#i honestly can't stop looking @ these they are so good

[allllium]

Jason Todd x childhood friend fem

fluff and potential angst

Jason runs into childhood friend from befor he died and she recognizes him

Back in Time

[ Jason Todd x Childhood Best Friend!Reader ]

~ Fluff, Maybe a little hurt/comfort, WC: 1,089

~ I'm so sorry this took so long 😭 Every time I went to write this it's like all ideas flew out of my head, but I finally got it done and I hope it meets your expectations<3

"Jason?"

He freezes.

He wasn't expecting to hear your voice today.

He wasn't expecting to hear your voice ever again.

Once he came back, you were gone.

He would say he tried to look for you but that isn't true. He thought your leaving was the universe telling him to leave you alone.

But now you're here. You're here and you recognize him. He doesn't know how to respond. He knows you know he heard you, otherwise he wouldn't have stopped moving.

The first thing he hears in your voice is the sadness. Not anger like he would've expected. Not even a hint of confusion. Just something sad.

After a minute of him being unmoving, clearly lost in his thoughts, he felt a tap on his shoulder.

"Jason." You say.

This time it's not a question.

After he hears you a second time, he brings himself to turn around and look at you.

"Hey."

"Hey." He can't tell if you're about to cry or smile.

"I'm sorry." He immediately apologizes. Maybe for leaving or maybe for not finding you. He's not quite sure.

"For what?" You ask and take a deep breath.

He sees the way tears form in your eyes and has the strange urge to cry himself.

"I don't know. I just feel like I need to."

"You don't. Dick told me what happened. That's not something you need to be sorry for." You say it so surely he doesn't know how to respond.

"I was gonna find you."

"That's not your job. I mean a phone call would've been nice." You shrug and let out a small, awkward chuckle.

"I didn't know what to do." He tells you quietly.

"I would assume." You look around the sidewalk you're on. You're standing in front of what looks like a busy shop, people walk in and out every couple seconds.

"Where did you go?" He asks you after a moment. Probably to determine whether or not he could've found you.

"I was here. I mean I stayed in Gotham just not where I was before."

"If I had known you were so close I would've gone to you but when they told you left I assumed-"

"Jason, you don't have to defend yourself." You cut him off quickly, "If I died and came back the last thing on my list would be finding someone who left."

He nods. "This might be easier if you were at least a little mad." He smiles softly at you, watching more tears shine in your eyes.

"I missed you too much to be mad right now."

He goes to say something back but someone walking by bumps into your shoulder.

"Maybe we should get coffee or something?" He suggests, not wanting to keep blocking the sidewalk traffic.

"Are you free?"

"Oh yeah, yeah." Dick can wait, he thinks to himself.

"Then yeah, coffee sounds great."

You both walk into the coffee shop and order whatever drinks sound good. Jason chooses a table against the wall and by a giant window.

You sit awkwardly in silence as you both try and think of what to say.

"How are you doing?" You ask, after multiple minutes of nothing.

"I'm okay, I think." He shrugs and takes a sip of his drink. You take notice of his fingers tapping nervously along the side of the cup.

"That's good." You nod and sigh.

"How are you?"

"I've been better." You answer honestly. Your fingers also tap nervously along your cup.

"I'm sorry. I don't know why this is so weird."

You laugh at his words, "I do. It's been a while."

"And I'm guessing we've both changed." He smiles.

"Changed? No shit Jason, look at you." You smile at him in a reassuring way. You can clearly see how dying has changed him.

"Yeah I guess I did get a little taller." He jokes and shakes his head.

"Maybe just an inch or two." You play along, laughing as you speak.

"I missed this. I missed you." He tells you with a sudden seriousness in his tone.

"Well good thing it isn't going away this time." You reach across the table and grab his hand.

It was never unusual for you and Jason to be touchy. That's just the kinda friendship you had. But this feels different.

Instead of being a friendly touch between best friends, it's more like a reassurance that's he's actually alive. A piece of you feels relief that you're not imagining this.

"I really hope so." He wishes with a frown.

"It won't. If you think I'm leaving your side anytime soon you're very very wrong."

"What's one more person to the gang that follows me everywhere?" He laughs again and squeezes your hand. It's the first time he's felt so free to last in a while.

"Where is that gang by the way? I would've expected one of them to be here by now."

"Oh I left while they weren't looking. I needed time to myself."

"You snuck out? Jason, they're probably panicking." You scold him softly.

"It's fine I'm meeting with Dick later."

You shake your head in disapproval but a smile on your face gives you away once again.

For some reason no matter how sad you are, a smile can't leave your lips.

You fall back into a silence but this time it's not awkward at all. It's a comfortable silence that reminds you of old times.

"I should probably get going. Dick will be pissed if I'm late."

"Yeah I don't doubt it." You recall the many times Dick has given long lectures about being late to anything he's involved in.

"I'll call you." He swears, standing up from his seat at the table.

"You better. I know where to find you." You stand up as well and finish off your drink.

"Yes you do." He agrees but doesn't leave.

You stand together in front of your table. Both of you are waiting for the other to move first.

Just as you're about to make the move to leave he steps forward and pulls you into a hug.

You immediately hug back and feel the tears reappear in your eyes.

"I really missed you." He whispers.

"I really missed you too." You whisper back.

You savor every moment of the embrace. Not wanting to leave out of fear that he would leave again.

But as you watch him walk away to meet with his brother, you're overcome with the happiness of knowing your best friend is here.

[louisaskywalkerani]

Beneath Your Touch

Pairing : Anakin Skywalker x f!Reader

synopsis : Basically, its your first time. Thats all.

CW : 18+, smut! minors DNI. vaginal fingering | p in v | unprotected sex

an : So, here’s the thing—this is about two people who can't keep their hands off each other (shocking, I know). It’s messy, a little awkward, and honestly, way too intense, but hey, what else would you expect? Anyway, hope you didn’t fall asleep halfway through. Or maybe you did? Who knows. Let me know what you think, or don’t.

As you hear the door creaking open, you jolt up in bed, blinking at the sound. Your mind races—who could it be this early? Only one person comes to mind. It’s Anakin. You rub your eyes groggily, swing your feet to the cold floor, and shuffle to the door. 

You open it a crack, just enough to peek through. There he stands, his dark Jedi robes sweeping the ground, looking like something out of a dramatic holodrama. His brows are furrowed, lips set in a deep frown, and his whole posture screams exhaustion. It’s kind of unsettling, seeing him like this when he’s usually so confident, practically oozing swagger. 

"Ani..." you whisper, still half-asleep but feeling that familiar rush of affection. "You’re back."

He locks eyes with you, his gaze filled with so much emotion it makes your stomach flip. "Hey, angel," he murmurs, stepping closer. "Sorry for waking you up so early. I just... I couldn’t wait any longer."

Your heart skips a beat, and you don’t even try to hide the smile creeping up. "It’s okay, come in." You grab his hand and pull him inside, shutting the door behind him. "How was the mission?"

He lets out a heavy sigh, running a hand through his messy hair. "Intense. Lots of fighting, lots of stress." He pauses, his blue eyes finding yours again, this time burning with something deeper. "But I’m here now. And I missed you so fucking much."

Before you can even respond, he’s pulling you into a crushing hug. You melt against him, inhaling his familiar scent, that mix of something warm and earthy that’s just so him. "I missed you too," you mumble into his chest. "So much."

You stay like that, wrapped up in each other, and it feels like time stops for a moment. But then you start noticing how every inch of him feels pressed up against you, and your body reacts almost immediately. That familiar warmth starts pooling between your legs, and you find yourself pressing closer, like you can’t get enough of him.

Anakin seems to catch on quickly—of course, he does. His hands start roaming over your body, squeezing and caressing like he’s memorizing every curve all over again. "Fuck, I want you so bad," he groans, his lips finding your neck and nipping at your skin. You can’t help but shiver because damn, he knows exactly what he’s doing.

"I want to make you feel good, baby. Let me worship this beautiful body of yours," he whispers, his voice low and breathy, and you have to bite back a sarcastic Oh, please do, because really, you’re not about to ruin the moment.

He trails soft, teasing kisses along your jaw and down your neck, making you shudder. His large hands slide under your thin nightgown, palming your breasts and brushing his thumbs over your nipples. They harden instantly, and you gasp as he tweaks them gently, sending a shockwave straight to your core.

"Ani..." you whimper, your voice coming out breathy as you arch into his touch. "Please..."

He chuckles against your skin, the sound rumbling through you and making you shiver even more. "Please what, angel? Tell me what you want," he teases, like he doesn’t already know exactly what you’re craving.

You flush a little, suddenly feeling shy despite how desperately you’ve been wanting this. "I... I want you to touch me more. Everywhere," you whisper, meeting his eyes with a half-pleading, half-smoldering look. "I’ve been thinking about your hands on me the whole time you were gone."

Anakin’s grin widens, turning wicked. "Oh, have you now?" he purrs, giving your nipples a firmer pinch that has you gasping. "Don’t worry, I’m going to touch you so good." 

He doesn’t waste any more time, pushing your nightgown up and over your head, tossing it aside without a second thought. You shiver under his heated gaze, feeling exposed but *so* aroused it doesn’t even matter. His eyes rake over your body like he’s savoring every inch.

"Fucking perfect," he growls, his hands gliding down your sides to your hips. He hooks his fingers into your panties, dragging them down your legs agonizingly slowly, his mouth following the path. It’s the kind of thing that would make you roll your eyes if it weren’t so hot.

He settles between your thighs, parting your folds with his fingers, and you’re already squirming, hips lifting in anticipation. "Ani, please..." you beg, rocking your hips as if that’ll make him move faster. "I need it. I need you."

He just grins like the smug bastard he can be and swipes his tongue over your clit, making you cry out and fist his hair. "Shh, just relax, baby," he coos, circling the sensitive bud with the tip of his tongue like he’s got all the time in the world. "Let me take care of you."

And as much as you want to retort with something sarcastic, you’re too busy being completely undone by the way his mouth feels on you, the pleasure building higher with every flick of his tongue.

He works you open with long, slow licks, occasionally dipping his tongue inside your tight entrance. And wow, the taste of you seems to explode on his tongue because he groans like he’s just tasted the best dessert ever. It’s almost embarrassing how good he is at this—like, did he take a course or something? He grips your thighs, spreading you wider as he delves deeper, gently tongue fucking you, and you can’t help but think, Of course, he’s amazing at this too. Typical.

"That's it, angel," he murmurs against your slick folds. "Let me in. Gonna make you feel so good." His voice is all low and raspy, like he knows exactly what he’s doing to you. 

You writhe beneath him, hands fisting the sheets because you genuinely can't handle this. Your brain is short-circuiting, and it's like you’re experiencing this for the first time (well, okay, you kind of are, but still). The intense sensations are so overwhelming it almost feels unfair. Anakin's down there like he’s got nowhere else to be, licking and sucking until you're a complete mess, your hips practically bucking against his face on their own. 

"Ani, I... I'm gonna-“ you gasp out, that familiar tingling deep in your core making itself known. And, of course, he just doubles down, sucking on your clit like he’s trying to win some kind of award. 

Two fingers slip inside your tight heat, curling just right to stroke your g-spot, and that’s it—you’re done. You come with a sharp cry, your back arching off the bed as your walls clench around his fingers. It’s intense and overwhelming, like he just flipped a switch inside you. 

He doesn’t even stop—no, he keeps going, licking at you through your orgasm like he’s trying to make you see stars. By the time he’s done, you’re trembling all over, the overstimulation making you so sensitive you could scream. He presses these soft, tender kisses to your inner thighs before crawling up your body with this stupidly proud grin on his face.

"You did so well, baby," he says, capturing your lips in a deep kiss. You can taste yourself on his tongue, and it’s kind of hot but also kind of mortifying. "Now I’m going to make you come on my cock," he adds, like it’s the most casual thing in the world.

He positions himself at your entrance, the thick head nudging against your slick folds, and you suddenly freeze up, feeling a wave of nerves. "Wait, Ani-“

He stops immediately, looking down at you with genuine concern. It’s almost sweet, really. "What’s wrong, angel?"

"I just… It’s my first time..." you admit softly, feeling a little vulnerable and pretty much embarrassed.

His eyes widen, and you can see the realization dawn on his face. “Fuck baby, I’m so sorry, I didn’t realize..." He cups your cheek, stroking your skin with his thumb. "We don’t have to do this if you’re not ready. I would never hurt you." 

And for a moment, it’s almost enough to make you forget he was just eating you out like he was starving a second ago.

"No, I want to," you assure him, reaching down to stroke his length. The nerves are there, sure, but the trust is too. "I trust you, Ani. I want my first time to be with you." And there it is—you said it out loud, hoping it doesn’t sound as awkward as it feels in your head.

He looks relieved, like he was holding his breath. "Okay, we'll go slow. If anything hurts, we stop, alright?" He’s all serious, like this is a contract negotiation, but honestly, it’s kind of sweet.

You nod, heart pounding in your chest, a mix of anticipation and nerves making your skin tingle. Anakin kisses you deeply, like he’s trying to pour every ounce of love and devotion he has into it. It’s a little overwhelming, but in a good way. Then he starts to push inside, slow and careful, and you kind of appreciate that he’s taking his time. 

You tense up as he breaches your entrance, a sharp sting making you gasp. It’s not unbearable, but it definitely doesn’t feel amazing either. Anakin immediately stops, his forehead pressed to yours, whispering, "Breathe, baby. You're doing so good." 

You take a deep breath, trying to relax. It’s almost funny how you’re practically giving yourself a pep talk in your head, like Come on, body, get it together. He resumes his slow advance, inch by inch sliding deeper inside you, and when he finally bottoms out, he stays still. It’s like he’s letting you take your time to adjust, which is nice, but also, who knew this would be so... full?

"How do you feel, angel?" he asks softly, brushing a stray piece of hair off your face. You can tell he’s genuinely concerned, and it’s oddly comforting.

"Full," you whisper, marveling at the sensation. It’s not something you can easily describe, but it’s a lot. "You’re... really big." The words slip out before you can stop them, and you can’t help but cringe a little at how cliché it sounds. 

He chuckles against your neck, clearly amused. "You’re taking me so well. So tight and perfect." His voice is low and husky, and you can’t decide if you want to roll your eyes or melt into him.

He starts to move, pulling out slowly before easing back in, setting a gentle rhythm. It’s almost annoyingly sweet how careful he’s being. Like, I get it—you’re trying to be nice. But as the slow, steady thrusts start to build up, the sparks of pleasure begin to spread through your body, and okay, maybe the slow pace is a good thing after all.

You cling to him, your nails digging into his back as you instinctively rock your hips to meet his. The feelings are overwhelming, so much more intense than you expected. You’re teetering right on the edge, and you can barely think straight. 

"Ani, I think... I think I’m gonna..." you pant, your walls starting to flutter around him. It’s kind of hilarious how fast this is happening, but also, it’s not like you’re going to stop it.

"That’s it, baby. Come for me. I’ve got you," he encourages, and you can hear the strain in his voice, like he’s barely holding on himself.

With a final, deep thrust, you shatter, your vision going white as ecstasy crashes over you. You feel like you’re floating for a second, everything going hazy. Anakin follows right after, spilling himself deep inside you with a guttural moan that’s almost enough to send you over the edge again.

And just like that, it's over. You're both a sweaty, panting mess, tangled up together, and you can’t help but think, Well, that was definitely worth the hype.

[beef-brisket]

Adam and Lucifer stood to the side as Charlie was about to start another group session. Lucifer looked a tad nervous, because everyone seemed to be looking and pointing at them.

Adam: You seem tense.

Lucifer: I-I think they know...

Adam: About us? Nonsense. Let them fester in their curiosity. I do like some good gossip~.

Lucifer chuckled: You're so bad.

Adam: I had to get my reputation somehow~.

Charlie: Alright, everyone! Shall we start-?

Angel throws his hand in the air, Lucifer doesn't trust that smile he has on his face.

Charlie: Oh! Uh- yes, Angel?

Angel: Toots, we've learned about "Traits of a Good Person" three times already. I have an idea for another topic~.

Vaggie: We don't want to know, Angel.

Charlie: It's okay, Vaggie. I trust him. What's your idea Angel?

Angel: "The importance of telling truths and being open with other people"!

The room was stunned into silence.

Adam: Wow. That's a great topic, Angel. I'm impressed.

Angel: Oh, you won't be, baby~.

Adam tilted his head. He's definitely concerned and he feels a tad threatened.

Charlie: Okay! I like that idea, Angel ! Shall we each ask someone a question, and that person had to answer honestly. I'll go first as an example. Adam: what's your favorite thing to eat?

Adam: Oh! That's easy. Venison~.

Everyone was silent again. They definitely forgot how creepy Adam could be. Lucifer, on the other hand, was staring lovingly at Adam.

Charlie: Great! Now, Adam, you ask someone something.

Adam: Hmm. Oh, the possibilities- Peter!

Peter sat up straight and smiled widely at his boss. He wasn't a gest but he loved participating.

Peter: Yes boss!?

Adam: Who is a fantastic cleaner and most loyal employee of mine?

Peter: Oh! Oh... uh... m-me?

Adam: Very good~.

Peter: Me! Lute-me! Me!

Lute rolls her eyes. Stupid bastard.

Charlie: How sweet! Okay, Peter, you're turn.

Peter: Boss!?

Adam perked up: Yes, Peter?

Peter: Favorite colour!?

Adam: Gold.

Angel: My turn- Adam~. Baby~.

Adam narrowed his eyes as Angel, he didn't like where this was going: Yes, "Angie"?

Angel: Who ya fuckin lately~?

Lucifer blushed but managed to remain composed.

Adam: You're mom. Next question.

Adam smiled at Angel's offended expression.

Lute: Boss.

Adam sighed: Yes, Lute?

Lucte: What's going on between you, and the king?

Adam: ...Nothing.

Charlie: Adam, you have to be honest- and come to think of it, you and dad have been spending a lot of time together. Do you like to dad, Adam?

Adam: I- yes. He's very kind and sweet. Next question.

Peter: Can I watch you two have sex!?

Adam: Peter- we've talked about this. You can't ask people that.

Peter: Sorry.

Adam: Next question?

Vaggie: Are you in a relationship with him?

Adam: With who?

Vaggie: Don't play dumb! The king!

Adam: "the king" has a name. Thank you. And yes, technically i do have a relationship with him.

Angel: You're so fucking him. Come one Adam! Tell us!

Charlie: Are you sure you're not with my dad?

Vaggie: You're highness, I thought you hated him- he hated you Adam.

Adam: Not a question, Vagatha.

Lucifer watched everyone through questions at Adam. He was handling it pretty well, but Lucifer could tell he was going to lose it.

Lucifer: ...do you love me?

Everyone stopped and looked at Lucifer. Even Adam. His expression was shock and maybe a tad of offense.

Adam: Of course I do. Have I not shown you? What more do I need to do? Tell me- and I'll do

Lucifer: Tell them. About us.

Adam smiled and grabbed his hand. The whole room was duiet: Of course. Lucifer and I have been connecting for a few weeks now. We have it official last night.

Angel: ...wow. I was expecting you to fight back a little.

Adam: Perish the thought! I only fight when I feel threatened~.

Lowkey want an au where Adam has Alastors' powers.

The tentacles

The eyes

The changing size

The shadows

The sass

The deal making

Him owning Husk and Nifty

The musical numbers

The radio control

The tentacles- have I mentioned that before?

The rivalry with Lucifer

Maybe he replaces Alastor entirely. No Alastor. Only Adam. It's always been Adam.

Thanks for coming to my tedtalk.

Only Adam lol This is good! His Husk and Nifty could be Lute and Peter.

He doesn't have to smile all the time does he?

Yessss, and he plays rock instead of jazz lol And yes of course there is a rivalry lol

[darkpuppysuit]

Hybrid!BTSxReader

Kim Seokjin: Black Jaguar, Min Yoongi: Black Panther, Kim Namjoon: Grey Timber Wolf, Jung Hoseok: Red Fox, Park Jimin: Golden Retriever, Kim Taehyung: Snow Tiger, Jeon Jungkook: Yukon Moose

Warnings⚠️: Cursing, Smoking, Mental scars come back to haunt Y/n, verbal abuse (towards the end).

Honestly this is mostly purely domestic things will ramp up here soon enough, I promise.

The wind blows me left and right as I push my way to the barn, rain is pelting me from all directions and I almost fall into the growing stream in front of the barn. Slipping through the crack of the big barn doors all I can see are the flickering candles that I had set out earlier in case the power went out, which it did the second I stood in front of my horse. She's stamping in her pen and jumping around obviously terrified by the raging storm or it could very well be the figures I saw run inside just mere minutes ago.

"Hey now, hush. You're okay Dovey." I do my best to soothe her, all is calm for a split second when her head darts to my right tracking something in the darkness and she starts to freak out again. Her head comes back with force colliding with mine and my ass meets the ground with a soft oof  slipping through my lips. "Mother fucker! Damn near broke my jaw doing that, knock it off!" I shout over the storm rubbing my lower jaw then lean back on one hand massaging the side of my head when there's a rustle in the hay bed directly in front of me.

A few moments pass by, then out of the corner of my eye, I spy a flash of orange sprint right into the other stall. "Hey, I'm not going to hurt you. Are you injured?" Lightning flashes outside with thunder booming closely behind letting me know we're in the thick of the storm and everything suddenly becomes scarier as it rages on outside yet it's almost dead silent inside the barn.

I stand up from my spot on the ground and make my way to the open stall across from Dove. Cautiously, keeping my hands raised as I make eye contact with a pair of glowing eyes narrowed in on my position. It doesn't feel like a death stare but a curious one although the narrow slits in its eyes says otherwise. "Hi, my name is Y/n. I've taken care of hybrids before I-" Pausing I mentally smack myself.

They're not going to trust you if you spout random shit like that, are you fucking serious?

I shrug my shoulders with an awkward smile. "Hi little guy." I barely move another step forward before I hear a low growl coming from my left and as I turn to face the noise, I'm quickly tackled to the ground by a fox hybrid. "Shit! Oh, y-you're not little a-are you?" I say shyly as the full grown fox hybrid looks up from the crook of my neck his pupils slightly blown out and his lips pressed into a soft heart shape, he's smiling and I can't help but stare at the gorgeous hybrid sitting on top of me before I break the silence.

"Uh-uhm c-could you, get off me?" I ask softly and the hybrids eyes widen quickly scrambling off of me. As we stand he curls his tail around his waist protectively and his ears pressed against the top of his head. "I-I'm sorry you just- y-you smell so good, I couldn't help myself." He mutters out his apology and I hear hay rustling again with quite a few pairs of footsteps followed behind with a low rumbling sound coming closer and my body goes ramrod stiff and eyes widen alarmingly as I look over to the fox hybrid. "I- it's f-fine."

I can barely get my response out of my mouth before I feel a firm rumbling chest press against my back. "Please, for all that is good in this world, tell me there isn't a m-moving, vibrating oak tree b-behind me." I stutter as my body begins to shake increasingly worse as the breathing brick wall lets out a low growl.

"Now that's enough you're scaring the poor girl! Can't you see she's shaking like a leaf!" I can't bring myself to turn around at all but the growling does stop eventually and my body relaxes just a little, if it relaxes at all. "I'm sorry about him he's just- protective." I nod in response bringing an arm up to wrap around my middle the best I can as I slowly spin around and back away with my head hung low, I bump into yet another chest and I freeze up again but I feel something soft and wet wrap around my waist instead.

"I'm sorry for scaring you." The mystery man says through gritted teeth, fighting against his natural instincts to protect his pack mates from the human in front of him. I hear him but I don't look up, my own fight or flight instincts have kicked in and I stare at the ground like a deer caught in the headlights of a car.

"Goddammit Namjoon, now look at what you've done, she's completely frozen!" Out of the corner of my eye I can see another pair of glowing eyes within the darkness, this one sounds blunt and to the point, oh boy I think to myself as I slowly try to ground myself by absently touching whoever the tail around my waist belongs to trying to move around it and get to the fabric underneath said tail so I can pick at it.

I close my eyes for a moment and only when the hybrid's chest meets my back do I realize I'm stroking it's tail, I quickly let go still a little dazed . "U-uhm, s-so, if you're going to s-stay here, I'm going to need names a-and... uhm- hybrid species so I can take care of you three? Or is there four of you?" I ask quizzically as the power turns back on and the barn is bathed in a warm golden light of the old lightbulbs that haven't been changed in years. 

As soon as my eyes adjust I open them again to not only find three or four but seven hybrids, yes seven male hybrids I count them at least three times as I look around me. There was a black panther hybrid with long black hair covering some of his handsome features leaning against a wall with his arms crossed just staring.

A golden retriever wrapped around my waist by his tail and his chest still rattling against my back staring anywhere but at me with the fox standing next to him awkwardly. What I'm pretty sure is a jaguar hybrid whispering to a damn giant grey wolf hybrid, he is a least a good foot or two taller than me. In fact now that I look around the room all of them are much bigger than me and it's daunting.

I'll have to look up at all of them just to speak to them. "Are we going to stand here while she stares at us or are we gonna get moving?" I look up and find kind eyes and soft features but the rest of him doesn't match his face.

He's tall with long dark curly hair, two lip piercings and a brow piercing, his arms are covered in tattoos too. He reminds me of an old greaser from the movies my grandparents used to watch. I look up and see he has two.... moose antlers? But they're small and form a halo around his head. "Don't be an ass Jungkook she's already scared enough as is." A hand meets my shoulder and it takes me a solid second to turn to the jaguar hybrid beside me. "Hi." I squeak mentally cursing my vocal cords.

This is so fucking awkward, why did I come out here? 

Oh, that's right I thought they were going to ransack the barn.                                                                                                                                            

It's their turn to stare, I would be flattered any other day that wasn't today but right now this is beginning to be too much for my racing heart and my nerves are shot. My mind is fogged and with the intense stare down from six hybrids my knees are close to buckling out from under me.

Just as the jaguar opens his mouth to speak Dove starts freaking out for a moment and I speed walk around the broad shouldered hybrid to get to her but she's calm as I walk towards her and when my eyes look up to see why I spot the tall fluffy, curly hair, tiger? Albino tiger, no his stripes are black not the usual odd blonde color, the ears on top of his head stand out like a sore thumb against his brown curls that lay just above his eye brows.

I steel myself and calmly walk over to him and Dove with a gentle yet shaky hand I pat her neck and the hybrid shuffles away a few steps. "She seems to like you." I manage to speak without my vocal cords betraying me this time, now that most of the other hybrids are within earshot and I can see most of them out of the corner of my eye I start to feel better about the whole situation.

"She likes it when you pat her neck, it's weird she doesn't like to be touched all that much by strangers but, by the looks of it she's comfortable around you, uhm." I stop for a second and look up at the snow tiger hybrid. "Taehyung." He holds his hand out for me to shake and I look between him and his outstretched hand a few times before he takes my hand into his and it completely engulfs my small hand within his grip.

Letting go I turn my attention back to Dove with pink cheeks and pat her neck again to show Taehyung how she likes to be shown affection and he copies my actions before a cough brings me out of my personal distraction and my body stiffens again.

"A-anyways, I don't mind you staying here but the barn needs a few repairs and the roof leaks quite a bit so with that being said, the house has plenty of space for you guys to spread out if you'd like and if not I can bring out some blankets and pillows for the night. If that's what you-"

Looking over my shoulder I can see the retriever and fox hybrid bouncing in place with small smiles on their faces and Taehyung wraps himself around my body in a warm hug while the others share a silent conversation. I lean into the hug and the warmth Taehyung's body gives off is comforting for a moment before the grey wolf lets out an exasperated sigh pinching the bridge of his nose and I quickly stand up straight.

"We'll go to the house with you if it's not too much trouble." A smile comes across my face for the first time in a while and I scrunch my nose a little in excitement to not have an empty house anymore. "Awesome! I made a little more food than I had planned on eating tonight so that works out perfectly! I'll make a little more since there's seven of you, okay?" I grab Dove's bridle and saddle off the far wall and saddle her up before giving her a kiss on top of her head, I hear a few whines off to the side but I don't comment on it.

"I'll be back, I'm sure we have a lot of work this morning." My previous anxiety about being around four apex predators, a moose, red fox, and a retriever melt away like the first frost of winter. I take a look outside from the big barn doors and smile, the rain has stopped and the sun is starting to rise.

As I open the door with the hybrids behind me and the fox and retriever flanking either side of me talking animatedly which has me laughing for the first time in a while. Looking around the yard I stop by the hen house to check on the little chicks and the mother hens, the fox looks at them curiously but once I determine they're okay I walk up the porch steps with the seven hybrids in tow.

"So this is the kitchen if you need anything and can't find it nine times out of ten it's gonna be in the walk in pantry just over there." I point to my right to the double doors against the far wall as we walk through the kitchen I stop in the foyer in front of the stairs. "Now these stairs are old and creak like nobody's business." I take a few steps up and they let out a shrill creak, a few of their ears flatten against their heads at the horrid sound. "So be careful when your walking around this house is old. My grandfather's grandfather built this house back when people could afford to build anywhere they wanted." I smile and walk further into the house.

"This is the parlor room er- the living room, uhm, there is a game system hooked up with a giant wall of movies-" I turn around and they have disbursed into different areas of the large room looking around at the pictures and paintings on the wall.

A warm feeling envelopes my heart and tears well up in my eyes as I watch all of them walking around being curious except for the wolf hybrid, who stands in the archway between the living room and foyer, staring me down like prey with his arm crossed, like he's waiting for me to throw them out or something.

If it wasn't for his overwhelming stature and broad build that reminds me so much of my asshole father maybe, just maybe, I wouldn't feel like he is about to murder me in my own home. "S-so uhm, the bedrooms are upstairs. You can pick any bedroom you want or if you want me to s-show you-" I flinch hard when the retriever runs up to me grabbing my hand to drag me back to the foyer and up the stairs. I know he saw me flinch but I'm thankful he didn't say anything. Soon they've all settled into their respective rooms, I've learned their names as we toured the upstairs so that part of my brain has now relaxed to an extent.

I stand at the stove in the kitchen making breakfast with Jimin glued to my side like a well, for lack of a better phrase, a lovesick puppy. "And then we pour a little bit into the pan like this." I'm cooking pancakes with eggs and sausage with a few other dishes in different cast iron skillets like my grandmother used to do when I was little and I would spend the night when my father had gotten bad before they realized just how shitty he could really be. "Once the top starts bubbling that's when you know it's ready to flip over, see?"

Jimin stares in awe as I flip the pancake over and the bottom is a crispy golden brown. Perfect. After breakfast was done I called out for the rest of the house to come and get it like a dinner bell. One by one they file in from either the living room or their bedrooms but the footsteps stop short in the archway, staring at the table.

"All of this? For us?" The hybrid I've come to know as Jin is actually a very soft individual despite his predator counterpart. "Of course, I'm lucky enough to of had all my cast irons washed and seasoned yesterday so I cooked a big breakfast for you guys. I'm sure you're all hungry."

I smile brightly at all of them as Jungkook is the last to arrive. "Holy shit look at all this food. Are you a line cook or something?" He looks at me with his big innocent looking eyes, I chuckle and set a few paper plates down with plastic silverware and napkins, standing off to the side. "Well, don't just stand there find a spot and dig in." I smile brightly, Jimin and Hoseok are the first to sprint to the table followed closely by Taehyung and Jungkook (who look like they could eat all of it by themselves if they wanted to) followed by Yoongi and Jin.

I walk over to the sink and take a sip of my energy drink, doing my best to stay awake while looking at the six hybrids sitting at my table, I can't help but smile softly at the scene in front of me. They're talking like a family who hasn't been without each other their entire lives, arguing with each other like siblings and feeding each other and stuffing their cheeks as if this would be their last meal, they had to taste everything.

Namjoon being the ever so silent yet calculating pack alpha stands in the doorway again before Jin is dragging him to sit at the opposite head of the table with the chair across from him, empty. "Aren't you going to join us?" Taehyung looks up from the spot next to the empty chair with his cheeks filled with food and I look at him my face burning with the intense eye contact. "Oh, uh, no I gotta get back outside and take a look at what damage the storm caused. But you guys are welcome to roam if you want and if you need me just holler and I'll be back in as soon as I can."

They share a look between them and I barely hear Jimin whisper the word 'holler' again phrased like a question to Hoseok before they shrug their shoulders and go back to eating. Taehyung breaks his gaze to focus on his plate shaking his head as I walk out into the small nook that houses my work gear. Just as I buckle the last spur onto my boot, I feel someone tapping my shoulder and I jump back with my fists raised.

"Hey whoa take it easy, didn't mean to startle you." I take a deep breath and clutch my chest whilst trying to calm my racing heart. "It's decided, you need a fucking bell." I deadpan, Yoongi's cheeks turn a soft shade of pink as I grab my hat off the hook and put it on my head tying my hair back in a low ponytail. "Uhm, I wanted to ask you if there's any, extra blankets-" I quickly cut him off because I've already made Dove wait this long to get back outside I can't make her wait much longer before she starts going stir crazy.

"Oh, yeah the linen closet is just under the stairs there should be a few quilts in there or something, I gotta get back outside, Doves been waiting for almost two hours and I gotta check on the cows." I pat Yoongi on the head and his cheeks burn brighter as my pinky gently brushes the base of his ear. "I'll be right outside if you need me okay?" I say as I walk through the front door and into the side yard to start picking up the tree limbs. 

A few hours of picking up limbs  and throwing them in the bed of the truck with a few other tasks checked off my mental list. I've left the biggest branch for last because, well, it's a big bitch but I'm sure I can handle it by myself for the most part.

"Hey let me help you." I jump a foot backwards from the truck hearing my fathers voice for a moment before I turn around to see Namjoon standing on the other side of the truck.

"Uhm, thanks but I got it handled." I speak awkwardly as I shift to the large branch only for Namjoon to move around the truck and swiftly come to my aide. "Let me help you, it's a big branch Y/n I don't think you can lift it by yourself. " In the back of my mind I know he's just trying to help but I've gone three years doing stuff like this alone. I growl at him and scowl, Namjoon is quick to return the growl ten fold as I stare at him in the eyes.

"I said, I fucking got it." I don't know why my first reaction is anger maybe it's because he reminds me so much of my father a little too much or my other issue being I like to challenge myself from time to time. I grab the branch by the broken end as the other hybrid's run out of the back door wanting to help or to diffuse the situation I don't know.

I pick it up and toss it into the truck before jumping onto Dove's back from behind her pulling the straps to the right. "I told you I didn't need help. Now, did you need anything else?" I ask looking down at the hybrid's below me from the horses back, they can smell the frustration and anger rolling off the pair of us having a staring competition.

I can't help but feel a little pissed but also a little scared as Namjoon turns and pushes pass the others back into the house growling and throwing his hands around in anger and frustration.

I take a deep breath once he's finally inside, my hard shell cracking down around me. "I know you guys mean well but I got this, I'm sure you've been through enough and need to rest. We can all go out and get you some less holy clothes, maybe a few pairs of shoes and whatever else y'all want." My southern drawl slips out to the men around me and there is a long pause accompanied by a few unblinking stares between us before Dove starts stamping her hooves into the mud.

"Right, we can do all that tomorrow, I'll take the afternoon off. Uhm, can any of you drive a truck? I usually pull her along side but that's too slow and I would like to get this shit done so I can cook dinner for everyone later." I ask awkwardly leaning over to pat Dove's neck to both calm her and distract myself from the lingering stares on me.

Jin slowly raises his hand and I smile at him. "Could you drive it through the gate? I'll show you were the burn pile is out in the field. Maybe after it dries up enough we can light a fire? There's enough wood here to have it burn for a day or two." I shrug my shoulders after I kick the side of the truck and both Jimin and Hoseok walk over to Dove and I, looking down and to my right at Hoseok. "Do you think Jimin and I can ride out there with you?" I look between him and Jimin curiously, mentally trying to figure out how to do this.

"You guys want to ride in the bed of the truck or with me?" I can't help but giggle at their smiling faces and swishing tails. Jimin looks nervous as he brushes his fingers through his golden blonde tail. "I don't know how to ride a horse though." He says sheepishly as he looks intently at the ground. "That's okay Jimin honey, you can sit in front and we can make Hoseok take the ass end." Jimin's smile returns to his plush lips while Hoseok looks slightly offended or hurt by my remark but his soft smile is quick to return to his handsome face as I take Jimin's hand and tell him to put his foot in the stirrup and climb up as I pull him in front of me only he's facing the wrong way and I can't help but laugh softly. "Jimin sweety, you need to turn around." I adjust my hat on my head as his perfect cheeks are graced with a cute shade of pink.

"O-oh, s-sorry." I tell him it's okay and lean back so he can swing his feet over to the correct sides of the saddle and I look over to Hoseok if he needs any help. "Come on Hobi! It's a whole other world up here!" Jimin shouts as Dove moves back and forth a little spooked by the sudden volume change, Hoseok quickly grabs my outstretched hand and hauls himself up to sit behind me and I blush as he snakes his long arms around my middle and lays his head on my back rubbing his cheek against the nape of my neck, absently scenting.

I grab the straps to the bridle tightly. "Okay Dovey, let's get this shit done." I urge her to move forward slowly but she has other ideas and jolts forward as if this is the happiest she's ever been. I grab onto the back of Hoseok's tattered shirt when she sprints forward, him and Jimin let out a scream and with my other hand I yank the bridle back and she stops only to walk a little slower. The others laugh as they get into the truck and Jin drives it through the gate except Yoongi he walks back to the house either to check on Namjoon or take a nap, who knows.

Once all of the branches are thrown on the ever growing burn pile I wipe the sweat from my forehead and set my hands on my hips standing next to the truck. "Thanks for the help guys, it would've taken me for-fucking-ever to get this done without you." I huff wiping off more sweat when Jimin runs over to me with big eyes.

"Y/n-ie! When do you think we could light that fire?" His words pour out of his mouth quickly like a running faucet, I lay my hands on his shoulders and he calms down just a little. "We have to wait until the wood isn't soaking wet Jimin-ie." The small nickname that falls from my lips causes his energy to spike, giving him a soft smile before ruffling his hair, returning my hands to my jean pockets. "The next few days are going to be warm and sunny so, I'll probably be out here more often than not." Jimin nods and goes back to playing with Hoseok jumping around happily as he relays the information I just told him.

Digging into my jacket pocket, I pull out my pack of cigarettes and light one as I watch Taehyung join in on the fun. Taking a drag Jungkook walks over to me, leaning his hip against the truck, "Care if I steal one?" I turn to face him cocking an eyebrow. He points to the cigarette hanging from my mouth.

"They're menthol are you sure?" I ask as I open the pack again he just shakes his head so I hand one to him. He reaches for the lighter before I hold it out of reach. "Nah-ah, I've had too many lighters go missing. I'll light it."

Jungkook furrows his brows and looks at me like I'm half crazy then he leans forward waiting. I hold the lighter in front of his face and he lights it but he doesn't move away, instead he looks me in the eyes and smirks when my cheeks grow hotter than they already were.

We're so close one move and I'll hit my head on his fucking antlers. "You know anyone of us, even Jimin, could over power you at any given minute, right?" He takes another drag of his cigarette before leaning back against the truck finally giving me breathing room.

"I know that, I'm used to dealing with dog and cat hybrid's so a good chunk of all of this is new to me. I'm used to them staying either a few hours and then moving on or leaving after a night of rest. Which you guys should be doin' anyways." I nudge him in his side with a smile taking the last drag of my cigarette flicking it onto the wet pile across from me. "We would've gotten some rest had you not challenged the alpha wolf earlier."

I turn my head away from him and look off to my right, Dove has joined the hybrids and I see Taehyung take off running after her like they're playing a game of tag. "I'm sorry about that. It's just- I- he-" I shake my head and rub the back of my neck looking back at him when Hoseok almost falls to the ground stifling the laugh caught in my throat. "You don't have to justify your actions Y/n. He needs to be knocked down a peg or two anyways. Two alpha's of different species going at it is always fun to watch." Jungkook flicks his own cigarette butt into the pile before turning towards me with his hands slipping into his back pockets.

"Two alph- no, ugh, he wanted to help me with the big branch but then he said he didn't think I could lift it, I don't know why those words triggered me the way they did, he was just trying to help and I bit his fucking head off." I take a deep breath, rubbing my face in frustration calling Dove over. "I'm quick to anger and I'm sorry if any of you have to see it, much less deal with it yourselves. I've been doing my best to fix my face I swear."

I tap my cheeks as the horse trots up to meet me and I glance at him to try and gage his reaction but he remains stoic and unaffected by my words like he's trying to process how not to piss me off or something. He does let a chuckle come through so, that makes me feel a little better. "Y/n-ie! Can I ride with you this time?" I turn my head to see Taehyung all up in my bubble with his chin on my shoulder and his white striped tail swaying back and forth excitedly hoping I'll say yes.

"Of course you can! Move for a second I don't wanna kick ya in the face." He moves to the opposite side of the horse and I swing my leg over and sit on the saddle with my thighs squished against her sides and I look over at Taehyung. "Think you could do that by yourself?" He looks at me and then the saddle and back to me, I raise a brow at him like dude, come on you got long legs surely you don't need help up.

I roll my eyes and give him a hand and he sets his foot into the stirrup before hauling himself onto the back of the horse. "Good boy." The words leave my lips and I don't even notice the look him and Jungkook share once those words fall from my mouth because Jimin quickly sits in front of me distracting me from looking at the pair and I can't help but smile at his eagerness.

I hold onto the bridle straps and wrap my arms around Jimin this time and rest my chest against his back to make a little more room for Taehyung. Once everyone is settled and a pouting Hoseok is put into the bed of the truck with Jungkook who keeps smiling at the two blushing hybrids sitting horseback holding onto me tightly, myself oblivious to the people around me as always.

I get into the house and take my boots and coat off, everyone is toeing their shoes off next to mine, and awkwardly standing in the crowded nook waiting. I look around at the four of them around me when Jungkook pushes through from the back making his way to sit in the living room with Taehyung who attaches himself to the hem of his shirt, closely following the moose hybrid.

I walk to the kitchen with Jimin and Jin in tow. "What do you guys want for dinner?" I open the large pantry that also holds a big freezer to the left and endless shelves of snacks and treats as well as dry ingredients to the right. "I'm not picky so I don't care what you make, I'll eat it." Jungkook yells from the living room Taehyung silently nodding along, reminding me just how good hybrid hearing really is.

"Okay then I'll make some chicken enchiladas for you six and for Namjoon as an apology for ripping him a new asshole earlier..." I think for a moment clicking my tongue as I sift through the shelves then walk over to the large freezer.

I open it up and set a hand on my hip tonguing the inside of my cheek lost in thought then I find what I was looking for. "Ah-hah! Found it!" I practically jump into the freezer, my feet coming off the ground a few inches. Standing back on my feet, I pull out a T-bone steak and throw it on top of the freezer once it's closed and move to look for the rest of the ingredients for enchiladas and a glass pan to cook it in. 

Pulling the pan out of the oven and setting it on the potholders on the table I waddle back to the stove top to finish the steak and little fixings I put together for Namjoon. I make his plate and set it in the microwave above the stove incase he doesn't come down right away.

"Dinner is re-" I turn around to find my table already filled with bodies and I raise my hands level with my shoulders. "Okay, nevermind. Where's Namjoon?" I peek into the fridge and grab the few bottles of salsa and hot sauce that I have along with a small tub of sour cream and set it all on the table. Jungkook and Taehyung already putting their plates together. "Make sure you save some for me you heathens!"

I shout playfully pointing my finger at the two hybrids across the table as I walk away from the kitchen to find the wolf hybrid. "Hey! Dinner's ready! I know you can hear me mister!" I shout from the bottom of the stairs after I couldn't find him in the living room. I feel like a mother who has to drag her teenage son from his room just to eat with everyone for a change.

It might have only been a few hours but having people to take care of instead of just the farm animals is a feeling I don't want to lose. "I'll go get him Y/n, you go eat." Jin rubs my shoulder with a small smile that I return. "Thanks Jin, I owe you one." He rubs my back in soothing circles then heads upstairs and I leave the staircase back to the kitchen.

A few moments later I hear the grumbling voices of both Namjoon and Jin arguing while walking down the stairs. "She made me something different?" His tone of voice was softer as he rounded the corner to see his seat was empty and there was no plate in sight. Mid bite I quickly stand up from my chair knocking it over as I rush to the microwave.

"Shit sorry! I left it in here so it would stay hot." I take his still very hot plate out of the microwave and slamming it shut making everyone wince at the loud noise. Jin takes his place by Jimin and starts eating his own food when his eyes light up. "Oh my god this is amazing Y/n! Where did you learn to cook?" He asks as he shoves another much bigger bite into his mouth and I set Namjoon's plate in front of his respective seat. "My grandma taught me how to cook and my mother taught me how to bake when I was little."

I look at the floor as Namjoon takes his seat and I can't help but tear up a little. They notice a change in my scent instead of the normal leather and cedar wood with a hint of coconut and vanilla, Jin was quick to do damage control. "I'm sorry if it's a touchy subject, I'll be more careful wi-" I quickly look up and cut him off, I seem to have a habit of that. I shake my head a little. "No it's okay! My uh, my mom died when I was... when I was like ten and I only had one friend growing up so..."

I trail off and look to Namjoon who has yet to touch his food, he's just sitting there shuffling in his seat and I set a hand on his shoulder. "Namjoon? You okay?" He looks up at me and the faintest pink blush creeps across his cheeks. "Y-yeah, I'm fine." His short reply is enough for me to nudge him with my hip. "Then eat honey, I wanted to apologize to you for my uh- for being pissed at you earlier. I didn't mean to I just, get upset when someone tells me I can't do something or they hint at me not being able to do something. That's all."

I give him a half smile as he cuts into his steak and I wait for him to take the bite, subtly his eyes shine for a second before he swallows and turns to me opening his mouth to speak. "It's good th-thank you." I smile at him and clasp my hands together and my smile somehow gets bigger when out of the blue I hug him from the side. His tail makes a soft thumping sound against the back of his chair but he quickly stops it as though the sudden action had bitten him.

"I'm so happy you like it Joon!" I release him and speed waddle my way back to my seat to finish my food. The is table finally filled and I smile as I take a bite looking across the way as the others return to the plates in front of them and resume their conversations.

Jin is staring at Namjoon with a smile on his face, looking at the hybrid next to him spacing out looking at his plate frozen in place, after a moment he looks up at me and his cheeks burn a rosy red before he quickly goes back to eating.

After everyone is finished I take the plates and glass pan off the table walking to the sink to start cleaning them as most of the hybrid's have moved into the living room. Yoongi stands over my shoulder watching me wash the dishes and put them in the drying rack. "May I help you?" I ask curiously smiling as I half turn towards the panther hybrid behind me with a plate in hand. "I can- Do you want any help?"

He corrects himself as he remembers the conversation from earlier. "Oh, well, you don't have to help if you don't want to, it's okay." I shrug my shoulders while he shakes his head moving to the side grabbing a towel before drying the few dishes stacked to his right. "It's the least I can do after you've cooked for us twice now and I don't think any of the others are going to help." I look at him for a second before leaning back to look into the living room.

Taehyung and Jungkook have started a video game to play together and Jin is sitting on the couch behind the two on the floor watching while Hoseok and Jimin are playing around with a tennis ball they found somewhere (where they found it I have no clue) and Namjoon is sitting on the recliner reading a book from the nearby shelf with his long legs crossed over each other.

"Well I guess one helper is better than none." He nods and we talk for a little bit before a comfortable silence takes over the kitchen, it's nice to have company but not have the need or want to fill the soundless void.

With the dishes dried and put in the correct places (Yoongi needed help at least four times before he memorized the whole kitchen) I dry my hands off and set the towel on the oven handle before moving to the stairs. "I'm going to take a shower if you need any-" Jungkook interrupts by screaming. "Take that you cheating mother fucker!" In triumph he throws his hands in the air, Taehyung covering his eyes chuckling out of frustration his strategy didn't work anymore and I just giggle.

"I'm going to take a shower if you need anything, ask Yoongi." I point behind me as he walks forward trying to catch me before I sprint up the stairs laughing. He turns to face the room staring at him. "Don't ask me for a fucking thing, I barely got the kitchen down."

Stepping out of the shower I take a long look in the mirror. "Seven of them, that's a lot to handle. They're probably going to leave in the morning anyways so what's the point in putting them in better clothes?" I ask myself as I get dressed in an oversized band tee and long basketball shorts before the mirror talks back.

"Look at you, once a whore always a whore."

I recognize that voice, it's the same voice that would yell at me for something as little as spilling his beer when I brought it to him. "That's right babygirl, it's daddy." It whispers nastily.

I whip around and the only person I see in the mirror is myself, shaking my head I turn to walk back into my room when I see him through the mirror next to my bed and I freeze in front of it. "I'm sure you'll be a good fuck for those beasts, huh?" His reflection stares back with a shit eating grin, I grit my teeth and ball my hands into fists. "You're not real, I shot you four fucking times."

My mind flashes back to that night shivering at the image of his skull and brain matter littering the basement walls. "Oh sweetheart, you know that won't stop me from seeping into your subconscious. You know that better than anyone. Trauma like yours runs deeper than what people can see."

The venom drips from his mouth as he speaks it's acidic and my hands begin to hurt with how hard I'm pressing my nails into my palms. "Just go away dickwad, I don't need this shit." I wave him off but just when I think this illusion of my father couldn't get any more real he grabs my jaw, digging his fingers into my round cheeks. "You listen here cocksheath I don't need the attitude so drop it."

He growls and I nod out of habit, this was the first time he had actually touched me which meant he can hurt me if he wanted to, which I'm sure he does. "Sorry darlin' old habits die hard, ya know?" He chuckles darkly letting me go and I fall to my knees with a thud tears threatening to fall from my already puffy eyes.

"Such a good girl for daddy. Now get those filthy creatures out of here!" He shouts words only I can hear and my blood begins to boil. "They're not creatures, they're just as much of a human as I am." I whisper knowing if I shout back at him someone will come and wonder who I'm screaming at when they find me alone.

"No they're not! They belong in a zoo or a circus, they're freaks!" I cover my ears and rock back and forth while humming trying to block him out. "Pay attention to me bitch!" My body is shaking violently as he keeps shouting at me the world be damned at this point.

I stand up on my bare feet and look him in the eyes and my fist goes flying before I have a second to think about it, the mirror shatters into a million pieces and I fall knees first onto the shards below me, my face relaxed and void of all emotion.

I vaguely hear numerous pairs of feet running upstairs as I stare at the blood slowly covering the floor underneath me, I stare blankly at the floor when my bedroom door flies open, I don't dare move, still lost in my own head space. "Y/n! Fuck." Jungkook and Yoongi are the first to burst through the door followed closely by the others.

"Don't move that's a lot of shards on the floor." Yoongi is mindful of the broken mirror when he walks slowly towards my kneeling figure in the dimly lit room as the others stand nervously inside by the door.

"Y/n?" He waves his hand in front of my face and I flinch backwards and my back hits the bed, bringing my knees up to my chest I can't catch my breath and start breathing rapidly.

Bringing my hands up to my face to deflect the blow I'm sure was about to meet my body. "Please, stop. I-I'll be good I swear! I won't do it again." Of course this is when I can't tell illusion from reality, I try to make myself as small as I can so maybe the figure in front of me won't hurt me.

"Y/n, it's Yoongi. You're alright, we won't hurt you." He raises his hand to pull my arms from my face to reveal my red puffy eyes and wet cheeks, my eyes full of pain. "Take a deep breath for me okay? Deep breath kitten come on."

I keep my eyes trained on my knees unwilling to meet their gaze. My breathing slowly regulates and I eventually come back to reality, slowly taking in the environment around me and the seven hybrid's standing around my bedroom door with worried faces.

Jimin is crying against Taehyung's chest while silent tears fall from his eyes, Hoseok is hiding behind Namjoon with his tail tucked between his legs while the wolf hybrid stands tall resisting the urge to pick me up, put me into bed and scent the hell out of me until he decides it's enough.

Jin is shaking and out of breath from running up the stairs quicker than he ever has before while Jungkook is standing next to Yoongi who's kneeling in front of me his expression the calmest out of them but he's anything but calm his primal need to scent and soothe almost clouds his judgment when he takes my hand that sucker punched the mirror into his own.

"Sweetheart, where do you keep the first aid kit? Can you tell me?" His voice is soft and quiet I almost didn't hear him. Looking at him nodding towards my bathroom, he tears his eyes away from me to tell one of them to go grab it then quickly turns his attention back to my shaking form. 

"Let's move you to the bed so we can get you cleaned up." I shake my head determined to stay on the floor, to stay as small as I possibly can. Namjoon grunts and my head snaps to him waiting by the door, meeting his eyes for all but a moment before Hoseok comes back with the first aid kit from the bathroom and hands it off to the panther hybrid in front of me.

He sets a hand on my shoulder trying to look me in the eyes and failing when I bring my head into my lap. "I'm going to clean the blood off your hand and knees, okay?" I shake my head and he takes my bloody hand in his, without missing a single step he tilts his head to look at the hybrids at the door. "Could one of you find the broom and clean this up so she doesn't cut her foot when I put her in bed?"

I let out a hiss of pain when the cotton bud soaked in alcohol meets a particularly deep cut on my knuckles. "N-no, I'll c-clean it, please don't feel the need to clean up my mess. I hate that you have to see me so weak, I'm not worth fretting over like this." I take my hand back tears falling from my eyes before Yoongi is finished cleaning it but he quickly takes it back with a tsk and I raise my head.

"That's bullshit and you know it. Nobody with a heart like yours could be worthless." He scowls at me not out of anger but out of concern for my well being.

I watch him clean and bandage the wounds on my body silently and I've calmed down quite a bit surprisingly enough. "Can you stand?" Jungkook makes his presence known, I look down and try to push my big ass off of the floor but my legs quickly turn into mush and I fall back down to the floor, a piece of glass cuts into my already bandaged hand and starts to bleed.

"I swear you're more accident prone than Namjoon." Jungkook chuckles trying his best to make light of the current situation. He nudges past Yoongi to me and picks me up bridal style then turns to set me on the bed. "Do you want to talk about it?" He looks down at me with his sweet chocolate brown eyes and I give him a small smile shaking my head no.

"Give me your hand, clumsy woman. I should've known you'd be accident prone when your chair fell over standing up from the kitchen table earlier." Yoongi rolls his eyes as he patches my hand yet again and my smile grows tenfold. "I know, I'm sorry you guys had to see me like this and take care of me. Haven't even been here a day." I apologize to the room as Yoongi kisses my wrist before putting it by my side again.

"Don't apologize kit. You have nothing to be sorry for and don't argue with me." His eyes flash yellow with narrow slits in the middle before they quickly go back to normal and I nod in return my eyes slowly closing before shooting open again looking over at Jimin and he walks over with his tail wrapped around his waist.

"I'm sorry I made you cry Jiminie." I sniffle before he comes closer to my bed, careful to avoid the broken mirror and Yoongi who's bent over to sweep up the shards with the broom Taehyung finally brought up. "I was so scared when I saw the blood, I thought you- I- I thought..." Tears fill his eyes again and I caress his face wiping away the stray tear that fell onto his pink cheek.

He moves to crawl into bed behind me on instinct before he stops looking at me for permission and I give him a nod before he moves under the blankets behind me. He cuddles against my back and rubs his nose against the nape of my neck to soothe his own nerves as he wraps his arm around my stomach and under my head.

The others slowly make their way out of the room leaving Jimin, Yoongi and myself alone. Yoongi sits at the edge of the bed gently kneading my calf while Jimin snores softly tightening his grip and rubbing his cheek against my neck every so often so I knew he was still here.

[daenysx]

Okay blurb req for old money!Aemond who is ALSO a model for really expensive brands and his gf is a photographer👀 inspired by the photoshoot and that one specific blue leopard print pic🙂‍↕️🤭

oh my god i hope i did well, thank you, rue !! <33333

modern!aemond targaryen x fem!reader

cw; modern!aemond being a hopeless romantic, suggestive, kisses, no but he's really so in love it hurts, photographer!reader and model!aemond can be a new favorite wow

"are you sure this is professional?"

aemond has no shame, honestly. you don't think you can be expected to be 'professional' when your boyfriend looks like he'll ruin your entire existence by looking like the most charming being in the entire universe.

his blue eyes sparkle in the latest photos you take, a stark contrast with his platinum blonde hair. flowy strands make you want to pull aemond to yourself enough to give him a good kiss on his neck as your fingers travel in his hair. maybe you can do that when you get to be alone with him. oh, you'll definitely do that when you're alone.

"i believe i'm extremely professional." you murmur, holding his hand to make him pose the way you want. "if you stop being so distracting, it'll be even better."

he smirks. a small quirk of lovely lips, he's handsome and he knows it. he leans into your space and your hold on your camera tightens. you will not kiss him. you can't, there are other people here, and this is business. you take a step back.

"i'm only doing what you tell me to do." he says like he's the most innocent man. "you can't say i'm not being good."

you give him a small smile. he's in the mood for playing.

"i didn't say that." you say, quietly. "come on, a few more for me and we'll be done."

aemond fixes his posture, your one hand still holding his. "of course." he says, coolly. "you know i can actually be good for you. as many as you want, you'll have it."

you lick your lips to control your face expressions. not the time, not the place. just like you say to him, only a few more and you'll be done.

the clothes he's wearing make aemond look taller as if it's actually possible. you admire his poses, his confidence and his awareness of how good he looks. he turns his head for another picture, his eyes following your every move. it's like a wordless conversation between you two.

"can i get one with a smile?" you ask him, your hand directing his last pose. "not too wide, just- a subtle one, please."

"i'm afraid that's not possible if i'm going to give you a smile." he flirts. "maybe you should let someone else take the photo if you need a subtle one."

you hear two girls giggling at the corner. he really thinks he's so fun, doesn't he? it's his world here, he knows how to charm his way and he certainly knows how to be a flirt. you're thankful he's already yours, it would be impossible to handle him otherwise.

after another fifteen minutes, you're all done. you go next to aemond, leaving your camera. people around you move quickly to clean up the place, and fix all the mess that has been made. aemond takes your hand to brush a kiss on your knuckles. his eyes are warm this time, so clear under this lights.

"what do you think?" he asks. "good?"

you nod softly. "probably the best in a long time."

"kind of hard not to." he wraps his arms around your waist to pull you closer. "i had the best photographer."

you give him a kiss on his cheek but that's all. he's been teasing you all day long. "do you flirt with all your photographers like this, mr. targaryen?"

"absolutely not." he answers, cheekily. "my flirting skills are reserved for only one person."

"i think you owe me a drink." you tell him. "even working is easier than trying to deal with your incessant teasing."

"we'll have dinner first." he says, kissing the side of your head. he doesn't say, but he's tired. "think of what you want to eat when i'm changing, okay? i have a few options if you can't decide."

[lasandra]

Super Massive End Game Veilguard Spoilers Under the Cut!

Seriously. If you haven't finished playing Veilguard, DO. NOT. READ. So I finished DA:tV and I have been really trying to sort out my thoughts... And well...

Sdlkajshdfklajhsdfklajhsdflkjahsdklfjhaskldfjhaskldfhj I CAN'T!!! My dudes I am SO conflicted!!! Solas is the only character I have ever come across that I both love to pieces and want the best for him but I also want to beat him until he is a puddle of bruised yolk and cracked shells. This dude KILLED VARRIC FOR REALSIES! I am not okay with that. My Hawke's GOING to hunt him down when she finds out. If the Tevinter Magisters can get into the Black City then dammit so can she. And when she does, I am not sure even Lavellan can save him. Amelia (My Hawke) has lost so many of her friends/family/loved ones she can't handle this anymore. He also killed God's gift to elves Felassan. It's been over a decade since I read The Masked Empire but I don't remember there being a great reason other than him being upset that Felassan failed. Dude has GOT to stop killing his friends lol. Especially the hot ones. Like. Come on. As if that wasn't enough, he manipulated Rook. I love my first Rook (Carwyn de Riva) so much that I am STRUGGLING to play another playthrough with any of the other Rooks I had planned. To see that he manipulated her with blood magic... Stopped her from being able to mourn Varric with the others properly.... AND tricked her into that prison??? He didn't think she'd be able to get out. Luckily she had plot armor because if she hadn't gotten out I would find a way into Thedas to rip him apart myself. *Aggressive breathing noises* I feel very normal about this, obviously. Seriously though, guys, I came THIIIIIIIS close to tricking him with the fake dagger even knowing that Lanaya (my Lavellan) wouldn't have gotten her happy ending. JUST so I could see the LOOK on his face when he realized ROOK outplayed him at his own game! At the SAME time however... The idea of sending him into the Black City alone... hurts me lol! I don't want him to suffer. Dude has suffered a lot and honestly, I'm not entirely sure his being a friend-murdering ass is *entirely his fault... The longer I sit with everything, the more certain I am that Solas didn't really have a choice. Seems very much like he was sort of bound to the will of Mythal. Maybe I've missed something, I'm not as lore-savvy as I once was. But in the end when Mythal tells Solas that she releases him from her service and only THEN (NOT when Lavellan BEGS him to stop) is he willing to do the right thing? I don't know. It just reminded me SO much of his personal quest in Inquisition where his Wisdom Spirit friend had been bound and twisted against its purpose. If it works anything like what we saw in Inquisition with whoever drank from the Well of Sorrows, who's to say when something was him vs the will of Mythal? It could be a bit of a stretch but, there's certainly room for that interpretation, I think. And if that's the case, then he doesn't deserve the hell that awaits him. It's also the only interpretation I can really accept Lanaya still wanting to be with him. Varric was her friend too. While forgiveness is something I give freely, I cannot imagine reconciling with a man who did what Solas did without him having been essentially forced into doing it. *Sighs deeply* I saw the different versions of his endgame images... Shit man. The only way this man gets a happy ending is with Lavellan. Dude looks so miserable and gloomy in all the other endings. Moire (Trevelyan) was Solas' friend. She wouldn't want to send him off to be alone in such a terrible place. That would seriously eat at her. (Rook wouldn't care. Her give a damn was busted after he betrayed her for the twenty-billionth time.) It can never be anything but a complete and utter rollercoaster with this man! I do think that the ending I got with him was as good as it possibly could have been though, given everything. Sorry for this really poorly written rant. I needed to get this out of my system and it's almost 3am lol.

[icarusredwings]

Gonna have to reject your offer of He/ It cheif. Managment (Logan) would kill you for even inferring the idea.

Other people would come along and be like "What is that thing!??"

And you would just see Logan shift instantly from "Yeah ill give you a can of beans and a place to rest" to "Get the fuck off my property before you become his dinner" all while Wade is just... sitting there... behaving??

"He's not a THING! Thats my husband you asshole! And if you don't like it then fuck off!" Followed by Gabby going "Thats my papa you jerk!"

"It's just a zombie? You're married to a sombie!?"

"Again- HES my husband. I said till death do us part except death really isnt his thing so im stuck with him. You got a problem with that!?"

It makes Wade always very happy to be defended even though he surely could do it himself. For the most part things are pretty tame.

But he DOES clap a bit when logan mentions feeding him. 'Ooh yay, I get fed multiple times today' kind of way since Logan is very strict about resources, Wades is not allowed to just eat whatever because he'd probably just eat everything.

Sometimes if Logan forgets to feed him, He'll come to Logan and give him this specific whine, like a dog begging for bacon scraps only for Logan to feel terrible. "Oh my god Im sorry we were so busy today and- ... You're starving and you're not trying to bite me... you're trying so hard.. aw fuck wade.. im so sorry.. what am I going to do with you?"

"Mmm.... rawhrah?"

"Right. Feed you before you go insane. Got it."

Some days are like this. When he's clearly much more human. Being permitted cuddles and nuzzles, to play with gabby and to sleep in the bed. It's very rare that Logan lets him sleep in the bed. But it's the happiest day for wade when he is. And its not like they can even do anything (bro lost his dick miles ago and has no clue where the fuck it went but it just fell off somewhere and now hes a ken doll. This is great for those of you who like transfem wade COUGH COUGH)

But even if it didn't fall off its not like they could do anything anyway, They can't even kiss on the lips anymore. Logan has a theory that it's similar to rabies, where the infection has to be spread through saliva into an open cut or your mouth, etc.

So the nights he's allowed, they honestly just cuddle and stare at each other for a bit before sleeping. Usually, Wade is the little spoon because having Wade behind him is dangerous.

Wade heavily sees affection as a reward now, so getting to hug the girls is a massive thing for him, getting to sit there and watch gabby draw him is a big thing, hell Logan will sometimes even let Gabby play with wade out front because Wade has whole ass attacked other zombies whos tried to hurt gabby before.

One time Laura shot him in the head because gabby thought it would be a good idea to play "pretend zombie" and Wade didnt put two and two togerher that acting 'feral' as Logan calls it, outside with gabby would be a bad idea.

"What the fuck did you do that for!?"

"He was feral and going after gabs!!"

"Nu uh!! We were playing and you killed him for no reason! Youre so mean!"

Logan just sighs as gabby runs to her bed because it upsets her greatly when they have to 'keep wade in check' she fully understands that hes dangerous but deep down thats still her papa and watching your big sissy kill your papa is not something most 13 year olds would enjoy.

".. L.. you gotta stop wasting ammo. You know if it was really a code red that wouldn't do anything anyway. You have to decapitate him if you even want a flying chance. See?? Hes already up again... hi sweetie..."

Wade, whos sat up and now giving them a confused look of 'what did I do? 🥺'

"...arr Arawh"

"Im sorry, wade.." Laura squeaks out, still holding the shot gun. Shes just terrified of loosing gabby is all. To her, gabs is her responsibility.

"Rah awr rahrrr..."

"I know. She's sorry. She's just.. scared. No more playing that okay?"

"Mmh..😔"

There is infact some drift between laura and wade but neither of them mean it. Really they dont. If gabs is put of the picture Laura still smiles and talks to him but its like the moment gabby is near him Laura goes full protection mode and over reacts.

And FOR THE RECORD i have never seen the walking dead but its terrifying how accurate that picture is.

The longest Wade has been unconscious is probably 18 hours but this was before getting to the girls.

They have witnessed the exact thing you're saying, though. With Wade tied down in the shed, on his leash, and handcuffed, trying to talk to him, yelling at him to snap out of it because he's scaring the girls. Something different about feral wade from the other zombies though is it seems he's smarter, knawing on his handcuffs while most will just flail their arms helplessly. While his teeth dont do shit to the cuffs, its scary for Logan because it makes him think that one day he might actually have to find a way to kill him permanently.

He can undo locks, open cans, do many things that the others cant and he wants to believe its just Wades human part being stronger because in some weird way hes half mutant human and half zombie. A weird combo that makes him much different.

Laura, unlike gabby, too is terrified of one day wade going feral while their father is out collecting more supplies or hunting and she wont know what to do.

Wade isnt fast though. Thats the ONLY good thing. Hes smart, cant die, and is starving to death all the time. But hes slow. Infact he dosn't heal properly. His leg is half broken still from the last time it fell off and seems to barely be receptive to his brains nerves telling it to move so he lowkey drags it, only being able to use it to stand up right and take very small steps.

When he DOES finally come back hours later, He cries. Apologizes, begs for forgiveness, and most times is actually SCARED of Logan. While he hates it emotionally, he knows that logically it was a good thing for Wade to flinch away from him after being locked up.

A scared and fed zombie is a well-behaved zombie...

And before anyone comes here to say this is dehumanization of what ever else- HES LITERALLY NOT HUMAN ANYMORE.

Case closed. Besides I think wade would worry more about the fact of him trying to kill his kids then the fact hes leashed to a wall.

I dont CARE that it's November 9th and "Halloweens over" ITS MY BIRTHDAY MONTH ILL POST IF I WANT TOO

Anyway.

Thinking about apocolpse au.

Wade getting bitten by a zombie, Logan freaking out, Wade dying, and him coming back (Again)

"Didn't you just die?? I literally fucking burried you!!"

And wades like:

"Of course. Man, God REALLY hates you dosn't he?"

And he's bassically the same person except just saying, "Rahhah har ran re" (translation: I think the devil doesn't want me either)

"What?? Oh for fucks sake... tell me you're kidding.."

"Rah?" 🤔

"Great so now you stink more and you can't talk. Fucking lovely."

"Mmmmh..." 🥺 (would you still love me if I was a zombie?)

"*sighs, blushes and grumbles how insane this is and how much of a bad idea this is* Fine! Come on...."

"Raah!!" 😄

And sometimes his limbs fall off because I think it would be funny if you just saw him stop, turn around, pick up his arm and shove it back into place like a dislocated shoulder. (Marvel Magic)

But its very obvious that Wade is still consious and so logan leads him around, puts a leash on him, ties him up when he goes to sleep the first few nights so wade dosn't eat him, sometimes luring him with a piece of his thigh or telling him he'll feed him soon to make him behave.

The only thing about this resource wise is that it seems Wade is a bottomless pit, not ever able to get enough. It's like all the nutrients just pass right through him, so he can't get fed meals daily, but Logan will share at least one bite of his food. It makes Wade so happy and way more "wade like" than zombie.

Logan has learned that the hungrier Wade gets the worse it would be, snapping at logan a few times.

"Grr-"

"Aye! That's enough outta ya"

"GggRah!"

"Hey!! I said no! Bad! Bad wade!"

"Mmmh??"

"Bad!!"

"Mmh....rahah.."

"I forgive you. But stop trying to bite me. I feed you, don't I? I hold your hand and tell you that I love you?"

Wade is actually extremely friendly for a zombie (duh) and still yaps at logan except its nonsense. Logan tries hard to understand him and talk back.

He holds his hand sometimes, even lays next to him only to scold him if he gets too bitey. This is hard because wade already had a biting issue and seeing as he practically ate anything or anybody now it was more difficult.

"...aahh-"

"Wade- No."

"Ggr.. raahh"

"Wade! No! Bad."

"Mmmh..."

"Ill feed you tomarrow. Don't bite me mkay? You wanna hurt me?"

He shakes his head like a dog shaking off from a bath, or that ate a bee.

"Then don't bite me."

"Mmh? Mrah?"

"No. No kisses right now. Im still not even sure if thats safe.."

"Mmmh...🥺 ahrrah?"

"No, not even a tiny one."

"Mm...😔"

Until Logan grunts and pecks his hand. "There. Happy?"

"🙂‍↕️mh"

"Good."

Honestly Logan felt bad, pitited him. No matter what food he ate it wasnt enough substance to sustain him and sometimes Logan would wake up to find him eating a different zombie that made the mistake of trying to eat Logan.

You ever wake up in the morning, lose your zombie boyfriend, call for him only to walk outside and see him knawing on some poor chaps arm like a happy puppy who found a chicken leg? Logan has. Many times. And he wishes his phone would charge so he could take a picture of it but unfortunately theres no electricity in the post apocalypse world.

This being said Logan is like- THE perfect guy for apocalypse au because he can smell everything and hear anyone before they even get to you, he has better wilderness survival skills then anyone I know and he'll never NOT have a weapon on him because of his claws. The only downside is that he's tired easily, needs a lot of food, and would lowkey be withdrawing from his tabccao and alchool, therefore very moody.

"Stupid fucking apocalypse having to happen when im fucking alive!! Why can't I just NOT live through ONE major historical event! Is that too fucking much to ask? One damn decade where everything is fine and dandy and- WADE! Get your ass away from that!! It's radioactive!! For fucks sake!"

"Rahahrah?"

"NO!! You can not become Spiderman! That's not how that works!"

"Aawr..😔"

The whole thing is they're on a quest to find Laura and Gabby, because when everything went to shit, they were on a cabin trip and now Logans brain is itching because he dosn't know where his babies are and its driving him insane. Once he finds them, they're gonna shack up somewhere with food and animals to hunt, and hes gonna make a little shed outside for Wade to sleep because he'll kill him if he bites one of the girls.

He dosnt care that much about himself really and he hates himself deep down for not being able to trust wade anymore but even wade dosnt trust wade, sometimes wandering off on purpose, staying about 30 feet away from him at all times, growling and giving Logan that glazed over look of unconsiousness. The only good thing about this, though, is after he removes himself from the idea of hurting Logan (because if logaj were to become infected - HA! Your all fucked. Utterly fucked. The whole humanoid species would go extinct because he'd kill anything that moved) he feels more trusting of him and it's not uncommon for them to hug after either. Afterall Wade- Some how???- is still wade and is very affectionate and sensitive when its not returned.

This whole thing also makes him think worse about himself, kicking reflective objects or staring at himself in a shop window in utter shock and disgust with a face of 'thats me..?' While logans raiding the place for supplies.

Did you know zombies can cry? Well, Wade could. Not a lot, only able to get a bit of liquid from dehydration, but sometimes Logan will catch him just... sitting there.. crying. Upset with himself for being bit. Upset with himself for trying to bite logan all the time. Upset at how ugly he is. Upset that he's starving all the time. Upset that he can't even talk to anyone, and Logan just has to guess what he's saying 90% of the time. Bro is literally

When they DO find Laura and Gabby, the girls are doing great. Laura was going to blow wades head off until Gabby ran in the shot, hugging him instantly, only to be ripped away.

"Of course my dad is the weirdo married to a zombie." Laura grunts, but is secrelty happy that wade is still 'alive'

Gabby, being as young as she is, thinks it's so SICK that her dad is a zombie now, giggling when he talks to her and holding his hand. She's not allowed near him for long, and not at all by herself, but Gabby bassically becomes Wades number one supporter, defending him when he messes up and snaps at laura.

"He's just hungry!! He's not bad! It's not bad to be hungry!" She'll say. "You wouldn't kill me if I was hungry.." she tells her bigger, more survival oriented sister whos suggested putting wade out of his misery, for his own sake. "I tried that... he found me again 3 days later." Logan tells her with a pang in his chest. It had taken everything in him to kill him the first time, and sobbed himself to sleep the next 2 days. By the third when he noticed Wade following him from a distance he couldn't believe it.

Not even the apocalypse could keep them away from each other..

[kryptznnn]

♡/♛- It's Been A While [III]

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₊•.°.⋆✮⋆.°.•₊ ₊•.°.⋆✮⋆.°.•₊ ₊•.°.⋆✮⋆.°.•₊

➸ INTERESTS; -mha!shouta aizawa x quirk-using!freader

➸ BACKGROUND; - after an attack at the high school you studied in, you were requested by your work firm and the firm of that school to work as a teacher there for extra security, incase an attack were to occur again to protect the students (and teachers). Unfortunately, it won't be as easy as you expected when you rekindle with old friends, and a specific someone.

➸ WARNINGS; - wc. 4.5k, romantic tension, traumatic disturbances, mentions of medications, bad health history, hallucinations, little bit angsty, haunted by the past, sexual tension, shaking, indecisiveness, confusion, etc.

➸a.i; - its 6am i sleep, also posting the masterlist for the series whenever I wake up, it should be updated on all of the chapters sooner or later this afternoon (also ik the chapter is so long im sorry i was bored) !!

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♡/♛- It's Been A While [ II ]

♡/♛- It's Been A While Masterlist

You sighed as you placed the textbook you were reading back down on your desk your students rushed out of your class. The last bell of the day had rung, and it also seemed like the deadline for your answer to the question Shouta had asked you prior.

His words still rang in your head, you kept both of your hands over the sides of your head, thinking. There was no way you could reject his offer, but there was also no way you could accept it either. Luck was barely on your side knowing that whoever broke into your apartment didn't know your schedule had changed, you couldn't put others in danger.

If anything considered from the heads up your boss had given you last night, whoever or whatever they were must have been after you for two reasons: your status within the embassy, or your quirk. The second reason made much more sense to you however, because if they had wanted you for your title, they would've come to see you much sooner.

Now was a horrible time to even think about or do such a thing, especially since you had to drug yourself up over prescribed medications to even keep your powers and emotions at bay. It's easy for someone to use you for your powers rather than status, honestly that's what you liked so much about the embassy, you barely had to use your quirk.

No one even knew about your quick use of medications to keep yourself at a low after so many losses from your powers. Each time you convinced yourself they were accidents, and honestly, they were, but the number of nightmares you had about the occurrences said otherwise.

Now with everything hitting you all at once you had the option to move in somewhere secure, somewhere safe. You knew Shouta and you knew he was someone who could take care of you, and himself. He was a pro hero for fucks sake, one of the best at that, it can't be as dangerous as you think if you were to accept his offer.

Maybe it'll be a good thing, maybe just maybe this is one of the only opportunities I'll have at being happy or seeing things on the bright side after having such a shit week. Plus, you didn't have to keep paying in cash to stay longer than you intended at the hotel you were planning to stay in.

You stood up from your seat, collecting your belongings from your desk and placing them in your work bag. Determined to find Shouta to speak with him about his offer, unexpectedly you hear a knock coming from your opened doorway to find him standing there.

"Hey" you said softly, glancing back at your desk and grabbing your phone, seeing you had a message. You only turned it off, thinking to yourself you'd answer it later as you placed it in your pocket.

"Hey, I was just stopping by to see if you made up your mind about my offer, it still stands." He replied, his voice heavy as he watched your movements, both of his hands now in his pockets. You looked back at him, now taking him in fully.

He had gotten a lot taller from when you two were this close, of course that was back in high school before you had left. If anything, if you had gotten closer to him, he might as well have towered over you. You only smiled at him and nodded as you threw your bag over your shoulder, placing your hands in your pockets as well.

"I was actually just on my way to go see you about that actually." You began, scanning his face for any reaction from the first half of your statement, only to see nothing but him nodding. "I accept your offer, but I'm not sure I'll be able to thank you enough for it, I have a lot to bring though." You stated, placing a hand out of your pocket and pointing behind you with a smile.

You said softly, you weren't sure if it was the bandages pressed against his collarbone and lower chin that made him put his head down, but you could've sworn he was smiling just now. He'd do that all the time since you two were children, hiding whenever he smiled or laughed, it's good to see that most things haven't changed.

It's almost funny really, how just a few days ago he seemed like he hated you. Was doing everything to avoid you or even speak to you, acting like the grinch almost, and here he was now, with you, smiling because you accepted his offer to move in with him temporarily.

"If it's your bags being too heavy, I can always help you with them and anything else you're bringing. I have plenty of space so you can put your things where you want." He spoke softly, now taking a step towards you, if you were to even move back you would've hit your desk.

You stood your ground and eyed him as he made his way towards you, you only nodded in response. Now gripping on tightly to the bag that weighed down on your shoulder. Your eyes met with Shouta's constantly within seconds, the tension between the two of you becoming thicker with each glance, as you stepped around him to leave you paused.

"If you send me the address to your place I'll stop by later tonight with my things, I need to pack." You said, not even turning to look at him. You needed to get out of that room, and it had to be quick, whatever it was he saw in you to look at you the way you did made you scream internally.

"I don't think I have your new number..." he said as he turned around and watched your state, it's almost as if you could feel him raise a brow, but you didn't dare to turn around and look him in the eyes again.

"My number never changed" you said simply, now turning to the left as your heels clicked. You made your way down the hallway towards the exit and into the parking lot, digging in your pocket to get your car keys. The entire moment the two of you just shared replaying in your head over and over without fail.

As you unlocked your car and took your bag off your shoulder you chewed on your bottom lip. Tossing your bag in the passenger's seat as you sat in the driver's seat, gripping onto the steering wheel for dear life.

This was going to be much more complicated than you expected.

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You scratched your head as you looked at the way you placed your bags within the trunk of your car. It looked so disorganized, but frankly you were too tired to fix them any better, the car ride would've been bumpy regardless, so it didn't matter too much. Just as you were going to close your trunk, your phone vibrated.

You reached in the back pocket of your jeans and pulled it out, seeing a message from Shouta and the person who had messaged you earlier in the afternoon. You closed your trunk and made your way to the driver's seat, locking your car as you sat in the parking lot of the hotel you stayed the night at. Now unlocking your phone and going to messages you saw the message underneath Shouta's from an unknown number, you rose a brow before opening it.

[XXX-XXX-XXXX: I won't let you forget about what you've done to our family]

You felt a twist in your stomach as you read it, already knowing who it was from, one of your old 'accidents' that occurred right after high school. The one that caused you the most grief and nightmares from the tragedy, and the same one that made you quickly cut the deal from being a pro-hero and working full time for the embassy.

Without a second thought you quickly blocked the number, sucking your teeth as you slumped into the seat, tears forming in the corners of your eyes. You quickly swallowed your emotions as you remembered you hadn't answered Shouta's texts, quickly opening it and reading his message.

[Shouta :) : Hey, here's the address XXXX Main St, XXXX ****. Be safe on your trip here, I'll be waiting outside to help with your bags]

You smiled at his text, looking in your rearview mirror at the bags piled up in the trunk. You shook your head and chuckled softly, only hearting his message and pressing on the address that was underlined. It took you straight to the maps app and you followed your GPS to his place, as you followed it you played music from your favorite playlist on the way.

As you got closer and closer to the destination of his place you began to think how it would be. Was it just a two-bedroom apartment or was it something large and cozy like your own apartment. It must depend on the salary he's getting as both a pro hero and as a teacher, in all honesty you had no idea.

He didn't seem like a huge person on decorations or huge flashy things, so you didn't expect much, but when you drove through in the neighborhood you weren't expecting to see such a nice grey tone looking house. When your GPS told you that this was your destination you blinked out of confusion, looking back at the numbers on the house then your phone.

It wasn't wrong, this was definitely your destination, you just weren't expecting all of this. You shook away your thoughts and pulled into the driveway before seeing the garage open as you shut off the car after parking it. As you opened your car door the garage opened fully, revealing Shouta.

Honestly if you hadn't been paying attention you wouldn't have suspected it was him, he looked entirely different than he did a few hours ago. He was built, and you meant it, he was wearing all black, black sweatpants and a black wifebeater. His hair was pulled back into a low ponytail as he kept one hand in his pocket, raising the other one to wave at you.

Thank goodness he did wave at you, because it snapped you out of the little trance you were having of him. There's no way he was hiding all of that in the outfit he wore on the daily with his students and at night on his patrols. As you waved back at him and closed your door to make your way to your trunk you still couldn't wrap your head around it all.

Lost deep in thought you weren't even aware that when you opened your trunk, he was already making his way right behind you. Before you could reach for the first bag in the back his hand grazed yours as he picked it up, then picked up another and threw it over his shoulder.

Your head sunk down slowly as your breath hitched, not wanting to make this more awkward than it already was. You slowly made your way to the side and picked up two much smaller bags and turned to him as he cocked his head to the side, pointing to the house.

"Just follow me and I'll show you where your room is" he said, looking at you, you looked back to the car with a nod quickly. There was no way in hell you two were about to start yet another staring contest, especially now of all times.

As you followed him inside you got a nice view of the house, well the inside anyway, everything was nice and clean. It was honestly pretty bland inside, no sheer pop of color or decors, just furniture that was a sort of marble grey. Anything you could look at or pay attention too other than the handsome sculpted man in front of you would've sufficed.

As you walked down the hallway, you heard him speaking of you having the room entirely to yourself, and the bathroom was just to the side of it. You only hummed in response to his statement as your mind continued to wander, until a sudden question popped up in your head.

"Why are you being so nice to me all of a sudden?" You asked, your question quickly followed by a yawn, to which you covered your mouth with the back of your hand. Shouta placed your bags down in your new room, it was big to say the least, neat and empty. The bed sheets were a tan kind of color, sand almost, along with a cream-colored blanket.

"What do you mean?" He asked, now turning to you and raising a brow as you placed your bags down on your bed, looking around the room to see where you'd place most of your belongings. You looked up at him, taking a glance at his face before walking over to the dresser that was in front of your bed.

"When we first bumped into each other you looked at me like you hated me, now we're here." You said carelessly, looking at your reflection in the mirror as you toyed with your hair for a little, looking over to see him in the mirror as he crossed his arms.

"I've never hated you" he said honestly, you now turned to look at him, in the eyes this time. Seeing the same look he had before, a look of sadness and sorrow. You only hummed in response yet again before opening the empty drawers to your dresser and looking inside them all, planning which draw would hold what.

You only left the room in one swift movement and made your way back to your car and grabbing your last two bags along with your work bag. You closed the trunk as you locked the car and began walking back inside.

Whatever answer he just gave you when you were inside didn’t answer your question, you hated how he always beat around the bush. Now you were too tired to argue or pry to get an answer that you wanted from him, you only returned inside through the garage to see him standing in the hallway waiting for you. Without exchanging any words, he just came over to you, taking the bags from your hands in one swift movement and walked into your room, placing them with the others.

“Thank you” you said, removing your phone and keys from your pockets and placing them on your nightstand by your bed. Shouta only shook his head at your words.

“No need to thank me, follow me so I can show you around” He spoke, now exiting your room and pointing down the hall for you to follow him. You followed behind slowly, turning your gaze back to the walls and floors now, not wanting to look at him knowing how easily your mind wanders.

You wondered how he felt about you, honestly it couldn’t be anything bad, he had offered for you to live in his house after hearing of your problems. Even though things ended rocky between the two of you and started again off to a strange start here you were, pushing everything to the side as he gave you a personal house tour.

You couldn’t even call this fate, as of right now you had no idea what it was, but whatever it was made you more curious than ever. As the small tour came to an end Shouta had shown you practically everything. The kitchen, living room, his bedroom and your bathroom, it wasn’t a lot, but it could be, his home was spacious, and you liked that.

He had even cooked apparently, and you complimented it too. His food was good and honestly you were surprised when he first told you, not expecting him to be the cooking type. Soon after you helped him clean up and stood around as you watched him.

Not to mention to your surprise you felt something pet against the heel of your feet, startling you as you quickly turned around. You were met with a small black cat, meowing at you softly before repeating the same action as before. You only smiled and relaxed, bending over to pet it, your back now facing Shouta.

You grinned as you called it pet names as you continued to pet it before picking it up and reading the collar. ‘Yoyo’ you read and laughed, knowing there was no way Shouta could’ve named her.

“This was definitely Nemuri’s doing, I think you’re more creative than this.” You laughed turning to Shouta, who was dangerously close to you. Your arm had brushed up against his chest and you knew better than to move. You only turned all of your attention back to Yoyo, as if you hadn’t realized what happened.

“Yeah, it was, I wasn’t sure what to name her, but I had help” he replied, placing his hand on the back of his neck and holding it gently as he sighed. You gave Yoyo a small kiss and hug before placing her down back on the floor and standing up again.

Without thinking you turned around and face planted into Shouta’s side, immediately pulling back and apologizing as you held your head. He only shook his head and apologized as well, placing a hand on your shoulder asking if you were alright. You only nodded and drew your shoulder back, feeling dizzy at the feeling.

He smelled good, too good, like one of those really nice colognes that would catch your attention whenever you went shopping and passed by the men’s section. You were snapped out of your trance when it seemed for a split second someone was standing behind him.

You immediately darted your head to the side, only to see the figure disappear as you frowned. You just brushed it off and turned into the kitchen, checking the time. As you counted how many weeks it had been in your head.

8:36pm

You were late to take one of your medications, your alarm had probably been going off for a while now and you weren’t even aware of it. Thankfully you had already eaten so you didn’t have to worry about taking it on an empty stomach.

“I have to go, I’ll uh, I’ll be back” you said with a pause, quickly turning around and making your way back to your room. You quickly shut off the silent alarm that had been ringing on your phone for nearly an hour before grabbing your keys and heading outside.

As you unlocked your car and climbed into the passenger seat to open the glove department you saw a shadow in the rear-view mirror. You turned around slowly only for the figure to yet again disintegrate from your view. You took a deep breath and searched for the bottle you were looking for amongst the junk in the department box, ending your search when you found a bottle labeled ‘Risperdal’.

As you cleaned up and closed your glove department box and locked your car you quickly walked back inside. The figure appearing beside you yet again, muttering whispers to you as you ignored it and made your way back to your room digging in your bag.

Your pill cutter where is your pill cutter. You’re prescribed to only take half of the full number of milligrams the pill had and unfortunately you had already taken the other left over half 3 weeks ago. It was surprising to you almost, you had never taken them so close together before, things like these were only monthly occurrences, but it was getting worse.

You sighed to yourself out of frustration as you couldn’t find what you were looking for, your grip on your bottle tightening as the faceless figure taunted you, practically laughing at you through a mouth it had grown out of nowhere.

You made your way back to the kitchen, embarrassment hitting you as you realized you had one of two options. Either hoping Shouta had a pill cutter around somewhere or using a knife to cut it yourself.

He raised his head as he looked up at you after drying his hands when he finished the dishes. Smiling at you softly before seeing something in your hands and raising a brow as you wet your lips and parted them.

“Hey um, do you have any pill cutters?” You asked quietly, but loud enough for him to hear, he slowly made his way over to you. He opened the cabinet beside your head filled with medications, as he reached to the top shelf and got a green pill cutter and placed it on the counter.

He then made his way over to his fridge and got a cold-water bottle, placing it next to the cutter. The entire time he kept his eyes on you, only that you weren’t looking at him, more or less something behind or around him had your attention.

Your eyes trailed on the figure that now morphed into a teenage girl, one who you had known well in high school. She went around and teased you laughing at Shouta as she grinned at you sinisterly as she spoke, you couldn’t hear what she was saying as it all came out as whispers. You knew it wasn't her though, the way her body was so deformed, and her face was twisted proved it was all in your head.

You then looked over to the pill cutter, placing the pill bottle in your hand on the counter before opening it quickly. Then opening the water bottle, shaking slightly as you did so before placing a pill within the tiny machine on the counter.

The girl had now made her way over to you as you placed the device in your hand, clamping your hands down on the button attempting to cut the pill. The more and more she whispered to you and placed her hands on your shoulders the more you trembled, your vision clouded with tears as you chewed on your bottom lip.

Within seconds you felt two large hands overcoming your own, and a firm chest being pressed against your back as you heard a click from the pill cutter. You gasped softly as you were snapped out of your trance for a short while as Shouta took the pill cutter from your hands.

He soon opened the device and took the left half of the pill with one hand, his other one rested on your shoulder. There was absolute silence between the two of you, the only thing making noise was you, your breathing was ragged. He paused as he read the label of your pill bottle, frowning softly before turning his attention back to you.

“Can I trust you to take it yourself or do you need my help?” He asked softly, his body still pressed against yours, you only shook your head in response. You only kept your head down and turned around slightly, the whispers of before echoing in your mind.

Shouta hadn’t said anything else, he only lifted your head slightly, his hand grabbing your jaw softly as he looked at you. It’s as if you weren’t even there with him, looking over the side of his shoulder, your mouth still agape. You watched as the deformation of the girl disappeared, her laughter leaving a trail behind.

He took the pill and placed it at your lips, his fingers brushing against your lips focused your attention on him, your eyes now locked with his. You parted your lips even more now, letting the cut pill go past your lips and hit your tongue, the taste bitter as your eyes never left his.

Your eyes were watery was his first thought, the same way they always were whenever you were about to cry. For as long as he knew you it had been that way, you’d squint slightly before letting your eyes water and cry, and he hated it.

He hated how conceited you were, especially with him, and now it hadn’t seemed like things had changed much. Even now, years later you were taking on way much more than you could chew, and he always blamed the embassy for it.

The two of you broke eye contact as you were the first to turn around, placing a hand on his chest to push him away softly so you could reach for the water bottle he had gotten you before. You quickly chugged the bottle two thirds of the way down, the bitter taste still in your mouth as you placed the bottle down.

The hand you had on Shouta’s chest hadn’t left, he grabbed it softly, tugging you towards him as you turned around again. You looked at his face, hinted with disappointment and possibly anger as he saw your gaze.

“Y/n. Risperdal? What has happened since you joined the embassy?” He said, now bending slightly to reach your eye level, his hands not leaving your arms. You had heard him, but his words weren’t as loud as the whispers that were still echoing in your head before you spoke.

“I’m fine, I took it too late” you replied slightly, ready to push him off of you, but his grip only tightened, pulling you in closer. You’re too close to one another, way too close. You weren't sure if your thumping heartbeat was getting louder from the way he held you or the sounds ringing in your mind, but you didn't like it.

Even through the haze of what you’re going through you can tell that this was wrong, even though it felt good, and it made you feel warm inside. You shook your head and pushed him off of you successfully this time as he left you go.

“I said I’m fine.” You repeated harshly, glaring at him as you watched his sad expression quickly turn angry, glaring back at you in return. Your hand clammy as you squeezed it open and closed again. There was no need for him to care so closely to you as he had before, you two weren't together anymore.

“You’re still a shitty liar, I guess you haven’t changed since when you left.” He responded harshly, you looked to the side and thought back to when you left initially years back. Your expression softening as you took a breath and stopped clamming with your hand.

You only excused yourself and bid yourself goodnight, practically speed walking back your room before slamming the door behind you. Taking all preparations and moving your bags to the side as you got ready for bed, laying underneath the covers with your earphones in listening to your music as you tried to tune out your thoughts before drifting to sleep.

Maybe you were right about putting Shouta in danger by living here, but the danger wasn’t from the outside or whoever was after you.

The danger was you.

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Taglist: @getoisinnocent

✴🕷 please do not copy, plagiarize, edit, or translate any works submitted by me. all works are originated and all other pictures used within those works are online images. thank you!! @kryptznnn

[elis-blawg222]

November 8 - Friday

Whew! Caught up at last!! (took me long enough)

Today was actually pretty good. I called Angel before school which made me really happy!! (I love him sm ill sob rn actually). My class wasn't toooo bad. The teacher talked sooo much ugh, but I drew the whole time so it was fine. I made my oc thinnn n pretty, love him. Also we had to go around the room and talk to people for like 30 minutes. 30. (did yk you have 30 minutes??)

It was so nerve wracking, especially because I was unprepared lol. I bet I looked like such a total weirdo with the lack of eye contact I was making, but at the time I was just trying not to break a nervous sweat LMAO.

Then, after my class I went to the library (on call w/Ange) and did an assignment. I went home afterwards because my phone was gonna die, and I needed my charger.

After a bit at home, I went to my next class, and I had a test in this one. It went good I think! We studied beforehand which I'm really grateful for.

We had a break in this class, so I went to walk around for a minute, and during this my mom texted me with:

"Eli

What did u eat today"

...

nothing. So, I said "I had some chicken nuggetss after my class hehe"

to which she responded "No fries no pop. How many nuggets"

GURL. So i was like "I did get some fries lol? and i got 10 why?"

and she just CONVENIENTLY NEVER RESPONDED. UGH.

(but wait theres more.)

After my class ended I went home and got ready for work. I was otp w/Angel (because seriously when am I not?) and he was playing minecraft. It was so peaceful and entertaining to watch and listen to him play- I loved every bit of it. Then, we talked about how we should play together (I ltrly will do anything to idc).

Work was actually ehh, not toooo bad. My dad and friend and her mom stopped by which was nice, and also my hairdresser LOL. They both tipped really well (obviously my dad did but yk).

I went home after what felt like one billion years, I was so so so happy. When I got home I just said a few things about my day like I usually do, and made sure to slip in the fact that I got a free meal at work. Which isn't wrong, I did, but I didn't get anything. I actually am just gonna let my friend get something tomorrow. but they don't have to know all that shhhhhhhh.

Then my mom stopped in front of me and was like what did you eat? and so i repeated myself bc no one listens to me <3

(I told her fried chicken tenders, fries, mac and cheese for context, a very 'me' meal tbh or at least it was)

Then, she was like "how many chicken tenders?" "no drink?" "did you finish it? all of it?" "so then you ate 2 full meals today?"

oh. my god. like. genuinely.

why. is. she. interrogating. me. pls. fucking. leave. me. alone. IM GENUINELY MORTIFIED AND HONESTLY IM SO AGGRIVATED. LET ME STARVE IN PEACE HOLY FUCK.

I tried to act like a normal person and be like ??? why are you interrogating me? BC WHY ARE YOU (as if I'm not literally starving myself)

She was just like "because I need to make sure you're getting nutrients." ok girl.

Then, I went to my room and she went to bed. I cleaned my room a bit and did a homework assignment, so I'm pretty proud of myself.

Also if you couldn't tell by now I fasted today. I was gonna either 48 hr fast or do 2 24 hr fasts back to back, but I think I'm just gonna do around 36 hrs. I wanna eat in front of my mom tomorrow so maybe she'll start leaving me alone (I seriously doubt it).

It just gets really frustrating when every meal I have she thinks isn't enough, even when I'm genuinely full. I can't eat like I used to like I physically cannot, she has to get that.

Anywho, I was thinking of making some cucumber boats tomorrow, I think it'll be fun.

Total Steps: 6.7k

Look at me meeting my step goal for once. I'm gonna start really making an effort at meeting it!

'Til tomorrow :)

(P.S. actually getting activity on these makes me so nervous but haiii)

[a-s-levynn]

"Wash me clean again before I pull myself beneath the waves" A Series of Small Offerings - III/11 - day31

[breadvidence]

Using this space to reply to both @blatherby and @fluentisonus!

@blatherby: right right right, "The time has come to journey on/And from this day he must be gone"—and I do think you're correct that standard fanon is he's going into this encounter with the intent to leave, though I suppose I don't know how much by percentage Valvert fic is actually based on the musical vs the Brick, and for the former it's not a misreading per se. I'm thrown, in any case! Really having to recalibrate my sense of the level of his self-harm and suicidality (which still sits at "very nonzero", but slightly lower than "dialed up to eleven", I guess—I think that the line "He was at his own request and through his own complicity driven out of all his happinesses one after the other; and he had this sorrow, that after having lost Cosette wholly in one day, he was afterwards obliged to lose her again in detail" signals that he wouldn't have been able to sustain himself on this course regardless of Marius' part in things).

@fluentisonus said in tags:

#yes!!!! this was something i was thinking abt a lot when i just got here on this last read#& i think contributed to my being more frustrated with/upset by marius this time around than before#i think the other line here is that really stood out to me is 5.8.2:#''He came every day because he had not the strength to take Marius’ words otherwise than literally''#<- which to me does Not speak to someone who is planning to stop visiting.#or at least to actually go through with not visiting#he's in fact willfully taking marius at his literal word re visiting rather than what i think he knows derp down marius would prefer#like he gave marius incomplete reasons & scared him badly (his (jvj's) fault!) but the m jean stuff is i think just intended as a layer of#separation to visiting & that last horrible wrench is all marius. & while not quite unexpected it's not what he (ivj) would have done#naturally if given the choice. in fact as we see it's incredibly hard to prevent himself from going#anyways really good post!#les mis#i think another thing though is that he asks marius to visit when he's quite literally at the door. like. he knows he can't bear#to not have this one thing. like he says all that & asks marius if he should see her again; takes his 'cold' no; gets to the door; & then#closes the door again & turns around to beg to see her <- tbc this is not a disagreement with your point that he always intends to visit#cosette just that both in-book & out of book it's easy to mistake bc it being at the end there makes it almost Seem like an afterthought#rather than i think one of the most genuinely earnest parts of his confession because to him he's been building up to something#he's not convinced he deserves & is asking against his better judgement#But i think this doesn't look good particularly to marius#it looks like he's backtracking on what he's set up#& marius gives in in the moment but it's one of the things he specifically regrets caving to in the next chapter#& i think is frustrated jvj couldn't fully follow through so he decides to force the issue#if that makes sense#hmm also (<- sorry op to come back & add more tags hours later) speaking of the m jean/vouvoyer thing i think you can very much read that#as being not a step towards a final separation but rather a way (to his mind) he can safely & perhaps even more honestly (?) Continue to#visit cosette. he can still see her without being connected to her in sn incriminating way . like you say#<- ofc this is not at all how it comes across to cosette

Yes!!! The level of my "jesus, you murdered that man" feelings towards Marius definitely dialed up a notch by reading the scene through this lens. As I said in responding above: re-reading further, I think it's a misjudgment on Valjean's part—that he can survive on black bread, but not on so little of Cosette—but I do wonder if, in the long run, as she once convinced him to have a fire and better food for her sake, whether she would've rekindled their bond and said to hell with this to the M. Jean and vouvoyer and cellar. Like, she's caught up in a new marriage, in learning what it means to love openly and fuck a man and live in the world, but I like to think given a few more months to settle into things she would've come back around to her papa—because she might not need him like she did when she was alone in the woods, but there's more in love than needing.

Which sidetracks me from "what did Jean Valjean mean to do?" to "what did Jean Valjean actually do?", and in the context of Cosette's happiness—it's always fraught! always makes me holler. Poor old man, and poor child.

I've dithered over making this post because I will feel incredibly silly if everyone else got this on the first go-through rather than the—Lord alone knows how many times I've read this particular scene, actually—but there I was, me and "The Seventh Circle and the Eighth Heaven"—as you do, for idle and entertainment, and I reach

If you will allow it, I will come to see her. I assure you that I desire it greatly. If I had not cared to see Cosette, I should not have made to you the confession that I have made, I should have gone away; but, as I desired to remain in the place where Cosette is, and to continue to see her, I had to tell you about it honestly. You follow my reasoning, do you not? it is a matter easily understood.

And realized that despite the character stating his reason right there in the text I have misunderstood badly. I took Valjean's intent with this confession and in his behavior afterwards to be separation from Cosette, that his desired outcome is to die alone, that he struggles against his love of her to reach that solitude, but it's—not. He says earlier that it's not, as well.

Stay, the unfortunate point is that I have a thread in my heart, which keeps me fast. It is when one is old that that sort of thread is particularly solid. All life falls in ruin around one; one resists. Had I been able to tear out that thread, to break it, to undo the knot or to cut it, to go far away, I should have been safe. I had only to go away; there are diligences in the Rue Bouloy; you are happy; I am going. I have tried to break that thread, I have jerked at it, it would not break, I tore my heart with it.

The thread—to Cosette. He can't separate himself. He would not have to make this confession if he could simply leave her. Therefore he has to confess to Marius for two reasons, as I see it: (1) a big dramatic compulsion to honesty about his symbolic status as one who cannot live in the family of men, sure, but (2) like, real literally, he cannot live in the house. Valjean is practical, he makes arrangements, he's smart, his confession draws from the saint but I think it's also the thief, and what does the thief need? A co-conspirator. Both morally and practically he's averse to living at the Rue des Filles-du-Calvaire, and with both Cosette and her "master" Marius pushing him to move in, he'd have to move totally away, as he's certainly not going to give in—but now he's got Marius' backing to allow him to stay at the Rue de l'Homme-Armé, and he can exist in the in-between space he's always occupied, there in the back courtyard of Cosette's life.

I always wondered at Valjean's vacillation—that he says "To-day, Cosette passes out of my life; our two roads part. Henceforth, I can do nothing for her.", then begs Marius for the right to visit her. But he didn't change his intent at all; he was always keen to visit, to live on the crumbs that scatter from the table. He simply can't pull up a chair.

Marius' passive-aggressive attack on that thread, the destruction of Valjean's heart, Valjean is complicit in accepting that, yes. But he did not come into this parlor looking for that outcome.

🤦‍♂️

[ssaalexblake]

I'm forever astounded at all the Gallifrey/time lord society stanning that goes on in fandom? It's the monkey paw!!!! Read the small print!!!

So much of dw's canon will Entirely pass people by, literally spanning from the earlier years of classic who to the present day, if you can't identify that Gallifreyen society is rotten to the core.

The Doctor couldn't be the hero if they continued to sully themselves in a brutal empire's name.

(it's the british empire. but space. british empire bad. very bad. come on.)

[itsnobodysproblem]

Most Sherlock Holmes adaptations I've seen tend to place their Final Problem towards the mid point of the series (or even a bit earlier) - it's also in my opinion the best way of going about it, so you have time enough for the characters to adjust after the reunion but they know each other well enough for the events of Fina to be devastating.

Sherlock & Co is done with 20 of the adventures. How many are there? Fifty-something? Almost sixty? Let's say we'll be entering mid-point territory after the 25th story.

So let's pretend for a moment that we have 5 more stories until The Final Problem. Ok.

Estimating an adventure at 3 episodes each, that would mean little over 3 months - maybe 3 and a half? Starting, of course, from the end of Sign of Four, which will be somewhere in December.

So let's say 3, maybe 4 months into 2025. That would be, what? Late march, early april?

Early april?

John having to tell the listeners that Sherlock is dead, in early april?

Quick calendar searck reveals what I was praying it would - the 1st of april will be on a Tuesday next year.

So what I'm saying

What I'm saying is Sherlock &Co has the opportunity to do the funniest fucking thing

[kelpshippingceo]

I absolutely LOVE teen beach movie so I thought I'd make a greenflower au of it!

close ups under cut

[paging-possum]

on some level I understand that welcome to hell is probably a little harder to sell than hazbin given the *gestures vaguely* entire main plotline of w2h THAT SAID im going to be mad about it forever. because one of them is actually funny and has good character design and compelling dynamics and a good plot and its not the one about the freaking hotel.

[vaguely-concerned]

sometimes I think about the fact that bacta lost his virginity to tryst's sister. who looks enough like him that they easily pass for each other when they swap clothes. *touches ground gingerly* something psychosexual happened here. (good for rendezvous honestly it isn't her fault her brother is too emotionally dense and/or dysfunctional to get in there.) and then the next morning he found out the first person he was ever in love with probably isn't dead after all and never contacted him. it's a lot, to be a bacta in this world. single father despite having three co-parents, harried husband and grieving widower who's never once been married but is sometimes for sure divorced, teenage boy at his first real party, 'as your doctor I feel compelled to point out -- okay, that's, you're doing it anyway, sure, why not ', haunted veteran at the tender age of 17, owner of what must be the most common face across the galaxy, parentified oldest sibling despite being the youngest adult on the crew, sole qualified clipboard holder....... he's somehow doing it all at the same time and he's doing it on phindar, while making cupcakes