#i hope my interpretation of her makes sense

[archive-of-wax]

I don't even know where to start with my love for this post, I've literally been rereading it over and over all day. This is by far the best interpretation of Trudy's parenting I've ever seen. It really captures the complex family dynamic we see onscreen with the twins, both with their mother and each other.

It's easy to focus on Trudy's evident abuse of Bo in the opening scene, but I think this is the first time I've seen anyone really analyse her interaction with Vincent. It's also one of the few times I've seen anyone speculate about his perspective or thoughts regarding his mother and her parenting, and I think you're spot on. Vincent wasn't showered with unconditional love while Bo got constant abuse. He was smothered with overbearing attentiveness that probably caused more issues than it fixed. Helicopter parenting certainly lines up with many traits fans have inferred from Vincent's portrayal, such as perfectionism, overdependence, and an anxious disposition.

I also felt that his perception of their mother wasn't as idolised as Bo's, and would go as far as to say that during his and Bo's kitchen convo I felt a hint of...exhasperation? Even weariness. At Trudy, at Bo's idolised view of her that he seemingly can't reject out loud, maybe even the purpose of their murderplot. I always imagined his feelings towards her to be something like 'I love you but please stop I'm begging you, why are you like this, why can't you be better for us', and I feel like part of that frustration came from knowing that none of the hovering and fussing was ever really for him as much as it was for her to feel better about herself, so any conversation about his feelings on the matter would have been pointless. If not immediately dismissed it would have just caused an argument, and this family has enough of those already, right? No need to rock the boat.

I have also never seen that newspaper clipping about Victor?! Could I ask where you found it? It completely throws loads of backstory theories out the window. Your version makes the lead-up to the murderplot make so much sense too. Bo and Vincent didn't just wake up one day and choose violence for no reason, but rather the pressure slowly built up: their father passing, the mill shutting down and all the jobs disappearing, then the town's inhabitants leaving, and lastly their mother's death. I imagine they found themselves alone in their now dead hometown, feeling washed up, lacking the practical and social skills to set off on their own (Vincent in particular), grieving the most pivotal person in their lives, and fit to burst with rage at the world. With their minds already cracked from their upbringing, and nothing to lose, it's easy to imagine how one thing led to another...Maybe some lost jackass gets a little too cocky with Bo at his mechanic shop, a fight ensues, Bo doesn't quite pull his punches like he knows he should and accidentally kills him. And then all it takes is a 'Yes, I know this is bad, Vince, but listen. You know how you've been having trouble sculpting like mama used to...?'

Anyway yes all this is to say this was a fantastic read! Thank you for sharing your thoughts, hope you don't mind me going on a mad ramble on your post haha. (Also could I ask you to link that study of a similar conjoined case? I've been looking for a real life counterpart to the twins' condition and could not find one for the life of me!)

Trudy refills Vincent’s cereal. He’s 2-3 years old and blind in one eye. He doesn’t need more cereal, he just needs his bowl rotated so he can see the cereal that was left over on his blind side. Not that we necessarily know how Vincent communicates without speech, but she hardly gives him time to answer her question about more before she’s refilling the bowl anyways. This is her approach to parenting her boys in general.

There’s no interest in fixing their actual issues. Rather than help Vincent to see what he already has in front of him, she’d rather add more, inadvertently also adding more onto the side he can’t see. At some point, this would just add to the issue. Overcompensation into overwhelm. Bo is brought in for breakfast kicking and screaming and it’s sort of evident why Trudy puts all her love into Vincent to the point of it being suffocating and unhelpful. Sure it could be a simple case of favoritism, but with the aspect of overcompensation specifically, it seems that she wants to balance her guilt over failing to parent one of her sons by pouring more effort than necessary into Vincent. Rather than giving the extra attention to Bo, it’s refilling a non-empty bowl of cereal.

I don’t think that necessarily mean she loves Vincent more. She finds him easier to parent. Fill the bowl whether or not he needs it because that’s easier than unpacking where Bo’s massive emotional outbursts are coming from. It seems more like love-bombing than genuine kindness. He’s “being such a good boy today,” but the implied part is an unsaid comparison to Bo. As twins, and conjoined twins at that, they’re not independent of each other. Vincent’s behavior exists only to contrast Bo’s, from her perspective. “Fix” his needs, and she can fix them both. Hence, preferring just to duct tape Bo to a chair than help him any.

Then Vincent grows up to become her protege, starting in his childhood but lasting until even after Trudy’s death. Over thirty years have passed since they were toddlers in those high chairs, but Bo gives a hint about why Vince got that ‘special privilege’ to not be as physically abused. “She always said that your talent would make up for what God took away from you.” Only, God didn’t take anything. Victor Sinclair doing illegal, unqualified surgery on his babies is why Vincent lost half of his face. Trudy only uses God’s name and religion as a shield for her own guilt about how her boys turned out. But it’s more likely she included Vincent in the wax business because she again, was dumping affection onto him over and over as her strategy.

Otherwise there isn’t as much favoritism between the boys. In their childhood photos, they both play piano, both play pool and baseball, both get to sit at the table with their birthday cake (without highchairs or bindings) and they play on the floor together. It's not entirely divisive between them, though it’s still obvious from which brother she’s slapping across his face and which brother she’s love-bombing which she’d prefer to deal with. Just not which she actually cares for more. Vincent wasn’t somehow spared from abuse in a house like the Sinclair household.

Interestingly, when Bo tells the story of Trudy and Victor, he mentions that once the Doc died, they were alone. Except, there’s at least one version of a prop newspaper stating that Trudy created a wax memorial for Victor. So this is just a false version of events most likely. Sure it could be that a decision changed, but there’s also the fact that, in the guns and ammo store, there’s a sign that says “Trudy’s Town or Wax.” And Bo tells Vincent, “We almost finished what mama started.” She’s also much older than the Trudy we see in the family photos and articles (even with the amount of cigarettes that woman smoked.) Ambrose is confirmed to have been abandoned for a decade, but to be turned into wax, Trudy would’ve had to die sometime between the abandonment of Ambrose and the present. Else she would’ve been properly buried most likely. The plan to fill Ambrose was hers, it’s just Bo that suggests using real humans (according to his apology to Vincent, he takes credit for the idea anyhow.)

Which makes her boys at least in their mid twenties when she died. In an older version of the script, Bo had killed her and Victor, but knowing it would put them all in foster care, that doesn’t quite make sense unless they were older. So the order of events is, Doc dying, the sugar mill closing, Trudy planning to reimagine Ambrose, and then dying herself.

The reason that’s important is because it’s emblematic of just how much pressure she was putting on both of her boys. And that’s not love. With two mentally ill, abused sons, (maybe three, since Lord only knows how they treated Lester once he came along,) that’s just manipulation. Victor and Trudy aren’t cartoon super villains for being bad to their boys. But when you can’t even just rotate a bowl slightly for your half blind little one, it’s shallow. Trudy has her cigarettes right in the boys faces in the opening and in most of the photos. Smoking was in one study linked to about 1/3rd of conjoined pregnancies, and in a similar case of conjoinment to the boys, one of the twins had lost an eye and had a prosthetic, but with minimal scarring because of the surgery being done in an actual legal hospital. It’s not about God taking anything, or about which is a little monsted and which is a very good boy- it’s about Trudy and Victor both messing up from the very beginning and causing the boys losses, then refusing to take accountability for it. Or, in the symbolic sense, to just do the right thing and turn a damn bowl of cheerios towards your blind kid.

[sockatoothewafflebird]

this is the third installment of my series of posts analyzing the arcane s2 intro!!! go to the tag "arcane intro analysis" for the previous posts. remember, SPOILERS FOR ACT 1!!!

okay. let's get into it. again.

it's time for the beat drop!!! and hoooh boy.

one thing i really love about s2's intro is that it plays with the lighting in a very specific and very meaningful way. with ekko you can see his shadows are like the hands of a clock which alludes to his time ability; with jinx and vi in the beginning the light highlights parts of their faces to emphasize how the season will change them; the list goes on.

with this part, jinx has four shadows. in a literal interpretation of this, it means she's splitting apart. it means she's losing which parts of herself are powder and which parts are jinx, and which ones are something else entirely.

or maybe, alternatively, she finally realizes the different parts of herself and accepts them, kind of finding herself in a way. waving the flag of revolution, with hope in her eyes. the strip of light flies across her determined face and i LOVE that detail. especially the way the orange and blue lights combat, but compliment, each other.

OKAY ONTO THE VI AND CAIT SCENE OH MY GOODNESS🔥🔥🔥

this is the best screenshot i've ever taken. anyway

at first it's just vi, and it focuses on her face, probably to emphasize the smudged tattoo, reminding us of her loss of identity.

but then it focuses on vi and cait. and cait is shrouded in darkness save for just a couple of frames (it was hell trying to pause at the right time to catch it).

i think this means that vi will begin to see her as a ghost, as nothing more than a silhouette. caitvi divorce arc is gonna go so damn hard.

at first i saw the kiss-then-push-away bit as them butting heads, but then i realized that it makes more sense for them to repel each other, like oil and water. oh, the misery...

but then i was thinking about it. and i realized, it can be both.

with cait becoming a dictator, vi and her will probably indirectly do things that contradict the other, or thwart the other's efforts. they will be butting heads in arc 2, maybe even arc 3. or maybe i'm wrong about that, but i doubt it.

moooving on- we've all talked about this screenshot!

caitlyn's shadow becoming the silhouette of a monarch, her fingers seeming to have blood on them. her being in clear distress, going utterly mad because of the weight of the crown on her head. been there, done that. genius use of lights and shadows in my opinion.

and, oh, before i finish off this installment, let me just point out how much of a punch-to-the-gut the parallel here is. (or, rather, the butt of a gun to the gut. yeah i'm sorry)

in s1 caitlyn was everything she wanted to be. now? she's afraid, angry, confused, stressed to high hell. a dictator, an enforcer of the system she wanted to change. she's everything she swore to destroy, for lack of a better phrase.

once again image limit is forcing me to continue this series of posts. and even if i could add another image, the pacing of this analysis would get really weird. there should only be one more, so stay tuned! once again the tag for the other parts is "arcane intro analysis". happy reading if you made it this far!

[ennn]

Great meta about episode 8 and about Agatha’s feelings. I’m particularly curious about Rio and I agree with everything you said about her feelings and why she lashed out. She finally gave up on Agatha after centuries, she accepted she would always hate her no matter what even if she chose giving Billy up or herself but did that kiss change anything for her? She looked like she was truly grieving her and letting go

I don’t think she knew about ghost Agatha but will that change anything? Do you think she will follow the deal and leave Agatha alone? There is also the issue about Tommy but if you don’t count the twins do you think Death finally decided to move on? Will she be free or with those two, never 😂

Heh, I did leave out the part about the kiss in my meta post didn't I? My brain was so tired lol

The short answer? It's ambiguous.

And I think that's largely deliberate because The Powers That Be (TPTB) haven't committed to where and how they want to use Rio / Death in future Marvel projects.

I think there's definitely enough setup done and opportunity in the story for Rio to come back for an AAA sequel or spin-off — but also enough ambiguity if not.

Story-wise, the kiss is significant because I don't think Agatha's one to directly apologise or walk back what she says. It's a similar thing in episode 4 where Agatha embraces Rio with all that emotion.

I think the kiss is Agatha saying she still does have love for Rio, that she does want her despite all that she said earlier, that she's sorry but she can't let this boy die.

It's very heartbreaking if you consider Rio had resigned herself to Agatha just hating and rejecting her, and she is given this reminder of their love as a goodbye.

But ultimately I think with Agatha's progress – inching her way along her arc – this still marks the end of this chapter of their relationship: these two finally had something of an honest conversation, the baseline of their interactions has changed, and Rio needs to process brand new emotions like grief (which I sure hope doesn't have cosmic consequences ha ha).

That said, the kiss does seem to put Agatha and Rio in a relatively okay place at the end of this chapter. It's a bit of reconciliation. They've shown that they still love each other, but there's still a significant disconnect between them. But as a wise Lilia once said, sad is better than angry.

Now the ghost thing: it's a really interesting change to the dynamic of their relationship but I don't know if Agatha being a ghost encourages or dissuades Rio to go after her. Rio may feel motivated to help Agatha pass on and be with Nicky. Or Rio may take it as Agatha choosing to put distance between them, and from what we see in episode 5, Rio can't really do much about ghosts.

What the ghost thing does do is give Rio some grounds to ignore the first deal because if we look at the letter of the arrangement, Agatha asks for Rio "to stop making her life hell" and to not see Rio's face when she dies. These terms are no longer relevant for a ghost.

And if one argues that the deal has Agatha telling Rio to stop pursuing her, you could argue that Rio's following Billy and trying to deal with the Tommy situation. Agatha just happens to be around all the time while Rio's doing her job.

If we ignore the whole Maximoff twin situation like you say, I think it would actually be up to Agatha to decide whether a new chapter of them begins.

Because while being a ghost is a sacrifice in a lot of ways, it actually gives Agatha more control over the relationship in a way she didn't before, not even with the Darkhold. I don't think Rio can touch her, literally. It's possible Rio can't even sense her.

The good news is, this kind of ambiguity is perfect for fanfiction and fan interpretations. There is a lot of potential there.

[tickly-trashcan]

Transformers: One Tickle Headcanons!

A/N: look away LOOK AWAY im still obsessed with these silly little robots and i cannot get them out of my head so i wrote this while avoiding my other responsibilities LOL i hope the few transformers fans on my blog enjoy and if you're not a transformers fan read anyway and join the fandom i promise its so fun!!! (ps i might do headcanons for the other continuities as i watch more... tfp fans unite)

Orion Pax

this stupid little guy i love him to bits

he is really ticklish and he is so silly about it

hes such a switch like. he doesnt mind being tickled at all i bet he probs loves the attention LOL but he LOVES tickling other bots like d-16 hehe

he's veeery tickly under his arms ESPECIALLY if you get the seams that connect his arm to his torso that will make him scream. get him there

hes ticklish in most of the normal cybertronian tickle spots as well (dont ask me what those are. they are up to interpretation!) but i think hes also got a pretty sensitive chassis (tummy...) and if you get the little seams that go across his chassis he will be GONEE

hes got a really loud laugh i think... one of those rapid fire squealy laughs yup yup

he squeaks! and gasps! and makes other funny noises! but only if you catch him off guard otherwise he's just laughing lol

he will put up a fight if someone tickles him!!! he will go down kicking and actually has a good shot at turning the tables LOL

d-16 has had those tables turned on him so fast but he never learns! poor dee

like i said before hes pretty chill about getting tickled but he thinks hes literally The tickler of all time

hes very confident about his ler skills bc d-16 is so ticklish its actually not fair but if you put him up against elita he would fold so fast

wiggles his digits at d-16 every fucking chance he gets somebody stop his ass before he kills dee

i think he and d-16 tickle each other a lot without it escalating to a tickle fight or full-on murder (orion is the murderer.)

like they poke each other! all the time!

they're good about not doing it on shift (most of the time... side eyes orion again) but as soon as they clock out its a free for all

orion is pretty teasy but not overly so if that makes sense? hes more taunty than teasy HAHA like he'll say to d-16 "lol why do i keep forgetting how ticklish you are" and dee is screaming

he does not tickle elita. ever. she scares him.

also he tried to tickle her once and she wrecked his ass so bad he could hardly stand up. d-16 never let him hear the end of it either

d-16 will still randomly bring it up like "hey pax remember when you tried to tickle elita haha that was so- AUGH!!" and then orion jumps him

D-16

DEE MY BELOVED GAAAAH

he is ridiculously ticklish because i said so. I don't make the rules. also im right d-16 is the biggest lee on this list

hes also a switch but hes so ticklish its hard to get away with tickling other bots like orion because one poke and the tables are turned!! orion is nice to him sometimes tho and lets him get in a few tickles mwahaha

im pushing my d-16 hip agenda. are yall seeing a pattern with me giving my favs ticklish hips ITS BECAUSE HIS HIPS ARE RIGHT THERE!!! anyways. d-16 has the most grabbable and tickleable hips and his hips should be grabbed and tickled until he screams

hes also tickly on his thighs! and his chassis (more tummy!!)

d-16 is one of those people who will try to keep his laugh in but he literally lasts two seconds before hes giggling. two seconds is actually a generous estimate tbh!

his LAUGH i feel it in my bones hes got massive giggles and its kind of high pitched and hes so embarrassed but its adorable and im so upset about it

like once hes laughing its a much deeper laugh but initially since hes trying to keep himself from laughing he just giggles frantically and its so cute bc its so pitchy

HE SNORTS

he snorts and he hates it but it is literally The best thing in the world and orion loves to tickle him until he snorts

for a week after orion learned what the word "speedrun" meant he tried different speedrun challenges with d-16 (how fast can i make him mention megatronus prime, etc.) and one of the days was "how fast can i make d-16 snort"

the answer is 1 minute and 34 seconds in earth time i aint doing the cybertronian equivalent. google is right there.

when he tickles other bots its crazy tho he can be MEANNN if he gets the chance

like he will taunt worse than orion and hes also a really good tickler methinks.. knows how and when to be more rough and when to be more gentle so he can really drive someone up the wall

once he got orion pinned face down and just. shoved his servos under orion's arms. had him screaming and begging but tbh orion probs deserved it!

d-16 has never tried to tickle elita and does not plan to. he will make fun of orion's attempt but he knows better

i think d-16 was also the first one of the gang to give bee a little tickle!!! got him giggling and actually got him to stop yapping a lil bit hehe but it was fun for everyone

B-127

I will tolerate absolutely ZERO bee slander alright if you beef with him you beef with me get off my blog

bee is almost as ticklish as d-16 but had absolutely no idea until he met orion, d-16, and elita. zero clue.

he knew what tickling was! he had tried to tickle himself before after seeing some bots in a tickle fight but hes never been tickled until d-16 poked at him a bit and he jumped 10 feet in the air

d-16 is really nice about tickling bee.... gives him soft tickles bc he knows hes not used to it and tickles him just enough to get him giggling IM SO UPSET

orion is also pretty nice about it but hes too teasy and bee gets embarrassed (also hes learning abt teases from orion. more on that later!)

i think he's really tickly on his chassis!!! most tickly spot for him definitely... all over too not just tummy part but his sides and hes also got tickly knees! watch out tho bc this dude kicks LOL

he has one of those cackly laughs but also has really sweet giggles and he DEF squeaks i dont make the rules

hes pretty shy about tickling others at first but because hes just not used to being around other bots!! hes been told before that hes too much so hes worried that tickling other bots is going to cause other bots to shut him down... BUT HE LEARNS ITS OK TO BE SILLY!!!

he sees orion tickling d-16 and starts yapping about how hes never been tickled and d-16 and orion tickle him a bit and its really sweet but he does NOT know how to react

"WHY AM I LAUGHING WHAT" "we're tickling you bee thats what happens" "OH THATS AWESOME HAHA IT FEELS FUNNY"

bee definitely likes being tickled but he also loves tickling the other bots... id say more lee in general but will tickle when he feels like its okay to!

hes normally yapping about something completely unrelated when hes tickling someone which is really funny but he learned from orion (BAD INFLUENCE!!!) how to tease people

so! now when he tickles other bots he does the really evil teasy stuff... it hasnt come back to bite orion yet but d-16 is suffering!

Elita-1

ahem... women... women women I LOVE ELITA

okay i think shes pretty tickly but not nearly as much as the rest of them... she can take a few pokes and barely smile but also can you even get a few pokes in before shes wrecking ur ass? not really!

shes 90% ler and 10% lee and yes i would definitely piss her off so she would tickle me who said that not me. i love women.

shes tickly on her knees and under her arms!! good luck getting her tho she is very squirmy if you manage to get her and even then she will fight BACK

she has a really bright and bubbly laugh if she gets got really good and it is so lovely and GAAAAH

she doesnt actually tickle other bots that often its mostly if people piss her off or try to tickle her that she goes after them mwahaha

which is why orion is such a frequent victim of her attacks

she is also one of those people who is either silent when shes tickling someone or is the MEANEST teaser on planet earth and bots like orion have experienced both and he cannot decide which option is worse

she has tickled d-16 and bee before but not nearly as bad as orion... he pisses her off so bad LOL i love their dynamic

shes actually so sweet with bee compared to d-16 and orion like okay elita we get it you have a favorite (hes my fav too i totally understand)

i want to talk more about her as a lee tho bc i feel like... she actually wouldnt mind being tickled that much its mostly reflex and its also cuz she feels like shes gotta be tough and being soft kinda goes against that orz

she keeps this mostly to herself but she does occasionally let bee tickle her more than she would let another bot because she knows hes just a Guy and is too busy yapping about other stuff while he tickles her to be like "wait why are you letting me tickle you rn"

her soft spot for bee... makes me so ill...

she also shows clear favoritism for bee when shes tickling him the teases are so much sillier and shes not as evil in general. for orion pax it is on sight

[secretarysong]

so much Mayday stuff (& a smidgeon of Vinyl City worldbuilding) in my head. ooouugghh. wrote this at 12am last night and i'm not the best at articulating my thoughts so forgive me as this wooonnt be the most polished. this is likee a mini conglomeration of personal headcanons and a bit of analysis (reading too far into things) ... i just wanna talk about her REEEAALLL BAAADDDD

i've always thought of Mayday as someone so deeply intertwined with Vinyl City (specifically the working-class & lower-class areas; the 'little guys') that her dream of becoming a big famous rockstar also stems from a desire for agency/power. power to be able to do SOMETHING in the name of her communities after personally living through, like, 2 decades of neglect—condemned by NSR to live in the shadow of the more tourist-oriented/commercial/profitable parts of the city—even if it means rising to charterhood under the same stupid record label that's the source of all her problems in the first place ...

i also like to believe this, in tandem with her rumbustious nature, is why Mayday IMMEDIATELY switches to aggression (dare i call it a TV meltdown...?) following her & Zuke's flames being so harshly snuffed out during the Lights Up Audition.

Mayday was probably warned beforehand by the adults around her about the EDM bias. i think she ignored/dismissed every warning/dissuasion because she believed in herself and her ability and her principles too unshakably for her own good. and then for the judges (particularly Tatiana) to unanimously strike her dream down like that, thus proving their warnings right & her hard work (and ignorance) in vain... FURY!!!! (Mayday is NOT the best at taking losses with grace)

and then the banning of Rock from the Lights Up Audition happens. and then the subsequent blackout and diversion of energy happens. and seeing the extent of what happens across the city with her own eyes from atop the ledge (after being limited to her own ground-level experiences on the outside, looking inward) is what finally tips her over the edge and into the vat of a full-blown revolution.

semi-related, but i also view Mayday's hatred towards EDM as. like. a general prejudice. it goes a bit deeper than just Not liking the sound/style; she associates it with NSR, and therefore links it with everything wrong with Vinyl City. rock music, a dying art in the era being upheld by her tightly-knit community, untouched by NSR, to her is authenticity.

she also loathes the "Order leads to progress in Vinyl City." slogan because, to her, order means complacency... and complacency has done shit all for anyone she knows. ("If chaos is what is needed to get things done around here, so be it!")

i know i'm kind of bouncing back to the second paragraph but. like. there's just something so dear to me about the idea of a Mayday whose a roving city girl from off the streets... armed with her guitar, her passion, and her support system, doing everything she can to prevent rock—her home—from becoming irrelevant. always chasing a fantasy about being something bigger than herself. even if the odds are stacked against her. even if Mayday's own impetuosity is a double-edged sword that impedes her just as much as it enables her.

to me she's. like. a melting pot of ambition and stubbornness and righteousness and naievite. Mayday girl i love you SOOOOOO SOOOOOOOOO MUCH ideally i would put this all into a legitimate form of writing like a backstory fic or something but gah i don't even know where to START

[thebramblewood]

This book might as well be called So Your Deadbeat Vampire Dad Abandoned You: What Now?

Previous / Next

Helena, thinking: Well, if it’s just going to sit there, I might as well read the thing…

Introduction: Vampirism is no easy existence and will certainly not be long endured by the weak-willed, faint of heart, or squeamish. Fledglings who lack the knowledge or means to satisfy their all-consuming thirst and guard against their newfound weaknesses are far less likely to survive the initial stages of transformation, in which the craving for blood threatens to override all capacity for self-control. If they find themselves lucky enough to be under the tutelage of an intelligent and attentive sire, young vampires can not only mature but thrive for many centuries in their strange new forms. However, the presence of such a devoted mentor is not always guaranteed. Therefore, this book aims to serve as an instructional guide to attending to one’s needs and harnessing one’s abilities for those newly turned vampires who find themselves without a teacher.

Helena, thinking: Hmm, it's almost a little bit too on the nose.

Chapter 1: Dark Form Mastery

Helena, thinking: God, I feel ridiculous. Did it even work? It’d be nice if I could see my reflection right now.

Chapter 2: Bat Manifestation and Flight

Helena, thinking: Here goes nothing, I guess.

OW! OOF!

That’s going to take some practice.

[welcometogrouchland]

Hello, another doodle compilation post of everything I haven't posted since the period of May to now that I didn't hate but didn't like enough to post on its own + fanart i made of @catboymoments's fankids Azura and Hyacinth! I'm not normally a fankid person but these guys are a whole moment unto themselves I love them sm. ID in alt text bc it was getting lengthy! Let me know if there's any issues

[moodmoodthecrabking]

sapphic alice woodward moodboard requested by anon

[sailforvalinor]

Idk if this is controversial, but studying for a English/writing degree at university shouldn’t make you NOT want to engage with writing or literature. Just a thought.

[caeslxys]

"I’ve seen a lot of people say that the Hells will side with the gods and I don’t think I agree. Especially as Imogen has been scolded and villainized over and over for daring to try and save her mother—who herself has been seen by some as an irredeemable evil in spite of her drive being the exact same—her family—but when it’s the Gods it’s justified? When it’s the Gods, it’s sympathetic? Too sympathetic to criticize further than “they’re family”?"

good meta op, but i'm slightly confused about this part. are you talking of the fandom here or the narrative? because from what i've seen and remember, imogen has definitely been scolded or villanized as you say, by the fandom, but has she been treated that way by the hells or anyone else? i guess keyleth comes to mind, but apart from that, the hells seemed supportive of her wanting to reach out and reconcile with her mom.

Prefacing what i'm sure will be an overly long mostly tangent: you obviously do not have to agree with my interpretations of any scene I'm about to bring up and if you don't sick cool please do not make it a problem

A bit of both, to be honest! The use of the word “villainizing” was definitely more geared toward fandom response, but Imogen has absolutely been scolded—or maybe shamed is the better word—in campaign several times! Yes by Keyleth threatening her in front of them all just for being ruidusborn and related to Liliana, but also by Orym in particular several times.

Which is not to say that Orym doesn’t want Imogen to save her mother—obviously he does!—but it has definitely been more than once that he has shut down her grief and her processing her relationship with her mother by inserting his own grief over it, notably in the immediate aftermath of Ruidus and convo with Liliana.

(Which, yes, he immediately apologized for, but I do find it interesting that Imogen got shit from fandom for her response in the scene I'm about to bring up in episode 49 for EVER but no one was allowed to criticize Orym's response as impulsive and insensitive there and he notably was not disassociating or being actively manipulated. Just think it's interesting!)

And while it wasn’t nearly so livid in it’s delivery, that moment in 49 where she was just trying to process seeing her mother and speaking with her and being presented with the idea of peace for the first time in her life was delivered (though you could argue this wasn’t his intent; honestly I don’t think it was, but—) in a way that immediately had her plummeting into self-deprecating apologies for being effectively manipulated. I’ve actually written a bit before about how I find the youth of his grief making it more volatile in comparison to the rest of the hells’ grief deeply compelling as a thematic beat!

That’s a bit of a tangent just bc I find specifically the dynamic between Orym/Imogen/Liliana to be a very compelling one lmao but even in the Uthodurn arc with Chetney insight checking her to see if she was telling the truth or not about her intentions with her mother. Or Fearne bringing up to Orym (also back in 49) the question of what they planned to do with/to her if she turned. It's not that I think, necessarily, that those were ill intentioned but they were coming from a place of, at best, mistrust specifically because of her connection to Liliana. Really only Ashton and Laudna—and FCG, funnily enough—have not in some way taken her grief and yearning and turned against her when it comes to placing their trust in her (whether she was aware they did so or not), which of course speaks to a certain interpretation they had of her character at the time.

And, also, this has obviously since changed and most of them mostly understand where she’s coming from now—especially Orym!—but it doesn’t make the fact that it happened any less true!

[the-eclectic-wonderer]

For the character asks, Blanche. Questions 8, 10 & 12 😊

hiii friend!! thank you for the questions!! <3

8. What's something the fandom does when it comes to this character that you despise?

Oh wow. This is a dangerous question, haha!

‘Despise' is a pretty strong word. I feel like the one thing I really can't stand is character assassination (although this is true for every character I like, to be honest). I'm not the authority on what makes Blanche Blanche, of course, but I have seen a few instances when it felt like people only saw the superficial parts of her and forgot about everything else, you know what I mean? Thankfully that's pretty rare around these parts though :)

There's one thing that's more specifically Blanche-related that's a pet-peeve of mine, and it’s the accent thing. I don't really like it when accents are explicitly written down in fanfic, and since Blanche is the one with the strongest accent in the cast, this happens to her sometimes. I just want to point out that this is not wrong per se, it's just a me thing! I prefer to 'hear’ the accent in my mind while I read — if I have to stop and parse the meaning of a sentence mid-action, it's harder for me to fully immerse myself in the story. I don't mind the occasional truncation of a 'g' at the end of a verb, or the odd 'y'all' in a phrase, but if every sentence is written like that it does get a bit hard for me 😅 once again though, this is just my personal preference, and I definitely don't despise the practice.

10. Could you be best friends with this character?

I'm actually not sure how to answer this! If we didn't know each other at all, I think we'd need to be in a situation where we have to spend some time together in order to become friends (like, idk, working together or something like that). We don't share lots of interests (appreciation for art aside), and her passion for men would definitely throw me off at the beginning, so I'd need a reason to spend time with her to get to know her! But we are more similar than we seem, so once I did get to know her better, I'd love to be her friend :) we'd probably drive each other crazy on some things, but I need someone to get me out of my comfort zone at times, and she'd probably benefit from having a more 'grounded' friend, in the same way she benefits from having Dorothy as a friend.

... of course, this is all assuming that she'd want to be my friend in the first place, which is not a given 😂 I'm probably not interesting or fun enough to convince her to give me a chance, but a gal can dream, you know?

12. What's a headcanon you have for this character?

Just one? :')

I've said it before on here, but I headcanon that she's a cover hog. It just makes sense to me! And, still related to sleep, I feel like this is basically canon, but she's a night owl. She's more active during the night, she sleeps in, and it takes her a while to wake up in the mornings.

She actually is knowledgeable about art -- but not necessarily about artists! I think she likely doesn't have a lot of formal education about art (and especially art history), and even if she did study anything related to it she doesn't strike me as an exceptional student overall, but she has a natural instinct for visual beauty -- she's great at things like recognizing which paintings were made with similar techniques or within the same artistic current, distinguishing the traits and characteristics of painters, identifying specific shades of colour, this kind of stuff. Show her a painting and she'll correctly tell you that it's a Van Gogh, how he painted it, the precise shades of colour he chose and why he chose them -- but she also doesn't know that he cut off his ear, you know?

She was a bit of a reckless driver, especially in her youth -- the kind who likes to hit the gas just a tad too much, who plays the music just a tad too loud. She likes acting larger than life, she likes having fun, and she likes attention, so this feels appropriate for her. I figure it probably wasn't noticeable because she rarely drove herself (she always had a gentleman at her side to drive her around), but she never really grew out of that particular trait -- until George's death. After that, I think any imprudence behind the wheel would evoke his accident in her mind, so by the time the Girls met her she had turned into a very conscientious driver.

Thank you, these were so much fun to answer!! I love love love talking about Blanche <3

[CHARA CTER ASK GAME!!! 💫]

[bedforddanes75]

desperately need tiktok ethel cain fans to know how stupid they are

[stagehunt]

more thoughts on aven and topaz and why i don't really interpret them as having the close relationship that i see a lot of in the fandom + his general feelings about her. talking about the checking out quest a little in the beginning.

screenshots from my own transcript but they're still word for word. aven is more than aware that the tb is never going to accept a job offer from the ipc and treats this entire exchange as the joke that is, and an excuse to get under topaz' skin a little. just for fun. interesting then, how topaz immediately starts to get very personal during this little debate — while simultaneously displaying how well she actually knows aven, which is honestly not at all. i wouldn't blame this on a lack of understanding on her part, but on the way aven keeps everyone at arms distance, a distinct lack of trust in her from aven, and radically different outlooks on their work and life.

both of the dialogue excerpts kind of highlight that but i want to focus on the second one here because it immediately reminded me of a personal headcanon when i was playing the quest through.

so. i'd already made the assumption that aven didn't have many staff working under him — both because of his treatment within the ipc / the varying reactions to who he is and his history with the previous aventurine which is pretty much public knowledge, his preference for working solo, and his habits of putting himself in harms way and taking very unreasonable risks. he'd assume that topaz sees these " work habits " she mentions as the main reason that people don't work to him but he also knows that she isn't foolish enough to think that's the only reason anyway. which is why he then immediately reminds her that diamond doesn't particularly care WHAT he does so long as he secures the bag at the end of the day.

it's for things like this, and her general hostility towards him ( which does seem to vary, but her voice line about him is very harsh as opposed to what she tells us about him when she knows he's around / how she acts to his face ) and with the sheer amount of manipulation she's under, the things she genuinely believes about the ipc and her job there, he does personally think that it's impossible for her not to have absorbed at least some of the ipc's common opinions on him, the avgin + avgin extinction event / ipc's involvement on sigonia, and the egyhazo - aventurine case, and allowed them to colour her impression of him before really getting to know him.

however as i mentioned in those disc screenshots, aven is obviously aware of the predatory nature of the ipc. he's been working there for almost a decade now, he was a teenager when he first wound up there, and he understands what happened on topaz' planet very well. he understands that she's naive. he understands that she has been essentially groomed, as well as the fact that she's very dedicated to her work. but he also understands that she's a kind hearted person, and that she does try to do what she thinks is the right thing in most situations. it would be ridiculous for me to say that he doesn't sympathise with topaz, even if he does find her a little obnoxious and annoying to be around.

so while he doesn't necessarily feel enough responsibility towards her to put up with her apparent dislike for him, he does subtly keep an eye out for her. when she first became a stoneheart he figured that she should be able to understand his situation better than anyone and that it would make sense for them both to have each others backs as much as possible. but from what he's observed and how they interact with each other, he just cannot convince himself that it would be safe to trust her. he knows he'd have to be careful with his words around her, and that at least currently, she wouldn't ever choose him over the job. still, he has a feeling that if she were ever to open her eyes to what she is complicit in, she'd despise the truth and herself as much as he does, if not more for being so easily strung along by the likes of jade.

so are they friends? no. but if topaz ever genuinely needed help he would be there. he would understand.

[upsidedowngrass]

i adore your liam so much!!! 🫶 im curious though how you explain the changes for ep 15+/why the waiting room didn't heal his scars? are they just Too Bad or....

thank you!!!!

the way i interpret the waiting room i think mainly revolves around the fact that when an injury heals irl, the scar IS because it healed!! i draw the one characters w them bc the waiting room is def able to heal injuries as shown in ep, but i dont imagine that would make it so that there arent scars if that makes sense?? that said, i ALSO hc any injuries healed in the waiting room to still be treated like any injury would act if it would had they been healed, such as muscles still having issues that exist after something has healed, or nerves being damaged no longer being able to send signals as they would before!!

basically, i think of it as the injury being fully healed in a realistic sense!! that the aftereffects of something healing would still exist, but any active damage is restored and treated as if the body continued onward!!!

[steveyockey]

To be aware you might be trans but unwilling to do anything about it is to create endlessly bigger boxes within which to contain yourself. When you are a child, that box might encompass only yourself and your parents. By the time you are a gainfully employed adult, that box will contain multitudes, and the thought of disrupting it will grow ever more unthinkable. So you cease to think of yourself as a person on some level; you think not of what you want but what everybody expects from you. You do your best not to make waves, and you apologize, if only implicitly, for existing. You stop being real and start being a construct, and eventually, you decide the construct is just who you are, and you swaddle yourself up in it, and maybe you die there. There is still time until there isn’t.

This reading of TV Glow’s deliberately anticlimactic, noncathartic ending cuts against the transition narrative you typically see in movies and TV, in which a trans person self-accepts, transitions, and lives a happier life. Owen gets trapped in a space where he knows what he must do to live an authentic life but simply refuses to take those steps because, well, burying yourself alive is a terrifying thing to do. The transition narrative posits a trans existence as, effectively, a binary switch between “man” and “woman” that gets flipped one way or another, but to make our lives so binary is to miss how trans existences possess an inherent liminality.

Humans’ lives unfold in a constant state of becoming until death, but trans people are uniquely keyed in to what this means thanks to the simple fact of our identities. You can get lost in that liminality, too, forever trapped in a midnight realm of your own making, stuck between what you believe is true (I am a nice man with a good family and a good job, and I love my life) and what you know, deep in your most terrified heart of hearts, is real (I am a girl suffocating in a box).

And yet if you want to read the film as being about the dangerous allure of nostalgia, you’re not wrong. I Saw the TV Glow totally supports that interpretation, too! But in tempting you with that reading, the film creates a trap for cis viewers that will be all too familiar to trans viewers. Somewhere in the middle of Maddy’s story about The Pink Opaque being real, you will make a choice between “This kid has lost it!” and “No. Go with her, Owen,” and in asking you to make that choice, TV Glow is simulating the act of self-accepting a trans identity.

See, the grimmer read of the film’s ending truly is a nihilistic one. It leaves no hope, no potential for growth, no exit. Yet you must actively choose to read that ending as nihilistic. If you are cis and the end of I Saw the TV Glow left you with a gnawing sense of dissatisfaction, a weird but hard-to-pin-down feeling that something had broken, and a melancholy bordering on horror — congratulations, this movie gave you contact-high gender dysphoria.

In an infinite number of possible universes, there is at least one where I am still living “as a man,” embracing my fictionality, avoiding looking at how much more raw and real I feel when I “pretend” to be a woman. I think about that guy sometimes. I hope he’s okay.

Consider, then, my cis reader, that TV Glow is for both you and me, but it is maybe most of all for him. I hope he sees it. I hope he breaks down crying in the bathroom afterward. I hope he, after so many years locked inside himself, hears the promise of more life through the hiss of TV static.

Emily St. James, “I Saw the TV Glow’s Ending Is Full of Hope, If You Want It to Be,” Vulture. June 4, 2024.

[milsirils]

I hope I’m not making mindless sleep deprived connections when I say this, but I just noticed that Milsiril tends to wear bigger and longer clothing around her children. Which gave me the thought oh she probably wears them to hide her scars from her children..but I also suck at forming words so y’all are just gonna have to trust me on this one.

What really caught my attention was these two arts of her wearing two really baggy looking pieces of clothing. In both of these situations she’s with her young children.

Please bear with meee here cuz I know in most of her panels she's in the canary uniform, so we only get to see her in her non work clothes once. In this one extra, her scars visible and she is wearing a short dress, but what I want to highlight is that she is with only elves here.

Here is more of her wearing clothing that covers some of her arms! I like to note that in all instances she’s with Kabru..

(Even in the first panel she is wearing those arm bracelets that cover up most of her skin in a way. She doesn't always wear them but they're an interesting addition imo.)

BUT This is what sells me a little is this scene from this chapter. Where Milsiril is playing the soft and protective Mother role, feeding Kabru cake, almost kinda baby talking him. She’s using her shawl (?) to cover her arms. Til Kabru brings up the dungeon and wanting to be “strong like her” is when her shawl slowly begins to fall off her shoulders each panel and reveals some nasty scars.

Taking at look at the "Strong like you." panel (middle image, first panel in the middle row) it particularly peeks my interest because I’m so sure Kui did that on purpose. Not to mention when the tone shifts completely and we see Milsiril looking rather scary. This time her scars are on full display.

So going off of the last few panels, I’m going to personally assume she tries to cover them around her children so they don't have any feelings of uneasiness or fear around her. In the instance with Kabru, it’s almost like she's trying to install some fear in him whether that’s to drive him away from the dungeon or just show him what exploring in the dungeon is really like. Whatever is the real reason to all of this is beyond me.

I hope this makes sense and y’all can pick up what i’m tryna put down. I’m so tired feel free to reblog with your own interpretations or additions pls. or if i missed anything thanks.