out of here. pack up and start running.
#this btw is not including toxic friendships this is legit just something ive experienced MANY times now#writeblr#you ever have a friend in one of those relationships where ur like#u don't HATE their partner explicitly#but ur like. what the fuck y'all#like the weird part of being an adult is that you can't be like . CERTAIN their relationship is toxic#and also if u move too fast or push too hard u can hurt someone who is already in a scary situation so you just are like#frozen there. laughing awkwardly. saying ''haha..... yeah..... couldn't be me....''#and like u can't tell - is this banter or does he actually think like. he's better than her.#all you can do is be there for your friend and hope they wake up to it#or ... that it really IS good#and it's just odd to you#tbh btw id rather have my friends feel safe coming to me if they have a concern about my relationship#like yes it's not ur business but it also IS bc im making u hang out with them and also ur my friend#it's a weird thing to experience as an adult bc it is such a blurry line and when u spend time#around couples that aren't like ACTUALLY ur friends but instead ''extended friend circle'' ur like#.... i don't know y'all well enough and he just called you a cow. and ur okay with that . and i don't know how to respond.#so ur like :) okay. um. go to couple's counselling i think#but also you are NOT supposed to pass judgement so it's like.... this weird limbo of feeling like you SHOULD say something#but knowing you CANNOT#idk that there's a way to resolve it!!!!!!!! it's probably a different approach person to person#edited my tags bc tumblr's new system fucked em up#PS EDIT: btw i should have said:#the pronouns in this can work in any and every direction. every gender and every sexuality and every#type of relationship tbh. even non-romantic relationships where ur like ''what do u mean ur bff calls u stupid''
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