#i hope i haunt your memories
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âi donât need youâ yet i beg for a sliver of your attention in the corners of my mind, i crawl through the echoes of my loneliness, hoping, dreaming, dying to see you, all i find are rusty mirrors and shattered windows, funny how broken glass looks shiny from a distance, i just wanted you to see me, all you wanted was a reflection of yourself,,
// i still dream about you
#reflection#loneliness#yearning#longing#angelâs poetry#my poetry#poetry#emotions#feelings#thoughts#words#spilled ink#poems and poetry#spilled poetry#neglect#i still dream about you#i hope i haunt your memories
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Like i know what happened with felassan cause i know the end to masked empire
But will veilguard actually tell us about the end of masked empire? Like proper, not just in vague lines shouted during mini boss battle
#dragon age the veilguard#playing dragon age veilguard#like i enjoyed the screaming during the boss battle alluding to the scene#but like if i did not know the plot of masked empire#the entire build up of getting solas m#memories via felassan pov and then ending up fightning a mini boss#is very confusing???#like is the game gonna actually in codex or words tell that you know#why felassan keeps haunting the narrativr#i love him haunting the narrative but like????#imagne playing dragon age the veilguard as your first dragon age game#the felassan would be so confusing???#i have not finished the game yet#still hoping their is.... at least a codex entry somewhere#or solas tell us#or SOMETHING
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âkindâ is debatable but iâll never fail to insert him in every conversation
#kamen rider geats#ukiyo ace#silly thoughts#he doesnt even haunt the narrative because he specifically set it up that way â ď¸#and only haunts tsumuriâs memories in the end#what a shitty younger brother (lol)#i love you ace#you are the narrative#and this might be your burden to carry#but i hope you get some rest
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To feel at peace
#about me#Ive been happier than Iâve ever felt in my life#recently#I havenât felt this type of deep rooted happiness since I was a young child#I feel wonder again#I feel warmth#I feel excitement about my future#a future that for a long time I knew I would never see#and now itâs here and Iâm so beyond grateful that I held on#my sorrows still haunt me but now in a way that feels like a memory#personal#if you read this I love you and I hope you also hold on for your better days#because I used to think it was bullshit when people would tell me it gets better#because I used to think to myself what if it doesnât ever get better#and I never knew that I could grow into myself the way I have#I never thought it would be possible to be this happy to my core#and yetâŚâŚ here I am#I see you#I love you#I hope you hold on
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trying to convince yourself the teenager who passed the family picnic celebrating your grandparents birthday wasnt actually doing the hitler salute but instead a super similar and totally unrelated hand gesture: just jewish things!
#no one else noticed#so i am not going to bring it up#and ruin their time or memories#but i am absolutely furious and inconsolable rn#how dare you. giggly little idiots who think theyre sooooo funny#well my grandparents are still here and so is their legacy so i guess do the salute. we won motherfucker. my children did not fear you and#no one even noticed your empty and baseless hatred#i hope you sleep well. i hope this haunts your dreams when you are old enough to understand it. i hope your palm itches every time it faces#open air. i hope your children are proud if you someday. and are disappointed when they learn this about you.
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rediscovering bands i listened to over 10 yrs ago
they still slap
#i mean#âare you at all haunted by memories past - are you ready to make this one breath your last - is your chest so heavy you're ready to leave -#- or are you just hoping that someone will grieveâ#i think this line single handedly kept me on this earth when i was 17/18 yrs old#the amity affliction my beloved
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god im still ridinf that high of sheer euphoria, lifes good
#fuck being the bigger person ill make sure you never ever forget me#you will live haunted by me for the rest of your life#every time you cut remember me. you always liked to tell me whwn you cut. i hope the memory lingers#this is still not a vent this is my ultimate w#i can start putting those 4 years behind me. i found solace that i will keep him up at night for the rest of his life#i hope he never feels safe knowing im in every little corner#i could easily go after him now but i wont <3 im so nice <3 i just had an epiphany#â˘txt#tw sh
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Mother, oh mother how I miss you.
The discipline you taught your dear daughter still resides. It keeps her safe and well behaved.
The caution you bestowed in her thoughts and actions has prevented quite a lot of a trouble.
Mom? Where are you? Mom? I need you.
Your daughter carries your sadness with her, did you know? She cherishes it.
All that loyalty you had shown a man who didn't deserve it has instead manifested into one girl. She promises to keep you with her to the end, like you promised her.
Ma, I hope you're happy, I love you.
Your siblings see your daughter as a sister with how alike you two are. They called you her sister by accident so much it's funny! She lightens rooms, she fills them with joy the way you used to.
I don't remember much as a child, but what I do was always with you.
Do you remember the whales mom? The water? Can you still smell the chlorine and squint at the thought of the lights?
Everyone says my mommy has a wonderful voice, I know it's true too.
Unfortunately your daughter was shot down before she could be a songbird.
Instead she uses the blood that blooms from her chest to draw.
Yet... Slowly she's finding a tune now.
Maybe one day sudden noises won't silence her anymore.
#my idiocy#written memories#this is oldish but technically most recent#its both tbh#ive only known 1 type of love everything else was fleeting or silly wasnt it#im sorry mom im sorry i hope this guilt stops haunting me for your special day next month
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Tag drop ft. general
i. ( ooc ) : backstreet's back alright
i. ( psa ) : memory is another name for ghosts &. their awful hunger
i. ( crack ) : fey's guide to troubled bird
i. ( meme ) : death : brilliant ; clever ; cruel
i. ( open ) : something tender anyway ; but tender like a bruise
i. ( ask ) : things the birds tell me
i. ( wish ) : burning like a sun in your mortal heart
i. ( edit ) : what happens to anything beautiful
i. ( give ) : death inspires me like a dog inspires a rabbit
i. ( promo ) : if the moon smiled she would resemble you
i. ( interaction call ) : forgive a girl for being lonely
i. ( saved ) : hope is the thing with feathers that perches in the soul
i. ( sp ) : we create ghosts ; we haunt ourselves
i. ( q ) : &. i am out with the lanterns looking for myself
i. ( dash comm ) : it is night inside you so crawl towards the light
#i. ( ooc ) : backstreet's back alright#i. ( psa ) : memory is another name for ghosts &. their awful hunger#i. ( crack ) : fey's guide to troubled bird#i. ( meme ) : death : brilliant ; clever ; cruel#i. ( open ) : something tender anyway ; but tender like a bruise#i. ( ask ) : things the birds tell me#i. ( wish ) : burning like a sun in your mortal heart#i. ( edit ) : what happens to anything beautiful#i. ( give ) : death inspires me like a dog inspires a rabbit#i. ( promo ) : if the moon smiled she would resemble you#i. ( interaction call ) : forgive a girl for being lonely#i. ( saved ) : hope is the thing with feathers that perches in the soul#i. ( sp ) : we create ghosts ; we haunt ourselves#i. ( q ) : &. i am out with the lanterns looking for myself#i. ( dash comm ) : it is night inside you so crawl towards the light
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Nothing can truly show you the reality of what's happening in Gaza, not a picture, not a video, and not even words. The truth is far worse than anything an image can capture. Families are not just enduring genocide, theyâre being erased. Their history, their homes, their existence, wiped away like they were never there.
Whatâs left behind? Bits and pieces. Fragments. A scrap of fabric here, a shattered memory there. People are still trapped beneath the rubble. Some are alive, their voices weak but desperate, pleading for help that will never come. Thereâs no rescue equipment. No teams to save them. And anyone brave enough to try is met with drones, striking down anyone who gets close.
Those whoâve managed to survive arenât just hungry, theyâre freezing. Imagine huddling in a makeshift tent, shaking not just from fear but from the biting cold that seeps into your bones. The wind tears through everything, ripping apart whatever tiny bit of warmth youâve managed to cling to. Inside the tent, thereâs no comfort. Only the sound of bodies rustling as they try to stay warm, muffled cries of grief, and the haunting sound of people buried beneath the rubble, their faint cries for help echoing in the dark.
The cold doesnât care. It doesnât spare anyoneânot children, not parents, not the elderly. It sinks into everyone, leaving them numb, both physically and emotionally. Hunger takes what little strength they have left, and the cold takes their hope. This isnât some tragic story from the pastâitâs happening right now. These are my people. This is my family.
A single line can hold the weight of an entire story, and a single choice can save a life. What if you skipped that extra coffee, brush pack, or subscription and put that money toward rescuing lives in Gaza ? One small sacrifice from you could provide food, warmth, or even survival to my family whoâve lost everything.
You might wonder, âDoes it really matter? Can I make a difference?â The answer is yes. Every dollar you give is a line of hope, a stand against the darkness. Donât let this story fade. Donât let Gaza disappear into silence.
Please help us and donate now if you can, and reblog this post to spread our story.
Vetted and shared by @90-ghost: Link.
Verified and shared by @el-shab-hussein: Link
Listed as number 282 in "The Vetted Gaza Evacuation Fundraiser Spreadsheet" compiled by @el-shab-hussein and @nabulsi : Link
Listed on the Butterfly Effect Project, number 957: Link
Additionally, Al Jazeera News has documented apart of my family's case: Link
If, for some reason, you couldn't donate via GoFundMe, you can donate via PayPal instead.
Donate on GoFundMe: Link
Donate on Paypal: Link
Please keep the conversion rates in mind when donating through GoFundMe. Every 250 SEK is equivalent to 25 dollars, and 506 SEK equals 50 dollars and so on. Note: Thereâs even a raffle for a handmade Palestinian thob if you want to participate : Link
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The Verdict Due
SIMON 'GHOST' RILEY x FEM!READER TASK FORCE 141 x FEM!READER
Traitors Among Us (Part 1)
Innocents Among You (Part 2)
The Guilty Plea (Part 3)
Clear Skies (Part 5)
Summary: You head to Laswell to talk on the rest of your now ruined military career. Of course, you're forced to confront your team as it happens, the last people on earth you'd like to see.
If you liked this would you Buy me a Coffee?
Simon's steps are slow, lacking energy or purpose. Releasing the buckles strapping his vest down to him, he finally arrives to his door, lifting the camo from himself.
His forehead pressing into the wooden door, he finds it harder and harder to open everyday, seeing reminders of you every moment of everyday, when he closes his eyes, when he lays down in bed. Hell when he opens the door. He hated this room now.
Outside of the place that you both had made your home away from war, from battle, from the base, this was where the two of you had once spent most of your time.
He raised his head off the door, before bringing it back down on it, then doing it again, this time hard enough to hurt. "Fuck," he cursed, cursing himself, his stupid decisions, the times he'd never get back, the mistakes he'll never be able to erase. Huffing out bitterly, squeezing his eyes shut, he's still for a moment, before banging his fist against the wall. "Fuck!" There's a crackle along the wall, a clatter of dust and dried paint hitting his feet.
A shuddered breath leaves him, swallowing down his grief, his anger at himself. But, he can't help it. He's ruined everything.
Simon's head stays there against the doorway, he doesn't want to go in.
His head turns a bit, seeing a figure down the hallway, straightening up, dark eyes squinting. "Johnny?"
Quiet and Still. The Scotsman's mouth is set in a hard line, he runs a hand down his face, smearing the mess he'd made of himself. "I..." he breathes deeply. "I saw her today."
"You what?" Simon perks up, eyes wide. He looks past his comrade, seeing the open doorway of your room, "She's here," he speaks, voice alight and hopeful. Making his way past Johnny, "She's here?" he asks this time, bracing himself at her doorway.
But, the room is a mess and void of you. He'd nearly forgotten how the soldiers had left it, the day it happened he could watch it, it would've been too finalizing of what he thought was your betrayal. Today was meant to be the day they'd clean it all up, due to plaguing themselves with missions and ops that required long weeks, long hours. No one wanted to think about what they'd done.
But, now they'd only made another mistake in waiting too long. And now you had to be greeted by this mess.
"I didn't know it was--" Johnny couldn't turn back to the room, back to Simon, as he spoke. "I didn't know we did so much to her. I thought--how long--how could I--" he shakily began. "--how could you?" Simon's eyes flicker to his friend, dark circles and sunken cheeks seem to worsen. "She was so...she couldn't even look at me, Si. Like I'd make her sick, like I'd--hurt her again...I've never--" his fingers claw at his chest, hoping to rip away the ache in his heart, eyes haunted to tears and staring into the dark of his memory as he thought back. "I'd never--" he can't finish.
"She was here?" Simon asked again.
Johnny's clouded eyes look to Simon, opening his mouth before opting for nodding. Clearing his throat, finally seeming to get a handle on himself, "Just left."
"She what?" Simon bolts out towards the stairs, pushing through the doorway and jumping down the first flight to rush through the rest.
As he gets to the lobby floor, he shoves through the door, revealing the hallway to him, running down the long stretch before ramming into the side wall to catch himself at the corner. He continues down the way, running as fast as he's able, before bursting through the side doors of the front lobby.
He sees you immediately, beyond the glass doorways.
"(Y/n)..."
He's running before he can think to get his legs moving.
---
Leaving the dormitories, finally leaving behind the spare hospital wear that you had swapped for your own clothes, you waved down the first vehicle you'd seen.
The driver letting you into the truck, the two of you unaware as he begins to drive off, Simon shoving his way through the residential doors and coming to a stop in the middle of the street as you drive away.
You, having hopped a ride with one of the soldiers making his rounds, the Jeep shakes with the changing terrain, providing more conversation than the trooper that was much too quiet. Shifting his shoulders, adjusting his fingers around the leather, glancing one too many times through the mirror.
It was getting weird. But, you were a familiar face on the base, unfortunately now, it used to be because you were good at your job, the best sniper they had on the force. But now, it was because you were the first proclaimed traitor of the force in decades and the first to be wrong about.
So, the new attention is nothing to be pleased about.
"Find something interesting to look at, soldier?"
Back straightening, body stiffening and eyes facing the road, the trooper swallows thickly at having been caught eyeing you. "No, ma'am!"
"Then I suggest you keep your eyes on the road."
"Yes, ma'am!" clearing his throat. "Sorry, ma'am, I don't mean to stare."
Arms crossed, head turned to watch the smaller buildings go by, your jaw clenched. "It's fine..." you breathe, before relaxing a bit more as the drive goes farther and farther away from the residential areas. Eyes flickering over to the still tense trooper, you mutter. "Ease."
His shoulders drop, head turning, flustered. "Sorry, ma'am."
It was always strange to be called 'Ma'am' by fellow soldiers, usually you were only a year or so apart, others you had been younger by ten years or older by five. But, this trooper was new to the force, young, clearly still jumpy, you had been the same after your first missions on the Task Force.
"I'm sorry, ma'am," the trooper then speaks, shakily.
"You don't have to keep--"
"About what happened to you," he continued. "I'm not sure if you heard that yet, but it's--that sounds--I can't imagine. I'm sorry that happened to you."
For a moment too long you're quiet, holding your breath, staring at the scenery as it whistled on past, the wind whipping through your hair. Your nails tearing into your skin as you rake them over your scars, smearing the line of blood left after ripping out your IV line, abandoning it as you found a ride.
"Get any cool scars out of it, at least?" he jokes, lightheartedly.
Your eyes snap his way, his eyes widening before he looks back to the road, back to stiff.
You open your mouth to speak, but you can't. You're just angry, too angry to find the words. But, you don't want to take it out on him, he was just attempting to alleviate whatever burden he imagined to be on your shoulders. But, all it was was a reminder, this was all anyone could think of anymore, when it came to you, this ordeal.
The apologies, the reminders, the quiet looks, the whispers, the fucking gnawing pain still splintered through your spine, you were tired of it.
The car pulls up to the largest administrative building on the base camp, hopefully you were right and this was where Laswell was posted up.
Quickly pulling the car handle as the trooper steps out of the vehicle to assist you, you hurriedly speak as he reaches to touch you. "I've got it," you hiss out, harsher then you meant. Stepping down and off the platform, onto the sidewalk, you forget you don't have your IV pole to at least stabilize you. So, when you stumble, he grabs your arm, his other resting on your shoulder.
"Woah!" his grip lacks gentleness, though not bruising, it's enough to set you off.
Your arm goes back and over his arm, shrugging him off, roughly. "I said I got it!" Your palm pushing into his shoulder and sending him back and off of you, he shifts back and nearly off his feet, catching himself.
"Alright, jeez!"
You're stumbling back into the light pole luckily a few steps behind you, leaning yourself against the cemented metal, you balance yourself. Shaking off the buzz in your ears and rubbing away the tension built along your skin, taking a few shuttered breaths, turned away from the soldier.
The trooper takes a few steps away from you, expression lifted to frustration and annoyance, rolling his eyes, brows furrowed and back pedaling to the Jeep. "Fucking crazy," he mutters to himself, adjusting his gear and stepping up back to the vehicle.
But, he doesn't make it very far until you're on him.
"What the fu--!"
Taking the opening of his kevlar and yanking him out of the vehicle, unable to catch himself fast enough to get to his feet. You hold a steel grip on the collar of his uniform, literally holding him up by his straps, pulling his entire bodyweight off the ground, leaning down so you're face to face with him. "Say it again," you snapped, eyes dark and boring into his skull. "I wanna have a good excuse for what I'm about to do to you."
He was taller, probably stronger, but looking up at you, he could see the years of mayhem and chaos that's burned itself into your irises, made you the lieutenant he'd tripped up on properly respecting. "I didn't--I didn't say anything! I'm sorry, ma'am, it won't--it won't happen again!"
Nostrils flared, eyes flickering between his wide, fearful ones, your hands loosen around his gear. He falls forwards, landing on his forearms with a groan, releasing a relieved breath.
He looks up, watching as you turn and make your trek into the building. You had seemed so fragile before, with a limp in your walk, scars head to toe and those braces along your legs, he assumed you had no fight in you. He couldn't have imagined, five minutes, he'd be wrong.
---
"Laswell."
The Station Chief turns, manila folder files in hand, brows raised at the intrusion before her eyes widen at the sight of your tired figure.
"Gray..."
You don't wait to be invited inside, instead pulling up a chair as you let the door close behind you. Not fully out of a lack of respect but your legs were killing you and surely if you wait a second longer you'll literally tear a muscle. "You free?"
"Never. But, I can make time," she answers. "Is something wrong?"
You bite down on your tongue. What isn't wrong.
"I put in a request for council in resignation, ma'am. I'm just here to know if it went through."
"I did...receive your request," The woman is still quite surprised to see you, a bit off put at your presence, hearing about your scars was one thing, seeing them was another. "Of course. Though, I expected you to wait for my call before deciding to come to me."
"I'm sure," you feigned a slight chuckle that faded as soon as it started. You say nothing else but stare.
Laswell sighs, tossing down the folder she'd been holding. "Look, Lieutenant Gray--"
"Just (L/N)," you gritted out. "Please." You couldn't stand your codename at the moment, you didn't want to carry a single thing this team had given you.
"Lieutenant..." Laswell pulled up a chair on the opposite side of the long table, facing you, "You've accomplished much on the force, saved lives, eliminated threats that had the potential to level the united nations, your honors and distinctions. At the very least, here, your guidance is a treasure..."
"I'd like my resignation to be approved, Chief--"
Laswell continues. "I need you to careful think about what you're doing here, Gray--(L/n). I don't want you to be motivated by what's happened to you, you still have a place on the force, it doesn't have to be beside your team. Don't waste your talents in the field because of this experience."
"Experience," You scoffed at the word, nose cringing up in disgust at the downplay. "I didn't go on a rollercoaster at Disney World, god--I was tortured by my team for weeks while my fiancĂŠ threatened to kill me afterwards..." you were about to lose your mind. "What makes any of you think I'd want to stay here? Why can't any of you just respect my decision to leave? I'm resigning."
Laswell settles back into her chair, lips pressing together, she makes a hum of a sound. "I can arrange a transfer," she compromised. "But, my authorization goes through only after informing Price, he also needs to sign off on this."
Your jaw clenches, your fingers tightening around your clasped hands. "Then how about that favor you owe me?"
Station Chief straightens, brow lifting and arms crossed. "Excuse me, soldier?"
Sighing, reaching a hand into your bag, you bring out a folder of your own, some documents signed off. "I had to wonder who the evidence was sent to, given it was right after our mission and Price doesn't even look at his reports to sign off on something in under 24 hours, it wasn't him," watching as Laswell opened the folder, revealing her own name signing off on the interrogation, just a few of the photos that'd declared you guilty. "Thanks for ruining my career, Laswell."
She spreads out the evidence, her own signature on the papers, she breathes out. "And what are you trying to do here, Gray?"
"Stop calling me that."
"Trying to threaten me with what exactly--?"
"Nothing," you answered. "I'm asking for a favor, from someone I thought was my friend," you find it harder to say, Laswell's jaw clicks and she shifts in her chair. "You owe me that much."
"It's the job, (L/n). I was protecting our own, our resources were very promising."
"Until they weren't, huh?" you sarcastically gritted out.
"Yes..." Laswell sighs. "I do apologize, (L/n), but--"
"Just do this for me," you interrupted, pleading this time. "Please. I can't go to him, I can't even look at Simon, let alone Price. Forget about being in the same room with them. I just--I can't be here, this isn't where I belong anymore," looking down at your hands, the scars that circled your wrists. This was a final decision. "I'm resigning with or without you."
Rising from your seat, Laswell stands as you do, "You resign without clearance, they'll take everything from you. Your pension, your insurance, retirement, everything, you'll be dishonorably discharged, you understand that?"
"'Course, I do," you admit. "Honestly, I thought I'd be dead on a mission somewhere before I saw any of that, I don't expect anything out of this. Nothing's...worth any of this."
As you turn the handle to leave, Laswell speaks once more. "I just wanted to enlighten you on what I'm risking for you, signing off on this."
At that, you glance back to her, watching as the older woman sighs heavily, picking up a pen, opening up the manila folder she'd been holding onto previously. Opening it up to reveal your resignation papers.
"If I do this, when I call on you, Gray," Laswell says. "I expect you to be there."
As she wrote her signature down on the dotted line, you swallowed down the ache that's plagued you for weeks, "I swear."
As the station chief continues down the packet, turning to the next page and signing once again, you slowly slide back into your chair, sitting silently as you watch her sign off on your leave from military service.
You bring your hand up fast as a tear runs down your face, wiping it away before Laswell can see, sniffing quietly.
---
Walking slowly down the side hallway of the admin building, you stare out into space, your eyes glistening as you hold the signed resignation packet to your chest, pressing it to yourself tightly.
Passing the front desk, the security posted up at the elevators, you enter the main hall and come to a stop. Your grip on your documents tightening as you watch rain pour out onto the outer glass of the windows.
Watching the downpour outside, you can't seem to get your feet moving to just leave this place. That's all you need to do, just...walk right through it, into a car, past the gates, onto the highway. Just...go home.
As you flinch at the pitter patter of the rain hitting the building, a short burst of thunder, you try to inch your way closer to the doors but the closer you get, the more you can remember. The more you can feel.
The rain gets louder, and louder. It's cold, although you recall it being 90 degrees and in the middle of the desert. It must just be you.
Putting your folder away and into your bag, the automatic doors open for you, but it's too hard to step through. Staring out into the open landscape, the dividing border of the desert land and the gates surrounding the base. The dry ground now turning muddy, trucks driving by and the mud swelling up at the change in pressure, soldiers rushing through the rain, kicking up mud, flicking up umbrellas.
Breathing deeply, you scuff your shoes forwards, feeling the first drop hit your skin, it's warm, but it's no comfort. Gasping at the feeling, you stumble back into the building, the automatic doors closing.
Short gasps of breath quietly leave you, your nails burrow into the skin of your forearm, you stare at the rain as it pelts at the ground, flooding pot holes and falling into storm drains.
The automatic door opens again, you back up, shifting to the side, as an officer gives you a strange look as he walks past and into the rain.
Your hesitance to proceed into the rain was noticed by a few in the main lobby. Like Kyle, who still stood in his mission uniform, dropping off his reports to the main desk, getting off the elevator to see you staring up at the cloudy sky.
His eyes widening in shock, he's lost in his own world when he begins to take steps towards you, lips parting in disbelief, voice cracking as he breathes out to say, to beg or plead for forgiveness.
The automatic door opens again as you shuffle forwards to try to step outside, he doesn't fully notice your fear of the weather when he speaks.
"(Y/n)..."
You turn at the sound of your name and his eyes flicker to the large scar along your cheek, the red of your eye still, that had changed the color of your iris, maybe permanently. The way you hold your bag tight in your hands as if to shield it from the rain before yourself.
You don't say anything, he hadn't expected you to. You stare at him, surprised to see him, then the expression changes to terror, brows pulling inward and hands sinking into your bag to bring it closer. His heart aching at your reaction to him, his lips pressing together, he doesn't know if she should say another thing. Just let you go.
"(Y/n), I..." he can't help himself as he continues, breathlessly.
You back away from him, out of the building and into the rain. The moment it hits your back, soaking through your shirt, rain hitting the top of your head, down your back, you tense up and spin around.
Kyle's brows furrow, before worriedly witnessing as you curl into yourself instantly, crying out in terror, your hands coming up and over your head. "(Y/n)!"
Realizing what you'd done, your back hits the glass doorway, too late for the doorway to register you wanting to come back inside. You stumble to the corner of the building, just next to the doorway and under the too small gutter to find any shelter from the pelting water at your skin.
A loud sob leaves you, squeezing your eyes shut, you can feel the torture starting again, the unbearable freeze of your limbs, the force of crashing pounds of water along your spine. The screams they would pull from you...
Your torment lasts only a few seconds, suddenly the rain stops, but the sound continues around you. A coat settling around your shoulders and over your head, Kyle's hands on your shoulders, he's yelling over the thunder. "Come on, let's get you out of this. Come on, (Y/n)," he takes your arms. "Let me help you, please!"
"You did this," you cried. "I told you. I told you it wasn't me. But, you kept turning it back on! And then you'd leave it like that and it drove me fucking insane. I'll never be ok again, I can't--" hyperventilating. "Don't touch me, Kyle."
Kyle swallows thickly, head hanging low, squeezing his eyes shut for a moment before leaning down to you. "I can't leave you here like this, please, love," he hauls you up to your feet. You shove him back, pressing yourself further into the corner, shaking, "(Y/n)--"
"Don't put your fucking hands on me. What don't you get, huh?" you spat. Pulling off the jacket he'd placed over you, tensing at ever drop of rain that fell over you after, but you toss it back at him. "I don't want anything from you. Never again."
"I'm sorry," Kyle clutches the jacket. "I'm so bloody sorry. I'm sorry for every damn thing I'd ever done to you. I'm sorry we didn't listen. I should've never done that to you. I didn't want to, I just--I thought I was doing the right thing for all of us," his voice breaks and he cries under the rain as his little sister, his family, hatefully stares him down. "I thought you'd give in, that it'd be over as quick as it started! I'm sorry I couldn't trust that you were telling the truth all that time."
"I don't want your apology!" you yell. "Cause you'll never know the same feeling. You'll never understand what you've taken from me. What you've done to me--" hiccupping painfully.
Kyle looks away from you, inhaling with a shudder, reddening eyes are covered as he raises his hands to run over his face.
"Your apologies. Your wishes for forgiveness," you seethe. " You should keep them. They mean nothing to me."
With that, you shove on past him, re-entering the building and rushing down the hallway, you turn the corner away from Kyle. Leaving the distraught man out in the rain, the automatic door sliding closed as he looks on after you.
Part 5 OUT NOW!
#call of duty x reader#simon riley x reader#simon riley angst x reader#ghost angst#cod x reader#call of duty#ghost x reader#cod angst#simon ghost riley x reader#simon ghost riley angst
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The Shards of Childhood
The city I knew, the one my children chased pigeons in and learned to ride bikes on, is gone. War, a cruel sculptor, has reshaped its once vibrant streets into a desolate landscape of twisted metal and shattered dreams.exclamation Buildings that held laughter and the scent of baking bread now stand as hollow shells, their windows vacant eyes staring back at a ravaged sky. Memories, too, lie fractured beneath the rubble. Gone are the echoes of children's games played in sun-dappled courtyards, replaced by the relentless thud of shelling. The familiar scent of jasmine, once a signature note in the summer air, is now tainted by the acrid tang of destruction. Each corner used to hold a story - the bakery where my daughter devoured warm croissants, the park bench where my son scraped his knee for the first time. Now, these fragments of our lives exist only in the fragile museum of my mind, a place where the war cannot reach, but still manages to cast a long shadow. Yet, amidst the wreckage, a flicker of hope remains. Like fragile wildflowers pushing through cracked concrete, the resilience of the human spirit endures. We, the survivors, carry the weight of this loss, but also the fierce love for our children and the yearning to rebuild. We will gather the shards of our memories, piece by broken piece, and weave them into a tapestry of a new future, one where laughter finds its voice again and our children can dream safe dreams, free from the haunting echoes of war
#free palestine#free gaza#gaza genocide#gaza#gaza mutual aid#gazaunderattack#save gaza#save people#important#from the river to the sea palestine will be free#help gaza children#please help#palestine#rafah#غز؊ ŘŞŘŘŞ اŮŮŘľŮ#ŮŮسءŮŮ#غز؊ تباد#Ů
؏زع؊ ŘąŮŘ#ŘąŮŘ ŘŞŘŘŞ اŮŮŘľŮ#ŘąŮŘ ŘŞŘ¨Ř§ŘŻ#غز؊#gaza under attack#gaza under genocide#Řعب غز؊#war news#news on gaza#war on gaza#send help#save children#suffering
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Help Us Survive This Winter: A Fatherâs Plea â¤ď¸âđŠš
My name is Mohammed, and I never imagined that one day I would have to write these words, asking for help to simply keep my family alive. I used to work as a painter and decorator, taking pride in providing for my family and raising my two boys, Arafa and Mohammed, with love and security. But everything changed overnight.
Our home, the place where we built memories, was destroyed in a bombing. The car I depended on to make a living was reduced to ashes. We were left with nothing. Now, my familyâmy wife, my parents, my brother Ahmed, and my boysâare crammed into a school near the Port of Gaza, a shelter that is no longer a place of learning, but a refuge for the displaced.
The constant sound of gunfire and bombs haunt us day and night. Each explosion shakes the ground beneath us and tears at our spirits. My children, Arafa and Mohammed, once so full of life, now cower in fear. They have nightmares and cry in their sleep. The trauma they are enduring has stolen their childhood. My heart breaks every time I see the fear in their eyes, knowing that I canât make it go away.
We are living in survival mode. There is no money for food. No fuel to stay warm as winter creeps closer. No medicine to treat the constant sicknesses that come with our living conditions. And no warm clothing to protect my children from the freezing nights that are just around the corner. I watch them shiver, hungry and cold, and I feel utterly powerless as a father.
Weâve lost everything, and I have no means to provide for my family. Weâve reached a point where we cannot survive without help. I never thought Iâd be in this positionâhaving to rely on the generosity of strangers to keep my family alive. But I am here, pleading with you, because the alternative is unthinkable.
Please, if you can spare anything at all, it could mean the difference between life and death for us. Your donation, no matter how small, can help us buy food so my children wonât go to bed hungry. It can help us find fuel to keep warm in the brutal winter months ahead. It can provide medicine for my boys and warm clothing to protect them from the cold.
I know the world is full of need right now, but I hope you can find it in your heart to help my family. We are just one of many who have lost everything, but to us, your kindness could change our world. It could give my children a chance to feel safe again, to heal from the trauma they are carrying, and to survive the months ahead.
Thank you for reading, for caring, and for anything you can do to help. Your generosity will not only provide us with the necessities we need to survive but also restore a bit of hope in a time when it feels like all hope has been lost.
With all my heart, thank you.
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Unrequited love
In which reader has been haunted all her life by the ghost of unrequited love, always reminding her of everything she could never have. That is â until she met Spencer.
Pairing: Spencer Reid x Fem!BAU!Reader Genre: angst x fluff x smut (18+) Content warnings: spoilers for s8e12, very angsty but no worries there's a happy ending Word count: 5,4k A/n: for anyone who can relate to not having their love reciprocated, I'm hoping you'll find your spencer reid soon
Itâs stupid, really, to love someone so wholeheartedly. Itâs even more stupid to expect them to love you back.
Never in your life had anyone reciprocated your love â hell, no one had even accepted it. Unrequited love was a burden that has clung to you all your life, a thread of rejection woven through the fabric of your earliest memories.Â
You remember the moment clearly, when as a little girl you found your mother hunched over the dining room table, furiously wiping away tears she did not want you to see. You watched from afar, making sure she left the room when you tiptoed to the table, finding a piece of paper ripped out of a notebook. Your small finger traced the letters of the handwritten note. The words were jagged, some unfamiliar, making you skip them. You experienced a rush of pride and excitement when you could make out some words: leaving, sorry, woman, goodbye. It was the first time youâd read something that wasnât written in the large colorful books Miss Abigail assigned in school. It wasnât until a few days later, when your mother explained that your father wasnât coming back, that the weight of the note fully sank in. From that moment on it felt like your fate was sealed.Â
In middle school you had some friends, but when the moment came to pairing up for school trips, it was you being the one left out. You always had someone you would call your best friend, but youâd never be theirs. Someone always seemed to be better, more lovable, more wanted.Â
In highschool, you got your first boyfriend, Timmy. You werenât sure you loved him, but you wanted to be seen, to be noticed. So when he asked you out, you said yes. For a while, you reveled in the feeling of someone showing you off. That was until the day you overheard his friends, talking by the lockers.
âI swear, his tactic is working!â one of them said. âJessica dumped James the second she saw Timmy walking hand in hand with Y/N through the hallways.âÂ
âOh shit, man,â another friend laughed. âIf I knew that, I also wouldâve used a fake girlfriend to get to Hannah.âÂ
A fake girlfriend. The words echoed in your mind as you started to make sense of the situation. It suddenly clicked how Timmy only showed you off in public, only kissed you in the busy hallways, where people could see. It was never about you.
You decided to give love one more chance in university, but when a night that was supposed to be the first of many, ended in a one-night-stand and a âIâm sorry, but I donât really see you that wayâ, you made yourself a vow: no more chasing love. You stopped giving your love to people who would never truly appreciate it, and instead, you gave that love to yourself. The library became your refuge, spending endless hours studying to give yourself the future you deserve. You passed your exams with flying colors and never forgot to reward yourself after every small victory. And when you landed a position at the BAU, making it as an FBI agent, you knew you made the right decision to never fall in love again. That was until you stepped into the office, and you saw him. Spencer Reid.Â
â
âAnd this is doctor Spencer Reid,â your boss Hotchner introduced him with a nod.Â
He was tall, awkward in the way only someone who was brilliant could be, but he smiled warmly as he waved a hand at you. âHi.â
You smiled back and stuck out your hand instinctively. âNice to meet you, Iâm Y/N Y/L/N.â
He blinked at the gesture, looking uncomfortable. He swallowed, his voice uncertain. âItâs nothing personal, I just donât like shaking hands.â
You tilted your head and laughed. âThatâs totally fair. Do you know how many germs your hands carry?â
His eyes widened in surprise, as if no one had ever said that before. âI-I actually do! The number of pathogens passed during a handshake is staggering. Itâs actually safer to-â
âKiss?â you interrupted, a grin spreading across your face.
The words came out simultaneously, and you both laughed. A sound that felt... easy. Like something you hadnât experienced before.
Someone you would later come to know as Morgan, who had been leaning against a desk, looked up at the two of you, eyebrows raised in disbelief as he shook his head.Â
It was then you realized â there was something special about Spencer Reid. It was something unspoken, something more than just the intellectual connection. Before you even knew it, you had fallen in love.
â
You never confessed your feelings to Spencer, but you felt like there was an unspoken understanding between you. Every morning, you arrived at work with an oversweetened cup of coffee for him, and in return, he made sure you never went without your favorite sandwich from the shop around the corner, especially on days when you were too absorbed in a case to remember to eat. On your days off, you took each other on trips. Sometimes to a museum where you would explain the art in great detail, and he would pretend not to know any of the facts, just to hear you talk. Other times, youâd go to a movie screening, where he would simultaneously whisper translations of the foreign dialogue to you, making you giggle when his breath tickled your ear. You convinced yourself that this was what love was: understanding someone to the point of not needing words.
But how foolish were you to have forgotten about the shadow that lingered behind you, always ready to remind you of everything you could never have.
â
âY/N, Y/N, Y/N! Have you heard the news?â Penelope squealed in delight as she rushed toward you, the rhythmic click of her heels making a melody against the office floor.Â
You glanced up from your desk, raising an eyebrow. âBased on the excitement, Iâm going to assume you're not talking about the wildfires in California.â
âOh no, no,â she said, her eyes sparkling with mischief. âIâm talking about big news. The juicy kind.â
You chuckled, leaning back in your chair as you sipped your tea. âAlright Pen, bring it on.â
Penelopeâs grin widened. âSpencer has a girlfriend!â She yelped, hands flying to her mouth as she realized just how loud sheâs gotten.
You blink as you try to process her words. âHe finally adopted a cat?âÂ
Penelope shook her head vigorously. âY/N, I mean a real girlfriend. An actual human being girlfriend!â
You scrunch your forehead, the words not quite connecting. âI donât think I understand.â
Penelope leans in closer, her voice dropping to a whisper. âDerek told me that Blake told him that Spencerâs been making calls... to a woman.â She glances around quickly, making sure no one can overhear.Â
The words hit you like a punch to the gut. Your smile drops at the familiarity of the situation. Spencer had been leaving the bullpen often recently. Youâd always assumed it was because he was still struggling with his headaches and didnât want the team to get worried. Not in a million years would you have expected Spencer was seeing someone.
Penelope continues speaking, but her words fade into the background as your thoughts spiral. âExcuse me,â you mutter, your voice barely above a whisper as you push yourself out of your chair and rush to the bathroom.
Once inside, you lock the door behind you. Your chest tightens, the familiar weight of a panic attack settling in as if it had never left. Your breath comes short and shallow, the room spinning slightly as you grip the sink. The air feels thick, suffocating even. For the first time in years you find yourself back in this situation, fighting to breathe.
â
After a while, the whispers and giggles about Reid's love affair had died down. Still, it took Spencer some time to feel comfortable enough to share more about her â Maeve Donovan, the brilliant, lovely woman who had stolen his heart. As his best friend, you were the one he turned to, the one who had to endure all the little details of their intimate phone calls.
And you tried, you really did. You tried to be the supportive friend, even when each word about Maeve felt like a thorn in your chest. Youâd joke, asking him if he was sure Maeve wasnât some sixty-year-old man catfishing him, or teasing him about how it didnât count as a relationship if youâd never actually met the person. The snark was the only way you could cope with the sinking feeling every time he smiled when her name came up, the way his eyes lit up when he spoke of her. But Spencer was oblivious to your remarks. No matter how hard you tried to plant seeds of doubt in his mind, it never seemed to have any effect.
It was a sad thing to admit, but on nights when anxiety kept you awake, you couldnât help but wish for their relationship to end. You prayed for a chance to tell Spencer how you really felt. You convinced yourself there would be time, that everything was going well, and eventually youâd find the courage to speak up. But on nights like these, you deeply regret never having thought of the possibility of another girl realizing how incredible Spencer is, and making a move before you ever could.Â
Those feelings of jealousy turned into big regret, when Spencer came bursting into the bullpen, panic and fear evident in his eyes. He was frantic, certain that Maeve had been kidnapped. His suspicions turned out to be tragically true, and your world crumbled the moment the gunshot rang out, taking Maeve from him. Your heart shattered into a thousand pieces as Spencer broke down in front of you, and you couldnât even reach out to comfort him, believing it was you who caused this. That the ghost you knew as unrequited love, finally gave you what you wished for.Â
You wanted to scream, to turn back time, to take back every selfish thought. But now wasnât the time for regret. When Spencer locked himself in his apartment, unwilling to speak to anyone, you made it your mission to be there for him. You were the only person he let in, and when the door creaked open, you were struck by the sight of him â pale, hollow-eyed, and worn down in a way youâd never seen before. Without a word, he pulled you into a tight embrace. The two of you cried together, until his neighbor shouted at you both for the noise. From that moment on, youâd take Spencer to your apartment. Making sure he had a warm, homemade meal waiting for him as youâd binge Doctor Who episodes, trying to get him to smile even just a little. Slowly, he began to open up, the weight of his grief pouring out in quiet conversations. And you made sure you listened to every word as you held him close, offering whatever comfort you could.
As the weeks passed by, the weight of the situation was becoming overwhelming. It wasnât easy hearing the love of your life talk about another woman. The way he spoke about her, like she meant more to him after just a couple of months than you ever did in all the years you stood by his side. It was almost too much to bear. When you overheard a moment between Reid and JJ, where Spencer mentioned how he wouldâve had kids if it werenât for Maeve dying, you realized you couldnât keep going like this. You needed time to process what you were feeling, to grieve what youâd lost â even if it wasnât really yours to begin with. So, you called in sick for the next case. Hoping you could clear your mind, while the team was out of state.
â
So here you were, experiencing heartbreak like all those times before â rotting on the couch with a pint of ice cream as you watched reruns of Love Island.Â
You jumped when a loud banging echoed from the front door. Your surprise faded as quickly as it came, knowing there was only one person that would bother you this late an hour.Â
âY/N, I know youâre in there. Open up!â Spencerâs voice rang out, firm and insistent.
With a sigh, you shuffled to the front door, trying to steady yourself before facing him. The moment you opened the door, you were met with Spencer, brows furrowed in concern and annoyance.
âWhere were you? You didnât show up on the jet, and youâre never late,â he said, brushing past you to step inside.
âSure, let yourself in,â you muttered under your breath, closing the door behind him. âI wasnât feeling well, had a headache,â you replied, keeping your tone casual.
Spencer paused, taking a quick glance around the room. His eyes landed on the TV blaring in the background and the half-empty pint of ice cream on the coffee table. He turned back to you, eyebrows raised.
âYour TV is on full blast, and youâre eating ice cream,â he said, his tone skeptical, clearly aware of your lie.
You sighed, shoulders slumping. âIâm sorry, I just needed a break.âÂ
âA break?â He scoffed. âYou never take breaks. We practically had to force you to stay home when you got shot. Youâre always there, no matter what. I needed you, and you werenât there.â
As much as you appreciated hearing that he needed you, this wasnât the time to feel flattered by it. âSpencer, I know,â you started, your voice taut with frustration. âI just had my own things to worry about.â
âWhat things?â He stepped closer, his tone rising. âWhat could be more important than your work? Then being there for a friend when he needs you?â It was obvious how upset he was. âI was worried about you,â he continued, his voice breaking slightly. âI called you every day, and you didnât pick up.â
His words hit harder than you expected, and a bitter laugh escaped before you could stop it. âWhat about me, Spencer?â you snapped. âHave you ever thought about me needing a break? Or am I not important enough for that?â
âOh, please.â His voice dripped with disbelief. âYouâve always been there for me, but suddenly you canât pick up your phone because you need time for yourself?â
âGod, youâre such an ass,â you shot back, the words slipping out before you could stop them.
âMe? Iâm the ass?â His voice pitched higher, his eyes widening in disbelief.
âYes, Spencer! I told you I wasnât feeling good. I needed time off.â
âYou couldâve just picked up the damn phone!â he yelled, his voice cracking with emotion. âDo you even realize how worried I was?â
âIt sounds like you were more worried about yourself than me,â you countered, your tone icy.
His face twisted in frustration, but then his shoulders sagged. âIs that what you think?â He asked quietly, his voice trembling. âI was worried about you. Can you even imagine what it was like for me to call and get no answer?â
You swallowed. For a split second your mind drifted to Maeve, thinking that he mightâve felt the same fear as when she didnât pick up the phone. You quickly put the thought away, he didnât care about you like that.
âIf youâd just asked Hotch, you wouldâve gotten an answer right away,â you said defensively, crossing your arms to shield yourself.
âOh, so Hotch knew?â His tone turned bitter, his eyes narrowing.
âOf course, Spencer. Heâs my boss!â
âAnd I am your friend! I always tell you everything before I let anyone else know.â
You rolled your eyes, frustration taking over. âWell, thatâs on you. Just because you feel the need to bother everyone with your problems doesnât mean I have to do the same.â
The instant regret was written all over your face as the words left your mouth. Spencerâs expression shifted, looking completely stunned.
âSpencer, I didnât mean-â
But the damage was done. His shoulders stiffened, his jaw tightening as he looked away.
âPlease, Spence, I swear I didnât mean it like that,â you said softly, your voice trembling as you reached out to him, but he instinctively stepped back.
âSpencer, Iâm so sorry,â you pleaded, your voice cracking. âI donât know why I said that.â
He shook his head, his lips pressing into a thin line. âOh, but you said it. And you meant it.â His voice was quieter now, but somehow it felt heavier. The anger in his eyes had faded, replaced with something worse: disappointment.
âSpencer,â you whispered, the sound barely audible, terrified to say anything else that could upset him.
He looked down, his shoulders sagging as he exhaled shakily. When he finally looked back at you, his expression had softened slightly, though the hurt still lingered in his eyes. âDo you really think Iâm someone who bothers people with my problems?â he asked, his voice raw with vulnerability.
âNo!â you said quickly, the desperation clear in your tone. âI donât know why I said that. I donât think that at all. Iâm so glad you opened up to me and trusted me with your feelings.â
âAnd yetâŚâ he trailed off, rubbing his temples in frustration. âYou ignored my calls. You avoided me. And then you said that. Jesus.â His hands fell to his sides as he let out a tired sigh, his exhaustion etched into every feature.
âSpencer,â you started, but he interrupted. âI donât understand,â he said, looking at you like he was searching for answers he couldnât find. âIf youâre glad I talk to you about my feelings, why did you shut me out?â
You swallowed hard, the weight of his question bearing down on you. âItâs just⌠a lot to handle, Spence,â you admitted. âIâm not a therapist. I donât know how to deal with these feelings. I want to be there for you, I really do, but it takes a toll on me too.â
âIt takes a toll on you too?â His voice rose, and you cursed yourself for triggering another outburst without meaning to. âIâm the one with âthe problemâ. Iâm the one with the dead girlfriend! All you had to do was be there for me when I needed you.â
You exhaled heavily. âIâm getting a drink,â you muttered as you made your way over to the kitchen. Spencer followed behind you, not willing to give up yet.
âOf course,â Spencer said, with a sarcastic edge. âGrab a drink. Thatâll fix everything.â
Ignoring him, you grabbed a glass and poured a generous amount of whiskey. You raised it to your lips, savoring the burn as you swallowed.
He crossed his arms, watching you with a raised eyebrow. âYou know what? Go ahead. Keep ignoring the problem. Thatâs what youâre good at, right? Avoiding things.â He said, his tone filled with hurt.Â
Your hand trembled slightly as you set the glass down. âI know you donât believe me,â you said, voice shaking, âbut I am trying.â
âTrying?â Spencerâs laugh was humorless. âYou didnât even call me. You just disappeared. I needed you, and you left. What kind of âtryingâ is that?â
âGod, Spencer, I didnât want to avoid you. I wanted to pick up the phone, to explain everything, but I couldnât. I knew Iâd just hurt you more, and I couldnât-â Your voice broke against your will. âI couldnât risk ruining all the progress youâve made.â
Spencerâs expression softened, his furrowed brow easing as confusion replaced his anger. âYouâre not protecting me by keeping whatever it is thatâs bothering you to yourself. Youâre hurting me even more by shutting me out. I want to be able to help you when youâre struggling, Y/N.â
Your throat tightened, tears threatening to spill. You bit your lip, trying to hold your words in.
âPlease,â he whispered, his hand gently taking yours. âLet me in. Let me help you like youâve helped me.âÂ
You stared at him, your chest aching. How could you possibly tell him? How could you burden him with this truth when he was already carrying so much? But the way he looked at you, so desperate â it broke something inside you.
The words escaped before you could stop them. âIâm in love with you.â
Spencer froze, his heart skipping a beat as he loosened his grip on your hand, making you regret speaking up.
âYou.. youâre in love with me?â He asked, his voice a mix of surprise and disbelief.
âIâm so sorry,â you whispered, guilt twisting in your chest.
He stared at you in silence, his gaze unreadable as he processed your words. After a long pause, he spoke up. âYouâre sorry?â
Tears spilled down your cheeks as you nodded. âIâm an awful friend,â you whispered, your voice breaking.
âNo, no, no,â Spencer said quickly, stepping closer. His heart ached as he reached up to gently cup your face, brushing away your tears with his thumbs, hating to see you cry. âYou are not an awful friend â youâre wonderful.â
âDonât say that,â you said, shaking your head. âIâm not wonderful, Spencer. I listened to you grieve every night, and still I felt jealous because she got your love, even if it was just for a second.â
His eyes widened. âJealous?â he asked softly. âYou were jealous of Maeve?â
You cringed at his words, shame tightening your chest. âI know, itâs disgusting. I get it if you never want to see me again.â
âIs that what you think? That Iâd stop wanting to see you?â He shook his head. âHow can you think Iâd judge you for having feelings for me?â
âBecause I blame myself, Spencer!â you cried. âI shouldâve been happy for you, but I wasnât. And now sheâs gone, and I feel like itâs my fault.â
He closed the distance between you, wrapping his arms around you and pulling you into a tight embrace. âDonât you dare blame yourself for any of that. You didnât make any of those things happen,â he reassured. âThey were just⌠they were just an unfortunate turn of events. You didnât have any control over it.â He held you tightly against him, trying to comfort you as his heart ached.Â
âYou shouldnât touch me,â you sniffled, but you werenât able to pull yourself away, needing his touch.
He pulled back slightly, just enough to tilt your face up to meet his eyes. âI should touch you,â he said firmly. âI should hold you, and comfort you, and be there for you. Because thatâs what friends do. Thatâs what I want to do.â
âIâm so sorry,â you whispered, your voice quivering with emotion. âI did feel jealous, but please, donât think for a second that I didnât care. Iâd do anything to bring her back.â
âI know you care,â he murmured into your hair. âI know you do. Thatâs why I could never think of you as a bad friend.â
You cried against his chest, the weight of everything finally crashing down. His arms tightened around you, his hold warm and grounding. âItâs okay,â he murmured, his voice barely above a whisper. âIâve got you.â
You shook your head. âYou shouldnât be the one comforting me.â
âYes, I should,â he said. His arms didnât loosen, holding you as if he feared youâd vanish if he let go. âYour feelings matter. Your happiness matters. I donât want you putting yourself aside for my sake.â
Something in his tone gave you the courage to lift your gaze. His eyes met yours, searching, filled with an emotion you hadnât dared to hope for. Slowly, he reached out, his thumb brushing against your tear-streaked cheek with a gentleness that made your chest ache.Â
âI mean it,â he said, his voice firm. âYou matter to me, more than you probably realize.â
You leaned into his touch instinctively, the warmth of his hand calming you. âYou can still talk to me,â you said quietly. âI just⌠I needed a break. But we can still have our talks.â
He nodded, a small smile tugging at the corner of his mouth. âI know. And Iâll take you up on that.âÂ
His hand remained on your face as he leaned closer, his voice dropping to a tender murmur. âI care about you. I always have, and I always will.â
The proximity was impossible to ignore as his thumb traced slow, soft circles on your cheek, his eyes locked on yours. âIâm sorry,â he began, his voice quiet and pained, âfor not realizing sooner how you felt about me.â
âItâs fine, Spence,â you replied, lifting your shoulders. âI shouldâve been more obvious.â
He let out a quiet sigh, his heart heavy with remorse. âYou were, I shouldâve known. Penelope and JJ never treated me the way you did.â He admitted. âI wasted so much time. I could have had you, but I was too blind to see it.â
âYou⌠you would want to be with me?â you asked, surprise noticeable in your voice.
His eyes softened, his expression filled with disbelief. âOf course I would. How could I not? Youâre smart, youâre funny, youâre caring, youâre beautiful...â His voice dropped to a tender hum. âYouâre everything.âÂ
You looked away, as doubt crept in. âYouâre just confused,â you said. âI gave you a lot to process all at once.â
âIâm not confused,â he said steadily, his tone leaving no room for argument. âNot about this. I know how I feel. I know that itâs you that I want.â
Your heart ached at how convincing he sounded, but you couldnât stop your uncertainty. âYouâre not over her, Spence.â
The mention of Maeve made him swallow, his gaze flicked downward for a moment. âI know,â he said quietly, as he looked up at you. âI know Iâm not completely over her. I may never be. But that doesnât change how I feel about you.â
Tears welled in your eyes. âIt doesnât feel fair,â you admitted, your voice barely above a whisper. âIâve wanted you for so long. It doesnât feel fair that I get to have you now.â
Spencer gently pulled you closer, the simple comfort of having you in his arms overwhelming. âYou deserve everything, Y/N. Youâve been there for me through everything. Youâre one of the most selfless, most loyal, most caring people I know.âÂ
The warmth in his gaze, the tenderness in his touch, made it impossible to look away.
âI need you,â he said, his voice a raw confession. âNot talking to you these past days was torture. I canât do this without you. I need you in my life, Y/N. Not just as a friend.â He paused, his voice softening. âYou deserve to be loved, please let me be the one to do that.â
You felt your breath catch, not finding the words to express how youâre feeling. âCan I kiss you?â
His lips parted in surprise, but his eyes softened, filling with an emotion that made your chest ache. He nodded, âYes. Please.â
His hands were warm against your cheeks as he pressed his lips to yours. The kiss was everything â urgent, raw, and filled with years of unspoken longing. A soft, desperate sound escaped your throat, conveying all the need youâd kept bottled up for so long. Spencer seemed to feel it, deepening the kiss as his fingers threaded into your hair, afraid you might slip away.
He effortlessly lifted you onto the kitchen counter, his body fitting perfectly between your legs as you wrapped them tightly around his waist. The closeness wasnât enough to satisfy your need. Your fingers found his tie, fumbling to loosen it before letting it fall to the floor.
As you moved to the buttons of his shirt, Spencer groaned softly against your lips, the vibration sending shivers down your spine. The moment your hands met his bare skin, his breath hitched, and his grip on your hips tightened. The heat of his body was intoxicating, and every inch of him seemed to respond to your touch.
âGod, Y/NâŚâ he murmured against your lips, his voice rough and filled with desire. His forehead rested briefly against yours, his chest rising and falling rapidly as he caught his breath. But his hands never stopped, sliding down your sides and pulling you even closer.
You continued your exploration, your fingertips tracing the planes of his chest and shoulders as if trying to memorize him.Â
Youâd always imagined taking your time when this moment finally came â savoring every touch, every kiss. But now that it was happening, you couldnât stop the rush coursing through you. The need to feel him everywhere, to prove that this was real.
âSpencer, please,â you whimpered against his mouth, your voice filled with desperation.
âI know, sweet girl,â he murmured, knowing exactly what you needed. His hands slid down to your thighs, gently parting them to make room for himself. The warmth of his touch had you gasping, and you let out a quiet cry of relief as his fingers moved to his belt, the soft clink of the buckle filling the air.
You didnât want to waste any time, tugging your pants down your legs in a frenzy, eager to meet him halfway. Spencerâs gaze flickered to yours, his eyes dark with need, and in an instant, his mouth was on yours again.
His kiss was hungry, consuming. One hand gripped your waist, holding himself steady, while the other hooked beneath your leg, lifting it effortlessly to pull you closer. The heat between you is overwhelming, every touch igniting yet another spark.Â
You threw your head back as he rubbed the tip of his cock against your wet folds. A soft gasp escaped your lips, your mouth forming a perfect âOâ as he slowly pushed into you, the stretch intoxicating. Your fingers gripped his back as you sunk your nails into his skin.
The sharp bite of pain drew a low, guttural groan from him, his face buried in the curve of your neck. His breath was hot against you as he murmured your name like a prayer.
âI wish weâd done this sooner,â you gasped, as he began to move, his hips rolling into yours.Â
His breath hitched at your words, and he pressed a soft kiss to your jawline. âI know, baby,â he mumbled. âWeâll make up for it,â
A soft giggle escaped you, but it was quickly swallowed by a moan as his pace quickened.Â
âOh, Spence⌠Iâm already close,â you confessed, never having reached an orgasm this fast.
âThank God,â he groaned, his voice rough with desperation, as his grip on your hips tightened. He guided you to meet his thrusts, the intensity of his movements growing erratic, overwhelmed by pleasure.Â
Unable to resist, you cupped his face, pulling him into an open-mouthed kiss as you moaned and gasped for breath.Â
Your walls clenched around him, drawing a string of desperate whimpers from your lips as your head fell back. Spencer took full advantage of your exposed neck, sucking and biting on the skin, claiming you. His thrusts grew deeper, determined to hit the spot that made you cry out in pleasure.
His low, breathy moans filled the air, and you could tell he was close. Your legs began to shake around him, and as if perfectly in sync, your release crashed over you just as he shuddered and spilled into you.
âI love you,â you gasped, the words leaving your lips over and over as your orgasm rushed through you. Tears streamed down your face, blurring your vision. You couldnât tell if it was the sheer intensity of the feeling or the flood of emotions youâd been bottling up for so long, but what you did know is that you meant every word.
Spencer stayed close, his breaths uneven as he gently rocked into you, drawing out the shared high. Slowly, he pulled back just enough to brush your hair out of your tear-streaked face. His eyes locked onto yours, and it felt like he truly saw you â every part of you.
A soft smile tugged at his lips as he pressed his forehead to yours.
âI love you too.â
#criminal minds#criminal minds fanfiction#spencer reid x fem!reader#spencer reid x reader#spencer reid x you#spencer reid#spencer reid fanfiction#spencer reid smut#spencer reid x y/n#spencer reid angst#criminal minds smut#criminal minds angst#criminal minds fluff#spencer reid fluff#spencer reid x self insert#spencer reid x oc#spencer reid imagine#spencer reid fic
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Hello...My name is Mohammad Dawood, Iâm 18 years old, and Iâm from Gaza.
Like every family here, mine lived a simple life full of daily challenges, but we always found a way to livece. That was until the recent war, which left us with nothing but painful memories.
During those dark days, we lived in constant fear. Every night, we would hear the sounds of bombs getting closer, and the drone of planes overhead never ceased. We huddled together in a small corner of our old house, praying to survive. My younger siblings' eyes were filled with tears and terror. One night, the worst happened. A sudden missile strike tore through our home and shattered our dreams. Thankfully, every member of my family survived, but we lost everything we owned.
My father, Nabeel, who worked tirelessly to provide for us, lost his workshop in the bombing. I also lost my small job, which helped support our large family. All the savings we had quickly ran out, and we found ourselves homeless.
We were relocated to an unfinished school in Gaza. This school is not fit for human habitation. There is no roof to protect us from the rain or the heat, no clean water to drink, and we live in inhumane conditions. The children can't attend school because theirs was destroyed, and even the simplest things, like a peaceful nightâs sleep, have become a luxury we can no longer afford.
My brother Youssef, who is 12, cannot sleep at night because of the sounds of explosions that still haunt him. My little sister Hala, who is only 6, asks me every day, âWhen are we going back to our home?â and I have no answer for her. My youngest brother Mahmoud, who is 3, no longer knows what it means to play or laugh. The war has robbed them of their childhood and taken everything from us.
My mother Suha tries to remain strong, but we all know how exhausted she is. Every day we wake up to the same nightmare, not knowing when this suffering will end. We live without security, without a clear future. Life here is filled with fear and uncertainty.
We are now in desperate need of help. We need to build a new home, to provide a safe haven for my siblings and my family, to have a chance to live with dignity. Your support can restore the hope we lost and give us a new chance at life.
Your donation, no matter how small, can make a huge difference in our lives. Help us overcome this hardship and build a better future..
#free palstine#all eyes on palestine#i stand with palestine#palestinian genocide#save palestine#free palestine#free gaza#@sar soor#@90 ghost#save gaza#go fund me#gif
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Pt.3 SILLLY LITTLE BAT.
pairings ⸺ Yandere! Platonic! Batfamily x Anti-hero! Fem!reader.
sinopsis ⸺ There are only memories, fragments of a past that, like shadows, will haunt you until your last breath, whispers of what was and will never be. Gotham cries out for a guardian, a soul to face the darkness, to challenge fate in its shadowy alleys.
But tell me, who will rise to protect you, traveler of scars and broken dreams? Who will watch over your light when the world swallows your hopes?
In the eternal night, amidst the echo of fear and longing, there is only one path: to confront the monsters and become the hero this city needs, even if the price is the forgetting of oneself.
warnings ⸺ Dark Themes, Dead, Religion, murdering,Disturbing Content, Unhealthy Obsession, Discrimination, Street Fights, Gaslight, Violence, Blood, LGBT Content, Child Abuse, Kidnapping, Implicit Sexual Content, Mental Illness, Addiction, Torture, Corruption, Isolation, Trauma, Phobias, Paranoia, Manipulation.
Chapter guide! Pt.1 Pt2. Pt.4
A/N â English is not my first languageâSpanish isâ Here is the continuation of the other parts. There will be a few more parts but you should know that we will soon reach the end, but there are still things to clarify and so on. I don't know if you would like me to do another Batfam yandere series in the future or similar. Send me your ideas if you want :3
They are upset because I left
Where they never included me.
The car moved slowly under the gray sky of Gotham, as if the universe itself understood the weight of the pain you carried in your small figure. Commissioner Gordon, with his firm hands on the wheel, cast furtive glances at the rearview mirror, where he saw you curled up in the back seat. Wrapped in an old blanket, the same one you had hugged for days, your face was hidden among the folds, but the silent tears that fell could not be disguised. There were no words that Gordon could offer to heal the recent wound of losing your mother, but his empathy, though silent, was there, wrapping around you like the coat that couldn't quite warm you.
In your lap, a small Batman doll rested, pressed against your chest, as if that fabric toy could protect you from the world that had just destroyed your innocence. Your eyes, still swollen and red, looked out the window without seeing, watching the city that seemed so distant, so foreign.
"You will be loved and cherished," Gordon whispered, breaking the silence that had weighed like fog in the car. "Bruce Wayne... he will take care of you, I promise."
But you didn't respond immediately. The name Wayne felt strange, distant, as if he spoke of someone living in a story, not in your reality. You looked up, your eyes meeting Gordonâs for a second in the rearview mirror.
"And if they don't want me...?" you murmured, insecurity clouding your childish voice. "I don't know them, Commissioner... and they don't know me. What if they leave me in an orphanage? Mama always told me those places aren't nice."
Gordon swallowed hard, understanding the depth of your fear. "You were just a child, but you had already learned that love was not a guarantee." The world had taught you that cruel lesson too soon.
"The Waynes..." he began, searching for the right words, "are good people. You might not understand it at first, but I assure you they have suffered too. Bruce..." he paused, recalling the losses that man had faced. "He understands what it is to lose someone. He will do everything he can to make you feel safe, to help you find a home again."
But you kept looking at the doll in your hands, your fingers squeezing it tightly, as if it were the only stable thing in a world crumbling around you.
The silence grew heavy, uncomfortable, as if the words wanted to come out but didnât know how. Again, Gordon spoke, his voice low, almost afraid to break the stillness.
"And/y/n... what was your mom like?" he asked softly, not taking his eyes off the road, as if by doing so, he could give you space to be honest, to not feel pressured.
You fell silent for a long moment, your small fingers nervously playing with the edges of the blanket. The world outside the car seemed a reflection of what you felt inside: cloudy, cold, distant.
Finally, you exhaled, as if gathering the courage to speak. Your voice came out shaky at first, filled with a mix of sadness and a hard-to-accept truth.
"My mom..." you murmured, not taking your eyes off the window. "She wasn't a good person, but... she wasn't a villain either."
Gordon nodded slowly, without interrupting you. He knew things were rarely black or white, that life had that cruel ability to mix the two.
"She... told me she grew up in an orphanage. She never had anything that was really hers." You paused, your eyes glassy as you recalled details that now seemed more painful than ever. "Well, except for me."
"Gordon felt a knot form in his throat." He knew that loss was a terrible burden to bear, but there was something more in your words, something suggesting that, amidst it all, there had also been love. An imperfect love, but real.
"She always dreamed of having a little house..." you continued, and for the first time, a faint smile appeared on your face, though it was tinged with melancholy. "A house with a garden, lots of Barbie dolls, and a little dog. She didn't need more. She just wanted something that was hers."
You stopped for a moment, as if the simple act of recalling those dreams your mother had hurt you. You knew she would never have them. That the world had been cruel to her, denying her even the small things she wished for so fervently.
"But... she never got it. We were always moving around, fleeing, searching for something better. And now... she doesnât even have that."
The car seemed to shrink, the air denser. Gordon felt a wave of compassion for that woman who, though perhaps not perfect, had dreamed of something so simple, so human, and yet had not achieved it.
"I'm so sorry, Y/n," he murmured.
"Commissioner, what if... what if I can't forget her?" you asked, almost in a whisper. "What if I can't stop thinking about Mom?"
The silence in the car became heavy, almost tangible. Gordon wanted to tell you that you didn't have to forget, that it was natural to carry that pain. But the words didn't come, and instead, only a long sigh escaped his lips.
"It's not about forgetting, Y/n," he finally said, his voice low but firm. "It's about moving forward, even though it hurts. Your mother would want you to find happiness again, even though it may not seem possible now. And Iâm sure Bruce will do everything in his power to help you."
The car turned onto the long, dark road leading to Wayne Manor. The trees formed a tunnel of shadows, as if the road were wrapped in the same mourning you carried within. The mansion, with its imposing grandeur, appeared in the distance, its walls as high as the secrets it held. "You were so small in the face of the immensity of this new life that awaited you."
"We're almost there," Gordon said softly, as he slowed down. "The wind outside whispered through the trees, like an echo of everything you had lost."
You didnât know it at that moment, but that house would be full of stories, some broken, others in the process of healing. And although you felt like a stranger in a strange land now, Gordon hoped that, one day, that place would become your refuge.
The car stopped in front of the enormous gates. Gordon looked at you one last time before getting out. In his eyes, you could see a mix of sadness and hope, an empathy that went beyond words.
"You are not alone, Y/n," he said, his voice now firmer. "You will never be alone again."
You remained silent, gazing at the mansion as you clung to the blanket and the Batman doll. The weight of the world still rested on your small shoulders, but for the first time, there might have been a glimmer of relief in knowing that someone, even if he was a strange and distant man, was waiting for you inside."
And in that moment, although you still felt the burning pain of your loss, a ray of hope began to break through the shadows of your heart.
Y/n was sitting in the BatCafĂŠ, that corner of the city where the tables wobbled and conversations were woven into murmurs, as if the place knew how to keep secrets that even you wouldnât dare to share aloud. The walls, a mossy green, were filled with stories that no one had asked for. She looked at her lukewarm latte as one looks at a future that hasnât quite arrived, a liquid mockery evaporating before it could warm her hands. It had barely been a month since she left her family home, but she already felt that independence was more of a myth than a fulfilled dream. At first, the heroism of having thrown herself into the world had filled her with pride, but now reality lurked like a treacherous chill seeping through the cracks, and the fact that she was waiting for her potential roommate didnât help matters.
âWell, at least the rent will be cheaper,â she told herself, or rather to the coffee, as if the dark liquid could reply with something sensible.
Sharing an apartment was, for Y/n, the only way out. Her salary barely covered survival, but only if she fed on fresh air and broken dreams. And there she was, waiting for someone named Pamela Isley, who, according to the ad, didnât even seem to be from this planet. "I hope sheâs not one of those people with invisible cats," she thought. Of course, the alternatives werenât very promising: people who collected Batman figurines or guys who made friends with cockroaches in the kitchen. She had seen it all; after all, her apartment was in one of the most dangerous areas of Gotham, and she knew it all too well.
You were born in that area. One could say the neighborhood chose you before you had a chance to choose it. You didnât remember exactly which apartment; in that hive of broken windows and half-painted bricks, all the floors seemed like a blurry copy of the previous one, each with the same square footage and an air of silent resignation. In the end, it didnât matter, because in a way, everything was the same. Dust in the corners, worn tiles, cracks in the walls that seemed to form a map of some invisible and secret city, a place that only you could decipher if you stopped to observe long enough.
It was an unpretentious place, where people rarely smiled, but neither did they let themselves be trampled. There was something in the air, a kind of poorly disguised pride, as if every neighbor, every stray dog, knew that surviving there wasnât a matter of luck but of will. Heroes didnât exist in that corner of the world, but villains didnât dare impose their law without facing some gaze that, without saying anything, said it all. It was rough terrain, where kindness camouflaged behind growls and complaints, and malice grew tired before it could fully settle.
And yet, you loved it. It was absurd, but you loved it with that devotion reserved for things you donât choose, for roots that sink into your chest without asking for permission. The place was filled with memories you didnât ask for, stories you never wanted to hear but that seeped into your skin. Tales of people who vanished in alleyways, of broken promises around the corner, of loves that drowned in factory smoke. And yet, those same tales were like echoes that held you, reminding you that you were born there, in that half-hell where life was always a fight but never a complete defeat.
The clock in the BatCafĂŠ struck six ten when the door opened. What happened next was hard to explain, like when you dream and you donât know if itâs the pillow or the universe holding you. Pamela Isley walked in, and it was as if the wind, that autumn wind that brings memories, had gently pushed her in. Y/n looked up, and the first thing she noticed was her hair, a red that was out of this world, more fire than pigment, more nature than dye. The roots tangled as if they were living branches, and for a moment, Y/n wondered if the sun had made a mistake and was shining only on her.
Pamela walked as if she had a pact with the earth. Her steps were slow but firm, as if her feet waited for the ground to respond before settling. She wore a jacket that was impossible to describe without sounding crazy: green vines and small buds peeking out, as if at any moment the plants would grow over her. "Where does this woman come from?" Y/n thought, feeling something beyond mere curiosity. There was something she couldnât deny, an attraction that felt unsettling, like those waves that, without warning, sweep you away when you think you can still touch the bottom.
Pamela approached the table with a calculated calm, a calm only nature or time can sculpt. And then she smiled. In that smile, Y/n felt something familiar yet strange, as if she were facing a younger version of her mother, but instead of being terrifying, it was comforting. What was happening?
âY/n L/n?â Pamela said, her voice reminiscent of the whisper of dry leaves underfoot.
âYes, thatâs me,â Y/n answered, trying to make her voice sound normal, even though everything inside her felt out of place.
Pamela sat down across from her, crossing her legs with an almost feline elegance. The BatCafĂŠ seemed to conspire around them; the air smelled of wet earth and freshly brewed coffee, a strange mix, like the combination of what was about to be born and what had already died.
âI didnât expect you to beâŚâ Y/n began, not knowing exactly how to finish the sentence. She wasnât even sure what she was expecting.
âStrange?â Pamela completed, with a playful smile that left Y/n with a sense of defeat and fascination in equal parts.
âSomething like that,â Y/n replied, looking at Pamelaâs hands. Her long, slender fingers were covered in small green spots, as if she had just planted a forest with her own hands. There was something almost magical about her, as if every part of her being was connected to the earth in a way that Y/n couldnât quite understand. And there, amid that confusion, was the fine thread of attraction.
Pamela let her gaze fall on her own latte, turning it between her hands as if it were about to reveal some hidden secret in the foam.
âSo, what do you do? I mean⌠aside from, you know⌠looking like you walked out of a Tim Burton movie,â Y/n said, attempting a bit of humor to ease the tension she felt in her stomach.
Pamela glanced at her and laughed softly, a laugh that felt like an unexpected breeze on a hot day.
âIâm⌠a caretaker. Of plants.â She paused, gauging Y/nâs reaction. âAnd other things.â
âOther things?â Y/n asked, intrigued but also amused by the way Pamela toyed with the mystery.
âYes, like people who donât know how to water a plant without drowning it,â she replied, arching an eyebrow mischievously.
The response made Y/n laugh, a laugh she hadnât expected, as if Pamela had found a way to touch something deep within her, something that hadnât bloomed in a long time. And without being able to help it, she felt drawn, not just by the way Pamela moved, spoke, or even by the air of mystery surrounding her, but because there was something more, something familiar, something that reminded her of her mother, but without the shadows of authority and judgment. It was like a wild, free version of what had once been security.
âSo⌠are you going to save my cactus or criticize it?â Y/n said, trying to sound casual while feeling that her heart had started playing a game of chess with her emotions.
Pamela smiled again, and this time it was a different smile, one that seemed to carry a promise.
âIt depends. Would you let me stay to try?â Pamela said, with a playful seriousness that left Y/n unsure whether the question was about the cactus or something much larger.
Y/n blinked, trying to process the phrase, but deep down she knew that any answer would sound awkward. Pamelaâs question hung in the air between them like a leaf falling slowly, right at the perfect point where it was neither entirely a joke nor completely serious. And there she was, caught in that space, wondering whether she should laugh or just blush.
âWell⌠you can try,â she finally said, trying to hide the warmth creeping up her face. âBut I canât promise the cactus will survive. Iâm something like⌠a serial plant killer... When I was younger, I had time to care for them as they deserved, with help from⌠from my father. But now work consumes me a lot, and the truth is Iâve neglected them too much⌠they must feel the same way I felt when⌠sorry, I talk too much about myself, donât I?â
Pamela raised an eyebrow, with a smile that seemed to say more than either of them dared to voice at that moment.
âOh, no, keep talking about yourself; Iâm used to it. I have very⌠eccentric friends, to be honest.â She leaned a bit closer, as if about to share a secret. âThough I prefer not to work under threats, so donât look at me like Iâm going to be your next plant murder victim. But I doubt a little scared bat can kill even a fly.â
Y/n laughed nervously, surprised at how easy Pamela made everything. She, who had always been clumsy with conversations and glances, felt like the words flowed with Pamela in a way she didnât quite understand but didnât want to question either.
â...Little Bat?â Y/n asked, with a clumsy and blushing smile as her fingers nervously toyed with the edge of her cup.
Pamela let out a low giggle, that laugh that always seemed to carry the sound of dry leaves being trampled in autumn. With a gentle gesture, she pointed to her clothes.
âIs it that obvious?â she said with a half-smile, raising a playful eyebrow as she leaned a little forward.
She wore a dark fur coat, enormous, with a wide fall that, under the dim light of the BatCafĂŠ, seemed to have the precise shape of bat wings extending. The high, well-fitted black boots completed the image of a figure that seemed to have emerged from the very shadows. And for a moment, Y/n didnât know whether to laugh or get lost in that air of mystery that Pamela seemed to wear like a second coat.
âWellâŚâ Y/n diverted her gaze with a shy smile, âitâs not like youâre hiding it much.â
Pamela smiled with that touch of mischief that characterized her.
âDoes it bother you? Iâm sorry, itâs just⌠Iâve been fascinated by bats since I was little.â she asked, her voice low and slow, as if measuring every word, as if the world were a delicate plant that required to be touched with the tips of her fingers.
Y/n let out a small nervous laugh, feeling the heat rising to her cheeks again.
âNo, not at all. I think itâsâŚâ she hesitated for a second, searching for the right word, unsure how to avoid the obvious, âI think it suits you well.â
Pamela watched her for a moment, and then, with that look that always seemed to go beyond what words said, added:
âYouâre turning red, you know?â
Y/nâs eyes widened a bit more, surprised by Pamelaâs directness, but all she could do was laugh at herself.
âWell, itâs just that, Iâm not really used to⌠this.â
âThis?â Pamela repeated, raising an eyebrow. âSharing coffee with someone or bats?â
âBoth,â Y/n admitted, shrugging, which provoked another smile from Pamela. âI always wanted one as a pet⌠but I have a vegan little brother whoâs very⌠spooky⌠so Iâve always been afraid heâd steal it from me or accuse me of having exotic pets.â
Pamela settled into the chair, not taking her eyes off Y/n.
âBut youâll get used to it,â she paused, letting her words float calmly.
Y/n felt a shiver run down her spine, a mix of nerves and a spark of something she couldnât quite define. Pamelaâs dark coat and relaxed smile were a disconcerting yet strangely familiar contrast, as if they had always been there, waiting for her. And suddenly, all she could do was wonder how soon that would happen⌠getting used to it.
âAlthough I canât promise my apartment isnât⌠a battlefield,â Y/n said, trying to sound confident, but noticing the slight tremor in her voice.
Pamela looked at her intently for a moment, with that mix of flirtation and something deeper, something that seemed impossible to decipher completely. Then she relaxed in the chair, as if the game had just begun.
âA battlefield, huh?â she said, playing with the spoon of her coffee. âWell, I like challenges. And chaotic places have their own charm if you know where to look.â Pamela let the phrase slide smoothly, like someone throwing a stone into a lake and waiting for the ripples.
Y/n couldnât shake the feeling that every word Pamela spoke carried a double meaning, but far from making her feel uncomfortable, it sparked something akin to contained laughter, as if they were sharing a private joke that she was just beginning to access.
âDonât you have plants at home?â Pamela suddenly asked, as if the question had sprung from the foam of her coffee.
âWell, there are a couple of cacti⌠and a fern that I think hates me,â Y/n replied. âBut I always forget to water them. Or I overwater them. Seriously, itâs like plants come to me already doomed.â
Pamela smiled, one of those slow smiles that seem to grow little by little, like a sprout deciding when the perfect moment to emerge into the light is.
âItâs not just about water, Y/n,â she said, with that voice that seemed to carry the calm of the wind and the weight of centuries of nature. âPlants need attention. Patience. Sometimes they just want to know youâre there, even if you donât say anything.â She paused, letting Y/nâs gaze get lost in her eyes. âSometimes, like people.â
Y/n felt a little shiver. It wasnât what Pamela was saying, but how she was saying it. There was something in her voice that disarmed her, as if every word had been calculated to penetrate a defense that Y/n hadnât even realized she had up. And then, almost without thinking, she let slip a truth she rarely shared.
âIâm not very good with people.â The confession came out of her mouth before she could stop it. She said it without drama, almost as if she were talking about the weather. But something in Pamela changed, barely perceptible, like a leaf moving without the wind touching it.
âReally?â Pamela asked softly, but without an ounce of pity. Just curiosity.
Y/n looked down for a moment, fiddling with the edge of her cup, before daring to continue.
âI grew up in a huge house, but⌠empty. My father⌠well, he was busy with his things. Business, parties, the usual. Shrugging it off, wanting to downplay it, even though inside she knew it wasnât something that could easily fade away. Alfred, the butler, raised me. And yes, he was amazing. But it was always just him and no one else. Itâs not the same as having⌠friends.â
Pamela listened in silence, but not in that awkward way where people listen just to see how you respond afterward. No, there was something in her attention that enveloped Y/n, as if she were giving her space to bare herself without fear of being judged.
âYou never had friends,â Pamela asserted more than asked.
Y/n shook her head.
âUntil now,â Pamela said, with that same softness that seemed to have become her trademark, and something in Y/nâs chest stirred, as if she had just heard the most important thing in the world.
There was a moment of silence, but it wasnât uncomfortable. It was a silence that somehow connected them. And then Pamela broke the spell, with a mischievous smile that lit everything up again.
âSo⌠are you going to let me be your first friend, or would you rather keep killing plants?â
Y/n couldnât help the laugh that escaped her lips, a sincere and liberating laugh, as if something inside her had broken an invisible chain. After all, it was clear that Pamela wasnât just another person passing through her life. There was something different about her, something that made the air feel lighter, that made the future seem less uncertain.
âWell, if you can survive the cactusâŚâ Y/n said, leaving the sentence unfinished, but knowing Pamela would understand.
And then, for the first time in a long time, Y/n felt that everything might be okay. That maybe, just maybe, Pamela Isley wasnât just a roommate, but the first person in a long time with whom she could imagine a less lonely future. She was already caught in that web, and the worst, or perhaps the best part, was that she didnât care at all.
Bruce Wayne was sitting in the mansion's garden on a gray afternoon that seemed to drag memories along like the wind drags fallen leaves. In his hands, a cup of black coffee, still steaming, its strong and bitter aroma mingling with the scent of damp earth after the rain. In front of him, on a small wrought-iron table, rested a piece of dark chocolate cake topped with melting strawberry ice cream, forming a pink puddle around it. But he found no pleasure in the view. It was more of a bitter symbol of a routine he once believed unbreakable.
In the garden, where the wilted flowers swayed gently, a little girl flitted about with contagious energy, as if the chill of the afternoon did not exist for her. Her laughter, so innocent and pure, filled the air, breaking the sepulchral silence that seemed to reign in that old home for a moment. She wore a pink dress with small white dots, an 80s style that would have been charming in another time but now seemed out of place with the scene. Her patent leather shoes shone as she ran back and forth, chasing her dolls.
In her small hands, she held action figures, one of the Batman her father portrayed and another of the Joker, his eternal rival. The girl, no older than six, organized her battles with adorable seriousness. In a high-pitched, mischievous voice, she brought the characters to life, staging an epic duel between hero and villain.
âYou wonât defeat me this time, Batman!â she exclaimed, raising the Joker figure with a malevolent laugh.
âI will stop you! I always do...â she replied with her other hand, giving voice to Batman, but with a childlike touch that contrasted with the darkness of the character.
Bruce watched the scene with a mix of tenderness and pain. He knew she wasnât really there, that this vision was nothing more than a distant echo of what never was. Y/n, his little Y/n, had vanished months ago. And he⌠he had never given her the love she deserved, always wrapped in his own shadows, in his endless struggle to protect a city that never rested.
The air felt thick, heavy with nostalgia and regret. The girl continued to play, laughing, talking to her dolls, oblivious to the weight of the years, to the loss. And Bruce, although he knew it was an illusion, couldnât look away; he couldnât stop imagining what it would have been like to give her what he never knew how to offer. What it would have been like to see her grow, to laugh more, to run through those gardens with the carefree spirit only childhood allows.
Suddenly, the sound of soft footsteps interrupted the daydream. Alfred appeared at the garden entrance, always elegant, always with that air of discretion and understanding that only he possessed. He approached slowly, placing a hand on Bruceâs shoulder as if he understood the pain that kept him trapped in that scene.
âMr. Wayneâ he said in a low voice, filled with compassion, âitâs time to come back.â
Bruce closed his eyes for a moment, letting Alfredâs words seep into his consciousness. He knew what they meant. He knew that girl, in her 80s dress and her dolls, was nothing but an idealized memory, a distorted reflection of what never was. Because Y/n wasnât like that. She didnât like those old dresses; she had always preferred the fashion of the 2000s, with its vibrant colors and comfortable clothes. And she never enjoyed the chocolate cake now sitting in front of him. She liked carrot cake, simple and sweet, but he had never paid attention to those details when he still could.
How did he know those little details about his daughter? Bruce often wondered. It wasnât because he had learned them by being close, because proximity had been a luxury he never allowed himself. No, those small fragments of her life he had discovered in the album that Alfred kept with an almost reverential discretion. That album was more than just an object; it was a silent refuge where Alfred had archived what the big house, always filled with shadows and echoes of footsteps that never came, had refused to hold.
The day the children learned of the albumâs existence marked the beginning of a chaos he still remembered with a mix of exasperation and a contained smile. They had decided, like little conspirators, that treasure belonged to them. A kind of all-out battle had ensued in the mansion, something that over time acquired the quality of family legends.
Bruce, standing in the study, could still see the sparkle in Damianâs eyes, the intensity, the almost playful fury with which he had taken that assault as a personal mission. Damian, with his perpetual impatience, had been the fiercest of all. He vividly remembered how his youngest son had burst into the room wielding two katanas, with the cold precision of a millennia-old warrior, even though his hands were still too small to fully grasp the handles.
âItâs mine!â Damian shouted, with that mix of stubbornness and vulnerability that only the youngest possess, as if he could cut not only the air but the very uncomfortable silence that always floated between them.
âIt belongs to all of us, Damianâ Bruce had tried to intervene, with that authoritative voice that, curiously, never managed to control his own children as he did with the chaos of the city.
But Damian wasnât listening. For him, the album was not just an object; it was a relic, a bridge to something he felt but couldnât name. His sister Y/n, so distant in daily life, was closer in those pages than in any superficial conversation they had ever had. She was his sister, but not enough. He wanted those photos, those notes that Alfred had kept, he wanted to understand what it was about her that slipped away from him daily.
Bruce watched from the threshold, not really intervening. He let the chaos unfold, as if it were necessary. The children fought, but it wasnât just for the album. They fought for something deeper, a kind of silent reclamation of what they had never been able to have: time, connection, perhaps even love. Alfred, from a corner, merely smiled with that quiet wisdom, knowing that those battles of childish katanas, of shouts and disputes over photos and notes, were actually the way they tried to find each other in a house full of absences.
Bruce sighed, remembering. Alfred had always known more than he did, always understood those invisible things that Bruce, no matter how much he wanted to, could never quite grasp. And so it was that he himself, at the end of it all, also ended up snooping in that album, with a silent curiosity he would never admit. There, in those carefully tended pages, he found his daughter. Or at least, he found the idea of her, the pieces of a life he hadnât shared but that, somehow, had always been present in those photos, in those little notes that Alfred, more of a father than he was, had kept with such love.
âShe wonât come back, Alfred... I lost her... maybe forever... â Bruce murmured, his voice barely audible, as if admitting it aloud would make her absence more realââand I⌠I was never there for her as I should have been.â
The old butler sighed, his tired eyes filled with infinite patience.
âItâs never too late to remember, sir. Itâs never too late to honor her memory in the right way.â
Bruce opened his eyes, looking again at the scene, but this time more clearly. The girl had disappeared.
The wind blew gently through the Wayne mansion's garden, carrying away the murmur of the dry leaves. Bruce remained motionless, as if the weight of the years, of the mistakes, had turned him into another statue in that landscape. The aroma of coffee had dissipated, and the cake before him remained untouched. Y/nâs figure still floated in his mind, her laughter like a distant echo that wouldnât fade but also wouldnât console him.
Alfred, with the patience only a father at heart could have, stood by his side, his firm hand on Bruceâs shoulder, as if in that gesture he could transmit strength to face the pain that gnawed at him.
âMr. Wayneâ Alfred began, his voice soft but laden with meaning, âthe kids have gone looking for Y/n again.â
Bruce closed his eyes, allowing those words to sink into his consciousness. He knew all the Robins and Batgirls had been following leads, searching for answers in the darkest corners of Gotham, but the emptiness he felt remained overwhelming. They had failed so many times⌠what did another attempt matter? The city, always hungry for its heroes, seemed more a trap than a cause.
âIt doesnât matter anymore, Alfredâ Bruce replied, his voice rough, worn down by years of struggle. âNone of this will change what happened. Y/n⌠is gone.â
âWith all due respect, sir,â Alfred interjected, this time with a firmer tone, âY/n is still out there. And as long as thereâs a single chance to find her, you cannot allow yourself to give up.â
Silence stretched between them. Bruceâs gaze remained fixed on some point in the garden, lost in thought. But Alfred, with his usual insight, knew he needed more than empty words to awaken him.
âThereâs something else,â Alfred added, taking a breath, âa new figure appeared last night during a robbery in the East District. They call her Kerosene. The White Bat. She was seen taking out a group of assailants in seconds.â
Bruce didnât react. Kerosene. The city had always generated figures willing to fill the void he had left every time he stepped away, every time Gotham lost the light of its vigilante. But this time, he didnât feel the urgency to learn more. What did it matter? He repeated to himself. Gotham already had its heroes.
âI donât careâ he murmured, his voice empty, as cold as the air surrounding the gardenââLet others deal with Gotham. Kerosene, the Joker, or whoever⌠the city doesnât need me anymore.â
Alfred tightened his grip on Bruceâs shoulder, almost like a father refusing to see his son give up. He stepped forward, and this time his voice was lower but more incisive.
âThis isnât about Gotham, sir,â he said with an intensity Bruce hadnât expectedââItâs about Y/n.â
Bruce lifted his gaze, his eyes finally meeting Alfredâs, as if those words had ignited a spark within him.
âIf you donât want to protect this city, do it for her â Alfred continuedââBecause you will find her, sir. Iâm sure of it. And when you do⌠how would you want her to find you? Destroyed? Defeated? No. You need to be ready, you need to be strong, for her. Wherever she is, Y/n is still waiting for her father.â
Bruce felt the pain in his chest intensify, a constant reminder of his failure, but Alfred was right. Y/n was somewhere out there. Alive or not, it didnât matter. What mattered was that as long as he didnât find her, he couldnât give up.
âThe kids have done everything they can to find her,â Alfred said, softening his toneââTheyâre still at it. Every day they search for new leads, explore new corners of Gotham⌠but thereâs only one man who can put everything in order. Thereâs only one father who can bring her back.â
The air tensed between them, and for the first time in a long time, Bruce felt a slight tremor inside. He remembered the moment he decided to become Batman, driven by the guilt and pain of losing his parents. Now, that same guilt, that same pain, called to him again, but this time, it wasnât for Gotham. It was for Y/n. His daughter.
âTell me, Alfred, who is this Kerosene?â Bruce murmured, finally reacting to the information Alfred had given him.
âYes, sir. Her abilities are astonishing, according to reports. Agile, fast⌠but her true identity remains a mystery. Some say sheâs just another vigilante trying to fill the void you left. But the important thing is that she is acting with lethal precision.â
Bruce stood slowly, leaving the cup of coffee on the table, already cold and forgotten. He looked at the empty garden, but this time, with a new determination blooming in his chest.
âIf this Kerosene is connected⌠if thereâs any link to Y/n, I will find out,â he said, his voice firmer, closer to the one Alfred had known for so many yearsââAnd if not⌠then Iâll find her myself.â
Alfred nodded, a mix of relief and satisfaction reflected on his face. He had managed to awaken the man Gotham needed, but more than that, he had awakened the father Y/n deserved.
â Very well, sir,he replied with a slight smile, always the unwavering servantââThe Batcave is ready for your return.â
Bruce turned toward the mansion, but not before glancing once more at the garden, where Y/nâs figure, so real in his mind, faded like morning mist.
Wherever you are, I will find you.
Richard âDickâ Grayson knocked forcefully on the old apartment door, the echo resonating in the narrow hallway of the building, where dust gathered in the corners like forgotten memories and the lights flickered as if trying to perform one last dance before going out. Beside him, Barbara Gordon, the commissioner's daughter, crossed her arms, staring at the door with an intensity that could have splintered the wood.
Jason Todd, restless to his left, kept his gaze fixed on the doorknob, his body tense, as if each passing second brought him one step closer to breaking through that wooden barrier. Above, on the roof, Red Robin, The Spoiler, and Batgirl waited, shadows in a world that seemed to ignore their pounding hearts, ready to act.
âI donât know why we always have to deal with the worst specimens of humanity,â Barbara murmured, adjusting her coat as she shot a sidelong glance at Dick, who seemed to have a plan in mind.
âBecause weâre lucky,â Jason replied, sarcasm lacing his words, a crooked smile on his lips that didnât quite fit the situation. âAnd when I say âlucky,â I mean weâre carrying someone else's karma because we⌠are screwed.â
Dick knocked on the door again, this time with more force. The echo reverberated through the hallways, a declaration of intent.
âWe should break it down. You know itâs not going to open just from a gentle knock,â Jason said, stepping forward, his intention clear and palpable.
âCalm down, Jason. Not all problems are solved with violence,â Barbara retorted, though a part of her knew that idea faded every time they found themselves in a situation like this.
âSure, as if we have another option. Do you want me to schedule a tea date instead of kicking down the door?â Jason frowned, the tension palpable.
Finally, a sound came from behind the door. Chains, the metallic echo of locks being unlatched with a maddening slowness, as if someone on the other side knew that every second of wait was boiling the blood of the three standing before the door. At last, the door opened just enough to reveal a face: the landlord. A short man with small eyes and a slimy smile that seemed to ooze like dirty oil through his yellowed teeth.
âWhat do you want?â he asked in a thick voice, looking at Dick with suspicion, but his gaze soon dropped to Barbara, lingering unpleasantly on her figure, and then to Jason, who had already tensed the muscles in his jaw.
âWeâre looking for Y/n Wayne L/n,â Dick said, trying to maintain his composure, the heat of anger threatening to overflow. âWe know she lives here. And we know you know where she is.â
The man let out a laugh under his breath, a rusty squeak that resonated like a heavy joke.
âAh, the pretty girl⌠yeah, yeah. And who are you all, huh?â he asked, his slimy tone sending chills that seemed to crawl over Dick's skin.
âItâs none of your concern. We just want to know where she is,â Barbara said, her voice firm and resolute, although the tension in her body betrayed her impatience.
The landlord tilted his head, like a cat playing with its prey, and smiled with a disturbing mischief.
âWell, if you havenât found her in five months, maybe you donât want to know,â he said, letting the words drop like stones in a pond, creating ripples of discomfort.
âI warn you, this isnât a game,â Jason interjected, his voice low and dangerous. âDonât make me remind you what can happen when a man plays with fire.â
The man shrugged, trying to appear unconcerned, although the glint in his eyes betrayed him.
Jason's hand rested near his belt, right where he kept his gun, and although he hadnât drawn the weapon yet, the threat was clear.
The landlord noticed but instead of being scared, he wore a repugnant smile, like a predator that had just spotted a wounded prey. His gaze shifted back to Barbara, and then, without the slightest respect, murmured something that made Dickâs fists clench.
âAh, Y/n... yeah, I remember her. She came around when she had just turned eighteen. Good material, if you catch my drift. She looked innocent, but... those are the most interesting ones, right?â The man's gaze darkened, scanning Barbara again, as if evaluating merchandise.
âSay that again,â Jason growled, drawing his gun in a motion so quick that the landlord barely had time to blink before feeling the cold barrel pressed against his forehead. âAnd I swear Iâll blow your brains out right here.â
The words hung in the air, sharp, loaded with contempt and a lust that twisted like a snake inside him.
The man let out a cynical chuckle, relishing the moment.
âThe last time I saw pretty Y/n was a while back. I donât know what sheâs up to now, but I kept some pictures of her and her friend.â His tone was defiant, almost mocking.
Rage was bubbling in Jason. His fists were clenched, a deadly spark in his eyes.
âWhat did you say?â His voice trembled between anger and control, like a string about to snap.
The landlord, feeling invincible, continued. âI donât know if theyâre lesbians, but seeing them together was quite the spectacle. Both of them were hot, you know?â
Jason could no longer hold back. The anger erupted like a volcano.
âShut up!â he shouted, and the sound echoed like a gunshot in the tense silence that had invaded the room.
Before the landlord could react, Jason pulled his gun, aiming with precision.
âIâm going to give you one chance. Tell me where Y/n is. Now.â
The manâs laughter faded, his eyes widening in shock. âWait, wait, thereâs no need toâŚâ
âWHERE?!â Jason's voice thundered, firm and filled with rage, like a storm rumbling in the atmosphere.
The tension became palpable, the air thick with promises of violence.
âAlright, alright!â the landlord stammered, but Jasonâs voice turned even colder.
âIâm not going to ask again.â
âShe just left for work at night and thatâs itâŚâ he started to say, but Jason could no longer hear. The man had photos of Y/n. Compromising, crude, and that simple mention ignited hell in his chest.
In an instant, the sound of an explosion resonated in the hallway, and the man fell to the ground, his silly smile erased by the terror that had overtaken his face. Blood gushed forth in a dark torrent, staining the floor and nearby walls.
Barbara covered her mouth in shock, while Dick stood frozen, stunned.
âJason!â she exclaimed, but the image of the landlord lying on the ground with his vacant stare was etched in her mind.
Jason holstered the weapon, his breath rapid and uncontrolled. He had crossed a line, and in that moment, he realized there was no turning back. Anger had found a way to break free, but at a terrible cost.
âI wonât let anyone hurt Y/n again,â he murmured, his eyes filled with determination. No one else would stand in his way to find her, no matter the price he had to pay.
The room was saturated with the echo of the gunshot, and the silence grew heavy, almost palpable. Barbara took a deep breath, the anger sparking in her eyes as she looked at Jason, who still seemed dazed by the act he had committed.
âWhat the hell were you thinking?â she said, her voice contained but sharp as a blade. âThatâs why we didnât bring Damian along, because he would have gone off just the same, but in a much more reckless way.â Her gaze fixed on the corpse, lying in a pool of blood, a scene that could have come from the mind of a disturbed artist.
Jason, with his chest heaving and jaw clenched, simply shrugged.
âI couldnât just stand by. He knew something, and I wasnât about to let it slip away.â The fervor in his voice didnât hide the confusion that was beginning to seep in, like the cold of the night creeping through the windows.
Barbara didnât respond, but the silence that filled the room grew even denser when the others entered, alarmed by the gunshot. Tim, Stephanie, and Cass arrived, their expressions filled with concern that quickly transformed into indignation.
âWhat happened here?â Tim asked, his eyes widening at the scene. Blood slid across the floor like a dark river, and the landlordâs body faded beneath the flickering light.
âAre you crazy, Jason?!â Steph exclaimed, disbelief palpable in her voice.
Cass crouched down, her expression grave as she looked at the fallen man. She didnât need to speak to convey her disapproval; every glance said more than a thousand words.
âIt doesnât matter how we got here,â Dick intervened, his authoritative tone trying to restore order. âWe need answers. Letâs investigate.â
With a determined movement, Barbara approached the body, while Jason still breathed irregularly, as if the weight of his actions began to settle on him. Barbara looked around; the apartment was a dusty and sad place, filled with shadows that seemed to whisper secrets.
As the others searched, Tim found a series of photos pinned to the walls, each one showing Y/n and other women from the area, frozen laughter in time, trapped between moments that should have been happy. However, there was something unsettling about the way they were arranged, a disorder that seemed a declaration of possession.
âLook at this,â Tim said, pointing to the images. There was Y/n, always smiling, but next to her was a figure that couldnât be ignored. The silhouette of Pamela Isley, better known as Poison Ivy, stood beside her, her red hair like a fire that seemed to consume the sadness of the place.
âPamelaâŚâ Cass murmured, her voice almost a whisper. âSheâs been in Arkham for three months.â
Barbara moved closer, examining the photos more closely. âThis is more complicated than we thought. Ivy has been involved, and that changes everything.â
Jason, still trying to comprehend the chaos he had unleashed, ran a hand through his hair. âIt doesnât matter. Weâll find Y/n. I donât care what I have to do.â
Barbara looked at him, her expression one of challenge but also understanding. âWe canât do this recklessly. We have to be smart. Silent.â
The group nodded, realizing that the road ahead would be filled with dangers, but also promises of redemption. They were all willing to kill for Y/n, but they had to do it quietly, like shadows slipping through the streets at night.
âListen, weâre going to find her,â Dick said, his voice resonating like a mantra. âNo matter how many doors we have to break down, how many truths we have to drag into the light.â
And so, in the echo of the silence that followed the violence, the five united in a tacit pact, intertwining their destinies in the search for Y/n. Each lost in their thoughts, each remembering that shadows sometimes have the power to conceal not only secrets but also the light that clings to hope.
The shadows stretched as they moved away from the apartment, leaving behind the vestige of a dead man and the echo of trapped laughter. The search had begun, and Y/nâs fate hung in the balance, a thread of light in the darkness that promised to bloom amid the ruins of despair.
The city lights flickered in the distance, like lost stars in the asphalt.
The tears of Y/n fell onto the slippery ground, forming puddles that blended with the blood, a dark ruby staining every part of her thin body, as if sins were being tattooed onto her skin. The humidity of the place smelled of iron and fear, of broken promises and a destiny she had chosen but didnât quite know how to accept.
âIt doesnât feel good, little one?â said the Doctor, his voice a bitter whisper echoing off the damp walls of the room. He, with his dirty blonde hair falling messily over his forehead, wore a white coat that looked more like a rag than a symbol of authority. A cynical smile spread across his lips, revealing teeth that seemed sharper than the fate he had designed for her. âBathing in the blood of enemies, isnât it an exquisite pleasure?â
Y/n, her gaze lost at a point on the floor, nodded slowly, as if each movement cost her an eternity. The blood, warm and sticky, slid between her fingers, a sensory experience that drowned her in contradictions. On one hand, there was a dark delight in the power that image conferred upon her, a power she had learned to wield. But on the other hand, there was an abyss of pain threatening to consume her.
âItâsâŚâ she whispered, barely able to form words. Her voice trembled like a leaf in autumn, indecision etched in her features. Guilt suffocated her, and each tear that fell was a reminder of what she had lost, of what she had left behind.
âWhat is it?â asked the Doctor, leaning toward her, his eyes lit by a glow that was not exactly compassion, but rather a cruel satisfaction. His gaze seemed to pierce through the layers of her being, scrutinizing the dark corners of her soul. âIs it pleasure you feel, or is it fear?â
Y/n recoiled, feeling her skin burn under his gaze. The Doctorâs words tangled in her mind, forming a knot that seemed impossible to untie. Her voice, almost a cry for help, resonated in the air.
âI donât know! I donât know if itâs pleasure or pain.â The words shot out like arrows, but only managed to embed their tips in the empty air, finding no destination. She trembled, caught between repulsion and the desire to free herself from the invisible chains that kept her anchored in that place.
The Doctor let out a cold laugh, as if he were enjoying the spectacle unfolding before him. With a careless gesture, he threw another bucket of blood onto the floor, creating a small puddle that slid toward Y/n.
âThat is the beauty of your situation, my dear. You have been chosen to cleanse Gotham of the scum, and along the way, you will discover that pain and pleasure are two sides of the same coin.â
âChosen?â replied Y/n, her voice shaking with the fierce mix of disbelief and rage. âChosen for what? To be your puppet?â
The Doctor stepped closer, letting the distance between them fade. His presence was oppressive, like a shadow that swallowed light.
âYou are not a puppet, Keroseneâ he said, pronouncing her name as if caressing it. âYou are the spark that can ignite the revolution. The tears that fall now are the ashes of the old you, and itâs time you embrace what awaits you.â
Y/n felt the air grow dense, as if the Doctorâs words were trying to envelop her, to convince her. But there was a truth in his voice, an echo of what she had longed for deep within her being. Hadnât she been searching for purpose, a place to belong?
âNo⌠I donât want to be what youâve made me.â she said, though her voice sounded more hesitant than determined. It was as if reality slipped around her, like the slippery ground she stood on.
âOf course you do, Y/n.â He smiled, and there was something unsettling in that smile, something that made her feel she was on the brink of a revelation. âYour pain is the echo of the city, and you, little one, can be its savior.â
The Doctorâs words resonated in her mind, and Y/n felt herself teetering on the edge of the abyss, the possibility of becoming Kerosene, the force of vengeance and power. She fought against the idea, but there was a part of her that was beginning to awaken, to open like a flower in the desert.
âSo, what do I have to do?â she asked, finally facing the reality that surrounded her. The tears, instead of being a sign of weakness, now seemed a recognition of her new identity.
The Doctor looked at her with a mix of satisfaction and complicity, like a teacher who sees the spark of greatness in his student.
âFirst, you must accept that the past does not define your future. The blood that surrounds you is only the first step toward freedom. Become what you have always been. Your destiny is to burn, and in doing so, illuminate others.â
Y/n felt the weight of her decision slowly fading away. By accepting her destiny, she had found a new way to free herself, a purpose that shone like fire.
âThen I will do it.â she said, her voice now firm and resonant, as if she were finally embracing the darkness that had always dwelled within her. âI will be Kerosene.â
The Doctor smiled, and in that smile lay a world of possibilities. Together, they could shake the foundations of Gotham.
âThatâs right, my dear Kerosene.â He stepped back, allowing his figure to fade into the shadows..âAnd remember, every decision you make will be a step toward glory or toward downfall. The line is thin, and you are destined to cross it.â
âWhat about them?â Y/n asked, pointing to the shadows surrounding her, referring to the Waynes who remained silent in their luxurious prison of silence. âWhere is Batman?â
The Doctor paused, his gaze turning serious and contemplative.
âSince your appearance, the Waynes have become shadows of what they once were. Batman has vanished, as if fear has locked him in his own game. They donât want you to know the truth, and I wonder if, deep down, he fears what you are capable of.â
âFears?â repeated Y/n, incredulity splattering her voice like a rain of dead stars. âWhy?â
âBecause the truth is that there is no longer space for the good in this city.â The Doctor stepped closer, his tone low but filled with fervor. âSoon you will go after the Court of Owls. We will expose those monsters in the streets, as they deserve, and they will have no one to defend them. Not even their beloved bat.â
A chill ran down Y/n's spine. The idea of stepping out into the night, of facing the villains who had ravaged her city, filled her with a strange power. She remembered Pamela, laughing amidst the shadows, her voice like an echo urging her to fight.
âI will not be their puppet. I do not want to be a pawn in a bigger game.â The words erupted from her with the force of an approaching storm, and the vision of Pamela dancing among the flowers filled her with a sudden sweetness.
âYou will not be a pawn, Kerosene.â The Doctor smiled, and in his eyes was an air of admiration. âYou are the queen in this game. Your vengeance will not only bring down those villains, but it will also seek the man behind the mask of Batman. We need to end him.â
âEnd him?â The question hung in the air like a trembling whisper. Her heart stopped for an instant, remembering the nights spent with Batman, the unspoken words, the caresses of an absent father.
âYes. Because he, like them, has become a legend that needs to fall.â
Y/n felt the darkness looming over her, a shadow whispering promises of power and pain. But there was something more, a spark igniting within her, a fire burning with the strength of a new dawn.
âThen I will do it.â said Y/n, her voice resonating with a clarity that surprised her. âI will expose the Court of Owls and make my father see.â
The Doctor watched Y/n with palpable satisfaction, as if he had finally ignited a spark deep within her being. With a gesture of his hand, he made the invisible shackles that kept her trapped fade away. In that moment, a strange freedom slipped over her skin, a freedom laden with dark responsibility.
âCome, Kerosene.â he said, his voice now a hypnotic chant rising among the shadows. âThere is something you need to see.â
He led her through a labyrinth of damp hallways, each step resonating like an echo of past decisions. The walls seemed to whisper forgotten secrets, tales of those who had fallen into the abyss before her. As they advanced, the light of day faded, and the gloom became an accomplice to their thoughts.
Finally, they reached the balcony of the building, a place where time had stopped its march. The Doctor gently pushed Y/n toward the railing, forcing her to look out over the vast expanse of Gotham that stretched before them. The city was a canvas of flickering lights and deep shadows, a portrait of intertwined chaos and order.
âLook, little one.â the Doctor whispered, his voice wrapping around her like a veil of mystery. âThis is your city, a monster that feeds on the secrets you hold in your chest. The blood that stains your skin is a symbol of the struggle that lies ahead.â
Y/n leaned over the edge of the balcony, feeling the cold wind caress her bare skin. The city glimmered like a sea of dying stars, each light a story, each shadow a whisper of betrayal. The vision enveloped her, and for a moment, she felt like a spectator of her own destiny.
Her bare skin, still stained with blood, prickled at the chill of Gotham, a freezing breeze sneaking through the cracks of crumbling buildings, as if the city itself reminded her that she was alive, that darkness embraced her with its mantle of forgetfulness and despair. Each small contact of the air made her more aware of her vulnerability, and at the same time, of the power that blossomed from within her. It was a reminder that, amidst chaos, she was the spark of a new flame.
The puddles of blood that had stained her skin, silent witnesses to her transformation, shone like a dark ruby under the dim light of the moon. In that moment, each drop was an echo of past decisions, a symbol of the life she had left behind. And yet, in her mind, the Doctor's words echoed: âYou are the spark that can ignite the revolution.â The irony of her state wrapped her in a sweet and bitter confusion; deep down, her nakedness felt like a release.
The city stretched before her, a vast ocean of twinkling lights and lurking shadows. Gotham, in its complexity, seemed to breathe, a living being pulsing with stories of pain and longing. The streetlights flickered as if about to go out, and Y/n felt that each flicker was a whisper calling her, a reminder that she was destined to be part of something much larger than herself.
As she gazed at the horizon, her mind filled with images: the faces of those she had lost, those she had loved, and those she had to confront. Her heart wrestled between the desire for vengeance and the longing for redemption.
âWhat do you see?â asked the Doctor, his eyes shining with an unsettling intensity.
âI seeâŚâ Y/n began, but the words slipped away like sand through her fingers. The city was a labyrinth of emotions, a stage where pain and pleasure intertwined in a macabre dance. It was a reflection of her own internal struggle, her desire for vengeance and her yearning for redemption.
âI see a sea of shadows, a stage where illusions collapse like houses of cards.â she finally replied, her voice echoing. âEach light, a hope; each shadow, a whisper of unhappiness.â
âPerfect.â The Doctor smiled, his face illuminated by an almost fraternal satisfaction. âGotham is a mirror, and you are the light that can break the darkness. You must be able to see beyond what shines.â
The Doctorâs words resonated in her mind, tearing through the veil of confusion that enveloped her. In that instant, Y/n understood that every tear shed had fed the city, that every drop of blood on her hands was an echo of what she had lost. And yet, vengeance offered her a new purpose, a path into the unknown.
âThe city cries for change, for a fire to purify itâ she whispered, her voice gaining strength in the night breeze. âAnd I⌠I am that fire.â
âThatâs right, dear.â The Doctor nodded, a mix of pride and malice in his expression. âThe fire that will purify Gotham and, in its wake, consume everything that stands in your way.â
Y/n felt the air fill with electricity, a palpable current connecting her to the city, to its pain and desire. Deep within her, something began to change. She was no longer just a puppet; she was no longer merely the shadow of her past. She was Kerosene, the spark that would ignite the flame of change.
âBut, Doctor, what about those who love the darkness?â she asked, her voice now an echo of what she had learned. âWhat if they cling to their shadow?â
The Doctor stepped closer to her, his penetrating gaze filled with complicity.
âDarkness is a possessive lover, but there is always a price to pay. The truth is that they cannot hold onto it forever. And when the fire burns, only those ready to be reborn will be saved.â
Y/n felt a mixture of anguish and determination. The city before her became a symbol of her internal struggle, a stage where light and shadow intertwined in an eternal game. Every street, every building, every corner whispered her name in a song of warning and challenge.
âAnd when the fire consumes everything in its path, will there be anything left of me?â she asked, her voice trembling with the fragility of a leaf in the wind.
The Doctor smiled, a smile that seemed to mock the questions still dancing in her mind.
âPerhaps, dear Kerosene, you will find yourself in the act of burning. Or maybe, you will fade into the ash. That is the enigma of transformation: in the fire, death is merely the prelude to a new beginning.â
As she gazed at the city, Y/n felt her identity fragment and fuse, in an endless cycle of creation and destruction. The image of Gotham before her became a metaphor for the human soul, a reflection of the struggles everyone faced in the darkness. The city, with its chaos and its heartbreaking beauty, enveloped her like a hug.
With one last look at the flickering lights and lurking shadows, Y/n stepped back, a firm decision rising within her.
âThereâs no turning back nowâ she murmured, her voice an echo of her new reality. âI will be the fire that illuminates this eternal night.â
The Doctor, with a gesture of approval, retreated into the shadows, leaving her alone in her revelation. As the city spread before her, a mantle of mystery and power, Y/n knew that the true journey was just beginning. The line between fire and ash was thin, and in her chest burned the certainty that by crossing it, nothing would ever be the same.
âSo be it, Keroseneâ she said to herself as the wind enveloped her in secret whispers. âLet the fire speak in your name and let the night receive your lament.â
And looking at Gotham, she understood that, in the end, her destiny was not merely to be a spectator, but an unstoppable force, a storm that would unleash chaos. And so, with her heart beating to the rhythm of the city, she prepared to embrace her truth, her fire.
â
A/N â Here is the long-awaited third part of this series. Thank you for all the support and love you have given me. I decided to make this part longer (at the cost of not being able to include the last image :( ) so that you can enjoy it more.
I was reading your comments where you were asking if Y/n and the Doctor would have a romance (which horrifies me a bit :d, but it gave me an idea) or if he performed a lobotomy on her. Well, that will be answered in the next part or in a headcanon, whatever you ask me.
By the way, in the tag list, there are some users I couldn't add, sorry about that đ. I really appreciate your understanding and patience. Your enthusiasm keeps me motivated to keep creating and sharing these stories. I hope you find this installment engaging and that it brings you the excitement and emotions youâve come to expect from the series. Enjoy!
Don't hesitate to ask me anything if you want.
take a bath!
Tag list! â â @amber-content @toast-on-dandelioms @feral-childs-word @sweetconnoisseurgardener @victoria1676 @toasted-cat18 @nosyrobin @beeaskewwrites @yandere-enthusiast @telltaletoad @dhanyasri @vanessa-boo @m3vl0vesu @jellypotato66 @midnightgrimoire @cherryxxxxyoongi @imnotdumbimstupif @plsfckmedxddy @h0neysiba @mybones537 @erikasurfer @sheepintherain @pix-stuff @yan-rai @uniquecutie-puffs @arlandvery @theblonde777 @alishii
@maicenitas @ti-girl1226 @vanilliona @chickenwings435 @thedramabrotherss @bat1212 @imnotdumbimstupif @somebodyrandom-613 @aelxr @jsprien213 @sheepintherain @lovebug-apple @zenychwan @starsdotalk @holylonelyponyeatingmacaron @misdollface @clementinesyummy @bunbunboysworld @lunaluz432 @kiarst @meowmeeps @adeptusxia0 @mettatons-number-1fan @fairygardenprincesss @nervousalpacalady @mottysith
Inspiration: @acid-ixx with his Again & Again series, @gotham-daydreams ' work, @i-cant-sing's work and @klemen-tine's work, be sure to check them out!
#yandere batboys#fem reader#x reader#dc x reader#yan blog#yandere#yandere batman#yandere bruce wayne#yandere damian wayne#yandere dc#yandere dick grayson#yandere jason todd#yandere red robin#yandere red hood#yandere robin#yandere alfred pennyworth#yandere x reader#reader insert#yandere batfamily#yandere batfam#neglect#neglected reader
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